The Tomboy and The Beast
by AliceStar
Summary: Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.
1. The Tomboy

Alice: Hey everyone, here is a new story! But before we get into the details, 1) The characters all belong to Nintendo and 2) meet my friend and fellow author who is helping me with ideas.

Ultrra: (waves) Yo. And you forgot to say rival.

Alice: I'm surprised there aren't more Daisy x Bowser stories out there. All the Bowser x Daisy stories I've read are really interesting! But we still need more because I feel so…alone O_O

Ultrra:..I always thought Bowser had a thing for Peach, right? Isn't that why there's a shortage?

Alice: (sweat drop) Well…Yeah….but…

Ultrra: Well…maybe that's why!

Alice:…So yes! I hope you all enjoy my story! There will be many turns and twists ahead! It's a Romance/Drama/Comedy!

Ultrra: A romadromedy!

Alice: Comdramance!

Ultrra:…Mine's better. Anyways if author notes bother you, then feel free to just skip ahead to the story. I know I HATE reading these. I hate how Alice is dragging me into this.

Alice: (glares)

Ultrra:..Okay so I don't hate being dragged into this…

Alice: We'll address reviews and interesting concepts brought up! :)

Ultrra: How about dumb ideas? Like 'Who is Mario?' 'Why put Daisy and Bowser together in a story?'

Alice:..No we'll only talk about good…ideas…

Ultrra: Oh okay. Well remember, always feel free to skip our author rants!

(Everyone races ahead to read the story)

Alice:…Good one -_-

Ultrra: ^_^;

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"Top of the morning!"<p>

"Good morning Professor," we chorused.

Class hadn't started yet and already I was eager to leave. History was _not _my strong suit and I found it as dry as the folds of a magikoopa's skin—I know, the truth hurts sometimes. The elderly toad took his place at the front of the classroom. He hobbled to the educator's elevated oak podium and smiled fondly. He arranged his notes carefully before fixing his spectacles, "Would anyone like to tell me what we're learning about today?"

The old professor was near-sighted so _maybe_ if I was discreet I could make a run for it. I rose to a half crouch, hoping to be undetected as I carefully gathered my books. With one last sweep, I procured my books and crept away.

But then life's cruel sense of humor kicked me in the rear savagely; I caught Toad's foot and tripped, spilling my books with _marvelous_ gusto. Toad laughed loudly, Peach was mannerly enough to hide her giggles, and the blind ole prof didn't see a thing. At least Toadette _pretended _it didn't happen. The old professor pressed the question again and this time Toadette raised her hand, "We're going to review the creation myth."

"That is correct Miss Toadette."

"Ah the wondrous creation myth, a tale that has survived the centuries and millennia. We have much to learn..."

I slumped back into my seat. Peach's lips quirked into a smile, "That's what you get for trying such a stunt."

I had nothing so I shot back an unflattering mimic of her soft voice, "_That's what you get for trying such a stunt."_

She laughed, continuing to power up her petal-pink laptop. So why did I hate the creation myth? Because it was a folklore drilled into our heads as children, rehashed again and again and _again_; it's still the same, boring old tale.

I groaned loudly. The Professor harrumphed, "Does our itinerary _displease_ you Princess Sarasaland?"

I blinked dumbly; the professor had an arched eyebrow and a pointed stare as Toad and Toadette turned around in their seats. Toad spoke to Toadette, "I love classes when she's here. She _always _screws up!"

"Shut up before I turn you into toadstool soup!"

And to compound an already awkward moment, my voice echoed, bouncing off the walls like sonar. The prof's glare intensified as I laughed nervously, "What was your question again?"

"Does our itinerary displease you?"

"...No?"

Toad snickered again. I shook my index finger at him; it was supposed to be a threatening gesture but he only smiled larger.

"Excellent," the affronted glare hadn't left the prof's face, "perhaps you could enlighten the class with today's assignment…?"

"Uh…Umm...Hmm?"

Crap, here I was caught slacking again. Toad's snickers did not help and I shot a glare his direction. _That little Jerk! _Toadette smiled, trying to hide her laughter as Peach shook her head, sighing with resignation.

"Um…?" I croaked weakly.

"Could anyone help Lady Sarasaland?"

Peach didn't spare a glance at her itinerary, "We shall study pages 205 through 210 for the creation story."

"Splendid Princess Toadstool!" The professor chirruped happily.

I shot a mock glare at Peach and mouthed, 'show off'. She grinned and resumed listening; delicately folding her hands within her lap. I slouched in my seat, arms crossed and leg jiggling in an impatience cadence.

"Now then, let us turn to the pages our fair princess has prescribed and begin."

Pages fluttered and laptop screens glowed to life as we prepared for the upcoming lecture. Peach poked my side, "Pay attention."

"I am! I am!" I grumbled.

I wasn't.

The prof cleared his throat before he began.

_"Before dawn glowed in arches of pink and gold and before the world was familiar with the beauties of night and day, sun and moon, summer and winter, there existed four Star Mothers."_

I glared sightlessly at my text book. It was practically brand-new, adorned with fresh pearly pages unmolested from my lack of interest. As the professor read in droll monotones, Toad was busy scribbling notes in a blue notepad.

To my right I could peek at Peach's textbook. While used and well-loved, it appeared brand spanking new. The only true sign of her devotion were pages filled with numerous pink and peach page stickers.

_"There was the Star Mother of COURAGE, who blazed of dauntless conviction and bravery. There was the Star Mother of LOVE, a kindred soul whose mercy overflowed. The Star Mother of POWER, a fierce deity afire with admirable strength and might. Last of all was the Star Mother of STRENGTH OF HEART. Her indomitable will and optimism shone like a glowing beacon of light."_

I rested my face in my palm dourly; I could be outside right now but _nooo_ I had to be inside learning about the creation myth for the ten thousandth time! Today was perfect soccer weather: the climate temperate and the green meadows were choked with fluttery flowering shrubs. It was the beginning of spring and vegetation in the Mushroom Kingdom was abloom in a floral explosion.

Such beauty missed my kingdom. Sarasaland was always golden; in the spring, fall, summer and winter it was golden. It felt like such a waste to be in the classroom on such a pretty day.

_"Each of the Star Mothers ruled a domain. One mother lived in the greenest of valleys, another in the golden sands, the next in flaming fire, and the last Star Mother lived in the iciest snows."_

I peered at Peach who was enraptured. Though she had a pink notebook open with her foofy pink pen diligently waiting, I did not know why; Peach loved and knew this story by heart. Enamored, her blue eyes sparkled as her petal pink lips set in a soft smile; the magical tale was a comforting solace to her heart.

Peach had always been enchanted with the tale's elements of magic, love and bitter sorrow. Even as a child Peach had beseeched Toadsworth to tell us the story before bedtime. As the old professor continued to read aloud, Peach smiled at the elderly tutor and bobbed her head to acknowledge interest. As for me? I could barely keep my eyes open.

_"In each of their separate domains, the Star Mothers grew lonely. Their hearts swelled and yearned for the company of their sisters. Millenniums passed and they only grew lonely and more alone. "_

With a soft sigh, I glanced out of the window longingly; out in the open green pastures a group of toads milled about.

_"To remedy their pain, each Star Mother gave birth. It wasn't long before nations were created, their own people. Though the Star Mothers were sisters, their children were vastly different from one another. And though the Star Mothers had their own civilizations to keep, they still longed to see their sisters."_

Some of the toads were watering floral bushes and others were cutting the emerald-green grass. One toad had a mischievous smirk on his face before he turned the hose onto his fellow gardener.

The lady toad squealed happily, covering herself as she laughed. That triggered the start of the water fight as the toads flung buckets of water at each other, laughing.

_"After several millennia passed, the Star Mothers had a reunion. Smiles bright and hearts aglow, they were excited to see one another. As an added treat, the Star Mothers brought along their children, their created people."_

_"The Star Mothers thought their children would love one another but instead they were cruel. The Star Mothers were aghast. The unique differences amongst the people led to fights and soon cold hatred ran amuck. Blood was shed and wars conflagrated."_

I groaned, slapping a palm to my forehead. I can't believe I'm stuck in the palace. What I wouldn't give to be out there, kicking some butt in that water fight.

"…Right Princess Sarasaland?"

"Huh?"

My head snapped up; I was caught daydreaming by our tutor. From my peripheral I could see Toad smirking as Toadette tried to hide a giggle. The professor did _not _look happy.

Crap.

The prof cleared his throat, "The Star mothers stopped the wars themselves, yes?"

"Uh…yeah?"

Mentally I cursed when I saw Toad and Peach shaking their heads. The professor smirked, "Oh really? Has the creation myth added a new twist? Could someone aid Princess Sarasaland? How did the wars stop?"

Toad raised his hand, "By the time the wars started the Star Mothers were too old, hearts weary. The Star Mothers chose a candidate, a host of their power. It was their chosen descendants that used their new power to stop the world-wide wars."

"Excellent Sire Toad," the professor chuckled, arching an eyebrow at me, "Perhaps you should study a bit more Lady Sarasaland? Next week we shall have a quiz. I hope to see vast improvement in your studies."

"Uh…don't worry I will," I had the good grace to blush, "Um, may I use the restroom? I gotta pee."

The professor peered at me with disdain, "Yes you may Princess…however next time could you please _try_ to exercise a much more…ladylike mannerism?"

"Yeah, sure."

I rose from my seat and left the classroom. As I strolled through the hall, I gazed at the blue sky and green meadows wistfully. I need a break, so why not just take a tiny one? I've been up since dawn learning how to walk and talk like a _real_ princess and really, I did deserve a break.

I grinned impishly; commencing operation 'ditch class.'

I walked through the palace, pretending to look busy as passing toad servants fluttered by unaware of my plan. I steered clear of the throne room. Uncle knew the drill; anytime I was out of class, I was playing hooky.

I reached a quiet hallway and quickly slipped out of the nearest window. I picked up my dress and took off in a dash, adrenaline rushing through my veins in a heady explosion. When the palace was barely in sight, I slowed to a saunter.

I peered back to see if I made a clean getaway; there were no trailing servants or any unwanted company. Boom. Mission accomplished. It was beautiful; the warm air heated my skin pleasantly and the tall grass tickled my legs. With a soft sigh, I fell back into the lush meadow. The thick emerald tendrils pillowed my fall as I sank comfortably into the blanket of sweet-smelling pasture.

I placed my arms behind my head and smiled; grass stains be damned, this was a slice of Star Haven. All this bottle green meadow felt quite foreign as I hailed from Sarasaland, a kingdom of nothing but golden desert and dry heat.

The Mushroom Kingdom was temperate and cool compared to my kingdom. To travel in Sarasaland, the citizens wrapped scarves around their heads to avoid the harsh burn of the sun.

Father would be so mad if he knew I was ditching another class. _You ought to be more like your cousin._ That phrase I had heard my entire life, everything I did was compared to Peach in a cruel ridicule. Most people loved to compare our appearance; Peach was tall and statuesque and most days I stood at an unimpressive five foot three.

Peach had long, sparkling champagne blonde hair to contrast my dark ginger tresses; haha yeah I'm a redhead and sadly all the stereotypes are true in my case: I'm pushy, short-tempered and 'fiery'. Fiery being the worst of the redhead stereotype just 'cuz it's so lame and unimaginative.

My cousin's beauty was striking and head-turning where as I was unexceptional. I was a girl with shoulder-length hair, a natural bronze tan and big, blue eyes. Magazines seemed to gush over big, pretty eyes but I think they're more of a pain in the ass than flattering. My blinkers cut off at least five years from my true age and everyone thinks I'm far younger than what I really am. Even to this day, people guess I'm like fourteen. _Fourteen! _I'm nine years older than that!

Maybe everyone thinks I'm a teenager because on top of being short and bubbly-eyed, I virtually have no chest. I've been uninspired to try makeup since I wasn't blessed with Peach's striking, angelic features. The _first time_ I've tried eyeliner I all but stabbed my eye out with it.

You _bet_ I learned my lesson that day. Daisy and makeup do not mix. In fact Daisy and pretty doesn't mix. Now don't get me wrong, I was nowhere near busted but I wasn't a fallen angel. Hmm, what was the term used for someone who wasn't gut-bustlingly pretty? Oh yeah it's 'cute'.

I am Daisy the 'cute' princess of Sarasaland. I'm chilling in the Mushroom kingdom for a month to understudy how the Mushroom kingdom is able to successfully manage their economy or some junk like that.

I've stayed here for three of those four weeks and truth be told I'm rather sick of it here! I love my cousin Peach to death but this stay here has been a bootcamp!

I think—scratch that—I _know _I'm here to learn from Peach how to be 'more ladylike.' I'm here to study the success of the prosperous Mushroom kingdom, true, but the _real_ reason is to feminize the tomboyish princess of Sarasaland.

Ugh.

I rose to my feet and strolled towards a familiar oak tree. I reached inside the knothole and pulled out my prize; I kept all kinds of goodies here during my stay. So by now it should be obvious I do this 'ditching' thing quite a bit. During week two of my stay in the kingdom, Peach began to catch on.

She would openly let me know she disapproved of my behavior and scolded me kindly, but she never tattled. Even my sweet cousin didn't like tattletales. I grinned as smug as a Cheshire cat and flopped onto my stomach, flipping through a WWGF, World Wrestling Glitzville federation magazine.

I glanced at a tiny golden pocket watch; it was eight thirty. Nine o'clock would mean the start of etiquette class. If I wasn't back before then, things would look suspicious and I'd have to answer for that. My dad would be furious and I did _not_ enjoy angering that guy.

Sitting through etiquette class would make you want to pull your hair out and scream! It's two hours of 'hold the cup this way', 'fold the napkin in your lap that way,' 'giggle at any joke that was attempted' and my favorite, 'ladies don't eat more than three pastries.'

Keep in mind most of the pastries served at tea parties are no bigger than any two of my fingers together. I could eat a whole tray myself and still be hungry.

_And that's why I have to take a break._

I've had enough brainwashing for a day. Etiquette class is two hours of torture and that's not even including the other boring sewing, gardening, and cooking lessons too.

Double ugh.

I can tolerate being forced to monotonously force a needle through the same damn—oh yes, princess' don't swear either—pattern for an hour, practice walking with books on my head but I will not stomach being squeezed into a corset; some ridiculous invention women use here in the mushroom kingdom.

A corset? You can tell a _man_ thought of that invention; make an already thin woman have an even smaller waistline and suffocate while she does it. And then pass it off as 'the latest rage' so even more women can be suckered into doing something _stupid_.

And don't _even_ get me started on high heels; shoes that not only mess up your legs but the pattern of your natural walk. All of that because heels supposedly make your derriere look nice.

Ugh.

All these thoughts were giving me a headache. Now it's time to get lost in the fine, violence-filled, testosterone-raging world of wrestling.

Rawk Hawk anybody?

Yes.

A hell yes at that.

As I started to read an article about Rawk Hawk defeating some amateur boo, a long shadow eclipsed my sunlight. If the said shadow wasn't disturbing my reading light then it wouldn't have been bad.

I looked up.

I blinked in stupor and leaned back; he was larger than I could even imagine. He had massive arms covered in nothing but pure muscle, scale, and spiked leather arm bands. His head full of flame-red, unruly mane scorched under the sun like fire as two colossal pearly horns and scalding red eyes blazed brilliantly.

There I looked into the grinning face of…

King Bowser?

"Hey there," he growled, smirking in a ruthless grin that showcased sharp incisors.

"Uh…?"

He was in a hovering clown car which had an insidious grin. Arms crossed, Bowser grinned wickedly. Or was he sneering? You know it's hard to tell but I'm pretty sure it's not a nice smile. What in the world was Bowser doing here?

How does he get in the Mushroom kingdom so easily? But the most important question is like seriously: why does security suck _so_ badly here? An even better question would be is how did I not even notice him approach? That flying, ugly clown car's propellers were nearly deafening.

Was I that focused on how terrible corsets were for women? Huh, well he must have been here for Peach. Should I try to scream out and call out for help? It's kind of pointless really since there's no one within a mile's radius of where I'm at.

Should I try to put up a fight and take him down? He's in an armored clown car and the only weapon I have is this magazine or potentially one of my stilletoes.

…

Yeaaaah okay, even if he got out of the car and gave me a so-called 'fair fight', he would cream me. He's got to be at least three feet taller and one thousand pounds heavier than me. So I did the only thing in my power that was reasonable.

"Peach is in the castle, take a left at the forest and you'll be there in no time. Go kidnap her as usual, I've got more Rawk to absorb."

What? It's not like I can _do_ anything against him! I may be spunky but I'm not stupid. If I manage to anger him, he could take me out without any trouble!

And I _do _enjoy living thank you.

A spreading grin, "Who said anything about kidnapping _Peach_?"

I blinked and looked up.

"…Huh?"

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><p>Alice: Well there's the first chapter! Read and Review Please! ^_^<p> 


	2. The Beast

Alice: Hiya! And welcome to the second chapter! We got a review! Woo! I hope to receive more in the future because I love, love, love reviews! Also they help me know what you're thinking about the story!

Ultrra: Lol and in NO way do you sound desperate at all Alice…

Alice: I hope everyone noticed a couple of things about last chapter! One, I've kind of combined the older Daisy with the newer Daisy

Ultrra:…I truly hope you explain yourself, because even I'm confused by that statement, and I've been helping you with this story.

Alice: I mean that on Nintendo 64 Daisy used to be tan with long hair, and now on the wii she's pale, with round child-like eyes and shoulder length hair.

Ultrra:…Should have said that from the beginning so everyone isn't so confused.

Alice: AHEM, so since she's a desert princess, I figured Nintendo had the right idea with making her have a tan and it was also another way to tell her and Peach apart. So in this story she looks like her 'wii' self but with her Nintendo 64 tan. Also her personality is a combination as well.

Ultrra: Aaaand yet again I'm confused.

Alice: The Daisy of Nintendo 64 was clumsy and the wii just is confident, and straight kick ass, so it's a combination of both.

Ultrra: So then the Daisy in this story kicks ass, but sometimes fails because she will trip—because she's clumsy-and miss the ass she was supposed to have kicked?

Alice:…

Ultrra:…What?

Alice: So anyways, you guys go ahead and enjoy the story! ^_^

Ultrra: You didn't think what I said was clever?

Alice: Honestly? No not really…Anyways, read and review okay? ;D

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"Who said anything about finding Peach?"<p>

I stared at him incredulously, "_What_?"

The massive koopa king leaned over, letting his beefy elbows rest firmly on the rim of his clown car. As he grinned, he crossed his arms and arched an eyebrow, "So are you gonna come willingly or—"

"Or?"

"—Act like an idiot and try to flee?"

I blinked, too stunned to even think of a smart-ass response. Okay, hold on now. I had to double check and look around to see who he was talking to here. If those red things in his face were indeed his eyes then I'd say he was looking at me.

"…You talkin' to me?" Ah I should have added a mafia accent here.

This received a dry smile, "Noooo, I'm talking to the invisible girl behind you. The one who actually has a brain."

I felt my temper flare dangerously as my eye twitched; _what a big, scaly jerk..._

"You," I pointed at him, "want to take _me?_" Then hiked a thumb at myself, "You know I'm not Peach right?"

His grin twisted maliciously, "I'm _positive _you're the princess I want. I'm taking you like it or not, Sweetie."

_Sweetie?_

Okay then, so he wants to kidnap me. This guy's in for a surprise. He's used to kidnapping Peach but he's going to learn the hard way I'm not going to stand around and cry for help. I, Princess Daisy of Sarasaland, am going to give him a Sarasaland ass-kicking!

I stood up, trying to put on a face braver than I felt by a mile. He was _King Bowser_, the legendary demon king imbued with blazing red eyes, a sinful smile of sharp fangs and a towering, hulking form. For a change I was glad to be wearing my long gown; it hid my shaking knees.

"You wanna kidnap me huh? Well then fire-breath! You've got another damn thing coming to you!" I even pointed at him heroically, "If you think I'm not gonna put up a fight then you're wrong buddy!"

With a war cry—I tried to ignore Bowser 's condescending grin—I chucked the magazine at the koopa as hard as I could, picked up my dress and tailed it out of there. With each step I took, racing through the green meadow, my heart pounded against my sternum wildly; _this is crazy_! What is Bowser doing going after me?! Doesn't he have some kind of pact with the Mushroom Kingdom to only kidnap their pretty princess?!

A reverberating deep chuckle suffused and seconds later the loud whirling of the clown car's propellers roared to life. A strong gale nearly knocked me off of my feet but I stumbled, continuing on.

Oh crap, _oh crap_ he was coming after me!

Seriously why is he chasing me? What does he want? And why do heels suck _goombas_ to run in?! A looming, horned shadow swallowed up my position precariously as the whirling of the clown car's propellers became deafening.

As I looked over my shoulder, Bowser hung out of the tilted clown car, grinning with an ominous outstretched arm. His sharp claws were moments away from touching me and no matter how hard I ran, I could not escape him. I screamed angrily as I realized the inevitable: I was about to be kidnapped.

"I can't believe this is happening to meeee-_ahhh_!"

In a desperate attempt for escape, I dove for the ground but a strong arm wrapped around my middle and effortlessly hoisted me into the air. The next thing I knew, I'm caught. A cold surge of panic flared like a burst of lightning; I'm hanging in the air, being ripped away from my family and friends by a monstrous king.

"P-Put me down!" I screamed.

"Really?" he replied with a sarcastic humor, "That's a _long _fall, Princess."

I was powerless, watching as the ground gradually disappeared and became further away. A deluge of despair flooded my being as the Mushroom Kingdom palace became a tiny dot on the green horizon.

I screamed, struggling and kicking as Bowser hauled me into the jowls of the clown car. A vituperate blend of fear and ire roiled in the pit of my stomach; _this was all that selfish monster's fault._ I growled, smacking any part of him I could with my fists. Maybe if I hit him enough he'd decide I wasn't worth the struggle. But he glowered with amusement.

"Do they teach all you girls to do this in female school or something?" He laughed, grinning darkly, " 'If kidnapped, swing away pathetically at him.' Stars it's so _cute_."

"Let me go you bastard!" I roared.

In the midst of the struggle I kicked, managing to pull off a roundhouse. I hoped to crack him hard in the jaw but I was nowhere near hitting him. My shoe flew off, dropping into the abyss of clouds.

He laughed again and the second he set me down to take control of the yolk, I started to wail on him, pounding my fists against his shell. But no matter how hard I beat my fists against his hard shell, it did nothing. In fact he even shot a sly grin my way.

"How dare you try and take me against my will!" I growled and with each word I punched his scaly hide, "Here comes the Sarasaland ass-kicking you big, overgrown turtle!"

With a roar I threw a fist into his carapace; in my mind I'm beating the hell out of him! Oh yeah I'm channeling my inner Super Mario! I was throwing lightning fast punches and breaking his bones! But since Bowser's not even flinching from the _grand_, powerful Sarasaland ass-kicking, I'm pretty sure my 'attacks' are just plain pathetic.

In fact is he even _smirking_!?

Ugh! Dammit! For pride's sake I hope I really don't look pathetic. _I probably do. _The Koopa jerk chuckled as he continued to steer, "Is this _the_ 'Sarasaland ass-kicking?' Hmm?"

"YOU JERK! LET ME GO NOW OR I'LL BEAT YOU SENSELESS!"

As I continued to beat my fists against his shell, he turned and raised an eyebrow. He smirked, "Aw that's _real _cute. Is that supposed to hurt princess?"

Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm going to start hating that smirk of his. I blushed, crossed my arms and wished him to, "Eat a turnip and digest it wrong!"

Bowser threw his head back in obnoxious laughter and I blinked when his face appeared a few inches from my own. I raised both eyebrows, stumbling back a bit. What the hell!? Personal boundaries exist for a reason!

"Only if _you _spoon-feed it to me," he grinned as he flicked my chin with a claw.

I gaped at him.

He winked.

Oh HELL NO!

I spluttered angrily as I threw a tantrum; yes I'm ashamed to admit he managed to force me back to a time when I was four. I was red-faced, shouting, cursing and jumping up and down like a lunatic while waving my hands. How dare he?! How dare that big, overgrown, scaly turtle _touch_ me!

_He touched me!_

"Don't touch me!" I snapped, face still red from anger.

"I'll do whatever the hell I want thank you very much," he was still grinning, something told me he wasn't taking this seriously.

"I-If you try that ever again! I'll—!"

"What?" he huffed, "You'll give me another 'Sarasaland ass-kicking'?"

"Version 2.0 next time!" I hissed through my teeth. Bowser laughed softly, shaking his head. Why is he laughing at me!? The Sarasaland ass kicking is a lethal weapon!

I huffed angrily, mind still reeling. I had been kidnapped! I can't believe this is really happening! I had been kidnapped, stowed away and stuck with this gigantic goober. A giant goober who felt he could do and say as he pleases. I have to weigh my options, either A I could unleash the Sarasaland ass-kicking version 2.0 on this poor unsuspecting koopa, or B I could try to reason with him.

Option B it is.

I composed myself, straightening up my dress and pushing the bangs out of my face. I placed my hands on my hips and glared at him, "Alrighty, listen here Koopa King—"

Still smirking, "You'd better call me King Bowser."

"Alright then _King Bowser,_ I have a question to ask and you're going to answer me. Where are you taking me? You owe me that much."

"Are you simple or slow princess?" his grin seemed to grow as my eye twitched; jerk, "We're going to my castle."

"Castle! Castle!? W-Why? Why take me?" I frowned, "Don't you always kidnap Peach anyways?"

The slippery, smug expression dropped from his mug for a change. He looked contemplative, "Maybe I want to try something new, carrot top."

"That's strike one Bowser," I glowered; no one makes fun of my hair color and gets away with it.

Again he laughed.

I glared.

This was starting to become a cycle I see.

"Anymore of these 'questions'?" He grinned, shooting a look my way.

"Anymore of these questions!?" I mocked him, snarling; I couldn't think of anything good to say back.

He laughed _again_; glad I was such a good comedy act for him! There was nothing else to do; I wasn't going to talk to a kidnapping maniac so I stared at the scenery. The beautiful green landscape of the Mushroom kingdom slowly faded into the dark, dull colors of the Darklandian territories.

It was haunting how even the sky gradually morphed from a crystal blue to a shade of red, the color of fresh blood. The kingdom was nothing but dark landscape, volcanic soot and pools of bubbling red lava. The Sarasaland kingdom may not have been pretty and green like the Mushroom kingdom but it was far brighter and prettier than this place.

It felt like a tangible, cold cloud of depression descended upon me; the area was nothing but a void of dark, inky colors muddled into jagged, rocky terrain and dead valleys. I gazed past the sun, the giant star bleeding a rich red against the darkening horizon. Just peaking at the edge of the horizon was a grandiose, dark tower. I gasped in awe; it was the legendary Bowser's castle.

I had never been here before and all the stories Peach told me did it no justice. From a distance the keep was a jagged, dark silhouette against the bloody horizon. The closer we drew, the more daunting the castle became. It was made of slabs of dark stone and even from here I could see the gigantic draw bridge over the bubbling lava moat.

The castle's great spires and turrets pierced the blood-red sky and there was no missing the hideous, stone face of Bowser's castle. The large, stone koopa head looked absolutely hellish: its maw opened in a furious roar, eyes slanted with dangerous horns and sleek fangs.

And here I was stuck in the same vehicle that awful image was modeled after. Slowly, as to not attract his attention, I looked up at the evil king. Under the lava's red light he looked demonic. I didn't think it was even possible for him to look even more imposing.

His face held a twisted scowl and in the red wash of bubbling inferno it was as if his red irises disappeared completely. Now he looked even more like a monster. I don't think I could defend myself from this freak if he tried anything.

"Almost home," he turned his head and grinned darkly.

I backed away; I didn't want to be anywhere near that monster. His smile diminished at my evasive action. For a moment his gleeful expression morphed into irritation and he quickly snapped forward, steering the car. The rest of the way there he said nothing else, silently stewing.

We landed in a courtyard of his castle, equipped with a special landing pad for his clown car. I continued to look around the place, strangely fascinated by a culture that wasn't my own.

For a courtyard owned by a maniacal creep, this was a rather nice enclosure. If one ignored the grotesque statues of Bowser encompassing the yard, then this piazza could actually be pretty. It was far greener than I thought and there were even a beautiful array of blooming red and pink flowers around; it looked like a garden.

"Welcome back, Lord Bowser," a chorus of voices rang out.

Bowser grumbled something like a, "Yeah, whatever."

I gasped as a muscled arm wrapped around my waist and hoisted me out of the clown car. He chucked me effortlessly over his shoulder—without hitting his spines—and began to stroll towards his castle in an easy gait. With a growl I began to throw my fists into whatever part of his body I could hit.

"H-Hey stop! You kidnapping bastard! I can walk on my own two legs! You let go of me now!"

A throaty chuckle rumbled through his shell, "You know, for a straight-laced princess you have a pretty dirty mouth, lady."

"Oh?" I glared at the back of his head, "And I'm _so _sure the King of all Koopas has perfectly clean language!"

"Hn."

Yet again it was annoying to see Bowser wasn't even phased by my attacks. In fact I think he was purposefully ignoring them, "Hmm. And if I do let you go, you're not gonna try to make a break for it?"

I froze. Was King Bowser _really_ going to just let me go? Even in the face of a bold lie!? Just to put my theory to work, I fixed my face into the most innocent expression. With a practiced superficiality I tried to sound convincingly sweet, "No. I will not run away."

"Hmm." He sharpened his stare, glaring hard at my face and for a moment I trembled, curling away from such a hostile visage.

It wasn't too soon when he finally released a soft chuff and decided he believed my tale. I was unbolstered from his arms and set onto my two feet. The moment he turned his back, I would run like hell. I make be slow in heels, well in one stiletto anyways but I know I can still outrun him.

The stars must have aligned perfectly because he turned his back to me and began to tromp away "Follow—"

"Haha! Suuuuuuuucker!"

I tore past and ran straight into the castle. I heard a disgruntled growl as I raced into the dingy fortress. Now I was aware running straight into Bowser's castle is like going from the pan and into the fire, but seriously what else could I do?!

He probably had thousands of drone soldiers within his palace but I honestly thought that it was better to be in the hands of his lackeys than before their tyrannical king any day.

Just as I was heading up a flight of stairs, I heard the clucking of approaching koopas and darted around a corner. I stayed dead silent as the three koopa troopas waddled past. I held my breath until I was sure they disappeared completely from sight.

I stuck my head from my scanty hideaway and peered in both directions; okay so now where to go? Maybe if I hide in one of the rooms I could elude him long enough and make a break for it? I chuckled dubiously at my lame plan for escape; and then what? Attempt to highjack his flying copter clown thingamabob? Just as I took another step, the floor opened below me and I fell into a hole.

I was falling, racing down a chute in a pitch-black tunnel. I couldn't see a damn thing and even if this chute wasn't completely dark, my billowing dress fluttered obstructively into my vision. The ride ended abruptly and spat me out roughly on my rear. I groaned, rubbing my sore tush. Why, I was inside of a cage.

Aw _crap_.

I rose to my feet, straightening out my dress and petticoats as I tried to gain my bearings. Still reeling from the ride, I grabbed the bars to center my gravity. So here I am trapped in a dark cellar belonging to King Bowser. It was obvious what I had to do.

I have to get the heck out of here before the king realized his cells were holding a Sarasalandian princess! I shuddered at the thought of being found and completely at the mercy of the maniacal tyrant king.

The stunt I pulled had to really piss him off.

Uttering curses under my breath, I tugged and pulled at the cage's bars but nothing happened; no budging or breaking. I took a few steps back and glared at these said evil bars. How could I get out of here...?

I remember reading a Glitzville interview with Rawk Hawk. He stated the strongest part of a woman's body are her legs. _Maybe I can kick this place down. _Gathering my strength, I took a calming inhalation and with a mighty roar I kicked the bars with all my might…

"For Sarasaland!" I yelled.

…And nearly broke my foot in the process. I hopped around on one foot cursing in Sarasalandian, as a sudden flare of lights sparkled to life.

No it wasn't electricity that lit the dank dungeon but firelight. Several torches had been lit simultaneously and millions of tiny critters skittered, disappearing into crevices just as fast as the light had appeared.

I paled wondering just what other little vermin were living in this dank chamber. With the limited light and the dank atmosphere who knows what kind of vermin could be living down here…

Did King Bowser keep dead prisoners here? Were the dead enemies of the King Koopa moldering down here, rotting away to nothing, or were rats feasting on their carcasses?

Holy Stars were the rats going to eat me?! Were the giant, fat rats going to eat me away too until I was nothing but a skeleton in a yellow princess dress?! Just as I felt my mind being overrun with anxiety and dread, I began to claw at the cage desperately. I pulled and kicked, but the bars were not moving.

There could be rats down here! Big, fat mutant rats that have been feasting on the brains of prisoners and what if they suddenly developed a taste for princess!?

I have to get out of here!

I sent one last resolute kick at the bar and halted, realizing there was a dark humanoid silhouette. Stars, there is a person standing maybe less than ten feet away from me? I gulped, slowing drinking in the unknown visage; tall, monstrously so and he—I think it's a guy—was huge. I slowly lifted my leg in preparation for kicking the heck out of this creep.

Just as I planned to shove my leg—heel more specifically—into the silhouette's kneecap, the person breathed a roll of orange fire onto a torch and the room was bright.

The mystery was solved as the koopa king handed the torch over to a minion. Staring at me was Bowser and two magikoopa. The king grinned triumphantly, arms crossed and a feral sneer present.

To preserve whatever kind of dignity I had left in front of him, I slowly placed my foot down and straightened out my dress. With visibility present, I glanced around the dank room. There were no skeletons or molding bodies or fat-giant rats eating anyone. Hmm, perhaps I had let my imagination get the best of me a bit?

Only a little bit.

This room was nothing but a really damp dungeon and I was safe. Well, as safe as I could be with King Bowser glaring down at me.

"Well, well, well," with each passing second Bowser's sneer became more pronounced, "Look what we've got here Kammy, Kamek."

Both the magikoopas wore wizard cloaks and looked nearly identical in my opinion. However Kammy's cloak was made of satin and held a deep shade of violet whereas Kamek's cloak and wizard hat was a deep indigo.

Also not to mention Kamek was clearly male and Kammy was female; her feminine powder-white hair and dangling earrings hinted at her gender.

He turned to this 'Kammy,' and sighed, "See _this_ is why King Bowser can't be nice. I let her go for one second and then what does the warrior princess do? She turns to run off…Peach listened to whatever I said."

"Well your majesty," Kammy fixed her glasses, "Not every human girl is alike. Granted Princess Daisy and Princess Peach share the same blood, yet they are far different in both appearances and personality. Princess Peach is more docile whereas Princess Daisy is…uh…_unkempt_."

" 'Unkempt'!" I hissed, insulted this woman would even pass a flash judgment on me, "You take that back you flying snail!"

I was startled when Bowser and the other magikoopa bust out into laughter, pointing at Kammy, "Did you hear that! She called you a snail!"

Kammy kept a straight face although it was obvious she was miffed, "…Yes your evilness I heard her just _fine_."

She suddenly spun around and snapped at the other Magikoopa, "And just what are _you_ laughing about you old crone?! I'm talking to you Kamek!"

Although a smirk was present upon his face, 'Kamek' I guess, chuckled to himself, "Oh nothing."

Chuckling, Bowser turned to look at me, "So Daisy—"

"_Princess_ Daisy," I crossed my arms mirroring his stance, "You see this crown on my head? It's there for a reason."

"Yeah, so Daisy," he smirked at my miffed expression, "So you're probably wondering why I brought you here."

I laughed derisively, "Yeah that would be actually _really _nice to know."

"Well, a couple of my counselors suggested the Darklands should start trying to improve relations with the other kingdoms. You know, to build potential alliances and crap like that."

Bowser stomped over until he was a breadth away from me. I stared up at him in a mixture of both awe and revolt. He was a beast, nearly the devil himself with his long pearl horns and a cruel visage. He was imposing and at least three feet taller. His red eyes burned wildly like inferno. I glanced at his biceps and inaudibly swallowed a gulp.

His arms were friggin' ridiculous! He was _ripped. _He arched an eyebrow and followed my line of vision, to his huge arms. He grinned and raised a bicep and flexed, "Like what you see Princess?"

I gaped at him; well I didn't expect that. This time he flexed both arms and I sat back stunned; like seriously what in the world is he _doing?!_ Kamek and Kammy exchanged looks as they stared at their king. Kammy cleared her throat, "Sire? Before you get…_distracted_, could you perhaps tell the Princess why she is here?"

Bowser paused, halting in the middle of a flex and grinned at Kammy, "I was only giving her a taste of eye candy."

Yet again I stared at him incredulously; did he _really_ just refer to himself as eye candy?! He chuckled to himself and crossed his arms yet again. Call me crazy, but I think this time he was _still _flexing even with his arms crossed, "I brought you here Princess because I wanted us to get to know each other and become…_friends_."

He looked over at Kammy, "…Did I say that word correctly? _Friends_?"

"Yes your nastiness, you said it superbly," Kammy gleamed with pride; maybe she taught him that word? Who knows?

While his advisers were beaming, praising him over a menial task like pronouncing such a simple word well, I was pondering. So King Bowser kidnapped me all because he wanted to be my friend!?

Was he crazy or just severely disillusioned!?

"Wait, let me get this straight," I glared at him incredulously, "You want to be friends, so you come and kidnap me, and then you stick me in a cage?!"

I heard someone clear their throat and I could have sworn that Kamek guy had softly uttered, "She has a good point your cruelty." But Kammy frowned and all but elbowed the Holy Stars out of him.

"Well _technically_ if you hadn't been snooping around my castle," he grinned lopsidedly, eyes narrowing wickedly, "then you wouldn't be in here. You yourself triggered that trap door."

"Okay, I'll admit to that one," I said softly, "But still! You kidnap me! _To be my friend_!?"

"Think about it," Bowser's smirk was ever present on his face, "If I came knocking on the door of Sarasaland's castle would your guards _really_ let me in?"

Somehow in his twisted logic, Bowser did have a point. If we ever saw an eight-foot tall koopa approaching our gates, all hell would break loose. It would probably lead to the next war!

"Then follow policy like everyone else and send delegates and envoys to other kingdoms so we can see you're not as evil as we think you are."

"An envoy huh," he rubbed his chin in thought, eyebrow arched slightly, "Well then consider it done, princess."

I blinked in disbelief; did I really just change the king of koopas' mind like that?! It seemed too simple really. In fact he was smiling at me as if he knew something that I didn't.

Hmm.

"You see Princess, I've considered your proposal and I think it's a brilliant idea," he was still grinning, eyes twinkling, "I will accept your proposal."

"Well that's great King Bowser, now we ca—"

_"You're_ going to be a representative from Sarasaland," his smile transformed into something downright malicious, "You're going to convince me to become an ally for your kingdom."

I choked, "_What!"_

He chuckled darkly, eyes narrowed, "You must convince me Sarasaland is in need of my kingdom's aid. If you succeed and prove your kingdom to be a valuable asset, then you'll have the Darklands as a full time ally."

"Think of it princess," Kammy hovered beside me, "Sarasaland could potentially be backed by _the _strongest military a kingdom has."

"Also," Kamek appeared on my other side, "Our economy is constantly booming. We'd be willing to help our new allies with commerce, trade, starting new business and exchanging knowledge. We can help increase an ally's economy as well. Think about the benefits princess."

Bowser laughed, "Better yet, think about the detriments! If you show me that Sarasaland is a sucky ally, then I'll come over there and rip your kingdom apart!"

He moved his face closer to mine and grinned demonically, "I'll clear my agenda and I will destroy your kingdom…_personally_."

I grimaced; the words of the ultimatum still bouncing around my head. I had to be a delegate for Sarasaland and convince King Bowser to become an ally of ours? This was not what I had in mind when I mentioned sending a delegate. If I had known he meant for _me _to do the job, then I wouldn't have said anything.

I chewed my lip in thought; an unprincessly action yes but it helped me organize my thoughts. If I could in fact convince Bowser that his kingdom would benefit from an alliance with Sarasaland then my kingdom would have an extremely powerful ally. It could help so much!

A stronger economy could mean new irrigation systems to fight against droughts and famines, or better supplies for battling against sand storms. But if I fail, then I could start a war with the King of all Koopas.

For a terrifying moment I could picture Bowser, and his menacing army storming through my kingdom. Fires would rage with the hellish fury of the Darklandians, devouring buildings and homes as the king left nothing but death, blood and destruction in his wake. I shivered; I just couldn't let that happen. And everyone who had half a brain knew that going to war against the Darklands was as good as signing your own death warrant with your blood as the ink.

As a ten-year old girl, I could remember learning about the koopa war of 1315 in a history lesson, the most recent war in history where the Darklands were involved in a battle against the now ancient Silverlands civilization.

The ruler of the Silverlands had all but infuriated the koopa king of the era, and with the building tensions, war broke out between the kingdoms. That war had been a completely one-sided, bloody mortal combat. The soldiers of the Darklands had all but easily mauled the Silverlands defenses apart and destroyed the said kingdom swiftly and ruthlessly.

That war was recorded as the most violent, vicious battles that had been fought in our history. The complete civilization was eradicated and the koopa had left a long trail of nothing but blood, fire, death and destruction in their wake.

Ever since that war's place in history, all monarchs more than feared the Darklands. While many centuries had gone by since that bloodfest, that moment in history was more than freshly ingrained in the back of every ruler's mind.

"So, will you act as an envoy princess?" Bowser arched an eyebrow, his fire-breathing grin present.

"Well _duh_!" I hissed.

His smile began to fade and I coughed, "I-I mean of course King Bowser."

He grinned, "Good!"

I jumped back as he reached forward and snapped off a section of the cage effortlessly. I gasped, stunned at how strong he was. He looked at me and grinned, "What, didn't think I was comin' for ya did you?"

"No! I'm not scared of you," I hissed.

Just as I went to walk past him, he stepped in the middle of the broken cage. He glared down at me but still managed to smile, "Is that _so_?"

He slowly lowered his head until his face was inches away from mine. I gulped, trying not to shiver too badly in front of him. If he wanted to hurt me, then he'd really have no problems doing so.

I narrowed my eyes and glared right back at him. He chuckled, red eyes blazing, "Hmm, brave little cookie eh? You look someone in the eye even when you're quaking in your boots."

"I-I," I swallowed, "I'm not afraid of you!"

"Heh," He stepped away and snorted smoke through his nostrils, "You don't need to fear me princess, fear stinks on you. It's saturating your natural scent."

I blinked, "You can _smell _fear?"

He chuckled, "I can even taste it if it's potent enough. Now stop being afraid of me. Fear _really_ smells terrible on you. It's nearly nauseating really."

He looked at me a bit closer and smirked, "On another note, you look awful princess. Let's get you cleaned up a bit."

Just as he turned to leave I frowned. I ran a harried hand through my hair and to my horror felt how frizzed and tangled it was. For the King of Koopas to comment on my appearance, I must have looked terrible. My dress was filthy and torn, I was missing one of my shoes, my right glove was ripped and dirty.

I huffed, knowing there was nothing I could do to fix my appalling appearance. I stepped out of the cage and followed him. While I glared at him, mainly for the nerve of his commentary on my appearance, I stared at the back of his shell and shivered. All those spikes and spines, how in the world has he not accidentally taken an eye out?

I looked at his massive clawed hands, the spiked-studded arm and wrist bracers and shuddered. What would happen if I failed as an envoy? Would he shred me to pieces with those razor sharp claws? Bowser suddenly clenched his fists together, hard enough that his knuckles popped audibly.

His sudden halt forced me to stop, least I run into those serious looking spines on his shell. I looked up at the back of his head curiously; his entire demeanor seemed to have changed. Was he angry?

"I thought I _told_ you to stop with the fear thing," he growled, I swore that his red mane stuck up a bit more than usual, "I said I wouldn't hurt you."

For a moment there was a silent standoff between us. He glared down as me, with a curious roll of smoke trailing from his left nostril and I stared back at him wordlessly, confused about why he was angry.

With a snort of smoke, he turned and began to continue stomping twice as hard as before. I blinked, still in a stupor over his sudden mood change. For the first time he seemed genuinely upset and Bowser being angry meant he was one step closer to launching a full-out war upon Sarasaland.

_Crap._

With the safety of my kingdom at stake, I decided I'd have to put my ego aside and appeal to Bowser's maniacal ego. I gulped and picked up my tattered dress and ran until I was walking by his side. When I settled beside him he cut a rather sharp sideways look my way. He still looked relatively miffed so I decided to clear that up as soon as possible.

"Look, m-maybe I'm still kind of shaky from being kidnapped by—"

_By a big, scary, evil-looking koopa who just so happens to be a dictator. This said koopa can also breathe fire, and smash his way through concrete as easily as one would skip through a grassy meadow._

"By what?" he said gruffly, his humor still gone.

"I-I meant that maybe if I got to know you a bit better, then I wouldn't be scared," my voice barely came out louder than a whisper

He halted for a second time and I stopped, glancing up at him. Bowser looked at me, his face held in astonishment and I watched as his features settled into a large grin, "A chance to get to know me better hmm? Why princess I think that's quite a good idea."

I beamed weakly, both glad and exasperated; glad in the sense I had appeased his ego and exasperated at the fact of having to spend more time with this selfish monster.

"Tonight you and I will have a nice dinner," as he grinned I couldn't help but notice his massive fangs, "and there we can chat, get to learn more about each other and our kingdoms…and do other boring crap that goes on at dinner."

I actually laughed at his frankness and his grin stretched, "That sounds good King Bowser."

"Great!" he genuinely looked pleased and I tried to ignore how his tail actually wagged, thumping against the floor loudly.

I thought it was cute, but I wasn't going to tell him that and bruise his male ego. Wait, do koopas actually have male egos or is that just reserved for human males?

"Well before dinner we'll have to have you freshen up a bit Princess."

I blushed, crossing my arms indignantly, "…Do I really look that bad?"

One edge of his mouth curved upward in a sly smirk, "Heh, I have someone who would be more than willing to help you prepare for tonight's events," with two snaps of his fingers, Kammy reappeared in a splatter of primary-colored shapes.

I jumped back in shock, "Whoooa!"

Both Bowser and Kammy looked at me skeptically. I blushed, feeling like an idiot, "W-what? I've never seen magic before…"

King Bowser shook his head and chuckled, "Poor kingdoms, always amazed by the most basic stuff. Anyways, Kammy could you see to it that the _fashionista _will take care of the princess? We will have a dinner together to cement our new…_friendship_."

"Well met your majesty! You said the word perfectly! I have in fact already sent the fashionista to Miss Daisy's guestroom."

I frowned, "Guestroom? Excuse me, but how long am I staying here?"

I spun around to find the head koopa, and he was already heading down another hall into who knows where.

"H-Hey! King Bowser!"

He spun to face me, looking far too amused, "Yes princess?"

"How long are you planning on keeping me here? I've got a life you know!"

Bowser grinned wickedly, "Long enough to convince me I shouldn't blow your kingdom to hell."

"…So where's my room?"

Bowser laughed as Kammy grinned, "Please follow me your highness. His Lordship will leave us now, he has many imperative matters to oversee."

Kammy led me to a hall with a shimmering silvery door. With a swipe of her wand the door opened gingerly and I stepped in to see a breath-taking suite. The stone chamber was decorated and painted a soft cream with overly feminine yellow lace drapes and the large bed was dressed in a lacy yellow quilt.

The room smelled strongly floral and was filled with what looked like an indoor garden bursting with a pasture of tall daisies. I looked around at the lavish settings and was honestly amazed; there was a large jacuzzi bath tub with gorgeous golden nozzles and black marble furnishings. Even the stone tiles of the room where inscribed with a delicate daisy insignia.

This room was nearly twice as large as my own at the Sarasaland palace and probably twice as glamorous. Granted my room at home was huge, but this room was amazing! It was like a miniature ballroom! I spun to face Kammy who was pretending that she wasn't watching my reaction.

Hmm everything in this room was yellow, cream, or orange; would I be wrong in guessing Bowser had planned this kidnapping thing far in advance? It's too much of a coincidence a room is prepared in my 'favorite colors'. Sarasaland protocol makes the royals dress in golds and oranges to represent the desert.

"Is the room up to your standards princess?" She asked coolly.

"Yes it's rather nice actually." I eyed the indoor garden with the bright and fragrant flowers. I reached out and touched the petals.

"Oh," she sounded disappointed.

"What's wrong…?"

"Well we here in the Darklands don't do 'nice.' 'Nice' would be the equivalent of your 'okay,' and we don't do 'okay' here," she sniffed indignantly.

"Oh, then it's ah…superb?" I said hesitantly.

"That's a bit better I suppose. We hope you will enjoy your stay here, Princess Daisy. Your facilities include a jet-hot tub, an indoor garden and sunroof, and your own personal tanning booth."

I laughed, "Why do I need a tan? Look at me, I'm a desert princess."

"Well…Erm yes, but we thought young ladies your age liked to tan and—_Ahem_. Well the fashionista should be coming in in any second now and…"

The doors to my room snapped open and in popped a girl koopa? She wore a large pink bow, red lipstick and matching cotton-candy pink heels. She switched her hips as she walked in with a haughty expression on her pretty face. She looked around the room and blinked when her vision fell upon me.

"Kammy," she strolled towards me, "Is this my latest project?"

"Project?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Yes your gracefulness," Kammy grinned, speaking to the girl koopa instead of me, "You have several hours to make her presentable before dinner."

"My goodness, you're like such a mess," she crooned, frowning a bit and even scrunching up her nose in disdain.

"Hey, you try to look good getting kidnapped," I hissed defensively; did I really look _that_ bad?

"Hmm," the girl koopa walked around me in a circle, eyes narrowed as she studied me, "But despite the apparent mess you are, you've got a pretty decent face, nice and heart-shaped. A nice body…from what I can see in that abomination dress."

She stopped when she was in front of me and grinned impishly; somehow it was through her mischievous expression that I saw Bowser's features in her pretty face, "I'm Wendy Koopa, crown princess of the Darklands by the way and fashionista extradonaire!"

"Yeah? Well I'm Princess Daisy of the Sarasaland kingdom. Your dad is trying to decide whether or not he wants to destroy my kingdom," I said to her flatly.

I expected a bit of outrage or indignation at hearing her father's evil plans for my kingdom, but if anything she looked amused.

What was _with_ these koopas?

Wendy chuckled, "Oh nonsense, daddy's just being silly. He's only kidnapped two princesses ever and he only kidnaps princesses when he's—"

Kammy cleared her throat suddenly and conveniently in my opinion. Wendy grinned as she purposely sidetracked, "-I've been studying fashion at Madame Fifi's all girls academy and let me tell you Daisy, oh may I call you Dai? It would be so _magnifique_!"

"Sure, only if I can call you Wendy," I shrugged; titles always made me cringe. Even being called 'princess' made me think that everyone saw me as a title instead of a person.

"Deal! Soooo," she scooted closer to me; wow these koopas really didn't know the definition of 'personal space', "Your skin is a rich tan, a refreshing change from Peach's pasty pop complexion."

"With her we can only really do pinks and silvers, nothing like what we can do with yours. So I'm thinking gold or a cool blue would be better suited for your complexion than that _blah_ yellow. My it like really washes you out."

"Uh…okay." I scratched my head.

Wendy scrunched up her nose, "Don't do that. Like princesses do not scratch their heads. It's so manly. So unwomanly."

I stopped, "But my head itches. What am I supposed to do? Sit here and—"

"Well, it's nice to finally have a girlfriend to talk to!" she squealed happily, "Besides Kammy, there's nothing but _boys _here."

I laughed, "How many brothers do you have?"

She looked annoyed, "Count it, seven! And all of them are smelly, and ugly!"

"Wow, you must be tough to survive all of them!" I've always wanted another sibling, preferably a little brother. Someone who I could be rough with and play sports with together.

"Koopas are always tough," she harrumphed, "but it's so hard being beautiful with seven brothers around who constantly are idiots!"

I laughed; so this girly girl had seven brothers huh? That meant that as the only girl in the family she had to be tough to get her voice heard. Maybe there was more to her than the superficial, vain little koopa girl I saw before me. She probably saw me as a Peach replacement and I saw her as a brat; it worked.

"So we don't have much time to waste Dai. We've got to make you stunning before dinner time and that's only fourteen hours away!"

"Um," I raised an eyebrow, "That's plenty of time..."

"NONSENSE!" then that sweet smile of hers was back on her face, "Now let's go. Oh and Kammy? Could we take the carriage into town? The truly elegant one with the pearl finish?"

Kammy inclined her head at the directive, "Oh course your loveliness."

Just as I went to leave, I saw Wendy narrow her eyes at me.

"Wait!" Wendy stepped in front of me, "you don't like _honestly_ think I'm going to let you go out in public looking like that!"

Chuckling I shrugged noncommittally and Wendy hissed at my nonchalance, "Tomboy of the century or not you're going to the mall looking like a wonder. I'm going to have this dress washed and pressed and I'll personally see to it that I will glam it up a bit. Maybe move the hemline to knee-length and off the princess sleeves oh and I'll be sure to get rid of those ghastly panniers. Stars know that they were wretched when they came out a century ago and they're still hideous on gowns today."

I watched as Wendy mumbled to herself, eyes glazed as she murmured about the alterations she was going to make to my gown. While she was continuing to droll on about whether or not to add a petticoat, I decided to interrupt her trance.

"Well then while you're still correcting my 'awful' appearance, I should tell you that as of right now I only have one heel."

Wendy's blue eyes went from being opaque to lucid like the waters of Delfino island within seconds. She frowned, "And like how pray tell did you manage to lose a shoe?"

"This time I couldn't hide my laughter at her disgruntlement, "I was trying to kick your dad and my shoe came off!"

"Merciful Stars in Star Haven you're such a boy," she sighed, "Well, you'll be my biggest success when I change you into a woman worthy of your floral name. But first things first. Out of the dress princess and into that robe. I've got work to do."

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><p>Alice: Please Read and Review! Much love everyone!<p> 


	3. Yellow: Dinner with the King

_Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom._

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"Like do you think it's better to be loved or envied?" Wendy had asked, although truthfully the longer I sit here, the more I begin to think she's really talking <em>at <em>me, "Because my friend Koopie Krissy thinks it's waaaay better to be loved, but being envied always feels kinda good you know? Like I remember on my eleventh birthday, King Daddy bought me a—"

As Wendy continued to yap and jabber at the speed of sound, she peered at herself in a powder-pink compact. She worked tirelessly, fixing her already immaculate makeup. I sighed heavily, hoping to tune out anymore of her idle chatter. She continued to spew on and on about any and everything ranging from trends in the Darklands and even having a scope wide enough to talk about boys.

Maybe this wouldn't be so annoying if every now and then she stopped to give my ears a rest. A person could only take so much of her annoying sugary-cute falsetto. Yeah so _this_ basically summed up the entire carriage ride; her conversations flowed effortlessly from one topic into the next.

After she touched-up the last strokes of a shimmering eyeshadow, she blew a kiss to her reflection and placed the compact into her designer bag. Stars, she was even more high maintenance than Peach! And Peach was the type of woman who wouldn't want to go outside and be 'seen' in public if her hair didn't curl a certain way. My cousin may have been beautiful, smart, and cheerful, but she was _super_ vain.

Wendy smiled, suddenly giving me her undivided attention; that made me worry a bit, "So, how do you like your new dress?"

I squirmed a bit, "It's…alright."

Alright my _ass_!

Just as promised Wendy had my gown cleaned and pressed to brand-new perfection. She altered my once tattered ball gown into a fashionable mini dress. I tugged at my uncomfortably short hemline which was now more appropriate as a cocktail dress.

It was long enough to barely end at my knees and that meant a lot of tan leg was exposed; if father saw me wearing this dress, he would probably be very displeased with how immodest this dress was. Just as I was tugging the lacy hemline a bit lower, a manicured claw slapped impatiently at my hand.

"Quit squirming around," She hissed, "You look just fine in your dress, in fact I think you look like wonderful. Now stop."

"Thanks" I spoke softly; still unused to having legs bared. Playing sports was one thing but having bare legs and uncovered hands for any other reason was considered completely indecent.

"I'm not being nice," Wendy smirked, "Like, I don't give out compliments for the sake of being _kind. _You look good."

"I'm just not used to wearing skirts this short," I huffed as I jiggled my leg in an impatient cadence, "The last time I did was during the Mario Tennis tourney. All Peach's fault by the way. Oh! And my skirt was so short, I could only concentrate on not flashing the crowd."

Wendy arched an eyebrow ridge, amusement sparkling in her baby blues, "Well just for your information Dai, I can _totally_ see up your skirt right now. Polka-dot panties hmm? Maybe there is some hope for you after all, miss tomboy."

As my face glowed red with blush, Wendy laughed a bit louder. Huffing, I uncrossed my legs and hurriedly tugged down the hemline of my dress, "…See!? _That's_ why I can't wear skirts."

"Oh settle down," Wendy tittered, eyes aglow with amusement, "We're like, both ladies here right? There's no need to be embarrassed."

"Yeah…I guess," I grumbled under my breath.

"So I wonder why King Daddy decided to kidnap_ you_ instead of Princess Peach. You're certainly boyish, a bit brash, and rough around the edges," Wendy asked herself, stroking her chin in thought, "Oh Stars, I know why. I can't believe Daddy acts so drastically or someone he—"

I shrugged one shoulder apathetically, "I don't know Wendy. Why would Bowser kidnap me instead of my cousin? She seems to be the more important, famous princess. Her kingdom has far more clout and she's far prettier."

"Ugh I know why. Gosh, King Daddy really needs to work on his skills with—" halting mid statement, Wendy's jewel-blue eyes sharpened, "Hmm…is that how you really feel? That princess pink freak is the 'real' princess? We ought to-"

"Princess! We've arrived," the Koopa coachdriver bellowed.

"Oh splendid!" Wendy happily clapped her claws together, "Well let's hurry up and get moving Dai! We've got so much to do in like so little time!"

The moment the carriage stopped moving, Wendy grabbed my arm and all but dragged me out into the mall. I couldn't help but laugh as someone half my height muscled me around; I guess Koopa strength is just something not to be trifled with.

Curses slipped out of my mouth as I stumbled after Wendy gracelessly in a new pair of shimmering orange stilletoes. They were a bit too tight, too glitzy and rhinestone-ish for my tastes but beggars can't be choosers right?

"Dai, welcome to the Great Bowser Mall of the Darklands!" Wendy boomed, grinning at me, "This place is like so amazing! King Daddy really out did himself with this mall. It's the top ranked mall of _all _kingdoms!"

And I couldn't have agreed more. The building was tall and wide as any conglomerate skyscraper but held all the wonder and glitz of an amusement park. It was larger and more awe-inspiring than the most upscale mall in the Mushroom kingdom.

As we approached, I couldn't help but gape around stupidly. There were attractions, soaring rides and roller coasters-a car flew by, going into a daring loop-and there were jumbo-sized Ferris wheels that towered like skyscrapers.

When we stepped through the main entrance, I felt as if we had entered the future. Escalators and elevators glowed in a rainbow wash of neon colors, and were so tall, nearly disappearing from sight and fading off into the distance.

I looked at all the electronic advertisements on ridiculously large, flashing monitors. The advertisements were bright, loud—rambunctiously so—and were over the top with color and explosions. Most of the advertising had a Bowser face or image somehow, which really was somehow…

Disturbing.

I mean there was an ad about buying facial cream and then out of nowhere, there was a fiery explosion!

What in the hell did an explosion and facial cream have to do with each other!?

A Koopa janitor suddenly zoomed past, wearing a jetpack as he managed the feat of flying and sweeping at the same time. I gaped after him incredulously; he was wearing a jetpack, a janitor of all people was wearing a jetpack?!

Then a flying—yes_ flying_—train traveled from one level of the mall to the next as Koopa citizens both boarded and disembarked in droves. As Wendy continued to tug me forward, pointing out several of her favorite shops on our way—I saw Koopas waiting in a long line for a rollercoaster ride.

This place was so amazing, at our biggest mall in Sarasaland, there was nothing anywhere near as grandiose as this. We had regular, small mom and pop stores, billboard advertisements and janitors who actually…walked to get from point a to point b.

But then again the Darklands was one of the wealthiest kingdoms around and could afford to pamper its citizenry. In Sarasaland we were working to make sure everyone had access to clean water.

"Ah, here we are," Wendy purred happily, "Come on, let's get you some nice, new clothing from a good friend of the family."

So we entered an expensive little store called _Mademoiselle Lina's_ and the second I enter, I can tell it's definitely a girly-girl's kind of place. The store was set up to look like a posh French boutique and the walls were pastel pink. Each table was lacquered with lace and perfumed with sweet floral undertones.

It's damn near obvious I don't belong in here. Any place that's _this_ overly feminine is automatically anti-Daisy land.

"Ah! Customers! Lovely customers! Welcome, welcome!"

In a whirlwind of excitement a Koopa with large, pink horned-rimmed glasses and a matching bandanna rushed to meet us. She had a measuring tape hung around her shoulder and a big, pink lipstick-y smile. At the sight of her approaching, I smiled a bit; her happiness seemed genuine and not forced simply because she had customers in her shop.

The second Wendy flounced towards her, the said Koopa blinked her big blue eyes in surprise before she squealed happily "Ah! It's my little darling Wendy-woo!"

"Hey Aunty Lina!" Wendy embraced the older Koopa woman with a hug and they both kissed each other's cheek, "You're still looking as great as ever."

"Thank you my little buttercup," Mademoiselle Lina was nothing but smiles, "You're still a vision to see! You look as radiant as ever _cherie_! Now, tell Auntie Lina what brings you back into my wondrous store. You know that I am always happy to have my little buttercup back, but…?"

"Auntie Lina, I'm here to help my friend find a few things," with that statement, the Koopa princess turned her head and directed a sly smile at me.

"Hmm?" Lina looked past Wendy and right at me. She adjusted her bubble-gum pink glasses and squinted, studying me, "Oh! A young human lady hmm? I haven't seen her before, is this a new friend of yours Buttercup?"

"Yes! I've been dying for a girlfriend," Wendy beamed, "Even if it's just her, Daisy'll have to do."

"Hey! And exactly what does that mean?!" I huffed.

"She's a 'tomboy'," Wendy 'whispered' to Lina.

Lina grinned at me, raising an eyebrow, "Ah, a 'special case'."

I stuck my tongue out, causing Wendy to grin and Lina to laugh. Mademoiselle Lina smiled at me before looking to Wendy again, "So what would you like me to do for you today?"

"I was thinking of getting a new wardrobe of stunning dresses, a couple of casual outfits, maybe a cute sporty outfit and…" Wendy grinned in such a ruthless manner I suddenly saw Bowser's features, "One bikini."

I couldn't have heard her correctly. I raised an eyebrow and made a show of slowly turning to look at her, "_What? _I'm sorry, but did you say bikini because I _know _I heard you wrong."

As Wendy chuckled, Lina popped up, "Then we must take Miss—Daisy was it?—Oh yes, then we must take your measurements."

As she maneuvered around expertly with the tape measure and jotting down numbers, I glared at Wendy, "_Why_ do I need a bikini?! I don't '_do_' bikinis! I'm a princess and princesses don't wear revealing clothes."

"One," Wendy raised a finger, "I wear bikinis and two, Peach wears 'em, so there goes that theory Dai. Like if Princess Peach wears bikinis, so can you."

I ground my jaw; even in the Darklands it seemed I was doomed to be compared to my perfect cousin. Would there ever be a time where I wouldn't be referenced to her as if she was the standard of perfection!?

_Peach has blonde hair and you don't and you're flawed._

_Peach is fair and you are tan and therefore you're flawed._

_Peach is tall and slender and you're not, so guess what? You're flawed!_

Stars it's exhausting.

My temper flared as I snapped back my reply, "In case you haven't realized it but I'm not Peach! Just give me a one piece, or a sporty two piece."

"Obviously you're not her." Wendy huffed before she looked at Lina, "Say…Auntie, could I look at that pink tutu?"

Wendy pointed at an object that was far across the shop. Lina had to squint to even see it, "Oh! Of course! I'll be back as soon as possible Buttercup."

Lina took off, singing a tune in French as Wendy watched her go. I realized Wendy turned to speak to me when she was sure Lina was out of ear shot. He jewel-blue eyes darkened as she honed in upon me almost predatorily, "Like okay, enough is enough. I want to let you know that I see right through you Princess Daisy of Sarasaland!"

Confused at the sudden aggressive display, I furrowed my brows, "What are you talking about?"

"I may be pretty and girly, but I'm a dangerously good judge of feeling people out," she huffed, stamping her hands on her hips, "Aren't you tired of being the girl who's 'one of the guys'? You're way too cute for that!"

Her statement took the wind from my sails as I found myself speechless. But Wendy wasn't done with me yet, "Even the toughest women like volleyball players wear bikinis. If they can, then you can too! Every woman should embrace her pretty!"

I sighed and it only seemed to encourage Wendy's admonition further. I was surprised that instead of seeing her usual haughty, spoiled visage, she looked understanding, "Aren't you tired of being eclipsed by Peach? Always being compared to her as if _she's_ what to aspire to be!? Stars it's sickening!"

I could only blink stupidly at her. Maybe this spoiled little princess was far more perceptive than I originally gave her credit for. Or maybe I was just really frickin' transparent and she could see how I was always being compared to my perfect, pretty cousin. It always seemed like she was overshadowing me with her glorious, beauteous glamour and poise.

It seemed like she was the swan and I was the doomed ugly duckling. She was the glowing sun that eclipsed her boyish, mediocre cousin. Emotion broiled over and I was surprised to find myself wiping at my eyes furiously. Am I crying? I don't think I am. In fact I haven't cried since I was seven years old. Last time I cried was at my mother's funeral.

The sight of my tears must have softened her up. Wendy's visage tempered, blue eyes compassionate, "Hey, you're just as special and as pretty as that air-headed princess is! Granted you're a bit rougher around the edges, but honestly I _like_ that about you Dai."

She placed her claw on my shoulder and for the first time gave a sincere, sweet smile, "Your spunk and odd sense of humor is really fetching. And once we shine you up really nicely and prettily, you're going to be in no one's shadow! Tomboys can be like _mad_ sexy too. And I promise I'm going to show you how to work yours._"_

"O-okay," Damn it, I was crying like a wimp, "I-I'll try on anything you want me to."

"Yeah, now come on Dai, let's go and get you beautified!" She cooed, giving a quick hug. I had to bend over a bit but in the hug, I was flooded with her sugary perfume; like a cupcake or something.

She pulled back and beamed cheekily, "I'll pull out all of my best techniques to get you to be the belle of the ball!"

So Wendy ended up having me try on all these damn dresses. Lina and Wendy both pointed out how I had an amazing body and 'killer' legs. And since it was the three of us going through this 'journey together' Lina begged me to call her 'auntie.'

Auntie Lina and Wendy were my approval squad. When I stepped out they both either okayed or rejected the outfits. Wendy claimed that golds, creams and reds fit my complexion better whereas Lina claimed that pink would look pretty on me.

Also Wendy approved three dresses, each of them extremely frilly and lacy as Lina approved the more conservative dresses. I should have known something was up when Wendy whispered something to Auntie Lina.

"We have last thing for you to try on," Wendy's smile was nothing but fire and hell.

"Huh? Like what?" I asked, scratching my head.

"It's necessary," Auntie Lina chipped in giggling, "If you're becoming a 'sexy tomboy,' then you will need this!"

What they were being sly about was my most hated thing I got in that store. I'm embarrassed to even utter what Wendy and Auntie Lina had me buy. It was stuff only Wendy, Auntie and I need to know about.

And no one else.

_Ever._

…

Okay! So I got lingerie, happy now?!

Argh! The lacy, overly expensive, brightly-colored stuff that's highly impractical! Oh by the way? I hate them both. They seemed to enjoy the lingerie-buying process way too much. The whole time Wendy's grinning like sin, whispering things into my ear about who I'm going to 'show it off to' and Auntie's laughing her head off.

Oh man, the whole time I know I was as red as a tomato. I mean what's the point of having bras and panties that nice?! It's not like anyone's gonna see them or anything.

Ahem, so _moving on_.

The only outfit we purchased I really liked was a sporty yellow and black dress. I looked like a super sleek secret agent outfit! And when I struck a pose, Wendy stared at me in a mixture of being both appalled and vexed as Auntie Lina laughed happily, clapping her hands.

"We're getting you a bikini," And with that, Wendy plucked the smallest, tiniest red bikini.

I gaped at her. OH MY STARS! I am not wearing that, that red _string _out in public! Heck! I wouldn't even wear it to take a shower in! The only saving grace was Auntie Lina finding a matching ruby-red sarong. At least it was more than long enough to cover my bottom half. With all of our purchases done, we waved farewell to Auntie Lina, a Koopa I was just starting to become very fond of.

"You make sure to come back and see me young lady," she scolded playfully as she hugged me.

I laughed, "I will, I will. It was nice meeting you Auntie."

"Same here my little pumpernickel."

"Pumpernickel?"

Wendy grinned, "Everyone gets a nickname with Auntie Lina."

"Ah okay then. I'll see yeah later Auntie!"

"_Au re voir_!"

"Alright," Wendy pulled out a pastel pink handheld device, smiling, "Clothes check, hair and nails? Not check. Okay let's get it done!"

"What's that you're looking at?" I peered down over her shoulder so see her closing up an application on her device.

"Oh this? Only the Koopa kpad 10," she shrugged nonchalantly as if having the most advanced, envied device on the market was nothing special, "I'm gonna have to get 11 before next year. It's such hard work being like, on top of all these things—new clothes, new phones, new shoes, new make-up—like hard work you know? Come on, I made a hair appointment that like, you can't be late for."

So the next stop was at a ridiculously large salon that looked ten stories high. I have never been in a salon where people had to take elevators to get to their appointment. I uh, don't know what to say about it since I'm rarely ever in one. It was large and quite beautiful with many mirrors and pictures of women with gorgeous hair.

A few years ago I used to have long, rambunctious hair that frizzed up like crazy. I chopped my hair when I became more serious with my sports. While the maids and servants cried rivers at my sudden loss of hair, I've never looked back. Shoulder-length hair was short enough to stay out of my face but long enough to be considered universally feminine.

"Ah! Miss Koopa! How lovely to see you again!"

A paratroopa with a bright red shell all but leapt _over_ the beautiful marble counter to greet Wendy. I blinked dumbly; was _everyone_ in this kingdom just over the top and crazy like this!? He raised Wendy's small hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her hand.

"Oh Parry please! You flatter me so," she smirked all but loving the attention, "I've come to introduce you to a friend of mine."

She moved back and motioned towards me, "This is my friend Princess Daisy of Sarasaland, Dai this is Parry one of my best friends and an amazing stylist and owner of the salon."

"Hi nice to meet—"

The paraKoopa suddenly jumped in front of me and began to study my face. As his wings were fluttering, he took my face within his hands and squinted, as if he was trying to see through my face or something. I stared back at him wide-eyed; yep, now I'm very sure that everyone in this kingdom was off their rocker.

"Hmm. Hmm. Hmmmm," he hummed thoughtfully, "Yes…no…_Yes_! Oh! Oh! Yes!"

My eyes slid to the side, trying to catch a glimpse of the Darklands' crown princess, "Uh Wendy…?"

"SHH! He's trying to work his miracles! Let him be Dai."

A stranger was holding my face, and I was supposed to be okay with it? "Uh okay then…"

"Ah!" he stepped away from me and smiled, "I've got it! I know exactly what I shall do! First I'll give you my special cocoa bliss conditioner! Then a gentle rinse with the vanilla frappe shampoo, and for volume I'll use my top secret chocolate deep conditioner."

"So uh, are you going to do my hair or feed me?"

This Parry guy laughed delightedly as Wendy sighed impatiently as if dealing with an idiot, "Ugh Dai! Parry ParaKoopa's salon is famous, no legendary for its infamous flavored hair potions! It's the top salon in the Darklands and one of the best salons _period_! As a girl how do you not know this!"

"I dunno," I shrugged, "Maybe secretly beneath it all, I'm really a guy."

Parry grinned at Wendy, "I think your friend here is delightfully charming. But miss Daisy?"

"Yes?"

He smirked a bit, "You're far too pretty to be any guy."

I flushed a bit as he smiled even wider; whoa, was that a compliment! Did this guy just say I'm sexy? Okay not sexy, but good-looking? That's a lesser version of being called hot, but it's still good! The only thing I could do was gawk at him, probably unattractively mind you.

"Now come along Miss Daisy," Parry smirked, "We've got much work to do!"

All beauty regimes I had been put through in Sarasaland or the Mushroom Kingdom had been hellacious, but you know, I'm surprised. I really enjoyed having my hair washed and conditioned. It felt really soothing and was very relaxing. At every turn he complimented me about how beautiful and thick my hair was, whereas people in Sarasaland groaned about how wild and unruly my locks were.

By the time he was blow drying and flat ironing my hair, it smelled sooo good! Parry was really awesome! Through the experience I found out how he was such a funny, warm-hearted guy. He didn't think any of my jokes were lame or corny and in fact he even laughed at a lot of them!

"You Miss Daisy are a riot!" Parry hiccupped, trying to stifle his laughter.

In my Elvis voice, "Thank ya very much."

He burst out into another heap of giggles as I grinned stupidly. Wendy, who was sitting next to me in another chair getting a manicure touched up on already perfect claws, glared at us both disbelievingly. Parry and I exchanged a look with each other before we laughed even harder.

"_OMG_!" she hissed through her teeth, one of her eyes twitching, "I like, can't believe you think her dumb jokes are funny!"

"And how can you not, my princess?" Parry guffawed, "Miss Daisy effortlessly combined a joke about both Arnold SchratzaKoopa with Pope Toad the eighth!"

"Gosh you're sooo bad for Dai, Parry," Wendy sighed, fanning herself with an oversized pink fan as she tried to ignore Parry's rancorous laughter, "I've decided you're both idiots."

"Mmm," I closed my eyes happily, "My hair smells awesome."

Yeah it did! My hair smelt more like a dessert, like pudding or something yummy. Just as Parry was finishing, combing my now straight hair he smiled, "Are you ready to see your glamorous new look my foxy little mama?"

I laughed, "Yeah sure!"

With a slow spin of my chair, I faced my reflection. I gasped, completely stunned and oblivious as Parry and Wendy smiled largely at my reaction. There I stared at the woman in the mirror. She couldn't be me. I mean for one thing, her dark cherry hair was silken with a soft orange halo of high light and was nearly down her back.

Is that really me? I look…

"Gorgeous!" Wendy pounced to my left suddenly and smiled at my stunned reflection, "Dai _you look ravaging_! Ohh! I can't wait until King Dad—" she choked off the sentence suddenly and blushed at a blunder I didn't even catch, "I mean …um until you see yourself?"

I looked at my reflection and beamed, "You know Wendy I'm starting to believe that you know what you're doing with all this beauty stuff."

Wendy grinned like the cat that ate the canary, "Oh hoho! So I finally made a believer out of you hmm? Well we're not done yet, we've got one more stop before we've finished your beauty outing.

"And where are we going?"

"You will find out when we get there, now say goodbye to Parry."

"Bye Parry!" I grinned at the smiling Koopa, "Thanks so much for your work. It's really beautiful."

Parry's blue eyes sparkled mischievously, "Yes I know you are. Beauty, brains and fire! Why if I wasn't spoken for already, I would be willing to give up my shell for a chance to be with you."

Wendy cooed happily, arching an eyebrow and turning around to study my reaction to such a compliment. With a gasp, I know my face was probably tomato red. Parry grinned even larger, "Take care and make sure you stay amazing!"

I smiled, "Okay see ya later."

With a quick hug from both of us, Parry waved a goodbye before he disappeared in the back of the salon. Wendy grinned as she looked at me, "What are you doing?"

"Oh, just hiding these coins before he gets back," I looked at Wendy and beamed, "Parry deserves a really awesome tip for what he's done, but I know he won't accept a tip willingly."

She studied her new manicure—an even brighter shade of cotton pink now—and nodded her head approvingly, "Hmm, I ought to put in a tip too, now where did you place those coins at?"

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><p>Oh my Stars, why did I decide to go along with this? Oh yeah, because the evil tyrant King Bowser is threatening to annihilate my kingdom if I don't. I blinked into the light and sighed; I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe I bought that skimpy, frilly bikini and I can't believe I got my hair—okay actually I really like my new hair style.<p>

When I go back to Sarasaland I'll have to look into going to the salon. But still I'm not too sure about this hot waxing thing. I blinked, looking up at the Koopa hovering above me, "This isn't going to hurt, is it?"

"Oh no sugar, it won't hurt at all."

I closed my eyes and decided to try to relax, " 'Kay."

I felt a warm sensation around my eyebrow; hey this isn't so bad, in fact it feels kind of soothing and—The Koopa ripped something off of my face and I screamed.

"AHHHHHH! DAMN! OH HELL!"

The Koopa lady blinked looking over at me with worry, "Miss Daisy are you okay?"

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT! I THINK I'M BLEEDING!"

I felt the beautician try to ease me back into the bed, "Er, s-settle down please dearie, I need to finish up on you."

"Ugh, that hurt!" I whined, slowly lying on my back again.

Yet again she waxed my other eye brow and I screamed, "Ah! DAMN IT!"

"I'm s-sorry Miss Daisy! Want an icepack?"

"Hell, yeah sure."

"Okay, I'll go get the icepack before I start to wax your legs."

"…LEGS!"

Wendy Koopa stood outside the door to Daisy's room, listening to any little peep the princess made. Every curse, yell and groan all but made Wendy burst out in laughter.

*Riiiip!*

"OOOOUCH!"

"S-sorry princess."

*Riiiiip!*

"DAMN IIIIIT!"

"Sorry again ma'am."

*Riiiiip!*

"Oh! OH! THE PAIN!"

Wendy grinned as she shook her head, "Gosh aren't tomboys supposed to be tough? She's _such_ a baby. But I like her. She'll be good to keep King Daddy on his feet."

"OW! WHY! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME! WHAT HAVE I DONE TO YOU?!"

* * *

><p>It was five pm and Wendy has finally returned me back to the castle. I can barely walk, I'm sore, I'm red—no seriously my entire body is red from that torture I went through! And I'm also thoroughly exhausted from being made 'beautiful'.<p>

We were trekking through the dark halls of the Bowser Keep, and as we passed by servants inclined their heads at the sight of their crown princess. I walked with a limp, trying to ignore the pain of my aching body as I walked beside Wendy.

Wendy must have noticed my odd walk, because it prompted a response from her. Also a couple of servants stared at me as if I was either crazy or stupid.

"Oh stop being dramatic," Wendy hissed, rolling her eyes although she was smirking, "It didn't hurt that bad."

"That evil woman," I wheezed, "Ripped hair from my body! If I see her on the street, she better run!"

"Well stop walking that way," Wendy smirked, chuckling a little, "You look constipated."

"I do NOT! I look like a young woman who…just went through hell."

In a poof of primary-colored shapes, Kammy appeared, "Ah Miss Daisy, how was your da—sparkling Stars in Star Haven, are you alright your grace!? You are waddling more than a goomba."

"I think I'm dying," I groaned.

"Ah yes," Kammy adjusted her glasses as she squinted at me, "You look…er…rather red? Inflamed a bit perhaps?"

"I've been waxed!" I moaned, "Everywhere and it hurts!"

"Ah I see, then perhaps I have just the thing for you," with a flick of her wand, two dry bones materialized out of nowhere, "Your ladyship?"

"Rusty, Bonebag; I would appreciate it if you could see to it that Miss Daisy have a nice cool bath prepared," Kammy replied, "Be sure to add a couple of tablespoons of ice flower and blue shrooms into the bath to combat the swelling. Afterwards get piranha plant balms for some moisture."

"Yes ma'am," with a bow the dry bones scuttled off to fulfill Kammy's orders. The magiKoopa hovered closer, "That bath should help with the pain and redness, after all his cruelty requests your presence for supper tonight."

"Ah…okay."

"Kammy, could you see to it tonight that Dai will wear one of her new dresses we purchased earlier?" Wendy asked, "I'm going to go to my room now and retire. I feel a bit…faint after today's work."

"Consider it done, princess." With another flick of her wand Kammy made my bags disappear, probably sent to my guest room.

"Wait! Wendy." I called out to Wendy who arched an eyebrow, "I just wanted to let you know, beside that evil waxing I had…a lot of fun today. And thanks for the pep talk you gave me, it really helped, you know?"

The haughty visage dropped again as Wendy's petal-pink lips pulled into a true smile and her eyes softened, "Same here girl. I had fun on our little girl's day out. And like, think nothing of it all, I was only like, telling you the truth Dai. Rest up a bit before dinner with King Daddy and seeya later!" she winked as she walked away, "Ta-ta!"

"Yeah…ugh," and just as she started to saunter off I thought of something, "Hey! Aren't you going to be coming to dinner?"

I couldn't imagine having dinner with King Bowser by myself. The guy was practically forcing me to play envoy and if I screwed up he'd slaughter my people. So really, how was I supposed to have a civil conversation with that in the back of my mind!?

Wendy could act as a buffer for the dinner and play 'telephone'. With her presence I wouldn't have to directly talk to Bowser and him to me. Wendy stopped and gave a sly smirk; oh yes I was definitely seeing Bowser in her features now, "_Oh no_, King Daddy would prefer to talk hmm, 'business' with you _alone_. Oh don't like give me that look! You'll be fine Dai."

"I'll be fine!?" I hissed incredulously, "He wants to destroy my kingdom!"

"Oh he's being dramatic," Wendy rolled her eyes, still smiling, "Give him a chance, yeah? He's like, a big teddy bear once you get to know him."

_A big teddy bea_r!? Are we thinking of the same Koopa? You know, the hulking, eight-foot wall of muscle with a terrible temper and decked out in spiked chains!? The same guy who's given Mario all his bruises, bloody noses and broken bones!?

Teddy bear? Yeaaaaaaaah riiiiiiiiight.

"Now then," Wendy was grinning; I must have had a really dumb look on my face, "Quit moping and I'll see you later."

With a sigh I watched as Wendy tossed one last half-hearted wave before she disappeared around a corner bend. Well there went my last hope. I just wish this dinner won't be too awkward with Bowser 'the teddy bear'.

* * *

><p>That Kammy Koopa may be an old, dry hag, but she's an old, dry hag who's smart. That bath I took may have smelled like wrinkled shrooms, but man do I feel refreshed and better! The second I walked out of the bath and into my chambers there were two Koopa maids waiting to help me dress.<p>

I let them decide for me which of my new purchases to wear and both maids decided on one of Wendy's dresses. It was lacy and pearl-colored. The front of the dress would hug my chest—boobies haha!—and I'm not too sure if I want to wear a dress that's revealing.

I may have been waxed and had my hair done, but there's nothing I can do to change how my _rack _is almost nonexistent. I've always been a scrawny little kid, so it really wasn't surprising when I turned out to become a scrawny adult. The only thing that changed was that I grew taller and maybe, just maybe my hips flared out a bit.

I looked at the Koopa maids and started to shed my regular Sarasaland dress. Just when I had stripped down to my lacy slip, they both smirked at me.

I halted in my undressing _immediately_.

Oh uh, what's going on here?

"Miss Daisy," the twin with the blue eyes spoke, "It was…requested by her majesty Princess Wendy that you also wear your other purchases as well."

"Yeah? What other purchases?"

"Her majesty means your delicates," at the blank look on my face the brown-eyed Koopa grinned, "Your lingerie she means."

I felt the color drain from my face, "…Oh."

The Koopa began to rummage through my shopping bags as I gulped. Like really why was any of that necessary? This dress is beautiful enough already! I was going to eat dinner with the King Koopa and the beautiful lace dress was good enough. What was the use of having pretty lingerie on for? It's not like I was going to be showing them to the said King Koopa.

At that thought I choked on my saliva before I blushed, _hard_.

"Ladies, Why is this necessary?" I spoke softly, my face still red, "I mean, what's wrong with what I've got on already?"

Green eyes dismissed me and didn't even stop her rummaging, "Bah! Princess Daisy if your dress is as beautiful as it is, than your unmentionables must be just as beautiful."

I frowned, "Why? It's not as if I'm going to be s-showing them off or anything!"

"If things went well you might be."

"H-Hey! You both can shove it!" I yelled as both of the maids tittered with laughter.

Hmph, idiots.

So I obliged and wore lace undergarments that were nearly the same color as the dress. I squeezed the dress over my head as the Koopa maids hurriedly patted my hair back into place.

"Take a look at yourself in the mirror my pretty lady?" Brown eyes smiled.

I moved before a full body length mirror and gasped. It seemed that yet again my face didn't belong to me. The girl staring back at me was quite…pretty. She can't be me, I mean I guess I see the similarities between us; the same hair and eye color and the same mouth and nose, but her features were so feminine.

I guess all that waxing somehow made my features look softer, smoother and more refined. I felt like I was looking at some pretty girl who couldn't possibly be Daisy of Sarasaland. I looked away and felt myself blush, "T-that can't be me."

"Yeah? And why not?" Green eyes smirked.

"Because…she looks like a girl."

Brown eyes giggled, "Hate to break it to you, but you _are_ a girl."

Before I could retort anything, Kammy Koopa suddenly appeared into the room, "Princess, his lordship is standing by, waiting to see you in the dining hall."

"Ah yes, I'm going out now."

"Splendid. I will show you the way there."

For one of the few times, I didn't have to lift up a heavy dress to move around. I guess the dresses tailored here in the Darklands aren't made into long, heavy ballroom dresses since the weather here is so ridiculously warm.

It's hot in Sarasaland but I still have to wear those big formal dresses. Hmm, you know when I go back home I'll ask the tailor for a wardrobe of light dresses. I followed Kammy through the dark halls and before long, she stopped at an entrance and announced, "Her majesty, Princess Daisy enters."

Even without seeing him, I could hear the grin in Bowsers' voice, "Well send her on in!"

At the usher of her king, Kammy turned on her broom and raised her eyebrow ridges, looking at me expectantly. With a slight flush, I walked into the dining room where the long large dining table was littered with tall, lit candles that made shadows crawl spookily across the table's surface.

The opulence of Bowser's Keep astounded me: a large crystalline chandelier hung overhead, sparkling in a fiery kaleidoscope of colors, various statues of King Bowser sat in the corners of the room and an army of servants waited in the shadows. As I traveled, everything was so eerily quiet I could hear the clanking of my heels echoing through the room.

The Koopa servants were lined up against the wall in two rows, faces stoic. When I passed, the servants bowed and inclined their heads accordingly. The head of the ostentatious marble table came into view and there sat the king, impatiently tapping a claw against the marble tile of the black table.

The headpiece of his chair loomed, nearly touching the ceiling with exaggerated extravagance; the meaning was clear; _this_ was where the damned king Koopa sat. Kamek hovered beside Bowser's armored shoulder and at my arrival, the magiKoopa gave a soft smile. Kamek did a not-so-subtle double-take and I tried to ignore how he nearly fell off of his broom. Bowser looked up, glaring but then seemed to do a double-take just like his subordinate.

The king's irritated visage dissolved into astonishment as I stepped before him. Bowser gaped, jaw hanging and eyes unabashedly scrolling up and down my person. Oh my gosh, _why_ was he looking at me that way?

"… Princess _Daisy?" _he sounded disbelieving, even raising a red eyebrow.

"Yes…it's me King Bowser," I barely whispered.

I know I looked different, but I don't look that bad. Under his intense gaze I bit my lip and looked away, blushing hard. I began to nervously play with the hem of my dress, then stopped. This dress is _not_ long at all!

Oy.

Somewhere nearby there was a muffled _ahem_ and Bowser snapped back to attention. He lumbered to his feet, giant chair scraping against the floor as amazement plastered his face. Bowser coughed into his fist before incredulity and stupor was replaced by his normal smug countenance, "Well and who is _this_ flower that has wandered into my court?"

I squinted an eye, "Haha, _very_ funny."

Now beaming, he continued, "Take a seat won't you milady?"

I nearly drew back in revulsion; there was no way I would sit anywhere near that guy. So, I pulled out a chair that appeared the _furthest_ from him and I glared at Bowser when he chuckled.

"Why don't you take a closer seat, unless you want to be shouting at each other during dinner."

"I think this chair is fine," I huffed.

_I don't want to be near you._

"Oh, now why the cold treatment princess?" he was still smirking, "I thought we were friends."

He was up to something, I know it. "And we are…"

By force but hey, who's holding grudges here?

"Then come and sit right here," he patted the chair closest to him, "I don't bite," then he grinned darkly, "_Much_."

Muffled chuckles fluttered from Kamek, Kammy, and the nearby staff lined up along the walls. I frowned; was that supposed to have been a joke?! King Bowser has chompers the size of my fingers! Mario has told me during one of his attempts to rescue Peach, Bowser had savagely bitten him and I bet it hurt like hell.

And if Bowser tries to bite someone, I'm thinking he's gonna do as much damage as possible. I guess Darklandian humor was a bit more morbid than Sarasalandian humor.

Wriggling his red eyebrows, Bowser patted the chair beside him in a gesture that was supposed to be coaxing. I'm pretty sure if I refused him enough, he wouldn't hesitate to have me hogtied and dragged over into that chair.

"_Come on_," the king crooned lightly, "I promise to be on my best behavior for you."

"Oh that's reassuring," I huffed.

He stood up and pulled the chair out with a flourishing bow. He grinned as I eyed him skeptically, but I cautiously settled into my seat. My nerves rocketed, innards knotting and tightening; this felt so awkward. A man pulling out a woman's chair was _intimate_. But this felt so wrong! I mean, he was _Bowser_ for heaven's sake! The second I sat he also took his seat.

He had waited for me to sit, something a human male from high society would do as a show of respect for a lady. Why would King Bowser, the lord of the Koopas, participate in a societal practice that wasn't his own?

I glared, "What was _that?"_

Still grinning like an idiot, "What was what princess?"

"That waiting until I sit thing. Never do that again!" Truthfully it made me feel awkward.

King Bowser raised an eyebrow, "Well apparently you Sarasaland hicks don't know anything about etiquette and manners, you ought to try them sometime."

"We're not hicks you big…" I eyed him, "…dragon. We're desert people."

"Turtle and yeah?" Bowser snapped his fingers and suddenly the atmosphere around us came to life. Koopas almost magically procured instruments and began to play soft music.

Kammy and Kamek waved their wands, lights dimming and floral decorations materializing upon the table in a burst of polychrome flowers and fresh fragrance. The advisors bowed crisply before they flew out of the room. The maids and waiters were dispersing, scattering to fulfill whatever obligations they had. Bowser leaned an elbow on the table, resting his chin in hand as he looked at me with a grin, "So why don't you tell me more about your people?"

I wasn't sure where to start, so I said the first thing that came to mind, "We're tough."

"Tough?" he echoed mockingly, "How?"

"Well…there's always problems with water shortage, and it's always hot. It's just in our blood to be tougher you know?"

"A water shortage in Sarasaland hmm?" Bowser scratched his chin, "Well I suppose that makes sense. You _do _live in a desert. We're near the Lavalava ocean, so we have plenty of water here."

"We don't treasure jewels and riches like most kingdoms," I smiled at him as I sipped my water, "We value water, shade, and a sturdy place to have in case of a sandstorm."

"Hmm," Bowser purred thoughtfully, "People who value survival over wealth, made tough and durable by their environment."

The king Koopa grinned, "You Sarasaland people aren't as pathetic as I originally thought. But you're nowhere near as awesome as my subjects are."

"Hmph," Bowser grinned at my sound of dismissal, "And in our Sarasaland way, you can kick shells."

"Kick…shells?"

"Yeah, it's our way of telling someone to umm…get off your back? Step off? Something like that."

"Kick shells eh?" Bowser rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

As he was pondering one of my favorite sayings, a small Koopa troopa with a black shell appeared at my side. The cute Koopa troopa inclined his head as I beamed at him, "Oh! Hello there."

"Salutations Princess, my Lord Bowser," the Koopa clucked with a big smile, "Would you like to hear what is tonight's menu?"

"Absolutely!" I chirped.

He cleared his throat before speaking,"For appetizers the chef will serve a fresh Koopa salad with piranha plant leaves, spicy Koopa tomatoes, goomba onions topped with bits of rogue port lobsters."

"Oh wow, that sounds amazing!" I exclaimed sharing a grin with Bowser.

"And for tonight's main courses we shall serve roasted duck, pork, hare, star soup, sweet Koopa potatoes and for tonight's beverages we will serve Koopa wine and cactus juice."

"How does that sound princess?" Bowser asked smiling.

"It sounds wonderful," I laughed, "I don't know if we can finish all this food!"

"Speak for yourself," Bowser harrumphed, "I know how you princesses eat, but my masculine hunger requires much food. I can polish off all this food by myself."

I choked, " How _dare_ you compare me to all those other princesses!"

He blinked, suddenly not looking sure of himself for a change, "Uh…"

"I thought by now you'd know I'm the most unprincessly princess there is, period," I huffed, grinning crookedly.

His normal smirk was back in place, "Hmm, how so princess?"

"Daisy," I waved my hand impatiently, "Well uh, what's an un-princessly thing to do?"

"Hmm," Bowser narrowed his eyes in thought.

Three Koopas appeared, walking a single file line as they carried glinting silver bowls. Each bowl depicted an image of Bowser's fierce visage. The Sarasaland palace had a fine set of silverware we used for dinners and luxurious parties, but it was nothing this extravagant.

As a ruler I am hard pressed to admit the wealth of the Darklands kingdom is truly superlative. Their economy is booming year around and they have one of the most powerful militaries, if not the most omnipotent.

Why if we even had an eighth of their wealth, we could build more proficient irrigation systems and wells in our kingdom walls. As I watched the extra hands set the tables with a bounty of water, cactus juice and Koopa wine I couldn't help but grimace.

Somewhere in Sarasaland there were subjects who were dehydrated, dying of thirst. I watched grimly as the servants set our plates and served fresh salad. The expensive lobster in the salad was enough to feed several families for months.

Bowser must have noticed my displeasure, "What's with you?"

"Ah nothing…" I smiled at him weakly and picked up my fork.

All those pretty rainbow-colored leaves, I almost didn't want to eat it. I put a forkful of salad into my mouth and licked my lips happily; my guilt erased as a mixture of sweet and zesty seasoning graced my mouth. Mmm, delicious! This salad is going straight into my stomach! I halted another spoonful of leaves to my mouth when I felt eyes watching me. I looked up to see Bowser peering at me closely.

His eyes are such a deep fiery red, it's almost impossible to ignore his stare. And now those intense eyes of his were watching me closely. I immediately floundered, "W-what?"

"Hmm?" he blinked, "Oh, uh I was trying to think of something 'un-princessly.' How about arm-wrestling?"

I grinned, "Sure I love it. Most people think it's about strength, but really it's more about strategy then anything. Strength is required, but this," I tapped my head, "is where the real battle happens."

He seemed interested, "Are you good at arm wrestling?"

My grin became downright devilish, "Wanna try me?"

Something sparked behind his carmine eyes and before I could even blink, the Koopa King was nearly on top of me smiling wickedly, "You challenging me princess?" he whispered, a dangerous grin stretching across his maw.

_"Maybe _and if I win, I get to…hmm," I tapped my chin. A bolt of brilliance struck as I bust out laughing, "I get to call you 'Bowwy'!"

The sheer revolt on his face led to a bubbling brook of laughter. I laughed hard, eyes squinting with true mirth. Disgust faded from Bowser's mien as a pensive gleam twinkled in his eyes, "Hmm so what do I get if you lose?"

I shrugged stuffing more salad into my face, "Namf yuh terfs."

"If I win," Bowser pressed the tips of his fingers together with a smirk, "We'll go to the beach tomorrow."

"Okay, sounds good—"

Then he arched an eyebrow and grinned, "But you have to go wearing a bikini."

I gasped and peered at him with abject horror. I felt mortified as my cheeks blazed hotly, glowing with the all too obvious sign of blush. He picked up on this immediately and leaned forward, curiosity on his face, "Are...You _blushing_?"

This only made things worse as my face grew hotter. I bowed my head, hoping my bangs would shield my face from him, "N-No...!"

He grinned largely, fangs aglow under the candlelight and eventually he burst into laughter, "You are! You're red like a tomato!"

"It's not f-funny!" I growled, still betrayed by my reddened cheeks.

"Right," He was grinning, "It's absolutely darling, that's what it is. What an innocent thing you are. I can only wonder how brightly I can make you glow...So, do I get to pick out the bikini or what?"

He laughed again when my face flared red all over again. I punched him square in his arm, "BOWSER!?"

"What?" he was still smirking, rubbing the spot where I had tagged him, "You want to call me 'Bowzie'"

"It's Bowwy!" I laughed. I remembered his terms and huffed, "I'm not asking to see you in…in…uh..a speedo or anything."

"If you wanted to see me in one, you only need to ask," he winked and I busted out laughing, despite myself.

"_Ugh..."_

"So what'll it be, sweet pea?" He was still grinning.

"Uh..."

I bit my lip as ambivalence tormented my thoughts; how was I starting to feel..._relaxed_? This was _King Bowser_, the evil tyrant who tried to kidnap my cousin since babyhood. His cruel affluence spread like the darkest venom, where he had conquered kingdoms and had the temerity to even plunder galaxies. And now even I had become ensnared in his sticky web of treachery. I was to act as a mediator between my kingdom and his and my failure portended of war.

He had become my puppeteer, pulling the strings to make me dance to his rhythm. But then why is he so easy to talk to? He had a raw sense of humor that had me laughing to tears. King Bowser was a good change from the stuffy nobles I've dealt with.

Human nobles were overcritical, cunning and ruthlessly brutal with their cutting words. But Bowser, even his citizens like Aunty Lina and Parry accepted me for who I am. They didn't see my boyishness as a curse, but it seemed refreshing and interesting.

I remembered Bowser had asked a taunting question and I peered into his red eyes. Oh look at that haughty expression on his face. Do I take him up on his offer, kick his ass and get to call that lame nickname?

Mmm, that would taste _so_ good, just to see his face. 'Hiya Bowwy!' Everyone knows King Koopa has one of the worst egos in the universe, and seeing him having to stomach that dumb pet name would be gut-bustlingly hilarious.

However if I, the _champion_ of arm-wrestling manage to goof this one up, I would have to wear that red, stringy abomination in public. _I would have to wear a __**bikini.**_ I quickly sucked in a rattling breath; it was now or never, "Okay Bowwy, we have a deal."

I took his big hand in mine and was surprised at its texture. You know, his hands are a lot warmer than I thought. You'd think an overgrown turtle would have cold, icky hands but his are surprisingly warm and sleek, like a smooth riverstone. The Koopa king looked stumped, "W-what are you doing?"

"Koopas don't shake hands to cement deals?" I grinned at his befuddled expression.

"Heh, the official sealing of a truce huh?" he grinned, squeezing my hand tighter, "We usually blow fire to officiate such transactions but I'll settle for this. And here I thought you just wanted an excuse to hold a studly Koopa's hand."

I gasped as the king roared with laughter. When I tried to pull my hand away from him his smile became softer, "Ah ah ah now."

"W-what are you doing!?"

"Easy," he moved our hands so our elbows rested on the table, "we're just gonna start our arm wrestling match. You sure you wanna do this? Back out now before it's too late princess."

I huffed, "Let's just do it already, turtle. I'll count it down! Three—"

"No, we need an official. Hey you!" Bowser snapped his head around and roared at a nearby Koopa troopa.

The Koopa who had waited idly before suddenly sprung to life, "Y-yes your kingship?"

"You are the official in charge of our arm wrestling contest. Ya know the rules to this game right?"

"Y-yes sire. Whoever pins their opponent's arm to the table is the w-winner," he gulped.

"Good," Bowser grinned, "Now count us down."

"Y-yes sire," the Koopa gulped before starting, "T-three, two…one…GO!"

A congregation of servants and waiters gathered to cheer us on. They crowded around, blended voices nothing but loud, mottled noises. Bowser's grin broke into a wicked sneer. He jerked to the right, forcing me to burn precious strength to reset to center. Then he jerked our arms to the left and again I used up energy to reset.

Ah, the Koopa king was testing me, seeing how much of a pushover I was. I'm sure he's holding back, in fact if he just used an eighth of his true strength he could beat me hands down.

Or so he thinks.

The only people I've ever arm-wrestled were men, and almost all of them have been leagues stronger. Like I said, a true arm-wrestling champ can defeat people several times stronger than them. Being strong is an advantage to arm-wrestling, and if you're the strongest then you're going to beat about ninety-five percent of the people you will wrestle.

I'm in that five percent you won't conquer. If you're smart enough you can use an opponent's brute strength against them and nab a stunning victory. Arm-wrestling rests heavily on technique. If you're not strong, then you must know what you're doing technically or you'll get your ass handed to you on a platter.

The way you tweak your opponents' wrist, arm and the way you maneuver yours is imperative to saving strength and burning theirs. Also being a couple of steps ahead of your opponent clenches victory too. A swell of sweat dotted my hairline as I focused on the Koopa king.

His arrogance made me sneer; what? Cute lil Daisy sneering at the king of all Koopas? You bet your sweet ass I did! Leave all friends at the finish line, it's time to win! I squeezed Bowser's hand tighter and narrowed my eyes in concentration. At the silent challenge, Bowser's eyes slanted and he applied more pressure to my hand. Hmm, let's get him off-balance a bit, yeah?

I growled as I squeezed his hand as hard as I could and I quickly wrenched his arm forward, then reversed and sent it backwards. Hey! He's losing grounds! I'm winning! I'm winning! Just centimeters before his arm hit the table, his orange bicep halted, as if suspended in midair.

I frowned and forced strength into my push, furrowing my brows in concentration. Even though I was holding his hand, I could feel the reverberation from Bowser's chuckle.

"Hmm not bad," he purred, then a slow grin spread across his maw, "For a pretty little thing you're kinda strong."

"_P-Pretty_!?" I gulped; I could feel a smear of blush growing across my cheeks from his off-colored comment. Bowser smiled yet again; I'm starting to think he likes doing that.

I gasped as Bowser began to slowly force my arm in the opposite direction. I paled as the roar of the crowd grew louder at the show of their king's strength. Holy crap! I snarled and tried vainly to force his arm in the opposite direction but it didn't stop him! I grimaced, starting to feel defeat rapidly approaching.

Oh gosh is there anything I can do?! Maybe a last second knuckle twist before he tries to pin me? Okay, that's my last resort then. Play like I can't do anything, then at the end, put everything I have into the last maneuver. Just as Bowser was inches away from the winning pin, I quickly flipped our positions. I released a laugh but then choked it back as Bowser performed the same maneuver and pinned my arm to the table.

_A double knuckle twist?_

I must have grown pale; I lost.

I…I lost?

I've been arm wrestling since I was ten, and ever since I became thirteen, I became undefeated. I can't believe I've lost! The other Koopas were cheering, all of them shouting their praise to their great king. Others were patting Bowser on his shoulders as the king himself was gloating, face utterly smug in the air of his victory.

Jerk.

Even though I'm one of the biggest sorest losers around, I was still a princess and a representative of Sarasaland. I had to show good sportsmanship. I hastily moved my smooth bangs out of my face—which I'm pretty sure was red with anger—and looked at Bowser, "Good match King Bowser," I said through my teeth; ugh I hate losing!

"Like I said, you're actually pretty strong, Princess," gosh I wish I could wipe the smirk off of his face, "you're far stronger than you seem."

As the others were filing out, I frowned, "You could have beaten me the whole time, I think you were just toying with me..."

Still smiling Bowser shrugged, "You're good but I'm just better…and stronger. You should be proud you lost to such a studly specimen of Koopa." The fleeting anger disappeared as I bust out into laughter, "You are such a mess!"

He was still grinning as he winked, "And you love me for it."

I rolled my eyes, smiling, "You soooo wish."

"Heh," he grinned, showing off his fangs, "So shall we finish the rest of dinner?" again Bowser snapped his fingers and the servants came in carrying beautiful silver trays.

Served on large platters, the delicious meats appeared in beautiful arrangements. The servants took their rehearsed positions and simultaneously placed the cooked meats on the marble table. They bowed to both Bowser and myself before slinking away.

Next came the side courses of potatoes, steamed vegetables, more leafy salads, and breads. I helped myself to a little of everything and decided to eat the special Koopa pork. I slid the fork into my mouth and nearly melted at the taste. It was so delicious and it nearly dissolved in my mouth. I could feel the smoked pork nearly fall from the bone effortlessly.

The rich flavors exploded in my mouth and I sighed happily with the second forkful. From the corner of my vision I could see Bowser grinning, "I'm gonna take a wild guess and say you like dinner?"

"Oh it's to die for!" I sighed, washing down my meal with the tangy cactus juice.

"Here, you gotta try the flame-roasted hare."

Just as I went to reach for the platter, Bowser's fork suddenly appeared in front of my nose. I blinked dumbly before I registered what he was trying to do. Stars, the King of Koopas was trying to feed me from his very own fork.

I couldn't even hide the blatant shock upon my face and seconds later our eyes met; I was still stunned while he looked utterly amused, smirking even. I flushed; didn't he know that only significant others shared food from the same fork!?

"T-That's okay," I floundered, "I'll just cut a slice from the—"

"Eat it," he shook the fork.

"But King Bowser—"

"Try it princess," he purred, a deep rumble from his chest, "My arm's starting to hurt holding this fork like this."

His arm is starting to hurt, _oh please_. With all those big muscles I wouldn't be surprised if he could crush boulders. With a sigh of defeat, I leaned forward and delicately kissed the end of his fork. I tried to ignore the obvious content glowing on Bowser's face.

"What do ya think?" he smiled, looking far too happy about something.

"It's delicious!" I grinned, "Now I'll have to have some! Yum."

"Good to hear," still grinning he winked before he licked the fork and continued to shove more food into his mouth and I halted.

Did he just _lick_ the fork I just ate from? I twitched at the thought of sharing an indirect kiss with the king of all Koopas. While we continued to eat, I noticed something that was both kind of weird and extremely funny. I'm pretty sure when I wasn't looking, Bowser would hurriedly lick his utensils and his hands.

Just to put my thesis to practice, I 'looked away' and out of the corner of my eye I saw Bowser hurriedly shovel food into his mouth. He tore through his meal with a savage zeal. I pretended to wipe my mouth with a napkin as I stifled a laugh. What is he doing?! Like seriously who is he trying to impress here?

He's eating with etiquette he doesn't believe in. Every time he thought I could see him, he tried cutting and eating his food with a fork that was so small in his large hands it was comical.

I coughed, hiding a laugh at the sight of Bowser impractically stabbing at his meat with a tiny fork. I decided to suddenly 'look away' again to buy him some more time to actually eat. As he continued to inhale his food, I accidentally let out a rather loud snort.

We both halted.

Still smiling, I covered my mouth as Bowser was…well, his maw was dripping with the juices of tonight's soup. As soup dribbled messily down his chin in thick rivulets, his eyes were wide, caught in a state of absolute mortification. For a split second he looked shocked before his expression morphed into fury.

"W-What are _you _laughing at?!" his words were mixed thickly with a deep growl, red eyes glowing darkly as his large fists clenched.

I grinned largely, "At you obviously."

My laughter rang out and again I was treated to a rare sight as Bowser's face glowed a charming shade of red, but his embarrassment was short-lived and it quickly transformed into anger.

I'm pretty sure there was even smoke wafting from his nostrils as he narrowed his eyes. Before he could open his mouth, I cut in delicately, "King Bowser, if that's the way you eat here in the Darklands, then who am I to tell you otherwise? This is your kingdom and therefore your customs are law, and I as your guest, shall respectfully observe them."

Bowser paused, looking surprised yet again, if not a bit sheepish, "Y-you mean you aren't grossed out or anything?"

Releasing one last giggle, I shook my head, "No not at all. You obviously haven't eaten spaghetti with the Mario brothers."

At the sound of his adversaries' names, Bowser's eyes slanted once more. I interrupted him again, "But truth be told you are a bit messy."

"Yeah? Well this is how a real Koopa eats!"

"Ssh, I know," I plucked a nearby napkin and dabbed away at his mouth, "That one spot on your nose is annoying me so badly though."

Although Bowser's eyes grew large and round in surprise, I noticed he didn't move away. Once he was clean enough I pulled away from him and smiled, "See all better now."

Still shocked, he coughed before he looked away, "Uh…yeah…thanks."

He promptly ducked his head a bit, and started hurriedly eating at his food. I couldn't help but grin when I realized how the king was clearly going out of his way to avoid meeting my eyes. Was Bowser feeling shy after that? There's no way this was the same arrogant, evil dictator everyone outside of the Darklands was afraid of.

"Go ahead and eat however you like. But if you get to be lax in your manners, than so can I!" I winked at him.

I immediately put my elbows on the table and began to slurp away at my soup. Bowser perked up and began to happily devour his food in the way a 'real Koopa' should. This was one of the few times that I really enjoyed myself at a meal. I wasn't a total slob but I could eat around someone who wasn't judging me.

It felt good.

* * *

><p>"Oh my goodness, I can't believe you said that!"<p>

In a roar of laughter Bowser and I continued our stroll back to my room. The Koopa King winked at me, "What, did you think I'd let him get away with saying something so stupid?"

"Well no…" I choked back another silly laugh, "But still! That was mean."

"And yet you're laughing," Bowser grinned, "You Sarasaland people are almost as heartless as us Koopas.

"Hmm, almost but not quite."

As we passed through another corridor there loomed my large silver door as a tangible reminder my evening with the Koopa king was over. I knew we were at our destination for the night. Bowser looked down at me with his ever-present grin as I all but broke my neck to meet his fiery gaze.

"Well I hoped you enjoyed dinner tonight," he chuckled, "I learned a lot about you and your people. Heh, maybe we'll have to have another go at arm-wrestling again eh?"

"Yep! I have waaay more tricks I have to show you," I flexed my bicep.

Bowser huffed, "Look at that puny thing, I'm surprised you can even lift your fork to your mouth."

"Oh yeah?" I crossed my arms, "Well let's see your _amazing_ arms then King Bowser, since my biceps are _oh so lame_."

King Bowser grinned, showing off pearly long fangs before he flexed his arm and I gasped at the definition in his scaly orange arm. Oh my gosh, I have never seen muscles that big before! What, did he like bench-press boulders or something!?

"Holy cow!" I choked, "Are those real!?"

Bowser smirked, "Well why don't ya see for yourself? Go ahead and touch if it pleases you."

I poked at his arm and felt the rock-hard bulge of muscle. Just as I pressed against his bicep, he suddenly raised his arm, lifting me into the air with effortless ease. I squeaked as I dangled in the air, hanging onto his arm for safety. Bowser raised an eyebrow as he elevated me to face-level, "Convinced yet of the king's 'amazingness' yet naysayer?"

"Y-yeah I am," I looked down at the floor, chuckling a bit nervously, "Wow is this what everything looks like to you?"

He laughed, "Yep, you're all a bunch of tiny peons." With that he lowered me back down and I let go.

For an alarming moment there was a stale stretch of silence where neither of us knew what to say. I fiddled fretfully with the hem of my dress while King Bowser glanced around the room, scratching listlessly at the back of his neck.

"Well I—"

"So how about—"

Both of our heads snapped up at the same moment and after realizing the dual interruption, we both chuckled. King Bowser grinned, crossing his powerful arms, "You go, ladies first."

"Oh," I flushed, a bit flustered from his show of manners, "Well, um I just wanted to say thank you for dinner King Bowser," I smiled, "I really enjoyed myself with you, and spending time at the mall with Princess Wendy was a delight as well."

He titled his head, arching an eyebrow with a rakish smirk attached,"Yeah same here Princess. You can hang off my arm any time."

I leaned closer to the Koopa king, not noticing the perplexed look crossing Bowser's face; should I give him a hug? It was Sarasaland protocol for a princess to hug her guest for the night.

Before I could talk myself out of the hug, I took a quick gulp of air and hurriedly locked my arms around his middle. My fingers pressed against the cool, sleek surface of his shell and I blushed as I felt the king's strong form tense within my arms.

With each passing second my face grew hotter as my cheek pressed against his plastron, which was oddly warm. My voice came out an awkward squeak, "T-Thank you for the dinner tonight my king. It was my pleasure to be your guest."

Seconds later a tickling reverberation traveled through his torso. Uh oh, is he growling at me? For a moment I thought he would shove me away in a huff of indignant anger but then I felt him wrap his massive arms around me.

"Good night Princess." I also laughed at how his voice echoed through the cavities of his chest and tickled me, "It is my ultimate pleasure to have the fair Sarasaland Princess as my guest."

I slowly unlatched from him and waltzed into my room, shutting the door. I listened to his heavy footsteps until they faded away. Once he was gone, I smiled to myself. I haven't had so much fun at a dinner since…well, until tonight.

* * *

><p>Alice: Hey everyone! Thanks for reading! And keep reviewing! (blows a kiss) ^_^<p> 


	4. Green: A Day at the Beach with princess

_Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom._

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>"I can't believe I'm doing this," I groaned, throwing my head back in annoyance.<p>

Yesterday had been my first night at the notorious Bowser's keep and honestly staying here felt like a vacation. The jet-jacuzzi made for a perfect bath, all of the shampoos, conditioners and perfumes stored here were the most exclusive, expensive name brands that would turn Peach green with envy, and my bed felt almost too comfortable and too large for me.

"Oh it looks fine, you're just being fickle, princess."

"Am not!"

My king-sized bed had a remote control—no seriously, it had a friggin' remote—where I could adjust both the heat and how soft it was. By the time I finished playing around with the remote I drifted off into something very close to the best sleep I've ever had in my life!

"Here, stand up a bit more straight—see! Looks better already!"

"If you say…"

Then, from the moment I woke up this morning, I was floored by the amount of attention I received. The staff was _literally_ right outside of my doors ready to wait on me. The staff listed off the breakfast menu—how exciting! At home you simply ate what the chef made—and I ordered breakfast and moments later I had one of the most delicious pancakes and fruit parfaits I've tasted.

So after a second serving—that parfait was awesome plus ten—I let the maids know I was ready to get dressed for the day and seconds later the twins came to help me out. You know the two twins who look just alike, save for the fact that one girl has green eyes and the other has brown eyes.

Therefore I have dubbed them…Twiddle Green and Twiddle Brown respectively.

Yeah I know, it's kind of lame, but catchy at the same time.

So now here I stand looking at my reflection in a humongous mirror. With The twins standing behind me, they were gauging my appearance for themselves acting as my so called 'voice of reason'.

"We are rather happy to see you like this," Twiddle Green and Twiddle Brown were smiling at my reflection. Under instruction of 'la fasionista' Wendy, they both had chosen a soft silky blue dress for me to wear.

"You look gorgeous princess," Twiddle Green smirked at me.

"The King will be floored when he sees you in this," Twiddle Brown winked at me.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror with nothing but horror. A bronze complexioned, red-headed girl stared back at me with big, eyes wide in stupor. Only unlike my usual reflection I see on a daily basis, I didn't have on much clothes today. But today I had to honor King Bowser's deal and wear this damn bikini to the beach. Ugh even just saying the word makes me feel like I have the cooties.

Bikini.

Bikini!

Bikini?

Yep, no matter how it's said, it still gives me the shakes.

"You look great," Twiddle Brown said, beaming.

"I think you girls are crazy," I huffed.

As the twins looked on at my reflection, I rested my hands on my hips. I stared back at my skinny figure skeptically, frowning. I don't know what was so amazing here; I had no boobs, stubby legs, and barely curved hips, oh yeah I won't be surprised if the king koopa will laugh when he sees me in this.

_He's a king after all and I've yet to know a king who hasn't had his share of beautiful women. Even father turns litters of perfect women down..._

Together they did that weird twin-thing where they shook their heads simultaneously and spoke in one voice, "Your self-perception is very unrealistic."

With a grunt I pulled on another new dress from my shopping excursion with Wendy. This one was blue and a tad bit shorter than knee length. I stepped into sandals and was ready to be on my way.

I looked at them and grinned, "Well, you girls try not to have too much fun without me here."

They both grinned and spoke in one voice, "And you try not to have too much fun with his majesty."

"We'll want details later!" Twiddle Brown called out.

I stepped out of my room and I wasn't all too surprised to see Kammy Koopa standing outside. Yet again she appeared hard at work, looking over some type of device in her hand. The moment she heard the door close, she looked up and fixed her spectacles upon me.

"Morning my ladyship," she straightened up for a second before she inclined her head respectfully, "May I inquire about how your first night here went? Was everything satisfactory?"

"Morning Kammy and yes everything was very nice here! I swear that was the best sleep I've ever had!" I smiled at the stolid magikoopa before turning my gaze to the glowing handheld, "Hey watcha got in your hands there?"

"The koopaberry curve 375 and I'm currently overlooking his lordship's itinerary," Kammy adjusted her glasses, "It's a great tool to organize and manage his majesty's rather frenzied royal schedule. Now that you are dressed and ready to go, you shall accompany his nastiness to the Lavalava beach."

"Umm…okay," I blinked, "Say where's Kamek? Isn't he normally with you?"

"The chief adviser is awaiting you along with his lordship." She answered laconically; short and to the point, I supposed Kammy just didn't waste words.

"Ah…"

"I've just received word from Kamek and His Cruelty should be ready in a few minutes," Kammy stopped reading from the tablet in hand and looked up at me with that practiced stoic face of hers, "Any questions about today's schedule I can take care of for you?"

"Uh no, not really…"

Actually yes; first off, if I'm supposed to be a delegate for my Kingdom then why in the world are we headed to the beach? Granted I like the beach just as much as the next person but I never really figured building sandcastles and talking politics went very well together.

Kammy seemed pleased with my response and nodded her head crisply, "Very well then, please follow me if you will."

I trailed the small magikoopa through the dark halls and as we passed by, all servants inclined their heads as they scuttled by. I shouldn't be surprised as one of Bowser's head advisers, she held a great deal of power. Perhaps only second to the king himself.

We made it to the throne room which was amazing! It was a large, massive room filled with towering statues of koopa royalty and a glass floor. Below the flaming sea of lava danced, waning and waxing in a hypnotic gyration.

"Wow, so this is the throne room?" I was truly awed by the room's air of strength, and yet there was also a natural majestic beauty, "Truly magnificent…My father would love seeing this."

"Why yes," A bit of excitement touched Kammy's voice and she even cleared her throat, "The throne room was built originally in the year 1025 under the instruction of King Bowcuz III and has been renovated ever since. This structure that you see before you—the sea of lava under durable invisiglass—which was created by the ancestors of the magikoopa mind you—was established under the reign of Lord Bowser's grandfather the late King Serous III and as you can see—"

This architecture was amazing! There sat the king koopa's throne, a structure nearly touching the tops of the tall ceiling. Beside his chair were pillars of fire, dancing in a wild rhythm.

"—you see the truth is, the great koopa kings have always had quite the fascination with lava and fire, the mighty always have such fetishes with anything symbolizing power. And have you noticed the stone koopa statues over to your right? They are, in fact, the oldest parts of this castle with them being as old as seven hundred years old! That first statue is King—"

I lightly ran my fingers over the throne's armrest; these things were huge! Were Bowser's arms really this massive? I could only wonder what he looked like sitting here. I bet he was a vision, one that inspired both awe and fear.

I broke out of my musing and turned to Kammy, who was still prattling off proudly about the throne room's history. If she wasn't speaking so fast and going from topic to topic, her speech might have been interesting.

"—_Alas it seems the mysterious majesty of dancing flames and the endless sea of fire impart an almost hypnotic hand and arouse a koopa's insatiable yearning for ambition and authority _— That was a quote from one of my favorite poems from the late King Koopa Cedric and though he was a bit bashful about it, he was quite the poet. Our library has several volumes of his poetry and though I should not admit this to you, King Bowser rather enjoys reading—"

A cell phone jingle went off and Kammy snapped out of her trance, picking up her koopa berry device. She scrolled through the device then spun to face me, "It appears his greatness shall be arriving shortly and then the carriage can—"

"Hey hag!"

I could hear Bowser approaching. With each step, the room shook and furniture jumped. Seconds later Bowser entered the room grinning like he breathed fire. Okay so he does but uh…yeah…Kamek was hovering by his side beaming at me warmly.

"Nice to see you this morning Miss Daisy," Kamek nodded his head, a kind smile present, "I hope so far your stay as been pleasant here my dear?"

"Likewise! And yes I'm enjoying myself here."

"And I hope the room service was to your liking as well?" Kamek moved from hovering near Bowser's shoulder until he was right at my eye level, "I thought you'd enjoy a hearty breakfast of honey hotcakes and raspberry parfaits."

"And they were both delicious!" I smiled at him, "You'll have to give me the parfait recipe; sweet and tart at the same time."

"It was actually my grandmother's recipe," Kamek winked, "When I began to first work here, I had the King Serous—Lord Bowser's Grandfather—try one and ever since he ordered the staff to learn the recipe."

"Well Grandaddy King Koopa had the right idea! That parfait is all that!"

"And a bag of koopa chips," Kamek chuckled softly as I laughed.

"A bag of koopa chips?" Kammy grumbled to herself, "I can't _believe _you just said something so lame…"

I smiled at the friendly magikoopa as Kammy kept a straight face. Bowser's two trusted advisers had completely opposite personalities. Kamek being more good-natured and friendly, even letting his humor shine through his actions and words.

Whereas Kammy was completely all business and composed, until someone—Kamek I'm learning—pissed her off then she would wail away at him viciously. They seemed like a good balance.

"Well now that we got that out of the way," Bowser shot a smirk at his adviser before he glanced back at me, "It's good to see you princess." He beamed; you know for a flame-blowing dragon—er turtle, Bowser had a very infectious smile, even if it appeared malicious.

"Like wise King Bowser. You ready to go?"

"I'll ask all the questions here, thank you very much," his grin grew bigger, "So…you ready to go?"

Shaking my head at his foolishness I laughed, "Alright, let's go before I decide not to go to the beach with you."

"Do it and I'll drag you there," he growled playfully.

"Your majesty, the meeting with the elders of the Smokelands burrow is scheduled for tonight at seven, is that all right?" Kammy asked.

"Yeah, yeah, just keep the castle in running order 'til I get back hag and geezer."

Kamek and Kammy both spoke together as they bowed in unison, "Absolutely your wickedness."

With a sharp grin, Bowser motioned me to walk in step with him. We exited the castle and headed outdoors. We walked—well I walked, Bowser stomped—to the launch pad where several koopa troopas and parakoopas were waiting. They were wearing helmets, scarves and goggles, dressed like pilots. They must have been Bowser's mechanics, flight crew or something.

At the sight of their king they slapped a sharp salute and moved away from the clown car, "All preparations are ready sir! Engines are online and you are free to fly!"

"Alright." And in one large leap he hopped in.

Wow!

For someone his size, who knew Bowser could jump that high?! He even did an impressive flip midair! He completely omitted climbing up the stairs. I grabbed hold of the ladder and began to climb up.

Just as I was halfway up, Bowser leaned down and offered his hand. I raised an eyebrow and snuffed at his help; the tomboy of Sarasaland didn't need help to get in that thing. As a child I've climbed taller trees than that!

I frowned, "What? You think I _need _help getting into that clown car thing?! I've scaled taller…walls. This is nothing for me. _Nothing_."

"Oh well, _excuse me_ then miss warrior princess," Bowser whuffed, arching an eyebrow in amusement, "Please go ahead with your bad self."

There were times when life forces me to admit I was wrong and this was sadly another one of those moments. As I steadily climbed up the ladder and into the clown car, I never realized how rickety and wobbly the ladder was under my feet.

Several times along the climb my foot slipped. The aircrew below watched as I, the princess of Sarasaland, made a spectacle of myself. I didn't bother to look at the head honcho because I knew he was boiling over with smug pride. Bowser watched, arms crossed and perfectly content as I tried to crawl my way over the rim of the clown car.

Just as it seemed the last of my clumsy, gracelessness journey was over, I accidentally kicked the ladder out. I reacted, grabbing onto the mouth of the clown car, screaming in surprise and kicking my legs.

I could hear Bowser's loud, obnoxious laughter as I dangled on the edge of the car. Mouth agape, I stared at him as he held his stomach and guffawed heartily.

Jerk.

Just to rub it in, Bowser leaned over and smirked, "You sure you don't wanna take up my offer? I'm kinda starting to enjoy the way you're dangling like a Cheep-Cheep on a hook."

My face glowed red as he continued to bark out laughter. He wiped a tear from his eye and blinked, "Hmm?"

Bowser's mirth drained viciously, red mane standing up as he growled. He yanked me into the clown car and barked at his subordinates below, "And just WHAT are you idiots drooling over?!"

"W-we're s-so sorry your n-nastiness," one koopa gulped extremely red-faced for some reason.

"Get out of my sight before I charbroil you bastards!" And just to show he was willing to make good on his threat, the back of his mouth glowed an ominous shade of red as he growled.

The koopas scattered faster than Yoshi hopped up on Yoshi candy and were soon gone. With one last snort, Bowser turned to me and had a strange expression on his face. I couldn't tell if he was mad or befuddled but he_certainly w_asn't happy, "You know, I'm starting to begin to _believe_ the whole tomboy thing with you."

I blinked, "Huh?"

"Don't you know how to act like a lady?!" He growled, "There's certain things you _do_ and…don't _do_…"

What gives!? I don't know what he's talking about, but how dare the King of Koopas tell _me_ about acting like a lady. Last time I checked I was the girl here not him! I crossed my arms and raised an inquisitive eyebrow at his ambiguous statement.

"And just what in the world are you talking about _Bowwy?_"

He leaned forward until his face was inches away from mine. He squinted an eye, "I thought when I kicked your ass yesterday, you don't get to call me that stupid name?!"

"Fine fair enough," I laughed, grinning larger at the sight of Bowser rolling his eyes, "But what is your tirade about 'being a woman' or something?"

A quick look crossed his face, something akin to surprise as he suddenly spun around and began to fire up the clown car. The engines and propeller flared to life and in a loud roar of firing engines, we were airborne. I looked over the edge of the clown car to see the castle starting to fade away.

I noticed even as I moved, he was clearly avoiding eye contact with me. Hmm, another shy Bowwy moment? Okay now I was really curious, what has him looking so wary all of a sudden?

"So are you going to explain why you almost barbecued your aircrew down there?"

"They...Well...Uh..."

"Yes...?"

"Y-You should…uh…well I mean," he scratched at the back of his neck nervously. He growled and suddenly spun to face me with a cherry-red face, "D-Don't you know anything about _being a girl?_! You have to watch what you do or you end up flashing everyone! You just gave those aircrew idiots a free show! One of those pervs had a _major _nosebleed!"

"Flash…wha..?" then it hit me, I was dangling right above the heads of all those koopa.

A hot, blazing heat exploded in my cheeks, nearly making me lightheaded, "_Oh my stars_! O-Oh crap."

Bowser chuckled and shook his head, "Look…just be careful about that kind of thing. I know you don't do 'girly' but maybe you oughta act like one when you wear a dress. We don't want just anyone to get a free peek at your goodies eh?"

Cheeks still hot, I clamped my hands tightly around the hem of my dress, "R-Right…"

"Lucky bastards," he muttered.

"What was that?"

"I said those rat bastards."

"Heh, I know right?"

* * *

><p>It wasn't much more than half an hour when Bowser landed the clown car on the sands of the beach. I looked around, noticing how peaceful and quiet it was. I don't think I've ever been on a vacant beach before. He hopped out first, landing in the sand with a loud <em>whump<em>! And just as I tried to crawl down myself, Bowser shook an admonishing finger at me.

"Let me help you down, Daisy."

"Kick shells, I can get out myself."

"Oh how short your memory is princess," He chuckled, talking in a deeper voice, "We wouldn't want a repeat of what happened earlier today now would we?"

My eyes shot open, "!"

He smirked mischievously as I blushed hotly. I shook my head and took his offered claw. I thought he would yank me down but he was surprisingly gentle. I cooed appreciatively at the beautiful beach. For a place called Lavalava beach it was gorgeous!

It was a black sand beach and the water seemed to sparkle purple in hue. I quickly plucked off my sandals, wiggling eager toes into the sand. It was so warm and smooth. I looked over my shoulder to see Bowser approaching, "So what do ya think of the beach? I had it rented out for today. Was a bit of a pain in the ass but if you like it..."

"It's gorgeous," I smiled as I scooped the sand into my palms and studied it, "This is my second time being at a beach."

"And your first?"

"I went to the Peach Beach for Peachy's sweet sixteen party," I looked up at him and smirked, "And you crashed it and kidnapped her. But before you left you ate the whole cake. I won't lie, I was impressed with how you took it out with three chomps."

Bowser guffawed and shook his head, "Yeah I remember that! Damn, that cake was at least five tiers tall! It was pure chocolate and the strawberries were delicious and—"

He cut himself off, attention on me, "Wait, _you_ were there!?"

"Yeah, I attend all of Peach's parties," I shrugged at him and gave a lopsided smile, "she _is_ my cousin after all."

He squinted, "Cousins, really? Well you two look nothing alike if you ask me. She's blond and fair and you have red hair and have uh what's that pricey drink? The one coffee addicts go crazy over?"

I laughed, "Latte? Mocha? Cappuccino?"

"That's it! Your skin looks like a mocha. Huh, well why don't I recall seeing you there?"

I huffed, dropping to my knees. My fingers caressed the smooth sand, "Why? What difference would it have made?"

I was surprised when Bowser gave a crooked smirk, "'Cause maybe I would have kidnapped you instead."

"Oh no you wouldn't have," I laughed, "At sixteen I was a scrawny, short, knobby-kneed girl. You would have opted for my slender and beauteous cousin."

Bowser made a face, "You speak as if you're not any of those things."

I laughed, shrugging my shoulders, "Of course I'm not! I'm still just as skinny and boyish today as I was back then."

The King Koopa's expression was deadpan before a smirk crawled onto his face, "What an idiot. Clearly your self-perception is off."

"Eh maybe." I placed my hands in the sand again and smiled, "This sand is so much softer than our sand in Sarasaland. I bet in a sandstorm this would tickle your skin. Our sand actually cuts flesh in storms."

"You know what I'm tired of hearing about? Sand _and _your freakin' kingdom. I feel like messing around in the water, don't you?"

I rose to my feet, clapping away the last traces of sand, "Yeah I guess."

I followed Bowser over to the purple waters and eyed it with interest. I sunk a cautious toe in and purred; it was delightfully warm! It felt like the waters of a bath! I glanced over at the koopa king. I glimpsed at his massive shell and wondered if he wouldn't suffocate underwater with that thing.

"Not to point out the obvious," I grinned a bit, "But uh…Aren't you afraid you're gonna drown with your shell?"

"That's why it needs to come off."

"…Eh?"

Bowser tossed a wink my way and before my eyes he…well I don't know how he did it, but he removed himself from his massive, spiky shell. I stared at him, mouth agog as he stretched his limbs and even cracked his spine. Whoa! _He can take his shell off?! _There he stood wearing what looked to be a pair of dark red swim trunks.

He was far fleshier than I had originally thought. He had muscular arms, legs, a powerful torso and really well developed abs!? My eyes grew so wide I thought they would fall out of my head; _oh. My. Stars._ _Does the king of Koopas have a six pack?!_ He turned to face me, smirking insufferably, "Your turn."

"Wha? Oh." I flushed.

Bowser placed both hands on his hips and smirked. My mind wandered into the purgatory of indecision; did I really have anything to worry about? I know my swimsuit is far more revealing than I'm used to but as a koopa would Bowser even look at my body like a human guy?

Or would I do absolutely nothing for him? Maybe I was over-thinking this; why would a koopa want to see an undressed human girl anyways? My face grew warm under his gaze, "Could you uh, look away for a sec?"

His grin nearly split his face, "Why?"

"Please just…look away?"

Bowser snorted smoke, " I'm going to see you anyways so what's the point of—?"

My eyes should have glowed red, "**I SAID LOOK AWAY**!"

With a huff he turned away and crossed his arms. I heard him muttering something under his breath, "…Pushy little woman."

I sucked in breath for courage and counted to three in my head. Before I could convince myself to hightail it out of there, I ripped the dress over my head and stood in the morning sun exposed and blushing furiously.

_Holy Stars I feel naked! Look at that! I see legs, arms and boobs!_

_…Not much but they're definitely there!_

I quickly wrapped the long sarong around my hips and even then I still felt mightily exposed to the elements and soon to Bowser's eyes. He may have been a koopa but I know for a fact he's still a _male_ koopa. I crossed my arms over my chest but this only pushed my cleavage up like a push-up bra. With a helpless groan, I decided to let my arms hang at my side.

I cleared my throat a bit awkwardly and tried to ignore how badly my voice cracked, "Uh…you can l-look now."

"Ha finally," he spun to face me, "for a moment I thought this whole trip I would be staring at the mountains and—"

His eyes landed on me, growing wide and jaw dropping momentarily. I flushed harder when his eyes swept across my petite frame from head to toe. His eyes lingered on my hips and bust for a second; long enough to make me blush.

"Oh _yeah_," he growled, laughing "this only _proves_ how out of touch you are with self-perception."

I blushed, if possible harder at his words.

While he had a slight grin that revealed one of his fangs, I realized he wasn't ogling me. At the sight of a girl in a tiny red bikini, most guys couldn't keep their eyes in the back of their heads. I was surprised and at the same time pleased. I unfolded my arms and relaxed a bit more; _well I guess I do have nothing to worry about. I am a human so I suppose a koopa wouldn't really have any reason to eye a human girl._

He gave one last lingering appraisal before he turned and marched into the water. I followed behind, marveling at how warm and pretty the water was. It was like swimming in liquid amethysts.

"I wonder why this water is soooo warm," I sighed.

I reclined, floating on my back and entering complete relaxation. I closed my eyes and drifted on the soft current. It's such a shame our kingdom doesn't have a beach like this. Maybe if there was more water in Sarasaland we could waste water and have pools because this feeling of weightlessness is sensational.

A shadow leeched away my sunlight, blocking out warm rays of light. I looked up and Bowser stood smirking, "You look like a mermaid floating in the water like that."

I laughed, "Um thanks? I think that's a compliment. Anyways, do you know why this water's so warm? It's like being in a bath. Even the Peach Beach's ocean water is cold."

"Well Ms. Mermaid, this whole beach sits over a chain of volcanoes. Pretty neat huh?"

"Ah I see."

I stood up, cool air leaving tingling touches against my skin. An idea popped in my head and I smirked; I was going to get that jerk back for all his crazy comments, "Hey Bowser!"

"Hmm?"

Just as he turned around, I sent a wave of water into his face. He spluttered, hurriedly wiping his hands across his face. I burst out laughing at the now sopping wet king. Once he finished wiping his face, I saw telltale smoke wafting from his nose as he glared back.

Then his anger shifted into an impish expression and with a large body slam, he sent a massive wave in my direction. I shrieked, the force of the water sent me rolling head over heels. I surfaced, spitting water and wiping hair out of my face, I heard Bowser's amused laughter.

Oh, game on big guy, game on.

"You want a piece of this!?" I laughed, "I'm going to kick your ass!"

He chuckled, "Such a shame I gotta do this to you princess..."

A thick red eyebrow was arched as his eyes raked over my figure, "And yes, I wouldn't mind some of _that_."

I blinked, "Huh? What are you talking about—?"

He sent a wave right into my face. I launched into a belly flop and sent a wave back at Bowser and was rewarded with salt water flying into king koopa's mouth. Immediately we launched into a water fight, sending splash after splash at each other. In the middle of our water fight, Bowser must have been fed up with the ass-kicking and stomped over.

"No! Stop!" I laughed, backing away, "You're cheating!"

Grinning, he made a show of licking his lips. I screamed, laughing and flailing in the water as Bowser wrapped his arms around me and lifted me over his head like nothing. I squealed, screamed and kicked but nothing could break his hold.

"Let's talk this over before you do anything crazy!" I laughed.

"Oh no, it's too late for that my little mermaid," he growled, "After that last aquatic pimp-slap to the face, I've decided to stop playing fair."

He went deeper into the sea and jumped into the water with a laughing growl, drenching us both. He surfaced next to me as I hacked out both water and laughter at his stupid antics. We looked at each other grinning stupidly. I could barely see him since my bangs were soaking and in my face.

"How about a truce?" I laughed, still coughing up water.

"And that would be?"

"How about we go on land now? No more water dunking."

"Sure. But there's one thing," Bowser said.

"And that is?"

"Last one on the beach is a shell less loser!" And with a mirthful roar he started towards the shore.

I laughed, "You're on!"

Once we both were back on the sandy shore, we had a sand castle building competition. I guess Kammy and Kamek had given us toy shovels and buckets before we left. I made the standard, boxy, four-turret castle which turned out well if I had to say so.

Arching an eyebrow in interest, I turned to see how well things were going for the king. I almost laughed; Bowser's castle was just a tall, shapeless lump of goopy wet sand. Of course both of us decided our own castle was better than the other. The only thing we both agreed on was that destroying the castles was way more fun than actually building them. In fact both of us used our favorite pro wrestling moves to take them out!

"Oh come on, let me bury you please?"

"No," he huffed, "It's stupid. What's the point of burying someone in sand!? Only losers get buried in sand!"

"It'll be fun!" I beamed, "If you're so worried about being seen as a 'loser' I won't tell anyone. It can be our secret."

He arched an eyebrow, "A secret huh?"

After several minutes of pleading, he finally gave in and allowed me to bury him in the sand. I laughed as I patted wet sand where only his head was visible. Just as I walked away to grab another bucket, he rose out of the sandy dune like a sand monster and grabbed me around the waist.

I shrieked as he ran, carrying me like a football and when he reached the 'in zone' he roared victoriously claiming a touchdown. By the time sundown rolled around, my hair was messy and windblown into a tangled matted mess and Bowser was covered in a layer of dried sand.

He had laughed, claiming my hair looked like a furball and I sniped back, saying he looked like a sand monster. After all the joking and play fighting aside, we sat next to each other as we watched the waves of the ocean gently recede and crescendo. As the warm wind blew, I moved an irritating strand of mahogany hair behind my ear.

"So," I said, my head still swimming from our fun day at the beach.

"So?" he echoed, grinning down at me, razor-sharp incisors bright in the orange glow of the day.

"You know when two people look at the sunset together on a beach, " I grinned at him, "you have to talk about something deep."

Bowser chortled, "I've never heard that one before."

"Then you clearly haven't read or watched any romance."

"Clearly I haven't."

"Hmm," I wrapped my arms around my knees, staring off into the reddish-purple horizon, "We can play twenty-one questions if you want?"

"What's that?" he grunted.

"Well, you basically go back and forth and…ask each other questions," I laughed at the befuddled look on his face, "Watch, I'll go first. So what's your favorite color?"

Bowser arched a dubious eyebrow, "What a weird question…I dunno red or something?"

He seemed to catch on, "Why, what's yours?"

"Turquoise actually."

"Really? And yet all you wear is yellow. I'm convinced you and Peach own a monochrome wardrobe."

I shrugged a single tan shoulder and grinned, "I have plenty of different colors. Besides I don't choose my outfits, my advisers do."

"You can't choose what you wear!?" Bowser quirked an eyebrow skeptically, "Weird. Is this another one of those stupid, silly human royal law things?"

I laughed, "Actually it kind of is. Same with the way you act and speak. You're taught what's proper and what isn't."

"It's damn stupid if you ask me."

I laughed at his blunt response, "Oh yeah, I totally agree!"

"Hmm," Bowser smirked, closing his eyes, "Well if you could choose, how would you dress?"

"Well..." I tapped my chin, looking past Bowser's curious face, "I'd probably just wear my sports clothes. A top and a pair of loose shorts. Honestly dresses and I don't work out too well."

"And you can't wear shorts on a daily basis because…?"

"Because real ladies wear dresses," I over-exaggerated batting my eyelashes before rolling my eyes.

"You know while you're here with me," Bowser grinned, "you can wear whatever you like. In fact, I don't ever want to see that yellow abomination ever again."

I laughed, "Deal!"

"Okay my turn," I had to ask the question that had been in the back of my head for awhile, "Why me?"

"Hmm?" he turned to look at me.

"You could have kidnapped Peach like you usually do. So why me this time around?" I frowned a bit as I continued to think about it, "Besides aren't you madly in love with her?"

"Uh…" an explosion of blush rose to Bowser's face as he looked away.

In our friendly sporting tournaments Bowser had tried to beat Mario, hoping to show he was the 'better man' for Peachy. I remember once when I was visiting Peach, Bowser stood below her balcony playing a guitar to serenade her.

I had laughed so hard at his terrible voice and pissed Bowser off. He snapped the guitar over his knee and had scaled his way up the building and whisked Peach away. Both his voice and musicianship had sucked badly but if he wasn't trying to take over the Mushroom Kingdom, then I might have thought his gesture was nice.

I saw the clear discomfort my inquiry had caused, so I decided to let him off the hook just this once. Let's go back to safer grounds, like talking about politics and not romance and feelings.

"You said you wanted an alliance with a human kingdom," I nestled my toes deeper into the dark sand, "So why Sarasaland? We're nowhere near as prosperous or affluent as the Mushroom kingdom. I'm more than aware you know that."

Bowser stared at me for a moment before he looked away, "Well maybe sometimes we all want to do things that aren't expected of us."

I continued to watch him as he spoke, "If I tell you the reason, you're going to think it's...stupid."

My head snapped up, "Just tell me."

"Let me think about it. Hmm. _No_."

"Oh come on!" I laughed, ribbing his sides a bit, "I'll...answer whatever question you like."

The red of Bowser's eyes flickered like flames, "Really?"

"Yes," I smiled, "Now spill."

"Fine. Well," he scratched at the back of his head, "Ever...Ever since I saw you at one of the sports tournaments, I've wanted a reason to meet you. See? There. I said it."

I blinked, stunned at his admission; King Bowser watched me play in a tournament!? Which one I wonder? Maybe the Mario golf tournament or the tennis tourney? I've played a couple of games against him in the SuperStriker Charged club league. But when did he actually see me play? I feel like I'd notice if King Bowser was in the stands somewhere. It's pretty hard to miss a koopa _that _big.

"Wait, wait you watched me play?" Curiosity colored my voice, "What sport?"

Bowser smirked, "Does it really matter? I first wanted to meet you after the Mario tennis tourney. Anyways I thought you were a pretty impressive competitor and wanted to meet the so called tomboy of Sarasaland."

"Wow, that's really cool you think that," I breathed softly, suddenly feeling embarrassed. Oh Stars he had watched me play tennis? That was the sport I notoriously looked the worst in!

I had a great serve and decent amount of power but at the end of every match I was always soaked with sweat, grimy and filthy. I've seen the video feeds of myself and I winced every time I watched them; my hair was frizzy, shooting out in every direction and usually I had some kind of dirt smudged over my face.

If _Bowser _thought I was a good competitor then that really meant something. My face glowed with blush; that was probably one of the nicest things I've heard someone say.

"That's sweet of you," I beamed at him.

"Yeah? Well your backhand is pretty sweet too," he grinned, "After seeing you play tennis I had to see how you played in the SuperStrikers Charged league. Do you remember when I played against your team? Last summer? We had a match during the playoffs. I was pretty rough but you were ruthless. 2-0 loss but you made my team work for each of those goals."

I remember bits and pieces of that game, like the major peptalk since my players were freaked about against playing the 'great King Bowser.' It was always a big deal for _any_ of the teams to play against Bowser's team. They were one of the top-ranked teams in the league and were notorious for their vicious game play.

I recall being in the stands for one of Weegee's games when he played against Bowser's team. I thought DK and Wario played rough but they had _nothing_ on Bowser and his blood-thirsty squad. Luigi's poor team was shoved, elbowed and I swear one time Bowser even punched him across the face. By the end of the game, Luigi had a black eye, a busted lip and was completely filthy.

In his Superstrikers uniform with the added claws, Bowser looked even more imposing if possible. 'Hell in a shell,' as one of my teammates had described him.

"Come oooooon," he croned, smirking, "You remember when we played against each other right? Right? We scored one goal each half; I _smashed _a shot from half field and Junior scored a pk. And when we shook hands at the end of the game I..."

A memory suddenly shot into my head, "Y-You kissed my hand..."

He smirked, red eyes and mane aflame under the glowing sun.

I narrowed my eyes and thought deeper. I vaguely recall playing against Bowser and now that I think about it, it was kind of interesting. Bowser's team was very, oh what's the word? Quirky?

Every time I touched the ball, Bowser and _only _Bowser would come after me. It was as if the rest of his teammates had no problem roughing up my fellow members but they more than obviously steered clear of me.

The whole game Bowser was my mark and we played a pretty physical game. For the game's duration we were shoving and muscling each other. I remember having to ice all my bruises after such a tough game. But truthfully while the game had been tough, it was fairly played.

Bowser—while playing to win—didn't inflict unnecessary damage. Even when we shoved and pushed each other, there was no debate about if Bowser held back. He could have easily thrown me clear across the field with one hand.

The same can't be said for Mario, who he basically tries to kill in each match. I mean really, how do you explain when Bowser picked the said hero up and threw him into the electrical fence?! But against me Bowser played a respectably fair game, unlike Wario who had no problem body slamming me into fences.

And don't even get me started on games against Waluigi. I shuddered at the thought. He was creepy, disguising his advances as just 'playing the game.' Yeah okay buddy, where in the SuperStriker rule book does it say that it's legal to grab someone's ass!?

Bowser's chuckle roused me, "What's with the look on your face? You look like you want to murder someone."

"Oh geesh," I groaned, "I was just thinking of all my games I played against Waluigi. Ugh," I shuddered again.

"Waluigi…" Bowser spoke pensively, "…Can't say I remember that name very well…"

"Oh he's Wario's younger, taller brother. You know Wario right?" At Bowser's acknowledging nod I continued, "Well Waluigi is the tall guy that's usually with him."

"Okay. So why do you want to kill him?"

"Because every time I play against him, that guy's always trying to feel me up or something," I blurted out, feeling a bit embarrassed for admitting this, "I've punched, smacked, kicked him but it's like he's a masochist or something! It only makes him worse!"

Bowser narrowed his eyes as I continued, "And then after one game there was one time where Toadette and I found him in my locker going through my stuff. That _creep_ was trying to go through my clothes!"

"Sounds like he needs an ass kicking," Bowser said pensively.

"Yeah, I'll do it," I growled.

Bowser chuckled, shaking his head, "Oh no, not from you Flower. That guy might enjoy it. So here's the deal, next time he tries anything, you tell me and I'll deal with him."

I frowned, "But I don't want you to handle my problems. This is between me and him."

"Friends help friends out right?" Bowser smirked at me.

I sighed, "Yeah…that's true. Okay, I'll let you know then."

"I'll set him on fire if you like?" Bowser asked too casually, which made me laugh, "Does he try anything with Peach?"

"No," I huffed, "Guess I'm just _super_ special to have Mister Creepy Mc Geepy perving on me."

Bowser looked very amused, " 'Creepy Mc Geepy?' "

I shrugged, smiling at him. He straightened up, "So, can I ask my question you've got to answer?"

I laughed, "Oh Stars. _Please _don't let it be anything crazy."

He chuckled, "It's not anything too bad. I just wanna know if you would...let me touch your hair?"

I blinked, "Wuh?"

"Your hair looks so soft...Koopa manes are strong and tough...So can I touch?"

He looked earnest, maybe even a bit eager. What a strange request, "I...guess if you'd like."

A large claw gently touched the side of my face, fingering a strand of my curly reddish hair, "Your hair wasn't like this when we first came to the beach but now it's squiggly."

I laughed, "Curly? Yeah. The water makes my hair curl."

"I think it looks better squiggly," he said nonchalantly, "It's soft, smooth like silk. I like it."

_I like it. _He had growled that statement. I don't know why but my cheeks glowed with blush, "Thanks..."

We sat in silence a bit before I fired off my next question, "Uh…do all Koopas have bodies like yours?"

His head snapped up as my face flamed at the awkward question, "I-I _meant_…like I t-thought originally you couldn't remove your shell. So uh yeah…are all Koopas fleshy like you?"

Bowser snorted, blowing out smoke from his nose, only this time he looked amused, "I will answer that retarded answer with a yes."

"Oh okay."

"So my question right?"

"Have at it."

"Okay so…do you have any guys you're into?"

" 'Into?'"

"Yeah like you think they're hot."

This time I busted out laughing. Maybe it was funny since it was Bowser asking if I 'thought someone was hot.' I didn't even know 'hot' was in his vocabulary.

"At the moment no," I grinned, "How about you? And don't you lie and say no. I bet the powerful, king koopa has droves of women _pining_ for his attention."

His mouth twitched as if he wanted to smile, "Hmm maybe. But I get the feeling she's too dense to even know it."

"Eh? I'm sorry it's like that but that's how things go with the attraction right? One person likes what they see and the other is just damn clueless riiight?"

He looked down at me incredulously, "…Right."

I shook my head, thinking of the koopa king's interest. It was probably Peachy, a regal, beautiful girl with a killer smile. It was _so _obvious Bowser had a thing for her. And Peach was probably clueless. She was intelligent but sometimes she was the biggest airhead.

It's such a shame Peach was into Mario and vice versa, 'cause once you get to know Bowwy, he's actually not that bad of a guy. That is if you can tolerable his insufferable smugness, greed, and maximum self-absorption issues. Heh yeah I'll put in a good word for him with Peach.

"So then you're not into that…" Bowser sneered a bit, blood-red eyes smoldering, "that _Luigi_ guy?"

"Lulu?" I swore his eyes flashed for a second, "Nah we're just really good friends, almost like sister and brother really. He's a really sweet guy but…he's just...Oh I don't know how to explain it."

Bowser bust out laughing, "He doesn't have the _balls_ for ya that's what it is!"

"…Um…"

"That kid is such a wuss its' not even funny. Heck I bet even Kammy could whoop him in a fistfight!"

"Hey!" I may not be romantically involved but Weegee was still one of my best friends and no one bad talks my friends.

Bowser grinned, still laughing lightly, "I _knew_ he couldn't handle you. You're way too much for a little _sissy _like him. I bet I know who would wear the pants in that relationship."

"Let's just go to new territory here," I frowned, not liking the way he spoke of Weegee.

"Okay fine," Bowser rolled his eyes even though he looked pleased, "Well I've got a boring meeting I have to get to anyways. Let's go before I just decide to ditch altogether."

I rose to my feet laughing, "Ditching!? Oh come on King Bowser you must remain a dutiful king!"

"Those idiots don't even need me there the majority of the time," he rolled his eyes, "They just want me to yeah or nay stupid stuff. Kammy or Kamek could take care of it by themselves. But nooo, just wanna pile up more crap onto my plate."

As we approached the clown car, Bowser tossed a plush towel my way. I hummed a tune to myself as I dried off my arms and legs. I noticed something strange. As Bowser was using his own towel, he was trying to appear like he wasn't watching me.

Self-conscious, I blushed and hurriedly toweled off. Bowser squeezed into his massive shell as I slipped on my powder-blue dress and silver sandals. Again I let Bowser lift me into the clown car and as I endured more jokes about flashing people. Hmm I see this is something he's just not going to let me live down.

The sky was lined with thick ribbons of golds and pinks by the time the clown car landed within the castle grounds and just as we were headed to the castle, Bowser took my arm within his massive claws. I glanced at his hand then met his eyes curiously.

"I…had a blast today," he beamed.

I smirked, "Today was pretty fun for me too, King Bowser."

"Tomorrow I'll take you back to the Mushroom kingdom. And I know you think everyone's freaking out since you've been for a few days but don't worry. I had Kammy write a note to Peach saying that you…took a walk on the beach."

"'Took a walk on the beach'? And that's supposed to _really_ explain why I've been gone for two days?" I arched an eyebrow, "Well I guess technically today I did…but for two days?!"

"I'll have you back in the Mushroom Kingdom by tomorrow," then he grinned, carelessly gesturing a clawed hand, "Scouts promise or whatever the hell you humans say there."

Laughing I shook my head, reddish-brown curls aglow in the setting sun. His eyes studied the red blaze of my hair, "Nah it's okay. Just send me to Sarasaland, I'll just call Peachy and Unc and tell them I'm back home safe and sound."

"I'll have Kammy take care of that then. When you return to Sarasaland you better not forget about me," he growled playfully, "Or I'll come back and kidnap ya again."

I chuckled, "Hmm forget about a huge green turtle? I dunno if that's even possible."

"King Bowser, it's good to see you're back," Kamek chuckled as both he and Kammy flew over, "We were wondering if you'd ditch this next meeting."

"Yeah, I _should _ditch that damn meeting," he growled, "It's gonna be a huge waste of my time."

"My lordship welcome back and—" Kammy bowed her head then looked in my direction, "Oh lady Daisy, how was your day?"

"It was awesome!" I beamed.

"Well met," she nodded her head before she glanced at Bowser, "The council awaits your presence sire."

"And they can keep _on_ waitin' till I'm good and ready to appear," he sneered, smoke smoldering from the back of his throat. His expression changed, softening up a bit when he looked down at me.

Kamek shook his head chuckling, "Keep your shell on your wickedness."

Bowser grinned, "I have something I wanna give you."

Almost as if it were planned, Kammy waved her scepter in an arch and a present materialized into my hands. It was green and wrapped with a pretty blue bow. I shook the box a little bit, trying to see if I could figure out what was inside.

"Oh Bowser you shouldn't have," I beamed at him before I all but shredded the wrapping into nothingness.

I popped the box open and grinned happily, excited to see what lay inside. I shuffled past the tissue paper and pulled out a trinket that was as big as my hand. I looked appalled, "_You_ gave _me_ a picture of…YOU!"

The picture was completely cheesy and totally overdone. It was a close up of Bowser's face with him posing 'dashingly,' resting his chin on his hand and arching an eyebrow that was supposed to be charming. And to put the cherry on top of all this cheesiness, Bowser had signed the picture like a celebrity.

I suddenly wanted to knock his teeth out for this.

"You should be happy to have someone so handsome to gaze upon lovingly," Bowser looked as if he wanted to bust out laughing.

"Really Bowser, _you shouldn't have_," the king koopa laughed.

I was shocked. He had given me this picture of himself. I thought he was arrogant, but I didn't know it extended to this level. Yet it was utterly and completely Bowser. Shaking my head I sighed, "You really are a brat you know?"

"Not as big of a brat as you are. Now here's my _real _gift to you."

He replaced the photo with a miniature Bowser stuffed doll. I laughed, studying the only image of Bowser I thought was cute.

"This is adorable!" I beamed.

The Bowser plushie doll I held had chubby arms and legs and had cute, huge beady red eyes. Granted the toy still had curved horns just like the king koopa it was modeled after, but the plushie's horns were cutely too large for its head.

"Do you…like it?"

"Yeah! It's darling! Thank you."

Just as I turned to leave, Bowser cleared his throat loudly. I spun to face him with a sigh; _now_ what is it?!

"Yes!?"

"Before you go aren't you gonna hug me?" he extended his arms with a smirk, "You did it yesterday night."

I flushed a bit, "Well that was different. We had a formal dinner and…"

"As friends, I think it should be a new way to cement our friendship." He wiggled his eyebrows at this statement and grinned, "It'll be good for building political allies…"

I felt my eye twitch in irritation, "Fine, let's hug it out. The sooner we do it, the sooner I can send your ass to that boring meeting."

Bowser's smile promptly dropped.

I smirked.

Daisy one, Bowser zip.

Bowser took a thundering step forward as I went in to hug him. Yet again I experienced an odd sense of protection and being safe as his massive arms engulfed me. A soft rumbling in his chest flooded my being. Now that I thought about it, maybe it wasn't growling but purring?

But that can't be right; King Bowser purring?! I felt a claw of his brush over my back gently and I pulled away from him smiling. What I learned from my stay here was that Bowser didn't 'do' smiles, smirks yeah but most certainly not smiles. Unless they were cruel or mischievous, then he sent those my way a lot.

But I think when he was happy, his eyes did all the communicating. It was like they were brighter, lighter. Also whether he knew it or not but when he was content his tail wagged a bit; something I thought was a bit on the cute side.

"It was fun staying with you Bowser. I'll have to write you."

"…Yeah write me. 'Cause I'm sure the guards will be _thrilled _their princess is receiving mail from King Bowser," he huffed sarcastically.

"You'll be creative enough to think of something," I sent him a wink before I headed back into the castle.

"Wait, princess."

When I turned around, he was right behind me. Before I could make a move, he took my hand within his and pressed a kiss against my thin wrist. He winked, "Rest well princess."

His grin grew at the sight of my reddening face.

Daisy one, Bowser one.

* * *

><p>It was a few hours before midnight and the princess had already retired to her quarters for the night. While princess Sarasaland slumbered, the King Koopa idled in his luxurious office furnished with expensive silk décor. He sat behind his polished marble desk thinking. As he glared at the stone wall before him, he tapped his claws against the stone restlessly.<p>

He pressed the call button under his desk and within a matter of seconds his two trusted advisers materialized. Kamek and Kammy both bowed and with a lazy flick of a claw, he motioned them to stand.

His two advisers had raised him through babyhood even more so than his own father. Kamek had served as the chief adviser to both Bowser's father and grandfather. Originally Kammy had been hired as nothing more than a caretaker for Bowser; King Morton—Bowser's father—honestly didn't view women amounting to anything more than caretakers or things to warm beds at night.

However in his rebellious teenage years Bowser had come to realize how sharp, professional and smart Kammy was. In a sea of idiotic kiss-asses and sycophants, Kammy was an obvious jewel. She was punctual, professional, pragmatic, and stoic.

She didn't do that girly 'I let my emotions run me' thing but she was utterly and completely logical; calculating even. And she was one of the few people who had enough of a spine to correct him. So once his father had keeled over and Bowser was crowned king, one of his first moves had been to appoint his wise caretaker as his second advisor; one of the highest ranking females in the Darklands.

"King Bowser you've summoned us?" Kammy spoke crisply.

"Hag you know you don't gotta call me that when we're alone," Bowser smirked.

"Protocol is protocol your nastiness, unless it displeases you greatly," Kammy replied with a sniff.

With a chuckle Bowser shook his head; since his advisers had known him from day one, there was no needed pretense of a furious, almighty koopa king with them. But Bowser supposed ever since he made Kammy his advisor, she took the job far more seriously than Kamek. After all as a female superior she had far more scrutiny.

"Bowser how can we help you today?" Kamek grinned, ignoring Kammy's hard look she sent him.

"Geezer, Hag," Bowser crossed his arms as he leaned back in his chair, "I need some...advice."

If he had to label someone as his best friends, then he would begrudgingly list Kamek and Kammy as those people. Maybe they were even family; Kammy had wiped his snot and tears as a youth and Kamek had guided him to navigate through those awkward teen years.

"How can we help you Bowser?" Kamek smiled paternally at him.

Bowser furrowed his brows in the telltale symbol of frustration. Kamek looked at the young koopa king; sometimes he wondered what had been wrong with the late king. King Morton was a koopa who had willing forsaken a relationship with his son to expand the Darklands empire.

While King Morton had been ruthless, making those who opposed him suffer, he had greatly expanded the wealth of his empire. But this all occurred at the expense of having a loving relationship with his son. No matter how much he feared his ruthless king, Kamek still thought how Morton made a terrible and rather irresponsible mistake there.

Being able to watch, guide and raise Bowser from babyhood and into adulthood had been one of his joys in life. In fact the elderly magikoopa saw Bowser as somewhat of a son. Even now, he was sure Bowser had called Kammy and himself in for familial advice. And Bowser only went to them for the truly important advice.

"I've got Princess Daisy resting within the walls of my castle," Kammy swore there was a note of pride in his voice, as her king even puffed out his chest a bit at the declaration, "Plans are going well so far so how do we not screw them up?"

Kammy smirked, "We've come this far. All our planning to get her near you has been successful. You had a great, fun night at dinner with her."

Kamek nodded his head, "You've also had a great day at the beach, where you had a small heart to heart with her majesty."

"Yeah true," Bowser grinned, "But how do I…"

The King halted in the middle of the sentence as his words died off in his throat. His close advisers were treated to a rare indulgence as Bowser's face glowed red and he adverted his eyes from either of them, "…You know? Get her to like me?"

It took a great deal of strength to keep the smiles from appearing on their faces. Even Kammy struggled to have her face perfectly straight.

"Sire we have created the perfect plan for you," Kamek smirked, "First you'll take her to the garden arena—"

"Garden?" Kammy spluttered, "We did _not_ create that idea! It is obvious that the princess, despite her name hates flowers. She loves sports and activity, and despises formality."

"And what do you know about girls Kammy?" Kamek smirked. Bowser shook his head, knowing he was trying to get a rise out of her.

And Kammy's flamed cheeks were a clear sign that Kamek's taunting was working, "Oh? Well gee, I don't know but maybe I _am_ one you blind idiot!"

"Could have fooled me."

"That's it you idiotic prick!"

Kammy was shrieking, wailing away at Kamek with her jeweled wand. At the sight of the spectacle Bowser grinned; both of them together were amusing as hell. With his elbow upon the desk, he rested his chin within his palm as he watched Kammy tug angrily at Kamek's robes. Even as a child he remembered speculating if they were ever going to be together.

Just as Bowser entertained the idea of them as a couple, a disturbing image of his old advisors making out came to mind. With a shudder Bowser decided to concentrate at the task at hand, "Okay enough you two, Kammy you smacked the hell out of him already and Kamek you've blocked plenty. Both of you stop."

Both advisors straightened their robes as Bowser continued, "If we're going to impress the princess, then I want this castle spotless…now what else can we do to make her see how damn sexy I am?"

"Well we're going to have to make her want to stay here," Kammy suggested.

"Yeah? How so?"

His female advisor smirked, "We ought to spoil her rotten and drown her in such a show of opulence that her stays here will feel like a miniature vacation."

Kammy watched happily, mentally patting herself on the back at the thoughtful gleam her suggestion inspired within her king's eyes. Bowser rubbed his chin in thought as he arched an eyebrow, "I'm listening…"

"I cannot even recall how many times the princess has claimed to 'hate' formal clothing," Kammy smirked, "Allow her to dress as she pleases."

"And perhaps we should find out her favorite products she loves to use," Kamek said softly, more so to himself.

"Meaning?"

"I mean that in order to keep her loving her stays here, we should stock up on her favorite things. Like her favorite brand of perfume, shampoo, sweets, sodas, anything."

"I understand," Bowser growled, leaning back in his chair as he pondered the suggestions, "Think I could hire a couple of detective boos into oh say… 'sneaking' into the Sarasaland Palace without getting detected?"

"I can look into that your cruelty," Kammy bobbed her head.

"And when she arrives here," Kammy was smirking, "She loves many different sports why don't you play some of them with her? Or at least arrange the servants to if your schedule is too full, your Nastiness."

"Excellent," Bowser grinned darkly, "I want her to hate leaving here. I'm going to hire the finest decorators and I'm going to have the best interior decorators…Her room is going to be nothing less than exceptional! It will be beautiful yet comfortable and damn elegant!"

Bowser smirked to himself as he let his imagination float away from the present. He could just picture creating a utopia for Princess Daisy, a paradise she would be hesitant to leave. Her room would be grandiose and exceptional, not quite as opulent as his own room, but it would be the finest any princess would live in.

While Kamek and Kammy were discussing—or better yet arguing—what things would make Daisy's stay more pleasant, the King Koopa reclined in his comfy chair. A rather silly grin appeared on his face as he allowed his mind to wander.

He imagined dazzling the desert princess and showing her a new world, a place where she could wear whatever she wanted, be whomever she wanted and be spoiled rotten. He pictured how her eyes would light up and how she would swoon at the way he could give her everything she ever wanted.

Bowser pictured the way those large, pretty blue eyes of hers would glimmer up at him in appreciation for all the hard work the studly, utterly masculine king had done for her.

'_Oh thank you Bowser, for all you've done for me my king,' _she would say to him with that big pretty smile of hers, '_If only there was a WAY I could THANK YOU…'_

Then his reply back would be in a voice that exuded pure sex and made women—especially Daisy—tremble in pleasure, '**I've got an idea or two…'**

Daisy's cheeks would flush prettily pink as she smiled cutely, but slowly their two faces would draw nearer and nearer until their lips met. Then in a flare of passion they would both wrap their arms around each other, kissing wildly as if there was no tomorrow.

_'Oh Bowser! Oh Bowser! Oh!' _She would be borderline moaning because makeouts with the king were _awesome_.

And as their crazy-hot make out session continued, the flames from the fire place—there was always a fireplace when something romantic happened!—would blaze and roar loudly, a mirror of their passionate display.

At the thought of his daydream, Bowser roared exuberantly with laughter all the while inciting skeptical looks from his advisers Kamek and Kammy shared one curious look with each other before they both shrugged.

Kamek chuckled, "Bowser I've got a few ideas, so here's what we'll do…If she's serving as the Sarasaland delegate to keep peace between the two kingdoms, then it's going to be her duty to spend as much time with you discussing business."

"And if she's successful as a delegate, she will come here as often as possible," Kammy was grinning hellishly, "So long as we promise to make a few treaties and business transactions with the Sarasaland Kingdom, she won't refuse you _eve_r."

"Sounds intriguing," Bowser purred, arching an interested eyebrow as he grinned, "So tell me more."

The trio leaned together for a group huddle. Heads nearly touching, Bowser listened intently as Kamek and Kammy spoke out their game plan to make the Sarasaland princess fall for their King.

* * *

><p>Peach tapped a single pearl-pink manicured nail against her cheek in thought. In the comfort of her own chambers, the usually regal princess was relaxed for the evening, dressed in fluffy petal-pink pajamas with foofy slippers.<p>

Hair tied back and face freshly scrubbed, Peach set a frothy mug of hot cocoa down as she studied the paper within her digits. For the umpteenth time she ran her eyes over the letter, perhaps hoping to see something that she had missed during all those other reads.

'_Dear Peachykins,_

_You're probably wondering where I ran off to the last couple of days. Just wanted to let you know I'm okay, and perfectly safe. I'm crashing at a friends house and I'll be back in Sarasaland by tomorrow. Thanks for letting me stay! Had fun with you cuzzo! Love ya!_

_~Dai_

Peach sipped daintily from her mug as she pondered a bit more about the letter; something just didn't seem right about this. The letter was written in a perfect cursive, something that instantly had the princess elevate a smooth eyebrow. Peach knew that her dear cousin's cursive—bless her heart—was quite deplorable.

In fact Daisy's handwriting in general was quite messy; letters loopy and lopsided, as if she didn't care how pretty her penmanship was. The second clue something about this fraud letter being amiss was the signature. 'Dai'? Daisy hated—no detested nicknames, and all but threw gigantic fits whenever someone tried to call her anything outside of her name.

So then, the letter was obviously not written by her spunky cousin. So then who…?

Peach bit her lip in fret; while the letter was delivered to the palace way before she was suspicious of Daisy's absence around the palace, Peach had visited the meadow her cousin usually ran off to when she was bored.

And while there had been no sight of her cousin, she had found only a single orange-colored stiletto that had been hazardously discarded in the grass. And a few feet from the shoe was one of those dreadful wrestling magazines she loved reading.

And now to put the icing on the cake, there was this letter. An errant shoe, a discarded magazine there were all redflags that promised Daisy was in fact, not 'perfectly safe' as stated in the message. Was she kidnapped? Stars, Peach didn't think someone as strong and as energetic as her cousin could be kidnapped. Her punches and kicks hurt so much…Even her amazing Mario winced once when Daisy had good-naturedly slapped his back.

Then Peach called Daisy's cell, only to realize that it was left on the bed in one of the guest rooms Daisy used during her stay. It had been two nights, and there had been no sign from her cousin. At least when she was kidnapped, the Mario brothers always knew.

Peach picked up her rhinestone toadberry phone with indecision on her mind; she didn't want to blow this thing out of portion if Daisy was indeed out on her own and perfectly safe, however if she was kidnapped, then she wanted to help her cousin.

Peach scrolled through her mobile phonebook and dialed the number, "…Hello Uncle? Yes, hi it's me. Oh, I'm fine thank you. Yes, the treaty and the jubilee went rather well! I'm glad the citizens liked—Oh! Stars, Uncle—there's something I would like to speak to you about…It's rather imperative I feel…"

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><p>Alice: Hey everyone! Thanks for reading! And keep reviewing! (blows a kiss) ^_^<p> 


	5. Orange: Family Fun Day

Alice: (meditating and siting crossed-legged ) I am not my reviews…I am not my reviews…

Ultrra: (sighs) Alice is this really necessary?

Alice: (opens one eyes) Maybe…I mean, how can I get readers to review more? We've got a ton of readers!

Ultrra: …Well, we're supposed to tell the readers about this upcoming chapter.

Alice: (stops)…Oh yeah. Okay. Well in this chapter, we get a brush with Daisy's dad, the King of Sarasaland. Emperor Sakuro. He's named after the flower Sakura, but in many languages an 'O' is added to make a noun masculine.

Ultrra: So that means the readers are going to have to deal with an OC?

Alice: (grimaces) Ugh yeah. And there's _nothing worse_ than bad…OCs. However, if Nintendo _actually _gave their characters some background story then I wouldn't have to make up a character for her father! Also Peach's father will eventually be mentioned, and Daisy's grandmother too.

Ultrra: So that will make three OCs then right? And Sakuro's name is a flower pun just like Daisy's?

Alice: Right-o, but like all good OCs, they'll be there to enhance the story and not ruin it. So Emperor Sakuro this chapter…Heh, although I've made Daisy's father.. (smirks) Delicious…

Ultrra: (disturbed)…Wait what?

Alice: Somehow I picture him looking like Byakuya. Mm~hmm very yummy. XP

Ultrra: (Even more disturbed) O…M…G…Did you just say he's yummy? The dude's a badass! How_ dare_ you ruin his...his... **_badassery!_**

Alice: LOL! XD Anyhoo, readers why don't you leave a ton of reviews! I promise a ton of reviews will encourage me to work waaaaay faster! ;D So anyways read, review and enjoy!

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo** **Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"This is good!" I shouted over the lashing wind and roaring propellers.<p>

With an effortless spin of the yolk, the clown copter descended smoothly, kissing the desert floor in a feather-soft landing. Bowser killed the engine, flicking several switches as I nodded my head in approval; he landed the hell out of this thing!

Impressed, I shot a grin his way, "You can really drive this thing, huh?"

My grin was reciprocated, "And that was one-handed. If you think this was something, you oughta see when I fly blind-folded."

I laughed dryly, rolling my eyes for added disbelief, "_Riiiight_. Well, thank you for the ride King Bowser. I can make my way from here."

"You sure? It would be no problem just to drop you off by your room."

I shot a disbelieving stare his direction; either this Koopa was mental or very disillusioned. He was King Bowser, a notorious good-for-nothing and one of the most iconic villains at large. What would Father think if we were seen together!?

"...It's fine. Guess I'll see you around..."

I gave a sloppy salute in his direction and started down the rope ladder. I struggled, grunting and cursing under my breath as the heel of my stiletto caught rope. I kicked my foot free and as I started on the next ladder rung, a large hand wrapped around my wrist.

With the strength of a single hand, Bowser gently lifted me from the ladder and set my feet on the ground. I peered up at him curiously and met a rather sharp grin.

"W-What was that for!?" I snapped, "I could have gotten down myself!"

Still grinning, he half-shrugged, "True. But I like helping a lady out anyway I can."

I held my tongue, wanting to lash out at him for treating me like an invalid. Instead I did the decent thing, "...Thank you King Bowser."

His expression softened marginally, "You're welcome princess."

I gave one last wave, which was acknowledged with a crooked smirk. After traveling a few yards the roar of the propellers came to life in a thunderous growl. I faltered; _he had waited for me. He waited long enough so the wind and sand wouldn't fly into my face..._

_Was King Bowser chivalrous?! It had to be a major coincidence..._

Unusually flustered, I continued on my path housebound. I was officially back in Sarasaland with the familiar dry heat, the scorching sun and the creamy sands. By now the clown car was a speck in the sky, growing smaller as we traveled in opposite directions.

These last few days had my head spinning, rearranging and challenging all the priorities I had been taught. King Bowser was our foe and yet he had showed himself as something other than villainous and cruel. If anything he was mannerly and gentlemanly, willing to even offer a ride to my door.

Which, while considerate, was completely illogical. The Mushroom kingdom and Darklands were on relatively good terms with each other—shocking right? He kidnaps Peach biweekly it seems—I can't really say the same with Sarasaland. I think the correct term to describe our relationship is a wary neutrality; you don't cross us and we won't cross you.

I was approaching the castle grounds and as regulation dictated, the guards were already encroaching my position. What? Did you think my guards were incompetent like those of the Mushroom kingdom? Oh _noooo_, us Sarasalandians are made of far tougher material than those cream puffs in the Mushroom kingdom—er no offense Peachy.

Unlike the Mushroom Kingdom who lived in a happy-happy fairy tale world, we of Sarasaland believed in using weapons, having a functioning military and not smiling at every person. The on-duty guards were wearing the telltale desert camouflage robing and deep black sunglasses that were standard issue for military personal.

The once stern countenances altered at my recognition, "Princess Sarasaland!"

"Yeah it's me Arturo, hey Jeff."

"Holy Stars princess we heard you disappeared! We've received word Princess Peach called the Emperor in nothing but fret and worry for you! She received a note saying you left the Mushroom kingdom for a stroll on the beach and _never returned_!"

"…Er yeah," I liked Bowser, so I wasn't going to feed him to the sharks and say that originally he had kidnapped me.

"You're okay princess? Despite Princess Peach's worries you look relatively sound and untouched. The Emperor will be pleased with your return."

Under the scrutiny of the two guards I smiled, "I'm fine fellas."

Arturo laughed, "Not surprising though. She's not some wussy powderpuff. Now follow us your ladyship, your father has been expecting you."

We traveled through the gates, cleared security and approached the looming Sarasaland palace. Built in the late eighteenth century it was a beautiful citadel made of pearly alabaster and sparkling white marble.

Our palace was Egyptian-like in craft; walls didn't exist to separate the palace from the outside, one simply walked into the large walkways. It felt good to be back; the familiar creamy alabaster stone pillars and marble flooring was comforting. The towering pearly Arabian parapets shone like moonstone under the bold sun's caress.

The soft, sweet familiar scent of honey incense blanketed the castle comfortably. All these things—the white stone, the sweet aroma and the strong kiss of sun upon my skin—all these memorabilia foretold I was home. I entered the throne room, beaming as maids and servants halted their tasks, crying out happily at my appearance. I was hugged and even ribbed by the palace staff.

"Welcome back princess!"

"How was your trip?"

"It was good!" I replied.

"Did you enjoy the Mushroom Kingdom?"

"Didn't skip anymore etiquette lessons did you?"

"_Ssh!_ Father's_ right_ there, y'know!" I hissed playfully.

I allowed the good-natured ribbing and after the cordial laughter and jokes were done, I headed to the throne. It was a masterful creation of carved white stone and graceful, long curving arches. Father sat perfectly still, posture immaculate and tall as I curtsied daintily, "Father, I am present."

"Come closer so that I may see you, my child," his voice was a soft purr.

"Yes sire."

I carefully lifted the hem of my golden gown and soundlessly trotted up the throne's steps. With one last delicate courtesy, I sat daintily at Father's feet with my ballgown pillowing around my bowed form. There was a soft shifting of Father's robes as he bent over to peer at me closely. Father was my polar opposite; where I was loud, boisterous and short-tempered, he was reticent, cool and calculative.

And to even drive a further divide between us, our appearances contrasted vastly. Where I was nothing but dark red hair and tan skin, he had silky long ebon locks and a wintry pale complexion. He was refined, sophisticated and beautiful as I was rough, indelicate and mediocre. It's no wonder why people always wondered how we're related.

Though the Emperor of Sarasaland was poised and tranquil, such traits were not a symbol of weakness and fragility. He may have been patient, taciturn and cultured, but effortlessly he could be ruthlessly cold, heartless with a frightening steely quality.

There was a good reason why citizens and monarchs alike dually respected and feared Father. Father's expression was perfectly neutral, "Daughter you look…truly magnificent. The guards said a beautiful young woman masquerading as Princess Sarasaland had come. They did you little justice in their description."

My cheeks grew warm from his praise, "T-Thank you Father."

"I am pleased my little flower has returned safely from…_wandering_."

He elevated an eyebrow as I stiffened; oh was I in for it.

"Yes…Father."

Father stared unblinkingly, eyes intense and cold as icicles; something tells me unlike everyone else, he didn't buy my story one bit. The Emperor of Sarasaland wasn't a man to be tested; an overwhelming presence of power embodied him in profusion and he had the rare ability to intimidate—powerful rulers, arrogant kings and even his own daughter if he wished—with nothing more than a corrosive, disapproving stare.

Damn.

"Would you _care _to explain your whereabouts, Princess Sarasaland?" he asked calmly, neatly folding his hands together in his lap. While his words may have sounded patient and polite, there was an all too obvious underlying edge, a frosted steel which transformed his seemingly polite inquiry into an interrogation, "I was removed from my itinerary a few evenings ago. Do you know why?"

I shifted away from his stare guiltily, "Erm…?"

"My niece had called in tears," with his heavily hooded eyes and deep voice, he seemed bored, yet I knew he was meticulously studying me, "she had no inclination about your whereabouts."

I twitched; Peach had called Father_ in tears_!? Ugh what a little worrywart! Bowser said he had left a note explaining I was perfectly fine and I had returned to Sarasaland safely. Well I definitely had to clean this up quick.

"I…went to visit a friend," my mind raced, rushing around in a blur, "Toadette, you know her?"

"Yes," Father's eyes squinted, "I am familiar with the young lady. She is one of many handmaidens to your cousin. However I find myself confused. Knowing she does not live far from the palace, I cannot fathom _why_ you were missing for three days."

Father's stare hardened marginally, "_Why_ were you missing for three days?"

Yet again I gulped, "I…uh…I hated Peach's boring etiquette classes. It gave me an out to that...?"

Covering for Bowser was hard. _Why_ am I even doing this!? I should tell him the truth: a giant, eight-foot Koopa king kidnapped me, kicked my ass in arm wrestling and we wrapped up the visit with a nice day at the beach together.

...

_Yeah, I'm better off with telling the lie. As if he'd believe any of that._

Even though Father's icy eyes narrowed, his smooth tone did not alter, "Princess Sarasaland your impertinence displeases me. It is a courtesy, let alone an_ honor_ that your cousin and her kingdom are gracious enough to help you sire lacking skills. And yet you flee from your responsibilities simply because you _'hate_' them."

I tried not to wince too obviously, "Y-Yes your majesty."

"Is that the honest truth? Is that the real reason why you gallivanted away from the palace? Simply to _'skip'_ those classes?"

When I nodded my affirmation, Father sighed with deep exasperation, slumping into the throne and pinching the bridge of his nose as if to ward off an oncoming headache. Please note this is usually what happens after one of my many screw-ups.

After collecting himself, Father sat up straight again, visible vexation staining his features. Most kids would be _happy_ if their parents were barely mad but oh no. Him being 'barely mad' was the equivalent of someone shouting and screaming, "Have we _not_ spoken _countless_ times about your ability or perhaps your_ inability_ to use sound judgment?"

Yep. We've had this talk about shrieking my responsibilities and duties to the crown hundreds, if not thousands of times before. I laughed nervously, "F-Father, it was just _one _class and—"

"_When_ the princess of Sarasaland is believed to be missing, I _will_ be in the war room, trying to figure out if we should send the military after you. I realize you do not enjoy the burden that comes along with the crown and I understand the responsibilities are suffocating at times, but this _is _your station, Princess Sarasaland. This _is _your reality. I do not expect to have this talk in the future anymore."

"…I'm sorry Father," I muttered softly.

With a deep sigh of resignation, Father rested his spine against the throne, as if the talk had drained him of strength. He was silent for a few seconds, eyes closed. When he looked at me again his anger was gone, "Very well then...You may take your leave princess."

"Yes, your majesty," I curtsied one last time and rose to leave.

I was halfway across the throne room when Father's smooth voice rose again.

"In the afternoon," I spun around. Father held a feather quill in hand looking over a royal document, "I would like you present for the kingdom trade meeting at two pm. As my representative, I would like you to dress keenly and to speak with regal eloquence befitting of your station."

"Yes sir," I threw in one last curtsy before I rushed out of the throne room.

* * *

><p>So after getting grilled like sizzling Koopa kabobs I began to prep for the meeting. Since I had little interest in choosing a dress—I usually wore the plainest anyways—I had my more style savvy maids select one. The maids' eyes glowed with delight and immediately they set to tearing apart my closet.<p>

They chose a deep purple, form-fitting gown made of silk and chiffon. The front was a lace-up corset and the skirt gradually flared out like a bell. As the maids fixed my hair they cooed and likened my beauty to that of my late mother.

Like seriously, that's probably the twelfth time I've heard that today. Did Wendy's Darklandian make-over _really_ make me look that much better? And all these comparisons to my mother? Granted I did inherit her reddish-brown hair and dark blue eyes but she was far more beautiful than I'll ever be.

I arrived at the meeting room, carefully peering around the door frame. Already the councilors were stationed around the table, diligently looking over the paperwork. Before I stepped into the room, I scratched all over; this dress was itchville!

_Ahh! Sweet relief!_

I opened the doors to reveal a table of advisers and the second I entered, they all rose to their feet, heads inclined respectfully.

"Princess Sarasaland you look beautiful!"

"Simply stunning!"

"You look just like the late Empress Rose."

"Why thank you. Well now that the pleasantries are out of the way, let's get this thang crackin'!" I laughed as I slammed my palms down onto the table with a resounding 'thud'.

I blushed at their vacant stares and hastily sat down. Well that probably wasn't the most dignified way to start a meeting. _Great move Daisy, you try to pull this crap knowing full and well Father will want a report about my conduct._

"Um…let's…uh may the proceedings begin," I said sheepishly, laughing a bit at myself.

Immediately everyone set to work, opening folders, powering up laptops, scanning files and unearthing documents. One of the elder toads, Toadlowe began to speak, "Princess I would like to report the news of trades between the Mushroom kingdom and Sarasaland if that is fine with you."

"Very well."

"Trades between the Mushroom kingdom and Sarasaland are flourishing," Toadlowe looked up from his report with a smirk, "But this is tired news isn't it?"

"Seeing as my _uncle'_s running the kingdom our trade had better be flourishing or he's not getting his birthday gift!" I laughed, having a few of the councilors chuckle, "Next report please."

"Your ladyship, trades between the Chocolands are quite stagnant," another elder reported, "They wish to trade for our spices and mortar in exchange for water."

I hummed thoughtfully to myself; trade with the Chocolands had always been stagnant because their ruler was a gluttonous, unreasonable bastard. I'd have to find a way to voice such an opinion without sounding so…crude.

"Okay. So what's the problem with that? They're willing to exchange for a good we need. We have a water shortage here in case anyone forgot."

The councilor continued, "While that is true princess, their asking price is a bit...unreasonable. For each gallon of water they want one thousand coins."

A groan of disbelief reverberated around the table. This statement made me recoil, "Ugh and how much water do we need to just fill up the four main wells around the kingdom?" I sighed.

"The architects have estimated at least five hundred thousand gallons."

"Great flaming Stars in Star Haven, that's just not happening on my watch."

A snifit clucked happily, "That's how I feel too your grace."

"Look we still need water, so how about we settle for fifty gallons from those bozos and somewhere we trade them in ginger, cinnamon, and desert root spices?"

"We'll look into that proposition my lady."

I looked at the next councilor, "Good, um Mr. Puffs what kingdom are you going to tell us about?"

The boo elder squinted at the documents in hand, "My report was filed on the trade dealings with the Darklands."

A second groan rumbled through the room; it was common knowledge tradings with the Darklands were nearly nonexistent, even worse than the Chocolands. The Darklandian monarchy wasn't interested in any of our resources; spices, crops, tools, special seeds, nothing. I bet their lack of interest stemmed from solely focusing on kidnapping Peach.

Mr. Puffs blinked then did a double take, "Um…this can't be right."

I sighed, "What does it say?"

"It says that," he wheezed disbelievingly, "T-that the Darklands _want_ to do business with _us_! E-even open a few chain shops in our kingdom!"

Mouths dropped to the floor and in a flurry of movement, everyone huddled around Mr. Puffs. I squinted at the document while others leaned in. One elderly toad even cleaned his spectacles to make sure he was reading correctly.

"That's the official Darklandian seal alright," Toadslowe spoke quietly, "This_ is_ real..."

"Reports state t-the Darklands would like to build irrigation systems and sandstorm shelters in exchange for opening new trade routes and enterprises between our kingdoms. To discuss new business investments and entrepreneurial actions, it has been requested by the reigning sovereign, Lord Bowser to have weekly conferences with…"

Mr. Puffs and others who could read the paper all slowly looked up at me, surprise and maybe horror upon their faces. I blinked, looking at the different faces, "…What? Why are you all looking at me like that for?"

"With _you_!" Mr. Puffs frowned, "King Bowser would like to have weekly conferences with you about commerce and overseeing the establishment of a new partnership between our two countries as…p-potential…"

This time I thought Mr. Puffs was going to have a heart attack if, that were even possible for a ghost. I frowned at him, "Possible what?"

"Possible…_allies_," he squeaked and the entire room went into frenzy.

Excited clamor filled the room as councilors glowed, imagining the potential benefits a Sarasaland-Darklandian alliance could foster. While the councilors chattered happily, elated at such a proposition, I moved to the head of the table, mind reeling with thought. The Darklands were offering us an alliance!

Having an alliance with one of the most powerful kingdoms would be so beneficial it's not even funny. This is _way _bigger than the willingness to buy our spices and set up a couple of shops in between two kingdoms. This could mean having a powerful ally in wars.

The Darklands were such a _friggin'_ military powerhouse they didn't _need_ allies to flourish. Heck, they were a powerhouse in every manner of being: a prosperous economy year-around, leading military power, leading revenues, growing scientific community. Whatever Bowser was doing over there, he was kicking some _serious _ass.

Sarasaland having the backings of the Darklanders…

I'm speechless. I snapped to attention and with a slam of my fist on the table, my subjects stopped and gaped. I know it probably wasn't the 'princessly' way to shut a room up, but it worked.

"So the terms are," I spoke slowly, "We allow commerce in our two kingdoms, I have weekly meetings with Bo-King Bowser and then if he likes what he hears, we can be allies?"

"What a splendid summary your ladyship," a Lakitu spoke, "What shall your decision be?"

"Well to be frank I think we'd be stupid to turn down this offer," I laughed, "We could be potential allies with the strongest, most prosperous kingdom!"

"With a kingdom that is prosperous year around," a second councilor said in awe.

"But my lady, you'd have to meet with _King Bowser_," Mr. Puffs trembled, "And we all know despite his great presence as a ruler, his character is…._questionable_ at best."

He had a valid point. Bowser was notorious for kidnapping my cousin and trying to take over the Mushroom kingdom through nefarious measures. But Sarasaland was going to be in turmoil; summer was a few months away and droughts were already plaguing my people. Could we really afford to turn down this premium offer?

My intuition burned fiercely over this. I can't explain why but I know if we turned this offer down, Lord Bowser—who _never_ went out of his way to offer business deals to other rulers-_will_ be insulted and could attack the kingdom. What Sarasaland had to do was quite obvious.

"If he wants to be allies then as the representative of Sarasaland I should be willing to meet with him and see how sincere he is. I'm willing to bet our two kingdoms can flourish together. I want to let everyone know I will do all in my power to make our new alliance flourish."

The council members spoke amongst each other nodding happily, clapping after my speech. Mr. Puffs presented the documents to sign and with a quick squiggle of my signature, I officiated the Darklandian offer. The council cheered, clapping and in the glow of their praise, I felt accomplished for doing something my father or even my father's father couldn't.

And that was getting a potential alliance with the Darklands.

Haha booyah!

* * *

><p>As per our agreement, I was in a carriage bound to the Darklands. I would visit every weekend to discuss commerce with King Bowser. It looked like my weekends would be spent in the Darklands now and while the idea of a new adventure excites me, I know that behind this excursion was the sobering reality an important alliance was hanging in balance.<p>

There was so much at stake here and when the council had shared this knowledge with father, even he was delighted at the prospect of a new alliance with the Darklands. He had praised me for making such sound decisions and hoped that I represented Sarasaland well across borders.

I couldn't screw this up.

I won't screw this up.

I was going to use every manner, every single polite custom I was taught. I researched, leafing through books from the royal archives about Darklandian culture just to make sure that I would respect their customs.

While the read was interesting, all our books were so outdated there was only one real notable fact I learned. The Darklandian fire-breathing ability had a deep significance. Attacking a foe with fire signaled the deepest level of outrage, fury and true disgust; huh, I guess that explained why Bowser shot fireballs at Mario.

In civilian culture fire-breathing held notes of honor and trust; governing officials signed treaties with fire-blowing and in marriage ceremonies both groom and bride blew fire before they kissed. Many of their customs I found fascinating, like when a new Koopaling was born, a new flame was lit and placed somewhere within the kingdom's borders.

It was a flame symbolizing their life and would blaze for the duration of their existence. And with the birth of a flame at life's genesis, the death of a citizen led to the extinguishing of their flame. The funerals for the Darklandian citizens even included an honorable flame dousing ceremony.

The book also stated only the person, their parents, spouse, and the reigning sovereign knew the location of their flame. I wonder where King Bowser's flame was. It was probably huge and located somewhere very majestic, like the top of a mountain? Inside a volcano?

Completely interesting!

"—Did you hear me Princess? Make sure to always stay in well-lit places."

"Huh? Oh yeah…of course…" I tuned in, trying to seem as if I had been listening to my coach driver's rant the entire time.

This 'warning session' had been going on for the trip's entire duration. I tried to ignore all the warnings from my coach driver about how 'dangerous' and 'lusty' Koopas were. I broke out into laughter at the 'lusty' warning though. I mean seriously? Who made up that lie?!

"You ought to have a guard protect you, Lady Daisy," the toad driver, Toss said, "I hear that Koopas cannot _resist_ human girls. Especially King Bowser and with how pretty you are and all…"

"Toss," I waved away his reproach with laughter, "_please_, I shall be fine. If King Bowser won't touch Princess Peach then I'm sure I'll be perfectly safe near him. And besides, if he tries anything, we all know I'll kick his ass."

"You sure you don't want to take one guard, my ladyship?" He asked, turning to look at me.

"No, in fact that might be viewed as insulting. I'll be fine."

The glorious, ominous form of the Bowser's keep loomed on the horizon with ominous prestige and a twisted brilliance. The stone architecture embodied the dreary gloom of the middle ages but held the awe-inspiring ambience of a modern fortress. The closer we drew to the magnificent castle, the more fearful my carriage staff became. The doorman almost slipped when he opened the door and I tried to hide my smile when a couple of Koopa guards grinned.

I waved the carriage crew off—they all looked so sad, like I was walking to my death. I spotted the telltale rich purple cloaks of Kammy as she waited with a practiced poise. She met me halfway and smirked, "Ah how nice to see you again princess."

"It's…good to be back," I smiled warmly.

"Before you see his grace, I have orders you must change your current attire," Kammy arched a skeptical eyebrow, "Why? I do not know but—"

I laughed, "So he _really_ isn't going to let me wear this anymore!"

"I quote 'Not while I breathe fire and have a…studly visage.'" Kammy replied still stoic, "Anyways, shall we be headed on our way? Your itinerary with Lord Bowser shall be quite busy."

"Yes let's go please."

I followed her into the warm castle. The ambience of the middle ages lingered with the elegant stone walls, looming Koopa statues dispersed through the halls and the lines of polished armor facing each other like dance partners.

A wall made of smooth stone held portraits of the Koopa royalty. Wow there was so many portraits! Was the entire Koopa royal line on this wall? The portraits must have been in chronological order, because at the beginning of the long hallway was Bowser sneering wickedly.

As we traveled farther, we passed Bowser's ancestors and it was obvious by the crackling paint and faded colors how some of the portraits were hundreds of years old. By the time we were at the end of the hall, we were at the oldest portrait. I squinted, trying vainly to read the plaque but this one wasn't written in English.

"Kaldvar Koopa," Kammy spoke, "The founder and first ruler of the Darklands circa 983 A.D."

"Wow! Bowser can trace his lineage from that far?!" I gasped, "Not even the Mushroom Kingdom monarchy can. The furthest their lineage goes is the 1300's. Sarasaland was established in 1725."

"Yes, the Koopa monarchy is very thorough like that," Kammy smirked, truly proud of the kingdom she served, "Now continue to step this way and I shall tell you a bit about our history…"

The shimmering silver door glowed like a beckon to my guestroom. When I entered, the chamber's furnishings were varying shade of turquoise and I laughed. I had been away for a few days and already it had been renovated!

"—Morton Koopa was King Bowser's father and rumored most cruel tyrant ruler of the Darklands' history. Yet it was through his leadership that the Darklands was as wealthy and prosperous as it was. And—"

The once gold and orange curtains, lacy table spreads, and bedspread were now replaced by silken turquoise and pale blue colorings. The room was lightly scented like azaleas, and I truly did like the new furnishings.

"—He was brilliant and truly a great leader, yet all of his subjects feared him. King Bowser learned from his father that he wanted not only fear yet the respect and adoration of his subjects to continue—"

I smiled softly; Bowser had listened to me in earnest. I padded over to the bed and ran an admiring hand over the soft comforter. I bet it would feel like sleeping on a cloud. I took the room in its entirety; it was beautiful, even more so than my room at home. It was created with a masterful combination of my favorite colors and managed to balance having a sophisticated yet casual flare.

"—Only then did King Bowser know his dynasty would be complete. If only he could—"

"Kammy?"

"The—Er—Yes?"

"This is beautiful."

She blinked, as if trying to hop out of her narration and back into reality. She adjusted her large spectacles and spoke. "Oh yes, his majesty thought you would appreciate these accommodations for your weekly visits," Kammy's grin only grew more smugly, "I shall give you a few minutes to dress properly and will wait outside your door."

The second my silver doors closed, I ripped open my suitcase and pulled out a lacy baby blue dress and a pair of black leggings. I donned silvery sandals and as promised, Kammy waited outside, tapping her fingers away on that tablet…thing.

"Kamek?" I asked as I looked at her.

Kammy smirked at me from high on her broom, "I thought you'd realize by now your ladyship that I have been _personally_ assigned by his majesty to oversee to your needs. Kamek is with his nastiness. Now let us hurry and find his lordliness."

We were en-route to the throne room. I was awed all over again, studying the see-through floor and the hypnotic receding and waxing of the lava below. The great stone pillars loomed tall enough to hug the ceiling wall snugly as the frozen Koopa statues sneered at each other in long lines.

Bowser sat on his throne and the sense of power roiled from his being. The throne's top rail nearly scraped the ceiling and the dark wood was carved into intricate grotesque patterns with the chair's arm rest shaped into sharp claws. Bowser looked impatient, frowning deeply as he tapped his claws against the throne in an irritated cadence. The glow from the lava cast intimidating, long shadows over his visage and made him look terrifying.

"You think they let her come?" Bowser asked his second in command softly.

"She'll be here in a second, Bowser," I heard Kamek's gentle reply, "Do not burden yourself over it."

Interesting; Kamek called him by name and not by title. I knew he served as an adviser but this clued me into a closer relationship. Just like with my family, only my dearest friends and closest relatives were able to call me Daisy when we were alone. Perhaps this applied to Kamek and Bowser as well.

"Then what the hell is taking so long!?" The irritated glare morphed into an unfitting, unsure expression . He ran a hand through his glorious red mane, "You don't think she's—?"

"_AHEM_!" Kammy cleared her throat loudly to interrupt whatever side conversation they were having.

Bowser growled, mane bristling as he prepared to tell off his subordinate for cutting him off. He realized I was standing beside Kammy and perked up with a grin. The shadows across his face made his mirthful smile appear cruel, "Well, well, look what we've got here Kamek," Bowser hopped off of his throne and started clambering forward with his usual air of cocky swagger, "we've got a rare desert flower in my courts."

It was too obvious when he brazenly looked my figure up and down. He grinned, "And I'm glad to see you've shed that dress of yours. If you weren't wearin' a crown, you'd look like a normal girl."

I huffed, "Well I was all but ordered to change, your _lordship_."

Bowser arched an eyebrow and rubbed his chin in thought, "Hmm, so what _else_ would you do if I gave an order?"

This time I let out a dry laugh, "Not a damn thing. So what order of business should we take care of today?"

I revealed a portfolio and looked up at him. Bowser raised his eyebrow even higher, "Business? What are you talking about?"

My mouth dropped, "What do you _think _I'm talking about?! You know…The whole treaty _you _made between the Darklands and Sarasaland?! The treaty where I come here once a week and discuss matters with you!?"

"So what's in there?" He pointed a beefy claw at the portfolio.

"It's a portfolio with all the specifications and agreements on the Sarasaland end of the treaty. The council and I—"

Bowser grinned, "Unless that portfolio is filled with _smoldering _hot pictures of a certain princess, then I'm not lookin' at that thing."

Confused, I snapped my mouth shut and frowned; what was going on here? He didn't want to discuss the ramifications of our treaty!? And did he say he wanted to see pictures of a princess? Who? Peach!? I heard loud, heavy steps walking away and I quickly looked at the king.

"Hmm," he scratched his chin, still smirking, "So…are ya comin' along?"

My eye twitched, "We're _going_ to a meeting right!?"

"It's Friday," Bowser continued to stomp towards the door as I hurried to keep up with his massive steps, "we'll take care of business _Sunday_."

"But-but…But!"

"Come on," he grinned and gently elbowed me in the stomach, "Live a little, Flower."

"_Flower!_?" I choked; what kind of nickname is that?! I know for a fact you're not supposed to give foreign delegates nicknames!

"Kamek, Kammy?" even though they were behind him, he didn't bother to turn around. Bowser gestured idly as he threw a hand into the air, "Watch over the keep yeah? Take names and kick ass if needed. We'll be back by day's end."

"Off to the games are we?" Kammy grinned, "We'll see to it things are in smooth running order when you come back. Also give the young prince my regards."

"Your lordliness, think you can stop by and grab some green apple cotton candy perhaps?" Kamek beamed cheerfully, "Or zapping kerokerocola!? They're quite delicious!"

"Look at this guy," Bowser grumbled, "Asking _me_ to bring _him_ back something. I'm _your _king, you should be getting me something, old timer! Anyways, watch the keep!"

"Of course your evilness," they both replied.

We traveled outside to Bowser's launch pad and there the crown car idled. His mechanic crew saluted and before I could climb up the stairs, Bowser stopped me, "Oh no you don't. I'm going to _personally_ lift you into this thing after what happened last time."

He shot a glare at his mechanical crew who visibly recoiled, "No free upskirts here. Those idiots aren't going to wish on the same star_ twice_."

I choked, blushing flagrantly; _wish on the same star twice?_! I shot an incredulous glare at Bowser. Could he be anymore crude? Like seriously!

"But I'm wearing leggings!" I said through gritted teeth, my face still flushed.

But apparently Bowser wasn't having any of that as he scooped me into his arms and walked to the clown car. He gently set me down before climbing in and starting the engines. He nodded at the saluting aircrew and before I knew it we were off into the air, soaring high above the Darklands.

Zipping through the clouds, the panoramic view was marvelous; the clouds looked like scoops of whipped cream and the sky shone blue with the brilliance of a sapphire. The Darklandian kingdom was spread out for miles, snaking and winding in dark blotches. Surprisingly, it was a bit greener and prettier than I originally thought. With the wind whipping through my hair, I turned to face Bowser.

"So where are we going?" I asked.

He glanced back at me and smiled, "We're going to see Junior."

"Who?"

"We're gonna visit my youngest kid Junior at his school. We're heading to the Darklandian Royal Preparatory Academy, figured since you want to do business, it's better you know a bit more things about me and knowing my youngest brat is pretty important."

"Oh! Okay!"

I reclined into a seat, thinking back to all the golf and tennis tournaments I had attended. I remember Bowser crashing the tournaments, trying to provoke Mario into a duel and trying to steal Peach away. I kind of also remember there was always a bratty, pint-sized Koopa in tow. I wonder if that was Junior?

Half an hour later we landed at a large set of buildings made of old, crumbling cobblestone and encircled with the curling tendrils of emerald and lime green vines. The towering turrets of old stone loomed over us like great stone giants. Speckled with wild growth and deep emerald leaves, these walls were a curious blend of organic and artificial coexistence.

As I ran my hand along the mildewing spire, fingers trekking over and into the crevices between cool stone, my curious digits found green patches of fuzzy moss and winding vines snaking up the side of the old spires.

The castle was enclosed by a large moat bathed with brackish water. The molding, rotting drawbridge definitely had a medieval feel to it. A crowd of Koopas traversed the area, heading to our same destination. As I walked beside King Bowser, much to my chagrin we were attracting a great deal of attention.

The majority of the citizens were several feet taller than I. I'd bet money Bowser was the most massive, most muscular Koopa by far and I probably looked absolutely puny beside him. My face glowed rosier by the second as the garden filled with hushed whispers and burning stares that felt hot upon my person.

Bowser seemed perfectly cool; he walked with an attention demanding arrogance, as if he owned the campus. For a Koopa he walked with a straight-spine and shoulders held back proudly.

He was a reigning king but he certainly didn't need a crown or a scepter to command respect. Maybe as a monarch, he was used to such open stare and admiration from his subjects. I on the other hand, wouldn't mind so much if I was being gaped upon by my citizens.

However, being a _tiny _foreign dignitary in a crowd of brawny massive Koopas, I don't think my paranoia was too far-fetched. I stepped a bit closer to Bowser as we continued to travel through the crowds and towards the school grounds.

The adjoining courtyard was filled with multiple statues of various Koopas. Some of the statuses were several centuries old by the way time had weathered away the statues.

"Wow, these buildings are huge! And they look so old! I wonder how old these statues are."

I stood toe to toe with one of the statues. I assume these were made to be life size as all the statues were two or three feet taller than I was. As I walked past the weathering relics, Bowser watched. The softest touches of a smirk appeared as he watched me travel past each statue.

"Yeah," his red eyes followed me carefully, "if memory serves me correct some of these statutes were built in the sixteenth century."

I gasped, "I don't even think Sarasaland was even established yet! _Sweeeet!_"

I stopped before a newer statue. Unlike its predecessors it still shone with a fresh sheen of polish and was unscathed by time's invisible tendrils. I stared at the imposing face, nearly mimicking the Koopa's fierce visage. Bowser came beside the said statue and glared in the exact same manner.

I laughed, "And I should not be surprised that _you_ of all people would have a statue here hmm?"

Bowser chuckled as he looked around, "Oh yeah, this place is nearly the same as it was back when I went here back in the day."

"You went here?"

"All Koopa royalty and children of elites do," he touched the walls as if he was observing fond memories, "It's the most expensive and most prestigious of all academies. Attendance here is a complete and utter status symbol to show you're bitchin'."

Bowser's eyes grew cloudy with what I assumed was recollection. I decided to step back and allow him a moment to himself, after all it seemed like he had a bunch of fond memories to relive.

"…Heh, I gave _so_ many wedgies and took a lot of lunch money here."

I looked at Bowser disbelievingly, "You really are such a brat."

"If you think I'm bad now, you should have seen me as a kid," he grinned.

_"Oh please_," I crossed my arms as I continued to walk by his side, "You're probably _exactly_ the same, only beefier and twelve feet taller."

"And more handsome," he threw in.

"Yes and more hands—huh! No I meant more…hairy! Yeah!"

He chuckled, eyes gleaming dangerously, "_Sure_ you did. You know Princess when you compliment me like that, I can't help but blush."

"Oh goodness," I laughed, "Okay _whatever_ your majesty."

"From now on, you'll call me 'your handsomeness'," he elbowed me in the ribs, "Right? Riiight?"

I chuckled, shaking my head. Out of my peripherals I saw Koopa heads turned in our direction. Yet again I was overwhelmed and terribly flustered by how many Koopas were staring.

"King Bowser," I whispered to him.

He frowned and turned to look at me, "Hey, didn't I tell you to call me Bowser? I think we're far past those crappy, tight-ass formal boundaries."

"Okay, well Bowser, haven't you noticed everyone's staring at us?" I huddled closer to him.

"Well of course," he grinned, "Most of the citizens are _awed_ by the sight of their studly, sexilicious king and they've probably never seen a human girl before either."

He must have sensed how uneasy I was because he took my shoulders into his clawed hands and spun me to face him. Surprised at the abrupt gesture, I could only blink back.

"You know what always works for me, Flower?" He was grinning, "Hold your head up, throw your shoulders back and strut like you own the damn place."

"That works?" I wheezed, trying not to laugh, "Sounds like the perfect recipe for looking like the ultimate idiot."

"Well if you're nervous now, you should try it."

I half laughed, "Oh stars…Okay then, only if you do it with me."

Bowser grinned maliciously, "Deal. Ready, one, two, strut!"

Just as his advice offered, I threw my shoulders back, set my spine straight and together we both strutted. Bowser pulled out all the stops and had a 'model walk' going. I wasn't to be outdone as I arrogantly tossed my hair back and strolled. Even though the crowd stared at us, we both continued to 'strut' making absolute fools of ourselves. The moment we exited the courtyard, we both fell out into laughter.

I wiped the happy tears from the corners of my face, "Oh Stars, I can't believe we did that!"

"Yeah but wasn't it worth it?" He grinned.

I sighed happily, "Yeah it was. I still can't believe you winked at that one Koopa."

Bowser's grin grew,"But did you see his face though when I did it?"

I laughed harder, "He was scared! Can you blame him!? I would have been too if you winked at me."

"Oh no," He purred, voice deepening, "I think you would have been charmed."

I smirked, "Oh shut it, King Bowser."

"Say that again and see what'll happen, Miss thing," he growled, poking my shoulder.

I wasn't one to back down, "Shu—"

We appeared in front of a large, grassy lawn. It looked like a carnival was set up; there were hundreds of colorful tents, cotton candy stands, popcorn stands, and even games and rides set up. Hundreds of Koopas and their children were milling around the fairgrounds.

"Wait here Flower, I'm gonna find Junior," and before I could rebuttal, he stomped off into the roiling crowd of other Koopas.

Bowser approached the moving swarm of citizens and suddenly the Koopas went into frenzy at the sight of their king. They were cheering, patting his shoulders and smiling up at him in obvious admiration.

So I wonder what this occasion is for? I touched the crown seated upon my head and wondered if I should go undercover as a regular citizen and not be a princess. But then again I _am_ the only human here, and I wonder if I'm known well enough here that trying to hide my identity would be ridiculous.

Maybe if I was Peach everyone would know who I am, but eh we'll see. I came across a huge banner. It read: "Welcome To Family Day!"

Family day hmm? So there's Bowser who's the daddy, Junior who's the kid. But where's their lady who will play the role of mommy?

…

…

_OH MY STARS!_

Was he planning on having me be 'Mommy Bowser'?! How audacious! How dare he do this to me and yet I followed him here gullibly like an idiot! He brought me to a 'family day function' without any prior warning, and was going to have me be 'mama Bowser for a day.'

How could I even pretend to be some Koopa child's mother? I was nowhere even near maternal or womanly. I could barely apply mascara or bake mushroom snicker doodle cookies without burning them to tar goop.

You know what, screw him being king! And screw being a Sarasaland diplomat, I'm about to give him a Sarasaland ass kicking version 2.0. The object of my ire appeared, making a marked path my way.

"_BOOOOWSERRRR!"_

He looked particularly slick; Stars I want to sock him in the face and hard. Just as I was within punching and combo-ing range, a small green blob darted out before me, "Hiya!"

"…Heh?"

I looked down at what looked to be a mini Bowser. He had beady dark eyes, a small round body and a huge smile. And he had horns! Tiny baby horns that hadn't grown in yet! Oh my goodness this little tyke is _adorable!_

I couldn't help but reciprocate his megawatt smile as I bent down to be face to face with him, "Well hey there big guy, what's your name?"

"I'm Bowser Junior!" he hiked a chubby thumb proudly into his chest, "I'm named after King Dad but everyone calls me Junior. What's your name lady?"

"I'm Daisy," I continued to beam at the cute lil guy. Out of the corner of my vision I could see Bowser standing beside us, keenly watching the interaction, "It's nice to meet you Junior, may I call you that? Or maybe BJ?"

"Yeah sure!" he nodded his head vigorously in a way only a child could, "By the way I really like the color of your hair. It reminds me of Koopa ketchup."

I laughed, "Well thank you Junior, I like your ponytail."

I stroked his ponytail and laughed when he purred. He shamelessly closed his eyes, enjoying my administrations.

"Okay that's enough you two," Bowser hissed, eying Junior with a funny expression, "The family competition will start soon."

I rose to my feet as Junior hopped around excitedly, "Yahoo! Let's go win it all!"

"That's my boy," Bowser smirked.

Junior looked up at me as he took my hands, "Miss Daisy will you be in our family today? Each year I've never had a mommy," he looked down sadly, "So we can never win..."

I looked at Bowser who only smirked and elevated an eyebrow in response. With a sigh I looked at dear Junior. This cute kid had the sweetest expression on his face…how could I say no? This year he was going to have a mom if I had any say in it.

"Okay Junior, I'll be your mommy," I smiled as he whooped happily.

"Thank you! Thank you Mama Daisy!" he chirruped, hugging my legs and prancing around happily.

As Bowser Junior ran off, screaming to any and everyone I was his mama, Bowser slid beside me with a smug look, " 'Mama' Daisy eh?"

I cut him a look from the corner of my eyes, "Oh by the way? You're _sooo_ in the doghouse for pulling this stunt."

"What? Why?" he laughed.

"Pulling me into this family thing without any warning whatsoever!" I crossed my arms and huffed, "Why I oughta maim you and roast you over an open flame!"

"Creative much?" he chuckled.

"No, I'm just very violent," I hissed.

We joined a large crowd of Koopas, both child and adult alike. Junior turned and waved us over to a spot he had preserved, "King Dad! Mama! Over here!"

As I traveled through the reptilian mass, I felt completely diminutive. They all were several feet taller and I couldn't even see the stage from where I stood. I could only see the unending mass of multi-colored, spiny shells. I heard the pitchy shrill cry of feedback from an electric system and I assumed the entertainment was to begin shortly.

"Need to see Flower?"

Before I could say a word, I was suddenly hoisted onto his shoulder, sitting far above the crowd. Blood rushed to both my head and face as I wobbled unsteadily upon his shoulder, "K-King Bowser!"

"I gotcha," I could tell he was smirking.

"Falling! Falling!" I cried, flapping my arms like a chicken.

Bowser clamped a hand on my hip and the awkward fight with imbalance ended. You know there's no way I could explain this to my father. The councilors and ladies of court would shred me into pieces if they saw me hefted on Bowser's shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

But hey, I can see now! A Koopa troopa was on stage wearing a glittering purple shell. He also had a matching sequin bowtie and a top hat. With a flourish the Koopa took a bow before he put a microphone to his lips, "_Ladies and Koopas, are you ready for this year's Family Bash!"_

The answering roar was nearly deafening. I swear someone in the crowd even blew fire. I wiped my forehead at the sudden waft of heat. If Koopas were blowing fires in this crowded area, maybe I wasn't too safe…

"_But first, we at Koopa Academy would like to give a warm welcome to the royal family! Will Lord Bowser and his family please come to the stage?_

If I thought the cheer was loud before, it was twice as loud as now. I covered my ears as Bowser set me to the ground. The king placed a hand on my shoulder and led Junior and I to the front.

Junior strutted all the way to the stage, over exuberantly high-fiving any of his friends he saw along the way. He hopped up the stage and before I could attempt to climb up myself, Bowser picked me up and leapt onto the stage with me in arm.

"I guess you're just not going to let me climb up anything anymore are you?" I hissed into his ear.

He laughed and whispered back, "Nope, you're so clumsy I can't even trust you."

"I'm not clumsy!"

Bowser laughed, "I've seen you fall over thin air. It's funny as hell!"

My face glowed red as I growled; just because my balance is nonexistent doesn't mean it's okay to call me a klutz! What a jerk!

"_Ladies and Koopas, the rooooooooooyal family_!" the announcer turned to us and motioned in our direction.

As Bowser and Junior roared, I waved at everyone weakly, chuckling nervously. The crowd seemed to have perceived my presence warmly.

"_As per usual, the royal family will blow fire as a signal of the beginning of our tournament."_

_Say what?_ The royal family? Does that mean I'm included!? Because last time I checked, I can't blow fire. Bowser caught my apprehension and he bent down to speak into my ear, "What's wrong with you Flower? Where's that cute smile of yours?"

"Bowser don't be stupid, you know I can't blow fire," I frowned, whispering into his ear, "I'm not a Koopa!"

Bowser grinned, "Well it's a good thing I'm such a mastermind and taken this all into precaution. After all, _my_ queen has to be able to blow fire."

I spluttered, "W-what!?"

The murmurs of the crowd died away and expectant eyes were on my person. Gosh, I'd like to see a non-Koopa blow fire too! I gulped, eyes darting around as my cheeks heated. What was Bowser thinking?!

Bowser took my hand, pulling me closer. I was surprised by the soft glow in his eyes,"Here drink this, it'll give you all the fire power your pretty little mouth needs."

I blushed, "Bowser…"

He handed over a tiny blood-red glass bottle. It wasn't any bigger than my pinkie. I looked at him one last time before downing the liquid. There wasn't much but it felt warm traveling down my throat.

It was heavy, similar to the effect of drinking liquor where your body flushed with warmth. Then something strange happened, my veins flooded with heat as if fire coursed through my body. My senses exploded, awakened with a new zest. I looked at Bowser, whose features were sharper and brighter. I looked at the crowd, their faces were more defined, as if I had picked up a magnifying glass.

The warmth in my body felt as if it were accumulating deep within the pit of my stomach. Eyes closed, I took a deep breath and felt heat roiling in my throat, slowly curling up to my mouth. The unnamed strength flooded my mouth, tingling. Junior gave a thumbs up as the king himself winked.

They knew I was ready.

Junior also took a sip of the flash tonic. Ah so Junior was too young to blow his own fire. Both father and son's smiles died away as they focused on their breathing. I felt the power in my throat swirling, growing as it waited anxiously for it's release.

"_Ready…"_

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, concentrating on my breathing.

"_Set…"_

The power was waxing, building to a growing crescendo. I was ready to blow my first flame. Bowser placed a hand on my shoulder and motioned towards Junior. I guess he had the first go.

"_GO!"_

Cheers raised as Junior blew his flame. The Koopaling had his eyes snapped shut, cheeks puffed as he spit out a mighty golden-orange flame. After seven seconds, Junior's flame went out and he grinned at the crowd. He did the robot in a celebratory dance. Looking for approval, Junior turned to his dad. The king, though stern-faced, glowed with paternal pride.

Bowser playfully punched Junior in the shoulder then gave him a super noogie. Afterwards I grabbed him and gave a big hug. The crowd's eyes shifted to me. I blushed at all the direct attention and even Junior was beaming at me, stepping away to give space.

I chanced a look at Bowser. He raised a playful eyebrow and grinned. I looked away blushing. With a deep breath I closed my eyes as the unnamed power churned inside of me. With a deep exhale, the building power exploded from my body.

The burning strength traveled straight from my core and flowed up to my mouth. The release of power ignited and I blew out a flame. I could barely register the Koopa crowd's loud cheers and catcalls as I concentrated on enhancing my flame.

It started out small, but slowly began to grow in both size and intensity. The color was a deep gold and shone like the sun. After several seconds, I started to feel light headed and my cheeks began to hurt. I slowed down until my flame went out.

I blinked, stunned at the revelation: I had blown fire from my very own mouth. My environment came back to life, sounds and colors returning as I remembered where I was again. Junior was hugging me, screaming out, "Wow Mama! That was great! That was great! You're strong!"

A larger pair of arms wrapped around me and I looked up at the king. I was so taken by the glimmer in his eyes I didn't realize he picked me up. Yet again he had a soft expression on his face. He leaned towards my ear and whispered, "I wouldn't have expected any less from my queen."

I blushed hard again, but smiled at the compliment, "T-thanks."

Then his roguish smile was back, "Now stand back and watch how the king breathes fire!"

He set me back on my feet as I moved to stand by Junior. Junior promptly wrapped himself in my arms and I held him. I watched the Koopa King close his eyes as his brows furrowed. The crowd was dead silent to give their king his concentration, I'm pretty sure we could drop a needle and we would hear it.

He took three deep breaths, and by the third he shot forth a large flame. His flame was huge! Even bigger than mine and Junior's combined. The crowd was at least a good twenty feet away from us, but even they moved back to avoid the reach of his flames.

His flames were orange, automatically hotter than even my best, and slowly his flame grew larger, brighter and more grandiose. The flame's color slowly sifted into red, then a sparkling blue. As he continued his breathing, the flame started to spark white and the crowd went crazy.

They cheered and whooped as his fire slowly transformed into a glittering, scalding white arch of flame. I thought it was beautiful. I have never seen fire so hot and potent that it became white. And yet Bowser was able to hold this fire for at least fifteen seconds, unlike my four and Junior's seven. Thusly glowing with pride Junior whooped and cheered, "Yeeeeah! Go King Dad! Go King Dad!"

The Koopa prince turned to look up at me, "Hey Mama Daisy, let's both cheer for King Dad too!"

"Are you sure he'll hear me? The crowd's so loud and I bet he's concentrating hard."

Junior nodded his head, his ponytail bouncing around, "Of course he can! He will really, _really_ like it if you cheer for him."

"Then I will! Cheer with me Junior?"

"Heck yeah!"

"Go King dad! Go king dad!"

"King Bowser! King Bowser!"

The crowd caught on to our cheer and suddenly the entire courtyard was filled with our chant. As the white flames sparkled, I could see Bowser's maw twisting up in a slight smirk. Even as he continued blowing a flame, he raised up a victorious fist and the Koopas roared in delight. His fire stopped and he joined his countrymen in a cheerful roar.

I jumped when even Junior threw his head back in a celebratory roar. Granted it was nowhere near as intimidating as Bowser's or the crowd of Koopas. I laughed, thinking of how cute it sounded until Junior lightly tapped my shoulder, "Come on Mama! You gotta roar too! It's Koopa tradition."

I laughed, "Okay then!"

It was frowned upon in Sarasaland for a woman to even raise her voice, but here it was encouraged to have a loud, strong roar. I wasn't going to squander this opportunity and be 'ladylike'. So I threw my head back and gave the meanest roar I could muster. Vaguely I felt Bowser wrap an arm around me as he continued his earth-shaking roar.

"_Ladies and Koopa!_ _THE RRRRRRRRROYAL FAMILY!"_

Another cheer broke out and both Bowser and Junior blew out one last flame. Laughing I narrowed my eyes and joined them in one final celebration.

"_Let the games begin!"_

As the crowd scattered to do various events, Junior hopped off the stage and ran to find a game to play. I went to follow him, but I felt a sudden grip upon my arm. I looked to see Bowser grinning at me. I met his stare and smiled up at him.

"What's up Mr. Flame king?"

Bowser grinned, his smile stretching to ridiculous lengths, "Perhaps now you'll actually believe me when I say that I'm a godly, studly Koopa."

I laughed, "Well I can't deny it! When you blew that flame that was pretty awesome!"

"True, but I've been breathing fire my whole life. You on the other hand," he shook his head, "You blew a flame on your first time. That was…really amazing."

I laughed, "Oh no, it was just the drink you gave me! What was it by the way?"

"It's called a Flash tonic," he smirked, "It can give a nonuser the ability to breathe fire…only _if_ they're strong enough to do it, and you Miss Flower did it…on your _first_ try. It took _Mario_ at least thirteen tries and several dry throats later before he could."

I gasped, "R-really!"

He nodded his head, looking slightly dazed, "I was a bit unsure if you would be able to do it, but damn you showed me hotsuff. You blew a flame _and _held it for four seconds…"

"Oh gosh, I just thought you drank it and poof! You can blow a flame. Well I won't lie, that was pretty awesome. I see why you love blowing fire so much!"

He still didn't seem like he was listening, "Stars that was _sexy_…"

I blushed; I'm pretty sure I did not hear that correctly, "W-what?"

He blinked, suddenly snapping back to clear consciousness, "Uh, let's go and find Junior before he breaks something that I don't wanna buy."

Still pink-faced I laughed, "Yeah…sure."

He placed an arm around my shoulder and we walked off. What is happening here? He's putting his hand on my shoulder and it's not even bothering me anymore. Here I am, forced to be a delegate to a Koopa who was threatening to destroy my kingdom but this certainly didn't feel like I was being held against my will.

In fact it almost felt liberating, like I was free to be myself. The standard of what a woman could be was different among the Koopa. I could be powerful, strong, silly, and no one would question if I was feminine or if I was a proper ruler.

Within my own kingdom I would have to pretend to be someone who I wasn't; a well-mannered, dainty, powerless princess. But here the Koopa found my strength refreshing, and admirable even. It was here I had the strength to blow fire and roar as loudly and mightily as I wished.

I could be myself.

* * *

><p>We found Junior, well actually he found us and was hopping around, wanting us to play the infamous Hi-striker Ring the bell game. You know, the game where you slam the hammer and try to get the puck to the top? Anyways, Junior grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the towering game. I was surprised Junior wanted a teddy bear Koopa prize.<p>

"_Come one! Come all and test your might!"_ The gamemaster called out.

As Junior pulled me towards the game, the gamemaster must have caught sight of us, "_Hey! Hey Pretty lady want to try out your strength and win yourself something nice? Step riiiiiiiight up! Step right up!"_

I approached the towering Hi-Striker and glared. It was several feet taller than King Bowser and glowed prettily in a garish sort of way. The Hi-striker glowed in a myriad of rainbow color and chirruped loudly in pitchy tunes. I looked at the gamemaster and nodded my head, "Let's do this."

The gamemaster grinned, handing the sledgehammer over and the moment I had to hold it by myself, I nearly dropped it to the floor, "Oh! Heavy! Heavy!"

Bowser's deep guffaws rang out. I waddled over to the Hi-striker, dragging the mallet through the grass painstakingly. Stars, I'm more than sure this mallet weighs more than I do!

Bowser sat back with his arms crossed, utterly amused. The gamemaster chuckled, watching as I pathetically dragged the hammer. I know I looked foolish but I promised I would win Junior that stuffed toy. So after a mental countdown, I reeled the hammer backwards, trying to steady it behind my head.

Just as I started tipping to the side and threatening to fall over, Bowser reached out to steady the weight of the hammer. He bolstered the weight completely. Our eyes met and just as I caught sight of a growing grin upon his face, I looked away blushing, "T-Thanks."

Once I was sure I regained my balance, I adjusted my grip on the hammer and coiled my fingers tightly upon the handle. I nodded to Bowser and with a wink, he let go. The moment I felt the weight of the hammer in my hands, I set my mouth and narrowed my eyes in concentration. With the added gravity, I slammed the mallet down with all the force I had.

"_Hiyah!"_

The puck rose passed the first two markers, passed the red and orange color spectrum but began to descend before it got near the yellow region of the Hi Striker. Disappointingly the puck went nowhere even near the top.

"Damn..." I hissed under my breath.

Junior pouted cutely as I growled. Note to self, this game was probably designed to be challenging to _Koopa_ strength and not human. So maybe it's really impressive by human standards to have even gotten to the first two marks.

The game master grinned at me, "_It looks like there's not enough power in those petite arms of yours. Sorry my lady, nice go at it though_!"

Bowser guffawed as I blushed angrily. I shoved the hammer into his hands and demanded he win the toy. The Koopa King grinned at me, eyes narrowing, "Yeah? And what will you _give_ me if I do?"

Smirking, I narrowed my eyes, "One right in the kisser."

He smiled, eyebrows raising, "Really?!"

"A fist in the kisser you turtle."

He shook his head and laughed. He nudged me out of the way playfully and smirked, "Well then, stand back and be sure not to _swoon_ over my highly masculine strength."

"Oh please," I rolled my eyes smiling, as Junior came to stand next to me.

"_King Bowser, would you like a try?"_ The gamemaster grinned.

"Hell yeah, now hand me that mallet. I'ma bust this thing wide open."

"_Oh, oh!_ _Ladies and gentlemen, first the lovely lady and now the glorious King Bowser has stepped into the fray! Things are about to get very interesting!"_

I blinked, stunned when I heard a crowd cheer. A small group of Koopa gathered around the moment they saw their king being handed a mallet. Smiles and whispered passed through the crowd as their eyes set upon their king. Throughout this entire carnival, I was impressed with how much awe and respect Bowser inspired from his people.

"_King Bowser! King Bowser! King Bowser!"_

Holding the huge mallet with one hand, he narrowed his eyes in concentration and slammed the hammer against the board. The puck soared almost too fast for my eyes to catch as it flew past the markers. Bowser took a step back, placed a confident hand on his hip and smirked as he watched the puck soar higher and higher.

The crowd cheered, the tempo of their claps growing quicker and quicker the closer the puck went towards the top. The moment the puck hit the bell, there was a victorious ring and the game broke out in a myriad of flashing colors and cheerful music.

"_King Bowser_! _THE WINNER_!" the gamemaster grinned, the crowd roaring loudly as they congratulated their king, "_But this isn't a surprise since it is the king of all Koopas_."

Junior jumped around happily, "King Dad is the strongest EVER!"

"That's right pint-size," he ruffled Bowser Jr.'s ponytail, "Now which one did you want?"

"Gimme that teddy bear Koopa!"

I smiled at Bowser Junior and placed my hands on my hips, "Now, why don't you try asking nicely BJ?"

His cheeks flushed a bit as he smiled sheepishly, "O-okay Mama Daisy. May I have the teddy bear Koopa please?"

I nodded my head in approval and gave him a thumbs-up. The King Koopa looked at the gamemaster and smirked, "You heard your prince, hook it up."

"Righto sire, enjoy and stop by anytime!"

The doll was placed in Junior's eager hands and the little Koopa happily chirruped, dancing around Bowser and singing his praises. As Junior continued to hop around his father in a circle, I bust out laughing at the heroic pose Bowser suddenly struck.

"The three-legged _race will begin in ten minutes, will all participants for the family three-legged race please report to the starting line now."_

"It's gonna start soon! Come on! We have to hurry!" Junior bleated, tugging on his dad's arm.

Junior led us to a three-legged race—tugging me there by hand-where both he and Bowser were preparing to compete. As Junior was warming up, doing over the top stretches and exercises, Bowser waited with his arms crossed. I clapped from the sidelines cheering them on.

The announcer spoke to the contestants over the mike, "_Since the theme IS family battle, not only do father and child have to race, but the husband has to also carry his wife to the finish line! First one there wins!"_

I suddenly froze; Oh no, I'm gonna be outta here before I can even be dragged into this race. Now, I'll just turn slowly, as to not bring attention to myself and get the hell out of here. I'll just hide behind that Koopa lady with the obnoxiously bright hat and then make a fast break for it and—"Going somewhere _wife_?"

Crap!

I turned around with deliberate slowness and Bowser stood over me, hands on his hips and eyes narrowed as Junior happily laughed at, well me I'm sure. The second Bowser started stomping over, I knew I was going to have to be a part of this race. Just as I tried to make a break for it, I squeaked when massive arms wrapped around my middle.

"No…no! Nooooo!" I cried out as I felt myself being thrown over his shoulder.

Bowser—I know he's smirking now, I just know it—walked towards the starting line. Junior tied his leg to his father's and gave him the thumbs up. Bowser smiled and returned the thumbs up.

"Remember what I taught you?"

"If you can't beat em'? Then cheat em?'" Junior asked in a question.

"The other one."

"Popping a cherry actually means—"

My head snapped up as Bowser suddenly slapped a hand over Junior's mouth. The king laughed nervously, "The _other _saying son."

"If you can beat em' then beat 'em so bad until they quit?"

"Atta boy," Bowser roughly noogied Junior, "Let's own these chumps."

"Owning chumps...NOW!" Junior cried out.

I groaned from my position over his shoulder. Yep, I'm pretty sure this counts as undignified.

"_Racers ready?!"_

I felt a rumble travel through Bowser's form as he spoke, "We better get you in a more comfortable position, wife."

I grunted as Bowser flipped me from his shoulders and into his arms. He was holding me in, ah what is it called? Bridal style or something? Gosh I feel stupid like this. I glared up at him as he winked back at me.

"Three…two…one…GO!"

Yet again the small crowd's cheers were loud and I could feel Bowser and Junior hobbling off towards the finish line. I laughed at how determined they both were. This was a three-legged race that they were treating like the Mushroom world cup! I stifled a laugh into my hand as I watched these two concentrate on something so silly!

As they passed by other competitors, Bowser shoved people out his way mercilessly as Junior tripped his foes. This was ridiculous! They were tagteaming and punching out people over a three-legged race!

Well, it was really no surprise that they won, since every other Koopa family either tripped or started fighting amongst each other. Bowser set me down so he and Junior could celebrate properly with a victory dance. I was quite…shocked when both of the Koopas started to _breakdance!_

Oh really, now I have seen it _all_.

My mouth dropped at their phenomenal dance skills. I was almost embarrassed when the crowd rallied around and started to clap, making a beat for the two to boogie down to. I tried to opt away from them, but Bowser was quicker and pulled me in. I screamed as he spun me around in circles laughing gleefully in the evil way of his.

Next Junior pulled us over to an artist Koopa troopa who was drawing caricatures of people. From where I was standing, they looked pretty good. Junior watched the doodles being made for awhile, listening avidly to the artist giving him pointers.

"King Dad! King Dad!" Junior danced around his dad.

"What is it you little twerp?"

"Can we get a picture drawn of us pleeeeeease?"

"Hmm," Bowser scratched his chin in thought, "I suppose we can. It'd be nice to get a picture of the family."

We posed for the picture, each of us doing something different. Junior was holding up two victory signs, I was winking, sticking out my tongue putting rabbit ears over Junior and Bowser was smirking evilly, flexing like a bodybuilder.

After waiting for eight minutes, our picture was painted and fleshed out, "A treat for the royal family," the artist smiled.

Junior instantly snatched it away and eyed it happily, "Wow! This picture is really cool! King Dad looks tough as usual! And Mama Daisy you look so pretty."

I looked at the picture and all but laughed at the cartoon. Even though it was a caricature, everyone still looked just like themselves. Granted Bowser was far more imposing and 'ripped' in the drawing. And I looked at myself and was almost blown away at how gorgeous my little caricature drawing was. The girl, even though she was making a silly face was extremely pretty.

"Is that me?" I gasped out.

Junior glanced at me as if I was mental but Bowser simply shook his head with a smile, "Like I said, your self-perception is completely off, Flower."

I blushed at the backhanded compliment and continued to study the picture. Before long, Junior took my hand, "Come on Mama Daisy! I want some cotton candy. Can we go? Please?"

"I say we can but—" Just when I looked up to confirm with Bowser, I realized that he wasn't there anymore, "Huh, well where's your dad?"

"He went to buy some spicy nachos, like he does every year. After he's done he'll find us, now come on Mama!"

I laughed, following the lead of the stubborn, cute little Koopa boy. Junior looked back at me and beamed, showing off his small fangs. We made it to the stand and Junior ordered a flavor called, 'leaping lemon,' and I got 'shocking strawberry.' I paid the stand owner who grinned at me.

"You have a darling boy, milady."

"Oh, uh thanks. He takes after his…father," I tried not to laugh as I savored the yummy cotton candy.

"What a gorgeous little family you are with his kingship," the Koopa lady cooed, happily watching Junior chomping away on his treat.

The Koopa woman smiled. Her face shifted from sweet to downright mischievous. She leaned closer to whisper, probably so Junior couldn't hear, "So woman to woman, how's he like?"

"Hmm? Him who?" I asked, popping more candy into my mouth.

"King Bowser," she grinned wickedly, "How is it like having _him_ in your bed? I bet its _wild_!"

I spluttered, coughing up my candy. Red-faced I slowly turned to glance at the Koopa lady, "I b-beg your pardon?" I squeaked out.

I glanced over, making sure Junior wasn't in range to hear such talk. I released a breath of relief as he was obliviously and happily licking away at his cotton candy.

"You lucky human!" she sighed dreamily, "Oh I can only _imagine_ the candy you get every night. Why he's so muscular and strong! I just wonder how can you _possibly_ keep your hands off of him in public?"

I only stared at her in horror as my face slowly grew more and more red. When would this woman stop talking about this?! She thought that Bowser and I were—whoa, just _whoa_. I may be playing Junior's temporary mother for the day, but my new role as mommy certainly does not extend into also being Bowser's wife.

She smiled, "But I can see why the king chose a human girl like you. If you can blow fire with Flash tonic, then you must be a tough little cookie. Pretty yet tough, I bet the king has his hands full with you…_literally._"

"H-hey!" I gasped, blushing even hotter, "T-The king doesn't have his hands 'full' w-with anything!"

"I won't have my hands full with what now?"

I gasped and spun to face low and behold, Bowser. He approached with an amused visage. Blushing, I about-faced promptly as the Koopa woman seemed delighted with his appearance.

"My king," she inclined her head respectfully, "May I get you any candy? Or have you come to safeguard your pretty little firecracker?"

"No I'm fine," he huffed but then grinned as he slipped an easy arm over my shoulders, "Although I _am _curious as to why my blushing bride is so red. What did I miss?"

"Nothing!" I shouted, glaring at his crooked smile.

"Oh nothing but girl talk," she winked at me, "Take care of your adorable little boy."

We walked off and the second the woman was out of sight, Bowser grinned at me, "So what was that about?"

"Yeah like I'll _ever_ tell you!"

* * *

><p>It was sunset, the sky bleeding oranges and reds as the family day carnival finished up. After begging, Bowser let Junior tag along with us for the weekend. As we rode away in the clown car, Junior promised to show me all his favorite hideaways, toys, and even his club house.<p>

"Normally we don't let girls in buuuut," he grinned at me, "I'll make an exception for you Mama Daisy."

Halfway through the flight Junior was out cold, snoring softly on my lap. I guess all that excitement and running around had tuckered the cute little prince out. As he snoozed, I ran a hand through his soft red mane.

I guess my mind had been blank the entire ride because I barely noticed when we touched down back at the Bowser Keep. The clown car was landed and Bowser wrapped both Junior and I in his arms and carried us out of the flying vehicle.

When I realized he had no plans on even letting me walk through the halls, I frowned, "My legs are fine you know!"

The corners of his lips rose, "Oh _yeah_ they are."

I punched him in the arm and his grin only grew. Gosh, I can't even hurt this guy! At least Luigi flinched when I punched him in the arm. Even Mario jokingly said my punches felt like lightning and thunder but I suppose the king of Koopas was just leagues stronger.

The moment Bowser stepped into the castle, Kamek and Kammy materialized before us in a myriad of colorful shapes. They both inclined their heads and Kamek spoke, "Welcome back your majesty and your ladyship."

"And what a surprise, it seems the youngest prince has come home for the evening," Kammy's stoic face lightened up a bit at the sight of junior. I suppose Junior's charm even melted the ice off of Kammy's apathetic heart.

Bowser grinned at his advisers as they hovered nearer, "And how was family day? I hope you won the three-legged race again."

"Three year champs and still holding onto the title," Bowser chuckled, "And I had one helluva time today. What say you Flower?"

"I had fun! I blew fire! Had awesome cotton candy and I met the cutest little Koopa ever," I smiled down at Junior. He was deep asleep in my arms by now, curled up into a ball. He was so cute!

"Well am I to safely assume you are going to see Princess Daisy returned to her bedchambers?" Kammy asked.

"Of course. Think you guys can take over the palace for a few more minutes?" Bowser grinned.

"Of course your lordship," Kamek nodded his head and turned to look at me. His smile softened, "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself, princess and dream well."

"You too Kamek, and goodnight. Night Kammy."

I smiled warmly back at the elderly magiKoopa; he was such a big-hearted guy. He was genuine, good-natured and very likeable; how did he end up working under one of the meanest Koopas? In fact, why would Bowser keep around someone so warm-hearted? Maybe this only proves that there's more to Bowser than I know.

"Goodnight princess," Kammy inclined her head.

And just before Bowser started towards the elevator, I noticed something peculiar. It happened so fast I almost missed it; Kamek and Kammy shared a quick-mischievous look with each other before they headed off in the opposite direction. Hmm, I wonder what that was all about…

Just as Bowser entered the elevator, I squirmed in his grasp. He looked down at me and arched an eyebrow, "What's up with you? You're wiggling more than a wiggler? Not afraid I'm gonna drop you, are ya?"

"Of course not!" I laughed, "If you can haul around that mallet today, then you better not drop me mister. Anyways you can let me walk."

"Nope. I'm carrying you to bed and that's that," he huffed, "Take it or leave it."

"Leave it."

"Well that's just too bad then Flower. Tonight you're being chauffeured around by the king of all studs."

We exited the elevator and moments later I knew we were going to be at my place soon. We arrived at my door and with a kick, the large doors swung open with ease. I frowned, thinking of how damn hard I have to just push those doors to get them to open. And yet Bowser can love-tap the door and it rolls open.

He carried me to the bed and placed me down gently on my aqua-blue comforter. He glanced around the room and smiled, "So what do you think of your new accommodations? Pretty snazzy eh?"

"The room is now decorated in my favorite colors and it's very pretty!" I laughed, "Hmm, now I wonder how a certain _somebody_ knew my favorite colors. Must be a sweet certain somebody."

"Sweet?" he recoiled in disgust, "Yuck, _definitely_ not sweet."

I chuckled, "Oh? That's too bad, 'cause I was going to say that said someone was not only sweet, but handsome, studly and the epitome of masculinity."

I grinned impishly at the way his eyes suddenly glimmered, "…Sweet's okay then."

I laughed, shaking my head as I continued to hold the snoozing Koopaling. In his sleep Junior mumbled something incoherently and rolled over, burying his head into my chest for cushion. Bowser narrowed a single eye at his son and blew a small ring of smoke.

I looked up at him, "What's wrong with you? All those spicy nachos finally moving through your system?"

The Koopa king laughed, "No not yet at least. Give me back my brat so I can put the little weasel to bed in his own room."

I shrugged, "I don't mind if you let him sleep in here with me. He's already out, just let him sleep. He looks tired."

"Okay, like _what the hell_!" he growled, a fog of smoke coiling from his nostrils, "How come that little nematode gets more actio—er-_affection_ than I do?!"

I blinked up at him in stupor, "What are you talking about Bowwy!?"

"One, don't ever call me that again thank you very much and two, you've hugged him at least five times today, three, you hold his hands whenever he wants, and four you're letting him _stay_ here with you! _In your bed_!?"

I gaped at Bowser disbelievingly, "Bowser, Junior's a _child_!" I furrowed my brows, "A cute, innocent little child!"

Bowser crossed his arms and glared away, "Yeah whatever. Still my point stands."

I stared at his pouty profile in confusion. Head turned, face screwed up in a frown and smoke rising from his nose; I'm sure the King Koopa was throwing a major tantrum. Like seriously what is he complaining about? What, does he want me to be mean to his son?!

Junior's a sweet, cute little Koopa who deserves to be spoiled a bit. What is all this 'Junior gets attention' bit that he's carrying on about? Call me crazy but is he jealous of how I've been babying Junior!?

Surely he doesn't want to be babied...

Oh my Stars he DOES!

This is too rich!

I chuckled, then spoke in a babyish voice, "Aw does little Kingie Bowwie-wowie wanna be wuved by Mama Daisy?"

He narrowed his eyes to the point I couldn't tell they were open, "And what would make you—" his eyes widened as if he just processed all that I said, "…Why yes I do."

I rolled my eyes, still amused, "Well then come here and I'll give you a goodnight hug."

I busted out into laughter at how fast Bowser had crawled his way onto the bed and towards me. I choked in laughter at his overeager grin. He rested an arm beside my head and grinned, "So…about the hug 'Mama Daisy'? Are you sure you don't want me to tuck you in? You're the one already in bed here."

"I have to change into pjs first," I grinned up at his beaming face.

Wait above me? I blinked, taking in our positions. I was sealed under the king Koopa in a potentially compromising position. At the thought of our precarious position I blushed heavily. I placed a palm to his plastron and tried to shove him, " King B-Bowser would you get off of me!? We're...Uh...On a bed...And this...Well...It looks bad...And..."

His joyous expression melded into a mischievous one, "Nope, not until I receive my promised hug."

"If you don't move I will kill you!"

"No dice Flower," he grinned larger at my reddening face, "In fact I'm starting to _enjoy_ myself here."

"I swear you big, obnoxious turtle…if you don't get off me this moment I'll—"

"Ooh and look at that. You're so inviting, asking the King of Koopas to join you in bed. I knew I could bring the devil out of you."

"—will shove this pipe so far up your—"

"You know, it's not often that a Koopa finds himself in such a situation…A delightful situation. Hmm, decisions, decisions…"

Fed up with his absolute lack of modesty, I spluttered out an indignant, "King Bowser t-this is indecent!"

The smile on Bowser's face turned downright licentious as his eyes sharpened. His next words were a purr, "Didn't I tell you _not_ to call me 'King' anymore? Perhaps you're a bit hard of hearing milady."

"But K-King—" I gasped, face flushing hotter as he brought his face closer to mine, and pressed his form lightly against mine.

My mind was racing a mile a minute and my heart was pounding against my torso hurriedly. My eyes darted around, mind in overdrive as I tried to think of a way out of this. And yet all I could only think of was how close we were and how hot I was starting to become.

"So then princess," he purred, still smiling, "What are you going to call me?"

My head was foggy, thoughts scattered in all directions. I could barely focus on his words as I could only think of how his pungent scent filled my nostrils or how warm he was. I gulped, "B-Bowser."

The edges of his lips pulled back into a content grin, "Very good."

Once he moved back a bit, I huffed, completely flustered by his lack of modesty, " I'm a princess and it's improper for a lady of my…status to…be…doing _this_!"

Bowser swapped his expression for a misleading innocent face, "'Doing?' Why we're not doing anything yet princess."

"Unless…" he stroked a gentle claw through my hair and leaned closer to my face. He lowered his eyelids to give off a smoldering look, "you _want_ to continue our game of _husband and wife_ from the carnival?"

I gasped, cheeks impossibly hot, "_B-Bowser!_ You jerk!—you remove yourself this instant or I swear I'll take a bat and—!"

He threw his head back and laughed rancorously, "Oh Flower! You should see the look on your face! It's priceless."

He stood up but made sure to scoop Junior into his arms. He smirked, eyes glowing victoriously. Red-faced and mortified I sat up, glaring at him through my bangs. With an arch smile he held out his arms for a hug. I hissed in anger and quickly latched my arms around him. Yet again the familiar soft rumbling traveled through his chest and into mine.

After a few seconds I pulled away from him. His soft expression left me floored, "Well then I guess this is goodnight, my little fire-breathing flower."

"Goodnight Mr. Flame master."

He chortled and flexed his arm that wasn't holding his snoozing son. I rolled my eyes and with one last wink tossed my direction, he stomped out of the room, softly closing the doors. With a sigh, I shook my head; what an adventure today was.

I was taken to a fair, met and fell in love with Bowser's adorable son, blew a stream of fire, and had a fun day in the sun. There had not been a single talk about our new alliance and surprisingly, I was okay with that.

* * *

><p>Alice: Thanks for reading! And leave a review please! :)<p> 


	6. The Ninji

Alice: OMG! On the first day I posted the last chapter I woke up and there were 3 reviews! You reviewers are amazing! I started working on the chapter the second I read the reviews because I was so inspired! ^_^ Thank you! Thank yoooou!

Ultrra: (smirks) So why don't you tell us how you really feel.

Alice: (snap fingers) That reminds me. This chapter tests the T rating for sure.

Ultrra:(Excited) Ooh! What do we have going on this chapter?

Alice: Well I don't want to ruin the surprise, but to stay realistic when Bowser gets mad, as the supreme demon king I don't see him saying 'Oh gosh darn it.' He's not going to use clean language when he's heated. Honestly nor would I see Daisy if she's super angry lol.

Ultrra: Okay…I can see that…Is that all for the rating?

Alice: (Serious face) Well…There's one scene I had to write and I swear it gave me the creeps making some of the guys say the stuff they said. But they're not nice guys so, I had to use some words...Sorry :/

Ultrra: If it makes you feel better, I've probably heard worse language in a highschool hallway.

Alice:...Well you do have a good point there. Ugh but I hate using bad words, like really bad…so creepy…but I had to make the story sound realistic, so it had to be done…(sighs) Sorry. Hopefully it's not too bad for you guys.

Ultrra: It'll be fine. Chillax Alice.

Alice: (sighs) Okay, I will. Oh yeah! If any of you guys have played any of the Mario Sports mix game, the newest ones, then the guy in 'red' is the ninja guy. So I don't want anyone thinking he's an OC XD Just read and then he comes up you'll be like 'Ooooh I know what Alice is talking about now XD' Anyways, please enjoy the chapter that came faster because of the great reviews! ^_^

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>It's Saturday and as the first rays of light leaked through gossamer curtains, I groaned. The alarm clock glowed with neon numbers; it was turning seven and that meant I slept in. As a foreign delegate I should have been up by <em>five, <em>showing some kind of interest in bettering the Sarasaland-Darkland alliance.

Ugh.

I sat up, rubbing sleep from my eyes; seven am still felt too early. Silver doors suddenly shot open and in sprang a speedy green blur of energy. Just as I finished a yawn, the miniature newcomer catapulted himself onto my lap with a practiced ease.

I blinked stupidly, trying to figure out what happened, "Wha?"

Startled, I peered at the young prince's smiling face, "Morning Mama Daisy!"

I laughed, gently tussling Junior's mane of hair, "Hey there! Good morning to you too BJ!"

Even at an unholy seven am Junior was still the epitome of darling; he wore bright, fluffy pajamas and slippers. As he sat on my lap chattering away about any and everything, his tail thumped against my leg. "Hey, do you like my new pajamas? They're cool aren't they?"

"Yes I like them a lot BJ," I chuckled.

"They kinda look like yours Mama! 'Cept yours are light blue and mine are green."

"That's true."

"Green's my favorite color! What's yours?"

"I like light blue."

"Really? Blue's kinda close to green, except green's waaay better."

I was laughing, enchanted by his infectious bubbling energy, "Is it now?"

"Yep! And Look, I brought you these!"

A tiny fist full of gaudy, bright flowers were stuck in front of my face. Smiling, I made a show of cooing over their beauty and even sniffing the large, pretty flowers.

"Why thank you Junior," I grinned, "They're beautiful! If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were trying to charm a lady."

"Aw heck, it's no problem Mama," the prince grinned bashfully, rubbing at the back of his neck; a trait he learned from his dad, "I kinda…got them from Wendy's flower garden, so hopefully she won't notice or she'll kill me. Besides King Dad taught me to be nice to girls."

"Well, then it'll have to be our secret then," I winked at him, "And your dad gives good advice."

"Oh yeah!" Junior snapped his fingers, "I just remembered, Miss Kammy was gonna wake you up for breakfast but I wanted to do it."

I grinned; so that explained the unorthodox wake-up call. Not like I'm complaining or anything, I actually like being woken up by a cute, smiling Koopa prince. Definitely better than an annoying alarm clock.

"Why don't you let me freshen up and we can go to breakfast?" As I rose out of bed, I picked him up and set him onto his feet, "I don't think it would be proper for your dad to see me dressed in pajamas. We adults have weird rules, don't we?"

Junior screwed up his face adorably, "Super weird! I'm wearing jammies too! Aw Mama Daisy, King Dad wouldn't care what you wear. I bet he'd like you even if you showed up naked!"

This brought out a full-fledged laugh on my part; ah the innocence of children. I patted his head, smirking down at him, "Well okay then, we're going to have a jammie day. Just let me brush my hair and then we can go, deal?"

Junior nodded his head excitedly, "Deal!"

After half an hour of grooming, I joined Junior. I laughed as the ever hyper child took my hand, dragging me down the hallways. On our way to the dining hall, Kammy was coming to retrieve me.

And once she realized Junior probably broke hundreds of rules in diplomatic etiquette, she gasped in a rather amusing fashion of horror. So while Junior led the way to breakfast, Kammy followed behind, apologizing profusely for her prince's 'rude' behavior.

Junior took very good care of me. I hid my laughter at his too cute antics. He marched up to the chefs boldly—with his chest puffed up and hands on his hips—and demanded they prepare the 'coolest' most 'totally awesomest' breakfast they could for his mama.

The chefs hid their smiles at their prince's serious face and promised they would make the best breakfast. So along with Kammy, Junior and I had a 'slammin' breakfast of pancakes stacked tall enough to tower overhead, French toast dripping with globs of maple syrup and butter, and all the chocolate milk and orange juice we could ask for.

"And then King Dad said, "FIRE!" And then BANG!" Junior threw his hands wide to simulate the explosion, "The cannon ball launched so far! And there was so much fire!"

"Really?" I grinned, putting another forkful of pancake into my mouth.

Kammy, who didn't like sweets, helped herself to several cups of fragrant Koopa coffee for breakfast. Junior's cuteness had the ability to weaken even the stolid adviser's stern heart. As she listened to his wild tales, she smiled warmly.

The jingle of her Koopa berry curve went off and she quickly looked through the schedule, "Princess, his Lordship would like to invite you to a game of tennis."

"Well sure," I grinned, "As long as Junior can play."

"But of course your ladyship. His lordliness will be present on his private court in thirty minutes. Perhaps we should wrap things up here…?"

"Sure," I looked at Junior and smiled, "You want to be on the same team?"

Junior blinked before he grinned, "You betcha I do! We can play together and it's gonna be swell! But what colors are you gonna wear?"

"Hmm? What do you mean?"

"Mama," Junior smirked, "If we're on the same team then we gotta wear the same colors!"

"Oh! Okay," I laughed, "Um, I was thinking about wearing gold. Your sister bought a nice sport dress I can run well in. You wanna wear gold?"

"Okay," Junior nodded his head, "Gold it is!"

Junior ran off to change as Kammy oversaw my outfit selection. With the help of Twiddle Brown and Twiddle Green we found the black and gold dress. I admired my image in the towering full-length vanity. This dress was_hot_! It was sleek and made me look like a secret agent. I struck a pose, arching an eyebrow suavely, "Super Agent Daisy reporting for duty..."

_I wonder how amazing his personal tennis courts are..._

Knowing Bowser, everything he owned was state of the art and ridiculously overdone. I was not disappointed. The courts were the top of the line, endowed with the best, latest sports equipment, sound systems and polished with a beautiful custom paint job. Stars, these courts even had a jumbo titron screen; just who in the world did Bowser play against here?!

I promised Junior we would team up against his dad who didn't want or need a partner. Apparently in Bowser's book as the 'glorious and studly king' he wouldn't need any help defeating 'a squirt and a woman'.

Heh, let's take his ego down yeah?

Junior stepped onto the tennis courts moments later. He wore a golden and black shell with matching wrist bands. He preened, chest puffed out as he pranced around, showing off.

"So Mama, how do I look?" he asked as he ran a hand through his mane.

I grinned, "You look sharp!"

"And you're lookin' hot too mama. _Haaaaawt!_" he winked, "We can both be super hot together!"

I laughed, "Hey I've got an idea."

Junior appeared interested, "Yeah what is it?"

As Junior waddled closer, I bent down to be eye level and whispered, "Everytime we score on your dad, we have to rub it into his face!"

Bowser Junior grinned in such a devious manner it was undeniably Bowser's influence. His small fangs glistened as he chuckled with delight, "I'm listening…"

"I don't know what to do…But it has to be something that'll make him really mad," I hummed thoughtfully.

Junior chuckled, "King Dad's _such_ a sore loser. It would be super funny if we did something to make him mad…"

"I know!" I laughed, playfully tickling Junior, "That's why we have to rub it into his face!"

"Hmm," Junior tapped his chin in thought, "Maybe a secret handshake? A victory dance?"

"Oh! That'll be awesome," I grinned, imagining the look on Bowser's face when we 'rub it in', "A super secret handshake it is! So how should we do it?"

Junior rubbed his chin thoughtfully and quirked a rather devious eyebrow, "Well I've got an idea…"

So after letting Junior decide our secret handshake, we made our way to Bowser's _personal _tennis court. Which was even nicer than the surrounding courts. Everything in these courts were red and black, stamped with the logo of a Bowser face.

At last we arrived and things were busy. Rock music blared over the speakers, spectators and sellsKoopa alike roamed the stands. Bowser waited courtside, surrounded by a team of Koopas, each waving some kind of object in hand.

"Would you like some water your lordship?"

"How about a nice hot towel to start the game off?"

"How about a nice cool towel to start the game off?"

"Would you like some Cocoa Coins?"

"How about some Koopa coconut cake?"

"A massage your nastiness?"

"Pedicure for the royal feet?"

The head honcho kicked back in a huge badass spiked chair, glaring into the distance; as the servants danced around, he ignored them with an admirable dedication. Our approach finally made Bowser look up and grin. He rose to his feet—servants wisely scattering—and stomped over, "Well then. Are the two of you ready to get your asses handed to you?"

"Ha! You wish King Dad!" Junior pointed at his father dramatically.

"Yeah right!" I laughed, "We'll change your tune by the end of the game!"

He harrumphed, "Junior, be less of a dweeb and get the game balls."

Junior saluted, "Aye, aye Captain!"

Junior scampered off to carry out his father's wishes. Bowser grinned, intentionally moving closer to me. I peered at him, curiously arching eyebrow; do personal boundaries not exist with this guy?

A clawed hand crept around my middle and pulled me closer. In response I arched an eyebrow even higher; um, what does he think he's doing? Does he know he's _this _close to being elbowed!?

"And just where are you going hotstuff?" A rumbling growl flooded his voice.

"…Huh?" I glared at his intrusive arm on my hip, "What in the world? If you don't move your claws in two point five seconds, I'm going to—"

"Look at this get up. You tryin' to catch a man or somethin'? I demand you stop trying to hide this sexy side," he grinned.

I blushed and retaliated by shoving him playfully in the chest. He didn't budge an inch, "H-Hey! I can look good if I want to..."

He made an obvious show of carefully eyeing my figure from head to toe, "Well you do, that's for sure. I almost broke my neck doing a double-take."

I punched his beefy bicep, "Yeah whatever Bowwy. Maybe you'll be distracted during the game by my super-secret agent outfit."

"With the way you're swinging those cute lil' hips I just might be," He grinned larger at my glowing face.

I walked away, pretending not to notice his lingering stare._ Stars doesn't he know it's rude to stare like that!? You'd think he's never seen a girl before!_

"Just like I thought," I heard a grin in Bowser's voice, "The view back here ain't all that bad either. What a pert, cute lil' round thing."

I gasped loudly, cheeks blazing as Bowser's obnoxious laughter echoed around the courtyard; t-this scaly bastard openly admitted to checking out my ass! He was still laughing as I glared at him. My voice was two octaves higher than usual, "Y-You're such an idiot! I-I'm going to kick your ass!"

I growled, stomping angrily as the king's guffaws burned my ears. Luckily Junior seemed too busy trying to balance the tennis ball on the thinnest side of his racket handle. I looked over at Bowser who was still smirking smugly. He even had the audacity to wave; that scaly…jackass, he totally knew I was still reeling.

"Ready to go Junior?"

"Yes! Yes! Yes!"

"Then let's kick some Koopa king tail!" I roared, throwing a fist into the air with Junior.

"Yeah you two wish," Bowser snorted from the other end of the court.

Junior handed me the ball and went to play the net. I threw the ball high above my head for a gorgeous serve, and the moment I slammed my racket into the ball, the game began. You know for an eight foot tall Koopa, Bowser could move around pretty fast.

When he popped into his shell, he glided across the court! Corner and pocket shots I counted on were saved. I let Junior play up since he really wanted to, but also strategically he was the more powerful player. He may have been a young Koopa but already his shots had twice the strength of mine.

And we really needed some 'pow' in the front to get those scores. The first time we scored on Bowser, Junior and I immediately launched into our secret handshake. Bowser watched, a hilarious expression stuck on his face; his left eye twitched as he half glared and half gaped.

After a few more rounds, I stopped keeping score and decided to play for the heck of it. Bowser swore he was leading but I'm pretty sure we were tied. After three sets, the three of us were sweating and out of breath. By game's end Junior and I celebrated surviving the 'great and awful' Bowser.

The spectators cheered and thanked us for a 'well-played, exciting game.' I lifted Junior into the air and hugged him. Our faces were slicked with sweat and shone in the sun.

"We did it! We survived against the great, amazing, King Bowser!" I cheered.

Junior whooped, "Yeah! We did it!"

Laughing, I pressed a kiss to the top of his precious head.

A soft, rumbling purr came from Junior. I laughed, "You like mama's kisses do you?"

"You better believe I do Mama Daisy!" he chirruped, tail wagging.

"Well then you can have thousands of kissies!" I laughed, our silly giggles filling the air together.

I continued to slather Junior with kisses as he laughed giddily. I began to tickle his pudgy arms and just as I had him at tears, someone cleared their throat. Bowser appeared, glaring down at us. With arms crossed and an elevated eyebrow, he tapped his foot impatiently, "Well if you two are _done_ cupcaking then we can go and get something to eat."

"Dinner?" Junior hopped out of my arms, "Boy I'm starved! I could eat a whole cow!"

"And didn't I warn you about being overly affectionate with Junior?" Bowser huffed, as he walked by my side.

Amused, I looked up to better study his expression. A coil of dark smoke wafted from his nostril in a telltale sign of irritation and every now and then his left fist would twitch.

Stars this was funny; a father jealous of his own kid!

"You didn't say that," I smirked, "You just said to 'share the love'."

"Well?" he grinned, "Then I'm waiting for some looooooovin'."

"And yet you'll get none Bowwy," I smirked, enjoying the way his red eyes seemed to glow.

"Okay that's it, no more mister nice shell," he growled, looming closer, "I'm gonna make you love me."

Without warning, massive arms wrapped around my middle and launched me into the air. Bowser picked me up and spun me around. I squealed in both shock and excitement, laughing at his antics, "Bowser! Would you stop already?!"

"Nope! Not till you feel the love!" he cackled.

He wrapped me into a hug, pressing his sweat-slick face against mine. Cheek to cheek I could feel his large smile, "Now this isn't so bad is it?"

I laughed softly, "For being pressed into the face of a sweaty, smelly Koopa it isn't."

"Hey! I do _not_ stink."

"Maybe not but you're certainly not clean!"

"You just don't understand what a highly masculine aroma I am giving off now. If you were a Koopa female you would be swooning, puddled goo in my strong, manly arms."

As I laughed, his deep chuckle rumbled through his chest. His grip tightened around my middle as he growled, "Well, you always smell pretty."

I blushed as he took a deep inhalation of my hair. _W-What was that!?_ Before I could protest his invasive actions, he set me upon my feet and patted my shoulder, "Now shall we take a shower?"

Still flustered, "Sure let's go."

Bowser's grin grew more sinister as he arched an eyebrow, "Oh yeah? Well then _hell yeah._ Let's go hop in my private shower and _get naked_!"

I blushed and stumbled over my feet as Bowser roared with laughter, "I did _not_ mean that! I…I meant to go and—!"

"I know Flower," he grinned, "I was just messing with you," he ruffled my hair, "You're just too easy to play with. That lil' pink blush of yours."

I huffed, "Okay. You can now take your big hands off of me."

"You say that," Bowser wriggled his eyebrows, "but your eyes are telling me otherwise."

"My _eyes_ are telling you to remove them _now_ or face the consequences."

"Fair enough," he chuckled, "But this is the last time Junior gets action—er _affection_ from you and I don't."

I stared at him in wordless disbelief; was he serious about that?! I mean really. There are several dynamics at work; I can play around and spoil a cute kindergarten-aged Koopaling, versus dealing with one of the most powerful monarchs of _all time_.

I was here to promote a new alliance and had to impress him, whereas with Junior I could be as silly and as light-hearted as I wished to be. Sometimes I think Bowser might be a little mental if he can't see that.

Bowser rushed forward to grab the door. He held it open, winked and bowed. I rolled my eyes, smiling and stepped inside. I shot him one last look before I turned and headed to my room. I showered, enjoying the expensive shampoos and soaps before I toweled off and dressed in a blue shirt and capris.

I ran a brush through my damp hair, tiny red curls blossoming over my head. Satisfied with my reflection, I exited the guest bedroom. Junior and Bowser were on the other side. The king grinned, "Ah and there the lady is."

"King dad," Junior 'whispered' to his dad, "I thought you said girls take long to get ready. Mama was really fast."

Bowser grinned, knowing I could hear every word they said, "Heh well that's 'cause your Mama isn't like all the other little girlies around. She's...special. And hey your hair is... spirally again."

An eager claw shot forward and reached for my hair. I dogged his grab, only to have another meaty palm reach for my hair. I ducked his hand, and suddenly this transformed into a game: Bowser trying to touch my hair as I ducked and dodged.

He was grinning as I laughed, "Bowser! This is stupid! Stop already!"

"Just let me touch your hair," he laughed, "You're being such a pain!"

I laughed, "Oh I'm the pain!?"

Junior watched us, eyes shinning, "Can I play?"

"No," Bowser barked, still grinning evilly, "This is a mommy and daddy game."

What is a mommy and daddy game!? I realized Bowser was going to keep at this! I slowed down to finally end the madness. My deceleration was just enough for him to touch a curling lock of red hair. We both stopped the frenzied dance, panting.

"See? That wasn't so bad," he laughed, "Could have avoided all this trouble but you have to be difficult, eh Flower?"

I rolled my eyes, "Let's just get dinner already."

We hopped into the clown car and the second I sat down, Junior scrambled into my lap. I laughed at the way his small tail thumped against my leg. As Bowser steered the clown car, Junior leaned back and whispered into my ear, "Hey Mama Daisy, I want something really yummy!"

I realized we were keeping a secret from Bowser, so I did my best to look as nonchalant as possible, "Yeah, like what?"

"There's this store called Koopie's Sweeties," Junior licked his chops, "And they have all these yummy treats! Cakes, icecream, pies anything you want!"

"Okay so I'll tell Bowser to—"

"No!" he shook his head, "King Dad won't let me go there until I eat vegetables and yucky stuff like that."

"I don't see why you can't have one little treat. Besides you and I kicked butt today," I winked, "I guess I'll have to treat you to dessert myself today."

"Yay!" He cheered, "But uh…how are we gonna get away from King Dad? If he knows where we're headed then he won't let me go."

Bowser seemed focused on steering. He appeared clueless to our plotting. This reminded me of all the times Peachy and I had found ways to sneak out of the castle as teenagers; her father would have no clue that we had ever schemed. In fact, all of Peach's plans were so well thought of that it scares me…

She got away with her stunts because of her sweet, unsuspecting looks. With her gorgeous large blue eyes and perfectly pouty lips, everyone thought Peach was an angel on Earth. Believe me when I say Peach has a devious mind.

I chuckled, "Oh don't worry Junior, you leave that big pushover to me."

No more than ten minutes later we landed outside of a large, glitzy restaurant. It looked high profile with many wealthy clientele and now I wished I had an elegant dress. There was even paparazzi outside, snapping thousands of blinding photos.

Maybe it was a good thing Junior and I would be sneaking off. The clown copter parked in a personalized VIP for the king. Bowser hopped out of the clown car and waited as Junior pounced out seconds later.

Once Junior stood behind his father, he gave a wink; alrighty then. I took a deep breath: operation distract Bowser away! I fluffed my hair and placed my hands on my hips in a way that was supposed to be alluring.

Stars, please don't let me fail epically at this. I know I don't have a single sexy bone in my _body_ but let me be convincing…

Somehow…

Bowser courteously extended his hand._ Is it odd how he's so... chivalrous?_ I slipped into his arms carefully, heart pounding as adrenaline raced through my veins. I gently smoothed my fingers over the well-defined biceps in his arms. His muscles clenched, stiffening under my fingers.

"Hey," I whispered into his ear.

"Uh hey…?" He seemed unsure.

"I was wondering," I drew a circle on his arm, "If I could take Junior to a toy shop before we eat dinner."

Bowser snorted, "That little brat can wait—"

Something Peach told me about guys came to mind. Men liked subtle sensations, a feather-soft touch here or a light caress there. I leaned into him, pressing my form against his cool plastron. I must have done something right, or terribly wrong by the way his muscles clenched.

"We'll only be gone for a moment _Bowser_," I purred, giving a hooded stare.

"W-Well…I…I don't see why you couldn't go…for a _second_…"

He placed me onto my feet and something really funny happened. His face was flushed red. Haha what? I, the biggest tomboy in Sarasaland, have managed to fluster the great King Bowser!? I felt smug.

Bowser was one of the most powerful—if not the most influential—kings to have existed. He'd have to be used to thousands of women throwing themselves at him. Thousands of gorgeous knock-outs were probably beating down his doors and yet I could make him blush!?

Haha, score one for Daisy!

"We'll be back in ten minutes okay?"

"Okay..." He looked dazed.

I took Junior's hand and gave Bowser one last wink before sauntering off. When Junior was sure we were out of hearing range, he grinned, "We did it Mama! We did it!"

"Yeah we did!" I held my hand out, "Up high!"

With a heart felt cheer, Junior jumped and completed the high-five. He hollered and cheered as he raced down the street. I laughed softly, following behind. I don't think we'll be away from Bowser for too long…

Speaking of Bowser; he seemed quite flustered! Serves him right for all those things he's said to me.

_So Bowser isn't the only one who can make someone blush..._

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><p>"Thank you Mama Daisy for taking me to the Sweet Shoppe!" Junior chirruped as he licked a lollypop twice as large as his head.<p>

"No problem Junior," I smiled, sipping a banana crème daiquiri.

What! Oh don't give me those looks, it's nonalcoholic. I really have no plans on getting drunk off of any type of Koopa alcohol, aka gasoline. I held Junior's free hand and had to bend over to compensate for his small size.

Junior looked up and grinned, "You don't think King Dad will be mad we ditched him, right?"

I laughed, "We'll be back in a matter of seconds. Besides I won't let your dad get mad at you."

We both shared a wink and laughed, "Still we should probably put pedal to the metal and hurry up. I don't want your dad _too_ angry."

Junior made a thoughtful look before he spoke, "If we gotta be back fast, then follow me Mama Daisy. We can take a quick shortcut my friends and I usually take home."

Something in my peripheral vision flickered. I looked over my shoulder and saw nothing but a glowing streetlamp and a stone shop. _Weird, could have swore I saw something..._

"Mama?"

"Oh right, I'm coming Junior."

Junior took a sharp turn, leading to an old, abandoned building. I glanced around at the damaged ceiling, creaking floorboards and crumbling plaster; was it safe here? I looked at Junior, "You're sure it's safe here? This place looks like it could collapse in a second."

"My friends and I used to play hide and seek all the time here," Junior chirped.

As we padded through the various rooms, I coughed, inhaling thick coats of dust. This was pretty gnarly if I had to say. Not only was it dangerous and dark but this place was a health hazard.

"Geesh Junior, I hope you don't play in here too often," I coughed, "This could be really bad for your sinuses."

"Sine-what?"

We turned another corner and Junior looked back at me, "Look Mama Daisy we're almost there, all we have to do is jump outside and—"

A blur flickered in the corner of my vision, a subtle movement of a shadow. An ominous chill traveled down my spine and I couldn't explain the terrible feeling. I glanced at my shadow; it _flickered_.

There was no light but my shadow _moved. _Dread flooded into my body; what was going on!? I looked at Junior and his shadow flickered like mine, only the once Koopa-shaped silhouette morphed into a tall, humanoid figure.

I lunged forward, reaching for Junior, "Junior! W-Wait!"

A dark blur exploded into motion. The movement was unseen as something flew into Junior. The Koopaling cried out, hit with enough brute strength that he flew into a wall. His weight was enough to crack a couple of moldering boards.

"…Ouchies."

"JUNIOR!"

I dashed for him, only to have several men materialize from thin air. They rushed forward, roughly grabbing my clothes, hair, anything they could. Stars, what was going on?! I roared, kicking and struggling against my captors.

"For shit's sake, stop struggling Red. It's pointless and annoying."

My ire blazed as I struggled harder, growling and fighting against the strange hands. A well-aimed kick to the back of my leg made me fold like a deck of cards. Soft laughter fluttered.

"For a spoiled princess," I was roughly prodded in the back, "she's kinda strong. Now up."

I was jerked to my feet brusquely. My heart jumped to my throat; Junior had yet to move. Worry flooded through me; was he okay? "Junior! Speak to me!"

"That little _lizard_ is fine princess, let him be."

I gasped, astounded at their cruelty. _Lizard_ was an offensive epithet regarding the Koopa. It carried the connotation that as humans, we were more superior. It was always that way wasn't it? The people who used such offensive terms were usually far more deserving of the foul words than their victims.

I ground my teeth as I shook with fury, "You…animals…you let me go now or Stars help you—"

My head was jerked back painfully, stars exploding before my eyes. Then I was thrown forward, "Shut up. You are in no position to make demands."

Another man laughed, "I think she's threatening us!"

Someone spoke in my ear, "Do you know what we do to pushy, mouthy girls like you? Huh Red?"

"The sensei has arrived. At attention!"

The only part of them I could see were loose black cloaks. The hands bruising my arms were covered in thick black gloves. I blinked as a new form pressed his way forward. He marched passed Junior, gliding with a sense of arrogance.

Unlike the other men, he was dressed completely in red, a deep blood hue. He wore a large warrior headdress and had a mask that covered the lower portion of his face. With a few quick hand movements, he disappeared in a swirling flurry of leaves.

Stunned, I looked around for the red warrior. He reappeared closer. The swirling leaves settled down, slowly dropping to the floor gracefully as he rose to his feet; Holy Stars…were these men the Ninji?! The renowned creed of bandits and cut throats who pledge loyalty to any master for a fee?

Their combat and cruelty were legendary. The red ninja stopped in front of me and crossed his arms. He was tall, six feet even with a lean figure and defined muscles.

The lower rank ninja bowed before he spoke.

"Princess Daisy of Sarasaland?" he asked his men in a cool tenor.

"Yes sensei!" They all responded crisply.

The assassin turned his gaze to me, "I was instructed to find the princess of Sarasaland..." the owner of the smooth voice lifted my face to his.

Calloused, warm fingers held my chin as he studied my face. It was too dark to distinguish any of his facial features but his icy blue eyes shone against the recesses of darkness. They were so light they almost appeared silver under the moon's touch.

Maybe if circumstances were different, I would have thought he had really pretty eyes; they shone like glass and he had such long lashes. Those beautiful eyes narrowed just a touch before he spoke again, "Hmm. What a shame. She's quite lovely."

I gathered a wad of spit and launched it at him with all the force in my body. The other Ninji jumped, startled but the assassin in red didn't react as spittle splattered his cheek. Those cold, icy eyes glinted like diamonds as I snarled at him in furious Sarasalandian.

"_Ladayk nyeh sa selah_!" I spat out furiously.

The red clothed assassin wiped the spittle from his face and licked his finger. He grinned, a ruthless, unfeeling smile that didn't warm up his glacial gaze.

"Little whore!" A subordinate Ninji yanked my hair, forcing my face to the floor, "We'll teach you some damn respect! Stupid, desert whore!"

"That's not necessary," the Red Ninji spoke, "Stand down. I shall handle this."

I was pulled onto my feet. The Red Ninji grabbed my face, snapping my head to him. He crouched until we were nearly face level. For a moment there was silence; I glared as he wordlessly took me in.

His next words were ushered so softly I almost missed them, "So my mother gave birth to a bastard child did she? Is that what you just said in your native tongue?"

He ran a finger down my cheek, etching his nail into my face painfully, "I've heard tales of the wild daughter of the great Emperor Sakuro. How…intriguing."

His hand moved in a blur, ripping my shirt and immodestly exposing my bra. I blushed, snarling as the other Ninji leered. Some of them even laughed condescendingly. And it's not as if I could cover myself up, the Ninji were holding me. Their stares and lewd comments made my skin crawl.

"Well what do we have here?" he spoke softly. He dragged a finger down my collar bone and towards my exposed cleavage. My throat grew parched as gooseflesh raked my skin; he was _touching _me and there was nothing I could do. I hitched a shaking breath as his finger stopped perilously above my breast.

His intruding finger felt alien, burning against my skin painfully like flame. Our eyes met; mine wide with fear and his darkly victorious; we both knew I didn't want him touching me.

I blushed girlishly as he smirked. His men roared with sinful amusement, "Aww what's wrong? The little virgin didn't like that?"

"No one ever popped that sweet cherry, eh Red?"

"Hell, give her to me and I'll make a woman out of her."

I trembled from a vituperate blend of rising fear and bitter hatred. I glared balefully at the Red Ninji, my teeth bared as he spoke gingerly, "Hmm? Why do you flush so princess? Perhaps you are..._unfamiliar_ to an intimate male touch "

When he removed his hand from my person, I released a breath. Even now my tremors didn't fade. I glowered as he continued to stare, "Insult me princess…and I shall insult you."

There was movement as Junior's head popped up. He looked dazed, slowly rising to his feet. _Stars, please don't let them see him, let him run away and find Bowser._

"Mama…" he whispered.

"Junior," I cried, "Run! Get away from here!"

A gash on his forehead was bleeding badly. He'd need to get snitches. Junior took in the scene before he growled, "Hey you jerks stop it! Stop it now!"

The red assassin looked over his shoulder, "Hmm, I was positive the Koopa child was unconscious."

"Bowser Junior," he twitched at the use of his full name, "Get out of here and run!"

"I...I'm not leaving you Mama!" he cried out, "I promised Daddy I'd protect you!"

One of the Ninji spoke to his buddy, "Wanna know how we can _really_ make this fun? Do you think that kid even knows what sex is?"

I felt my stomach drop at the sound of their continued chatter, "Maybe we can teach him with Cherry here."

"You lecherous bastards," I growled, trembling in a mixture of fear and anger.

"Hey lizard kid!" one of them yelled to Junior, "Wanna touch the first tits of your life? Come here so we can give you your first sex ed lesson!"

The Ninji roared with laughter as Junior looked confused. As the rest of his men laughed, the red assassin narrowed his eyes but said nothing to deter his men.

"No stop…" I growled, completely revolted, "You leave him out of this, he's only a child you _selohs_."

It's one thing to screw around with me but Junior was still innocent. He was a Koopaling who was learning his ABC's, learning how to read and learning how to share and not touch things without asking. Maybe these Ninji should go to kindergarten with Junior.

Junior's face grew darker, "Let her go! You jerks leave my mama alone! Y-You're all going to be sorry when my daddy comes!"

"Mother did he say," the red assassin rubbed his chin with a calculating look, "Things have certainly become more _interesting_. The princess has a…relationship to the Koopa king."

" 'Mama? '" One of the subordinate ninjas snorted, "Then that means Cherry here is King Koopa's lil whore."

"For a dirty lizard king," yet again my face was held so my features could be studied better, "he has pretty good tastes in prostitutes."

"Shit, well your mom's certainly a hot little piece of ass here, Lizard Junior."

I froze when a hand slipped from my shoulders and onto my back. I spat viciously, temper flaring, "You keep your disgusting hands to _yourself!"_

"Hey lizard kid, are you watching this?" This time a cold leather-clad hand slowly slithered onto my exposed chest and squeezed to the point it was painful. I gasped, clenching my eyes shut, trying to stomach the degradation.

"No…stop…not in front of…Junior," I growled weakly, trembling in both fear and anger, "Please..."

"_This_, is how you pleasure a woman kiddo. When you're rough when them, they really like it."

The Ninji laughed as if the funniest thing just happened. Junior looked confused, studying my contorted facial expressions.

"P-Pleasure?" Junior asked unsurely, "Y-You're hurting mama though…and she's not happy. No one should touch Mama but Daddy!"

I was being treated like nothing more than a cheap call girl. My eyes watered; the toll of being humiliated, helpless and angry was taking a toil. I turned my head, snarling as I fought traitorous tears, I wasn't going to cry.

I was not going to give these _selahs_ the joy of seeing me cry. But no matter how hard I tried, tears dribbled down my chin. I looked at Junior, "M-Mama Daisy..."

I gave a weak smile. Junior looked as if he were about to cry himself. In the midst of these dangerous warriors, I could only think about Junior's safety and I mouthed a single word to him, '_Run.'_

Junior, face still screwed up like he was going to cry at the drop of a hat, shook his head no. Then fixed his gaze on my captors and something was suddenly ignited within him. His compassion transformed into rage as his little form shook with fury as smoke began to waft from both his mouth and nose.

He growled, claws curling into fists as he shouted, "You're hurting her! You're hurting my mama! I said _leave my mama alone!"_

He released a child-like roar, lacking the ferocity to send these guys running. The men laughed, "Why don't you try that again you bite-sized lizard?"

Junior, eyes wet with unshed tears, made a show of reeling back, inhaling as much oxygen as he could. This time when Junior roared, the building's foundation rattled, dust rising into the air like fog. Everyone fell silent, even the composed red ninja seemed taken back.

While the underlings were murmuring, still stunned at Junior's glorious roar, I heard the Red Ninji speak softly, "So he's finally here…"

I glared at him; who was here?

"Shit…" a Ninji hissed, sounding unhinged, "Not bad you little liza—_Ugh_!"

A large orange fist broke through one of the walls and knocked the said ninja into the opposite wall. In response to the new threat, the Red Ninji picked me up and moved to the opposite side of the room.

As the rest of the Ninji stood on guard, weapons drawn and waiting in defensive stances, a gigantic form ripped through the wall like nothing, roaring furiously. The red assassin handed me off to his closest henchman and stepped forward. I peered around his lean form and stomping towards us was…

"_Bowser_!" I cried out happily, "Oh thank the Stars…"

Bowser swung a furious punch into one of the closest—and most unfortunate—Ninji. The fool flew into a wall and impacted with a sick crack. I'm not sure if that guy is alive. When he tried to move, Bowser walked onto him, ignoring the man's gurgling cries of pain.

The king Koopa glared around the room, smoke rising from his nose. In the silver moonlight his eyes glowed completely white. Despite looking monstrous he was a hero, here to save his family. He spotted Junior and the sight of his bloodied son made the king's rage blaze dangerously.

"K-King Dad, I knew you'd save us," Junior smiled weakly.

As Junior limped over towards his father, his knees gave out. But before the prince could collapse Bowser caught him fluidly with one arm. The Koopa King released a savage, blood-curdling roar.

The king's growing fury was scary, even the Ninji began to tremble. _Oh? So they have no problem triple-teaming a tiny girl but the moment someone bigger and stronger comes along, they tremble like sissies._Everyone looked frightened for their lives save for the Red Ninji, who remained perfectly calm. Maybe even intrigued.

"You bastards are in for the worst ass-kicking of your lives!" he roared, flames spouting from his mouth in an explosion.

"We have come to deliver a message today, King Koopa," the red assassin spoke ever tranquilly even in the face of Bowser's fury.

"I don't give _two shits_ about a damn message!" he snarled, brandishing a large fist as the back of his mouth glowed red.

"Very well, then I shall expedite this: Your throne will not remain yours much longer," the red assassin spoke in his cool tone, "Master says soon anything and any_one _you hold dear…"

The red assassin stepped closer. I snapped away but his hands were faster, grabbing my face.

"L-Let go of me!" I hissed.

I tried to pull away as the red assassin stroked my chin with his thumb, "…will belong to _him_ shortly."

Bowser snarled ferociously, releasing a second roar that shook the foundation. His mouth glowed red-hot, eyes blazing wildly, "You keep your hands _off_ of _my _flower! _She's mine_. _Mine_!"

"Your flower? How utterly intriguing," the Red Ninji spoke softly. He raised his hand and I was released. I staggered away from them, "Master will not forget and soon he shall claim your throne King Bowser."

I barely registered when a pair of robust arms scooped me up. My face touched the cool carapace of his and I felt just how hard his heart was hammering away. As tremors raced through my body, I wrapped my arms around him. Bowser tightened his hold in a comforting gesture.

I was safe within these bulky, muscular arms and even the natural smoky scent of his was solace. I hugged him tighter, muscles trembling with strain.

"Bowser…" I whispered, as I clutched him tighter.

"I'm here Flower," he growled into my ear, "Don't you worry that pretty little head anymore."

"Enjoy those touches while they last," at the sound of the Red Ninja's deep voice, both of our heads snapped up.

"No." Bowser growled, eyes ferocious and wild, "_You _should enjoy your last breaths while you can. I _will _kill your master. And then I'll sever your head from your neck."

"Master will take everything you hold dear. And ultimately he shall also claim your _soul_," the assassin's blue eyes froze over and the way his voice drained of its humanity gave me the chills.

Simultaneously the ninjas threw down smoke bombs, dark clouds coiling in the air and when the smoke cleared, they were gone without a trace. For a moment we were all silent; my head was still spinning and I felt as if everything was a dream.

One moment I'm playing around with Junior, laughing and smiling then the next second we were attacked, jumped by these lowlife mercenaries. They were after Bowser and weren't above taking a girl and a child hostage.

Before I could turn to Bowser, Junior wailed. He sobbed, face buried into my stomach. I took Junior into my arms, stroking his mane softly. The young Koopaling hugged my leg as I rubbed his back.

"Mama…I'm s-scared," he sobbed.

His fear unlocked a flood of tranquility into my being. I dropped to my knee, using a motherly, soothing voice,"Junior everything is all right now. Your dad and I are here."

Junior's tears calmed. I lifted him in my arms, patting comfortingly at his shell. Bowser looked at the two of us with a painful helplessness. He grappled with something I could barely see, "I never thought I'd have to use this," he spoke to himself softly, furrowed brows.

In his hand was a gleaming, red jeweled scepter. He spun the scepter in a circle and with a flick of his wrist, he spoke, "To the castle."

In a bright flash of light we disappeared.

* * *

><p>We materialized inside the throne room where the castle staff had been awaiting our arrival. Bowser must have alerted everyone of tonight's catastrophes. Maids and servants gasped at the sight of the bruise and dried blood on their prince's face.<p>

Maids and guards alike crowded around Junior, as some of the medical Koopas began to clean his bleeding forehead. Multiple servants and guards questioned him and Junior watched them all, appearing overwhelmed by all the attention.

Junior moved closer to my person.

"Who would do such a thing to the prince?"

"Monsters…"

"Why would someone attack a child?"

"The King has all right to kill whoever was foolish enough to harm the prince."

"Move aside," a hammer bro boomed, "the king's advisers must get through!"

Kamek and Kammy shoved their way through the crowd. Even though I was in Bowser's arms, the gathered crowd made me sorely aware I had a gaping tear in my shirt, stretching from sternum to stomach.

Blushing, I crossed my arms over my chest, hoping to salvage some sort of decency. At the sight of their king's broiling fury Kamek and Kammy were beside us in seconds. Behind them was a line of armored Koopa troopas.

"My Stars," Kammy breathed, lightly touching the side of Junior's face, "Who could have done such a thing to a sweet little Koopa?"

"M-Miss K-Kammy?" Junior sniffled, eyes glassy as he looked up at her, "I'm..I…"

I was surprised when Kammy set aside her prestigious ego and cupped Junior into a firm hug. She whispered softly into the prince's ears as she rubbed his back gently. While Kammy consoled Junior, Kamek had approached me.

"Hey, are you okay Princess Daisy?" Kamek spoke to me softly.

I forced a smile upon my face, "I'm doing okay Kamek. It's Junior I'm worried about."

"If you need anything at all Princess, do not hesitate to ask," Kamek placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

"Thank you."

I sniffled and pulled him into a hug. Something about his placid demeanor made me feel safe. As he held me, the old magiKoopa spoke softly,"It's okay princess. You're safe now. We know you're strong but you can be vulnerable around us. Let it all go."

Over my shoulder, Bowser narrowed his eyes at Kamek.

"There, there milady," he cooed softly, "Everything's alright now. Kamek's here for you, sweetheart. I was so worried about you when Lord Bowser informed us. "

He worried about me?

"I'll have a hot cup of cocoa sent to your room with lots of whipped topping, alright? I'll tell the twins to prepare a nice hot bath for you in the Jacuzzi. And I'll send the prince as well so you two can relax together and play a few games. This event has been terribly trying on you both."

I laughed lightly, "Okay, sounds good, Kamek. And thank yo—!"

A huge hand tugged at the back of my shirt. I squealed, falling into Bowser's plastron. As my cheek stuck against the cool shell, I could feel the rumbles in Bowser's chest. Bowser glared menacingly at his subordinate. Kamek seemed confused his king's aggressive display.

"Your lordship is everything all right?" Kamek asked as he hovered by his ward.

"Care to fondle the princess anymore!?" He snarled.

"I b-beg your pardon?" Kamek gaped disbelievingly, "What is the matter sire!? I'm simply consoling the princess!"

"The hell do you think?!" he snarled, carmine eyes narrowing, "Junior's covered in his own blood and just _look _at Daisy."

"Kamek was simply concerned your greatness," Kammy raised her wand and its gem glowed blue.

That was a signal to the staff as they all scattered in different directions. The guards saluted before they marched to their posts and the maids approached Junior.

Bowser was deep in thought, glaring off into the distance with blazing orange eyes. Maids cooed at Junior soothingly as they took him by the hand and promised to kiss his boo-boos better, "Come with us Prince Bowser and we shall take care of you."

Junior resisted, "I don't wanna leave my Mama Daisy! I wanna stay with my Mama!"

"But prince, surely you know Lady Daisy is tired as well. Now please just—"

"No," Junior even stomped his foot, "I wanna stay with Mama!"

I smiled and bent down to speak with Junior, "BJ I'll be with you to get cleaned up, okay? Then later we can play a few games together and—"

"No," Bowser deadpanned, eyes stern, "you go with the maids Junior, I need to talk with Daisy."

_Daisy_? What happened to my nickname? No Flower? I frowned; Bowser was really taking this to heart if he, the biggest prankster on this planet, was serious. Or perhaps his demeanor was so cold because he had the many eyes of his staff. Maybe this was the ruthless King Bowser I had heard of.

Maybe like me he had to pretend to be someone else in the face of his subjects. I had to act frail and pretty but this cruel Bowser made me feel unsettled.

"King Dad I want mama! I…_I'm scared_!" Junior wailed, grabbing onto my leg crying.

I bent over and used the scraps of my top to wipe his eyes. Junior sniffled, blinking up at me as I spoke soothingly, "Hey now Junior. You don't need to be scared. I'm going to be here with you. Okay?"

Bowser narrowed his eyes, blowing out a ring of smoke, "_Bowser Junior_ act like a damn Koopa. Suck up those tears and don't be such a damn baby!"

"_Mama_!" he wailed, gripping my leg tighter.

"Bowser…" I beseeched softly, "He's frightened. Let me go with him then I'll come back and—"

With a thunderous snarl Bowser ripped Junior from my leg and pushed him away. Betrayal and hurt shone in Junior's eyes painfully as his father pointed towards the maids and roared, "GO!"

The maids trembled at their king's wild ire. I was shocked, speechless at the show of such callous behavior. My heart broke when Junior ran off crying, embarrassed.

"Junior!"

I tried to reach out for him but he had already ran off. I noticed the other maids began to scatter too; probably to avoid their king's wrath. I spun around to face Bowser angrily, "How dare you speak to Junior that way! He's not even seven years old yet! The hell were you thinking!?"

"You come with me princess," he growled, looming ominously.

"No! Not until you find Junior and apologize," I placed my hands on my hips in my 'power' stance.

Bowser sneered, "You seem to think it's optional. You're coming with me even if I gotta drag you across this castle. Make a choice: follow like a lady or get dragged like luggage."

"I'm not going anywhere," I spat; his eyes slanted dangerously, "Not until you calm down, find Junior and—!"

He growled roughly, grabbing my wrist and did as he said; he dragged me effortlessly. I gasped, angered at the complete lack of respect, "Bowser!? Bowser! Stop! _Stop it!_ Let me go!"

"L-Lord Bowser!?" Kamek asked, stunned. Even Kammy stared on with disbelief, "Perhaps you should let the princess go. You could hurt her…"

Bowser ignored Kamek and I with a bullheaded determination. He marched, a terrifyingly furious glare on his face. I tried to dig my heels into the carpet but he continued to drag me as if I weighed nothing. I screamed, yelled and resisted him to the best of my ability but nothing worked.

"Is all that really necessary?" He snarled, cutting a dark look my direction.

"Then let me go you jerk!" I roared back.

His orange eyes flashed dangerously as his expression hardened. Something tells me I only served to tick him off further: his grip tightened painfully around my wrist and now smoke was pouring from his mouth.

"K-Kamek?" I looked over my shoulder in a plea of help.

The elder magiKoopa looked torn, trying to decide whether it was wise to disobey his raging king. Kamek peered at Kammy for help but she shrugged helplessly.

King Koopa was too strong for a tiny human girl like me. Face flushed in anger I followed him quietly, glaring at the back of his head.

"Lord Bowser," Kamek began softly, "You really ought to let Miss Daisy go and—"

"KAMMY!" he roared into the air, and out of thin air she materialized.

Bowser's wild rage left no room for slowness or inaction. She fixed her glasses upon her face anxiously, "Your grace?"

"Follow me. Kamek, watch Junior and make sure he stops blubbering. The thought of the crown prince crying like a little girl is only pissing me off further."

"Yes your grace," I heard Kamek call as he turned and headed in the opposite direction. He shot one last apologetic look my way then disappeared.

Bowser dragged me to a set of golden lacquered elevators and clicked the thirteenth floor. We traveled in dead silence, the tension between us as thick as cream. The door gave a _ping _as it opened and yet again I followed Bowser. I was led through an even more ominous, long hall decorated with large, menacing Koopa statues.

These weren't all statues of Bowser but they were different Koopas. Each of them looked meaner, bigger and more daunting than their predecessor. I slipped closer to the strong, hulking king for security. I tried to ignore the furious stone eyes, the malice and cruelty made them seem so life like.

At the end of the dark hall were a set of enormous red doors. They were colossal, spanning from the ceiling and ending at the floor; definitely the most ostentatious doors I have seen in the castle. This must be where the king Koopa rested. With one well-placed shot, Bowser kicked the doors in and dragged me into the room.

I was flooded by darkness and a chill of cold air. He tossed me in—where I stumbled and toppled gracelessly onto a soft, billowy surface. It had to be a bed. Bowser proceeded to lock the doors as silent and ominous as a wraith.

Bright, orange flames roared to life as Bowser's silhouette slipped away from the fireplace. He turned towards me. The light of the flames contrasted like yin and yang as shadows and darkness entwined his massive form in an ominous dance. As he stomped torwards the firelight, his horns glowed against the darkness of the room.

His eyes were completely black, hidden in the dark depths of night and yet I knew his face was contorted into a mask of pure hatred. Daunted at the approaching king, I slipped away. For one of the first times, I was afraid of Bowser.

Seconds later the electricity flared and blinding white stars shattered before my eyes painfully. I blinked dumbly as my vision slowly adjusted. I rolled over onto my back and met Bowser's hot glare. He loomed overhead with wild , furious eyes that nearly glowed.

We stared at each other, motionless for a blink in time. His eyes were blazing, orange like a scorching cast iron. I secured my hands over my chest, hiding the spot where my shirt had been immodestly shredded. His eyes flickered onto the hidden area and I couldn't help but blush under his scrutinizing stare.

Bowser was daunting. The Bowser I knew and cared for would have made an inappropriately flirtatious joke about being on his bed, or taken a crack at my shirt but all he did was glare blankly, as if compassion didn't run through his blood.

"Kamelia mend her shirt," he ordered in a gravelly, monotone voice.

Yet another lack of a nickname I noticed on Bowser's part. And if Kammy noticed this too, then she certainly didn't acknowledge it.

"Of course your grace however I must beg your pardon. Could you step out of the room momentarily? I will mend a young lady's shirt and it would be improper to have a gentleKoopa present. I will be done in a mom—"

"No, just do it here and now," he growled.

"…Of course." Kammy shot an apologetic look my way before she waved her wand and cast her spell, "Please move your arms for a moment my ladyship."

I unfurled my arms to allow her magic direct access to my torn clothing. Bowser stood, arms crossed and glaring as he waited for the magic to work. What the hell!? W-Was he trying to get a free peek!?

Female empathy must have ran through Kammy's bones. She positioned herself in front of me so her king didn't have a bird's eye view of my exposure. I lowered my head in embarrassment. He may have not been flat-out ogling, but he was still getting a pretty decent view of my cleavage.

It wasn't too soon when my top was finally sewed up. The conjured floating needle popped out of existence once finished with it's task. Reeling of both embarrassment and anger, I snapped, "What in the hell is so important you couldn't have left the room for three seconds?! I'm a girl and you're a guy! I-I have _things_ you shouldn't see!"

Bowser recoiled for a second before he hardened his features again, "What did those Ninji want?"

I blinked; wasn't he concerned about Junior and I? Those _freaks_ had busted Junior's nose and groped me like I was some sort of streetwalker. I was stunned; he couldn't have meant that. He's worried about our safety, right?

"Kamelia…you don't _think_ this has to do with…?" his glare intensified as he paused meaningfully.

Kammy's face became grim, "Sire I am most certain it has to deal with…_him_. We should put all the citizens on red alert and perhaps even enforce a curfew…"

"I can't believe this," Bowser shook his head, "That _asshole _sent someone after my son and the princess to get to me. What a total punk ass move!"

He shot a glare my direction, "See, this is what happens when you don't have me with you! You and Junior ran off like little idiots and had one helluva ride ditching dumbass King Bowser, didn't you?"

"That's not what we thought at all…" I frowned.

"And _you_," he growled, stomping over until he loomed above me.

I found myself backing up just from his intensity. Smoke wafted from his nostrils as his narrowed eyes glowed.

"The _way_ you tricked me…" he was inches away from my face, speaking in a rough whisper, "I should have known there was something to that overly friendly floozy act. What a fool I am; you bat your big pretty eyes and I drag after you like a pussy-whipped idiot. Well played princess."

Heat flooded my face as I averted my eyes. He chuckled mirthlessly, "Why so horrified? It's what you wanted, isn't it? Makes me wonder how many guys you've deceived with your miss innocent act."

"I-I've never done that before! I'm not that kind of girl!" I snapped, cheeks hot from mortification. But he wasn't through yet.

"Sure you haven't," Again he grinned with no real humor, "And then you have the _nerve_ to try and baby Junior even more than usual! As if he isn't a little soft-shell enough!"

I frowned, "Just because Junior has a good heart doesn't mean he's a pushover. Maybe you ought to quit being such a damn jerk and—"

I squeaked when Bowser slammed his fists into a dresser. Wood shattered, spraying into millions of pieces, "If that little pussy wanted to talk to me directly, then he should have gone for _me_!"

"Sire this is the way of tyrants," Kammy hissed, "Going after those who are close to your heart is cowardly, however this method gets the point across every well…"

That was the last straw. Bowser wasn't listening or worried about Junior and I at all! He was out for blood and was so aroused by the prospect of revenge that he was...abandoning us.

"Kammy!" I growled, "Would you make me a stool please! About three feet high!"

"Er…sure…" she said surprised by my command.

In the blink of an eye a green stool appeared. Bowser looked furious at the interruption and had smoke wafting from his nostrils.

"What the hell princess!" he snarled, "Can't you see we're trying to talk strategy!"

I quickly placed the stool next to Bowser's foot and I hopped on. This made us just about face level. I glared at him as he continued to spew, "Why the hell can't you act like a woman for a change and just sit there and be quiet! I—"

With all the strength I could muster I punched Bowser across the face. I'm sure I wasn't strong enough to deal any type of real damage to the powerful Koopa king. But I was damn certain it was hard enough to snap his head to the side and the moment I saw my fist connect with his jaw, he looked relatively surprised.

Shocked, Kammy's jaw dropped along with her scepter and Bowser turned to face me wide-eyed. He placed a claw to his face as he gawked incredulously. My hand hurt like hell after that little stunt but it was worth it.

"How _dare you_!" I trembled with anger; my whole body was shaking from my fury.

His shit-list was miles long: shoving Junior away coldly, seeing me indecent, not carrying about my welfare. It's time I gave him a piece of my mind here. This was no way to treat me.

"How heartless are you!" My voice cracked but I was too angry to care, "Bowser Junior and I were just assaulted by men who could have killed us with no trouble whatsoever! And you didn't even have the...the courtesy to ask how we are!"

I glared as my Sarasalandian accent filtered into my English; this only happened when I was really pissed off.

"_Macdelon! _I was already treated like a piece of meat earlier today, so I really don't need it from you either. I-I was afraid for my life today…I was afraid for Junior that they might have hurt him badly…I…those _selohs ha tanika de manos tangos, _had their awful hands everywhere on me…"

At the thought of how they touched me, I felt my eyes grow damp with hot tears. I wiped at my face angrily, not wanting to cry, "_And you didn't even ask if I was okay_! The time when I need you in my corner you're not there."

I hopped off the stool and before I left the room I flipped him off. I stomped through the great doorframe and marched off towards my room. I took the elevator to the second floor and trekked to the silver doors. I barely made it to my room when stress tore apart my strength.

I ripped my door open, locked it and fell to pieces. I sobbed, not bothering to undress as I went to bed. I yelled into my pillow and beat my fists against the pillow in frustration.

I don't remember when I went to sleep that night. I thought of everything that happened; the Ninji, Junior's face red with blood, the stray hands on me, and Bowser's unruly anger. It all made me feel weak and exhausted.

Exhaustion seeped into my bones and I gave into the seductive darkness.

* * *

><p>I woke up the next morning feeling terrible and achy. I slowly rose from the tangled, crinkly turbulence of turquoise sheets and headed for the shower. I was still dressed in my outfit from the day before and I didn't even have to look into my ridiculously large vanity to know that I looked awful. I placed a hand into my tangled hair and slowly pulled the tiny knots out.<p>

Even as I fixed my hair, I could still feel that I was shaking from everything that happened last night. Even in my sleep it was like everything was burned painfully into my memory. I could still see Junior's sweet face covered with blood, and I could still feel every single grope and every moment a Ninji's hands were upon me.

And the assassin in red, I could still picture his ice-blue eyes; perfectly cold and dead, as if emotions didn't pass through him. I stripped off my filthy, ripped clothes and went in the shower and the second the water hit my face, the urge to cry won out. As the shower scalded my flesh and turned my brown skin red, I trembled.

I shook with anger as I curled my nails into my palm. My nails bit into my flesh but I didn't care; I was frustrated that I couldn't have protected Junior and I was furious that I couldn't protect myself. The spunky gal of Sarasaland was just a wuss when it came down to it.

But I was still determined not to be defeated. I wiped at my eyes with one final resolution and sighed; okay, enough of this pity party; big girls don't cry over stupid boys. I shampooed my hair thoroughly and washed and rewashed, hoping to get the grime of the Ninji washed off me completely. Within fifteen minutes I dried off and wrapped a large fluffy towel around my slender frame and hair.

I stepped into my room and massaged the bridge of my nose with my thumb; hmm no wonder why father did this, it actually does make you feel better. Well enough with this mopping around crap. Gotta get out, get dressed and get on with my day. I'll find Junior and maybe we can have breakfast together and play a game together.

The last person I wish to see is Bowser. He was such a heartless prick yesterday and just thinking about him makes my blood boil. I stopped massaging my nose when I heard someone clear their throat. I halted and instantly looked up. There, in my room was Bowser.

_Bowser?_

We stared at each other and I'm pretty sure that my state of dress was responsible for how red his face was. He slowly grinned and I nearly fell over backwards, shrieking in shock as I ran into the bathroom.

I was wearing only a towel and that big turtle was sitting on my bed, putting a major dent into the bedframe. And the moment I step out before him in a towel, he's grinning like he's won the Mushroom lottery!

My voice came out far more shrill than I wanted, "_What are you doing in here_!"

"I came to talk to you," I could hear the smile in his voice. Why was he _smiling!_

"Well get out of here and go!" I clutched the towel tighter to my person, face still flame-red.

"I don't know Flower," I could just picture that smug grin on his face, "After what I just saw, I'm suddenly tempted to stay."

I gritted my teeth together in anger, as I tightly clenched my towel, "Bowser, Stars help me I will remove your organs from your body if you don't leave!"

"Sheesh, a guy comes to apologize and this is how he's treated," he whuffed indignantly.

"Apologize…?" I asked.

"Yeah," his response was even softer. I wished I could see the look on his face, I can't even imagine what it would even look like, "I…I was a jackass yesterday."

"Well that's putting it mildly," I snorted, crossing my arms, "You were a major jerkass. Hmm, Commander Jerkass more like it."

"H-hey! Do ya want the apology or not!"

I tried not to laugh, "Continue…"

"So as I was saying," he sighed, "You're right, about everything and about how awful I was yesterday. I c-couldn't sleep well knowing how you were mad at me and how I treated you…I'm sorry Flower."

He took a deep breath and continued, "But you know…I was so…scared that I couldn't protect you and Junior. I saw what those creeps had done to you and him and I was furious and you…"

Bowser's voice dropped to a whisper, "I thought, 'Oh my Stars what if those creeps had raped her?' I saw what they had done to your shirt…and I was livid. T-those bastards don't even deserve to kiss the dirt you walk on, let alone touch you the way they did."

I blushed as I listened to his words, "…Bowser…"

"I-if they had defiled you," I heard the growl enter his voice, "Then I don't think I could ever live with myself, Flower. Only you should decide what guy gets to be…lucky enough to put his hands on you. I…_aw shit_ I sound like a wuss don't I!"

I laughed, delighted at the emotion in his voice, "No! No, you sound sincere and like someone I want to have around me for a very long time."

I could hear the grin in his voice, "Yeah?"

I gave a small smile, "Yes…So have you apologized to Junior?"

"Yeah, I gave him that and a daddy talk too. I told him how much of a tool I was yesterday and that if he wanted to have been with you…I shouldn't have been mean to him." he chuckled.

"So where is Junior now?" I asked softly, "You can bring him in here."

Bowser must have grinned because I could hear it in his voice, "Actually kiddo's waiting outside."

"What for?"

"'Cause he doesn't want you to be mad at me anymore," Bowser chuckled, somehow I pictured him shaking his head, "he said he wanted the 'family dynamic' to be good again."

I laughed, "Stars he's such a cute kid."

"Yeah, well it's 'cuz he came from a cute dad." I heard Bowser shift his weight from foot to foot I imagine, "So…d-do you forgive me, Flower?"

A small smile blossomed upon my lips, "…Yes, I think I do."

"Great!"

Before I knew it, Bowser's head popped around the corner of my bathroom door frame and his grin was electric, "So now that we're friends again, we're gonna hug it out, yeah?"

"Like this!" I squeaked, gripping my towel tighter, "You need to get the hell outta here now please!"

Bowser's grin stretched even further as he encroached me ominously, "Oh I can _tell_ this is going to be the _best_ hug I'll get yet."

I gasped, face still flushed. He stomped towards me slowly, chuckling as I slapped a wet palm against his shell, "Bowser if you don't get your scaly _ass_ out of here…I'll hate you again."

The Koopa laughed as he slowly exited, "Fine, but I better see you outside in a hurry."

"Yes now out," I slammed the door, frowning at his rancorous laughter.

"See you in a bit, _long legs_." I blushed hotly as he stomped away; I bet that idiot was grinning stupidly the whole way out.

I smiled slightly; what a jerk. I walked out to choose clothes for the day and there upon my bed was a sparkling fire flower in a beautiful glass pot. Did Bowser buy me a pet fireflower? Oh my Stars! He bought me a friggin', adorable baby pet fireflower! I gasped, cooing happily as I ran over, "Oh why hello there cutie!"

I picked up the fireflower, which turned to look and blink up at me with its large eyes adorably. I smiled as the baby flower that instinctively leaned closer towards me as I stroked its leaves. The fireflower cooed happily and closed its eyes as I continued to softly pet its leaves.

I laughed, grinning, "What a needy little thing you are! Hmm, now what should I call you? Ooh, you have an odd number of leaves so that means you're a boy huh?"

I grinned even bigger as I swore the fireflower went a bit redder, "What to call you, what to name you… Now let's see. Hmm how about Sparky? No, Flamey? Shimmer? Glow? Oh…hmm how about Firefly?"

'Firefly' chirruped happily, waving his leaves around as his eyes squinted shut. I beamed, rubbing his warm head gently, "Alright, then Firefly your name is."

Firefly then poked me with one of his leaves and motioned towards something.

"Huh?"

His little leaf was pointed at a note beside my bed. I bent over and picked it up. Carefully I unfolded the notice and began to read.

_To the fire-breathing queen,_

_Sorry for being the biggest ASS in the WORLD yesterday! Yeah, yeah I know I was too hard on Junior and my concern for you just blinded me into a crazy rage. I just apologized to you and if you said yes—I hope you did—then this letter isn't all that unimportant. 'Cause I wrote this because I wasn't able to say all the things I wanted to say to you._

_I was really worried about you yesterday Flower, and my heart just hurt at the idea of you being furious with me. There's nothing that makes the King Koopa lose sleep than his Fire-breathing queen being miffed at him. You're tough, strong, resilient and most importantly super-hot, so I still want to be friends with you._

_Hopefully you can forgive my screw up and not be mad at me anymore. Since you can blow fire, I thought you'd like another fiery friend. Why don't you take care of the lil' guy for me?_

_-Bowwy_

I laughed at all the times the words in the letter had been crossed out—with the majority being—profanity—and I could tell that Bowser had written this letter raw and fresh off the press of his heart. Folding the letter gently, I looked over at Firefly and beamed.

"Well little guy," I smiled at him as I poked him in the stem playfully, "something tells me that we're going to become good friends!"

Firefly chirped happily, leaves fluttering around and I picked him up. I placed a quick kiss unto his forehead and laughed at how brightly he glowed. He was so warm, just like a miniature fireplace. I smiled as I thought of Bowser, it was because of him that I had this cute new pet.

He may have been rough around the edges…but I secretly think that Bowser's sweet underneath all those hard scales and spiked bands.

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><p>Alice: Yay! Another chappie done! Review please! And isn't Firefly so darn cute? ;D<p> 


	7. Crown: A Day of Desserts

Alice: Weee! Soooo many reviews! (eyes glow red) And they're miiiine. Alllll miiiiiine (cackles evilly) My pretties…

Ultrra: (moves away) You've really got issues. Just remember, the appointment I made for you to meet the shrink is still on next Monday.

Alice: (Rolls around in reviews) Hahahahaha!

Ultrra: (Gets on phone and dials number)…

Alice: (stops)…Oh! That reminds me! A couple of the reviewers brought up interesting points. 1) Daisy only see's Junior as a cute child and likes to dote on him because he's still precious and innocent ^_^ and 2) Yes! When the story gets to that point, we'll see what Bowser's other kids will think of Daisy's presence. Just because Wendy and Junior like her doesn't mean everyone else will!

Ultrra: (Talking on phone) Yeah, hey it's me! How's the family? Look…could we push that appointment up to…say tomorrow? Things have gotten way worse…_Way _worse.

Alice: I'm glad the extra language last chapter didn't frighten/anger you guys. In this chapter we will see a bit of the chapter from Bowser's perspective, not first person but third omniscient so we still know his thoughts! Xp

Ultrra: So…you mean you can bring people over with the straight jackets and everything? Really? That would be great! And please feel free to use weapons if you must!

Alice: (without any warning, rips phone from Ultrra's hand and throws it away) Please enjoy the chapter and leave mucho reviews! I'm already pretty far through the next chapter and might feel generous with tons of reviews! ^_^

Ultrra: Hey! That's my phone! You're sure as hell gonna get me a new one! :/

Alice: (gives a dry look) 'Bring straight jackets?' I mean really? U_U

Ultrra: (Surprised) Wow! Heh, I didn't even know you heard that. :O

Alice: _Please_, women are ridiculously good multi-taskers. I could probably hold three conversations, juggle, and scramble eggs if I desired.

Ultrra: Yeeeah…_Suuuure_. XP Anyways, enjoy the chapter folks! (waves) So…let's test out that multi-tasking thing now…

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>So you're probably wondering what we did next? After a tumultuous fight and a sweet make up? Bowser led both Junior and I to the clown car blind-folded because he wanted everything to be a secret.<p>

Kind of extreme right?

"Bowser this is stupid," I sighed, "We're going to find out anyways."

"Well," I gasped when he lifted me into the clown car, "That's just it with surprises. You'll find out when _I _want you to."

Junior was in nothing but giggles while I sighed deeply. This was over the top. In fact let it be known I was one of the few people who _hated _being surprised. It was well known amongst my friends and family you just don't surprise _me_.

Or people get hurt.

When I—Princess Daisy of Sarasaland—am surprised, I'm automatically hardwired to just attack. After Peach had a surprise party for my thirteenth birthday, two people ended up with broken noses and Luigi with a shiner and never again would anyone try to surprise me after that day.

Surprise parties all together are just creepy! Just imagine it, you think you're alone with one friend, talking about something you shouldn't be and then suddenly there are millions of people popping out of nowhere and yelling 'surprise!'

I can't do surprises, not without the urge to violently punch people. But Junior was enjoying this, so I wasn't going to let my surprise-paranoia phobia ruin all his fun. I was going to sit here, relax and hopefully keep from breaking out into a punching spree…

"We're like secret agents!" Junior had whispered to me.

"But don't agents know where they're going?" I asked.

"Not ones who are caught by the bad guys!" Junior cackled.

Great. So now we were the agents going in to be investigated. Everyone knows captured spies are _tortured._

It wasn't much later when the clown car fell into descent; there was no mistaking the stomach-dropping sensation. Bowser killed the propellers and removed our blindfolds. It was so bright, my vision burned in a painful white scald. Junior wailed, "Ah! I can't see! Can't see!"

I blinked rapidly as the bright glow of day began to settle. We stood in front of a familiar pink building with girlish white trimmings and a cute white picket fence. Bowser smirked, arms crossed as he gauged our reactions. We had been brought back to _Koopie's Sweeties._

Junior and I shared a silly grin.

"We're going to eat here?!" Junior bleated out happily, sounding more surprised than anything.

Bowser half-smirked, nodding his head, "Yeah. If you and the warrior princess felt like you had to come up with an elaborate scheme then this place _must_ be awesome."

"That's because it totally is awesome!" Junior started hopping around, "There's this lady, her name is Koopie and she makes all these yummy desserts! She makes everything King Dad! Ice cream, pies, cakes, shakes, cookies—"

Bowser laughed, holding his hands up defensively, "All right, all right! I get it; just don't get yourself into a sugar coma _before_ you eat."

I laughed, "A pre-sugar coma? Is there even such a thing?"

Junior rushed into the shop with a hoopla of cheer, plowing over customers to get to the front. I laughed at his enthusiasm as lumbering footsteps approached. I looked at the King, "So what's the real reason you brought us here?"

"What?" Bowser grinned impishly, even going as far as arching an eyebrow, "A handsome Koopa king can't spoil his son and a foreign dignitary?"

Still smiling, I laughed, "Oh please, you_ always_ have a motive whether you're kind enough to admit it or not."

"Well you guys left me out yesterday," he feigned looking hurt, "So I figured today we'd 'do it the right way' and have a fun day out together."

A heavy, clawed palm fell upon my shoulder, "Just look around Flower. The sky's clear, the air is fresh and today's weather is perfect. Let's just enjoy the peace and have some kickass dessert."

"Yeah, I think I can do with peace," I smiled, patting at his massive claw, "Well what are we waiting for? My banana daiquiri is waiting!"

Bowser huffed, "I hope this place is _amazing_. You and Junior make it sound like the best damn thing since steel."

I stepped into the shop and sighed; the sweet aroma of desserts hung in the air as thick as cream. A wonderful blend of baking pies, cakes and tarts made my mouth water.

Koopie was amazing, her store showcased her mastery of art and cooking. She had cakes and baked goods sculpted into detailed statues; Bowser studied a pie baked to replicate his keep. I waved to Koopie, a pretty, perky Koopa troopa with a curly red ponytail and bright chocolate eyes. She was the sole owner of the flourishing business and claimed to have known her customers names by heart. She was whipping up a creamy frosting while manning the front counter.

"Hello my lovelies!" she chirruped, "I didn't think I'd get to see the delightful Daisy and my handsome little prince again so soon!"

Junior was already at the front counter, chattering away excitedly to Koopie. Even from here I could see the animated way he was waving his arms and wagging his tail.

The prince beamed at Koopie, "Hiya! We're back for some more sugar."

She laughed, "Well if it isn't my favorite little prince! Now then you sit down and tell big sis what can I get for you and your pretty mama?"

Junior's tail tagged adorably in a blur of wiggles. My laugh drew the large king's attention, "What's up Flower?"

"Does your tail wag when you're happy? I think it's adorable." I grinned puckishly at him; I've already seen his tail wag but somehow this seemed like a question that would annoy him.

Bowser growled, even going as far as crossing his arms, "Absolutely _not_! I _am_ the badass king of the Darklands! I breathe fire, I can fold steel like origami, I can bench press gigantic boulders, but most importantly my _tail_does_ not_ wag like a _dog_."

I laughed, "Okay! Okay! Sorry! Sheesh, I didn't think you'd be so sensitive!"

"I'm not sensitive," he huffed again then suddenly smirked, "I have nerves of steel. I have utterly masculine hands that can crush stone and muscles that can—"

I rolled my eyes and looking to avoid another self-indulgent speech, I walked to the front counter. Koopie smiled, "Hello Princess Daisy. It's good to see you again. Oh by the way, who's your friend you brought along with you—?"

Her face paled as she recognized the king. Bowser grinned, shooting a wink at her.

"Holy hotcakes," she whispered, her voice rising into a squeak, "I-I-It's _K-K-King Bowser_! O-Oh my Stars—!"

"In the flesh," he grinned, "I'm here to spoil my little family rotten. Ya got anything good enough for a king to eat?"

After staring at him blankly—star struck I'm sure—she snapped her mouth shut and nodded her head vigorously, "O-Oh of course your lordliness!"

She looked at Junior and I, "I already know Junior would like the caramel and mint swirl pops with the cream-filled apples. Miss Daisy would you like the banana cream daiquiri again?"

"Yep!"

"I'll get started on it right away," She rolled up her sleeves, smiling, "Why not relax and take a seat."

The tabletops were decorated to look like the red and white wrappers of peppermint. I pulled up a chair and grinned at Junior. Seconds later Bowser sat by my side. I bit my lip; his chair creaked ominously under his massive weight. Now I understood why he liked his throne so much, it was the only chair in this entire kingdom that could support his weight!

Insert immature snicker here.

Koopie rushed into the kitchen, darting to and fro in a frantic panic. I can understand why she's so flustered. If Bowser was displeased it would mean a very abrupt end to her business. But her talent and work ethic was brilliant; I don't think she's losing her business anytime soon.

It took her seconds to complete our orders. Junior munched happily on his candy apples as I attacked the banana beverage. With a long draw from the straw, I sighed happily. Ah, yet again I was submerged in banana bliss; a beautiful world filled with tantalizingly sweet, creamy goodness.

"Oh _Stars_ this is good," I moaned.

I bet this banana daiquiri could end wars. Give two feuding war lords this drink and as long as a lifetime supply of banana daiquiri is written in their peace treaty, their wars _will _stop. As Koopie worked on Bowser's treat, the king was trying to sample my shake.

So pet peeve number one was surprises and my second top pet peeve was when people tried to eat your food. And by your food I mean my food.

"No!" I snapped childishly, "Drink your own daiquiri. This one is mine!"

"Oh come on," Bowser smirked, resting an elbow on the table, "Let me try some. The faces you make while you drink that thing…"

"Nope," I sighed happily, the banana bliss made my head swim pleasantly, "Besides you have your own great creation being made."

"If I can't have a sip then how about I try a little," his eyes narrowed as he smirked, "from those pink lips of yours?"

I blushed, so surprised I ended up choking. Bowser chuckled, eyes glowing with mirth. As I finished up my coughing fit, Koopie appeared from the back. Though she looked relatively flushed, with a messy ponytail and chocolate smeared on her cheek, she looked pleased.

"_Ta-da!_ For my favorite little prince I have an extra bag of goodies!" Koopie cooed happily, planting a kiss on Junior's head. She handed a bag of lollipops and candied apples to the Koopaling.

"And for you, your greatness I have created a masterpiece I hope you will find both exquisite and beautiful," Koopie beamed, cheeks blooming with color.

She rushed to the back, the frantic clanking of pots and pans filling the air. Seconds later Koopie walked out, balancing a gigantic ice cream sundae. She placed her masterful creation before Bowser and bowed.

"Enjoy Lord Bowser," she chirruped happily, clapping her hands together, "I hope it is to your extreme satisfaction!"

Bowser picked up two spoons and hungrily licked his lips. I smiled, realizing the colorful creation was made into an ice cream sculpture of Bowser's head. His red eyes were two maraschino cherries and his red mane was made of licorice pieces.

Lemon drops and orange tangies composed the fire the edible Bowser head breathed. Again I was impressed at Koopie's masterpiece. Both father and son dug into their treats with a savage zest. I looked at Bowser and laughed; my Stars the king had gone head first to devour his treat.

At the sound of my laughter his head snapped up. He looked so ridiculous I laughed again. His cheeks were puffy, bulging with dessert and a smear of ice cream decorated his snout. His face glowed red as I laughed harder but then a sly expression crossed his face.

He took a handful of ice cream and pressed it into my mouth. He laughed triumphantly as I spluttered. Hey this was delicious! And did I taste cake in there too? I wiped the dripping ice cream from my face and licked my fingers happily.

"Not too bad, eh Fire flower?" Bowser grinned.

I had plans to get him back. You just don't shove cake—delicious cake—in my face and get away with it!

"It's absolutely delicious! An ice cream cake! Yum!"

"Hey King Dad, can I have some?" Junior licked his lips as he stared hungrily at his father's dessert.

The malignant gleam returned to Bowser's eyes, "Sure squirt."

And again Bowser grabbed a handful of ice cream cake and with a mirthful roar, shoveled it straight into Junior's face. The little Koopa squawked, wiping hurriedly at his face as both Bowser and I laughed. While Bowser taunted his son, I scooped a handful of dripping ice cream cake and grinned terribly.

Payback Tiiiiiiiiiime!

What, did he think he could get us _both_ and just get away Scott- free!? Not on my watch buddy! Oh not on my watch! Just as Bowser threw his head back to completely enjoy laughing , I shoved the ice cream cake into his face. Bowser gaped; eyes wide and spluttering incoherently as Junior and I laughed.

Then the king's stupor morphed from surprise into seething anger. Bowser glared, completely furious. My laughter came to a screeching halt as I took in how _pissed_ he was. Oh Stars, I've screwed up big time… I, a foreign delegate, just slammed a handful of ice cream into the face of the most powerful ruler who ever_ existed._

I've done it now, oh Stars have I done it now; Bowser will probably order a mafia hit on me and Sarasaland is probably going to war against the kingdom with the strongest military influence for thousands of years...

Eyes still dangerously narrowed, Bowser seemed focused on my cake-covered hand; Oh Stars, he was going to cut off my fingers! I was never too attached to my fingers but I would still like their use! He looked up at me and smirked; _Oh Stars he was going to chop my fingers off_! Bowser pulled my arm forward.

I watched, morbid curiosity growing as he stretched my fingers out. _This is it; he's going to lop off my fingers one by one…_He gave one last devious grin before he started to...lick my fingers?

I blinked stupidly; he was _licking _my fingers!? He was licking the cake off my fingers? Why, that's just scandalous as sin! My face burned red-hot as Junior stuck his tongue out and bleated, "Aww King dad! Yuck! What if she had cooties? Now you have to have the cootie shot!"

"I don't have cooties!" Oddly enough, I was _really _offended Junior thought that. Maybe I just had to channel my embarrassment elsewhere?

"Mmm," the whole time he was grinning, "How _delicious_ and the icecream ain't that bad either."

I'm sure my face glowed even brighter, "Bowser! G-Get a grip will you!?"

"A grip huh? Your wish is my command," he purred, thick tongue wrapping around my smallest digit.

I gasped, cheeks impossibly hot, "_B-Bowser!? _J-Junior is watching!"

Koopie's perfume grew fragrant as she popped up beside us, "Is there anything I can—? _Oh my!_"

Horrified, my head snapped over to Koopie. She giggled into her palm as her cheeks glowed pink, "Oh, _oh_. Should I…take the young Prince Junior and…leave you two be?"

"No!"

"Yes!"

I glared as Bowser grinned devilishly. I yanked my hand away from him and frowned; ugh as badly as I wanted to take these gloves off, I knew it would be indecent to. I blushed as I heard Koopie walking away, tittering to herself.

"My, my, he really likes her," she giggled.

I shot a look at Bowser before looking around the shoppe. There was splattered, melting icecream cake and frosting on several tables and windows from our cake fight. I couldn't leave a mess like this. So I offered to help clean.

She looked horrified, "Princess Daisy! Please let me handle this. I will not allow a lady of your stature to clean!"

I smiled, "Sorry but I want to help you. Consider it paying you back for such a yummy dessert."

"But you paid already!"

"Nope, I've set my mind to it," I smiled at her, "Besides, I think cleaning is kind of relaxing."

Koopie blinked before smiling, "Thank you! I appreciate your help. Who's ever heard of a princess offering to clean? You're…so different Miss Daisy but it's a great thing. You're friendly, spunky and a great gal." As she wiped down our table she chuckled, "I can see why he's so smitten over you."

I blinked at her stupidly, "Who's smitten with me!?"

She giggled cutely, coyly using her palm to cover her mouth, "Why it's so blatantly obvious! It's—"

"_Hello_ _ladies_," a deep voice rumbled sensually, drawing out a long, audible purr on the last word.

Both of us peered up. Bowser grinned, looming overhead like a cloud over the sun. Koopie straightened up, dropping a towel, "M-My Lord?"

"Can a guy Koopa get in on this?" he smirked.

Koopie looked completely horrified, "Y-You're majesty?! Oh Stars! There's absolutely no way I'm going to allow you to help me clean! What will the council think? O-Or my parents?!"

Bowser smirked, "If the redhead is allowed to wipe tables then I most certainly can clean too. Lil' lady, you can consider it an order if that'll help you."

Koopie still looked uneasy, even smoothing a few stray curls from her face, "V-Very well then…"

And that's how Bowser joined in on our cleaning spree. But let it be known he was terrible at wiping down counters. In fact he was so bad, he broke two chairs and nearly splintered a table. So Koopie wisely delegated the task of wiping tables down to me as she cleaned the floor.

As Koopie swept, I washed a peppermint-patterned tabletop. Koopie wiped her forehead and smiled, "Woo! Almost done! Just have to sweep down one last spot and—"

Bowser lifted the said table with one arm. I squeaked, hurriedly grabbing on least I fall to the floor. From the tops of the table I stared down at them in surprise. Koopie blinked as Bowser grinned arrogantly. He even had the nerve to start bench-pressing the table _with me on it_.

"Stars, my King," Koopie cooed, all but swooning, "You're so strong~!"

"Oh geesh," I groaned, shaking my head. Compliments only made Bowser _worse._

"Hmm," still relishing the attention and the compliment, Bowser smirked, "I am sexifully strong, aren't I Flower?"

"…Please just put the table down and let me go…"

Bowser laughed, before turning his attention to Koopie. He leaned in, staring at her face with interest, "You know, you're a pretty lil' Koopette, well-mannered and cute. You seeing anyone?"

Her cheeks flushed, voice coming out in a startled squeak, _"M-M-Milord_!?"

He laughed as he continued to bench-press the table, "Sorry sweetheart but you were born a few years too late to enjoy this studliness. I've got seven handsome sons. Well, Junior _might_ be a little too young."

Koopie continued to blush, staring at the floor, "Y-You're trying to set me up with one of your sons? A D-Darklandian prince?"

He grinned wickedly, "Want one? I've got seven sons...Seven, _handsome, strong, rich_ sons who could be married to a certain, cute lil' shop owner...?"

Koopie's pretty face glowed even brighter as she gaped at Bowser wordlessly, "Uh...?"

"Quit flustering her you jerk," I snapped.

Bowser laughed, "Ah, don't worry Flower. I'll be back to making you blush in a second."

Koopie continued to clean quietly, face pink with blush.

Once the shoppe was clean it was time we headed out. We said good bye to the pretty store owner who smiled warmly. Koopie hugged Junior and—when Bowser wasn't looking—slipped an extra lollipop into his goodie bag.

The King and I gave Koopie a hearty tip and as gracious as she was, she refused humbly. Bowser had a plan up his sleeve; he mentioned his handsome sons again and took the embarrassment further. He mentioned a son named 'Ludwig' and talked about how cute their children would be.

"I can see your kids with his blue mane and your pretty dimples," he laughed at Koopie's mortification.

Koopie was cherry-red by the time we left and happily _accepted _the tip. Just to get him to shut up, I'm sure. As we left the store Junior groaned about a stomachache and I took the opportunity to punch Bowser in the arm. He chuckled, grinning, "What? I didn't do anything."

I stomped my foot, "I can't believe you did that!"

His grin grew more sinful, "Did _what?_"

"You know what you did! That stupid finger-licking thing! And in public!"

"Oh?" he purred, leaning closer, "I understand. Next time do that kind of stuff when we're alone huh?"

"Why you—!" I turned around and flung a flying elbow into his gut. My elbowed bounced pathetically off his plastron,"Oh oww!"

"Wow…didn't expect a flying ninja elbow there," he blinked at me, "So…did that work well?"

"No! And I think I bruised my elbow too!"

"Well, so much for that…"

We stared at each other in silence before breaking out into laughter. I held onto him as he wrapped a firm arm around my back, "Stars you're so silly," I wheezed, wiping a tear away.

"And you love me for it," he purred, "Now let's get your cute caboose back into the Clown car. We'll head to the keep so you can get your stuff before you go back to Sarasaland."

Junior hopped in and as I tried to climb up, Bowser wrapped his arms around me, "Are you ever gonna learn? Or are you going to keep on trying to get in yourself?"

Smiling, I rolled my eyes, "Oh whatever."

He deposited me gently into the jowls of the clown car. I took a seat and as was becoming routine, Junior hurriedly crawled his way onto my lap. The Clown car took off, headed for the notorious Bowser's keep. As the sky started to yellow from sunset, Junior curled on my lap, snoozing. I snuck at peek at Bowser.

His expression was contemplative, relaxed.

As the wind whipped through my hair and as I sat here, stroking Junior's soft mane, somehow this moment felt right. The feel of the soft, golden sunlight upon my skin, the weight of Junior on my lap; everything felt right. Even the occasional glances Bowser would toss my way when he thought I wasn't looking.

I closed my eyes and sighed; this all felt so comfortable and right.

* * *

><p>Saying goodbye to his pretty little Flower was difficult. Difficult in the same sense a fight against Mario was taxing but with his battles against the midget plumber, he could handle the physical pains dealt against him.<p>

But when she left...

When Flower left he didn't know how to heal those wounds. His heartached as if he had eaten an overly greasy, fatty burrito and the only medicine for those weird, Flower-induced heartaches was to see her again.

They entered the golden Sarasaland border and again the Koopa King felt that weird, nauseating heartache again. The only silver lining was being able to drop Flower off at her room. Not exactly Koopeo and Juliette, but _eh_.

Heads turned as the Sarasalandian guards watched the clown car fly overheard. A couple of townspeople and staff members peered out of the palace windows, unfamiliar to the clown car's spinning turbines.

The townspeople stared before returning back to their normal business. After a while even the guards grew bored of the car clown's presence. Bowser would not admit it out loud but it felt good not to be feared. He always suspected the citizenry of Sarasaland were far tougher than those of the Mushroom Kingdom and so far he was proven right.

Just the sight of him and an uttered, 'boo' was enough to make the toads of the Mushroom kingdom scatter like cockroaches. But let's not pretend the Sarasaland citizens were one hundred percent cool with him. What was the word? They simply tolerated him.

The occasional sharp, hostile look from the guards presented a loud, clear, '_If you hurt or harm our princess in anyway then we're coming after your head_.' Bowser smirked at the thought of _them _trying to threaten _him_; granted these desert people had little idea who they were dealing with, he liked their spirit. If he so truly wished, he could destroy the so-called _great_ hero Mario with an effortless snap of his measly spine.

There were times when the idea of snapping Mario in half registered in his mind—particularly when Mario managed to _really_ piss him off—but with Mario gone, then who would entertain him?

Out of the corner of his eyes he glanced at his Flower. She was standing, leaned over the bowl of the clown car with a mellow expression. Under the setting sun's romantic caress, her bright blue eyes were nearly neon; captivated far away in a daydream.

_Damn, she's gorgeous._

In the setting sun her hair exploded in a heat of flaming reds and browns. If he attacked the Sarasaland Kingdom, would she defend her people? He couldn't see her running and hiding like a scared child.

_Ahem. Peach._

He could see her taking arms against him like a war heroine. Any woman—no—any human strong enough to blow fire had to be a vicious warrior. He could see it now; her long, thick hair flowing behind her like a deep cherry halo, those pretty eyes of hers hot with anger and strength and he could imagine those dusky pink lips of hers snared in a fierce snarl.

The idea of Daisy wearing armor made him nearly_ drool_. There was a soft chuckle and the king Koopa broke away from his dream world. He looked upon the heroine of his own story, his own life as she arched a playful eyebrow. She placed her hands on her hips coyly, "In daydream land Bowwy?"

_Oh yeah_, she would definitely be a woman warrior. He was so taken by her that he nearly forgot her stupid petname. With his usual growl, he lowered his head, staring her right in the eye.

_Those gorgeous eyes._

Most people would wet themselves with fear but Daisy's smile only grew larger and more audacious. He pretended to be angry as he glowered, but he only lingered to smell her divine scent; like an explosion of Koopa berries.

"I thought I told you," he growled, hoping she'd notice the extra bass in his voice; women liked sexy deep voices, "not to call me that dumb name again."

He nudged her lightly in the stomach—not with his elbow like usual, but with a claw this time—just reaching for a cheap excuse to touch her. Tingles ran through his claws. She laughed and her sparkling smile nearly had him smiling back.

But hardened, callous kings didn't smile, even in the presence of pretty, powerful women. Her smile made his mind blank and he forgot he was touching her. Daisy took his large claw within her dainty little hands—yes, despite what she thought of herself she was extremely soft and womanly—and held it.

"Well here we are," Flower smiled, sapphire-blue eyes contrasting beautifully against her dark complexion, "Thanks for the ride Bowser."

"Hey it's my pleasure," he growled, hoping she'd notice how deep and masculine his voice sounded.

She tossed one last smile and looked at Junior. Her eyes softened, smile brightening as she took a knee, "Give me a goodbye hug Junior?"

"Aww you don't even have to ask Mama!" he chirruped happily, tail wagging.

The tiny Koopaling went in and hugged her hard. Bowser had half the mind to tell Brat Jr. to let go of her; that stupid half pint enjoyed the hug too much. Bowser crossed his arms and snarled, smoke wafting from his nose; why did _Junior_ get the truest of all her smiles!? And she hugged him with no reserve!

When she hugged him, King Studmaster, Daisy _barely_ touched him and _didn't press her body_ up against him.

_Damn_.

But when she hugged Junior, the little brat was always ended up so nicely nuzzled into her bosom it was maddening and yet she thought nothing of it! That lucky little _booger_...

_Double damn_.

That little brat was so lucky, why if he was in Junior's spot, he would _so_ milk it for all it was worth. Bowser felt heady and nearly had a nose bleed at the thought of being able to nuzzle—_burrow_ deeply into that chest of hers.

_Squishie, squishie! She always smells so nice and I bet she's_ so soft. _Her skin is soft like the ass of a new born Koopaling. Wow. Okay, that was a weird thought, let's get back to sexy-sexy time. Daisy's rack? Right. Wonder what bra size she wears...I bet she's really soft. My hands are huge so I'd have to be really careful touching her…_

Daisy pulled away from Junior smiling, "You be good for me okay?"

" 'Kay!" he chirruped nodding his head, "I'll miss you Mama Daisy."

Her eyes fluttered shut as she pressed a soft kiss upon the Koopaling's snout, "I'll miss you too cutie. Bye Junior!"

The king curled his fists in ill-restrained ire; why that little snot got a _kiss_! First he gets access to her boobies and now he gets a smooch!?

_Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn!_

"Bye Mama Daisy!" Junior waved to her.

Bowser snarled, glaring at his son with a blazing envy. How come Flower always hesitated with snogging _him_!? Yet she could easily show affection with Junior?!

Yeah, he had already heard her say '_Junior's just a child! I'm treating him like a mother would and blah blah blah!' _The Koopa king chuckled to himself at the thought of putting himself into Junior's body; oh all the things he could get away with. He could 'accidentally' walk in on her changing, or showering.

"See ya later King Bowser!"

"Huh?"

Bowser snapped to attention. Daisy stood on her alabaster balcony, sending him a mischievous smirk. A twinge of guilt washed through him; did she hop from the clown car on her own? Stars he was stupid, she could have hurt herself. His Flower may have been beautiful and spunky, but she was clumsy as hell.

He could recall all the times she had slipped, tripped over absolutely _nothing_. At first he thought it was the coat of wax on the floor at his palace but then he just realized she really _sucked_ with her equilibrium.

Or something.

_I've never seen someone trip over thin air...But Stars, she's managed to do it somehow..._

He drank in her image as she stood on the balcony and he realized Flower was wearing her usual golden princess gown again. He had gotten used to seeing her in street clothes. When she was in her kingdom she wasn't Flower but the delicate Princess Sarasaland.

But even still, she wore the hell out of that dress. Her waist looked nice and petite and her body looked killer! Also her flowery brooch gave him an out to staring shamelessly at her chest. With an arched eyebrow the king of all koopas smirked; heh her rack was _way_ bigger than Peach's. Oh he'd give up all of his trillions of coins in a heartbeat if only he could touch…Let alone squeeze...

"Hey! I said later King Bowser!" she even tossed a wink at him. In one hand she held her new fireflower and with her free hand she waved.

That smirk, that wink, and the way her tan skin glowed under the waning sunlight, she was _hot_. It took a great deal of restraint not to hop down on that balcony, throw her over his shoulder and take her back home with him.

But he settled for a gruff, manly, "Yeah later Princess Daisy. Take care of Firefly."

"Bye Mama!" Junior called, waving down at her.

"Bye BJ!"

Even Firefly chirped happily at them. With the good byes done, he gripped the yolk firmly in his claws and spun that badboy around to head back home. He didn't bother looking back at the fading palace because he knew his princess was back there.

The Flower-induced heartache syndrome began and he almost felt light-headed, unsteady on his feet. But he had to leave her there, because it was her home…

As that unexplainable pain in his chest squeezed tightly, he began to mentally chant a mantra to reconcile his frantic heart. It was her home…she belonged there. She was safe at home…It was her home…She belonged in Sarasaland…She was safe…She would be back with him in a week….She would be back _with him_….

After more mental mantra, it was nearly half an hour when they started to leave the Sarasaland borders. As Junior was seated in the back, scribbling more doodles of his, the king of koopas was lost in his thoughts.

The object of his thoughts began to morph from the pretty face of the Sarasaland princess into the masculine, stolid face of the ninji leader. Every single feature of his face was hidden under red cloak but those piercing blue eyes.

Bowser nearly snarled out loud as his claws gripped the yolk tighter; those cowardly bastards had kidnapped his youngest child and the princess just to send a message to him. In all his reign as king no one had ever been stupid enough to threaten him or his family. There was only one being out there that posed a real threat to him. And it wasn't that short, stubby red plumber either.

True, Mario was pretty strong for a human but that's just where it ended. In his fights against Mario, the king of koopas clearly held back. If his punches could break through stones and his arms were sturdy enough to pull islands, then by no means was breaking Mario's spine any kind of special feat.

The only threat was _him_. Bowser snarled unconsciously at the thought of his foe. Once he got home and put Junior to bed, he'd have to have a meeting with his advisors. Even when he had been at Koopie's with Junior and Flower; he couldn't help but think of _him_. What was he going to do? How could he keep from worrying Daisy?

And how could he protect Flower? Should he alert Emperor Sakuro that his daughter could be in danger? If that freak was going after his son and Flower, then things were going to become far more complicated.

Bowser growled at the thought of such cowardice; going after him was one thing but using his son and the princess of Sarasaland as leverage was another.

A total puss move and he really didn't want to worry his Flower about this. There was a lurking evil, one that would scare her stupid if she only knew the amount of cruelty and madness that saturated that being…

Bowser frowned; telling Daisy about this would only worry her.

She couldn't know about this.

And she wouldn't.

* * *

><p>Alice: Read and Review! Hope you enjoyed! ^_^<p> 


	8. Horns: Kick off!

Alice**: **(puts on swimming goggles) Well, it's about that time again to go swimming…in reviews that is! Also I've received quite a few PMs and lots of readers/reviewers want to know just exactly who the infamous _him _is XD

Ultrra: (sipping lemonade) Him? The red ninja guy? You already told us that he's not an OC. He's the dude in the Mario Sports games with that one…pink-haired mage…girl XD

Alice: Nooo not him. _HIM_ the guy Bowser doesn't like.

Ultrra: (blinks) Is _HIM _an actual Mario character?

Alice: Chyeah! XD I won't say this is a clue as to who he is but I feel that 85% of my readers and reviewers have played a game with him in it or have at least heard of him. When he was first introduced he scared me. To. Death! O_O

Ultrra: Alice…_cats_ will scare you if they come out of nowhere. U_U

Alice: Point is I think he's scary! (Jumps off diving board and into reviews) BONZAI!

Ultrra: Really? (Holds up a sign) I give the technique a seven, but the splash was definitely an eight.

Alice: (Swims to the side of the pool and grins) My reviewers….you guys are AWESOME! I'm so happy, I feel as if I can faint. Siiiiigh!

Ultrra: I'm sure 85% of your reviewers think you've gone off the deep end.

Alice: (blinks) But I have gone off the deep end already…

Ultrra: (Snickers) No! I don't mean the deep of the review pool, but the deep end…of sanity…

Alice: (frowns) THAT'S NOT TRUE!

Ultrra: Oh it's true.

Alice: NO!

Ultrra: XD The truth hurts, but it also will set you freeeee!

Alice:…Oh that reminds me! (snaps fingers) In this chapter we'll get to see a bit of the Mario team! Luigi, Yoshi, Peach…Toad…Also, I super rushed to get this chapter out because you guys have been amazing with the reviews. So hopefully you guys can overlook any of my petty typos. (bows)

Ultrra: Look at you; you've got an attention span shorter than a chipmunk. And that's offensive to chipmunks! U_U

Alice: Not true! ;_; I just…(thinks of the story) Which reminds me…

Ultrra: SEE! XD

Alice:…Jerkssaywhat.

Ultrra: …Huh? What did you say?

Alice: HA! (turns to reviewers) I…don't want to give away TOO much of the chapter, but I realize that in the second superstriker game you can play as Bowser. So I know each captain has a set team name (or I think they do O_o ) but for this chapter there's going to be two co-captains and one captain to each team! Cool idea eh? =)

Ultrra: Seriously, what did you say! (looks around) I hope you didn't hex me…

Alice: I've played soccer for awhile, so I know all the positions and how the tide of the game goes. XP Anyways enjoy the story and R and R baby!

Ultrra:…Do my legs still work! Can I still stand?

Alice: O_O I didn't put a spell on you!

Ultrra: When Sabrina the teenage does it, it's called a spell, but when _you_ do it! It's called a curse!

Alice:… (turns to reviewers and shrugs) XP

* * *

><p><strong><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>**

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>"<em>So how has the delegate business been going?" <em>The airy, sweet voice of my cousin wafted through my phone,_ "Uncle Sakuro has told me the Darklands is upstarting brand new businesses within your borders."_

"Uh huh, it's been going well."

_"Superb! My, I never thought I'd see the day when the Darklands would want to start business anywhere outside of its own Kingdom! Odd…It's as if King Bowser has had a true change of heart…"_

While Peach chattered happily away in my ear, my thoughts drifted elsewhere. Today I was in Golden Star City,fifteen minutes outside of the grand palace and instead of wearing my customary crown, I donned a yellow hardhat.

The construction site was bustling with goombas, dry bones, Parakoopas, snifits and shyguys and it was noisy! The planning and building of an irrigation system was underway courtesy of our new alliance with the Darklands.

I watched as Sarasalandians and Darklanders worked together for the betterment of our kingdom. It was symbolic; the combination of two peoples working towards world improvement.

Though I relaxed under the shade of palm trees, I found myself constantly wiping a spatter of sweat off my forehead. The heat was a smoldering one hundred and ten degrees and I had no clue how the construction workers hadn't fainted under such heat.

_"—has been wanting to see you for awhile. I think he's been sweet on you for quite sometime now. I just mention your name and he blushes as red as Mario's clothes!"_

"You don't say?"

_"—new SuperStriker rules! Mario, Luigi and I will play a game tonight! Exciting no?"_

"Uh huh…"

Peach's voice faded into incoherent garble as I took a mental vacation. I was supposed to be taking notes of any materials the construction workers might need but my mind journeyed elsewhere. I had a strong longing to be back in the Darklands.

My stays in the Darklands had been nothing but spectacular, it was a real queen's treatment; I was waited on hand and foot and pampered. Bowser, king of the most prosperous kingdom managed to arrange his schedule to spend playtime with me. Then there were the rare times when he was busy with kingdom related business but even then that didn't prevent him from spoiling me.

_"—bet you're not listening to one single word I'm saying are you!"_

Some mornings I would awake to a room filled with hundreds of daisy bouquets and ever since he found out I was fond of candies Koopie made, I've had hundreds, if not thousands of blueberry chocolate-covered koopa kisses delivered to me in Sarasaland.

_"_—_going to do something you won't like if you won't listen!"_

I've had servants fill cupboards, closets and even take some home for themselves and the palace _still _is filled with chocolate. I'm pretty sure just this week alone I've gained ten pounds from eating all that delicious chocolate. I wrote Bowser, expressing my chocolate woes and how I'd end up ballooning and gaining weight. He told me to model a bikini and he would tell me the truth.

_Riiiight._

_"DAISY!" _

The shriek trilled, rising from my cell phone's receiver in a hellish pitch. Even as a kid Peach had a shrill scream, so of course she decides to use _that _scream into my ear.

I probably won't hear correctly for another two weeks! I snarled into the phone, ears still pounding, "What Peach! _WHAT?!_"

An indignant sniffle followed, _"See? If you had been listening to me this whole time I wouldn't have done that."_

"Well you have my attention now," I stuck my finger in my ear, hoping to make the ringing stop.

_"Well I told you about the new Superstriker rules if you were listening. There's now three cap—Oh drat! Something's come up and I must see to it-"_

"It's fine," I said, watching as three Parakoopas looked over a sheet of blue prints, "I've got to look interested in the construction project anyways."

_"Call me later on in the week?"_

"I will. Now goodbye Pink."

_"Ciao Yellow."_

The moment I hung up a Parakoopa landed at my table. She bowed then approached with a large brown box in hand.

"Princess Daisy?" the Parakoopa raised her goggles and smiled.

"Yes that's me, how may I help you?"

"I have a delivery from a…studly, highly masculine friend of yours." I laughed, instantly knowing whom she spoke of.

I shook my head, smiling, "Alright then. Tell your _friend_ that 'Flower' said to 'get over himself fast and thank you.'

"I shall deliver your message promptly and efficiently ma'am!" the Paratroopa saluted, "This message has been delivered courtesy of the royal Paratroopa mail services. 'If we've got wings, so does your mail.'"

After the plug she saluted and took off into the sky like a rocket. Once the Parakoopa disappeared from sight, I turned to study the package. I shook my head; what could Bowser have gotten me _this_ time!?

I glanced at the clock tower in the center of town; _I could let these guys go a bit early. They've certainly earned it. _I walked over to the circle of construction workers and architects. At my approach they halted conversation and turned to me.

"I'm very pleased with the progress here," I grinned, making sure to look every man in the eye, "I have many good things to report to King Bowser about. He'll be pleased to hear all you've done for us."

"Please princess, such praise isn't necessary," A shyguy said bashfully.

"It's a quarter til three," I beamed at them, "I think you guys earned the rest of the evening off."

The cheers were loud and mirthful as the construction team began to pack up their things for the day. As the crew eagerly cleaned up for the day, they sang their thanks. Once the site was cleared up, I returned home. I rushed to my room, ready to unwrap my gift.

Maybe it was more chocolate-covered blue berry koopa kisses! Or a six-pack of Flash tonic so I could perfect fire-breathing? What if it was something ridiculous like lingerie!? Bowser may be crude and joke about it but he _has_ to be pulling my leg.

Right?

I turned through another hallway and nearly ran into an_ idiot._ I glare and—_oh no._ Standing before me in all his composure and poise was Father. Even in the hottest of the desert weather, he never appeared flustered.

Beside him was a royal Sarasalandian elder. Salini had served our royal family for decades even before my father's time. He had counciled my grandmother, father, and when I become Queen he shall serve in my cabinet.

Or maybe he would _croak _by then.

…Okay, sounds mean but here's the story.

Though I've known this man for the majority of my life, I can't stand him. I can't recall a single good thing he's done for me. I wouldn't be surprised if he had went out of his way to make sure my life was painful.

He was a jerk!

While I stared at Salini, Father cleared his throat, "Princess Sarasaland where are you off to in such a hurry?"

His expression was completely neutral as he awaited my response. It was then I realized a mistake I made; I forgot to greet Father with a proper curtsy. I fell into a sloppy, graceless curtsy that had Salini sneering. Father remained unmoved but nodded his acknowledgement. I'm pretty sure if father wasn't here Salini would have chewed me out for a lack of proper etiquette.

"I wonder what pressing matters hold my daughter's attention so." His smooth tenor held no infections as he spoke.

I blushed as Elder Salini chuckled, "His majesty has a valid point, where are you going in such a rush? The princess of Sarasaland does not need to rush to meet anyone's agenda."

"I…uh…" my eyes darted away from Father's steely blue eyes.

"Is that a gift?"

"Yes…father."

"From a friend?" Salini narrowed his eyes a bit, "A_ male_ friend?"

"Yes…" I squeaked even higher than last.

"You've certainly been busy princess, writing your anonymous penpal," Salini's eyes sharpened.

I fought to keep the glare from my face; who was Salini to monitor my activities? He may have had the right to when I was a young girl but that had been years ago.

Hmm, how can I tell him to 'piss off' or 'go fall off a camel' without sounding so crude or offensive?

Father's expression turned pensive, "Is this the same companion who sent all those chocolates?"

"…Chocolate?" Salini asked.

Father walked over to a window, the glimmer of thought sparkling in his eyes,"Yes my king."

"I see…"

As Father looked over the golden sands of Sarasaland, I bit my lip nervously. He didn't seem angry...

"Then you have my approval."

I choked, "_Huh!_?"

"Your lordship…?" Salini asked, if a bit disbelievingly.

"You have my approval to continue this friendship with your companion," when he spun to face me, I was surprised to see just the lightest touches of a smile on his face, "perhaps it will lead to courtship in the future."

Salini looked a bit surprised as a slow smile crawled upon my face and I curtsied yet again, "T-Thank you Dad."

Father froze. _Oh crap_, I just called him dad. It was proper to refer to him as either father or king. I haven't called him 'dad' in _ages. _There was nothing but dead silence as surprise flitted over his features.

I grew pale, "I-I'm sorry, I meant father. T-Thank you for your generosity."

"There was no harm done, daughter." Even though Father wasn't smiling, his glacial blues seemed warmer, "You may take your leave now princess."

"Yes my king." With one last curtsy I flounced away, heading to my room in a hurry. I did not want to screw up again so soon.

* * *

><p>Seldor Salini turned to look at the emperor. He was twenty years the monarch's senior, old enough to be the king's father even. Where the emperor was gifted with beautiful angular features and sharp, feline eyes, Salini was nothing but leathery wrinkles and squinty eyes.<p>

"My lordship, if I am not too brazen with this statement, don't you feel that something is amiss?"

Sakuro glanced over at the councilman, "How so?"

The Emperor had a meeting within half an hour so the two men walked together through the halls and towards an available courtroom. Seldor was silent, thinking over his words. The emperor turned to look at Seldor with his infamous neutrality.

The two of them had worked towards Sarasaland's prosperity for decades together. So when the two of them were alone, all decorated diction and hidden sentiments were voided. Salini had associated with the royal family for at least three decades and even his own son had served as a royal playmate for Princess Daisy.

The old councilor had known the emperor since he was a child and with those years of service to the crown, he had earned his right to tell the emperor whatever he wanted.

"Let's not be coy here Sakuro," he spoke in a grave whisper,"you and I both know that parcel was shipped from the Darklands. We can bury our heads in the sand but we would be foolish to ignore the Darklandian palace's royal address upon that box."

They entered the throne room, completely void of any other staff. Sakuro took the throne, sitting with an effortless decor and poise. While Salini hovered nearby, boring a severe stare into his king, the said monarch patiently folded his hands into his lap.

"You and I both know sire that nothing good lies over those borders," Salini spoke, "We are far too trusting of them."

"Yes and as a result we had the parcel x-rayed several times before it even arrived into Sarasaland borders, then it went through another set of security measures before it was delivered to the Parakoopa mail services."

The Emperor's blue eyes glinted, "And was there anything dangerous inside that box?"

"No," Salini didn't quite snap but he was certainly agitated, "but that's not the point. The point—one we both realize—is the King of Koopas is exchanging gifts with our princess. The demon king of all people! The madness of it all!"

"And the problem with that would be…?"

"Do not pretend to be naive or foolish your lordship," Salini snarled, "Any man who gives a woman a gift is far more interested in _her_ than some commerce business trade. The koopa has his eyes set on our princess. This is a matter that should frighten us all."

There it was, Salini opened pandora's box and laid the true problem out on the proverbial table. However neither person had been ignorant of it even before then. Sakuro sat silently and Salini was a bit dismayed to see his expression hadn't altered.

It was great to have a stolid, objective ruler when dealing with other haughty rulers and foreign business. Sakuro's placid and cool temperament was a trait even Salini admired about his king, however whenever they butted heads on an issue, it was a true pain when one could not sway the emperor in their favor.

No one would believe the emperor of Sarasaland was such an obstinate man. He may have had porcelain skin, long ebon locks and crystal blue eyes, yet his regal appearance hid his true adamant nature.

"We shall continue to monitor the situation," Sakuro spoke without a single inflection in his voice, "I do not see the harm in a few friendly correspondences, especially with an ally as powerful as Lord Bowser. Their friendship nicely solidifies our position as a dear ally. I was hoping you would treasure that, Councilman."

"Ally and romantic interest are two very different things your grace," the emperor didn't miss the note of anger in his voice, "It would not do to have a Koopa pursuing our princess."

"Thank you and I shall keep that in mind. Rest easy knowing progress will be carefully monitored. Now then if you will councilor I have many matters to see to."

Salini bowed, being able to hide his apparent disdain more cleverly, "Of course."

* * *

><p>The moment I opened the doors to my bedchambers, Firefly chirruped an earnest greeting. I looked over at my new baby pet and grinned, "Hey to you too cutie!"<p>

I closed my doors and descended upon the gift immediately. I grinned like a maniac as I tore away at the box. I halted. The first item was a large letter in a pink envelope and the second was a bright apple-green envelope. I laughed, seeing one was addressed from Wendy as the other was from Junior.

Grinning I opened both of my letters. I plopped onto my bed to read Wendy's letter first:

_Dearest Dai,_

_Hey girl! How goes things in Sarasaland? Omigosh I heard like, the temperature this whole week was well above one hundred! Now it's like hot in the Darklands too but omigosh one hundred degrees! Yuck!_

_I've heard soooo much that you and King Daddy did together! I'm kinda jealous that you took brat junior to Koopie's Sweeties! Her upside-down apple crème tart is to die for! Ahem, but I shouldn't talk about that since I'm on this very strict diet that'll get me to be even more perfect than before! _

_Well maybe when I get a free weekend, I'll have to see you soon! We'll have to have another girl's day out, 'cause that was too fun! Well, I just wanted to say hi and I'll keep things short and sweet. Seeya soon Dai and continue to keep King Daddy on his toes!_

~_Wondrous Wendy_

I opened Junior's letter. I was surprised they were learning to write in kindergarten. But I guess when your dad was the king of the most powerful kingdom, you had the best of the best.

_Hi Mama Daiz!_

_I had fun wih u and Kig Dad ths weknd. I realy lik u and hop u wil be my Mama Daiz. I lik the colr of ur hair and how nic u smel. Kig Dad liks u to._

_-Bowser Jr._

Aww, I'll have to write back both Wendy and cutie Jr. But for now, let's have a look-see in this box. I carefully pulled out a brand new black soccer uniform top. It was crested with my signature number nine, mounted in a deep blood-red. Don't get me wrong, it looks awesome but my colors were green and orange in the Super Striker league.

I studied the front of the uniform and gasped; there was a deep red Darklandian team logo. _Wait, just what was this about?_ I continued to fish through the box and pulled out a pair of matching black and red shorts and metal armor.

I peered at the uniform, trying to wrap my head around what this meant. I ran my fingers over the dark material of the shirt and found myself to be thoroughly impressed; koopasilk, one of the most expensive cuts of cloth out there; smooth like mushroomsilk but durable like goombawool.

The uniform looked good but the top was smaller, tighter and the shorts were _far _shorter. I blushed; Stars I thought my old SuperStriker uniform was scandalous but this one has even less material to wear!

_Might as well wear this as a swimsuit..._

Ooh, there was a black choker necklace, elbow-length gloves and a black lace garner for me to wear on my leg! At the bottom of the box was a letter. I picked it up and squinted at the surprisingly neat cursive. Huh, who knew Bowser had such nice handwriting?

My handwriting was chicken scratch. You'd think because my parents had such fine, gorgeous penmanship that I'd have it too.

Haha no, not by a long shot.

_'Flower,_

_Kickoff starts at 8:00 pm sharp. Here's a little 411 on the game: Each team is now allowed to have two co-captains and one captain. You and Junior can duke it out to see who's first or second co-captain. I know how you Sarasaland people suck at keeping time for appointments so here's your friendly reminder to bring that long-legged body of yours to my Bowser Coliseum on time._

_Just arrive at the Keep and Kammy will warp you to the Stadium. Even if you do show up late nothing will save you from my wrath, not even the swing of your hair or hips._

_Signed His studliness,_

_King Bowser'_

This was a magical paper Kammy had created for us in case father didn't approve of my letter sending. Bowser had a matching sheet of paper that served as a mate to mine. Named the Sneaksheet for its surreptitious use, it was a rather ingenious invention.

Once I started to write on my sheet, he would be able to read it from his paper. I dipped my quill in ink and began to scribble a note back to him.

_'Egomaniac,_

_I've decided to join your crazy team because I want to see Junior's cute face again and two, you're gonna have an exclusive chance to see how a pro plays soccer. And stop calling yourself 'studly' it makes my skin crawl._

_~Princess Dai_

I chuckled as the print faded away, probably beginning to appear on Bowser's paper. My grin grew larger as I saw Bowser's scrawl starting to appear on my paper. Ha cool, he was writing this _right_ now!

_'Fire Flower,_

_Do not even pretend my studly ways don't entice you. See you tonight then blue eyes! Ps your handwriting really does blow. Perhaps I ought to sign you up for writing classes with Junior. He told me his class is learning how to write their alphabets this week and sounds like you can join in. Even he can show you a thing or two._

_-The studmaster_

I decided to humor him one last time and I wrote a quick note.

_Fire breath,_

_I just want to let you know right now I'm not laughing with you but at you. And yes my handwriting sucks! But seriously? Kick shells you overgrown turtle._

_~Ruby red _

I chuckled and began to pack my things. I placed the uniform back in its box and had a servant began to load it into my carriage. You're probably wondering how in the_ world_ my overprotective father and Sarasaland council is even allowing me to stay with King Bowser for the weekend.

Well…

Ever since I've been to the Darklands, Bowser has been approving any and _all_ treaties Sarasaland has even dreamed of. Originally the Mushroom Kingdom had been our best ally but I'm starting to think that's going to change. The Darklands is far wealthier and is willing to financially back the majority of our new projects.

Granted the Mushroom kingdom will probably always be our strongest supporter due in large part to our monarchs being direct blood relatives, but so much new growth has taken place in Sarasaland within these few weeks.

Construction projects we once dreamed of are being finalized, blue prints are being drawn up and improved irrigation systems are being installed. It's wonderful! But what's really funny is how everyone here sings my praise about being such a good diplomat but in reality all I've been doing in the Darklands is playing all day with Bowser and being spoiled by his staff.

With all the progress being made in Sarasaland, my once skeptical father was all but thrilled when I take my leave for the weekends. As long as the commerce between the Darklands and our kingdom is superb, my father would probably let me _live_ with Bowser.

But in the back of my mind I had to wonder: what was the Darklands _really _doing? Out of the blue they're suddenly interested in expanding business into the Sarasaland border and they're all but bending over backwards to help us.

It just doesn't make sense…

Oh well, if I was going to be in the Darklands before eight pm I'd have to be ready to leave soon. My suitcase was packed, Firefly in hand, I was ready to jet.

Grinning, I held up the flower pot, "You ready to go back and see Bowser?"

I laughed at Firefly's happy chirrup. I gathered my belongings and a pitcher of water for my fireflower. Although he may have been a fireflower that could tolerate and thrive in the hottest of all temperatures, I still needed to pamper him with as much water as I could. He was just a baby plant after all.

Firefly swayed happily in my arms as I bid father farewell. Once inside the carriage, I set to work and began to look over more Sarasalandian documents. Firefly glowed brightly, providing more than enough light for sight. Dipping my quill in ink, I continued to hurriedly scribble.

* * *

><p>By the time I arrived at the palace, I was already suited up in my Darkland Super Striker Charged armor and uniform. The uniform was definitely more revealing and I hoped this wouldn't be a widely televised event. I hopped out of my carriage, tugging down my top and shorts for good measure before walking over towards the gate.<p>

_Stars, I can't believe this is a uniform...Feels like I forgot the rest of my clothes..._

As I walked past the line of guards, their countenances were stoic but once they did a double-take, their eyes bulged and mouths dropped. I ducked my head, hiding my flagrant blush as the koopas on patrol all but _stared_.

Kammy waited at the keep's front gate. She spotted me and 'poofed' to my location, "Lady Daisy, I hope your journey was pleasant?"

"Yeah it was," I grinned, "Now would you direct me to your soccer stadium? I've got as—er—butts to kick. Also could you look after Firefly? His plant food formula is mixed and he drinks right out of his bottle."

"Of course," She muttered a spell under her breath and the next thing I knew, we disappeared. The second I opened my eyes, I was in front of a locker room that said, 'Home.'

I glanced back at Kammy, "Can I just walk in or is this a boy's locker room?"

Kammy clucked suspiciously in a manner like a laugh, "I'm very sure princess by now the king has everyone dressed and ready to go. But if you see anything you haven't before, just cover your eyes and scream!"

I stepped inside the locker room just as a deafening roar rattled the walls; yep it sounded like a bunch of Koopas were ready to play soccer. Or commit a murder spree, same difference really. As I stepped passed the lockers, I was awed at how nice the place was. The facility appeared brand new, with gleaming showers and even personalized lockers for the players.

The Darklandian Dragon symbol—a red Bowser face with a black backdrop—was on every locker, towel, weight, banner, and product within the room. Once I went passed the final row of black and red lockers, I found myself staring at the back of Bowser's massive shell.

It was the blackest-black, polished with a mirror-finish to match his team's uniform. My appearance roused the boos, hammerbros, drybones and koopas into cheer. Junior, also decked out in a black shell, hopped around happily, "Mama Daisy! Mama Daisy you're here!"

Bowser spun around and grinned, "Well, check _you _out. I've got to say you're looking good in our colors. Damn good."

As the king openly appraised my form, the team's cheers transformed into catcalls and whistles as I blushed. My eyes fell back onto the king Koopa and he was _still _staring, eyes hovering on my exposed legs.

"Well since the first lady of the Darklandian Dragons is accounted for, the team's ready to take the field. You ready to kick ass like a Darklander, princess?"

I laughed, boldly placing my hands upon my hips, "Let's see if _you_ Darklanders can keep up with _me_."

My response roused a rather bloodthirsty cheer from the team and with a dark laugh of his own, Bowser roared viciously, "All claws and hands in…One...two…THREE! _DRAGONS_!"

We released one loud roar and stormed out. Everything about the Super Strikers Charged league was flashy and why shouldn't it be? This was one of the most beloved, most watched sports. The home captains were taken to the air by helicopter and sky-dove onto the field for a spectacular grand entrance.

Since this game allows for two co-captains and a head captain to each team, Junior, Bowser and I were in the air. As the copter gained altitude Junior sat in my lap, blabbing away about how he promised to pass me the ball and do 'sick tricks' on the other team.

Bowser sat beside me, tapping his thigh in a silent rhythm as he watched the copter rise higher above a stadium built in his honor as king. I was amazed, the Bowser Stadium from up here looked magnificent.

The crowd below was a large, noisy multi-colored blob wreathing and moving like a swarm. No one sound was indistinguishable as there was no one face that stood out from one another. There were so many fans and they were so loud! I could feel my heart beating wildly in my chest; Stars, I had never played soccer in front of so many people before…

I felt excited just by the energy they were exuding.

"So Flower…"

"Hmm?"

"What's going through that pretty head of yours?" Bowser half-smirked as he reclined, eyes upon me.

"Stars, there's so many koopas down there and I've never been in front of a crowd that big before."

"Yep and this game's being televised," Bowser added.

"Millions of people will watch me play soccer on tv. It's so cool!" I wrung my hands together and looked up at him as I laughed softly, "I just hope I don't forget how to play. I'm actually starting to get nervous, like really nervous."

"Hey now," Bowser slipped a single claw under my chin gently and brought my face up so our eyes could meet, "I've seen how you play and you're one of the best players I know, koopa, human, guy or girl. You're going to be great."

"...Yeah?" I smiled at him.

"You'll be fine and if you get too nervous, you can know you've got me right beside ya," Bowser winked as he playfully nudged a shoulder into mine.

"And me too Mama!" Junior piped up happily from my lap, "You have me too!"

I laughed, wrapping my arms around the tiny koopa, "Yes and I have you too BJ!"

"I have to say you look pretty good in our colors," Bowser grinned, eyes running over my figure.

I gaped at him for the blatant come-on, "_Bowser_!?"

"Yeeees?" he grinned and even clanked his claws together

I halted, suddenly putting two and two together, "_You _designed my uniform didn't you!?"

He snorted, "That's nonsense. I just told the designers to make a uniform worthy of a Darklandian princess."

And before I could try to choke him out—or at least attempt to—I looked at his arm. Usually he wore four large spiked bracers, two on his wrists and two on his biceps. But on his left arm, he wore a plain black silk band.

Now why did that look familiar? I looked at the lace garner on my thigh; we were wearing matching garners. I blushed; isn't wearing matching stuff something couples would do? This sneaky, over-sized turtle tried to dress us up alike!

"Did you think I wouldn't notice the matching garners!?" I tried to strangle him but he only laughed.

"Come on!" he smirked, "Don't be upset, it looks good on you."

"Hmph," I tried to hide my smile.

"Well," he still laughed, "This sexed up uniform is _way_ better than that tacky orange and green_ crud_ you wore. I mean, Oh Stars was it ugly."

"Hey," despite myself I laughed, "those are Sarasaland colors!"

"Yeah okay," He rolled his eyes, "A jungle green uniform for a kingdom that's nothing but _golden_ sand?" Bowser shook his head, "You Sarasaland people really are kinda batty. Guano even."

I laughed, "The green stands for prosperity and a youthful hope you Debbie Downer."

Smirking, he grabbed my arm, "I'll _show_ you just how much of a Debbie Downer I am."

"Hey! Are you guys ready to rock and roll?" The pilot called over to us.

"Yahoo! Let's get 'em!" Junior threw a fist in the air.

"I have word your opponents just arrived in the guest locker rooms," the pilot spoke, "Your lordship show those 'Shroomies how us Darklanders play some soccer. Go Dragons!"

'Shroomies?' Wait, what was the pilot talking about? Junior rose to his feet hopping around anxiously as Bowser rose to stand. He pulled me to my feet and grinned, "Well are you ready to win?"

"You bet I am!"

The helicopter door opened and the air began to whip wildly into the copter. Bowser grinned, "You first Junior."

Grinning, the small koopa walked all the way backwards until he fell out of the copter. Eyebrow arched at his son's antics, Bowser shook his head as I laughed.

I leaned out of the helicopter just in time to see Junior touchdown for his landing. Even from up here I could hear his personal theme music blaring and the boom of the field announcer's voice, "_One of the brightest little stars of our kingdom and quite the artist! Watch out Leonardo Da Koopa, here comes Priiiiince Booooooooooowser Junior!" _

Bowser smirked, "Rock n' roll, Flower."

"Heh," I stood near the door, overlooking the stadium and drinking in the ambiance of the Darklandian night. The cool Darklandian air playfully nipped and kissed at my exposed skin as the Darklandian skyline burned with glowing city lights.

I glanced back at Bowser and gave him a wink and a thumbs up, "See ya on the ground sweet cheeks!" I punched an armored shoulder.

The look of revolt and shock at such a nickname made me howl with laughter. Before he could try for revenge, I tossed a salute as I hopped out of the plane.

"YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

I closed my eyes, holding out my arms as I dove toward the ground. The air rushed passed my face, streaming through my hair in wintry shots; the sensation of falling was amazing, there was no feeling like it. As the ground came nearer my armor kicked in, automatically slowing my fall until I landed on my feet as gracefully as a lynx. The moment I rose to my feet I was surrounded, engulfed in the electricity of the Bowser stadium.

The cheers of the fans were deafening as thousands of flashing lights glimmered from the dark mass. The arena was filled with several large titron screens and it was heady to see—let alone know—all cameras on me.

I had to see if I was on the jumbo screen! I turned and _voilà_, the large screens displayed my image. Hmm, now I wish I put on make-up or brushed my hair better. Just as my nerves were starting to build, a warm tiny hand clutched my hand. Junior beamed at me.

"Come on Mama Daisy, put on that big smile! Let's show everyone how great we are!"

I smiled back and gripped his hand tighter, "Yeah, let's show everyone how awesome we are!"

With a happy giggle, Junior roared and threw our interlinked hands into the air, "Yeah! Woo!"

_"Oh! And what a fresh breath of air! With glittering eyes and a sparkling personality, here we have the arrival of our foreign flower! Prrrrrrrincess Daaaaaaisy!"_

I waved to the crowd, beaming and even flexing my muscles. Junior tapped my shoulder and whispered a 'cool idea' into my ear. We bust out our 'secret handshake,' which was two rounds of pattycake, then I pointed to Junior who pretended to be electrocuted and when he did the wave back to me, I flexed and we finished with a macho back-to-back pose.

As we finished our jig, the lights in the stadium shut off and the roar of the crowd grew ten times louder, deafening really. I turned to Junior, "What's going on?"

"Just watch Mama!" he grinned, "It's so cool isn't it?"

A large spotlight flashed into the sky, highlighting a plunging figure. The image appeared on the stadium's jumbo screens and the crowd's roar escalated, the thunderous sound of millions of koopas stomping their feet flooded the stands. I was squinting, trying to figure out who was on the screen but when Junior nudged me in the stomach, the grand mystery was solved.

"Look Mama Daisy, it's King Dad!" Junior pointed into the sky, smiling brightly.

I looked up and sure enough there was a growing green speck approaching our side of the field. As he fell from the air, Bowser managed to look both terrifyingly ferocious and content. Bowser landed with a large sonic boom and the moment his massive feet touched the ground, several pyres of fire shot into the air to finish his landing.

The King Koopa basked as the truest and largest star in the stadium. Fans were cheering, taking pictures, screaming; they were electrified.

"_Ladies and Koopa! Did we just see that awesome touchdown?! It is our hero! Our ruler! The baddest koopa in all lands! He's the judge, jury and the executioner; he's the pow in power and the might in mighty! Need I say anymore! It's our very own Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiing Booooooooooooowerrrrrrrrrrr!"_

The crowd went wild as Bowser threw his arms out and roared, blowing forth a stream of fire effortlessly. Junior danced around as I rolled my eyes at his antics; he was really hamming it up.

_"King Bowser!" _

"_King Bowser!"_

Moments later the lights to the stadium flared back on and the rest of the team was visible. Bowser looked at me and grinned. He started stomping his way over.

His mouth was set in a hellish grin and his arms and claws were held open; as if he was going to catch something or some_one_. I laughed nervously, "B-Bowser? What is it? No...don't look at me that way…STAY BACK!"

"Here kitty, kitty kitty," he was laughing, eyes flashing.

_"And now the challengers from the Mushroom kingdom have arrived, Koopettes and Koopas don't boo them too loudly_," the announcer chuckled, "_Co-captains Luigi, Peach, and the captain we all hate to love, Mario!"_

_What! Who was I playing against!? _I froze as the red-clad opponents crossed onto the field. Amidst their team I spotted Toad, Birdo, and Toadette. These were all my friends I was going to be playing against. In the usual league I've played against them before and soundly thrashed the hell out of them but that's not the problem. The problem is I'm now playing for _Bowser_, the fiend we all hate or at least who I'm supposed to hate.

He's the same guy who's ruined all of our parties, some of our sports tournaments, kidnapped Peach and started fights out of the wazoo with Mario and Lulu. None of my friends are going to be cool with Bowser. And since I run in all of their circles, then I shouldn't like him either.

Oh Stars, things were going to become very interesting soon…

_"The first co-captain is the lean, green not so mean machine, Luuuuuigiiiiii!"_

A loud roar of furious boos flooded the stadium. Luigi, who had originally been smiling at waving at the crowd, now stared back in stupor.

"_And the second co-captain is the beautiful and dainty ruler of the Mushroom kingdom, Princess Peeeeeeeach!"_

Then the spotlight fell upon my beauteous cousin. The boos softened considerably as Peach smiled prettily, waving and blowing kisses to the crowd. Curious as to what Bowser was thinking, I glanced over at him to gauge his reaction. He had his hands on his hips and stared at Peach with an incomprehensible expression. He must have felt my stare because he turned to look at me.

I nudged closer to him and whispered, "Your dream girl's lookin' good isn't she?"

Confused, Bowser frowned. Then a smug grin ripped across his face, "Damn, I'd have to say she's lookin' _very _good."

I laughed, shaking my head, "Well that's Peachy. I wouldn't be surprised if she could probably look good during child birth."

Bowser snorted in revolt as I laughed, "Ugh, let's never _ever_ go there again, Flower. It puts weird images into my head."

I snorted, "And calling me 'long legs' doesn't?!"

He grinned, "Oh no, those put hot images into my head."

Laughing, I rolled my eyes, "Oh whatever."

_"Oh! Oh! And now Koopettes and Koopas, it's time to meet the captain of the other team! He's the red wonder! The red menace! The Italian stallion! He's the pulse of the opposing team! It's Marioooooooooooooo!"_

Just as the cheers for Bowser were defeating, the boos for Mario were just as loud, perhaps only in the opposite end of the spectrum. Mario continued his warm-up stretches acting as if he hadn't even heard the crowd. Game-face on, he continued rolling his ankle.

"Mario you _suck!_"

"Go back to draining pipes!"

"I clogged up a toilet I want you to clean!"

"King Bowser owns you!"

"'It's a me Mario'! _LAAAME_!"

"Will the captains come up for the coin toss?" the troopa referee clucked.

Bowser stomped over towards midfield. And of course the sight of Bowser and Mario encroaching midfield was televised on the large jumbo screen. I watched, excited to catch sight of the two titans clashing. The second they were near the referee, Bowser's expression changed as he sneered down at Mario hatefully.

Mario glared back and easily reciprocated all of Bowser's hostility. The referee called the captains to enforce a hard, well-played game. I was content to watch the proceedings until I felt someone tap my shoulder. With a raised eyebrow I spun around, "...Hmm?"

It was Luigi and Peach. Standing beside them was Toadette who was squinting at me. My friends were decked in bright red uniforms and I felt left out. It felt like I was playing on the wrong side as if I was on the bad guy's team. Mario, Luigi, Peach, Toadette, Yoshi, Toad; all my friends I loved and known for life were all on the other team, the team I should have been on.

I should be wearing an engine-red uniform and playing as one of their midfielders. Then a thought crossed my mind; Peach and I both played midfielder and the SuperStriker league only allowed one midfielder on the field. If I was on the Mushroom Kingdom Magic my instinct tells me Peach would have my precious position and I'd be made to play another position.

Why?

Because within our circle of mutual friends, Peach always got what she wanted. Maybe it was a good thing I played for the Darkland Dragons after all. I blinked, defogging my thoughts when Lulu spoke. Clearwater blues bright and concerned, he looked at me, "Uh Missy are you all right?"

"Uh yeah…?"

'Missy?' Since when did Lulu ever call me Missy? Better yet what made him think it was ever okay to call me by a stupid fluffy nickname like 'Missy!?'

"If Bowser's holding you against your will," Peach spoke, voice soft and eyes warm, "We promise we'll help you."

I blinked, looking at both of them stupidly. Did they not recognize me!? Geesh! I know I had a makeover but I don't look _that _different! My hair was straighter and my facial features were more defined from waxing but geesh! I'm still the same tomboyish, clumsy princess.

"Guys," I spoke slowly, "It's me…"

Luigi looked confused as Peach blinked. The green plumber scratched his head as Peach narrowed her eyes, studying me with a critical gaze.

" 'Me?'" Luigi said to himself softly, "Me who?"

A spark of recognition shone in Toadette's eyes as she smiled. With the puzzlement from both Peach and Lulu, she started to giggle and I winked at her.

"You look amazing," Toadette beamed; ha, I knew she would recognize me.

Peach suddenly stepped back and gasped dramatically, "_D-Daisy?_!"

I grinned and raised a hand in greeting, "Heya!"

Luigi's jaw dropped as Peach continued to speak, "Oh my Stars! You look _drop dead_!"

"Haha…thanks couz..."

Well what else could I say to that? Peach was taking in my appearance gleefully, "My goodness you look like a _girl_! You must tell me where you went to get such an amazing makeover!"

I frowned;_ I looked like a girl!_? So like what did I look like before! A boy? A boy with shoulder-length hair in a yellow dress?!

"How superb!" She squealed, "Maybe your stylist can fit me into their busy schedule too?"

"Uh…?" Yet again I stood there, not knowing what to say as Peach continued to touch my hair and coo happily over my facial features.

"You look wonderful Daisy," Toadette chirruped happily, "Softer and more feminine."

I blushed at Toadette's praise, "Aw, thanks T!"

Luigi snapped out of whatever trance he was in. He had been staring with a blush but now his face was pale, "Daisy…what are you-a doing on Bowser's team-a?"

"Are you okay? Has he kidnapped you?" Toadette frowned cutely, "We can help you…"

Peach, who had been running her hands through my hair adoringly looked up, "Dai, what _are_ you doing playing on his team?! Did he abduct _you_?"

Both Luigi and Peach stared at each other before they burst out laughing. What was so funny?

I frowned, "Hey, what's so funny about him kidnapping me?!"

"Well I suppose it's not funny," Peach continued to giggle, "But why would he kidnap _you_?"

"It is a little-a strange Daisy," as Peach continued to giggle, Luigi grinned, "Why-a would Bowser-a kidnap you over-a Miss Peach?"

_Ouch._

Wide-eyed, I stared in stupor. _Why would Bowser kidnap me over Peach_? Is that what he really just said? My nostrils flared as my blood broiled; so what! Was I not special or worth kidnapping?! That's the message my _cousin_ and my _friend_ were saying.

Or was it ludicrous someone would choose me over the illustrious, gorgeous Princess Peach? As they continued their laughter, I shook with ill-suppressed ire; this was how it was.

Even amongst my closest friends and kin, it was widely acknowledged how I was always seen as the bronze to Peach's winning gold, the background to her lead. It was perfectly okay to point out that compared to my cousin's bright, stunning palette of color, I was monochrome.

_Was this how it was always going to be?_ Once upon a time I was okay with being relegated to being Peach's shadow, but now I just couldn't accept it anymore. Maybe my new strength came from my new make-over or maybe I just found a new appreciation for who I was.

Maybe my friendship with Bowser kindled a new resolve I never had before, but whatever the reason; I was going to stop this. I jerked out of Peach's grasp, distancing myself from them.

I ignored the imploring, look of betrayal on her face, "Daisy...?"

"Yeah? Well maybe you think I'm not _worth_ kidnapping, but when did I ever care of your opinion!? " I spat.

Luigi raised both eyebrows in surprise as Peach's visage contorted into horror. Even Toadette seemed slightly surprised at my outburst.

"Daisy…" Peach pouted her pink lips sadly, "We didn't mean to offend! We just meant—"

I raised a stiff hand, "Yeah whatever, just save it. Prepare to _lose._"

I turned away, walking back to midfield seeing red. With my infamous un-princessly temper flaring to life; I ignored their calls. I barely noticed when Bowser was beside me.

"What's wrong Flower? Did something just happen back there with Princess Foo-foo and Green Geek face?"

If I hadn't been so mad I would have laughed; their nicknames are funny, "Wrong? Who says anything's wrong! Ugh, let's just wipe the floor with these Shroomies."

Bowser chuckled, "Now you're speaking my language. Let's decimate those goody-goodies."

He placed a hand on my shoulder, pulling me to a halt. I was about to snap when he slowly eased his large claws onto my arms, making sure to keep his sharp talons from tearing into my skin.

He must have bent closer to my face because I could feel the soft traces of his breath as he whispered into my ear, "This is your chance to get 'em back for all that crap you had to put up with. I know how they hurt you, I can see it in the way your eyes are flashing."

I'm sure surprise must have stolen my features at his admission, "I…"

"Now then," he was smirking, "come on and join me at midfield so we can get your revenge."

"Revenge?" I replied back just as softly.

"Revenge." while he purred these words, there was an audible, dangerous growl within the statement.

He pulled away and shot a quick wink. I gave him a soft smile as we approached half field together. I glared, stewing over his words. This was my chance to get them back for all those lousy comparisons to Peach.

I grinned; oh I'll show them how much of a screw up I am. I was a tomboy and athletic by nature. This game had nothing to do with being pretty or having wonderful features. The toughest, most athletic would win here. This was _my_ universe to shine in.

Kick off; the area where the opposing forces met. On one side stood the valiant heroes of the Mushroom Magic. Emblazoned in a brave shade of red, they all stood, game-faces on and eyes blazing.

And then there was our side; swathed in black like an ominous shadow. Our team was nothing but bloodthirsty, feral monsters. We would do anything, fall to the lowest lows and ride the highest highs to achieve our victory.

I stood beside Bowser, the barbaric leader of the wild Dragons. He was focused, glaring down Mario. Across from us were the Mario brothers. Luigi stared beseechingly as I ignored him deftly.

I looked at big brother who must have sensed someone else staring. The heroic plumber stopped his hate affair with Bowser and finally glanced at me. His blank stare made me believe he didn't recognize me; huh, maybe this make-over thing really did make me look like a new girl. Luigi leaned over and whispered something into his brother's ear.

Mario looked at Luigi, startled before he looked back at me. I smirked and halfheartedly waved. A floating lakitu referee appeared, hovering over us with a whistle in mouth and a timer in hand. He looked between the four of us.

The ball rested under Bowser's foot; it was moments before the game was to begin. I looked at the large jumbo screen and there we were, all four of us captured at midfield. My nerves started to bubble and knot up my stomach. Bowser gave another quick wink.

"You ready to kill it, Flower?" Bowser grinned hellishly.

"Yeah I am!"

"Then put it there partner," Bowser held out a massive fist and with a smile I knocked my fist into his to complete the fist-pound.

Moments later, smiles were wiped away and senses were on red alert; it was game time. I had Bowser, Junior and my team behind me and with their faith in me, I would shine. I won't let them down. Though it was unspoken, there was much riding on this game. As with every showdown where Mario faced Bowser, honor and respect was paramount.

And I would do everything in my power to help Bowser win.

The whistle was blown and the moment Bowser passed the ball to me, time should have slowed to a crawl.

And within that frozen moment, Mario would have just started to dart forward to meet Bowser with Luigi on his heels. The ball wouldn't have reached my person yet, as Bowser would have moved to face off against Mario in an epic head to head.

Mario and Bowser's faces would have been trapped in fierce sneers and the moment they physically collided, hitting each other with all the strength in their bodies, time would have returned to its normal tempo.

With a roar I darted forward, forcing Luigi out of my path with a hard shove. My raging anger hazed my perception and senses; I didn't see Luigi as my friend but as an obstacle to overcome. I was determined to show these friends of mine I wasn't worthless.

A red uniform came rushing at me, another obstacle and I juked to the other side to keep the ball. An exuberant flare of cheer rose from the crowd. Another red shirt appeared on my left and with a roar I smashed into him headstrong with all the force I could muster.

A second cheer rose, this one louder than before. The sizzle of the electric fence exploded to life as I hopped over the fallen player, continuing my mad trek to their goal. A defender rushed forward and with a burst of clarity I recognized Peach.

"Daisy! I'm sorry!"

"Shove it!"

"Please listen!"

"Get out of my way!"

Her blue eyes were eerily dark, "Fine!"

The next thing I knew Peach rammed into my unarmored stomach, knocking the breath from my body. It was a blow strong enough to make me stagger, but it wasn't effective enough to get me to lose the ball.

Peach may have had the best shot in the league but her strength was lacking terribly. She drove into me a second time, wrenching her elbow into my unprotected middle.

My ire blazed hotter, more wildly and I retaliated with all of my strength. With a guttural roar, I slammed into her and Peach flew, hitting the fence with a vicious jerk. The sizzling of the electric fence and her girlish shrieks of pain faded. The goal came into view like a glowing beacon; I activated my armor for a megastrike; the most powerful shot a captain had in the game. My charged armor glowed red like fire; I was ready to use my super strike.

The grass near my feet began to freeze and crystallize into frosty diamonds as my breath came out in cool puffs.

"MEGA STRIKE!" I roared, ice and crystal beginning to coat my arms and legs.

I raised my fist in the air and began to take off. Before I levitated more than two feet off the ground, something slammed into me _hard_ with a vicious blow, clearing me across the field. A deafening, 'Oooh!' reverberated through the crowd.

I rolled across the field collecting rug-burn and colorful bruises. I stopped inches away from the high-voltage fence; my nose was centimeters away from touching the hot, crackling electrical fence. The jarring blow doused my anger into clear consciousness.

I groaned, body protesting viciously. A shadow loomed overhead and when I looked up, it was Mario. Eyes dark, he glared coldly; ah, I suppose he was the one who cleaned my clock. No one else on his team was really strong enough to put that kind of hurt on someone.

Although his hit was to stop my shot at goal, I'm pretty sure the major motivation was because of how brutally I trounced his darling Peach. Well it wasn't like she didn't try to hit me! In fact she hit me_ first_. I only nailed her because I'm stronger and tougher than she is.

Mario went over to kneel beside a fallen teammate. My stomach dropped; _Peach?_

"_Oooooooooh! Oh! What a start to an already electric game_!" The announcer cried over the noises of the crowd, "_Gosh who spit in her koopa salad! In a bout of rage the Foreign flower has all but destroyed the defense of the Mushroom Magics single-handedly!"_

Wobbling, I rose to my feet as all the red-shirts on the field gathered around Peach. The sight of her burns made my stomach churn uneasily.

_" Perhaps blood really isn't thicker than water! Daisy finished her rampage by introducing her cousin into the electric fence! Just when we thought we'd see a beautiful super strike so early in the game, Team Captain Mario put an impressive hit on our flower as a last resort. Welcome to the team Princess Daisy!"_

I walked over to the circle of red jerseys. The opposing team peered my way and despite the begrudging hostilities, a path was cleared for me to see my cousin.

Nearest to Peach were Mario and Toad. The famed hero took a knee beside her, running a hand through her hair as Toad dabbed a handkerchief at her face. I stopped a few paces from them.

"Everything's okay Peach," Toad wiped dirt smudges from her face.

"Be strong Princess-a," Lulu said softly, "The medic-a will be here soon."

"_Mi Bella_," Mario spoke softly, his eyes light with a glow I had never seen before, "Stay strong _Bella_, you-a know it bothers me-a to see you cry."

"O-okay, I'll s-stop c-crying then," Peach sniffled, "I'm s-sorry if I worried you Mari."

There was something in his eyes, a warmth I had never seen before. His eyes were usually bright like the ocean but the overt adoration as he tended to Peach was astounding. He gazed upon her as if she were the only thing that mattered.

_My Stars. He was completely in love with her. Utterly head over heels for her..._

Mario chuckled softly, "It's-a fine _Miel_. And don't apologize! I'm fine as long as you are-a."

"Yeah, stop crying Peach," Toad joked, "You're going to ruin your perfect make-up!"

A chorus of chuckles traveled through the team as a watery smile slipped onto Peach's face. The atmosphere froze when I stepped beside Peach. Smiles disappeared as laughter faded into silence. Toad and Yoshi gave austere stares as Mario glared, his anger almost tangible.

Luigi wanted to wave or acknowledge my presence but he stood still, knowing any friendly gesture would out him with his team.

"Peach…" I whispered softly, guilt swelling up into a tangible knot in my throat.

I squatted beside my cousin who sobbed terribly. Her legs and exposed abdomen were burned badly, covered in scorched flesh and purpling skin. Her wound was a lot worse than I thought. I must have really pushed her into the fence hard...

"S-Sorry Daisy," she spoke softly, breathing labored, "I didn't mean t-to make you feel bad. You are worth something."

My breath caught in my chest; this wasn't about soccer.

"It's okay," I touched her silken hair, smiling, "I'm sorry too…I didn't think I hit you that hard."

Her cherry-pink lips curled into a small smile, "Its okay. I-It doesn't hurt…t-that bad."

The medic toad stopped beside her, gauging the severity of her wounds. The second the medic touched a wound, Peach broke into a sob, clenching Mario's hand for support. The medic ordered her off the field and out for the game. Luigi wrapped an arm around Peach and with his help the medic toad hauled her off.

The crowd clapped altruistically as she left the field. Ever the magnanimous woman, Peach smiled and waved to the crowd, the cheers growing at her show of spirit. Mario spun to face me, blue eyes smoldering. I took a step back, appalled I'd ever receive such a look from him.

"Was that necessary?" Toad asked in a low voice, eyes dark, "Everyone knows it's not a fair contest between you and her."

"What?" I replied, frowning.

"She didn't even hit you hard," another team member replied, "Besides, why are you even playing with the Darklanders anyways? You should be playing with us."

A low murmur of disapproval rose and I found myself in the middle of something. Their team circled around, shooting glares and disapproving looks my way.

"You've changed," one girl said, shaking her head with pity, "New hair, new team, new attitude; the old Daisy never would have hurt her cousin."

"It's those Darklanders influencing her…"

Yoshi chirruped something in an incomprehensible garble. His voice was light and airy, making me think it wasn't a scolding. He waved his arms around, shaking his head at his teammates; was he trying to help? Trying to tell them to ease them up?

"I-I didn't mean to hit her…Well okay I _did_ but not into the electric fence 'cause it hurts like hell!"

"So you want to play-a rough?" although he spoke softly, Mario's eyes belied his true anger, "Then game on-a Daisy."

I rose to my feet and frowned; I hit her back as a defensive maneuver. _But no one cares. All they care about is Peach being hurt._ My temper started to boil over; it seemed like even my closest friends were always on her side.

In fact I bet if the roles had been reversed and she decked me into the electrical fence, they would have congratulated and high-fived her.

"Hey, she hit me _first_," I snarled, "I guess it's _always_ okay if Peach steps over me but the second I fight back it's not fair!"

Still glaring, Mario shook his head, "What are you even-a talking about!?"

"You know what I mean! You guys are just—"

"Are you giving _my_ player trouble Mario?"

Bowser clambered towards us with a wicked sneer and glowing eyes. A collective gasp rose from the Mushroom Kingdom Magic and they hurriedly backed away at Bowser's approach. Only Mario and I stood our ground as the king came.

Bowser stood next to me as he sneered down at his foe, "Last time I checked, body checks are _legal_ in this game. If Princess powder puff ain't woman enough to take a good hit, then maybe she shouldn't be playin' this game!"

Did he take up for me? When was the last time anybody has ever done that? Why would Bowser speak that way about the woman he was crazily infatuated with?

After playing games against the toughest of the tough like Wario and DK, I would always have to take an ice bath for all my injuries suffered. But never once did I cry. That would be the worst.

I might lose or completely get my ass kicked by someone bigger and stronger, but they would never get the satisfaction of making me cry _like a girl_. When I got knocked around by guys thrice my height and size, no one seemed concerned but when I hit Peach—who I'm the same size relatively—everyone stopped the functioning world to see if she's okay.

Mario frowned, "She-a didn't have to hit her that hard. They're cousins!"

Bowser chuckled darkly as his eyes narrowed, "Oh _please_, I've seen you hit Luigi _twice_ as hard when you play against him. In fact that shot you just put on Princess Daisy registered at a good seven on my scale."

Mario glared, shaking his head, "Whatever-a. Just for Peach we're gonna win this one."

He shot a heated glare my way before he went. With an ominous look from Bowser, the Mushroom Magic rushed after their captain.

"Yeah good luck with that short stack," Bowser huffed.

The second Mario was out of hearing range, Bowser turned to me with a large grin, "_Hot_ _damn _Flower. That was one of the _nastiest_ runs I've _ever_ seen."

I blushed as he continued, " First you knock over Luigi like a bowling pin—Oh hell, I almost _died_ of laughter—then you knocked uh who was that shroomy thing? Toad?"

I slapped a hand to my head; oh holy Star Haven, I decked _Toad!_? Toad, the cute little Mushroom who loves to drink tea, cookies and milk before bedtime?

" Yeah you sent Toad flying," Bowser chuckled, "But the coup de grace was the Peach fiasco. For a second I thought she had you but then _BOOM!_ You send her into the fence. Woulda been sweet though if you had finished with a Super strike."

"S…So you didn't think I was 'cruel' to Peach?"

He looked at me with shock, "What?! Hell no! Hits, smacks, shoves, blood and bruises are all a part of the game, baby. If you don't have the hide for it, then you oughta catch the quickest ride to getthehellouttahereville."

I bust out laughing, "Now that one was stupid."

Bowser's mischievous expression melded into a smoldering look, "Heh I won't lie, seeing you furious like that was _hot_."

I flushed and punched him in the arm, "_Bowser_!?"

He grinned darkly, arching an eyebrow, "Yeah? I called you hot, so what are you going to do about it now Sugar cleats?"

I blushed, growling angrily as I threw a second punch but something tells me he was expecting that. He laughed far too gleefully, catching my attack effortlessly as he tugged me closer.

"Bowser!? Let me go!"

"Oh yeah baby, are you starting to get mad again?"

"I am going to chop your head off!"

"Ooh, talking dirty are we? It's a good thing I like it rough."

By now I was laughing, "_Bowser_!"

"_Ladies and koopas, the game will resume now. Captain Mario was the last to have touched the ball, so the ball is in the hand of the Home team_."

As Junior rushed past to retrieve the ball, he grinned at me, "Hi Mama! Bye Mama! Awesome run by the way."

I laughed, "Thanks Junior."

Junior stood at attention waiting to take the free kick and with the ref's signal he charged the ball. Just before he went for the punt, he sent a quick wink at me. He faked like he was going to take a shot but passed the ball to the side. The ball rolled in front of me and there was Mario, rushing furiously.

_"Oh oh! A fake by the Prince as he passes it to Princess Daisy!"_

_Want the Ball Marmar?_

I glared, ready to meet his challenge and from the corner of my eye I saw a spark of black appear. I looked to my left and saw Bowser managed to get passed a defender and was glaringly wide open.

_Then come and get it._

Yoshi must have noticed and left his mark to charge straight for Bowser's position. That meant I had seconds at most to get my play done. I continued to charge straight at Mario and the second we made contact, I performed a deke and passed the ball to Bowser.

Mario performed a vicious slide-tackle that could have doubled as a tackle. When I hit the floor there was a loud _pop, _my knee crunching against the ground as pain flamed terrifically. I bit out a sharp Sarasalandian swear as I wreathed in pain, clutching my throbbing knee. A long, inky shadow fell over me and though teary-eyed and biting my lip to staunch the pain, I peered up at Mario. His eyes were cut thinner than a razor blade, "That was for-a Peach."

"You're a jerk…!" I managed to hiss, "Ugh…"

I held my knee, gritting my teeth; it felt like someone tried to separate my joints with a hot knife. I rolled over, continuing my stream of curses as my knee throbbed. I tried to stand to my feet but stumbled pathetically, hobbling and balancing in a half-crouch on my good leg. Every movement I made sent a white-hot lance of misery through my knee.

" _The ball goes to the King…He winds up and…"_

The king's eyes blazed with hellish concentration as the ball exploded off of his foot. A thunderous boom rattled the floor of the stadium, sounding like a rocket taking flight. Holy Stars is Bowser strong.

All sound in the Bowser Stadium suddenly fell silent in a sweeping gale, fans rising to their feet and all heads followed the shot. Dragons watched, eyes glittering with hope as horror stole the Magic's faces...

The ball soared towards the upper right corner of the goal, and with all the liquid relaxes of a puma, the keeper pounced, gloves stretching towards the ball.

But the shot was too well-placed and we were rewarded with the exhilarating moment when the ball soared passed the keeper's outstretched hands and then there was nothing but the glorious swish of net.

_"GOOOOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL_!" A deafening roar rose from the fans, the bleachers in the stadium shook, "THE FIRST GOAL OF THE GAME IS BY KING BOWSAH! _What a shot! Wow, what a shot! The assist from Princess Daisy was pretty sweet too!"_

The crowd launched into a victory song, a melody I could barely distinguish as their own anthem for Bowser. Each captain's fans had created a song for their respective captains. Every time a team scored a goal, this song would be started and although I don't know my own victory song by heart, I do know some of the lyrics mention, 'blossoming fire flowers in a sea of fire' and 'a fabulous girl with sparkling diamond eyes'.

As the Koopa King's victory song carried loudly through the ecstatic crowd, I held onto my burning knee. Face screwed up, I tried to hold back from swearing. Damn I should have shot the ball. I should have known Mario would get me back. Ugh, I was hoping he wouldn't lose his temper and go out of his way to attempt _murder_.

"Hey _cutie pie_," the sheer arrogance in Bowser's voice was comically obtuse. He yanked me from the floor as I tried to hobble alongside of him, "Did you see that godly shot by yours truly?"

He wrapped his arm around me as I grimaced from the pain, "Ugh…"

He ran a free hand through his red mane arrogantly, "Heh you know, when _your_ very own stud muffin walked past the crowd, a couple of ladies _swooned_, aren't you jealous? You know some of them were _kinda _cute too…"

"Bowser…" I grimaced, "My knee…my leg is…"

"Hell yes!" he beamed hellishly, "Those bronze shapely things make me wanna _purr_."

"Ugh…" My head hung as I felt the pain sapping the strength from me. I had stopped limping and only Bowser dragged my entire weight now.

"What? Where's your usual blush and indignant response? I just complimented you! Something's not right here. You playin' hard to get? Cause it only makes me—"

He finally looked at me as the snide smirk wiped off his face. I thought he looked pale, "Daisy? Princess? Hey are you okay?"

He slowed down until he stopped moving altogether. His brows scrunched together in worry as his grip tightened around me. His claws were holding my armored shoulders and thank the Stars for the armor; his sharp talons would have probably torn through my flesh easily.

"Leg…my leg," I wheezed, "Mario…slide-tackled me."

Bowser's concern quickly shifted into rage. As he spoke, the back of his throat glowed with the promise of fire, "That pipe-licking son of a bitch! I knew I should have decked his ass when I had the chance. Oh I'm going to _pound _him."

"Bowser just get some ice already," I hissed.

"O-Okay hold on Flower," he picked me up and ran across the field.

Each heavy step he took jarred my knee painfully as he charged across the field. I bit my lip trying to focus on anything besides the terrible pain. The faces of our fellow teammates appeared in my peripherals, curious as to what had their king in such a rush.

Bowser roared, "MEDIC!"

Our team of black-clad baddies gathered around. For 'evil', 'scary' creatures that all Darklanders are rumored to be, they all looked concerned and empathetic.

"You took a pretty good shot, Desert girl," A fire bro said.

"I saw the whole thing," A hammer bro piped up, "Mari-ho hit her with a pretty cheap shot."

"I was impressed, that looked like something _we_ would do_."_

_"_Ole plumbsy ain't all that clean cut like everyone thinks."

"Mama!" Junior cried out as he pushed himself to the front of the crowd.

I looked up at the jumbo-tron screen and watched the replay of Mario taking me out. I squinted in disdain; so not _only_ was my knee swollen and blazing with pain, but on a gigantic television, everyone was watching me get my_ ass kicked_ over and over again in _replays_ and also in _slow motion_.

Today was just _not _my day.

With a groan I covered my face. Bowser raised an eyebrow then looked up at the jumbo-tron. In utter slow motion it showed Mario sliding into me. And the camera zoomed in on my surprised face as I fell, waving my arms like an idiot. My humiliation wasn't over yet, haha oh no.

'Cause when I hit the ground, my face contorted up hideously as I shouted a very strong Sarasalandian curse—which was now _very_ easy to read in slow motion.

I was mortified.

Bowser looked at me and was completely...

Laughing his _ass off_.

With a growl, I smacked and punched his arm as his rancorous laughter only grew louder, "S-Shut up! Just shut up okay?! It's not even funny!"

"Don't worry now Flower," he set me on the bench next to a medikoopa in a white smock, "just you rest easy. We'll take the ass-kicking from here. You've proven yourself as a sick soccer player already."

The medikoopa applied ice to my knee and I smiled up at Bowser. His red brows were scrunched together and his arms were crossed. Wait, was he tapping his foot anxiously?

Why he was worried!

"Hey, I'm fine. You guys just go and get them for me, okay?"

Bowser snorted, "I'm not worried! I just…well…you look hurt! And no one takes out a Dragon and get away with it scott free. We will kick ass for you."

"I know you guys will."

I smiled at him softer than usual; despite what Bowser said, it was obvious that he was concerned about me. Actions spoke far louder than words as he had dragged me halfway across the field to make sure I was okay.

"Thanks Bowser," I cooed softly.

There must have been something with the look I gave because moments later Bowser's expression changed. His eyes grew wide and a smear of blush flooded his face, "Uh…"

His red eyes darted away quickly, "W-Well yeah, so you better get better if you know what's good for you then Flower."

I laughed, "I will. Now shoo, I can handle things from here."

"Heh, so I guess you can watch the king of studs in action," he grinned, "Maybe even be my pretty little cheerleader. Boy, I wish we had some kinda _really skimpy_, slutty cheerleader outfit for you to wear around here…"

I flushed, growling, "I am _not _a cheerleader kind of girl. I should be on the field next to you…."

"But you're not, now take it easy Fireflower and don't swoon _too_ hard at my sexy soccer skills."

Bowser placed a large hand on my good knee. He glared at the medikoopa, "You take good care of her you hear me? If I hear for one second that the Sarasaland princess is uncomfortable you're going to deal with me, got that?"

The poor medikoopa nodded his head, "Y-Y-Yes your lordship!"

"Good," he growled gruffly finally looking at me.

He half-grinned, content to stare for a few seconds more. Um okay his hand was _still_ on my knee and because of how massive his hand was, it was on my thigh. With a deep chuckle his claws plucked flirtatiously at the garner on my leg, snapping it against my thigh.

Just before I could tear into him, Bowser grinned one last time then moved back to the field. As Bowser jogged away he called his team into a huddle. I couldn't hear what he was saying but I could see the gesticulations towards the opposing team.

And there were some pretty violent gestures. Maybe if I turn my head, I could pretend I didn't see him lopping the heads off of his fingers, who I guess were supposed to represent the other team.

When our team broke from the huddle they looked murderous; wow Bowser _really_ fired them up! Even Junior looked like he wanted blood. Back at half field Mario passed the ball to Luigi who spun around and passed the ball back to Toad. Just as he came under pressure from a Koopa, Toad passed to a wide-open Toadette.

Toadette spun the ball gracefully, dribbling down the field. As Toadette trounced into the Darklandian half of the field, Junior rushed forward, growling and hissing as he pursued his new mark. When she dribbled towards the Koopa prince, something mighty interesting happened.

Junior snarled, squaring up to hit her but the second Toadette locked stares, all of Junior's previous animosity Koopaling froze, eyes round as Toadette halted.

Another Dragon who didn't share the same qualms about playing rough, rushed passed Junior and with unapologetic asperity slammed into Toadette with a well-placed shoulder check. It was brutal enough that even the crowd released a low, rumbling 'oooh' through the stadium. I winced when Toadette's armored arms and legs scratched nosily against the floor.

The Darklandian hammer bro collected ball and shot a malicious grin, he shot back, "Eat dirt Shroomie."

"H-Hey!" Junior called out, to his own player, "You didn't have to hit her so hard! Jerk!"

The ball was back in Bowser's possession as he led a furious assault against the Mushroom Magic. The Koopa King barreled down field, shoving and knocking opposing players aside. Junior turned to Toadette and stopped near the fallen toadstool, kindly helping Toadette to her feet.

I grinned; hmm what was _this_?

"Are you okay girlie?" Junior asked, "You took a hard shove."

"Y-yeah I'm fine," she looked up at him and smiled, "Thank you for helping me up. I'm most grateful."

"Heh no problem." Junior looked at her and grinned in the same mischievous manner as his father, "I'd stop by any day to help out someone as cute as you~!"

"C-C-Cute!?" Toadette blushed charmingly, cheeks blistering pink, "Why…I suppose I think you're cute too."

Junior's grin grew larger as he glowed red, "Teeheehee! _Aw shucks_! I'm Bowser Junior by the way and you are…?"

At Junior's obvious, blunt interest, she smiled up at him shyly, "I'm Toadette. Nice to meet you Bowser Junior."

Junior had moved in so close to her that they were barely inches apart. A mischievous grin wrought with glittering fangs met her, "Toadette huh? Friends call me Junior," he winked at her, "I'd like it if you did too."

The crowd rose to their feet as the jumbo screen suddenly focused on Bowser. He was in enemy territory and skillfully dodged Birdo's oncoming slide-tackle with surprising speed. After performing an impressive deke Bowser drew back, gathering power for his shot on goal.

The crowd was chanting a loud, "KING! KING! KING! KING! KING!"

It all happened in a matter of seconds but I saw it all: the drawn back leg, the fierce glow of concentration blazing on Bowser face and then there was the loud bang of his foot meeting the ball. The ball exploded and soared like a missile, kissing the back of the net.

We got a goal! Yeah! Yahoo! I hobbled on one foot, cheering and screaming as the crowd roared frantically. Bowser strutted and as he looked around the crowd he waved to his fans arrogantly.

Then his eyes fell upon me. That seemed to spike his testosterone levels as his wild grin grew and with a roar he flexed, inciting another riot of cheers from the crowd. I laughed, continuing to bumble around on my good foot.

_"Ladies and Koopas that was goal two for Kiiiiiiiiiiiiing Bowwwwwsaaaaaaah!"_

The rest of the game proceeded in the same manner. It seemed that after Peach's injury the team morale never properly recovered. By half time the score was 5-0 with Bowser on his way to a second hat trick.

Halftime arrived far than expected as we sat in the locker room. Bowser gave a questionably bloodthirsty speech: it was 'kill them' this and 'rip their heads off' that. And yet while he was running through ruthless strategies and playbooks he was magnanimous enough to have a beauty staff on hand to spoil me.

I received massages, ice-water served in champagne bottles and a stylist freshened up my hair style and dabbed on a flattering magenta lipgloss.

I feared that the sudden addition of lipgloss was distracting Bowser. The game's second half was going to start but Bowser was busy thinking of other thing. In fact he should have been on the field right now, but he was over near the sidelines, pestering me.

"No kiss? Not even a tiny one? How are we going to win without a good luck kiss?" he purred.

I was glowing neon red and flustered, "Will you get your ass back on that field!? If you don't hurry up the game will start and the Dragons will be a man down!"

Though we were winning, Bowser told the team not to let up in revenge for the dirty slide-tackle I suffered. In the second half the Mushroom Magic scored a goal. It was solely through Mario's personal determination that such a thing happened; he skillfully maneuvered through three defenders to land a perfect far-post goal.

Mario's unexpected goal seemed to fuel Bowser's rage. Bowser always looked pissed when he played soccer but this time he was visibly shaking. The next time Bowser was near half field, his Super Striker armor burned red-hot, smoldering with smoke and fire. The devilish red-glow of his armor and his building fury fit his nickname to a tee: hell in a shell.

The crowd roared, recognizing their king's activation of his signature kick. His armor shone like an ominous scarlet corona and then his Super Striker power was activated.

"Super Strike," he growled ominously and with the summon, his armor glowed even brighter.

"_Oh my! Ladies and Koopas just when we thought this game couldn't become more thrilling, I think we're about to see Lord Koopa's hellish Super Striiiiiiiiike!"_

In an explosion of fire and smoke, Bowser shot into the sky like a missile. I watched, completely fascinated as the Super Strike gave him an even more demonic appearance. His eyes were completely red and his fangs and shell spikes elongated to ridiculous lengths. In the midst of all the smoke and flames, I saw Bowser spinning in mid-air.

Eyes narrowed he threw the ball at the goal in an arch of raining fire. I felt sorry for the keeper as the balls rained in the net like a furious comet storm.

_"OH! Three goals for KING KOOPA! Did you see his Super Strike! The ferociousness, the concentration! The power!"_

The benched teammates and I were on our feet high-fiving and prancing around after the sweet goals. The referee blew the whistle three times and we knew it was game. The crowd went wild, waving banners with the team mascot.

_"The Winners! The Darklandian Draaaaaagoooooons!"_

In the air of victory our team roared with cheer. I hopped around, now using crutches to balance myself as I danced along side of the medikoopa. Bowser threw his head back in sinister laughter and blew a fountain of bluish fire from his maw. The Mushroom Kingdom Magic were downtrodden, disappointed with the loss.

Yoshi and Toad both hugged a teary-eyed Toadette, as Luigi pulled his hat over his face. Birdo hugged Yoshi as Mario himself looked beyond livid. While the Mushroom Kingdom Magic were sad with the loss, the crowd of the Bowser stadium were electric. Yet again they were singing Bowser's victory motto.

Koopas in the crowd even held up posters and plushies of Bowser as they roared happily. I was horrified at how _cute_ the little Bowser plushies were!

Koopettes sobbed happily as Bowser walked passed them. They reached out for him desperately, touching his shoulders and grabbing for his large biceps. Bowser laughed, sending several sly, pleased glances at his clinging fans who purred and growled their affections for him.

"King Bowser look at me!"

"Omistars, it's King Bowser!"

"King Bowser, I want to have your Koopaling!"

I sat on the bench as I watched the players wish each other good game. This was the sportsmanship element of the game where each team high-fived the other opponents. I tried not to laugh at Junior who had an amused sneer on his face.

As Junior walked passed, he was cackling wickedly all but punching the opposing team. However when he got to Toadette, his cheeks glowed pink and carefully shook her hand. When Junior's lingering hold on her hand held up the line, Toadette flushed a pretty shade of pink.

Luigi looked nervous as he shook hands with Bowser and I nearly laughed when Bowser and Mario got to each other. Bowser grinned appallingly as he shook Mario's hand, and Mario looked like he wanted to spit fire. I bet their handshake grip was probably super tight! Haha!

With the sportsmanship out of the way, I laughed when the rest of the team rushed over to me. They huddled around and hugged my middle as I laughed, "Hey! Let go of me, you guys stink!"

"Even me Mama Daisy?" Junior pouted up at me.

"Of course not, you're cute and you smell like sunshine," I nuzzled him with a laugh.

I looked up and saw Bowser approaching. Yet again he had a strut going and he only seemed to radiate arrogant testosterone in the post victory air. He grinned in that infectious way of his where he looked both pleased and terrifying.

Incisors sharp and dangerous in a predatory grin, his carmine eyes were smoldering with an animalistic blaze and they were honed in on me. He let out a furious victory roar; a cry that was both bloodthirsty yet triumphant; the way a lion would roar after a kill.

And even as the team congratulated their king and put all attention on him, his blazing eyes were locked on me. The intensity, the unnamed _hunger_ of the look made me shiver in a way I could not describe and I blushed _hard_, shyly and averting my gaze.

As he strolled passed the stands a particularly amorous Koopette wrapped her slender arms around his neck, purring loudly. Amused, Bowser turned to look up at her.

"Oh my _King_," she purred, batting her pretty lilac eyes, "Your performance on the field was so…_enticing_."

Bowser chuckled, arching an interested eyebrow and I almost gasped when I saw the Koopette starting to draw flirtatious circles on his plastron, "I only wonder what _else_ his majesty can do with such..._vigor_."

_Oh my Stars_, was this Koopette harlot throwing herself at Bowser or what? The way her purple eyes were hooded and the suggestive purr in her voice were all but too obvious. I was even more shocked when Bowser reciprocated her smoldering look.

He watched; smirking as his crimson orbs carefully followed every flirtatious movement her manicured claws made upon his person. I was disgusted at the way she ran her painted pink claws tantalizingly over his carapace. Just when I thought I couldn't watch anymore, Bowser leaned back and whispered something in her ears.

Bowser threw one last smirk at her before he stomped off. The Koopette looked stunned, her pretty purple eyes wide and round when he left.

"Enjoy the game Flower?"

When I felt him put his arms around me, the last thing I wanted near me was anything that Koopa harlot had touched! I was a bit miffed and sidestepped his affectionate grab. Bowser frowned, perhaps a bit put off at my behavior and I spoke, "I hope you don't have plans with that…_woman_ later!"

I turned to stomp off and I felt Bowser catch up to me in three easy strides. I was frowning, hobbling along on crutches trying to forget the way he looked at that Koopa lady. I could just remember the 'bedroom eyes' they were both giving each other. And the way Bowser was staring at her, why it was as if he was going to…

Going to…

Well, throw her on the field and have his way with her right then and there!

"Woman…?" his look of confusion melted away and he suddenly grinned, "Wait, _you_ saw that?"

"How could I not have!" I spewed, hissing angrily, "She was all _over_ you!"

He looked extremely content for some reason, "Well I _am _King Koopa, the most studly, most powerful Koopa in the kingdom. I'm pretty sure I could pull _any_ woman from that crowd."

I gasped; they all threw themselves at him like that? That Bowser could treat them like a buffet and pick and choose whichever one of those women he wanted?

"T-That's shameful that they throw themselves at you that way," I frowned, "I hope you don't go for it."

"Why? You're not _jealous_ are you?" he purred with flashing eyes.

I spluttered, "What! No! I just can't _stand_ women like them, women who openly throw themselves at men! They make the rest of us look bad."

"Koopa women are far more forward than you humans are. I think it's a rather big turn on. Perhaps it's something you girls oughta start doin'."

I huffed, "Well we're not quite as desperate as they are, just don't fall for their charm."

"Hmm," Bowser suddenly stepped in front of my path, clearly meaning to block my way.

He lowered his head, grinning roguishly at me. He emitted a loud rumbling purr before he spoke and for some reason I couldn't name, that brought a flush to my cheeks, "You know who I'd go after if she threw herself at me?"

"Uh…" I blinked befuddled by the smoldering look on his face. It was twice as intense as the look that he gave that one amorous Koopa lady.

"If _you_ were desperately after me," his eyes burned, alive suddenly and red-hot like the flames of fire. Then that rumbling, deep purr oozed into this speech, "why you'd have the King Koopa wrapped around your pretty little thumb."

I felt my face flush as he continued to stare at me; Stars! He was holding up traffic doing this! The rest of our teammates were walking around us to the locker room, and as they went passed they gave us questioning looks.

The longer he stared, the hotter my face became and it felt like torture trying to hold his stare. Oh Stars, _why_ is that look of his doing this to me? I…I've never felt so _weird_ by a look he's given me, or a look anyone's given me before. My stomach was in knots and my heart was beating as if I had run a marathon.

I gulped and looked up at him from under my bangs. He must have seen something he liked, because his grin stretched even larger upon his face. Gosh I know I must be blushing furiously now.

"Now come on," he lifted me into his arms, "We've got to take care of that knee of yours."

"B-Bowser!" I squeaked angrily, "Will you put me down! I can walk on my own two feet."

Being hauled around when we were alone was different. But him picking me up in public where thousands of people and cameras where around was not good. I pounded my fists against his carapace, "Let me go Bowser! There's people who can see us! I can walk just fine!"

"Actually you can't," he smirked, "If you could you wouldn't need those crutches."

As we trudged back to the locker room I looked up at him, "You're that concerned about me huh O studly Koopa king?"

"Maybe," he smirked, "Or maybe I know that with a knee injury you're gonna be wearing nothing but shorts and that means I can ogle at those long legs of yours all day now."

Yet again I punched him in the arm and he chortled. Halfway towards the locker room Junior appeared and ran beside us.

"Hey King Dad! Heya Mama!"

"Squirt."

"Heya Junior!" I looked at him smugly, "Oh by the way you and I need to have a talk."

He blinked up at me, "Huh, about what?"

I smiled deviously, "About _girls_."

As Junior's face went deep red, Bowser's head snapped to attention, "Huh…?"

I winked at him, "Don't think I didn't see you and Toadette!"

I laughed at how pink his cheeks burned, "B-B-But-!"

I giggled as Bowser's head snapped between looking at me, and looking at his son, "Girls? Wait? What's going on here!"

"We'll talk about this later," I winked at Junior who still remained a charming shade of red.

* * *

><p>"Your tea sire?"<p>

"Thank you Toada."

"Your breakfast is ready."

In the wee hours of morning, the reigning emperor of Sarasaland sat in his luxurious bedchambers. It was nearly dawn and just the first touches of sunlight were appearing. It was a rare sight that only few very trusted servants of the royal family got to see, and that was the prestigious emperor as being bleary-eyed and half-asleep.

Cloaked in a silk ebon robe and with his dark locks untamed, Sakuro yawned openly as he picked up a knife and added a bit of peach jam onto freshly baked muffins. He took a small bite and closed his eyes in pleasurable bliss as he savored the taste; these fresh, buttery muffins that melted in your mouth made waking up before the crack of dawn completely and utterly worthwhile.

The maid, Toada, returned with his majesty's daily paper and with a soft mutter of thanks, Emperor Sakuro opened the Sarasaland's paper, The Daily Blabbermouth. His eyes skimmed quickly over the appraisals of the rising stock market, thanks all in part to the new retail and sales going on through the new agreement and alliance with the Darklands Kingdom.

Sakuro smirked; he ought to bring this paper to Salini and stick this column right under his nose. That would show that old bat for questioning _him_. With a quick sip of tea he flipped the page, turning to look at the weather a bit, maybe even see if he was mentioned in the gossip columns as usual.

Last year the gossip columns had all but named him 'desert hunk of the year' and 'the most eligible bachelor.' Sakuro chuckled at the thought, shaking his head at the ridiculous stuff the journalists wrote about.

_I haven't been married in over twenty years, and quite frankly I do not plan to change that now._

He turned the page to the sports section and just as he indifferently scanned the title, he did a double take when he saw who was in the large picture. The title of the article read, '_The Darkland Dragons Thrash The Mushroom Magic in a 8-1 victory_.' There, in a picture below the heading was his daughter.

Sakuro squinted hard at the picture, hoping to make his tired eyes focus properly. Not only was she in the picture but she was being _held_ by the King Bowser. The King Koopa was grinning cruelly while Daisy was looking up at him, laughing. Sakuro twitched when he realized the king was holding his daughter in the 'bridal style.'

The subtitle beneath the picture read: _In the post air victory, King Bowser and our very own Princess Daisy celebrate. And what's with the dreamy eye contact? Does victory also bring budding romance?_

Sakuro didn't notice how one of her legs was bandaged up or even that she held a crutch but all he knew was that some Koopa—some _male_ had the audacity to hold his daughter like a _bride_!

_Stars above help me. Some male is trying to move in on my little girl. My clueless little girl. I knew this Koopa was crazy for her. I knew it. I'll kill him. I'll use a rusted spoon. Hmm, I'm an Emperor so it'll have to be quite discreet...I'll hire some desert theives to do it. It'll be under the table and covert..._

A bit heated, the emperor read the entire article diligently and apparently Daisy had played with Bowser's team and she had also injured her cousin! The emperor lowered the paper scowling; so first Daisy hurts her cousin, then she allows herself to carried, seen in such a precarious position in public!

Men got strange ideas in their heads when they carried a woman in their arms. Sakuro himself had carried his wife on their wedding night. He could remember looking into her soft, dark blue eyes when she blushed.

That same romantic image was nearly captured with the King Koopa and his daughter. Emperor Sakuro nearly snarled at the thought. With a frustrated groaned, Sakuro ran a hand through his hair; what was he going to do with that daughter of his?

Stars, knowing Daisy, she had absolutely _no _clue about this. As Sakuro narrowed his blue eyes in thought, everything made sense: the Darklands sudden interest in building trades with Sarasaland and his daughter's weekend trips to 'discuss' business with King Bowser.

The Emperor closed his eyes in deep thought; what was he going to do about this dilemma?

* * *

><p>Elsewhere another source had been looking at the same paper that Emperor Sakuro had been. However unlike the king of Sarasaland, this person was amused. He looked at the image of Bowser with a deep fascination. The Demon Lord was carrying the smiling, pretty princess of the Sarasaland kingdom.<p>

_Let's see now; round-childlike eyes, a sweet face and a blinding smile. Not bad, King Koopa has some pretty good taste in human girls. He's fallen for a cute little human royal._

Before him were a flock of his faithful servants. Several ninji, each of the men masters in martial arts, were cloaked in dark swarthy colors save the leader who wore a striking shade of red. As he scanned the newspaper, they all kneeled, awaiting until they were summoned.

"Rise," and immediately the ninji did as told.

"So King Bowser has feelings for this little cutie hmm?" a long ivory claw slowly trailed upon the newspaper. It slowly trailed from Bowser's grinning visage onto Daisy's face.

"That is correct," the red clad ninja leader spoke crossing his arms, "Even the king's son refers to her as 'mother.' The King has shown a great deal of interest in the princess. He has taken her to visit his son's school, to a candy shop and most recently they played a game of soccer."

The rough, grating voice managed to sound smooth like satin as it spoke, "Intriguing. And do you believe the Sarasaland princess will continue to become closer to him? Close to Bowser like a pet?"

The lead ninja nodded, "That is correct your lordship."

"Is Bowser protective of the little girl?"

"Quite," the ninji leader nodded his head, "The king even referred to her as 'mine.'"

"Very possessive indeed," the smooth voice growled with pleasure, "Almost like a Koopa marking it's mate."

The long claw traveled over Bowser's face and with a quick slash destroyed his image in the newspaper. His claw hovered over the black and white image of Daisy's smiling face. The long talons moved over the picture gently, as if they could caress the flesh of her face.

A chuckle, "Very well then. I would like you to continue monitoring them for me. Originally I thought the little princess would be a problem for my plans…but she may be the key to the king's undoing."

The paper was discarded onto the table; he had seen enough. King Bowser looked absolutely ludicrous as a love-stricken fool in that picture and it made him sick. No woman, no matter how lovely or darling should have that much dominion over any man, especially the Demon Lord.

"Continue your work and keep a close eye upon these two," the smooth voice spoke in its pleasant droll, "I would like to hear more reports about their…budding relationship."

Along with his men, the red assassin bowed, "Of course."

"Now you may go, I have much to think over."

The ninji issued another bow to their superior and in a whirlwind of leaves, they vanished. The figure reclined in his seat contemplatively. So King Bowser had a thing for this new girl? He could see why; she was pretty cute for a little human girl and he had heard rumors of how fiery she was.

A Koopa and a princess huh?

How very interesting.

* * *

><p>Alice: Hope you enjoyed! ^_^ (waves) Lol! Bowser made Daisy's uniform mucho smexy! Rawr! Lol! ^_^ Review please!<p> 


	9. Baby Blues: A day on the yacht with King

Alice: Woohoo! The reviews are awesome! And also delicious!

Ultrra: (blinks)…Declicious? Reviews have…flavor!

Alice: You didn't know that? This review tastes like cherries…this one tastes like blueberry…strawberries…Pumpkin pie…

Ulttra: Have reviews always been flavored?

Alice: And scented! ^_^

Ultrra: Hmmm…so what if the review is a flame?

Alice: Oh, then those taste like mud! And no one likes to eat mud.

Ultrra: How about constructive criticism reviews?

Alice: The ones that really want to help you? Those taste like veggies. Not always tasty but good for you nonetheless lol!

Ultrra: Ah…I see.

Alice: Hee ^_^ So anyways, I'm glad everyone really liked last chapter! That one was super fun to write! ^_^ hehe! Was it cool or what!

Ultrra: I must give you a compliment because it was pretty epic.

Alice: (stares)…What did you just say? O_O

Ultrra:…Huh? What? What's going on? O_O

Alice: You said you'd give me a…?

Ultrra: A compliment?

Alice: Wait, wait, I have to get ready for this.

Ultrra:…Get ready?

Alice: (puts a mic in front of Ultrra and puts a spotlight on him. Brings out three people who have cameras and two who are just watching)

Ultrra:….Uh…what the hell is this…? (looks at the camera people) And who are they! O_O

Alice: Well, three of the dudes are recording this for factual proof that you are complimenting me, and the two guys without cameras are witnesses. Now then (Pulls up a chair and stares)…I'm waiting…

Ultrra:…Well…Uh…last chapter Alice…you did…good…It was…cool…

Alice: Great! ^_^ (turns to five others) And thank you! It's a wrap.

Ultrra: (Watches the five other guys leave)…Okay, what was that all about! Who were those creeps!

Alice: They weren't creeps. They were very nice guys who wanted to help me! I have to document every compliment you give me! ^_^ The last one was in…(goes through a book)…The seventh grade!

Ultrra: I hope you didn't pay them…And that's a lie! XD I've complimented you before then!

Alice: (crosses arms) Yeah? And when was that!

Ultrra: Last Christmas when you wore that sweater…?

Alice: That was my sister…

Ultrra: At Thanksgiving, didn't you make the cookies? Those were awesome!

Alice: My mom did…

Ultrra: You…(Thinks)…

Alice: (Stares intently)…

Ultrra:…Hmm…Well…

Alice: (Stares harder)

Ultrra:…You watered your neighbor's garden really well…

Alice: (Incredulous)…What?

Ultrra: Yeah! It's true! The garden's always super green…and…green… O_O ^_^

Alice: (Speaking slowly)…I watered a garden _well…_that's the _only _thing you could think of!

Ultrra: It was well done!

Alice: (Eyes glow red and growls)….

Ultrra: O_O She's going super sayian 1200 again! The world may blow up!

Alice: (turns to audience) So _anyways! _After and epic chapter like last time, the characters are going to relax a bit in this one! But it'll still be awesome all the same! We learn about more of Daisy's deeper feelings! So I hope you all will enjoy the chapter! ^_^

Utrra: (scratches head)…I don't see how watering a garden is such a bad thing…

* * *

><p><strong><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>**

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>"Please tell me you did <em>not<em> do that!"

In conjunction with Bowser's thunderous guffaws I doubled over, holding my stomach as I spewed laughter. I laughed so hard my abdominal ached as tears pricked the corners of my eyes. So today's Saturday and again we're _supposed_ to be discussing how to improve the new treaties between Sarasaland and the Darklands.

"And then he was like 'I have the chortles!' And I was like, 'I have an ass kicking!'"

So instead of discussing business what do we do?

"Wow he's weird."

"Heh, Flower you should have seen it," Bowser crossed his arms and grinned sharply, "I pounded the _snot _out of that freak show. I punched him into the orbits."

I laughed, "He sounds weird. Like real creeper status."

"Weird just ain't weird enough to describe him. Ugh, just thinking of him makes my scales crawl," Bowser shuddered.

Yeah…we're _not_ discussing anything close to kingdom related business. The entire trip we've been swapping stories; Bowser's tales were about his misadventures against Mario and they were hilarious.

"Cherry daiquiri wine my Lord? Milady?" A servant appeared holding a tray of drinks.

"Smokin'!" Bowser smirked, grabbing the giant goblet for himself and handed the dainty wine glass to me, "You've got to try this, Flower."

" I guess I will then!" I laughed.

"Here's to being on the most awesome yacht with an awesome desert babe," Smirking, Bowser elevated his massive goblet.

I know my cheeks must have been pink, "And here's to a beautiful day and sharing it with the Lord of all Koopas and his darling son."

And with that, we clanked our glasses and drank.

We're taking a relaxing ride on one of Bowser's many luxurious yachts. The day was gorgeous; clear sky for miles and the water a mesmerizing shade of sparkling amethyst. The temperature was perfect, if not a little muggy. We kicked back on the deck, the sun pleasant and warm.

A handful of diligent servants traveled the deck offering various delicious hors d'oeuvres as we lounged. Decked in a blue tank top and shorts, I reclined next to the head Koopa with my injured leg elevated. We sampled various meats, yogurts, cream desserts and now I had a bubbling, shimmering glass of cherry daiquiri wine in hand.

Bowser chugged the drink down effortlessly, wiping his mouth with his arm and smirking as I almost choked on the first sip. The drink was delicious but it was strong; like downing gasoline or cleaning solution!

I took another sip and the strength of the beverage flooded my sinuses as heat traveled through my chest. My throat burned as I coughed and Bowser grinned, "Take it easy Flower. Cherry daiquiri wine may sound weak but you've got to remember it was made with Koopa liquor. The _good _stuff."

"K-Koopa," I continued coughing, "Liq-quor?"

"Yep," Bowser smirked, "We have our own _booze. _Your human grade of liquor just isn't strong enough to get us tipsy without severe alcohol poisoning. So we've got our own liquor that'll get us nice and trashed."

"How strong is this stuff!?" I glanced at the innocent looking wine glass skeptically, "It's like drinking gasoline!"

"Hmm," he squinted at me, "You're pretty small, even for human standards. I'd say you're done after this glass."

"O-Okay," I hid a hiccup.

"Timberrrrr!"

Junior jumped off the diving board and entered the pool with a splash. A couple of servants—who had been hired to watch the prince play—clapped and some even held up scorecards to rate his dive. I grinned, watching as Junior splashed around in the pool, showing off as he performed cannon balls and belly flops. I wouldn't tell Bowser this, but it was the cutest thing that Junior wore matching swim trunks to be like his dad.

"Heya Mama Daisy!"

"Hey Junior!" I grinned, waving at him.

"King Dad! Come on in and join me!" Junior waved from the pool.

Bowser turned and looked at me, "You won't miss me too much when I'm with Junior will you?"

I hiccuped, "No not at all! Just have fun. I'll be okay with this wine."

"Good, just don't inhale it all at once." then he turned to Junior and the pool, "_BONZAI_!"

He took a running dash and with a large leap, Bowser performed a cannonball and plunged into the pool with a gleeful laugh. A massive tidal wave rose from the pool as servants scattered and Junior was swept under. A spray of water smacked my face, almost knocking me out of my seat.

When Bowser surfaced a couple of the servants clapped while others held up '10' scorecards. I checked my drink and once I knew it wasn't ruined, I grinned. I sipped, watching as father and son played around.

They raced, had diving contests and even the infamous 'I-can-hold-my-breath-longer-than-you' game. I laughed as Bowser grabbed his son's head and dunked Junior underwater. After a lot of floundering on Junior's part, the prince surfaced, spluttering, "Hey King Dad can we play the submarine game?"

Bowser rolled his eyes, as if it was such a _chore_. While he grumbled and complained I noticed that he flipped over, now floating on his back. Junior squealed happily and quickly sat on the middle of his dad's stomach, laughing as Bowser paddled backwards into the water.

"The SS Bowser Voyager submarine has set sail and already we are treading in dangerous waters," Junior spoke softly, as if he was narrating a television show, "Our supplies are running low…and…the toilets are clogged. We need an S.O.S."

I spit out my drink, laughing. Bowser, who was Junior's submarine, arched an eyebrow and grinned.

"It is day 352 and the only food left are kerokero colas and mushrooms…The men are starting to turn on each other…Things look dicey…"

"Oh no!" Bowser called out suddenly.

"What?" Junior asked, blinking down at him, "What is it Cadet! Speak man! Speak!"

"Captain, the SS Bowser's sinking…!" Bowser roared, "We're taking in water!"

"Oh no!" Junior cried, giggling happily.

"Take in a deep breath sir!" Bowser commanded, "We're going under!"

Bowser's head and torso soon sank underwater as Junior shrieked happily. Just as the water was starting to lap at his chest, Junior took a deep breath and puffed out his cheeks adorably.

Junior submerged underwater and the 'SS Bowser submarine' was underway. The surface of the water smoothed over just moments after, as if they were never there in the first place.

"Hey, can I have a-another drink of that stuff?" I asked a servant.

"But of course," and just like that I had another cherry daiquiri beverage.

I took a sip as heat settled in the pit of my belly; just seeing their close father-son relationship made me ponder about my relationship with Father. Emperor Sakuro was a prestigious, sophisticated noble. There was no way he would do anything like this with me. Playing 'pretend' wasn't something a man of my father's status would do.

But shouldn't that same idea apply to Bowser? He was hailed as the most powerful ruler of the Darklands and an evil tyrant, so where did playing and swimming with his child fall into that regime? If the so called evil, licentious King Bowser could play with his child then couldn't my father have played with me?

Most of my fond childhood memories were of a loving, doting mother; a woman who had silken ribbons of rose-red hair and beautiful dark, cerulean blue eyes. Rose, the name befitting of a woman with a shock of cherry-red hair and lush rubicund lips. Her name also paid homage to her undenaible beauty.

Then the calm of the pool was disrupted as the Koopas surfaced. Both of them shook water off of their person reminiscent of a dog ridding its fur of water. I watched Bowser and Junior wordlessly; both of the Koopas were laughing, Bowser holding his son in his arms and Junior looking at his father with reverence only a son could give his hero.

I used to be that way with my mother. She wore her hair in elegant up-dos and as a child I tried to fix my messy hair up just like hers. However, where her hair was silken and soft, mine was coarse and thick.

My mother would laugh at how terrible my hair would look and when she brushed out tangles and knots ever patiently, she promised when I became a lady she would teach me how to do my hair like hers.

A sharp pain churned my stomach; she didn't live long enough to teach me how to do my hair, how to deal with boys or even how to handle the new changes and awkwardness that came along with becoming a young woman.

Perhaps Father wouldn't have gotten in the pool and held me the way Bowser did Junior but Mother would have. I took a deeper gulp of the wine to dull the ache; Father detested me. I could see it in his eyes. They were cold and emotionless every time they fell upon me.

Living under Father's steel hand felt like permanent scrutiny, as if he was always waiting for error. I was the imperfect daughter of a perfect sovereign. Emperor Sakuro was ingenious, talented and ethereally beautiful.

He had married the perfect queen who was sweet, beautiful and exceedingly feminine. Then he had a daughter like me. Every time I was in the Mushroom Kingdom, I would hear of the hundreds of suitors Peach had after her.

At the news of an interested suitor, Peach would blush prettily, humbled some guy could _possibly_ like her. Father would probably turn flips if I had someone interested. I bet he has a hard time trying to sell me off to any suitor; wouldn't be surprised if he would have to pay some prince.

I took another sip of the cherry wine and hid a belch within my palm. Heat rose to my cheeks as my head swam a bit; okay that was enough with the Koopa wine. I snapped to when Bowser guffawed loudly. He was holding something red in one hand as he pointed at Junior gleefully.

"Hey Flower!" Bower called out. He turned to face me, grinning evilly.

"_Daaaaaad_!" Junior whined, his cheeks burning dark red. The Koopaling glared at his dad, trying to grab the item from his father, "King Dad! N-Not in front of Mama!"

I squinted, trying to see what Bowser was waving around like a flag. It was a pair of small trunks and considering the way Junior was glaring at his dad, they must have been his. I spit out a bit of wine and laughed, "Bowser, give them back to Junior and quit being a jerk!"

With a chuckle Bowser threw the shorts in Junior's face. A wet splat sounded as the shorts connected with the little Koopa's face.

"Ugh! Hey I can't see! Oh no! The Captain of the SS Bowser Voyager has been assaulted!"

Bowser crawled out of the water and immediately the servants fell over themselves, fighting to give him towels. He snatched one up from the nearest servant and dried off. Then just as fast as he grabbed it, he threw the used towel back into the same servant's arms.

"Well I believe I did my fatherly duties and kicked my son's ass enough for today," he smirked contently while Junior continued to give him the evil-eye from the pool. Bowser arched an eyebrow and smirked, "That look is saying you want me to come back in there…"

"Eep!" Junior grabbed a Koopa-shaped inner tube and began to pedal away.

"Fatherly duties eh?" I said more so to myself.

"Yep," he stretched and as he did his spine popped, "Ohohaha yeah that felt _good_."

Again I was gifted with a rare opportunity to see Bowser without his shell. The King Koopa was surprisingly _ripped_. As I sipped my wine, my attention honed onto his rippling stomach. His abdominals were beautifully defined and separated. Why did he even wear a shell? It had to be a crime to be _that _chiseled. Stars, I don't think I've ever seen anyone with abs like those.

"See something you _like_, princess?" Bowser smirked, eyes glowing mischievously.

The words rolled off my tongue before I could think, "Stars, it must be illegal to be so ripped. Your abs are pretty hot."

I froze, realizing what slipped out of my mouth. I squeaked, slapping both hands to my mouth in dread. Bowser blinked before grinning happily, almost borderline maniacal. It was scary because I had _never _seen him grin that largely before. I mean, I could like see all his teeth for Stars sakes…

It was a smile he would make if he imagined Mario being tortured for all eternity.

I spluttered; gaping in resolute horror as my face glowed tomato-red. Bowser bent closer until he eclipsed my sunlight. His grin was borderline sinful, " '_Pretty hot'_ eh?" Then his voice oozed into a deep purr, "You know if you beg, I just might let you touch 'em."

He stared, eyes half-lidded with a smile of sin and my mortification rose terrifically. I squeaked pathetically. I tried to hobble out of my seat but Bowser wrapped an arm securely around my waist. Chuckling, he arched a mischievous eyebrow, "Oh no you don't. I'm not letting you get out of this one that easily."

He wrapped his other arm around me in a hug, "Now we can snuggle and if you ask, I _might_ let you have your way with me."

"Bowser, Junior's at the pool!" I hissed, face reddening.

A deep sigh, "…Okay _fine,_ you can have your way with me."

"Bowser!" I growled, "…Junior could be seeing this!"

"A child needs to see his parents being affectionate. Although there's just _some_ grown stuff his kiddie eyes shouldn't see 'til he's at least ten years older. We'll just go into the other room and handle the grown stuff ourselves."

"_Bowser!_"

He guffawed, scooping me into his arms with an enviable ease. Still embarassed, I glared at him. I think I'm getting too used to being carrying around everywhere.

"Come on," he grinned, "I wanna try the new mud bath installed on the ship. The architects have been bragging about it all week and said they put in the latest goomba-style jet tub with Koopa marble furnishings and blah, blah, blah."

"Mudbath?" I blinked, peering at my clothing, "But I don't have a bathing suit."

A slight quirk of a smile, "Taken care of it."

I glared, "I am not wearing anything _you've_ chosen out for me!"

Oh Stars, I could only imagine the horrifying swimsuit. It would be a scandalous bikini, probably fire-engine red and nothing but strings. Or maybe something black and all leather. With spikes, he really loved spikes and I'd look like a dominatrix. I shuddered.

Bowser chuckled as he carried me into the cruiser's spare guest room, "What? You don't trust me?"

He set me down on a plush bed. I crossed my arms and raised an eyebrow, "Even if you removed half of my brain I _still _wouldn't trust you."

"You'll be surprised at my taste in swimswear! Just you wait to be stunned…Now where did I put that thing at…?"

Mumbling to himself, Bowser dug around through a wardrobe, throwing out articles of clothes at random. He went through drawers, cursing as he continued his search. While he was on a quest to find this so-called great swimsuit, my eyes fell to his swishing tail.

I don't know if liquor was feeding my odd ideas but for a second I thought about touching it. His tail didn't move consciously but in response to his emotions. His tail wagged when he was happy but what did it do when he was angry?

Just as I went to reach for his tail, I halted. It might be an offensive thing to do in Koopa culture. And besides, would I like it if Bowser tried to touch my head just to see what human hair felt like?

_Yeah….I'll contribute this strange behavior to the liquor…_

Bowser found what he was looking for as he spun around with a grin. It was obvious he was hiding something behind his back. I arched an eyebrow at the sight of his spreading grin.

"Close your eyes Flower," he was beaming like an idiot.

I rolled my eyes and closed them promptly. His hand gently held my own. For a moment he rubbed my hands softly, almost like a massage, then a silky material slid into my hands, "Okay, now open those peepers of yours."

I did as commanded and studied my gift. I unfurled the silk and was surprised at how beautiful it was. It was a silver monokini that managed to be both modest and sexy at the same time. It covered the essentials but there was an opening to show off a girl's back and stomach.

I looked at Bowser and sighed, "You would give me this to go into a _mudbath_."

He chuckled, crimson eyes studying me closely, "You like it right?"

"It's gorgeous Bowser. It's very beautiful!" I smiled, still admiring the silver swimsuit.

He winked, "See I told you it would be great. Well if you need help getting into and _out _of it…"

I tried not to let him see me smile, "Just get outta here already King Koopa."

The furthest I could banish Bowser was outside as I changed. With a sigh I pinned my hair into a messy bun and set to work. The wrappings around my knee were light enough I could step into the monokini unaided. I gingerly dressed, making sure to keep weight off my bad knee as I pulled on the beautiful swimwear.

I looked at my reflection and grinned; wow, wearing this I look like I have a figure! I may not see the long Barbie-doll legs Bowser claims but I do look like I have hips and a slim waist line. Not too bad if I got to say. This definitely feels more comfortable then the bikini I bought with Wendy.

I wobbled as I stood on my feet, "Whoa."

"Knocky, knocky," Bowser chuckled, "Can a guy Koopa come in now?"

"Sure, come on in." Standing was already trying my knee, so I carefully sat down.

Bowser entered and the moment I fell into his vision, a sharp grin appeared "Damn I've got top of the line taste."

"I know," I looked at my new swimsuit and smiled.

He smirked audaciously, "Yeah and the swimsuit ain't that bad either."

I blinked trying to wrap my head around what he said. Bowser shook his head at me, "What an airhead. Well up we go Flower."

"Airhead! Who are you calling an—_hey_!"

He scooped me into his arms, carrying me down the hall. He kicked a door open and entered the room. It was a spa decorated with modern ivory and charcoal furnishings and beautiful cream-scent candles were romantically scattered, bathing the room in a soft golden glow.

The center of the spa held a large, deep tub surrounded by the dancing flames of candlelight. And since Bowser said this was a mudbath, would I be wrong to think the tub was filled with mud? Though last I checked mud didn't smell like a sweet cinnamon fragrance. Bowser brought us both over to stand near the tub, staring into the chocolate liquid.

Silent for a moment, we both gazed into the cocoa-colored goop. In my opinion it didn't look all that appealing. He glanced at me with a quirky smile, "Well…?"

I laughed, "I dunno what to think!"

"Both go in together?" he grinned.

"That works."

As he stepped into the mud, he slowly slipped me in. I sighed pleasantly, surprised at the soothing warmth and pleasant scent. It didn't carry the normal icky, goopy feeling of normal mud. It was thick like the consistency of pudding and imbued with a spicy cinnamon aroma.

"Oh! Yeah this is awesome," I laughed.

"Lemme see…"

As Bowser settled into the bath, sinking inch by inch, he released a groan of pleasure. He rested both beefy arms outside of the tub and closed his eyes contently. I smirked; something tells me King Koopa approves!

"Damn this feels good," he purred, releasing a deep sigh.

"You know I really admire how you are with Junior," I smiled as he opened his eyes, peering my way.

"Hmm, how so?"

"You're a good father. You play with your son and just when I watch you two interact, I can tell how much you love him. But it goes both ways, it's obvious how much Junior adores you. You're like a hero to him." I spoke softly.

Bowser chuckled softly, "Yeah? Well isn't that what fathers are supposed to do? Beat the living crap out of their kids then point out their fails."

"My father wasn—isn't like that at all." I felt my cheeks burn at the admission.

Bowser remained silent so I thought it was safe to continue, "Father is hailed as the greatest ruler of Sarasaland's history. He's amazing: smart, equable, diplomatic; the perfect ruler and…and," my voice became soft, "then he ends up with a daughter like me."

This time his expression was indistinguishable, "What does that mean?"

I laughed dryly, "It means I'm a screw up. I'm so boyish, rough and unrefined, everything a real princess isn't. And I'm clumsy—oh hell even you've said that. I've never been close to my father because I feel he's ashamed of me…And he has a right to be…I'm the stain to his perfect legacy."

It must have been the courage of liquor running through my veins. I was suddenly spilling my soul, my deepest insecurities to the king, there was no other explanation for it. When I peered at Bowser his expression was no longer relaxed but hard like cobblestone, "I…I don't think I've ever heard him tell me, 'I love you'…"

I wiped at my eyes angrily, "He just evaluates me as a future ruler. I…I mean nothing to him but being responsible for carrying on his bloodline. I…I fail as a proper lady but perhaps if I may marry a suitor who could make Sarasaland wealthy…and birth a m-male heir, I might make up for being such a failure."

Bowser growled, glaring into the mud. He clenched his left fist, cracking his knuckles as he did so. When he spoke his voice was rougher, "Flower I don't ever want to hear that shit again."

Startled, I peered up, "What…?"

"You are worth something," he was glaring at me now as smoke wafted from his mouth, "Just because you're free-spirited and strong doesn't make you any less of a 'proper woman' than some broad like Peach. If Emperor_Starrod-stuck-up-his-ass_ Sakuro is too deluded to see it, then it's his own damn fault."

I gaped as he continued, "And men _must_ be crazy if they don't see how amazing you are. If they're too much of pansies to handle a woman who speaks what's on her mind, then those pricks don't even deserve you."

I was grinning like an idiot; his speech had touched me to the core. Never had anyone said something so sincere and so sweet before. I smiled and before I knew it, I reached over and hugged him. Instead of coming into contact with a hard shell, I pressed against a wall of hard, warm flesh.

I gasped, his muscles grew tense as our skin touched. I pulled away, blushing and even ducking my head a bit, "You're uh…warm."

Bowser unfroze and chuckled, "Well _duh_, I don't wear a shell just for fashion, although it is pretty badass eh?"

"Well…I didn't know you could take your shell off," I spoke softly, "I mean, before I met you."

He chuckled, reclining comfortably again, "Well, can't you take _your _clothes off? Same thing with Koopas; we put shells on and we take 'em off."

"Oh…" I tried to ignore the amused look as he studied me.

So what was even the point of wearing a shell? Bowser appeared far taller and leaner without one and wearing his shell, he hunched over and moved slow. What was the point of wearing such a heavy thing?

"Your shell has to be heavy, why wear it?"

"It's exactly three hundred and ninety pounds," he replied with a smirk.

I gaped," My Stars it's that heavy!? Geesh! Don't you worry it'll crush you!?"

"Heh of course not. A Koopa should be able to easily wear their shell and as the studly king, it's a feat of strength. My shell is the heaviest of all Koopas bar none."

"Interesting, so wearing a shell that heavy is like saying 'I'm so strong!' Right?"

He chuckled, "Right. _No one _has a shell heavier than mine."

"So how much are those uh bracers you wear? The spiky ones?"

"One hundred even," he was still smirking.

"My Stars you're strong!" I gasped in awe.

He purred, "Oh baby, you're making me blush."

I laughed before studying him, "So...Um…Koopas don't hatch from eggs…then?"

_Sheyt. _Tipsy slip number two.

Bowser grinned insidiously, "I'm afraid not Flower. But I think there's another question you _really_ wanna ask, don't you?"

I flushed red-hot and looked away; _do Koopas have sex?_

I could feel—yes _feel_—the smugness and strength of his amusement radiating from him; like ultra-violet radiation. That sadistic smile didn't waver for a second, "Well let me make it easy for you princess, us Koopas 'reproduce' in the same way you humans do."

He leaned forward, giving a hooded stare, "Only I know we do it _better."_

"Uh..."

With his stare I blushed even hotter; being in the mudbath with so little clothing suddenly seemed inappropriate. It also didn't help that he looked as if he were about to bust out laughing.

"O-oh I see," I tried to avoid looking at him, "So uh, eight kids huh? That means you've had a lot of practice."

His delighted laughter echoed through the room and yet again my face flamed. As he continued to laugh loudly, I hid my face in my hands; note to self, _go easy_ on the Koopa wine. Apparently I'm more tipsy than what I give myself credit for.

"The term 'stud' refers to all aspects of my life Flower," he looked like he wanted to laugh again. The humor vanished as his eyes slanted, "You haven't had any _practice _with that _Luigi_ guy have you!?"

This time I tried not to laugh, "I thought I told you Lulu is just my friend! Almost like a brother really."

Bowser snorted, clearly not convinced, "Oh yeah? Then explain the goo-goo eyes he was givin' ya at the soccer game? Heh, glad I kicked his ass."

"He wasn't giving me 'goo-goo' eyes!" I rolled my eyes, still very amused, "I suppose with this 'makeover' your daughter helped give me, I look super unbelievably different."

Bowser scratched his chin, "I'd say just softer. You still look the same in my opinion, just more I dunno, refined?"

"Thanks."

I self-consciously patted my hair. Though it was in a messy bun at the top of my head, it was still straight and long from when Parry had flat-ironed it.

"So," he grinned crookedly, red eyes bright with interest, "You haven't had _any '_practice'? None at all!?"

I realized what he was getting at. I blushed deeply and probably all the way to the roots of my hair. I didn't meet his stare as I shook my head. I didn't trust my voice.

"Really!? _No way_," Bowser laughed, eying me with keen interest, "You're telling me you've _never-?"_

"N-No!" My voice broke. I swallowed the lump in my throat, face aflame, "I...H-Haven't..."

Bowser closed his eyes, "_Tsk_. This is the proof I needed to know Human males were brain-dead. With your looks I'm surprised you haven't had any _practice_. It's almost a shame."

"Well, some of us still believe in modesty." I chuckled; or maybe for my father it was selling me out to the highest bidder and honestly who'd want a princess that wasn't pure.

Men—especially high echelon men—had this very weird idiosyncrasy about only wanting to marry virgins. They had no problems fooling around with multiple women but when it came to marriage, their wife had to be pure. Father had spoke with a couple of high-ranking diplomats interested in my hand for one of their sons.

And disturbingly enough, it seemed their first question was always if I had been 'touched'. Frankly it was none of their damn _business _if I had been 'touched' or not! I wondered if royal men looking for Peach's hand in marriage had inquired about her intimate life as well.

When I asked her, she had confirmed it as well. So while our fathers, kings who were involved in raising us to be strong, independent queens one day, I still couldn't ignore how ironic it was that Peach and I were all but ordered how important it was to keep our precious gift of virginity.

To be blunt, if he was a man we weren't going to marry, then we couldn't 'do' him.

I guess even our fathers couldn't bend some rules for us, even if these said rules were archaic; if a woman royal sleeps with someone then she's seen as 'damaged.' But heaven forbid all the stories I've heard of Prince so and so all but working his way through thousands of court ladies.

"I respect that," Bowser smirked, "Who knows, maybe one day prince charming will make the wait completely worth it."

"Ha," I snorted, "Whoever my father chooses, he'll probably have to be exceedingly strong and oh yes let's not forget rich."

"Rich eh?" Bowser narrowed his eyes, "And that's all? He doesn't have to be tall…dark and handsome?"

I shrugged, "With father he's probably more interested in seeing Sarasaland flourish. I bet my guy could be a three-legged duck and he'd marry me off as long as it was a three-legged _rich_ duck."

"Hmm," Bowser's lip curled in an ominous smirk, "How intriguing…"

He suddenly reached over and curled me under his arm. Bowser grinned down at me, "Maybe I'll hafta stop by in Sarasaland and buy off your ole man; either that or kick his ass and steal his cute heir to the throne."

Yet again I couldn't help but notice how warm he was. It was like sitting next to a furnace or something! With his shell on, I always thought he was chubby or bloated, but without his shell he was just _massive_ with muscle-etched across his frame.

I chuckled, "The day you do that, please let me know so I can be present for the buy off."

He grinned, "Oh you'll know."

For just a little while, I wasn't perturbed when Bowser pulled me closer to him. My head rested against his torso and I could feel the soft rising and falling of his chest.

He was relaxed, eyes closed and a content smirk upon his face. I don't know what it was that made me at ease around him but maybe it was because he wasn't wearing his shell? Perhaps it was symbolic in the fact that he was willing to let his guard down around me.

Because underneath that tough shell he had flesh just like the rest of us humans did. He was strong but he was still vulnerable. And now he trusted me enough to be as vulnerable as an eight foot tall Koopa could be to a human girl. I closed my eyes and relaxed as well, enjoying the warm blanket of mud.

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><p>Alice: Hope you enjoyed! R and R! ^_^ (waves)<p> 


	10. Flaming Reds: The Koopa Moon

Alice: (Valley girl voice) Like OMG Ultrra look at all the reviews! All the yummy…(licks) delicious reviews…This one's reese pieces pie flavored…(drools)

Ultrra: Hmm, well what about this review asking about the koopalings? Is it apple? Cherry? Coconut flavored?

Alice: That one's wildberry flavored! Sweet, juicy and tart all at the same time! ^_^ Omg! And Speaking of which! There's been lots of requests for the other koopalings to show up soon…well sooner than I anticipated… (worried look)

Ulttra: Well, when did you plan on having them show up?

Alice: Ummm…Well, I planned on Ludwig showing up next chapter and the others wouldn't show up until…three more chapters? XD Is that too long?

Ultrra: (shrugs) I dunno…

Alice: Also (Looks at reviewers) Do you guys know the koopalings chronological order? XD

Ultrra: Like who came first, second, third…?

Alice: Exactly! I know Ludwig is the oldest and Bowser Junior is the youngest…So does anyone know who's second oldest…third? Fourth, fifth? All the way down to Junior? XD

Ultrra: I just knew Junior was the youngest…If you reviewers know, help Ms. Starr out a bit! ;)

Alice: Another thing (claps hands together)…As we all know, I AliceStar of Fanfiction, DESPISE OCs! But something even more evil is the OC who is a MARY SUE! Argh! I just get a headache…I have seen some Mary Sues, boy have I seen some amazingly ridiculous Mary Sues! It grinds my gears! XD

Ultrra: (Smirk) Which Mary Sue are you talking about? There's exhibit A and exhibit B.

Alice: (Whispers in disgust) There's TWO kinds of…Mary Sue! O_x

Ultrra: Hellz yeah!

Alice: The world is gonna end soon…

Ultrra: Well there's exhibit A who's 'perfect'. Like she's ridiculously hot without trying, no makeup, no working out but she's still model status. Also every guy character wants her, she has a beautiful singing voice without any training and has random ass wings or something in a fanfiction universe where they're not commonplace and—

Alice: AHHHHH! MAKE IT STOP! _

Ultrra: LOL! XD

Alice: U_U Ugh…

Ultrra: And exhibit B is the 'everything bad happens to me OC, so you gotta like me by default.'

Alice: Huh? O_O I've never seen a Mary Sue like that…

Ultrra: This Mary Sue grinds my gears worse than A. 'Cause the story after awhile, gets so bad that you _want—yes _want the OC to fail/die/burn/break/snap/get thrown off the Golden Gate bridge.

Alice: UltrraShaddow! O_O That's a bit harsh don't you think!

Ultrra: No it's not at all! U_U In a story with Exhibit B any and everything bad that can happen to the OC _WILL_ happen to the OC! It's like a pity party that you're _invited _to!

Alice: So Exhibit B is a Mary Sue because…bad stuff happens? I thought Mary Sues had like…good stuff only happen?

Ultrra: Ohohoho no! Exhibit B has bad things happen to her again and again and again and again. You like get sick of it!

Alice: XD

Ultrra: It's like this; exhibit B will lose her job as a stripper and she's _only _a stripper because her parents died inside an exploding elephant when she was ten, wait five is more drastic. But what's _sad_ is that exhibit B's aunt and uncle—her sole caretakers—hate her because they're 'jealous' of her beauty and pazazz.

So after her aunt and uncle kicked her out, she became a stripper because she was breathtakingly beautiful and it was the _only_, most clichéd thing for her to do. And Exhibit B has to be pretty or we, as an audience won't care.

So while Exhibit B is forced to be a stripper—the most coveted, wanted stripper—she still _has a heart of gold_. And it's one of the friggin' canon character's jobs to 'save her.' (Turns to nearest wall and bangs head) Exhibit B is the WORST Mary Sue EVER!

Alice: (laughing) XD It sounds funny Ultrra! I'd want to read a story just to get that!

Ultrra: (Stops) I SWEAR to you that I have read stories like this! This isn't something I could make up! Like Exhibit B wouldn't be bad if there was some balance to all the bad stuff happening…

Alice: (Sighs) Well hmm…okay I don't _hate _OCs but most just aren't well done. :/ Therefore I try my best to make them none Mary Sues! XD Lol! Also in the Mario universe, like we don't know any backdrop on the characters. We never meet Daisy's parents…And I think a romantic story in which a princess doesn't involve her parents would be unrealistic. (Sighs) So that's really why I had to create her dad…and grandmother when she shows up! ^_^

Ultrra: So now that we kinda digressed, what where you saying about the Koopalings?

Alice: XD Oh yeah! Everyone wants to know when they show up and hope for no OCing/Mary Sueing their characters. O_O I guess I just never read enough stories with the koopalings to see that Lemmy acts like this or Roy acts like that. Hmm…I know that everyone will like/appreciate how I wrote Ludwig though! I haven't seen his character written like this before! ^_^ Haha!

Ultrra: Also one dessert review asked 'When will Daisy reciprocate Bowser's feelings!'

Alice: LOL! Oh yeeeeeah! XD Okay on a scale of 1-10, 10 being super obvious, I think Bowser's 'come-ons' to Daisy are a 12! Lol! XD

Ultrra: (snorts) Like a 13…

Alice: (smirks) But since we get to see all of Daisy's vulnerabilities we can see how even in the face of obvious come-ons, she doesn't take him seriously. Also, has someone ever said, 'Wow you look nice today?' And you're like 'Thank you,' but totally don't believe it? Their relationship right now is like that! X)

Ultrra: It's obvious to me Bowser's after her but to a tomboy who is unused to such direct affection, she's clueless?

Alice: Yes! Exactly! XD

Ultrra: So the million dollar question is…will romantic progress ever be made!

Alice: You know, I have read stories where two characters fall in love on…chapter three XD lol! (Whispers) And then do _stuff _before like chapter five! O_O Nooo! Real love shouldn't be rushed! So you all must be patient because their budding affections will have to go through way _more _challenges. ^_^ Like this chapter O_O But on another note, I think a big hallmark will be made this chapter! ^_^

Ultrra: Ooh! Sounds interesting!

Alice: Haha! Also later in this chapter, Bowser will tell Daisy about some of his koopa culture come-ons! Lol! You can go back in the earlier chapters to see how many times King Bowwy's 'come-on to her! XD Lol! Or you can look for it in this chapter and future ones! XP Anyways do enjoy!

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><p><strong><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>**

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>It was a whopping one hundred and ten degrees in Sarasaland and there was no way I was going out into that <em>insanity<em>. So to avoid sunburn, _cancer_ and _death _I dodged the heat like the plague. I remained indoors sitting at my desk and leafing through penpal mail.

I received my usual mail from Wendy, Junior, Toadette, Lulu, and interestingly enough a letter from Mario. Wendy's letters complained about her lack of a love-life at her all girls' school and the _world-ending_ shortage of cute boys in her life.

_Blah, blah, blah_.

Then there were the beauty tips included so I could, 'keep up my new prettiness.' Junior's letter was about his misadventures in school and he included another darling doodling of Me, Bowser and himself.

I laughed at Junior's artwork. This time it was a picture of us playing soccer together. The stick-figure Bowser had furrowed red burrows, yet he was smiling and showing off sharp teeth.

Doodle-Bowser held 'me'. My character had rosy pink circles for cheeks, red lips and blue dots with eyelashes. I framed the picture and set it on my wall. There was a second drawing with him and...Toadette?

Both stick figures held hands with misshapen hearts floating around their heads. I laughed; Junior's letter begged me to send the picture to Toadette. Speaking of the heartthrob herself, Toadette's letter asked about my life in the palace.

She told me how pretty I looked at the soccer game and apologized for how rude their team had been that game; I shook my head, I wasn't even mad at Toadette! She's such a sweetie. And I all but laughed when her letter asked about Junior.

So there _was_ something going on between the two little cuties eh? _Bowchikabowow. _Well three letters down and two to go.

Luigi's letter was sweet stating I 'blew him away' at the soccer game. In the letter he referred to me as 'The mysterious goddess'. He claimed during half the game he was too busy looking—no drooling over me to concentrate.

He was angry about Mario's slide-tackle and so was the rest of the Mushroom Magic. Luigi's letter finished by begging me to visit the pipehouse. I'll have to do just that too; Luigi's ravioli was to die for! And their Italian soda they had imported was sweet and delicious.

The next letter was from Mario. _Heh, this ought to be interesting._ He was deeply apologetic about the slide-tackle. That's great but my knee still had to be iced every night before bed. Granted I was off crutches but I could still feel its unhealed soreness.

He apologized again and again for losing his head and still wanted to be my 'bro' and I'd still be his 'sis'. He let it be known Peach was furious and he was 'hot water' with her.

I lowered his letter and grinned to myself; it was hard to imagine Peach angry at someone but I bet it was _friggin' _scary when she was! Peach was long-tempered and good natured; not even having her Kingdom invaded angered her. I could recall _one _time when I've ever seen her angry and it was like the apocalypse! Her blue eyes blazed a hellish red and her manicured smile had nothing but fangs and sharp incisors.

_Oh yeah, I'd rather cross Bowser than Peach. She was Satan in red heels when she was pissed..._

Hmm.

After writing back to all my pen pals, I searched through my mail bag and frowned; where was Bowser's usual letter he would have sent by now? We both used the Sneaksheet to write funny little tidbits to each other throughout the week but receiving and sending mail was always more fun because you could open it!

Halfway through the week he would send letters or notes inquiring when I'd arrive for our weekly visits. That way he could have his chefs prepare dinner and he'd have some idea when he should clear his schedule for my arrival.

I tapped my chin thoughtfully; I wonder if something happened in the Darklands? Or was he super busy this week? I haven't heard from him _all _week.

Hmm, how weird...

A toad stuck his head in my room, "Princess? The emperor requests to see you before your departure."

"Ah, thank you."

I'm nearly done packing so I can just finish after father speaks to me. I looked at myself in my vanity and smiled. After spending so much time at Bowser's castle, wearing my yellow royal gown was starting to feel foreign.

I walked through the hallways until I reached the throne room. A servant toad opened the door and bowed. I gave a curtsy and walked in. Looking effortlessly sophisticated, Emperor Sakuro was ever the epitome of grace. With his chin propped up by his arm, Father watched me approach. Under his watchful eye, I nearly stumbled and ate it.

_He has a really piercing stare. Like he's looking into your sooooul._

I stopped, curtsied and sat daintily. A Sarasalandian princess should weigh next to nothing and therefore shouldn't make a sound. Father's expression remained stagnant but he did fold his hands together, "Princess, soon you shall leave for your business in the Darklands."

"Yes Emperor."

"Before then, we of the Sarasaland Court would like to address our great pleasure. We are pleased with your progress."

I looked up surprised, "Heh?"

Although his face was completely neutral, his ice-blue eyes were brighter, "I have been reviewing the kingdom's financial progress with the council and we are quite satisfied with the new growth to our economy."

I smiled, "Really?"

"Indeed princess," father unraveled a scroll, "Your work has been exceptional. In your few weeks as an envoy to the Darklands, we have established three new large irrigation systems and opened several new trade routes in at _least _five kingdoms."

_Yahoo! Go Daisy! Go Daisy!_

"It is my greatest pleasure to serve our kingdom," I spoke softly.

On the inside I was turning flips and popping off champagne bottles.

Father looked up and neatly closed the scroll, "I am proud of the sacrifice you are making for your kingdom."

I blushed hard; all this praise was overwhelming. Was my father, the stern Emperor Sakuro complimenting me? It was unreal. Just then he rose from his seat and walked over. A strong hand was set on my shoulder.

The lightest vestiges of a real smile appeared on his face, "As your emperor I am pleased with the effort and dedication you have shown, however as your father I am honored with the level of maturity and grace you have shown."

"Father…" I whispered, truly touched by such strong words.

"Throughout your journeys to the Darklands I have requested King Koopa to keep me up to date with the commerce proceedings," father spoke, "And each week I have received a detailed report of your workmanship."

"Truly?"

_Stars, what could he say!? 'One day we went to a carnival and played games together'!? Not really worthy of the praise Father's rewarding me with..._

"Yes and I have read King Bowser's letters about your trade dealings and the way he describes your work ethic…" Father shook his head, dark sheet of fringe obscuring his face in the process.

His glacial blue eyes tightened as he stared at me, "It is astounding. It seems the sovereign of the Darklands is…_infatuated _with you. He speaks of how much of a wonder you are and how you've made him believe in the good of humankind again."

I smiled; Did Bowser really feel that way?

Father's expression tightened, "Sometimes I wonder myself if Lord Bowser is…indeed enamored with my daughter...?"

Father stared at me intensely, eyes critically scanning the length of my face. I blinked, stunned; was he trying to force an answer from me!?

W-Why was he looking at me like that!? Bowser doesn't like me!

I blushed under his severe stare, "K-King Bowser...liking me!? N-No of course not father! That's ridiculous!"

Father stared for a moment longer before reclining comfortably into his throne. The unusual intensity was gone and he seemed settled, "Very well then. Please continue your admirable work my child."

Still shaken, I bobbed my head stupidly, "Y-Yes father..."

"I also have one more matter to speak of. In three weeks time the council and I thought it would be best to present our princess properly to the rest of the world. We shall hold a _Sumanni_ as an awakening for you."

I gasped; I was going to have a _Sumann_i?! It was a gorgeous Sarasaland ceremony that included dance, food and merriment to celebrate when a girl became a woman. In my case it would indicate my availability for marriage.

I watched as my father's long, elegant sovereign robes glided past, "That is one weekend that I as well as your kingdom, will need our princess present. The council will look into inviting every eligible prince, duke, earl, archduke, marquis, lord and royal within the nearest twenty kingdoms. Your _Summani _shall be a celebration remembered for the ages."

I bit my lip, "…Father?"

"Yes?" he spun to face me. He was already halfway across the room and I hadn't even known it. He was always so quiet; quite my opposite really.

"Am…I allowed to invite his majesty King Bowser?"

I sucked in a breath when father's eyes sharpened, "In a gesture of good faith, as new allies it's imperative to have him present."

Father was silent before he spoke, "In a gesture of goodwill? You think by inviting the King Bowser, we will present ourselves as more serious allies, is this your logic?"

"Uh…Yes?"

"Hmm," he turned and started to leave the room, "That is well then. I shall alert the council to prepare an invite for King Bowser…It's quite interesting how…_close _you two have become in such a short time…"

As Father swept out of the room like a breath of fresh air, I grinned. I threw celebratory punches in the air. Woohoo! Not only did I receive praise from Father but he agreed to let Bowser come! I better get ready to head out to the Darklands! The second I was sure Father was out of hearing range I ran through the hall and darted into my room.

I continued to pack, mulling over my thoughts. I'm surprised Bowser hadn't all but demanded I come to his castle. Hmm, was something going on at his castle?

Someone rapped on the door to my room, "Princess Daisy? Are you present?"

Mentally I said every single curse word I knew; outside my door was a noble woman named Angora. She was easiest described as thin and frail-looking like most noble women who ate ridiculous diets to stay alarmingly skinny. She had sharp feline features and wore complimentary makeup that stood out against her pallor complexion.

Although she was past her years of youth, Lady Angora was still attractive. In her maidenhood she had been beautiful in the likeness of a fairy or an elf; tall and pale with sharp, angular features and stunning icy eyes.

And just like the councilman Salini, she was another person I couldn't stand. People always generalized that no one could hurt a woman the way man can but I vehemently object. Angora was one of the highest ranking Sarasalandian noble women and that meant she groomed me into the princess I was.

Born the daughter of a wealthy archduke, she was ever the proper lady and became a masterful harp player, pianist and cellist. As the embodiment of all these things feminine, it was Angora who had been hand-selected to raise me into becoming 'a proper Sarasalandian princess'.

I should say the term of becoming a 'proper Sarasalandian princess' simply meant that I would be subjected to all kinds of levels of hell. Even though I had always been scrawny as a child, being a Sarasalandian princess meant I had to appear ultra-thin and I was never allowed to eat my fill.

My thirteenth birthday was when Angora deemed me old enough to start learning 'proper ladylike behavior.' From that point on I wasn't allowed to play outside save for sports matches. I would sit beside her, drinking fruit teas and consuming tart pastries that wouldn't ruin a lady's figure.

Grooming was probably the lowest of the low. It was self-effacing how we would spend too many hours trying to correct all of my 'natural erroneous' traits. For hours a chambermaid would tug at my hair, using chemicals and herbs to straighten my hair into submission all the while another servant would use creams and potions to attempt lightening my naturally dusky complexion.

And all the while I went through hell, trying to be transformed into this girl I wasn't, Angora had watched it all with a calculating silence. Every magazine I looked at was a beauty magazine that celebrated women who looked nothing like me; tall, skinny and compiled with miles of fair flaxen hair and skin like a glass of milk.

In the process of this transformation, Angora would sigh dramatically and wonder what _ever _could she do to beautify such an unlucky girl like me? Perhaps if I had been born with my father's regal complexion I could be beautiful.

Another rap on the door followed and with a sigh I replied, "Come in."

Elegant, tall, and slim Angora floated into the room like a wintry breeze. In a room embellished in golds, creams, and oranges, she stood out in her blue dress like a lily among the roses. After surveying my room, her cat-like eyes honed in, scanning me from head to toe for any kind of blemishes.

Once she saw I was to her standard, she must have remembered to greet me, "Morning Princess."

"Good morning Lady Angora."

"It is a good one, isn't it? I've been informed you were going to visit the illustrious King Bowser yet again."

"I usually travel to the Darklands on Fridays."

"Well met. However while visiting those of a different culture, you must represent Sarasaland well. Now allow me to see what clothing you plan on wearing."

_Well, I know what's not going to go well…_

I sighed, watching as she glided over to my suitcase. I had nothing packed but plain tank tops, shorts, and the most unimpressive underwear like sports bras. Angora opened the suitcase and scanned the items wordlessly.

To be honest she did well to hide her disapproval at my clothes selection; the only thing that gave her away was the slight twitch of her upper lip. I watched as her perfectly manicured hands closed the suitcase before she turned to me.

Angora pinched the bridge of her nose and released an exasperated sigh, "How would I know you would try such a thing!? Princess unless you plan on playing nothing but sweaty sports then you are quite ill-prepared. We must dazzle such an important ally for Sarasaland's future, we must enchant them. And yet you dress to...play a round of _tennis_."

I opened my mouth but the futility of it was too obvious. No matter how much I argued, Angora would have her claws in all of my business.

"From now on I shall personally see to it that your luggage is stocked with nothing but the finest of your wardrobe. As you have done your best obtaining the Darklands as an ally then I shall do my best to make you shimmer like a star. Now you shall wait here, luckily I have a couple of stylists in my back pocket and we shall make you the epitome of glamour."

What she failed to inform me was that 'shimmering like a star' required several laborious hours of hair-pulling, makeup painting and dress fitting. It wasn't too soon when I finalized plans to head to the Darklands. I was garbed in a deep, ruby-red dress and hair done in an up-do that Angora said would 'distract the king into forgetting what's good for them'.

As I traveled through the hallways, the clanking of unreasonable stilettos filled the lingering silence. I left my room with Firefly, whose leaves fluttered happily as I picked him up and carried him in my arms, "Ready to skidoo Firefly?"

Firefly squealed happily, humming merrily as we traveled the hallway. The travel crew packed my things in the carriage as I fed Firefly his plant formula. Fiery happily fed from the bottle, downing the plant food mixture as if it would disappear within seconds.

"Slow down Fiery," I chuckled, patting his stem, "You'll make yourself sick like that."

* * *

><p>My carriage made good time and just as we were arriving outside of the palace gates, Kammy materialized out of thin air. I grinned and in the midst of waving a greeting, the unsettled look on her face made me freeze, "Princess Daisy! What are you doin—<em>ahem—<em>my ladyship, although it is rather nice to see you I'm afraid your arrival is rather…_inconvenient _for his nastiness._"_

I frowned, a bit hurt, "What? How so?"

"Umm," Kammy looked away as if thinking; wait a minute what's going on here? Kammy—who was always so rehearsed and professional in everything she did— was suddenly bumbling around on her words like an idiot.

My expression tightened, "What's wrong with Bowser? If he doesn't want me to visit then he must be dying."

Kammy blinked before she laughed wildly, "A-Absolutely_ nothing_! His Lordship is just_ peachy_. He is…urm, in the middle of business? Ha! Yes, he is in the middle of business!"

"He's always busy when I come over and that doesn't stop him from letting me in the castle," I whiffed, "You really _suck_ at lying."

Kammy turned away to mutter something disparaging under her breath before facing me again, "Princess! You can't see him because the king is simply…not...himself," she replied slowly.

I frowned with worry, "Aww, is Bowwy sick? I'd be more than happy to help the staff make him a hearty stew! We'll have him back on his feet in no time! Is Junior home this weekend? I'll teach him how to make a Sarasaland stew! Nice and spicy."

Grinning down at Firefly, I tickled his stem. The fire flower giggled, "Spicy stew sounds yummy, huh Fiery?"

Kammy shook her head, "For a change his lordship requested for Prince Bowser Junior to remain at his school."

What?

Ever since I've been coming over, Bowser has demanded Junior to return home every Friday. You know if I didn't know better, I would think Bowser could be using Junior as leverage to get on my good side…

Nah, that can't be…

"So Bowser isn't sick?"

"Not quite…you see," she sighed and muttered to herself, "You _would_ want one of them. This would be so much easier to explain to a Koopa girl. She'd know what to expect…"

"…Huh?"

"Er nothing, just speaking to myself," she laughed nervously, "_Ahem! _Well I suppose I can't turn you away after a long day's travel. I'll have the staff bring in your luggage."

Okay so I've decided two things; one, Kammy is a terrible liar and secondly something _was _going on. I rose out of the carriage, holding Firefly in hand. My garnet-red dress shone like a gem under the moon's bright glow.

Kammy raised her eyebrow ridges in surprise, "May I add by the way, I think you look marvelous if not a bit overdone."

Blushing, I nodded my head, "Thank you, a lady of the court thought I should dress...like an appropriate delegate."

"Odd, I'm quite positive King Bowser specified his preference of causal dress."

I sighed, "He did but Lady Angora is quite…_stubborn_ on wishing me to be the 'perfect lady'."

"Ah I see..." Something told me Kammy actually _didn't._

Instead of entering the castle through the main entrance, Kammy motioned to follow through a side entry point I had never known existed. Okay there was something definitely up. It was as if she was trying to hide my very presence here…

"Come, come along now Miss Daisy," Kammy hurriedly shooed me along, "We must make haste. Now, come."

We hustled, all but jogging through the halls—the _lesser_ employed halls I noted—as we continued on this secretive expedition. My building curiosity gnawed savagely as I tried to puzzle together as many scenarios as to _why _Kammy was being so enigmatic. I tried to fire off a round of well-aimed inquiries but she was adamant about keeping me ignorant of the situation. As we navigated through another dark, dim hallway manufactured of crumbling stone and mortar, one of the large stone doors unbolted with a rattling rasp and Kammy inhaled sharply as…

Kamek appeared.

His appearance must have been a deep relief as Kammy released a sigh of reprieve and visibly relaxed. The blue-clad Magikoopa halted, raising both eyebrow ridges when he saw us, "Lady Daisy? Well may I say first off hello and it's a delight to see you. Now then what are you doing here?"

I frowned, peering between the two MagiKoopa incredulously; _my Stars_ have these Koopsa forgot for the last few months or so I've been showing up here to meet with their King on business related issues!? Every_ single freaking_ Saturday and Sunday I've spent time with their King! And them too!

"Umm," I raised a skeptical eyebrow, "I'm always here Fridays. Come on Kamek you of all people should know that. Okay you know what!? I'm frustrated! What is going on here!? Like_ seriously!_"

Kammy growled, "Kamek! We don't have time to sit here and chit-chat! Who knows when _you-know-who_ could show up!"

I cut a sharp glare at Kammy; you know who? Who's you know who?! Kamek's face suddenly paled, "Oh Stars…We'd best get you to your room Miss Daisy."

"Why aren't you guys telling me _what's going on_?" I hissed as Firefly looked at us in curiosity.

I stepped passed the MagiKoopas and roughly threw the door to the next adjoining hall open. My waning patience fueled my rising ire as I snapped, "I_ swear_ when I find out what you two are hiding there shall be hell to pay! And I—_ouch_!"

My face bounced right off the hard plastron of a Koopa. Kammy and Kamek gasped audibly, Firefly squealed, roughly jarred from the sudden impact of my fall. I landed on my rear, seeing stars. The side of my face smarted painfully, throbbing and tender. Ugh, anyone get the license plate of that semi!?

I heard a deep snarl, "Why don't ya try to watch where the_ hell_ you're goin!?' If I was as_ puny_ as you are I wouldn't—hmm?"

I peered up and met the livid ruby reds of Bowser. He towered above, looming with a baneful presence and bared incisors. His brows were pinched over the bridge of his nose, eyes narrowed and throat glowing an ominous red-orange; if I didn't know better, I'd think he was ready to fry himself an extra spicy plate of princess!

He blinked, mind playing a quick game of catch up as he recognized me. I won't say that his expression became anymore friendly or less maleficent because if anything, his new grin was dangerous. The insidious smile slanted his glare even more as he spoke in an unusually smooth purr, "Why hello there_ Flower_."

He extended a claw, "Hey there Bowse—_Whoa_!"

When I took his hand, he yanked me onto my feet with less care and decorum than usual. With a yelp I staggered, tripping over the hem of my expensive gown. I ended up smacking flush against his plastron. My arms were wrapped around his middle in something analogous to an overly-friendly hug. With a rumbling chuckle, Bowser gingerly clutched my shoulders, smoothly lifting me onto my feet and making sure I had my balance before releasing my shoulders completely. We locked gazed and as he smirked in obvious amusement, I flushed outstandingly, "Uh…Thanks."

"Falling all over yourself to get to me huh?" he growled, smiling archly.

He drew back, studying my overdone dress and makeup with clear interest. I was surprised when he growled with an approving rumble, "_Damn. _You look amazing. I'd howl at the moon if I was a wolf."

"Thanks," I bashfully rubbed at the back of my head, "It was Lady Angora's idea..."

I blinked, realizing he was still staring with unusually intense interest. The fervid blaze of Bowser's stare couldn't be ignored. His burning eyes were so vehement, so powerful and was he_ purring_? He reached forward and lightly touched a clawed digit to my face.

"For a change," he growled, a lopsided smile cut across his face, "I'm with that court lady on this; you look absolutely beautiful. I could just..." this time a parlous snarl stole his voice, _"devour _you_ whole_."

"Uh...?" I gulped, peering up at him cautiously, "What...?"

He began to slowly move closer, eyes blazing as a loud purr poured over me. I gasped, tilting backwards as he leaned forward with a rakish grin. Kammy and Kamek scrambled into motion, darting between us. Bowser frowned, peering at them with ebbing patience.

"Y-Your majesty?!" Kammy gulped, "I-I thought you'd have several more meetings to be in until at least night fall."

"Kammy is right for once your lordship," Kammy shot Kamek an evil eye, "How is business progressing? You should be seeing the elders of the Smokelands burrow soon."

"We're taking a break for now but I have to wonder…" Bowser narrowed his eyes just the slightest bit, "what in the world are you doing in this hallway? No one uses it at all."

"A-All the more reason to use it your Ungratefulness!" Kammy blurted out.

"Hmm, you weren't trying to hide Daisy's presence in my own castle eh hag?"

He loomed over his adviser, an ominous grin spreading across his face.

"O-Of course not sire," she did that nervous pitchy giggle again.

"Good because I could smell her from miles away," he growled deeply, slowly turning to look at me, "It's like being in a field of aromatic flowers..."

I raised an eyebrow; since when did Bowser use words like aromatic? It seemed too soft and refined of him. Or just weird.

"Er…?" Kamek looked off to the side; apparently he noticed too.

Kammy snapped to attention, "Well King Bowser, we know how busy you are so we'll leave you to your work now. I must…er…help the princess freshen up from her travels."

Bowser grinned, slowly licking his chops, "She looks perfectly _delicious_ in my opinion."

Kamek and Kammy froze at the lingering look their king gave. Both of them seemed busy trying to communicate non-verbally. I raised an eyebrow at his weird behavior.

"Oh shut up _Bowwy_."

He growled, smoke rising from his mouth, "Oh I'll _show _you what I think of that stupid name. By the time I'm done with you, you'll be singing another tune..."

Bowser froze the moment he heard Firefly cooing, "Looks like you're taking good care of the lil guy."

The Koopa king lifted a large, meaty palm and stroked Firefly with surprising affection. Firefly soaked it all up, closing his eyes in bliss and even leaning towards Bowser's sharp claws. The baby fireflower purred happily under the king's touch. Bowser laughed with true mirth, "Look at this needy little bastard. He's kinda cute though….and—"

Bowser's snout hovered inches above my head at most. He surprised me with his next move; nearly pressing his entire maw against my red tresses when he inhaled the scent of my hair. He took a second generous exhalation and released a loud growl. I blinked, peering up. Did he just _smell _my hair!? I stared at him wordlessly, unsure if I should laugh or be offended.

"_Mmm_," he purred. When he opened his eyes, they dilated dangerously, "You smell sexy…"

I blushed, "W-What!? What is this!? Over-amorous turtle day!?"

"You want to see amorous?" he growled, grabbing my arm with a wicked grin, "Then let me show you my little desert chiffon."

I didn't know Kammy could move so fast because one moment I was firmly pressed against Bowser's plastron, peering into his boiling red eyes and wicked grin and the next, Kammy was suddenly dragging me across the palace, "W-Well! W-We'll be seeing you later Your Highness!"

"Yes now come along Lord Bowser," Kamek hovered above his ward, appearing just as frazzled as his female counterpart, "W-We must see to business now."

"Hmm," Bowser shot one last look my direction before he stomped after Kamek.

It wasn't much longer when we entered my well-furnished guestroom. I was greeted by the familiar aqua-blue adornments and subtle fragrance of freshly picked daises. Kammy looked uncharacteristically nervous as she fiddled with her scepter. I shook my head; between Kamek and Kammy's odd behavior and then Bowser's _forward_ conduct, it was maddening not knowing what was going on here.

"Kammy what's wrong with you? Both you and Kamek have been acting awfully nervous. And Bowser...well I thought he didn't have a filter before but now..._Yikes _man."

Kammy sighed so hard her shoulders sagged, "Well…truthfully Miss Daisy, I've been debating whether or not I should inform you of something…"

"Yeah? Like what?"

She sighed again,"Well all right then, perhaps you ought to make yourself comfortable princess. This might take awhile."

With a shrug I moved over to my bed and took a seat. I neatly tucked Firefly onto my lap and fixed my attention on Kammy. Geesh, it was about time she told me what was going on. Everyone around here was walking on Koopa egg shells. Kammy turned to look out the window, perhaps reflecting.

"I must warn you that tonight is the Koopa moon," Kammy spoke softly, as if afraid someone might be listening in.

"Okay so what does that mean?" I looked down at Firefly and poked him in the side. Firefly cooed in response and giggled.

"It occurs once every three years," she replied, voice sounding dreamy as if she were telling a fairytale, "And because of the properties of the moon…"

I laughed, "What? Does Bowwy transform into a werewolf? A wereKoopa!?"

I chuckled at the thought of Bowser howling to the moon and licking himself. I almost broke a lung laughing at the image of Bowser with a leg raised, licking himself like a cat.

Kammy frowned, "Lady Daisy this is a serious matter! You are potentially at big risk! The moon does not make him 'transform into a wolf' it simply manifests a Koopa's desire to find a mate!"

My laughter choked off, "_What?! A_ mate?_"_

Now instead of a howling Bowser, I pictured the king of Koopas at large as King Kong, crawling up the side of the empire state building. But instead of beating his chest, Bowser would probably be roaring, blowing flames as he clamped onto some blonde girl.

Probably Peach.

I crossed my arms and chuckled, "Heh, well that sucks for Peach. Is Bowser going to be trying to drag her off to his cave by her hair?"

Kammy blinked before glowering, "Oh merciful _Stars_ you truly are dense! You silly girl, King Koopa is going to be trying to drag _you _off by _your_ hair!"

"Wha?"

Me? Now my image of Bowser as King Kong altered. Instead of Bowser holding some nameless, wimpy blond, he was holding me. Yeah, if Bowser _ever_ tried to abduct _me_ and scale a building, I would give him the finger; none of that helpless damsel business here.

I frowned, "So what are you trying to tell me?"

"The Koopa moon is a seasonal breeding event," she adjusted her glasses in agitation, "As your people are in tune to the sun, we are in sync to the moon. Most of our emotions fluctuate unstably with the most unsound being passion, rage and desire."

She frowned deeper, "You _really_ chose one heck of a weekend to stop on through Missy. The Koopa moon turns even the most reserved Koopa into the most savage beast!"

Taken back by her sharp tongue, I raised my hands defensively, "Gosh…I'm sorry I forgot to double check my_ Koopa calendar_…"

Kammy sighed, "I'm sorry, it's just the moon and all…"

I twitched, "It affects you too!?"

"Not quite to the extent it affects the royal family or his majesty, but I certainly can get cranky like no one's business!"

The royal family huh? I wondered if Wendy was okay or what about cute little Junior? I frowned at the thought of them being affected terribly by this event.

"Are the princess and Junior okay?"

Kammy snorted, "Oh they're fine and away at their schools being pampered. On most Koopa moons the princess goes between bouts of extreme rage and sorrow. Junior usually has a terrible stomachache."

"Poor kids," I said softly, "I wish Junior was here so I could take care of him."

Well if I thought of the Koopa moon akin to a certain cycle that happens to most girls once a month, then I could say I know what the Koopa royal family goes through. After all it sounds like this Koopa moon thing drives them crazy as well.

"So, what am I going to do?"

"Removing you from the castle altogether would probably prove to be rather hazardous…" Kammy rubbed her chin, "The master is just a bit angrier than usual, you should be fine despite his short_er _temperament."

She moved until we were nearly face to face, "But if there's _ever _a time you feel the king is unsafe to be around, you must hightail it out of there."

"…How bad is Bowser going to be?" I asked.

Kammy shrugged, "Each Koopa moon is different. The worst he's been was torching anyone who even looked at him funny and the best scenario was when he had a really strange craving for takeout."

The magiKoopa sighed, "_Anyways_ the King will have meetings all night and I'm quite sure you would not mind having a meal in your room tonight do you?"

"If it keeps Bowser from going King Kong on me, then dining in is fine."

"Superb, I shall have arrangements made then. I will be no more than a moment, I will return with supper."

I beamed down at Firefly, "Well little guy, looks like it'll be just you and me tonight!"

Firefly's leaves shook happily as he nipped affectionately at my finger. I glanced out the window and towards the moon. The golden star hung in the star-speckled sky lazily. The moon didn't look any different than usual. It was a bit bigger but nothing out of the ordinary.

_Koopa moon eh...?_

With Kammy's return, the servants followed in tow, carrying our fragrant supper encased in sleek, silver Tupperware. They brought elegant china, sparkling silverware and a delicious petite cake for dessert. The servants worked nimbly and within moments a table was ready, the silverware was set up and together the three of us ate. While Kammy rambled on about her usual tasks around the palace, I took a mental vacation and thought about the Koopa moon.

* * *

><p>It was the dead of night when I abruptly woke in a frantic cold panic. A bursting stab of boreal frost rocketed through my veins and issued my once restful slumber into full alert. I shot up, breath ragged, body racked with ghostly chills and face drenched with sweat. Though soaked in perspiration, my face was bizarrely cold to the touch. I released a second shaky, shivering breath; Stars, what's wrong with me? My stomach was in knots and I quivered from an unknown chill.<p>

Though I wore a thin nightgown, the thick Koopa comforter should have been more than enough to keep me warm. And yet I trembled. I sat up and made my way to the bathroom on trembling, unsteady legs. I drenched my face with lukewarm faucet water, hoping to wash away the uncomfortably cold sweat and rising anxiety.

Why do I feel so unsettled, like something bad was going to happen? It was strong enough to even rouse me from sleep…Was it the Koopa moon? I peeled away the sheer curtains from the window, glancing outside. A gasp tore from my throat; the moon was massive, vivid and luminous with an eerie green luminescence, like the color of a ripe Koopa berry.

_I've never seen the moon such a bizarre color before..._

It was creepy, ghoulish but beautiful in a striking sort of way. Only when the pounding of my heart slowed did I decide to return to bed. I dried my face, smiling weakly at my unsettled reflection and as I went back to bed, I heard something. I glanced at Fireflly; he was deep asleep. In the darkness he glowed faintly, his radiance waning and waxing in tempo with his soft breathing.

I stepped into large, fuzzy house slippers and quietly opened my silver doors. Just as the doors rattled open, the unsettling noise grew stronger. It sounded like a low, rumbling, haunted sounding moan.

_Was someone in pain?_

I moved cautiously through the dark hallways, fingers sliding unsteadily across the wall for balance. Everything would have been completely pitch-dark if it wasn't for the scattered torches. I had never traveled through the palace this late at night. It seemed sinister, eerie with the way the shadows slipped and slithered under the dancing torchlight.

The towering Koopa ancestor statues that were once beautiful and unique during the day were now terrifying in the night setting; night's blanket must have played upon the imagination's fear as each of their visages morphed into something far more fierce and cruel.

I gulped, swallowing hard against the lump in my throat as I continued to aimlessly stumble through the ghoulish palace. As I slothed through the castle, the haunted moaning became louder and far more terrible than I could imagine.

I trembled, legs unsteady and hands shaking as I scaled closer and yet I knew I couldn't turn back now. I had to find out where that awful noise was from. The pained Koopa was growling, roaring in earth shattering reverberations. My brows scrunched together; _was that Bowser?_

The deceptively beautiful, haunting apple-green effulgence of the Koopa moon seeped through the hallways like liquid. I stopped at a stone door and took a deep breath before slipping into the brisk night. I quickly darted behind a towering fountain statue and stayed as low to the ground as possible. Boy I'm pretty sure I looked absolutely foolish like this; on my knees with my butt hiked in the air.

_Chalk this up as another proud moment for the princess of Sarasaland..._

I stuck my head around the corner, remaining as quiet as possible. From what I could see, Bowser was splayed on all fours, surrounded by panicky, jittery-looking staff and guards. All of them looked far too nervous tending their king as if they were expecting the worst. The Hammerbros brandished mallets and Magikoopas had their wands trained on him diligently. I realized the Magikoopa were actively pinning him to the ground with their magic, restraining him.

Some of the servants murmured soft words, others wiped away the accumulating sweat from his furrowed brows. Bowser's eyes were squeezed shut, teeth gnashed and body rattling unsteadily from labored breathing. A slick of sweat dotted his hairline as he released another soft, pained groan. Something about him looked different; his horns seemed longer, claws sharper.

A thought crossed my mind; is_ the Koopa's moon transforming him...?_

Dark ribbons trailed down his biceps and pooled underneath him in a black river. _Was that blood? _Bowser grimaced; eyes closed tightly and when he turned his head, I saw a dark thread of blood leaking from the corner of his mouth. I retreated closer to the statue least he see me.

_What's going on with you Bowwy?_

"M-My lord, I'm so sorry we had to hurt you," was Kammy crying? I couldn't see her face since her back was to me, but her voice sounded thick with emotion.

Kamek was unusually stern-faced, "Kammy don't be ridiculous, I cast the spell. I hurt Lord Bowser. I had to stop you my liege or else..."

"I know," Bowser groaned, eyes still closed, "and I told you to do everything in your power to keep me from becoming…_that_. Heh, that spell actually hurt. Hell that wasn't too bad old timer; pretty good shot. I think I won't try anymore rampages at this point."

Kammy laughed throatily as she sniffled and with a wave of her wand, she procured a lace hankie. She dabbed delicately at her eyes, "You're such trouble Lord Bowser…just as your father was."

"Don't compare me to…" Bowser snarled weakly as his voice died off, "_him_."

"I know your lordship," Kammy softly ran a hand through his mane, with unusual warmth, "I shall never do that again."

"Good" he grunted, "Just...don't wanna be anything like that...monster."

As Kamek and Kammy continued to care for their ward, I squirmed, uncomfortable as my muscles began to ache painfully. My back was starting to protest so I sifted to lie on my belly. I froze when Bowser's head suddenly snapped up, startling the surrounding Koopa. Some of the staff toppled over from surprise as others jumped back.

Startled, Kammy and Kamek peered around to see what had bothered their ruler. Kamek frowned, "…Lord Bowser?"

I gasped when Bowser's attention quickly honed on me. Surprise lay bare on his face as he peered at me in a mixture of horror and fret. It was startling how feral his eyes were now. They seemed to be an even brighter, more malignant red and his pupils were slits like those of a serpent.

"D-Daisy...?" he breathed softly; coupled with his pained look, my heart poured out to him.

"Bowser," I whispered softly and slowly rose to my feet. I was surprised, even slightly hurt when he turned his head away. Why did his face look something akin to…shame?

He didn't have to hide anything from me…

I want to help him, just as he's helped me.

""Bowser..." I beseeched softly.

Princess?" Kamek blinked, appearing even more startled than before, "It's not safe to be out here—"

"_You foolish girl_!" Kammy suddenly snapped, "What are you_ doing_ out here?! Can't you see you're causing Lord Bowser more pain?! I thought I told you to avoid him at _all_ costs!"

"I…" I drew away from them, surprised at the unexpected flare of temper.

"The thirst is building," Bowser groaned, "I…I don't know what I'd do if I lost control and hurt her…but Stars she smells _delicious_."

It was obvious he was in pain and it forced out my compassion. I took another step towards him and Bowser visibly stiffened. I halted as he started to shake with tremors. The Koopa staff wiped sweat from his brow.

"Bowser?" I asked softly.

"K-Kamek w-why is _she_ here?!" his voice transformed from being dove-soft until it was a borderline snarl. His soft expression morphed into a terrifyingly murderous visage. Teeth bared, his voice became so guttural I could barely understand him, "I…I don't want her to see me like _this_!"

His features fermented, becoming more furious as his black pupils shrank, thinning to slits as he snarled and shook with rising rage, "_Why is she here to see me when I'm a monster_!? I DON'T WANT HER HERE TO SEE THIS!"

His voice was guttural, as his sanity was slowly slipping. His red eyes were wild, wide, livid and swirling with madness. His long claws dug through cement and gravel impatiently, as if wanting something more than a substitute for live flesh.

"Lord Bowser please try to calm yourself," Kamek spoke softly, "She does not think so lowly of you."

"Monster?" I frowned, "Bowser you're not…"

Sharp talons slashed wildly, dents engraved into the courtyard walkway from his wrath. No matter how much his staff tried to calm him, the king was fighting a losing battle. The pull of the Koopa moon must have been an alluring, maddening power. He closed his eyes as he trembled, fighting, trying to will himself above the monstrous tug of the Koopa moon.

"I can't…" he panted, eyes clenched shut, "control it…she's in my head. Her scent is driving me _crazy_. _The scent of a scrumptious, pure little minx_…"

Kammy quickly flew over, frowning heavily, "Princess now is _really_ not a good time to be here. I ask that you leave _now_."

"_GET HER OUT OF HERE!" _Bowser's roar shook the entire courtyard.

With that exclamation, he shot a spout of fire in the sky. Startled, I lost my balance, fell onto my rear and toppled into the water fountain. The water was freezing and I'm sure my stunt attracted _everyone's _attention.

"_Sheyt!_"

I don't think it'll take rocket science to get the Sarasaland translation of that one.

I shrieked, embarrassed and startled by the cold touch of water. I rose to my feet shakily, gaping down at myself. I was soaked from head to toe and nearly slipped again when I stood back up. Oh why is being clumsy such a chore?! Half of the staff went to help me from floundering around stupidly.

"Stars above, you all right Princess?"

"Let's help the lady back onto her feet."

Hands grabbed my arms and shoulders and helped hoist me back onto my feet. I shivered as the fountain water lapped at my knees, "T-Thank y-you…"

I realized I was receiving many lingering stares and soft gasps flooded the courtyard. I pushed my messy, drenched bangs out of my face. I peered around, noticing the dropped jaws and wide eyes, "...What?"

"M-My lady your gown…" Kammy's words died off.

"…This job has more perks every day," one Koopa troopa whispered to the next.

I looked down and realized my nightdress was completely drenched. It stuck to my body like a form-fitting glove and was utterly _see-through_. I could see my lacy pink bra and panties as easily as if I wasn't wearing this gown.

"Ah...?"

Oh my Stars, this _can't be happening to me_. I've done some seriously embarrassing things before but nothing to this magnitude. Everyone present could see my body _and_ underwear. My face burned hotly as I tried to cover my indecency. With bangs sopping in my face, I peered up at Bowser awkwardly,cheeks burning with blush.

"O-Oh my Stars…" I squeaked, arms wrapped around my torso, "T-This is _so _not happening..."

Kammy and Kamek both materialized in front of me. Kammy hovered in front, acting as a shield to roving eyes, "Erm..T-There is nothing to see here! Please carry on with your own duties—Kamek! Do _something!_"

"Uh…Yes...Don't look at the princess! Nothing to see! We can't see through her gown at _all_!"

Kammy glared at him, "Idiot..."

Gee thanks Kamek!

Bowser stared; wide-eyed and mouth agog. His eyes trailed over my wet, exposed form with fastidious absorption. My face burned redder when a thick glob of drool slipped from his hanging mouth. In a split second, Bowser clutched at his head and groaned, body afflicted with vicious tremors as he wreathed, convulsed and gnashed his teeth. Kammy tried to check on him, but Kamek held her back, fearing for her safety. He continued to shake and jerk violently; something was terribly wrong with the way his red eyes rolled into the back of his head.

When it seemed like the internal strife had ended, Bowser slowly rose to his feet, spiked gauntlets clanking together in an ominous rattle as his fists clenched. He stood perfectly straight and when I saw his eyes, my blood ran cold. His eyes glowed _completely_ white, narrowed in sinister malevolence. With a calculated motion, he slowly turned his thick neck in my direction, grinning hellishly as ribbons of drool slipped from his jaw. I froze, heart pounding wildly and eyes wide.

"Uh oh," Kamek whispered softly,turning to look at Bowser.

"_Mine_." The king growled, eyes slanting; his voice sounded wild, carnal, as if something else controlled him.

Bowser took a menacing step forward and grinned viciously, smacking his lips as several Koopa guards rushed to form a barricade between us. The guards clustered around their king, whose wicked smile was replaced with an infuriated sneer. With the bat of a powerful swipe, they were all sent flying into bushes and into fountains.

"You'd best run princess!" Kammy hissed.

"What about you?" I asked, keeping an eye on Bowser.

"I must stop his majesty," she spoke sadly, "It is what he would wish of me in his right mind."

"Oh yes," Kamek gulped, "I'm absolutely positive now that I'm not paid enough to do this."

"Go princess!" Kammy snapped as Bowser turned his attention back onto me, "Run!"

I dashed into the palace, ignoring the clammy, wet gown slapping against my skin. As I rounded a corner I heard a stone door crumble—as if it had been shattered into pieces. Bowser released a furious roar that shook the foundation of the castle. The turbulent thunder of encroaching footfall had me wishing I could run faster.

Bowser can run? I've never even seen him run—I glanced over my shoulders and shrieked. There was a thunderously loud explosion of shattering stone —probably a statue as Bowser suddenly appeared. He was livid, completely out of his mind as he pursued on all fours like a beast.

"_Succumb to me_!"

I was terribly outmatched with three of my strides barely equaling one of his. His eyes narrowed, fangs bared as he continued his mad dash. My Stars he was _salivating_.

A statue near my head exploded in a hail of stone as I cried out; he was gaining on me. _He was gaining on me!_ What could I do if he got his claws on me!? He was the mighty Koopa king and I was just a human girl.

Is this how Peach felt when Bowser chased her? Probably not since he wasn't trying to kill her. I continued to run through the hall, knowing he was gaining on fast. I could hear the thundering of his steps getting closer.

But I couldn't stop. Even as my lungs burned from exertion I had to keep running. I was growing lightheaded, fatigue weakening my strength and I did the only thing I could and barricaded myself in the nearest room. I locked the doors and moved away.

My heart pounded against my torso as I tried to steady my nerves. My hands trembled, sweat dribbled down my cheek as I regained my breath. Moments later Bowser's clamoring footfall stopped before the door.

As he sniffed around I held my breath and stood completely still, hoping to the Stars he wouldn't detect me. But my prayers weren't heard. He released a furious roar and rammed into the door with brute force. I backed away; what in the hell am I supposed to do?! Where's Kammy and Kamek? Could they even stop him?

Let's be real, it's only a matter of time before he managed to bust his way in. Even when he was joking around, I've seen Bowser lift at least three or four of his twelve-foot tall statues with a single hand.

With one mighty roar, Bowser bust through the cement door, stone crumbling under his might. Clouds of soot coifed in the air as he looked around, sniffing and when his sight fell upon me he grinned insidiously. He stomped forward, grin growing larger as his eyes narrowed with dark victory. I slipped backwards, moving away from him as fast as possible.

"_Mine_," his large tongue lapped at his lips as he salivated monstrously.

"Bowser please," I choked, staggering away from him, "It's me Daisy. D-Don't do this. I know you're there somewhere. Please listen to me damn it!"

His large hand darted forward and with a yelp, I dodged his grasp and toppled over. His other hand lunged forward and grabbed me. Massive claws pierced my shoulders and arms painfully until blooms of red spots appeared on my nightgown. I shouted and struck at him with all the strength I could muster.

My small fists bounced off his tough hide like nothing as he hoisted me over his shoulder with thoughtless ease. I screamed, kicking and attacking but nothing seemed to do. I froze when a single claw brushed intimately against the back of my thigh.

"_Mate_," he purred, licking his maw yet again.

A thick, wet tongue lapped gently at my cheek and he purred again, "_Mate. Mine."_

I blushed, "Wha? N-No! _No_! I am not your m-mate! I'm Daisy! A-A-And you are Bowser, my friend."

Without a second thought he dumped me onto the room's spare bed carelessly. The back of my head hit the bed first, neck crunching at an awkward, painful angle as I completed a backwards somersault. Stars scattered in my vision as vertigo slammed into me with the force of a freight train. Bowser loomed overhead, smiling down at me with foreboding jollity.

Though my head swam and vision suffered, I mustered up courage and dove away but he was quicker. He wrapped a claw around my ankle as his talons sliced into the flesh of my leg. With one sound tug, Bowser pulled on my healing knee. There was a squelching, wet _pop_ and my knee set afire with pain. I screamed in agony as he dragged me closer.

The throbbing, white-hot pain gnawed through my sensibilities like acid and I was barely aware of being flipped onto my back. I blinked at the ceiling, a cluster of hot tears making the tiles waver and blur in my vision. Bowser materialized above my head; magnificent and ominous at the same time; horns elongated, fangs glittering and glowing eyes impassioned and hauntingly cold in the same token.

I choked back a sob as he stalked closer with painstaking movements. He moved to my clavicle, pressing his snout against my clavicle and inhaled my scent deeply. My temperature flushed when his wet tongue lapped at the side of my face affectionately.

Bowser ushered a soft growl, clamped the shoulder of my gown in between his teeth and with one sharp yank, ripped off the shoulder and bared my neck. I gasped, squirming underneath him as Bowser licked, nipped and suckled my bared neck with surprisingly tender motions. I sobbed as my knee ached. What could I do to defend myself?

I did the only thing I could, and that was to utter a prayer, "_Helani illyah kurrahme_."

Heavens above help me.

"…D…Daisy?"

Teary-eyed, I peered up through messy bangs. Although Bowser's eyes were still completely white, he looked confused. But he looked like he was my friend again and not the monster who dragged me through the palace. Relief flooded through me as I sobbed harder, "Bowser you're _back_. Thank the Stars."

When I blinked my tears back, I could see the red irises as he peered down at me in confusion. He studied my eyes and saw the tears, "…You're crying?"

He reached a claw to gently stroke my face but then he pulled back quickly, noticing his sharp talons. He held his hands at arm's length, really studying his claws. He gaped in something akin to horror as one of his hands touched his sharp horns.

"Oh no…" he whispered softly, "_It _happened again…"

He must have put two and two together when he looked at me. Something about my expression made his face grow pale, "Oh no…I couldn't have…Flower? Did I…Are you…How could I…?"

His pained expression changed to surprise as he noticed my state of dress. The see through gown halted the Koopa king's claw and his face blazed red.

"…_Pink_?" he gulped, "I a-always imagined blue…"

"'_Imagined blue'?!_ You idiot," I wrapped my arms around my chest to the best of my ability, "Please get…Kammy."

"I didn't hurt you did I?" he asked softly.

I sobbed harder, "Just go get Kammy, please."

There was a sudden shift in the weight of the bed as he stomped away to retrieve his female advisor. Even when he left, his face was still a ruby-red.

* * *

><p>"How do you feel Princess?" Kammy spoke softly, waving a glowing scepter over my bruised knee. I could feel the magic seeping slowly into my bones, numbing the sharp pain into nothingness.<p>

In a fuzzy black Koopa robe, I sat on my guestroom bed with a cup of tea. I took a slow sip, trying to ignore the way my hands rattled uneasily. How did I feel? A giant, mindless Koopa king had been trying to kill me! I was almost tempted to snarl something sarcastic but I knew she was genuinely concerned for my welfare.

"My nerves are still shot but I'm doing a bit better." Even my voice sounded raspy.

"That's good. Is the pain tolerable now?" Kammy asked, "If I knew someday I'd be using my magic for healing, I would have studied far more extensively in the healing arts."

"My knee feels better, thank you Kammy," I smiled up at her.

She raised her jeweled scepter into the air, with the gem's color morphing from lavender into a soft emerald color, "Follow the light with your eyes.

It felt like I was in a doctor's office, following the light of her scepter as she slowly moved it from side to side.

"Everything looks just fine your ladyship," Kammy let a soft smile come to her face.

The light to the scepter dimmed as Kammy finished the checkup. Firefly was placed on my lap. He studied me with a worried visage, nudging his head against my stomach, fluttering his leaves erratically.

In one hand I drank my sweet Koopa tea and with the other I stroked Firefly's leaves with a soothing, placating touch. Firefly, who had a bit of a protective streak, had been terribly upset the second I walked into the room crying. So now my little plant was placed on my lap, and as I gently brushed my fingers against his stem, Firefly's eyes fluttered, head and leaves drooping periodically as he battled against the alluring lull of approaching sleep. Kammy made sure I had taken an herb that had helped soothe the pain in my knee. She magicked a spell to ice my knee.

Kammy's spell used an intricate rune, magicking the ice so it would never melt or freeze my knee uncomfortably. My nerves were still shot, my hands rattled against the mug after such trama; I had no intentions of being alone and though I didn't have to say anything, Kammy was astute enough to hover nearby.

"Princess," Kammy frowned, "I did not want you to have seen that side of Bowser. Being tainted by the Koopa moon is something we all cannot control."

"Yes…I know," I spoke softly.

"I have spoken to the king," Kammy said, "And as you can probably guess, he is terribly ashamed of himself. He values your friendship in words I cannot describe."

"I know he is," I could only imagine what being turned into something else felt like. Fighting against impulses that you couldn't control was probably very detrimental to one's ego.

"I have a question," I said softly.

"Yes?"

"When I came outside, why was he bleeding?"

"Heh," Kammy smirked as she crossed her arms, "One of the king's biggest trials is during the Koopa moon. It is as if his superb strength is a curse."

"A…curse?"

"Yes as Koopa, the stronger we are, then the more afflicted we are under the Koopa moon's reign. The greatest of our kings have been driven to the utmost depths of insanity and driven to do unthinkable things under the moon's dominion."

I listened enraptured, Kammy continued, "Since the day Lord Bowser felt his control slipping away under the Koopa's moon, he had me promise that the second he lost himself, I would do all in my power to stop or retain him."

She chuckled, "Apparently snapping His Nastiness out of his haze requires a great deal of pain. That is why Lady Daisy, he was bleeding. That's why I–well Kamek had cast a spell to snap him out of his bloodthirsty haze."

"So does the Koopa's moon make you evil?" I asked.

"No, it magnifies our worst traits nearly ten-fold," she chuckled, "Because King Bowser is indisputably the strongest Koopa in the land, when he goes on rampages its catastrophic."

Your worst flaws are magnified; so he was extremely bloodthirsty and wrathful, but what did that have to do with me? Come to think of it, if I was controlled by the Koopa's moon, what would happen to me? Maybe like Bowser I would be blindly furious?

Extremely envious perhaps? And maybe really clumsy to the point where I couldn't walk on my own two feet? Yeah everyone would be safe then if I went Koopa-moon on people.

"So I get why Bowser was furious and bloodthirsty but what did his rampage have to do with me?"

Kammy's glasses nearly slipped off her face from shock, "You _must_ be pulling my leg! Stars above! How much more _obvious_ must King Bowser be with his affect—directives with you! He chased you halfway across the castle sobering like a pooch and yet you _still_ ask _why_! One must wonder about the status of education in Sarasaland…"

I blushed, "W-well I'm just asking okay!"

"Well," Kammy cleared her throat, "As I stated before, King Bowser never wanted you to see that facet of his personality. He is deeply ashamed you experienced that. He would hurt himself before he ever wished to lay a claw on you."

I frowned, "It wasn't anything under his control. That wasn't him so he shouldn't be embarrassed for what he did."

I blushed hotly and crossed my arms as a thought came to mind, "But him _ogling_ me afterwards, now that he _can _own up to!"

With a sigh I walked to my large vanity and studied my reflection. My bright hair was a wild mess and my eyes were still a bit red. I brushed my hair down until it was semi presentable again, "Do…you know where Bowser is right now?"

I looked at Kammy's reflection in the mirror. She tapped her chin in thought, "Hmm, well if Bowser is still the same as he was as a child, then I would guess he was on the roof. It's the only place he goes when he is embarrassed of his actions."

"Thanks Kammy. And you're sure he's safe enough to be around?"

"Absolutely positive. The midnight hour of the Koopa moon is the most hazardous—as you learned firsthand—although his emotional meter may be shot," she laughed, "he's safe, just don't go around showing him anymore of that pretty flesh of yours."

I blushed, whispered a quick thank you then darted off to find Bowser. Kammy kept an eye on Firefly as I went on my search. I took the elevator to the top floor. There were eight hundred and fifty stairs in the Bowser's keep and no way would I walk up there.

I was greeted by the jagged rooftop and the ebony night sky. As Kammy foretold, Bowser sat near the edge of his glorious keep. The moonlight reflected upon his dark shell, making it glow. He sat with his face propped up by his elbow as he gazed over the large boundaries of his kingdom.

This was one of the few times Bowser was silent or even reflective. I approached quietly but the rumble of his deep voice broke forth, "…I know you're there Flower. So quit with the hiding already."

My cheeks flushed, "…How did you know?"

Though he didn't face me, I heard his chuckle, "You're downwind and very easy to smell, especially tonight."

"Oh…"

I stepped closer until I stood beside him. Even sitting Bowser was still taller. His expression was contemplative and melancholy. Normally he was so full of confidence and pride but the Koopa before me looked undefeated.

"Mind if I sit next to ya?"

He shrugged apathetically and I took that as my okay to join him. I sat beside him and looked over the kingdom. The glowing red pools of lava were kind of pretty against the pitch-black horizon. The jagged plain was a deep purple and the air up here was sweet and warm.

"I'd understand," I felt the rumbling bass of Bowser's voice, "if you'd never want to…come back here again. I wouldn't allow that to influence our kingdoms' new alliance at all."

"Hmm, well I won't lie and say I wasn't scared stupid," I laughed.

Offended, Bowser turned to shoot a glare at me; okay no more jokes because apparently we want to keep the atmosphere terse.

"I mean…I was scared but Bowser that wasn't you. And that event, the Koopa moon is something unique to Koopa. It's something you can't control."

"That doesn't excuse how I hurt you," Bowser's face contorted in pain, "I wasn't any better than those ninji…"

Okay now saying something that stupid actually pissed me off. How dare he compare himself to those scum. Bowser is still a great guy regardless of the moon's weird, freaky cycle.

"I believe a week ago a wise friend of mine said, 'I don't ever want to hear that shit again,'" I quoted him from our trip on his cruiser, "Those ninji were perfectly aware they were violating me but you weren't."

Bowser looked at me over his shoulder but didn't say anything so I continued, "Sure you're a massive Koopa with sharp fangs and devil-like horns, but—"

The king's heated glare stopped me, "Oh come on! I was gonna make a point!"

"Well make it then," he growled, his mane standing up defensively, "I already know I'm a monster okay? I really don't need to hear it from your mouth too."

"You're not a monster," I grabbed his arm, "I will _never_ think of you as a monster."

"_But I am_!" he roared, "Stars, Flower. I almost…I almost did something terrible. And yet here you are trying to convince me that I'm a good Koopa."

His body was tense, eyes narrowed to the point I couldn't tell if they were open or not, "How is an evil, tyrannical beast like me…going to _ever_ be good enough for a funny, witty, prett-no _gorgeous_ princess like you?"

I blushed at his praise as he continued, his voice wavering, "Flower, people flee when they see me, I know I'm hideous and cruel and I think you should too…"

His voice went weak and he suddenly turned his face away, "I _am_ a monster and I'm not as good as you want to see me as. You s-shouldn't care."

"You are a good Koopa! Friends stick with friends regardless of what happens and I know you did everything in your power to protect me. Even putting yourself through insurmountable pain."

I looked away from him and off into the dark horizon, "Bowser, I've never…had a friend as great as you. You can make me laugh, you are easy to talk to and you fight for me in ways no one has ever before. It's my turn to fight for you."

His eyes were glassy, inflamed with emotion. I couldn't look at him or I would cry.

"I don't want something stupid like this," I grimaced, "to ruin our friendship. Even though I can be condescending and sarcastic, I just want to let you know you're one of my favorite people."

"You mean the universe to me too Flower," he purred his words in a way that made my face glow.

I scooted closer until our knees lightly touched. Since he didn't pull away, I figured he was okay with the new contact.

"I don't ever want to hear you call yourself a monster again you hear, big guy?" I laughed lightly as I patted his knee.

"Well then I don't want you to ever call yourself a failure as a princess either," he looked at my hand on his knee before peering into my eyes.

He smirked, "'Cause as far as I'm concerned you're doing one hell of a job negotiating business here in the Darklands."

I blushed, "Oh you know I'm doing jack sh—_nothing_ for commerce! You're just being nice and fooling my kingdom into thinking I'm this studly negotiator."

Bowser chuckled, "Actually Flower I wouldn't do business with just _anyone_ who comes knocking on my door. Hundreds of kingdoms wish to do business with us since we're filthy rich and all."

As he spoke, he continued to grin sinfully, "I base who I wish to do commerce with on the personality of a ruler outside of business."

"What do you mean?"

Bowser crossed his arms, "I like to see what kind of person I'll be dealing with. I look at the way the ruler dresses, how they act and even under fire what do they do? Do they find a way around the problem or do they crumble?"

I slapped a hand to my forehead, "_Oh Stars_."

Bowser chuckled, "What's wrong?"

"If you base your judgment off of how the ruler interacts, then _why_ in the world are you doing business with Sarasaland?! I-I'm abrasive, clumsy, messy, and short-tempered. Oh and I dress like a pampered princess."

Bowser shook his head, "So you're asking what I see eh?"

"Yes! What makes me a good business associate with his majesty King Bowser?"

As Bowser studied me, he stroked his chin with a raised eyebrow, "You've shown yourself as courageous, gutsy and flexible, if something doesn't go your way you look to fix the solution to the best of your abilities."

I blinked as he continued, "While you are energetic and fun-loving, you know when it's time to get down to business. You take risks when you have a feeling that the odds are slanted in your favor but you're cautious enough that your adventurous spirit isn't a shortcoming. Your resilience is admirable but your self-doubt is your biggest enemy. You always second guess yourself."

I blinked, "Wow, feel like I just got my palm read or something. So you got all of that from us going to a school carnival and playing soccer?!"

Bowser chuckled, "It's always better to observe a person when they aren't doing business 'cause then you can really see their true colors shine through. If your subjects are half as wondrous as you are, then I'm more than happy to do business with you Sarasalandians."

"Bowser…" I smiled softly, truly touched by his praise.

"Hey I'm just tellin' you the truth." He grinned, nudging my elbow.

"So," I sighed, "Is there anything I should know about you? You know one hundred and one things about me apparently."

"Huh? Like what do you mean?"

"Well we're friends right?" I chuckled, "Any pet peeves to avoid?"

"Pet peeve?" Bowser scratched his head, "I don't have any pets named that…"

"No," I laughed, "Not a pet! It means like, things that annoy you."

"Oh! Then you should have said so," Bowser grinned, "I got an entire list of things that annoy me: Mario, bad food, idiots, Fawful, cheap Koopa beer, Mario, weekly meetings, when someone interrupts me, being called Bowwy, Mario, Fawful, having my tail stepped on, being stared at in the wrong way, drinking lukewarm kerokero colas, Mario…"

I laughed, "Okay, maybe I should have specified. There's clear differences between us and that can lead to misunderstandings, I'm human and you're a Koopa…so…"

Bowser laughed, "Like seriously! _You_'_re _a human! _Wow_, I never really noticed that! What's next? Are you going to tell me that you're a _girl_!"

"Ahem!" I laughed, "So since we're two different races, maybe you should tell me things I should know. Like things that are offensive? So I could avoid doing things to offend your culture."

"Hmm," Bowser tapped his chin smirking, "Okay then. Offensive stuff…?"

"How about pulling your tail?"

Bowser chuckled, grinning slyly, "I'm not sure Flower if that would be something I'd hate."

"It's not offensive?" I looked surprised, "Really? Seems like it would be…"

"Nah," then he grinned, "But it is a come-on."

I blushed, choking as he laughed, _"See_! It's that kind of stuff you've got to warn me about! What if I did that to some other male Koopa?"

Bowser's smile erased before he growled, "Then if that happens, I'll kick his pathetic shell all the way from here 'til the Mushroom kingdom. Then we'll see just how much he liked having his tail pulled."

I laughed, "How in the _world _is that even a come-on?! Okay like what would the human equivalent of tail-pulling be? Kissing?"

"No, it's not that important. It's the same as…Holding someone's hand?"

"Okay," I nodded my head, "What else?

"No purring," Bowser grinned at me, "That's the same as a catcall."

I laughed, "That kind of makes sense actually! Same thing with growling?"

"Oh no," Bowser was still smirking, "That's _way_ dirtier."

Well a growl was meaner than a purr, so again that kind of made sense. But then again, it's not like humankind uses growls and purrs in everyday speech anyways.

"So what else can't I do?" I smiled, "What about your horns? They're huge! No Koopa-stuff involving your massive horns?"

Bowser looked completely amused, "One measure of a Koopa's masculinity and fertility is how large his horns are." He made a subtle look I should have caught or maybe I should have heard the purr that entered his voice, "Why don't you touch them?"

While Bowser bent his head, I softly stroked his horns. They were as long as a human's ulna bone and they were pearl in color. I hope he hasn't gored anyone with these massive things, "So…then you must be seen as _uber_masculine."

"_Mind-blowingly_ masculine," he was grinning, eyes shining.

"Your horns…they're beautiful," I spoke softly.

"Why thank you," oddly enough Bowser was purring loudly, eyes closed; he must really be enjoying this, "Also, when a female fondles a male Koopa's horns it's a blunt, direct invitation."

"Invitation to do what?" His horns were far smoother in texture than I thought, it felt like ivory. I wonder if he has to clean them or anything. Or maybe he has his servants do it for him?

I barely heard the soft, rumbling chuckle from Bowser. He took my hands within his scaly palms, staring at me intently. I was surprised at the flagrant purring seeping in his voice, "To take her right then and right there."

I gasped loudly, body going rigid with horror; my brain must have frozen because suddenly I couldn't think straight. I'm sure my eyes were wide from shock as I stared at the rather smug, smirking king. I couldn't decide if I wanted to shriek girlishly or go running for the hills.

I had been…

I had been…

My cheeks blazed as he smirked roguishly. I opened my mouth to stutter more incoherent words but Bowser wrapped an arm around my shoulder.

"Don't worry about it," he was laughing now, "Your utter mortification is all but slapping me in the face, so I think I—the grand, handsome, _merciful_ king—will let it slide…_only_ this time. But if you make such a _bold _come-on like that again I can't keep any promises. A Koopa only has his limits you know."

"_Gee_ thanks."

I laughed and shook my head. He chuckled softly to himself as I leaned closer into him. I was glad that the awkward air between us had dissipated. That's how it was with Bowser; tell a few awkward jokes and then we both felt better.

Knees still touching, I looked up at him with an impish grin, "I didn't know the king Koopa was so in tuned with emotions. You did call yourself merciful after all."

"Reading emotions you mean," he snorted, "Don't try and make me sound like an uber sensitive shell or something."

I laughed, "Well we wouldn't want that now would we!"

"Heh," he reached an arm around me and pulled me closer as I beamed up at him.

"Yeah you are definitely a special person of mine," I looked up at him.

"You are too Flower. I don't know how to say this without sounding like a soft shell but…I care for you deeply and…I'll always want to be your friend."

I looked at him, really seeing his sincere expression. I melted at how shy and sweet he looked, "I'll want to be your friend too Bowser and you're not a 'soft shell' it takes a real Koopa to admit his most personal feelings."

I sighed before I looked at the blackened horizon, "I cherish our friendship and hope I'll always have you by my side."

A moment of silence passed and from the corner of my vision I could see Bowser's odd behavior. Varied expressions would flicker over his face; one moment he crumpled up his face, then the next he shook his head, then he slapped his face into his palm.

I wonder how long this would go on for…

Was he having a heated internal debate or did he have really bad gas. His face glowed a bright shade of red when he realized I had been watching him, "Erm..."

I laughed, "What is it Bowser? You look awfully flushed. The moon isn't affecting you again is it?"

"What? Oh no, it's not the moon this time…I was just thinking about_ something_…" He looked away, scratching the back of his head.

I laughed, "Like…?"

If possible he looked even more mortified, "W-Well..."

"Yeeeees?" I was grinning; after that horn thing, it's time I turned some of the embarrassment on him, "Yeeeeeeeeeeeeees?"

"H-Honestly?"

"Yes honestly."

"W-Well…It's just that…" his voice cracked and he hurriedly cleared his throat.

"It's just what?" I grinned, goading him on.

"I t-think you're p-pretty," he spluttered out choppily, face burning red.

My eyes grew round, "Oh."

"Yeah," he spoke softly, "Y-You're cute. I mean like _real_ cute."

This time my face blazed with heat, "Um…thank you?"

Blushing, both of us looked away from each other. While he rubbed the back of his neck, my mind was reeling; oh Stars, he thought I was cute! I thought I didn't do too badly for myself, but it was something to have someone else tell you that you were attractive.

I wonder if this was the lingering effect of the Koopa Moon or something?

"Heh," he smirked, still rubbing at his neck, "Also I've got a kind of weird request…Well question really."

"What's that?" I asked softly, still floored.

"My dad used to tell me when I was a kid," he cleared his throat again, "that if you want something, you oughta just take it. I was taught that a King Koopa is entitled to take what he wants whenever he wants. But I think this time since it's so special…I'd rather ask first."

I smiled, "Sure, so then ask away King Bowser."

He leveled his stare before speaking, "Would…Would you let me k-kiss you?" he asked softly.

My head snapped around as I gaped, jaw-dropped; _What?_ Did he just really ask me if he could kiss me? I knew I had to be neon-red, even brighter than Mario's hats. I blushed under his warm red visage. Normally his red eyes blazed with intensity but now they were warm and melting.

My Stars, there was no self-righteous smirk or any signs of a crocodile smile. He was serious!

This was the same guy who was always so sweet, spoiling me rotten and selflessly wanting nothing in return. And even the way he defended me against my friends, I've never had anyone do that for me before in my life!

I won't pretend he wasn't flawed because he was riddled with them. Bowser was hot-tempered, arrogant, impetuous and believed the world revolved around his head. While he may have been cocky, even obnoxious, he was still hilarious and so caring. So a better question would be, why wouldn't I kiss him?

As I continued to gape, he turned to face me completely. The red of his eyes were warm like the dying embers of a fire and though he wasn't smiling, there was something about his expression that was soft, gentle.

Why wouldn't I kiss him?

Was it because he was a Koopa and I was a human? No, that didn't honestly bother me. Even though he is a different species, he's been kinder to me than most humans. I smiled at him; it was okay to let my guard down. If he was able to feel safe around me then I could afford to let my guard down around him too.

Besides it would be an innocent kiss right? Friends can still be friends and kiss.

I grinned, "Sure Bowwy."

He stared at me, quiet and appearing a bit stunned, "Huh?"

"I said yes!" I laughed, "Why do you look so surprised?"

"Because you said yes!" This made me laugh harder, "You're not afraid I'll hurt you?"

I raised my eyebrows, "Should I be?"

"No," he smirked, "But I'll make it the best kiss you've ever had." He grinned, "You ever kissed anyone before?"

I blushed a bit, averting my eyes, "Well, only Luigi…"

I jumped when Bowser exhaled a flame angrily; his fists were clenched so tight that his joints were starting to pop, "You _kissed _that green goober?! I _knew_ I should have killed him at the soccer game! It would have been quick and _clean._"

For a moment I allowed myself to be disturbed, "I'm pretty sure it's _not_ legal to kill someone during a game…"

"Well that's it," he was still snarling and even grabbed my shoulders a bit roughly. With his red eyes narrowed he spoke softly, yet his words held a predatory edge, "I'm going to kiss you so damn good you'll forget you _ever _touched that plumber! Now c'mere."

He growled before he leaned forward. I was startled at the sudden aggressive display and blushed, "H-how are we supposed to…you know," I squeaked, "_Do it_?"

Bowser looked startled before he laughed, "'Do it?' Wow Flower, I was only talkin' about getting a smooch and here you are so eager to drag me into your bed. Put on somethin' short n' lacy and I just might pity you and let you have your way with me."

I grunted angrily, face turning red as I smacked him in his beefy arm with a punch. And since he kept on laughing _obnoxiously_, I wailed on him multiple times before I stood up and turned to leave. As I strutted off towards my room, Bowser grabbed my arm and spun me deftly into his arms.

"Going somewhere? I think you owe me something." His ferocious grin only seemed to be made more demonic in the moonlight. His eyes were nearly glowing an iridescent white and his horns and fangs seemed to sparkle malignantly.

For a second I had the urge to pull away. But despite his blunt, crude manners and arrogance, he was soft and in an odd way sweet as well. I bit my lip, studying him a bit more.

"Come on my lil' desert flower," he purred, his face coming closer, "Give into me. Open up your pretty petals to me, I'll treat you nicely."

I thought he would hunch over but he encircled his thick arms around my waist and lifted me up. I gasped, meeting his sly grin. His eyes slid closed and he moved in for the kill. The moment our mouths met, a delicious explosion of warmth flooded my body. His mouth with all his sharp incisors and fire-breathing abilities was perfectly soft and gentle.

The kiss was for a few seconds but butterflies flooded my stomach and heat blazed in my cheeks. The moment he pulled away, I was red-faced and out of breath. Purring loudly, his eyes were hooded as he licked his lips, "Damn you taste good, Flower."

He suddenly launched forward, exuberantly licking my neck. I blushed, struggling against the pleasure. His tongue felt good against my skin. I flushed heavily both from being tickled and being pleasured. Wait 'pleasured?!'

Oh…oh Stars please take that to the grave! To the grave!

"_Bowser…"_ I moaned. Embarrassed I blushed at the involuntary breathy rasp. I cleared my throat and tried a firmer voice, "B-Bowser stop! Bowwy?"

With one last lick against my cheek, he pulled away with cloudy red eyes, "Damn that was fun. We have to do that more often Flower."

"Uh…" I flushed, not knowing what to say.

"I think as friends," he purred, grinning, "that along with hugs, kisses should be thrown in too eh?"

It was time to make the big Koopa blush for a change. I grinned at him mischievously, "Well, who knew that the big, strong, studly King Bowser purred like a kitten?"

Bowser's smile only grew more sinister, "Yeah? Well who knew the innocent, spunky princess of Sarasaland moaned in pleasure? I'll be hearing _that_ in my dreams for awhile. That and seeing the pretty pink lingerie you have on."

My face exploded with heat as he cackled mirthfully; Stars! I thought he was too 'busy' to have heard that! Damn! Damn! Damn!

"_Boooowser_!" I exclaimed completely horrified.

Also the lingerie thing! Oh my Stars, I was probably blushing purple by now. I tried to pull away from him, but Bowser, still smirking held onto me dutifully, "Oh come on Flower, I was joking. I get it, no more of that kind of stuff. Just know what happened between us stays between us. Friends keep secrets."

I frowned, averting my stare"Yes! B-But somethings should remain a secret even from you!"

His smile transformed into nothing but sin, "Like the color of your panties?"

My face flamed hot as he boomed with gleeful mirth. I wiggled and tried to pull away from him and his stupid, charming smile. I was so embarrassed, glaring at him angrily, "Okay. Now you can let go of me!"

"Too much?" he laughed.

"Yeah too much you jackass!" I growled.

He sighed, rolling his eyes, "Okay _fiiiiiiiiine_. I'll behave for you Flower queen."

Then I grunted, "...Also I only know two secrets about you. You hate being called Bowwy and you purr like a kitten. I need more ammunition on you."

"Yeah well tough," he narrowed his eyes, "But I've got tons of secrets about you Flower. You can blow fire, you're an honorary Koopa, you're clumsy as hell…well actually everyone knows that one."

"And everyone knows that you're a big jerk."

"Make that king of the jerks. But I do have a really big secret that you don't know about."

"Yeah?" I beamed up at him, "Won't you tell me _friend?"_

_"_Nah, I think I wanna keep this one secret for a little while longer," he winked.

I rested my chin in my hands, "Hmm, well next week I won't come to the Darklands."

"Why?" Bowser looked confused.

"I'll be having my _Sumanni_ in three weeks and I'll have to be there for all the planning," I grimaced at the thought of the upcoming night.

"What's a soo-man-eye?"

I laughed at his terrible pronunciation, "A _soo-mon-nee_ is basically a Sarasalandian tradition that announces when a girl has become a woman. The word itself means 'to blossom'."

Bowser let his eyes rove over the fur of my black robe, "Hmm isn't that ceremony a bit late for you? Your petals have already bloomed."

I flushed before I glared at him, "…I hope you'll _never _ever talk about my figure in that kind of way again."

"Who said anything about a figure? I simply meant that you have matured."

"I…" My face exploded into a red haze.

Bowser was smirking at me as I was content to blush stupidly and look everywhere but at him, "Dirty-minded princess," I heard him utter.

I ignored his smug face and cleared my throat, "Well this ceremony is simply a way for me to mingle with eligible princes, dukes, earls, marquess, counts, barons, and royalty."

Bowser glared, his attention snapping back to me poignantly, "Wait _what_?"

"My father can't be a ruler all his life," I laughed, "I'm going to have to be queen someday. Granted I can rule by myself but I'll also have to be able to produce an heir to the throne someday and well, can't do that myself."

"So this Soo-goo-lie thing is basically a way for you to go meet someone, then know who you're gonna bang with?"

I blushed at his crude word choice, I mean really bang! Yet again I hit him in his arm, "I am merely being introduced as Emperor Sakuro's eligible daughter so that I can be seen as an available lady."

"And you're okay with all this?" Bowser looked stuck somewhere between incredulous and angry.

"No, but what can I do?" I shrugged, nibbling on my lip in thought, "I'll eat, dance with a few arrogant princes, then have a dance reserved for my father and then…" I twitched, "I'll choose three top prospects and dance with them to show my 'favor' for them."

Bowser still remained frowning and suddenly he grinned, "If you want I can kidnap you that day…? So you don't have to be around those ugly, shell-less _losers_."

I laughed, "Why kidnap me when you can be there yourself?"

"Huh?"

I grabbed his massive hands and was only able to wrap my hands around two giant fingers of his, "I said you've been cordially invited to attend! After all we're allies now, it would be rude not to invite you not just as friends but as an alliance as well."

Bowser suddenly grinned. He tightened his hands around mine, "Well I suppose I _might_ decide to come along but only to give you some real eye candy to look at."

I laughed and tried to wrap my arms around his torso. I felt his chuckling echoing through his hollow shell, "Oh gosh. Well if you say so."

"It's starting to get late," He shot a quick look at the horizon, " and I know about your stupid human rules about ladies staying out too late and being called promiscuous or something dumb like that."

Bowser scooped me into his arms and began to carry me into the castle. I grinned at him, "Well thank you for respecting our stupid human rules."

"You're very welcome. But just know that my queen can be out as late as she wants."

"And why is that?"

"Since everyone will know that she's mine, no one will mess with her," he grinned evilly, " 'Cause if you mess with my queen then you've gotta deal with King Bowser's wrath."

"…Well you've sold me!"

For a change I didn't mind being hauled around. While we traveled through the castle, I didn't miss the way Kammy and Kamek suddenly materialized out of nowhere. They both watched us with content smiles before going about their way. Bowser dropped me off at my familiar silvery doors. He looked down at me with his normal mischievous smile but I could tell he was truly happy with the way his tail wagged.

"Now I'm gonna go before you try to tempt me to stay with your big eyes and long legs."

"You've over stayed your welcome, so go shoo," I pushed at his shell and shrieked when he turned around and tried to lick my hand, "Gross!" I laughed.

"Nighty my _noisy_ lil desert flower."

I twitched as my face heated up, "Nighty you shelled kitten!"

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><p>Alice: Reviews my prettieshandsomes! ^_^ (bows)


	11. The Summani

Ultrra: What's happenin' readers, reviewers and fans alike. (Raises the peace sign) Thanks for all your support towards Tomboy and the Beast. Today we'll—

Alice: (Steps out wearing a large red prom dress, holding roses and wearing a tiara waving to the crowd) Oh you like me! You really like me! (Holds up best fanfiction author award)

Ultrra: (Stares in confusion)…I knew it…She's become Malibu Stacey…

Alice: (Obscene crying) I…I have been given the award for the best fanficiton author ever! I…I wasn't prepared for this at all. (Takes out list)

Ultrra:…Not prepared my ass…

Alice: Ahem! I'd like to thank first and foremost my glamsquad which is **Elemental Queen** my stylist**, Inspired Girl** who does my makeup and hair, **Polya** and **MusicLover** who have been my trainers—all those hours in the gym together really paid off—then there's my publicist team of **Projekt-z**, **LadyCrysstal**, and **Mew I is Dinosaur**. Then my record producer… **James BirdSong**. And of course **23 Princess Ariana **for presenting the award…And my security team **BI0 **and **PirateChicka**. Whew! I think that's everyone... ^_^

Ultrra: (stares)

Alice: (Continues overdone sobbing)…I'm also thankful to…(evil smile and eyes glow red) _to utterly and completely annihilate all the little people who I had to step on to get here! _This is especially dedicated to my fourth grade math teacher! Eat your heart out! (cackles evilly).

Utrra: Yup, I don't feel safe right now.

Alice: Whew! Well now that that's taken care of (daintily sits down) We can take care of business.

Ultrra: Why are you even wearing a prom dress!

Alice: (Does coy hairflip) Silly UltrraShaddow, didn't you hear? I've been given the award for the best author on fanfiction and you will not rain on my parade!

Ultrra: Okaaay…but…what does a prom dress have to do with that award? Or a tiara?

Alice: Because this is my time to shine!

Ultrra: (Whispers) I'm just not getting a sane answer from her. (Turns to audience) Mental issues aside…This chapter is about Daisy's _Summani_. Speaking of which words like _Summani_ that are italicized are words of a different language, in case you guys and gals didn't know that already. ;)

Alice: Ultrra, should the tiara stay on the center of my head? Or should I tilt it forward? Which way maximizes it's glimmering shine and beauty?

Ultrra: (Ignores) Also in this chapter we will meet Daisy's Grandmother and be introduced to a couple of Koopalings. Since Alice is too…absorbed with…_herself _right now to explain the chapter, I will.

Alice: (On phone) Hi mom! Haha guess what? I received an award! I should _totally _call up my fourth grade math teacher and shove it in his face right? (Shrieks happily) See! I _knew _we'd agree! You got his number on speed dial!

Ultrra: During some of the dance scenes Alice recommended music for you guys to listen to! Pay close attention because for those dances, the suitors Daisy dances with then will be important in later chapters. Also it's cool 'cause you can listen to the music Daisy boogies down to! Just go to Youtube and enter the title/name Alice listed. The songs all belong to Nintendo.

Alice: (Poses in a mirror) I call this pose 'Not trying to be cute but is still cute.'

Ultrra: (Smirks) And now everyone knows she has issues. Enjoy the extra-long chapter. ;)

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><p><strong><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>**

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"So, what's the game plan this time?"<p>

The King of all Koopas was stationed in his luxurious personal office flanked by his loyal advisors. As the servants delivered drinks; a tall glass—a big, stone goblet for his royal masculineness—of Koopa liquor, Bowser reclined in his plush chair.

As he folded his arms behind his head, he reflected over the day. It was nightfall in the Darklands and after a long day of meetings with multiple councilors, overseeing the establishment of new boundaries and putting new melee weapons into trial, it was time to tackle a new problem.

While Kammy took small, delicate sips of her beverage, Kamek all but kicked back and downed his drink in one shot. Bowser hastily waved the servant off and the moment he was sure there was no extra set of ears, he began.

"Geezer, Hag," he only used his pet names for them when no one else was around, "We have one last issue to resolve for the day."

Kamek groaned, "Stars almighty Bowser, if we've said it once we've said it one thousand times! Today you looked gloriously badass shooting the bazooka!"

Just as Bowser was about to tear into his advisor, he thought about the words spoken and smirked, "While that is true, that's not what I was going to tell you Geezer. Use that tone again and I'll pound you into the floor."

Kammy shook her head, "Please forgive Kamek your nastiness, being an idiot comes with the price of forgetting himself."

Kamek squabbled angrily, causing Kammy to smirk viciously and before another of their infamous arguments could start, Bowser growled impatiently. These two old crones could flirt on their own damn time. This was Bowser time.

Yes, _Bowser time._

"Hey, I called this meeting because we got the upcoming So-gani to plan for!"

Both advisors looked at their king skeptically, "So-_what_?"

"Uh…you know, that thing Flower has at the end of this week?" he arched an eyebrow, "Big celebration…? Lots of loser suitors...? Quit being stupid and follow me here."

"Oh, you mean her _Summani,_" Kammy's pronunciation of the Sarasalandian word was spot on, "Lord Bowser what is it that you wish to discuss?"

"Did you guys research what the hell a Soo-many entails?" Bowser frowned, "I get it's a party…"

"We went on Koopatube and watched several different _Summanies,_" Kamek nodded his head happily, "They're really beautiful Lord Bowser! They are almost as extravagant as Princess Wendy's birthday parties."

"So this is going to be a high-end event, eh?" his red eyes narrowed.

"Absolutely," Kammy nodded her head, "And since this is Princess Daisy's _Summani, _it will be decorated beautifully, adorned with beautiful music and embellished with wondrous foods."

"Hmm," Bowser purred thoughtfully as he rubbed his chin, "So that means I have to look high-end. I mean I'm already sex twenty four-seven but I've got to push the boundaries. I want the best tailor in the Darklands to make some ultra badass armor! And a red cape! Red capes are heroic!"

Kamek frowned, "Isn't Mario's cape yellow?"

"Yeah 'cause he's a doofus," Bowser snarled, then he grinned, "So what say you advisory chumps? Armor and a cape? I want the princess to swoon when she sees me. I want her nearly orgasmic when I walk the hell in."

Kammy shook her head, "With all due respect Lord Bowser, we want you to show yourself as a suitor and…not as a conqueror. You are trying to woo a princess, not go to battle."

"The hell I ain't!" he frowned, even growling a bit, "I'm going to battle alright! Flower said there's going to be tons of _losers _trying to marry her! Not on my friggin' watch!"

"Trust me Lord Bowser," Kammy nodded her head, "then if you wish to obtain the princess' interest, we must dress you accordingly. I will have the finest tailor create a tuxedo for you."

"Tuxedo?!" Bowser recoiled in disgust, even going so far as to stick out his tongue, "I haven't worn one of those since I tried to marry Peach! I know I looked absolutely _sexy_ but a tux! Really!?"

Kamek hummed thoughtfully, "I agree Lord Bowser, you must wear a tuxedo. Tuxedos are very striking."

"Yes," Kammy nodded and then a sudden dreamy coo entered her voice, "Koopas in tuxedos are dreamy…"

Bowser and Kamek simultaneously snapped their heads over to look at Kammy. The female advisor visibly straightened up as her cheeks turned red. Kamek looked as if he wanted to bust up laughing as Bowser looked torn between being disgusted and mortified.

"_Oh flaming, falling, bleeding Stars no!_" Bowser choked out, "We are _not _living out any of your f-f-f—" Bowser could barely spew out the word, "_fantasies_!"

Kamek hid one last laugh, "Well Lord Bowser, we also need to decide on a gift for the princess."

"Hmm," he narrowed his eyes, "It'll have to blow everyone else's gifts away."

"The most expensive ring in the Darklands?" Kamek asked.

"Maybe…but I like how big you think," Bowser grinned.

"A new car?"

"A jet plane?"

Then an impish idea of buying expensive, lacy lingerie entered the king's mind. In his mind's eye he could picture Flower opening the gift and the resulting abject horror the moment she saw the lingerie. Her cheeks would glow that charming shade of rose and her blue eyes would grow wide.

Bowser chuckled to himself; _the look on her face would almost be completely worth it. I could handle her being pissed at me for a few days…if she decided to model the lingerie. Ah Stars if she did that, I _might_consider giving up trying to stomp out that wretched red plumber…_

"A new tennis court for her?"

"Her very own day spa built for her?"

"I think—" Bowser frowned as the daunting jingle of his cell phone went off. He checked the caller i.d.—won't _believe _the kind of crank calls he received—and turned to Kammy, "Patch 'em through to the room's monitor."

A television flat-screen popped up from the center of the table and turned on. After a few seconds of static, the screen cleared and the faces of two young Koopas appeared. They both shared the same shark-like grin. Secretly Bowser wondered if the I'm-going-to-kick-your-ass demonic smile was a family trait his children inherited from him.

"_Heya King Daddio!"_

Bowser groaned as he placed his face into his palm; Stars above it was the twins from hell, "Oh Stars, first Kammy's fantasy and now these two screwballs."

The faces of the twins, Larry and Lemmy appeared as they smiled largely and waved at their father. Bowser glared at the sight of his two mischievous sons; with these two, there was _always _something up. They only went out of their way to contact _you _when they had something planned for _you._

In most cases they were pranks.

"What do you two little punks want?"

They both puppy pouted simultaneously, "_Aww King Daddio why are you so cruel to us_?"

Larry dramatically wiped at his eyes, "_Must fight back the tears_!"

"_The tears of having a dada who doesn't love us_!"

"_Daddy! Daaaaddy!"_

They wrapped each other in a hug and fake cried obnoxiously. Since King Bowser was so used to their antics, his deadpan expression didn't change one iota. If anything his crimson eyes narrowed just an inch or two.

"You punks have ten seconds before I hang up…"

"_Aww King Daddio, why are you so mean_!?"

_"Just nasty for no reason!"_

_"Nas-tay!"_

"_We only wanted to talk to our favorite father_!"

"I'm your _only _father," Bowser grunted.

"_All the more reason that you treat us well_!" Larry chirruped.

"_That's right! Give us some r-e-s-p-e-c-t!"_

"_Find out what that means to me!"_

"Five seconds…" The king growled.

"_Well…_" Both twins glanced at each other and the unmistakable gleam of mischief sparkled in their eyes, "_We heard from a friend of a friend of a sister of a friend who now divorced this friend of a friend that you're going to a party."_

Bowser narrowed his eyes, "Yeah? And what of it?"

"_Whose party is it_?"

Both Koopas stared intently at their father and for a moment they actually unnerved him; when the twins were serious about something, they were nearly hell-bent on achieving what they wanted. Once, the twins wanted ice cream so badly they hijacked twelve cars, stole two rocket launchers, sixteen grenades, five bottles of laxatives, one blow dart gun and blew up five factories. Needless to say from that day on the twins didn't have to pay a coin when they wanted ice cream.

"A friend of mine…" Bowser spoke slowly, still deciding if it was wise to involve Flower in their madness, "…Her name is Princess Daisy."

"_Mushroomgoogle her_," Larry told Lemmy.

"_Righto! Mushroomgoogle power activate!"_

"Kamek, Kammy and I were trying to decide what kind of gift to give her."

_"What gift is better than a sexy Koopa?"_

Bowser laughed, "My thoughts exactly."

Lemmy must have finished his computer quest because both boys' attention suddenly turned onto the laptop. Their grins became nearly insane and Bowser figured an image of princess Daisy appeared on their screen.

"_Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!"_ Both teens shouted.

"_King Daddio_!" Larry grinned, "_She's hot_! _Like Ludwig's fire hot_!"

"_And ole Luddy blows some hot fire!_ _She's a major babe!"_ Lemmy even growled.

"_King Daddio, I can see why you're interested in this lady_," Larry wiggled his eyebrows, "_She's certainly a hot tamale_!"

"_Smokin'_!"

Lemmy threw his head back and wolf-whistled, "_Awoooooooooo!"_

"_I bet you'd even let her touch your horns!"_

"Wha—?" Bowser's eyes grew wide as he spluttered.

"_Ah ha! See!"_ Lemmy pointed as Larry guffawed loudly, "_King Daddio you're such a nasty Koopa, you naughty king you_!" And with that declaration the twins roared with laughter, choking on their own saliva.

"H-Hey!" Bowser snarled, slamming his fists against the table. To his chagrin, his body betrayed him as his face grew hot, "Y-You twerps better watch your mouths! Or I'll come over there and smash your heads together…"

The twins must have found his threat realistic as they stopped laughing on a dime. Larry grinned, "_So, can we go to this par-tay to meet the hot-tay princess_?"

Bowser laughed cruelly, "After everything you just said! You have the _nerve _to ask if you can go!? That's a massive hell no with a side of fries."

"_Aw come on!"_ Larry bleated, "_We heard you're taking Junior and Wendy with you_!"

"And that's because Junior and Wendy aren't idiot_s_," Bowser snorted, "Also they won't try to prank anyone."

"_Aww King Daddio we would never_!" Both twins spoke at the same time and made the same too innocent pout.

"_Besides we want to meet the princess_!"

"Then come home for a weekend," Bowser growled, "I won't have you two screw-ups…well…screwing up! She comes over every weekend to—"

"_Whaaaat_?" Both boys looked at each other then flashed their father a wicked grin, "_She comes over every weekend_!?"

"_You sly Koopa you_!"

"_I bet King Daddio has some moves he wants to show her."_

_"Put it on her!"_

"It's not like that at all!" Bowser growled, frustrated as his sons kept insinuating things that weren't happening, "We're just friends you miniature morons!"

"_Friends…with the bowchikawowow scene involved."_

" '_Just friends'! My Stars King Daddio, you're such a bold faced liar_."

"_Such a liar_."

They both looked at each other, "_Don't we know it."_

"_Liar, liar tail on fire_."

Bowser growled, "Well you brats can forget about going to Princess Daisy's party for sure!"

"_Aww come on_!"

"_We were just joking!"_

"Come home next weekend and then you can see her! Now good bye!" And with that Bowser hung up on his sons, who were busy laughing their tails off.

After taking a deep breath to collect himself, Bowser looked at his two advisors. Kamek looked as if he wanted to bust out laughing whereas Kammy hid her amusement a bit better.

"The twins seem well your badness," Kammy replied, face perfectly straight.

Bowser sighed, even massaging his temple, "They're both absolutely off their rockers. I have _no _idea how Flower will deal with those two screwballs. Anyways, back to business…What kind of gift should I get her?"

* * *

><p>"The throne room is elegant as it stands, perhaps we should find a famous decorating team?"<p>

"Coco's wedding was simply magnificent! A jewel of beauty and magnificence! We should look into seeing about who did her wedding?"

These past few weeks have been a blur. We'd held several long, tedious meetings each day to plan for my _Sumanni_ and quite frankly I was tired of all this planning. The Sarasaland elder council and father decided which eligible bachelors would be invited and I'm more than sure political agenda was heavily at play with whom they choose.

While the men oversaw the heavier matters, a cluster of elitist ladies of the Sarasaland court—led by Lady Angora of course—were holding meetings to decide what they wished to do for the decorations, what main courses should be served and musical entertainment.

Everything Lady Angora proposed was approved by father, who took time out of his schedule to see how things were progressing. The whole time the meetings went on, I sat there as nothing more than a placeholder; no one asked me how I wished my decorations and arrangements to be made.

No one asked what songs I wanted to dance to, or even what my favorite foods were to have at the dinner. Lady Angora and her pack of wolves decided every single thing and falsely pretended my input was paramount. All decorations were in gold, orange and whites and creams since they were 'my favorite colors.'

During one meeting I sat next to an architect toad who was renowned for his sculptures and drawings of beautiful palaces and events. As lady Angora hovered nearby gauging reactions, the architect opened his notebook and showed me a sketch of how he was going to transform our throne room into a beautiful masterpiece.

Indeed the picture of what our throne room would look like with the completion of the arrangements would be quite pretty. There was so much lace and flowers around but none of the frail, beautiful decorations embodied any aspect of me in it.

The decorations for the_ Summani _were a girl's dream but unfortunately that dream wasn't mine. It was worthy of a dainty, ladylike princess who loved lace and frills, pretty flowers and dreamed about nothing but dancing with handsome princes; she was not me.

Lady Angora's feline eyes were cool like chips of ice, "It is a most masterful creation is it not princess? Simply the eye's apple."

The other ladies took their cue from her and cooed their adorations, gushing happily over how beautiful their princess's Summani would be. But that wasn't enough for Lady Angora. When it came down to our battle of wills, she wanted to know undisputedly she had won.

She waved a slim, impatient milk-white hand through the air and like a pack of well-disciplined dogs, the court women fell silent. I looked up when the room fell deathly silent and all eyes were trained upon Lady Angora. While all eyes were on her, hers were strictly honed on me.

Her colorless eyes were cool and discerning, "What does her ladyship think of the decorations? Have we not toiled long hours putting together a magnificent celebration for her ladyship?"

It was a test, if I claimed to hate the decor then I was an ungrateful, spoiled child. However if I accepted Lady Angora won. I said what was expected, "This is wondrous and it's a dream come true."

The artist blushed as the court ladies smiled. I did everything in my power to avoid looking at Lady Angora; she was probably brimming with superiority. The ladies of the court were delighted, surprised I would agree with such womanly, delicate decorations when I was renowned as a boyish spitfire.

Perhaps she's mellowing out after all? Maybe the 'tomboy' princess is finally playing into her role as a dainty princess.

I bet that's all what they were thinking.

By night's end the final plan was proposed to Father and the Sarasaland delegates. In the midst of the praise about how I was finally starting to show my 'true colors' as a feminine princess, Father sat in the middle of all the acclaim studying me with a careful eye.

Every now and then he would nod mutely as an advisor complimented him on having such a, "Fair and womanly daughter."

By Tuesday the decorations were elegantly arranged around the palace. I watched despondently as the beautiful lace drapes and matching curtains were put up. The golden silk and cream drapery had been imported from Satinville and I honestly couldn't recall ever seeing prettier drapes or banners.

Beautiful glass sculptors of flowers, stars and fireflowers were arriving from their export in Glassville, a small city renowned for its beautiful sculptures. We also had the Sarasalandian locals involved in plenty; the Floral Fetish Company provided beautiful bouquets and vineyards for the throne room.

Simper Shyguy Inc. created beautiful announcements and calligraphy for multiple banners and signs as the Scary Chefs of Sarasaland were in charge of preparing the main feast. Father was in the midst of it all, spectating alongside of me. We watched as the planning crew—Parties by ParaKera—prepared the beautiful arrangements the court ladies had decided.

Father glanced at me, "And what does my dear daughter think of the décor? We have flown in the best of the best to give your party sophisticated grandeur."

Again I forced myself to say the words he wished to hear but my voice sounded hollow, "It is all so overwhelming and beautiful my king. What a lucky girl I am."

My father studied my expression for a second longer before he went back to observing the decoration committee. Perhaps if I had studied his facial expression more closely, I would have noticed how his jaw clenched.

A hoard of hovering paraKoopas hung a floral banner as a group of shyguys were busy writing old Sarasalandian greetings in a sparkling golden ink magicked to always shine.

"In a matter of three days, my daughter shall be recognized as an eligible woman," Father looked at me, "We have sent the invitations as of three weeks ago to this date and the amount of interested suitors is insurmountable."

I blinked at him, "What? Like seriously?!"

He arched an eyebrow at my causal vernacular and I blushed, "I m-meant oh my!"

He seemed to forgive my blunder and continued crisply, "Indeed. I suppose I should have not expected less than thousands of suitors after the hand of my daughter…you are just as lovely as your mother."

I looked up, surprised by the honest compliment, "Father…"

"I suppose my time protecting and watching over my little _Chisana_ is almost done," he whispered softly, placing a tender hand against my cheek.

_A _jolt ran through my system; _Chisana. _I hadn't heard him call me that since I was small. This was the era of my life when I was free to act boyish, when father was called daddy and he always smiled and laughed.

He had called me _Chisana_ which meant fireflower in our language. His pet name was a play on my name and my energetic, tomboyish personality. Back when I was his little _Chisana_ he found most of my antics and clumsiness darling. He loved the flare and luminosity of my smile and personality.

When I became older that same clumsiness and boyishness he once adored suddenly began to aggravate him. He would acerbically correct my demeanor and icily demand I act more befitting of my station as a princess.

It was around that same time he ordered me to stop calling him daddy and refer to him as father when we were alone and as his majesty or emperor in the presence of others. I looked up at Father in a mixture of wonder and warmth. He had long given up using my beloved nickname.

"Father..." I whispered.

Father stared, eyes unusually lucid and vulnerable. Then he closed his eyes, thumb over the bridge of his nose as he turned his back to me suddenly.

_What was going on?_

Before I could speak again, he swept away without another word. Stunned, I watched Father walk briskly out of the room. Others must have noticed his odd demeanor as they peered after him. I bit my lip; what was wrong with father?

"Princess? Please come this way."

"Ah! Right…Right…"

All of Wednesday involved having rehearsals and practices. Over and over I regurgitated specific lines I was supposed to say and where I was supposed to be. It was interesting to see who the council had brought into Sarasaland for my _Sumanni_. The staff hired famous chefs from many different kingdoms and cities to deliver the finest food.

Famous bakers were hired and I was delighted to see Koopie as head baker. The moment I saw her we both squealed and hugged. The DoReMi world class orchestra, who were infamous for their great music and myriads of awards, had come all the way from Songsville and was practicing in tune with our rehearsal. The lead composer was a lean, tall Koopa with a shock of blue hair.

Father and the council organized a technical crew to handle all the lighting for the evening. I found another treat; a 'beautifying crew' had been brought here and among them were Parry and Mademoiselle Lina.

I hugged both of them, heart screaming with joy to be amongst true friends. Auntie Lina was in charge of designing my dress as Parry would do makeup and hair. For the little downtime I was afforded I spent it with my friends, laughing and catching up on what they had been doing with their lives.

One of my advisors, Mr. Puffs found me 'lollygagging' and pulled me away to get back to business. Father was present for rehearsals. The event planners were teaching him when and where to be. Directors went through speeches and lines he was going to say.

In my mind I laughed; huh and here I thought father was 'programmed' with knowing everything there was to being a king. I suppose even he needed to be told how to be perfect. Unlike me though, as we went through the rehearsals no one corrected his posture.

We rehearsed performances and dances as the DoReMi orchestra practiced their songs accordingly, led by the blue-haired conductor as the waiters and staff practiced moving in tune with the music.

I practiced my waltz and ballroom dancing before Father and the council as suggested by Lady Angora. After two hours of work and really sore feet, Father deemed I "floated around the ballroom like a seraphim."

Time flew with the day-long rehearsing and training and before I knew, it was Friday morning. The morning of my _Sumanni_.

_Ahhhhhh! Panic mooooode!_

Breakfast wasn't served in the dining hall, I shoveled it down in my room. I was woken up at dawn—_ugh_ too early, need more sleep—to run through another complete rehearsal. As my dance instructor and I waltzed, swinging to the masterful tempo of music, I saw father hide a yawn.

I grinned; heh so even the perfect king was sleepy. Maybe this wasn't so bad after all. After rehearsal I was immediately ushered to my room. I was floored when Toadette smiled at me. I squealed and hugged her; she was apart of my beautifying staff!

Yay!

Lady Angora hovered nearby, silent as a phantom as she oversaw timely preparation. Parry hummed a Darklandian pop song as he washed my hair with a creamy, floral shampoo.

I laughed, "What? No chocolate-scented shampoo today?"

Parry chuckled, "Not this time, Beautiful. Tonight we must awe and stun potential suitors! We shall make you smell womanly and mature, yet enchanting."

"We shall see to it princess," Angora spoke, "that tonight you will be a radiant vision. A diamond in the night sky."

He repeated the shampoo cycle once more, adding what he called his secret 'beautiful hair serum.' Whatever it was the serum smelt like peaches and was thick like cream. Parry performed the final rise with conditioner and wrapped my hair in a towel. As I passed by my reflection I laughed; hey I looked like a genie!

One of the beauticians set a heavy seafoam-green cream over my face and I blushed cherry when I realized it had to be applied to my entire form.

"I'll have to get _naked_!?" I choked.

Parry laughed, joking he was going to 'miss the best part' and the staff laughed as my face became even redder; what _was_ with people and laughing at my embarrassment!?

"It'll make your skin sparkle like gems princess!" one toad servant winked.

"Every true lady of the court must have flawless skin," Angora reasoned, red lips quirked in a smirk.

Parry waved, promising he'd be back to do my hair when I was 'decent'. So after sitting in a cold, tingly swampy-green goop for half an hour, I took a shower and rinsed my face. Once washed, I sat in a robe as my nails were painted.

I almost ran out at the mention of acrylic nails but after an acerbic look from Lady Angora, I went with the flow. My toes and finger nails were done and they turned looked extremely nice. Toadette even added tiny, sparkling gems on my nails in the shape of a daisy.

"I thought it was indecent for a princess to show her hands in public," I asked Angora.

"That is so."

"Then what is the point of having my nails done?" I asked.

"Tonight the councilors have decided to make an exception," Angora replied crisply, "It shall be seen as…flirtatious and welcoming of you to do so."

"...Huh."

I took a second bath, glad this one wasn't green and slimy like a bog. I sighed as the heavenly aroma of roses and other mixed flora lingered in the air. I marinated in luxury for another half hour until a maid came in. Once I was dressed in a robe, Parry returned and added hundreds of tiny rollers into my hair.

I sat under a blowdryer, sifting through wrestling and sports magazines. Ooh, next Friday there was going to be a match between Rawk Hawk and Super Bullet Bill in Glitzville. Hmm, wonder if I could tag that into my itinerary for next week. Bowser could get Junior and we could see a match!

Lady Angora lurked, snooping nearby. I scooped a 'decoy' magazine over the wrestling magazine. It seemed like she minded her own business but I knew the truth. She was monitoring my reading material.

_Please buy it…Please buy it…_

"The 38th annual Toadstool Tour Beauty Pageant," Lady Angora, despite the straight face sounded pleased, "What lovely rolemodels those ladies are. Such true epitomes of beauty and grace."

Mentally I snorted; granted they were beautiful, graceful and all that jazz but was Angora forgetting how utterly dumb they were!? Between their ears was nothing but empty space.

'What are your thoughts on solving world peace?'

'Buy everyone puppies and kittens and then there will be no more battles! Because battles are yucky and ugly!'

Role models?

After sitting under the dryer for an hour I was done. I cast the magazines aside and stretched. I followed Auntie Lina, "So what's next?"

"And now the fun part," Auntie Lina beamed at me.

"Huh? What?"

"You'll see!" she laughed, winking.

The maids shooed Parry out the room, "We'll call you back when we're done!"

My eyes grew wide; uh oh. Anytime Parry left meant embarrassing girlishness was soon to follow. Someone came and held my shoulders,to keep me from running away.

"Hold her," Angora had a dangerous smile present, "If she tries to flee then lock the doors."

_Oh Stars, what the hell was going on!?_

The maids and servants tittered as they held up the laciest, frilliest snow-white lingerie I had ever seen. _Seen_. And I've been in Peach's wardrobe. I gasped, face blazing burgundy as I hid my face in my hands. The room erupted with laughter as I squeaked,"I-I am _not _wearing that!"

"Do it willingly," as Lady Angora grinned, Auntie Lina laughed, "Or by force. Take your pick princess."

I removed my robe, blushing terribly as I squeezed into frilly lace. There were cheers and catcalls that only served to embarrass me further. I glowered at them all and swore revenge. I slid on a short, cream-colored slip and was ushered to sit in a chair. The hired makeup artist, a Toadette with lots of wild, brightly-colored hair extensions and blue lipstick, applied makeup to my face. She matched my face with foundation called, 'golden dusk glow.'

Once my face was covered in the brown foundation, the artist applied eyeshadow? Yeah it had to be eyeshadow if it was placed it over my eyelids. The artist held a colorful palette of makeup in hand as she worked.

"These colors will make you look so stunning," she purred, "We're going to make you look super _hot!"_

"Green and pink hair and blue lipstick?" I chuckled, "How in the world did a bunch of conservatives hire you to do my makeup?"

She smirked, "Because I'm the _best _makeup artist _period._ When you're the best at what you do, everyone has to respect it."

"Okay, I see your point."

Even then it was hard to believe Lady Angora would hire someone with a wild appearance, even if she was the best makeup artist. This Toadette must work miracles if conservative court ladies saw past her looks and focused on her work.

"Just between you and me princess," the radical Toadette grinned, "you're pretty awesome."

I blinked, "You think so?"

"Yes," she nodded, "But don't blink! I'm trying to do your eye shadow! Look up! Hmm…more of a gold undertone…or maybe I should add a bit of green? Hmm…"

"Uh sorry…"

"Oh! What was that soccer team you played for?"

I arched an eyebrow, " The Sarasaland—?"

"No! The team where you wore that sexy black outfit! Usually all you wear are yellow gowns, I didn't know—heck the whole world didn't know you had a killer bod like _that!_"

At the compliment I blushed. Which reminds me, Bowser and I are going to have a _major_ talk about that uniform…Ever since the game I _swear _I've been receiving weird, ogling stares from men I've _never _gotten before.

"You were _so _kickass during that game! And King Bowser!? So _delicious_!" she didn't squeal, "You've always been a pretty badass princess."

"Thanks," I laughed, "But don't speak too loudly, Stars knows everyone here would have a heart attack if someone thought their dainty, weak princess was 'badass'."

"Hey," she whispered, "Don't let these old-fashioned jerks rain on your parade. No matter what anyone says, you're strong. Go out tonight and do you. Have as much fun as you want. This is _your _day so own it!"

I smiled; finally someone who liked me for me, "Thanks I will."

She grinned wickedly, "Great! Now sit back and let me do my thing. I'm Blue Dreams Toad and you milady, you're going to look great!"

Blue lined my eyes with uh eye…liner? Yes I realize I sound _dumb _but I only use mascara and lip balm_. _Since I was unused to the eye makeup, every time Blue Dreams lined my eyes, I almost completely cried it off.

It got to the point where a magikoopa enchanted the eyeliner to make it stay. Blue Dreams scrambled through a large makeup suitcase, pulling out several shades of lipstick.

And as she held the lipstick to my face, she went through a flamboyant elimination process. She would groan then chuck the tubes away until she came to the last one. She stared hard at the final tube before applying it to my lips carefully. She nodded happily; the color 'Sunsetting love' was just right.

"This color is so womanly," she whispered, "So sexy but sophisticated! Those princes are gonna eat their hearts when they see you!"

"Wow," I chuckled, "It looks that good?"

"For sure! Also your natural skin color is so pretty," she purred, "It reminds me of honey. I'm just going to lightly dust your cheeks with powder. I honestly don't think you need it but you look great."

By the time the extravagant makeup artist applied finishing touches, it was nearly four thirty. How time flies! The event starts at five! I've got to be done soon! There was a rap on the door and I tried not to blink as Blue Dreams carefully placed mascara onto my eyelashes, "Yes?"

"It's your father. Am I to come in…?"

I was only clad in a lacy slip that barely came to my thighs; oh ho ho! There was _no_ way I was letting my _father_ see me in so little. If he tried to come in here, I'd take drastic measures. I would jump out a window if I had to. Yes, I would jump out a _window_ before Father saw me.

"Oh Stars, I am nowhere _near_ decent. Please don't come in!"

I swore I heard a chuckle, "Modesty hmm? I suppose you've forgotten the days when I used to bathe you as an infant?"

There was a surprisingly warmth in his voice as he laughed lightly. I almost missed when he spoke again, "Very well, I will return for you in ten minutes."

"Yes Father…"

I turned around and smiled at the beauticians. Blue Dreams pulled away from me, grinning.

"Chop, chop people!" I chuckled, clapping my hands together, "Let's get the show on the road!"

Toadette began to remove the curlers meticulously from my hair as another maid sprayed perfume. As the final act in my transformation, Auntie Lina motioned me over. She smiled, eyes sparkling behind her pink horn-rimmed glasses, "Are you ready to see your dress I made especially for you?"

Grinning, I nodded my head, "Sure am Auntie."

In a flourish of grand gesture, Auntie threw her arms out, "Then bring out the masterpiece!"

The maids went to the closet and brought out a pure white dress. I was surprised, expecting it to be a customary yellow or orange. Auntie Lina's sapphire eyes gleamed as she watched me take in the dress. The gown was placed into my arms and I couldn't help but coo over it. Pure white and the silk glowed with the radiance of the moon.

Auntie Lina's eyes crinkled happily, "Why don't you go ahead and put it on Pumpernickel?"

I looked up at Auntie skeptically, "I don't want to ruin it or anything…"

"Don't worry dearie," she stepped forward, Toadette coming to her side, "We'll help you put it on."

"Just step in," Toadette smiled up at me, "Don't worry Dai! We won't allow your clumsiness to win. You're not going to rip this dress."

"Oh shove it," I laughed.

I slowly slipped into the gown. It was sleek, semi form-fitting and hugged my hips and bust flatteringly. _Ooh, hey I look like I have hips_! The dress cascaded off one of my shoulders, stylishly revealing bronze skin. Toadette combed my curls, probably teasing them up a bit so I have more volume.

I was given a matching pair of white heels and slipped them on. Thank the _Stars_ Auntie Lina was sane enough to put next to no heel on these shoes; I guess it shows how much she does know me. The beautifying was finished because Blue Dreams, Auntie Lina, Toadette and all the other maids stepped away from me smiling.

"Look at yourself Daisy," Toadette beamed.

I spun around towards the mirror and almost screamed. I felt my face and slowly drank in the image I presented. I no longer looked like a scrawny, boyish princess but an actual woman. A beautiful woman! Auntie Lina's dress was elegant as it swept to my feet. The poise of the single-shouldered dress was elegant and the overall flare of the dress looked Greek.

The dress managed to be both loose enough to be modest but flattering enough that it hugged my chest and hips nicely. I looked like a Greek goddess in one of their marvelous white gowns. I spun around to look at my back.

"So how do you like it Pumpernickel?" Auntie grinned happily, clasping her manicured claws together.

"I look amazing! It's simple but still super pretty! And…and it's nice and comfy too!"

"Yes I know how much you detest being uncomfortable," Auntie grinned cheekily, "I made it especially soft and smooth for you. It took weeks to find the right fabrics but that's not important! I wanted to get a gift for your_Summani_ but I suppose designing a beautiful dress for _un fille joli _works out just fine."

"Thank you Auntie." I pulled her in for a hug and laughed at the soft sounds of her purr.

"_Il n'y a pas de quoi," _Auntie cooed, tail wagging.

I took in my dolled-up reflection, I can't believe the girl staring back was me. My skin seemed to glow beautifully in a smooth bronze sheen and my face was gorgeous! Blue Dreams had given my eyes a smoldering, dark smokey look. It seemed to make the blue of my eyes bluer and also mysterious, enchanting even.

Parry came in and brushed out the last of the loose cherry curls and let them hang beautifully down my shoulders. He stepped back alongside of Auntie and grinned.

"You are such a vision princess!" he chirruped happily, "Those princes will be _drooling_, tongues wagging!"

The door to my room opened. I watched through the mirror as both Father's reflection and Lady Angora entered. Father wore gleaming, white silk robes and his most ceremonial circlet sparkled under the light.

Ever elegant, Lady Angora wore her ebon hair in its usual swept up bun and was attired in a deep blood red dress that seemed to make her skin appear stark white and her lips blood-red. Both searched around the room but I saw the moment father's eyes fell upon me. He looked at my smiling reflection and gasped. His stolid expression broke as he walked towards me in several quick strides.

He gently placed his hands on my shoulder and spun me to face him. He looked awed, "Heavens above you look absolutely stunning _Chisana_."

"Thank you father," I spoke softly as he still continued to take in my image.

"My king we've done well," Angora's red lips curled into a soft smile, "We truly have. She looks like such a beautiful jewel."

"Agreed Lady Angora, however I have a small token I would like to bestow upon my daughter."

He turned around to an awaiting servant. The servant handed him a small wooden box and bowed before leaving. My father carefully opened the box and resting on blue velvet was a beautiful floral hair ornament. It was a daisy that was crafted of gems and fine silk.

"If I may?" father asked.

I nodded my head and watched as he removed the jeweled flower and placed it behind my ear. I turned to look at my reflection and marveled. The large hair flower was gorgeous and glittered enchantingly as the light sparkled against the many rubies, sapphires and topaz jewels.

"Should I put on my crown?" I asked.

I almost laughed at how eagerly Parry, Auntie Lina, Toadette and the rest of the staff shook their heads, "Let your natural beauty shine! No one will question who the Sarasaland princess is tonight!"

"Girl you look great," Blue laughed.

"I have one more gift that I would like to bestow upon you princess," father spoke, his eyes tender and bright like the blue waters of Del Fino island, "This keepsake used to belong to your mother."

He opened a second box and revealed another set of impressive jewelry. There was a set of flower earrings and a matching rainbow flower necklace. I took the box and looked up at Father, "…Thank you…daddy."

There was no scolding or acerbic glare. If anything Father's expression softened, "You are more than welcome _Chisana_. You look so much like Rose it pulls at the strings of my heart."

I was too busy meeting my father's eyes to even notice when the jewelry and earrings where placed upon my person.

"Shall we go and announce you to the world my little flower?" father offered me his arm.

I smiled, tears pricking at the edge of my eyes, "Yes daddy."

* * *

><p>"The orchestra will begin playing in five minutes…The guests are being gathered…The grand entrance will begin within three minutes…"<p>

With my arm wrapped within Father's, together we walked through the halls. We were dead silent with nothing but my clanking heels echoing through the corridors. Beside us was the event planner who was making sure everything, the orchestra and the lighting was ready for our grand entrance.

Stars this was probably the most nervous I have felt ever in my life. My legs were trembling and I hoped I could put on a brave face. It was only a matter of time before I was presented before thousands upon thousands of royal guests who would judge every aspect about me.

"Is the DoReMi orchestra ready yet? Good—and the lighting technicians? Great—the emperor and the princess will be arriving in two minutes, yes I repeat two minutes…"

While it was not directly relayed to me I knew the reputation of Sarasaland was in balance. Any mistake I made would reflect directly upon Father and potentially strain relationships with other kingdoms.

_Breathe in, breathe out…_

As maids and servants scrambled, we went to the entrance for our grand entry to the throne room. The dead silent atmosphere of the hall contrasted with that of the throne room; loud and roaring with life.

I looked up and thought up a silent prayer.

_Dear Stars in Star Haven, please keep me from falling right onto my ass. Or if I do fall onto my ass, please make something more embarrassing happen to someone else…_

I could hear laughter, merriment and loud conversation flooding from the throne room. The orchestra began playing the royal Sarasalandian hymn, a tune that meant we were about to make our great entrance.

"Emperor and princess," the event planner took off his headset and grinned in our direction, "It's showtime! You're on in five…four…"

_Oh Stars don't let me fall on my ass!_

"…three…two…"

_And maybe let there be a cute prince or two? Amen!_

"One!"

And with that he pointed towards the throne room; showtime.

"_Ladies and gentlemen_," a rich voice wafted over the crowd, "_I would like to present his majesty Emperor Sakuro and presenting for the first time, her majesty Princess Daisy of Sarasaland_."

A glowing, radiant spotlight awaited our grand entrance. Father looked at me and gave a small smile, "Nervous?"

"_Very..._" I groaned.

"Do not be _Chisana_," his soft voice calmed the fluttering butterflies in my stomach. His long, smooth fingers entwined within mine, "It is your time to shine and sparkle like your flourishing smile."

"Father…"

"My little Flower," he continued with his soft whisper, "I will let nothing happen to you."

"What if I trip and fall? Or what if I offend someone or—"

"You are safe with your father," he tightened his grip on my hand, "This evening will be an honor to your name. Now let's go and give this celebration life."

I smiled a bit, "Yes…Let's do it."

We stepped forward, past the door and into the throne room and suddenly the large crowd of onlookers appeared. The crowd clapped respectably as the orchestra flared an even grander tempo at our appearance.

The ballroom was filled with thousands of people. There were so many people of different shapes, sizes and colors. I could see many different headdresses, crowns, tiaras, scepters and all kinds of flagrant capes, gowns, cloaks of all colors.

The spotlight hovered on us as we made the long trek to the throne. Hand in hand Father and I walked past the many intrigued eyes and turning heads. As I walked through, I looked into the crowd to find one specific face. It shouldn't be too hard to find an eight foot tall Koopa in a mass of people who average five feet and something inches.

I spotted smiling faces and the closer we became to the throne, the more I recognized the faces. Some were friends or allies I played with on my sports team. The councilors all stood together as did Lady Angora and her swarm of court ladies and as Father and I passed each of them, they inclined their heads in a show of respect.

And soon the faces transformed from acquaintances into family members and dear friends. Yet again I saw Koopie, Parry, and Auntie Lina who all but waved excitedly. Then I saw my older friends Yoshi and Toad who both winked and gave a thumbs up. I beamed as I saw Toadette in the crowd, waving at me with a big grin right along with Birdo who blew kisses.

Next I saw the Mario brothers. Luigi was flushed completely red as he waved to me shyly and Mario tipped his hat. Last but not least were my closet of kin, my uncle and the king of the Mushroom kingdom stood next to Peach. My uncle's eyes crinkled happily as he bowed and Peach beamed at me teary-eyed.

Beside Uncle Apricotto was good ole Grammy. As Grammy and Apricotto started to do more visible, desperate things to get my attention, Peach curtsied and the next thing I knew, we arrived at the throne. In the mixture of my closest friends, where was Bowser?

He should have been near Peach and Uncle. Was he here? Or did he decide this wasn't something really for him. Father and I stood before the crowd who watched us enraptured. Father looked at me and gestured, "Ladies and gentlemen, I give you my daughter and the crown princess of Sarasaland."

As I curtsied, the cheers grew from being polite to nearly deafening. The Mario brothers' whistles alone were clearly audible. My soccer team was chanting a, "Long Live Princess Daisy!" in the crowd.

I flushed happily and took a seat.

"_Soleil ha arrazagaga_," Father raised a hand, "May the ceremony begin."

Then a roar of cheers rose as the festivities began. Father picked up a scepter and with a spin, white and gold confetti littered from the ceiling. Enraptured the crowd oohed and awed as the applause and cheers became louder. I laughed, knowing the scepter had been rented especially for the occasion.

Before we went to the ballroom for the feast and dancing, I sat on the throne as thousands of suitors were introduced. They announced their title, where they hailed from and presented a gift I couldn't open yet.

By the time I met every single suitor, I couldn't remember who was from where and what their title was. Although I did smile and wave when Luigi appeared with his grinning brother.

Father and I moved to the ballroom where the largest, centermost table awaited. Peach, Unc, and Grammy sat beside Father and Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Toad, Birdo and Toadette sat at our table. The orchestra played soft music in the background as refreshments were served.

The beautiful banquet was served and a delicious roasted boar was set upon our table. The crowd cheered and as was tradition, Father cut the first meat and soon all other visitors were served their dinner platters.

"Emperor Sakuro!" A loud voice boomed.

Approaching our table was a _giant_ goomba. And by giant I mean gigantic; this guy was probably bigger, taller than Bowser! With each step he took, the ground rattled and the guests at nearby tables held unto their plates.

The king smiled largely and his golden crown was almost as big as his head. Behind him was a smaller, more reasonably-sized goomba wearing a silver crown.

"King Doomba of the Goombalands," Father rose to his feet smoothly and inclined his head respectfully, "It is an honor to have you at my daughter's _Summani. _We of Sarasaland are pleased to entertain you."

"Well said good man! It is great to be in Sarasaland! We goomba love the heat of the desert!" Then the massive King was grinning, turning to look at me, "And I say, your daughter is absolutely beautiful! Why, I'd take a gander at her myself if I wasn't happily married!"

I blushed, gaping wordlessly as the bold king laughed; he would try to flirt with me?! My Stars that would be a scary thought. I tried to hide my shudder.

"Well Princess Daisy," the Goomba lord continued in his deep, carrying voice, "I would not have you think ill of my people! We of Goombaland are not schmucks, we've come baring miles of gifts!"

"Ah, thank you," I smiled up at the king who smiled back gently, "I hope your travel was pleasant."

"No need to worry about such things, our travel was fine," then the king made a sly look, "Why, my son Doomba Jr. is here as well. Perchance he'll sweep you off your feet."

The King moved aside to reveal the less intimidating goomba prince. I almost laughed at the way the king 'accidentally' shoved his son towards me. The smaller goomba blinked, before flushing and looking at me shyly, "Uh…H-Hello there princess."

"Hello there Prince Doomba Junior," I smiled back.

"I-It's uh…" he looked at me for a second before he looked away again, "I-It's nice to meet you."

"Perhaps you'll save a dance for my boy," The king grinned, "We've got to get back to our seats, just wanted to say hello!"

The two goombas left, retiring to their own tables. After they left, another royal approached my table. Only this one made Luigi scream out in terror. Hovering before us was King Boo.

His narrow red eyes glowed brightly like the dying ember of a flame. The slow smile crawling across his face was nothing but malice. From the corner of my vision, I could see Mario covering Luigi's mouth as the green plumber continued to scream.

_"Many salutations, Emperor Sakuro_," I was surprised at the smooth, rich voice, "_I shan't deny my utter surprise and delight at receiving an invitation to this…glorious event."_

This time I heard Luigi cry out incredulously, "Mama Mia! He-a was invited?! What-a is wrong with those-a crazy peo—mmph!"

Mario covered his brother's mouth, appearing worried. I don't know if Father heard Luigi or not but he carried on as if he didn't, "King Boo, Sarasaland extends its friendship to anyone deserving."

_"Ah. What a rather…curious philosophy Sarasaland embodies. Many thanks are due then_."

The moment King Boo turned his glowing red eyes upon me, I froze. By the Stars I was terrified; this looming creature had the craft to stick Mario in a picture. The boo monarch hovered closer, blazing eyes taking me in,_"It is quite the pleasure to finally meet you, Princess Sarasaland. You are just as beauteous as rumor has told."_

"Ah…nice to meet you too King Boo and thank you."

The ghost grinned, revealing rows of sharp teeth, "_I would very much appreciate if you saved me a dance this evening_…?"

"I-I will…"

With that the King reached forward and kissed my hand. It was a strange phenomenon because even though he's a ghost, I could feel his touch. And when his lips pressed lightly against my hand it felt like ice.

Luigi screamed louder, shriller and I'm sure by now Mario was doing everything in his power to shut his baby brother up. King Boo gave one last sly smile before floating away. The next person who came towards our table was the blue-haired Koopa conductor.

He looked far younger than what I thought. He was probably in his mid-teens and was tall without the usual adolescent gawkiness. In a show of proper etiquette he bowed courteously.

"So, you're the brilliant young mind behind the DoReMi's legendary sounds?" Father smiled at the Koopa, "Your music is absolutely superb young composer."

"It is a privilege to meet you lord emperor," the Koopa bowed, the lightest touches of a smile grazing his face, "I am Prince Ludwig Von Koopa of the Darklands and music is both my livelihood and passion. I am pleased your lordship approves of my music."

"It is wonderful Prince," Father placed his arm on the prince's shoulder and motioned towards me, "Young Koopa this is my daughter, Princess Daisy of Sarasaland."

He turned to peer at me. Even in heels my head barely reached the Koopa prince's shoulder. He was dressed smartly in a dark tuxedo, wild blue mane slicked back against his head. His eyes were a stunning shade of slate blue.

"Pleasure to meet you Prince Ludwig."

His voice was smooth and rich, "Likewise, Princess."

He took my hand and planted a soft kiss on my knuckles. Hmm, his claws were short and blunt. Every Koopa I had met had sharp talons, even Wendy whose claws were manicured and pink were sharp.

I smiled a bit as he stood back to his full height, "Are you enjoying your _Summani, _your ladyship?"

"Yes, it is quite nice. I hope that you'll also enjoy yourself as well Prince Ludwig," he nodded his head, and just as he turned to walk off I asked him, "Would you like me to save a dance for you later?"

He blinked, surprise donning on his face. Then he quickly schooled his features back into composure as he nodded his head, "I would be honored if you did so. It would be my pleasure to dance with you princess."

He turned and walked away and I was surprised to see he wasn't wearing a shell. _I thought all Koopas wore shells…? _It was a bit weird, he wasn't anything like any of the Koopas I've met before; he seemed thoughtful and level-headed. He was polite and very mannerly even but didn't father introduce him as a prince? Was he related to Bowser? Because his kin were the only Koopa royalty I knew…

"Why howdy there Princess! Allow me to introduce myself…"

So this pattern of monarchs coming up and introducing themselves to my father and I continued throughout dinner. By the time I had met them all, I couldn't remember who was from where and what each prince, earl, duke, lord's name was. I just met hundreds of royals within seconds and I had a minor headache.

While I was 'recovering' I heard Grammy speculating to Uncle Apricotto about who would win between Rawk Hawk and the Super Bullet Bill, Father looked at both of them trying to—and poorly doing so—hide his agitation.

"Super Bullet Bill is the greatest underrated pro wrestled there is period!" Uncle spoke.

"Ha! But no one can beat the champ!" Grammy shook a fork at her son, "Once your oh so great Super Bullet Bill gets a taste of the Rawkin' Suplex, he's history!"

"Seeing as this is my daughter's _Sumanni_," Father spoke slowly so his temper didn't conflagrate, "Perhaps we should speak of something more appropriate."

"Oh quit being a wet blanket Saky," Grammy grinned at the way her serious son tensed up, "You invited us here to see my darling grandbaby's _Sumanni _and so here I am."

"Yeah 'Saky,'" Uncle beamed at the acerbic glare Father cut his direction, "Lighten up a bit big bro!"

"Hmm."

"Hey-a Daisy!"

I peered across the table and the infamous plumber called. Mario grinned, "Hey what's up? You're-a looking fine tonight."

"Why thank you Mario," I beamed at him, sipping from a tall glass of apricot wine.

"Should I have-a Luigi introduce himself to you-a like all those other guys did-a?"

I laughed, "Please don't…"

"Well then…Luigi has something-a he wants to say," amused, I watched as Mario elbowed Luigi in his stomach, which made me think Mario was putting him up to whatever it was.

Luigi blushed, trying to look everywhere but at me, "I…I t-think you look g-g-g-gorgeous tonight."

I smiled, "Thank you Lulu. You look great tonight too!"

Since he continued to stare, I shot a playful wink his way. Luigi glowed a deeper shade of red. He lowered his cap over his face as Mario laughed. A slim, willowy figure approached, "Would you like another apricot wine, my princess?"

I looked up and smiled, "Thank you."

A servant woman replaced my empty glass for a second goblet bubbling to the brim with delicious apricot wine. I blinked, stunned at how beautiful she was; she had bright jewel-blue eyes, soft carnation-pink lips and the most peculiar hair.

Her neck-length hair was a stunning shade of carnation, as if the rich color had been abstracted from the petals of a flower. Yet her exquisite hair color complimented her beauty. If anything it made her look ethereal, as if she wasn't from this universe. Lily-white fingers swept long bangs away out her eyes as she grinned.

"Thank you," I had already thanked her for the drink, but now I wasn't sure what exactly I was thanking her for.

"It is my ultimate pleasure princess," amusement shone through her eyes as her petal pink lips curled into a soft smile, "By the way, you look marvelous tonight. Extraordinarily beautiful."

I blushed, "Thank you!"

"Now then, is there anything else I can retrieve for you?" She smiled widely, blue eyes glinting like gems.

"I…No, no everything is fine."

"Such a well-mannered lady," she cooed, bright eyes sparkling, "You are absolutely gorgeous. If I were a man, I'd try to give some of these princes a run for their money."

I flushed at her praise as she laughed, a mellifluous sound filling the air, "Well then I hope you enjoy your _Summani_, princess."

I blinked, stunned as she leaned over and tugged playfully at my cheek. She spun on her heel and was gone, waltzing away with an elegant stride befitting of her beauty. I stared after her stupidly, still surprised by the appearance of such a woman.

_Who was she?_

I knew every servant who worked here by heart. I think I'd remember a face like hers or the aura of poise. Maybe she was a part of the extra staff that was flown in to help with my _Summani?_

She faded into the crowd like a rose among dandelions as I stared after her silky pink bob. I flinched, suddenly aware someone placed their hand on my shoulder. It was Mario, beaming and starting to tell everyone about our Super Striker game.

While Yoshi shared a story about a tennis match with Toad, I noticed something _very _interesting. Mario seemed to be in a trance, staring all too longing across the table at Peach. Peach looked fabulous with her hair swept into an elegant bun and adorned in a shimmering pink gown. She blushed prettily under his admiring scrutiny. Mario's fascination wasn't lost on Uncle either.

Uncle looked irritated that a man—regardless of being the legendary Mario—was eying his pretty daughter. Grammy looked amused, watching the two parties with interest.

"_Ahem_," Uncle growled.

Mario blinked, awakening out of his trance. The red hero was surprised to have the hostile stare of the Mushroom king boring down on him. Father laughed, taking joy in Uncle's vexation. Uncle Apricotto suddenly noticed me and grinned impishly.

I frowned; uh oh.

"So Miss Daisy," Uncle was beaming, "Any of these young men receiving your attention my little firecracker? You've been introduced to a lot of nice boys here."

"Uh…well," I spoke softly, "I...I haven't been looking honestly."

I blushed, realizing half the table fell silent at Uncle's query. While Yoshi and Toad were blatantly eavesdropping, Father and Peach were too well-mannered and pretended not to be listening. It took great effort not to laugh when Grammy blatantly turned her chair around to listen in.

"Well I have to say Sakuro," Uncle grinned at father, "the little boys in here have certainly been after my pretty little niece! Just wait 'til the fast music starts to play. They'll be all over her."

"She gets her hotness from me," Grammy winked as she told Luigi, who spat up his drink in shock.

Although Father didn't reply, I swore his face became flushed as Uncle Apricotto continued to nudge him with an elbow.

"Who knows, maybe one of these youngsters will be your future son-in-law huh? HUH? Huh?" Unc wriggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Father enjoyed his meal, "Well, it will be _awhile _before my daughter is wed. We probably can't say the same about my niece, seeing all the attention a _certain_ young plumber has been giving her all evening."

Uncle Apricotto flushed angrily, "Married!? Not my baby! Peach won't be allowed to date _until _she's thirty five and then she can't get married until she's forty!"

"F-Father!" Peach bleated, blushing pink.

Father was laughing, "She'll be married before Daisy, that's for sure."

Uncle stood up, causing quite a ruckus, "Y-You take those words back you stiffo!"

Father smirked, cutting his eyes into a slant, "And what if I don't? What will you do about it _little_ brother?"

A bit apprehensive, Peach looked over at Grammy, "Grandmother, perhaps we should stop them? Uncle and Father sound as if they're about to get into a fi-"

"Shh now darling, Grammy wants to see this. My sons are both gentlemen and they shall handle this as such. But if they start to fight, step back and duck their punches. Be quick hon."

"Erm..." Peach looked hilariously troubled.

Uncle Apricotto growled, "You wanna go outside and settle this like men, _Sakura!_?"

Just as Father was about to respond, a flustered toad appeared by his side, "E-Emperor?"

"What troubles you Alabaster?" Father replied, "I was just about to shame my brother—"

"S-S-Sire there is a g-g-guest here who is demanding we let him in!" the toad gulped.

Still unperturbed Father continued, "Does he have an invite?"

"Surprising yes he does," the toad sounded shocked, "Surely it must be a mistake…he is all but threatening the staff…"

"Threatening?" Father arched an eyebrow.

"Y-Yes the guest said to let him in now or I quote," Alabaster spoke, tremors still raking his small form, "or else he shall 'smack us so hard our family tree will split.'"

At that Grammy promptly bust out laughing, "My, that's quite hilarious! And may I inquire who the guest is saying those funny words? Tell those guards Queen Meringue wishes him to be sent in!"

Grammy's statement received incredulous looks from Alabaster and half of the table. Peach and I were used to our grandmother's eccentric ways. Peach pretended she heard nothing and politely sipped at her honey wine as I grinned, shaking my head.

Father's stare intensified, "And who pray tell is this guest that has the mannerisms of a spoilt child?"

"I-It's K-K-K-King B-Bowser."

There was a collective gasp. Mario's face became austere as Luigi grew pale, looking as if he were about to wet his pants. Father remained the epitome of calm as Uncle Apricotto looked excited. Worry plagued her features as Peach moved closer to wrap her arms around Toad's.

"King Bowser eh?" Grammy was one of the few people who didn't look perturbed, "My, how interesting…"

Father glanced in my direction, "He is to be treated like a proper guest. We will show him the same Sarasalandian courtesy we have shown every one of our other guests today."

The toad blinked, stunned, "S-Sire?"

"He has an invitation, let him in Alabaster would you?" Father asked, coolly taking a sip from his goblet, "It would be terribly rude to invite a person and in return not allow them entry don't you think?"

"Y-Yes emperor," with that the toad jetted out of there faster than a bullet bill.

I smiled; Bowser was here! He was here! I knew he wouldn't miss my _Sumanni_! He may act like a big, bad tough guy but deep down I knew he was a good guy…er Koopa. The double doors to the throne room clattered open with a resounding bang and in stepped the infamous King Bowser. The crowd's conversation died away into hushed whispers at the sight of the tyrannical ruler.

Beside Mario, Bowser was the only other person universally recognized. He was the notorious King Bowser, legendary ruler of the Darklands, the kingdom of fire.

Where Mario's red and blue clothing was recognizable, Bowser's spines, horns, spiked bracers and fierce visage were iconic. Not to mention he was eight feet of nothing but pure muscle and foul temper.

As I rose to my feet, I barely noticed the curious looks shot my direction. The crowd parted with an earnest rush at Bowser's sudden appearance. With all eyes upon him, Bowser's glare only sharpened as a cold grin stretched across his face. He threw his shoulders back and strutted through the crowd.

Bowser wore a black shell with a polished, marble-like finish. And underneath he wore a snazzy white tuxedo. All the guys here were wearing black or dark colored tuxs but leave it to Bowser to find a way to stand out.

Wendy and Junior were a few steps behind their father. The prince's polished formal shell was a deep blue with a matching blue bow tie. Like his father he wore a white tuxedo. Wendy was garbed in a peach dress and wore matching eye shadow. In place of her normal bow she had a large shimmering headband and as she swayed, she fanned herself with a matching peach fan.

Kamek and Kammy were trailing just a bit after the royal family. Kamek wore his normal ensemble, except he wore formal black robes. Kammy wore her usual attire, only her robes were a sparkling white.

And was she wearing lipstick and earrings? Why yes she was!

The sight of Bowser made my heart race and cheeks glow. Drawn to his presence, like a wiggler to the flames, I approached. Then there was the glorious moment Bowser picked me out of the crowd.

He looked around with a bored, hostile glare. His red eyes flickered over the thousands of faces in the crowd and I knew the moment he saw me. He blinked, sharp grin growing larger as he began to strut forward.

Junior 'yahooed' happily and rushed through the crowd. I ignored all the gasps and dismayed cries as Junior bumped and pushed his way past my guests. The Koopa prince latched onto my legs and beamed, "Hiya Mama Daisy!"

"Heya big shot," I beamed as I bent down to hug him, "How have you been cutie pie? I missed you."

"I missed ya too!" Junior purred, tail wagging happily.

"Hey, aren't you lookin' good?" I laughed lightly as I fixed his bowtie, "All the little girlies will be falling after my handsome little Koopa. You tryin' to bag a girlfriend or something BJ?"

"_Maaaama_!" he bleated out in mild embarrassment.

I laughed, giving him a noogie until the scent of peaches and cherries filled my nostrils. That much perfume could only mean one thing…

"_OMS_!" I heard a girlish squeal and knew it was Wendy.

The Koopa princess clamored towards me and even violently shoved someone out of her way. She gawked, wide-eyed as she took me in.

"You look FABULOUS!" She grinned suddenly as she snatched my hands into hers, "You look sooo beautiful Dai! _Beautiful!"_

"Well you look amazing too Wendy!" I laughed.

She winked, "Of course! I always look amazing! But you…wow!"

The Koopa princess spun me in a circle. While Wendy continued to preen and coo, Junior happily hopped around and danced beside us. Kamek and Kammy approached. Both of them bowed before they looked at me. Kamek was beaming largely as Kammy had a small smirk.

"My ladyship you look splendid!" Kamek beamed, chuckling at my rose-red face.

"Yes, you look magnificent," Kammy nodded politely, "Mademoiselle Lina and Parry did a fine job."

"Thank you! You both look wonderful! And Kammy!" I chirruped happily, "You look nice! You look wonderful with lipstick!"

I laughed as Kammy's face rouged. Kamek grinned stupidly as she bumbled over her words, "W-Well yes, I suppose I did try a bit harder on myself. H-His lordship stressed how imperative it was to make a good impression and all."

Then a familiar shadow eclipsed my light. I looked up, beaming as Bowser appeared. I stood up straight and stepped closer, "Well don't you look sharp King Koopa?"

"I always look like sex," Bowser chuckled as I full-out laughed, "But holy Stars check you out Flower."

He smirked impishly as he all too obviously scrolled his eyes over my frame, "You were always pretty before but you're just _smokin'_ hot now. I'm surprised security hasn't had to beat guys off of you."

I blushed, hiding my embarrassment with a laugh, "Bowser will you just shut it?"

He grinned, leaning forward, "So do you want me to howl and whistle now or later? Drooling can be included too…if you do a hairflip and swish your hips."

"Ugh! _Daddy!"_ Wendy cried out disbelievingly, "Are you like _seriously _flirting with her while _I'm _standing here?!"

"What?" Bowser grinned as Wendy glared at him, "If you don't wanna hear this kinda stuff then cover your ears."

"I shouldn't have to!" she groaned.

I laughed. As I was about to offer a reply, another person approached my left. Father appeared, analyzing Bowser with the intensity of a hawk.

Though there was no hostility or tension in his face, Father was content to study the king of Koopas with detached interest. At Father's appearance, Bowser's smile disappeared and his fierce visage resurfaced. The king Koopa stood up straighter, using his entire eight foot frame to loom over us.

Bowser narrowed his eyes as Father calmly observed him. It was terse, having two powerful important men in my life staring each other down. Neither of them spoke a word, yet they knew exactly who the other man was. This was becoming a bit weird, they weren't even blinking!

They were just _staring_!

Finally this—whatever they were doing—ended when Father took a step towards Bowser.

"Lord Bowser," Father spoke in his normal cool tenor, perfectly composed, "I would like to cordially welcome you to my daughter's _Sumanni_."

"Yes," Bowser squinted his eyes, as if trying to remember something, "Thank…you for inviting me. I…am…pleased to be here Emperor Sakuro."

Out of the corner of my vision, Kammy and Kamek brightened. Something tells me this was a practiced speech. If Father was shocked by Bowser's mannerly words then he didn't show it.

He inclined his head, "Then may you and yours enjoy the celebration Lord Bowser."

Father shot an incomprehensible glance my way. He hesitated. His jaw worked as if to speak but he snapped his mouth closed shortly after. He appraised Bowser with a lingering stare one last time before sweeping away.

And where Bowser was, Mario wasn't too much farther behind. The Mario brothers stood near the front of the crowd. They were ready to pounce if he tried anything; well Mario at least. Luigi would probably run the opposite direction. Standing beside the Mario brothers were Peach, Uncle, Grammy, Yoshi, Toad and Toadette.

Toadette wasn't staring at Bowser, she was looking past him and curiously at Junior. Junior noticed her demure stare because he suddenly beamed and winked. Toadette flushed prettily and waved. Quick as ever, Wendy caught their small exchange as a calculative gleam shone in her eyes.

Uncle Apricotto stepped forward, looking at Bowser sternly, "So we finally get to meet face to face King Bowser. I've been eagerly _awaiting_ this day."

Bowser arched an eyebrow, "Um…yeah so..._Who_ are you?"

"I am going to be your worst nightmare! I am King—!"

"Why hello there King Bowser," My grandmother sauntered over casually.

With a soft smile and twinkling eyes, she gauged him with a polite curiosity. Bowser blinked, probably surprised she had no trepidation or wariness. The king watched her, "You _must_ be Daisy's grandmother. She has your exact bluest of blue eyes."

"That's right son," when Grammy playfully nudged Bowser in the shoulder, a part of the crowd gasped. Maybe they expected Bowser to become infuriated. No, he looked shocked.

Grammy continued, "If you wanna know what I looked like forty years ago check out my granddaughter, only give her black hair and poof! Me in a nutshell."

Bowser even glanced my way,"You don't say…?"

Then she cupped her hands conspiratorially to 'whisper' to him, "I was pretty cute yes? A real 'hottie' as you youngsters say!"

"W-What!?" Bowser half-choked and half-laughed.

As grandmother relished Bowser's bewilderment, she laughed airily. I slapped a hand to my mouth; Stars, _please_ help me keep my laughter in. My stomach was hurting so bad but if I bust out into laughter I won't be able to stop it.

And just when you'd think the lunacy was over, Uncle stepped forward and stuck his finger into Bowser's plastron, "Hey! I'm _talking _here pal! Do you think I'll tolerate you ignoring me!? Do you think mama raised a fool? Well mama didn't raise no fool!"

Bowser glared at Uncle with a hilarious expression; as if he didn't know whether to be more offended or disgusted. Unc worked up the courage to poke him in the chest again.

"Now that's more like it. I'm King Apricotto, ruler of the Mushroom kingdom," he narrowed his eyes, "You've got _some_ guts kidnapping my sweet Peachykins all these years. If I was twenty years younger I'd say we'd go out back and settle things like men! Two men, four knuckles a cheep-cheep bikini and a yoshi tarp."

I laughed as Bowser frowned, "Wait...I was with you until you threw in the bikini and yoshi tarp. The hell does that have to do with anything!?"

"Don't make sense of his words," I whispered to him.

"Also did you call Peach..._Peachykins!_?" Bowser choked out.

Peach glowed a charming shade of red. Mario seemed to have forgotten all about his hostility towards Bowser as he looked at his beloved and chuckled heartily at her embarrassment. Bowser continued to stare at Uncle as if he were crazy; and honestly who could blame him?

Uncle Apricotto continued, arms crossed and eyes narrowed in what was supposed to be a threatening manner, "Since you're friends with my precious little niece, there will be no more kidnapping of my daughter anymore…right?"

Bowser arched an eyebrow, shrugging apathetically, "I guess not…"

"Good. Then that means I won't have to drag you out back and as you kids say 'whip your ass'."

I exploded with laughter. Again Bowser looked hilariously floored. The fierce glare on uncle's face dissolved as he suddenly grinned.

He even slapped Bowser on the shoulder good naturedly, "Since we've settled things and you know not to _mess _with the Mushroom King, let's be friends! So Bowser, can I call you Bo? Bro-sky? Browser? Broham? Always wanted to call ya that. It has a nice ring to—"

A deadpan, "No."

"Well then Bowz, it's just smashing to have you along for the celebration," Uncle Apricotto beamed, "Enjoy the fun, stop by at my table for a bit. I've always wanted to lick you at a drinking contest. The honey wine is divine!"

Someone tapped Bowser on the shoulder. Grammy's eyes crinkled at the corners, "Since I failed to introduce myself earlier, I am Queen Meringue dearie; it is nice to finally have the opportunity to meet you."

"Milady," Bowser bowed deep, as did grandmother.

"My granddaughter has spoken a lot about you," she was beaming now," anyways we're going to have a drinking contest when Sakuro's not watching! He's a bit terse when it comes to such things and he won't even listen to his dear ole mother when I tell him to lighten up a bit. Anyways why not stop on by for a few seconds and join our table then dear!" Grammy whispered, winking as she elbowed him in the ribs.

And in their usual style, my family left another newcomer befuddled. Uncle left, patting me on the shoulder and kissing Peach on the cheek as he melded away, humming a catchy tune to himself. While Grammy was flouncing through the crowd, snapping her fingers in tune with the music.

Bowser slowly turned to face me, still shocked from meeting my whimsical uncle and vivacious grandmother. I laughed at his silly expression.

"_My Stars_," Bowser growled, eyes refocusing, "What in the world are they _on_? Tell me now so that I can ban it in my kingdom _stat_."

I laughed, "Grammy and Uncle Apro have always been like that."

Bowser shook his head in disbelief, "Well now everything makes sense, no _wonder_ why it's so easy to kidnap Peach, the Mushroom Kingdom's ruler is a total nut job."

I chuckled, "We prefer to call him extravagant."

"No what you _should_ call him is a spot in the nearest asylum."

The DoReMi orchestra kicked to life in a grand flare and a fast, swinging tempo came to life. I watched as other couples began to dance. The dance floor cascaded with splashes of red, pink and purple lights as the lively music filled the palace.

_(Toad's factory Mario Kart wii)_

Bowser chuckled and with a bow, he arched a flirtatious eyebrow, "Would you like to dance gorgeous?"

I blushed and beamed up at him, "I'd—"

"Hello Bowser."

Mario and Luigi appeared by my side as though they materialized from thin air. Ever the hero, Mario looked perfectly cool and yet his tense stance suggested he was ready to make a move at a moment's notice.

Luigi was probably the direct opposite. He looked ready to hightail it out of there in the first sign of a conflict. Bowser's playful smirk turned into a sneer.

He growled, snorting a ring of smoke as he grinned—if that's what it could be called—hellishly, "Well, well, _well_. If it isn't the idiotic plumber brothers! Why don't you go back to school and get a_ real_ job?!"

"I'm just-a gonna let you know-a Bowser," Mario crossed his arms, "That tonight-a is about Daisy. I won't come after you-a if you don't try anything. Are we-a clear?"

Bowser snorted a small flame from his nose, "Yeah? And just who the hell are you to try and tell me what to do, shrimp?"

Although Mario's facial expression didn't change, I did notice his mouth thin into a narrow line. When Mario turned to look at me, his expression softened, "Be-a careful, eh sis?"

I chuckled, "I will Mario. Hey don't worry about me. The security is so tight in this place right now that if I sneezed, ten toads would offer me a tissue. Now get out of here and enjoy the night. I'm sure I saw Peach waiting for you by the punch bowl."

"The punch bowl?" Mario spoke softly, "Momma mia, I'd-a better hurry up before someone asks her to dance-a!"

Mario and Luigi left, with the green hero sending occasional glances over his shoulder our way. Bowser turned away from them and snorted, "Good friggin' riddance and what was that 'sis' thing about? I didn't take you as being related to plumber losers."

I laughed, "Oh it's a very inside-inside joke."

"Yeah? Why don't you explain it for those of us on the outside?"

"The joke is, Mario will someday marry Peach and I'm supposed to marry Luigi. Therefore I would be Mario's sister," I beamed.

This time Bowser _did_ breathe fire. I jumped, startled by his wild anger as a couple of bystanders glanced in our direction. His eyes narrowed as smoke poured from his mouth, "_Marry_ _Luigi?_! I should have _pounded_ that green geek into the floor while I had the chance. Where is he?! Where the hell did that skinny bastard go!?"

His stunt was starting to attract too much attention and his vicious growling wasn't diffusing the situation. As a growing throng of curious onlookers appeared, the Sarasaland chief of police, Toadux appeared within the front of the crowd.

While speculations were bounced around, he stood with a perfectly neutral face but behind his dark shades I could read the questioning look on his face.

_'Is everything okay here? Do I need to get involved?'_

I knew Toadux was armed to the tee and I really didn't want Bowser or anyone ending up tazed at my party. I nodded to Toadux; _everything's okay here. _I grabbed a massive claw and frowned, "Let's just dance, huh?"

Bowser's hostile expression disappeared and he suddenly smiled, "Heh, let's show these stiffos how it's done."

He grabbed my hand and dragged me to the dance floor. Other couples were on the floor, spinning and twisting in tune to the fast beat. Junior and Toadette danced together, laughing as they performed dances like the robot and the jitterbug.

Elsewhere Mario danced with Peach, who was glowing brighter than a fireflower. Mario smiled—laughing really—as he said something to his pretty dance partner. Whatever he said had Peach pleasantly flushed all the way to the roots of her hair.

Huh, I never realized Mario wore a dark pink shirt to, oh I don't know match Peach's primrose pink dress? Methinks a certain plumber had asked a certain princess to be his date to my _Summani_.

Oh _my._

Wendy was happily glomped onto Yoshi, beamingly wickedly as the green dinosaur looked around nervously. I laughed, thinking about the tight spot he was in. If he ditched Wendy, Bowser would kick his ass, and if Yoshi was perceived as too overly-friendly yet again it would lead to an ass-kicking.

Kamek and Kammy were dancing together? Kamek was laughing while Kammy was giving her normal sharp glare, although her face flamed with blush. I wonder what they had been talking about?

I studied Bowser's white tuxedo and a silly thought entered my head;_ we match. _It was coincidence we wore the same color but we _did_ match colors like a couple at a formal dance.

Bowser led me to the floor where we started to swing dance. I laughed as the king showed off impressive footwork. The Koopa king was getting _down_! I didn't expect such a big guy to move so fast.

He picked me up and swung me from side to side. The world blurred into a blot of indistinguishable color; I felt rubbery and boneless, as I was back on my feet for lightning fast footwork.

As the tempo of the music changed, it was time to switch dance partners. With each new song I had to change dance partners. Just as Bowser was preparing to spin me, another bachelor stepped in, took my hand and began to dance away.

Bowser's look of blatant surprise quickly contorted into rage. Smoke wafted from his nose dangerously as his clenched fists shook. I felt—more than saw—Bowser stomping over furiously; Oh _sheyt _someone's gonna die brutally at my _Summani_…

Peach intercepted Bowser with haste, curtsying then taking his hand to lead him into a dance. I think she and Mario saw Bowser's growing fury and stepped in to keep peace.

Prince charming here didn't know how close he came to getting a _serious_ ass kicking from the Koopa king. I looked at the nameless prince, exchanging polite smiles.

With each switch of the musical tempo, I changed partners. For one dance I was with a shyguy prince who had the clammiest hands and for another I was partnered with a prince who had the worst halitosis.

Another prince was too busy ogling my chest as the next kept trying to touch my hair. Before another awkward, fumbling prince could find me, Toad stepped in and saved me.

"I saw the losers you danced with," he laughed, "I thought I'd help you out."

"Thanks T. Ugh, Stars this is lame," I groaned.

"You should enjoy dancing with the best-lookin' shroom!" he beamed.'

The following dance I shared with Doomba Jr. His Father popped up throughout the entire dance cheering him on and sending winks at us. It was weird but funny because he was embarrassing the holy Stars out of his son.

Then I was in the arms of the infamous Mario. We danced 'til we dropped. I had fun trying to outdo Mario who just wouldn't let himself be outdone. It got to the point where Mario even performed a mini breakdance move.

_(Peach Gardens DS, Mario Kart Wii)_

After a curtsy, I found myself locking hands within claws as I began waltzing alongside with the mysterious Koopa prince. Yet again I was interested in finding out more about him.

He danced gracefully, steps completely in rhythm to both the music and my stride. I studied his ice-blue eyes, admiring their pale color and seconds later he was staring back.

"Enjoying your night?" He asked, his voice pleasant and deep.

"Yes I am," I chuckled, "But to be honest I'm a little overwhelmed."

"Quite understandable for anyone in your position," his cool tenor wafted over the soft music, "Hundreds of interested suitors pursuing the hand of one eligible maiden, especially an aesthetically pleasing one at that. With a woman so fetching it has made me wonder if I should have tried for her hand."

I blushed, "…Why I think that was a compliment, my prince."

Just the barest traces of a smirk crept upon the prince's face, "I assure you I do not mean to unnecessarily flatter you with superfluous accolades. I'm simply being…honest."

I laughed, "I'll take your word for it."

_He was a Koopa prince so was he kin to Bowser? He had to be. Maybe I should just ask him? _I was gawking at him a bit too long when he arched a dark blue eyebrow. I blushed, " Er sorry for staring."

"Quite alright. Unused to being around Koopa?"

"No! Not at all! I was just curious. You said you were a prince right?"

"Indeed. Can a man of common blood walk into the Sarasaland princess' event?"

I frowned, "Mario and Luigi aren't royalty."

"With all due respect," he was smirking now, "They are rare exceptions and even then they are celebrated heroes."

"Well whatever, my point is that you're a Koopa prince right?"

"Correct."

"So then…Are you…a son of King Bowser?"

A flash of something—whether it was surprise—crossed his handsome features. Then an unusual frost entered his stare and to my surprise his jaw clenched as if he was trying to reign in anger.

"Yes," he didn't quite hiss his words, I get the vibe that he had too much self-restraint for that, "He is my father."

Things were starting to make sense now; where Bowser was all flare and passion, this prince was nothing but cool detachment and being phlegmatic. Something told me their difference caused a severe rifted between them.

Now I found myself interested in their affairs, "Does he know you compose music?"

"Does he care you mean."

"Ah…" I was quiet, "Well it may not mean much but I think your music is beautiful."

His expression lightened, "…Thank you and truly your opinion does matter princess. Such accolades are always pleasing to hear."

"Also Prince Ludwig, you realize he's here right? King Bowser I mean…Also Your brother and sister are here too."

Those pale blue eyes narrowed again, "…Lord Father is present?"

"Yes."

He hummed softly to himself and with a flourish, spun me, "Well princess it was truly a pleasure to meet you. I must ask you excuse my abrupt dismissal but I must be departing rather unexpectedly…"

"But—!"

"Trust me," he replied coolly, "It is less meddlesome this way," then he gave a deep bow, "I hope the rest of your night goes well _Chkyla_."

He took my palm and planted a swift kiss. And with those words, the prince swept through the crowd. It was strange how he cut through the crowd with such graceful moments. He didn't disturb any of the dancing couples.

_(Super Mario Galaxy 2 Road to Bowser Music)_

"May I have this dance?" I blinked, snapping my head to face a new suitor.

"Ah…Yes you may," I curtsied and took his hands.

As we spun around to the tempo of the gorgeous music, I took the time to study my potential suitor: He was tall and attractive with whitish-blonde hair and sharp silver eyes.

When girls imagined a brave, handsome prince scaling a castle to save her from a dragon, _this _was the boy girls fantasized. He was tall, had a sturdy jawline, broad shoulders and striking eyes.

We glided smoothly across the floor, the prince guided with an expert hand and a feather-soft touch. Each movement was fluid and I was truly impressed. He smiled dashingly, eyes like quicksilver. Something told me he left a trail of broken hearts in his wake. His steel-gray eyes met mine, "And may I have the name of my prince?"

He grinned, "I am Prince Taurus of the Aqualands Kingdom. And how is your evening princess?"

"It's going very well," I beamed up at him as he spun me in tune with the soft waltz, "I'm trying to remember all the men I've met this evening!"

"I think you shall not forget me princess," when he smirked his silver eyes flashed, "I know you have many suitors here who are nowhere near worth your hand in marriage."

I blushed at the compliment, "Thank y—"

"Sarasaland is just starting to flourish and become prosperous as a kingdom. This _Sumanni_ event is a great idea, to present the princess to the rest of the kingdoms," Taurus spoke.

"Why do you say that?"

"Princess," he spoke in a purr as his eyelids lowered, "You are absolutely breathtaking. Any royal here tonight must be blind not to see the beauty of the desert rose before him."

"Thank—"

"And I want to let you know I am the best suitor for you," his eyes smoldered, "The Aqualands are filled with all the water your people could ever hope for."

"Are you going to keep interrupting m—?"

"Think about it, I could give you everything you ever wanted; jewels, wealth, fame; all you need is to accept me," he purred, a cool hand touching my face.

"But I really don't—"

"I could make you a queen of a wealthy empire," this time I frowned at the interruption, "A woman who is waited upon hand and foot."

Just as he was about to speak again, I snapped my fingers in front of his face. It shut him up as he blinked, coming out of a haze or something, "Forgive me princess, but where you saying something?"

I huffed already beginning to be fed up with this guy, "Look pal, stop interrupting me, it's starting to pis—vex me."

The prince raised his sandy-colored eyebrows, "Did you just call yourself, correcting my demeanor?"

"You bet I did," I frowned; the longer I danced with him, the harder it became to reign my anger in and keep my temper from flaring viciously.

The prince chuckled, flint-gray eyes flickering as a smirk unraveled on his pretty face, "So the sayings are true. The princess of Sarasaland is quite the spitfire. You know when people say that, they mean you're a bitch. There's truth there."

I bet my nostrils flared as I felt my blood broil in fury and before I would do something I'd later regret, I went to pull away from him. However Prince Taurus simply held onto me tighter. He all but crushed me against his frame as he grinned at me. I tried to tug away from his grip but I truly did not wish to make a scene.

I knew I had a great amount of eyes watching me and honestly I wasn't going to raise a fuss over this loser.

To even fool others further, I smiled falsely to appear that I was happy, "You let go of me right now." I hissed through my teeth.

_Or else I will savagely smash my knee into your face._

"So this is the princess of Sarasaland," he whispered, that insufferable smirk of his present, "How charming. Our time here might be done but I shall be seeing you in the future. Look forward to seeing you again, Daisy. And next time we meet, learn some manners will you?"

"_You _learn some damn manners you insufferable-!"

The tempo of the music changed yet again and he released me. It was more of a push as he flowed, moving gracefully to his next dance partner while I stumbled, careening wildly as I nearly fell on my tush. But my next dance partner caught me before I could fall and embarrass myself, "Whoa! Easy there Mama Daisy! We don't want ya to fall and dirty up your pretty dress!"

The last residue of my anger disappeared when I looked down and saw the beaming Junior, "BJ! Hey!"

"So," he wiggled his eyebrows, "Are ya ready to boogie on down with the most handsomest guy here, Mama Daisy?"

I laughed, "You better believe it Junior!"

Bowser Junior did his best imitation of a bow as I curtsied. And soon we began to prance around to the orchestra's fast musical tempo. This round of dancing was even more showy and silly than my dance with Mario. Junior was breakdancing on his shell by the dance's end as I laughed loudly.

With one last wave from Junior, I found myself in the arms of another royal. I was so startled by King Boo's sudden appearance I almost screamed.

"_Pardon me princess, but may I take a rather hasty rain check on my promised dance?"_

"Uh sure…"

"_Superb," _King Boo smiled sinisterly.

To say the least it was very _weird _to dance with a ghost of all things. I could feel where his hand was on my back because it felt like an ice block. Despite the spooky, creepy feeling he was actually a pretty good dancer. And I decided to tell him this.

_"Why thank you Princess,_" his voice was velvety smooth, _"I've had quite a few years of practice after all."_

"Like how many?"

_"After five centuries I stopped counting," _King Boo chuckled.

I stared at him wide-eyed, "Uh, no offense or anything but don't you feel that I'm a bit…uh _young _for you?"

_"Absolutely not," _King Boo chuckled, _"I've always appreciated marrying a younger bride."_

I almost gagged, "Wait, so you've been married before?!"

_"I've been married at least twenty two times," _King Boo stated nonchalantly, as if he was speaking about the weather, _"Alas, all of my brides have died all before I. My last bride died in 1907 from ghastly cholera. I agree with my councilors, it is high time I settled down and found another."_

I gulped, "Well, your last bride was older than my grandmother..."

_"Ah yes, I remember Queen Meringue when she was your age," _King Boo chuckled_, "Very bootiful as well; blessed with a long lineage of good genetics you lucky girl."_

"So uh…how long have you been dead for?"

_"Why that all depends on your definition of dead is," _he was smiling in that creepy way again, _"I have not had my human body since the early 1500's but I never truly lived until I became a ghost."_

I the longer I spoke to this guy, the more and more frightened I became. I'm sure he has some really interesting life stories but he is as creepy as they come! What were the councilors thinking inviting him!?

_"But before this dance is over, I would like you to know this Princess," _the ghost was purring, _"I think you are quite exquisite and I would love to get to know you better…"_

"I-I'll remember that…"

_"I hope so," _the ghost narrowed his eyes, grinning, _"I wouldn't want to take drastic measures. You'll find that I'm quite sensitive when it comes to the matters of the heart. And I'm afraid I'm taken by you. Hopefully I won't have to do extreme things such as say….oh, shove an unfortunate plumber _back _into a picture again…"_

I blinked, "What did you just—?"

_"Farewell Princess." _And with a haunting cackle, King Boo vanished in thin air.

I stared at the spot he had disappeared from. Likes seriously! Who invited that guy?! Sometimes I have to wonder what illegal substances my councilors are on if they invited that guy as a potential suitor…

_(Peach Ice gardens, Mario baseball)_

I shouldn't have been surprised when another newcomer approached me, "May I have this dance princess?"

I beamed at the show of manners, "Why thank you and yes you may."

The young man began to lead a series of graceful, intricate steps. I peered at him and my brain stopped working; he was handsome. He was tall, lean and had gorgeous facial features to rival Prince Taurus. Although his dark hair was wild and shot in multiple directions, it seemed to iterate he wasn't stuck on himself.

He was dressed in black silk and smelled wonderful, something subtle and earthy like pine. He looked down at me with a gentleness that was so rare in males my age.

"Enjoying yourself Princess Daisy?" He had a deep, smooth voice that made my face warm.

"Yes I am," I beamed up at him, "And how about you prince…?"

"Clan leader actually," he smiled softly, "Please call me Ryu. Informality is more comfortable."

"Well then Ryu, it's nice to meet you."

"The pleasure is all mine," he smiled, midnight blues bright, "I know you have probably received this a lot tonight, but you look stunning."

I blushed flagrantly and shyly averted my gaze. Ryu chuckled, arching a debonair eyebrow, "Ah and the lady's modest as well. How rare to find a woman both beautiful and modest."

"Well truth be told," I spoke softly, "I'm really not all that delicate, I'm very tomboyish."

I don't know why I felt inclined to tell him this but I could trust him. I received very good vibes from this Ryu guy. He seemed solicitous and well-bred; like a man who always thought before he spoke. Also his eyes and hands didn't rove. Oh yes and it didn't hurt that he was _extremely_ handsome.

Yummy even.

Ryu chuckled, the sound of his laugh was deep and smooth, "Oh really? Well it's always good when a woman has a bit of fire to her."

As he twirled me, my hand accidentally brushed against the strong plains of his stomach. My face flushed; _Stars almighty_ I could feel finely shaped abdominals beneath the black silk shirt.

_Yikes._

He was built like crazy! Stars, you could probably wash shirts on those abs! And because of my warped mind, I suddenly pictured myself holding a yellow shirt ready to lather up and scrub it clean on the clan leader's gorgeous, sculpted abs.

_Hehehehe, liquid or detergent my liege?_

"Princess?"

I froze, snapping out of dreamland. My hand still rested on his middle. I gasped, pulling away as if he burned. He elevated an eyebrow and chuckled, "Something amiss princess?"

"O-Oh no," I blushed hard, "Just a bit flushed from all this dancing."

"I see," Ryu spun me then slowly dipped me backwards.

As the other dancers continued to float around the ballroom, Ryu still held our position. He peered at me with those electric blue eyes. With each passing second my face seared hotter.

_Oh Stars_ I think I'm swooning. How can a guy simply use his eyes and tell me how much he was interested in me?!

"Well Miss Daisy," Ryu all but purred as those pretty blue eyes shone, "I'm afraid our time is up. I'd love if you remembered this fool and saved him another dance."

I laughed, absolutely charmed, "I will Ryu."

He set me onto my feet. As Ryu drew back, he faintly brushed a hand across my stomach. I gaped. The smoldering gleam set his eyes afire. He leaned forward to whisper into my ear, "That was payback from _earlier_, princess."

Red-faced I spluttered, "I-I-I…It was on accident!"

As we switched partners, he bowed before moving to Peach. They began to dance with effortless grace and fluid synchronization. Peach's eyes darted between Ryu and I several times before she elevated a curious eyebrow and raised a sharp grin.

_'What's going on with him?'_

Smiling, I shrugged my shoulders and that seemed to make Peach smirk. Her pretty blue eyes narrowed a bit, _'You _will _tell me about him later.'_

I stared after the gorgeous clan leader in a happy, sparkly nonsensical daze then someone clear their throat. I spun around and froze.

Great Stars in Star Haven it was _Waluigi._

The only possible way he could have gotten in was to _sneak_. He was still wearing his usual overalls and cap but they were black and he even had a black thief mask around his eyes. And was that a black cape he had fluttering behind him?

He was grinning down at me with some sort of dark satisfaction. If I didn't get out of here now I was going to kill him. I was going to strangle that tall, lanky bastard right here and right now if I didn't get away from him.

I made a hasty retreat over towards Mario, who was smiling and dancing with Toadette but before I could grab the hero's shoulder, an obtrusive arm wrap around my waist. As I was dragged into _his _chest, I heard his wretched chuckling.

"My, my princess, is this any way to treat a guest of the Sarasalandian palace?" He smoozed, spinning me deftly.

"Oh I agree," I snapped, finally swaying to the music, "this wouldn't be any way to treat a guest of the Sarasalandian palace, it's the perfect way however to treat a pervert! How did you even get in here!?"

"Why Princess Daisy, I am hurt that you think of me so," Waluigi was still grinning a terrible, slippery smile, "I simply appreciate beautiful women and you are one of them."

I snarled, "If you don't get away from me in two point five seconds I'm going to—"

"Do what?" he snorted, "Cause a ruckus and ruin your little party? Why don't we enjoy one dance together? I can tell a lot of hard work went into planning this, so let us not cause a scene."

"And what?" I grunted, lowering my voice when I realized a few of the security guard's heads snapped in my direction, "Am I supposed to forget all those times you—you...you…!"

An oily grin spread across his mug, "Did what now?"

"Your wandering hands asshole!" I hissed through my teeth.

He chuckled darkly, "Has anyone told you how beautiful you are when you're angry?"

My glare sharpened.

"Could you blame me?" he was grinning, laughing a bit even, "Have you _seen _what you look like? I know your kingdom's having rough times but if you wanted to fundraise some money, I suggest you put on a show at a gentleman's club. That deficit would be gone like _that._ Frankly I would pay good coin for front row seats of that show._"_

I growled, flushing at his insulting, moronic idea as he continued to laugh, "I'm joking princess…well _partially _anyways. If you didn't blatantly ignore me, I wouldn't have to resort to extreme measures to get your attention."

I narrowed my eyes, "Well why don't you just say 'Hello!' Like everyone else! Luigi says hello and guess what? I listen! Try not being a jerk!"

Finally the humor disappeared from Waluigi's face and I was surprised he even growled, "Well _princess_, in case you haven't noticed I'm _not _Luigi and therefore I don't get all the privileges he's allotted."

I raised an eyebrow, "And what kind of privileges are those?"

"Think about it," Waluigi grinned, eyes narrow, "The pansy can come visit you without going through _any _security protocols, he can be _alone _with you. Hell, you can go to his _janky_ pipe house and have no one worry that he'll bid you harm."

I frowned, "Well that's because he's proven himself over all these years."

"Wrong, _Mario's _proven himself over the years and Luigi just got the free benefits with it. Red hat is the actual hero, not him," he hissed, "But you say if I prove myself as good, then I can come around eh?"

"You've got _years _to make up for," I snorted, "Good luck with that."

"I'm a changed man," Waluigi grinned, "You'll see!"

"Oh brother…"

"Watch," Waluigi enclosed me in his arms, "You will see I have changed my dastardly ways. So now maybe you will learn to be nice to me."

We stood in the middle of the dance floor unmoving, I glared into his angular face as Waluigi grinned. The tempo of the music changed and with no further attempts to anger me, Waluigi tipped his black hat with a wink before he disappeared into the crowd.

I was stunned; what? No vulgar language? No attempts to cop a feel?! His behavior was really weirding me out. I stared after his treating form in morbid curiosity. I felt someone place a soft hand on my shoulder.

_Stars I swear, if this is Wario—the only man I'm more repulsed by than Waluigi—I'm going to bust some nuts. I WILL find a blunt, rusted knife and I WILL go around—!_

_(Sherbet land- Mario Kart wii)_

I turned around and grinned when I saw, "Luigi!"

Without a second thought I grabbed his hands and began dancing. He looked confused as I took the lead. I know, usually guys lead and girls follow but it felt strange to follow. Luigi chuckled and began to follow my tempo, "You-a look wonderful Daisy-a."

"Thank you," I then smirked at him, "And you look pretty snazzy yourself Weegee."

"Aw thank you-a," he blushed, smiling largely, "Mario and I-a rented a tux, nothing-a as special as you. You-a look _fantastica_!"

"Thanks. So are you having fun Lulu?" I beamed.

"Now-a that I have you I am," he smiled back, twirling me with his usual gentleness.

I smiled at him as we continued to waltz in step with the gorgeous orchestra music. He sent me into another spin before he pulled me close to him, "I think-a you're really special-a Daisy."

I blinked up at him, "I think you're great too Weegee."

"I…I mean that I like you Daisy," his face was tomato-red but he looked serious, "I think-a you're really special-a and I like how fiery you are….and…and I would-a like to—"

"_Ladies and gentlemen, the next dance we would like to reserve for the emperor and his daughter. Would everyone else please take their seats_?"

Luigi looked uncharacteristically frustrated before letting go of my hands. He gave a bow and left alongside of Mario, who had been happily watching our exchange. A spotlight appeared as the guests swept to the side of the floor. Father approached, walking with perfect posture and head held high.

He gave a low bow as I curtsied respectively. He took both of my hands and we were soon gliding across the dance floor. The melodic chords filled the air as the spotlights glowed soft mauves and periwinkles.

_(Shooting star summit, paper Mario)_

I looked up and met Father's cool eyes. Under the spot light they shone purple, "So how is my precious daughter?"

"I'm having a blast Father," I laughed, "I'm surprised you haven't tried to put a stop to it yet. I've met some interesting suitors and some that were just plain…weird…"

"Hmm, I should let you know that both your uncle and grandmother have been telling me to 'relax a little' and I'm afraid not quite in those words either."

"Oh really?" I laughed, "And yet you took their advice?"

"I suppose I had to," he sighed, "I found myself becoming exceedingly overprotective when I saw..."

"Saw what?" I smiled.

His eyes opened and he spoke softly, "When I saw how many young men were enchanted by my lovely little girl."

I blushed, "Oh you must be mistaken."

I was surprised when Father smirked, "_Chisana _you must learn to accept compliments, especially those that are true."

Still embarrassed I agreed without fight, "Ah...Y-Yes Father."

His expression became serious, "This is your _Sumanni_. And when the day comes for you to choose who you shall give yourself to as a bride, I want it to be your choice and not that of the council."

"…Father…"

"There are times when we must do for ourselves _Chisana_," he whispered, "The only way I found happiness was through marrying your mother even when the council did not wish me to."

I blinked; what? Why wouldn't anyone want my mother as the queen of their land? Mother was kind, soft, and demure. A perfect wife and queen to anyone's standards.

"Why? Mom was beautiful, smart, kind, elegant…" I shook my head in disbelief.

As we waltzed, floating across the floor Father continued, "The council did not want me to marry your mother. They thought she was not befitting as a queen. She was the daughter of a mayor of a small village."

Wasn't...good enough? My mom?

"The council disliked the idea of their future ruler marrying a peasant girl with no traceable royal lineage, no wealth and a complexion that was nowhere near milk-white."

He smiled, "When I first met your mother, I was traveling to the Moo Moo Meadows to bring new dairy businesses into Sarasaland. When I was led to the mayor's house I saw a young woman tiling the fields."

I nearly gasped at the love-struck, dreamy haze that flooded his face, "The first thing that caught my eyes was her hair. She had a gorgeous curling mass of cherry-red hair. She was a commoner, dressed in nothing but a plain work dress and field boots. But there was something about her and I was drawn to her against all reason and sense..."

My mother, who was always impeccably dressed in beautiful, flowing purple gowns...Was originally a young, poor farm girl? Why had I never known this? This was my own mother!

"She had a beautiful bronze complexion and the deepest sapphire blue eyes I had ever seen. And from that moment on, I knew I loved her."

I was stunned, I thought my mother had been a princess of a small city, not a simple daughter of a town mayor, "But Father…"

"Whoever you choose to love," he narrowed his eyes, "promise me you will marry for love. I would have been miserable without my Rose. Please listen to fa—daddy and marry for love."

"…I will."

When I looked at Father, it was as if I was looking at a different man. The emotions were clearly etched upon his face and not hidden behind his severe mask of composure and etiquette. His eyes glowed with such a melting intensity that I was startled; I had never seen such open, unchecked emotion flicker across father's face.

He softly cupped my face, fingers brushing my cheeks. His blue eyes blazed like wildfire and yet his words were soft like a dove's breast, "_Yi mira simili mi Rozza._ You look so much like my precious _Rozza_."

Rose, I look so much like my mother. Who had been nothing but a beautiful peasant girl, the daughter of the mayor of a small farm town. She was a woman who was coveted and loved by a prince of Sarasaland.

Was that why the court ladies scorned me so? Cutting their eyes and jaws clenching whenever they saw me? Was it because they knew my mother didn't have a single drop of royal blood in her? Was it because when they saw me, they saw a peasant princess?

A princess who held none of her father's aristocratic features and all of her mother's serf features? I didn't stop him when he pulled me into a hug, "I may have lost one of my flowers but I will not lose you _Chisana_. My darling _Chisana_," he whispered into my hair as he held me tight.

I didn't realize the dance was finishing and the music grew softer. Father bent over and pressed a petal soft kiss into my hair. I blinked as the soft applause of the crowd flooded the floor. I looked Father who gave a soft smile.

"Remember my words _Chisana…" _He ran an affectionate hand through my hair.

He turned away, facing the crowd and no longer were the blues of his eyes wild and bright with passion as they had been seconds ago, but they were the cool, iced ceruleans of the secure, equable Emperor Sakuro.

"I am pleased to announce my daughter will now choose her top three suitors for a final dance," Father looked at me, "Princess Sarasaland if you please…?"

I blushed as the stares honed on me intently. Even King Boo suddenly appeared at the front of the crowd, grinning sinfully. I gulped; it was so hard to choose just three men out of like fifty.

My mind raced, scrambling to think of the top three, most pleasant princes/royals I had met for the night and the first suitor I chose came to mind easily, "Firstly I…I would like to have a dance with, His lordship Ryu."

Ryu materialized from the crowd smoothly. The moment we met stares, my temperature rose. Ryu placed his hands together and bowed.

I took a second deep breath before I made my next announcement, "For my second choice…Um…I would like…my dear friend Luigi Mario."

I heard an explosion of cheer from the audience; of course the majority of the crowd knew who Luigi was. Mario grinned, laughing favorably as he slapped his brother on the back and gave him a thumbs up as Yoshi and Toad gave him a noogie. Peach looked particularly happy at the choice as she wrapped an arm within Mario's.

I thought of my final choice and knew without a doubt who it would be, "And for my final choice I would like to share the last dance of the evening with a new ally and good friend; his lordship King Koopa."

The crowd went silent as Bowser stepped forward with a self-satisfied, insidious grin. There were a few awkward, scattered claps here and there but nothing loud enough that could be called applause.

Although both Junior and Wendy were cheering loudly; Koopie, Parry and Auntie Lina were happily cheering for their king as well. Kamek pranced around happily as Kammy stood tall, looking as proud as a peacock.

For one song each I danced around the floor with my honored choices. The spotlight dimmed romantically as the rest of the guests quietly settled into their seats. Ryu walked over with smooth strides and with a bow took my hand. I smiled at him and began twirling around to the soft, beautiful melody. Ludwig was leading the DoReMi orchestra as he waved his hands in a flourish.

As we continued to waltz around the entirety of the floor, I happened to catch eyes with the Koopa Prince. Hands still in motion from conducting, Ludwig peered down at us. I smiled up at him as he nodded before returning his concentration onto his music.

The dance with Ryu was lovely as he skillfully led me around on the floor. And don't even get me started, because every time he looked at me with those electric eyes, my heart pounded wildly.

The next dance with Lulu was less mind-wracking and I had fun spinning around the ballroom with him. In between the spins and dips we would do something silly like the hand jive or old disco moves. Just as the music slowed to an end, Bowser stood at the edge of the dance floor, watching our every move.

Lulu gave me one last spin in tune with the music before he walked me over to Bowser. With each step I took closer to Bowser, his grin grew bigger and bigger.

Grinning roguishly, Bowser quickly ran a comb through his fiery mane and arrogantly straightened out his tux. Once satisfied, he slapped the comb into the chest of an unsuspecting servant and crossed his arms, grinning maliciously.

Luigi delivered my hand into Bowser's and bowed. Lulu threw one last wink before taking a seat next to Mario, who was beaming happily. Bowser pulled me closer and grinned, "You ready to turn this place out Flower?"

I laughed, "Let's do it Bowwy."

_( Mushroom Gorge Mario Kart wii)_

Dramatic music flared to life as we began to glide across the floor. Bowser swung me around as if I weighed nothing. A chorus oh 'oohs' and 'ahs' rose as the Koopa King spun me around effortlessly in a dexterous show of strength. Soon the crowd of spectators even began to join in and clap, adding an extra flare to the already lively music.

Unlike all my other 'suitors' Bowser spun me around in multiple circles, twirling me until I couldn't tell up from down. He even tossed me overhead. I laughed, the heady rush stealing my breath. Then gravity turned its tide as I fell and moments later thick arms enclosed around me safely.

Just when my head started to swim, Bowser pulled me close. We continued our manic pace, hopping, twirling, leaping; it was a blast.

"Having fun Princess Sarasaland?" He purred, grinning.

"Yes I am, O great king of the Darklands," I beamed, smiling back.

"Damn you're a gorgeous lil thing," he smirked, allowing a rumbling purr to infiltrate his deep voice, "Looking at you makes me wanna _drool_."

His steady stare made me blush brightly, "Well you're looking quite sharp this evening too. I'm surprised you know formal dancing."

"_Please_, King Bowser knows _everything_ he needs to when it comes to sweeping women off their feet," he winked.

"I didn't think I'd have fun tonight," I spoke to him as we continued to glide around the floor, "But I'm very glad you came, even if I only got to spend two dances with you."

Bowser half-shrugged, "I'd have wanted more time with ya, but this Soo-money thing wasn't all that bad. Your food here was pretty damn good, your grandmother told hilarious stories, and I got to cream old man Apricotto at a drinking contest and now he's _sloshed_!"

I laughed at the thought of my drunk uncle. Actually that might be a scary thing. He could be even more spontaneous and out of control than usual.

"Thank you for coming Bowser," I spoke to him softly, smiling a bit shyly, "I'm so happy you've come here for me. I know we didn't spend much time together but…secretly I felt better the moment you showed up."

"It's my pleasure to dance with you pretty lady," he purred back, eyes smoldering, "You just say the word Flower and you know I'm there."

_(Rainbow Road, Mario kart Wii)_

The spotlights glowed warmly as the music began to soften. In the purple spotlights Bowser's gaze was melting as we slowly swayed from side to side. The adoring glow in his eyes had me blushing, stomach knotting. His claw rubbed gentle circles on my back, massaging and teasing.

"Have you…" Bowser fell silent for a moment before he purred, "Have you ever wondered what you'd be doing five years from now?"

I grinned, "Kind of a random question isn't it?"

"Maybe," he chuckled, "But in five years, heck maybe even a year from now I know what I want to see."

"And what's that?"

"I want…you."

"Huh?" My head snapped up.

"I-I mean," his face bloomed red, "I want you by my side...I-I want you in my future."

I smiled at him softly, "Of course I'll be there. I'm your friend, I'll always want to be near you."

Bowser's incredulous expression darkened. He growled audibly, mane standing, "_Friend?_! You think I want…" then he sighed exasperatedly, "Sometimes I have to _wonder_ if a part of your brain doesn't work. I'm confused, how in the hell did that go over your head!?"

I frowned, "Huh?"

The overwhelming sense of frustration evaporated from his posture. I was floored by how gentle his expression became, "Never mind, just come closer to big papa you stubborn, naïve, beautiful girl."

I gasped, probably flushing to the roots of my hair. His touch was feather-soft as his eyes admired, glowing with rare warmth and depth. As the music slowed to an ending, Bowser twirled me one last time and dipped me backwards. Just as the lights went black, Bowser moved closer.

Though my cheeks burned, I closed my eyes too. The faintest touch of warm breath caressed my face.

"Flower…" he growled softly.

My heart sped up at the sensation of breath on my damp lips. He lightly touched his lips against mine and I felt as if I would melt. A large round of applause snapped us both out of our stupor and suddenly the lights were back on. Everyone was on their feet, clapping and cheering.

Bowser set me back on my feet as he bowed. I was so embarrassed that I nearly forgot to curtsy. Oh goodness, what if everyone had seen that? Father walked towards the middle of the court and stood beside both Bowser and I. While I was too busy being flustered, he shot Bowser a sharp look.

Father raised his hands and spoke, "Friends, family and citizens alike, we of the house of Sarasaland would like to thank you for attending my daughter's wondrous _Sumanni_. The brilliance and wonder of this event could have only been brought out by our hardworking staff and of course by your attendance. I would like to—"

The sky suddenly flashed a deep, brilliant white and the next thing I know—heads turned and hushed whispering fell silent—the ground shook. As the chandeliers overhead rattled ominously, a chorus of startled gasps and cries rang out. A loud_ boom_ sounded and the ground trembled ominously, knocking guests off of their feet. I cried out in shock as I felt myself fall.

Chaos ensued as screams filled the ballroom and the thunder of stampeding footsteps only added to the growing turmoil. Sprawled on the floor, I could only watch as people fled. I looked around the crowd, searching for any of my friends; Peach, Mario, Luigi, anyone. What in the world was going on?

For a moment I thought of calling out for Father but as my panic began to peak, large arms scooped me up and I felt myself being gently lowered onto my feet. I screamed, swinging my fists and trying to break free until I heard a familiar growl. Bowser stood over me protectively, using his shell as a shield.

"Bowser," I whispered to him, eyes round with fear and form trembling, "What's going on? What in the name of the Stars is going on!"

"I don't know Flower," he growled, "But I'm not letting anything happen to you."

I felt him wrap his arms around me tighter and I wrapped mine around him. Even with the ground shaking and the castle moaning as if it were alive, I felt safe within Bowser's arms.

"Are you scared?" I heard him ask softly.

"No…"

He chuckled and I felt his laughter reverberate through my own chest, "Liar, I can feel you shaking. It's okay Flower I've got you."

Bowser kept his promise and held on to me as the tremors kept rattling my castle. It seemed like eternity and a half when the tremors and the screaming stopped, Bowser finally let me go. He rose onto his feet and delicately pulled me onto my own two legs. He held me by my shoulders, staring into my eyes, "You all right Flower? How are you feel—"

Bowser halted in the middle of his sentence and blinked, realizing that someone had suddenly come up near us. Standing beside us was Father, who came to stand before me. And with Father's appearance, Bowser's claws disappeared from my person as if he'd been burned.

"Stars in Star Haven," Father cupped my face within his palms, "are you all right daughter? I tried to find you, but Toadux wouldn't allow me to move."

"I'm…I'm okay Father," I smiled at him weakly.

Father squinted speculatively at Bowser once more, analyzing the Koopa king without saying a word. Bowser, who I've never known to like scrutiny, slowly straightened up, eyes narrowed. It was almost déjà vu from their first meeting.

I peered between the two of them, unsure; what in the world was going on with them!? Were they sizing each other up!? Was this some kind of macho male thing!?

But before Bowser could speak, Father beat him to the point, "King Bowser…You protected my dear daughter, I was watching. The guards pulled me into their protection and I couldn't get to my daughter but you, you stood with her and made sure she was okay."

Father's face grew stern as he slowly placed a firm hand upon Bowser's shoulder, "Thank you…King Koopa for protecting my rose."

Bowser smirked and clasped Father's hand on his shoulder tightly, "No problem, Emperor. If you can't tell, I kind of have a thing for your girl. But you knew that already, didn't you?"

I flushed as Father narrowed his eyes, gauging Bowser speculatively, "...Is that_ so_?"

"Well that's—"

A messenger approached Daddy. And instantly his face was placidly calm. Father turned to look at Bowser and me, quietly excusing himself. While Father may have went out of 'hearing range' for me, Bowser was a Koopa and his hearing was more than keen enough to pick up everything that was said easily.

"A meteorite fell out of the sky and into our desert?" Father asked, face perfectly placid and eyes sharp.

"Yes your lordship. We already have the Sarasalandian royal guard at the site of touchdown but…perhaps you should investigate it yourself."

"Very well then, I shall go at once."

"Father what happened?" I flounced over to him and seconds later I could feel Bowser come right beside me, "What was that?"

"Princess I want you to stay here. I shall investigate what is going on—"

"No," I shook my head at him, "I wish to go too."

"As this is your _Sumanni_, leaving before the guests would be highly inappropriate and—"

"Father, the guests are leaving now. Most of them have cleared out when that catastrophe shook our castle! I want to go and see what is going on!"

Father's blue eyes froze over, "Do not shame me and act like a petulant child, princess. You will wait here and you will follow my instruction."

At the sound of his acerbic order, I felt tears prick at the edges of my vision. I tried to blink them away but it was annoying they blurred my vision. Why couldn't Father let me go and investigate with him? What was so dangerous out there that I was unsafe trying to uncover what fell from the sky!

He was trying to treat me like a child! I just had my _Sumanni _that recognized my status as a woman and here he is still treating me like a little girl. Without another word, Father began to follow the security guard out of the ballroom. I watched forlornly as Father left.

I clenched my trembling fists, biting my lip to reign my disappoint and building anger. Bowser stepped forward and looked at my dad, "Emperor Sakuro."

I was surprised when Father stopped and turned to face Bowser, "Yes King Bowser?"

"Her majesty would like to accompany you out on this excursion," I blinked when he gestured at me, "Perhaps if I offered to protect your daughter then you would consider it safe enough for her to attend?"

Father stared hard at Bowser before he looked at me. I don't know what was going on in his head, but he seemed to be weighing the pros and cons of the matter.

"As your new _ally_," Bowser all but emphasized the word, "I would insist—no be _honored_ if you would give me the duty to protect your daughter. I would be oh so_ highly_ offended if you did not accept, king."

Father narrowed his eyes just the slightest bit at Bowser's words. But then released a deep sigh, "I do not wish to offend you, my new friend. We shall head to the site at once...as soon as the princess is dressed properly."

Bowser looked at me and chuckled, "Well I think she looks more than fine."

I blushed as Father's eyes honed in upon Bowser like a hawk. Although he didn't say anything, the blues of his slanted eyes were frosted like a stone in snow.

"I…I will prepare myself now. But Bow—er—King Bowser what of your son and your daughter?"

"Don't you people have security? They're Koopas so they'll be fine until I get back," Bowser shook his head, "Now hurry up and get dressed so we can go headhunting."

I looked at Bowser and mouthed, 'thank you.' He winked and as I scurried down the hallway, he crossed his arms and turned away, staring into the night sky with a blank expression. His advisers suddenly appeared by his side, "Hag, Geezer, I'm about to ride with Emperor Sakuro and Flower for a bit. Watch over the crown prince and princess 'til I get back. I shouldn't be long."

"Of course your lordship," and with that they both disappeared to find their charges.

Bowser turned back to stare out towards the desert. The desert sky was nearly pitch black, but far off into the distance he could see the glow of lights, probably from the set up campsite. The longer he stared at the sight, the more pronounced the twitch in his left arm became.

It was the exact same tick that developed the night those Ninji attacked Junior and Flower and it was the same twitch he felt when that danged Exxor sword fell from the sky into _his_ keep. And the whole time he spoke to Fawful his left arm had the next thing to a seizure. His eyes narrowed as he growled softly to himself, "I got a real bad feeling about this…"

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><p>Alice: Oooh, such a long chapter _ But there were so many princes! ^_^ And the Koopa twins! XD Lol! Review please! Stay tuned for part two of the Summani! ;)<p> 


	12. The Summani Part two

Alice: OMG! Everyone loved being apart of my award squad! Why with that many people, we can take over the world! Reviewers and readers rise UP! As we come together to take over the world! …Hot wings promised to those who show up before eight pm!

Ultrra: (Facepalm) -_- …

Alice: Anyways, part two of the Summani! Also did anyone in the last chapter notice the 'pink haired' servant girl?

Ultrra: (Looks around)…Uh yeaaaah? Why?

Alice: Because she's a second Mario sports character introduced! ^_^ She's the 'white mage'! Anyways, we'll keep this AN session short.

Ultrra: Wow really? You feeling okay? Are you sick/dying/sad/depressed/angry?

Alice: O_O No, I don't think so…

Ultrra: (Snorts) After all the crazy charades going on last chapter, this seems so calm.

Alice: Too calm?

Ultrra: Yes…

Alice: (Looks around as only crickets chirp)….

Ultrra: (Shrugs and kicks feet up on a desk)…

Alice: (Whispers) I don't think anything is gonna happen.

Ultrra: Huh…I guess.

Alice: Uh, well anyways please enjoy! R and R! ^_^

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>Much to Lady Angora's dismay, I had hurriedly shed my gown, removed my glittering flower gem from my hair and pulled on a hardier desert robe emblazoned with our family's royal crest upon it. I thought about wiping my makeup away, but I looked so enchanting and decided to leave it on for a few more hours.<p>

I pulled on cream-colored leggings, heavy duty boots and dashed through the halls. With the opening of one last door, I found myself outside where a swarm of chattering guests were gathered. I looked around, trying to spot any sign of Father or Bowser.

While security was going around taking roll call, I went into the midst of my guests who were speculating what had caused such a great tremor to pass through our castle. I noticed a group of Sarasaland court ladies and immediately turned the other way; no _way _in Star Haven was I going to speak to those catty, overbearing hens.

"Princess Sarasaland!"

"Daisy!"

I turned to see my family running over; this caused just about everyone and their mother to turn and look my direction. _Well, so much for keeping a low profile._ Peach, Uncle Apricotto and Grammy all but squeezed me in a family-style bear hug. I actually had to pinch, yes _pinch _my Uncle to get him to let me go.

So while I greedily gulped in oxygen, Peach spoke.

Well, more so blubbered than anything.

"Daisy!" Peach sobbed, why was she crying? I get that she's tendered hearted but really Peach? She used a lacy hanky and dabbed at her tears, "Oh Stars I was so worried about you! We looked around outside and didn't see you!"

"Peach…please don't cry," I spoke, "I'm fine see? In one complete piece."

"My little _Pichi _is tough," Grammy nodded proudly, "It would take more than a measly earthquake to take her out."

"Hmm," Uncle tapped his chin thoughtfully, "I agree, probably something along the lines of molten lava."

"Lava's a bit much, Apricotto…"

"Fleet and ice then?"

"Ah, there we go. A princess of the desert wouldn't know how to combat snow."

I gaped in stupor; okay so while Peach was crying about nothing, essentially my grandmother and uncle are talking about what natural disasters will end me. Stars why couldn't I have a sane, normal family?

"Daisy are you-a okay?"

Now the Mario brothers came over, and so were a bunch of other groups of people. _Sheyt, soooo much for being low profile._

"_Princess Sarasaland_," King Boo materialized yet again from nowhere, _"You scared me to death."_

Terrible pun, anyone?

"Princess Sarasaland are you okay?" Some nameless prince showed up beside me, "Are you alright?"

Then another, "Princess Daisy? My goodness you're okay!"

And another, "Stars in Star Haven! Are you alright milady?"

I could almost scream with all the attention I now had; people were enclosing in around me, squeezing and packing around tightly. While the clamoring crowd was enfolding in, each person trying to get as close to us as possible, I found myself beginning to feel a tad bit suffocated.

"Back off! I asked if she was okay!"

"No I did!"

"I talked to her first!"

_"All of you human fleas desist or I will throw you all into paintings!"_

The once, curious onlookers suddenly turned aggressive and I found myself being separated from my family. The last traces of Peach's blonde hair disappeared within the wreathing mob as suitors closed in on me. I was startled; someone was literally pressed against my back, and the crowd was beginning to become rowdy.

"Princess!"

"Princess over here!"

I gasped as someone actually touched my hair and then another person felt my arm and the next my leg; Stars I have to get out of here before I'm molested or something! I called out loudly, hoping my voice wasn't drowned out over the loud clamor, "Mario! Luigi! Help!"

Faintly, "Princess! I'm-a coming!"

"Momma mia! Someone-a grabbed my butt! My _butt!"_

Just as someone grabbed my waist, I shrieked angrily, throwing elbows and even donkey kicking, "Let _go_ of me before I kick you where the sun doesn't shine!"

Almost as fast as I had been picked up, I was abruptly dropped. I blinked, staring wide-eyed at a pair of huge, scaly toes. I looked up to see Bowser holding up some nameless royal by the back of his jacket. The crowd had moved far away from us, staring on in silent awe at Bowser's strength.

"If you don't mind champ," Bowser's gruff voice spoke, "I'll be taking her now. Is that good with you?"

"N-Not at all K-King Bowser," the human royal squealed.

With a chuff, Bowser dropped the poor sap right on his rear. I thought I heard Bowser mutter a soft, "Punk". The Mario brothers appeared at the edge of the crowd, ready and standing at attention. Bowser turned towards me and grinned, before slowing pulling me to my feet.

"You've got to watch yourself, Princess Sarasaland," he purred, arching an eyebrow, "You make us guys do some crazy things."

I blushed, staring at him not knowing what to say. His smile grew more crooked and I felt face growing hotter. Someone cleared their throat and I saw Father stepping beside us along with the Mario brothers.

"Quite a scene we've got here," Father spoke.

His blue eyes narrowed as they honed in on Bowser's arm resting on my shoulder. He arched an elegant eyebrow as he honed in on my closeness with Bowser. I blushed and scooted a bit away from the Koopa lord. If Bowser noticed, he didn't say anything, although he did cross his arms.

Father turned and spun to face the crowd, "Esteemed guests, I must inform you all that the Sarasaland court apologizes for this inconvenience. We hope that you have enjoyed your evening, and will provide free lodging for all guests within Sarasaland. I, along with the Mario brothers, will go and seek out the disturbance. Councilor Salini will look after the lodging for our guests."

And just like that Councilor Salini began to speak, "Thank you Emperor, now then, Sarasaland is more than willing to provide for her guests. Please approach us and we shall take care of your situations…"

"We are ready to travel, princess," Father spoke, "The Sarasaland council thought it would be a good idea to bring the heroic Mario brother duo along."

I turned and grinned; Mario smiled and tipped his hat as Luigi did an over embellished bow. Bowser on the other hand looked like he wanted to hurl. Father turned to Bowser and even though he spoke placidly, his eyes glowed, "King Bowser…our arrangements don't bother you, do they?"

"What do you mean?" He growled.

"With the Mario brothers traveling with us, I hope no conflict shall arise?"

In a flash second, Bowser and Mario caught eyes; red and blue caught in a clash of violence. Unblinkingly eyes were narrowed into sizzling glares; their stare down was downright venomous as they said absolutely nothing. Finally Bowser snapped his head away, eyes shut tightly as he spoke through gritted teeth, "I…have…no….problems Emperor."

I almost laughed; he sounded as if his tongue weighed thousands of pounds. Father nodded his head and looked towards an approaching figure. It was the head of security, Toadux, "Your majesty the sand mobiles are prepared and our team is ready to lead you," the toad in heavy armor saluted him.

"Thank you Toadux," Father turned to look at Bowser, the Mario brothers and I, "King Bowser, princess, Mario, Luigi, are you ready to go?"

"Yes father."

"Sure."

"Of course-a your majesty."

"Yes-a sire."

We followed Toadux to where there were several brand new sand-cyclers parked. Father straddled onto his and I hopped onto mine. I almost grinned at the confusion upon Bowser's face as he tried to make sense of them, "Is this thing big enough to hold a muscular, manly king Koopa?"

Toadux smirked and looked at Bowser over his shoulder, "Our GX3 series sand-cyclers can support nearly eight hundred pounds. You should be no problem your kingship."

While Father checked the fuel gauges, I tried not to laugh at the rare sight before me. Mario, Luigi and Bowser were busy trying to figure the bike out. I had ridden these since I was ten and knew them like the back of my hand. In fact I knew how to drive a sand-cycler before I could drive a car.

Toadux and a couple of officers went over to the Mario brothers and began to explain the sand-cycler's workings. Bowser growled softly, pushing buttons at random as he tried to figure things out. Chuckling, I leaned over and gave him a 'crash course' on how to operate our rides.

He was a quick learner, and I watched happily at the way his crimson eyes glowed in fascination as he learned how the bike's mechanisms worked. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head as he clicked buttons and pulled levers.

"So rev the handle bars once to get it goin' and rev twice to move?" he asked me again.

"Yes and the further you lean on the handle bars, the faster you go," I smiled at the dangerous glint in his eyes.

"Hmm, sounds delicious," Bowser studied the sand-cycler he was on, "We might have to buy some of these for the Darklands if they prove to be useful."

I laughed, "I think you'll enjoy the ride for sure."

Snapping his helmet on and visor into place, Toadux turned around to look at us. All at once the entire royal guard's bikes roared to life, "READY?"

"Emperor Sakuro," Mario smirked, "You-a sure you can ride one-a of these things?"

"Young man, please," Father scoffed, "Do not insult me; I've been driving sand-cyclers before you were born. Worry about yourself, hero."

Mario laughed as Father gave his chief officer the okay. He nodded his head and I gave a thumbs up. Toadux nodded curtly and turned forward. With a twist of his handle bars his own bike roared to life, "ALLRIGHTY! LET'S GO!"

The royal guards exploded into motion and seconds later I cranked my handlebars and felt my sand bike beginning to move. For a few miles we drove slowly, letting the Mario brothers and King Bowser adjust to the ride of the sand-cycler. It wasn't long before we were zipping through the desert at high speeds. I laughed happily, loving the feel of the wind coursing through my hair and wrinkling my robes.

I saw Mario's sand-cycler hop over a sand-dune, catching serious air as I heard a happy, "Yahoo!"

"Amateurs," Toadux spoke to Father, "They always have to try fancy moves their first ride out."

"Of course."

Out of my peripherals another sand bike appeared, popping a wheelie, "WHOOOOOA YEAHAHAHA!"

I laughed at the pure ecstasy upon Bowser's face. Sand flew behind him in a shower as the motorbike's engine roared loudly. Bowser was grinning hellishly, yet he looked as if he was having the time of his life on the sandbike.

"WOOOOOO BABY!" he laughed, continuing to do many different kinds of tricks, "Show Papa what ya got!"

I chuckled at his antics, and in the corner of my eye I saw father watching him, simply shaking his head at Bowser as if he were acting like a fool. I looked forward and immediately the pleasure wiped off of my face. Just at the start of the horizon, I could see the site where the meteor had touched down.

There was a huge gaping hole that looked unnatural in our desert sand; how was that even possible anyhow? I shook my head and continued to ride on. It must have even unnerved Bowser a bit because he fell unusually silent.

We pulled to a halt as soon as we were twenty feet away from the site. I could see a swarm of paleontologists working to uncover any evidence inside the gaping pit. We stepped off of our rides to get a closer look. While a head of the operation informed Father and Toadux on the findings, the Mario brothers, Bowser and I clambered closer to the site and stared into the massive crater.

It had to be at least hundreds of feet deep. Police, archeologists and paleontologists were all together, working as a single force inside of the deep trench to uncover its mysteries. I could only gape in awe; I can't explain why but I have a bad feeling about this…

"Huh that's kinda weird," Bowser scratched at the top of his head, "I thought things sank into sand, not…you know, carved holes."

"This is-a strange for sure," Mario replied, brows furrowing.

I barely realized that Father rejoined us. Father shook his head; the only thing that gave away his concern were the wrinkles between his brows, "How is it even possible to create a crater within _sand_? I feel that an unnatural force is behind this…"

"I feel the same way, Emperor," Bowser growled, his mane standing up, "I can feel it and for some reason it's really pissing me off."

"HEY! I FOUND SOMETHING!"

All heads snapped towards the exclamation and soon there was a flurry of excitation, anxiety and urgency as the horde of workers began to migrate towards the new discovery. Even in the face of a newfound sighting, father stayed perfectly neutral as he watched the others roam towards the large digging site.

As everyone moved, Toadux suddenly materialized out of nowhere beside father; now I understand why Father made him head of security. This guy had Ninji-level skills! Toadux placed a hand to his heart and inclined his head in respect before he spoke.

"One of the diggers has discovered something, your grace," he spoke to my father, "Shall we bring him up..?"

"No," father shook his head, "We shall come down there to him. Lead us to the floor of the site, Commander Toadux."

"At once sire."

The six of us took a makeshift elevator to the bottom of the site and let me tell you it was scary! The whole ride down on the makeshift elevator was rickety and creaky and I expected the cables to snap at any moment.

One of the workers apologized profusely claiming that if they knew the king and princess were to ride the elevator that they would have installed the best. However all nerves were on edge when Bowser stepped onto the elevator. All the workers were concerned that Bowser's weight alone would snap the cables of the elevator.

So father, Toadux, the Mario brothers and I had went down to ground zero first and in a second shift Bowser was brought down. Once together on the ground—and safe—we approached the find. It wasn't surprising that Bowser grumbled, complaining about the uneasy elevator ride.

As we all strolled through the site, workers inclined their heads, bowed, or saluted us; well the military officers saluted us anyways. At ground zero we were instructed to place on construction hardhats, and Father and Commander Toadux obliged without a second thought.

As I slid my hardhat on, I felt a bit foolish for wearing a hat over my crown but then I grinned at the Mario brothers who also wore hardhats over their plumber hats. I looked over at Bowser to see how he was getting on with his hardhat.

When two workers approached Bowser, pleading for him to wear a helmet, the king Koopa simply presented them with his meanest snarl, growling loudly. Seconds later they ran off, trembling as Bowser managed to be the only one permitted without a hardhat.

"We're getting closer your majesty," Toadux spoke, "Now we go into the earth and see the meteorite for ourselves."

We all stared into the deep trench that had to span at least several meters into the earth. It was well-lit with fluorescent lightning, nearly blinding almost. With cables and harnesses strapped to our person, we all trekked to the bottom of the pit. With each breadth and with each inch we traveled deeper, I began to feel uneasy.

The deeper we traveled, the colder the environment became. A looming sense of foreboding grew as we continued deeper and deeper into the pit but I couldn't explain or justify my feelings. There were no lurking phantoms waiting to get me and there was nothing tangible that I could see or feel.

But the uneasy, churning and knotting of my stomach said otherwise. I glanced over at Father and Toadux, both who seemed completely unperturbed. The Mario brothers themselves looked confused as well. Bowser's face at the moment was unreadable as we continued to trek lower and towards the heart of the burial site.

"Great Scott," I heard Toadux's hushed voice as he spoke to his king, "Do you _feel _that my lord?"

"It's rather unnerving," Father spoke softly, "The feeling of unearthing something we shouldn't be, like digging up a grave."

"What in the hell is down here," Toadux grumbled softly.

"I don't know-a," Mario said, "But it's really creepy…"

"M-Maybe we shouldn't have come down-a here," Luigi gulped.

Then we all fell silent, perhaps too anxious to continue even talking, pondering about the ill sensation we were all experiencing. Whatever it was, it was something unholy lingering here. Even while Father and Toadux had talked, I found it a bit odd how Bowser remained silent, frowning deeply. I wonder what he was thinking.

I shot a quick glance his direction to read his facial expression, but that was no good. He was perfectly stoned-faced, eyes hidden in shadows of darkness. Once we were at the bottom of the basin, there we saw a few diggers hovering around the object of interest and at our arrival they quickly moved away.

They looked just as freaked out as we did, and they seemed to cling to us, as if having us around would be a shield of protection for them.

"Y-Your Lordship, there is the object," a digger whispered, "This place…I don't like the feel of it, and I think it has something to do with that thing in the ground."

"Thank you for your diligence," Father nodded his head, "We of the Sarasaland Court appreciate your superb work. There is something uncanny about this presence and we are truly gracious you had to endure this unnatural manifestation for our sakes."

Father took a pair of gloves from a nearby worker, and slipped them on as I peeked around him. There I saw a partially unearthed slate slab of stone. Wait, so it wasn't even a meteorite? We came all this way to see some slab of stone?

Can anyone say let down!

"You best hurry your lordship," the second worker spoke softly, as if afraid of angering some unseen presence, "I don't think it's good to stay here too long."

"I second that my good man," Father spoke with a reassuring tone, "I shall make haste then."

Bowser and I exchanged questioning glances as Father slipped closer to the tablet. With the utmost care, he gently reached down and retrieved the tablet. One of the archeologists swept away access dirt with a small brush to give Father the ability to read better.

With a trembling hand, a digger shone his flashlight over Father's shoulder and onto the slab tablet. Father's eyes scrolled over the writing, touching each letter as he slowly tried to decipher the message, "Hmm. Just holding this tablet feels…terrifying."

"What is it your kingship?" I asked softly.

A foreign light entered Father's eyes, making them seem opaque like aquamarine gemstone as he spoke in monotone, "It's as if something is…existing…no sleeping within this tablet, simply binding its time until it is ready…ready…I am not the one it seeks…"

"What do you mean Emperor?" Mario frowned, "You're-a not making any sense."

"I am not the one it wants…" Father continued to drone on, "I am not the one…It shall bid it's time…Bid it's time until it finds the one…"

"This is getting-a creepy," Luigi gulped, "What's wrong with him-a!"

"Emperor! Emperor!" Mario yelled, even snapping his fingers before Father.

"Father?" I frowned, "Dad?"

As Father continued to ramble, mumbling on about nothing that made sense, we were beginning to all become worried. Commander Toadux stepped close to Father and placed a hand on his shoulder, shaking him a bit as he did so.

"…Emperor Sakuro?" Toadux questioned lightly.

Daddy blinked, as if the fog had been lifted and he gazed around at us. Everything came back to him and although his voice seemed a bit shaky he was quickly regaining control, "…I? What? Oh yes…the tablet…"

"What was that about?" Bowser asked, "Sounded like you were under a spell. Frea-ky if you ask me."

Father shook his head, "I do not know, King Bowser. It was as if my mind was bombarded—"

He cleared his throat, "—Anyway, the lettering is crudely engraved into this stone, as if it was not carved with a sophisticated tool," he spoke softly, but I can read, ' Zards a_d _low_s do not b_g t_ge_h_r.'"

Mario hummed thoughtfully, "Maybe we should-a figure this out, but not-a in here. Not in this-a ditch. It feels really-a creepy."

"Second that," Bowser said, tugging on his harness, "Let's get the hell out of here."

"Couldn't agree anymore with that," Toadux spoke.

So once we were returned to the surface with the tablet, we tried to figure out the crudely carved message. With the combined brain force of the royal guards, we were able to piece more of the puzzle together. After awhile it started to feel like we were playing the wheel of mushroom fortune or something.

"That-a word is 'and' for sure," Mario spoke.

"Together!" Bowser snapped his fingers, "that word is 'together'!"

"I believe this word is 'belong'," Father spoke softly.

" 'Zards and _lowers do not belong together'," an archeologist scratched at his chin, "What doesn't belong together?"

"'Flowers'," Father said, "'Flowers' and something else…"

I continued to rack my brain looking for all the words that could possibly fill in this last blank. Bowser was beside me, glaring at the tablet as if he could scare the answers out of it. I could tell when realization dawned upon him, because at first he looked surprised. Then his face grew into a twisted, furious sneer.

The snarl that ripped from his throat was audible and made everyone at the site jump. Mario arched an eyebrow as Luigi huddled a bit behind his big brother. Father simply looked up at Bowser, placid and composed as usual, "Does something trouble you King Bowser?"

Bowser picked up and clenched the tablet in his trembling hands. I took a step away from Bowser at the sheer amount of fury and hostility that was roiling within him. Smoke wafted from his nostrils and I thought I saw licks of flames coming from his mouth.

What was wrong?

"This tablet…" he growled, his trembling grew worse as he tried to reign in his rage, "It says, '_Lizards_ and flowers do not belong together'. _Lizards_."

The expressions of fear and distrust upon the faces of the archeologists and diggers changed into knowing and even sympathetic countenances. Even the Mario brothers looked disgusted, knowing how strong the epithet hurt the Koopa race.

"How vile…"

"What disgusting words of hate…"

My Father stepped beside Bowser and slowly removed the offensive tablet from his hands. Father stared at the stone plaque then looked up at Bowser, "I am sorry you had to read such filthy words of hatred. While you are in the borders of my kingdom, you are safe knowing that such sentiment within these borders is prohibited. We of Sarasaland will never feel that way about your kinsmen."

Even though his teeth where still bared from the fury of such an insult, Bowser looked up and met the eyes of my Father. His ire seemed to cool off a bit and he gruffly said, "Thank you."

"Under such circumstances I would have such a sordid article destroyed," Father handed the plaque to Toadux, "However it remains to be evaluated under more extensive care. I am sorry if that fact will upset you, king."

Bowser snorted, "As long as you can promise me by keeping that damn thing around that it'll led us to the deadman who wrote that, then I'm game Emperor."

"We shall investigate matters further and let you know of our findings," Father nodded his head, "I do not know what this means…but I have a _strong _feeling about this."

"Sire!" Toadux saluted, "Would you like us to continue searching the site?"

"Of course and please notify me immediately if anything of notable importance is located."

"Yes sire."

As Father was speaking to Commander Toadux and the rest of the retrieval staff, I turned to face Bowser. Even though he looked mildly miffed, his clenched fists shook as a show of his suppressed anger. I touched his arm and noticed how badly the muscles in his arms clenched.

I was surprised how he even jumped a bit when I touched him. His head snapped around and the muscles in his arms tensed as if he were ready to fight. In a placating gesture I stepped back, hands raised and that seemed to cool his ire.

"Erm…S-Sorry about that. I didn't mean to snap like that…"

"Hey, are you okay Bowser?" I asked him softly.

Bowser snorted, "Yeah…that stupid thing just about pissed me off though. I_ hate_ that word. It's something used to make us Koopa feel inferior."

I rubbed his arm soothingly, "Yeah I know. I'm sorry some people still think that way. It's them not _you_."

Bowser growled softly, leaning towards my touch, "Assholes…"

I laughed, "I know they are. But don't let them get to you, okay big guy?"

He grinned at me suddenly then tightened his bicep and locked my arm into a stronger grip, "There _is_ a way you can make it better…"

"Yeah how so?"

His eyes narrowed and he beamed devilishly. I realized that he was starting to draw both his arm and myself closer to him, "You could kiss me better. Now come over to daddy and give me some suga—"

As Toadux left to bark his orders, Father turned to face Bowser and me. I snapped around, blushing hotly as I knew what he was going to say. I hope Father didn't catch that! Nothing about his facial expression said that he had heard Bowser's ridiculous suggestion. Bowser chuckled to himself, probably at my embarrassment.

Mario and Luigi approached alongside of Father. Mario looked at us with suspicion as Luigi yawned tiredly.

"King Bowser as I realize that it is getting late, the house of Sarasaland would like to offer you and your kin quarter for the evening. We would be more than fortunate to have you stay as our esteemed guest for the evening," Father spoke as crisply as usually.

"Sure," Bowser grinned, "I think I would like to check out the digs of your castle. I'm guessing that you have no problem with my son and daughter being present too, right? Also my two most trusted advisors."

"The house of Sarasaland delights in the company of children," Father nodded his head, "And your advisors are welcome as well. We shall retire at your will."

"Then let's go," Bowser grinned at me, "A Koopa can only be nice so long when he's deprived of his beauty sleep."

I turned to look at the Mario brothers, "Are you gentlemen staying the night at the palace as well?"

Both men spluttered at the same time, then fell quiet. Luigi spoke, "We have a nice hotel-a to go to."

"You sure you don't want to stay?"

"It's-a fine Daisy," Mario smiled, "Besides, Peach-a and the king, Yoshi and Toad-a are waiting for us-a."

* * *

><p>Sakuro watched as policemen escorted both his daughter and King Bowser back to the Grand Sarasaland palace where the Mario brothers were escorted to a five star hotel for the evening. In the wake of their sand-cyclers, a large tawny cloud of displaced sand roiled in the air slowly. The Emperor spun to Commander Toadux who had waited for him away from the hordes of paleontologists and construction workers.<p>

The less ears around for what he was about to say, the better. Sakuro approached his chief police officer, "I want that tablet to be placed into a chest, under the highest vaults of security with have in this kingdom. Make sure no one will touch that…thing."

"Of course, but if I may ask…Sire what was that trance about?"

"Trance?" Sakuro asked.

"Yes, back in the trench where the tablet was buried," Toadux continued, "When you picked it up…You…went into this trance. Frankly it scared the holy Stars out of all of us."

Sakuro stared past Toadux's inquisitive face and off at the blackening horizon wearily, truly troubled about something he knew so little about.

"That stone," the emperor spoke in a dark voice, "it _spoke_ to me."

"Spoke sire?"

Sakuro wanted to laugh at Toadux' question; while the incredulity in his voice was as apparent as sun in daybreak, in respect for his reigning monarch, Toadux had tried hard to make his question sound completely neutral.

"Yes _spoke_," Sakuro whispered, "I…I heard a voice telling me that it did not seek me, I was not the right…person it desired."

Sakuro shook his head, knowing just how deranged he sounded reciting such a tale. But how could he ever forget what he heard? When he held the tablet in his hands, it was strangely icy cold to the touch. The stinging, biting frost bled through his padded gloves as if he wore none.

Then when he heard it, the wonderful voice, the stone became pleasantly warm. The voice itself was smooth, honeyed, rich and pleasing. It was trying to find someone it wanted, someone it was looking for. It wanted someone who was special. But somewhere, behind its honey laced words and soothing tone, it was _hungry_.

It was stalking for its prey, looking for the one person who could satisfy its hunger. The smooth, charming voice that lulled him into a state of comfort and relaxation was decadent and violent, promising to do whatever was necessary to find its prey.

Sakuro looked back at the chief of police, still trying to find how to even describe his experience, "Stars Toadux, the voice seemed so…tranquil, so pleasant and mellifluous, but behind that, the amount of insanity and chaos swarming was…"

"Troubling?" Toadux sounded just as perturbed as Sakuro thought he should.

"…Suffocating," Sakuro frowned, "We will look into this…tablet later, for now we shall have it secured in a chest and stored under heavy surveillance. Until I can figure out what the…entity is in that tablet, then no one shall be allowed near it."

"…Of course sire."

"Please watch over camp here, I must bid both my daughter and King Bowser a goodnight."

"Yes your lordship."

* * *

><p>By the time the Emperor was back home, he found his daughter and King Bowser in a living room, swapping stories over a cup of tea and pastries. Still unnerved from his experience with the voice, the emperor decided to usher the two to bed; he had much to ponder over.<p>

The regal emperor approached his daughter and the king, trying to ignore the sly way _that _Koopa was smiling at his daughter. Stars, how long had King Bowser been so smitten with his innocent daughter? Twenty years ago he would kick Bowser's tail for giving his daughter such a look.

But alas that was twenty years ago when he was young and reckless. It wouldn't do for a man of his age to try 'kicking ass.' If he tried anything he'd probably throw his back out. Daisy and Bowser looked up at him, and Sakuro tried to hide the tick his left eye developed.

_If that Koopa doesn't remove his hand from her shoulder…_

"Good evening King Bowser," Sakuro tried not to spit out the young Koopa's name, "Our servant and friend of the royal family Toadette will show you the way to your room for the evening."

"Thank you, your majesty,"_ that_ Koopa's growl was so deep, the emperor almost missed his words.

The Koopa rose to his feet, towering over the emperor effortlessly. Sakuro stood at a tall six feet even; it was a bit unsettling to see someone two feet taller dwarf him comically. The emperor nodded his head stiffly.

_I shouldn't leave them alone. What if he tries something? What if he tries to 'get frisky'? Stars I'll kill him. I'll castrate him with a rusted spoon…_

Elegant and equable as always, the emperor bowed, "May your stay here be pleasant, King. Mind your manners and have a…good evening."

In other words, _'This is my house and I have eyes watching you. Try anything with my daughter and I'll personally remove the spines from your shell.'_

* * *

><p>I was surprised when Bowser actually bowed back, "Night to you too Emperor."<p>

"Rest well princess Sarasaland."

I curtsied, "Goodnight Father."

With that Father turned in a flutter of cream robes and swept out of the room like a fresh breath of air. His long, beautiful robes trailed behind him as he disappeared from sight. Bowser grinned down at me archly, "Did you just _curts_y! Stars I never thought I'd see a tomboy like you ever do something that womanly."

I frowned, "For your information, within these palace walls I'm still seen as a girl and so I still have to pretend that I'm the daintiest woman in the world!"

Bowser guffawed, "Oh now that's rich."

Like all good servants, Toadette suddenly materialized from out of the shadows and nothingness. Smiling softly, she bowed to both of us, "King Bowser I would be honored to show you the way to your room. For the evening. Please follow—"

"Oh _Tooooooadette_!" a voice sang.

Popping out of one of the hallways, Junior's grinning face appeared. He was grinning like sin as he trounced over to her. He must have come out of a love-haze as he blinked, realizing that his father and I were present.

"Oh, hey King Dad! Heya Mama Daisy!"

"Sprat, what have you been doing here?" Bowser asked.

"Uh, I've been hanging out with Toadette, King Dad."

Bowser squinted an eye at his son, "You didn't get into any trouble did you?"

Junior shook his head, "N-No King Dad! I was my bestest! Honest! You can even ask Toadette!"

"He was fine your grace," Kamek appeared with Kammy by his side.

"Find anything of interest?" Kammy inquired.

"I'll tell you guys about it when we get back to the Darklands," Bowser waved it off, "You're both dismissed for the night."

"Yes your grumpiness."

With that, both of the magiKoopa disappeared. I wish I could do that! Just imagine all the mess ups and screw ups I could get out of! Just boof! And then I'm gone! Seems like it would work well for pranks. Hmm, yes, I'll have to look into that later with Kamek.

"Ready?" Toadette stepped forward and smiled.

"Hmm," Bowser rubbed his chin as he studied Toadette, who suddenly glowed red under the king's gaze, "Not bad. She's pretty cute Junior. Bet she'll become a looker when she's older."

Bowser chuckled as both Toadette and Junior glowed a charming shade of red. I exploded with laughter at how _hard _she blushed. While I was laughing my head off, Toad turned and glared at me, pouting cutely.

"Wait, I'm missing something," Bowser suddenly snapped his fingers, "Something pink, dainty but monstrously loud. Where's Wendy?"

"Well," Toadette replied softly, "her majesty Princess Wendy was doing my hair before you and Princess Daisy appeared."

Well now that she mentioned it, Toady's hair was no longer up in her usual two pigtails but fell softly upon her person like rose silk. She should have worn her hair like that to my _Sumanni; _she looked beautiful!

Like a blossoming…cherryblossom!

…

Don't judge me!

"Oh Stars, she's doing it again: giving people makeovers they don't need!" Bowser muttered under his breath, "Well as long as she's here with Brat Junior and the mini cutie, then It's alright."

With another blush, Toadette looked mortified, "T-Thank you K-King Bowser."

I laughed but made sure to save Toadette from herself, "So could you lead King Bowser and Prince Junior to their rooms for the evening T?"

"O-Oh yes of course princess," Toadette curtsied before she turned to Bowser and Junior, "If you please?"

Toadette walked off with Junior happily following after her. I watched the two of them go, disappearing after taking a turn down one of the long halls.

Wait, I counted two, where's Bowser?

"So my gorgeous little Flower," Bowser took me up in his arms, grinning down at me, "Don't you want to finish this evening the right way?"

"The right way?"

"A kiss from a handsome king?" he chuckled as my face burned.

I spluttered unintelligibly and Bowser shook his head in amusement. He set me back onto my feet and looked at me with the softest expression I had ever received from a male before, "Well you have sweet dreams my queen."

"G-Good night to you too Bowser…my dear friend. _Mi Golgo_."

"Gogo?" he tried, blinking dumbly, "What's a godo?"

I laughed, "_Golgo, _it means 'Koopa.'"

Bowser purred, "Oh baby!"

"Do you want a hug or not!" I tried to hide my laughter at the way he wiggled his eyebrows.

I met him halfway and wrapped my arms around him in a hug. I was rewarded with the unmistakable rumbling of his purring. As he held me in his arms, I felt my heart flutter happily. I smiled, inhaling the normal smoky scent that seemed to fragrance him.

He gave me one last lingering look before he stomped off after Toadette and Junior. I watched him disappear around the corner before I headed to my room. At the thought of my magical night I smiled. All the great dancing and the wonderful food we had. And then all the time I spent with Bowser.

I smiled. _Mi Golgo_.

My Koopa.

* * *

><p>'<em>What was that my little desert chiffon called me? 'Mi Gobo?' My Koopa eh? Why is my princess starting to warm up to me a bit? Am I sweeping her off her feet already? Making her dream about a handsome, tall, smoldering hunk of a Koopa?'<em>

"Here is your room, Lord Bowser. Princess Wendy is already resting inside."

Toadette slipped the door open and curtsied as Junior tore into the room. The king glanced around, studying the Sarasaland royal suite; hmm not bad actually. The digs here were nowhere near as glorious as his palace, but it was still pretty good. Everything in the room was a royal, flashy deep gold. The comforter was a silky golden hue that matched the elegant drapery.

The suite had a walk in closet and a luxurious Jacuzzi-like bathtub; one that was barely big enough to contain King Bowser's masculine form. He saw Junior happily jumping on the bed, performing an impressive feat of flips. For a moment Bowser was proud, knowing that he had taught his son those flips.

But when he thought of how they were in the Sarasaland palace as guests, it would look bad to have his son bouncing around.

"Brat Junior cut that out," he growled, "Act like you've had some home trainin' or something."

Still grinning, Junior stopped, "Aye aye captain!"

With a harder look from his father, Junior chuckled, "I mean, yes King Dad."

The Koopa prince leapt off the bed and went to continue his exploration, happily running around the room. Lounging on a loveseat, Wendy simply shook her head at her youngest brother's antics. She rested on her stomach, flipping through the pages of a high-fashioned Sarasaland magazine.

"Like what a little brat, eh King Daddy?"

"Be nice to your brother," even though Bowser said that, he still grinned over at his daughter.

"Okay, I will but wasn't tonight amazing?" Wendy rose to her feet and waltzed around the room with an invisible dance partner, "The music was so pretty and all the boys there were cute! Especially that Yoshi!"

"Yeah it was nice and—_WHAT!_?" Bowser snorted smoke when the 'cute boy' segment finally registered in his brain, "_Yoshi_? That puny green…_Yoshi_ of all things! I don't even think he talks!"

"Like of course he does, King Daddy," Wendy rolled her eyes as if dealing with a child, "He just isn't used to speaking in the human tongue. He told me his tongue is too heavy to speak in their language."

While the king was stewing over what he thought about Yoshi, Wendy looked up at her father a bit skeptically, "Did you see Luddy? Big bro stopped by just a few minutes ago and said hi to us."

"Yeah!" Junior was hopping around excitedly again, "Luddy was even conducting music at Mama Daisy's dance party! And then he came by and talked to Wendy and me for a long time!"

"It's a _Summani, _not a 'dance party,'" Wendy snorted, rolling her eyes, "And it's 'Wendy and I' you little twerp."

Bowser froze, frowning deeper; _Ludwig_ had been at the event?

Stars, he did _not _want to go there tonight of all nights. The tumultuous relationship he had between himself and his eldest child was a headache better saved for another night. He already had too much stress; even an ultimate badass like him needed his sanity.

However it was good though that Ludwig had visited his brother and sister and managed to tactfully avoid him. Bowser didn't miss the way Wendy's crystal blue eyes honed in on him as she awaited his answer; unfortunately his children were more than aware of the fact that he and Ludwig did not get on very well.

The King Koopa tried to play it cool as he nodded his head, "That's good. How is he doing?"

Wendy narrowed her eyes, "He's fine. Thought you'd be happier that he's been named one of the most brilliant minds under twenty-one."

Bowser blinked, "He was?"

Wendy scoffed softly, shaking her head, "You _need_ to talk to Luddy, King Daddy. You need to talk to your _son._ I like, get that he's different from you; sophisticated and thoughtful. Luddy may pretend that he's uncaring and cold-hearted but he's _still _your son."

_A son who absolutely detests my entire being._

"Right," he nodded his head, knowing he was telling a bold-faced lie, "I'll call him after this whole thing settles down. Did you enjoy your night, Sweetshell?"

He hoped his sudden topic change was too bold, or else Wendy would call him out on it. Wendy must not have noticed because she suddenly smiled sweetly, thinking about her magical night. Her soft expression morphed from angel to devil in two seconds flat, "Say King Daddy, wasn't like Dai just gorgeous tonight?"

Bowser sighed dreamily, "Yeah she was…"

"And didn't you just enjoy holding her in your arms? She smelled so heavenly…"

In his mind's eye a picture of Daisy materialized. She was dressed in the flowing white gown she wore during the _Summani_, like a goddess with waves of sparkling red and and brown hair. And the sparkling bejeweled flower she wore behind her ear was pretty, but it didn't glimmer brighter than her eyes.

"Yeah she did…"

"And like wasn't it upsetting that you didn't get to kiss her?" Wendy tried to hide her laughter.

"Yeah it—" Bowser paused, halting before he could admit the truth and he cut his eyes as his daughter, "Okay _missy_, I think you've done enough dancing and dreaming of these so called 'cute boys.'"

Wendy's smirk grew, "Like who knows? Maybe I'll make one of them my boyfriend!"

The Koopa princess all but laughed at the utter horror upon her father's face. It was so fun to rile him up because he overreacted to every little thing that dealt with the opposite sex. Wendy had long learned of her precious status as a 'daddy's little girl' and since she was her father's only daughter, she grew to own it.

When she was young and couldn't possibly understand why her father babied her worse than her brothers and was overprotective, she found it annoying. But as she grew older and soon learned about the miraculous amount of power she had over her father and it was a power that none of her brothers could _ever _access, she loved it.

It soon became clear that she had the great and powerful Lord Bowser wrapped around her little finger. Every now and then she'd have to tolerate when he called her those ridiculous petnames like 'Pookums' or 'Sweetshell,' or something.

But truthfully she saw that her father's doting upon her honestly made him happy just as much as it made her too. Wendy was her father's Pookums and needed special treatment and all the protection she deserved while with his sons, those seven other knuckleheads could make it on their own.

Yet again the telltale sign of her father's anger appeared as smoke wafted from one of his nostrils. Wendy shook her head, still smirking at her father, "Oh King Daddy calm down, I was joking around with you."

"Hmm," his eyes narrowed, "Well I think it's time you went to bed. Make sure to take your hyperactive brother with you."

"You expect me to share a room with him!" she gaped, "I'm like a blossoming young lady and he's still a little boy. He wouldn't understand why I'm so womanly!"

Bowser thought he'd laugh that time; Wendy was almost thirteen but nowhere _near _'womanly' as she described. Truth be told, the thought of his daughter maturing into a lady scared the _hell_ out of him. Wendy, who was already pretty as an adolescent would become beautiful and that meant little male Koopalings would start trying to date her, and having fantasies about her and wanting to mate her…

Bowser almost openly snarled at thoughts

"Well keep your shell on whenever he's present and there won't be any awkward moments."

"_King Daddy_!" Wendy squealed stomping her foot and this time the king Koopa did explode with laughter.

"Now take Brat Junior and shoo."

Wendy rolled her eyes and all but yanked her brother off of the curtains he had been trying to scale. As she carried off her baby brother, he hung limply in her arms.

"Huh, where are we going Wendy?"

"To bed," she huffed.

"Wanna play a game with me?"

"No."

"I'm not gonna be ordered to bed am I?"

"Yes now stop asking all these stupid questions."

"Well," Wendy stopped before her dad, "I'm like gonna go stay in the suite next door, night King Daddy."

As she walked towards the door, Bowser bent down a bit to allow his daughter a kiss on the cheek and rubbed Junior's head. The king grinned down at his only daughter, "Good night princess, and nighty brat Junior."

"Nighto King Dad!"

"Nighty!" she waved before she left, shutting the door softly behind her.

"Night King Dad!"

"…I said night once already squirt."

Once Bowser was sure his children were locked into their suite, he moved towards his luxurious guest bed. It was nowhere near as large as his at home, but it'd have to do. The jovial expression he wore in the face of his children evaporated like smoke and he was left with a sneer upon his face.

He could remember holding that stupid tablet in his claws and he could remember how furious he was at being referred to by that horrible word.

Lizard

And yet that wasn't even the worst of it. The tablet, when he held it in his talons alarmingly conflagrated to life. The tablet grew scalding hot under his talons and _seared_ him. And then there was a voice, a shrill-maniacal sounding wail that reverberated painfully in his mind.

It was happy, aroused almost that it had finally found him, and when Bowser realized who it was speaking to him, he nearly smashed the tablet right then and there. The voice was ecstatic, moaning in ecstasy about the millions of ways in would cause him pain, drink his blood, slaughter his children, and how it was going to strip him of all the strength, power and affluence he had.

But when it spoke about his Flower and all the ungodly torments it would unleash upon her, Bowser had to all but slap the tablet into Emperor Sakuro's hands there least he destroy it. Bowser knew exactly who the voice was while Emperor Sakuro and the rest of Sarasaland where several steps behind. Kudos to the emperor for having his best minds on the case to decipher the relevance of the tablet; Bowser had noticed something that they had all missed.

The culprit had scribed his initials into the tablet. Bowser remembered it was _his _signature carved into the stone. And probably with his own talons.

DB.

Flowers and Lizards don't mix? It was a clear sign, a warning that he ought to stay away from his Princess Daisy. Bowser snarled; first he sent the Ninji and now he interrupted a _Sumanni_? Something told the Demon King that he wasn't going to stop until he got what he desired. And until that moment, these things were going to simply escalate.

Until he dethroned Bowser and took the Darklands for himself.

* * *

><p>In the middle of the night a slim figure stood, arms crossed impatiently and eyes closed in a mental meditation. He was miles outside of the Grand Sarasaland palace where the princess had her celebrated <em>Summani. <em>His contact should have finished up in the palace at least two hours ago.

Then there it was, a slight shift in the energy, the world around him and he knew she had arrived. Ice-blue eyes snapped open at the first sound of another presence. Standing ten feet away from him was the woman, beaming at him impishly, "Sorry for the hold up big guy! But there was a lot of good food in the palace and I couldn't pass it up."

The woman cooed happily, taking out some kind of éclair and took a large bite into it, emitting a soft moan of bliss. She grinned, arching an eyebrow as she offered the half-bitten éclair towards her guest, "Want a bite?"

The Ninji leader narrowed his eyes, partly in disgust and partly in irritation with her lax professionalism. The said woman had offered him a pastry that she had just chewed. As the pastry hung in her hands, some kind of creamy filling plopped into the sands beneath their feet.

The Ninji leader frowned, his eyes returning to the woman's face, which wasn't that much better than the unappetizing pastry itself. On her cheeks was a smear of chocolate, and there was even a ring of chocolate over her mouth.

All the ninji could do was shake his head; he had waited two extra hours, not because of a problem but because she wanted to gorge herself with calories—fatty calories ontop of that.

"I suppose it's too much trouble to expect a timely arrival?" He said softly.

The woman continued to smack on the pastry, "I'm here aren't I?"

"True, however several hours late."

She licked her fingers, having eaten the pastry completely and either she ignored the ninji's stolid glare or just didn't care, "Oh loosen up Red, let's just get this over with, I need my beauty sleep."

"You've delivered the threat?"

Under the dark curtain of night and the soft light of the moon, the only visible feature of the woman before him was her unusual pink hair. She wiped her face clean with her white sleeve, and straightened up to stand a bit more professionally; pulling her skirt down and fixing her hair.

Then her demeanor was perfectly straight, as if she hadn't just ripped an éclair apart brutishly before the ninji warrior. He barely noticed when her eyes narrowed, "Yes, yes it's done, now can I go?"

"Not yet, we have to be sure—"

She stamped her foot and groaned, throwing her head back, "Ugh! I just want to go and be done with this!"

She was whining like a little girl that was being denied her favorite toy. Sometimes the Ninji leader wondered why his Master placed his faith in such a childish, immature woman. She had the mental capacity of a child.

"Did you plant the message for King Bowser to find?"

This seemed to have stopped the woman's tantrum. The pouted pooch of her lips thinned out into a calculative smile, "Oh yes I certainly did. Everything is going according to your master's plan."

"Good," he nodded his head, "You will be in contact until my Master will require your services again."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going now," she yawned, loudly, stretching her spine, "See you later Red!"

Then just as she came, the lady blew the ninji a kiss and disappeared into nothingness. The ninji warrior stood in the silence of the night. He looked up, admiring the beauty of the moon, "…Things are slowly coming together Master…your plan is coming to life. May King Bowser pray to Star Haven for help."

* * *

><p>Alice: Yay! Another chapter down! ^_^ Haha! Did anyone figure out the stone table puzzle before our heroes did? Figure out any of the words? None of the words? O_O ^_^ Review please my lovelies!<p> 


	13. Ginger: Time to Rawk!

Alice: My readers, reviewers, fans…

Ultrra:…Children?

Alice: And my children…(pauses) Wait what! O_O

Ultrra: (laughs) XD Got ya!

Alice: I don't have any (glares at Ultrra)

Ultrra: I know, I was just messing with you Alice! XP

Alice: (Stares)…So! We've reached a hallmark! **100** reviews! Yay! So! I've received a list of questions we will answer in honor of the 100 mark!

Ultrra: This will be interesting!

Alice: AAAAAAAAnd roll the questions!

**Alicestar, what inspired you to write a BowserXDaisy story? I never thought they would be a good couple.**

Alice: Honestly I've always liked both Bowser and Daisy as characters. Daisy's my favorite Nintendo character of all time and Bowser is just awesome altogether as well as hilarious! I've liked him since Mario RPG, legend of the seven stars! ^_^ Also as we all know, Bowser's madly in love with Peach, so I thought 'what if he was in love with Daisy?' O_O In most PeachXBowser story they seem almost too different to be compatible. Peach is soft, sweet and delicate and Bowser is rowdy, tough and has a bad attitude. XD Daisy seems far more compatible; Bowser seems like he needs someone to challenge him. And I think Daisy does that nicely. ;)

Ultrra: Here's the next one Ally.

**Do the other Mario characters (IE Mario, Luigi, Peach, Yoshi) know Bowser's in love with Daisy yet?**

Alice: Haha! Hmm, I don't want to give away the plotline but some of them are mildly suspicious to say the least. :)

**Will we meet all the koopalings in the story?**

Alice: We sure will! :) They all will be introduced individually so we can get to know their personalities. And we'll all see what they think of their dad's new found love interest! ;D

Ultrra: Lets…(laughs)…Go on to the next question…(laughs again)

Alice: (stares at Ultrra) Suuuuure….(whispers) Freak…

**Alicestar, what are your measurements?**

Alice: O_O (blushes)…WHAT! What the hell is THIS!

Ultrra: (hides laughter) XD

Alice: Uh… N-Next question please…

**Is it true, on December 24, 2011 you ate Santa's last cookie?**

Alice: NO! I WOULD NEVER STEAL FROM SANTA! O_O I love Santa Clause!

Ultrra: (Starts suffocating from laughter) XDD

Alice: (Scratches head)…Weird…Uh…next…question?

**When you thought no one was looking, did you ****_really _****kick the puppy in the park? The one with spots and pees in everyone's lawns?**

Alice:….No…What? Who…is responsible for this!

Ultrra: (Puts oxygen mask on) XDDDDDDDD

Alice: (Stares)…

Ultrra: (Still laughing) XD

Alice:…**YOU DID THIS!**

Ultrra: Took you long enough to figure it out. XP Ketchup small fry!

Alice:….(Slowly turns to audience) You guys better go ahead and read the story…Things will get violent here…

Ultrra: Alice…calm down…Alice? Holy—Where did you get a bowgun from! They're illegal!

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>The twin glow of my monitor and Firefly's flaming radiance were the only light sources in my room; it was the beginning of daybreak and the sun was still lethargically hidden. I was online chatting with my cousin, Peach. While the Mushroom Kingdom had the internet long before Sarasaland, I had been online long before Peach was allowed.<p>

The Mushroom kingdom was _completely_ overprotective of their princess and it wasn't until recently that Peach was finally allowed online. That is, she was _only_ allowed online under someone's supervision or if she was going online to speak with Mario, Luigi, Toad, Toadette, or myself.

This was our third online conversation and I could tell Peach was fascinated with instant messaging. I watched the letters _PrettyPeachyPetals_ _is writing_…pop up at the bottom of our chat screen. As I waited for my cousin—who seemed even more indecisive online—I happily sucked pungent pumpkin juice through a straw. I was perched on my stomach, feet in the air as I tapped my chin thoughtfully.

I laughed as Peach stopped typing _again. _This made a grand total of five times that she had stopped typing altogether, probably thinking over every little thing she was sending me. Stars I'm going to have gray hair before she ever sent a message.

PrettyPeachyPetals: _So you never did tell me about all the boys you danced with during your gorgeous Sumanni. ^_^_

TheSuperFlower: _i told u the best ones I danced with: Lulu, Ryu and Bowser. oh yeah and that one prince of Aqualands is such an ass!_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Bowser as one of the better ones…how odd and Daisy! Don't say such crude words!_

TheSuperFlower: _ah ha! I didn't say it! Just typed it couz! ;P_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _-_- You know what I mean…Don't be coy with me!_

TheSuperFlower: _okaaaay then, I promise I won't say that word anymore…around you. But seriously P, that guy was awful. I told you all that stuff he said right?_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Yes you did! He ought to be ashamed of himself! People like him make royalty look so bad! :/_

TheSuperFlower: _IKR? I was so tempted to smack him into the next century, drag him back then get him again!_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Laughing!_

TheSuperFlower: _lol peachy! u're supposed to say 'Lol' laughing out loud remember?_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Oh! Oh I'm sorry, I mean 'Lol'_

TheSuperFlower: _and remember P, u don't need to use perfect grammar, this is the internet._

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Yes I know but after all those grammar lessons Toadsworth made me go through, it seems like such a waste to type improperly…intentionally!_

TheSuperFlower: _u'll get used to it with enuff practice_

One new message popped up and I blinked. Apparently a new IM from a user named_ TheGreatKing_ has been sent to me. Hmm, now I wonder who this could be? I accepted and opened the instant message. I all but nearly snorted my juice through my nose.

TheGreatKing: _hey there hotstuff! ;D_

TheSuperFlower: _who is this!?_

TheGreatKing: _oh come on now I thought the screenname wud b a dead give away. he's tall, dark and handsome and…he can breathe fire like a god!_

TheSuperFlower: _BOWSER! IS THAT YOU! O_O_

TheGreatKing: _well how many other great kings do you know?_

TheSuperFlower: _good point Bowwy_

TheGreatKing: _I THOUGHT I told u never to call me that again! :/_

I laughed; his instant messaging icon was a miniature Bowser with large bubbly red eyes, chubby arms, legs and a round body. Whenever Bowser typed in a smiley, the animated icon would respond accordingly. Since he typed an angry face, the chibi Bowser was pouting; steam and smoke puffing from his nostrils as he tapped his foot impatiently.

_How cute!_ The Bowser icon got angry just like the real Bowser did! Peach's smileys were animated hearts as mine were prancing fireflowers.

TheSuperFlower: _lol! yup u're definitely Bowser…and btw your little icon is too cute! ^_^_

TheGreatKing: _heh y thank u! B)_

Yet again I laughed at the sight of his icon. The cute mini Bowser put on sunglasses and crossed his arms as he beamed brightly. I think sunlight even reflected from his shades. That was too cute!

TheSuperFlower: _haha mini Bowser is cool!_

TheGreatKing: _of course he is; if I use them then they must b awesome._

TheSuperFlower: _oh stars…lol_

TheGreatKing: _so…does knowing that u're talking to THE head studmuffin of all koopas make you weak in the knees? Does it make ya swoon? _

This time the mini Bowser was laying on its side winking coyly, blowing a myriad of red, flaming heart-shaped kisses. I'm glad I set my drink aside or I probably would have spat up all over the screen!

TheSuperFlower: _oh wow…there's something I never hoped to hear…not even ur cute smiley can take away the awkwardness there!_

TheGreatKing: _LMAO! so onto my next point, y weren't u answering my Sneaksheet rants?! I thought u were busy and yet here u are screwing around online!_

TheSuperFlower: _oh, cuz im trying to teach peach how to surf online and be safe_

TheGreatKing: _'be safe'? wow I didn't even know the internet was dangerous…except for all the dirty nude photos and spyware_

TheSuperFlower: _and THAT'S wat I'm keeping peachy keen away from_

TheGreatKing: hmmm, you know what? _I could have sworn i saw you on one of those sites…mushroom girls gone wild or something like that…_

TheSuperFlower: _LOL…ok that's it, im gonna delete your ass from my buddylist now._

TheGreatKing: _LMAO! ok! ok! Sheesh! can't a koopa kid around anymore! also, wat were you talking about a new days ago? something about rawk hawk?_

As I was about to respond to Bowser again, I had at least three messages from Peach. I laughed, imagining how frantic she was. I minimized his screen and looked at my chat with Peachy.

TheSuperFlower: _Peachy?_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Daisy? Oh thank goodness I thought something bad happened to you! ;_;_

TheSuperFlower: …_Peachy people CAN step away from the computer and also another thing, ur not obligated to sit here and chat forever… -_-_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Well yes but…I feel that it will be quite rude to just leave in the middle of a conversation… O_O_

TheSuperFlower: _trust me it's not, ya just type 'brb' and u can take as long as u want_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _Brb? What does that mean? O_O_

The minimized conversation screen was flashing and apparently I had several messages from Bowser. I laughed, knowing how impatient he was; between him and Peach, they were tag-teaming the hell out of me! If they didn't have such a turbulent relationship, I would suspect they were doing this on purpose!

TheSuperFlower: _hold on a sec! brb!_

PrettyPeachyPetals: _What? But what does that even mean! Hmm let me go to Mushroomgoogle and search it…_

TheSuperFlower: _Bowwy?_

TheGreatKing: _GEESH! finally! it took you forever! i thought i'd grow a beard by the time you got back. and how many times do I have to tell you about that stupid name!?_

I beamed again as I watched the mini Bowser icon throw a tantrum. The icon Bowser was angrily jumping up and down on his chubby legs, steam puffing out of his ears as he waved his chubby little arms. I couldn't help but laugh.

TheSuperFlower: _lol! ur such a drama king! That should be your screen name instead. Anyways there's this Rawk Hawk show and I'm kinda interested and wanting to see it…_

TheGreatKing: _get any letters from junior and wendy—? Oh yeah, u've told me about that_

TheSuperFlower:_ Jr and wendy have sent me the usual letters this week_

So I told Bowser about the wrestling match this Friday. It would be hosted in Glitzville and it would be a once in a lifetime opportunity. As Bowser was a difficult creature, I decided to stroke his ego by mentioning how utterly amazing and _manly_ he would be if we could go see my biggest wrestling idol.

TheGreatKing: a_ wrestling match in Glitzville eh? Well maybe as the King Koopa in these parts, I could arrange something_. _Pull a bit of strings and get us some kickass seats._

TheSuperFlower: _k, well I'm gonna start trying to mentor Peachy again. Ttyl?_

TheGreatKing: _Ooh talk to me later eh? u had better remember too or else I'll find u and getcha ;D_

TheSuperFlower: _toodles bowser!_

ThreGreatKing: _later flower. and tell Firefly daddy says hi_

After wrapping things up online with Peach, I said a quick farewell and signed off. That reminds me, I have mail to read. _Maiiiil tiiiiime!_

I padded over to my desk, grinning at the abundance of multiple letters. Oh yay, letters were so fun to write and read! Here's one from Peach; to sum it up, she stated how much fun she had at my _Sumanni_ and how she thought I looked very lovely that evening.

Although Peachy had admitted to being embarrassed of both her father's and Grammy's actions she still found their antics amusing all the same. She also was curious about Ryu, the mysterious royal I had chosen to dance with. I laughed as Peach's letter stated how completely dreamy he was.

And he is dreamy. And delicious. _Yum..._

Luigi's letter stated how much fun he had had at my _Sumanni_—common theme of the letters no?—and how he hadn't danced in years. At the time he wrote the letter, the Mario brothers were busy trying to stop up a leak that was flooding their house. _Well, I guess that explains why some of the edges of his letter are wet…_

Lulu also wished I would come visit him at their pad for a bit and bid farewell. Parry was his usual kind self, asking how many guys I had drooling after me since my make over and Koopie wrote a letter to say hello and also included a couple of discount coupons for her store.

I received a letter from the Ryu and I did everything in my power not to squeal out like a teenage girl. His letter spoke of how much he had enjoyed the _Sumanni_ and how pleased he was to have been invited to such a splendid event.

He was very interested in getting to know me better. He politely inquired my interests, hobbies and the like. Also everyone was curious about the comet that had touched down in Sarasaland, but even a week later we still had little information about the mysterious tablet.

Hmm.

With a large grin I wrote back to all my penpals, trying to ignore my awful scrawl of handwriting. Once I finished writing them all, I placed the mail into our castle inventory and headed off. You would think after my _Summani _I would be free to relax a bit.

No, not me folks.

The days of the week flew by in a blur as I was busy overlooking commerce, building plans, and irrigation distributions. It seemed as if I was busier than ever, involved deeper in the politics of my kingdom. Another change I had noticed ever since my _Sumanni_ was how Father made more time in his schedule to spend with me.

Lately we seemed to spend a couple of hours together, even doing something as simple as playing a game of chess or enjoying afternoon tea with one another. During our time together Father would politely ask what I had done for the day and I would tell him. Although he wouldn't speak much, he would nod his head and give his usual succinct responses.

During one of our afternoon teas, Father spoke to me about an unusual event. I was in the middle of accepting a couple of crème pastry cakes and cinnamon tea from a maid when he spoke.

"Daughter, the council and I have some news we would like to share with you," his deep tenor was smooth as he sipped his tea.

"What would that be, Father?"

"The council and I have been receiving an insuperable sum of letters from suitors asking for your hand in marriage," Father's icy eyes studied me carefully as he spoke, "We are pleased so many kingdoms are interested in the hand of our fair princess."

My face burned with blush, "H-How many royals are interested in my hand?"

Father delicately sipped his tea, "We counted one hundred and fifty six interested men."

This caused me to choke on my tea and splutter gracelessly. Father didn't seem put off by my lack of etiquette, if anything he looked prepared for it. He calmly offered a napkin that I quickly made good use of. By the time the last of my coughs had died away, Father began to speak again, "We would like to know what you think of this."

I patted my sternum one final time just to make sure I had gotten out every single last cough before I spoke. I straightened up, "Well my lordship…"

Father closed his eyes as he softly blew at his tea. The almost unnoticeable furrow of his brows indicated his patience was being tried, "Please daughter, you know that once we are alone, you may refer to me as 'Father.'"

"Ah! Y-Yes Father. Well, I didn't even know I had that many…suitors," I blushed hard; one hundred and fifty six royals were interested in _me_!?

Go Daisy! Go Daisy! It's my birthday!

"Yes," just the smallest touch of a smile warmed his face, "The suitors have clearly noticed how splendidly you have blossomed into a beautiful young woman."

With Father's soft expression, I found myself suddenly feeling shy. I decided to study my teacup, "T-Thank you Father."

"I know you shall have your usual meeting with King Bowser at the end of this week, however we would like to alert you that as of next week you shall spend time with a few of your suitors."

I looked up, "But there's one hundred and fifty six of them! How can I spend all my time with all of them?"

Father shook his head, "We shall narrow the choice to six. The council and I shall elect three and you shall have the choice to select four more."

I frowned; who in the world would the council try to choose for me? They themselves didn't dance around with the princes. What if they try to stick me with some arrogant prince simply because he's rich?

"And on what basis will you and the council choose my potential husband on?" I tried not to speak through my teeth; that would be an all too obvious show of my anger.

Father looked amused, "That is not your concern princess, while you are present enough to see that my council and I have two different agendas, I shall invest in my daughter's happiness."

"Thank you Daddy," I spoke softly.

"You are welcome _Chisana_," his words matched my soft tone, "Now if I am not mistaken it is three pm and you are to be tutored in Public Relations. You may take your leave princess."

The days of the week blended into a long, homogeneous stretch until Friday. I packed and took my travel buddy Firefly and was ready to head off to have another adventure with Bowser. Lady Angora had yet again taken the liberty of packing my nicest clothes but this time I had an ace up my sleeve.

I had Kammy compile a separate wardrobe at the Bowser's Keep. That meant all my comfortable shorts, shirts and tank tops were stockpiled in the castle and awaiting me. All I had to do was pretend to wear Lady Angora's chosen clothing and then change in the Darklands.

Haha booya.

Once upon a time my carriage staff had been afraid of traveling into the Darklands but those times were long passed. While we were arriving near the ominous castle's gates, my staff waved to a couple of familiar faces on our way. The carriage pulled to a soft stop outside of the castle and I saw Kammy awaiting me. Yet again she was scrolling through her tablet.

"Heya Kammy!" I called out, walking over towards her.

Kammy stopped and instantly flew over, "Princess Daisy! We must hurry!"

"Huh?"

"Your event with the King will start soon. We must head to the Clown Car pronto!"

"Uh…okay, but what about my bags and Firefly?"

Kammy waved a dismissive hand, "Leave them; the servants will take care of them. His highness is waiting on you! And we must not keep him waiting! Now follow me please."

Kammy took the lead, darting in and out of hallways as I rushed after. With one last turn, we entered Bowser's courtyard where his clown car's launch pad awaited. I stepped into the courtyard and there Kamek chattered to Bowser.

"Don't worry your Nastiness, she'll be here soon," the Magikoopa spoke.

Bowser stood, arms crossed and smoke wafting from his mouth. He arched an eyebrow at the sound of our approach and grinned. The flight crew saluted us as I rushed to get to Bowser. I was grinning so large my cheeks were starting to hurt, "Hey you!"

"Hey yourself," even though his tone was gruff, his carmine eyes were bright with mirth, "Now come on, we're going to go catch that wrestling match."

I gaped dumbly as he grin twisted wickedly.

"Y-You mean we're going to see _the_ Rawk Hawk?! Rawk _friggin' _Hawk!?" I didn't squeal; my voice trilled and no, of course I didn't jump around like a schoolgirl.

Chuckling, Bowser raised an eyebrow, "Wow you like him _that_ much eh?"

"He's awesome!" I waved my hands in the air stupidly, "His suplexes are amazing!"

"That they are!" Kamek beamed, "And when he flexes, it's amazing! His biceps look like the Eifel tower!"

"Shut up you!" Kammy snarled at him, "His lordship did not ask _your_ opinion! And besides his majesty's biceps are twelve times more impressive than any 'Rawk Hawk'! _Pah_!"

"Hmm," Bowser scratched his chin, "Well you can drool over him later. Right now we've got to get going. Glitzville is sort of out of the way so we'll have to make haste to be there in an hour."

Just as I tried to climb into the clown car, Bowser gripped my shoulder, "Before you attempt to fail climbing into the clown car…I have a couple of…_things _I want to introduce you to."

"Like what?"

Before he could reply, two people popped right out of the clown car yelling surprise, smiling largely with insane grins. Remember how I said I don't handle surprises very well?

Well...

"_AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH_!"

I fell off, shrieking madly, and barely registered when Bowser caught me.

Things only got worse when hands tried to restrain me. It sent me into all-out attack mode as I was kicking, squirming, screaming. I crunched a stray fist into something or someone that grunted and I managed to kick a dent into the clown car.

"IT'S AN AMBUSH!" I shrieked, sending a wild karate chop at an approaching Koopa troopa.

"Stars in Star Haven she dented the Clown Car!"

"Not just that! But she punched the king in the nose!"

"That was quite the shot! He looked like he flinched!"

"What's wrong with her?"

"Mama Daisy hates being surprised." Sounded like Junior.

"Princess Daisy!" Kamek cried, "Please calm down! It's all right! Everything's okay!"

"Princess! Calm down!" Kammy cried out, "It's just the princes! And Lord Bowser is holding you."

"Mama Daisy," Bowser Junior pouted, "Calm down!"

I stopped my attacking frenzy as my sense slowly returned. My heart was beating wildly, eyes darting around and a tuft of bangs drooped in my left eye. I blushed darkly when I realized how everyone was gawking at me. Even the two Koopas in the clown car were staring, jaws dropped.

I could feel someone very warm and very big holding onto me; that's right Bowser was holding me. And with a suddenness I realized Bowser had an arm wrapped around my middle and the other was nestled right onto my chest.

He shall live because it was an innocent mistake.

"Bowser," I said in a low voice, speaking so only he could hear me.

"Flower? Stars you got me good in the nose."

"Oh sorry!" I squeaked.

"That actually kind of hurt," he sounded amused, chuckling even, "Remind me never to get on your bad side."

"Yeah…Sorry, but I was surprised and I can't do surprises…"

"So I've learned. So we're all good now?"

"Well actually…You're touching my torso."

"Torso?" Bowser arched a brow.

I flushed; this guy is _dense_, "Bowser…what do girls have on their chests? You're touching _them_."

I could tell the moment it added up in his brain because his hands disappeared from my person quickly. I turned to look at him and saw his cheeks were a bright shade of red. If I wasn't so mortified from my own freak out, I would have laughed.

"—never washing these _blessed _hands _again_," he whispered reverently.

What was he talking about?

"King Daddio, I think I see some blood dripping from your nose," one of the Koopalings from the clown car declared smugly.

Both Koopalings had wild, brightly-colored manes and insane, matching grins that nearly stretched across the expanse of their faces. They also looked similar to one another, from the same stringy build, to the same smiles and even their eye colors were nearly identical. Were they twins?

"Blushing are we _hmmmmm_?" One of the Koopalings wiggled his eyebrows with a silly grin.

"Dirty, dirty thoughts there, eh King Daddio?" The other made the exact same silly face.

And with each passing remark their expressions only grew more ridiculous, "Eh King Daddio?"

"I said, eh King Daddio?"

"Daddio?"

"Daddy! _Ohhhhhh_ Daddy~!"

The twosome roared with laughter as Bowser suddenly snapped around to glare at them. His face was an even darker shade of red as he growled at them, "_YOU TWO LITTLE BASTARDS SHUT UP!_"

Kammy appeared, coughing into her palm. I realized she was hiding her laughter, "Princess Daisy, these are Lord Bowser's sons, Prince Lemmy and Prince Larry. More fondly known as the twins."

"Wonder twin power...ACTIVATE!" They cried dramatically, slamming their fists together.

I laughed softly; these guys were _nuts! _And little did Bowser realize it, but I'm positive his anger only made their antics more and more crazy.

"I hope you do not mind the extra company," Kamek smiled, "The princes will be on their very best behavior. They came from school to spend the weekend in your company."

"I don't mind," I laughed, "So long as they don't try to startle me again."

I really wasn't surprised when Bowser swept Junior and I into his arms before he leapt into the clown car. The flight crew saluted and the clown car was revved up and put into motion. As we flew through the air, I sighed happily; I was finally getting to meet Rawk Hawk! He's been an idol of mine—much to my father's horror—since I was nine!

I turned to look at the two twins who were grinning at me wickedly; now why did I get the vibe that these two were utter and complete trouble? Junior sat in my lap as Bowser was at the helm, piloting.

"So Princess Daisy," Lemmy? Or was it Larry who started speaking, "We heard you are friends with our dad?"

"Yes, I suppose I am," I arched an eyebrow, "Is that okay with you two?"

"We're figuring that out right now," the other twin answered, his eyes sparkling impishly.

"Wait, so who's who?" I mused.

"Well I'm the luxurious prince Lemmy," I noticed he had greener eyes, "I'm a Gemini, I like long scrolls on the beach, and I'm currently single."

"And I'm the lovable Larry," his eyes were bluer, "I'm also a Gemini, I love children and puppies, and I'm a secret romantic at heart."

I laughed; these kids are ridiculous!

"And I'm Bowser Junior!" The Koopaling in my lap piped up proudly, tail wagging.

I hugged him as he purred, "Yes you are sweetie!"

"So now," Larry spoke, blue eyes narrow, "We have to give you a test."

"A test?" I asked, grinning.

"Should we really give her the test Lar?" Lemmy asked with faux suspicion, "I mean it is _the _test."

"I think we should Lem," Larry replied, "It's the only way we'll know if she's cool or not. We have to learn: is she a chump? Or a champ?"

"Okay," Lemmy spoke, "Question number one do you—"

"Ask her anything _stupid_ and I'll come back there and rearrange your faces," Bowser growled, cutting a dark look at the twins.

"King Daddio," Larry began, sounding all too academic, "What ah, constitutes 'stupid' in your definition? Because if you ask me, stupid, or stupidity in itself is very subjective to an individual who—"

Bowser growled loudly, cracking his knuckles ominously in a promise of future pain. The twins' mouths snapped shut so fast that I burst out laughing; I guess they knew the limits of their father's patience. While I laughed, Bowser shook his head, grumbling something disparaging about his sons.

"I wonder if Clawdia drank when she was preggers with these two," Bowser huffed under his breath, "It had to be _something..."_

"Okay back to question one," Lemmy said, "What is your favorite pastime?"

"I like go-karting and soccer," I tapped my chin thoughtfully, "But if I had to choose, soccer is my favorite past time."

"Good way to keep those abs, legs and gluts toned, eh?" Larry chuckled.

Lemmy, 'whispered', "Not that she needs any help 'cause _Stars almighty _she's—"

Bowser cracked his knuckles and that must have been their signal to change topics, "So what do…princesses do all day?"

"I wake up around six thirty every morning," I laughed at the disgruntled groans, "Have breakfast, then my personal tutor will teach foreign policy and diplomacy until noon, I'll have lunch, play a round of tennis, then tutoring in civil procedure, afternoon tea, etiquette lessons, Sarasaland council meetings, dinner, soccer practice, sleep then rinse and repeat."

"Wow you actually do stuff," Lemmy appeared impressed, "And here I thought princess just eat, sleep, lounge around and get manicures all day."

I chuckled, "If she's smart a princess will learn how to run her kingdom so one day she can be in control. I plan on running Sarasaland when my father retires."

"Interesting," Larry narrowed his eyes, "If you were kidnapped, would you rather it be by an allergenic dragon or a hippopotamus with diarrhea?"

I snorted out loud, "Umm…I think I'd take the dragon."

"Cherry or pineapple?"

"Uh…cherry. Pineapple can be hit or miss with me."

"Would you rather be able to fly or have super strength?"

"Nothing can beat flying. I'd fly."

"Boxers of briefs?"

I laughed again, "I can't explain why but boxers."

"Ho! Well chalk that up as another one for the scoreboard. That's all King Daddio—"

"Strike _two_," Bowser snarled; their interactions nearly had me in tears.

"Donkey Kong or King Daddio?"

Out of my peripherals, I saw Bowser stiffen. Oh Stars, what did a dumb question like this matter to him?! I tried to hide my laugh, "Um, I'd have to go with 'King Daddio.' DK's strong, but over Bowser? No way!"

Lemmy grinned impishly, "Who said anything about strength? I meant as a _lover._"

Before I could reply to that, Junior popped up, pointing to the sight below, "Look! It's the coliseum! We're almost there!"

I stood up, picking up Junior so we both could look at the city below. It was Glitzville at night, it's prime; thousands of sparkling lights shone in a myriad of rainbow colors, glittering advertisements and celebrity faces light up the billboards. It was beautiful in an artificial kind of way.

Lemmy and Larry were also pointing out brightly-colored buildings and giggling at some of the racy, scantily-clad ads. Their immature giggles received a smack in the back of the head from dad. Hmm, I'd have to make sure Junior didn't see anything too mature. But this was Glitzville; life in the fast lane with bright lights, loud scenery and beautiful—if not scantily clad—women.

I grinned; I could finally meet Rawk Hawk…

"Don't tell me you're thinking of that _Rawk Hawk_ guy," Bowser's voice had a rumbling growl.

"Hmm?" Blinking I looked up and over towards him.

Although Bowser was staring ahead and dutifully guiding the clown car, his brows were furrowed more than usual and he even had a sneer on his face.

"Whoa! Why the heated look?" I laughed, stepping over towards him.

"Oh no reason," he huffed, "'Cept you're drooling over some _loser_ like a groupie."

"Am not!"

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Whatever Flower, make sure you wipe the drool off your face before we go into the arena."

"_Oh brother_," I rolled my eyes.

The clown car hauled some serious ass; for a trip that should have taken an hour and a half, we had arrived within forty-five minutes tops. The famed Glitzville coliseum was huge, even from our view in the sky it loomed. We landed in the VIP section where people were dressed in expensive clothing and women wore glittering thigh-length dresses and layers of makeup.

As Bowser turned to talk to a valet, I had to wonder: was I under-dressed here? While I was admiring one lady's shimmering gold sequence dress, she turned to look at me blankly. I smiled, mouthing, 'Your dress is pretty,' and she sneered before turning her head in the other direction. I raised an eyebrow.

_Well excuse me; maybe I ought to have told her I thought the circus came early since her dress was so damn tacky!_

"What's her problem?" I huffed, eyeing the terrible pineapple blonde-dye job of hers.

"Don't worry about her," Lemmy said loudly, speaking causally as if he was talking about the weather, "She's probably really ugly under all those layers of makeup."

"Or she's a guy," Larry chimed in as the woman in the glittering dress turned to sneer at us, "Oh look! Everyone wave and say hi!"

The twins smiled at her as if she was a long-time friend and waved. The look of abject shock on goldie's face had me laughing hard, snorting even as I doubled-over. Red-faced, she pooched her cherry-red lips before spinning around and stomping off.

Lemmy and Larry grinned up at me, "That'll teach her to mistreat our Mamacita."

"Seriously," Lemmy hummed, "I could probably see that bright-ass dress all the way from the moon."

"Oh so I'm 'Mamacita'? Like Mama Daisy?" I grinned.

"Yep," Larry nodded his head, "You're one of us now, like it or not."

"We've adopted you," Lemmy spoke in a faux serious voice, "And you cannot escape _ever_!"

Grinning, I wrapped my arms around them in a hug. Now that I think about it, every woman here wore a skimpy dress and towering heels. I trailed the line of glittering dresses to where everyone was squeezing into a long line. Ugh, is that where we would have to go?

A paratroopa approached.

"King Bowser," he bowed instantly, "Rawk Hawk is honored a celebrity of your status has come to watch his fight. Please follow us to your suite. On the way feel free to notify us of any refreshments you would like."

I looked up at Bowser and grinned, "Ooh! You mean we don't have to go through the crowd?"

"Nope," he grinned largely, "Since you're with the biggest stud in the Darklands, you get to be treated like a queen," he arched an eyebrow and smirked, "_My_ queen."

I gaped at him and Bowser took the opportunity to wrap his arm within mine, "Now come on! We've got to get to our premo seats and get some grub to snack on."

I feel bad saying this, but it was just awesome to walk right passed the waiting line and straight into the building. Heads craned in our direction as people whispered, wondering what kind of celebrity got to cut the line. We walked past a group of women, all dressed in provocative dresses who uttered nasty things about me.

'—he has to be rich if they get to cut the line like that.'

'How did a dumpy woman like her land a rich guy!'

'Better question is, how much is he paying her to sleep with him?'

I growled, clenching Bowser's arm a bit tighter; if I wasn't a princess, I'd go back there and show them just how 'dumpy' I am. I bet they'd love to meet my fists. Bowser turned to look at me and grinned, "Ignore them, they're just jealous."

We walked through the fighting arena which was gorgeous! The halls were made of cobblestone, and filled with gigantic stone statues of famous fighters, wrestlers, and warriors. I cooed happily at the stone statues of gladiators and heroes who had lived thousands of years ago. I walked towards the most current heroes and smiled at the sight of Rawk Hawk's valiant stone statue.

Then there was the stone statue of the mysterious Gonzales who…looked very familiar somehow. I was surprised to see a vicious-looking statue of Bowser. I turned to look at him as he grinned, "Find anything interesting?"

"_Y-You_!" I pointed; yes pointing _is_ rude but he had a statue in the Glitzville coliseum's hall of heroes! Wow, "You're in this hall! Why didn't you tell me?! This is _awesome!_"

Bowser shook his head, grinning, "I hope you're starting to believe me when I say how damn awesome I am."

"King Dad is a hero in this place!" chirruped Junior happily, "His statue is so cool!"

"It is isn't it?" I chuckled at his enthusiasm.

"Yeah, King Daddio does look pretty tough eh?" Lemmy agreed, looking up at the statue of his father.

"His statue is really buff," Larry whispered to me, "Makes ya wonder if it's embellished a bit?"

"Definitely should add a bit of a gut to make it realistic," Larry chortled.

I laughed, "You guys behave! Your dad does not have a gut."

"Add some more bags under his eyes…" Lemmy added.

"And some flab to his arms…" Larry grinned.

I laughed as Bowser suddenly appeared behind the twins. He lifted them both effortlessly by the cusp of their shells. They both kicked and wiggled helplessly as Bowser grinned hellishly at them, "Still thinking those muscles are 'embellished' you knuckleheads?"

"N-No not at all Your Buffness," Larry laughed.

"He's absolutely right, Your Rippedness," Lemmy added.

"Your Barrel-chestedness."

"Your Muscleheadedness."

"You Steroidness."

"Alright enough," Bowser growled before he dropped the twins none too gently on their rears.

"I've always wanted to be in this hall," I whispered.

That dream was a long shot, but I had always wanted to end up in the hall of heroes. A place where the greatest of the greatest heroes were honored; but what place did a princess have here? I think even DK had a statue here somewhere…

We walked through the hallways until we reached the suite. A servant bowed before opening the door, "Lord and Lady, your suite awaits you."

I gasped, smile growing as I looked down the ring. The view was marvelous! We had an eagle's eye view over the ring and the crowd down below as well. There were plush seats and even a large screen for us to look at. A call button was implanted in each chair, and I grinned even larger; this was amazing!

Bowser grinned and helped me into my seat. I looked up at him and frowned, "The chair was there already! I didn't need your help to sit down."

"Maybe not," he shrugged, smiling boyishly, "But I just _like_ doing things for you."

Oh gosh, I'm turning red again. As I tried to ignore the way Bowser grinned crookedly at me, a Koopa appeared before us with a smile. Now that I think about it, where are the kids at? I was hoping to introduce Junior to the awesome that was 'the Hawk.'

"My lordship and my lady," he bowed, "What may I get for you? Some snacks and refreshments perhaps?"

"That sounds wonderful," I beamed, "Would you happen to have…um popcorn and lemonade?"

"Yes of course," then the Koopa looked at Bowser, "And your lordship?"

"Hmm," Bowser scratched his chin, "Get me twelve popcorns, ten candied apples, seven lemon pops, and three crazy cherry slushes in large. Oh and get the kids in the second suite whatever they want, but Stars you will regret it if you get those twins too much sugar."

"Yes…I will keep that in mind," the servant looked a bit worried at that. He bowed and hurried off to retrieve our orders.

"So where are the kids?"

"In another suite," Bowser rolled his eyes, "I'm not gonna deal with the twins cracking jokes every ten seconds. I want _you _to enjoy this."

I smiled, "And I will!"

I rose from my seat and walked over to the viewing window. I all but pressed my face against the fiberglass as I looked over everything below me. This was amazing; it was something I had dreamed about doing as a girl. The crowd below was moving in a dark mass, everyone trying to find their seats.

The vendors were traveling through the crowd with their voices chanting, trying to sell their yummy products. Then the ring itself was huge! It was nearly fluorescent with the amount of lights upon it. I could see all the lights reflecting off the glittering dresses of ladies and flamboyantly dressed gents.

I hardly even noticed when Bowser rose to stand beside me, "What's going on in that cute lil' head of yours Flower?"

"This is all so cool!" I breathed happily, "I can't believe I'm here right now doing this! This is a dream come true!"

I spun around and glomped onto Bowser, "Thank you! Thank you for making this real for me!"

"Uh…yeah, yeah n-no problem Flower," I felt him pat my back awkwardly.

The lights around the arena dimmed and the crowd began to scream. Along with their cries, I heard myself shriek in exhilaration. Bowser all but forced me back into my seat as the loud stereo boomed to life and the music began to play. The Koopa servants returned with our snacks and soon I was stuffing my face with buttery popcorn.

"Here, try this."

Bowser offered me a bite of his caramel apple. He waved the delicious apple before my face and I took a small bite. Bowser chuckled at the caramel smear I got on my face. He ran a large finger across my cheek and happily licked his finger clean. I scowled at him, "Hey, who said you could touch my face Bowwy?"

Chuckling, the King Koopa arched a roguish eyebrow, "Oh really? Just be happy that I didn't lick the caramel off instead."

"Bowser!" I gasped, horrified he'd even think of doing something like that. Bowser simply laughed at my expression.

"Oh keep your skirt on Flower," then his smile became devious, "But I wouldn't _mind_ if you didn't…"

I laughed and elbowed him in the side, "You are _such_ a flirt."

Bowser grinned, "Yeah? But is it working?"

Groaning, I slapped a hand to my face as Bowser's chuckles rumbled loudly; stupid, big turtle. The mic suddenly came to life, "_Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the Glitzville Pit! Are you all ready to rock!"_

Along with the crowd I roared.

_"I said are you all…READY TO ROCK!"_

An even louder bellow of cheers and roars rose from the crowd. I laughed when I saw Bowser shaking his head at my enthusiasm.

_"For tonight's event, in this corner we have the challenger, we have the Super Bullet Bill!"_

All the lights to the area darkened as an arrangement of blaring rock music boomed, flooding the arena. The lights exploded into a rainbow of color as Super Bullet Bill came soaring through the sky. As the crowd cheered the bullet bill rolled effortlessly into loop after loop.

_"And now ladies and gentlemen, in the other corner we have the champ of Glitzville himself, Raaaaaawk Haaaaawk!"_

I ran over to the window, threw my hands up and roared savagely along with the crowd. The sound of the crowd's cheers were deafening as the tall, golden figure of Rawk Hawk strolled onto the walkway. I screamed louder as the spotlight fell upon my hero. He had the 'hawk strut' as he arrogantly carried himself into the ring, feeding off the crowd's energy.

_Oh my Stars it was really him! It was him!_

"Oh my Stars!" I cried, palms slapped to my face, "It's RAWK HAWK! I can't...I can't believe it...It's Rawk Hawk! _YEAAAAAAAAAAAH_!"

The second he smoothly slipped under the ropes and entered the ring, the crowd settled. With his signature 'cocky-hawky' smirk, he bounced on his toes, awaiting action. I went back to my seat smiling stupidly; I had just saw Rawk Hawk in person! It was so wonderful! So mind-blowingly cool! Bowser was frowning, eyes narrowed at something or someone in the ring.

"Bowser! _That was awesome_!" I screamed, adrenaline still pulsing through my veins like fire, "Rawk Hawk just walked down the walkway! H-He just walked down the walk…the walk way… _I was_ _rawked_!"

"Yeah it was okay…I guess," he rolled his eyes, "I can't see how you can like a guy who's so _puny_."

"Like?" I was offended, "I _love Rawk Hawk_!"

Bowser all but choked on his cherry slush, "_What!_"

He turned to look at the ring and growled. The match was awesome! The two competitors slowly circled each other, looking for any signs of weakness and instantly went head to head! I watched as Rawk Hawk and Super Bullet Bill fought and wrestled each other, pulling out the most savage suplexes, submission holds and grapples. While Rawk Hawk threw punches at Bullet Bill, I mimicked him, hoping my punches would make his stronger.

They bounced off of the ropes and performed their awesome signature moves which made the crowd shriek with joy. Whenever Super Bullet Bill landed a hit upon Rawk Hawk, the entire crowd unanimously booed as he flexed and posed.

I all but screamed when Rawk Hawk perform his ultimate signature move, the Rawkin' Suplex! Oh my Stars! He picked up Super Bullet Bill like he weighed nothing and slammed him to the floor with a loud thud! So amazing! Super Bullet Bill was out cold and Rawk hawk pinned him by crossing his arms and placing one foot upon his opponent.

The crowd went crazy at the sight of his arrogant pin. We all counted with the referee, "ONE! TWO! THREE!"

_"Ladies and gentlemen! The winner! Raaaaawk Haaaaawk!"_

As Rawk threw his hands in the sky victoriously, the crowd went crazy. I cheered happily, arms waving in the air as Rawk continued his victory celebration. I danced around happily, whooping and cheering as his victory music blared throughout the arena.

A Koopa servant entered the suite, "Would his lord and ladyship like to meet Rawk Hawk in his private chambers?"

My eyes grew wide; I could meet Rawk Hawk in person?! I could meet _the _Rawk Hawk!? Simultaneously Bowser and I replied.

"YES!"

"NO."

The Koopa servant glanced between us, looking conflicted, "…Erm…"

"If you don't want to meet him, then you can stay here. This is a once in a lifetime chance!" I told Bowser. I spun to face the Koopa servant, "Would you lead the way please?"

"O-Of course your ladyship, as long as this pleases Lord Bowser..?" the Koopa checked as he glanced at Bowser.

I turned to look at Bowser and was nearly floored. Wow, Bowser looked heated; arms crossed and eyes squinted to where they didn't look open, "You've got _exactly_ five minutes and you better be back by then or I'm coming for heads."

The Koopa servant gulped, "Y-Y-Yes your m-m-majesty. Come along Miss Daisy, we must go."

I followed the servant backstage where he was taking me to see Rawk Hawk. I was going to see the Rawk Hawk! I fussed with my hair, trying to fix it up a bit and straightened out my clothes. I wore a lavender tank top with a matching lavender lace skirt and dark purple leggings for modesty.

With Lady Angora's sudden dedication to overseeing my dress choice for my trips with King Bowser, this was the only semi causal thing I could sneak into the suitcase under her hawk-like watch. We walked to a door that had a golden star inscribed with 'Rawk Hawk'.

I was going to meet my idol! I was going to meet Rawk _friggin'_ Hawk! Oh be still my beating heart! I don't know if a weary soul like me can take such excruciating circumstances!

Haha! Yeah right, I'm excited but not _that_ dramatic.

I fixed the crown upon my head a bit straighter then wrapped on the door. A deep voice answered and I had to all but bite my tongue so that I didn't squeal like a girl. I opened the door and stepped in. There seated in a plush hair was Rawk Hawk! He was combing his fingers through his locks, smirking at his reflection.

His golden eyes shifted and through the mirror I saw him look at me. He spun around in his chair, smirking, "Well is this a fan of mine who's come to see the great Rawk Hawk? Please c'mon in and make yourself comfortable dollface!"

Blushing from his praise, I stepped in and softly closed the door behind myself. I took the nearest seat next to him and beamed. I couldn't contain my happiness any longer and I exploded, "Rawk Hawk! I just wanted to let you know that I think you're awesome! And I know that someday you'll find that Gonzalez guy and kick his ass!"

"Heh naturally," Rawk Hawk did his signature hair flip, "I have challenged Gonzalez time after time, yet he still refuses to show his cowardly face for a rematch! Heh, even he knows that he is no match for the godly Rawk Hawk!"

"You'll get him this time, I know it!" I chirruped.

"So what's your name?" He asked, popping out of his chair.

"Please call me Daisy."

"Allrighty then Daisy," he returned with a bottle of fire wine and two sparkling glass goblets, "Would you like some fire wine? It's especially delicious when made in Glitzville."

"Sure."

He filled my goblet halfway with the sparkling, bubbling lava-red fluid. He raised his glass and arched a dashing eyebrow, "How about a toast? To my victory and to you for being so darn cute!"

Blushing, I giggled and we clanked our glasses together. I blinked, surprised when he entwined his arm in mine and sipped from his wineglass. As we drank, his golden eyes were locked on mine, while I felt slightly awkward during the whole thing. I only smiled politely at him.

"Ah, that is simply delicious isn't it?" He purred.

"Um yeah it was very good," I stretched my smile, hoping to be convincing.

"Why Miss Daisy, you don't mind if I change into something more…comfortable do ya?" he asked.

"Um no, not at all."

"Awesome, you by the way are one bodacious babe," he pointed at me then slipped behind a changing curtain.

Even though he was behind the curtain, I could more than easily see his silhouette as he began to remove his clothing. Blushing, I decided to look everywhere but where he was. His room was filled with hundreds of plaques, trophies and pictures of Rawk Hawk posing with celebrities.

Soft, smooth jazz music began to pour into the room and even the lights dimmed. I snapped out of my trance and looked up. Rawk Hawk stood in a silken black robe, one hand holding his wineglass and the other snapping in tune to the indulgent music.

"I hope you don't mind if I put some sweet tunes on babe," he was smirking as he approached his seat, "it helps the Rawk unwind after a day's work."

The Rawk?

"Yeah sure that's fine."

Rawk Hawk hopped into his chair and spun around smoothly to face me. He sifted his wineglass around as he continued to smirk at me, "So Daisy, tell me a little about yourself."

As he looked at me, I couldn't help but notice that the front of his robe was left open, revealing a large amount of his muscled chest. Even the sleeves of his robe were rolled up to reveal his buff arms. He was muscular, but even the smallest tendon Bowser has is superior to Rawk Hawk's biggest muscle.

Hmm…

"Uh…well, I'm…I live in Sarasaland."

Intuition was telling me that somehow, I did not want this guy knowing I was the Sarasalandian princess. As he continued to stare at me with his molten golden eyes, he delicately sipped at his wine, "Like the Desert?"

"Yes."

"Shaa?"

"'Shaa?'" I blinked.

"It's the awesome way to say yes," Rawk chuckled, "So the Desert, hmm well that explains your bodacious honey-kissed tan. So what else is there to know about ya babe?"

"I love playing sports; soccer, tennis, and dodge ball are my favorites though."

"Tight, well then that explains your heh-excuse the pun but don't excuse the pun—rawkin' bod."

He raised a precarious eyebrow as his golden eyes scrolled over my frame. Suddenly self-conscious, I crossed my arms over my chest. I was wearing a tank top, a skirt and leggings; just how much of my 'bod' could he see like this!

"Uh, well thanks?"

"Shaa don't mention it blue eyes," he winked in a way that was supposed to be charming, "So does a hunny like you have a man?"

" 'Hunny?'" Okay the more I spoke to him, the more confused I became.

"Shaa, like you know a babe, a hottie, a betty, a smokin' chick," he beamed, showing off his pearly whites, "So blue eyes, are you seeing anyone?"

"Uh…no…"

"Well! How tubular my little Desert hottie! Well once you go Hawk, you'll never ever know another guy who can RAWK!"

I stared at him incredulously as he guffawed at his own joke; this guy has to be an imposter, he can't be Rawk Hawk! He's an idiot! An absolute buffoon! Look! He was even laughing so hard at his lame joke that he was snorting! Grimacing I moved away from him; yuck.

Rawk Hawk seemed to detect my movement because suddenly all laughter stopped and he popped up. He raised a mischievous eyebrow. With another hairflip, though this one I thought was almost girly, the champ smiled evilly at me, "Hmm? What's this? Where are you going my little Desert chiffon?"

"I think I want to leave now," I said softly.

"Not so fast hunny bunny," he smirked darkly, "you've got to kiss me goodbye first."

For one second we were staring at each other then the next I ran, taking off towards the door. I reached the doorknob and began trying to tug that sucker open. I screamed in dismay when I found that it was locked. I heard chuckling and turned to face the source of the amused laughter.

Rawk Hawk beamed at me impishly, arms crossed haughtily, "I believe you're looking for this…?"

He held up a small golden key. I frowned at him and clenched my fists, "Gimme that! I want to leave _now_!"

"Well then why don't ya come here and get it, Desert buttercup?"

I gasped as he dropped the key inside of his silken robes. As my face flushed red he chuckled suavely; my Stars he just dropped the key down his robes! And now he wants me to get that key? Rawk went to the boom box and turned the radio to even more amorous music. I was just stunned by how obtuse and crass this guy was! I can't believe once upon a time I idolized this guy! He started humming to the tune, winking at me.

"Y-You stay away from me!" I hissed pointing a threatening finger at him.

"What? All I heard was, 'Come get me you studly hawk you!'" with a chuckle Rawk Hawk began to meander towards me, "Raaaawr!"

Frowning, I raced around a table to put some distance between us. Rawk Hawk tried to rush me, but I simply moved in the opposite direction. He tried again and I repeated my pattern. Once he realized he wasn't going to get me he grinned, "Ah! I know this game! Think you can keep toying with the Rawk hmm?"

"Toying! I'm not playing anything with you!" I growled.

"Ah, ah, ah!" he shook his index finger at me, grinning, "The harder you play to get, the more I simply want you!"

With that he dove over the table and I screeched, wobbling before I fell over onto my backside. Rawk Hawk soared clear above my head and smashed into a wall, "Like ouch!"

I was too stunned to say anything, so I simply turned to gawk at him in stupor. Rawk Hawk shook his head to clear the cobwebs then narrowed his eyes predatorily as he saw me trying to make a get away. As I backed away, he slowly approached, grinning like sin. I glared up at his smirking visage.

"Hohoho! What shall you like do now my little spicy mama muffin?" he purred, "Come into my arms willingly? You know that you are far too dainty and feminine to challenge the Ra—_AIIIIE_!"

I watched as Rawk Hawk crumbled onto the floor clutching weakly at his 'family jewels'. I snorted; I may have been too 'dainty and feminine' to take on a professional wrestler like him but I certainly wasn't above kicking him where the sun doesn't shine.

The door to the room bust open, soaring off it's hinges and in popped King Bowser. He looked around furiously, head snapping to and fro then he seemed to take note of the atmosphere of the room. His smoldering fury morphed into confusion.

"What the..?"

He looked around in mild disgust as he listened to the soft love music and saw the soft, romantic purple lights. Bowser's mouth opened in silent horror at the sappy environment. He blinked before he found us. He saw me, perfectly unharmed then looked down at Rawk Hawk who was groaning on the floor.

Bowser looked stunned for a second before vestiges of anger showed up in his expression, "Flower are you okay?"

"Oh I'm perfectly fine!" I all but roared.

"This creep didn't try anything did he?" Bowser snarled, glaring at Rawk Hawk.

"Oh no i-it's him again!" Rawk Hawk wheezed as he tried to crawl away from Bowser, "N-Not k-k-k-king Bowser!"

"He learned his lesson," I replied simply, arms crossed.

Bowser snarled and stomped over to Rawk Hawk. He lifted him into the air with one arm, "Listen here Hawk, if you _ever _try to mess with my Flower again, the pain you're feeling now won't even compare to this!"

"Y-Yes K-K-King—" Bowser didn't even let him finish. With a snort he turned his head away and dropped Rawk Hawk, "…Idiot."

He stomped over to me, "Let's blow this joint Flower."

"Ugh yeah…"

I walked beside Bowser, still fuming at what just had happened. Ugh I can't believe Rawk Hawk was ever my idol! He's so stupid! So lame! And so ugh I don't even want to think about it! Once I get back to Sarasaland I'm going to destroy all my posters, magazines, drawings of Rawk Hawk! Everything!

"Hey, are you okay Flower?" Bowser asked, frowning a bit, "That uber goon didn't hurt you or anything did he?"

I laughed sourly, "No, no."

"Then why that look?"

"Ugh," I groaned, shaking my head, "It's just…Well…I can't believe I ever thought he was cool! He's such a…a…"

"A tool?" Bowser supplied helpfully.

I laughed hard, "Oh that's perfect! He's such a tool!"

"Heh," Bowser chuckled arching an eyebrow, "You'll have to give me the entire story. I only came in and saw the purple lights and…the sappy music."

So as we traveled back to the clown car where the other Koopalings were awaiting us, I had Bowser relive my weird night with 'the champ.' While Junior slept on my lap and the twins snored, leaning against each other, I told him about everything from the 'shaa-ing' to the 'getting dressed in something comfortable' moments.

By the time Bowser was steering the clown car, he was all but choking on his laughter, pounding his fists against the ship in a riot of laughter. Even though I was furious, I couldn't help but smile at the sound of Bowser's rancorous laughter.

"Oh that is too rich!" he laughed, wiping the tears from his eyes, "And better yet when I stomped in there, I found him on the floor and I was thinking, 'Oh my Stars she kicked his ass good!'"

"Well that was disappointing," I hissed, "I just found out an idol of mine was just…well a loser! I dunno if I want to even arm-wrestle anymore."

"Hey, just 'cause Rawk Hawk's a tool doesn't mean you should quit," Bowser shook his head, "You're one of the few humans who gave me a half-decent run for my money in arm-wrestling."

"What about Mario?" I asked.

"I'm convinced he's got some Koopa in his blood somewhere, have you ever_ seen_ the way he jumps? And his punches hurt! They _actually_ hurt!" I laughed at Bowser's statement.

Then I huffed, "You're only saying that to make me feel better."

"Nope," Bowser was smirking now, "I was honestly impressed with some of the high-level moves you knew. You could probably beat any human guy I know since you're knowledgeable."

I glared at him, "You creamed me! My amount of skill didn't matter!"

He chuckled, scratching the back of his head sheepishly, "I only used brute strength on you 'cause I wanted to impress you."

I frowned, "So by making me fume in defeat, you thought I'd be impressed? Bowser, I'm the kind of girl that when I lose to a guy, I don't swoon, I only plan on how and when to get him back."

Bowser made a thoughtful look before he grinned at me, "Say…how would you like to pilot this bad boy?"

I blinked and hiked a thumb at myself, "You want me to pilot the clown car?"

Grinning in a way that had his fangs poking out, Bowser simply nodded his head. As I stood, I lightly set Junior into my seat. He squirmed a bit but still remained sleeping. I stepped beside Bowser, close enough that he could reach out and touch me, "What do I do?"

"First off, get your pretty lil' rear behind the wheel," Bowser moved so that I could stand behind the yolk.

He chuckled, "Ya gotta put your hands on the yolk to steer, unless you've got psychic powers that I don't know about."

"Yeah and what if I do?" I chuckled playfully.

Bowser's smile grew sharper, "Then you'd probably be horrified at the thoughts that travel through my brain. Now here, take a hold like this."

The King Koopa gently repositioned my hands so that they were at the 'ten and two' position, just like driving a car. Bowser's hands were still enclosed over mine as he moved my hands beneath his, "There, all you've got to do is hold her steady like this. Nothing to it eh?"

Even after several minutes, I couldn't help but notice that Bowser's massive hands were still holding mine. I tried to concentrate on how well I was steering the clown car and not on how warm and startlingly soft Bowser's hands were.

I also tried to ignore how he let his hands linger upon my own for awhile. Bowser was close enough to me that I felt his chuckle reverberate through his chest. I looked up to see him arch a roguish grin at me. His eyes gleamed like sparkling rubies under the moon's touch, "You ready to fly on your own without daddy's guidance?"

I beamed up at him, "Sure. Let's have a go at it."

Bowser chuckled and with one final squeeze of my hands, he let go and I smiled. I was steering the infamous clown car! I am _such _a badass! I wish there were someone around to see my at the helm of the legendary clown car, driven by the most powerful Koopa of all time.

"I'm doing it! I'm doing it! I'm really flying this thing! Yahoo!"

It was exhilarating! I was really making this awesome vehicle go to my command! I was beaming hard enough that my cheeks were starting to bloom with pain. I looked up at Bowser who simply gave me a thumbs up and winked. I sighed softly as I enjoyed the warm wind traveling through my hair and how soft the moon's glow was within the sky.

I even enjoyed how Bowser hovered around me. As I continued to steer the ship he leaned over the edge of the clown car. Eyes closed as the wind traveled through his mane, I knew that he too was enjoying the night alongside of me.

I turned away to allow Bowser to enjoy the tranquility of the night in peace. With the wind running it's invisible tendrils through my hair, I sighed happily.

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><p>Alice: Hope you all enjoyed! Review please! ;)<p> 


	14. A mane of fire: The Firelands Council

Alice: Hey, hey everyone! The reviewers were so awesome! And the reviewers about Rawk Hawk had me laughing! X)

Ultrra: What! Ally, Rawk Hawk is awesome! His theme song from Paper Mario alone was awesome!

Alice: One reviewer is completely correct, I've heard you should never met you idol! They're never as cool as you perceive them to be!

Ultrra: I just remember when Bowser kicked Rawk's ass in the game! XD

Alice: He did? Oh yeah! Lol! I remember that! Ah good times…good times…Oh! Hey! So readers, I was logging on to and saw this new thing called 'image manager' what is it for?

Ultrra: (Shrugs) Dunno, uploading photos?

Alice: Hmm…Maybe one of my readers can help me out there! ^_^ Someone was kind enough to tell me the Koopaling order! You guys ROCK!

Ultrra: (Skimming chapter) Ooh and apparently there's some good stuff in his chapter! Looks like a few rough patches up ahead eh?

Alice: Yeah I know! I guess like the Summani this chapter will have two parts. I hate writing super-duper long chapters…

Ultrra: Well why not? If you get tired, why not just take a break and make a sandwich or something? Or bookmark the spot then come back?

Alice: Good idea…Also! One reviewer is right! That One Direction song is basically the description to the Bowser X Daisy relationship! :3 I also love that song!

Ultrra: (Sings) Everyone else in the room can see it, everyone else but you! (pretends to play the drum solo)

Alice: (Stares) O_O You like that song Ultrra!

Ultrra: Eh, it's okay, but it's just that a certain SOMEONE blares that song on repeat.

Alice: (Blank look)…Who?

Ultrra: (stares)…

Alice:…

Ultrra: (Stares harder)

Alice: Wow Ultrra, you might have to work on that staring problem you got. It's a bit unnerving you know?

Ultrra: (facepalm) Argh nevermind…

Alice: For this chapter, it's going to be an emotional roller coaster! Ups, downs, and everything in between…

Ultrra: And then you get off.

Alice: Lol! XD

Ultrra: Well let's get this thing started (fastens seat belt) So get ready for the ride! No hats on coasters Alice.

Alice: (Fastens roller coast seat belt and throws hat at worker dude) Be sure to read and review and enjoy! ^_^ I'll try to have the second half done…in a reasonable amount of time.

Worker dude: Hey! Where'd that hat come from!

Alice: Wait…I thought I told the readers they'll be on a rollercoaster, not us… O_O

Ultrra: Shoot, we gotta have some fun too!

Alice: HAHA! Okay! (Puts hands up) Read, review and enjoy! Weeee!

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>The obnoxious chirruping alarm sent me popping up and violently beating it into silence. I glared lethargically; <em>7:02 <em>in the fricking morning. With a childish pout, I snuggled into my feather-soft pillow before starting my day.

Today's itinerary involved breakfast with the _oh _so powerful King Bowser and visiting various Darklandian cities—I think Bowser called them burrows. I would receive a glimpse into the legislative work of the king; Sarasaland parliament has always been interested in the governing of the Darklandian kingdom.

I'm surprised we're _finally_ doing diplomatic work! I turned the TV on—did I mention it's a one hundred and two inch flat-screen—and it was programmed onto a local news station. I laughed at the female anchor's gaudy carnation-pink beehive up-do and the male' anchor's hideously bright suit.

"Rawr_! Rise and shine Koopas and Koopettes!"_ The male anchor growled, smiling in a rather devious manner, "_We've got a fiery show planned and speaking of flaming, today's weather is going to be nothing but heat in all five Darkland Burrows_."

"_That's right Hornwort_," the female anchor smirked roguishly as well; maybe the evil smirk/grin was a Koopa thing in general? "_Today we'll have ninety degree plus temperature in all of the burrows. Also, King Bowser will be making his rounds today in the following burrows; Firelands, Smokelands, Coallands_—"

Ugh, today was going to be hot just like home. I rummaged through my armoire and threw on the lightest clothing I could find: a white tank-top with a tiny blue D on the breast and matching powder blue shorts.

By the time Kammy stopped by, I was literally walking out the door. As usual she was all business; she was polite when she said her hellos but let me know we must be on our way. Maids and servants scuttled to and fro carrying out their duties as we went.

They acknowledged Kammy and I with a greeting and a swift bow. We traveled through the halls and took the elevator to the thirteenth story because apparently that's where Bowser's room was. Hmm, wasn't it an ill omen to live on the thirteenth floor?

We walked passed the tall, imposing statues of past Darklandian kings and reached his ostentatious brick-red doors. Kamek was already there, curiously scratching his head. Before I could ask, Kammy floated over to him.

"I thought you were _supposed_ to have his majesty up by now," Kammy hissed.

Translation: Dumbass, why isn't Bowser awake yet!?

"But Kamelia, Lord Bowser sounds so tired don't you think?" Kamek sighed, "Listen to the _sweet sounds_ of his slumber! I don't have the heart to wake the young king."

_Sweet _sounds of slumber? I arched a suspicious eyebrow at the old advisor because we must have a _seriously_ different understanding of the word 'sweet.' Terrifying would be a more fitting adjective; even from this side of the door, the loud snores rattled dust from the walls.

A more suitable comparison to slumbering cuteness was Peach. She cooed and giggled in her sleep but Bowser? _Cute?_ No way, he sounded like five bears. I feel sorry for the woman who has to sleep with _that_ on a nightly basis. The poor woman better get herself some serious grade-A ear muffs.

Kamek drew his scepter back to knock but then halted, appearing to rethink his action. He faced me, "Hmm. Perhaps you could awaken Master Bowser? It would be less trouble for us."

I blinked, "Huh?"

"I agree with Kamek your Ladyship," Kammy replied, "I would implore you to wake the king."

I frowned deeply;_ they_ wanted _me _to wake up a temperamental, fire-breathing turtle? And I'm ninety-five percent sure Bowser _hated _mornings.

Pass. I choose life.

"Why me?" I frowned, "I want to live, thank you very much! And something tells me waking him up will shorten my life."

"His kingship absolutely hates mornings and being awoken before oh…I'd say nine am," Kammy fixed her glasses.

See I knew it! How did I know he'd hate mornings? Because he's Bowser that's why. It makes sense that an eight and a half foot tall, fire-breathing turtle would be pissy first thing in the morning. And cranky, big turtles _probably _got violent.

"Since I know the king is rather…_fond_ of you," Kammy smirked as Kamek laughed suddenly; did I miss something? An inside joke, "He would not threaten to burn the hair clear off your head if you did the honors."

I laughed, "Wait, Bowser's threatened to roast you before?"

"Every morning actually," Kamek replied as if being threatened was as ordinary as the sky, "So will you save our souls Princess and do us this favor?"

"Well…" I hummed thoughtfully.

"Please princess…?" Kamek even pouted, his bottom lip trembling.

Laughing, I rolled my eyes, "Ugh fine! I was going to do it anyways. The puppy pout was just extra."

"It has yet to fail me!" Kamek grinned.

"Shameful…" Kammy muttered under her breath, "What kind of Koopa makes such a preposterous expression!?"

I knocked on the large red doors but my effort didn't interrupt the cacophony of snores. I tried again, wrapping my knuckles as hard as I could but again the end result was the same. I looked at both Kamek and Kammy and shrugged.

"Try yelling at him," as Kamek suggested the idea, Kammy gaped as if he were insane.

"We want to wake the king," Kammy hissed, "not the—"

"_HEY BOWSER_!" I hollered, cupping my hands over my mouth, "WAKE UP!"

A lack of response and I turned to peer at the Magikoopas. Bowser's snores were still shaking the room and we were at an impasse. I was a little put off my shouting didn't wake him.

Kamek's expression shifted mischievously, "Go into his lordship's chambers and shake him. He'll awaken at _that_."

"_Kamek Koopa_!" Kammy wheezed in disbelief, "Are you touched in the head!? That is probably the most asinine idea I've ever heard. She'll be roasted alive!"

"Now Kamelia, you and I both know that's not true," Kamek smirked confidentially, "In fact I bet the king would be elated if her highness tried to strangle him in his sleep. If she had her hands on him…"

Kammy frowned before turning to me, expression worried, "Miss Daisy, I don't know where this fool gets his wild ideas from but perhaps you could…?"

I waved a hand dismissively, "Oh you don't even have to ask! I've been looking for a way to pay Bowser back for all of the stuff he's done."

"Well if you insist..." Kammy still looked a bit unsure.

I placed my palms upon the door and went to give it a shove. Kamek aided with a wave of his wand and the door rolled open. I peered at the two Magikoopa one last time: Kamek grinned and gave a thumbs up as Kammy looked unusually worried. As I stepped into the room I heard loud thwacks and smacks.

Kamek's grunts of pain rose over the snores, "Ow! _Ow_! Stars above, what is the meaning of this you violent old hag!?"

"_Old?!"_ Kammy wheezed, "Well for your information you're old too you useless bag of magical bones! Don't you ever put the princess in such peril again!"

"What?" Kamek hissed right back, "You and I both know Lord Bowser would have charred us to the bone for disturbing his slumber! It's happened before nearly five times already! We're both too old for such treatment!"

I tuned out their squabbling and crept into the bedroom suite. It was nearly pitch-black with the dark curtains and blinds drawn shut. As my eyes adjusted to the dark room, I could see the silhouette of the snoring king huddled under a heap of blankets.

His bed was massive with a towering headboard and a bed frame spanning several meters long. I walked to the large window and ripped the thick curtains back. The cool glow of predawn sunlight poured into the room in frosty streams of light.

A loud snort interrupted the steady flow of snores. I grinned; had I won yet? Had I woken the sleeping beast? With an irritable groan, Bowser hiked the sheets overhead and continued to snore full blast. I frowned; no not yet.

Damn.

As I crept closer, icy splashes of light leaked onto his blood-red sheets in white streams. Nothing I did worked so it looked like I'd have to do things the old fashioned way. I crept on my tiptoes until I found the edge of the massive bed. Determined, I stared at the snoring mass intently. _Oh _I was going to wake him up alright.

Well desperate times call for desperate measures.

A mental picture popped into my head: I would scream into his eardrums. Laughing under my breath, I crawled onto the bed, gently making my way over. He was completely under cover and I could make out the unmistakable print of his horns against the quilt. Closer and closer I slipped nearer to my prize; I was smiling wickedly.

With deep inhalation I was ready to scare the living daylights out of him. But really, do things ever work the way I plan them to?

Of course not.

Perhaps I should have noticed how the heavy snoring stopped or how he lay completely still. A large hand catapulted from underneath the satin blankets in a flash, locking onto me. I shrieked as the massive hand wrapped around my waist painfully. I was roughly smashed against something warm and hard.

In the cool predawn light I found myself eye to eye with a snarling Bowser, who looked all but furious an outsider was bold or dumb enough to intrude upon his sleep. Bowser's murderous expression faded into stupor, "…Wuh? Flower?"

"_Yes_?" I squeaked. I couldn't move because his grip was _that _tight.

He ran his free hand over his face and groaned, "Not _this _dream again…"

My eyes grew so wide they could have fallen out of my head; what kind of dreams does he have where I'm sitting…?

_Oh Stars_.

Blushing, I slapped a hand to my face; I'm straddling the King of Koopas like some kind of desperate romance novel heroine. _Smooth move Daisy. _While I was deriding my lack of foresight, I didn't notice Bowser's interested stare. A large clawed-hand drifted onto my hip and gave an experimental squeeze.

I shrieked, peering at him incredulously. I slapped at his intrusive hand, "W-What the hell!? Keep your hands to yourself Mr. Gropey-groper!"

Bowser looked even more shocked, "That's never happened before in a dream…_Wait_…"

_"Daisy?_!" he asked skeptically, as if he realized I wasn't a figment of his imagination.

"Um…hiya Bowser?" I waved sheepishly.

The King of Koopas appeared stunned, as if trying to mentally process what the heck was going on. I wasn't going to stay long enough for him to get his mental bearings. So I handled things in the most mature way possible: by attempting to give a half-ass explanation and then get the heck out of there.

The longer he stared, the hotter my face grew, "Um…Iwassentheretomakesureyou'reawakeandyouarenows oI'llgonowbye!"

I moved to dismount but his grip on my hip tightened. Bowser grinned devilishly. I gulped; oh Stars no, this was not good at all. Something tells me he's come to his senses and was ready to play dirty.

"Not so fast my little Desert dessert," by now his smile was nothing less than hellacious, "So you came to wake me up, hmm?"

Deflect and be direct, "Bowser you have to w-wake up and go to meetings and—"

"Forget the meetings," he was purring, plucking a playful claw on the side of my hip, "Why don't we just have some fun here…?"

"_Bowser_!" I gasped, face red as I punched his arm, "Kamek sent me in here to wake you up—!"

"Kamek was behind this?" Bowser made a thoughtful look, "Well in that case remind me to give him a bonus, a very_ large_ bonus at that. Keeping that Geezer around is finally starting to pay off…He knows exactly _how_ to serve his king…"

"Bowser! If you don't let me go this instant…!" I flushed from being both angry and embarrassed.

"So then I guess a kiss to jump-start the day is out of the question huh?" he chuckled.

I didn't think words were needed as I glowered heatedly. Bowser sighed dramatically, "Such a cold-hearted woman you are princess. Alright, let me get up so I can start my day."

I glared at him incredulously, "_Let_ you get up?! _You're_ the one holding _me_!"

With a chuckle Bowser patted my hip before sitting up. I hopped off as he stretched, popping his spine loudly. He let out one last humongous yawn—roar more like it—before he looked like my direction.

"Hmm," Bowser purred, "I like this."

"Like what?"

The mischievous edge to his appearance softened, "Waking up to your face."

"Huh?"

Startled by such an answer, I blinked stupidly as he smirked. I was so busy trying to make sense of his statement that I barely noticed when he rose from bed. The doors to the room creaked open as Kamek stuck his head in, "Princess Daisy are you alive?"

"She had _better _be you old coot!" A jeweled-scepter bopped the old Magikoopa upon the head.

I laughed, "Of course I am! And Bowser's up too."

"His majesty is awake?" Kamek looked very pleased for some reason, "Great! Then I'll get the morning staff at his door pronto."

"Morning staff?" But before I could get my answer Kamek disappeared.

The telltale pitter-patter of water meant a shower. I almost fell out of the bed when I heard singing. _Bowser sings in the shower!? Stars that's hilarious._ That alone would probably have Mario dying with laughter. Since it was indecent for a princess to occupy the bed of a man who wasn't her groom, I hopped down and peddled around the room.

Even as curious as I was to know what Bowser held in different armories and desk drawers, I stuck to being polite. As I studied stone carvings and book titles, Bowser reentered the room. I read plaques underneath the statues, trying to figure out who each Koopa was and what time era they ruled.

"Clawdus Koopa," I heard his voice from somewhere in the room.

"Who?"

"Clawdus Koopa," Bowser replied. He had a large towel around his waist as he toweled off his head of shaggy mane. He continued to recite, "supreme ruler of the Darklands circa 1620. Lord Clawdus was the first sovereign to form a binding pact with the magiKoopa as indentured servants. Though famed for his exploits for border expansion, he is hailed as the first king to introduce magic into the Darklands."

"Wow," he had that plaque memorized verbatim, "Do you know all of your ancestors' histories?" I asked.

He smirked, "_Of course_. Mustn't all rulers know their great ancestors and what their rises and falls were? Otherwise how are we supposed to learn from them?"

Truthfully, I only knew a handful of my ruling ancestors and even then they stuck out because they did great or terrible feats. I continued to ponder his words as he walked—hey no stomping! Maybe he was only heavy when he wore his shell.

Without it he looked taller and leaner all the way around. Peach and I had discussed within countless phone calls how absolutely delectable Ryu was but she'd be surprised when I told her Bowser wasn't too bad on the eyes either.

Tall, strong and ridiculously built; something told me he was the epitome of Koopa male perfection and would have no trouble having his pick of Koopa ladies. He padded to a massive dressing drawer and plucked out something black and silky.

He peered at me and seemed genuinely surprised I was watching. I continued to study him; if his skin wasn't orange and scaly, he could almost pass off as human. Bowser's face morphed into something sly, "Are you just going to watch the show?"

"Show? What are you—?"

Grinning, Bowser tugged his towel a notch lower and arched an eyebrow, waiting for me to catch on.

And I did.

"Oh! _Oh Stars_!" I squeaked. I blushed furiously and quickly spun away from him.

His amused chuckle was rich like chocolate as my face grew hotter and hotter. There was a rustle of fabric as he continued to laugh. _Stars I'm such an idiot. The Koopa wants to get dressed and here I am staring like an idiot!_

"P-Perhaps I should leave you for modesty's sake?" I asked, my voice nothing more than a shrill squeak.

"I'm almost done Flower," again I tried to ignore how amused he sounded.

Bastard, if I didn't know any better I'd think he was enjoying watching me squirm. There was a heavy _thunk _as Bowser placed on his usual shell. A large arm patted my shoulder, "Well, shall we begin the day Flower?"

"Yeah…sure."

Bowser forced his doors open with an enviable ease as we strolled out. What would the staff think as we walked out of his suite? A woman leaving a man's quarters—especially a royal lady—could be denounced as promiscuous.

And the last thing I'd need was a rumor of fooling around with the Darklandian king. But my fears were unfounded as the servants were not bothered. In fact they only wished us a good morning. Bowser grumbled angrily, tightening his grip upon my shoulder as he snatched a large spiked-mug of coffee.

"What's in this?" He growled, squinting at the smoking beverage.

"It is the premium Darklandian Koopa blend of black lava coffee beans."

"I want this shit _potent_. Potent enough to throw an entire town of Goombas into seizure, turn piss rainbow and impregnate an entire Yoshi herd. So I ask again. Is this _potent_?"

I arched an eyebrow as the servant looked confused, "Uh...yes sire...?"

Eyes narrowed, Bowser took a sip. He shivered, "_Whoooooa_! Stars! Now _that's _how I like my coffee: a glass of kick ass. Now let's go."

I looked at Bowser and laughed; huh who knew that the king of Koopas needed coffee to get up in the morning. Back when I believed him as evil, I never would have guessed that he needed to sleep. And if he did sleep, he would breathe fire as he snored.

I also pictured the bedroom of the evil Koopa king filled with torture devices and chains but all he had were prettily matched silk blankets and pillows. Note to self; _never_ tell him I ever thought he had prettily matched blankets and pillows.

Kammy hovered a few paces in front of the king, citing his itinerary. While Kammy prattled off, Kamek repeated everything said, only at a more reasonable pace for Bowser to comprehend. Bowser took a bend in the hallway and all the servants scrambled after. We were on our way to the dining hall, "Are the twins and Junior going to join us?"

"Not today, we've got official kingdom business to see to. Junior would be bored and the twins? Oh Stars. Those little knuckleheads would do something really _stupid_," then he smirked, "What? Can't be around the imposing king without his kids?"

I flushed a bit, "N-No! That's not it at all! I was just curious."

When we reached the dining hall, the chefs waited in single file, greeting their king. They graciously took our breakfast orders and Bowser ordered everything imaginable. I asked for an apple tart pastry and vanilla oatmeal with orange juice.

The chefs ran into the kitchen and began whipping up our order; geesh these Koopas acted as if their lives depended on this! Maybe it did…I wouldn't want to deal with a hungry, cranky eight foot turtle either. Before Bowser could help me into my chair, my breakfast was served and the majority of his food sat on the table, steam rising in a delectable fog. Like usual Bowser ate like a beast, devouring twelve servings of eggs, eight large pancakes and sucking down ten glasses of orange juice.

I sat beside Bowser in a chair crafted just for me; it was aquamarine, extremely cushy and dainty. I quit gawking at Bowser's sordid table manners and resumed nibbling my half-eaten pastry. The chefs had made it in the shape of a heart. It wasn't missed how my meals here had been prettily embellished with extra garnishes, cutlery inscribed with my name in delicate cursive; Bowser had spoiled me in thousands of subtle ways.

"You enjoying the food princess?" Bowser grinned.

"Yes it's really delicious!" I beamed, shoveling another spoonful of oatmeal into my mouth, "And your food is served fast too!"

"Hmm," Bowser seemed pleased as he continued his meal.

After breakfast I thanked the chefs for their hard work. I was rewarded when they blushed, bashful at the given praise. Next we set out for the clown car with Kammy and Kamek trailing behind.

Bowser flipped switches, grinning in satisfaction as the roar of the turbines growled like a piranha. He patted the sleek paint job fondly, "_Ah_, I love the purr of a powerful engine as much as I love the aroma of a woman's perfume."

I shook my head; _boys and their toys._

While Bowser checked the clown copter's systems, I laughed at the apprehensive expression plastered onto Kamek and Kammy's faces. They sat in the seats and hurriedly fastened their seat beats, urging me to do likewise.

"Last time I was in here," Kammy whispered, face a bit pale, "He did these _loops. _Barrel rolls he called them. Ugh, I almost lost my lunch."

Kamek groaned, holding his stomach, "If he does it again I _am _going to hurl."

"Hey Geezer," Bowser cut a wild grin at his advisor, " Ready to do some barrel rolls? We're gonna go up and down and up and down and up and down—"

"_Oh Stars_," Kamek groaned, "I think I'm going to be sick..."

He bellowed with laughter as Kamek covered his mouth, face turning an awful shade of green. Kammy squeezed her eyes shut. I went over and slapped his bicep, "Leave them alone!"

He was still guffawing, "I was _kidding_!"

We soared through the air, clouds soaring by in fluffy white tufts as the Darklandian soil expanded below like spilled ink. Half an hour found the clown copter easing into descent. We had arrived in the Smokelands burrow, a city composed of dark skyscrapers, inky citadels and charcoal towers.

There was a fierce cheer at the clown copter's arrival and the moment Bowser hopped out of the clown car, a deafening celebration rose from the citizens as he blew an impressive sprout of fire. The crowd huddled around Bowser, speaking their adorations as reporters and news cameras focused onto his glorious visage. I was bothered as Koopettes cried, blowing kisses and shouting 'I love you my king!'.

As we traveled through the throngs of lovesick Koopettes, some of them _felt up_ his arms and shell adoringly. A few of the bolder ones tried to fondle his tail and Koopettes bluntly told him _exactly_ what they wanted to do to him. Add in the unnecessary touching, suggestive winks and showy licking of the lips; where were these ladies' shame!? I blushed at the racy exclamations but Bowser only smirked knowingly.

Bowser wrapped an arm around my shoulders and ushered us inside the conference building. Koopas of all sizes and colors waited in a long snaking line; what were they waiting for? An elevated stage was set up, holding a desk inscribed with the royal Darklandian insignia and a throne for the king.

The king belched a flame before taking his seat. As instructed by the Smokelandian patrol, Koopa citizens came up to the stage and recited complaints, issues and problems they wished to see fixed. How interesting, Darklandian citizens could speak to their reigning sovereign face to face.

There was no way that was possible in Sarasaland; all matters were solved by the governing council. Though the citizenry choose and elected their officials, they couldn't select their king; it was a birthright. Bowser sat, arms-crossed and expression stern as he listened. Kamek and Kammy played scribe, recording worthwhile ideas. I was impressed with the citizens too, as each request was reasonable. No one asked for something outlandish like a fortune of one million coins.

_"Lord Bowser, on Fire avenue there are a pack of stray chain chomps that have been scaring off my blitties, do you think you could look into that? I can't run a stray shelter without blitties…"_

_"King Bowser the Great Lava elementary academy has monetary problems and we can't afford to pay for every child's fieldtrip fees, could you lend a donation to our school?"_

_"The Roaring Rapids river has been getting dry, can you provide our laboratory with a stipend? We would be happy to have our scientists look into the cause."_

A baker requested funds to expand her flourishing business into the Mushroom kingdom and another citizen was simply tired of driving down a road filled with potholes. Once the line had died away to the last citizen—this task took several hours mind you—we moved on.

We arrived at the Ashlands burrow, an overcast city covered in the soot of ashes. And here Bowser, Kamek and Kammy performed the same task: recording the citizens' pleas. Once the plight was heard, Bowser rose to his feet and shook their hand. Most citizens flushed graciously, humbled by the opportunity to shake hands with their king.

Some citizens after their request even challenged him to a feat of strength. One Koopatroopa laughed, "King Bowser I challenge you to arm-wrestling!"

I stared, "_What...?!"_

"As the most powerful Koopa of the land, Lord Bowser is always challenged to feats of strength," Kammy held a note of pride in her voice, "Everyone _marvels _at his awe-inspiring might!"

"I want to see if the king is as strong as they say!" the troopa laughed.

"Then step on up," Bowser grinned, motioning him forward with a flick of his claw.

And with that, Bowser accepted the Koopa's challenge and no matter how much the troopa struggled, Bowser's beefy bicep didn't budge. With a wicked grin Bowser pinned the troopa's arm, crushing the table under his might.

We stopped at the Coallands burrow and performed this same task. By the time we returned to the castle it was late afternoon and I was thoroughly exhausted. I was impressed with the Darklands servitude of its citizenry. The visits to the different burrows allowed the general public to meet with their king and have their voices heard. Literally!

This is a practice we humans should employ in our very own monarchies. It would show our citizens that not only do their opinions matter dearly to us but we as their ruling body are willing to incorporate their ideas. Public relations would be phenomenal and we'd have a more trusting citizenry who would recognize our dedication.

Class, status or wealth wouldn't be a limiting factor; anyone who needed our help could stop by. I told Bowser of this, admiring the face-to-face meetings and by the time I was finished praising the Darklands' system, he was so full of himself it was hilarious.

I finished chewing the last bits of an apple tart, a quick munchie just before dinner as Bowser licked his claws clean from the last of his burger. Bowser chuckled, "My, my look at you Flower. Always so messy."

When Bowser wiped at my cheek, his huge claws nearly smothered me. Even with good intentions he still couldn't do a simple task. Laughing, I forced his hand away, "I'll do it myself! Just don't kill me!"

Bowser grinned as I cleaned the sweet smear from my cheek. He grinned, tapping his cheek and wriggling his eyebrows, "Me next. Clean me up next!"

He bent forward, allowing me to wipe the remaining crumbs from his face. As he purred, I laughed; this Koopa couldn't possibly be the evil king Bowser. Someone nearby cleared their throat and both of us looked up. Kamek and Kammy stood nearby, both of them watching with differing expressions. Kamek was smirking, looking very smug as Kammy looked almost horrified.

"Your lordship, perhaps you should ready yourself for the meeting," Kammy waved her wand and a clock materialized out of thin air.

He rolled his eyes, "Alright, let's just go before I decide to cancel the meeting."

"Great!" I chirruped happily, "Can I come with?"

Bowser growled, "Follow me. Let's get this over with."

We reached a large weathered wooden door. Kammy turned to me and spoke in an anecdotal tone, "Forged with the palace's genesis, this court room has been used since the tenth century."

"It's that old?" I hummed.

"Quite," Kammy looked pleased, "It only speaks of the late king's ingenuity. The brilliance, the sheer mastery of architecture and—"

She halted, "Oh. I forgot my train of thought."

Bowser laughed, "It was something about nothing."

Kammy frowned, face wrinkling.

I blinked, "What is it?"

"Princess I don't think it would be such a good idea for you to accompany us this meeting," Kammy replied.

Bowser arched an eyebrow and crossed his arms, "Kammy what's the meaning of this? All day long you've been nagging me about attending this meeting and now that I finally am, you want to _stop me?_!"

"Not quite Your Nastiness," she fixed her glasses; I'm beginning to learn that's a nervous tick of hers, "I am just…anxious is all."

"About what?" Kamek asked and then his voice lowered, "About _them_? The council?"

"Tonight's council isn't just any council Kamek," she spat out furiously, "Tonight Lord Bowser shall meet with…the elders of the Firelands."

Seeing as I know absolutely nothing of the Darklands, I decided to gauge Bowser and Kamek's reactions. Bowser's visage became grimmer as Kamek suddenly froze. I looked between Kammy and Bowser who seemed to both be silently stewing.

"Oy," Kamek spoke softly, "_Them_."

"So what's up with the Firelands council?" I asked.

Kammy continued, "The Firelands is the richest of the five burrows within the Darklands so therefore its body is composed of the most esteemed Koopas from multiple noble bloodlines. Our council is magnify—"

"Get. To. The. Point. Hag!" Bowser snarled, snapping his fingers with each word.

"Erm yes, my apologizes your grace," she fixed her glasses again, "I believe the council will not take well to my presence, let alone Miss Daisy."

Kamek blinked, stunned as Bowser frowned, "Yeah? And just why would that be?"

"Sire, I myself have no problems with Miss Daisy," Kammy shook her head, "In fact I think she is quite humorous and refreshing. However we all know the Firelands council is _very_ set in their ways: entitled, chauvinistic louts the lot of them."

"So they won't like me 'cause I'm a girl?" I puffed, "_Please_, I've dealt with hundreds of haughty kings and rulers who think less of me because I'm a chick."

Kammy shook her head, "You don't quite understand princess…You see…Well, you're also a_ human_. The distrust between Koopas and humans is significant in the Firelands. Hatred is probably a more suiting adjective."

"Kammy's right, human hatred is a hot button issue in the Firelands," Kamek nodded his head in agreement.

"Hmm," Bowser's eyes tightened; he must have seen some kind of truth to her words, "Well I'll let those old geezers know _stat_ I'm the damned king."

"Very well," Kammy replied, "But here are some ground rules for the meeting princess."

"Okay…?"

"Do not speak unless spoken to, do not ignore the Firelands elders' words if spoken to, do not stare at the elders for longer than five seconds, keep a straight face at all times, do not react to anything negative they say, and under all circumstances, do _not_ forget to address Lord Bowser as—"

"Kammy! Enough already!" Kamek chuckled, "Don't overload the young lady's brain!"

Kammy shook her head, "Very well. But at the very least we must find the princess suitable attire."

I blinked, "Huh?"

"Come now, don't be _dense_," Kammy snapped with thinning patience, "It is highly inappropriate for a woman to show skin. Look what you're wearing, you would be misconstrued as a harlot."

I peered at my clothes: a thin tank-top and shorts. How did I miss that? My court would have a fit knowing I wore so little. Despite how much more progressive things have become, one truth remained the same: to be taken seriously women needed to be covered. And in most cases, princesses needed full length dresses.

I gulped, suddenly self-conscious, "She's right...I need an evening gown."

Bowser's lips quirked into a slippery grin, "I think she looks just_ fine_."

"That just _proves _I need something else to wear!" I laughed.

I returned, wearing a fashionable red evening gown and matching red lace gloves. It was another purchase of Wendy's. Its cut and cloth was Darklandian, crafted to flatter a woman's form. While Sarasalandian dresses were tailored to cover a woman's form, Darklandian dresses were made to draw attention _to_ a nice figure.

And this dress fit well. _Too _well for a modest princess; it drew attention to my bust and hips and almost made my innocent, petite figure seem like a vixenish kerokero bottle. Bowser's burning stare only made my cheeks glow redder.

Kammy sighed, "When I said 'suitable attire', this gown was _not_ what I had in mind!"

Flustered, I threw my arms out, "This was the most _modest _eveningdress in my closet, alright!? Wendy decked out my closet with mini skirts and short dresses! And for Stars' sake Bowser, would you _quit staring_!? Like you've never seen a _girl _before!"

Bowser laughed softly, "I just think you look nice. _Sheesh."_

"Oh this is a_ disaster_!" Kammy moaned, burying her face in her palms, "Let's not bring the princess along at all then."

"She is fine!" Kamek smiled reassuringly, "Princess Sarasaland looks like a respectable young woman. The only problem is that she just _happens_ to be beautiful."

I blushed, "Kamek..."

"It's done," Bowser grinned, "She's a princess, she's hot, and has a ravishingly perky figure (This made me gasp). Can we go now?"

Kammy nodded uneasily, twirling her scepter nervously. Bowser glowered as he turned to face the door, an imposing visage present. Before entering, he looked at me, "Stay by my side Flower."

His gaze was piercing, as if he was trying to communicate. I swallowed; what was this meeting going to be like?

"…Okay," I replied.

Bowser nodded his head, slamming the doors open with a shuddering rattle. In he walked, strutting confidently like the dictator he was. At his appearance the council Koopas rose to their feet, heads inclined. Kamek and Kammy were at Bowser's side as I trailed behind.

The Firelands councilors were old, scaly hides wrinkled and bodies hunched with age. Where Bowser's mane was thick and red like wildfire, their manes were thinning and white; I guess Bowser really was young. I had to wonder if the stiff, callous expressions were due to the wears and tears of old age or if they were simply pretentious.

The Firelands Koopas were uniformly garbed in rich ruby-red shells and matching capes. I didn't miss the blatant sneers Kammy received. _So that's what Kammy meant hmm? Well it'll be interesting the moment they see me…_

Then it happened; the elders caught sight of the small human princess. Their expressions morphed into dark leers. Eyes glowered and snouts coiled with smoke as they watched something akin to a bird eyeing a worm. When I walked passed one elder, he had the audacity to try to touch the fabric of my gown. I moved away, glaring indignantly.

"Don't touch me," I snapped.

And like a lit powdered keg, there was an explosion. One moment there's silence and then the next an 'esteemed' Koopa was inches away, snarling with brandished claws.

"How _dare _you speak to us that way you filthy little human mongrel—"

Before I could react, Bowser stepped between us and unearthed a bloodcurdling roar. The Firelands Koopas staggered back, surprised. Bowser began to snarl, slashing his claws, motioning at me. He growled in deep tones. I halted; he was speaking in a Koopa language. The grunts and snarls were words, communicating in a linguistic I couldn't understand.

Kammy and Kamek clucked with incoherent squabbles and soon the entire Firelands council joined, growling and snarling. Bowser pointed to me and slammed a fist against his carapace in a gesture worthy of an alpha. He roared as he pounded his fists against his carapace.

The elders directed cold gazes my way. I suppose the fight had been settled for now because Bowser turned around, vestiges of anger lingered on his face. When Bowser spoke, his words sounded brusque, as if he was going in between both languages at once, "Take a seat."

"What's going on?" I asked softly, "You can tell me."

"_Take a seat_," he snarled, eyes commanding me to obey.

I frowned; _whoa_. Where in the world did this attitude come from? His eyes narrowed further at a show of my defiance; did he really expect me to follow his order? What? And after I sit does he want me to bark too? I placed my hands on my hips and demanded, "Bowser, tell me what's going on."

Bowser froze as the Koopa counselors' heads snapped in my direction. I _immediately_ knew I made a grave mistake. What had Kammy warned against? Under no circumstances do not address the king by...name.

_Shit._

From my peripheral vision I saw Kamek slap his hand to his head as Kammy winced. The councilKoopas's snarls curled into a sinister mockery of laughter.

"Did the human girl just call him _Bowser_?"

"My, what an utter lack of respect," one of the elder's purred.

"But we all know that _no one_ speaks to the king that way without any…_consequences,_" another elder snarled, teeth revealed in a cold smile.

"I smell a lashing…" Another Koopa purred.

"Or perhaps they know each other a bit more…_intimately_?" Another awful grin from another Firelands elder.

"That would explain her apparel. She wants our attention."

For a split second Bowser appeared apologetic, as if he was about to do something against his will. Then his expression iced over caustically. The telltale sign of anger appeared, a thin trail of smoke wafting from his maw. He glowered as he made a deliberate show of crossing his arms.

He arched an eyebrow and when he spoke, smoke trailed between sharp fangs, "I must have heard you wrong _princess_ but no one calls me 'Bowser.' But I suppose I can forgive you, knowing you Sarasaland hicks are a bunch of stupid, ill-mannered fucktards."

I gasped, stunned he would say something that vicious. In the face of the growing laughter, my cheeks burned; what would possess him to say something like that!? I blinked, unsure if I was shell-shocked or fighting back tears, "B-Bowser?"

"What did I _just_ say dumbass!?" he snapped, "It's _King_ Bowser."

I remained wordless. I felt betrayed; I would have felt better if he had slapped me across the face.

Bowser chuckled darkly, "Look toots, only a skirt I'm banging can drop the king title. Keep trying my patience and I'll drop you over my knee and give you a spanking. Bet you'd like it though. I'll hike that lil' red skirt up and spank ya 'til you scream. Want that?"

Flushing from the roots of my hair, I wordlessly shook my head. The elders' awful laughter were howling screeches. Bowser shook his head, as if pained by how dumb I was, "You humans are slow, idiotic creatures. How your kind has survived so long astounds me."

The council laughed, not even bothering to hide their glee at my reprimand. One of the council members was so charmed that he even said, "Your cruelness! Please go easy on the human girl! Humans don't know any better!"

"Poor human," another Koopa shook his head, "They just don't learn until you snap at them. Dumb brutes."

"Just let the girl take a seat already," another elder waved a hand dismissively through the air, "we have matters we must look after now."

"What an ignorant little _Feosaura,_" one of them said clearly.

Kammy whirled around furiously as Kamek snarled. Bowser glared, visible black smoke wafting from his nose, yet he did nothing. Why do I feel that word was something _really_ nasty in their language?

And instead of pulling my chair out, Bowser pointed at the seat as if I was a pet. I stared incredulously and just for a moment, there was a visible flash of something different in Bowser's eyes. The hard stare didn't seem as menacing as it once was. I didn't put up a fight. I marched over to my seat.

I glowered, seething silently. So were we only friends when it was just the two of us? Was this the treatment I would receive when he was around other powerful governing Koopas? Bowser took his seat at an elevated podium. I could _feel _the intrusive stares upon my person. I glared; they eyed me critically as if looking for a weakness.

"Let us now start the meeting," Kamek replied and Bowser banged the gavel against the stone desk.

Kammy shot a sympathetic look at me before taking her seat beside Bowser. For the duration of the meeting, the council tried to push their slanted agendas on Bowser. They wished to solely and selfishly fatten their own pockets.

Most of their inquiries seemed good-natured but when denied enough, their true intentions became apparent. One Firelands member asked for a fund to increase his mining company's resources and labor hours. Bowser disapproved the motion.

Furious at the dismissal, the Koopa councilor retaliated. He threatened to close the mining industry, which would leave thousands unemployed. But when Bowser all but openly threatened to come down to the mines and destroy it inch by inch, the Firelands Koopa accepted his loss and sulked quietly for the rest of the meeting.

And whenever the Firelands council became frustrated with Bowser's lack of cooperation, I became their therapeutic pincushion. That word _Feosaura _would keep popping up. I don't know the strength of hate behind the word, but I know it had to be bad with the dirty looks Kamek and Kammy gave the council members.

"I simply do not understand why she is here sire," one older Firelands Koopa spoke; oh even better, they spoke as if I wasn't present in the room.

"She is the crown princess of the Sarasaland kingdom and she is here for the commerce between our two kingdoms," Bowser growled, "Unlike you she represents her people well."

"Sarasaland?" Another Koopa decided to cut in, "We are a wealthy nation your lordship, only Sarasaland benefits from our trade. The less contact we have with the shell-less the better."

"I would understand if perhaps you wished to do commerce with Princess Peach," another Koopa spoke, a sneer upon his face as he studied me, "The wealth of the Mushroom kingdom would greatly aid and fatten our pockets."

"Lord Bowser, while I can see why you are interested in keeping the princess here, you must not let your 'interest' for the human girl get in the way of reason," an elder chuckled, "Ah, I remember when I was once a young Koopa your age Lord Bowser…"

"Don't let these trysts become mistakes."

"Mistakes…?" Bowser growled.

"I remember once," one Koopa began, speaking to his friend as if they were having a side conversation and weren't in the middle of a meeting, "I had a _feosaura_ that looked kind of like her; big eyes, pink lips. She was a good slave to me."

I froze.

"A pleasure slave?"

A chuckle, "Of course."

"They don't have to be smart, just smart enough to follow your instructions!" the crowd laughed.

"Sit! Heel! Obey! Down!"

I stared, mouth agape. I was horrified and infuriated by the things I had just heard. They laughed as if it were a joke. As their laughter flooded the room, Bowser released a snarl. He slammed a large fist down, shattering the podium into pieces. That got their attention quick.

"How dare you _all_," he growled thickly, "I don't care how much you old coots don't like the princess but I said she's mine. _Mine!_ And anything that belongs to me is to be respected! If you Koopa value your heads attached to your shoulders then you won't say another stupid thing about my princess. _You hear me?_! And I don't _ever_ want to hear that word attached to the princess _eve_r."

The room shook with his furious shouts and the council was dead quiet. Kamek was silent, mouth fit into a tight frown as Kammy applauded Bowser for his rousing speech. Bowser sank into his seat, rubbing his temples wearily, "Whatever. We've discussed enough for today, I'll see all of you next week and by then you'd better come in here with the correct attitudes."

Kamek slammed the gavel—into what I don't know since Bowser all but obliterated their desk—ending the meeting and just as the council was starting to filter out, I pushed and shoved past them all.

"Princess!"

"Princess Daisy _wait_!"

I had to get out. I was furious, anger coursing wildly through my veins. My heart raced, eyes blurring and burning with the annoying sting of tears. I had to get to a place where I could think clearly and not broil over from the sheer ignorance and stupidity of what I had experienced today.

Going to my guest chambers was too obvious of a place where Bowser, Kamek and Kammy would find me. I paused, taking the elevator to the roof. The roof was a nice, quiet place to think and I'm sure it'd afford me some time to be by myself.

I went to the edge of the infamous Bowser's keep and stood, looking over the kingdom and the flickering lights as they lit around the kingdom. It was sundown, so it's no surprise the lights were starting to glow. I took a seat upon the cool rooftop and stared at the horizon. My consciousness of the world dissolved away and the only thing I could think of was the brilliance of the fading sun in the sky.

* * *

><p>I don't know how much time passed as the sky glowed a soft shade of purple. The warmth was starting to drain from the sky as a cool breath of night air moved in. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard large, clambering footsteps storming towards me. If I had to guess I'd say Bowser was furious.<p>

The loud stomping stopped right behind me, "Do you know how _long _I've had the entire castle looking for you?!"

I didn't respond. I should have figured Bowser's ego didn't take kindly to being ignored. He'd hate to be ignored. There was a deep growl and then a big hand gripped my shoulder. He spun me around, "Hey! I'm _talkin_' to you here!"

I was starting to feel calm and tranquil until his furious energy transferred to me. A sneer twisted my lips as I tried to pull away, "Who do you think you are grabbing me like that?! You let go of me!"

"You run away from the meeting in a storm and what am I supposed to think!?" he roared back.

"Yeah? And how dare you say I belong to you! I'm _not _an object!" I spat, trying to shake his hand from my person.

Although Bowser cooled his jets, he was still frowning as I spoke, "Those…those _assholes_ were belittling me with every single opportunity they could take. I didn't care what they were saying about me! But when you—!"

At this I poked him in the chest, "You _punished _me like _a misbehaved pet_ and they really loved that! You showed me Bowser. You corrected the _feosaura_ right before everyone's eyes!"

Bowser shook my shoulders lightly, "Don't _ever _say that word again."

I must have been out of my mind because I laughed, "What? _Feosaura!_? Just because I don't speak reptile, Koopa or whatever it is you guys speak—doesn't mean I can't pick up when I'm being insulted! _I'm not a stupid human like you think or treat me like_!"

There must have been something about my expression because Bowser's anger transformed into a sympathetic visage,"Flower, I don't think that about you at_ all_."

"Then why!" I didn't even realize that I was crying, "Why did you embarrass me in front of all of them? Why? I thought we were friends! A-Aren't we?"

Bowser suddenly picked me up into his arms and I struggled, clawing and striking at him, "No! _Put me down_! I don't want to be held by you! Go back to all of your _stupid _ Koopa pals! I see now the world doesn't want our friendship—the officials in Sarasaland don't want me to like you 'cause you're a Koopa, and your councilors don't like me because I'm a human. So is that it? Our friendship is gonna be defined by a bunch of idiots!? We're not gonna be friends because people say we're too different?!"

Fighting against him futilely made my muscles ache, and the stern, somber expression on his face made my fury dissolve. My face contorted, preparing to cry once more and Bowser's hardened visage broke as he whispered softly, "Don't cry Flower. Don't do that to me. Sorry I couldn't protect you in there...But I won't let it happen ever again, okay? Just...don't cry anymore...it's tearing me apart. Anyone who says you can't be my friend can go to hell. You're mine. And...And I'm _not _gonna give you up."

As I sobbed into his shoulder, Bowser held me against him wordlessly. I don't know how long I sobbed but Bowser held onto me protectively. By the time I finished crying my eyes out like a baby, the sky was dark blue and the stars burned like thousand of tiny lights. Bowser had set me beside him and we both wordlessly stared off into the night sky. With a tired sigh, I rested my head onto his torso, feeling the steady beat of his heart.

* * *

><p>Alice: Trouble in paradise? And what's a feosaura? Any guesses? XP Hmm, probably not...Lol! Stay tuned for part two and why don't ya drop a review? ^_^<p> 


	15. Desert: Midnight Rooftop

Alice: (Walks into room) Hey Ultrra.

Ultrra: (Sips tea) What's up Alice.

Alice: Oh nothing, went to the bank, went to the store, bought icecream. (Goes online and checks reviews) Hey wanna hear a funny joke I heard today?

Ultrra: (Blank stare) NO. ALL your jokes are lame.

Alice: Hehe, so a naked chicken walks into a bar…(email loads)

Ultrra: (Glares) I thought I said no jokes!

Alice: And then there's a hippo right? So then the hippo says—(Sees all the reviews) O_O

Ultrra: Well since you started the story, you might as well finish it.

Alice: There's sooooo many reviews! XD Chyeah! I…I can't breathe! Having faint…attack…thing!

Ultrra: Won't believe it until I see it.

Alice: All these reviews are awesome! (talking to computer screen) Yes we will learn about Bowser's wife! And I want to thank this reviewer for helping me with the Koopalings! And YES! I've made believers of Bowser X Daisy romances! YES! HAHA!

Ultrra: Alice…

Alice: (Continuing to read reviews) No! I really do love long reviews that way I can hear all your thoughts! :3 And I love random comments, I'm super random too! LOL! And yep…Sounds like the meaning of feosaura was understood. And wow, you even knew the root words O_O I'm truly impressed! XD All this awesome is too overwhelming. And don't feel bad about reviewing! Drop in a line whatever ya feel like it! :)

Ultrra: Alice…

Alice: I can't…handle…so many awesome reviews! Must update story super fast now!

Ultrra:…I think you're malfunctioning…

Alice: Too much awesomeness! Having mental overload!

Ultrra: And also having a self-narration too.

Alice: AXCGEDXSKEDODFFF—( faints)

Ultrra: O_O

Alice: ^-^

Ultrra: ALICE?

Alice: ^-^

Ultrra: (groans) What an airhead. U_U Anyways in this chapter Bowser and Daisy spend a bit more time together and we'll get to learn a little about Bowser's past. Also reviewers you guys are super smart! O_O You guys and girls understood why Bowser acted the way he did! It would have ended badly if he didn't make those bastardly Firelands elders happy. Hmm (rubs chin) Alice is going to have to work real hard to keep this story from being predictable since you guys are on it like white-on-rice-eaten-by-a-polar-bear-in-a-snowstorm .

Alice: Sooo many reviews weeeee!

Ultrra:…Well since Alice is out I might as well ask this. (Smirks) If you read this author's note, then in your review tell us what your favorite color is. Ha, mine's red. So why don't you guys, read, enjoy and review! ;)

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>"Flower you…you're right," Bowser spoke softly, running claws through his thick mane, "I shouldn't have corrected you like that. And I realize…You don't know anything about Darklandian customs and what not."<p>

He looked at me, "I should have told you around anyone who's a potential foe, you ought to address me by title. Such informality is scorned by the Firelands."

"How so?" my voice was hoarse from earlier.

"Anyone who doesn't address their king properly could be seen as showing something as severe as treason. Also…" He arched an eyebrow, "…you're a girl. There's a few…_complications_ with that."

"So girls can't call you by name?"

"Look…Any female who does is essentially admitting we're '_together_'." Bowser grinned lopsidedly.

Oh. I get it, any woman having familiarity with the king must be someone he's bedding. And a rumor like that circulating around would be the last thing I would need. Whew, I couldn't even imagine how bad things would be if Father heard such a rumor.

_Everyone would die, that's what would happen and he'd use Bowser's skin for a coat_.

Hmm yeah, I won't even try to imagine something so terrifying. Bowser shook his head, "The Firelands council would have demanded suitable reparation, maybe even a public punishment."

"But you're the king, what you say goes."

Bowser chuckled, "Believe it or not even the Darklandian king has his limitations. Everything I say goes…so long as the council doesn't vote unanimously against the motion. I have no doubt they would have overturned my decision."

I remained quiet, "They hated me that much?"

My stomach churned uneasily; those Firelands bastards would demand punishment over a minor slip-up? Was it my humanness or defiance they hated? Their blood-red eyes were haunting, ablaze with acidic hatred. It was as if my presence was a venom to their well being.

"I know so," Bowser grimaced, "I did the only thing to prevent that."

The humiliation was to protect me from the wrath of the Firelanders? It made sense now; either Bowser ripped apart my ego or the councilors demanded for my head. The Firelanders were like sharks and the humiliation sated their hunger.

Bowed grumbled softly, "Sorry I had to do that. If it makes you feel better, I _really_ didn't want to."

"Since you've explained things, I understand," I spoke softly, "I just thought you felt the same as those—"

Bowser snarled, cutting me off, "Flower I don't agree with a single thing those idiots said or think."

His anger softened considerably, "Not a single thing, you hear me? I think you're the most amazing human female—no—female I've known period."

I smiled, "…Thank you."

"This problem started ever since my father, King Morton ruled," Bowser pondered out loud.

"Why, what did he do?"

"He was ruthless," Bowser chuckled, "He was the real definition of a tyrant. His subjects didn't admire him, they _feared_ him. He had the council—yes even the Firelands council—quaking and ever since they have been just as vindictive as my father."

His statement made me reflect wisdom Father had shared. It was rare tyrants were loving, kind spouses/parents. If anything the brunt of their cruelty and torment was loosened on those closest to them.

Did Bowser suffer from his father's abusive hand?

"Was your father kind?" I asked but something already told me it wasn't so.

Bowser grinned with no true humor, "Kind? Hell no. Morton may have married my mother but he was evil. He punished servants like slaves, held public executions but the shit he did to mom..."

He closed his eyes, anger apparent, "Mom was always miserable, off crying somewhere. When I was old enough I realized he was a cheating bastard. He had wild, sordid affairs with multiple mistresses and cared little for my mother's feelings."

Then he whispered," I've lost count of all the times I've walked in on him with a koopette, even as a kid...No wonder why she ran off. She fled and never returned."

He continued, "As a kid I used to be a lot like Junior; childlike and innocent but father considered my innocence as pathetic. To 'fix' the problem he took me to bloody feuds, kingdom invasions. My first raid he dragged me to was the Vanilla Dome."

I looked up at him sympathetically, "How old were you when you first went on a raid to pillage and kill?"

Bowser glanced up as if mentally counting in his head, "I'd say seven. That's when I had to kill my first person. I can still remember it clearly; father forced this bleeding man onto his knees and screamed at me to kill him… And I didn't want to disappoint fa—Morton or else he'd punish me. I cried for hours after that…That had to be the worst day of my life. I couldn't sleep for nearly a year after that."

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><p><em>The sky of the Vanilla Dome was a deep blood-red as shrill screams and cries of pain filled the air. The young prince stood in the midst of the battle, watching as Koopas disemboweled and ruthlessly dissected innocent citizens.<em>

_Prince Bowser sobbed, tremors raking through his body as another mangled corpse fell right before his feet. Sniffling, he tried his hardest to hold in his tears but nothing worked. Father would be absolutely furious if he saw him crying._

_But all around him people were dying; harmless, sweet people who had only moments ago been going about with their lives. In the midst of the gore and bloodshed, a woman came over and took his hand within hers, "Come child! We have to get out of here! It's not safe!"_

_For a moment Bowser was tempted to run away with her but if Father knew he had run away like a coward, then these people would suffer even more. His father was always really scary when he was angry._

_When the nameless woman met resistance, she turned and looked at the Koopa prince. She didn't see the tall Darklandian soldier approaching her from behind, smiling grimly. And as death loomed closer to her, she smiled sweetly at Prince Bowser, unknowing of the looming danger, "Don't be afraid child, take my hand and we'll both get awa—"_

_Bowser gasped, turning his head and clenching his eyes shut as he saw the soldier's claw cut clean through the woman's torso. There were no gurgles, no cries, the only sound made was her form slumping to the ground. She fell to the floor, face growing ominously pale and tears seeping down her cheeks. Her dark red hair pooled around her face like rivulets of blood. Vaguely the prince could see she was trying to whisper something with her dying breath._

_'…Run child…Get away…'_

_"Sorry lady…" he whispered._

_Bowser shut his eyes again but no matter how hard he squeezed his eyes closed or tried to forget, he couldn't. The Koopa child could still see all the blood, gore and death. He could still smell the smoke, the fires were destroying homes and he could still smell the kind lady's soft perfume when she took his hand._

_And he could still remember her soft smile and bright blue eyes._

_But now she was dead; her face bleached bone-white and gorgeous blue eyes locked into a never ending void._

_"I'm sorry!" Bowser sniffled, calling out to the dead woman._

_"Prince, your father is looking for you," and with that, two burly Darklandian soldiers grabbed both of his arms and took—dragged—him to somewhere._

_The prince tried to ignore all the killings, fire and the blood around him as he was dragged through the dying kingdom. But the stench of old blood and death hung over the village like a venomous cloud. Bowser was halfway hauled up a long flight of stairs, up to a large stone courtyard that led to a burning castle._

_At the top of the stairs stood the strong form of his father. Bowser was greeted with the sight of his father's ebon-black shell and massive spines. The great king spun to face his son and grinned darkly, "Bring him to me."_

_The guards complied and pushed the young prince to his father. Bowser froze the moment he fell under his father's looming shadow. King Morton was a monstrosity, towering over everything by several feet with a frame etched in nothing but corded muscle. His left eye damaged, christened with a long scar as several other old battle scars decorated his arms._

_His bright red mane flowed gloriously halfway down his shell in an unruly blood-red mass. The king clamped his hand down on Bowser's shoulder, either ignoring or missing the way his son winced, "Son, the Vanilla Dome kingdom has fallen under you father's mighty will. But first we have one last score to settle."_

_King Morton snapped his fingers and the guards brought forth a struggling old king. His clothes were bloodied and the fear was bright and wild in his eyes. King Morton narrowed his good eye and grabbed the old monarch by the back of his pelt coat, "Well, what the hell did you think would happen when you piss me off? Look at your kingdom now."_

_The Vanilla Dome king's head was snapped around so he could have an optimal view of his kingdom's destruction. Nothing but dark streams of smoke, bright red fire and cries of pain filled the air. Even the dying cries were starting to grow silent; his kingdom had become a massive grave. The king started to sob._

_Morton grinned, "Look what has happened to your precious little kingdom, it is destroyed and your citizens are dead and those who aren't are envious of those who are gone. Everyone will think of the Vanilla Dome and know…"_

_The king lowered his voice and growled, "you are the fool who tried to defy King Morton."_

_"Please," the king sobbed, "Spare my citizens, it is me alone you wish to punish. Kill me and spare my citizens, their battle was never with you, Morton."_

_With a sneer, King Morton spat to the side, "You're even more pathetic then I imagined. Human scum were never fit to wear crowns on their heads. Bowser. Come."_

_Bowser's head snapped up at the sound of his father's call. The king beckoned his son to approach as Bowser drew nearer, "Y-Yes Father?"_

_"I've decided that this pathetic man is not worthy of death from my own hand," Morton grinned at his son, "therefore you shall kill him."_

_Bowser's eyes grew wide, "M-Me? B-But Father I don't want to hurt him."_

_"Morton please," the old king begged, "Don't have the child do this…Do n-not order him to take a life. That is not good for—"_

_Without a second thought, Morton viciously kicked the king in the side of his face. Bowser cringed at the sound of crunching bone and watched as the old man slumped to the floor. The young prince hoped the king was dead; he looked like he was in so much pain, however the labored breathing said otherwise._

_"This son of a feosaura has openly defied your father," Morton growled, "and you don't want anyone to make you father angry, do you?"_

_"N-No…"_

_"Then kill him," Morton growled, "Use your claws; they're sharp enough to carve through this bastard's heart."_

_"I don't want to Father," Bowser began to cry, wiping at his eyes, "I don't want to hurt him. H-He's sorry for what he's done."_

_Morton drew back, his face a mixture of revolt and surprise, "…What?"_

_"Can we leave him alone?" Bowser sniffled, "H-He said he's sorry. We can forgive him now."_

_"Enough!" Morton snapped, smoke rising from his nostrils. With a growl, he spun to a guard, "Hold the pathetic king."_

_The few guards standing nearby did as they were told and held up the half conscious king. Once his claws were free, Morton raked a furious claw across his son's face. Bowser cried louder as his left cheek began to bleed, but he was hoisted into the air painfully and brought eye to eye with the blazing red eye of his father._

_"Don't be pathetic son," he snarled, shaking the young Koopa, "Your king has given you a damn order and you're going to do it. You hear me boy?"_

_"Y-Yes father," Bowser sobbed._

_"Maybe that's the problem; I've been babying you, far too soft on you," the king narrowed his good eye, "How the hell are you going to run a kingdom one day if you're not bleeding your enemies dry? We are the Darklands and our enemies will regret their transgressions against us! From now on you'll call me Morton. I am your king."_

_"Y-Yes F-Morton," Bowser replied, stammering over his words. The tears stung as they ran down the wound on his face._

_The king dropped his son, "Now, obey your order; kill that bastard."_

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><p>I couldn't find the proper words to express my feelings. Bowser was perfectly impassive, as if such brutality wasn't abnormal. I couldn't decide which was worse: Bowser's nonchalance or his father's cruelty "You had to kill at seven? Oh my Stars. I couldn't even imagine…"<p>

Just what type of psycho, what cruel parent would bring their child to war? Let alone force their child to take a life? I can't picture Junior being asked to kill. King Morton was a psychotic monster.

"Yep," Bowser sounded at ease, "Let's see: I killed at seven, burned someone to death at ten, maimed a traitor at twelve and took my first woman at…"

He trailed off, realizing his mistake and flushing a dark red, "Erm…"

I shook my head, "I'm not judging you Bowser, you can tell me if you want but you don't have—"

"Thirteen," he blurted out, cheeks strawberry-red. He glowered, growling softly.

Bowser stared, earnestly trying to gauge my reaction. Truthfully it took every single fiber in my body to hide my abject horror; I mean _thirteen!?_ His father was a terrible Koopa.

"But it was because your father forced you, didn't he?" I asked him, speaking softly, "Someone that young shouldn't have to do _anything_ like that."

Bowser didn't reply but nodded his head. I raised a hand and stroked his unarmored bicep, "That was really…vile of him to force his son to do something like that."

"He wanted me to become a 'real Koopa' and," his face contorted into a sneer, "real Koopas always had multiple females and—"

He halted, changing his mind about something. For a moment he was silent, "So what were you doing when you were thirteen?"

I laughed, "Thirteen? Hmm, I think I was learning algebra, playing soccer for the royal's girl league and learning how to ballroom dance. I also wondered if I'd ever get hips like Peach."

Bowser squinted an eye, "I wish I could go back in time and see what you looked like. You talk as if you looked soooo bad."

"Picture me now, only shorter, straight as a board—I still am—and with long, frizzy hair and I'd say that's about right."

"Hmm," Bowser looked at me, as if he were trying to 'picture' what I looked like. He laughed and shook his head. I hissed, "See?! I told you it'd be bad!"

"No," he chuckled, "I was just thinking how damn darling you must have been. If I had known you when both of us were thirteen, I probably would have had a mega crush on a certain princess."

I chuckled, "Um, were you big yet at thirteen?"

"'Big'?"

"Yeah like tall?"

"At thirteen I think I was about…hmm," he rolled his eyes up thoughtfully, "I want to say six and a half feet tall."

"Oh wow," I laughed, "I don't think I was even five feet yet!"

Bowser chuckled and shook his head, "What a puny little thing you were, still are actually. You humans are tiny, fragile things. Never got how your species lasted so long."

"What's really odd," I laughed, "is how turtles with such heavy shells can swim! How did Koopas ever come to the land anyways? And how did you get to be so huge?"

We indulged in the warm glow of pleasant conversation. We admired the darkening sky, chattering about nothing and everything. Even after all the turmoil we had uncovered between the two of us—Bowser's horrific childhood and my battle with the Firelands elders—I felt at peace.

"So your father was hard on you too," I said softly, "Is that why you can understand what I've been through? Granted your situation was far worse than mine ever was."

Bowser half-smirked, "Hmm I suppose so. At least your father didn't flog ya. Supposedly it 'toughened' me up. After that day I learned how to stop crying, no matter how intolerable the pain. I even got the scars to prove it too."

Disgusted, I closed my eyes. Bowser purposefully looked away, grinning. Even though he was smiling, his eyes were ice-cold, "Don't look at me that way, it looks sympathetic and pisses me off."

"I'm sorry but…your father sounds…" I grimaced.

"Evil?"

"Barbaric," I finished, spitting the word, "I'm sorry you were stuck with him."

"Heh that's about right," then Bowser's expression relaxed, "And that's why when I'm with Junior or my other kids I want to be the direct opposite of how he was with me, I want them to be able to talk to me and have fun."

I thought of the glow Wendy held when she spoke of Bowser, even the admiring way the twins spoke of their father. They may prank and tease him, but they clearly respected him. And Junior practically sang anytime he was near his idol. But I remembered the cold way Ludwig's eyes gleamed when I spoke of his father.

I may not understand what conflict lies between the two of them but something tells me this wasn't the right time to bring it up. Maybe there'll be another opportunity in the future where I could try to help them patch things up.

"You're a great dad," I patted his knee, "I'm sorry you had to counter your father's awful example."

"Well I'm sorry you had to learn how to be a lady without your mother," he replied.

I flushed at the unexpected comment then laughed, "My father made sure I had Grammy around to teach me everything I know. Also I had Lady Angora who taught me about manners and uh stuff."

"Grammy?" Bowser asked, arching an eyebrow, "Oh wait, I think she's the cute little old lady who watched your uncle get his ass kicked!"

"What are you talking about?"

"Remember? That whole snazzy party you threw? The Soo-goony thing."

I laughed, "You mean _Summani?"_

"Yeah that," Bowser smirked, "I totally owned your uncle in a drinking contest. I wasn't _even _tipsy by the time your uncle was sloshed. Your grandmother thought it was greatest thing. Somehow she balances being elegant, yet down to earth."

I slapped a palm to my face as Bowser chuckled, "Despite being a little out there she's one of the few humans I like. I see a lot of you in her, especially your eyes. It's almost like you got an exact copy of hers."

With a sigh, I rested my face in my hands, "I dunno what to tell you Bowser but my family's kinda crazy. You have my father who's as serious as stone, my Uncle who's carefree and crazy and Grammy is probably the extreme of that. I think the stork got Peach and I mixed up. I think Peach should have been my father's daughter and I should have been born to Uncle."

"Have I told you your power of observation kind of sucks?" Bowser chortled.

"Excuse me?" I frowned.

"It's true," he huffed, grinning a bit, "You're pretty good with things when matters involve everyone else but when it comes to you specifically, your power of observation is awful."

"Explain?" I felt a bit indignant; I would _also_ like to point out how his 'power of observation' sucked. For a guy who's been fighting against Mario nonstop you'd _think _he'd know when to quit. So observe that Bowwy.

Bowser half-shrugged, "You think your dad hates you. I don't even_ see_ how you get that. If anything he's super overprotective because you're _extra _special. Any human who has the balls to stare down a Koopa king has to really, really like his daughter you know?"

I blushed as Bowser grinned, "Am I right or am I right?"

"You can shut up that's what you can do," I grumbled as he laughed.

Another comfortable patch of silence lingered. Bowser admired the moon as I watched the twinkling stars. While I was reflecting, something came to mind. Bowser rested his chin in his hand. He must have felt my gaze as he turned to look at me with an arched eyebrow, "What is it Flower?"

"I was just thinking," I laughed softly, "For as long as I've known you, you've never once mentioned your wife."

Bowser groaned comically, even rolling his eyes with great disdain. I laughed at the sheer amount of angst the memory of his wife brought, "Oh _Stars. _Let's not _even_ go there."

"Come on, if you tell me about her I'll uh…" I paused, raking my mind for something to exchange, "I'll tell you about my suitors?"

Bowser looked at me sharply, his mellowed expression gone, "Say _what_?"

"Will you accept or no?" I grinned at him.

"Obviously," he snorted smoke then rubbed irritably at the back of his neck, "Ugh I can't believe I'm gonna be talking about—So…What do you want to know about _her_?"

I shrugged, "Just anything that comes to mind; what did she look like? How did you meet her? And why aren't you still married to her."

Bowser grumbled softly, looking just as comfortable as a man sitting on tacks, "Her name was Clawdia," as he spoke, he was looking at everything but me, "She has a pink shell and bright blue eyes Wendy inherited from her. She has wavy long blue hair like Ludwig—apparently you've met him," he gave me a look, "Anyways she was nothing but curves and long legs; hands down Clawd was gorgeous."

"Okay," I nodded my head trying to picture her. I imagined a taller, more womanly version of Wendy with streaming azure hair. If his wife looked anything like I thought then she was drop-dead.

"Clawdia was the daughter of a wealthy governor in the Firelands and King Morton thought it would be best to tap into the riches of their province by marrying into a powerful family. Like most royal unions I didn't have a say in the matter but I did think she was pretty hot."

"Anyways, both her father and mine were elated we would be getting hitched. My father saw himself as being able to access that burrow's wealth with the marriage and the Firelands saw themselves as being able to have a bigger sphere of influence in the entire ruling of the Darklands."

Bowser rolled his eyes again, "_Ugh_, and once the arrangement was finalized we were married. The first day I actually met her was on the day of the wedding. I was scared out of my shell; could you blame me though? I was getting hitched so damn young."

I looked up, "How old were you when you married?"

Bowser smirked, leaning in closer, "The answer to that question will come with a price hot stuff, so what will you give me?"

I stared at him wide-eyed and not having a clue what to say; having the Koopa king inches away and grinning with a smile promising nothing but trouble, I wisely retracted, "Uh…nevermind."

He huffed, eyes closed and grinning smugly, "That's what I thought. So like I was saying, I met Clawd the day I married her. At the time I didn't mind because she was blistering hot but I didn't realize she was _such_ a man eater until it was too late."

"It was awkward because the first day we met, we had to…_you know_," he looked at me, grinned a bit and made what I'm sure was a lewd gesture with his fingers, "_Consummate_ the marriage. Really fancy-smancy way of saying sex."

My face flushed; I couldn't possibly imagine meeting someone for the first time and being expected to do something so intimate. Also why was Bowser staring at me so hard? Geesh, talk about making things far more awkward then they had to be.

Bowser chuckled as he studied my expression, "Well that night I _certainly _didn't mind her. She was good at what she did." Then he snorted derisively, "Virgin princess my green scaly _ass_. Clawd knew how to _bong _the ole_schlong_ if you know what I mean..."

I blushed furiously, "_Bowser_!"

"But moments when we were forced to get to know really each other—like outside of sex—that's when things went downhill. We both were strong-willed, stubborn, selfish though she was hard to get along with, I wanted to get to know the woman I was bang—er—_loving_ every night. But all she wanted was to be glamorous, she had to be seen wherever we went and loved to be envied."

I shot a dark look at his crude wording. I may have been a tomboy but still referring to something as sacred as what you do with a spouse as _banging_; ugh. As far as I'm concerned, when I'm married—I can't believe there'll be a day when I'll be wed—no one will be '_banging_' me damn it.

It will be special, sweet and all those other sappy things chick flicks and romance novels promised.

"Our marriage contract said she needed to produce heirs and that she did. The best thing that came out of our marriage—if you could call it that—were my kids. And since I'm such a freakin' _studmuffin_, we didn't have just one heir but eight."

He leaned back, smiling, "I know I may be hard on those little nematodes but that's 'cause I know one day they'll all be great."

His expression hardened, "I tried my damnedest to make Clawd happy. We were married knowing absolutely nothing about each other but I tried to make things work, if not for me but for the kids."

His gaze was unfocused, "I…I bought her everything she wanted, made sure she had maids waiting on her hand and foot; I wanted her happy. But nothing ever seemed to work, nothing was ever good enough for her. If I bought her a ring, she'd want five, buy a fifty thousand coin dress and then she'd want a one hundred thousand coin dress…"

His fists clenched as his eyes narrowed, "I could handle living with a woman who didn't love me…But I couldn't deal with finding out _my_ queen was having multiple affairs. I had our marriage certificate burned right then and our marriage annulled. I also ordered her out of my sight."

He lowered his head until I couldn't see his expression, "She left when Junior was barely a year old and never came back. Sometimes I have to wonder if she…If she ever cared for anyone but herself. How can someone, a mother leave an infant behind and never come back?"

"I see…" This wasn't my place to give an opinion, just to hear him out.

Bowser glowered into the dark night sky, "Our marriage was fu—um, doomed to fail. I had hoped…Clawd and I could learn to love each other through the arranged marriage. But how could we? Clawdia seemed to only care about coin and wealth. Stars, Ludwig to this day remembers every single fight we had."

He was forced into a doomed marriage, a marriage that was toxic for both parties. For the sake of Sarasaland's future would Father strand me in a hapless marriage? If it ever came down to it, whose future would he sacrifice? Mine or the kingdom?

"After awhile the awesome sex became dull…I knew things were going _really_ bad when we stopped breaking headboards and bedframes," Bowser sighed, shaking his head with melancholy.

I turned my head to gape at him dumbly; I'm not quite sure I'm anywhere _near _mature enough to have heard that…

Bowser grinned and clamped his hands around my shoulders, "Well, I think we've got enough of this serious business out of the way, so now you get to tell me about your suitor business."

Crap, I forgot about that. I swallowed uncomfortably as I began, "Uh…well..."

And he seemed to enjoy my discomfort, "Yes?"

"I've got one last quick question. What does that _feosaura_ word mean anyways? I know it's an insult to humans but—"

Bowser's growing growl cut me off, "I thought I said I never wanted to hear you say that word again."

"Come on what does it—"

"I'm _not_ telling you."

"Oh come on!"

He growled, glaring as smoke wafted from his mouth ominously. The back of his jaw glowed a foreboding shade of red. If I wasn't used to being around him, I'd probably be scared.

"…So moving on!" I laughed, "Father told me within two weeks' time I'm going to have to start rubbing elbows with a couple of my suitors."

I was taken back when Bowser unleashed a nasty snarl, "_What_? Is Daddy Sakuro in such a hurry to marry his only daughter off?! And here I was actually starting to _like_ the guy!"

I sighed, "Father and the council will get to choose three candidates and I'll choose the other four."

"Yeah?" Bowser suddenly straightened up, "And just who are you thinking of spending time with?"

I bit my lip in thought, "I've been thinking of Lulu, Ryu, and of course I have to squeeze the King of Koopas in."

Bowser chuckled, "You better believe I'm on that list. Who knows? Maybe I'll even sweep you off your feet."

"But that leaves me one more choice," I sighed, shaking my head, "I really don't want to pick another guy. Everyone else was just kind of _weird._ I can only recall King Boo because he was _super _creepy."

"King Boo went to your Soo-dooni?" Bowser grinned rather largely, "You mean Ichabod?"

"Wait? Who?" I looked at him stunned; he was the first person who actually sounded _fond _of King Boo.

"Uh nothing," Bowser smirked knowingly, like the cat in cream, "We're friends, raised some hell together back in the day and I can't hate a man—er ghost—who managed to stick the mustached loser into a painting. Not much for brawn but his mind-games are vicious."

I shook my head, "Somehow you _would _like him. I think he secretly wants to kill me…"

"Nah, he's eccentric but harmless," Bowser chuckled, "Once you get passed how he's mentally stuck in the Renaissance era or something, he's pretty wild."

_Mentally stuck in a time era? And I'm supposed to be okay with that_?_ Any guy who likes King Boo can't be all that sane. Hmm, this just may very well be the proof I need to know Bowser is completely nutso._

"Right," I stared at him, wondering if he had mental issues.

Bowser chuckled. Our knees touched and it didn't seem to bother me at all. In fact just being near Bowser was like being next to a furnace. Maybe it was because he breathed fire. I glanced at him and smiled, "So any advice when it comes to choosing a suitor?"

"Yeah," he huffed, "Don't choose a bozo. Crazies may not be that bad, but a bozo? No."

I laughed as he grinned impishly, "Choose a guy who'll love you when you aren't cute, like when you're sick or sad. But then again I don't know if it's possible for you not to look cute."

I grinned, shaking my head, "I never thought I'd say this but King Bowser you're way too kind. Of course I can look terrible. You'd have to see me the first thing when I wake up. I'm a real fright then."

"Hmm, I bet that would be a sight to see," he sighed, "Hair tussled, eyes bleary but still aqua-blue and shiny…What do you sleep in anyways?"

I laughed, "That's kind of a personal question! I usually wear flannel jammies."

" 'Jammies?'" Bowser sounded disturbed he had to say such a word, "You mean pajamas?"

"Yep."

"Ah. So...no lingerie? I was looking through this Vivian secret's magazine and saw something that would look really—"

I didn't bat an eyelash when I reached out and punched his bicep. Bowser guffawed,"Okay! Okay! Sheesh!"

"And what does King Bowser sleep in?" I laughed, "In fire? In burning ash and cinder?"

"No," Bowser grinned, watching my reaction, "Just in the nude."

Choking, I blushed as he laughed, "I did _not_ need to know that!"

I pondered back to earlier when I awoke him. I stared wide-eyed; gosh he wasn't…he couldn't have been naked right?! I gaped in abject horror.

"Whoa! _Whoa!_ I can see exactly where you're about to go with this," Bowser chuckled, "And no I was just kidding. I wear boxers to bed, nice black silky boxers like today."

Bowser smirked devilishly, reaching towards the part of his shell where his leg extruded. He revealed black fabric. It had a slight sheen and I tilted my head trying to figure out what it was.

Oh.

Ohhhh.

_OH My STARS!_

He laughed as my face glowed red. I teetered, nearly falling over and Bowser's laughter only grew more vibrant and stronger. My face was so hot, I thought I'd pass out from being so embarrassed.

"W-W-What are you doing y-you idiot!?" I shrieked, voice shrill and cheeks burning.

He doubled over, pounding his fist against the roof tops as he howled. I turned away, hoping he wouldn't notice my blush, "_B-Bowser!_? D-Do you even know what modesty _is?_!"

He was still laughing, "You blushed as red as a hairy goomba virgin! You're so damn innocent it's friggin' cute!"

I huffed, teeth gritted and cheeks inflamed, "W-What a shameless jerk you are..."

"Just givin' ya some fuel for the ole imagination."

"Do me a favor and don't."

He grinned, "Still blushing huh?"

"W-Will you shut up already!?"

"Fine," he still was smiling, "Just keep in mind that there are thousands of Koopa women who would kill to experience what you just did."

At this I busted out laughing, "_Experience? _You are _so_ ridiculous!"

We sat in comfortable silence, watching as the sky blackened and twinkled with shimmering stars. The red lava pools glowed in a memorizing radiance across the black scenery. Even though the sun had long went down, it was still warm.

"Hmm, it's getting late," Bowser muttered beside me, "Time to head back in shall we?"

"Sure, uh…hey Bowser?"

He smirked, "Uh…hey Flower?"

"I really enjoy talking with you," I beamed at him, "Thanks for being a friend."

Bowser's ruby eyes glowed. He didn't smile but his carmine eyes gleamed with mirth. Perhaps if he didn't have such a sinister father then maybe when he was happy he would smile.

He cradled me in his arms and smirked, "Well I like talking with you too Flower, even more than I like looking at you and that says _a lot_. Now let's go."

"Ugh, I can walk you know!" I hissed, glaring up at him.

"Yep," he smirked, "And yet I'm going to carry you, so sit tight."

He carried me effortlessly through the castle and instead of bringing us to the dining room, I was surprised when he took the elevator. We were soon marching through the red double-doors and into his personal bedchambers. He set me upon his bed and with two snaps of his fingers, a servant all but leapt into the room.

"How are the twins and Junior?" He asked.

"Your Lordship, Lady Kammy has put Prince Bowser Junior to bed for the night and the twins are walking back to their chambers for the night as we speak."

"Good. Is there anything to eat in the kitchen?"

"Absolutely you Nastiness, we'll have a fine meal prepared for both you and the princess stat!"

And with a bow, the paraKoopa flew out of the room. This was my third time in Bowser's luxurious room and I took the time to survey my surroundings. I recognized the red comforter and matching drapery and various plush-looking loveseats. I didn't realize how many pictures of himself he had around the room. As Bowser was busy barking orders to his staff, I took my time studying his pictures.

The drawings and paintings of Bowser came in many different styles from cartoonish all the way to abstract shapes and angles that came together to create his image. I stopped at one of the pictures and smiled; it was the caricature we had drawn at Junior's family day. It was placed in a beautiful frame as if it were some sort of expensive, gorgeous artwork.

In fact I even noticed this picture was placed in the middle of all of his photos as if it were meant to be the centerpiece. Just as I took a step closer to study our cartoonish selves, my foot brushed against something. I looked down to see a thick book.

It was turquoise-blue and its cover looked to be made of the same material as a quilt. When I bent down to pick it up, it was far heavier than I imagined it to be! Stars, just what in the world was in here? Just as I began to flip the pages open, a looming shadow blocked my light.

"Whatcha lookin' at Flower? My wall of excellence? Don't all these pictures make you appreciate how drop dead sexy I am?"

He was looking down at me, grinning in his usual manner where it looked as if his smile was full of malice and cruelty. I can only assume with an awful father like his, that was perhaps the only way he was brought up to smile; looking as if he were planning your assassination.

"So tell me, which of these is a favorite of yours truly?" he looked too smug, "I think this one makes me look awesome, see how the light just _rolls _tantalizingly off my biceps? Now why don't you—?"

He trailed off the moment his red eyes took me in. I blinked, realizing he was looking at the book I was holding. Bowser's face went pale before it suddenly flushed a dark cherry. Before I could ask him what his weird reaction was about, the book was ripped away from my hands, "_GIMME THAT_!"

He held the book against his chest tightly, cradling it as if his life depended upon it, "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!"

I was stunned, "…Huh?"

"Don't you Sarasalandians have manners or something!" he snarled, smoke wafting from his nostrils and yet his cheeks were still a bit flushed, "I-I don't go snooping through _your_ things in _your_ room!" Then a whisper, "I've always wanted to…But guess what! I HAVEN'T!"

It was humorous at how worked up he was! Every now and then his left eye would twitch, and even his tail was thumping erratically against the floor. Laughing a bit, I raised my hands defensively, "Hey, I'm sorry! Calm down big guy, I didn't know that book meant so much to you."

He growled softly as I laughed a bit more, "So…you didn't look in it did you?"

As he asked me this, I noticed his eyes strayed away from mine. I blinked; okay now I kind of wish I had looked through it. Was it a diary or something?

"No I didn't. I just picked it up the second you came over, scout's promise."

"Good, you better not have," even though he was growling his words, I could see the relief on his face, "And that scout's honor thing only works if you're a scout."

"Whatever Mr. Secret Koopa," I huffed, smirking.

"That's _King_ Mr. Secret Koopa to you!"

We both grinned at each other stupidly. There was a ringing from within the room and I nearly jumped out of my skin at the sound. Bowser stomped over to the small device and pressed a button with his massive finger, "What?"

"_Sire dinner's at your door. We simply await you, your kingship_," a voice chimed pleasantly.

Bowser smirked, "Splendid! Come on in. I'm starved and I'm sure the Princess of Sarasaland is too. I hope you brought the lava wine, we've got to show this princess what they're missing in Sarasaland."

"_But of course sire_."

Within seconds dinner and dessert were delivered on several carts and soon we were both chowing down on grilled steaks and fresh vegetables. We clanked goblets—Bowser's was huge!—and I even intertwined my arms in his just like Rawk Hawk did. I was surprised at how much Bowser liked the gesture.

The dessert was a Koopa crème cheesecake that was to die for! Its consistency was creamy and smooth and I nearly salivated with each bite I took. Full and content, we arm-wrestled several more times, all with Bowser winning. By the end of our goes he was grinning hellishly as I was fuming, red-faced but I still had fun.

Sort of.

By the time it was nearly twelve in the morning, Bowser walked me back to my room. Yet again he tried to carry me back but I promised I'd puke on him if he tried. Was that classy? No not at all, but it did get Bowser to keep his hands to himself.

And the look of horror on his face was hilarious. We stopped at my silvery doors and Bowser beamed down at me, "Well I hope you'll have sweet dreams Flower."

"You too, Bowwy."

Knowing he was going to fume at his nickname, I turned and slowly started for the room. I laughed as Bowser snarled at his nickname but what I didn't expect was for him to scoop me up in his arms. He spun me around and I could see his eyes were narrowed, "You've been calling me that _stupid_ nickname so much I'm _starting_ to get used to it."

"Then mission accomplished," I grinned.

"You're going to pay for that," Bowser suddenly grinned, "I'll happily forgive you if you pay the toll."

"And that would be?"

"A good night smooch," he purred, sharp teeth glinting in a smile as he pulled me closer against his carapace.

I felt my cheeks flush under his intense gaze as he slowly licked his lips. I felt nervous when I realized he was _waiting_. Oh my Stars he was _serious_ about kissing me! I'm pretty sure I glowed an even darker cherry-red as I shyly looked away from him. Even though I wasn't directly looking at him, it was more than obvious his grin had sharpened.

"I…I don't t-think that would be," I choked and stumbled over my words, "We…We s-shouldn't…"

Yet again I was surprised by how soft his normally intense eyes were. He cradled me even more gently in his arms and I both felt and heard a deep purring reverberating through his carapace.

"Come on, you can trust me," his rumbling voice was surprisingly soft for the king of Koopas, "It's just me."

'It's just me' he claimed, as if he wasn't an intimidating, eight foot tall merciless king. I looked into his eyes, trying to find any traces of the bloody-thirsty, power lusting fiend everyone seemed to label him as. He was the only creature, the only beast who could challenge Mario's valor with his unparalleled strength.

And yet the only thing I could find were the bright, safe eyes of my best friend. They were the eyes of someone who had weathered much adversity in his years; there was a definite edge, a certain ferocity there but at the same time there was a blanket of warmth, of strength in those intense carmine eyes of his.

My Stars, his eyes were kind of…

_Beautiful_

At my earnest thought, my cheeks grew hotter and he must have seen something in my face because Bowser's eyes softened; he even started to purr. He requested a kiss again, this time in a soft, velvety deep bass. I squeaked unintelligibly, temperature broiling before I nodded slowly, "O-Okay. I trust you."

Bowser grinned victoriously and even growled a bit before he slowly brought me closer to him. His head lowered as his eyes slipped closed and soon I felt my mouth pressed against his. His arms tightened their hold as I wrapped both of my arms around his neck to deepen the kiss. By now his purring was loud, but I thought the noise was adorable.

For a rumored beastly king, his mouth was so soft and gentle. I barely felt his warm lips press against mine sweetly. Each kiss he planted upon my lips was softer than the previous and it made my heart flutter.

After several seconds Bowser slowly removed his mouth from mine and we both opened our eyes and looked at one another. I bet I was probably flushed from our exchange as Bowser grinned down at me largely. The king Koopa gave me one last mischievous smile before he eagerly showered quick, sloppy kisses all over my face.

I laughed, tickled when he even managed to fit his snout into the crevice between my neck and shoulder. He pulled away and I found myself placed gently back on my feet.

"You have sweet dreams Flower," Bowser purred, his dark red eyes glowed softly.

Still giddy from being tickled I beamed dopily at him, "You sleep well too Bowser."

I stood at my door as I watched him stomp away. The second he disappeared around the bend at the end of the hallway, I slipped back into my room. I grinned hugely; my heart was racing, pounding furiously against my torso and yet I was thrilled to have been in his arms, kissing him.

Hmm, maybe I was imagining things but his eyes seemed like they were three or four shades darker after the kiss; like a burgundy almost. Maybe I was just seeing things…

* * *

><p>Bowser slowly closed the large brick-red doors to his luxurious suite and once he was sure his subjects weren't in range of seeing him, he performed a victory dance. What did those humans call it? The running man?<p>

He grinned hellishly; Princess Daisy had kissed him for the second time! _A second time_! As Bowser stomped towards his furnished bathroom, his mind still replayed everything out for him. He could remember holding her in his arms and how petite she was. She was tiny! Even by human standards but she was so warm and soft.

And let's not forget that she smelled _so good_. The scent of her hair alone was enough to drive him crazy and when he held her soft body against his he was surprised he hadn't moaned out loud. Truth be told the King of Koopas had been nervous as hell when he asked for the kiss.

Stars it took every single ounce of self-control he had to stop the kiss and keep it innocent. When he pulled away from her soft lips, his testosterone was raging, pulsing with heat and desire. Why, he had half a mind to show her what a _real _kiss felt like and then finish the ride in his own personal chambers.

Bowser glared at his reflection; keep your head on straight king, Flower wasn't anywhere near ready for any of that. She was too innocent and would probably be scared if she knew how he felt about her. But why would a single kiss from Flower make him feel so…

So…

Randy?

That kiss didn't even have any tongue in it and yet he felt _turned on. _But why though? It wasn't like he himself was innocent, if anything far from it. He had _years_ of XXX rated experience and ridiculously hot times with Clawdia—those bedframes didn't break themselves—so why would a simple, three-second virgin kiss make him feel so hot and bothered?

It just didn't make any damn sense.

Also, why would someone as pretty—no—as amazingly gorgeous as her want to kiss _him_? He was the notorious demon king, a beast with a scaly hide, towering form, sharp fangs, claws and hideous features. Bowser wasn't even pretending to be ignorant; at her _Sumanni_ thing he had watched the way all those bachelors had stared after her with adoration and to his vexation with a little bit of lust too.

That night had tested every single last drop of patience the king had. It took all his will and determination not to rip out those intrusive eyes of those humans eying his Flower. Okay enough about those losers and back to the kiss!

Daisy had blushed prettily in a way he loved and smiled sweetly; he'd _kill _to see that smile again. As Bowser removed his shell, he sighed happily; his lips still tingled from where her soft, petal pink lips had touched his.

After the king had finished his bathroom business, he stepped towards the thick book that had caused him a lot of grief today. Bowser took his prized possession to his ostentatious bed and crawled in. Once he was wrapped up in his ruby-red sheets, he slowly flipped open his book.

His eyes glowed at the sight of his precious collectings, his treasures. The book wasn't a diary as Daisy had surmised but instead a photo album. And what was in the photo album? Pictures of course but of who?

A sinful grin crawled across the face of the king at the multitude of pictures of the Sarasalandian princess. Right now he was glimpsing at his titled 'Golf hottie' segment when Daisy played golf in the most recent Toadstool tour tournament.

But back during the Toadstool tour Bowser hadn't been quite infatuated with her yet. No, it was at the Mario tennis tournament were she really caught his eye. Although Bowser wasn't love-struck yet, he did recall during the golf tournament Daisy had been one of the three finalists.

It came as no surprise he would have to face off against Mario—because that pesky midget plumber _always_ interfered somehow with his plans! Always! But he was a bit surprised to see the last finalist was a petite, tiny cherry-haired girl who was even smaller than Peach and was swathed in sporty sunshine yellow clothes. Bowser didn't even know a second princess existed until he saw the crown glinting upon her head.

Yet again Bowser was startled when the unheard of princess took her swing and all but_ blasted_ the hell out of the ball at a range near 300 yards! Her swing was worthy enough of a Koopa! She may have taken third in that tournament, but in the back of his mind she had earned his respect. Ever since then he decided to storm into the tennis tournament.

While he had pretended he was there for Peach, he had watched the dark-haired princess in secret. When she played her matches, she was tough. She had made several plays Bowser thought she surely couldn't get and when she served the ball she _brought it_.

The princess was vicious, snarling with each shot she blasted at her opponent and taunted them mercilessly. However when the game was over, the princess was all smiles and perfectly sweet. Even if she lost she was a good sport and shook hands with her opponent.

After Bowser had watched her in the tennis tournaments, he had decided he wanted to get to know her. After each match she was sweaty, hair messy and frizzled but she couldn't have looked any more attractive.

Peach may have been busy trying to look pretty when she played sports but this girl wasn't. Somehow she could do that without all that makeup and frilly business. Bowser could even recall when he had made himself known to her for their first meeting. As Peach and Daisy where traveling together to the snackbar for refreshments, he had appeared out of nowhere.

He had performed well, laughing insidiously and even licking his maw at the sight of Peach. At his sudden appearance Peach went pale and trembled like a leaf in a breeze, but Bowser was more interested in the new girl's reaction.

The unknown princess didn't squeal or shriek girlishly, she simply stared him down with her arms akimbo. Besides Mario, _no one_ had ever given him a look like that before. Ever since then Bowser knew he had fallen head over heels for the sparkly, fiery princess of Sarasaland. That same zeal, the same intensity of his princess was captured in all of his beloved photos.

The king Koopa felt his face go warm at the sight of his beloved _aficionada_ covered in sweat, looking fierce in the bright sunlight as she sent a shot back at her foe. Gosh these pictures of Daisy were way better than the awesome up-skirt photos of Peach he used to have his oh-so-awesome photographer get, and that's saying a lot.

What? It wasn't like he was a perv or anything! King Bowser just simply…appreciated the _finer_ things in life thank you very much. And let's not even pretend if Mario had the chance, he wouldn't be all over those photos! Mario may act like a goody two shoes but it was obvious he was crazy over miss pretty in pink.

Yeah, Peach was pretty and looked good in her short sports skirt but he still referred Daisy as she was: sweaty, hair matted, and brown skin glistening with sweat. Bowser smirked at that thought; _Hell yeah_.

But then that always made Bowser wonder; _why_ oh why couldn't Daisy ever wear any skirts when she played sports! He could just imagine seeing even more of those long, bronze legs of hers and admiring the feminine fluttering of her yellow dress as she floated around the court effortlessly…

That thought nearly had the King of Koopas drooling; Stars what he wouldn't _give _to have an up-skirt shot of Princess Daisy. Bowser blinked, snapping back to reality as he felt drool starting to dribble down the side of his face. He wiped at his face impatiently before he took another look into his photo album.

The final tennis picture he had was his favorite by far. Everything about the photo was perfect. It was a shot of her smiling in the post victory air. Paying off that photographer for these exclusive, one of a kind photos of his Flower was completely and utterly worth every coin he had spent!

With one hand on her hip and the other resting the racquet on her shoulder, she was beaming. The sun set her bronze skin aglow and her tussled hair afire in a myriad of browns and reds. And her blue eyes sparkled with an ethereal brilliance. Bowser longingly stared at the woman in the photo as he softly ran a claw over her face.

_What I wouldn't give to have a woman like that…_

Maybe one day she'd be able to look past his devil-like appearance; his burning red eyes, his wild mane of hair, even his pearly horns and sharp claws and fangs. Maybe she'd see past the devil and see that his heart was utterly and completely devoted to her. What he wouldn't give to have her smile at him that way.

_Yeah, like she'd ever look at you that way. She's going to always think of you as a monster._

Bowser closed his eyes, shut the book and snarled; who was he kidding? Why would she ever want him? He felt his heart lurch at the cold thought. He threw the book to the floor and snapped his fingers twice. The King of Koopas was doused in the utter darkness of night as he wrapped himself in his blankets.

Was it even possible she could look at him as a potential suitor? She had all those handsome humans to choose from. Giving into sleep's desire, the Koopa king felt his conscience ebbing away. His thoughts swarmed around his princess and before he gave in completely to sleep.

_Sleep well Princess, maybe one day you'll dream of me too._

* * *

><p>Alice: Haha, we had some serious anecdotes with Bowser and it seems they've resolved their problems. Well, at least some of them anyways. XP And Bowser's eyes were burgundy? Wonder what that means? O_O ^_^ Hope you enjoyed and drop a review! Stay tuned for the next episode coming soon! :)<p> 


	16. Volcano: The Job interview?

Alice: (Serious voice) So…Last chapter we received over 20+ reviews…I can't breathe…or I can…but it's hard to XD

Ultrra: You remember when this story first started and you were worried no one would read it?

Alice: Heh I remember those days…

_(Eleven months ago…Somewhere in a quiet, California suburb)_

_Alice: (crying dramatically) AHHHHHHHHHHH OMG! I must be insane to write such an unknown pairing! (jumps out a window sobbing)_

Ultrra: (Unimpressed)…That was a bit much wasn't it?

Alice: (Sweat drop) Umm…I guess ^_^;

Ultrra: (sighs) Well if it makes you feel better, lots of readers actually stick around and read your foolishness! ^_^

Alice: Foolishness?

Ultrra: Your Author notes Ally.

Alice: Oh. Oh! Yeah! ^_^ Which reminds me, we'll meet more koopalings in this one! Yay! Lol! I hope everyone has a happy 4th! (salutes) Read and enjoy the chapter! :3

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>"Alright, you've got a pretty wicked serve princess," My tennis instructor, a girl my age with dark brown, bordering black hair and striking hazel eyes smiled warmly at me, "I think that's good for today. Next Thursday we'll work on your backhand serve."<p>

"Alright, thanks Plum!"

And with one last enthusiastic wave, I padded to the palace. I finished up today's tennis lesson and was summoned to see Father immediately in his personal office. I was _not _going to see Father as a stinky, sweaty mass so I took a quick shower and pulled on my customary golden gown before heading over.

By the time I reached the oak door of Father's office, my hair was damp and drying in frizzy ringlets. My hair—let alone appearance—had always been an issue of contention with the elders but I didn't care; it was clean and the pleasing apple shampoo lingered like a fragrance.

I raised my fist to wrap on the door when a soft laugh diffused through the door. I peered around the slightly askew door and was surprised at what I saw. The slender, elegant form of Lady Angora was standing before father. From my angle I could only see her back; her ebony hair was in its usual sophisticated up-swept bun and I could recognize her extravagant dresses anywhere.

"—truly appreciate the hand you've played in raising my daughter," that was Father, "telling you I am ever grateful never seems to be enough."

"Your lordship, the gratitude of Sarasaland's great Emperor is enough for me," was that Lady Angora? I've never heard such warmth in her voice.

Then Father laughed smoothly, "Come now Angora, such informality amongst old friends is quite tiring, don't you think?"

_Excuse me? Old friends? Since when had these two been 'old friends?'_

"Very well then Sakuro," I moved a bit closer to read her expression. Now I could see the cordiality flood Lady Angora's pale face. You know, when she wasn't sneering and judging, she was quite pretty, beautiful even, "But I will only address you as such when it is proper."

She leaned forward and reached a dainty hand to Father's shoulder, "It is a pleasure of mine to help with your daughter. It is the least I could do for you. Running a kingdom is busy and I know how much you cherish your bond with your daughter. If only life came with a manual, then maybe we could juggle our lives better hmm?"

"Indeed."

Then, the gears and wheels turning in my head clicked as I studied this scene a bit harder: Father was looking up at my caretaker calmly whereas Lady Angora had a bright warmth in her eyes. I think her cheeks were even pleasantly flushed.

My Stars, I _must _be imagining what I think I'm seeing.

Then from somewhere behind, a voice whispered into my ear, "What _do_ you think you're seeing?"

Remember, I _hate _being startled.

I began screaming bloody murder, flailing my arms as I all but leapt through Father's officer doors. Father and Lady Angora visibly jumped—Lady Angora even almost fell over—as I fell to the floor gracelessly. For a moment everyone was silent; Father stared blankly at me and Angora looked furious. Then there was laughter.

The person who had surprised me was my dear Grammy and yes, she was _laughing._

"W-What is the meaning of this?" Lady Angora snapped, unusually flustered for some reason.

"In her usual fashion, it seems the princess has finally arrived," Father stated simply, "With a bit of her own personal flare and grace."

I flushed at the hidden insult and Father arched an amused eyebrow; touché then…

Glaring, I turned to look at Grammy, who was laughing unreservedly, "Sorry _Pichi, _but I didn't know you would be so jumpy my dear."

"Grammy! You snuck up behind me and whispered in my ear like a _creeper_!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands in the air, "Of course I'm going to jump higher than Super Mario!"

"Very well, Lady Angora would you excuse us for a moment? I would like to speak with the princess for a few minutes."

"Of course your Lordship," with a curtsy, Lady Angora excused herself and left with a surly expression.

I stared after her wordlessly before Father motioned for us to approach. I helped Grammy into the nearest chair and held her hand. Father was jotting down notes with an expensive quill and looked up, "And how has your afternoon been, _Chisana?"_

"It's been well Father," I smiled at him then shared a second with Grammy, "I finished tennis lessons and practiced threading."

Father rested his elbows on the desk, neatly interlocking his fingers together. Rays of light spilt upon Father's figure, making his already elegant visage glow ethereally; his crystal blue eyes looked neon and his skin shone like the surface of the moon. His long ebony hair glowed with an undertone of midnight blue; like how did he _do_ that? How was his hair so beautiful and _shiny!_?

I'm his daughter and my hair looks _nothing _like that. Men shouldn't have nicer hair than women! This is so unfair! Women would probably murder him for his locks!

"Before your travels to the Darklands tomorrow," Father's deep voice brought me back to attention, "I wanted to inform you how the council and I have been talking about your future."

"Future?" I blinked, a bit surprised, "May I ask pertaining to what specifically?"

Father titled his head and narrowed his eyes just the slightest bit, "Courtship with your potential suitors."

_Aw sheyt…_

I stopped smiling and didn't realize I began to squeeze Grammy's hand. I felt a bit better when she squeezed my hand back a bit harder, quietly supporting me; Stars its barely been a month since my _Summani _and already the council was talking suitor business. And anyone with half a mind knew that along with suitors came marriage not too far behind.

_Oy._

I chewed my lip; was I really ready for this? Father's cool expression was its usual mask of equanimity as he continued, "The council and I have reviewed hundreds of interested suitors and as of today, we've selected twenty potentials."

"Twenty?" I gaped, "W-What am I going to do with twenty men?"

Grammy laughed softly as Father looked noticeably provoked, "_Chisana, _rest assured we shall truncate that number during the subsequent week. By the end of the process we will have ten men and we shall select the top six."

I looked away, and my voice came out feather-soft, "This is all so soon…"

Grammy's face grew sympathetic, "_Pichi…_"

I found myself with a great deal of anger coursing through my veins as I turned on Father. I clenched shaking fists as I spat out, "Whose idea was this? To try to marry me as soon as possible?"

His expression softened, "_Chisana..."_

I laughed darkly, "Is the council really so eager to marry me off? To have me pop out a few heirs? Why wait for marriage at all then?" I snapped, "Why not find the wealthiest man in Sarasaland, throw us in bed and have him _do _me. Because only his status and wealth are going to matter!"

"_Daisy_." I halted at the sound of Father's voice and knew immediately I had messed up; while his voice wasn't raised, he managed to sound utterly menacingly, "I will _never_ hear such vulgarity from my own child again. Is that understood?"

My voice was barely a whisper as my cheeks burned, "Yes Father…I'm sorry but I'm just so overwhelmed."

"That is completely understandable my dear," Grammy replied, patting my hand softly, "This is all so very new for you but it will become better in due time. I promise it will. We will find a good man for you."

"I—I don't think I'm ready for all this," I blurted out, nerves rising. I didn't realize when I crossed over into fluent Sarasalandian, "_My_ _Summani just happened a month ago and now the council wants me to meet suitors…I'm not ready for this…I-I don't want to marry!_"

The kind, bright blue eyes of Grammy shone with warmth as she squeezed my hand tightly. However Father didn't seem quite as understanding as his face grew austere; an artic edge sharpened his impeccable features, "You are twenty three years old and unwed. It should be noted how most royal women are wed when they come of childbearing age. Perhaps I've been too…delicate about this matter."

Childbearing age? That would have been when I was…fourteen? Would they really have wanted me married so…young?

"Sakuro..._Basta terre. _That's enough," Grammy had an edge of warning to her voice.

"You were born as the Princess of Sarasaland and have an obligation to the crown to uphold. Your mother was married at eighteen, your cousin's mother at seventeen and your grandmother at fifteen; if you are not wed soon, then suitors will wonder if something is amiss."

I stood in stark silence, too stunned to say something; Grammy was married at fifteen? When I was fifteen I don't think I even had my first kiss. But even worse; a female monarch had to be married by a certain age while men could be fifty and pawed over by women.

As I looked at Father, I tried to ignore the sting of hot tears clouding my vision. I sniffled, wiping at my nose as my bottom lip trembled; _stupid tears_. Y_ou are Princess Sarasaland, stop crying like a little girl!_

Father slowly rose from his seat and walked over. He placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently, "You are young and beautiful, Princess Sarasaland and it is now that your most promising suitors shall reveal their interest and we must capitalize on that. While it may sound unfair to consider marriage in the spring of your youth, you will thank your father one day."

I wiped angrily at my cheeks, betrayed that my tears were leaking against my will. Father sighed softly, "The council has been wanting for you to have been married by the age of sixteen or by childbearing age, however as your father…I could not allow that. _Chisana_ while you do not realize it, I have fought tooth and nail for you. Do not think of me as your enemy."

Father lightly held my chin and stared at me, "I would _not _allow my _Chisana_ to be married until I felt you would be mature. The best I could give was twenty three years but I feel you are now more than capable of dealing with marriage."

I closed my eyes when Father pressed a soft kiss to my temple, "You are strong and even as a child you've always been. Enjoy your weekend in the Darklands."

I heard receding footsteps and then Father was gone. While I stared at the space Father once occupied, Grammy wrapped me into a tight hug. She cooed softly, resting my head against her sternum as I sought her grandmotherly comfort. I don't know what it was about her: the soft scent of her perfume, the way her pearl necklace felt cool against my skin but it had me bawling like a child again.

"Everything's going to be fine my little Starlight," Grandmother soothed over my sobbing, softly rubbing my back, "Don't cry, your Grammy's here. Today I'm going to clear both of our schedules and we're going to have a fun girls' day. How does that sound? I'll make your favorite dessert. Flaming Cherry Cheesecake sounds good right now, doesn't it?"

* * *

><p>The following day I couldn't have been happier to leave town as I grabbed Firefly, my luggage and took the carriage to the Darklands. My carriage driver, who had once been all but fearful of the Darklanders, was smiling and waving to the Bowser's Keep staff. Once my carriage touched down, I saw Kammy waiting in her usual spot.<p>

Toss opened the carriage door and bowed to me as I stepped out before turning to a parakoopa and asking about his family. With Firefly in hand, I approached Kammy, "Good evening Kammy."

"Evening to you Princess," she inclined her head and even smiled a bit; is it possible she is warming up to me, "Shall we be on our way? And how is Firefly today?"

Firefly howled happily, even wiggling his stem and leaves in a dance. Kammy laughed lightly, "Despite the good humor, I'm sure you two are both famished. Let us get going, his lordship wishes to see you immediately."

I arched an eyebrow, "Immediately huh? Wow, I wonder what all the hubbub is about. Are we going somewhere?"

"No, his lordship wants to see you in his personal office."

That made me laugh, "Bowser has an _office? _Why won't he see me in the throne room? All delegates meet in the throne room!"

Kammy fixed her spectacles, "I myself am unsure of his motives, princess. But it must be quite personal if he's summoning you to the office. And _yes_ Lord Bowser has an office."

On our way to the king's personal office, I tried to convince Kammy how a giant, eight-foot tall Koopa sitting behind an office cubicle would be funny. Imagine Bowser wearing a suit, tie and sitting behind a tiny desk. Hilarious right? But of course she didn't find it funny or even mildly amusing at all. Hmph, Kamek would have thought it was at least amusing.

Sigh, my genius was wasted again.

Kamek suddenly materialized from out of thin air before us. He turned to Kammy, "Have you retrieved the princess yet?"

Kammy stared at Kamek as if he were stupid, "She is _beside _me. You're blind as a bat already, how much stronger prescriptions do you need?"

I laughed as Kamek sheepishly turned to look at me, "Oh, uh hello there princess."

"Hey Kamek, what did you need me for so urgently?"

"His lordship is begging to see you," Kamek replied, "He humbly requests you will help him with a matter that troubles him deeply."

I blinked back, surprised by how utterly humble and well,_ un_-Bowserly his request was. If I didn't know any better then I would have thought he was all but _pleading_ for help.

Bowser begging?

Oh I couldn't even keep the smirk off of my face if I tried.

We reached a large slate-colored double door with two sentinels standing watch. Kammy turned to a dry bones who was diligently standing watch, "Let his wickedness know his treasured guest has arrived."

"At once milady," the dry bone's voice was rough and crackled like I expected it would be. He bowed, then stepped into the office. Vaguely I could hear the sound of two people speaking then moments later the undead guard returned, "Princess, his greatness awaits you."

"Thank you." I smiled at the solider before I entered the room.

I wasn't surprised to find myself in yet another stone room furnished heavily in blood-red drapery and rugs. The usual gaudy, spiked torches lined the office as the room's source of light. I strolled towards the large desk where I saw the king of Koopas sitting.

But remember, this is Bowser so even his desk had to be obscenely badass as well. It was metallic, could double over as a hummer and was big and manly enough for him to sit behind and look imposing. I would probably look tiny and girly behind that beast of a desk.

Hmm.

With his hands interlaced, he watched as I strolled towards him. He blinked, as if he were escaping a daydream he had been present in seconds earlier. His bright red eyes nearly glowed in the darkness of the room.

"Flower, come on in," he motioned me forward.

Bowser clambered to his feet as I stood before him, "So how have you been big guy?"

"Oh fine," he said gruffly, "Doing nothing too important. Looking at documents and papers all day and wanting to blow my _brains _out since I'm so tired."

The moment I sat in my chair, I noticed he took his seat also. Mentally I shook my head; was it ridiculous an eight-foot tall Koopa king practiced human high society etiquette?

"So how's your day been?" I asked conversationally, reclining a bit.

He groaned, running an agitated hand across his face, "Ri-fricking-diculous and damn tiring. So the Darklands are made of five burrows: Fire, Ash, Smoke, Cinder, Steel. Anyways the Steelands are trying to monopolize on a specific piece of land that used to belong to the Ashlands. Steelands wants to build a new factory whereas that same land holds an ancient ancestral grave for the Ashlands. Nasty business you know? Things get ugly quick. Want a drink or somethin'?"

"Sure, how about a lemonade? And some fireflower baby formula for Firefly?"

I held up Firefly who cooed happily at the sight of Bowser. The King Koopa grinned, leaning forward to pet the baby plant, "Hey there little guy. You been protecting Flower for me?"

Firefly chirruped back happily. Bowser grinned and snapped his fingers and just outside of the door I could hear the manic scrambling of harried footsteps. Moments later a Koopa troopa returned with an iced lemonade, a large, spiked metal goblet and a tiny bottle.

"What is King Bowser having to drink this fine evening?" I chuckled as I began to feed Firefly.

"Booze," that had me laughing, "And a ton of it."

"Whoa, slow down Fiery," I admonished softly, pulling the bottle away a bit, "You can't drink that fast or you'll make yourself get sick."

Firefly chuffed in a pout, but did as instructed. I thanked the servant as I took my tall glass and Bowser was served his. As Bowser was busy chugging down his frothy drink and Firefly was starting to become sleepy, I studied my own drink. My glass was gorgeous and shaped like a fancy margarita glass. It was embellished with heart-shaped ice cubes and tiny cut fruit. Even the straw was loopy and aqua blue.

My favorite color.

Call me crazy, but somehow I know Bowser was involved in this. A normal glass of cool lemonade would have sufficed just fine, but who am I to complain at the extra effort? After a couple of large gulps from my delicious drink, I looked at the king.

He was staring at this cup intently, as if trying to burn a hole through the bottom with his eyes. I grinned, "If you want a refill, just ask for more, unless you have some magical drink-refilling powers I don't know about."

He snorted in amusement, "It's not that. I'm just…thinking is all."

"You _think?" _I laughed, "Don't hurt yourself too badly."

Grinning, I waited for his reaction.

And waited.

And waited some more.

No reaction. At all.

Okay, something's definitely wrong with him. Here I put myself on the line, telling a lame joke but got nothing for my effort! No laughter, no smirk, nothing! Not even his usual your-joke-sucked glare. Now why wasn't he being his normal, charming self?

I wonder what was worrying him so much? He seemed a bit more tense than usual; maybe he was still concerned or thinking about the struggle between the two burrows of his kingdom? _Or maybe he's thinking about the matter he wanted to speak to me about._

"So what's bothering you?" I asked, watching him carefully, "You might as well tell me what you wanted me to do for you."

"What I want _you _to do for _me_?" He smirked, although the grin didn't reach his eyes, "Well for starters you can put on a _really_ skimpy dress, blindfold me, break out the handcuffs and—"

"You _know _what I mean," I hissed, "Now spill."

The corner of Bowser's maw twitched, "Don't mess around do we? Cut right to the chase eh?"

I shrugged, "Well whatever it is, it's bothering you a lot. That much is obvious."

"Heh," he grinned as he scratched at the back of his head, "Well then Flower…I have a job for you. And like every job…you've got to pass the interview first."

I blinked, "_What? _Are you serious?_"_

He pulled out a clipboard and even had a pen; what in the name of the Stars was going on here? Was he really going to put me through a faux interview? "First question," he was grinning, "Are you good with children?"

Still confused, "I…think I am."

"Hmm," Bowser growled, still looking at his checklist, "Do you handle stress well?"

"I've been a princess my whole life, so yes I do," I chuckled.

"Use three adjectives to describe yourself."

"Uh… Funny, athletic, and…optimistic. But you know, like realistically optimistic, not that kind of 'oh yay! I'm dying but still happy' kind. That's just creepy."

Bowser continued jotting down notes, "Uh huh…Any special talents?"

I laughed, "Umm…Hmm I thought of one, but it's kind of lame."

Bowser looked excited, "What is it?"

"I can…use my tongue to do that cherry stem thing."

He suddenly stopped writing and glanced at me wide-eyed, "What did you say?"

"Umm…" the way he was suddenly gawking at me was a little unnerving, "I can…tie a cherry stem with my tongue?"

Bowser blinked slowly, before he hurriedly pressed the intercom and ordered his servants to bring a bowl of Koopa cherries. This must have been a big deal, because the servants along with more than half of the male staff appeared.

The server approached, holding a bowl of rich, dark red Koopa cherries and peered at me with awe, "The pit is already removed."

"Thanks…"

After handing me the bowl, the server stepped back to stand in line with the rest of the eager staff; Stars, you'd think I was doing something _amazing_ with the way they were watching me. I inserted the sweet fruit in my mouth, devouring the cherry then slipping the stem in.

I almost choked on the stem when I looked at Bowser; he was staring intently, as if his life depended on this. Once I was done, I grinned and slowly revealed the knotted stem to the staff. Jaws dropped, eyebrows were raised and eyes bulged.

Then there was loud uproar of male cheering and clapping. I flushed, a bit startled at such bold approval. Other servants and castle workers came up to me, whooping loudly and sounding thoroughly impressed.

"That was amazing!" One Koopa clucked, his face bright red.

"What talent!"

"Hot damn that was _hot_," Bowser breathed, looking flustered.

"C-Can I have an autograph?"

"Can you imagine the stuff she can do…?"

A soft whisper, "I bet she's an _amazing kisser..."_

When the other castle workers began to crowd around, asking for a repeat performance, Bowser seemed to snap out of his daze. He growled before vehemently ordering his workers out and even blowing a small flame after the lingering servants.

He slammed his door shut and I turned to look at him, "I don't even see why that was such a big deal. Could you explain why?"

"Uh…N-No reason. So anyways why don't you have a seat again…?"

"Sure!" Then I grinned, "Well, did I pass the 'job' interview?"

He chuckled, "With flying colors," then in a deeper, softer voice, "When we're all alone you'll have to show me that tongue trick again..."

I blinked, slowly turning to look at him, "…What did you say?"

He looked up, as if he suddenly caught his slip up, "I-I mean, I want to tell you about the favor now! Y-Yeah haha! So what I want you to do is…"

"Yes?" I was eager to know what was bothering him so much.

"I want you…to…" he coughed into his fist before he straightened up. I was a bit surprised when I saw a faint blush coating his cheeks, "Take care of my daughter."

I blinked, "Huh?"

"Well you know," again he scratched at the back of his head, purposely keeping his eyes away from mine, "I figured you're both girls and all so…"

I sat back a bit, "Wait, what _do_ you actually want me to do? Give her 'the talk'?"

"What! _No_! Oh Stars no! My Pookums is _not_ learning about _sex_!" Bowser snarled slamming two massive fists into his poor desk beneath him. He even stood up a bit and glared. A moment of silence passed between us—him glaring viciously at nothing and me staring at him skeptically—before he seemed to realize how defensive he came off as and slowly eased up.

Now even more sheepish than before, he slowly sat back down into his seat. I almost bust out laughing at the complete sense of mortification in his expression.

Why his bashfulness was almost cute.

Hmm.

"I would…appreciate it if…you took Wendy out shopping," he said slowly.

"Shopping?" I raised an eyebrow, "That's all?"

"You know," I won't say that he squirmed in his seat, but he did look uneasy, "_Girl_ shopping."

While he was _still _pointedly trying to avoid my stare, I was thinking over his offer. I blinked and then blinked again. Girl shopping? I didn't even know shopping could have a specific gender attached to it! Was there such a thing as guy shopping?

I must have been staring at him blankly—or like he was an idiot-because he elaborated, "You know…_Girl_ shopping…"

I bit my lip in thought, trying to figure out what he was too embarrassed to tell me. He was staring at me, as if pleading with me to figure out what in the world he was talking about. Girl shopping huh? Just what kind of shopping do…

_Oh!_

Then it hit me, I know what he was asking me to do. My confusion transformed into disbelief as I stared at him; so of all the people to go 'girl shopping' with, Bowser handpicks me? The biggest tomboy in Sarasaland? For a moment I thought Bowser may have been suffering brain damage; I was the most unladylike female he was probably currently in contact with.

He knew I loved to play sports, swore like a sailor, and practiced very poor etiquette. But then when I really thought about it, I could see why he'd ask me. I was a trusted friend of his and reasonably young enough that I could understand his blossoming daughter's wants and needs.

The image of the Koopa king taking his daughter 'girl shopping' was hilarious. I could only imagine his obvious discomfort as Wendy dragged him through aisle after aisle full of girlie, lacy delicates. I smiled back at him warmly. I leaned over the desk and patted comfortingly at his claw, "I'd be more than happy to take care of your little diva."

"T-Thank you," he spoke softly in a deep grumble.

The moment I laughed, his head shot up to look at me, "You sure you don't wanna come along King Bowser?"

His face went an even brighter shade of red and I laughed at his absolute horror. He seemed to come out of it a bit and growled, "Oh yeah, like I'd _really_ like that."

"Well don't worry," I chuckled, "I'll take good care of Wendy."

"Ugh," he swiped a clawed-hand over his face, "Even one daughter is one too many. There's too much trouble, drama and regulation involved with raising one of them. They're nothing but overly sensitive, demanding things."

I chuckled a bit, "Are you sure? That also sounds a bit like Junior and he's a boy."

"Yeah? Well in a couple of years Junior won't have all kinds of pervs eying up the contours of his body or trying to sleep with him," Bowser growled, "Best idea I had was sending Wendy to that all girl's school. I've _seen_ the way those little snot-nosed shells stare after my little Pookums…"

As Bowser was muttering to himself about kicking the snot out of Wendy's male peers, I grinned. This was my first time seeing this side of Bowser; King Bowser as an overprotective daddy? He had a special relationship with Junior, that much was obvious but it was now apparent to me that Wendy was clearly daddy's little girl.

And may the Stars help whichever Koopa boy was both fortunate and miserable enough to fall in love with the King's daughter.

"Well then, can I pick up Wendy for our," I grinned, "girlish excursion tomorrow?"

Bowser blinked, "Yeah sure. I wouldn't want you to go now, it's getting late out."

"'Kay, then I'll see you tomorrow."

"When you return," he replied surely, nodding his head.

"I'll have to give you all the juicy details," I laughed at his shocked expression yet again. On my way out I faced him, "By the way, you're a great dad."

He blinked before he smiled rather coyly for a large Koopa, "You think so?"

"I know so, night Bowser."

"Night Flower."

* * *

><p>The next morning I showered and dressed in a lime green tank top and shorts and took care of Firefly. My little pet howled happily as I both fed and watered him with his favorite plant food. I guess Bowser had the castle stock up on various fireflower treats and foods since he knew every weekend I brought Fire along with me.<p>

I told Twiddle Brown and Twiddle Green to place him on the roof so he could get as much sunlight as he pleased. And from just the few seconds they held him in their claws, I could tell Firefly had even more followers now. By the time I left my room, the twins were cooing, and tickling Firefly happily.

Kammy stopped by my room earlier, _'Princess, you are to visit her ladyship Wendy. When you enter the elevator, enter this key code and it will take you to the princess' floor."_

So I took the elevator, entered the secret key code and waited for the ride to finish. I entered Wendy's hall and nearly laughed, as all the statues on this floor were nothing but images of Wendy. So I guess each Koopaling has their own floor to live on but wouldn't that get lonely? I traveled to the end of the hall and found ornament pink doors.

They were encrusted with glitter and diamonds and very feminine in nature. I laughed, knowing it showcased Wendy's personality to a tee. Before I could finish wrapping on the door for a second time, I was surprised when the door was yanked upon by a petite Koopa.

Immediately my senses were assaulted with a blast of sugary sweet perfume and blaring pop music from her quarters. Her bored visage faded and her jewel-blue eyes sparkled as she grinned, "Oh my Stars! Dai you're finally here. It like took you long enough girl!"

I laughed as Wendy sprang into my arms, hugging me happy. Okay, so she smelled like fragrant roses, it was her room that smelled like cupcakes or something sweet. She hauled me into her room which literally looked like a princess' dream. Her room was painted petal pink and her carpet was fluffy and white, like a cat's fur.

As she was yammering away a mile a minute, she showed me her walk in closet that held all her gaudy pink clothes, shells, heels and dresses. Next was her luxurious powder room and vanity, which was far larger than even Peach's vanity. And she had far more cosmetics than my cousin.

With all the different shades and kinds of powders, mascara, nail polish, lip stick, and blush she procured I wondered if she had bought up an entire store. After Wendy's self-led tour of her large room, I told her to grab whatever she needed because we were going to be heading out soon.

"Like aren't you super excited!" Wendy squealed happily, "We're like gonna have another girl's day out together!"

I laughed, "Yeah of course! But this time I'm not getting a makeover, so it's going to be super fun."

"Well then chop chop!" Wendy laughed, "Let's get this thing underway."

We loaded up into a gorgeous carriage. It looked like something Cinderella would travel in; it had a beautiful pearl sheen to it and was very elegant. I was surprised such a delicate carriage even existed within the borders of the Darklands.

Yet again I knew Bowser had arranged for both his daughter and I to take the comeliest carriage he had available. I was surprised to see Kammy hovering by the pearl carriage. When she spotted us, she flew over, "Princess, Lady Daisy, I have been asked to supervise the urm… 'girl shopping'."

Wendy scrunched up her face, "King Daddy asked _you_ to come along?"

"Yes, I myself was…stunned," Kammy replied, fixing her glasses, "However his wickedness simply wanted it to be, 'a girls outing' and I suppose I count in that as well."

I grinned; imagining the serious, no-nonsense Kammy going underwear shopping with the frilly Koopa princess was almost as funny as picturing Bowser going. I wrapped an arm around both of them and beamed harder at Kammy's stunned visage, "Yes, well it's going to be a_ great _time going out! Let's have some girl time, ladies!"

"This only proves I'm not paid enough for this job," Kammy sighed.

We arrived at the Great Koopa mall and Wendy dragged me by hand to several stores and expensive shops that specialized in lingerie and pretty things. Yeah, this would have been _extremely_ awkward for Bowser if he went along with this.

"I know exactly where we should start first," Wendy beamed up at me, "They have all the hottest stuff there! Come on!"

I glanced over at Kammy who looked almost as put off as I did. She stood near the front of the store hesitantly, as if wondering whether or not someone of her caliber should be entering such a shop. I hid my laughter as I approached the magiKoopa.

"So ready to go bra and panty shopping Kammy?" I grinned at how she twitched at the words.

"Oh Stars," she groaned, "This is simply reminding me why I made sure not to have children. But as his majesty's representative…I suppose I cannot shrike from such duties now can I?"

"Nope, now come on. At last we both can be uncomfortable together," I chuckled, walking in with the magiKoopa.

"Hmm, I suppose when you look at it in that manner, then things are not too awkward," she replied thoughtfully.

We stepped into the shop and I was overwhelmed by how feminine everything was here. There was lace, corsets, stockings, all shades of pink, and frills everywhere I looked and the lingerie came in all colors and patterns. This was a super warehouse of undies…

Super pretty, girly undies…but undies none the less.

"…I lied," Kammy croaked softly beside me, "This is still_ very_ awkward."

I laughed, grabbing my stomach and chortling hard. Kammy looked at me as if I had gone insane. Well I'm glad for once we're not in here for me. Wendy went through multiple racks that were filled with frilly, pretty undergarments and grabbed whatever her heart desired as she traveled through the store.

Kammy and I slowly trailed behind her. I was amused as Kammy tried to study everything with a polite, professional interest. With how studious and severe as she was, it was more than obvious someone like Kammy didn't belong here. Then again I could probably say the same thing about myself.

I was dressed in a tank and shorts, nothing like the rest of the other customers who were dolled up and dressed to impress. I bet just like Kammy, it was clearly obvious this shop wasn't designed for a girl like myself.

Yet here both of us were, dragged in by the king's demanding daughter. Just as I was vacantly plucking through plum-colored knickers, a sales koopette came beside me.

"Hello miss," she was all smiles, "Can I help you with anything?"

"Er…" I stopped and looked over at the purple panties in hand, then launched them away from my person like a sling shot; I know, totally classy right?

"O-Oh! I'm just waiting for a friend to finish her shopping."

"Anything you need?" she was still beaming pleasantly, "Looking for anything for any special occasion?"

"Special occasion?" I asked, scrunching up my face, "What kind of occasion would a girl need lace for?"

"Well our clients buy for multiple occasions with the most popular being prom, celebrations, weddings…weddings nights," she beamed larger at my red face.

"Oh well, none of that counts for me," I laughed nervously and as I carelessly swung my arm, my hand got caught in a tiny bra.

She looked surprised, "What? No boyfriend you'd like to impress?"

"Why would I wanna impress my boyfriend with lingerie!" I hissed, prying my hand out; oh Stars I could feel my face glowing red.

She chuckled, arching a mischievous eyebrow, "Oh I don't know, why _would_ you?"

I felt my face redden even more as she giggled, "Oh my, so innocent, hmm?"

"Y-yeah? And what of it?" I huffed, "No boyfriend of mine would ever see me in anything less than a turtleneck and jeans!"

The Koopa girl beamed, "Modest hmm? I respect that."

"Daisy! Come with me," I heard Wendy's voice even before I could see her.

Wendy appeared amongst all the racks of lingerie, snatched my arm and dragged me through the store all the way to the paying counter. She flashed the cashier a shiny, golden Koopa visa that had many of the customers in awe.

"It can't believe it," the cashier koopette gasped, holding the credit card as if it were sacred, "I'm holding t-the Luxury Golden Bowser Card! It's rumored to be made of chucks of gold…"

I glared at her skeptically, "You're telling me King Bowser put _gold _in an ATM card? _Wow_. He's too much."

"Only the royal family has this card," Wendy grinned.

As we walked out the mall, Kammy shot out of there like she was on fire. I bet she was more than happy to be away from that store. As we loaded up in the carriage, Wendy spoke to me.

"This was like fun," I was surprised to see a genuine softness in her pretty blue eyes, "Thanks for coming with me Dai, it like, really means a lot."

"No problem Wendy."

"Hmm," she closed her eyes contently, "I like, knew I made an awesome choice when I decided to make you my friend."

I glanced at Kammy, who was smiling back at me. Then I glanced back at Wendy, "Yeah, same here."

* * *

><p>Before midday, we were back at the notorious Bowser's keep and as Wendy hurried off somewhere, Kammy was busy typing away on her Koopaberry curve, "I will go and retrieve his Majesty, I will not be long. Please wait here."<p>

"Alright."

Kammy floated off, heading towards the elevator as I stood in the grandiose lobby. I began to hum a melody and realized I was humming the tune of a piano. Where was that music coming from? Curious, I decided to go have a looksee for myself. As I traveled through the keep, the sound of a piano lured me forward.

It was some sort of classic ballad that as a princess, I should have recognized. Peach probably would have known the song, name of the composer and the year it had been written. I trailed through the dark palace, following the thick red carpeting as the sound of the music grew vibrant and more beautiful. While I didn't have what one would consider as a 'musician's ear,' I could tell the song was sad, hauntingly beautiful in yet another way.

I walked into an unfamiliar room until I came to a grand piano. There a Koopa with dark blue hair was effortlessly running his fingers over the keys, making the melody scintillate. Oh! It was the mysterious prince! I stood in silence and the whole time he played, his eyes were closed as if the sound of the music he made was medicinal.

I didn't realize when the last note was played and I blinked, suddenly becoming aware of my surroundings. A smooth, deep voice spoke softly across the room, "Toadoffsky ballad no. 356 _Pearlescent Dreams_."

"Oh," I replied softly.

Finally the mysterious Koopa opened his eyes. He sat with perfect posture and an intense stare; I got the vibe he was the serious type.

"Well, that was a beautiful song and you have true talent," I smiled, "My mother could play the harp and when she tried to teach me, I was just terrible. No one even bothered me with instruments since."

"How sad," again his cool, refined voice filled the air pleasantly, "the harp is quite a wondrous, nearly mythical instrument. While utterly difficult to master, the mastery of such an instrument is nothing but awarding. No lyrics can hope to sound quite as lovely and fulfilling as those of the harp. In comparison to the harp's mellifluous sound, other instruments only offer a bitter placebo."

I smiled, "Wow, that was great! You must be an amazing poet…Although I truly don't think Bowser would like poetry. He doesn't seem to care for much of that kind of stuff."

The blue haired Koopa smirked, "I find myself better served as a musician and I must agree with you about King Bowser having little desire for things such as poetry. Things that do not involve brawn and bloodshed do not concern the Koopa King."

I smiled at him, "So you think the King's a brute eh? You've got to be the first Koopa I know who thinks that! Well, hopefully you're smart enough not to say this to his face."

The blue-haired Koopa shook his head, "Only a fool would pick a fight with his lordship. King Bowser is the lord of all Koopa citizens for a reason."

"Prince Ludwig…right? Have I seen you around the palace before…?"

"No, I'm afraid I'm a bit of a visitor in these parts," while he smiled thinly, it didn't quite reach his eyes, "And yes your ladyship, I'm Prince Ludwig and I believe you are the Princess of Sarasaland, yes? I danced at your wondrous _Summani._"

"Yep, I'm Daisy. Nice to meet you."

He looked at me with his usual composed, cool stare as I tried to figure him out. Then something snapped into place as I said, "Hey! You're Bowser's son! Although you look nothing like him…"

Yet again another forced smile came to his face, "That's correct. And here I was hoping I could fool you into believing I was nothing but a mere musician."

"You're his first born son! And the heir to his throne."

Ludwig chuckled softly, shaking his head, "If only it were that simple. So you're the woman father is infatuated with now, hmm?"

He finally stood up from behind the piano and I realized just how tall he was. Whereas Bowser towered over me easily by three feet, he looked to be the height of a tall human guy, about six feet. And he was buff, but not super heavy like Bowser but more of a leaner, toned kind of look to him.

Hmm, you know I'm starting to think the Koopa race has some kind of patent on being _ripped._

Damn.

Koopas one, humans zero.

As he approached with mild curiosity drawn on his face, I stared at him. I couldn't find any of Bowser's features in him; blue hair, lean build, even his eyes weren't red. In fact in the candle light, his eyes were a silvery, pale blue. Weird, how he could look nothing at all like his dad?

But he did have horns, a male Koopa thing I believe. But then again maybe he just took after his mother strongly, like I did.

"Father had an infatuation with another human princess," he spoke softly, "Princess Peach I believe her name is. Whereas father has multiple flaws, Princess Peach seemed almost textbook perfect. She was always manicured to faultlessness, seemed to speak impeccably and with pleasant decor and even had an endless patience. So why would father downgrade for you?"

I frowned, "_Downgrade_? I am not some remedial…version of my cousin! She and I are two different women even if our fathers share the same mother. We look nothing alike and where she excels at being motherly and feminine, I kickass in sports and being awesome!"

I poked him in the chest, ignoring the slight shock that crossed his face, "So don't you give me that 'you're a remedial princess spiel'. Oh and one more thing, I'm not above kicking your ass."

For a moment the prince stared at me, looking at bit taken back but then he grinned. This time his smile looked like a true one, "Forgive my audacity, I assure you Princess I shall never make the same mistake twice."

"Good," I huffed crossing my arms.

He laughed at my stubborn expression and his stern visage became warmer. I was surprised at the rather male-esque way his eyes studied me with interest, "After such an inexcusable blunder, perhaps I should reintroduce myself."

"Huh? Oh that won't be necessary Prince Ludwig, I—"

"But I insist."

He lifted my hand and gently pressed a kiss to my palm. Surprised, I flushed when I received a rather cunning smirk from the prince.

"Oh Floooooooooooower!" I heard Bowser's voice echo throughout the room. And from the side of my vision, I saw Ludwig stiffen at the sound of his father's voice.

Bowser entered the room grinning, "There you are. What are you doing in this room? It's as dusty as hell in here. No one ever uses this place but—"

He trailed off mid-sentence as he realized someone else was in the room and that someone was his eldest. For a moment they both stared at each other, frozen as if time had stopped. Bowser appeared a bit surprised and Ludwig stared back neutrally, with his icy blue eyes narrowed to slits. I blinked, eyes darting between the two and wondering why the hell no one was moving or even saying anything.

And just before I could interject with a funny comment, it was oddly mirror-like when both Koopas straightened and composed their faces at the same time. All surprise was wiped from Bowser's face as his son's face was completely blank. Bowser nodded his head, "Ludwig."

The prince inclined his head respectfully, "…Lord Father."

"I didn't know…" Bowser cleared his throat before he spoke again, but this time with a distinct edge to his voice, "that you would be coming home today."

"Yes, that is because spring quarter at the academy is finished," Ludwig replied softly, "Our siblings, save for Morton, have returned home as well. I have started to tour with the DoReMi orchestra."

Bowser nodded his head, eyes narrowed in thought. Ludwig remained perfectly still, as if he were a solider standing before a commander and not his father. This was a _really _awkward environment for me to be in; it was obvious there was strife between them and yet they were both trying to pretend it didn't exist.

"Well…" Ludwig moved to collect the sheets of his music at his piano, "I shall see you around Lord Father."

Yet again Ludwig received a wordless nod from Bowser and with each movement made, the king Koopa's red eyes trailed after him diligently. Ludwig turned to head out but before he was out the door, he stopped to look in my direction.

"It was a pleasure to speak with you princess," just the slightest touch of warmth came into his eyes.

"Likewise prince," I beamed up at him, "Hopefully we can talk more next time!"

His cool gaze lingered on me a bit longer before he turned and left the room. Once Ludwig disappeared completely, I turned to look at Bowser. The King Koopa's brows were furrowed as he stared after his son's retreating form. He was so busy watching Ludwig's departure that he didn't notice when I walked up to him and placed a hand upon his shoulder.

He jumped the moment my hand came in contact with his shell, "Hey? Anybody home?"

"Huh? Yeah," he moved my hand from his shoulder and locked his arm around my back, "Come on, let's go."

* * *

><p>"<em>Ooh<em>, and what do we have 'ere?"

While the King ushered Daisy towards the elevator, talking animatedly about nothing in particular, a teenage Koopa prince stood at the top of the third floor's balcony. While the party below was unaware of his presence, he was watching his father in curiosity. He, just like his fellow brothers and sister, were done with their schoolings for the term.

Roy smirked, arching an amused eyebrow ridge at the placement of his father's arm on the lady and the way that his tail wagged. He couldn't even remember the last time he saw his father's tail wag happily. _This is too damn rich, ain't no way this is gonna be hush-hush for much longer. _And Roy's thinking was correct because his younger siblings suddenly popped up beside him.

"Hey Roy-Boy!" Larry called out happily, grinning widely, "Whatcha doin'?" Then a sly look, "Tryin' to look down a maid's shirt again?"

"Nope," Roy turned his head to look over his shoulder, "Just watchin' King Pops and this new gal."

"Who? Who?" Lemmy popped up beside his twin.

"He's with a lady," Iggy spoke softly, "Wonder who she is…"

"Oooh!" Larry purred, wiggling his eyebrows, "Who's the new broad King Daddio's toting around? The Sarasaland lady right?"

"Her name is Princess Daisy, egghead," Lemmy replied in a faux snooty voice, "And you will do well to show her proper respect."

"Well then, pardon my rudeness, Sire dipstick," Larry even bowed and used a snooty voice of his own.

"Righto, O Sire Failsalot."

"Smashing! Good one Lord Bastard McBastard."

"Quite the cheeky one eh Sire Snaggletooth?"

"Ohoho, tongue and cheek today are we Lord Asshole?"

"Lord McFatass."

"No sire, it is you who is Lord McFatass."

"Cheerio then Lord Mcloserface."

"Will both of ya stop that stupid voice already?" Roy growled, "Geesh, its' been one damn day in da keep and youse kids are drivin' me crazy."

"_Youse _kids!" Larry laughed, mocking his older brother.

"_Youse meddling kids_!" Lemmy even shook his fist.

While Roy growled, Iggy laughed softly; he personally missed being away from the twins, they kept things interesting.

Two other heads popped up beside Roy to peer down at the 'new broad.' Beside their father was a small human girl with reddish-brown hair and an athletically slim form. Roy smirked, while she was skinny, he did notice the human broad had 'padding' in all the right places.

Roy smirked at his brothers, "She ain't that bad lookin' for a human broad."

"I think she's hot!" said Larry, "What do you think Lems?"

Lemmy grinned back at his twin, "No doubt bro!"

"She's a good eight on tha Richter scale," Roy laughed, even raising his shades from his eyes to look at Daisy better, "A nine in a bikini."

"I think she's a ten!" Lemmy chirruped happily.

"She is pretty lovely," Iggy's soft tenor was almost missed in the midst of his rambunctious brothers.

"I love chicks wit legs dat go on and on for days," Roy grinned, "and hers seem endless."

"Milf for sure," Lemmy chuckled.

"Wait," Larry shook his head, "She can't be a milf if…King Daddio ends up marrying her. Otherwise things get nasty and...incesty…"

"Incesty?" Lemmy raised both eyebrows.

"Yes, incesty," Lemmy nodded his head.

"I wonder what King Dad's business with her is?" Iggy asked, "I remember hearing how she's a delegate for her kingdom…And yet she's receiving special treatment from King Dad…"

Lemmy grinned impishly, "Geesh Iggz, why do you _think _he's keeping her around for bro? To play checkers with her?"

"Yeah," Roy laughed, elbowing Lemmy, "Checkers unda tha covers!"

Roy and the twins laughed as Iggy shook his head, "Well not only just that! But I mean…he really likes her! I can tell!"

"Yeah?" Roy arched an eyebrow, "How so?"

"Don't you watch any of the news reports?" Iggy frowned, "Each week King Dad does stuff with her; he played soccer with her, took her out to icecream…He even took her to Junior's kindergarten family day."

Larry blinked, "Whoa, you got a good point there Iggasaurus. So do you think this thing they got is platonic? Sounds like he could be trying to wife her up! Platonic or not?"

"No _way_," Roy snorted, laughing even, "Ain't _no way_ King Pops keepin' a hot piece of human ass like dat around these parts without tappin' dat day in and day out!"

"What did you just say!" Iggy's voice cracked as a red smear of blush crossed his face and his eyes grew wide, "T-tapping? Ugh, that's just crude."

"I second that Roy-boy," Lemmy grinned as he reached out and pounded his fist against Roy's.

"I betcha King Pop's handles dat every night!" Larry, Lemmy and Roy both broke out into a roar of laughter.

"You know the saying bro," Larry grinned, "Once you go Koopa, you'll want nothing else 'cause we're super!"

"W-Well," Iggy coughed, rubbing the back of his head, "M-Maybe their relationship is meaningful and deep…N-Not all relationships have to be nothing but…uh, like _that_."

Roy shared a mischievous look with the twins before they both focused on Iggy, "What's 'like' that?"

He blushed deeper, "Y-You know. Like…uh…?"

"Touchy feely?" Roy grinned.

"Sexual?" Larry mirrored Roy's mischievous grin.

"Slippy-slidey?"

"Come on and say it already!" Lemmy said, trying not to laugh, "Three letter word broham, 's-e-x.'"

"Uh…" Iggy's face grew hotter and redder as his brothers laughed at him. He blinked as a cool shadow fell over him.

"You realize Lord Father would be highly displeased if he knew you were saying such crude things about his intended."

All four Koopa boys turned to see their eldest brother staring down at them neutrally. Iggy smiled as the twins blinked in stupor. Roy clenched his fists and growled; something about Ludwig innately pissed him off.

Maybe it was because nothing seemed to ever annoy his ever patient big brother. Or maybe it was because Ludwig carried himself as if he was oh so much better than them all. Or maybe it was because Ludwig preferred to be a damn sissy, preferring to read and write music as opposed to learning to how fight like any real Koopa should.

If Roy was fire, wild, ever hot and flaming with passion, strength and brute force then Ludwig was easily ice; cool, unyielding and perfectly stable. And elementally ice and fire never coexisted harmonically.

"Well," Roy growled, "If it ain't my favorite bro."

Ludwig narrowed his eyes, "If I'm not mistaken, I believe you and the twins have world history lessons you're both terribly tardy for. It's not only poor etiquette to be late, but it reflects badly on Lord Father as well."

"And who died and made youse boss!" Roy growled, "Last I checked, I ain't gotta check with youse to wipe my ass."

"Whether you admit it or not Roy," there wasn't even an angry inflection in Ludwig's words, "but as the eldest I have full responsibility over my siblings."

"Well I got a problem with dat. Heh, maybe we ought to settle this like Koopas," Roy growled, "Tha first one pinned to tha floor loses."

Wide-eyed, Lemmy and Larry looked between their brothers as the atmosphere around them was clearly hostile. Last thing the twins needed was to be caught in between a fight involving their two strongest, biggest siblings.

"Whoa, time out now," Lemmy said.

"Tiiiiiiiime out!" Larry cried out, "No fighting!"

"Yep! No fighting!"

"P-please don't do this," Iggy spoke softly.

"Shut up," Roy snarled, eyes narrowed, "I'm talkin' ta big bruh."

Roy was a Koopa that took heavily after their father; he was large in both height and girth and was built of nothing but pure muscle. Even as a teenager the prince was known for his brutality and impressive strength.

Ludwig, who was far leaner and preferred to culture his mind, had an already impressive mastery of blowing flames. Out of all of Bowser's children, he could produce the hottest flame. The silence dragged between the two as they stared each other down, fire and ice meeting at an unyielding middle.

Ludwig's expression didn't change, "If I was you Roy, Lemmy, Larry I would make haste. You know how terribly angry Lord Father becomes when you miss your lessons. He would rage for days."

For a moment they both stared each other down, Roy's glare hot as Ludwig's features remained perfectly composed and cool. With a loud snort Roy began to leave, walking past Ludwig. It wasn't missed how he made sure to knock shoulders as he went.

"Come on twinises, let's blow dis joint."

The twins, who were far more intimidated by their eldest brother gulped, before they both took off after Roy, "H-Hey! Wait for me Roy-boy!"

"Yeah me too! Later Luddy!"

Once the last echoes of Larry and Lemmy's steps faded away, Ludwig turned to face Iggy. Iggy looked up at his brother and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "Heh…Uh, thanks for the help Big L. Gosh, I was sweating my shell off there."

Just the softest touches of a smile came upon Ludwig's face, "It is no problem at all. Don't let the likes of those bullies give you trouble."

"O-Okay…But Roy's waaaay bigger than I am! He could pound the Holy Stars out of me!"

"And I suppose for that reason you have been given something he lacks, a functioning brain. However," Ludwig turned to look over his shoulder, "I must admit I'm quite curious to see what all the commotion was about."

"Uh…"

Ludwig arched an eyebrow before he leaned over the balcony rail to see what his brothers had been staring at. A bit embarrassed at gaggling over the princess, Iggy averted his eyes, blushing, " W-We were just…Um…Heh, i-isn't she b-beautiful?"

The eldest prince's already elevated eyebrow rose a bit more, "Quite."

"W-We were discussing their relationship. S-So do you think their relationship is more t-than…" Iggy flushed again, "W-Well, you know…?"

"As in is their relationship more than being physical?" Ludwig was silent for a moment, then an exasperated look crossed his features, "Stars above, is _that _what you four were talking about?"

"Well…"

"Not that it is any of your business," Ludwig frowned, "But it is an ancient tradition how most if not all princesses are to remain pure until the day they are wed. This regulation is truer in human culture than ours. I highly doubt Lord Father and Princess Daisy have had any kind of relations. Such accusations are preposterous in nature."

"But Roy—"

"—Is an absolutely barbaric meathead who would be completely gratified if his life solely involved fighting and fornicating," Ludwig didn't miss a beat, "Do not even waste brain matter on him."

"Okay…" Iggy replied unsurely.

"Now then, I believe you also have some studies to attend. Flame blowing lessons if I'm correct...?" As Ludwig arched an eyebrow, he smirked at the way Iggy squeaked.

"Oh fiddlesticks! I _totally _forgot about that! I'm late! Thanks. I'll see you later Big L."

"I shall see you later too Iggy."

Once his brother was out of sight, Ludwig turned back around to study his father. Silver-blue eyes narrowed with keen interest, he watched as his Lord father laughed alongside of Princess Daisy. His father laughing and smiling? This was truly odd and if his meddling and usually dull-witted siblings could pick up on their father's odd behavior, then something was definitely up.

Things around the palace would certainly be interesting in the upcoming weeks, that was for sure.

* * *

><p>Alice: Hope you all enjoyed! ^_^ Yay! We've met even more Koopalings! And it seems the royal koopa family has some kinks to work out! X) Read and review! :) (waves)<p> 


	17. Sarasaland: An elegant day with King

Alice: (Looks at reviews) Okay…that should be the last of my…editing…(sighs) A new chapter complete! ^_^

Ultrra: Hey! I helped too! So when reviewers thank you for being awesome, I should get some credit too! T_T

Alice: (raises an eyebrow) Oh yeah? How did _you _help?

Ultrra: Remember when you wrote the Summani?

Alice:Yes I do…

Ultrra: Well, think about how I helped.

_( XXX weeks ago, somewhere in a California Suburb at 5 pm)_

_Alice: (Typing on laptop)…_

_Utrra: (Playing PS3) Alice, you want in on Street Fighter IV?_

_Alice: (Sigh) No…I must finish this chapter…_

_Ultrra: (Having fun) HADOUKEN! WAHAHAHA!_

_Alice: U_U_

_(At 9pm)_

_Alice: (Still typing)_

_Ultrra: (Eating a delectable dinner) Hey Allygurl, you hungry?_

_Alice: No…(squints) I'm…almost done…_

_Ultrra: (Continues to eat) MMM, this STEAK Alice, this STEAK is magic!_

_Alice:…._

_(12:01 am)_

_Alice: (Passed out on a laptop) _ Must…finish…fiiiiniiiiishhhh_

_Ultrra: (happily asleep) ^_^_

Ultrra: … Oh come on, I wasn't _that _big of a tool.

Alice: (Stares) No, you were.

Ultrra: Well…deal with it.

Alice: (Tearing up) I wanted to be Chun Li…(Whispers) So badly…

Ultrra: (looks to the audience) Well, what Alice is supposed to say is the one year anniversary for this story is about to pass by! ^_^ And she was thinking of having a funny Q & A session with the characters.

Alice: OH YEAH! Of course I'll only do it if you want me to! So if we get enough approval, tell us in in your review! And ask your question! :D

Ultrra: Or questions?

Alice: Yeah sure! I won't progress the storyline, but it'll be amusing all the same. So remember if you want it done, go ahead and ask your question XD

Ultrra: What about questions like? 'Alicestarr, why do you suck so badly'?

Alice: (Stares at Ultrra)…They're obviously going to ask questions_ TO_ the characters. T_T

Ultrra: Oh! Like 'Bowser do you like cheese?'

Alice: Uh yeah sure (Worried look)…if THAT'S what you want to ask the King of koopas. X)

Ultrra: Oh! So questions like 'Daisy in your Summani, did you have fun?'

Alice: Yeah sure! Anything you wanna ask the characters! OCs included! ^_^

Ultrra: Cool. Well hope you guys read, enjoy and why don't ya drop a review? ;)

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>It was ten a.m. Sunday morning and I had been instructed by Kammy to arrive at Bowser's personal office. So en route I had a servant give instructions and I quickly found my way to the king's luxurious office. I wrapped on the door before a gruff, "Enter," sounded from the other side of the large doors.<p>

I opened the door, grinning, "It is I, O great King Bowser.

"Hey Flower."

Today the head honcho wasn't behind his bad-ass metal desk like usual. He was busy gazing out of a window with his arms resting behind his back pensively. Hmm, if Bowser was thinking that meant either he had _royally _screwed up somehow or he had a scheme brewing.

I took a seat and helped myself to a handful of cookies he had set on his desk. Ooh white chocolate chip, my favorite! I closed my eyes and savored the hot, delicious gooey cookie goodness, "_Mmm. _Absolutely _delicious."_

I heard Bowser's chuckle, "Flower _please_. Must you openly objectify me so?"

I almost choked on my second cookie and laughed, "Oh gosh. You're a piece of _work._ So anyways, what's up King Bowser?"

"Not much," he sighed, "I cleared my schedule today and I…just wanted to talk to you about…something."

"Such as?"

After polishing off three cookies and licking my fingers clean, I realized he was _still _staring out of the window. What was so interesting out there? Heh, was someone streaking or something? What could really be that interesting to keep him looking?

"Bowser?"

"You know, I was just thinking of something," he turned to look at me, face perfectly straight. The shade of the blinds threw his face into ominous shadows, "You've done me a great favor and I've yet to show my appreciation for it."

He must be talking about taking Wendy shopping. Really it wasn't such a big deal; in fact it was kind of fun to do.

"Bowser," I grinned, "Did you forget the Rawk Hawk tickets you scored for me? The total queen treatment I've been receiving here? My room in this palace is _nicer _then my own room at home! You've shown me more than enough gratitude; you've opened your home and introduced your children to me. This was a pleasure to do for you."

"No," Bowser was surprisingly persistent, "I was thinking we could do something a little more…special today."

He moved across the room and clambered over towards me. I was a bit startled when he moved to stand a few feet away from me. His expression was hidden with a perfect pokerface as his eyes stared into mine. Since I was sitting, I really had to crane my neck to look up at him.

"Bowser…?" I asked tentatively.

"There's a piano recital I want to go to today, a big upscale shindig. You know, one of those formal attire events, totally fancy-smancy and upper echelon business. So I was wondering if…"

He cut off mid-sentence, suddenly staring at me intensely. So while the koopa king looked as if he was trying to scorch me with laser vision, I kind of just…well blinked up at him. What else could I do? He snarled loudly as he hurriedly turned his back to me.

"_Ugh! _Come on and _ask _her already you sissy koopa…" he growled softly, "Okay…Okay…here goes nothing…"

I held a hand to my mouth to hold back a laugh; was he _really _having pep talk with…himself?

He slowly turned back around to face me, appearing more determined than before. I was startled when he dropped to a knee—thunderously loud, with his metallic wrist bands clamoring—and took a hold of my hand within his, "I…want—no would be _honored _if you would accompany me as my date."

For one of the few times I've ever seen, he actually gave a warm smile—well, as nice as a smile as you could receive from Bowser, "So…what say you?"

I stared down at him, mouth agape as his smile slowly turned mischievous.

"…"

* * *

><p>"Why Dai," Wendy cooed, grinning like the cat in cream, "You seem a bit…flustered if I say so."<p>

Stubborn, I huffed and even went as far as turning my head away from her, "That's…not true."

"Stars you're like, such an awful liar," And she looked amused, "King Daddy put some 'moves' on you eh?"

"He did _not!"_

"You're still blushing!" Wendy giggled, "My, my, King Daddy must have wooed you good."

Wendy was in my guestroom, rummaging through my glamorous walk in closet as Junior was happily splashing around in the jacuzzi. I'm guessing my room must have been 'the place to be' because the twins were playing koopa monopoly with their brother Iggy.

When the twins came bounding into my room, they brought Iggy with them. Immediately I was taken with the sweetie; he was shy, soft-spoken and blushed anytime I looked at him for longer than two seconds. He was so cute!

So while the twins were crowing, laughing loudly during their gameplay, I was across the room speaking to Wendy. Wendy and I were having a quiet 'girl conversation.' A girl conversation that revolved around her father's behavior.

"I'm not blushing!" I pushed my bangs out of my face, trying to ignore my own blush," He just…caught me off guard is all."

Wendy pulled out two dresses, "Uh huh, _sure. _So what do you think Dai? Blue or red?"

I looked at her two choices and grimaced; the blue dress had too many ridiculous frills. And don't even get me started on the red dress. It was _the_ clichéd red dress everyone knew about; short, form-fitting and scandalous. I'm pretty sure Bowser said this event was upscale and classy; if I wore that dress, people would probably ask me, 'How much?' for my services.

I must have scrunched up my face because Wendy hummed thoughtfully, "Don't like? Okay…Guess I'll have to go looking for another dress then…"

"Can't I wear a really nice pantsuit?" I mumbled, "Long dresses make me feel nervous. I trip, stumble and fall over thin air."

"_No_!" Wendy roared, then the insane glint disappeared and she smiled sweetly, "You're like going to look like a vision tonight! So big dresses intimidate you eh? I think I've got the perfect one…"

The koopa princess pulled out a long, sleek black dress. She purred happily, admiring the way it sparkled under the light, "Now this is perfect. Stars, King Daddy _would_ ask you to a high-end event the day of…Ugh _men._ Don't they like realize, we need days to properly get ready? Speaking of men…"

Wendy snapped around to look at her younger brothers, "Lem, Lars, Iggz, Junior, you four have to like get out of here a.s.a.p."

Three heads popped up as Larry frowned, "But why Wendster? Why do we have to bounce?"

"Yeah!" Lemmy protested, "Why do we gotta bounce like chumps?"

"Like chumps!" Larry chorused.

"We were on extra good behavior too!" Lemmy frowned, "No crazy jokes at all!"

"We didn't even blow anything up!" Larry exclaimed.

"Or break anything…"

"Or wreak havoc."

"Nuh uh, no havoc wreaking at all."

"Well you losers just gotta deal!" Wendy sniffed haughtily, "I like, got to get Dai dressed and ready for a posh event. And like, it's indecent for boys to be around for this kind of stuff."

The twins simultaneously raised their eyebrows, "You mean as in Princess Daisy is…"

"She's going to _strip?"_ Larry squealed happily, a crazy grin stretching across his face.

Iggy, who had been contently sipping a beverage, sprayed it across the room with admirable distance. He choked, hacking as his face grew bright red, "W-What was that?"

"Um," Lemmy coughed into his fist, "I think we'll _stay _for this occasion, sis."

"Mama Daisy will need our support," Larry said with a faux serious face, "And as such, I plan to give her my full support."

"You know the saying," Lemmy also replied with a straight face, "The family that strips together…stays together."

Iggy simply gaped at his two brothers in stupor while Wendy's reaction was a bit funnier. Her left eye twitched as she growled ferociously; yup, she was Bowser's daughter alright, they made the exact same furious face and had the same hair-thin temper too.

She shrieked angrily, "Y-You little pervs! Like get the hell out of here before I remove the _specific_ anatomy from your bodies that makes you _males._ Even if they are _minuscule_ and _microscopic_!_"_

Iggy continued to cough, waving his hands frantically, "W-Wait Wendy! I-I-I'm not _with _these t-two. Don't kill me!"

"Well," Lemmy stood up with an indignant look, "I know when I'm not wanted…"

"Me too," Larry spoke in the same 'insulted' voice, "Come along Iggzilla, we shall leave these ladies and we shall do _male_ things…such as bashing our heads against walls and making all sorts of bodily noises. Later day Foxy Mama."

I laughed, "Bye Larry…Lemmy."

"Toodles Ma. And our 'man time' will be glorious," Larry harrumphed as well, "We shall lose much IQ doing male things."

Iggy blinked "B-But what if I don't want to?"

As Larry went over to the Jacuzzi and retrieved Junior, Lemmy pulled Iggy out the door. I laughed at Iggy's confusion and Junior seemed oblivious; happy he was receiving a free piggyback ride from his brother. On his way out Junior looked over at us, "Bye Mama Daisy!"

"Later BJ," I winked at him, "Bye Iggy."

"Bye M-Miss Daisy," he smiled softly.

"Did you see that!" Larry shrieked, "Junior got a wink!"

"Apparently…" Larry replied in a thoughtful voice, "the recently potty trained six-year older has better Casanova skills then all of us combined."

"The shame of it all."

"The _fricking _humiliation of it all."

With a growl, Wendy slammed the door shut on all of them. I continued to laugh as she rolled her eyes, "Ugh! Like see the idiocy I have to deal with!"

"I think you're lucky to have siblings," I smiled, "I've always wanted a younger brother."

"Then please take one of mine," she hissed, "I like, have plenty of leftovers."

"I'll have to take you up on that one day," I grinned, "I've been secretly planning on kidnapping Junior. He's a cute little butterball."

"Well," Wendy grinned, "We have a few hours to make you red-carpet worthy and like, much to do. I think I can like, handle hair and makeup," she lightly coiled a strand of my hair against a manicured claw, "I would call Parry but I think he's on vacation…Oh well. Now come on, all my stuff is in my room."

As promised Wendy dragged me to her room which was filled with flat irons and her shelves were overstocked with the most expensive beauty products; I was a bit overwhelmed one girl could have a mini salon in her own room. The whole time she styled me, Wendy chattered on about nothing in particular but I think I'm starting to learn she liked having another girl around.

"My Stars, what was she thinking with those abysmal shoes? So I told this girl, 'if you ever try to wear those shoes with that dress again. I'll hurt you.' It was that bad, Dai."

"Really?" I'm pretending I care.

"Stars it was atrocious," Wendy hissed as she brushed my hair, "Like my worst nightmares come true."

"Uh huh…"

She fixed my hair into a simple, yet elegant updo and dabbed my eyelids with a smoky eyeshadow and finished the look with bubble gum pink lipstick. After what seemed like hours, she stepped back, looking pleased, "Like, my handy work is always amazing! You look fabulous. Now…this necklace will make you look great."

* * *

><p>Bowser paced around the foyer, claws behind his back as Kamek and Kammy spoke to one another softly. The king of all studmuffins was dressed to kill in an uncomfortable formal black shell that made him tug at the collar every now and then. His beloved spiked-bands were replaced with silver cuffs that felt foreign against his skin.<p>

Spines, claws and horns had been polished to a perfected ivory sheen and he even dabbed on a trace of that ridiculous fragrance those humans loved so much. Cologne? _Ugh_. The king of koopas glared into a nearby mirror one last time and was pleased with his reflection; one sexilicious koopa, hot and ready to order. _Ding!_

Then he resumed his pacing. He growled impatiently, "Hag, Geezer _what _is taking so long? It's been hours since I asked Flower to accompany me."

"Your Lordship, not to sound condescending," Kammy sniffed, "But she must get ready; hair, makeup and appropriate attire must be selected."

"Bowser, there's no need to be nervous," Kamek chuckled, "She's going to be ready in no time."

Bowser halted, "Nervous? You think _I'm _nervous?" Then he began to laugh, "That has to be the dumbest thing I've heard in awhile. Me? Nervous? _Me?"_

"Someone's in denial," Kamek whispered to a smirking Kammy.

The king koopa halted again, this time snapping around. He stomped over towards his advisors, eyes narrowed and steam wafting from a nostril, "I'm sorry but did you say _something?"_

Kamek laughed nervously, "B-Bowser I-I-I-I was o-only telling you what I…Erm my you look debonair! Princess Daisy is going to swoon when she sees you!"

"That's what I thought," Bowser snorted.

"Kamek's right your Lordship," Kammy replied, a small grin on her face, "It's more than obvious you're nervous."

Bowser snorted, "_PSHAW_! Why would I be nervous? I'm _the _most powerful king who ever _existed!"_

"Oh I don't know your Lordship," Kammy grinned, pretending to take an interest in her nails, "Perchance it is because you are going out with a young woman this evening…?"

"So you think I'm nervous because I'm going out on a date?" Bowser squawked and then he began to laugh, "Oh that's _rich. _I've dated numerous girls, beauty pageant winners, models, actresses," Then he made a sly look, "And had _fun _with a good number of them too."

"Perhaps," Kammy still seemed unperturbed, "But unlike those other _floozies, _you didn't genuinely like them. Princess Sarasaland is a woman of real substance and we all know it'll take more than being a king to impress her."

The female advisor dropped the timbre of her voice until it was a soft whisper, "Dare I say you're quite enamored and never felt this way about a woman before."

Kamek grinned as Bowser suddenly halted mid-step, almost tripping over his own footfalls. And lightning fast Bowser spun around, fists clenched. Even though her reigning king was glaring down at her, Kammy still looked amused; it was hard to take a blushing king seriously.

"Y-Yeah I like her," he growled, fists shaking and a contradictory blush clashing with a narrowed glare, "And I like her a lot. B-But _what_ of it? And for the last time, I am _not _nervous."

"Of course your liege," Kammy continued to smirk, "may you resume your pacing then."

"Thank you! And I _shall!" _Bowser growled, stomping harder, "I'm gonna pace a damn hole in this floor if I choose to!"

"And may you continue to sweat," Kammy replied as Kamek coughed, hiding his laughter.

"And I _will _continue to sweat," Bowser growled back, wiping at his forehead irritably.

"And yet we are not nervous at all?" Kammy whispered.

"Ugh, I wish she'd come down those steps," he growled, placing a hand on his stomach, "My stomach feels weird. All fluttery and shaky…and nonsense."

"Yoohoo!" A voice sing-sang.

Bowser halted mid-step when he realized that sound came from the top of the staircase, sounding suspiciously a lot like Flower. The king hurriedly spun around, eyes wide at the sight of the woman standing at the top of the steps.

"Hey," she said softly, smiling.

"Hey," he managed to reply back.

The beautiful woman had her ginger hair swept up and wore an alluring dark eyeshadow that made her bright blue eyes shine. She was wearing a form-fitting dress that hugged her slender frame in all the right areas and as she started to walk down the steps, Bowser realized her dress had slits up the side, revealing those perfect legs he loved.

Stars, how he _loved _dresses with slits.

The king koopa didn't realize he was shamelessly ogling her; yeah he was_ way_ too busy staring at those shapely legs that went on for _days. _Belatedly he noticed she was wearing heels; wait a minute, Daisy for the life of her couldn't walk in heels. Almost like a jinx his Flower had a misstep and shrieked as she lost her balance.

"Aw crude!" she squeaked.

"D-Don't worry! I got ya!" Bowser replied.

He leapt up the staircase and took a knee just as the princess went barreling into his arms. Both parties blinked, still stunned as their minds raced to catch up. Daisy turned to look up at Bowser as he looked down at the princess. A sly grin crawled onto his face as Daisy blushed, "T-Thank you."

"My, my Flower," he purred, "you needn't do something so desperate to get into my arms."

"I…" she lowered her head, face deep red, "Oh _shut up_."

"Like really Dai? How did you manage to trip in one-inch heels!" Wendy squawked from the top of the stairwell. Then Wendy took in the moment a little closer. She realized Daisy had ended up right into her father's arms and grinned like a mad koopette, "Um…like nevermind…Have fun King Daddy!"

"I will sugarshell. Now then," Bowser rose to his feet, still carrying Daisy, "Shall we get this evening started? We've got to get going."

"Sure," she smiled, "But can you put me down?"

Bowser laughed, "After that stairwell spectacle? I don't think so."

"Ugh fine," with a huff, Daisy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her torso stubbornly.

Just as he was stomping towards the clown copter, Bowser looked back at his two advisors. When he was sure Daisy wasn't paying attention, Bowser gave them a thumbs up with a terrifying grin. This gesture roughly translated to: _Hell yeah, I've landed a desert babe in my hands!_

Kammy nodded her head.

_Wonderful. Have fun Lord Bowser._

Kamek grinned and gave a thumbs up back.

_Go get her! Sweep her off her feet Casanova koopa, rawr!_

* * *

><p>The entire ride Bowser refused to tell me where we were going. He just kept ignoring me and if I kept trying to ask him, he'd just turn the attention back onto me with an off-colored comment. Apparently he <em>really <em>liked dresses with slits in them. And secondly, he was borderline obsessed with my legs I'm sure.

"You still won't tell me where we're going," I groaned.

"Nope," then he grinned "Unless you want to pay the toll."

I sighed; we've been through this ten times already. The 'toll' for answering his question would be a ten-minute kiss. I didn't even know a kiss could last that long. So I guess he really didn't want me to find anything out.

What a jerk.

"Have I told you how stunning you look?" Bowser smirked, looking in my direction.

I laughed, "This would be the twelfth time this evening."

He chuckled, "Just checking. It's a good thing I'm not a detective."

"Why?"

"Heh," he chuckled, "Or I'd have to arrest you; it's got to be a crime to look that good."

I snorted unattractively as he laughed loudly, "Oh Stars that was _stupid!_" I laughed along with him, "Please don't ever say that again!"

"Deal."

As the cool wind rushed passed my face, I sighed happily; this'll sound so corny but if I spread my arms out I can pretend I'm flying. The lights of glowing skyscrapers, cities and the glorious Darkland skyline blazed enchantingly in the evening sky.

"Here we are," Bowser spoke to himself softly.

The clown car began to drop altitude and immediately I could hear the loud bustle of the nightlife below. There were cars honking, multicolored lights flashing and koopas of all shapes and sizes traveling the streets in droves. As we soared overhead the citizens began to look up. Some waved, others cheers and even flashed victory signs at us. A boisterous "Long live the king!" chant filled the air.

"We're almost there," Bowser grinned over his shoulder at me, "Ready to see your surprise?"

"I've been ready to see my surprise!" I laughed.

It was moments later we touched down in front of an ostentatious theater that glowed like a marvelous golden aurora against the blackening horizon. At the notorious clown car's landing, a sea of paparazzi rushed over, snapping thousands of blinding lights. I frowned, squinting against the blinding flashes as thousands of koopas huddled around the clown car.

Bowser laughed, "Geesh, haven't even gotten out the ride yet and they're all over us."

The valets and workers managed to run off the majority of the paparazzi, or at least move them back a safe distance. Ahead of us I saw long lines of stretch limos and well-dressed koopa elites stepping out of their rides. The moment Bowser hopped out of the clown car, the paparazzi went into a bloodthirsty frenzy.

Bowser gave a quick wave and before I could protest, helped me out. His hands lifted at my waist and a slew of mischievous wolf-whistles flooded the air. The clicking of cameras snapped away in a barrage of glittering light as he set me onto my feet. I blushed as the koopa paparazzi were suddenly leering at us.

"Lookin' good tonight your wickedness!"

"I'd watch those hands there, your majesty."

"Can those hands get any lower, your highness?"

Their laughter filled the air as I blushed brightly but Bowser barely seemed bothered. Either he was really good at ignoring the paparazzi or he was just used to them. He tossed the keys to a valet, well more like hurled them. The koopa was nearly bowled over!

"Take care of the ride, all right? I just had her buffed out yesterday."

"Y-Yes your lordship!" The valet saluted.

I looked around, hoping to find some sort of clue about our whereabouts; there were koopas dressed glamorously; posh shells polished and ladies adorned with glittering gems and elegant evening dresses. And from what I can tell, we were about to enter a theater of some sort.

"Look! It's King Bowser!"

In a matter of seconds _more _paparazzi swarmed around like angry bees. Bowser chuckled, "I think it'd be best if you stuck closer to me for a bit. These people tend to get a little pushy and I don't want to have to beat someone up if they molest you."

"If they do _what? _I will kick their—whoa!"

I gasped when a clawed hand wrapped around my waist and pulled me firmly against a strong, shelled torso. He grinned underhandedly as we continued to move through the masses. I can't believe he wasn't annoyed with these people! They were screaming, snapping bright painful pictures and yelling really obnoxious questions!

"King Bowser!"

"King Bowser over here!"

"Who's your date, King Bowser?"

"Is that Princess Daisy?"

"Where's Princess Peach?"

"Out with the old, in with the new eh?"

"Redheads are in, eh?"

"She's stunning!"

"You look beautiful princess!"

"What a stone cold fox!"

"How about a smile over here?"

"No over here!"

Bowser enclosed a firmer hand around me as we walked through the eager paparazzi. Truthfully I was a bit worried; these koopas were pushy, if not borderline intrusive. Compared to them I'm a tiny human girl and I could see myself getting hurt, trampled from their aggression.

But King Bowser held me close, walking valiantly through the crowd like a god amongst mortals. He kept me perfectly safe, glaring and even snarling at some of the bolder paparazzi who crowded too close to me.

"Don't worry," he whispered into my ear, "once we get inside, they're not allowed in."

"Okay," I looked up at him and smiled, "But I'm not worried about them anymore."

He looked surprised, "You're not?"

"No," I grinned up at him, "Not when I have a massive, eight-foot tall guardian to protect me. Like a boss."

He grinned, even growling a bit as he held onto me tighter. Another valet opened the door and bowed to us, "Lord, lady, welcome to the Grand Serous Theater, may you enjoy your time within our rich cultural center."

"Serous…Serous…" I muttered softly to myself, "Now why does that name sound familiar?"

Bowser grinned, "You've heard of Serous Koopa?"

"Yeah I think so," I hummed thoughtfully, "Kammy mentioned his name in passing once."

"He's my grandfather, that's why," Bowser's expression softened just the slightest, "He loved events like these. Granddad took me to many different plays and performances as a koopaling."

"Speaking of which, what are we going to see today?"

A koopa approached the both of us, "Madam, would you like a playbill?"

"Playbill?" I asked softly, "Ah ha! We're…seeing a performance!"

"I suppose we are," Bowser laughed.

"You big lug!" I laughed playfully pinching his arm, "You could have just told me!"

"Ah," he waved his index finger with a grin, "Then that would have ruined the surprise!"

As Bowser checked in with the staff, I decided to peek in the playbill. Hmm, it looked like we were going to watch a piano recital from a world-renowned pianist. I blinked, realizing I recognized the musician's name! Holy flaming Stars! It was Ludwig!

I squealed happily; we were going to watch Ludwig perform! I spun around to find Bowser, "Hey King Bowser! I know your surprise! We're gonna see Lud—!"

And then I ran into a brick wall.

At least that's what it felt like anyways. I smacked right into the torso of a koopa and was sent to the floor in an inelegant sprawl. I growled, "Hey! You could watch where you're…"

A huge, super _buff _koopa was staring down at me. Like really, why do I choose to run into the koopas on steroids? This guy was bending over and he was_ still_ way over six feet tall. His biceps were huge; he could probably give Bowser a good run for his money in the strength department.

I tried to keep myself from squeaking, "Oh Stars you're just _massive."_

"I'm sorry," his deep, rumbling timbre didn't sound angry at all and his red eyes took me in curiously, "I did not hurt you, did I little human?"

"N-No! I'm perfectly okay!" I laughed nervously as he tilted his head, as if confused.

"Here, I shall make things right then, yes? Upsidaisy!" And with that he gently lifted me onto my feet.

"Uh…Thank you."

The koopa smiled largely; I think he had a brown spot over one of his eyes, "It is no problem tiny human woman. I must go now; I have the sound production to do for my brother's performance…"

A light bulb went on, "Wait!"

The lumbering koopa looked at me from over his shoulder, "…Yes little woman? I do not mean to sound rude but I must go so please…"

"That means you're Ludwig's brother," I chirruped happily, snapping my fingers.

Yet again the koopa titled his head in confusion; it was kind of cute, "You…know my eldest brother? I am a bit surprised…"

"I see you can't keep yourself out of trouble for a moment," Bowser came beside me and grinned. Then he looked at the nameless koopa, "Hey Morty, didn't know you were working this gig."

The nameless koopa's eye grew wide, "K-King Dad! _You're _here?"

Then he let out a shrill screech and stomped his feet; either he's really happy or he's trying to bring the house down, "King Dad!"

He pulled his father into a tight hug and managed to actually lift the king off the tips of his feet, "Oh yay! King Dad I'm so happy you're here! You never come to things like this! I am most pleased!"

I laughed at the scene; this 'Morty' was hoisting his dad off his feet, tail wagging happily and Bowser was grimacing in the hug, patting at his son's shoulder, "I know Morton…Say, how about you put your old man down? I think you're starting to break my ribs."

Still grinning largely, Morton let go, "Forgive my eagerness King Dad but I'm going to be the sound technician for Luddy! This is a _big _time gig! Thousands of people from seventy five different kingdoms have come to see this performance!"

"That's good son," Bowser gave an affectionate noogie, "You'll do your best for your brother right? He's really counting on you."

"I shall give my all!" Morton beamed, "This will be the best sound quality you've _ever _heard!"

"I believe you," Bowser grinned, "By the way, this is Princess Daisy of Sarasaland. She's a good…friend of mine."

"Oh, I see," Morton smiled down at me, "I did not realize I had met one so important to my father. Please forgive my lack of manners. I thought you looked familiar."

I laughed, "Morton please, you're probably the most mannerly person I've ever met!"

He took my hand in his own and shook it gently, "Now we have properly met. I think this is the correct way humans greet each other, yes?"

I grinned, "Yes this is more than fine."

He looked up at the clock on the wall, "Oh no! I must get going now! King Dad, it was nice to see you! And Ms. Daisy it was nice to meet you! I hope we shall see each other later!"

And with that the koopa prince turned and ran out of the room and believe me when I say that _no one_ wanted to be in his way. You'd probably die if he ran you over! I turned to Bowser and grinned, "So that's Morton huh? He's so…cute!"

I laughed as Bowser sighed, "Yeah that's Morty alright; beefcake extraordinaire but once you get to know him, he's so…gentle. A lover not a fighter and he has always loved music."

"Well since I know this is Ludwig's recital, I want to buy him some flowers," I smiled, "Wonder where I can buy some at…"

Bowser hummed thoughtfully, "I thought I saw some vendors around here somewhere…"

It wasn't too much longer when I found several floral vendors and bought a bouquet of fragrant blossoms to give Ludwig afterwards. We were lead to our seats and while Bowser was looking through the playbill, I was admiring the large theater.

Even though the theater was in the Darkland kingdom, hundreds and thousands of outsiders from multiple kingdoms were here, trying to find their seats. Humans, goombas, koopas and even boos alike were scurrying below our balcony section.

I peered up at Bowser, "So how do you feel?"

"Hmm? What do you mean?"

"Are you proud?" I beamed at the stolid koopa, "We've come to see a prestigious show with your _son_ performing. This has to be exciting!"

Bowser half shrugged, "Honestly I don't really know what to expect Flower. I've never been to one of these things before. I kinda feel like I'm out of my element."

"Well," I patted his hand, "Just watch your son perform and take all his talent in."

"Hmm," Bowser looked down in thought, "I can do that."

The lights dimmed and soon a rich voice wafted over the theater, I laughed, realizing it was Morton speaking, "_Ladies and gentlemen please take your seats. The performance will begin in just a few minutes."_

"That didn't sound like Morton at all," Bowser grinned.

"I know right! He had such a velvety smooth voice!" I giggled, "So _smooth, _it felt like a verbal hug!"

"That's because he gets it from his dad," Bowser grinned smugly.

"You? A velvety voice?" I snorted playfully, crossing my arms, "Oh please. I'll say it's gravelly and deep but not velvety smooth."

"Oh _really_?" he purred. I was surprised at the sudden transition to a smooth, oozing timbre and how _melting_ his voice was. Sensual like dark chocolate. Dare I say it was…sexy? I must have been gaping at him stupidly because he was grinning largely.

"Why so surprised? I just haven't been gifted with the opportunity to make you make you swoon." He continued on in that sinful, lady-killer bass.

"Bowser…" I stared at him, feeling surprised and a little of something else I couldn't explain, "You…You…"

"Interesting," his voice grew darker, silkily seductive as it dropped in pitch. Oh Stars, my stomach was doing flips_. _He leaned forward, smiling subtly, "Flower likes deep voices I see. So tell me princess, do you like my voice?"

He was inches away from my face and I felt myself blushing. _Hard. _Like schoolgirl level blushing, "Ah…Um…"

"Speechless, Beautiful?"

"Um..."

To my relief the lights dimmed completely, flooding the theater with ebony. Bowser shot one last sly grin at me knowingly before he moved back into his seat. Still flustered, I all but zoned in on the show. The dark blue curtains pulled back as the stage lighting grew bright and I grinned when I saw Ludwig walk across the stage. An applause rose from the crowd as he bowed and took his seat at the grand piano.

I gripped Bowsers arm, "This is so _cool! _We're going to watch him play! I know a musical genius!"

Bowser laughed, "You're really excited, aren't you?"

A soft, beautiful melody began to fill the auditorium and the stage lighting slowly bled to a soft yellow. I watched, entranced as Ludwig skillfully played the beautiful piano. Eyes closed and face calm, it was amazing to watch his deft claws slide over the keys with an elegant grace.

It all seemed effortless with how he performed. During the concert I realized the lighting changed to reflect the musical melody. The stage spotlight faded into a deep blue, mirroring the beautiful music as the tempo became melancholic. Then the musical tempo shifted fluidly, rising to a furious, almost wild crescendo and suddenly Ludwig was on his feet, pounding away feverishly at the keys as the stage lighting flamed an aggressive shade of red.

As the melody of the music shifted and melted from one song and into the next sinuously, Ludwig's passion was reflected everywhere; in his face, his eyes, his posture. This was really wonderful. Ludwig was amazing.

"Your son is talented," I whispered to Bowser with awe.

"Yeah," Bowser nodded his head, "Ludwig could play the piano even before he could walk."

I laughed, "I guess he was born to be great."

"Yeah…" he replied back softly.

I suppose time must have flown by because with the final dramatic crescendo, Ludwig finished and everything went dark. There was silence and soon the auditorium was filled with roaring clamor and loud cheer. I stood up, clapping and grinning largely. There were loud whistles, and even audience members with wet eyes.

"_Magnifico!" _

_"Bravo! Bravo!"_

_"Beautiful!"_

The stage lighting came back on and I saw Ludwig bow, as roses and other flora were thrown onto the stage. He grinned largely, truly content as he waved and walked offstage. It wasn't more than a second later when someone gently shoved him back into the limelight and Ludwig laughed heartily as he returned to stand in the middle of the stage.

_"Ladies and Gentlemen, Ludwig Von Koopa!"_

I looked up at Bowser and saw he was clapping, smirking a bit. I hugged him, "Congrats Dad, you've raised an amazing son!"

He laughed back, "A musical genius huh? Not bad eh Flower?"

That night he received a standing ovation lasting ten minutes after his performance. He stood on the stage laughing, unsure of what to do with himself for ten minutes and somehow I felt that Bowser understood his son a bit better. I may not understand music but I can recognize true brilliance when I see it and Ludwig was radiating with it.

* * *

><p>"This way, right?"<p>

A valet lead us backstage, "Maestro Ludwig Von Koopa is present. May you enjoy your evening."

"Thanks."

I wrapped my knuckles against the door and moments later there was a soft, "Enter."

I pushed the door open and smiled. The production staff was huddled around in a group, toasting each other with wine flutes filled with bubbling cider. Morton was too hard to miss in a sea of tiny koopa troopas. The moment he spotted us he grinned, waving at us.

"King Dad! Miss Daisy! Please come in and celebrate with us!"

"You expect _me _to use _that? _I'm going to break this damn thing," Bowser growled, "Got any goblets around here?"

"Of course your lordship, if you will accompany me, we'll find one that's erm… 'manly' enough for you."

I was handed a delicate flute and Bowser stared at his, offended, before following after a koopa. I took a sip and was glad it was nonalcoholic; even a small amount of koopa wine was enough to get me tipsy, "Where's the man of the hour?"

Morton was drinking from his glass, "Eldest brother is around somewhere."

"Thank the Stars it's not koopa wine," I laughed.

"Cannot hold your liquor well, princess?"

I spun around to see Ludwig, who was calmly sipping his drink. He arched an eyebrow in a rather debonair fashion. I beamed at him, "Well hey there music maestro! Congratulations! I saw your performance and it was beautiful!"

Ludwig appeared surprised, "Forgive my candor but I did not know you were attending. I could have promptly had V.I.P. arrangements made and—"

"It was a secret," I grinned, "I'm really impressed, you were amazing out there. Oh here, I bought these for you."

I handed him the bouquet of roses I purchased earlier and enjoyed his unhidden stupor. Ludwig looked absolutely floored! He glanced at the flowers then back at me, "You…purchased these for me?"

"Its tradition isn't it?" I smiled, nudging him in the chest, "Besides I think you deserved them."

The blue-haired prodigy brought the roses up to his nose and closed his eyes, "Thank you, they smell amazing. I've…never received a bouquet from a friend before. Perhaps I should have them pressed..."

Morton hummed thoughtfully, "But Ludwig I thought you hated flowers? You said they were completely useless."

Ludwig harrumphed, "These are…a bit more special I suppose. And who am I to turn away a gift? It would be poor etiquette to refute a present."

He looked at me and although he didn't smile, his eyes seemed warmer, "Thank you Princess, I shall value these flowers."

"You're welcome, Prince."

"Well now that I have a _proper _mug, let's toast!" I heard Bowser's voice before I saw him. I felt a heavy hand rest on my shoulder and figured the king was by my side. Ludwig blinked dumbly at his father's sudden appearance, "Here's to Prince Ludwig! A true musical genius!"

"To Prince Ludwig!" The others chorused and with the clinking of glasses, we drank.

While I drained my own beverage, I noticed something a bit odd. Ludwig didn't toast, he was staring vacuously at his father. No emotion passed through the prince's blue eyes. Bowser chugged his drink and smirked as he wiped the froth from his mouth. He finally realized Ludwig was looking at him.

"You've decided to attend…a concert of mine?" Somehow that didn't sound like a question. Ludwig's voice was completely monotone.

Bowser grinned in a way that was supposedly easygoing but I noticed the way his eyes narrowed and his muscles tensed, "Yeah. I've been told my son's a musical genius and decided to see my son's concert for myself."

"You've been 'told' I'm a musical genius, is that so?" Ludwig laughed darkly, no true humor in his voice, "I've been performing recitals for at least ten years of my life. Why didn't you come to any of those, King_ Father?_ "

The koopa king grinned larger, sharp incisors in full view, "_Son, _you know how inflexible my schedule is. I came to see this performance."

"I wonder why," Ludwig replied in a light tone, taking a measured sip from his flute, "It's not to impress the princess is it? That would be rather silly, don't you think? Pretending to suddenly inherit an air of class would be a bit preposterous, Father."

This time the smile drained entirely from Bowser's face; oh _sheyt._ Mario once told me that the moment Bowser stopped smiling, asses began to fry. Even Morton, who had been happily eating hors d'oeuvres now watched the exchange cautiously.

"Let us settle down now, yes?" Morton tried to placate the two glaring koopas, "Ooh? Look at this! Tiny koopa carrot cake! Delicious…?Would you like some Miss Daisy? They are quite appeasing!"

"Um…Yes?" I asked unsurely.

Bowser sneered, "Well, I came to _this _recital because _I _wanted to."

Oh boy, the diversion is not working.

"It was King Bowser's idea to attend, Ludwig," I spoke softly.

"_See?"_ Bowser sounded victorious, "It was my idea."

I think the prince ignored me, "Did you manage to stay awake the entire time, King Father? I know learning culture is such a _bore _for you."

I noticed the mug in Bowser's hand had been crushed, "Maybe you should appreciate how we came here in the first place _Ludwig."_

I realized the feuding royal family was starting to receive attention; the staff was starting to fall quiet and everyone in the room was turning to watch the commotion. I have to stop this before it gets out of hand.

"Bowser…" I whispered, tugging on the king's arm, "That's enough…"

"Bowser? Ha! Well _what a surprise! _A loud, obnoxious voice! Stars wouldn't I know that voice from anywhere."

The new voice sounded female and I certainly haven't heard it before. I followed Bowser and Ludwig's lead and turned to see who the new voice belonged to. Standing behind them was an attractive koopa woman with blue hair and jade eyes. Bowser looked as if he had seen a ghost, as Ludwig looked undisturbed.

The well-dressed koopa woman approached our group with a confident hip-swaying saunter. She stepped beside Ludwig and suggestively ran her bottle green eyes over the length of Bowser's form, "Well…You still look good, _Milord._"

She laughed mirthfully as the surprise faded from Bowser's expression. I was stunned; was this koopette his ex-wife? Bowser's expression became hard, "What are you doing here?"

"What?" she grinned, "Unlike _you_, I actually _attend_ my nephew's recitals regularly."

"She's right," Ludwig replied, "Aunt is a usual at my performances."

_And you're not _is what he should have added but I think it was already implied in his speech. The koopa woman turned to look at me and sneered, "Stars, please tell me I'm not seeing what I am. Did you _really _bring a human woman as your date?"

"Aunt…" Ludwig frowned.

"So after Clawdia, _this _is what you're with these days?" she laughed, "Bowser when you're not running your damn mouth you're actually an attractive koopa, you could do _so _much better. Things must be bad if you're going around with this _feosaura."_

"Say that again," Bowser's tone was so venomous, even the Koopa woman looked timid for a change, "And I promise you, chivalry won't stop me from ripping into you."

"That's quite enough Talon," a smooth, honeyed voice replied, "We're here to see a concert not cause a scene."

Standing at the door was an even more stunning koopa woman. Like Ludwig she had dark blue hair that was styled into an elegant bun and enviable jewel-blue eyes that seemed unnatural. Somehow I knew, _this _was Bowser's ex-wife. And the ex-queen of the Darklands was heartbreakingly beautiful.

"M-Mother," Ludwig breathed, eyes wide.

"Mom…" Morton whispered.

"I think anyone who isn't related to us should leave," Ludwig spoke softly, yet everyone heard him.

Just as the crowd was starting to leave, I turned to follow them all out. A heavy palm gripped my shoulder and I turned to see Bowser staring at me. His eyes were borderline orange in color and seemed wild somehow, "No. You stay here."

_I need you._

"Okay," I squeezed his hand.

_I'm here for you._

I turned to look at Clawdia, whose face was perfectly neutral even while her ex-husband glared ruthlessly at her. This was so unfair, it was clear Bowser was struggling, inner turmoil raging and yet his ex-wife seemed perfectly at ease.

"How dare you show up here," Bowser growled, "Who the hell do you think you are? I said I _never _wanted to see your face again."

"Well," Clawdia didn't bat an eyelash, "as stated by my son, you never show up to his recitals and I didn't think I'd see you here, your Lordship."

Bowser managed to both glare and gape incredulously at her, "You attend _my _son's recitals?"

"I am the young koopa's mother after all," she dusted an invisible particle from her expensive dress, "So I am allowed to see my children."

Bowser laughed darkly, "Oh I get it. So now that Ludwig's a successful musician, you suddenly _care _for him. What about Wendy who last saw you six years ago? Or the twins? Or Junior who's _never _seen his mother's pretty face? What about your _non-famous _children huh? The ones who can't write symphonies at the age of six."

"No matter what spin you want to put on this Bowser," her voice still remained cool, "I have been coming to see Ludwig's performances. And let's entertain the idea that I do 'suddenly care' for him but quite frankly you've never cared for him."

Bowser snarled as he stomped towards her. I grabbed his arm and to avoid dragging me, he stopped in his tracks. I don't think that was missed by Clawdia, who looked a bit surprised. Bowser's narrowed red eyes sharpened, "You know what? The _only _good thing you did was have my offspring."

Clawdia smirked coldly, "I'm surprised, since I know you enjoyed the sex while it lasted."

_Say whaaaat?_

If this situation wasn't so serious, I probably would have laughed garishly at the complete mortification and surprise upon Ludwig's and Morton's faces. It's a proven truth people: kids _never _want to know any details about their parents' sex lives. If I find out _anything_ about my father and mother, I'll end it right here and right now.

Bowser grinned insidiously at her, "You're right. You were good for two things; the birth of _my _children and being a good fu—"

_Oh great Flaming Stars in Star Haven!_

I gasped, face going dark red as I hurriedly slapped my hands over Morton and Ludwig's ears; I clunked their heads together and covered their outermost ear. Even though Clawdia's face remained perfectly straight, her cheeks did turn just the slightest shade of pink.

Bowser was honestly laughing, "Oh Stars. You remember that one time you did that tongue thing? You know, with whipped cream and—"

With each story he _told _my face grew redder and redder. And surprisingly even Clawdia's sister laughed at his lewd stories; thank the Stars these two princes aren't hearing Bowser's vulgarity. The things he was telling were so _crazy_ and crude_;_ I could only gape in abject horror. Ludwig only blinked while Morton closed his eyes and probably went to his 'happy place.'

By the time Bowser was done, he was laughing hard while Clawdia remained stone-faced; her cheeks were a dark shade of red. Bowser grinned down at her, "_Yup. _You _so_ played me woman."

"No matter what humiliations you try to put me through," she finally had an edge to her voice, "I—"

"Humiliations _I _put _you _through?" he smirked, "Let's be honest Clawd, _you _put _me _through those 'humiliations' and quite frankly I enjoyed them all."

"I will see my son," she growled, smoke curling from her pretty mouth, "My children and you will not stop me. Regardless of your piteous attitude I am still their mother."

For the first time she looked at me. The hostility drained from her features as we met eyes. A part of me wanted to hate her for being so perfect, so pretty but I couldn't. This wasn't my battle to fight and even as she stared at me, there was no sign of anger or any emotion on her beautiful face.

When she left her marriage with Bowser, she left with nothing whereas Bowser was _still _the reigning king, had droves of women willing to replace her and happily raised all her children. She was stripped of her title as queen and as a mother; she was the biggest loser here and something tells me she's smart enough to realize that.

With no other words she turned and left, a trail of dark purple satin flowing in her wake. The Aunt fled to the door, turned her nose up at us then left. Bowser's expression lightened when I patted his shoulder, "You…handled that well, I think."

Bowser's eyes sharpened predatorily and blazed that eerie bright orange hue, "Ludwig Von Koopa."

Ludwig's head snapped in his father's direction, "…Yes?"

"You know your mother and I don't get on, you of all people should know she's a conniving manipulator. She's abandoned your youngest brother without a second thought," the king's growl was so deep, I could barely understand him, "So you must answer me something…"

"I will," Ludwig replied.

"How long has she been attending your stupid recitals," his voice didn't raise a decibel, "How long has that _woman _been coming to see you perform?"

"Bowser," I frowned.

Ludwig's blue eyes reached subzero, "At least _she _takes an interest in my music."

"No," Bowser snarled, finally turning to look at Ludwig, "She's interested in you being _famous _and _rich._ You just happen to compose music."

"That's not true!" Ludwig growled his voice raising an octave.

"Morton, does your 'mother' ever speak to you?" Bowser asked.

The soft-hearted koopa peered at his feet reproachfully, "No…"

"Surprise, surprise. No contact with any of your not so famous siblings," Bowser growled, "Now you listen here; I don't want that woman coming anywhere near you or any of your siblings."

Ludwig looked torn, "But…"

"This is one thing you can't fight me on," Bowser growled, "That includes your Aunt too."

The blue-headed prince glared off at nothing, "…Then no one will see my recitals."

"I will go, if you want me too eldest brother," Morton smiled.

Ludwig chuckled humorlessly, shaking his head, "Thank you Morton but you must work as sound technician."

"I'll go," I replied, "So long as you give me an advanced notice. My Father and the Sarasaland council would be thrilled I was becoming 'cultured'."

The prince's blue eyes narrowed slightly, "You are…serious?"

"Sure," I smiled, "I'll go Ludwig. I wasn't kidding when I said I liked your music."

His expression became soft, "…Thank you Princess. I shall hold you to your word."

I chuckled, waving a careless hand through the air, "Please call me 'Mama Daisy' like the rest of your siblings."

"Hmm," was his only reply to that. His blue eyes narrowed as he took me in slowly.

"Oh! Oh!" Morton began jumping around, shaking the foundation of the building, "May I call you 'Mama Daisy?'"

"Sure!" I grinned.

* * *

><p>"We're all heading back to the same castle," Bowser chuckled, "So we might as well all go back together."<p>

"I'll pass," Ludwig said bluntly.

"Oh no you're not," I said simply; I was not going to let them get into another heated argument, "We're all going to squeeze into the clown car together. And you're gonna like it!"

"There's no way we're all going to fit," Ludwig scrunched up his face, "Even if possible I don't want to be _rubbing_ up _against _my brother or father."

At his shudder, I laughed at the complete disgust smeared on his face. I placed a hand on his shoulder, "Fine then. Stand by me; I'm not too disgusting am I?" I winked at him.

My laughter grew louder at the surprising appearance of a pale pink blush crossing the usually composed prince's face. Bowser halted mid step and turned around to shoot the both of us an odd look. I was just about to ask him what was wrong when someone called my name.

"Daisy?"

Huh? You know, that voice sounded oddly like my cousin.

I spun around and in fact it was my cousin. There she was, Princess Peach in all her beauteous glory wearing a sparkling dark pink evening gown and her long hair in immaculate curls. She looked a bit surprised; dark pink lips pulled into an appealing 'o'.

"Peach!" I was surprised too, "Uh…hey?"

She clamored over, smiling sweetly, "I didn't know you enjoyed classical music! This is a bit odd…"

"Normally I don't but I decided to try something new."

"And look at you!" Peach stepped back, blue eyes glowing warmly, "You look smashing! Simply stunning!"

"Thank you. And you—well, when don't you look beautiful?"

Peach smiled warmly, "May I ask who accompanied you for the evening?" Her blue eyes narrowed mischievously, "I bet it was that handsome Ryu fellow wasn't it? Every time you call me, you tell me how amazingly wondrous his abdominals are."

I blushed, "_Peach!"_

As she tittered charmingly, there was a loud snarl. A long shadow loomed over the both of us and I realized Bowser was standing beside me. The look on his face was absolutely murderous. Peach gaped up at him wordlessly as he glared down at her, "Hi _Princess."_

He then shifted his glare to me, "So you think some _loser _has 'nice abdominals'? Well obviously you've got to see mine _again. _His muscles will look absolutely straight up _girly _compared to _mine. _Just you wait til I get you at the palace and—"

Peach shrieked loudly, her keening bell-like scream blasting my eardrums insto oblivion. Bowser, Ludwig and Morton all covered their ears, gritting their teeth at her maddening cry. Peach grabbed my hand and began to drag me away, "_Run! I-It's Bowser_!"

You know, Peach is pretty strong when she wants to be. She was actually running and pulling me with her passed the theater goers. I turned and looked at Bowser, who was staring at us with the most puzzled expression on his face.

"Peach its okay!" I called to her.

"Mario!" She cried out.

Huh? Mario? He's here?

And just like that, the red plumber appeared from the throng of citizens. He was dressed in a dark suit, iconic red hat gone for a change. He looked at the both of us and smiled, "Peach-a! There you are. I didn't-a know you came too-a Daisy. How are you?"

"Pretty good and you?"

"Good, good."

"Mario!" Peach grabbed her date by the crux of his suit. Mario stared at her wide-eyed as she continued to shake him, "B-B-Bowser's here!"

"Bowser?" Mario's skeptical look faded into a stern expression, "Where? Are-a you two okay?"

"Mario, I came here with—"

"It's okay-a," Mario nodded his head, "I'll take care of him-a."

I slapped a hand to my forehead. Why weren't these people listening to me?

And of course in perfect timing Bowser appeared, shoving his way through the crowd. His eyes landed on me before they spotted his eternal rival. Oh boy, things were about to get rough. Bowser's confusion transformed into anger instantaneously, "You!"

"Just go," Mario huffed, crossing his arms, "And I won't-a fight you."

"Not until Princess Daisy comes with me," Bowser growled brandishing a threatening fist.

_Give me the girl now or I shall punch you_, said his hostile posture.

By now the crowd had stepped back, forming a small circle around both of the legendary figures. The crowd murmured quietly as both of Peach's eyebrows rose curiously. She glanced at me for a second, then back at Bowser but Mario shook his head, "She-a stays with her cousin-a and me."

"Well," Bowser grinned, his hellish smile nearly split his face as he began to crack his knuckles ominously, "I've been wanting to punch you through a wall for a while now. I guess this gives me the opportunity to do it."

Mario got into a defensive stance as Bowser narrowed his eyes. Okay this was ridiculous; one I don't need Mario to fight my battles for me and two, I'm not even in danger or anything! I was surprised when I met the calculating gaze of my cousin.

"You…came with him, didn't you?" she spoke slowly, "As his date?"

"Yeah I did," I frowned at the showdown; they were walking in a circle, sizing each other up.

Peach fell silent for a moment, "Hmm. You're…friends with him."

I sighed, "Yes P, I am. I've been friends with him ever since we played soccer together. Anything else?"

"So he's not going to kidnap me anymore, is he?" She turned to look at the fight again, watching Mario duck a furious punch.

"I don't think so Peachykeen," I smiled at her and somewhere in the background, the ground shook violently and as Bowser grunted, Mario cheered, "Something tells me he won't bother you anymore."

"I see…" She tapped a silk-covered finger to her chin in thought. There was another loud boom and a loud guffaw from Bowser, "So then, we should probably stop this."

Peach gestured to the fight going on between Bowser and Mario. Already it had degenerated into 'your mother' jokes and punches and kicks being thrown. Bowser's fancy black shell was now scratched up and a few of his silver wristbands were broken where Mario's tuxedo was torn and ripped in a few places.

I looked at Peach, "Agreed but how do we…uh stop this?"

_"Did-a that hurt?"_

**_POW!_**

_"Nope. How about that short stack?"_

**_BAM!_**

_"Hoo! I'm-a gonna win!"_

**BOOM!**

_"I'm gonna beat you stupid, STUPID!"_

My blonde cousin grinned at me impishly, "Simple. I'll go get my man and you'll go get yours."

I laughed, "Okay deal."

I halted; wait _my man? _Peach walked over to be a bit closer to Mario as I walked to where Ludwig and Morton were. Both koopalings turned and looked down at me. Morton scratched his head, "Should we help King Dad to fight? I don't like to hurt people…"

"I'd rather not," Ludwig frowned, "Besides I think it'd hurt his pride if we 'helped' him."

"Don't worry," I smirked at them, "Peach and I got this."

Ludwig arched an eyebrow and Morton titled his head in confusion. I cleared my throat before I barked at him, "Bowser!"

"Oh Maaaaario," Peach sing-sang.

"Yes Peach?"

"Flower not now," Bowser growled, "I have to kick. His. Ass. I promise I'll smack him once for you."

"Machi," Peach chirruped sweetly, "Can you please stop this fight?"

Mario looked surprised and turned to look at Peach for a second, "What? But-a Peachy, he's trying'a to kidnap your-a cousin!"

"That's not the case at all," Peach was smiling, "Now come on, just stop the childish fighting."

I placed my hands on my hips and glared, "Bowser, if you don't stop this fight now. You'll be _sorry."_

Bowser snapped around to look at me, wide-eyed, "What? B-But it's Mario and I _must _kick his ass!"

I narrowed my eyes, "You've got 'til the count of three to stop this fight. One…"

Bowser growled, "But…But…!"

"Two," I raised my second finger.

The King Koopa snarled, blowing out smoke from his nostrils, "F-Fine…But if he sucker punches me, I'm slammin' his head through a wall."

Mario narrowed his eyes, "Sucker punch? Why I ought-a…"

"_Ahem_," Peach was still smiling but there was a threat looming behind that saccharine voice.

Mario huffed, also turning his face away from Bowser. It was strange that both of them were in the _exact _same pose; face turned away from the other and fists clenched. If I wasn't scolding a temperamental koopa king, I would have laughed at the scene.

"Mario," Peach's voice was clear like a bell as she stepped beside him. She placed a dainty hand on his shoulder, "We should apologize to King Bowser. I made a mistake and thought he was trying to kidnap my cousin and I. But as you can see, they too came to see the magnificent Ludwig Von Koopa perform."

Peach smiled beautifully at Ludwig before she glanced down at the Italian plumber, "Now what should you do…?"

"I…I'm-a sorry King Bowser," Mario grumbled, cheeks turning a soft shade of red.

Bowser grinned down at the plumber with an insanely happy grin; he was probably enjoying his legendary foe being manhandled by Princess Peach. I chuckled, deciding to take that ego down a few notches. I nudged the king koopa in the shoulder.

"Well, you got anything to say?"

Bowser snorted, "Yeah I do. It's clear who wears the pants in this relationship," he laughed, narrowing his eyes with wicked glee, "Say Princess Peach, do you tell him when to take his naps too? I—"

His eyes grew wide as his sentence died away in a choking gurgle. Mario was glaring at Bowser—ego aching as the rest of the crowd watched. I smirked at Bowser, "Now what are you going to say?"

What everyone didn't realize, was that I had discreetly grabbed a hold of his tail and was squeezing it. Bowser looked flustered, "Uh…S-Sorry loserface—_UGH_! I mean you ugly plumber bast—_ARGH_! Is this really necessary Flo—_Ack!_"

Again, I must reiterate I was squeezing his tail every time he said something negative. He gazed down at me and I glanced up at him, a snide smirk on my face. Bowser finally whispered, "Yeah uh…s-sorry Mario…"

Peach cleared her throat and that must have been a signal for Mario as he whispered back, "N-No problem King Bowser…"

"Great!" Peach clapped her hands happily, "We shall get going back to the Mushroom Kingdom now. Have a good evening Daisy, King Bowser."

I let go of the King's tail and hugged Peach. After I waved to Mario, we turned and went our separate ways. Ludwig and Morton were ahead of us, talking amongst each other and Bowser was dead silent the entire way.

I looked up at him and smirked, "What's up with you King Bowser."

"Uh…" He coughed into his knuckles, "R-Remember when we were on the rooftop and…talked about those things…we shouldn't do?"

My eyes grew wide, "Oh Stars, I didn't do something completely inappropriate didn't I? It was the tail thing wasn't it?"

He chuckled, "Well besides _completely _turning me on, not really."

I flushed dark red as he laughed. Again I noticed his eyes were a darker shade of red, like a candy apple red. He placed a claw on my shoulder and grinned at me, "If you wanted to feel me up, you could have just asked. Quite frankly I would have enjoyed it _more _in a secluded setting—"

"_Bowser!" _I growled between my teeth, red-faced, "I-I didn't mean to!"

"You were excessively violent and demanding," he looked pleased, "I _like _that. It's also kinda kinky you tried that in front of my kids too."

I marched off faster the second I heard his loud guffaws of laughter. Moments later two thick arms wrapped around my middle and nestled me comfortably against his plastron. Still smiling, he rolled his eyes, "_Fine. _I'll stop now."

"Ludwig and Morton have been waiting at the clown copter for awhile now, slowpoke," I huffed.

"Those kids can wait a moment more."

I closed my eyes, sighing softly.

"Hey Flower?"

"What's up?"

"…You think you can do that tail thing again? I promise I—Oh! _Ow! My mane! Let go you violent woman!"_

* * *

><p>Alice: Hope you enjoyed! :3 Leave a review? ^_^ Also if you want the next chapter to be a Q &amp; A session, also leave your question(s) or if you want a funny side story, I'll do that too! (blows a kiss)<p> 


	18. Darkland: Tea with the King

Alice: Helloooooo! I just wanted to get this chapter up A-S-A-P! The Q and A will be included later. So you can ask more questions if you'd like. ^_^

Ultrra: We're keeping this author note short and sweet?

Alice: (Nods head) Yeeeees. So I hope you all read, review and—

Ultrra: Hey!

Alice:…Yes?

Ultrra: At the end of the chapter I never do anything! I'm only here for the author note! (frowns)

Alice: (blinks) You…wanna do the ending author note? The one at the end of the chapter…?

Ultrra: Yeah but I had to practically BEG.

Alice: Lol! Geesh, fine do the ending! XD

Ultrra: And it'll be the BEST ending note. EVER.

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoO**

* * *

><p>I'm going to go out on a limb here and say I was having a bad day. I spent most of last night restless, staring vacantly at the ceiling and trying to coax an overactive mind into repose. And earlier this morning I moved through my itinerary like a zombie stuck in molasses.<p>

So what's the matter? Why am I, the usually upbeat princess in such a slump?

Because today I was going to choose candidates to be my husband.

My _Husband._

It seemed like no matter how slowly I moved through the day, this was still inevitable. I was stuck in a dark tunnel, mind reeling as the impending train drew ever closer and closer, the light of reality blinding and harsh.

So here I sat in my room, flipping through a scrapbook of all my potential suitors. While the pages were filled with photos of smiling faces and a plethora of information, I couldn't find the willpower to focus on the print.

_You can do this._

Maybe last night's lack of sleep was finally catching up to me. Or maybe my nerves were driving me up the proverbial wall. My stomach was knotting up; palms sweaty and gaze unfocused.

_You can do this. Just go with what you know. _This was a book filled with hundreds of interested, eligible royal men. I only knew two of them. So I know I would choose Lulu and Ryu. But that left me two more choices…

_Bowser and who else?_

I ripped through pages and landed on a random royal. The guy's name was Wolfesbane and he had an easy going smile. I guess he could be my last choice. But how would Father and the council respond when I announced Bowser as one of my choices? Even after his presence at my _Sumanni_ and as Sarasaland's newest ally, anti-Koopa sentiment was very high.

I already knew there would be an outcry when I announced him as one of my potential choices but it was better to have him there than some random prince. The council would choose three men and I would chose four. With a sigh, I closed the book and rose to my feet. I opened my door and let Lady Angora and a few other beauticians in.

As usual the sharp-eyed, sharp-clawed Lady Angora hovered nearby as she oversaw my beautification process. If I was to see the 'glorious' council then I must look sophisticated and elegant. By the process's end, I glanced at myself in the vanity.

Large doll-like eyes were vacant behind a face of rouged cheeks and reddened lips. Foundation had been applied to my face to make my dusky complexion appear milky and my usually thick hair was fixed to be unnaturally bone straight.

Even though I stared at my reflection, she didn't look like me at all. Behind me Angora's wintry presence lingered. The edges of her sharp, blood-red lips quirked in a grin, "You look fine today milady. Like a true princess."

"Thanks," I whispered.

I was going to see the Sarasaland clan elders, a group of pretentious old men who had nothing better to do than meddle in the lives of others. Especially if these said lives were those of Sarasalandian royalty.

The only silver lining to this cloud was that my grandmother would be present. I stood outside a large oak door, staring vacuously through the beautiful finish. Inside that door was my future. I took a deep breath.

Somewhere in my head I heard Bowser's voice, strong and confident, "_You know what always works for me Flower? Hold your head up, throw your shoulders back and strut like you own the place_."

I rolled my shoulders back, held my head high and walked into the debate room. The second I entered, the esteemed council rose to their feet in one fluid motion. As was Sarasalandian tradition the council sat in tall, elevated podiums. I felt as if I were being put on trial; actually maybe I was.

At the highest positions were my Father and grandmother. Father's face was set in its perfect stoic countenance as Grammy beamed down at me and waved. The elite council was composed of nothing but wealthy old men, with the majority of them being older than even my Father. They were all from well to do families and had some sort of successful businesses in their name.

I never understood these men; they served as one of the most powerful councils in Sarasaland and yet they truly did not understand the people they obliged. They had never lived in the cities that requested funds for new wells and had never walked through the bazaars and plazas that the 'commoners' have.

In their presence I stood straight; I truly detested these old men. I didn't hold a single fond memory of them; they had always been unsavory to me. I kept a straight face under the presence of these awful men. Their old, wrinkled faces were perfectly blank as they stared down at me.

"Welcome Princess Sarasaland," Mr. Puffs spoke, the boo materialized from thin air as he set spectacles upon his face, "We will now begin the meeting."

"Princess Sarasaland," I heard Father's deep voice carry across the room, "The council and I are pleased to have a consensus of who we have chosen for your suitors."

"I understand your majesty," I spoke softly.

"Well met," Father nodded his head, "For our first choice, we have chosen Prince Silver of the Moonstone Kingdom."

Mentally I began to tick off why the council would choose the suitors they did. The Moonstone kingdom was infamous for its scientific brilliance and phenomenal medical breakthroughs. Perhaps through contracting a marriage with the Moonstone prince, Sarasaland would be able to access their medicinal benefits.

"Next we have chosen Prince Taurus of the Aqualand kingdom."

I barely suppressed a sneer at the sound of that prince's name. Ugh, even now I could still envision his serpentine silver eyes framed by a conceited face. That jerk was one of the few men at my _Sumanni _I couldn't stand. He had been arrogant and so full of himself I even wondered why he even needed me in the first place.

Yet again I understood the benefits of a marriage with a prince from the Aqualands; the Aqualands was surrounded by a surplus of water and as we were Desert people, we needed all the water we could get.

An alliance and a marriage with the Aqualands would ensure Sarasaland's grand water needs would be more than met. I shivered at the thought of having to be anywhere near that pompous prick again. I looked at Father who was reviewing his notes.

"And for our final bachelor we have chosen our senior councilor's very own son."

The old councilors quietly congratulated the elder councilor Salini, who was perhaps the most vile of them all. Salini sat tall in his seat, poorly containing the smug superiority radiating from his person. I'm more than sure I had 'rubbed elbows' with the children of the councilors at one point or another.

And I had detested them all.

For a good amount of my childhood I had been playmates with the children and grandchildren of the councilors and it seemed that along with cruel ridicule, the children had been trying to leech any kind of precious information from me.

They were the first children I had played with outside of Peach. They had been spiteful, calling me all kinds of names. It was truly because of them I had developed my tough skin. And the thought of potentially marrying one of those brats was enough to make me want to hurl, eat the half-digested food again, and then hurl it up again.

Sorry for the gruesome imagery but it was _that _bad.

"And now that we have taken care of that affair," Father continued, "We shall now hear the princess's four chosen suitors."

While Father's face was perfectly straight, his eyes glowed with the light of victory. All at once the councilmen looked up, stunned. Salini of all people spoke, "Beg your pardon your lordship but did you say, 'the princess's choice'?"

He didn't bat a single eyelash, "That is correct."

"We have chosen three perfectly fine suitors for her ladyship," another councilor spoke up, "The addition of more suitors is simply not needed or wanted."

Not wanted? Were these councilors really thinking I would choose a suitor solely from their candidates!? How utterly arrogant of them.

"While the input of the council is invaluable," Father started, "one of the many measures of Sarasaland protocol that I am proud of is the reigning monarch's ability to choose their fiancé. I do not think it is too much to ask for the Princess to choose a couple of suitors of her own."

"With all due respect Emperor," Salini spoke, "But the princess is _not _the reigning monarch. She will be the day she is coronated."

"But the princess is young," one of the men spoke, shaking his head, "She would choose a suitor based upon the wrong merits."

"She will not know what is best."

"Hormones are a young woman's worst enemy. A hysterical young woman should not have the ability to choose."

A soft chorus of chuckles filled the air as I flushed at the insult. However the moment displeasure crossed Father's features, their laughter died away, "Councilor Raymus, you are beginning to test my patience. You shall do well for yourself to never insult the crown princess in my presence again."

"F-Forgive me your lordship! I did not mean to slight the princess I—"

"Very well then. Apologize to the _princess _and all shall be well," I swear Father's eyes glowed darkly; as if he were truly enjoying himself right now.

The councilor Raymus's lips twitched, as if trying to poorly hide his disdain at the idea of apologizing to me. He turned towards me and his eyes were dark.

"Forgive me princess," his voice was perfectly flat, "I forgot myself."

"You're forgiven," and just to piss him off even further, I smiled beautifully and added, "Thank you."

"Then perhaps we shall hear the…princess's choice of suitors," Salini spoke, a slight sneer disguised as a smile, "Princess?"

I cleared my throat before I spoke, "Yes, I have elected four fine, eligible suitors. The first I have chosen is the clan leader Ryu of the Hidden Lotus village."

Murmurs of condemnation met my choice. The council men muttered disparagingly, wondering about the benefits Sarasaland could receive from uniting with such a small village.

"Have any of you gentlemen heard of the Hidden Lotus village?"

"I do not know them."

"Ah yes," Salini smirked, "I have heard of them. They do not allow outsiders upon their grounds. They are a small, skilled shinobi village. No one truly knows the exact location of their village, thus 'the Hidden Lotus Village.' Intriguing choice princess."

"What do we stand to gain of them?"

"Ryu of the Hidden Lotus Village? I've heard he is quite the warrior."

"Would our citizenry be able to learn their hidden techniques I wonder…?"

"My third choice is a man by the name of Wolfsbane. He comes from Land's End," This guy I had chosen randomly. No rhyme or reason to it.

"The people of Land's End are savages," One member whispered.

"They are far beneath us…"

"We should be happy they walk upright," Salini chuckled.

I raised a hand to silence the men. Yet again I was almost unnerved by the amount of hostility my action received. Any woman who showed any kind of authority in their presence was already on their bad list. And really ever since I was a child, I've been on that list.

I was more than happy to tell the council that my next choice was Luigi, one half of the heroic duo. He may not have been superstar status like his brother but any kingdom would happily accept him with open arms.

"I would like to state my next choice," I began, "we all are very familiar with my second suitor, the hero Luigi Mario."

I was floored with the sheer amount of disapproval I received; I was surprised. Surely they would not mind their princess marrying a renowned hero? What was going on here? They didn't like…Luigi?

"You have chosen a commoner? A man without royal blood?" One of the councilors said skeptically.

"While he is a hero…we cannot simply ignore centuries of protocol for one man. Royalty must marry royalty, you know that princess."

"Perhaps if the man had been the _Mario_, then we could make an exception."

I tightened my lips into a firm line; I could see what was going to happen here: no matter who I said they were just going to disapprove simply because it was _my _choice. Well then if they didn't like Ryu and Luigi of all people then what fear did I have of hearing their disapproval when I mentioned Bowser as my final choice?

In fact maybe I could enjoy this a bit. Just the pure amount of shock on their old, wrinkled faces would be worth this entire ordeal. I flipped my bangs out of my face, "Very well then. I shall tell you all my final choice. This new ally of Sarasaland has been piquing my interest. He rules over one of the wealthiest kingdoms in our nation, has the richest economy and has one of the strongest militaries."

The council perked up at the sound of such an amazing suitor. In fact half of them appeared surprised as the other half looked suspicious, as if such a man could not exist because he was so prime. It took all of my strength not to bust out laughing at the questioning glares upon their faces. I noticed how even Father and Grammy were alert and interested now.

"And who pray tell is this amazing suitor you have in mind," Salini spoke through his teeth, "Surely I would know of such a ruler if he existed."

Now I allowed the smirk to unfurl upon my lips; perhaps just through saying his name I was channeling Bowser's aura.

"My final suitor is King Bowser."

The room fell silent for a moment, jaws gaping inelegantly. And then the next moment all chaos broke loose. Councilmen rose to their feet shouting and yelling rancorously. I was stunned and looked at Father's reaction to this. Even the composed Emperor Sakuro was astonished at their outburst.

Then his mask was back in place as he calmly rose to his feet. Even Grammy rose to her feet, frowning a bit. Father took a gavel and slammed it into the podium. The furious cries were slowly silenced when they saw their emperor standing.

"Take your seats," Father didn't bother to hide the acerbic edge to his words.

The council slowly sat down one by one. And I honestly wasn't surprised that Salini was the last of them to his chair.

It seemed as if they had made him their pack leader. Father's eyes slanted as he spoke, "While I too am stunned at the princess's final choice, I will not allow such a debacle to occur like that again. This woman standing before you all is the crown princess of Sarasaland and not some woman working at the bazaar. You shall speak to her in the appropriate manner."

"Your majesty—"

"Your level of disrespect is one I shall not tolerate. This is a warning to each of you. Try me again and you shall regret it deeply. For this insurrection you all will receive a salary reduction."

"We understand your majesty but how can we forget that her last suitor is…" the man choked, "King Bowser!? He is a Koopa!"

"And your point is…?" Father arched an eyebrow.

"Lord Bowser is evil!" another man cut in, "He is hailed as a demon king! Do we want our kingdom to be aligned with such evil!?"

"The princess is not marrying the Koopa," Father said shaking his head, "she simply has enlisted him as one of her suitors."

"But how do we know our princess will be safe with him…?"

"Such childish bickering among an elite council is unbecoming," Grammy smiled, "I shall judge the Koopa king for myself."

All heads turned to my grandmother. For the entire meeting she had sat quietly, observing everything with keen eyes. She had seen enough and decided to step in. Even though she had injected her statement coupled with a melting smile, her word held the gravity of an atomic bomb.

"Y-Your ladyship?"

"This matter shall be resolved with our kingdom's beguiling poise and charm. I shall invite Lord Bowser for an afternoon of tea and pastries," grandmother continued her speech, eyes sparkling nearly as brightly as the sapphires in her silver crown, "It's undisputed of how fine a judge of character I am."

"But your greatness," one of the councilors sounded defeated, as if he knew arguing with Grammy would be pointless, "King Bowser is vile. He is a tyrannical warmonger. And inviting him to our castle would be disastrous."

Humming, Grammy tapped a manicured nail to her chin, "Oh I don't know about all that now. In recent months he has become one of our fair kingdom's largest allies. And if I recall correctly he was an honored guest at our lovely princess's _Sumanni_."

Grammy interlaced her fingers as she continued to kill the council with an enviable poise, "The other monarchs who had the pleasure of meeting him were taken with him. All night they had been singing his praises, thanking Sarasaland for allowing them the opportunity to meet King Bowser."

"But…" the councilor whimpered weakly.

"So," Grammy raised her manicured index finger, "perhaps you were right, that King Bowser is known for his inherently evil ways. However it seems in the past few months he has turned over a new leaf. The only way to be sure of this is to observe the Koopa. And who is better at reading others than I?"

"…No one, my Queen."

Grammy turned to look at me and smiled, "I deem that Princess Sarasaland and I shall have a nice afternoon tea alongside of King Bowser and I shall see if he is worthy to be a suitor for my dear granddaughter."

Smiling warmly, I curtsied to my grandmother, "Thank you Queen Meringue."

Grammy winked at me. With a twirl of the gavel, she dismissed the meeting and I happily floated from the room.

* * *

><p>"Great Stars it's hot out here! I remember when I was your age I would tan out here all day."<p>

The last of the servants were finishing up, placing the flagrant teas and pastries upon the table for our light luncheon. Once everything was to our liking, the servants bowed and took their leave. Grandmother and I were stationed on a beautiful wooden pagoda within the Grand palace's royal white sand garden.

The sand garden was only used to showcase our opulence; Father invited guests here for meetings and commerce business, I also know Lady Angora held tea parties for foreign court ladies when their husbands were here to meet with Father.

As Grammy spoke to one of the retreating servants, I drank in the view of the beautiful garden; the pagoda we stood on was at an apex, allowing us to have a nice view over the golden sands of our kingdom. The elegant white sand itself had been groomed into many different shapes from swirls to half-moon crescents and to travel through the sand gardens, one had to take the curved, elegant pathway.

Winding bonsais and large smooth river stones were littered throughout the garden. I looked over at Grammy and smiled; even though we were safely protected with a sturdy roof, my old-fashioned grandmother still wore a large floppy sunhat that was decorated with a large flower.

I was dressed in a long, cream-colored gown that was a lighter version of my usual golden dress, only instead of the orange accents they were replaced with a glinting gold. My customary aquiline earrings and brooch were replaced with shimmering golden jewelry that Lady Angora said would 'dare to dazzle the illustrious Koopa king'.

Lipstick always felt alien on my face but I suppose I had to roll with the punches on this one. Grandmother fanned herself with a matching lavender fan as I stared off into the horizon. There were no signs of Bowser yet.

"You don't think he got lost, do you Grammy?" I asked her.

Grammy looked over at me and grinned, "Why is my _Pichi_ anxious? You seem so antsy. You must really like this Koopa King…or you just drank too much water and have to go badly…"

I blushed a bit, "Oh Grammy I just want to hurry up and get this thing underway. Queen Meringue—"

"Bah," Grammy waved her gloved hand in a dismissal, "you know to call me Grammy when we're alone darling."

"Er, yes ma'am."

"So," her blue eyes twinkled as she held her fan coyly, "you're not excited to see King Koopa eh _Pichi_?"

"N-No! Of course not. I mean it will be a delight to see him yes but why would I be excited?"

"Uh huh," Grammy smirked, her rose lips quirking up into a knowing smile, "Oh look! Is that him dearie?"

I followed where Grammy had pointed and I turned. In the blue sky was an approaching spec. I could hear the familiar roar of the clown car's whizzing propellers. I grinned at the sight of the clown car's notorious smiling face; it was him! It was Bowser! I hurriedly straightened out my hair and patted invisible wrinkles from my dress.

"That's a pretty nifty car isn't it?" Grammy tittered, "Have you ever been in it before dear? It looks like a real good time if you ask me."

"I certainly have!" I beamed at her, "The ride is far smoother than what you would think it would be."

The moment Bowser was about to touchdown into the sands—a couple of servants shot him a dirty look, disgruntled at the thought of him ruining their hard handiwork—as Grammy and I rose to our feet. The treacherous desert winds picked up, a gust of hot wind spraying sand and pebble. I held onto my tiny grandmother's arm while Grammy was busy holding onto her large hat.

"Woo! Feels like a twister's about to hit out here!" Grammy yelled, laughing gaily.

"I know!" I shouted back to her.

The turbulent winds roared, sending a stream of sand whipping and a couple of the servants hid near the closest building. As I held onto Grammy, the hot winds sent a strong gale at us. I nearly fell over as Grammy continued to hoot and holler happily.

"Today would have been a great day for Sand surfing!" Grammy cooed.

"_Whoa!_"

The wild wind sent my dress aflutter in a flirtatious flurry of lacy petticoats and exposed knees. A stinging blaze of embarrassment burned my cheeks as I scrambled manically, clamping down to ensure my dress stayed in its proper place.

The soft sound of muffled laughter reached me; who would d_are _laugh at me? The muted titters came from my dear grandmother, whose eyes glowed brilliantly like the horizon of a sky. One petite hand muffled her laughter as she smiled, utterly amused at my situation.

My found myself even more flustered that my _Grandmother _found my exposure so funny. Disconcerted, I stammered unwelcomed babble, wondering how she could even find it amusing!

"Oh _Pichi_," Grammy smiled, the last of her laughter dying away, "I never knew you had such beautiful legs though. Whoever marries you will truly have a bride that is beautiful from head to toe."

"_Granna_!" I blushed, hissing through my teeth; remember I only spoke in Sarasalandian if I was emotionally compromised, "You think that's funny? Stars I must look like a floozy—"

"Settle down _Pichi_, I don't think anyone took any notice," ever relaxed, Grammy continued to fan herself with the regality worthy of the Sarasalandian empress, "The servants all ran for the hills and King Bowser hasn't left his ride yet. No unwelcomed eyes were rewarded with anything they shouldn't have."

I peered at the source of commotion and saw Grammy was right. The propeller was killed and Bowser hopped out of the clown car smoothly. He approached us, stomping over with an infectiously large grin.

With each footprint Bowser left in the sand garden, the servants visibly winced, watching helplessly as the soil they spent hours manicuring was being ruined. As the Koopa king walked past the tiny trees and stomped through the man-made creeks, I couldn't help but notice how foreign he seemed in our delicate sand gardens. He was almost as inelegant as a bull in a china shop.

The sinewy muscle in his arms flexed impressively with each step he took as the blazing sun set his mane afire in a vivid ruby radiance. The king's sharp horns shone under the sun's touch like elongated pearls. With each step he took closer, the more and more awing he was.

I stole a glance at Grammy, grinning at her stupor. She looked stunned, marveled at his majestic appearance. She was struck with the overwhelming height, musculature and power that was the essence of King Bowser, a force that demanded your complete attention.

"Oh _my~!_" Grammy beamed as Bowser's imposing form approached, "I forgot how _tall_ this young lad is! He's nothing but a wall of muscle! Truly magnificent specimen Koopa are eh?"

Chuckling, Grammy pulled me down to her level so she could whisper into my ear. The mischievous look on Bowser's face morphed into curiosity.

Aww, he wanted to know what we were saying about him!

"So this is the King of Koopas eh?" Grammy murmured, "I see why they made this powerhouse their king! I bet no one in their right mind would dare mess with his kingdom, especially with those arms of his. _Yikes_!"

"You better believe it," I chuckled, "I've seen him smash stones before! Luigi told me once Bowser was able to pull a small island!"

"Wow!" Grammy exclaimed and then 'whispered' to me, "_Whatta man!"_

When Bowser stood no more than ten feet before us, we both straightened up. A couple of servants lingered nearby, as if uneasy with the idea of the King of Koopas being alone with their royal ladies. Grammy must have noticed this because she looked at the hovering flock of servants and shooed them off. Hesitantly they left, casting last looks before going.

I was surprised when Bowser faced Grammy and gave a deep bow. He was a being of unparalleled power, strength and the rumored most powerful king alive, and yet he appeared humble. Bowing to an elder didn't seem like something the world's most powerful ruler was required to do.

"Good afternoon Ma'am, Princess Sarasaland," even the rumbling timbre of his voice seemed reverent.

I lifted the edges of my gown in a formal curtsy but Grammy coyly placed her hands on her hips and beamed approvingly, "Well hello there young Koopa! Would you care to join a couple of beautiful women for a cup of tea and pastries? You know, I have an available granddaughter…"

"Grandmother…" I blushed.

Bowser chuckled, sliding an all too amused glance in my direction, "Of course. But first I have a gift for you my Queen."

Grandmother's eyes brightened with unhidden glee as she happily clapped her hands together; she never could hide her pleasure at receiving gifts, "Oh? And what's that?"

A sharp grin formed as Bowser removed whatever he was hiding behind his shell and placed it into Grammy's gloved hands. Grammy's eyes glowed happily at the sight of…

"Spicy Koopa dumplings!" Grammy cooed happily, "My! I haven't had these babies in forever! They're so delicious!"

"Your grandmother told me at your Suma—suman—_your party_ how much she loved spicy Koopa dumplings," Bowser's sly grin hadn't left his face yet.

I bobbed my head approvingly, "I see. Makes sense."

"Well okay, you pass my test!" Grammy laughed, "You've buttered me up so now you can come and eat with us."

Both Bowser and I chuckled. Grammy leaned in and offered her arm to Bowser. She arched a charming eyebrow and grinned at him, "Would you escort a lady to her seat?"

"It'd be my pleasure."

Bowser's grin grew a bit softer as he carefully took my grandmother's arms within his. I was surprised at how delicately he was handling her, barely holding her as if her skin was made of glass. He even bent over quite a bit to accommodate her petite size as he walked at her slow, steady pace. When was the last time I've seen a man show so much care for an elder?

I smiled, truly impressed as I walked a bit behind them. So as I trailed behind them, Grammy was busy gesticulating grandly to flourish an outlandish story as Bowser chuckled at her large personality. We reached the luncheon table and Bowser set to task. He chivalrously pulled out a chair for grandmother and bowed with a flourish.

Grammy thanked him and affectionately patted his arm before slowly easing into the seat with the caution of an elder, mumbling something about 'old bones'. I walked to my own seat but before I could sit, I was lightly bumped out of the way by a hip. I blinked, realizing the lord of the Darklands had done so.

Smirking smugly, his red eyes were glinting, "I know you didn't think I forgot about you, Flower."

"But you were taking care of Grammy! I can pull the chair out myself."

"No one's disputing that but being the studly gentlemen I am, being bred with good manners is second nature. Now then," he pulled my chair out and bowed smoothly, "Milady."

Laughing I shook my head, "I can't believe you…but thank you anyways."

"That's right," Bowser grinned, "I'm forcing my manners down your throat and all you can do is accept it!"

We both laughed in loud chortles but as we did so, Grammy was very discreetly watching our interactions. I took the offered seat and felt Bowser push me towards the table. Before he left to take his seat, one of his hands clenched my shoulder.

But the other claw my grandmother couldn't see, lightly touched my hip. I gasped at the sensation and turned to look at him with a questioning glance. When Grammy looked away for a second, Bowser shot me a playful wink.

I felt the telltale heat rising to my face as I blushed. Bowser took a seat nearby and even though I purposefully ignored him, I could feel his all too obvious stare upon me. Ugh, what gives Bowwy? Did he not realize my _grandmother_ was at the table?

Just what kind of ideas was he trying to give her!? So for an all too long moment it went like this; I stared at my lap blushing and Bowser was just…_staring. _I can't even guess the look on Grammy's face.

"Well now," Grammy looked highly amused for some reason, "What type of tea would you like King Bowser? Maple delight or Honey Meringue? These are two of our kingdom's most popular teas."

"Hmm, well what do you suggest my Queen?" With Bowser's smile, his fangs glinted sharply.

"Maple delight is my favorite," Grammy chuckled, "The taste is mature, earthy and delicate but my granddaughter loves the creamy, buttery flavor of Honey Meringue."

"That settles it. Guess I'll take the Honey Meringue," Bowser grinned in my direction yet again.

_Huh?_ I halted in the middle of reaching for the tea kettle. I looked up at him and found he was still smiling that roguish grin of his that made my stomach turn flips. I looked away quickly, least he see me blush and grabbed the porcelain tea kettle.

In Sarasaland culture it was suitable for the young, unwed girl to serve her elders and esteemed guests, so I poured a cup for Grammy and poured another frothing cup of tea for Bowser and finished with bowing to them both.

I tried to ignore the _overt_ way Bowser _purposefully_ reached out to touch my hand as I served his porcelain. My face grew warm with blush as his notorious smirk surfaced yet again.

_I'm going to kill this Koopa! He's pulling out all the stops to fluster me in front of Grandmother! Argh!_

Once I finished serving grandmother and wasn't tied up with Bowser's stupidity, I poured a cup of Honey Meringue tea for myself and added a dollop of light crème for a subtle creamy, milky flavor. Grammy and Bowser drank their teas plain. I watched Bowser's reaction as he took his first sip. His eyebrows raised and he looked up at us with half a grin.

"Not bad!" he smirked, "not bad at all and I'm the kind of guy who hates teas unless I'm sick."

"You mean the great King Bowser gets sick like the rest of us mortals?" Grammy laughed, arching her manicured eyebrows charmingly, "Who'd have thought?"

"Well," Bowser grinned, "I only said it to make you feel better."

When the pastries arrived, it was also my role as a good Sarasalandian girl to serve the refreshments. I gently loaded three cream cinnamons onto Grammy's plate, two mélange tarts for myself and the rest of the basket onto Bower's plate. Amused, Grammy watched as Bowser happily scarfed them down, licking the thick cream off his claws and enjoying the savory taste.

While Bowser slurped down tea, I noticed Grammy barely touched her favorite pastries. She was busy telling stories to the king Koopa and I frowned. She was getting so frail and skinny, "Grammy, you know you must eat to keep your strength. You love cream cinnamons and yet you're not touching them…"

"Don't worry about me," Grammy smiled, waving a careless thin hand, "I'm just savoring the mélange tarts. So delightful they are."

Bowser remained unusually quiet as he listened to our banter. I frowned, "You took your medicine for your osteoporosis today? You know your bones hurt so bad some days…"

"Yes, yes, I took that osteo-whatchamacallit doohickey which tasted TERRIBLE by the way," she sniffled indignantly, cutting her cream cinnamons with a fork and knife, "It was like chewing chalk."

I frowned deeper, "Well maybe if you _weren't_ out last night trying to ride a sand-cycler…"

I heard a deep chortle from Bowser—either that or he just snorted up his tea through his nose, "Queen Meringue you ride sand-cyclers at your age?"

With a dramatic huff, Grammy grinned, "King Koopa, what these youngsters of today don't understand is that age is in the mentality of the person. Don't ever let it stop you."

"That's fine and all Grammy," I growled, "But when a doctor tells you to 'take it easy' I don't think that includes riding a sand motorcycle at high speeds!"

Bowser snapped his head to stare at grandmother incredulously as Grammy sipped her tea with an all too innocent expression. I was content to glare at her.

"So as a monarch of Sarasaland," Grammy smirked at the abrupt topic change and I narrowed my eyes, "I must ask how commerce is going. Is my little _Pichi _doing well as an envoy?"

I felt the color drain out of my face as I gaped dumbly; oh Stars I know my grandmother did _not_ use my childhood pet name right in front of Bowser. The King Koopa's head snapped up in sudden interest.

Mentally I was throwing my head back, screaming in girlish horror. While in the actual world, I was considering slamming my head against the table. Bowser still looked confused.

"Pee-chee?" Bowser arched an eyebrow, "Um, are you talking about princess Peach?"

"Oh no dear!" Grammy laughed, "_Pich _is a Sarasalandian word for 'little boy' but to feminize the nouns in our language we add either an 'I' or an 'A'. There is no true word _Pichi_ it is simply one I made up_."_

Bowser seemed far too interested in this, "So then why not just call her the word for little girl?"

"Grandmother…" I hissed, flushing to the roots of my hair.

"_Giya?_ Oh no 'cause _Pichi _comes off as a boyish girl. It's been my granddaughter's pet name ever since I carried her around in my arms as a sweet little baby! She was such a chubby, cute little baby! Drooling every time she giggled…"

"_Granna!_" I flushed hotly at the sound of Bowser's delighted laughter.

"What? That wasn't embarrassing at all _Pichi_!" Grammy exclaimed, "Now if I told him about your fifteenth birthday party mishap…_that_ would be embarrassing!"

I stared at her blankly. Why would she _ever _bring that up? That blunder is one I want to take to the grave. It was my fifteenth birthday and when all attention was on me, what did I do?

I fell.

And not just that but I toppled off a stage and into a damn foundation. So while everyone had _laughed _that day, Peach tried to pull me out while Father looked stunned with a, 'How in the hell did she manage to do that?' look imprinted on his face.

I stared at Grammy horrified as Bowser chortled with brash laughter. I glared and bared my teeth; he was _so_ lucky Grammy was present at the table or I'd be wailing away at him. Grammy smiled, blue eyes shining with mirth. With a defeated sigh, I ran an agitated hand through my hair.

"Ah yes, so commerce?" Grammy giggled as she sipped at her tea.

Oh so _now_ they wanted to talk about commerce. Bowser looked like he wanted to explode with laughter, I glared at him.

"Your granddaughter is performing exceedingly well," Bowser smirked at Grammy, "She's tenacious, bold and her interests are clearly in the right places. Her people and kingdom are her pride and glory, something we all share in common at this table."

"Yes that sounds just like my _Pichi_, "Grammy nodded her head agreeably, "Taking names and kicking ass just like her grandmother used to in her day."

Bowser nearly choked on his tea, surprised he heard such words come from my delicate, sweet-looking grandmother. The delightfully mischievous grin on Grammy's face had me laugh; I felt sorry for all those poor unsuspecting fools who took my grandmother at face value.

When most people viewed the aged Queen of Sarasaland, they saw an elegant elderly woman with light makeup, snowy hair and kind, sparkling blue eyes. It was always a shock when people realized how much of a firecracker Grammy is.

Even in the autumn of her life she had very few wrinkles on her face, with the only exception being the slight lines around her eyes and mouth which revealed she had smiled and laughed much in her life.

"We've accomplished much, grandmother," I spoke professionally, trying to offset Grammy's casual voice, "As you have observed Sarasaland has opened many new venues of profit making and even channeled our resources into restoring old and new wells alike—"

"How dull," Grammy waved a dismissive hand through the air, "_Pichi _if I really wanted to hear all of that again then I'd sit through another boring meeting."

I blinked, a bit stunned at her sudden dismissal whereas Bowser looked utterly amused. He even coughed; maybe even hiding what I suspected was laughter.

"So," Grammy slapped her hands upon the table, "How's life in the Darklands King Bowser? Last time I stepped foot in the Darklands was when your grandfather King Serous Koopa III was running things."

Unabashed surprise played on the king's usually hardened features, "You…knew my grandfather?"

"Yes!" Grammy smiled, nodding her head, as she took a delicate sip, "Your grandfather and I were dear friends! Good Koopa he was; mild-mannered, patient, one of the few kings of the Darklands who pushed for human-Koopa relationships. For a while we had a student exchange program going on for a couple of decades."

"Really?" I never knew Sarasaland had any true exchanges with the Darklands. Why wasn't I taught this in any of my history lessons?

"Indeed. For a while the anti-Koopa sentiment within the Sarasaland citizenry was very low. Many of our exchange students loved spending their time in the Darklands and vice versa. That program led to the establishment of new businesses and even Darklandian fads within our borders."

Completely enraptured, I listened to Grammy speak, "Women began to purchase silks, perfumes, headscarfs, things that were popular with Koopa women and even our chefs purchased Darklandian spices that were really quite delicious. Some of our citizens began to transfer to their universities and vacationed there."

"So what happened?" I asked, "What restrained our relations so vastly? Every text book I've heard has failed to mention any of this…"

"My good friend Serous had heart complications and passed just at the beginning of this new process. With the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaties being so brand new, the hailing king couldn't anchor the budding relationship. Things became unstable and disintegrated."

Bowser opened his mouth to speak but must have thought otherwise and remained quiet.

"It was all so painful to witness; Serous had survived three painful heart attacks prior," Grammy's blue eyes shined with unshed tears, as her voice dropped to a whisper, "Each one took such a terrible toll upon him. And truthfully, I thought death was better for him, it would mean no more suffering and pain. Anyhow, before he passed Serous had me make a promise to him."

"And what was that?" I was surprised Bowser had asked a question.

Grandmother smiled with watery eyes, "Oh Stars, I tear up every time I think of him and this story. I promised I would keep a watch over the human-Koopa relations and I would watch over his grandson."

Bowser looked stunned, "He…asked you to watch over me? I didn't know you knew my grandfather. He was…the only true father I had."

I looked at Bowser, stunned at his admission, "He died when I couldn't have been older than six but he loved and took care of me when my father didn't. He was the only person who…raised me."

I felt tears touching my eyes, "Bowser…"

The King Koopa's attention was focused solely on Grammy, as if I wasn't even present at the table, "I never knew granddad asked you to look after me."

I was surprised to hear a bitter laugh come from Grammy. It seemed so foreign, "And what good that did, by the following day I was all but forcibly banished from the kingdom."

Bowser looked shell-shocked, not saying a word as Grammy's face was drawn into a cold mask. I had never seen such a dark look on my grandmother's face before; it was unnerving to say the least. All her maternal warmth and kindness had vanished, leaving the stern visage of a woman I didn't know.

"Why were you banished?' Bowser asked softly.

"King Morton knew I wanted to be an important part in his son's life," Grammy spoke softly, fingers idly brushing her tea cup, "And his deep-rooted hatred of humans wouldn't allow that. Stars, I tried to do my best to protect the young Prince Bowser…I really did…"

"Who were you protecting him from?" I asked.

"His father."

"Father."

Both grandmother and Bowser said those words simultaneously. Grandmother's eyes grew nearly indigo with melancholy at the thought of the late king of the Darklands while Bowser became angry; muscles tensing and claws flexing.

"And regulations in the Darklands are a bit different than they are here in Sarasaland," Grammy soft in a whisper.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"What the queen is saying," Bowser looked at me, "is that there must always be a king to rule the Darklands and that meant with the death of my grandfather, father inherited the throne days after his passing."

"And his first order of action was to banish any and all humans and human colonies from the Darklands," grandmother spoke in a solemn tone, "King Morton ordered all human residencies and buildings to be burned, this included schools and homes. That meant all those years of building up Koopa-human relations was destroyed; it was a closed chapter in history."

"King Morton…" I grimaced a bit at the few stories Bowser had told me of his cruel father.

"That Koopa was one of the most brutal dictators in history, he was a horrid soul. He knew how much I treasured his father's friendship but I was never permitted to visit Serous' grave, not even once," grandmother spat, venom alive in her voice and eyes clouded with loss.

"The only good thing about Morton was his precious son. Why that son of his was one of the most darling Koopas I had laid eyes on," Grammy grinned, looking at Bowser who flushed a charming shade of red, "Such a cute little thing you were back then. It broke my heart to know he would try to shape you into a tyrant."

Bowser scowled, glaring at nothing particular. I placed my hand within his large claw and was surprised at how tightly he gripped my hand back.

"But truthfully I think you turned out just fine, King Bowser," Grammy smiled at him, eyes glowing with approval. She reached over the table and took his hand.

"Even though you were raised by that monster, I cannot even begin to imagine what levels of hell you went through," she gripped his hand tighter, "but if my granddaughter likes you then you must be a good Koopa."

Yet again Bowser surprised me by taking her frail hand into his. I looked at the both of them and smiled softly. Although Bowser didn't reciprocate her smile it was obvious his expression was softer, his posture more relaxed than usual. His eyes glowed a clear ruby-red. He was content.

"…Thank you Queen Meringue. I knew the day I met you that you were one of the good humans, just like your granddaughter."

Grammy looked over at me and quirked an eyebrow, "She is something special isn't she?"

Bowser mirrored her mischievous smile, giving a meaningful look in my direction, "Oh she certainly is."

I flushed under their praise as they both laughed. For hours we conversed about nothing special, we just enjoyed the warm afternoon, listening to Grammy's tales and adventures of her youth. She told of all the ways as a girl she had snuck out of the palace, became a master archer, rode sand-cyclers one-handed and gave her father premature gray hair.

Twice Bowser had said some snarky comment about me—either about being clumsy or boyish—and twice I kicked that overgrown turtle under the table. To his credit the only response he made was a twisted smirk.

"Yes my _Pichi _is quite darling but she's a bit…maladroit when it comes to some things," Grammy smiled.

"What does that mean?" I raised an eyebrow.

Laughing obtusely, Bowser chimed in, "She said you're clumsy. Stars if that isn't the truth!"

While I laughed good-naturedly to save face, I kicked Bowser _as hard as I could_ beneath the table. Just when I thought his stupidity was done, a huge foot rubbed against my leg, my thigh flirtatiously. I squeaked, surprised by the blatant fondling he was doing. The questioning glance from Grammy only made my cheeks glow pinker.

Stars this was _so_ embarrassing and Bowser was _enjoying it all. _Head resting in his palm, his smirk was nothing but sin and fire. This gigantic turtle jackass had his foot _up my dress_, caressing my leg...! I ground my teeth, growling as my face burned with embarrassment.

"Are you okay darling?" This was all made worse because Grammy seemed genuinely concerned, "Is the desert heat getting to you? You seem a bit red?"

"Yeah princess, is the _heat _getting to you?" The sinful grin must have been branded on his face because Bowser was enjoying himself all too much.

"N-N-No, I'm uh…f-fine Grammy," my voice was still three octaves higher than it usually was.

The entire time Bowser watched me, smirking insidiously as I tried to keep myself from blushing burgundy. We shared a glance once more and Bowser arched an eyebrow and gave a sly smile; secretly I think we both agreed on calling a truce: I won't kick him anymore and he wouldn't…play footsie or whatever he had done.

_What a jerk…_

* * *

><p>By the time twilight had rolled by the sky was fading into an enchanting shade of plum and the servants were beginning to clean up our tea party. The lights in the sand garden sparkled to life in a flare of rainbow colors as the nightlife of the garden was inaugurated in a magical grandeur.<p>

We all decided it was time to bid farewell to Bowser; it's quite possible with eight Koopalings being present, the infamous Bowser's keep was destroyed by now. So before he left, we gave him a box of pastries to take on the road. We stood beside his gigantic clown car and Bowser seemed content to look around the garden.

"This place is kinda nice at night," he said softly, taking in the different glowing lanterns and the serene setting.

"I shall notify the custodians of how King Bowser admires their handiwork," Grammy beamed, "They will be most flattered."

Bowser nodded his head before he stepped closer to us, "So Queen Meringue, do I 'check out'? Am I good enough to court your beauteous granddaughter?"

His comment sparked a hot blush in my cheeks as Grammy laughed, her wide smile mirroring a similar one on Bowser's face, "Please dear call me Grammy, no need with the formalities."

Grammy looked between the two of us and although she was smiling, her eyes were serious, "You know courting my granddaughter will not be an easy task, though a wonderful one."

"I know," Bowser purred softly, "And I'm more than up for any challenge and I'd do anything for your granddaughter. She is precious to me too."

Grammy studied Bowser silently for a moment, "You are of fine character, King Bowser. And therefore the council will know you have my blessing to pursue my _Pichi_."

Bowser's soft grin blossomed into a full-fledged smile and he laughed, "Oh yeahahaha!"

He surprised us both by throwing his arms into the air and unearthing a victorious roar. Grammy chuckled, turning to study my expression with a curious smile as I blushed at the king's celebration; Stars, you'd think he won the Mushroom lottery or something.

"Well I must say I enjoyed your company today King Bowser," Grammy beamed up at him, "And I hope you shall enjoy those jelly dellies."

Bowser chuckled lightly, "Oh I will. Ever since the _Sumanni_, I've been seeing those babies in my dreams. They're so creamy and delicious. It's like having a party in your mouth."

Grammy laughed, playfully nudging Bowser in his ribs, "Well glad I could please the King of Koopas!"

"I'm very pleased my Queen."

A slender digit was brandished in a kind admonishment, "Ah, Grammy please."

Again the energy around Bowser relaxed, as I caught just the slightest wag from his tail, "Alright then Grammy."

Grammy peered at me before she wiped sweat away from her brow, "Whew! Well this old woman is bushed! I'm going to go and rest a bit at the table. I trust you two can finish up your goodbyes alone?"

"Alone?" I asked.

There was something mischievous with the way Grammy grinned at us one last time before she hobbled off to our table. What did she mean 'finish up your goodbyes alone?' I bit my lip thoughtfully; why if I didn't know any better, I'd think …

_It's almost like she planned this on purpose._

A bit bashfully I turned to face Bowser. His face was set in that irresistible half-smirk of his, showing off a long incisor. It seemed the more I looked at him the more opportunities I had to study him. It was strange but I think I'm starting to see him as attractive in a roguish sort of way.

In the twilight horizon the world around us was a palette of muted color; the sand dunes were a deep tawny and the sky was a magical blend of purple and blue. I took a step closer to Bowser who did likewise.

I felt uncharacteristically nervous and said the first thing that happened to mind, "Hi."

He grinned, "Hey."

The deep, satiny purr traveled from the tips of my toes and spread throughout my entire being. Stars, had his voice _always _sounded like that?

"I really enjoyed today with you Bowser."

"Yeah I had fun with you and Grammy too. She's a riot," he chuckled, "You know the more I talk to your family, I begin to think not all you humans are useless."

I chuckled, shaking my head. I followed impulse and leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him in a hug. I couldn't hug him completely seeing as he was just _huge. _Bowser purred loudly as he wrapped his massive arms around me.

"Oh if your grandmother wasn't here I'd kiss the hell outta you," he growled in my ear, "You look beautiful in that dress. Half of the time I had to pretend I was listening to your grandmother."

I blushed as Bowser pulled away. Now his smile was nothing but trouble again, "You're such a mess King Bowser."

"I know," he purred, "but as long as it brings that pretty blush to your face, then I'll continue to be your mess."

I felt my heart beating wildly against my sternum. I pressed a palm to my chest as I looked down, "…Hey Bowser?"

His voice was soft, "Yeah?"

"Is your heart beating fast now?" I asked softly.

I felt a warm finger of his curl under my chin. As he drew my chin up to his face, I looked up at him, "Damn straight it is."

In that instance we were frozen; him grinning as I blinked up at him. Under the fading light of twilight, I studied those lovely ruby eyes of his. True they could be dark with ire and cruelty but then there were these moments when his eyes were soft.

I was met with a hooded gaze as he purred; the sound carrying as he slowly leaned forward. I realized where this was going and the unwelcome scald of blush caked my cheeks. As he inched closer to my face, I realized we had company.

My grandmother was peering at us.

_From the bushes._

"Bowser…" I whispered, "My…grandmother's _watching_ us."

His eyes snapped open instantaneously.

Talk about a mood killer.

"She's hiding in the bushes," I said through gritted teeth, "I can't believe her…!"

Bowser actually began to laugh. His laughter—if not at my expense—was always so infectious. We laughed for a few moments before he spoke, "_Tsk_, guess I can't get a good bye smooch then. That lipstick is tempting me so _badly_."

He was staring at my mouth intensely. Blushing, I pressed my hand to my mouth; my nude lipstick was tempting him to kiss me!?

"I'll make a deal," he was grinning again, "I want a lipstick print on my cheek before I go."

Confused, I tilted my head, "Uh, how do I do that?"

He rolled his eyes playfully, "Since I can't kiss you…You ever play that 'Follow the leader game' as a kid?"

"Yeah…why?"

"Here, follow leader," He raised his hand to his mouth and kissed it. I started laughing.

"You want me to do _that?_" It was my turn to roll my eyes, "Looks crazy but ugh, fine."

Echoing his actions, I kissed my palm. Grinning, Bowser pressed his palm against my cheek. I still didn't see where this was going but he took a knee so I could do the same to him. I pressed my palm against his left cheek and grinned when a perfectly visible peach-pink smooch print appeared.

"It's there now," I grinned.

"Perfect," He smirked, "Not exactly how I wanted to get this on my face but it'll have to do…for now. I better say goodnight Flower, Stars know hiding in bushes can't be good for your grandmother's back."

I laughed, "I'm so sorry. She's just unbelievable! And goodnight Bowser."

He gave me one last lingering appraisal, a look so smoldering it shot heat through the pit of my stomach, before he turned and popped into the clown car. I watched the car take flight, hovering in the darkening sky. I barely registered when Grammy came to stand beside me.

We both watched the clown car lift higher and higher into the sky. Bowser threw a fist into the air one last time and emitted a loud roar before the car flew off into the distance. I took Grammy's arm in mine as we started on our walk to the palace.

Grammy looked up at me and gave an impish grin, "So…Did you give him a kiss?"

I blushed, "G-Grammy! No! Of course not…I...That wouldn't be proper!"

"It's twilight, the sky is purple, the lights are glowing magically in the garden. This was a _perfect_ time!" she was laughing, "I left you two alone for a reason!"

"Grammy! I saw you _watching _us!" I laughed, "What does the Queen of Sarasaland look like hiding in bushes, peeking at her granddaughter!?"

Grammy chuckled, "Hiding you say? I was simply admiring the rose bushes."

"Anyways," I rolled my eyes, still grinning, "What do you think?"

"Oh the pastries were divine. They can't touch Rosie's pastries on her worst day though. But not bad at all."

"Grammy!" I laughed, "You know what I mean! I meant about Bowser."

"Oh yes him," Grammy slanted her eyes at me mischievously, "Well it's very obvious _Pichi_."

"What is?"

Grammy tossed her head back and laughed, "That the King of Koopas is clearly head over heels for my pretty little _Pichi_."

* * *

><p>Ultrra: Hey everyone! (hands out free llamas to readers) Welcome and I hope you enjoyed reading. Remember, your new llama needs an open pasture to graze, plenty of sunshine and they spit. O_O FAR.<p>

Alice:…

Ultrra: Alice and I—well _I _just want to thank you all for reading. Reviewers, keep on reviewing and motivating Alice and readers you guys are awesome! If you're in between that zone where you've favored the story but haven't let a review? Well come on down and leave your first review! We're nice! And we've got free strawberry lemonade and kittens for the new reviewers!

Alice: O_O Can I leave a review? I want a kitty!

Ultrra: And as for you die-hard, awesome always-reviewing reviewers…We've got your milkshakes and puppies waiting. Go ahead and take them on your way out when you review. And if you want a second milkshake…I'll turn my head and pretend I didn't see it. ;)


	19. Princess: Dinner with the Suitors

Alice: 200 plus reviews…I can't…My head is spinning! In a good way of course! ^_^

Ultrra: That's great and all but we've got some serious problems here.

Alice: Huh…? Like what?

Ultrra: (Points to reviewers) I've been receiving complaints and heard...some of ya'll out there aren't taking care of your llamas!

Alice:….You gave people LLAMAS! What did you expect!?

Ultrra: (Opens a newspaper) Tsk look at this 'A llama was found in a library chewing up books and spitting them out at anyone who walked by.' Alright, fess up…Whose llama was that!?

Alice: (blinks) Wow…I guess those are some really gnarly spit balls! O_O

Ultrra: Also someone else's llama was standing in the middle of a highway stalling traffic…She had a blue collar. So if that's your llama… (Glares)

Alice: (Sighs) See, this is what happens when I let you do things. -_- Things get WRECKED!

Ultrra: Not true! I helped make those cookies!

Alice: Scorched to DEATH.

Ultrra: You let me play Sonic the Hedgehog!

Alice: (Stares) Yeah and you used up all the continues I earned!

Ultrra: Something tells me that was _your_ llama…

Alice: I don't even have a llama! (Sighs) Anyways, reviewers, readers you all are AWESOME! ^_^ I think I'll put off the Q and A for one more chapter! 20 sounds like a big hallmark to have the Q and A sessions! Also...I'm pretty sure this chapter will inspire some interesting questions.

Ultrra: Hmm...

Alice: Also one of the characters mention a 'chow' which is a real character in Super Mario RPG and Land's End is a real level too. You should go look it up! I think the chow is cute!

Ultrra: (Reading Newspaper) Yesterday a llama was found in the drive way of a Burger King...Wonder if he wanted a whopper...

Alice: Lol! And yes, just like the Mario characters, all of the OC's names are 'puns' XP You could try and guess why they have their names! With that said, go ahead, read, enjoy and review! :3

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoO**

* * *

><p>The clacking of a woman's heels echoed through the silent corridor. The light footfalls stopped before a rotting, dead-bolted door. A fair eyebrow was raised and just as curious digits reached out to touch the moldering wood, a new presence appeared.<p>

"Has the worm been planted?" An emotionless masculine voice spoke.

Lilly-white fingers receded with little guilt, "Of course. Everything the king does is being closely monitored. I hope that will please your oh-so mysterious lordship."

"The Master is very pleased with the progress being made," Eyes narrowed slightly, "Keeping a watch on that lizard king will be easy pickings now. Funny how a pretty face destroys a ruthless man's defense."

"But sire," the woman quipped with an embellished, saccharine voice, "Love makes even the most fierce men turn into fools!"

"Hn." A noncommittal grunt.

In the poor lighting of the lair, the woman could barely decipher the features of the man she spoke to. He was tall, swathed almost from head to toe and every now and then the flickering candlelight made his eyes glimmer.

But then again…It wasn't her job to figure these people out. Although she was curious as to what was behind that door. It had to be the room their Master resided. Every order she had received from the Master was curiously secondhand; he always sent some lackey or that Red dude to deal with her.

_What? Am I not special enough to receive the Master's direct orders? Hmph._

All she wanted was just to see what the Master looked like. Curiosity killed the cat but she was a crafty kitty. The big bossman had to be powerful, fear-inspiring to have a creed of powerful Ninji obeying his words like lapdogs.

_How and where do I sign up for some authority like that?_

Maybe she could just peer in for a second and…

"The Master no longer requires your presence."

Get your ass out of here now. Dually noted.

"Very well," her voice tinkled, an easy smile crossing her pretty face, "Toodlesand tell your Master I said hey."

And with that she spun on her heel and flounced away with a stride that had most of the men's eyes honed on her figure. She even winked coquettishly at one Ninji as she ran a hand through her silken, cotton candy-pink hair.

_Things sure will get interesting pretty fast…Best to stay ahead of these guys._

* * *

><p>"Bowser…" <em>A soft, breathy voice floated through his thoughts with all the gravity of whipped cream.<em>

_The sight he was met with was superb; an image he wished could be branded into his memory. The princess sat on his knee, dressed in a long t-shirt ending tantalizingly at her thighs. Sultry blue eyes scorched like inferno, pupils dilated predatorily, thick blood-red locks tussled in delicious curls and lips invitingly damp. She looked absolutely delectable._

_Tan fingers lovingly traced over corded, scaly biceps with an appraising wonder. Those dark, midnight blues glowed with hunger as her long fingers continued their trek of worship. The shrine she was a devoted convert to was the masculine, powerful physique of King Bowser._

"Absolutely beautiful…" _Another soft purr escaped those buttery lips he loved_, "What a powerful physique…So manly…So perfect…"

_An anxious hand trailed down his plastron with painstaking care, neatly fitting into the groves of his shell with each movement. The King himself purred, eyes hooded as he watched the beautiful woman's delight._

"I have a gift for you my king," _she smiled, cheeks flushing cherry-red,_ "I hope you'll enjoy…"

"Do what you must," _A slow grin crawled on the king's face_, "to please your king."

_The princess hopped off of him and the powerful king growled at the loss of her soft body against his. She continued to walk away, long, honey legs and swaying hips stealing his attention. She began to slowly pull the shirt over her head._

_Bowser felt his throat dry—wait, that wasn't manly at all. Let's try that again…_

_Bowser grinned, reclining in his seat to behold the glory._

_Slowly the shirt rose inch by inch…_

_Go on…_

_And higher…And higher…_

_Yes…Yes…_

_The beginning of a slender, bronze back was revealed._

_Bowser leaned forward, grinning happily._

_Just a little more…Just a little more…!_

**_BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP !_**

_KER-SMASH!_

Bowser sat up in bed; claws still outstretched and breath escaping in heavy panting. The wrecked remains of his poor alarm clock were scattered in broken bits over the floor. With a loud growl, he buried his face into his hands.

"_ARGH! DAMN IT_!" He roared, "This time…That felt _so real_. But Stars that was so damn hot."

Bowser blinked, wiping his jaw when he realized he had been drooling._ Drooling_? Me drooling over a girl like a lovesick puppy!? He growled, snatching the quilts away as he stomped towards his lavatory. He was King Bowser and koopettes fell over him, chased after him in droves and pinched his tail when their husbands weren't looking.

They openly told him their fantasies and demanded him to have wild affairs. Hell, there have been a few koopettes who've even tried to drag him into their beds. Bowser hurriedly cupped a palm of water and doused his face; supermodels, actresses, he could have his pick of any beautiful woman he wanted.

He was _not_ lovesick.

He was the _King Bowser!_ Studmuffin extraordinaire! He dated and _banged_ the most beautiful, most affluent women around. Not long ago his bedroom had been a revolving door; one hot chick steps out only for the next hot chick to enter.

Ever since he first saw her, something weird happened. All those other pretty faces, those gorgeous women didn't satisfy him anymore. Desire dried up like a creek as he no longer found himself wanting to sleep with hordes of attractive women and he swore off them cold turkey.

The only woman he ached to touch…

_Bright blue eyes…_

_Honey-brown complexion…_

_A killer smile…_

_Legs for days…_

At the thought of her, blush flamed his cheeks and his tail wagged. Then he realized how childish his behavior was and growled; but look! She made him blush! And King Bowser never blushes! He had slept with the most gorgeous, buxom women and had done some…_Crazy-fun naughty _things. Bowser laughed at the thought of all his sexcapades; those were some good times. Maybe one day I'll have to write a book or something. It'll be top seller material easily.

Funny how one guy could have the most amazing sex life but the thought of one girl brought a studly, too damn manly Koopa to his knees. Innocent thoughts of her made him blush! Bowser grinned deviously; yeah and so did the _not-so-innocent_ ones too but that's a different story for a different day.

He stared hard at his reflection, wicked carmine eyes blazed bright in the shadows of the room. She had to be the first woman he actually tried this hard for. With other women he desired, he would purr some charming lines or give a look and they came running but not this one.

The true girl he wanted.

Bowser smirked; fate had a royally screwed up sense of humor; every single woman he'd been with wanted him because he was rich and powerful. And she couldn't care less about all that. The only woman he _truly_ desired wasn't impressed by his status and she certainly was anything but a one night stand.

Even if he _could_ sleep with her, he wouldn't want just one night. He'd want her for the rest of eternity. She would be more than a bed partner, he'd want her as a companion, a wife, a friend. Someone he could confide his deepest secrets to, someone who would kiss and hug his children at night, someone who would sit in the throne next to him as his illustrious queen.

Although honestly…having her every night would be _real nice_. Such a thought made the great king purr with delight. Deep down inside he had no doubt she was special. And he was absolutely resolute that if he had to go through hell or high water, he'd win her. The door to his room suddenly jarred open with a loud bang as Junior came running in, in a loud fit of tears. Startled, Bowser almost jumped out of his skin when his youngest child latched onto his leg.

"Son?" He was still too surprised to be angry, "You know to knock before coming into daddy's room. Unless it's really important..."

"I know," Junior sniffled, large eyes peering up, "B-B-But R-R-Roy ripped my teddybear Koopa into halves!"

Bowser rolled his eyes, "_Junior..._I'll buy you a new one okay? I don't see why you-"

"It was the one _M-Mama Daisy_ bought me," he sniffed, appearing down trodden.

The King's eyes narrowed as a roll of smoke billowed from his nose. _He ripped a teddy Koopa bear Flower bought!? A teddy Flower had purchased with her own two pretty little hands!? Oh hell no, I'm gonna handle this NOW. _He picked up Junior and stomped out of the room, "_ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOY_!"

* * *

><p>Three days after my afternoon tea party, I knew today was going to be the beginning of the end; I was going to meet all my suitors. We would hold court here in Sarasaland and have the young men introduce themselves over a fine banquet.<p>

The following day Grammy and I would be taken on tours of each bachelor's kingdom and learn about their culture, people, and livelihoods. And since I wouldn't be traveling alone, my other suitors would tag along.

Since I was to make a good impression for tonight's banquet, the council hand-selected an outfit for me to wear. Knowing how conservative the Sarasaland council was, my dress would probably look like something fresh out of a monastery.

It was the day of destiny and as I should have expected, Lady Angora arrived at my quarters early, throwing the curtains open. A sea of sunlight scalded the darkness and burned my eyes in the process. My vision flooded white, disappearing into a painful nothingness as I shielded my eyes.

"_ARGH_!"

"Princess Sarasaland, it is time to awaken," Against the bright backdrop I could see Angora's slim silhouette, "We have much to plan for and much to accomplish today."

I groaned, finally opening my eyes to see the thin, lithe form of Angora. Yet again she adorned an elegant powder blue dress, nearly matching her china blue eyes. In the pale daylight her complexion appeared nearly ghost-like.

I sat up, rubbing my eyes as she approached. I barely realized when she took a lock of my wild hair into her salt-white hands, "_Stars in Star Haven_, what are we going to _do_ with this? It's as coarse as a starfruit bush. Well I'm glad I hired the best stylists in Sarasaland. Now up."

Lady Angora spoke with the hair and make-up stylist in hushed whispers, diligently watching their progress. While the staff tamed my hair, Lady Angora went through a list of manners and customs and I recited each one until she was pleased.

In the midst of the hair grooming and makeup application, I took a mental vacation. My thoughts took me back to the tea party, back to the afternoon I spent in the company of my grandmother and Bowser. I could hear my grandmother's voice as clear as a bell.

_"Well it's very obvious Pichi."_

_"What is?"_

I could still hear Grammy's tinkling laughter, "_That the King of Koopas is clearly head over heels for my pretty little Pichi_."

_That can't be…_

Bowser? Head over heels…For _me!_? T-That can't be right! Bowser wouldn't, _couldn't_ like a girl like me. I'm a scrawny, boyish girl. His type of woman he drooled over was probably beautiful—intimidatingly so. Perfect curves, sultry eyes and a flood of confidence.

The stunning ex-queen Clawdia came to mind; an exquisite creature of marvelous beauty and poise. She was a Koopette who had beauty that could make even the most confident woman falter. How could I ever measure up to that? _Not to mention she has THE best set of...ahem 'knockers' I've EVER seen. And Bowser certainly seems like a Koopa who'd love him some big—_

"Princess," Angora's smooth voice carved through my fortress of thoughts, "The stylists will finish your hair now."

"Ah, okay…"

It was hours later I was made up, maquillage and hair done. However before I could see myself, Lady Angora pulled me aside, "By the grand council's orders we must dress you properly."

"Okay..."

I thought nothing of her statement but with the way her lips pulled into a tense red ribbon and her cat-like eyes couldn't hold my stare, I should have picked up on the red flags. Lady Angora handed a box to me. _SaraSara_ was written in a beautiful, shimmering golden cursive on the box.

I may not be much of a girly-girl but even I knew how exclusive and expensive this designer was. I took the box and slowly opened it. I discarded the fancy-smancy tissue paper and found a blood red dress, an eye-popping shade that would turn heads.

I removed the dress and felt my jaw hit the floor. I peered at Angora, absolutely scandalized at the small amount of material the dress had. She cleared her throat politely, eyes averted. _What in the world is this!? There's no way I'm supposed to wear this!_

For a council of old men who thought women did nothing but bear sons and survive in the kitchen, they were certainly selling me out! I could recall countless times as a child where they would tell my Father how inappropriate my dress was if it showed my knees.

And here they were, selecting not only a form-fitting dress but one that was above my knees and would virtually show off my bust. I shot another desperate glance at Angora, whose dark brows were still furrowed and cheeks flushed.

"Come now," she spoke, her voice not quite neutral, "We must get you ready."

I dressed myself with the help of a couple of handmaidens—Stars this dress was tight! It felt like I was wearing a corset. Once finished Angora moved away, lips pursed as the maids studied me with a level of astonishment. I stepped in front my mirror and gaped.

_Oh._

_My._

_Stars._

This dress was the most revealing thing I've ever worn. It was low-cut with the deepest portion of the dress reaching to my navel. Yes my _navel_. Yet the back of the dress was elegant and trailed the floor with a flowing train.

If I make a wrong move…One wrong twist or a fall, I could be flashing these guys in every way imaginable. I don't even know where to begin trying to cover myself up here! I put on matching red pumps and honestly I looked more fitting to be dancing on a tabletop than being presented as a princess.

I don't even look like myself, with the heavily applied foundation, black eyeshadow and darkly lined eyes. My lipstick was a dark burgundy, as if the color had been transferred from the skin of an apple and onto my lips.

I turned to look at Lady Angora with pleading eyes, "You told me when I was little that a lady should be modest and elegant, poised and proper. But this dress—I am nowhere near ladylike. You can't let me go out looking like...like_ this_."

_I-I can see my boobies!_ I _have _boobies! Oh Stars this is _embarrassing..._

"You look absolutely ravishing Princess Sarasaland."

While she said this, her eyes gave away her true feelings. Her normally poised visage was unusually flustered, as if she didn't believe what she was saying.

"It is the supreme wishes of the council that you present yourself in a dress they say is 'simply stunning'," Again, Lady Angora winced as if the dishonesty of her own were words were physically prickly.

I glowered, "'Simply stunning' and 'simply skanky' are two different things! What will my suitors think of this!?"

Angora's icy eyes darted away; even if she couldn't outright say it, she disagreed with this dress. She had no power to affect the council. The elders would continue to pull the strings and as their puppet I would dance to their jig.

"As ladies," Lady Angora's voice was soft like lanolin, "sometimes we must sacrifice our...happiness for the will of others."

"Why?" I whispered.

I was met with a dry smile, "It is our reality. We live in a world where men write the rules and as women we will jump through their hoops."

"I want to change that," I glared at nothing, "When I become Empress in the future..."

Lady Angora smiled lightly, "Someday princess."

There was a loud knock on my door, "Princess, your suitors shall be arriving here shortly."

I glanced at myself in a long mirror and fretted. Everything was completely wrong with my appearance; my dress was too form-fitting and short, my hair too straight, lipstick too bright, foundation too heavy. I frowned at the front of my dress; how could the council even think this dress was any good!?

It barely covered my breasts and the top nearly dipped into the middle of my navel. Oh Stars this is embarrassing. Truly I looked more like an escort than a modest princess. The Toad servant, Alabaster, entered the room and bowed with a flourish.

"My princess I—_yowza_!"

At the sight of the swarthy Toad's widening eyes and gaping mouth, I could only look away, cheeks hot, "…It's that bad huh?"

"Erm…N-No not at a-all p-princess," Alabaster gulped, his face growing redder by the second, "You just l-look amazing!"

"You do look stellar," Angora replied.

"Thanks," I whispered, trying to avoid glancing at my reflection.

I turned to look at our servant, "Was there something you came in here for?"

Alabaster blinked, "Oh that's right! I came to tell you the suitors are here. I will have the privilege of announcing your arrival to the throne room."

_Sheyt._

"Thank you."

I glanced at Lady Angora one last time but she still had the same closed expression. Alabaster was clearly waiting for me, so with one last dejected sigh, I turned to follow him. We marched from my room and traveled through the halls. As we headed towards the throne room, I tried to ignore the blatant stares and dropping jaws from passing servants.

"My princess, you look absolutely radiant!"

"Simply splendid!"

"Marvelous!"

"You look beautiful!"

At the praise of my subjects, I blushed at the continuous stream of flowery compliments and admirations. I smiled, looking around at my staff.

"Thank you all," I spoke softly.

I continued to follow Alabaster, cheeks ruby-red as we made our way towards the throne room. I had my arms covering my exposed bust as modestly as I could. The tiny Toadstool turned to me and smiled, "Don't be nervous princess! I've got your back. If any of those losers get out of line, I'll crack 'em in the head with a karate chop!"

I laughed, "Alabaster! That's completely unnecessary…But the signal will be a thumbs-up."

"You got it princess!" He grinned pretty ruthlessly for a cute Toad.

Alabaster cleared his throat and pushed the doors open with a loud thud. The tanned Toad gave one last wink in my direction before he tromped into the throne room. I heard his voice echo, bouncing off the walls like sonar, "Gentlemen, presenting the crown princess and future empress, Lady Daisy of Sarasaland."

I inhaled one last breath for courage and trounced in. The sight of familiar stain-glass windows and the white marble walls of the throne room should have been a medication for my anxiety. I had walked hundreds of times up and down the cream-colored carpet where my suitors stood, all huddled before the throne.

My eyes swept across the throng of suitors and Bowser's iconic spiked shell and Luigi's apple-green hat were the first two distinguishable items from the crowd. I began to walk towards the throne with the poise of a princess—spine straight, stomach pulled taunt— taking careful steps in my towering heels.

"Her Loveliness approaches," Alabaster purred, taking a knee and inclining his head.

The soft notes of a harp tinkled, dancing midair with a divine chime of melody. At Alabaster's exclamation, heads turned in my direction. The young suitors glanced my way as I glided towards my throne. Each of the young men's faces altered at the sight of my scandalous gown.

From the edge of my vision Luigi gaped, face-turning red as Bowser's jaw dropped. Even the usually composed Ryu elevated an eyebrow in interest. For just the tiniest of seconds, Father gaped. Then his composure returned, walls back up as he stared at me, expression oddly vacant.

_Ooooh Stars, what was he thinking about this dress?_

He looked furious, that's what I know! Grammy on the other hand looked stunned, expression stuck somewhere between surprise and amusement. Although she did manage to give a thumb's up and mouthed, 'Wow!'

Alabaster took my hand, courteously helping me ascend the stairs and move towards the throne. The soft harmonies of the harp fell into stillness as I delicately took my seat. When I sat on the throne, I made sure to sit perfectly ladylike or else my suitors would receive a glorious, prime 'free peek' up my dress.

And really, what could be worse than that?...There are plenty of things! You could spill right out of the chair, fall flat on your face like an idiot and then flash all of them! Okay, I'm going to stop jinxing myself here.

"Gentlemen," Father's cultured voice carried through the room pleasurably, "We of the Sarasaland court would like to have you meet our splendid princess. If you will, please present yourselves to our ladyship."

The first to approach the throne was Luigi. I smiled, eyes crinkling as he removed his customary hat and bowed. Lulu was dressed in a dark tuxedo with his hair slicked back and boots well-polished. His face glowed a charming shade of red as he drank in my image.

"Hello Princess," I smiled at the nervy warble in his voice, "M-My name's L-Luigi Mario and-a uh…As you know-a I'm a plumber and m-m-m-my brother-a and I run a family plumbing business-a. Its' been in-a our f-family since my great grandpa established it in 1899."

A few of my suitors sneered, noses wrinkled in disdain when Luigi mentioned his profession as a plumber. I suppose being near a commoner was a troubling thought to them. Lulu wrung his green hat in his hands fretfully, a line of perspiration forming above his brow line. I frowned, concern increasing for my friend; why was he so nervous? It was only me.

"I'm a-also," he cleared his throat, "I'm h-h-half of the heroic Super Mario brothers."

"Welcome Lord Luigi," Father spoke crisply, with a detached professionalism and yet a bit of warmth touched his features at the recognition of my old friend.

That's right, as babies we had played together and in the golden afternoons of days long passed, Grammy had fed us a steady diet of gooey cookies and cold milk. Luigi was the only suitor my Father had been like a second father figure to.

The pomposity of a few suitors sifted into mild interest at Luigi's declaration of being a renowned hero. I smiled at Lulu before I gazed at my next suitor. Heat flooded my cheeks in a torrent of rosy blush as I met the dark cerulean eyes of Ryu.

He inclined his head in a respectful bow to Father, Grammy and I. Dressed in a dark gray sleeveless silk kimono, I thought he looked beguiling as always. He wasn't even flexing and I could see the powerful muscles in his arms perfectly.

_It's obvious the Stars spent a liiiiiiitle more time on him when he was created. Stars help me he's delicious…_

"Oh!" Grammy whispered, "Such a handsome young man!"

I nodded my head in agreement. Father snorted as Grammy laughed.

"_Konnichiwa_," Ryu's deep voice was as smooth and as dark as the fabric he wore, "I am Ryu, the 205th Clan leader of the Hidden Lotus Village. My people are a warrior clan, born and bred to study and master one's inner strength built within the art of combat."

"Ooh! How wonderful!" Grammy cooed.

"Welcome Lord Ryu," Father nodded his head in acknowledgement before he glanced to the next suitor.

Beside the gorgeous clan leader was a slender young man with round, child-like eyes and hair so salt-white it looked like a photo in negative. He was dressed in an icy blue tunic, dark leggings and a long, dashing cape. He had really cute, big puppy-like sapphire eyes.

The second our gazes locked, he flushed an obvious rosy-red against his pale complexion and bowed several times. I held back a laugh; he was kind of cute! After his fifth deep bow he finally straightened up and spoke. Even from the corner of my vision Grammy's large grin was apparent.

"H-H-Hello P-Princess Daisy," although his voice was deep, it was soft like a breath of wind. As his cheeks blazed pink, he twiddled his thumbs, gaze aimed at my red pumps, "M-My name's S-Silver and I am the prince of the Moonstone Kingdom. My kingdom is a land of i-ice and snow year around and w-we are gifted with beautiful aurora borealis a-annually. Um. Yes. That's all. Thank you for having me."

I smiled; so we had another shy young man in our midst eh? It was a refreshing change from all the arrogant, self-absorbed princes I've met. You know, for being one of the council's choices, he seems like an actually nice guy.

"Welcome Lord Silver."

A gentle, genuine smile crossed Silver's flushed face as he bobbed his head appreciatively. Aww he was so cute! His eyes darted in my direction once more and as I sent a grin his way, red exploded across his face. Charmed, I laughed softly.

I could tell I was going to have some fun with him...

Standing alongside the flustered Silver was a young man I knew all too well. And hoped to never see again. He had sleazy, slicked-back wheat-gold hair, broad shoulders, a tall frame and dashingly fetching features. His steel-gray eyes were slanted, as if stuck in a perpetual glare and seemed almost serpentine in nature.

Remember the prince from my Summani who was so self-absorbed he could enjoy his own company? This was that man. He didn't bother to incline his head in a show of proper respect, "As you know I am Prince Taurus of the Aqualands.

My aquatic kingdom is stationed on land and underwater jointly. We are able to generate power and run our kingdom sufficiently with hydroelectricity capabilities. Our market for selling fresh seafood is one of the most profitable exports of all kingdoms."

Show of hands, _whoooooo's_ surprised Taurus is an arrogant braggart!?

I'm not!

We locked stares, silver and blue irises meeting in a clash of color. A slow, arrogant grin crawled onto his face as he winked. I glared, biting my lip in an attempt to hold back a severe tongue lashing. Ugh! How could the council even consider this man for marriage!?

It was simple, my kingdom desperately needed water and his kingdom had a surplus of the good. The Aqualands had Sarasaland on a leash and we would roll over and sit if it meant receiving water. If I honestly wished to keep Sarasaland from suffering drought and famine, then my choice was clear: Marry this awful man so I could save my people.

"Welcome Lord Taurus."

Taurus smirked, inclining his head to Father before glancing my way to unabashedly eyeball my figure. I flushed beet-red; teeth grating together and fingers gripping the throne's armrests fiercely as his stare lingered on my plunged neckline.

Standing beside the perv was councilman Salini's son, Zero. Like most of our wealthy who didn't need to toil in the sun, he was pale with his only true Sarasalandian desert features being his dark hair and mocha-brown eyes.

At the sight of him, my lip involuntarily curled in a sneer; I had known him since I was a girl and honestly he was far worse than Prince Taurus in my opinion—or just as bad. He had been cruel to me as a child and had always influenced other rich Sarasalandian children to loath me. And like brainless sheep, they all did just that.

He was the childhood bully who had started my long-hated nickname that traveled with me through most of my girlhood: _kisa giya_. Which translated into 'ugly girl'. Zero had somehow managed to convince all my other playmates that my thick tangle of hair and bronze skin was unattractive.

So twelve years later, here I stand nearly the same as when I was a child; the same wild, curling mass of thick hair and the same topaz, olive complexion. And now this man suddenly wanted to marry me? I thought I still strongly resembled the _'kisa giya'_ the ugly girl he once despised so happily.

Yay! I get the chance to marry this guy! It makes me want to—

—_Gouge my eyes out with a spear!_

Zero took a bow as I watched, "Hello Princess Daisy," he spoke in fluent Sarasalandian, a ploy to seem more intimate perhaps?

I nearly vomited at the thought of intimacy. And then I went back to reconsidering the eye-gouging.

"I am Zero Salini and the future heir to the Sarasalandian Council Protectorate position. We both hail from the same glorious kingdom of golden sand and dry heat. We were raised together, friends through the years and it seems in those years you have blossomed into a beautiful princess, a woman worthy of being a queen."

I snorted derisively and Grammy promptly poked me in the side.

"Play nicely, dearie," she replied softly, eyes twinkling with mischief.

I looked away from Zero quickly; almost all too obviously sucking on my teeth. Yeah it was rude but do I care? I was incensed and mortified I had to consider him as a potential groom. And what was that hooey about being 'friends through the years?' Oh Stars please strike him down for such a blatant lie!

"Thank you Lord Zero. Who is the next—?"

"Hey there princess!" boomed a rough, energetic voice. I turned to look at the grinning face.

This young man was tan, darker than my own dusky complexion with long, wild dark hair pulled into a massive ponytail and bright golden eyes. He had some sort of dark blue and red arrow-shaped tattoo on his cheek I couldn't make out.

He stood confidently, arms akimbo and a large toothy smile spread across his face. He was human but something about him seemed feral, animalistic almost. "How ya doin'? Name's Wolfesbane and I'm from Land's End but everyone calls me Wolfe. I'm the he—er well technicallymy mom's the Head alpha of the Canine Clan. But I'll be the alpha someday! We farm and raise creatures called 'Chow'. They are intelligent and amazing wolves. They serve as guardians, watchdogs, companions, workers, they do almost anything! They're really great…"

Wolfe released a sharp whistle and suddenly a dark blue, hand-sized puppy popped onto his shoulder and began to yip animatedly, stubby tail wagging with glee, "This is Puppo. He's my own guardian. He says, 'Hello Princess!'"

Ooh how cute! But Puppo's a tad small to be a guardian isn't he? If anything, with as tall and strapping as Wolfe was, he didn't look as if he needed a guardian. This guy was dressed in nothing special, a pair of worn jeans, boots, plain shirt and really macho-looking gloves. Did I mention like Ryu, he seemed really well-built?

Yes, I notice such things.

"Can I pet him?" I cooed, leaning in a bit to peer closer at the playful Chow.

"Me too!" Grammy chimed in.

Father cut a sharp glance my direction, "Princess Sarasaland that wouldn't be necessary. I'm—"

"It'll be fine," Grammy cut him off, ignoring the funny look her son shot at her.

Wolfe walked up to the throne and removed the chow from his shoulder. He gently cupped the tiny puppy in his large palms. Grammy grinned, eagerly scratching Puppo's chin. As I rubbed between the Chow's ears, Puppo yipped happily, licking my hand affectionately.

I laughed, charmed by the darling Chow as Wolfe grinned, pearly white—and sharp—canines showing in his wide smile; So I was right, there was some kind of feral edge to this guy. Grammy managed to convince Father to take his turn to pet Puppo and after a few minutes of coaxing, Father did so reluctantly.

He looked very stiff, trying to ignore the puppy slobber accumulating on his lordly palms. You know, for a random choice on my part, Wolfe seemed like a great guy! Down to earth, easygoing, and a killer smile. Wolfe's goldenrod eyes were startling, in a good kind of way. I'd have to ask if he was wearing contacts because every time he looked around, his eyes reflected the light strangely.

"Hmmm," As Wolfe walked back in line to be with the rest of my suitors, Father glared despondently at his slobbery hand, "Thank you…Lord Wolfesbane."

"No Prob Emperor!" He chirruped, a familiar feral grin appearing.

I turned my eyes to the last suitor and felt my pulse race. Grammy smiled largely, sending him a coy wink as Father's eyes narrowed sharply. He was the tallest and brawniest of all my suitors. Last but not least was the notorious King Koopa.

He towered over all of his competitors, muscular arms crossed in a show of his infamous impatience. Blood-red eyes narrowed and body managing to be both perfectly relaxed and tense in the same token as he waited with a feigned anger.

Our eyes met and his fierce visage darkened. A cruel smirk slipped onto his face as he eyed me boldly. He spoke in a completely guttural growl, a voice several octaves lower than what I'm used to, "Don't think I need much of an introduction but here goes."

He smiled wickedly, rows of sharp white teeth glinting, "I am _the legendary_ King Bowser of the feared Darklands! Fabled demon lord, king of fire, fire-breathing legend, and master of disaster. My kingdom is the best; richest citizenry, wealthiest economy, the best education."

Bowser chortled darkly. Eyes narrowing, "I knew Sarasaland had a princess but they certainly failed to tell me how damn hot she is."

At the brusque compliment, I heard the castle staff murmur disapprovingly in hushed whispers and even a couple of my suitors shot dark looks his way. Father's already suspicious glare dropped from being cold and plunged into subzero territory.

Normally I would have been offended at such a barefaced, roguish compliment but I also knew when Bowser's deception was being implemented. Just as I had to pretend to be a dainty, womanly princess, he was required to be a stone-cold, ruthless dictator.

So while the murmurs of disapproval floated through the air in a soft buzz, for a split second I saw the true Bowser. The feral sneer had softened and the nearly lecherous glint in his eyes had all but melted away. For just a moment his face was not that of the tyrannical king, but my friend.

The message his eyes sent were as clear as day and it nearly had me blushing plum.

'You look beautiful.'

He sent a quick playful wink in my direction and by my next blink, he was gone. No longer was the flirtatious, fun-loving, silly Bowser present but he was the dictator and king of the Darklands. Arms covered in spike-embellished armbands and sinewy muscle revealed; the king Koopa was truly a terrifying and magnificent sight.

With carmine eyes narrowed, he stood as if he were simultaneously furious and impatient with all of us breathing the same air as him. It wasn't unnoticed how all my suitors stayed away from him, save for Ryu who didn't seem bothered and Wolfesbane looked as if he was sizing Bowser up as Puppo sniffed in the king Koopa's direction.

"Thank you…Lord Bowser," Did I hear a…growl in my Father's voice? If he was angry, it was well hidden, "And thank you all for all coming to our kingdom to see our fair princess. Supper shall be served in the dining hall at five pm and if you would like, you may rest in your chambers until then. We of the Sarasalandian court hope you enjoy your stay here and please feel free to ask a servant for any other accommodations."

Alabaster cleared his throat, "The Princess shall now take her leave."

I rose to my feet, blushing when I realized where the eyes of my suitors fell. Some lingered on my exposed legs–Bowser—whereas the pervs—like Zero and Taurus—dawdled on the plunged neckline of my dress. Some of the guys—Luigi and Silver—jaws dropped all too obviously as Wolfesbane held a grin. I had to fight back the blush burning across my cheeks.

"Tomorrow morning, we shall begin the tours of each of your kingdoms," I smiled at each of them, "I shall get to visit your homelands, learn your culture and I shall spend a night. So tonight you shall become familiar with my kingdom and customs. You may all feel free to walk through the palace as my servants would be obliged to give tours."

"And where shall you be, princess?" smirked Taurus.

"I shall be getting ready for dinner," I smiled thinly, "See you gentlemen in the dining hall at five."

I gave one last curtsy and with the aid of Alabaster, I walked down the hall. I made a beeline for my room, painful heels halfway off by the time I reached my door. I spun into my haven, slammed the door and released a deep sigh. I gazed at my overdone reflection one last time, disdain coloring my features as I rushed towards my bed.

With an angry huff I began to hurriedly yank apart the ribbons that held together my scantily clad dress. Impatience set forth and with a growl, I began to tear away at the artfully tied ribbons. I shot another scathing glare at my mirror and glared. The towering stilettos, the bone-straight hair and heavy make-up; Stars I looked like a high class escort.

"I'm so glad that was over with," I growled, "The shame of it al—"

"Well, well, well," a velvety voice spoke coolly, "I thought I'd sneak by to see my Queen and better yet I get a _personal show_."

Gasping, I spun around in a whirl of gracelessness and panic. I faced my intruder, hands scrambling to hold my dress onto my form. I glared at Bowser, cheeks enflamed as my voice squeaked girlishly, "Y-You overgrownreptile bastard! What are you doing here!? Y-You don't just rush into a girl's room an—!"

"Whoa, whoa!" Laughing, Bowser shook his head, "I was just pulling your leg. The whole time I came in here I had my eyes covered. I could hear the rustling of clothes before I stepped through the door."

I frowned, analyzing him a bit closer. Indeed he did have his claws stationed over his eyes. I stood awkwardly, holding my dress in place as Bowser began to stagger around the room like a child playing Marco Polo. I glanced over my shoulder at Firefly who watched Bowser's absurdity with big bubbly eyes.

"See? I can't see a thi—"

Teetering around blind, Bowser knocked over a bookshelf and created a cacophony of racket. Firefly ducked at the sudden noise, squeaking with a bit of worry. I groaned, slapping a palm to my face before reaching for his hand, "Look at what you're doing. You're even starting to worry Firefly. Here, take my hand."

I grabbed his huge hand and guided him to sit on my bed, "Just stay here until I'm ready alright?"

Even with his hand over his eyes, his large smile was more than obvious, "What? Can't I just take one _little_ peek?"

"If you do," I hissed, rummaging through my drawers, "I will kill you slowly. Firefly, make sure he doesn't peek!"

A chirrup of affirmation came from my loyal pet. Bowser growled, turning his head in Firefly's general direction, "Traitor…"

Firefly's syrupy giggles filled the air. I quickly pulled out a comfortable pair of golden silk pajamas and dressed quickly. Once decent, I took a seat beside the massive king, "Okay you can look now."

Bowser removed his claws and smirked. His ruby-red eyes swept along the length of my figure critically. I crossed my arms, glaring, "Yes Bowser. I have clothes on now so stop staring."

He bellowed with laughter, "Excuse mebut I just wanted to see what you looked like in pajamas. Forgive me for using my eyes," then he grinned with a promise of nothing but trouble, "By the way, has anyone told you how unbelievably amazing you looked? I would drink your bath water."

I blushed before I glared down at my knees, "What are you talking about? I looked like nothing more than an escort. L-Like a woman sultans and kings could purchase."

Bowser smirked, "Really? I didn't think that at all. Although I would prefer for you not to have worn that dress in front of those losers."

I glanced up, "Huh?"

"Only I should get to see you wear stuff like that," he winked playfully, "So…next time you come to my kingdom…Can you wear that dress?"

With a growl I took a nearby pillow and slapped him in the arm with it. Laughing, Bowser shielded himself half-heartedly.

"So do I take that as a no?"

"A_ hell_ no," I huffed, crossing my arms, then I shivered at a thought, "Stars those guys are creeps! Maybe I should be glad I wore a dress like that, it's easy to spot the pervs."

Bowser glanced in my direction, red eyes eerily cloudy, "Do you feel safe with me?"

I laughed dryly as I removed a clip from my hair. I walked across the room to my vanity, "Of course. Ugh some of those guys couldn't keep their eyes off of my bust. What pervs. They only want..."

I flushed, not sure I could vocalize their desires. Bowser's voice was soft as he titled his head inquisitively, "Want what?"

_I turned to peer at him, eyes wide; to ride me like a pogo stick!?_

Yeah, no thanks.

"T-They're creeps," I growled, running a comb through my hair, "Nothing else needs to be said on the matter."

I stopped fiddling with my hair when a huge claw rested lightly on my shoulder. I spun to face Bowser, whose red eyes were bright and intense like the sun at its apex, "What makes you trust me?"

Gobsmacked, I opened my mouth wordlessly before shutting it in confusion, "Huh? You're my friend, why _wouldn't_ I trust you?"

"Are you sure?" one long claw slowly slipped across my arm, "I don't want the same things they do?"

Again my mouth opened and closed, almost like an out of water Cheep-Cheep.

"I don't understand..." I said slowly, trying to read his closed expression.

His eyes were guarded purposefully, "What if despite being your friend, my motives of being close to you are just like theirs?"

"I told you," I rolled my eyes, fed up with a conversation that was beginning to go in a circle, "they're pervs, wanting their chance to...to...ugh Stars, have me in their bed."

A half-grin completed the mysterious expression on his face, "And if I wanted that as well...? In due time of course."

I snapped around to stare at him, mouth agape as his enigmatic smile stretched just the slightest bit. I felt my face blaze red with heat as he continued to observe my reaction with an all-too calculative calm.

"_B-Bowser_?!" I choked; startled wasn't a strong enough word to rely the strength of my emotion.

He seemed close, almost _too_ close as I could feel heat radiating from his massive form. He took a measured step forward and I scrambled back, still gaping up at him. We continued this strange dance and I realized he was backing me somewhere. His eyes were dark and hooded, the deep crimson of a rich maroon.

He continued to amble forward, pushing me to stumble backwards, "So what if I wanted you as well?"

Stars, w-where was this all coming from? I almost toppled over my own two feet, "B-But you...we know each other. And I've just met them and—"

And finally I did fall onto my rear, planting onto my bed. In the confusing flurry of open-ended insinuations and a thick atmosphere that was rapidly transitioning from shimmering to boiling, I didn't realize my flannel pajama top had slipped, shoulder bare to the cool air.

Bowser crawled over, grinning immorally as he rested above me. I continued to stare up at him as a claw drew on my shoulder with an unhurried pace. I squirmed underneath him unsurely; what was he doing?

"Most guys dream of having a beautiful girl. Am I evil to do likewise?" He purred.

"Erm...?"

We locked eyes and I found myself blushing. Why was he even doing this!?

He grinned, the intensity fading from his features, "You look terrified."

"Surprised," I squeaked, "Like…I think my brain shutdown. I'm that stunned."

He laughed before playfully nudging me, "I'm just kidding! Relax won't you!?"

Chuckling, he moved away and gently pulled me to my feet. My mind was racing; what the hell had that been all about? I settled for glaring at him as he smiled, "What in the world was that about? One moment we're talking about those princes and the next you're trying to corner me! Like what the hell!?"

He half shrugged, still grinning, "Can you blame me? You should have seen what you looked like today."

I lightly slapped the smooth surface of his plastron, "You're so crude sometimes."

"Crude or honest?"

I huffed, shaking my head, "Definitely crude."

Something about his expression remained cool, "Hmm."

We both fell silent, Bowser staring at me with a carefully guarded expression as I was frozen, unsure how to respond. What was going on here!? Why was he acting so weird? Did that dress fry his brain cells or something!? I felt so uncomfortable and I never felt awkward or unsettled around Bowser…

A half-grin tugged at his lips, "You should fix your shirt."

"Wha?"

I glanced at my chest and everything important was covered. I realized my shoulder had slipped out, a lime-green bra strap too bright against my brown shoulder. With an arch grin, he hooked a claw under the bra strap and snapped it against my skin. I squeaked, blushing crimson and hurriedly fixing my top as Bowser laughed softly.

I glared at him, face still flushed, "H-Hey! D-Don't touch _that!_ A-And will you shut up?! That's not even funny!"

"It is," he chortled, even as I punched his arm, "because you look soooo scandalized."

"Well y-you were _staring_!" I screeched as he continued to laugh, "What was up with that!?"

"Ooh a bare shoulder," he grinned large enough I could see his two incisors, "_Hubba, hubba_. Gonna get anymore racy there Flower?"

"Didn't I already tell you to shut up!?" I grumbled.

"Fine, I'll be good now," He grinned.

He shot one last sly look my way, "So this is where my Flower sleeps hmm?"

Bowser rose from the bed, now actively looking around the room. Smirking, he picked up a few of my stuffed babyhood trinkets and toys analyzing them. He stopped by Firefly, petting the baby fireflower before he continued his exploration. As he traveled to and fro, I hovered a few steps behind him, taking in all his reactions to the various objects in my room.

He grinned at the sight of my many trophies and sports equipment. In the midst of my trophies, Bowser plucked out a picture of me as a girl. His grin grew at the sight of the picture, "How old were you in this one?"

I hobbled around his large frame and studied the photo. In a bright pink frame, it was an image of Peach and I after a soccer game. With both of us wearing the same red uniform, Peach wrapped both arms around me as I winked, raising one of my arms in a victory sign.

Peach's hair was done in adorable long pigtails as a simple, messy ponytail contained my hair. Peach was perfectly clean and precious as I was covered in dirt and grime with my hair going in all directions. I was even missing my two front teeth.

"I think we were both eight."

Bowser set the photo back down and he stopped before a wall of photos and studied them with a keen interest. This wall was filled with many different photos of my life, ranging from the first day my parents placed the crown upon my head and was completed with images as current as the day I danced with Father during my Summani.

It was a perfect summation of my life past, present and there was still a large blank space for the future. A deep chuckle rose from the king as he plucked one of the pictures from the wall.

"And how old were you here?"

That one I knew by heart, "I was fifteen."

Bowser's red eyes slowly slid onto me as he smirked, "Just as I thought, you were too damn cute. If I knew you back then, I would have been trying to court a certain Desert princess."

As Bowser's grin grew, I felt myself flush at the unexpected comment; where all my childhood friends had thought I was mediocre and plain; there was someone who found me beautiful. He contently eyed the picture a moment longer before he placed it back on the wall. He moved over to another picture and stared at it, "Hmm, and who is this?"

It was black and white photo of a slender woman with long dark hair. She was seated before a mirror, smiling beguilingly at the camera. Even with the colorless photo it was easy to tell her hair was an attractive shade of ebony and her eyes were light and creamy.

I beamed and looked at Bowser, "Take a guess."

"Grammy?"

I nodded my head and grinned as Bowser chuckled, "Damn, even back in the day she was something else. Hey now, she was pretty cute! If I was alive back then I would have totally made a pass at her."

That made me laugh hard. He continued to study the photo, "She still kinda looks the same, just give her white hair and a few more wrinkles. I guess good genetics runs through your family."

"Yep," I spoke softly, "That was Grammy back in 1953."

Bowser removed another photo from the wall, "And this has to be mom eh?"

"Yep, that's Queen Rose of Sarasaland...My mother."

"Holy Stars," he breathed, "You look justlike her, except her hair is far redder than yours, like the petals of a rose. I'd be happy to have such a beautiful woman for a mother. Stars she's such a _babe _your dad just went up ten points in my book."

I laughed, "Thank you I guess, now that you've managed to hit on all of my predecessors." I glanced at the sweet face of my mother.

Bowser's face softened, "But you're just as beautiful as she is, always have been."

There was a soft knock on my door. Bowser arched an eyebrow at the sound of a new voice, "Princess Sarasaland? The dinner is within an hour and the king would love to have you present and ready before then."

"Ah yes, I will be ready by then, thank you!"

I turned to Bowser, "Well you are free to go now, I have to get ready for dinner I suppose. I'll change into my usual dress."

"What? You mean I can't stay here and—"

"_NO_!"

"All right, all right then. Guess I'll be seeing you at dinner time."

Just when I thought he'd gone for good, he stuck his head back in, "You know, if you want to wear that dress again tonight I'd be more than happy to—"

He slammed the door shut as an onslaught of pillows and stuffed animals flew towards the spot his head had been seconds earlier. They bounced off the door in a puddle of fluff and softness as Bowser laughed.

The table had been set with Sarasaland's most delectable cultural dishes and everyone helped themselves to what they saw fit. At least with dinner I was able to dress in my modest yellow and tangerine gown. The prepared banquet was delicious and extravagant for the princes as I dug out every single manner I could remember.

I ate beside Father, who seemed nonplussed and Grammy was on my other side eating meagerly. I would try to heap bigger portion onto her plate but she refused to eat anymore. Stars she could be so stubborn like a child!

The suitors ate quietly with the sounds of silverware clanking against porcelain and Bowser's occasion loud slurps. It seemed Bowser was content inhaling his food. I suppose it would look ridiculous if the lord of all Koopas ate daintily with human etiquette.

"Perhaps each suitor would like to tell share a bit about themselves?" Father's smooth tenor floated through the room with a rich texture, "Current projects? Milestones? Or maybe just current events? Or perchance you wish to share anything that's on your mind."

"Oh! I'll go first!" Chirruped Wolfsebane, "My favorite color is red because it's _awesome_! My astrological sign is Aries! I love riding Yoshis, Chows, and I can eat all day and—"

"What the hell is this?" Bowser muttered not too quietly from the other side of the table, "I didn't know we were on a really lame dating show."

His audacious statement caused a couple of the suitors to snort, holding back their laughter. Luigi almost even spit up his drink. I'm guessing Wolfe either didn't hear or ignored the comment as he continued on with a contagious glee.

"We've started a new line of pet care products—brushes, shampoos, medicine—anything, you name it!" As he was saying this, he was talking and eating, shoving another roll into his mouth as he gesticulated with vigor, "And it's been so successful! It's been so hard to fill out our orders!"

"Fascinating," Father continued to sip his drink, "It sounds like the Canine Clan has its hands tied for all the right reasons. Several years back I met your mother, Kitsune. I suppose she's still the clan matriarch?"

Wolfe nodded, half a grin sliding onto his face, "Of course Emperor. She says 'hey'. Anyways my people are really simple; for our livelihood we raise Chow."

"What's a chow? Like Ciao? Or 'I ate-a chow yesterday-a for dinner…? " Luigi asked.

"Are you dumb Greenstache? Apparently the bar for plumbing school was just as low as I thought it was," Bowser grumbled, rolling his eyes, "It's his damn pansy doggy-thing."

"Don't-a have to be a jerk about it," Luigi muttered.

"What was _that_?" Bowser arched an eyebrow as smoke curled from his nose.

Luigi laughed nervously as I interjected, "Ahem. Wolfesbane, if you will?"

"See him?" Wolfe hiked a large, tan thumb towards the mini blue puppy sitting on his shoulder, "He's a Chow. I got him on my fifteenth birthday. Been best pals ever since."

The blue puppy yipped happily before turning and bathing his owner with a wet, eager tongue. I grinned at the sound of Wolfe's hearty laughter. He seemed genuine and friendly. He must have sensed my stare as moments later amber eyes locked with mine and grinning toothily, he shot a wink my direction.

"Are your eyes real?" I asked dumbly, noticing the way they seemed to shimmer and gleam under the light's touch.

This made all heads turn my direction, even Wolfesbane blinked in stupor. Bowser looked particularly disturbed. I blushed, halting in the middle of a bite, "Erm…W-Well I mean…His eyes reflect the light really strangely? Has anyone else…noticed?"

"Sorry princess," Zero spoke blankly, "But I don't stare lovingly into the eyes of other men."

Taurus snorted.

"I noticed his eyes," Silver spoke softly, staring into his goblet of wine, "T-They are a bit peculiar to say the least…"

Wolfe laughed, "Aww I'm flattered princess! They're real, had 'em since the day I was born."

"I have heard the Canine Clan has perfect night vision," Ryu's voice was silky, "Is this true?"

"Yep," Wolfe fed another dinner roll to Puppo, "We have night vision, enhanced hearing and a great sense of smell."

"A great sense of smell?" Zero chuffed, "Says the man who smells like a pack of wet mongrels himself…"

Bowser laughed, almost snorting up his drink. I shot a dirty look at both of them.

"And what about your puppy?" Grammy, cooed, "He's just the cutest thing."

"We can communicate with each other," Wolfe scratched under Puppo's snout, "He understands every word we're saying perfectly. Heh, earlier he told me he thinks the princess is cute. Gotcha agree, Puppo usually knows a pretty girl when he sees one."

Again I blushed as Grammy chuckled, "Well then! Your puppy certainly has great taste in women! I thought I saw him paying a bit too much attention to my pretty little granddaughter...I'm keeping an eye on that puppy!"

"Grandmother," I hissed; Father chuckled lightly.

"Makes you wonder," Taurus whispered, "if those Canine people have been interbreeding with those chows they love so much. It would certainly explain why they look like beasts themselves."

Wolfe and Puppo's heads snapped in his direction. Golden eyes narrowed into predatory slits as Puppo growled softly. Bowser coughed into his fist, hiding a laugh. Did he really laugh at something Taurus said!? I reached forward and kicked him under the table. Luigi's eyes widened as he turned to give me a questioning look.

_Hehehe oops, must have kicked the wrong guy..._

"Um," a soft voice came from the nearly white-haired prince, Silver. When we all looked at him, his blue eyes averted as his cheeks burned red, "M-My kingdom is working on m-more medicinal applications with the h-honey syrup, red essence and maple syrup tonics."

Luigi's head shot up, "Hey! Mario-a used those in his-a adventures. They restore strength-a!"

"Yes," Silver smiled softly, eyes flickering in Luigi's direction, "We have been looking to improve the m-most current formula. It m-means a lot to our kingdom that t-the hero Marioendorses the u-use of our products. W-We hope to serve him well in his future endeavors."

"I used maple syrups on my adventures," Bowser's growl carried across the room, "Aren't you happy to have me use your stuff too!?"

All heads turned in his direction. Silver blinked, "R-Really? Did you travel with Mario on his adventures? Am I assuming correctly?"

"No. He traveled with_ me_," Bowser crossed his arms, gloating, "Boy, that short plumber certainly lies a lot. Lemme guess, he saved Peach from Booster? _Wrong_, I bust down that door at Marrymore, and who put Mallow's puffy ass back on the throne? I did. I kicked the teeth out of Smithy and yeah Mario sort ofhelped butIsaved the world. Don't forget that."

Several suitors shot a skeptical look at Bowser, who was still grinning contently. Understandably Luigi looked the most scandalized. Father arched a dubious eyebrow as Silver nodded his head, "Very well then. W-Were our products to your liking, King Bowser?"

"The red essence was pretty badass. The honey syrup was _okay_. But the maple syrup could have gone down a bit easier since it's syrup and I nearly choked to death but other than that, it's not too bad. So work on the potion, formula or whatever it is."

Silver blinked, appearing stunned. He looked as if he was trying to figure out whether he should be insulted or not. Again, I tried to kick Bowser under the table but something tells me I kicked the wrong man again. This time Silver raised an eyebrow as he slowly looked at me. I ignored him, feigning innocence.

How do they always know I'm the one doing the kicking!? Okay, when I kicked Luigi he was too much to the right and when I kicked Silver, he was too much to the left. Let's try the middle.

I blindly found a foot and stepped on it for all it was worth, glaring at the king Koopa. Bowser continued to shovel food down his throat; uh oh. I peered around the table and no one had a telltale 'what the hell?' look on their face.

Ryu savored his drink, eyes closed, Taurus and Zero were having a private conversation amongst themselves and Wolfe was feeding Puppo.

Weird…

I poked the same person again and this time Ryulooked my direction, arching a charming eyebrow with a grin. He had just been polite enough to ignore me. Oh Stars, so not only did I rudely kick one of my suitors as hard as I could but it was mister-sexy-clan warrior. I tried to mouth 'sorry,' discreetly across the table but such actions made everyone look at me.

Again I probably looked really awkward and I could swear Ryu's amusement was at my expense. Grammy leaned forward and whispered, "Pichi, when you play footsie with a man, make sure he's the right one!"

"Grandmother!" I hissed between my teeth, "I was n-not…! What makes you think I was…!?"

"—your favorite thing?"

"Huh?" I blinked, thoughts defogging as I recognized my name.

"The suitors want to know a little about you, princess," Grammy was beaming at me as if she wasn't goading me on seconds earlier, "Perhaps you could tell them a bit about yourself?"

"Umm…I love being physical…"

At the arched eyebrows, suggestive smiles and Father's blatant look of horror, I realized they were thinking I could mean something else entirely. Bowser raised an eyebrow slowly and grinned evilly; yup, they took that the wrong way, "I-I mean, like playing sports! Haha."

"What type of 'physical' activities do you enjoy?" Zero asked.

"I love soccer, it's my favorite sport," I smiled, making sure to look at them all, "I practice soccer every Tuesday."

"Your soccer footwork is b-beautiful," Silver spoke, "Your movements look effortless."

"Aww thank you," I beamed, watching his face glow red.

"I too have heard of your athletic prowess," Ryu half-smirked gorgeously, "Perhaps sometime you can show me your skills…?"

I gasped unintelligibly, cheeks smeared with heat as a full grin blossomed on his face. W-What kind of skills does he want to see!? Get your mind out of the gutter! He clearly meant soccer skills. Stars, hanging out with Bowser was corrupting my thoughts!There was a loud clatter of silverware, all eyes turned to Bowser.

"Y-Yeah!?" Bowser suddenly piped up, "Well I-I think you're the best soccer player I've ever known!"

"Thank you King Bowser," I grinned at him.

Bowser shot all the other suitors a smug grin before sipping his wine. Grammy looked his direction and smiled, "King Bowser, you have been unusually quiet this entire dinner."

He blinked, looking stunned, "Er..H-Have I?"

"Yes," she grinned, "Why don't you tell the other suitors about yourself?"

"Uh…" He must have remembered he was _the King Bowser_ as his ego re-inflated, "As you all know, I'm the great King Bowser, I rule the Darklands' kingdom—voted the tenth best place in the world to live, live in the Bowser's keep—the 3rd wonder of the world and have eight kids. That's all you other bozos should know."

"You have eight children?" Taurus asked, raising an eyebrow, "And if you're here I'm assuming divorced as well."

"Yeah," Bowser huffed, "And?"

"Shouldn't you tend your children? Eight children sounds like they'd need quite a bit of care," Zero smirked, sipping his wine.

"Wow," Wolfe whispered way too loudly, "_That's a lot of kids_…You could give away two kids...And you'd _still_ have a lot!"

Grammy hid a laugh as Father smirked, calmly sipping his wine.

"T-That would sound like a lot of work for Princess Daisy," Silver whispered.

"And I've-a fought those kids," Luigi shivered, "Those-a twins are insane! They once tried to roast-a Mario on a grill-a!"

"King Bowser, is this really the place you want to be? Wanting to marry a woman and suddenly forcing eight children into her care? " Zero's voice was so deadpan, his question sounded like a statement.

"I think finding a wife should be the least of your concerns," Taurus sniffed, "Perhaps a nanny would be more suiting."

"Gee," Bowser growled, "Should I make out the check to my shrink or you idiots!? Mind your own damn business!"

"Alright now boys," Grammy said sweetly, as if chiding children, "Let's all play nicely shall we?"

"However they do have a point," the sound of Father's polished voice made all conversation fall quiet, "There are many matters I'd still like to know about you myself, Lord Bowser. Perhaps you could entertain my curiosity for a moment?"

"Sure, fire away—"

"You've been kidnapping my niece for over twenty odd years," Father spoke casually, as if he were commenting on the weather, "And yet now you have suddenly become interested in my daughter. Did you think as a Father I would be placated by such a fact? Or did you hope the court of Sarasaland would magically disremember your dastardly past transgressions?"

Bowser blinked, "Well no…"

"You've tried to usurp the Mushroom kingdom for an incalculable amount of attempts and you've even been ambitious enough to try to rule the universe twice if Mario's personal narratives were anything to go by. And with each of those attempts you've used my niece as a bartering chip."

"Yeah…But I—"

"Let's not forget about the occurrence where you stole the sacred Star rod, a consecrated holy relic belonging to the great Stars themselves."

Thick beads of sweat began to dot the Koopa king's brow line as Father watched him with an unnerving calm, "Y-Yeah that was true…Erm I…Uh…Learned my lesson that day. But you know if the Mushroom Kingdom wasn't so easy to break into I wouldn't do it!"

Bowser laughed jokingly as the volley of quips continued between them like a tennis match. With each statement thrown, everyone looked back and forth between the two. Everyone at the table turned their heads to look at Father.

"Ah I see," Father poured himself a small glass of amber liquor, stirring the contents of his beverage, "So the Mushroom Kingdom's defense is terrible is it?"

Then everyone looked at Bowser.

"I-I didn't say that—"

"'Easy to break into' would imply a poor defense of the kingdom's militia, don't you think?" As Father sipped his drink, his blue eyes were bright and as cold as icicles.

All eyes trailed to Bowser again. Heck, even Puppo turned his head to get in on the action.

"I…didn't…mean that at all…" His left eye started to twitch.

"Then by all means, please _explain_ yourself," Father set his drink aside and made a show of giving Bowser his undivided attention.

Bowser growled, claws twitching sporadically as his temper began to fray. I'm pretty sure the proverbial hot seat Father put him in had to be _roasting his ass_. A part of me found this hilarious and the other half was curious as to why Father was going in on him so hard.

"I…You're…" Bowser was speaking through his teeth, trying to keep his temper in check as he slowly wound his trembling, shaking fists.

Taurus and Zero were completely amused, smirking audaciously as Wolfe grinned, chuckling. Both Luigi and Silver were kind enough to pretend they weren't witnessing the scene and Ryu as always looked perfectly serene.

"That's enough Emperor," Grammy said, touching a hand to Father's shoulder, "King Bowser undoubtedly has more than enough time to prove his merits."

"Very well, I suppose you are correct Empress," Father's eyes flashed once again, locking stares with Bowser.

Even as the other suitors were chattering amongst each other, they were _still_ staring; Father smirking and Bowser glaring. _What in the name of Star Haven was going on between them_!? There was no blinking, no moving—just _staring_! Like really!? Dinner was still going around them—Wolfe asking for another helping of pickled turnips, Zero and Taurus talking about stock market options—and they were staring each other down!

"The food here is really good," Wolfe mumbled through a stuffed jaw, "Excellent."

"Glad you think so," Grammy smiled.

Stars I hope this isn't some macho male crap…

And then all at once they both look away—as if they hadn't been glaring at each other for five minutes straight. Bowser growled, stabbing angrily at a half-eaten steak as Father sipped at his tea, fingers scraping against the porcelain of his cup. I was confused. Like really confused. Grammy leaned over and whispered into my ear, "Well, that was interesting don't you think?"

"I dunno if 'interesting' is quite the right word," I hummed thoughtfully.

Every now and then Bowser would shoot a glare at Father and vice versa. It was odd, when Bowser was looking Father returned a piercing stare from over the rim of his wine goblet. I don't know what friction was going on between the two of them but all I know is that these next few days will certainly be interesting.

"Would you like a drink my dear princess?"

I looked up and—oh! It was her! The beautiful servant woman who worked in my _Summani_. Her blue eyes glinting like jewels as she moved an errant strand of pink fringe behind her ear. Red lips curved into a supple smile as she offered a tray of beverages.

"Thank you."

"I would like to propose a toast," Taurus was standing on his feet.

We all raised our glass as he spoke, "To the princess."

"Long live the princess," The pink-haired waitress cooed, a sly smirk on her pretty face.

We clanked glasses and drank.

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><p>Alice: Read and Review! ;)<p> 


	20. King: The Joy of Fatherhood

(Two months ago)

Alice: Alrighty, I'm going to start writing on a new chapter...

(Computer freezes)

Alice:...(Taps on key board) Hello? Hello? Helloooo? Hola? Bonjour? Ciao? Aw son of a-

(One month, three weeks ago)

Alice: Alriiiiiight. It's time to update! Time to...Where's the wifi? Where's..?

News reporter: In today's news, a semi has hit a powerline and until further notice...

Alice: Okay...That won't be too long...Like a day or two right?

(One month ago)

Alice: How can I post without wifi!? Hmm...I see I need to take desperate measures. I may have to speak and deal with someone I can't stand...

(At Ultrra's house)

Ultrra: Use my computer? Sure, why not!

Alice: Really!?

Ultrra: Yeah, but just know you might have to share with a few people.

Alice: Your sister right? No problem, I'll-

Ultrra: And my mom, dad, sister, brother, cousin, uncle, aunt, grandmother, grandfather, great aunt, great uncle, great cousins, second cousins, God mother, God father, God sister-

Alice: O_O

Ultrra: My sister's friend, my brother's girl friend, my mom's doctor, dentist, the maintenance man, the plumber..

Alice: Wait, a plumber uses your computer!? T_T

Ultrra: Joe? Yeah! He's a cool guy, he's just gotta always wash his hands first!

(Two weeks ago)

Alice: How am I EVER going to update!? (Looks at cellphone) Ah haaaaaaa.

(Two days ago)

Alice: It...Is...completed...

Ultrra: Right, but it's probably full or errors, improper grammar, spelling, punctuation

Alice: (Eyes glow red) I SAID IT IS COMPLETED.

Ultrra:...And I hope the fans will enjoy your update. ^_^;

Alice: I hope so too. (sigh) Right! I will post the Q & A in a later chapter! (Crazy laugh) Since this whole process has been CRAZY! I felt so bad not updating in awhile! But here it is! A brand-spanking new chapter! ^_^

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><p><strong><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>**

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>Bowser dialed the videophone in his guest bedroom, precariously pressing the tiny human-sized buttons. He growled; these phones clearly weren't made for the large, masculine digits of a burning hunk of Koopa. He pressed the last button and waited for his call to be connected.<p>

Moments later the faces of his advisers appeared on the screen."_Good evening Lord Bowser_," they both greeted in tandem, inclining their heads.

"Hey you two," he smirked, "How are things? Is my kingdom still badass and sexy as hell in my absence?"

"_Things are simply smashing, your Rudeness_," Kammy replied in her usual crisp tone.

"_Yes and may I point out_," Kamek sniffled with pride, "_even though all of your demon-er-glorious children are home, the castle still stands. Not a single thing has been blown up._"

Bowser smirked, "Really? Anything burned down yet?"

"_Well.._." Kammy and Kamek shared a tired look, "_Let's not ask for miracles here sire. The twins _are_ presen_t."

"_And that means something will be destroyed_."

"Speaking of destruction," Bowser hummed, "Get the eight brats on the phone stat."

"_Of course Your Lordliness_."

"_At once Bowser_."

The next image to appear onscreen was the king's youngest child. Junior bounced around happily at the sight of his dad's face.

"_King Dad! King Dad_!" Junior was prancing around happily, stubby tail wagging, "_Hiya King Dad! I can see you_!"

"Hey there Mini-me," despite the gruff voice, the king's eyes softened just the slightest bit, "What have you been up to?"

"_Nothin' just taking drawing and painting classes. Wanna see my picture I made_?"

"Sure do kiddo."

Junior held his drawing up to the camera, revealing it to be a picture of him, his father and Daisy all holding hands. Bowser laughed softly; she was certainly becoming a recurring theme in his artwork.

_And I'm certainly trying to make that hot lil' number a recurring woman in my life._

The king half grinned,"Not half bad sprat, you're getting better. Where are your brothers and sister?"

"_Around. Want me to get them?_"

"Sure."

"_Oh! I just remembered!" _Junior grinned, "_Look King Dad, my tooth is getting loose!"_

Junior exaggeratedly opened his mouth, prying his gums apart and pointing at one of his baby teeth. Drool dribbled down Junior's cheeks as he held his mouth open and Bowser shook his head, chuckling.

_What a cute kid. Bit of an idiot but cute nonetheless._

"Oh!" Bowser feigned surprise, grinning at his youngest' excitement, "You know what? I think the tooth Koopa fairy might be visiting someone soon."

Junior gasped, "_You think it'll be me?! Me?!_"

"Hmm, maybe. I mean, the Koopa tooth fairy only comes around when a Koopaling's gonna lose their teeth. Someday you'll have nice fangs like your ole man's," And just to prove his point, Bowser grinned.

Junior's eyes gleamed like gems, "_Y-You think I'll have sharp teeth like you_?!"

"Someday kiddo," It took effort to keep from laughing; Junior always gave him the most laughs of his children, "But only if you continue to eat your veggies."

"_Yucky_," Bowser laughed when his son stuck out his tongue.

"_Okay, tell Mama Daisy I said hi_!" Junior waved,"_We're gonna come see-Um...Erm_..."

"What were you saying kiddo?"

"_N-Nothing! Hehe! Bye King Dad! Tell Mama I said hi._"

Bowser rolled his eyes, smirking, "Okay I will."

Moments later Wendy's pretty face appeared. She had a smile on her stylishly petal-pink lips, "_Like, Hello King Daddy_."

"Hello my little Sugarshell," Bowser's voice oozed with paternal adoration, "There's...probably no chance in hell the boys are behaving themselves is there?"

Wendy scoffed, taking out a glittery nail-file and attending to her claws with lackadaisical interest, "_Nope. So...like, how are things in Sarasaland? Better yet, have you romanced Dai yet? Like remember what I told you, she's a tomboy but she'll still like being romanced_."

Bowser arched an eyebrow, "How about you leave the 'romancing' to the pro, got it?"

"_That's what I'm worried about_," Wendy rolled her eyes as Bowser laughed, "_Serenade her. Like Koopeo and Juliette. No woman can resist being sang to, even if the guy's voice is terrible._"

Bowser rubbed his chin in thought, "So girls really like that junk eh?"

"_It's not 'junk'!_" Wendy snapped, then she sighed, batting her eyes, "_It's sooo dreamy_."

"Huh," Bowser raised an eyebrow, "Well I better not find any 'koopeos' trying to romance my little sugarshell."

"_I'm not little_," Wendy huffed, "_I am a budding, beautiful young koopette_."

"Right," Bowser barely held in his laughter, "find another sibling will you?"

"_Okay,_" she smiled, "_Tell Dai I said hey._"

The phone tag continued as Iggy appeared, a small smile on his face, "_Hello King Dad_."

"Iggy! How are you kiddo?"

"_Good. Thank you for asking and you_?"

Bowser smirked; could you believe it? Somehow he managed to bring up a well-mannered Koopaling, "I'm fine kid. Everything okay at the keep?"

Iggy rolled his eyes up in thought, "Y_es...everything's okay._.."

Bowser chuckled; the castle could be burning to the ground and filled with Koopa-eating zombies and Iggy would manage to be 'okay'. Iggy was easily the most low maintenance of his children and didn't ask for anything.

"Iggy you're a good kid," A smile quirked on the king's face, "In fact I know sometimes with how crazy your brothers and sister are, it's hard to have your voice heard."

Iggy bobbed his head agreeably, still listening to his father.

"So if there's anything at all you want, lemme know."

"_Okay_," he replied back in his usual soft voice, "_Um..._"

"Yeeeees?"

"_W-well, I don't think I want anything._.." He shrugged half heartedly, "_B-But thank you for the kind offer King Dad_."

"Nothing? No allowance? New cooking stuff? We all know you want to become a chef some day. Hell, your food is gourmet already."

Iggy's cheeks flushed pink at the praise, "_T-Thanks King Dad._"

Bowser rubbed his chin in thought, "So nothing at all huh?"

"_No I'm perfectly content_," he smiled, "_Everything in my kitchen is brand new, King Dad. S-Some of the pots are still sparkling_."

"Well," Bowser grinned, "Want a girlfriend?"

Iggy glowed red, the blush beginning to snake down his neck. While Bowser laughed, Iggy shook his head vigorously and looked away, "_I-I don't want a g-girlfriend!_"

Bowser grinned; Ah the shy ones were always so much fun to toy with, "Want me to find you one? I met this one cute koopette; red hair, purple eyes, she's a lil cutie. I think she'd look good beside you."

"_N-No, it's a-alright King Dad. Reall_y!"

"Alright then. You know the drill, pass the phone on to-"

"_King Daddio_!" The twins chimed in.

Iggy blinked, surprised as the twins suddenly appeared on either side of him. He slowly slipped away, least he attract their attention and become their next target.

"_Lookin' good King Daddio!_" Lemmy piped up, "_On the phone you look less fat_!"

Bowser raised an eyebrow, "What did you say...?"

"_I said you look buff._"

"That's what I thought," Bowser snorted, "You two clowns better not be making trouble for Kammy and Kamek."

"_What? No!_" Lemmy replied, sounding askance at such an accusation.

"_Yeah, I mean we've only blown up half the keep, broke every sacred artifact and got arreste_d."

"_We tried to blow up the kitchen_," Larry said nonchalantly, _"but that Kammy ruined our fun!_"

"_Damn!_" Larry hissed.

"Hey! You damn brats watch your damn mouths! No swearing!" Bowser growled.

The twins looked at each other, "T_he irony is sooooo telling in that statement._"

"_So King Dad, any progress with the mamacita_?"

Before Bowser could reply, Larry cut in, "_And in case you're too stupid to get that we're talking about Mama Dais_y."

"Stupid?!" Bowser's left eye began to twitch, "You better pray I don't come through this phone and-"

"_Have you wooed her yet?_"

"_Romanced her?_"

"_...Is she pregnant?_"

Bowser snarled, "When I get back home I'm going to ring both of your necks, steal a time machine, go back in time and then ring your necks again!"

Both twins laughed obnoxiously, eyes gleaming wickedly.

"_Oh princess Dais_y," Lemmy groaned in what was a really unflattering mimic of the king's voice, "_Will...Will you rub my body down with mayo and honey? I have sick fantasies I only want to carry out with you._"

"_Oh teeheehee!_" Larry giggled, batting his eyelashes in a girlish manner, "_I thought you'd never ask King Bowser!_"

"_Oh princess,_" Larry continued, in his Bowser mimic, "_You should know my nipples are sensitive_."

"You little knuckleheaded bastards!" Bowser's furious roar only had them laughing harder before they hurriedly fled the scene of the crime. With a growl, Bowser massaged his temples as the pound of a headache came on. Moments later, Roy's smug visage filled the screen, "_Yo king Pops, how're tings in the desert goin'_?"

"Fine," he grunted, vexation still clear on his face, "You haven't been making any trouble for Kamek and Kammy have you?"

"_Aww King Pops I've been a friggin' saint. I've been only workin' out and kick boxin'. You should see how strong I got!_"

"How much are you bench pressing these days?"

"_Almost ten tons,_" Roy looked pleased. Then his smile turned sinful, "_So...you makin' her scream yer name yet King Pops_?"

Red brows furrowed, "Making who scream?"

"_Dat human broad. You know, da one wit huge blue blinkers and legs fa days_."

The neurons in his mind finally fired and he 'got' what his son meant. Bowser frowned, "She's a damn good friend Roy. And I won't have you saying crude things about her. She's a lady alright? Treat her like one."

Roy raised both eyebrows, "_King Pops...I'm startin' ta tink you really like dat girl. But if you like 'er so much, den why aren't ya tryin' ta bang 'er?_"

"Because she isn't a one night stand," Bowser snarled with venom, "I see we're gonna have to have a talk about this later."

"_Gee that sounds great but-Oh look_," Roy suddenly grinned, "_Here's Morton. Lata King Pops._"

Bowser growled, shaking his head; he saw a lot of himself in that kid and not in the good kind of way. He was arrogant, bullheaded and had far too much interest in 'hitting and quitting' girls.

_'Yeah, back when I was his age girls terrified the hell outta me. And then...well..things happened, heh lots of things happened and then girls weren't so scary. Of course becoming drop dead sexy helped too...'_

"_Hello King Dad_," Morton smiled brightly, "_Is your stay in Sarasaland pleasant and well?_"

And then you had this kid, who was probably his direct opposite: polite, articulate, warmhearted and completely nonviolent.

"Its been good Morty. Have you been working on more sound productions?"

"_Oh yes_!" He nodded his head vigorously, "_I will work on a beautiful ballet recital! It will be great!_"

"Good," Bowser laughed at Morton's infectious mirth, "And make sure you watch the twins, I don't trust them a lick."

"_Okay then, anything else King Dad?_"

"Get big bro will you?"

"_Very well. Tell Mother Daisy I said my greetings_," Morton smiled before Ludwig's cool features appeared.

"_Father..._" An acknowledging nod.

"Ludwig..." A slight head nod.

And then silence.

Every now and then, the only sound made was a muffled cough from Bowser or Ludwig running his claws through his blue mane.

This was_ awkward._

The Koopa king would rather gather his biggest foes, throw them a celebratory feast in their honor and give a press conference naked than take this phone call. _Heh, that's a pretty funny thought. Could you imagine Mario being in the front row? He'd just probably be jealous. And invite Peach too, just because she'd realize Mario could never measure up to my...'glory'. And then she'd dump him permanently._

"So..." Bowser began unsurely, as he tugged uncomfortably at the scruff of his shell, "Wrote any new music lately?"

"_I've published a few,_" Ludwig replied.

"Oh that's good..." Bowser nodded, not knowing what to say.

"_Indeed..._"

Then a stretch of silence again.

Yeah...That naked press conference wasn't looking too bad right about now...

"_How.._." Ludwig cleared his throat, "_How is the princess_?"

"She's well," Bowser replied almost too eagerly.

Ludwig nodded his head, blue eyes roaming over anything but the figure of his parent, "_I should tell you we're going to arrive in_-"

"_Larry! Go long!_"

"Oorah bro!"

Ludwig blinked and snapped his head around at the unruly commotion. A football sailed over his head and smashed directly into the lens of the camera. The picture degenerated into squiggles of static. Bowser sighed before rubbing the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index claws; his kids were absolute monsters.

He smirked.

But they were _his_ monsters.

* * *

><p>My suitors were gathered for breakfast in the dining hall and Father had an unexpected meeting to attend. Grammy was stationed to my right, passing the time with plenty of amusing anecdotes and tales.<p>

Every time she thought I wasn't paying attention, she'd try to hide or skip taking some of her medicine. That's why I always carried extra on my person. Because my grandmother was stubborn like a bull!

Ryu, Taurus and Silver ate with perfect decorum whereas Luigi, Wolfe and Bowser ate like barbarians. It was mayhem amongst Bowser's loud slurps, Luigi's grunts and Wolfe had his face buried in the plate, fork a silver blur as he tirelessly ate.

I laughed when I realized Puppo was eating in the same plate as his owner. Understandably Taurus's nose scrunched up with disgust at their display whereas Ryu looked amused and Silver looked to be turning green.

Bowser slammed his plate down with vigor, grinning viciously,"Done!"

Luigi sighed, "Mama Mia! It's-a just impossible to beat him!"

Wolfe grinned, "Man, you are good. Hats off to you King B. But don't worry, I'll win _sometime_..."

Puppo barked agreeably as Wolfe pet his guardian between the ears.

"Disgusting," Taurus shook his head, nose scrunched up, "It's a shame fine manners can't always be bred into others."

Wolfe laughed, "Can you believe this guy? He needs a tall glass of shut the hell up."

I was surprised when Ryu of all people laughed.

"Alright boys," Grammy smiled, "Let's settle down and eat our meal. That way I can tell you about the time I got my first tattoo."

This caused Luigi to spit out his orange juice, Bowser to choke and dropped jaws all across the table. I looked up immediately, cheeks flushed with anger and embarrassment.

"_G-Grandmother_?!" I gaped, transitioning into Sarasalandian, "_What in the world_!?"

She laughed, clapping her hands together, "Oh I'm only joking dears! Let's not be ridiculous!"

"T-Thank the Stars," Zero muttered.

"I had the tattoo removed years ago."

I almost spit up my beverage. Bowser burst out laughing. I shot him a glare and he grinned. The doors to the dining room broke forth as our servant ran in, a flurry of excitement and swinging arms, "Queeeeeeen! Priiiinceeeess!"

I blinked, stopping a spoon of pudding to my mouth, "Hmm? What is it Alabaster?"

"Settle down Alabaster," Grammy grinned, "If you wanted a blueberry muffin, then go ahead and ask! The bakery makes plenty."

He stopped and hunched over, panting, "There's Koopalings here. T-There's eight of them and I think they want to do us in!"

"Oh," Grammy smiled pleasantly, "Sounds like we have visitors."

"Visitors?!" The toad cried out, "Your grace, they're Koopalings! They're invaders more like it!"

"Oh Alabaster," Grammy laughed, "see to it you let them in, will you? They may want breakfast."

"Koopalings? Like young Koopas?" Silver asked.

That finally received Bowser's attention,"Huh?"

I looked up, "Does one of them have wild blue hair?"

"Um, I think it's safe to say they all have really crazy hair!" Alabaster cried out, "Either that or really bad fashion all the way around!"

Bowser grinned, "Well, seeing as I'm in Sarasaland and the Darklands is miles away, there's no _way_ those could be my-"

"Good going idiot! It's totally ruined!"

"Well maybe if you didn't whine so much!"

"Anyone wanna pull my finger?!"

The door to the dining room exploded open in a cacophony of ruckus and in came the Koopalings, louder and more boisterous than a Yoshi stampede. The shock on Bowser's face was comical; eyes bulging and jaw dropped as his children flooded around him in a torrent of chaos and energy.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Kiiiiing Daaaaad!"

"Yo King Pops!"

"King Daddy!"

The twins ran over, standing on either side of the king as they jabbered away. Wendy grabbed her dad's arm, yammering away as Junior leapt in Bowser's lap.

"King Daddio pull my finger!" Larry grinned as he shoved his index claw forward.

"Screw that handsome bastard," Lemmy replied, "Pull mine!"

"Curse that handsome devil! Pull mine sire!"

"Drat that sexy fox! Pull mine!"

"King Daddy!" Wendy cooed, "I like saw the most glamorous hair bow and I must have it! It'll look sooooo pretty! It only will cost ten thousand coins. And these diamond heels? OmiStars, its to die for!"

"King Dad!" Junior was standing in his dad's lap, tail wagging with zest, "Surprise! We came to visit you! Do you like it? Our surprise?"

"So I saw dis dude and he was like 'You tink you're tough?' And I was like 'I'll kick your ass!' And know what happened next King Pops?" Roy put up his dukes and hopped around like a boxer, "Boom! Crack! Thunda and lightn'n rained down on dat ass!"

So while they all were jabbering away at once, it seemed like Ludwig, Iggy and Morton had enough sense to remain quiet.

"Okay! _Okaaaaaaaay_!" Bowser roared with a hilarious, crazy 'I'm-at-my-wits-end' expression on his face. It even looked like he went cross-eyed for a few seconds, "Yes Junior, you surprised me; atta boy Roy; no Wendy you can't have that bow and Lemmy and Larry, shut UP or I will choke you out in public!"

Wow; he understood them all?!

"How in the world did you hear them all?" I was both awed and impressed.

In one fluid motion, all eight Koopalings turned to look at me.

I froze; should I be worried?

Then a resounding,"Mama Daisy!"

And I suddenly found myself as the object of their affection. I was hugged by the twins, Junior crawled onto my lap as Wendy began to braid my hair.

"Stars look at you," Wendy sighed as she continued to French braid, "I leave you alone for one second and this is what your hair looks like..."

"Mama Daisy!" Junior plopped himself in my lap, hugging my torso, "I missed you!"

"Foxy Mamacita!" The twins grinned, "We are graced with your presence again!"

Larry waggled his eyebrows before kissing my hand. Then Lemmy shoved his brother aside and kissed that very same hand. I laughed as they began to 'fight'.

A new Koopaling I hadn't met before appeared. Like most of Bowser's sons-save the twins, Iggy and Junior-he was muscular, tall and hulking. His devil-may-care grin sharpened as he leaned in towards me, resting an elbow on the table. I blinked, we were inches away from each other.

Somewhere behind him, Ludwig shook his head.

"Hey there Gorgeous. Tha name's Roy," he spoke in a deep, rumbling bass.

"Oh. Well hey there yourself Roy, I'm Daisy."

"No, what you are is hot," he grinned, "how are you today?"

"Fine."

"Damn straight you are. You know, normally I don't do this but you're actually worth showin' my eyes to."

He raised his shades just long enough to shoot a wink my way. Like Morton and Bowser, his eyes were a ruby-red.

"So now that I showed you somethin'," his grin stretched, "How about you show me a lil' ...somethin' special?"

I turned to Grammy and we looked at each other. Then I exploded with laughter. She turned to look at Roy, eyebrows raised, "Oh my, a smooth-talker huh?"

I laughed so hard tears were starting to speck the corners of my eyes. His cheesy lines nearly had me doubling over. Roy's arrogant grin faltered just the slightest.

"What the hell Roy?!" Bowser snarled as he grabbed his son by the cusp of his shell, "I ought to shove soap down your throat 'til you choke up bubbles!"

This only made me laugh harder. Bowser shot a wary look my direction, "I was going to apologize for this knucklehead's trespass ..but you're really yucking it up..."

"I thought Junior was just like you Bowser, but he is your clone!" I laughed.

Bowser raised an eyebrow so high it almost disappeared into his hairline,"And what are you implying with that statement?!"

"I know a mini Bowser when I see one! You've got the same cocky attitude, the 'lady-killer' moves, the evil grin, everything!" I laughed, his frown only made me chortle harder, "I think its cute."

They both recoiled with an almost identical expression of repulsion, "_Cute_?!"

This time Grammy laughed as well.

The surprise on Roy's face changed into anger, "T-That's not cute! I'm tryin' ta pick up on you!"

Bowser looked offended, "You can't be serious!?"

"Very cute," I beamed; I didn't mean to agitate him but I couldn't take him seriously after all that.

Ludwig couldn't hide the smirk on his face if he tried. The twins on the other hand...

"Reeeeeeeejected!" Larry sounded like a game show host.

"Heeeeeeee's outta here!" Lemmy boomed even doing the umpire out signal.

Roy growled, shooting a dirty look my way before stomping off. And to take his place, the hulking form of Morton appeared. He was smiling, tail wagging amicably.

"Hello Mother Daisy."

"Hey there Morty! This is a surprise!"

"Right. It was quite rude of us not to have alerted you of our visit. We are sorry for such bad etiquette."

"It's fine," I grinned, jabbing him in the side good-naturedly.

Then something hit me, "Wait...how did you guys get here?"

Bowser's stare sharpened, "I've been wonderin' about that too..."

"We took King Dad's clown copter!" Junior piped up, "And we flew it...Oh...Oh crude I said too much!"

"_Junior!_" The Koopalings chorused.

Bowser froze, "You did _what_ now?!"

"Great job runt!" Roy growled.

"You weren't supposed to say anything brat junior!" Wendy hissed.

"You're all here and safe that's all that matters, right?" I smiled.

"_Wrong!_" Bowser rose to his feet, snarling "Is my baby safe?! Oh you kids better pray, 'cause if I find _one_ scratch...!"

"Well," Larry spoke with a very even voice, "at least he won't find a scratch."

We went outside the palace and Grammy ribbed me in the side. Her blue eyes glinted, "So when were you going to tell me about this 'Mama Daisy' business, _Pichi_?"

"I didn't think it was such a big deal!" I scratched my head, "its just something the Koopalings do..."

"I think its darling," Grammy's smile softened, "They really admire you, adore even. Especially the youngest one. He's such a cute little thing."

"Junior," I smiled, "He's the most adorable thing on two legs."

Grammy's expression became a bit severe, "Be kind to those children. If they're calling you 'mama' then be sure to be the best 'mama' to them."

Stunned, I turned to look at her, "Grammy? What do you mean?"

There was a loud, ground-shaking roar.

I stared. Grammy grinned, "I'd bet thousands of coins King Bowser isn't pleased."

"That's pretty obviou-"

She leaned in, "Bet he'd feel better with a kiss, don't you think?"

And after dropping an atomic bomb, Grammy walked away, just as daintily and as prettily as a female monarch should. The running score was Grammy: ten thousand, Daisy: zero.

After a serious blush-fest, I joined the others once my face wasn't aflame. I strolled into our palace's front courtyard, ignoring the statues of my ancestors and elegant flora. I walked past another stone ancestor and found the wreckage.

Wow. This was worse than I thought. The Koopalings decimated Bowser's pride and glory. The battered clown car laid under a broken statue as a thin line of black smoke trailed from one of the engines.

The usual, evil grin on the clown car looked like, 'X_X'

I covered my mouth as laughter threatened to bubble up. Bowser looked furious, left eye twitching, fists curled and mane bristling. He went over to the smoldering remains of his once beautiful? Clown car and kneeled.

He stroked the smoking wreck as if he was tending to a scared child.

It was...disturbing.

"The custom pearl paint job, rainbow-finish wax, badass star-titanium propellers," Bowser whispered, petting the car reverently, "The custom leather chairs with the built in massages..."

"He's taking this worse than I thought," Lemmy whispered to Iggy.

"King Dad always did love his clown cars..." Iggy bit his thumb in worry.

"Shh, its okay," Bowser patted the scratched-up surface, "Daddy's here for you baby..."

"He's talking to the car," Wolfe whispered to Luigi, "This is_ really_ weird..."

"Yeah but don't say that-a to him," Luigi gulped, "he-a might try to roast you."

Bowser, still kneeling had his head bowed in what I assumed was a moment of silence for his... totaled clown car. Stars, I hope he's not having a mental breakdown over this...

"Do you know," he whispered, spiny back facing us, "How many times I kidnapped Peach in that car?"

At this I sweat-dropped; uh what?

"Uh ten?" Roy guessed, and poorly at that.

"How about-"

"Twelve thousand, five hundred and fifty," he was still petting the side of the totaled clown car.

Petting? Really Bowser?!

"I see," Ryu nodded his head, "This was your first vehicle you ever owned."

"My fifth," Bowser replied.

_Fifth?!_

There should have been a loud record-scratch sound effect added here. I raised an eyebrow; he was having a fit over his fifth car?!

"Okay wait a minute," Wolfe made a noise between a laugh and a snort, "You're this mad over your fifth car?! If it was your first...then okay...but fifth? Come on man."

Silver laughed softly, "It is a bit ridiculous, don't you think Lord Bowser?"

"I was Ludwig's age when I first got this!" Bowser snapped, "I learned how to drive in this baby...This was back in the day before Mario had that ugly mustache and Peach still had freckles!"

Wow, I didn't know she had freckles. Guess you learn something new everyday.

"So..." Zero spoke slowly, as if trying to make sense of things, "you didn't know how to drive your other four vehicles prior to this one...?"

Again there was silence. Well not anymore since Luigi and Wolfe were poorly holding in their laughter and snorts.

"...And what's your point?!" Bowser snarled.

Zero blinked, "It sounds like you totaled four previous cars you didn't even know how to drive. _That's_ my point."

Luigi was doubled over, laughing at this point.

"Oh, I understand, King Bowser. Just ignore those boys," Grammy smiled, dropping to her knees to hold him, "I can tell this meant much to you."

"It did my Queen," Bowser sniffled.

Sniffled? Oh Stars this is getting ridiculous. He's freakin' rich! He can buy another one just like this one without making a dent in his bank account!

"All the memories, all the girls I had in the back of this car..." Bowser spoke, "I got this thing so steamy...it was a flying loveshack."

Eyes widened and jaws dropped. And then Luigi was laughing even harder. Grammy laughed full-fledged, completely improper for a queen. Silver looked expressly uncomfortable as his cheeks glowed pink.

"King Pops?!" Roy grinned, "You were gettin' it in?!"

"Crass much Roy?" Ludwig asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Stick up tha ass much, Ludwig?" Roy spat back with a growl.

"Maybe so," Ludwig replied without a single inflection in his voice, "but I'd prefer that then being simple and ignorant."

"Big talk," Roy growled, stepping into his face, "for a Koopa so scrawny and weak."

"He's not puny Roy-boy," Larry replied, "I mean, you seen his abs?! Luddy should put out a work-out tape!"

"Yeah," Lemmy appeared, trying to diffuse the situation as well, "You're just super huge bro!"

I don't think either boy was listening as the two eldest Koopalings stared each other down, fire and ice meeting in deadlock.

"Easy boys," I stepped between them, "Your dad is...grieving."

Ludwig's glacial stare broke first, "Right...'Grieving.' Hmm."

Roy sneered before he turned back to his dad.

"All those wild nights," Bowser whispered.

"K-King Daddy!" Wendy blushed, glowering at his words,"Like gross! Just stop please! Ugh!"

"Mama Daisy," Larry was grinning at me, wiggling his eyebrows, "Would you like to join King Daddio in the back of the clown car?"

He received three slaps to the back of his head; one from Ludwig, another from Wendy and the last from Lemmy. Oddly enough Larry only seemed surprised at Lemmy's action.

"Why did you hit me?!" Larry sounded betrayed as he glared at his twin.

Lemmy, smirking, shrugged, "Because it seemed like the right thing to do. Besides the seats are on fire now so Mamacita can't go there."

Larry nodded his head sagely, "Right. Good point."

"Dually noted, I will be owed a compensatory slap in the future," Lemmy grinned.

"And it will be painful and funny," Larry nodded his head.

They both grinned. I stared; they were crazy.

Bowser rose to his feet, facing his children as he did. The king had an alarmingly ominous smile on his face. He walked towards the Koopalings, cracking his knuckles as his eyes blazed an eerie shade of orange.

If you ask me he didn't look very sane...I mean his left eye was still twitching.

Then he started to laugh, "Well, my little _darling_, _precious_ offspring..."

"Oh he's maaaaad," Larry whispered.

Bowser's insane grin only grew more fiendish," I finally have my excuse...my reason to end you brats! All these years of driving me crazy, breaking my stuff, making me tug at my luxurious mane, well now it's my turn to break you..."

"K-King Daddy?" Wendy whimpered, eyes huge.

"King Daddio..." Lemmy began.

The crazy grin grew larger on his face, "And I know _exactly_ who I'm gonna start with first. You twin bastards will make a nice rug in my personal office..."

As Bowser loomed closer, grinning hellishly, the twins screamed girlishly as they hugged each other.

"These fourteen years have been nothing but pure awesome Lars!"

"I'd be your twin again in another life Lems!"

Oh Stars, Bowser was going to murder his children in broad daylight!

"Grammy, we gotta stop him!"

I looked towards my suitors for help. Wolfe looked utterly amused as Luigi turned to me and shrugged. And Grammy just seemed content to watch it happen.

"_Luigi_!" I gasped.

"What-a?" He said too carelessly, "Those-a twins are evil. They tried to barbecue me-a once!"

I ran in front of the incensed king, pressing a placating hand to his plastron. I was surprised he stopped his death march. He looked at my hand on his torso and then back at me.

"Um...we should hear them out first King Bowser," I looked at the Koopalings, "There must be a good explanation for this."

"We only wanted to see you Mother Daisy," Morton spoke, "We did not mean to destroy King Dad's quite precious clown car."

"Destroy?" Bowser laughed darkly, "You _devil seeds_ annihilated my baby!"

"Who drove?" I asked.

And then silence. Either the Koopalings were smart or they had a no tattle policy as they all looked away and said nothing.

"I mean, it was crashed," I walked past Bowser and towards the smoldering wreckage. I bent down for a better look, "Really crashed."

Again, no one spoke up but I noticed Ludwig, despite the glare on his face, blushed. Also Morton seemed to grin largely.

Ah ha.

"This entire debacle has set us back," Taurus frowned, glaring at the Koopalings, "We should have left to the Moonstone Kingdom by now."

"Oh," Luigi scratched his head, "I forgot about-a that."

"So what are we gonna do?" Wolfe asked, "Mr. Stiffo is right. We're supposed to go to Moonstone land today."

"Moonstone _kingdom_," Zero corrected.

Golden eyes were rolled, "Whatever."

"We can't leave them here," Ryu spoke, "Most of them are innocent children. I think we should look after them."

There was a resounding silence from the other suitors. So much so that Ryu actually turned to look at the others, "...Or am I alone in my thinking?"

"You're not, Lord Ryu," I frowned, "We're not leaving them here."

"Oh yes-a we can!" Luigi chimed, "I'm-a not staying with those..." Then he whispered, "Monsters!"

"Luigi!" I gasped, both really surprised and amused. Then I started laughing.

"Daisy you-a don't know them like-a I do!" Luigi looked a little postal, "They've got lasers, guns, fireballs, cannonballs and they-a tried to barbecue-a me! _Barbecue_!"

Bowser sneered, "Keep on talkin' about my kids Green 'stache and I'm gonna pound you so far into the ground you'll be able to find out how hot the earth's core is through your ass!"

Taurus laughed as Zero made a considering look, as if he was picturing Luigi being kicked into the earth.

"Damn," Wolfe 'whispered' "That's pretty far."

Luigi recoiled, laughing nervously as Bowser loomed over him with ominous intent.

"D-Did I say they were bad? Oh no-a! I-I meant-a," Luigi gulped, "T-They're uh..."

"Uh..."

Bowser narrowed his eyes.

"D-Delightful?" Luigi squeaked.

"Alright," I said, "Looks like we'll go tomorrow. We can't leave the children unaccounted for. Or the broken car."

"Or the wrecked statue of the late Emperor Pierre Lightheart," Grammy seemed amused.

I looked over at the statue and blinked. My ancestor from the 1850's was now missing his head.

_Sheyt._

"My apologies," Ludwig spoke softly.

"Well, it's clear that guy has lost his head over the issue," Larry said in a serious voice.

"Right. Its gone straight to his head," Lemmy bobbed his head.

"King Dad always said to never lose our head."

"Right. He should take our advice."

A bubble of laughter rose as Grammy grinned. Thankfully Bowser's loud chortles nearly drowned her out. Wolfe and Lulu didn't bother to hide their smiles. At least Ryu pretended to cough.

I spoke in Sarasalandian, "_Grandmother! They made a joke about the statue of Pierre Lightheart being destroyed_!"

Of course Zero understood too, but whatever. Grammy made a considering look.

"I think it's very funny," Grammy replied in plain English, "And besides, that guy was a bastard and a half anyways."

I gaped as Bowser roared with laughter. I didn't bother to see the other suitor's reactions.

"Queen Meringue," Bowser was grinning, "You rock my world."

"Why thank you, O gracious king," she winked at him.

"The royalty of the Moonstonian kingdom is awaiting us," Taurus brushed a hand through his hair, "It's awfully rude to alter a royal's schedule because children have misbehaved."

Roy tensed, clenching his fists as he took an obvious step towards Taurus. Ludwig placed a hand on his brother's shoulder. He leveled Taurus with a cool stare, "Be cautious of your speech Aqualandian Prince."

Taurus paused before he grinned, "You're advising me are you?"

"Fair treatment begets fair treatment," his eyes narrowed, "or very hot fire."

"Damn!" Lemmy laughed.

"You were tooooold!" Larry laughed.

I shot a glare at Taurus before turning to prince Silver, "You don't mind if we spend another day here do you? I'm so sorry for the inconvenience."

"I-It's no problem princess," Silver smiled, "I'll inform my mother of the change of p-plans. It shouldn't bother her too much."

"Well," I smiled at the suitors, "Glad that's taken care of! Hey why not have a fun, relaxing day! We can walk through the garden, play a baseball game, anything!"

"Yeah!" Wolfe cheered, pumping a fist in the air, "Let's play a pick up game! How about a seven inning game?"

"How about a game at five?" I smiled, "Sun will still be up but it'll be cooler."

"Game time at five it is!" He chirruped.

"Ugh but its like hot now," Wendy groaned, fanning herself.

"I have a kiddie pool," I laughed, "it comes to my knees but it's in the garden. We can play in it if you'd like."

Wendy huffed, "Like, I'm not five princess."

"I'll play with you Mama Daisy!" Junior hopped around.

I smiled, "Okay! Great."

"Well," Ryu nodded his head, "the situation has been resolved with no casualties."

I grinned, "Thank goodness!"

"And nothing got out of hand," Prince Silver smiled.

"Threatening to choke out one's child isn't 'out of hand?'" Zero murmured.

"Well at least-a this didn't ended-a badly," Luigi laughed.

"Great Stars in Star haven," A new voice appeared, "What is...the meaning of all this mayhem!?"

_Uh-oh._

A flood of councilors flowed from the palace's entryway and into the courtyard. Most gawked at the accumulating smoke and wrecked aircraft. There were many furrowed brows and dropped jaws. Salini looked at his son for some kind of explanation.

Zero spoke, "Father, King Bowser's children flew the aircraft into Emperor Pierre Lightheart's statue and... deposited the aircraft here."

"Deposited or do you mean frickin' crashed and burned!?" Alabaster cried.

I caught sight of Father surveillancing the scene, "Was anyone hurt in the wreckage?"

"Only my baby," Bowser groaned.

Grammy tried not to laugh, "That poor thing has been decimated."

Bowser released a roar of despair.

"King Bowser," a councilor spoke, "This is an..._erm_ unusually bad landing, don't you think?"

"I didn't land this," Bowser snarled, left eye twitching. He cut a glare in the Koopalings directions and they all withdrew a bit, "My kids did."

Father looked at the Koopalings before he faced me, "And I suppose they are the reason your caravan hasn't left to the Moonstone kingdom."

"Right," I spoke to Father, " We've decided to relax for the rest of the day and resume our travels tomorrow if that pleases you, my king."

"That is fine if everything is suiting, Prince Silver?"

"Yes emperor, it is fine."

Father turned to Alabaster, "It appears we will entertain company tonight. Please alert the chefs and have the maids prepare our guest suites."

"Yes sire!" Alabaster saluted Dad before he ran off into the palace.

Bowser Junior walked over to Father and after examining him for a few seconds, tugged on his robes. The councilors gasped and gaped at the personal intrusion. Even Bowser looked alarmed by Junior's actions. Father looked down at Junior, mild surprise highlighting his features.

"Hi!" Junior chirruped, waving animatedly.

"Well hello there," I was surprised when Father took a knee to be eye-level, "May I ask your name?"

"I'm Bowser Junior!" He smiled, infectious smile glowing like the sun at dawn, "I'm named after King Dad!"

"I see."

Junior tilted his head, "Are you Mama Daisy's daddy?"

"Junior..." Bowser tried to discreetly hiss at his kid.

Father's eyebrows raised, " 'Mama Daisy'?"

I blushed as Junior nodded his head, "Yes! She's my mama!"

Father looked at me, a curious eyebrow still arched, "I'm afraid I did not know such a thing."

...Why do I smell a talk in my very near future?

Then he turned to look at Junior again, "Yes Bowser Junior, I am her father."

Junior squinted his eyes, "Hmm. That's weird, you look nothing like her. I mean, look at me and my dad. We look alike only he has lots of muscles! But don't worry, someday I'll be nice and muscly too!"

Junior flexed, even growling to impress my dad. A couple of councilors laughed as Bowser visibly looked uncomfortable. He shifted from foot to foot. The lightest smile graced Father's cool expression, "That's because she favors her mother. Similar to you and your father, Daisy is just as beautiful as her mother."

"Oh, okay! So," Junior beamed, tail wagging, "Can I call you King Grandpa?"

Then there was silence. Bowser for a rare moment looked horrified and even Father looked stunned. I was left speechless and so was everyone else it seemed.

Then Father laughed. It was a deep, resonating sound that made his face glow with mirth and appear years younger. Bowser appeared behind Junior and glared at him, "Alright kiddo, enough questions! Quit bothering the emperor!"

"But King Dad," Junior frowned, "He's Mama Daisy's dad so that means he's my grandpa!"

That had Father laughing again.

"_Bowser Morton Koopa Junior_," Bowser growled, shaking the Koopaling a bit, "Be._ Quiet_."

The emperor wiped a tear from his eye and stood. Bowser's expression altered apologetically "Erm, sorry for that emperor. And for my kids crashing a copter into your courtyard and destroying a priceless artifact. I'll pay for all damages and then some. You have my deepest apologies."

I blinked; was I finally seeing the King of Darklands in action?

He was a mature, strong leader who balanced being confident and imbued with noble character. Then outside of the crown he was a great, loving father and an amazing provider...

The object of my musings turned and looked my direction. I met the dark garnet-red eyes, the eyes of powerful, just ruler.

He was...

Amazing.

Blushing heavily, I averted my eyes. Grammy of course watched me like a hawk. The moment I looked at Bowser again, he was focused on Father.

"It is fine King Koopa though I admire your exceptional character," Father nodded his head, "The important matter is that your children are unharmed."

Father's face schooled back to neutrality, "If it pleases you, we would be more than happy to provide room and board for you and your kin."

"Thank you King Sarasaland, we graciously accept your generosity " Bowser inclined his head just the slightest bit, "I'm sure my children will be on their best behavior, _now won't we_?"

When Bowser turned to look at the Koopalings, there was blazing no-nonsense vibe about him. He was not to be tested and all of the kids fell in line immediately. There was even an audible gulp from one of the Koopalings.

"But Emperor..." Salini pressed, "the priceless statue of Emperor Pierre Lightheart has been destroyed...Let us take the Koopa king's generous offer and accept reparations."

"We will not penalize the gracious ruler for the... _exuberance_ of youth," Father then smiled at Junior, "And since you are staying for the evening, would you like to look around the palace? We have a bakery and I'm sure our chefs would love to make cookies if you'd like...?"

"Cookies?! Cookies! Yeah! Okay!" Junior was hopping around happily.

Just as Bowser was about to reprimand his son, I placed a hand on his shoulder. Junior ran in the palace, cheering loudly. Bowser looked uncomfortable as he rubbed at the back of his neck, "Emperor if you get sick of him, just holler and I'll come get the little tyke immediatel-"

"There will be no need for that," Dad smirked at him, "I'm quite fond of children his age."

"But what of the statue?" Another councilor asked.

Father made a pondering look, "If I recall history well, Lord Lightheart was of...unsavory character. We shall have the statue fixed at a later time. As you all were."

And with that Father strolled into the palace. Grammy turned to me and grinned, "See? I_ told_ you Pierre was a bastard!"

* * *

><p>After the servants and councilors had finally gone about their way, Bowser went to have a 'little talk' with his children.<p>

"We're in Flower's house," Bowser growled, "Don't touch, lick, sniff, poke, pat or break anything. I'm speaking to you, Larry and Lemmy!"

In a proud voice Larry spoke, "Guilty as charged."

Lemmy buffed his claws with pride. Bowser grabbed both of them by the scruffs of their shells and smashed their heads together. Roy exploded with laughter; that looked like something from a cartoon! Not that a manly, beast of a Koopa like himself watched cartoons anymore...

"Oow!"

"Okay! We won't break anything!"

"Stranger Danger!"

Bowser dropped them and glared at the others, "The same warning goes for you little _demons_ as well. Best behavior, got it?"

Iggy raised his hand. Bowser made a thoughtful look; Iggy was a good kid, if he had a question it would be harmless, "Yes son?"

"Um...C-Can we go now?" Iggy was twiddling his thumbs, "M-Mama Daisy is waiting for us in the garden."

"Sure but what is she doing there?" Bowser asked, genuine curiosity in his voice.

"She and Junior will play in a kiddie pool and I'm going to make them lunch," Iggy looked at his fingers, a pink blush smoothing over his face, "I h-hope she likes it."

Bowser's mind went blank. Flower in a kiddie pool meant she would be wearing a swimsuit. And a swimsuit meant he could study that killer, vicious bod and gorgeous pair of legs.

And of course let's not forget about that amazing rack. _Star damn.._.

Mentally Bowser was drooling, slobbering and howling to the moon. But with a calm face he told Iggy, "Have fun."

And I'll have some fun too, staring until my eyes fall out of my skull. Then out of the corner of his vision he saw the rising sun, the melodious sonata of beauty, and the abductor of his heart.

Princess Sarasaland was approaching.

* * *

><p>I stumbled upon what looked like the middle of a parental lecture. Bowser either heard or saw me, as he turned and looked my way. His stern expression softened up considerably as he turned to give his undivided attention.<p>

"You're not grilling them, are you?" I beamed.

"Like Koopa kabobs," Lemmy replied.

"But what doesn't make sense to me," Bowser rubbed his head, "is why are my chairs chewed up?"

"Chewed up chairs?" I frowned, "like eaten?"

"Like teeth marks," Bowser replied.

Again the Koopalings were silent. Bowser narrowed his eyes, "Alright. _Now _what are you little devils hiding from me!?"

The twins whistled and Roy 'suddenly' developed a really bad cough. I grinned; this was almost as good as a sitcom!

"Somebody better start talking," he growled, "'Cause when I find out what it is...I'm gonna be twice as pissed."

The ground startled to rumble, sand shaking and jumping. I felt stupid saying it but I asked, "You all feel that, right?"

Then I heard loud barking. I looked up and almost screamed. A gun-metal black chain chomp was on a rampage, barreling towards us.

"Chompy?" Bowser asked, surprise flooding his voice.

The chain chomp barked happily as it hurled itself into the air...

And landed right onto Bowser. I was surprised he managed to catch and hold the excited creature. Its large red tongue was licking at his face exuberantly.

"You kids..." Bowser grunted, struggling to fend off an aggressive, excited chain chomp, "Brought...Chompy?! What the hell are you thinking?!"

"He gets lonely King Dad!" Junior cried out.

"It was Junior's dumb idea!" Roy exclaimed.

"Well," Wendy hummed, "Like, Chompy was howling and baying at the moon. He like, wouldn't shut up til we took him."

"What in da world is 'baying'?!" Roy arched an eyebrow.

"Well, it actually means-"

"That you should get a damn dictionary, that's what that means," Larry grinned.

"Dat's it, I'm gonna-!"

"Enough!" Bowser snarled, "So that's what you got to say huh? It's Juniors idea-who's six by the way-And yet you all went with this?! Am I in the twilight zone or are you kids really that dumb?!"

"You'd be surprised how much dirt Junior has on us all," Lemmy replied with a straight face. I think he was serious for once.

"Yeah..." Iggy agreed, "_Lots_."

It had to be true as Wendy blushed and Ludwig coughed into his fist. Bowser instantly shot a surprised look at Junior. I burst out laughing at the too innocent look on the youngest Koopaling's face.

My Stars, Junior was a little devil. The chain chomp stopped trying to kill Bowser and started to sniff around. It looked in my direction and halted.

I froze; should...I run?

The chain chomp dragged Bowser as it was suddenly inches away from my face, sniffing and snorting. I stood perfectly still, because if this thing attacked, I was screwed.

_Screwed squared more like it._

The chain chomp fell silent. And then...

A long, wet tongue ran up the side of my face. I blinked, stunned as the chain chomp barked and licked me again. I began to laugh.

"Chompy!" Bowser began to tug on the chain, pulling him away, "Sit! Heel boy!

I was laughing as Chompy continued to lick me, purring. Junior rushed over, "I knew Chompy would love you! He always likes pretty girls."

Bowser's eyes snapped open, "_What?"_

"Oh?" I looked at the chain chomp and grinned, "So he's a player huh?"

The chain chomp barked before he nuzzled his face against my cheek, "He's so affectionate! How cute!"

I nuzzled my nose against the chain chomp, "Who's a good boy? Huh? Yes you are! Yes you are!"

Bowser's eyes flickered like lightning. One moment I was nuzzling and then the next the chain chomp was suddenly flung across the field. I gaped and slowly turned to look at Bowser.

He was grinning wickedly, arm still outstretched from the lob he performed.

"King Dad," Morton blinked, "Perhaps you should take up the hobby of 'shot-put.'"

"Chompy!" Junior frowned, "Why did you throw him, King Dad?!"

"Must've slipped through my fingers," he smirked.

I cut a look at Bowser, "Why did you launch the family pet, Bowser?!"

The king grinned, "I could explain but you just wouldn't understand it. It's a guy thing."

I raised both eyebrows, "a 'guy thing' huh? Try me."

Bowser watched as Junior and the rest of the Koopalings went to check on their beloved pet, "Oh it's...Just alpha male territory business and the like."

I rolled my eyes, "You're absolutely right. I wouldn't understand at all. The male ego is fueled by the dumbest things possible."

"Oh no, we're very easy to understand," he grinned, "A man's ego is simple: have good food, a place to rest your feet and..."

"And?"

His smile grew sharper, "And have a stellar, beautiful woman. You wanna be mine?"

I stared at him stupidly; eyes wide and mouth open. He gently smoothed a claw against my chin and grinned.

"Mama Daisy!"

"I...uh...I'm gonna see to the kids," and with that I turned and walked away from the glowing eyes of the king. As I walked away, I heard his laughter.

* * *

><p>It was noon as Ludwig walked around the palace, hoping to find a quiet place to find inspiration for his newest symphony. He walked with a Koopakindle notebook in hand as he went. The palace was too busy, too bustling with activity for him to properly achieve his ideal creative environment.<p>

The outside world seemed far quieter as he headed through an archway that promised of tranquility. One of the princess's suitors happened to be walking past. He was a young human male with pale, white locks of hair.

Ludwig bristled slightly, he was a man who was trying to marry the princess. The musician found himself feeling unusually challenged; mane standing and a low grow rumbling in his throat.

The human noticed his appearance and smiled politely. But instead of his usual nod, Ludwig slanted his eyes then ignored him.

The Darklandian prince ignored the human's fleeting look of hurt as he stepped outside. It was serene, quiet and absolutely perfect. A soft gale of warm air enclosed him like velvet swede. He closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of mother nature's warm fingers.

There was soft laughter and the essence of chaos had Ludwig opening his eyes. He followed the soft sound and after walking through several yards of shrubbery he found the source.

His eyes nearly popped out of his head.

Junior was sitting in a wadding pool, wearing swim trunks and beside him splashing in the pool was Princess Daisy. She wore a modest yellow one-piece, screaming and laughing as Junior splashed her.

Her tan legs and arms glittered with droplets of water, shinning like rhinestone under the sun's touch. Her curvy, toned figure drew in his attention. Belatedly Ludwig realized her neck was bare, hair pulled up into a messy cherry ponytail.

Koopas bit the necks of their mates to mark them as a symbol to other males she belonged to him...

His eyes honed in on the graceful curve of her brown neck. Then he noticed her tiny waist and the generous curve of her hips. His mouth watered and though he didn't realize it, his incisors elongated.

He crept closer and as his eyes narrowed only one thought crossed his mind.

_She was his._

"Ludwig?"

The thick fog around his mind evaporated as capriciously as mist. The water-splashing and laughter had stopped and all eyes were looking at him.

"Luddy?"

Iggy had spoken. Looked like he was in the midst of whipping up a pudding of sorts and both Daisy and Junior had stopped their fun.

"You okay big bro?" Junior asked, "you have a weird look on your face. Hehe it was kind of funny...Then super scary."

A blazing torrent of heat flooded him like a wave of fever. He had ignored its building intensity but now it was so bad, so strong he thought he would pass out.

_Am...Am I ill?_

"You okay Luddy?" Junior asked.

"Ludwig?" Daisy this time.

"I'm...fine..." He replied, he took in a slow, calming breath. Only to feel as if he was inhaling dense, humid air.

Daisy took a step closer and along with a breeze of honey and flora, a scalding, haze of fever struck him like a physical blow. His head swam and the back of his eyes burned. Throat parched and knees unsteady, he turned and left hurriedly, not realizing when he dropped his notebook.

Daisy froze, arm still outstretched and confusion on her face.

She turned to look at Iggy who shrugged helplessly.

"Should I go after him?" Daisy asked softly.

"Luddy's like that Mama Daisy," Bowser chipped in helpfully, "Whenever he's bothered he goes away and when he's happy again he comes back. Can we get back to our splash battle now? Pleeeeease?"

Daisy threw one last concerned look over her shoulder before she followed after Junior, "Alright then..."

* * *

><p>"<em>Hey batter, batter, swing batter, swiiiiiing<em>!"

In the golden Sarasaland afternoon the heat had cooled to a beautiful, tepid day.

"Hey pitcher, pitcher!"

The bases were loaded, the servants were cheering and the game was tied. It was the bottom of the ninth and I was up to bat. I stepped towards home plate, bat resting on my shoulders as I surveyed the scene.

The Koopalings and my suitors decided to play a game and it shouldn't surprise me Taurus 'had some business to take care of.' I lowered my baseball cap and narrowed my eyes against the sting of harsh sunlight; I was ready to win this game.

Ryu moved off the base, arms crossed as he stood at ready to dash for third. Wolfe was his second baseman, punching his glove with eager anticipation.

"Let's finish this game and wrap it the win!" Wolfe barked.

Playing catcher, Silver was decked out in full gear: face mask, chest protector and shin guards. At my approach, he squatted over homeplate and held his glove at ready.

"I'm s-sorry you have to lose," he smiled; I _think _he called himself talking smack to me.

"And _I'm_ sorry I'm about to hit a rocket off your pitcher," I grinned wickedly back as he laughed softly.

"Swing batter, _batter_~!" Wolfe sang teasingly from second.

"Don't miss Mama Daisy!" Junior called out from the dugout.

"Hit a homerun!" The twins called.

I twisted my leg, digging the toes of my sneakers into the dirt before I fell into my batting stance. Eyes narrowed, I focused on the pitcher. Standing on the pitcher's mound was the imposing form of the Koopa king. Under the hot sun he looked fierce, red mane ablaze and vicious game-face present.

Every competition Bowser took serious with vicious intent. He hated losing as much as I did and we both loved the glow, the golden glory of victory. The moment our eyes met, a hellish smile split his face, red eyes excited and flaming.

A pulse of adrenaline rushed through my veins like fire as the cheers of my teammates fed my ego. Wendy, Ryu and Junior cheered.

"I'm almost sorry I gotta do this," Bowser grinned, tossing the ball in the air thoughtlessly, "Its been awhile since something that pretty crossed homeplate."

I growled, tightening my grip on the bat. He was still smirking, "You come up here and give big daddy _a little sugar_ and I might consider going easy on you. Deal?"

"Throw the ball!" I hissed, cheeks pink.

A couple of the Koopalings giggled. Wendy even leaned in to whisper something to Morton. The soft-hearted Koopa laughed at whatever she had whispered in his ear.

There was the sound of something scorching and moments later the flicker of a flaming fastball tore past. I swung too late, let alone being anywhere near making contact. A trail of black smoke followed and the pitch registered on the machine at a smoldering 115 miles per hour.

Silver recoiled, nearly toppling over from the sheer strength of the pitch. There was rancorous cheer from Bowser's team.

"_Striiiiike one_!" The Ump crowed.

Silver lifted his facemask to gape at his smoking glove disbelievingly.

"You can't hit anything that fast!"

"That had some fire! Literally!"

"Serve up that firah King B!" Wolfe crowed.

"_Sheyt_," I cursed to myself.

"Just concentrate on the pitch," Ryu spoke, "You can do it."

"Two more strikes like that King Dad!" Morton cheered.

"Serve up dat heat King Dad!" Roy laughed.

Bowser's loud chortles were obnoxious, "And that was my change-up. Blow a kiss my way and I'll throw slower."

I growled, got back into my batting stance and glared. Bowser was laughing, grinning hellishly as he threw the next pitch. The ball blazed red, exploding through the air like a missile. I heard the blazing ball _sizzle_ as it whizzed past. A wash of heat passed by as I swung, barely missing as the ball nestled into Silver's glove.

The pitch registered at a terrifying '125 mph' and there was a loud 'Ooooh!' from the onlookers.

"Striiiiike two!" the Ump pointed.

"Argh!" I roared, smacking the bat against the homeplate, "Damn it!"

"Last strike! Take us home King Bowser!"

"Come on Mama Daisy!" Junior cheered, "Whack that ball! You can do it!"

"Strike her out-a!" Luigi shouted from first base.

"You're a tomboy!" Wendy snapped , "_Whack that ball like a savage_!"

"Hey baaaaaaatter~" Wolfe sing-sang.

The cheers rose into two waves. The first was from Bowser's team. A loud crow of, "_Strike her out! Strike her out!"_

The second cheer was, "Rip the ball princess! Rip the ball! Rip the ball!"

Bowser's grin was feral, red eyes blazing like fire; the rush of adrenaline and the high of competition was a heady addiction. We met eyes and he had the nerve to wink. Stars I want to run up there and _kick his ass_! I want to start a hockey-style fight. You know, the one where you pull the person's jersey over their head and then wail away at 'em?

Only he didn't wear a jersey and he had a three foot, four hundred pound advantage.

"Come on Flower," Bowser cooed, laughing, "I don't wanna strike you out. Just bring that cute lil' thing up here and plant a wet one on my cheek."

_Oh. I was so gonna that hit ball._

Bowser sighed, as if deeply troubled by my dismissal. Then he straightened up, eyes blazing. He licked his claws and fingered the smoking ball, grinning darkly.

He blew a large flame, setting the ball afire for what was sure to be one helluva fast ball. I gripped the bat tighter and dug my feet into the sand. Bowser released a blood thirsty roar as he reeled back and threw the flaming pitch.

It was speeding by so fast I could barely see it; a scorching, smoking blur was hurling forward. One second it left Bowser's claws and in the next blink it was in front of homeplate.

I swung as hard as I could, teeth grinding together. I swung, hips and arms moving in a symphony of precision and strength. The ball and bat met in satisfying kiss, kinetic energy exploding as the ball shot off like a rocket.

The recoil of a fast pitch made me stumble back. I smiled, watching my hit take off. And it flew...

And then...

Morton gaped, "King Dad! Look out!"

"Yo! King B!" Wolfe sounded panicked.

"Uh oh..." Silver whispered.

And before he could react, the ball hit a rather stunned-looking Bowwy right in the face.

* * *

><p>"Stars I'm <em>so sorry<em>. Oh! I already apologized twenty times but you're still not listening."

We were in Bowser's guestroom suite, nursing his new shiner. Glaring at everything but me, he held an icepack to his left eye as he sat on the bed. He was being stubborn, not talking or even looking my way. I sighed, placing my hands on my hips, "I didn't mean to hit you...But again, I'm sorry Bowser."

He glared, heated gaze focused over my shoulder, "..."

I moved in front of him, only to have him turn the other way, "Bowser I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! Honestly!"

"..."

"Ugh you're so stubborn! You know that?!"

"..."

There had to be a way to get him to talk. He loved the sound of his voice so even ignoring me had to be difficult for him. Come on and think; what would get Bowser to react? Well, he spazzes out when I mention my suitors. Let's try that then.

"Well," I fake sighed, "If you won't talk to me...I guess I'll go see Lulu. Later."

Just as I turned to walk away, Bowser reached forward and grabbed my arm. I smirked.

_Haha booya._

"You're not going anywhere near those losers," he growled, eyes dark.

I raised an eyebrow, "Ah. Finally deciding to talk now hmm?"

"You hit me with the ball! A flaming, _painful_ fastball!"

I threw my hands into the air, "I _explained_ this already! I swung and you...happened to have gotten hit by it!"

"Look at this!" He pulled the icepack away to reveal a rather nasty black eye.

"I said sorry!" I sighed, "I really didn't mean to."

"You could have just gave me a kiss and this wouldn't have happened," he grumbled.

My cheeks glowed pink as I stomped towards him. With each word I spoke, I poked his plastron with my index finger, "Oh yeah?! W-What would have everyone thought if I did that?! If I actually kissed you on your demand?!"

Eyes narrowed, he leaned in until we were inches apart, "What does everyone else's opinions matter? Do it 'cause I asked."

"Oh is _that _how things work!? I'm supposed to k-kiss you anytime you want me to?!"

A fierce grin surfaced on his face, "Why not? Sounds like a great idea if you ask me."

I glared, cheeks hot, "I can't believe you! You're sometimes so-"

"Undeniably masculine?" He smirked, "Sexy perhaps?"

His off-colored comment only served to vex me further. So much so I had a misstep and tripped over his huge foot. He was smiling evilly and I'm_ sure_ he stuck out his foot to trip me.

Mission accomplished Koopa jerk!

I fell, toppling over and spilling right into Bowser's lap. My head bounced off of his hard plastron like a basketball. Before I fell onto my rear, I grabbed onto his scaly leg.

My head throbbed like a fiend as I blinked back tears of pain, "Ugh, _sheyt_. Feels like I ran into a brick wall..."

The world spun for a dizzying moment before vision cleared . My throat dried the moment I realized where I was. Scandalously positioned in between his legs, with a hand precariously close on his upper thigh.

_I was millimeters away from touching...touching..._

"Ah...?"

_Oh. My. Stars..._

His expression was nothing but surprise as he gaped down at me. Mortification flooded into my being as I jolted. I screamed in a pitchy falsetto and as i jumped back, my nails briefly raked against his skin. Bowser groaned and I leapt away as if contact burned my obtrusive fingers.

"H-H-Holy crap," my face was blazing with so much heat I thought I'd pass out, "_I-I-I'm...I'm s-so sorry_! I'm such an idiot..."

"...D-Don't w-worry about it F-Flower," he was grimacing, voice terribly strained. His eyes were borderline purple in color as he spoke through his teeth.

"I'm sorry," by now my words were running into each other, in a jumble of incoherent clumps, "I...I...I'll make this better."

"Wait, don't come any closer-"

Does lightning strike twice? Maybe but the truth is, the klutzy tomboy does. I tripped for a second time and slipped, crashing right onto him. My torso was completely molded against his and again, I fell directly in his lap. Bowser released a deep, guttural growl. We looked up at each other and surprisingly he blushed a deep red. He even slapped a hand over his mouth.

I pulled back, "F-F-Fricking A. I'm so s-sorry. I didn't mean..."

"It's okay babydoll..." His voice was deeper, and he was speaking slowly, "H-How...About you...check on the kids for me?"

I wasn't dumb enough to avoid the obvious out he was providing me with. This was weird and awkward for both of us and I probably angered him. The only thing I could do clear-headed was nod, "O-Okay..."

Still glowing ruby-red, I got off of him and rushed out of the room, stumbling over my feet several times in the process. I closed the door and rushed out of there, heart hammering and nerves through the ceiling.

I stood, leaning against the door as my heart pounded against my chest crazily. I slapped a palm against my forehead and groaned.

'_Smooth move dumbass! First you bean him and then finish up by molesting him!'_

* * *

><p>The Stars must have a freakin' cruel sense of humor. And he knew this for several reasons.<p>

One: Daisy was beautiful, funny, spunky and strong.

Two: Daisy had no friggin' clue he was madly and utterly in love with her.

Three: It seemed like every friggin' man in the universe was after his Flower.

Four: As the studly king of Darklands, he never had to try to win a woman. _Ever._

Five: The only girl he ever loved was the hardest challenge in his life.

Six: Apparently Daisy had some kind of power that brought him to his knees.

Seven: Or the power to turn him on with the slightest touch.

_What the hell, Stars?!_

One woman can innocently graze his thigh and then _boom_, he's turned on?! This made no sense; he had slept with so many desirous, aggressive Koopettes. His sexual history would probably make the most hardened sailor blush but then here comes _little Miss Naïve_ and with one soft caress she nearly sends him into a blaze of carnal rapture.

She turned in on and not in the 'oh that was hot' kind of way but more like the 'I want to throw you to the floor and get it on' kind. He _moaned_ for Stars sake! When was the last time that happened?!

Like never, that's when.

Okay, okay it had happened _once_. The very first time he ever had sex. But that doesn't count, everyone's first time is awkward and totally unsexy. Yes, even _he_, the Koopette-killing Koopa king once had awkward sex.

Though he would never admit this truth to everyone. _Ever._

_What about Flower? She hasn't had a go at it yet. Bet I could blow her mind and get that pretty little blush of hers to spread all over...Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop it! No more of those thoughts..._

Her tiny fingers had been so _soft_ and _warm_. Her skin felt like silk, as soft and fragrant as the petals of a flower. Even her accidental, innocent touch sent a hot, smoldering _flood _of desire racing through his veins and sending his emotions spiraling out of control.

Not even Clawdia with all her effortless sensual experience and feminine wile sparked such a bellicose, coruscating aphrodisia in him. Just one ill-placed touch from Flower had him doubling over in knee-buckling decalescent pleasure.

Was he even _panting!? _He was flushed, temperature blazing as if he was being broiled alive within his own shell. The king rose to his feet, legs weak. In a strained, cracking voice he barely whispered, "I...think I need a cold, _cold_ shower..."

* * *

><p>"<em>Are those your sole symptoms, my prince?<em>"

"Yes Lady Kamelia," Ludwig sighed, massaging the bridge of his nose, "I would prefer if no one knew of our conversation."

"_Of course my liege._"

Ludwig looked up, realizing Kammy hadn't moved from her spot, "...Kamelia?"

"_I'm quite positive I won't need an encyclopedia to know what's happening to you my prince,_" Kammy smiled a bit, "_You're going to be absolutely fine._"

A weight lifted from his shoulders, "Thank the Stars...So then what is causing me to feel this way? Like I've been lit afire?"

Kammy chuckled, "_It's a perfectly normal process sire. You've finally come of age._"

Ludwig frowned, "Come of age for what?"

"_Why sire, you're going into heat._"

* * *

><p>Alice: Hahaha! Bet you guys didn't see the shot to the face coming! X)<p>

Ultrra: Yeah, but Bowser still wins.

Alice: Really!? Even after taking a fireball to the face!? A fireball Ultrra!

Ultrra: (strokes chin) Yes. Because Daisy may have beaned him-hilariously-but he still got a cute girl in his lap.

Alice: O_O Wow I didn't think of that!

Ultrra: Yep! The King wiiiiins! Homerun! XD

Alice: Lol! Why don't you guys, girls and emus all leave a review! ;)

Ultrra: Emus read the story too!? O_O


	21. Kingdom Tour: Moonstone

Alice: So you're probably thinking: 'What? She updated Thanksgiving weekend!?'

Ultrra: Oh yes she DID!

Alice: LOL! :3 We should all be thankful for food, family, friends, a roof over our head...

Ultrra: The Wii U coming out.

Alice: I was listing off the things that MATTER!

Ultrra: Are you kidding me!? What's more important than playing some Mario on the Wii U!?

Alice: (Face palm) My wifi's tweak-a-licious but I did buy a kindle fire so I've been-!"

Ultrra: Doing nothing but playing angry birds.

Alice: I've done MORE than THAT! XD

Ultrra: Yeah. Suuuuure. But remember Christmas is coming up and Santa KNOWS the truth.

Alice: I want to let everyone know that I'm _always_ writing! :3 One day I'm working on a chapter that's waaay in the future and other days I'm working on the ending. There's no method to my writing madness XD

Ultrra: But you NEED to work on the current chapter.

Alice: I can't explain why but this chapter was really hard to write. I wrote it ten times, burned it, then wrote it again. XD

Ultrra: 'Burned it!?' Well no wonder why your computer doesn't work!

Alice: Yeah I guess. Hmm, do you think I'm Marysueing the protag?

Ultrra: (Confused) The what?

Alice: Protag. Short for protagonist? XD I was trying to make a hip, cool way to say it—?"

Ultrra: Protag sounds like a drug. Don't EVER use that again. Not all abbreviations are cool. XD Hmm. The claims are well-founded: she's a well-loved, admired character by most of the male characters she comes into contact with.

Alice: So then...?

Ultrra: However, in _MarySueology_ 10/10 times there's no profound reason why every-single-guy is madly in love with the _Suester_. Daisy, despite being well-admired has a good foundation as to why she's well liked: 1) she's a public figure and thousands of people crush on people just 'cause they're famous 2) she's a princess AND rich. 3) Daisy of the N64 era was pretty friggin' hot. 4) She is unique and has a great personality. 5) A key ruler breaker to _Marysueolog_y: while lots of guys do like her, I can easily list Mario, Kamek, Toad, Parry, Morton, Yoshi as having no interest in her. Also I think some of her suitors don't like her either but that's just a hunch. XD 6) She's a woman who can SMASH a 125 mph, flaming fastball. Hell I'd try to marry her too! XD

Alice: So that's what it takes to win you over, eh Ultrra? The moment a girl hits a flaming fastball...?

Ultrra: Boom. She's marriage material. X)

Alice: To all my reading/reviewing ladies out there, you now officially know how to capture Ultrra's heart! Lol! XD Oh! I'm 93% done with the next chapter...Heh if you guys slip a good number of reviews fast enough...I just might Up + Date...?

Ultrra: (gasps) Alice! Are you blackmailing the reviewers!?

Alice: Well...Not really...Aww man now I feel guilty! I was kidding! I would have update fast anyways—! XD

Ultrra: I am PROUD of you! It may have taken awhile but I knew there was hope for you yet!

Alice: XD Readers, reviewers, favoriters please enjoy this chapter. I better end this before Ultrra tries to 'corrupt' me even further. X)

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>Prince Taurus stood in a silent hallway studying Sarasalandian tapestries and pieces of art with a detached, lethargic interest. The clanking of approaching heels alerted him to a new presence. The golden-haired prince removed himself from the wall and stood at attention. His dark cloak rippled at his feet like liquid.<p>

"Queen Meringue?" The moonlight bled through the windows, spilling across his features in a white glow, "It's a bit late to be walking around but I presume you called me here."

"I had something of the utmost importance I wished to speak of with you," the queen spoke coolly.

A silver suitcase was flung, landing at the Aqualandian prince's expensive loafers.

The prince remained unmoved; he wasn't going to kneel; servants bowed, "What's in it?"

"Take a look for yourself, prince."

He smirked, "Very well then. Just to appease you milady."

He peered at the case and took a knee. It was made of the hardest Koopa alloy; that meant inside was...

"That's half," Meringue spoke, blue eyes cold and glittering like ice, "inside you'll find one hundred thousand coins. You'll have the rest securely delivered to your kingdom if you leave within forty-eight hours."

"What...is this even for?" Taurus popped open the case. Inside was a glimmering, golden span of coins.

"This is a compensation for your travel expenses and a little extra on the side. This can all be yours...If you swiftly depart from Sarasaland and terminate any type of communication with my granddaughter."

"Ah, so the truth comes out," Taurus rose to his feet, grinning, "You do not wish me to wed your granddaughter."

"Quite frankly I'd prefer if you didn't breathe the same air."

Taurus laughed, a soft sound echoing through the halls, "Two hundred thousand? For backing off?"

"I'm going to be completely blunt," Meringue stepped closer until she was inches away. The shadows brought her menacing glare to life, "I think you and your family are the lowest trash. I will be damned before I let my granddaughter marry a _seloh _like you."

Taurus chuckled quietly, "Oh _queen._ This entire thing is quite darling: a secretive meeting, offering a generous fund. While you are in the mood of being completely honest then so shall I."

He grinned, silver eyes flashing, "While the Sarasaland court may pretend you are an empress, you are nothing more than a figurehead, a mascot even. You hold no true power otherwise we wouldn't have this meeting in a secluded hallway. It is the will of the council and they wish for me to wed their princess."

Meringue narrowed her eyes as he continued, "You get to wear a sparkly little crown and play dress-up all day, pretending to be a real queen but when it comes down to it, it is your son and council who have the true power. Even so, two hundred thousand coins is an _insulting_ amount. I would pay three just to see your granddaughter wed a pig."

"Mark my words Taurus," Meringue whispered dangerously, "if you do not leave now, you will regret it."

He smirked, "I only regret wasting my time with a washed-up old bat who believes herself an empress."

He laughed, about to place an amicable arm on her shoulder. Grammy slapped his hand before he could touch the silk of her dress, "Please refrain prince. I absolutely abhor getting dirt on my clothing. It's improper for an empress to let filth touch her body."

Taurus laughed, absolutely delighted, "Anything else you'd like to ask of me?"

"I'd say to choke on your own tongue but even then that's too good."

The prince smirked, "I shall take my leave, empress. Have a good night."

With that Taurus left, whistling an upbeat tune to himself.

Meringue snorted, "What a _fyuker_."

"Is everything alright? I heard noise over here."

Sakuro appeared holding a candle and under the flooding ribbons of moonlight his pale complexion glowed ethereally. Concern was etched into his features as he studied his mother's stern countenance.

"Everything's fine dear, I wanted to take a walk."

Sakuro nodded, eyes narrowed as he studied her, "You're not in any pain are you?"

She barked a short laugh, "Oh no. I'm just thinking..."

He placed his hands on her shoulder, peering closely, "Mother you are being completely honest with me?"

She studied his features, the cool pale blue eyes were from his father but the long dark hair and angular features were her lineage. _We've certainly made some pretty children, my love. _She smiled, lightly touching his cheek, "Yes, I'm fine darling. I better go. Daisy and I have quite the long day ahead."

She pressed a kiss against her son's cheek before walking away. As the emperor turned on his heel to leave, his foot smashed against something hard. At his ankle was a Koopa-alloy carrying case. He picked it up and began to study it.

"..."

* * *

><p>Early the following morning Kammy and Kamek arrived with one of the king's glorious airships. The Koopalings had been retrieved much to Bowser's relief and were set to depart. Each of the children hugged Daisy and bid their farewells. Junior even rushed forward to hug Emperor Sakuro, who broke into laughter, "Bye Grandpa! See you later! Let's play Sarasaland checkers again!"<p>

Bowser's eye twitched; it was barely dawn and already Junior had broken two hundred and twenty-five royal protocols with a single hug. Sakuro was probably more than aware of this. He returned the hug, "Have a safe travel Bowser Junior. I look forward to our next meeting."

The twins had hugged Daisy, fake-crying obnoxiously.

"We're gonna miss you Mamacita!"

"You make it sound like I won't see you in a year! I'll be in the Darklands in four days!" Daisy had laughed, "now pull it in for a hug."

The twins crushed her into a hug. Larry whispered to his twin as they shot a sly grin their Father's way. The king arched an eyebrow, immediately suspicious. The twins purred loudly, hugging Daisy and even nuzzling affectionately, "Oh Mamacita! Your skin is _sooooo_ soft! And your hugs are _soooooo_ warm!"

Larry even began to peck kisses on her cheek as she laughed. Lemmy sighed happily, resting his head on her shoulder, "It's like heaven."

"Oh mommy! I _looooooove _kissing you!" Larry purred, shooting a mischievous grin at Bowser," I'm glad _I _can kiss Mama Daisy!"

Bowser was livid, shaking with visible rage as the back of his maw glowed red.

"I love you Mama Daisy," Lemmy sighed, shooting an arch grin at his dad.

"Okay you two," she laughed, "Be good, if that's even possible."

The second they stepped away from her, Bowser was on them like stink on Wario. The twins ran away screaming girlishly as Bowser pursued furiously, blasting fireballs and snarling.

"Come back here! I'll _show_ you 'soft skin'!"

"Your clearly violent actions say otherwise!"

With the airship's departure the sky glowed with the glory of the rising sun, curtains of vibrant gold and orange splashed in the dawning stratosphere. Wendy and Iggy stood on the wooden deck, soaking in the glowing horizon and sparkling garnet-red sunrise.

Morton and Ludwig were across the deck playing a game of Koopa checkers. Iggy peered down at the golden desert below, "It was nice to see Mama Daisy," Iggy smiled, "Even if we did break her statue. I really like her. She's so nice."

"Ooh! Did you see the way King Daddy stared at her!?" Wendy sighed with a girlish exuberance, "It's like she was the only thing in the world! So romantic!"

Iggy expression softened, "He really likes her."

"Then it is decided!" Larry slapped an arm on Iggy's shoulder as his voice boomed, "We will bring them together and make her our mom!"

"Heh I almost feel bad we're sticking her with our dad. Who'd wanna marry _that_?" Lemmy chuckled.

"Twiddle stupid and Twiddle dumbass don't get involved," Wendy growled, "Like I have everything under control!"

"The only thing you have under control," Larry laughed, "is a jacked-up fashion sense."

Wendy's face glowed red as her left eye twitched, "What...did you just say to me?!"

"I'm kidding Wendy!" He grinned, "But I'm down to get them together."

Junior popped up, tail wagging, "Count me in! Me too! I want King Dad to marry Mama Daisy and then...And then we can be a family! A real family!"

"I don't see why youse guys are so damn crazy ova dat broad."

Roy appeared. Subtly was never his strong suit as his amethyst shell gleamed from a custom polish job and he approached with an arrogant saunter. Junior frowned, craning his head to glare at his brother, "Don't say that about Mama Daisy! She's nice and smart and—"

As he walked towards his siblings, Roy shoved Junior aside, sending the tiny Koopaling careening.

"_H-Hey!"_ Junior squeaked.

"Don't shove him so hard," Wendy growled.

"That's right," Larry huffed, "brutalizing the little guy is my job."

"Leave Junior alone," Iggy frowned.

"Tha little worm needs ta toughen up. King Pops spoils him. All he does is cry like a sissy."

Junior raced around, hiding behind Lemmy for protection. He peered around his brother's leg and frowned at Roy.

"Ya been singin' her praises like she's Marylin MonKoopa or somethin'. I ain't seen nothin' special 'bout her. Why does ev'ryone like dat chick?"

"Well I dunno," Wendy snapped, "Maybe its because she's fun, witty, cute and like King Daddy is madly in love with her!"

"It's obvious he has deep feelings for Mama Daisy," Iggy spoke, softly, "I like her."

Roy laughed darkly, "What? He ain't in love wit her! She's a human. What kinda Koopa would want her ova a koopette? He's playin' around wit her."

"You're such an idiot sometimes," Wendy snarled.

"And you're a futura jumpoff."

"You have like issues upon _issues_!" Wendy snapped, "I am a _lady_!"

"Ease up on Wens dude," Lemmy spoke.

The clash of two powerful personalities guaranteed a fight and everyone knew that while Wendy's temper was dangerous, Roy's was worse. Iggy intervened, "Why don't you like her?" Iggy asked.

Larry and Lemmy peered at each other before smirking at their older brother.

"Should I take this one? Or would you like to take a gander?"

"Please, take a gander Mr. Ganderer."

"Roy," Larry spoke in a serious courthouse voice, "I would like to recall evidence that yesterday, at eleven thirty six am you all but flagrantly hit on the Momster."

"Momster?"

"Otherwise known as Mamacita, Mama Daisy, the Yellow flash, Flower power..." Larry peered at his twin, "any other nicknames I forgot?"

"Yellow snow."

"Right Yellow sn—hey! That is _not_ one of her nicknames!"

Lemmy snickered.

"Point being. You're just sore she rejected your ass!" Larry boomed with laughter.

Roy smirked, "Ya tellin' me you ain't even a little curious?"

"About what?" Iggy asked.

"I'm talkin' ta tha twins, this is real Koopa talk Iggz, go bake a cake or somethin' like a housewife," Roy laughed.

Iggy blushed at the insult. Roy looked between the twins, smirking, "Koopa ta Koopa ya neva wondered what it's like to bang a human girl?" He laughed, "I saw an opportunity and took it. Nothin' more nothin' less."

A blanket of silence fell over the Koopalings. Junior tugged on Wendy's shell and quietly asked the meaning behind Roy's rather crude speech.

"Don't worry about it," she replied, glaring holes into Roy.

Roy was surprised at the hostility he received. Even the twins who he thought would laugh off his statement were glaring, growling. Wendy shooed Junior off, sending him towards Ludwig and Morton. Once the innocent set of ears left, Wendy lit into him viciously,"You're such an ass! Like don't say that about her! I like her!"

"I don't care if you like her or not. Tha truth's tha truth. King Pops only got one reason he's keepin' dat girl around," Roy sneered, "You are mental if you tink otherwise. An' once he gets what he wants, he's gonna kick her ta tha curb."

"Jump off a friggin' cliff! I like understand an idiot like you can only like a girl if you're sleeping with her," Wendy snapped, "But that's not the case with King Daddy. He is truly in love with her and would do anything to make her happy. Since you're nothing but a stupid _lizard_ you wouldn't understand anyways."

The twins and Iggy froze, surprised at such a harsh epithet. Roy was stunned before his anger ignited. Red clouded his vision as he trembled. He snarled gutturally, grabbing her pink bow and yanking her head viciously. Wendy shrieked, windmilling her arms against his plastron as she screamed.

Roy growled, snapping her around like a doll, "So I'm a _lizard_ am I? Den you're nothin' but a stupid little whore."

Iggy grew pale, aghast as the twins rushed in, attempting to pull Roy off their sister. Compared to him she was so tiny. But the twins alone weren't strong enough to pull their hulking, muscular brother away.

Morton and Ludwig saw the commotion and raced across the deck. As Ludwig rushed forward, anger burned his eyes and made fire roil in the base of his throat. In one fluid motion, he pried Roy away and with a vicious punch flung him across the deck.

The aircrew began to appear, the skirmish attracting growing curiosity. Roy groaned, rubbing his smarting head. He glared, nostrils smoking as he leered at Ludwig. The eldest prince held a ruthless sneer on his face, sharp fangs bared.

"The hell were you thinking," Ludwig snarled, "putting your claws on her?!"

"She called me a _lizard_!" Roy roared, "And even den, I don't have to explain shit to you _Luddy_."

Ludwig narrowed his eyes, baring his incisors. The growl in his voice made his words beastly, "Do it again and I'll rip you apart."

Roy rose to his feet, glaring. He swiped a thumb across his lip and saw blood. _That nerdy lil' bastard actually drew blood._ _This isn't over._ With a snort, he turned and stomped off. Once the threat was banished, Ludwig rose from the defensive crouch and turned to face his siblings.

They all stared.

Even Wendy who's makeup was smeared, mascara running down her cheeks, gaped at him. The red haze lifted from his vision like fog and Ludwig was stunned. He flung Roy across the deck of the airship. He was fairly strong, but never imbued with titan strength like that. Feats of strength and might were Roy's forte. And yet he had manhandled him.

_Stars, is...is it the heat?_

"Damn..." Lemmy whispered with awe, "remind me to never get on your bad side."

Ludwig went over to Wendy, expression closed, "Are...You okay Wendy?"

She blinked, "Yes. T-Thanks Luddy."

"No problem..."

She realized her bow was lopsided and quickly fixed it straight.

"Why were you fighting?" Morton frowned, "Fighting is a terrible, terrible thing little siblings."

Everyone froze; an angry Ludwig was scary but Morton's fury was like the apocalypse. He may have been slow to anger and impossible to upset but when he was mad, it was an otherworldly experience.

"He s-said s-some really bad things about Mama Daisy," Iggy whispered.

Again Ludwig felt the stir of feral anger. He had to leave before his patience snapped. So while his siblings talked things over, he marched away, growling. He knew he was being completely irrational but the dormant, beastly Koopa urges he usually ignored was alluring.

"What the hell was Roy-boy thinking?" Larry asked, "Dude spazzed out and went Koopanator on Wendy."

"H-He is like, such a jerk," Wendy sniffled, wiping at her eyes, dark smudges of eyeliner smearing, "I hate him so much."

Morton purred comfortingly and pulled Wendy against his plastron in a hug, "Calm down little sister. It upsets me to see your pain. I will hold you until you feel better, okay?"

Wendy laughed, "O-Okay. Thanks Morty."

"Your eyes look like Mario's tanooki outfit," Iggy said.

They all fell silent and Larry looked up, "Did...Did you just clown on her Iggz?!"

Lemmy laughed, "Iggy clowned you Wendy!"

They laughed and Junior who had been quiet the whole time suddenly ran off screaming, "I dunno what just happened...but I'm still gonna tell King Dad on all of you!"

Again they all looked at each other before bursting out into laughter. Morton looked where Roy had disappeared seconds ago; _I am concerned about you older brother...A brother should not treat his precious little siblings so._

* * *

><p>"Is everything packed and ready?" Lady Angora inquired.<p>

"Yes milady."

"Splendid."

Under Lady Angora's hand, I wore an extra expensive white chiffon gown and a constricting corset. I was made-up like a doll, hair ironed until it fell around my shoulders like a thick auburn curtain.

Even as the limousine unloaded my luggage, Angora followed all the way to the jet, reciting manner after manner, "Remember: it is proper for a lady to curtsy after every compliment."

"Uh huh..."

"Sip teas without slurping or making any dreadful noise."

"Uh huh."

"Never eat to your fill, it is dastardly to feed like a hog."

"Yep."

"And you failed to listen to a single word I said, didn't you?" She sighed, shaking her head.

"I heard you," I grinned, "I just want to be on time and catch our flight."

Angora nodded her head curtly, "Very well then. Have a pleasant trip your ladyship. I put an extra bottle of hair-smoothing serum just in case. Stars knows you're _going _to need it."

I turned to Grammy, "Ready to fly empress?"

She appeared far away in thought. I laughed, elbowing her side softly. She jumped, "Huh? Did I miss something?"

"We're ready to depart. The boys are packed and stowed away, it's just us now."

Grammy smiled, "Then let's not keep them waiting.

She wrapped an arm around mine as we traveled up the stairs and into the private jet. I was extra cautious, traveling at a slow pace for Grammy. We took our seating, greeted by the friendly flight crew. The private jet had been a gracious gift from our family in the Mushroom kingdom. Wolfe was excited and kept pressing random buttons to see what they'd do as Bowser sat with his arms crossed, glaring dead ahead.

We passed time by watching movies and the selected film was a known 'chick flick'. Unsurprisingly the guys protested, not wanting to watch any movie that was sappy or completely over emotional. But really, if you squinted and tilted your head to the left, then and _only_ then could one see it was a chick flick.

I mean look at the protagonist; enter Flora, a young, independent woman with an attitude and guts. She was trying to become a pro skateboarder and rode the bumps and survived the falls that came along with the profession.

Then enter complications—heh, men—love interest numero uno, was a tall handsome guy named Reese. He was kind, funny, sweet, the 'perfect' guy. Then there was the second love interest she meets at a party; Brett was Reese's polar opposite.

He was dark, rough, wild, and rude. He was tatted up and built like a Greek statue. And when he smiled there was something feral about it. A few hours into the film and the guys were captivated, enraptured in the story. They laughed at the jokes and made bets on who would 'get the girl.'

'Chick flicks' suck huh?

The boys all cheered at a fight between the two male protagonists. Brett was beating the holy Stars out of Reese and the guys loved it. Brett threw the nice pretty boy onto a table, knocking over glasses and running off patrons. Just when the fighting looked to be over, Brett threw a brutal fist into Reese's face as the two men rolled around the floor.

"Kick his ass!" Wolfe shouted to his screen.

"He's choking that guy out all wrong," Bowser spoke to Luigi in a 'sage' voice, "you want to really get a good grip around the person's neck, extend the arms and then _squeeze_."

Luigi shot a skeptical look at him, "How-a would you know the right-a way to choke someone?!"

Bowser shrugged, "Nothing was better practice than choking Mario. I did it at least once a week. I really hate that guy. Hell, I'd choke him right now if I could."

Luigi gaped incredulously, "_Wow._.."

"Could you teach me how to choke someone?!" Wolfe asked excitedly, his head appearing from behind his seat.

"Is that a proper thing you'd really like to learn?" Ryu arched an eyebrow, "I don't think it's appropri—"

"Sure," Bowser grinned, "It's all about technique! Even a beginner can have a half-decent grip! Let's start you peons with the basics: first you got to—"

Silver stuck his head out, "There's about to be a love confession!"

"Shhh!" Wolfe hissed, "They're talking!"

"Shut up _Luigi_ they're talkin!" Bowser growled, even though Luigi wasn't talking.

The conversation died immediately and all the guy pulled back to watch their personal televisions. I laughed; they really liked this movie! What about all of that 'chick flicks suck' nonsense!?

Uh huh, just as I thought.

"_Sometimes you're such a dumbass,_" Brett growled, looming over Flora, "_You're such an airhead_."

They stood in the rain, water drowning their features and soaking their clothes. Brett's strong physique was revealed, soaked shirt hugging his powerful torso. Luigi offered to share a bowl of popcorn with Bowser. Big mistake, the king took it, threw back his head and drained the entire thing. He slapped the empty bowl to Luigi's chest. Lulu blinked dumbly at the empty bowl.

"_I'm an airhead?!_" Flora snapped, leaning on her toes to shout in his face, "_What don't I understand Brett?_!"

He leaned in, eyes flashing as he whispered roughly, "_All the things I've done for you, I ain't doin' it 'cause I'm nice. I...like you Flo_."

She was stunned, "_What_?"

"_I like you Flo_," his eyes were hooded as he leaned in.

It was obvious they were about to kiss and someone in the plane squealed; I don't know who, but one of the guys _squealed_ with glee.

"Kiss..." Wolfe began to chant, "Kiss...Kiss! Kiss!"

Luigi joined in, "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!"

"_W-What are you...?_" She fumbled with her words.

Brett growled before he darted forward, grabbing her face and pulling her into a hard kiss. The boys left out a deafening roar of celebration, with Wolfe hi-fiving everyone and Luigi happy-dancing in his seat. Silver sniffled.

"Now _that's_ what I call a _movie_!" Wolfe beamed, "There were fight scenes and ass-kickings! _Yeah_!"

Luigi sighed wistfully, "I-a liked the kiss in the rain-a..."

"I-It was really romantic," Silver smiled.

I laughed; they sounded like girls!

"What did you think King Bowser?" Grammy grinned.

"It didn't suck like I thought," Bowser hummed to himself, rubbing his jawline.

Zero shook his head, "Glad you all enjoyed it."

"The plot-line was unpredictable and filled with humor," Ryu nodded his head.

Wolfe grinned, slapping Ryu across the back. I laughed at the blank stare Ryu gave in return; something tells me that was the equivalent of a glare from him. "Sounds like Mr. Shinobi approves!"

I shook my head; they enjoyed the chick flick more than I did when I first watched it!

"So," Bowser purred, "That means there's hope for guys like Brett eh?"

Grammy smiled, "Hmm? You mean badboys with a chiseled physique? I think there's _lots _of hope."

She leaned over and whispered something in the king's ears. I don't know what she said but Bowser snapped his head in my direction. Surprisingly he blushed as Grammy laughed. Yep. I don't even _want _to know what she said.

Four hours into the flight found most of the boys asleep, with Bowser and Wolfe's snores flooding the cabin. The sun was starting to rise as the last golds, browns and tan scenery of the desert transitioned into the pristine white of snow.

Grammy slept, head rested on my shoulder as I studied the land below. I was too nervous to sleep. This was the beginning of finding my husband. _Please Stars, let me find the right guy. Someone patient, caring, funny, someone who'll love me...for me._

"_Ladies and gentlemen_," the speakers disrupted one of Bowser's rattling snores, "_We are beginning our descent into the Moonstone kingdom. The local time is seven thirty am. We would all here like to thank you for flying the royal airways and remember, we are the only airlines to treat our customers like royalty."_

I could hear the boys speaking to each other, taking in the area of the kingdom below. I gently rubbed Grammy's shoulder, "Grammy? It's time to wake up, we're almost there."

"Hmm?" Blue eyes fluttered open, "Time already? Oh look at all that snow. It sparkles so pretty in the light."

Not more than fifteen minutes did we land, taxing down the airstrip. The buildings were beautiful, sparkling like an oversized quartz crystal. The citizens lived in large igloos and traveled in snowplowers and snowmobiles.

As the plane unloaded, I took a second to look around. Silver was the prince of a land with four seasons of ice, hail and sleet. The sun glowed over the gorgeous buildings, sparkling in the sunlight like a sea of diamonds. Small tufts of snow flurries blustered through the sky, floating lazily like the petals of a flower. Most of the guys were busy fighting over who had the 'honor' of carrying my luggage so as they bickered, I stuck my tongue out, trying to taste a snowflake.

"_Ahhhhhhhhhh~"_

"Well, that's very dignified."

Apparently Zero was one of my suitors who didn't feel compelled to help out with my luggage.

I stared at him, "Good thing I didn't ask you."

"I see you are your usual charming self, as pleasant as a box of ticks."

I smirked, " A bloodsucker like you must feel right at home huh?"

Zero laughed quietly as I walked to the limo; I've hated that guy since childhood, I wasn't going to suddenly forgive and forget. The valet opened the door and helped Grammy in but before I could slide in, someone took my hand.

I met the crimson eyes of king Bowser, "In we go milady."

Luigi looked shocked. I smiled up at him, "Thank you King Bowser."

I took my seat beside Grammy, whose eyes gleamed like jewels. When the others looked away I spoke in my 'non-princessly' voice, "Thanks Bowser."

"You're welcome Flower. But first..."

And with a crazy grin, he leaned forward and planted an extremely wet kiss on the back of my hand. And not only that but he had his lips glued to my hand for a full ten seconds before pulling away! Grammy broke into laughter as Bowser smirked. I glared, cheeks burning, "You're _such_ an idiot..."

Bowser smirk grew more dangerous as he threw his arms on either side of me, "Say that again princess and I'll climb in here, fog up the damn windows—"

"_B-Bowser!"_ I gasped, moving away.

He purred thickly, slowly slinking closer with a sinful grin and half-lidded eyes.

"_My, my, my_. You're going to do _what _now King Koopa?"

Grammy burst out laughing. Oh _sheyt_ she heard and saw all of that. Bowser actually looked sheepish. He moved away so fast he bumped his head against the door of the limo with a thunderous bang. Bowser cursed vehemently as Grammy exploded with laughter.

Well, soooo much for class.

"Argh!" Bowser massaged his pounding skull, "S-Sorry Queen. Didn't mean to try anything while you were in the car. Or uh...say the word that rhymes with duck..."

Grammy arched an eyebrow, smiling "Oh? So then you would 'try' something if I wasn't in the vehicle?"

I glared. Bowser froze, catching his mistake. Grammy laughed, "Just climb on in milord."

"Thank you Que—"

"And that's_ not_ an invite to 'try things' with my granddaughter by the way."

Again Grammy laughed as Bowser looked stunned. I groaned, covering my face. Luigi and Silver entered moments later. Wolfe sat on the adjacent seat, as excited as a puppy, "Wow! Never rode in a limo before. It's like I'm a movie star!"

"Can that animal ride in here?" Zero asked, pointing to Puppo.

Wolfe held Puppo to his chest, frowning, "He's not an 'animal' jerkhead. He's a Chow and his name is Puppo."

"Quite frankly I care little about you or that mongrel. Hopefully you've house broken the mutt."

Taurus laughed as Wolfe and Puppo growled. Grammy shot a stern look at Zero, "Let's play nice, eh boys? Sarasaland would appreciate diplomacy Lord Salini."

"My apologies my Queen."

Wolfe's spirit seemed unhampered as he turned to Weegee, "You been in a limo before?"

"Once-a for Princess Peach's twenty first-a birthday-a," Luigi touched the leather seating with awe.

Bowser sighed deeply, "_Peasants._ Just go against personal instinct and act like you've been somewhere before."

* * *

><p>"Window up!"<p>

Wolfe pressed the button.

"Window dooooown!"

The window rolled down.

"Window up!"

He rolled the window up.

"Window dooooown!"

Bowser looked like he wanted to punch out Wolfe as Grammy watched, amused. The whole ride Wolfe had been standing, head out the sunroof and howling with Puppo. The limousine drove us to the Crystal Palace, home of the Moonlandian monarchy. If my geography was accurate then Sherbet Land wasn't too far from here. I asked Silver.

"Oh! It's just over those hills," Silver pointed to a range of vanilla-coated hills. From here the snowy mountains looked like they were dipped in sugar.

The limo slowed,"Ladies and gentlemen welcome to the dazzling Crystal palace!"

"Here's home..." Silver beamed.

We peered out the windows as the palace came into sight. It was beautiful; the snow glowed magically and the glittering fortress shone like diamond. The valet opened the door as an icy breath of frosty air hit like a tangible blow.

"Whew that's some serious cold!" Grammy laughed, ducking her head to my shoulder, "Desert people weren't made for this kind of stuff!"

I shivered, never realizing when I fell into Bowser. His low chuckle reverberated as he helped steady my wavering balance.

"Easy does it," he grinned, "This place is nothing but ice and snow, if you fall it's not just going to be embarrassing, it's going to hurt too."

"Gee thanks for stating the obvious," I laughed.

The palace staff were cloaked in thick, fur coats. They rushed towards Silver, laughing and hugging their prince. They spoke in an airy, fluid language, rejoicing at their prince's return. Hmm when Silver spoke his native tongue he didn't stutter; wonder if it's a comfort barrier.

Silver walked over, "Queen Meringue, Princess Daisy, t-this is my mother, Queen Titania."

The queen was dressed in a beautiful sparkling white fur coat and donned with a glittering white crown fashioned to look like a snowflake. Her entire ensemble of jewelry—necklace, earrings—were silver, sparkling snowflakes. Like her son she had the same milk-white hair and large honest eyes.

She smiled, "_Greetis olu_. Welcome to the Moonstone Kingdom. I am pleased to meet the royal Sarasalandian ladies."

"_Ahula_." Grammy smiled, bowing, "It is our pleasure as well."

My nose tickled as the two exchanged the usual flowery pleasantries. I reeled back and sneezed, something very improper and unladylike. I blushed as the Moonstonian Queen smiled, "Perhaps we should go indoors where it's warmer?"

"Yes p-please," my teeth chattered.

Now that I think about it, it was freezing out here! It was snowing and I came from a hot, dry kingdom!

"M-M-Mama mia it's cold!"

Bowser laughed, "This is the kind of weather that puts hair on your chest! Greenstache you could stand to gain some."

"Huh?"

I looked at my suitors and something funny happened. Moments ago, they had been shivering and shaking but the second I looked their direction, they stood tall, pretending to be impervious to the cold.

Oooh! _How utterly manly and stalwart of them_. I am _sooo_ swooning. I laughed, they stood like super heroes; staring off into the distance with a hard look. I stepped beside Bowser and whispered, "It's okay, you don't have to pretend the cold isn't…well cold."

Bowser chuckled, "I'm actually not. Its snowy and cold but the moment I breathe fire I'm warm again. It's these other bozos who are tryin' to impress you. Quite a lame attempt if I say."

"M-M-M-Momma Mia!" Luigi whimpered, shivering, "It's-a cold out here!"

Bowser snorted, "Have some Star damn pride would you Greenstache!? Man the hell up."

"S-S-Says the guy who-a breathes fire!" Luigi hissed.

Wolfe grinned, "Yup, I'm freezing my ass off. Hey princess, wanna snuggle to stay warm?"

Snow crunched under his boots as he approached. Wolfe's mischievous grin grew as he loomed, "We can cuddle to stay warm...?"

"Oh _Stars_," Zero groaned.

I blushed, taken back by his eagerness, "Uh…?"

"Easy there, dogboy," Bowser took my arm and moved me behind his massive shell, "I don't think the princess wants to be slobbered on."

Surprisingly Wolfe looked offended, "_H-Hey!_ I haven't drooled on anyone since I was a pup!"

"_Wow_," Bowser sneered as I laughed, "What a group of _winners _you have at your disposal princess."

Wolfe suddenly grinned, "Don't make me pull a Brett on you! I really don't wanna kick your ass in front of the princess."

Bowser chortled, "Oh _please_ human, I will pull a Brett and choke_ you_ out."

Wow. They_ really_ liked that movie!

We entered the grand Crystal palace which was admittedly only a few degrees warmer than the outside. As we toured the palace, it was easy to appreciate the Crystal palace's splendor: the walls were pearly with an icy sheen and the floor itself was made of ice! Ice!

I was told the furniture was made of glass, to give the illusion of carved ice. The statues littered throughout the palace were indeed made of ice. The castle was naturally thirty two degrees Fahrenheit and any kind of ice or snow could exist without melting. The Moonstonians were a people used to bone-chilling weather and subzero temperature. To travel through the palace we had to put on ice skates; made sense seeing as the floor was made of ice.

"So how do you get upstairs then?" Wolfe asked.

"He asked an intelligent question for a change," Zero spoke.

Puppo growled, barking but Wolfe ignored him, "Ignore that guy, he's a succubus."

I laughed.

"W-We uh take elevators and the l-like," Silver replied.

As I looked around, servants and maids effortlessly soared on skates. They were doing the usual servants' workload but on skates! If the Moonstonians had to ice-skate to get around, then I understand why they dominated ice-skating events in the Olympics so easily.

Bowser stared, watching as we put on skates. Wolfe's balance was terrible as he slipped and fell everywhere. Zero wised up and held onto the handrails. Luigi was a good skater and Ryu was surprisingly graceful.

"You-a skated before?" Luigi asked, "I-a was in the Olympics and they-a called me 'the green gazelle' when I skated."

"As a child I used to but that was years ago," Ryu spoke, "But I remember a bit of the basics. Nothing that can top the 'green gazelle.'"

Bowser snorted, "More like the green _blowhard_."

"Where are your skates?" Zero asked Bowser.

"Hey. He has a point. Where _are_ my friggin' skates?!" Bowser growled, "Oh lemme guess, they don't have skates in Koopa sizes."

A servant skated over, "My apologies Lord Koopa but we do not have skates in Koopa sizes."

I laughed; he had called it verbatim! The Moonstonians apologized profusely as Bowser frowned, tail thrashing angrily. He grumbled under his breath, "Yeah? Then at dinner give me the Koopa's share of dessert or something."

"Of course milord."

We skated through the palace—well Wolfe was slipping and Bowser wobbled unsteadily—and I realized something. The Moonstonians were homogeneous, sharing Prince Silver's features: milk-white skin, ash blonde hair and pale, icy eyes.

If I walked among the Moonstonians, my bronze complexion and reddish-brown hair would stick out like a sore thumb. Silver led the tour, giving an overview of his kingdom. Moonstone was the leader of medicinal creation and technological advancement.

If you had a cold, flu, illness and bought medicine, chances are it was created and shipped from here. Moonstone was also the biggest exporter of gems and precious metals, a market that had been theirs since the kingdom's founding.

"W-We are p-proud that ninety percent of all jewel exportation occurs from our—"

_Thud!_

The chandeliers rattled and I felt a jump. What was that? Bowser was sprawled flat on his stomach and seeing stars. Without skates his balance was terrible. Prince Taurus and Zero poorly hid their mirth. Luigi's brows wrinkled in concern as Ryu remained blasé. Wolfe turned his head, holding back a laugh; Puppo barked suspiciously like laughter. Silver blinked before skating over. Grammy and I appeared beside Bowser.

Silver glided across the ice as if it were second nature, "King Koopa are you okay? T-That was a rather nasty fall."

"_Totally_ ate it," Wolfe whispered loudly, causing a few suitors to laugh.

"I'm_ fine_," Bowser snarled, nearly slipping again as he tried to regain his balance, "Just continue your stupid talk."

"I-If you insist," Silver gave one last look before continuing, "S-So along with diamonds, pearls and rubies we continue our export with rare topaz stones…"

I skated to Bowser. I was a decent skater due to Mario and Sonic winter Olympics training. I wasn't graceful or good at it but I was able to do the most important things in skating: going and stopping.

I took a knee, checking for wounds, "Hey, are you okay?"

His head snapped up and he did a double-take, realizing it was me. I smiled and when I offered a hand to him, Bowser's face glowed red and suddenly he was scrambling frantically, trying to get onto his feet. His claws scraped manically across the ice. I pulled back a bit, "B-King Bowser? Let me help you—"

"I s-said I'm f-fine!" He growled, face inexplicably red.

"Stop being stubborn and let me help you," I placed a hand on his bicep.

Bowser halted, then broke into a grin, "Well I suppose sometimes even the King of Koopas needs help."

I smiled, "Okay, here just hold onto me as I keep you steady."

He grinned wickedly "Hold on to you!? _Gladly_!"

One of Bowser's hands gripped my hand as the other wrapped around my waist. I watched as he wobbled onto his feet unsteadily. With one last push, Bowser rose to his feet, gaining his balance, "There, good now?"

"Yeah I'm good Flower," he was still grinning.

I went to catch up with the rest of the group. Bowser wobbled on his feet, smirking happily. Wolfe skated by, shooting a glare his way, "…_Jackass_! I saw that whole thing. Bet you did it just to cop a feel."

Puppo growled, mirroring his master's emotions. Bowser laughed, "You're just mad 'cause you didn't think of it first!"

"Yeah…" Wolfe glared at the back of Bowser's head, "But _he _doesn't have to know that…"

* * *

><p>The next stop was a gigantic ice-rink. Silver turned to us and began to narrate,"T-These are our hockey rings, t-the national Moonstonian team holds practices here and—"<p>

"I want to play hockey!" Wolfe blurted out, "Can we take a few shots on goal?!"

Silver blinked, "Well...If you'd like to...?"

He turned to look at me shyly, "Would y-you like that princess?"

"Sure! I don't mind firing off a few shots!"

A hand fell on my shoulder. It was the Moonstonian queen. She smiled, "I was thinking something else for the ladies. How about we chat over tea?"

I froze; I _hated_ tea time. Hated it. Nothing but aimless chatter, gossip and frivolous pleasantries. I'd rather play tonsil hockey with Petey Piranha than have tea time. But as a visitor, I forced a smile to my face, "Oh yes. That sounds..._wonderful_."

The queen smiled, "Great. Ladies please follow me."

I turned and stared at the ice-rink longingly. The guys had divided into teams and were playing a game. It looked like so much fun, Silver and Luigi laughed as Wolfe high-fived a servant. Why did being a girl revolve around boys, dresses and tea?! I hate tea!

"_Pichi_ you comin' along?"

"Yeah...I am."

The queen led us to a large sitting room filled with crystal furniture, "We have everything prepared for a nice brunch—"

A flurry of blue, baby penguins invaded the room. Some nestled in the furniture chirping contently, others squeaked, sliding around the floors. And some of the penguins were on the dining table eating our brunch. The queen looked scandalized as I laughed at the lively penguins.

"Oh! Pardon me ladies but I thought I told Silver to put his pets away!" We went over towards the table, "Get off the furniture you feathered ruffians! Shoo! _Shoo!"_

The penguins laughed, sliding on their bellies, leaping over furniture and nibbling at the tea pastries. I laughed as the queen chased futilely. They were quick slippery little thieves, effortlessly dodging the queen and making off with the desserts.

She cornered a penguin with a cookie in its mouth. And just when she advanced, it slid under her dress and fluttered across the room, gobbling the cookie. That took all my willpower not to laugh.

That stunt snapped the last thread of the queen's patience. She blushed rose-red and called in a legion of servants to herd the mischievous pets. A couple penguins slid by, giving Grammy and I curious looks. Once they realized we had no treats, they were disinterested.

The servants shooed off the last of the penguins who flapped and fluttered out of the room in a gale of squeaks and squawks. I doubled over and laughed as Grammy smiled. The queen looked terribly harried, face still flushed, "I'm afraid Silver and I are going to have a 'chat' about this."

Grammy grinned, "It's fine Queen Titania."

The pastry chefs prepared a fresh tray of goodies, warm beverages and we were eating in no time flat. The Moonstonian hot chocolate was to die for.

"What do you think of our kingdom thus far?" The queen asked with a soft smile.

"It's gorgeous," I smiled, helping myself to seconds.

"It is quite beautiful," Grammy hummed, "I never thought a kingdom of ice could be so elegant and refined. I've lived in a desert for my entire life so this is quite the culture shock!"

Titania laughed, "I can only imagine."

"I've been wondering something," I shoved a cookie into my mouth.

"What is it dear?" The queen sipped her cocoa.

"Where...Where is the king?"

"Who?"

"Your king."

The queen fumbled with her tea saucer.

_Uh oh. _It hit the side of the table and shattered upon impact. She reached to collect the glass as I quickly reached down to help her, "Here, let me do it. I'm such a dumbass."

"N-No dearie it's fine," the queen seemed frantic, "I have it."

I tried to pick up the porcelain shards but the queen was faster. Her hands rattled and a sharp shard sliced into her finger until a red spot welled on her glove. Her face grew pale at the sight of the blooming, swelling blood.

"_Sheyt_," I swore.

"I-I-I'm fine," Queen Titania gasped; eyelashes fluttering as she clutched her throbbing finger. She was anything _but _fine, "L-Let's carry on with tea please..."

Grammy took the queen's hand, "Lemme see this dearie."

She pulled off Titania's glove to reveal a deep laceration. The sight of blood made the queen's face grow even paler.

"Oh this one's not too bad," Grammy smiled, "I have a tale for you about my sons."

"W-What's it about?" The queen shivered.

"One day my boys were playing kickball," Grammy spoke softly, taking a napkin and wrapping it around the wound, "and while I was in a meeting with the king of Yo'ster's island, guess what I hear?"

"What...?"

Grammy applied pressured, holding the queen's digit firmly, "I'm told my youngest son fell into quicksand."

The queen was stunned, "My Stars! Were you scared? Worried?!"

"Oh course! I got there as soon as I could. When I got there he was buried up to his chest. Apricotto was crying and screaming sayings his good byes to the world."

Grammy chuckled, "I told him 'If you stop struggling, you won't sink anymore.' So he stopped struggling and we were able to pull him out as easy as pie. And now that you've calmed down..."

Grammy pulled her hand away and the bleeding had decreased significantly, "You will be fine. Just like Apricotto."

The queen blinked. Wait; even if you stopped struggling in quicksand you still sank only slower. Did Grammy lie to uncle?! Grammy took ice, wrapped it into a napkin and applied it to the wound, "And this will numb the pain."

The queen smiled, still icing the wound, "T-Thank you Queen Sarasaland."

"No problem dear."

Titania looked at me, "My dear husband died this past year and I'm afraid it's still a rather raw wound."

The Moonstone queen smiled sadly as I sighed, "Sorry, I thought he was away on business..."

"I'm sorry for your loss," Grammy touched the queen's hand. Touch, save for an impersonal handshake was against royal protocol. But the Moonstonian queen seemed to appreciate the warmth as she wiped her eyes.

"My husband has been dead for decades," Grammy was contemplative.

"How did you deal with his loss?" Titania sniffled, "I...I miss him so. Somedays I still break down and cry and others I wake up and think it's all a bad dream..."

"It gets better dear," Grammy squeezed her good hand, "Silver needs you."

"My sweet Silver," the queen smiled, pink lips drawn into a cupid's bow, "He hasn't been the same since his father's death. He's been so withdrawn, so quiet. He's edgy and stutters noticeably."

I blinked, "You mean he wasn't always shy?"

"Stars no," the queen laughed, "he was charming, social and quite the lady's man."

I raised an eyebrow; Silver? _Silver_ was a ladykiller?!

"He's become so withdrawn, he took the loss the hardest," the queen closed her eyes, "Since my husband's death I've been running the kingdom with the help of our gracious council. I...I was hoping matrimony could bring my son out of his shell. I've tried everything and am at my wit's end...he's come of marrying age and...I've heard the desert people were of good character...that Emperor Sakuro was a fair king and would have a good daughter for my son..."

"Your son is a fine young man," Grammy soothed, "he will find his way soon. And rumor is correct for once, my son is a good man and he's raised a splendid young lady."

The queen looked at me through teary eyes, "Princess my son has been through much turmoil in these recent years. He watched his father grow ill, weakened from disease. I can't put him through any more hardship. Please...be...be kind to him. Even if you do not choose to marry him..."

"Queen," I smiled, "you don't have to worry. I will...I won't break his heart. That's not my style."

She sniffled, "Thank you young lady. If you choose my son, he will be a wonderful husband. He will be kind, he will listen, provide and defend. You may not know him in and out yet but he has a warm and pure heart."

I smiled.

"Now then, I think you should prepare for dinner. Silver has just the place picked out for you to dine."

I curtsied and walked out. I peered back at the queen one last time. Grammy was standing over her, speaking softly. Then they hugged. I smiled, turning on my way to go. Then I realized something.

"Uh...where the hell am I going?"

* * *

><p>"These are your quarters for the evening," a maid gestured to the large doors ahead, "Your suitors will be in the adjacent chambers."<p>

"And therefore this door has locks?" Grammy grinned, as the maid laughed.

I groaned as the maid answered with a grin, "Quite sturdy my queen."

I sighed, "Grammy..."

"Princess," the maid smiled, "as you are visiting our kingdom, we would like to properly submerge you into our culture."

"How so?"

"Follow me if you will."

We entered the room which surprisingly was much warmer than the surrounding castle. There was even a heater and these floors were carpeted.

"I guess you Moonstonians realize everyone else can't survive the insane cold like you," I laughed.

"We realize our guests aren't quite as adept to the cold as we are. It's awfully hot in here!"

Grammy laughed, "Wrong, you're just used to the cold! It's probably barely fifty degrees in here."

The maid laughed, before bowing, "We would like to dress you as a Moonstonian princess. Is that okay?"

"Sure!"

"Empress we have clothing for you as well."

"Great! And here I thought I'd stew into a jealous rage."

A box was placed in my hands, "This is a gift from our beloved queen. Please enjoy."

"A gift!" Grammy was excited, "Open it _Pichi!_"

I shredded away the gift wrap and gasped; inside was a beautiful black fur coat. It was long enough to reach my ankles and when I hugged the thick fur, it was so soft. Grammy received an identical gift, only hers was pure white. I pulled on the coat carefully as the maids started to comb my hair. Once it was smooth, they tied it into a sleek bun.

Thousands of tiny, sparkling gem pins were littered in my hair to shimmer like dew under the morning sun. The makeup used was cool, icy blue eyeshadow and soft pink lipstick. The beauty of the Moonstone princess mirrored the snow and ice around her; cool subtle colors.

The maids chuckled; there was no powder in my complexion since their women were fair like sheets of snow. And I was tan like a cup of mocha. I studied my reflection; I didn't look half bad. If this is what I'd have to wear as a Moonstonian queen then this was bearable.

Grammy appeared by my side, "As usual you look stunning _Pichi_. Ready to have fun with Silver?"

"I guess."

I reentered the throne room where the boys were talking about...

"I mean I liked Reese, but Brett was just awesome."

Stars they really did like the 'chick flick'! Maybe I should loan them the DVD. A maid cleared her throat, "Entering her ladyship, Princess Sarasaland."

Heads craned my direction as I skated over. Bowser's expression visibly brightened as Luigi smiled, nodding his approval. Silver appeared the most impressed. His complexion was so fair it was obvious when he blushed.

"Y-You look t-truly enchanting," he said softly, "L-Like a true Moonstonian lady."

"Thank you Prince Silver," I beamed, "So tonight it's just you and me, so where shall we go?"

Bowser's expression darkened,"_What?!"_

Ryu peered over, "Lord Koopa the princess is to tour each of our kingdoms."

"Like I didn't know that! But what's this funny business about her 'going off alone'?!"

Ryu didn't bat an eyelash, "The princess will spend a night alone with each of her suitors. This will allow the princess to better understand—"

Smoke billowed from the king's jowls, "And here I thought you were smart. But you can't be if you just said what I thought. No one is going to 'spend a night alone' with her."

Wolfe laughed, "I'm not happy about it either King Bowser but you don't see me whining. Just relax."

"Whining? What will you think when my fist meets your face?!" He growled viciously.

Wolfe jerked away, all humor gone. Something about his golden eyes became more feral as his expression grew severe, "Hey, _chill_. Out."

For a moment they were staring each other down with stern gazes and squared shoulders. Bowser's maw smoldered with smoke as Wolfe, though relaxed, held his firm stare. Ryu, who had been formerly watching everything with lukewarm interest suddenly became vigilant at the tense showdown. He stepped closer, ready to step in if need be.

"Staring down a Koopa?" Taurus sounded amused, "Either he's brave or really stupid."

"L-Let's all-a be friends, yes?" Luigi placated.

"Shut up Greenstache."

"_Aw.._."

_Sheyt_ this could be a potential fight. I didn't want Bowser killing, roasting, punching, biting, kicking anyone. It sounded outlandish but this _was_ Bowser. I could very well see him ripping someone apart.

"King Bowser," I spoke softly, "May I speak to you privately?"

Bowser perked up, the bloodthirsty haze disappearing from his features. He shot Wolfe one last dirty look before following. I walked until I was sure we were out of hearing range. We could be ourselves.

"Is...Is this crap true?!" He asked, "You're gonna spend an entire night with these idiots?!"

His crimson eyes were bright with vulnerability. I could clearly see his concern.

"Bowser...I think you have this all wrong. I'm not going to spend _all_ night with them. We will spend time together. Like a date."

He sneered, "And what if I'm not cool with that?! You don't know who these pervs are."

I sighed, laughing a bit, "Bowser they're not pervs. Well, not all of them..."

"Nope they all are."

This made me grin, "Luigi?"

"Plumber pervert."

"Silver?"

"It's obvious; closet pervert."

I was laughing now, "Wolfe?"

"Bestiality pervert."

I choked on my laughter, "Ryu? Please don't even try it..."

"I'm sure he's the worst perv of all. All quiet and serious. If those aren't the signs of a major perv then I dunno what is."

I smirked, "What are you then Bowser? What kind of perv is the Koopa king?"

"Oh that guy? He's just a sexy, ripped badass."

"Lying pervert," I laughed.

He grinned despite himself. Then his sharp smile morphed into a frown, "I still don't like the idea of you with...those _guys_ alone..."

"Nothing will happen. I'm pretty sure I can kick their butts."

He growled, "Make this easier on us both and don't go with them..."

"I have to. This is a part of the arrangement," I stared passed his shoulder.

I thought of Silver's weeping mother. A mother who wanted her son happy; he had been through much recently and I was not going to escalate his problems. Truthfully, the whole idea of trying to find my husband terrified me, and I felt nowhere near ready to become a wife. But I was going to do this. For Father, for Grammy, for Sarasaland's greater good.

"I'm going to marry one of these men," I stared past his armored bicep, "I don't want to marry someone who's selfish and wants to mold me into a woman I'm not. I don't want a guy who will force me into a subservient, docile queen. This is my only chance to find someone who I might...possibly grow to love. And I can't explain how I know...But the right guy is here. He's going to be okay with me ruling over Sarasaland and he...He'll accept me for all my quirks and shortcomings. I _feel_ it."

When I looked up, Bowser's expression was closed, face stern, "You're right. He's here."

I smiled.

He grinned with no humor, "But I'm starting to think he's gonna have to do something drastic and club you over the head with his affections or something."

I smiled, "So can I go? Knowing you won't tear this place apart in my absence?"

Bowser laughed, "I'll compromise: if you're back before ten then I won't kill these people. Deal?"

I sighed, "Deal. Now be good."

"When am I ever good?"

"...Hmm. I see your point."

We returned where the others were waiting in the common area. Though Bowser was relatively more settled, it was obvious he was still angry but at least he wouldn't attempt murder. I looked at Silver, "So where to chief?"

He was silent, "I h-have just the place you might l-like princess."

"Have a good evening," Ryu's silky smooth voice wafted to my ears pleasantly. When I peered back at him, his neutral expression warmed, blue eyes brighter.

"I will," I smiled back at the suitors.

Wolfe cupped a large palm over his mouth to augment his voice. Grinning largely, he loudly proclaimed, "_Hey_! You bring her back or we'll hunt you down and kill ya, got that Moon boy?!"

The suitors chuckled but Wolfe blinked, peering around with stupor "...Huh? What's so funny? I'm_ dead_ serious about that."

As we walked away, I could feel someone's stare on my back. Bowser was staring, expression troubled with deeply furrowed brows and a clenched jaw. I gave him a thumbs up to show I was going to be just fine. He said nothing and looked away; _be cool Bowwy, I'll be back soon._

* * *

><p>We took a beautiful, glittering carriage to the critically acclaimed Snowflake restaurant. The night with Silver was enjoyable, though he needed to relax more. He was chivalrous, making sure to open my doors and help me down the slippery sloping steps of the carriage. He read my body language for any signs of discomfort and responded accordingly. At the first sign of a shiver, he had promptly taken off his outer coat and carefully placed it upon my shoulders.<p>

When I smiled and thanked him, again his cheeks burned red, but this time he smiled, quietly uttering a, "you're welcome" under his breath. The _Snowflake_ glowed against the dark night sky in an illustrious white aura of light.

Once we reached the door, Silver scrambled ahead to open the doors, bowing genially. When we locked stares, his milky-white complexion glowed with the brilliance of a garnet. I laughed; it was clear he was nervous. He was almost as clumsy as I was and stammered twice as badly.

I picked up on his cute habit of twiddling his thumbs and fidgeting nervously. I tried to tell him to relax, but all he did was blush and appear even more jittery than before. We entered, delicate ice sculptures looming as tall as the ceiling and beautiful marble fountains added an air of sophistication.

A headwaiter appeared and spoke in fluid Moonstonian. He laughed, fondly patting Silver's shoulder and smiled my direction, clearly waiting for an introduction. Silver motioned to him, "T-This is Jacques. Jacques this is Princess Daisy. _Jacques, ceci est Daisy de Princesse_."

"_Greetis_, _mi fille,_" he bowed, taking my hand and planting a kiss.

"Hello right back Jacques," I smiled.

This Jacques guy spoke in rapid Moonstonian and in the blink of an eye, he scrambled off. He peered back, grinning and motioning us to follow. I laughed, "He's a lively one huh?"

"Yes," Silver laughed, "H-He's an old family friend. Always saves the best seats for us and h-he was good friends with my father."

Again everyone was on skates, gliding beautifully to and fro as they waited on their customers. This was mind-blowing; the staff balanced dishes on trays and delivered food on skates. We took our seat, a table in the center of the restaurant on the second floor. Our seats overlooked the entire restaurant and the scenic view outside.

The live band began to play soft chords of music, filling the background with soothing noise. Jacques babbled in lighting-fast Moonstonian before scuttling away. Silver pulled out my chair, then sat himself. With nothing but tea to tie over my appetite I was starved! Licking my lips, I peeled the menu open. Then I froze.

Hmm. Well this makes things interesting...The menu was written completely in Moonstonian script. While I admired the subtle elegance and beauty of the flowing calligraphy, I couldn't understand what I was seeing!

"Is s-something the matter princess?" The soft timbre of Silver's voice floated across the table.

I was beginning to see that little went unnoticed with Silver; though quiet and thoughtful, his power of observation were quite keen. The Moonstonian prince gauged my expression with polite interest. Under the soft light of the restaurant, his white hair was brought aglow in a glinting halo as his blue eyes seemed impossibly bright. You know, when Silver wasn't so flustered, he was kind of dreamy and his large blue eyes gave him a darling, wide-eyed air of innocence.

"Oh, it's nothing too bad," I laughed as I showed the menu, "It's just I can't read a lick of this."

Silver stared,".._.Oops_."

The prince blinked, cheeks burning red at a mental miscalculation. But then I was rewarded by the sound of his laughter. I never heard Silver laugh before. He was quiet, fidgety even but the sound of his laugh was pleasant. When he relaxed, he was pretty handsome; his milk-white hair and bright eyes gave an ethereal glow.

"I-I'm sorry princess," he was grinning, running a hand through his hair in slight frustration. Although his face was pink, he seemed more amused than anything, "I hope you'll forgive me for this blunder. Sometimes I can be such a fool."

"Fool? Where?" I grinned, even making a show to look around the restaurant, "I see no idiot, just a nice boy with a nice smile."

I grinned wider at his obvious blush, "Erm…t-t-t-thank you. I c-could translate the menu for you. Anything in particular you want…?"

"Steak," I said instantly, "I'm starving. You guys _do_ steak in this kingdom, right?"

Silver blinked stupidly, "You really want…steak?"

I arched an eyebrow, "Is there anything wrong with steak?"

"Erm no! Not at all," he smiled, holding his hands up defensively, "It's just that…most women would usually order a salad or something light in the presence of an interested suitor."

Right. He still believes I'm a girly-girl. Let's rid him of _such _nonsensical thoughts in a hurry. If I wasn't on a date I'd kick my feet up on the table and talk about sports.

"Well prince," I smirked, "I'm really not like most princesses as you will come to find out."

He chuckled, "So I'm learning."

"Call me Daisy," I waved my hand dismissively, "We can be informal if that's fine with you? I like you and that's all that matters."

"That's p-perfect," he smiled, crystalline blues shimmering.

"So, do you like ice skating?" I asked, making sure to start a conversation about something he knew.

"Of course," he smiled teasingly, "My kingdom is _only_ ninety five percent snow and ice."

"Talking smack on the first date, huh?" I grinned.

Silver laughed again, "Truth be told, I like hockey much more than ice skating. It's actually a game of teamwork, dedication and stratagem. You see..."

"So beating the crap out of people doesn't interest you?" I laughed as a wicked smile cut across his face.

"Speaking of fights, did you watch the game where the Sarasaland SandSharks played against the Mushroom Maniacs? And _that _was a fight," Silver spoke with a grin.

_"Oh my Stars._ Oh my _frickin'_ Stars," I gasped dramatically, even slapping the table down with both of my palms, "did you _see _that right hook Starhook gave Lighthawk!? He kicked his ass _good."_

Silver laughed largely, his mellifluous laughter carrying and it wasn't even moments later when Jacques came to take our order. Silver fluidly switched into the graceful lilts of Moonstonian and translated my order. Hearing the airy, fluid language from Silver's lips was wonderful. It was as if he was talking and chanting in a single breath. "Wow."

He was surprised, "'Wow'? Pardon my candor but wow what?"

"Your language is beautiful! "Teach me how to say something!"

He made a contemplative look, "Hmm...v-very well then, repeat after me please."

"Repeat after me please."

Silver laughed, "_Zolik sa rina."_

The words sounded so light and airy but on my tongue they were heavy like lead,_"Zo…lick…s arena…"_

"Not bad," Silver grinned broadly as Jacques laughed.

Something told me I really _sucked, "Hey! _Don't laugh! You should be putting in our order anyways!"

The waiter left, nearly skipping through the restaurant; yep Jacques was a lively one for sure. Silver nodded his head, "Your accent is a bit off but it was clear what you were saying."

"And what was that Silv?"

The prince chuckled and although his cheeks rouged, he smiled archly for an introvert, "That you're amazing."

"Oh," now it was my turn to blush.

"So…" Silver glanced down at his lap before meeting my stare, "Y-You don't find this whole marriage thing a b-bit…daunting?"

"Oh! C_ompletely!_" I grinned, "I was_ so_ nervous yesterday I didn't get a goodnight's rest."

Silver smiled softly, "Really? Me too. I suppose it's natural f-for us to be a bit anxious. After all, we're both trying to see if you're the person to marry."

"Yeah," I smiled softly.

Dinner arrived in a grandeur of delicate porcelain and delicious dishes. Silver introduced me to the popular Moonstonian beverage called 'snow wine.' It was delicious, a sweet and light wine that was smooth like honey.

_The Snowflake _was worthy of its critical praise; my steak was cooked perfectly, mouthwatering juices dribbling each time I cut into the meat and Jacques was probably one of the most doting, attentive waiters I've ever had. Silver chewed fresh seafood and steamed vegetables, clearly pleased by the delicious meal.

"Here, you have to try this steak," I grinned, "It's amazing."

I offered my fork, grinning at his abashed visage, "T-That's quite a-alright. I w-want you to enjoy it. I—"

A mischievous smirk tugged at my lips as I shoved the fork into his mouth. His eyes snapped open at the sudden intrusion as I laughed, pulling my fork away. Surprise slowly melted into consideration as he chewed thoughtfully.

"Actually that is quite delicious."

I was surprised when a rather mischievous look crossed his face, "I owe you for that one."

I grinned, _"Ooh_, it looks like I've already corrupted the nice guy prince."

"Just a little bit," he laughed softly.

I smirked, "Hey, you're not stuttering anymore."

He looked thoughtful, "I guess not. But I'm not...nervous anymore. You're just so...carefree and easy to be around, you know?"

I smiled, "I'll chalk that up as a victory."

Silver snorted, smirking as he continued to finish up his plate. I was starting to loosen him up and by the evening's end, I had him laughing at my asinine jokes. Granted, compared to his refined, urbane laughter, I sounded like a drunk hyena.

Before leaving, we tipped Jacques rather nicely. He was tipped so well in fact, he did a double take,eyes wide before grinning wildly and snatching me into a huge, warm hug. I pulled away and beamed, "You gave such wonderful service! Thank you!"

Jacques smirked and spoke, "You are welcome."

I halted.

Silver laughed.

Hey! He could speak English!?

I laughed, "Why didn't you say anything!? I feel so..._betrayed!"_

I was partial surprised, and partially really amused when Silver shot a sly smirk my way, "Well, now we're even for the fork thing."

I gasped; he had _pulled one over on me_?! I was _so _proud. Already I was influencing him, corrupting the innocent, well-mannered good boy. I glared playfully at Jacques who raised his hand defensively, "Was funny yes?"

"Kinda! But you guys are jerks!" I laughed, punching my index finger at Jacques.

"We are not jerks," he laughed, "Come back again and visit _fille._"

"I will, but next time no more pranks!"

We walked outside the restaurant, cold air making our breaths materialize in frosty puffs of condensation. I smiled at Silver and playfully punched his shoulder, "Well, I had a great evening Silv."

"As did I princess," his eyes glowed bright with mirth, "Ready to return to the palace for rest?"

"Sure."

"You know," he watched as I spoke, wintry white brows raised to indicate his interest. The purple sky of twilight glowed, littering ribbons of lavender streaks in his hair,"I used to think this whole thing—this marriage arrangement would be a nightmare. But if all my other suitors are as wonderful and as genuine as you…then perhaps this is a dream…"

"Princess," his warm hands gently touched my elbow, baby blue eyes soft like a calm sea, "I think you are phenomenal…Any man would be foolish to look passed you."

"Even though I'm clumsy and completely unladylike?" I pondered out loud.

I was surprised when Silver laughed deeply. Again, it struck me that I really liked the sound of his laughter; when he wasn't stuttering and nervous, his voice was deep and smooth.

"Daisy..." he shook his head, still smiling as he chided tenderly, "You ought to stop with the self-depreciation. Especially when there are no flaws to be found."

My cheeks flamed from embarrassment, "B-But it's true! I...I really am and—!"

He gently interrupted,"Not to be too bold, but I honestly _cherish_ those traits about you. You're honest, funny and even if you aren't 'ladylike' I think you're still very attractive."

If I was blushing before, I was blushing twice as badly now. His eyes softened as he spoke in a low whisper, "You're…exceptional…"

The next thing I knew, his warm breath caressed my cheek, followed by a soft brush of heated lips upon the apple of my cheek. The warm lips lingered for a few seconds before pulling away. My face tingled pleasantly, cheeks flushed from where his lips had been prior. I turned to meet his stare and there I found twinkling eyes, a melting smile and slightly mussed white locks of silk that danced under the soft wind. My heart raced as I bit my lip indecisively; I had to find out if he was the one. If there could be more to us.

Before he stood upright, I grabbed the back of his head, fingers tangling in his silky hair as I pressed our lips together. The same tingling, lovely warmth magnified wonderfully. I pulled back, cheeks flooded with color at such a blood move. Stars, I had _never_ initiated a kiss so brazenly before. I peered up at Silver whose gorgeous blue eyes were wide with surprise.

His cheeks were dark against his fair complexion and his utter surprise had me backtracking, "Uh…I'm s-sorry. I-I didn't mean to do something so stupid. I only wanted to—"

A large palm cupped my face and pulled me back towards his gentle, soft mouth. The cold of the night faded away as the warmth spread through my system like melted honey. We both pulled back, flushed and smiling.

* * *

><p>As I walked beside Silver, I snuck a quick glance at him; he was nearly my inverse in each and every way possible: where I was loud and brazen, he was quiet and timorous. I was borderline short as he was the textbook definition of tall and slender. I had a swarthy, mocha complexion as his skin was milk-white. Though we were opposites, we seemed to coexist harmoniously.<p>

As the thick flurry of snow enveloped the town, the cold nipped at us, reddening cheeks and noses. Delicate snowflakes drifted into my outstretched palms and upon contact they melted into nothingness. Smiling, I glanced up at Silver.

His expression was peaceful, posture at ease with the erasure of the usual nervousness. His salt-colored hair nearly faded into the background of white, fresh snow. His features were angular and defined in all the right ways with the aid of adulthood and yet there was something about his blue eyes that seemed innocent and childlike.

He smiled as melted snowflakes twinkled in his hair like gems. If I married the delicate prince of the Moonstone kingdom, would I be upset if I lived here with him? Could I see myself as his queen?

Ruling over the kingdom of ice and crystal, snow and frost? I was from a world of heat and sand, an inverse of this kingdom. Could I see myself giving birth to a beautiful child with his delicate features, snowy white hair and icicle-blue eyes?

"Watch your step, Milady," his deep voice rumbled softly. He took my hand as I entered the warm carriage, making sure I found my seat safely. Once I was settled in, he entered, closing the door.

He was thoughtful, kind and generous. Chivalry was a high priority on his list and it didn't seem like a chore as it was for most men his age. Being kind seemed second nature as breathing. This entire evening he was conscious of my feelings, my presence and did all in his power to make sure I was perfectly happy.

Would I be put off if I had to marry a patient, sweet man like him? Would I mind having a husband like him? One who would listen to my every word, wipe my tears and have my back every step of the way?

I smiled; no I don't think I would.

* * *

><p>Bowser held a videophone to his ear, impatiently strumming his claws against the desk in a quick rhythm. Then the call connected and the image of a boo appeared.<p>

"_Mmmmyellow?_"

"Patch me through to King Boo would ya?"

"_I'm sorry but this is Fright n' delight pizza, customers DIE for our pizza. May I spook your order?_"

"Yeah how about a large shut the hell up with extra cheese and a side of patch me through now or I'll kick your teeth in."

_"Oh, King Bowser!_" The boo grinned impishly, "_why didn't you just say so_?"

"Idiot! I can _see_ you," he exclaimed, "We can see each other. It's a Star damn video phone!"

Damn these ghosts were nutty. Boos loved playing mindgames with people. _I understand why Mario kicks the crud out of these damn ghosts. If ya can't get a straight answer out of em then beat them 'til you do. Or stare at them; they have that weird, shy-complex crap._

Then he was sent to voice mail. The responding voice was deep, guttural and sounded like a demonic entity, _"You have reached the voice mail of the illustrious King Boo. If you are an abominable mortal bill collector then may you think __**again**__. We have not paid mortgage on the haunted manor since the seventeenth century and if you leave a message, we will hunt you down, suck out your soul and make your fleshy body perform appalling jigs and crude gestures for our personal merriment. In the case you are not a bill collector...then please leave your message after the shriek. Thank you._"

There was a loud keening wail followed by insidious laughter, then Bowser started his message, "Ichabod it's me, Bowser. Uh...I need your advice on something. It's super important so the sooner you reply back the—"

The gigantic boo suddenly materialized before the phone camera, grinning wickedly. He was looking around everywhere but at the phone's camera, "_My friend! Ah, it makes my heartless heart soar with joy to see you!"_

"Ichabod," Bowser tried not to laugh, "you're facing the wrong way."

"_Huh? Oh._"

The Boo turned around and grinned, "_It is good to see you. Let me press this device to raise the volume of speech patterns we project_—"

King Boo and technology went as well as booze and a wiggler; nothing but a real shitshow.

But an amusing one nonetheless. The screen suddenly went black and this time Bowser did laugh. The boo's snarls of frustration only made it more funny.

"_What the dickens?!_"

Bowser roared with laughter, "_Confound it! This blasted contraption!_"

"Icky, see the red button?"

"_Yes I see the damned thing."_

"Hit it."

The boo appeared. He blinked before throwing his head back with dark laughter, _"Yes! Yeeees! Again I am found victorious! The fates have shown their favor upon thee!"_

As the boo king laughed, Bowser saw the ghost's fangs were covered in red liquid.

_"Now that the matter of technology has been settled, to what do I owe this pleasure? For a second I thought I'd have the joy of destroying another one of those wretched 'bill collectors' as they call themselves. Blood sucking leeches they are. And I_ **like** _blood sucking leeches so that's an insult to them._"

Bowser coughed into his fist, "Uh Icky?"

"_Yes?_"

"I think you got..." Bowser cleared his throat, "You got something on your teeth..."

The king didn't want to say _blood_ because he didn't want to be an accessory to murder.

"_Oh pardon me_," the ghost turned his back for a few seconds then faced forward with white teeth, "_You caught me in the middle of...oh let's say...'lunch'._"

"What were you eating?"

Wait. He shouldn't have asked.

"_...Oh nothing important._"

"That's fine. I don't really car—"

"_Just...something. I like my meat a bit 'rare' if you know what I mean_..."

"Good. So how about—"

"_That meant I ate something while it was alive._"

"I _get_ that..." Bowser tried not to squirm.

"_I bit its' neck, barbecued it's organs, sucked out all its' blood and then devour—_"

"Star damn!" Bowser growled, "I said I got it!"

As King Boo laughed with dark glee, Bowser groaned. _Stars I really need to get some new friends. But bad company is so hard to find these days._

He changed topics, trying to ignore the way his scales crawled from their interaction, "_So_...how is the manor?"

"_Oh it's perfectly dreadful; termites in the floor, the roof is coming into pieces, floor boards hit people in the ass when they walk by..._"

King Boo sighed happily, "_Everything is great!_"

"So I take it. How's Bow doing?"

"_My little girl is just as bootiful as her mother. Can you believe it? In a few weeks she'll turn 1,400 years old. I remember when she was but a babe."_

"Keeping the boos off her?"

"_I will posses any boo who tries to court my darling!_" The boo snarled viciously, "... _I presume you called for a reason..._?"

"I uh..." Bowser cleared his throat before tugging uneasily at the collar of his shell, "I have some problems I need help with. Kinda delicate you know?"

"_Ah I see. Be sure to use the entire tube of 'Itch-B-gone' and it'll help with the itching and burning._"

"N-Not those kind of problems!" Bowser groaned, slapping a claw to his forehead, "I mean like...Like girly problems."

"_Oh? Please go into details_," The boo looked interested, "_And do not skip a single one or else I will consider possessing you. I just learned how to do this funny little jig..._"

"Princess Daisy is out on dates with other guys!" Bowser growled, knuckles popping as he coiled his hand into a fist, "With losers! Everytime they look at her I want to pound the snot out of them! But in human society it's considered 'good manners' not to punch people in the face."

The boo sighed, "_They don't beat each other into pulps? I just don't understand those barbarians and their ways.._."

"I know right?"

"_Hmm,_" King Boo rubbed his chin, "T_his does pose quite a problem. Suitors have entered the fray! Ready to battle for the affections of your woman! Well then my friend you have come to the right boo! I shall provide you with the sharpest spear! The weapon to take her soul!"_

"Uh...?" Bowser arched an eyebrow,

"._..I meant heart_." The boo backtracked cleanly.

"Right..." Bowser felt less and less sure as they continued.

Maybe coming to Icky was a terrible idea.

"_There is nothing that confesses stronger love than a ballet, a sonata of love!"_ The boo sighed happily, even clapping his hands together at the thought of romance.

"I tried that on another girl, "Bowser grumbled, "And Daisy laughed her ass off!"

"_Yes_," the boo grinned, fangs glinting, "_I saw that wretched display as well. From one baddie to another it was a total abomination. The gods of music _shat_ the moment they heard such discordance._"

"You saw it?!" Bowser's voice didn't break, because it would have been completely unmanly.

"_My dear Koopa the world has seen that blunder_!" King Boo boomed with laughter, "_It's all over Koopatube._"

Bowser's face paled, "It...It is?"

King Boo, while laughing, turned a laptop screen towards him, "_This is perhaps the only device of the twenty-first century I am quite knowledgeable of! It is pleasant and amusing to see what atrocities are placed on this thing called the world wide web. Now then, look at the screen which will project the hilarious imagery!_"

Bowser stuck his face against the screen to watch. The laptop glowed to life, showing a video of the Koopa king, down on one knee, playing an off-key ukulele He sang miserably, sounding like Piranha Petey's mating yowl.

"Peeeeach! Oh my darling Peeeeach! Let's talk a walk on the beeeach! Mario's a leeech! Listen to me as I beeesech!"

A disembodied feminine voice off-camera spoke, "What's that sound? Its scared off all the grazing cataquacks."

A second female voice, this one deeper in timbre, "Some animal's in pain. I got a bbgun and we can take care of it discreetly."

"What does that mean?"

"...That means we'll put it out of its misery P."

Peach and Daisy appeared on the balcony, peering down at the king. They both looked at each other, stunned for a moment then Daisy burst out laughing. Her shrill laughter was enough to stop Bowser's terrible singing as he blinked up at her. Daisy had doubled over, tears streaming down her face as Peach tried to hide her amusement.

"_Oh Stars_," Daisy continued to laugh, "It was his singing we heard! Someone shoot me now!"

This time Peach tittered, joining in the laughter palooza. Both girls clutched their stomachs, laughing loudly as Bowser's face bled maroon from anger and embarrassment. The video ended with Bowser snarling, snapping the ukulele over his knee and starting to climb up Princess Peach's balcony.

As King Boo laughed, Bowser blushed, cheeks a rich strawberry-red as he snarled furiously; it was a crushing blow to his inflated ego to watch Daisy laugh at him. He'd rather let Mario kick him in the 'nads then have her laugh at his expense!

"**Who the_ hell_ posted that _damn_ video_?!_**" He boomed furiously, "I'm gonna find them and glue their head to their ass!"

"_Oh Bowser_," King Boo sighed deeply, "Koopa_tube is filled with your blunders. It's a treasure chest, nay! A goldmine of all your terrific failiures! Want to hear the video titles? 'Mario kicks Bowser's ass' 'Mario punches Bowser through ten walls.' 'Mario punches Bowser through ten walls then does the victory sign' 'Mario hops on Bowser's head' I'm very sure Koopatube was founded on your foolishness._"

Bowser's jaw snapped shut, "How... long has this _crud_ been up there?! Is...Is _Daisy_ able to see that?!"

"_For six years or so. And anyone with these..computing devices...and tops that sit on your lap, can view it_."

Bowser growled; he was going to find these Koopatube people and have a nice long 'chat' with them. A chat involving his fists, knuckles and insurmountable pain.

"Well that's not what I want to look like. S-She laughed!"

"_It is the mark of sanity, for any sane woman would have laughed_." Bowser growled, slapping a palm to his forehead.

"_Oh! Do not feel of blueness my friend! Just think of something bootastical to raise your spirits!_"

He growled, "Yeah? Like what? And Mario kicking my ass isn't funny."

King Boo laughed, "_Cheer up my Koopa friend. Oh! I have just the tale!"_

The ghost covered his mouth and chuckled like a schoolgirl, "_Remember...that one time we went on a panty raid? At the Flutter Shell Girls' dormitory in the Koopette academy? It was great 'til we accidentally nabbed the old, blind, crotchety headmistress's bloomers. Stars those things were probably manufactured in the forties._"

Bowser exploded with laughter, "Oh Stars! That was awesome! So much lace and frills. Ah we collected a fine harvest that night."

"_And on your bachelor party_?" The boo grinned, "_Remember the dancer with the peg-leg?_"

Bowser's grin split his face, "Who could ever forget her?! I mean, I thought you were crazy when you brought a manly chick with a wooden leg but wow...Wow. Who knew you could do so much with a pegleg?!"

"_And her eyepatch._"

Bowser laughed, slamming his fists against the desk with rancorous glee, "She was awesome! Beatrice will always hold a spot near my heart..."

"_What happens at bachelor parties_," the boo smirked.

"Stays at bachelor parties!" Bowser roared happily.

"_Now that we've got that hellish grin back on your face_," the ghost preened, "_let us return to business. Yes, back in my past life I was quite the poet._"

"You knew Shyguysphere right?"

King Boo growled, eyes suddenly glowing red, "_I did. He was a terribly overrated ninny. Did anyone like MacKoopa?! A midKoopa's night dream?! Quite frankly I snored through the entire performance, bought another ticket for a second show so I snore right through that one too!_"

"You hate that guy. Jealous maybe?" Bowser smirked.

"_Me? Jealous of that talentless nitwit?_!" King Boo gasped angrily, "_Fornicate that awful heathen!_"

"'Fornicate?'" Bowser almost laughed, "We really need to update your speech from the twentieth century. If you're gonna insult the man then do it right. Don't use any of that froo-froo poetic crap. When in doubt, call his mother out."

"_Shyguysphere's mother is a lascivious harlot._"

This time Bowser barked out a laugh, "Oh Stars that sucked. It was a tad bit better I guess..."

"_I will haunt his descendants for centuries to come_," as he spoke, the Boo's eyes glowed a brighter and more spooky shade of red, "_I will make their mornings mournings, their afternoons asinine and the nights—!_"

"Ichabod," Bowser snapped his fingers to grab the ghost's attention, "I don't care. I just want to impress the princess."

"_You shall serenade her and it will be a beautiful ballet!_" King Boo cheered, "_Doeth her voice give my heart flight with the purest of whitest wings? Feathers light and airy with wonder and devotion? And what of her smile? A beauty that melts all fear and paints my heart aglow with a myriad of colors."_

"Yes!" Bowser nodded his head, "That's the kind of crap I need to say!"

King Boo smirked, "_Well then, we must cultivate the wonders you feel for her. What do you like about her_?"

"She's funny, hot, smart, brave, has killer legs, great smile, infectious laugh, she loves my kids, open-minded, did I mention she's beautiful?"

_"Twice. So you like her smile? Then say it."_

"I like your smile?" Bowser sounded unsure for a change.

"_Harken her beauty to that of the moon_!" King Boo closed his eyes as he purred, "_The glow of your smile shames the moon into a bitter, venomous envy._**"**

"T-That's great! Can you say that again? I didn't copy it down. The glow of something and the moon...uh? Shined or something."

"_And if she's smart, she'll know those words aren't authentically yours. You must use your own words to woo her otherwise it is all for naught._"

"But that crap was great! It was romantic and...mushy._ I'v_e never done mushy for a woman ever."

"_You are a Koopa who has had women fighting each other for your affections_," King Boo grinned, "_Pray tell what do you tell women when you court them_?"

Bowser laughed, "It's usually pretty vulgar...Daisy would probably punch my lights out if I said half that stuff to her."

The Koopa king laughed to himself, picturing the image of a flustered, furious Daisy. And when she's mad she actually hits pretty hard. Not strong enough to hurt a bad-tempered sexbomb like myself, but very hard for a pretty little thing.

"_I see. Well, any of her features you like?_"

"Everything, she's perfect: eyes, hair, hips, rack, ass, everything."

"_Your complete visage astounds me. My eyes thirst to see the red of your hair, the sparkle of your eyes and the womanly curve of your wondrous figure._"

Bowser started to jot down notes on his palm. The boo narrowed his eyes, "_Now say the same thing and this time do not sound like a desperate pervert."_

"I-I am not desperate!"

The boo grinned lopsidedly, "_Ah and yet you do not deny being perverted._"

Bowser snapped his jaw shut as the boo laughed, "That's cause you tricked me!"

"_Now then, let your inner poet out king!_" The boo cackled, "_Let it out so you can haunt the wooooorld!_"

"Your hair..." Bowser scratched at his head, "is like fire?"

"_Good_!" The boo looked hopeful, "_continue..._"

"Your smile...is sparkly?"

"_What sparkles? Use a glorious metaphor to compare her to._"

"Your smile is sparkly like diamonds?"

"_Good! Carry on! Hmm...perhaps this is not song material yet, but a note from a secret admirer is always charming. So here is what you shall do! First you'll—_"

* * *

><p>I yawned, ready to turn in for the night. A sheet of paper was shoved under my door. I picked up the note and studied it. It read:<p>

_I'm stuck because every time I see you, I don't know how expression myself. The red blaze of your hair is as fierce and as bold as my affections for you. Like the sun hitting a jewel, your smile sparkles like thousands of diamonds._

_Every time I hear your voice and experience your laughter my heart glows. Maybe one day you'll see through me and notice your admirer._

A...A love note. For me? My cheeks grew warm as I closed the note. I was stunned, maybe even a bit giddy as a rush of zeal coursed through my veins. I'd never throw this away.

"Grammy, c-come and look at this."

"Oh my! You're blushing _Pichi, _what is it?"

* * *

><p>Some way down the hall, Bowser peered from around the corner. He drank in Flower's reaction as she read the note. First she was surprised then a pretty pink blush colored her cheeks. A dazed, dreamy expression stole her face as she slipped back into her bedroom. Vaguely he could hear her talking to Grammy.<p>

Under the electricity her hair really did glow like fire.

He smirked.

_Mission accomplished you friggin' sexy studmuffin king._

* * *

><p>AliceStar: Hehe! Read and review! ;3<p> 


	22. Kingdom Tour: Land's End

Alice: Hey! Everyone. (Ike voice) Prepare yourself…For a long chapter. X)

Ultrra: Yeah. It is long.

Alice: So you know the rule Ultrra.

Ultrra: Short A/N note...?

Alice: Bingo.

Ultrra: BOOM.

Alice: XP

Ultrra: Okay. Here's all I got to say: I need to party with King Boo, Moonstone Kingdom seems great but I _hate _cold weather and I _need _Koopatube in my life. XD I want to see Bowser's fails. You know they'd be hilarious.

Alice: XD OMG. Anyways a bit of a warning: A bit more language than normal and a little bit of drinking. That should be it. Enjoy! I had a ton of fun with this chapter! ^_^

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>The following morning we said our goodbyes to the gregarious Queen Titania and the beautiful ice kingdom. It turns out Land's End was a rural territory and had no true roads into and out the province. So the jet landed in the nearest settlement, a suspicious cubbyhole called Monstro Town. We were safe since everyone seemed to know and like Bowser.<p>

The rest of the journey we traversed by foot. Wolfe promised it wouldn't be long, half an hour tops. As we traveled, I realized Grammy wasn't by my side. She held a camera, focusing the lens on a fluffy, cute squirrel.

"That's a cool camera."

"It is isn't it? It was a tad bit too chilly to use in Moonstone."

"Is it antique?"

"Most certainly is. This baby was made the same year I was born. Of course I've had to have it updated a bit to keep up with the times. Its memory is...a bit spotty. It breaks a bit more over time but what can you do? It's old and falling apart. Damaged but not broken."

"It functions," I hummed.

"It sure does. Now hold your pose Mr. Squirrel. One, two, three, say cheese!"

The moment our trek entered Land End's perimeter, the temperate weather grew sweltering and muggy, with only Wolfe and Puppo used to the unreasonable climate. Silver looked flushed, swaying as if he'd pass out. I guess a prince of ice and snow would be intolerant to this weather.

My smooth, soft hair was toast in this humidity and blossomed into a thick mass of curls. I checked on Grammy who appeared happy despite the asinine climate, "Me? Oh I'm fine _Pichi_. I always liked warm weather. Heats the bones nicely and makes my muscles limber! This feels like a summer at Delfino."

The Land's End territory was a natural reservoir bursting with miles of wildlife, vegetation and an expanse of land trailing further than the eye could see. Wolfe was amped, excited and glowing with pride as we headed towards his home.

It was muggy and miserable; the sun scorched like the Desert but the sweltering mugginess reminded me of a swamp. The expensive chiffon of my gown plastered uncomfortably against my back with sticky sweat. I was beginning to think this march of death would go on forever until Wolfe boomed, "We're here!"

Luigi, sweaty, tired and worn sighed, "Here? Where's-a here? It's nothing but grass for miles!"

"We're right on top of it!" Excited, Wolfe was even bouncing on the tips of his toes, "It's hidden behind these last layers of beanstalks and corn but it's here. Welcome to my home!" He chirruped, "the Northern boundary of Land's End!"

He pulled back a towering beanstalk and beyond was a bustlingly village. Hundreds of people traveled to and fro on plain dirt-road paths going about their day. It seemed like a tight-knit rural village filled with green pastures, farms, and small mom-and-pop stores.

Farmers and Chow alike watched over livestock as store owners turned their 'closed' signs to a welcoming 'open!' There was loud haggling and bargaining going on at vendor stands as fresh produce glinted in the morning sun.

Like Wolfe the people of Land's End were homogenous with rich russet skin, long jet hair, sharp amber eyes and clothing made of animal hide. There were so many Chow! Chows of all colors and sizes walked along, going about the flow of traffic.

Some towed wagons, others ridden like steeds and some walked alongside of their wards. Some of the Chows were huge, as big as horses even. I wonder if Puppo would ever get that big. Wolfe threw his head back and howled passionately.

The bustling crowd slowed to a halt, the heads of humans and Chow alike turned our way. Then they howled back a greeting before flooding around. As people from the village crowded around Wolfe, boys dogpiled onto him, giving noogies and sneaking in treacherous wetwillies. Wolfe laughed, taking the punishment with good humor.

"Wolfe! Welcome back you rat bastard!"

"We shoulda migrated and left his ass."

"Nah we need him! His soft skin makes a great punching bag."

"Hey, he brought some friends."

The attention shifted as multiple sets of golden eyes were on us. Eight different people were suddenly in my face, peering at me with the same, curious amber eyes. One kid even sniffed me.

Someone pointed, "Hey, who is this girl?"

A man squinted at me, "Where do you come from?"

"I'm from Sarasaland."

"Oh! A Desert girl huh?"

"Do all you Desert girls have that cherry-red hair?"

"Her eyes are so blue!"

"Her hair is curly! I wanna touch it!"

The kid who sniffed me spoke, a thumb in his mouth, "You smell like apples, I really like apples."

"Damn, now I'm hungry, look what you did squirt!"

"Sorry bro!"

"Now I gotta eat and I'm gonna eat your _braaaaaains_."

I peered at my other suitors who were getting just as much attention. A child tried on Luigi's famous hat as his mustache was fingered, others admired Ryu's sleek silver arm gauntlets. Hands-down the largest group was around Bowser as the Canine people groped and touched. He looked furious, reeling back as the people continued to touch him.

"He's huge!"

"I wanna touch his horns!"

"Look! Touch his tail!"

"I touched his claws!"

"Must...not..._bite_..." Bowser growled through his teeth.

"I think you better call them off of King Bowser," I laughed, "see his mouth turning red? That means he's about to blow fire."

_"Alright!"_ A loud voice boomed like thunder, "step aside and quit molesting the guests."

The citizens fell back, moving aside to make a path. The next person to approach was a woman with a bold, confident strut that could rival Bowser's arrogant promenade. She was tall, six foot easy and crowned with long, wild locks of shaggy ebony hair that swept past her knees. Tall, curvy and built like a thoroughbred, she could be an Amazon.

Even when she placed her hands on her hips, it looked like she was flexing; I need to get on her workout plan stat. Her sharp gaze rested on Wolfe. She jerked her head towards us as if to say, 'Who're they? Explain.' Wolfe padded over, placing an arm around my shoulder as we approached, "Mom, this is the Princess Daisy of Sarasaland."

"Princess this is my mom, the alpha of the Northern Canine Clan, Chieftain Kitsune."

I bowed in the proper Sarasalandian way, "_Ahula._ I am Princess Sarasaland and am enchanted to meet you."

"Oh?" She raised an eyebrow, appraising my form with interest, "So you're the Desert girl Wolfebane's been crazy about huh?"

"Yes, I'm Princess Daisy of the Sarasaland kin—"

I blinked, startled when she leaned forward and sniffed. Wolfe stood back, amusement dancing in his eyes as he watched our interaction. Taurus and Zero furrowed their brows in confusion; for once we agree on something: what was she doing?

"Hmm," her eyes narrowed in thought, "You smell like someone I know..."

I peered away, "Um...?"

Like what do you say to that? Honestly, how do you reply to a statement like that?

"Who are your folks?" she asked.

Where Silver's mother was imbued with fine manners and etiquette, Kitsune was aggressive, blunt and straight to the point. I don't think she'd be impressed with the finer points of monarchical decorum.

"My father is Emperor Sakuro and—"

Her golden eyes glowed as she exploded with laughter, "Sakuro is your old man? You look nothing like him so I guess he settled down with that redhead eh?"

I grinned, "The late Empress Rose? Yeah she was my mom!"

Her laughter boomed, "So he did marry her! Good for him, he about chased her halfway across the globe!"

I raised an eyebrow; she knew my mom? She knew romantic tales about my parents? Father had pursued my mother with such passion?

Wait a minute; Father had once been romantic?!

Her smile softened as she peered at Grammy, "And again we meet my illustrious Empress. Time finds you well."

"It's been too long hasn't it?" Grammy laughed, pulling the tall woman in for a hug.

"It has. Last time I saw you your hair was as dark as a raven's feather. I never recalled a woman having such pretty dark hair. It looked like Magikoopa ink."

"Those are years long past," Grammy laughed, "I kind of like having white hair now; I can go to sleep everywhere I want and not be disturbed, I can say whatever I want without reprimand and best yet I can force anyone to open and hold doors."

"And if they don't just punch 'em hard until they do. That always worked for me, nowadays people leap to open doors when I walk by," the chief laughed.

Bowser looked away, hiding a smirk; of course he'd like violence. Kitsune turned her attention back to me, stern countenance muted, "Well that's just great. You come from good stock: a stuck-up perfectionist and a psycho. And then of course there's your mom."

Grammy laughed; I'm sure I missed a joke somewhere. The chieftain slapped an arm around my shoulder, grinning largely. Just like Wolfe she had sharp teeth and a wild smile, "You ready to see how much more awesome our lives are than yours?"

I laughed, already feeling at ease, "Please show me!"

She squeezed my shoulder one last time before moving back. She motioned to a big Chow standing to her side.

"This is my guardian Sage."

Even sitting on his haunches Sage towered over me; he was probably the size of a steed. He had midnight-blue fur and stood at attention with all the diligence of a sentinel. Our stares locked and I found myself being appraised by the Chow.

Yes appraised; I got the vibe Sage was consciously trying to feel me out. His tail stopped wagging as his glinting golden eyes analyzed and dissected. Chows were far more intelligent and sentient than I gave credit for. We locked eyes and Sage nodded his head in what I can assume was a greeting.

"Welcome to our village," Kitsune threw her arms out proudly, "We're the Northern Canine clan and Land's End has been our home for generations."

She led us through the village as a curious cloud of Canine citizens and Chow alike followed.

"Everything you see has been built and manicured by our own people. We're a close knit community, a place where we all know each other, our neighbors and work together as a village."

"Land's End was originally thought of as inhospitable," Zero spoke, "the vicious wildlife, unbearable summer seasons, flooding rivers, mosquitoes carrying myriads of diseases. How is your civilization able to endure?"

Kitsune laughed, "Because this is our home. We don't complain about the bad, we only realize the good; it is possible to survive out here and there are plenty of wonderful things: herbs for teas, trees shedding fruit all year along and plenty of game to hunt in the wild."

"We've learned how to survive here because it's the only place we've ever lived. It's eat or be eaten and I think we're eating well."

"So-a," Luigi asked, "What are the deal with-a those Chows?"

"Our survival in Land's End depends on a symbiotic relationship with the Chow."

As we walked past a village market, a dark figure caught my eye. On a doorstep was a Chow with charcoal-black fur resting on its stomach. Even laying on its belly I could tell it was huge, bigger than all the other Chow I've seen. It must have sensed my stare as its eyes snapped open. Feral golden slits narrowed as a thick growl rumbled from the Chow. One moment I was locked in a dangerous gaze and the next it was back to resting, eyes closed.

Wolfe must have noticed the interaction, "Aw don't worry about him."

"Why not?" I laughed, "A gigantic wolf gave me the equivalent of a death-stare. We both know he can kick my ass."

Wolfe laughed, "That's just how Headbanger is. In fact I think a snarl is his equivalent of a smile. If he hated you, you'd know it! He'd be chasing you up and down these streets."

"Who does he belong to?"

"No one."

"But I thought Chief Kitsune said...?"

"Right, each Chow will receive a ward, _except_ him. He's the most antisocial, ruthless Chow bar none. He barely even lets anyone within arm's length._ Pfft_! _Hell no_ he's not going to be someone's guardian. It'd take a Star damn monster to even ride him."

I peered at the slumbering Chow one last time as he faded from sight. We walked past a building where litters of energetic, yipping puppies played in an open pasture. The majority of the curious puppies rushed towards our approach, barking, yipping and hopping with excitement. Kitsune picked up the nearest Chow puppy, which wiggled and chirruped. She grinned; pulling away as the puppy tried its best to lick her face. Ooh it was so cute! I reached forward, patting the excited pup. I laughed as it began to lick my hands vigorously. Grammy joined in, rubbing the puppy behind its ears, "Oh they're so darling!"

"As I told you, Chow and Canines work together as a unit. Once a Canine becomes thirteen, they receive a puppy who will be their guardian for life."

Ryu reached his hand in, watching as the puppies piled in, licking and nibbling his digits, "So each Canine is given a Chow of their choice?"

"Your Chow chooses you. I remember the day I got Sage," she beamed, peering at the blue wolf beside her, "even as a puppy he came up to me, staring with that same intense stare he has. He knew I was a badass even back then."

"So the Chow senses something about you he or she likes?" I smiled.

"Right," Kitsune nodded her head, "He sensed my strong will and heard my voice from halfway across town. A big voice and a strong will makes a good leader."

Silver peered at Wolfe, "So why did...Puppo choose you?"

"Because he liked my laugh and I smelt like dirt and cookies. And the pupster loves cookies!" Wolfe tickled the Chow on his shoulder.

"So basically he chose you 'cause you're a fatass," Bowser supplied, "He knows the fatass will always supply his cookies. Smart doggie."

Wolfe's eye twitched as anyone within earshot laughed, "He likes me. The END king jerko!"

"Sure," Bowser chuckled, rolling his eyes, "Don't get your panties in a twist."

Wolfe continued to bore a stare into Bowser's back as Kitsune continued, "These cute little guys are great guardians. Even as pups their senses are keen, they can smell blood on ticks." Kitsune smiled and scratched the puppy under the chin. The baby Chow howled before kicking uncontrollably. I laughed.

"Now over here is where we farm. Follow after me and I might let you ride a Chow..."

Someone nudged my shoulder. I looked over and Wolfe appeared, "Hey."

His smiles were really infectious. I found myself grinning back, "Hey there. What's up?"

"I was just thinking," he grinned, "either we can stay here and listen to mom talk about nothing interesting. Or we can duck out for a second and see an amazing view."

I laughed, "She won't be mad?"

"Oh no," he smirked, "We'll be quick and no one will notice. Come this way..."

We cut through thick foliage and it was humid, sticky and I was miserable. We walked through tall grass and my gown was nowhere near suitable for these engagements. I nearly hiked up my skirts to my knees as we went. This was a screwy equation: Walking on uneven soil plus pumps equals cursing and nearly twisting my ankle.

I wiped disgustingly viscous, syrupy sweat from my brow as I followed after Wolfe, "Are we almost there? My feet are starting to—_whoa!_"

In one fluid motion he spun around and picked me up. His smooth gait was unhindered as he carried me. Wolfe laughed, strong enough to secure my weight with a single arm as he rubbed the back of his head with the other, "Sorry, I can be such a dumbass sometimes. I'm not gonna let you walk through the wilderness in a poofy dress and shoes that make you walk funny."

I blushed, "Heels m-make me walk funny?! It's supposed to be smooth and feminine!"

He grinned, "A girly walk? I dunno but you walk really weird. Stick to shoes you walk nicely in, like the ones you wear playing sports."

Even Wolfe, who was not at all acquainted with the dialogue of feminine etiquette, recognized how badly I fumbled in heels.

Damn, another woman fail for me.

"Gee thanks," I huffed.

He laughed, "Hey! I like your natural walk! It's confident and sure. In those pointy shoes you wobble like a Chow pup."

"What do you think of my outfit and makeup?"

He hummed, "It's kinda too much. Again you look best in sports clothes."

So he wasn't impressed with the glitter and glamour of royalty. I was best as is; a pair of shorts, sneakers and a tanktop.

"Thanks Wolfe," I smiled.

He winked and as the journey continued Wolfe hummed a soft melody under his breath. It wasn't much longer when he shoved a beanstalk out of the way and smiled, "We're here!"

"Where's 'here'?"

"This is the Wild Canyon," Wolfe spoke, "It's the largest canyon south of the Darkland borders. Kinda cool it took millions of years to make this huh?"

It was beautiful, a demonstration of where time had carved away stone and rock into a breath-taking expanse. The gorgeous coral-pink winding slopes and smooth, roiling curve of rock were a product of nature's very own earthly, patient artisanship.

"It's so beautiful. I feel so small. Do you come here daily?"

"Every now and then," he hummed.

As I took in the soft oranges, pinks and deep siennas of the smooth sediment layers, Wolfe laughed softly.

I looked at him, "What is it?"

"Oh its nothing," and yet still he laughed.

"It's something! Now spill!" I nudged his shoulder.

"Well," he rubbed his chin in thought, stalling intentionally, "Weeeeeeeeeeell..."

I poked his side, "Say it! Say it!"

I must have hit the sweet spot as he broke out into squabbles of laughter. I was relentless in my assault as he laughed loudly, "Okay! Okay! Just stop tickle-attacking meeeee!"

I relinquished and he caught his breath in between spurts of laughter, " So Wild Canyon is more fondly known as spit canyon."

"'Spit canyon'?" I asked, "Where does that name come from?"

Wolfe laughed, " 'Cause you hock one back and fire off!"

I stared at him incredulously and his cheeks bloomed with color. He rubbed the back of his head, "N-Not saying I do that or anything...Uh...Of course if you're not into that kind of thing..."

I laughed, "No! I'm totally into it! I wanna spit in the canyon!"

Surprise morphed into elation as a stellar grin split his face, "Really?! Then let's do it!"

"Okay!" I laughed harder, his infectious mirth spreading.

A devilish smile crossed his lips, incisors bared, "Alright then! Now you wanna reel back and really hock it up and get some good leverage."

I grinned, "Leverage?"

"Leverage," he smirked. Then he bowed mockingly, "If you will observe, milady."

I curtsied coquettishly, giggling like an airhead, "Of course milord!"

He laughed, "Okay. Here goes."

Wolfe snorted, making a loud, disgusting snort as he reared back then snapped forward like a rubber band, launching the spittle with admirable distance. I exploded with laughter, "Nice shot!"

He grinned, buffing his nails, "Been a pro at it since I was five. Now your turn."

I threw my head back and spat, pretty pathetically compared to him. Wolfe's laughter boomed, "Not bad, but you gotta _really _hack it up. Get some good snot in there and let it fly!"

"That's _so _gross!" I laughed, "Okay I'm down!"

"Observe my technique madam," he even mockingly lifted his pinkie, "Gather a gunk of snot and let 'er rip!"

I laughed as Wolfe made an even nastier, more gnarly snort then spat. Grinning, he looked my way expectantly. I did as instructed and fired away. It wasn't nearly as far or glorious but I was getting better. It's not like they taught this in etiquette class...

"Better," he grinned, "Now, remember, get some good snortage and _reeeeeally_ hock it up and then—"

He fired. I hocked back and with a loud _pa-tooie, _I spat. Oh yeeeah that one flew! I bombed this one! It flew with the glory of a newborn' first flight.

"So, _this _is what you are up to?"

I snapped around, cheeks burning in mortification as Bowser approached with a large smirk. Oh Stars I hope he didn't see that. But his snarky grin made me believe otherwise.

"It was so cute how you puckered and attempted such a thing," Bowser was guffawing as my face burned red.

Oh fuuuuu—

"Hey King B!" Wolfe chirped.

"King Bowser?" I whispered, "H-How much of that did you see?"

Bowser's growing grin said it all. I blushed to the roots of my hair; oh Stars, I can't believe he saw that.

"We saw...Too much," Zero deadpanned, face scrunched up in disgust.

Taurus looked completely revolted as Luigi eyed the canyon with interest. I caught eyes with Silver who was grinning. He cleared his throat pointedly and tapped his cheek. He was telling me I had something on my fa—?

Oh _sheyt_. Oh _sheyt sheyt_.

Blushing, I wiped spray spittle from my chin. Silver laughed softly.

Damnit!

Well, there goes my image as a cute, dainty princess. So loooong self-dignity!

"...Can I give it a try-a?" Luigi asked hopefully.

Taurus sneered, shaking his head, "This is quite revolting. I'll have no part in it."

Wolfe's grin grew, "Hell yes you can! Come on over Weegeeman and launch one!"

"We used to-a do this in school!" Luigi sighed nostalgically, "Ah childhood-a..."

Ryu laughed as Lulu shot a disgusting snot rocket.

"This is the vilest thing I've seen," Taurus sneered.

"Wanna give it a go Shinobi?" Wolfe laughed, "The canyon awaits."

Ryu shook his head, still laughing, "No thanks, I'll pass."

I blushed; there's no way I'll do anymore spitting with _him _watching. Bowser stepped forward and spoke in an oddly sagacious tone, "Dogboy, your loogie fundamentals are present though there are several things you can work on to improve distance and speed. Greenstache, that was pathetic and princess, it was _cute _you even attempted such a thing."

Ryu looked in my direction with an amused half-grin, "You spat princess?"

The curve of his sly grin had me terribly embarrassed. I laughed wildly, blushing nearly as red as my hair, "Well...m-maybe I did _once_..."

Wolfe arched an eyebrow at Bowser's criticism, "Oh? And who are you? _The _Sire master snotball!?"

"That's Sire _Grandmaster _snotball, you disrespectful buttmunch."

"Well," Wolfe huffed indignantly, hands on his hips, "You can't just call us out and not do anything."

"Put up or shut-a up," Luigi cosigned.

"Very well then. Take note of my skill, precision and speed you backwater underlings!"

Bowser guffawed darkly, sharking up the nastiest, most animalistic noise I've ever heard. He sounded revolting, like a possessed blender. It was so gross, so completely over the top I burst out laughing as Silver's complexion leeched a faint green.

Wolfe, Luigi and Ryu looked awed as Taurus and Zero gaped wordlessly. Then Bowser shot a huge, flaming ball of dripping snot. It exploded from his maw like a cannon, doubling and maybe even tripling the distance of any other loogie. Jaws dropped and eyes bulged; that thing flew like a laser! Oh that's _so gross_!

I doubled over, laughing. Smirking, Bowser stood proudly, arms akimbo as he watched the...mucus fly.

"Mama mia..." Luigi gaped, taking off his hat with reverence, "It's-a thing of beauty..."

Did he wipe a tear from his eye like _that_ was something beautiful?! The Koopa shot a _flaming snotball_ for Stars sake! He didn't write a beautiful ballet, read a masterful poem or anything worthy of tears! I see the values we hold near our heart differ between men and women...

Luigi even began to hum Italy's national anthem with a sense of pride. Then Bowser joined in the tune; _Oh Stars this is ridiculous._

"That was absolutely disgusting!" I laughed.

"His loogies are _flaming_," Wolfe whispered in awe, "I tip my hat to you sire. If I was a girl, I'd want to have your children..."

Bowser chortled, "Wonder if that applies to any girls I know."

He shot a sly glance my direction. I stopped staring after his monster loogie, "Oh hell no. Not after that monstrosity! I'm half impressed and super disgusted at the same time!"

He grinned, "Nothing says love more than a kiss after a snot missile! Now then, kiss me princess."

I laughed, backing away, "Oh yuck! You can forget it! All of you!"

"Let's swap saliva," Bowser was all out laughing, "You can even have some snot if you want!"

"Gross!" I laughed.

He held his arms out for an embrace as we both laughed like idiots.

"Hmm..." Zero purred.

"What the hell is going on over here?!"

Uh oh. Methinks we're busteeeeed!

"I take my eyes off you cubs for a moment and this is what happens!?"

Wolfe's mom appeared, looking none too happy with our silliness. She jammed her hands on her hips, heated eyes boring lasers.

"He-a started it!" Luigi pointed at Wolfe.

"No one likes a tattletale Green pipe-licker!"

Yes that was Bowser.

"I'm disappointed. In all of you," she growled, shaking her head.

The matronly authority in her voice had us looking a bit sheepish. This probably looked terrible; a supposedly dignified princess spitting like a sailor.

"That was the saddest display...of spitting I've had the displeasure to witness."

My head snapped up in surprise; wait what? Grammy laughed, "You really had them shaking, Kitty."

She was smirking, golden eyes bright, "It's true although, I was impressed with King Bowser. That thing had a motor on it."

"So...we're not in trouble?" I blinked.

"No," Kitsune smirked, shaking her head, "But you will be if you cubs don't get a move on. We're going to hit the training grounds next, follow Sage and git."

Everyone turned and followed Sage. Something out of the corner of my eye caught my attention. Kitsune roped Wolfe by the back of his shirt, pulling him away from our group. Wolfe yelped as he was wrenched backwards. They fell into what looked like a huddle; foreheads together as the chieftain spoke in a 'whisper'. Too bad her whisper was the average person's regular speaking volume.

"Didn't I teach you anything about women?! The hell's wrong with you boy? I oughta box your ears."

"But I did everything you said!" He whined.

"Ya take 'em to the canyon and launch far! _Far_! I saw your spit and boy did it suck Thwomp balls! It sucked more than a two dollar birdo prostitute. And that's _a lot_ of sucking."

At that I gagged back a laugh. If I wanted to remain unnoticed I couldn't laugh. I breathed through my nose and fought against the strain of held-back laughter.

"I-It was okay! She liked it!"

Kitsune growled, "You reel back, and then..."

I can only assume she spat and scarily enough it sounded like someone fired a gun.

* * *

><p>"Here's the training grounds where we practice hunting drills, target practice, you name it."<p>

We were brought to an expanse of open emerald-green meadow. The training grounds were huge and parts of them were in use. Some men and women were lounging and sharing mindless conversation while others practiced their aim, using slings, bows and arrows. To the far right were people riding Chows through obstacle courses and to the far left was a person training a pack of Chow puppies.

This was so fascinating!

"I want to cut someone!"

"You got any gnarly weapons a badass king can use?"

_Sigh._ Unsurprisingly the boys were _only _interested in the weapon use.

"How does your clan hunt?" Zero asked studying a sword with a thick blade.

"The surrounding wildlife is our main game," Kitsune replied, "We hunt, clean, and gut all kills. The left overs are dried and stored for winter. Cheep-cheep and blooper fishing are important elements in our diet. The rivers here are flooding with them. Then of course we have plenty of bean and corn stalks around. You cubs will eat good tonight for sure."

Sage sat beside Kitsune, golden eyes glowing with a calm strength. She rustled the fur on her Chow's head before she spoke.

"And as you can see, our clan is skilled with a myriad of weapons. We have to be; we do hunt our dinners after all. None of that television dinner crap here."

"Isn't she wonderful?" Grammy whispered to me.

I laughed; Wolfe's mom was abrasive, direct and blunt. I liked her, "She's pretty cool."

Grammy fanned herself, "Stars it's kinda muggy out here isn't it? It was bearable an hour ago."

Kitsune hummed, "Sage. Run and get the queen some fresh spring water."

Sage shot out of there in a blue blur. Within three winks he was gone from sight. Whew that was a fast doggie!

"My clan hunts as well," Ryu spoke, "Perhaps not as extensively as the Canine…"

"A Shinobi eh? I wondered about those fancy clothes. Right. We feed our own here. And on another note as much as I love to brag," she slapped an arm around Wolfe and gave him a noogie, "My cub is one helluva hunter."

Wolfe blushed, rubbing the back of his head bashfully, "Aw _mom..._"

My eyes glowed, "I want to see you use a weapon! What can you use?"

He listed items off by finger, "Arrows, clubs, knives, spears..."

I grinned, "Then show me."

"You heard the girl, show her what ya got, boy."

Smirking, Kitsune jerked her head towards the targets and Wolfe soon followed. He chose the nearest weapon, a ball and chain. His careless weapon selection made me think he was a master with all of them. The crowd of Canine onlookers quadrupled within minutes. They hovered nearby, watching with interest. Wolfe stood, legs spread apart and eyes stern with concentration. The fellow tribesmen released encouraging whoops and cheers, "Smash it lonewolf!"

"Break it wolfman!"

"Let it fly!" I chirruped.

"Go! Go! Go!" Lulu cheered.

Wolfe grinned wickedly, golden eyes ablaze as he spun the chain overhead until it roared like a propeller. With a whoop he let it fly with a snap of his wrist. The ball sailed, hitting the dead center of the target and splintering the wood into an explosion.

The Canines cheered, yipping and whooping as the Chows howled. Wolfe faced us, glowing with a luminous smile as he pumped his fist. Kitsune nodded her head approvingly, "Half a mark to the right...but good."

Kitsune preened, shooting a sly grin Bowser's way, "So what do you think? Badass stuff huh?"

"Not bad," Bowser half-smirked, nodding in approval.

Luigi stepped forward, "I want to try-a!"

"Sure man," Wolfe chirped good-naturedly, "rock it!"

Wolfe handed the ball and chain to Luigi who...

...Sank to the ground like an anchor. Bowser guffawed loudly as Luigi struggled, failing to even lift the ball off the ground. Wolfe watched unsurely, rubbing the back of his neck. A couple of snickers flitted from the nearby Canines, heck even the Chows laughed. Kitsune smirked, amusement flickering in her golden eyes.

"I-Its heavy-a!" Luigi exclaimed, "Mama Mia! It weighs more-a than Aunt Giada's wig-a!"

"Oh it can't be that heavy," I walked over, "Wolfe was swinging it overhead like a lasso!"

I wrapped my fingers around the ball and lifted. And found it was ridiculously heavy. I couldn't even get the metal ball off the floor. I grunted, face reddening from strain, "Ugh! This thing is...heavy!"

"See," Luigi looked smug, "I told you so-a."

Intrigued, the other suitors flocked over. Silver, Taurus, Zero each tried their hand unsuccessfully. Silver backed away, wiping sweat from his hairline.

"I-It is heavy," Silver panted, face flushed from exertion, "I-Is Wolfe that strong or are we just um...lacking?"

"He's brutishly strong," Taurus deadpanned, making sure to properly fix his mussed suit back into place.

Ryu, who had been content to watch previously, looked interested.

"Now I'm curious," he hummed.

He strolled over and wrapped his digits around the ball. He was the only one to lift the iron ball but didn't attempt any swinging. He nodded at Wolfe, "You're pretty strong."

"Aww! Thanks Ry!"

Bowser watched all failed efforts with a satisfied sparkle. I nudged him, "We all know you're dying to upstage them all. Quit acting like you're not."

Bowser feigned surprise, "_Me?_ Upstage _them?_! That's quite a ghastly thing to suggest princess!"

I laughed, "You're so silly!"

Of course when you stroked his ego, Bowser only became an even bigger handful. His 'gentlemanly' accent was downright ridiculous, "Silly? Why I'm not absurd! I do fancy a turn though. I'm just going to go, sip a spot o' tea and..."

"And what?" I asked, still grinning.

One-handed, he lifted the ball and swung it over his head like a lasso. It rotated so fast the grass underfoot fluttered like tiny green wings. He swung the ball and chain like a nunchuck, showing off dexterity as he adroitly switched between hands. He was laughing, wicked grin present as his eyes blazed hellishly, "_Kick all their sorry asses_!"

With a roar he snapped the ball and it exploded into motion, ripping through the target and barreling through several trees. I gaped. Stars, he can double over as a lumberjack!

My Stars what strength!

The training field was silent as Bowser glowed in the aftermath of his badass throw. One final tree collapsed in a puff of thick leaves and scattering critters. Then there was a deafening flood of cheer. The canines ran over, cheering and congratulating him as their Chows barked.

"Wow..." Silver whispered.

"What a throw!"

"Did you see that?! The ball went through ten trees! _Ten?!_"

"Not even Kitsune throws like that and she's a damn savage!"

"What a throw!" Grammy beamed.

He received pats on the back and ribbing from the onlookers. Bowser smirked, absorbing the praise like a sponge.

"Dude!" Wolfe laughed, "That was awesome!"

"He should throw-a well! Bowser has-a thrown chain chomps, Goombas, Koopas, Parakoopas, Thwmops, Bob-ombs..." Luigi listed off.

"Now that was some good shit King," Kitsune slapped his shell, "I can't recall seeing a throw like that!"

"...Koopa shells, trees-a, boulders, fire balls," Luigi ran out of fingers, "cannons, blocks...at Mario and I."

"That was exceptional!" Grammy winked, patting the king's plastron, "But we shouldn't expect any less from the great King Bowser eh?"

I was about to give my congratulations when a couple of Canine girls darted forward.

"That was amazing!" A girl smiled, showing off sharp incisors.

"Hmm," a girl with wild, shoulder-length hair rubbed a finger on his plastron, "Wonder what else he could do with such strength?"

"Something requiring a lot of stamina to go all night I bet."

The girls cackled wickedly and recognizing the flirtatious atmosphere, Bowser grinned, arching an interested eyebrow. Kitsune appeared, smirking, "In our culture strength is a very attractive trait. A big, strong beast of a man gives the benefits of larger hunter portions, provides better living accommodations and stronger, healthier offspring. Wolfesbane is a top hunter and you'd be well taken care of. And apparently the king would make a fine warrior as well."

I arched an eyebrow watching as a pack of Canine girls fluttered around Bowser. He flexed a well-developed bicep, allowing the cluster of girls to touch his arm. There was an utter of words amongst them and suddenly the girls erupted with boisterous laughter. Something tells me whatever was said wasn't family friendly _if ya catch my drift_...

"S-So he's like prime pickings then if strength is really attractive," I spoke.

Kitsune half-grinned, "Very prime."

"So him being a Koopa doesn't matter...?"

She blinked, a bit surprised, "Hmm? Race doesn't matter at all to us. At the same time I'm a dumbass if I pretend to ignore all the obvious differences. 'Yay I don't see race or anything!' Yeah, that could even be a bit more presumptuous. I clearly see we're different and I clearly see him for what he is: a big-ass Koopa with spikes, horns and muscles for days. Just because I notice what he is doesn't mean I have to treat him any differently."

"We do in Sarasaland," I whispered, shame coloring my voice, "I mean it doesn't bother me, Grammy and Father but my citizens..."

She must have heard me, "That's just some stupid crap you highlanders care about: etiquette, class, prestige all the really shallow, unimportant things. Frankly I never understood it."

She turned to me and grinned, "But I get the vibe you're different."

"I never understood why it has to be that way," I spoke softly.

Kitsune shrugged, "I don't either Girly. But I know one thing."

I looked up, "What is it?"

She grinned, "Our girls certainly like King Bowser."

_What?_

The chieftain squeezed my shoulder before joining a conversation with Wolfe and Luigi. I stared blankly, watching the shameless flirting continue; what the hell was this?! Was he just going to let them fawn all over him?! I huffed, snapping my head away. What a super flirt, I guess anything in a skirt wins his attent—

"So...was I hot? Or was I uber sexy? If you feel the need to swoon...I won't judge you."

It was him. My nostrils flared, "Gee I dunno, why don't you ask one of those girls back there?!"

An easy grin spread over his face, "Upset?"

"No I'm not!" I snapped, "Why would I be upset over your _stupid_ flirting?!"

"My Stars look at you!" he laughed, "No need to work yourself up my Desert hottie."

My cheeks grew hot at his growl, "I bet that's what you say to them too!"

"They don't even compare to you," Bowser laughed his eyes glowing with mirth, "All angry and worked up over nothing. I feel special! Shit, I'm _orgasmic_ even!"

"Yeah whatever..."

"Aww come on," he purred, "They're cute but nowhere near my type."

Arms crossed, I glared at the floor, "Yeah? Then what's your type?"

He sounded wistful, "Usually a really busty, curvy hot-tempered Koopette. Ohoho nothing like a woman who can manhandle your ass in bed."

I made to leave but he placed a claw on my shoulder. He was laughing; what was so funny, "W-Would you quit laughing?! Nothing's even funny Bowwy!"

"But for the sake of the argument," he sounded nonplussed, "I'll talk about humans. If I had a type, guess it'd be: strong, tan...athletic. And being hot-tempered is a turn on too."

"Sounds like a Canine girl," I muttered under my breath.

"Maybe but you know what blows me away?" He smirked, "My mind shuts down when human girls have dark skin and light eyes. And then if they have curly red hair?! _Oh Stars_...and then if they're completely innocent and super clumsy..."

I blushed, laughing, "...I guess I overacted."

He grinned, "Well damn. If I was a girl I'd be jealous too if someone was hitting on a godly, masculine hunk of Koopa."

"I was _not_ jealous Bowwy!"

"Uh huh," he laughed, "You make envy hot though."

"_I was not jealous_!"

"Don't see why you even needed to be," he sighed, "All of this," he motioned to himself, "Can be yours."

I laughed, "Oh Stars."

His expression darkened, "And did you call me Bowwy again?! That's it. You're gonna pay."

Kitsune returned, walking over in a fit of laughter, "I know exactly what we're going to do next. King you'll love it. We're—"

"Chieftain!"

A Canine warrior came barreling in, the crowd parting for him. He rode a large purple Chow. He pulled to a halt, looking furious, "Kitsune, there's a piranha heard migrating this way!"

"WHAT?!" She roared, eyes blazing like fire, "How far are these bastards!?"

The look-out appeared worried, "Not even hours, ma'am."

She snarled ferociously, sharp incisors bared, "Well shit. This day just got interesting. And annoying."

"Lady Kitsune, what's the matter?" I asked.

"A stampede of ugly, gigantic, fat-ass weeds are drawing too close to the village grounds. If they arrive here it'll be bad news. Ruthless pigs."

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Ryu asked.

"You cubs can stay out of the way and get to safety with the rest of the villagers," Kitsune stuck two fingers into her mouth and a clear, piercing whistle rang. Moments later the shaggy, dark blue hide of Sage appeared.

She swung onto the Chow's back with a practiced ease, eyes stern.

"Aw come on mom!" Wolfe pleaded, "We can help! Ryu's a hot-shot warrior, Luigi's a hero and Bowser. Well I don't even have to explain how badass he is, you saw him throw! Not even Pa throws like that."

"A-And I have training riding horses and b-beasts," Silver of all people spoke up, "I can help too. I've taken gold and silver in the equine events."

"You have a point," she spoke consideringly, "Change of plans: the green guy, Shinobi, snowflake and king will roll with me. The rest of you head to the village."

Wolfe bobbed his head approvingly then scrunched up his face comically as he realized, "Hey! That plan _doesn't_ include me!"

"I...I can help too!" I spoke out.

Kitsune laughed dryly, "This isn't a kiddie field trip. We're going to be dealing with ugly, hostile, aggressive animals and for a change they're _not_ my in-laws."

"Kitsune," the scout looked at her, "we should get back to the village and regroup with the others."

"Let us help," I piped in, "I...I can ride..."

Surprisingly they stopped to listen. Two sets of golden eyes were fixed on me and I was a bit daunted.

"Uh..."

Kitsune waited. They all did. Hell this was kind of awkward; I had nothing.

"Um...I can ride...a sandcycler?"

The looks I received for that comment were hilarious: a raised eyebrow from Ryu, furrowed brows from Wolfe and skeptical glances from Taurus and Zero. Bowser smirked, shaking his head in a 'What a dumbass' sort of way. Right, I totally see how that didn't help my case.

Grammy whispered to me, "It was a...erm...Nice try...?"

Great even she knew it sucked.

"Uh..." I started, "It was the first thing that came to mind..."

Kitsune barked a sarcastic laugh, "Riding a living, breathing Chow with a mind of his own is very different than riding some crotch rocket. I admire your valor Girly but it's a damn stupid idea. I'm not going to have the death of Sakuro's little girl on my hands."

"What if I gave you my word I'd protect her?"

Bowser stepped up to Kitsune, looking up at the clan alpha, "You and I both know nothing in the universe is going to get past me. Let the princess come, I can't think of a better way to let her see your culture, your people in action. I'm all for kicking some piranha ass."

Amber eyes narrowed, searching his face for truth. She snarled, tossing up her hands in acquittal, "Damnit. Fine. _Fine._ Let's go. There's just enough time to get ready."

She peered at my suitors, "And what of you?"

"I'll ride with you," Silver replied.

"I'm in," Ryu nodded.

"Super Weegee is-a in!"

"Let's give these bastards hell."

Taurus shook his head, "I will not join your heroic brigade. Let the others do as they wish."

"I'm of the same mindset," Zero spoke, "I will not go into the fray."

"Fine. Let's roll."

We returned to the village where the once busy, peaceful atmosphere was abuzz with frenzy as the Canine clan prepared for siege. Citizens towed valuables by carts, arm, and by the backs of trusty Chows as they were herded to safety by warriors. Taurus joined the growing refugees without a second thought or even a look back. Though silent, Wolfe shook his head in reprehension.

"What a selfish asshat," Wolfe muttered under his breath, golden eyes tight, "He only cares about himself...He didn't even say goodbye to Daisy."

Zero peered at us and smirked, "Unlike him, I do wish you a safe arrival princess."

I laughed dryly, "Thanks."

Before joining Taurus he took my hand, pressing a kiss to my hand. Zero turned on his heel and left. I shivered, hoping to never have that displeasure again. However the collective vexation on my suitors' faces almost made it worthwhile.

Several warriors approached, each tall, sculpted with powerful muscles and long ebony hair that hung in thick curtains. They reported to Kitsune and each of their squadrons were ready for battle. Heh they didn't say 'ready for battle' they said 'ready to kick some ass.'

After running through a list of orders, she poked her finger into my clavicle, "You come with me Girly and Empress Meringue you may join us."

"Sounds like a party," Bowser grinned, "Can a studly king tag along?"

"Studly?" Kitsune looked like she wanted to laugh, "And here I thought _my _ego was out of control. Sorry girls only."

"Drat," he laughed, even snapping his fingers.

"Come with us King B," Wolfe appeared. He smiled at Grammy, "I don't trust Tar-Tar and Zero, would you watch over Puppo?"

She smiled, taking the blue puppy, "Of course Lord Wolfesbane."

"Please ma'am just Wolfe," he laughed, "That formal crap is just that: formal _crap_. Now let's go King B."

"But I don't like you losers. I want to go with the girls. They're better looking than you ugly mugs."

"..._Hey_!" Wolfe gasped, offended, "My face is _not _ugly!"

We walked into a tent lined with various weapons and trinkets. It was big enough for two cozy hammocks, two fur rugs and a fire pit in the center. Surprisingly there were modern photos hung on the tent flaps. Most of them were of a little boy with a large smile; heh Wolfe was such a cute kid.

The oil lamp flickered weakly, a faint ginger glow against the darkness. Sage poked his head in curiously, before leisurely sauntering in. Grammy smoothed the fur behind his ears as Kitsune weighed each weapon before handing them over, "Blunt club, smack the shit out of things. Petite knife, hack the shit out of things. And well, those are the only things I think you won't harm yourself with."

"Good call," Grammy laughed, "it would be really sad if the princess skewered herself."

"Gramm—er_ Queen Meringue_!"

Kitsune grinned, "Does it feel like something you can handle?"

"It's okay," the club was a little heavier than an aluminum baseball bat but this was doable.

Then she eyed my form, "Hmm. You're pretty puny," and with that she went rummaging through a sack.

_Gee thanks_.

Grammy smirked shrugging in a 'Sorry she has a point' manner. I arched an eyebrow as she laughed. Guess I would be 'small' compared to Ms. Amazon queen and the busty women of the village; they were tall, buxom, well-built and undoubtedly feminine; it was a man's fantasy come to fruition. The chieftain handed over a fur tube top, thick furry pants and knee-high brown fur boots.

"If you're going to hunt with us, then you got to wear our war clothes."

"Right."

"Ooh, it feels so nice," Grammy cooed.

I fingered the soft furs of the pants and tube top; it was far less modest than usual, but this wasn't my culture. Without a second thought, Kitsune stripped, removing her top and pulling on a short, mid-drift bearing fur tube top similar to the one I'd been given. I snickered with juvenile humor; I hope her top doesn't pop off! 'Cause its got one_ helluva_ job to do holding her 'melons' in! I'm also guessing being modest isn't a part of Canine culture either.

I started to undo my dress's fastens and ribbons with painstaking care. Kitsune smirked, "Here, let me lend a hand."

"Oh. Thank yo—"

She touched the back of my dress and...

Ripped it into halves. I gasped, the destroyed gown puddling at my feet in strips of chiffon. The sudden exposure left me stunned, blushing brightly as I quickly tried to cover myself. Half-dressed, I futilely crossed my arms over my bra. Kitsune's hearty chuckles flooded the tent, "You're too damn cute. No need to be shy Hon. It's just us girls."

"Right," Grammy looked like she wanted to laugh, "It's not like we can see your _chichis_ or anything."

"_G-Granna!" _I hissed hotly.

Both women laughed. Cheeks flushed, I muttered under my breath.

"And Sage? He's a guy Chow isn't he?" I laughed, hiking a thumb at the large animal, "I don't trust him."

The midnight blue Chow growled, sounding surprisingly affronted. Kitsune laughed, nuzzling her Chow, "Aww see what you did? Offended the poor guy! Don't worry Sage, she didn't mean nothing by that."

"Yeah! Well warn me next time you decide to...do that!" I cried.

While Kitsune outfitted herself with nasty-looking weapons, I dressed, fitting into the snug furs and pulling on boots. These were really comfy! So were the pants but wow! You could wear these shoes all day. The tube top was in fact just that. It was tiny and revealed most of my stomach.

"One last touch," she dipped her fingers into a red powdery substance and dragged it across my cheek, drawing a symbol on my face. Then she spread a mark over my lips. She stepped back grinning. Grammy beamed approvingly.

She handed over a small mirror. A bright, blood-red symbol was drawn on my cheek, also my lips were rouged. It wore like lipstick.

"What does it mean?" I asked, studying the mark. It looked like an upside down heart.

She grinned, "The mark says 'I'm a noobie, please protect my ass.'"

I scrunched my face, "Hey...!"

She laughed, "I'm joking hon. It means 'strong heart.'"

"Very suiting," Grammy added.

"Hmm. I like that. What do your markings mean?"

She had red, green and blue markings on her face, blending into a fierce triage of color. She smirked, "It means 'Badass boss lady'. Now come on, let's gather with the others. Let's roll out Sage."

* * *

><p>It wasn't minutes later when the others appeared. And may I say my jaw dropped. A group of tall, ridiculously chiseled men appeared. Tan skin taunt and ripped with gorgeous muscle definition. My weakness were beautiful abdominal muscles and they <em>all<em> had them.

_Mmm. Delicious._

Thank the Stars they were shirtless. Thank the Stars for such blessed miracles.

One of the beautiful guys smiled largely and winked. Oh! Duh! 'Cause it's Wolfe! Behind all the fierce face-paint I almost didn't recognize him! Oh wow. He was ripped. Someone ought to call the cops because that guy has _GUNS_. I caught myself double-taking his firm physique; the benefits oh marrying a Canine were _very _clear. Hunters had rock-hard bodies and beautifully sculpted muscles a woman could admire. And Wolfe had a six pack that could quench your thirst.

Yummy, yummy, yum, yum...

Kitsune was smirking, probably amused by my unabashed ogling. What does she expect?! She has an entire village of tall, ripped, beautiful men! This could be an ad: come to Land's End: our blessed bounties of men are all chiseled.

I smirked, shooting a grin at Bowser. He still wore his Koopa shell but had a few streaks of bright war paint across his cheeks. Did he even need to look meaner!? His glare alone could make children cry and puppies wet themselves. Luigi stood to his side shirtless like the Canine warriors. Unused to being so undressed, he blushed red as his plumber potbelly glinted in the sunlight.

Silver was bashful as well; topless, cheeks red and skin ghostly pale beside the tan complexions of the Canines. And then, like the brilliant glow when the sun parted through clouds, Ryu appeared. He was perfectly at ease, a hand resting on his hip as his corded muscles were relaxed and lethal. He was shirtless.

_Shirtless._

I stared.

No. Let's be honest here; I _gaped._

He wasn't as tall as the Canine, but _whew, _he certainly gave them a run in the 'hot bod' department. It was then I understood the word sexy. I mean what? Does he work out all day and _never_ eat junk food?! Why wear clothes when you look like _that_. There should have been an angelic chorus of singing angels because that bod was heavenly. _Hallelujah!_

He must have drank milk growing up, '_cause it did his body good!_

...Okay, no more terrible puns. I swear I'm done.

I wiped my lip, making sure I didn't drool in public.

"You missed one side, dearie," Grammy laughed, eyes twinkling.

I blushed, cursing under my breath; why did she always notice my embarrassing moments?!

"We're ready to go."

"Alright, let's get the Chow and head out."

Grammy frowned, "You sure I can't come? I won't be much trouble..."

Kitsune's grin softened, "Your eminence I'm barely letting your granddaughter go. There's no way it's happening. Maybe some other time eh?"

Grammy nodded her head mutely; I was surprised by how disappointed she was, "Yes...some other time I suppose..."

Kitsune squeezed Grammy's shoulder affectionately, "I'd ride with you any day my queen."

A fellow warrior stopped next to the chieftain, "We've gathered the best Chow as instructed."

The solider motioned to a line of horse-sized Chow. Each Chow was a different shade of the rainbow: a purple Chow hummed, a red one was busy trying to touch his tongue to his snout, a green Chow nibbled on his tail as a black Chow sat perfectly still, eyes closed in meditation. A chunky, chubby yellow Chow yawned tiredly.

How cute! They all have their own personalities. I stopped before a light blue Chow. His round, gold eyes peered back. He titled his head from side to side, carefully analyzing me.

"Who's this guy?" I asked, patting his snout.

"He's Nuttsy."

"Nuttsy?" Silver laughed, "T-That's a funny name.

"Well," Kitsune sighed, "We call him Nuttsy because..."

She coughed pointedly, turning her head away. We looked over and the Chow had his leg raised, excitedly licking away at...

_Oh boy._

"He's named Nuttsy _'cause he licks his own balls_!" Bowser roared loudly, exploding with laughter as Luigi snorted.

Kitsune grinned, "Thus Nuttsy. He's not all that bright. Damn stupid honestly but he's a good hunter. I think it's the only time his head works."

"I'll take Sharpeye," Wolfe walked up to the red Chow and nuzzled his snout.

"How about-a this Chow?" Luigi motioned to the chubby yellow Chow. Kitsune spoke,"Butterball."

Ryu hiked a thumb at the black Chow who sat tall, posture perfect and gaze focused, "Rockstar."

Silver went over and petted a green Chow, "Corkscrew's a good choice. He's a big coward but runs like hell."

Silver frowned, "Wait? _H-How_ does that make him a good choice?!"

Bowser laughed, "Princess Daisy, why don't you take Nuttsy?"

My face turned pale; he was_ still_ licking away. As Wolfe laughed, I rolled my eyes, "How about...no!"

Bowser hummed, turning to look at Kitsune, "You got any strong Chow? One big enough to carry a manly Koopa?"

The Chows perked up, suddenly appearing nervous. They started to bark to one another.

_:Did you hear that?:_

_:Boss-lady wants Long-Horns to ride one of us?!:_

_:Not my problem:_ Sharpeye grinned _:Smiley-boy chose me.:_

:_Nuttsy doesn't mind Apple-girl:_ Nuttsy barked, :_Nuttsy like apples! And she smells like apples! And apples are yummy! But Nuttsy only gets apples when Nuttsy is good Chow. And Nuttsy likes apples! Girl smells like apples! Apples are yummy!:_

_:Long-Horns is huge:_ Corkscrew growled :_He's not riding me! I'm happy to take Ice-hair. You take Long-Horns:_

_:Noooo waaaaay Chow. He'll break my back:_

_:Nuttsy likes apples and Apple girl smells like apples. Nuttsy is happy:_

_:Yeah, not happening here, either.:_

_:Someone must take Long-Horns:_ Rockstar looked around :_Or he will not go. We will fight the piranhas and we need all the help we can get. I'd take him but I took Shadow-boy...:_

_:I'll take the big guy. If he's good enough:_

A huge Chow appeared; rough charcoal-gray fur and built, bigger and more muscular than all the other Chow.

_:Headbanger...?:_

_:I wanna see what has you puppies in a rut. Who is this 'Long-Horns'?:_

"Wow," Wolfe spoke, "He never lets anyone ride him. He's as pleasant as an angry wiggler and that's on a good day."

"He's huge," I whispered.

The monstrously big Chow slowly stomped over to Bowser. His fur stuck up like a porcupine as he growled. The thing looked like a hybrid of a Chow and a werewolf. His narrow golden eyes appraised the king menacingly. Bowser approached until he was eye to eye with the large Chow. They stared unblinking.

One moment they were locked in a heated stare and the next, Bowser was smirking, patting Headbanger behind the ears. The big Chow growled, eyes closed in pleasure. The Canine seemed stunned, heck I was stunned; what made things change so quickly?!

"I guess King found his ride," Kitsune was bemused.

"He's big and bad enough," Bowser smirked, patted Headbanger's head, "And he feels the same."

As Bowser nuzzled the big Chow's head, I turned to Kitsune, "So who am I going to ride?"

There was silence.

I realized my mistake with the funny looks I received. Grammy grinned, Luigi and Silver blushed and Ryu laughed softly. The not-so-subtle bastards however, Bowser and Wolfe both raised their hands, evil grins on their faces.

Without missing a beat, Kitsune yanked her son's long ponytail, wrenching him backwards. As Wolfe whined, Bowser grinned. Grammy pinched Bowser's arm. He gasped, "Oow! What was that for?!"

"That was for being facetious young Koopa," she grinned.

And then it happened so fast I thought I missed it; Bowser pouted.

"Don't give me that look!" Grammy laughed.

"You'll take Sage."

I peered at Kitsune, "Huh?"

"Sage. You're taking him."

A couple of the canine warriors looked surprised, "But he's the best Chow!"

Headbanger snorted in what I can assume was disagreement.

"And therefore, the princess should take him. Hell, he's the best protection I could offer." She looked into Sage's eyes, "Take care of the princess okay?"

The Chow nodded his head and with one last affectionate pat behind the ears, I clambered onto Sage. He stood, rising to his paws as Kitsune jumped onto a brown Chow. Poor Nuttsy, no one chose him. Grammy peered at me, holding Puppo in her arms. She reached up and took my hand, "You be safe _Pichi_."

"I will Grammy," I squeezed her hand and with a final affectionate clench, I let go. Puppo whined as Wolfe came over, riding the red Chow, "C'mon boy, I'll be fine."

"One quick thing!" Grammy snapped a picture of me sitting atop Sage.

Grammy backed away, waving at me one last time before joining Zero, who had been awaiting her. Kitsune grinned wickedly, "Let's ride."

Weapons were brandished towards the gleaming sun as a bloodthirsty roar of approval met her wild laughter.

* * *

><p>A large lush open pasture laid ahead bright with thick emerald-green grass and lush vegetation. The sun blazed overhead like a torch, raining down nothing but scorching misery. A giant herd of piranha plants loomed in the distance, bathing in the sun and splashing around in a lake.<p>

We stood miles away peering at the unsuspecting creatures. Anytime another animal approached, they snarled, puffing up to three times their normal size. They were huge, ten times bigger than all piranhas I've seen and according to Kitsune they were foul-tempered and volatile.

"Look at those things," Kitsune snarled under her breath, eyes narrowed dangerously, "just sitting on their fat asses, sucking up the waterhole as if they own these lands."

"They migrate from waterhole to waterhole and suck it dry," a member spoke softly, "It's never good news when they show up near the village."

"The piranhas have caused some serious droughts," Wolfe spoke to me, one of the few times I've seen him serious, "They're vicious creatures and attack anything within a mile's radius."

"They've come into our village before, destroying numerous stores and trampling children and the elderly to death," another member growled, "We can't let them get any closer."

From here they were specks but the Canine clan swore they could see the piranhas as clear as if they were ten feet away. I knew Koopas also had great distance vision and superior hearing. The Canine clan stood at attention, golden eyes glowing like the surface of the moon.

The striking force was split into two teams: Team A was the diversion inclusive of the best riders who would engage the hostiles and lead them where both a trap and Team B waited. Team B were in Kitsune's words 'the ass kickers.' Team B would ambush the piranhas and bombard them until they retreated. Luigi and Silver would ride with Team A as Bowser, Kitsune, Wolfe, Ryu and I rolled with Team B.

Team B waited in gauche silence, sitting atop a hill overlooking the prairie. A scout looked at their alpha chief, "On your signal."

Kitsune nodded her head, peering at me sternly, "Any of those piranhas give chase and Sage is getting you out of there."

"But I wanna hit one of them," I pouted.

"You're a violent, twisted girl," then Kitsune beamed, slapping Wolfe's back, "Marry her Wolfe. I approve."

The other Canines laughed as Wolfe blushed, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. A splotch of red appeared over a distant hill; that was the signal. Team A was in position and ready to go. Kitsune bobbed her head, "Send the signal."

Wolfe raised a large blue banner into the sky, catching the wind current. There was a howl and then Team A was in action. We fell silent, wishing for the success and safety of our comrades. Amongst the blurs of motion and Canines, Silver's whitish head of hair stood out like a star against the dark sky.

At Team A's approach, the piranhas suddenly snapped to attention, perking up. They let out hellish shrieks, pursuing furiously. Those big things ran fast! They were catching up to the Chow, some piranhas coming dangerously close to catching the riders.

"They're coming," a scout whispered.

Kitsune grinned our way, "Ready?"

We saddled up, mounting our Chow and arming weapons. Bowser lifted me onto Sage's back and I shot a glare his way; no one else had any help. But this was bigger than my ego; we were about to ride into a dangerous melee; a battle ground with no rules, wild beasts and no protection but the camaraderie between you and your Chow.

I was friggin' excited.

Just as Team A darted past, Kitsune raised her hand and released a vicious growl. We roared, springing into motion as the piranhas appeared confused. It was mayhem, dust clotting and darkening air, the deafening tromping of running Chow, the war cries of the Canine warriors and the shrieks of the furious piranhas.

Kitsune laid down the law and bludgeoned the hell out of a piranha with a fluid swing of her club. Wolfe's ball and chain hovered overhead like a dark halo and with an animalistic roar he nailed a fleeing piranha. Once the piranha was downed, Wolfe pumped a fist in the air and howled.

While the piranhas were off balance, Team B attacked and hit hard. Ryu knocked three arrows and let them fly in rapid succession. His arrows flew in a graceful arch, two of three arrows burying in a screaming piranha. Bowser rode by my side, acting as a sentinel. He looked menacing, a beast riding ontop a monstrosity. Headbanger was big and strong enough to plow headstrong through piranhas twice his size. If there was a Chow for Bowser to ride; it'd have to be the one with a terrible temper and built like a monster truck.

We stayed away from the fray, watching as the Canine clan and Ryu kicked some serious butt. This wasn't fun at all; we should have been out there. Bowser looked eager, claws flexing and muscles tense. His red eyes flashed around the battlefield, drinking in every glorious moment of combat with something akin to longing. Headbanger would growl every now and then, wanting to be in on the action.

Bowser wanted to be out there fighting. And I was holding them back.

"Bowser."

He turned his head my way. I grinned, nodding my head, "Go kick some ass, I'll be fine here."

He blinked, "I signed on to protect you."

"You want to be out there, I can see it on your face. Go out there and make some noise," I laughed, punching his shoulder.

He grinned wickedly, "Those crazy doggy-people do look like they need some help..."

"Then go."

"Alright," he growled, face suddenly fierce; looked like he had on his gameface, "I'm about to kick some ass. Be safe til I get back. You ready to bleed 'em out boy?"

A startling vicious bark ripped from Headbanger. Bowser laughed dauntingly, expression scarily wicked and with that they exploded into the fray. Even over the battle Bowser's bloodthirsty roar carried.

'Horseback' combat wasn't Bowser's forte or style so the Koopa king dove headfirst onto the nearest piranha, tackling it to the ground and wrestling furiously.

He reeled back and with a roar punched a piranha clear across the prairie. Then he grabbed two more giant weeds and wrestled, laughing gleefully at the taste of battle. As he fought completely dominating, he laughed, fangs bared sinisterly and eyes ablaze. He was enjoying himself and why not? He was a fine warrior. But he and Headbanger were brutally ripping them apart.

And here I was. Alone. I sat away from the battle, completely bored. And helpless. I couldn't just sit here and watch them all. Sage watched everything with his usual keen eyes, golden specks flickering like a pendulum.

"They need our help, let's go."

Sage growled what I assume was his disapproval. I sighed; right, Kitsune told him to stay put and keep me away from danger.

How boring.

"Come on, they need our help," but again Sage rejected my idea with a snort.

"Your mistress will need your help. And I know you want to be out there too. Kitsune said you were the best Chow. Can I see you hunt? Can I see how the best Chow moves?"

Sage growled, the sound rumbling deep from his body. His coarse fur stuck up, pricking against my legs uncomfortably.

Either I really made him angry or he really does want to be out there.

His ears swiveled around his head and immediately he snapped around. Charging at six o'clock was a stampede of piranhas. They were barreling straight for us, snarling and snapping their teeth. Oh crap just didn't cut it. If we stayed here we were lunchmeat.

"Let's get the hell outta here!" I screamed.

Sage exploded into motion, paws pounding away with a zest of speed. It wasn't minutes later when we entered the chaotic battle grounds where everything was amuck. Piranhas appeared out of nowhere, snapping and flying at us but Sage didn't break stride to avoid them.

He knew what he was doing. As I grasped his thick fur, he galloped in long, beautiful strides. He had to be running as fast, if not faster than a sand cycler. It was amazing to feel his muscles clenching and relaxing, running like a well-lubricated machine. As he ran a rush of wind brushed against my face in cold streams. Sage expertly navigated through the chaos, avoiding fellow Chows and charging piranhas.

"Good job," patted his fur.

Sage barked an affirmation.

_Heh cool._

As Kitsune said, the piranhas were clever and the advantage of surprise wore off too soon. They fought back fiercely, spitting toxic gunkballs and snapping their massive jaws.

One piranha trailed after us, flapping large leafy wings to propel forward. It was gaining dangerously and with a violent snap of its jaws, it missed my ankle by inches. Then a second snapped at Sage's left leg; these things were smart enough to try immobilizing the Chow. Sage retaliated, ruthlessly donkey-kicking the offending piranha.

Headbanger charged into the piranha, following through with a savage head-butt; guess that's a well-deserved name.

Bowser appeared, grabbing the second piranha by its neck and hurled it into another plant.

"T-Thanks," I smiled, "Oh! Look out behind—"

Snapping around with a ferocious roar, Bowser slammed his fist into the face of piranha that had been sneaking up from behind. He tossed a wink my way before Sage and I took off. Weird, his pupils were thin slits, reptilian in nature; maybe it's a Koopa instinct? In the heat of battle he became fluid, shifting into a predator, an animal.

As I pondered the quandary, three piranhas surrounded a goldenrod-yellow Chow up field. The piranhas struck, triple-teaming and slamming into the Chow with a succession of vicious body slams. With one last crushing blow, the yellow Chow crumpled, howling as it plummeted into the grass. The Canine warrior was launched into the air. He fell, landing on his leg at a crucifying angle.

The injured rider screamed, clutching his leg as he wreathed in pain. The downed Chow's ears perked at his master's distress and it hobbled, running to retrieve his injured rider. Several piranhas barricaded the yellow Chow, blockings its path. While the yellow Chow was engaged, a second set of piranhas loomed ominously, creeping towards the fallen rider. They grinned maliciously, saliva dripping from razor-sharp fangs in syrupy-thick globs.

"Sage! He needs help!" I cried.

Sage swung into an effortless u-turn, galloping towards the downed rider. Our bold charge into battle made Bowser peer in our direction curiously. The three piranhas loomed over the downed rider laughing.

I wasn't going to let something happen. I was not going to sit back and do nothing because of my royal title. I'm very well aware I lacked knowledge, experience Chow-riding, knew next to nothing about combat, or even how to use a club but I did know how to swing a baseball bat.

And I swung for a line drive.

With a roar I teed off on the nearest piranha, the club made contact with its fat head. The attack was enough to cause the other piranhas to scatter wildly as Wolfe and Kitsune enclosed my position moments afterwards.

Gold eyes ablaze, Kitsune looked none too happy seeing Sage and I in the fray. Something tells me I'd get an earful after this. Or just straight choked out.

One piranha halted, standing over the fallen rider as we slowed. The hostile piranha snarled and as Wolfe moved closer, it stepped on the injured man's broken leg. The injured Canine cried out before snarling. I may not speak piranha but its message was obvious, "Come near me and I'll kill him."

A tentative circle engulfed the showdown as Canines and piranhas alike gathered; one half was composed of the Canine clan and other half were the leering piranhas. We were at a tense, unstable stalemate. If action didn't take place soon, I had a terrible feeling the injured man would be killed.

Then Bowser snarled loudly, the sound ripping through the clamor of piranha barks and furious shouts. Interestingly enough the piranhas fell silent, attention honed on the king. The piranha in the middle of the circle replied, wiggling its wings and hissing. A conversation of snarls and growls continued between them.

"The hell is going on?" Wolfe asked, topaz eyes flickering between the two tersely.

"I believe they are communicating," Ryu replied.

"What did it say King?" Kitsune bellowed, clutching her club tighter, "Does it want an ass-kicking now or later?"

Bowser laughed, "The abridged version is: he and his fellow piranhas think you're all a bunch of half-step push-overs."

The Canine and Chow growled together in a menacing rumble. Kitsune laughed darkly, "Really? I've heard better insults from my three-year old niece who-"

"And he said the piranhas are going to one day rip your people apart, destroy your towns and eat your young while their heart beats. There was something about ripping off your offspring's junk too."

Wolfe paled, gulping loudly. I laughed when he checked 'the goods'.

"And then they'll barf on your graves," Bowser said gingerly, "Did he say barf or puke? It's hard to tell since he has a really thick accent."

The grin on Kitsune's face disappeared with alarming speed, "Alright. I vote to kill it."

"Me too!" Wolfe snarled, tightening his grip on his weapon as Sharpeye growled.

This made the other piranhas snarl viciously, puffing up and waiting for the trigger to fight.

"F-Forget me," The injured Canine gurgled, "And kill it..."

"Bear..." Wolfe frowned.

"Yeah like I'm going to let that happen," Kitsune spat, "I'm not going to let Zorro's cub die from a piranha bastard."

"Sit this one out Kitty," Bowser growled, "I'm gonna kick this guy's ass."

"We can handle this ourselves, we don't need—"

"I want to," Bowser smirked, "Consider this as a gift from the Darklands for being such courteous hosts. Or some crap like that."

Kitsune narrowed her eyes in consideration. She peered at Wolfe who grinned, bobbing his head in approval.

"I don't think I have to tell ya," she grinned ruthlessly, "to kick some ass."

Bowser guffawed, "_Please._ I am King Bowser after all. Kicking ass is in my DNA."

When Bowser walked into the center of the circle, I'm sure he intentionally brushed his bicep against my leg. My knee tingled from the soft scrape of his scales. Even Sage noticed the subtle gesture, now watching Bowser with perked interest. I arched an eyebrow; jerk.

Bowser walked into the center of the circle, "The rules are, we win and those things leave you alone for ten months," Bowser spoke, "however if I somehow manage to lose, you guys will move from your land for ten months."

The Canine growled darkly. Kitsune sneered, "Take over our land? And leave us with the barren lands_ they_ thoughtlessly destroyed?!"

"I'm not too sure about this," another Canine warrior spoke, "That's almost a year."

"I'm not losing this one," Bowser licked his fangs, eyes narrowed. The king growled back a response and the herd of piranhas spoke amongst each other in shrill barks. Something tells me lady and gents that we're about to have a showdown.

The piranha moved forward, making sure to crush the canine's ribs with one last brutal stomp for good measure. I gasped and turned my head away from such cruelty; it made my stomach turn.

Bowser and the piranha glared each other down looking ready to put the showdown into motion. The king Koopa released a furious roar as the piranha spat, sneering; as they began to move in a circle Bowser got loose, cracking his neck and rolling his shoulders as the piranha growled, slowly licking its fangs. I was worried; the piranha was at least three times Bowser's size. The Canines snarled their cheers as the piranhas snapped their teeth and hissed.

"Kick his ass, King!"

"Pummel him King B!"

"Break his ribs!"

The piranhas rattled and yipped with glee. The contestants rushed forward, locking arms as they snarled, testing each other's strength.

I watched, too stunned to say anything. Wolfe roared, "Get 'em King B! Choke him out! Pull a Brett on his ass!"

I shot a grin at Wolfe who winked; they really liked the movie! The piranha spat an acidic loogie, barely missing one of Bowser's horns. Just as Luigi and the rest of team A migrated towards the fight, the acidic snot flew his direction.

"Lulu duck!" I shouted.

With a girly screech, Luigi ducked as the acid flew overhead. Silver blanched as the acid ate through the thick bark of a tree. Bowser wrapped his arms around the piranha and with a furious grunt, sumo-slammed it into the ground with a resounding thud.

The Canines roared with mirth, weapons raised in cheer. Kitsune and Sage howled together. Even Headbanger barked his approval. With each punch Bowser threw and each evasive dodge made, I mimicked his movements; come on Bowwy! Get him! Clobber him! The huge plant exchanged several thunderous punches, slamming its thorny leaves into Bowser's side.

With each punch he received, the piranhas rattled and yipped with glee.

"Ya got 'em on the ropes, Koopa!"

_Come on Bowwy..._

This fight was too close, it seemed like they equally traded blows. If Bowser landed a hit, seconds later the piranha did. They fought like animals, clawing, trading bites and wrestling each other wildly.

"Come on Bowser!" I cried, "Show him who's boss."

The piranha swung, throwing a vicious punch. Bowser moved like water, dodging with a surprisingly fluid grace and pressed his advantage. He wrapped his arms around the massive weed and with a grunt lifted the flailing piranha overhead in a great feat of strength. No matter how the piranha wiggled and kicked, he held it steady.

With a savage roar Bowser pile-drove the piranha into the ground with a thunderous quake. The earth shattered, cob-web thin fissures cracking and popping like bones. Bowser rose to his feet, crimson eyes feral, glaring down his opponent as if daring it to rise again. But the piranha was defeated, whimpering as it saw stars.

All was silent until...

"Ohohohoho _daaaaaamn!"_

There was an explosion of cheer as we celebrated, laughing, hugging and screaming. Bowser threw his head back, arms outstretched as he released a bloodcurdling roar in the sweet air of victory. The Canine rushed forward, whooping and cheering, slathering Bowser with praise. The Canine patted his shell and punched him good-naturedly as Bowser smirked, eyes still dangerously aflame and wild from battle. Even Headbanger affectionately nipped at him.

"Dude!" Wolfe roared happily, "You. Kicked. Its. Ass!"

"You manhandled that big bastard, King!" Kitsune laughed, ribbing him.

"N-Nicely done," Silver smiled, bobbing his head.

I dropped off of Sage's back and ran over. Even with the jostling from the crowd, Bowser turned my way. He smirked, parting the crowd as we met in the middle. I was relieved, happy and laughing, "You were _amazing_!"

"I made the fight closer just so you could worry about me," he grinned.

"Well don't do that again! Next time kick its—_whoa!"_

He grabbed my arm roughly, jerking me flush against his plastron. When he spoke, his voice sounded rougher, more beastly, "You oughta reward your victorious hero. Plant a wet one on me, Gorgeous."

My cheeks grew warm; did he realize the Canine and Chow alike were watching us!? We were at the center of the scene. "Bowser? Quit being silly and-!"

He grabbed the back of my thigh, picked me up and initiated a heated kiss. I gasped, senses screaming and mouth tingling as he growled roughly. My mind went blank, everything else—past, present and future—dissolved away as a delicious sensation stole away my sensibilities. When he pulled away my breath was stolen, knees as stable as jello and cheeks terribly enflamed.

He grinned darkly, red eyes blazing as I panted, heart-hammering and blush glowing. A couple of Canines shared sly smiles as Wolfe glared, cheeks red with anger. Luigi snapped up, horror on his face, "Bowser-a! _Look out-a!"_

We turned around. The defeated piranha struggled to its feet, breath coming out in ragged gasps, snarling viciously as it shook with anger. It reeled back, spitting an acidic glob barreling our way.

"Clear the area!" Kitsune boomed.

Bowser grabbed me and turned his back, using his shell as a shield. The force of the blow made him jolt, knocking him off balance. A bow string was released and the piranha fell to the ground, dead. A small puddle of acid sizzled, eating away a bit of Bowser's thick shell. He growled irritably.

"Mama Mia..." Luigi whispered, eyes wide with surprise.

I gaped; four arrows were lodged into the piranha's side. Ryu stood valiantly, blue eyes severe and pointer finger still outstretched from the release. Once he saw the threat neutralized, he lowered the bow, relaxing.

"Nice shot..." Silver whispered in awe.

"Damn," Wolfe wrapped an arm around Ryu, "Good to have you around, Ry."

The piranhas were deathly quiet. At the sight of their dead plant, they chirruped softly to one another. They're sad. A few waddled forward to collect their fallen comrade. When they neared us, those soft chirrups and gurgles became angry snarls. Unsure of their motives, Bowser stepped in front of me, growling in a deep, rumbling bass. The piranhas may have snarled and snapped but they only wanted to retrieve their fallen piranha.

A canine knocked his arrows, ready to take aim but Kitsune raised her arm, "Let 'em pass."

"If we had lost, they would have chased us across the continent whether or not we lost someone!"

"Maybe but my word is law. Let 'em go. It's never fun to bury someone. They're mourning."

"That leafy bastard is lucky he's dead," Bowser growled, "this was my favorite shell!"

"He could have hit your skin and yet you're worried about your shell?!" I snapped.

"Now I look like a hobo."

I laughed, "No one can even see the hole! It's barely noticeably."

"I-a can see it!" Luigi chirped.

"Shut it Greenstache."

"See?" Wolfe smiled, speaking with his mother, "I told you they were both badass!"

"That reminds me…You! Girly!" Kitsune boomed.

She stomped over as the others helped their injured man. Kitsune stopped a few inches away, arms crossed and looming. Her golden eyes were feral, alive with fury, "You completely disregarded my orders Girly! You went waltzing into danger, took a joy ride on Sage, got attacked by those piranhas and—"

Her pause during the verbal assault made me crack an eye open, "—if you didn't get out there, we may not have Bear around."

I smiled but then she reached out and pinched my nose, "Ey! Leh go! Whub is dah fah?!"

She laughed, tussling my hair, "_That's_ what you get for ignoring my orders. Now come on, we've got a big celebration to attend! No causalities, a safe journey and of course an amazing king and princess! Let's go!"

Cross-eyed, I rubbed at my sore nose, "Hopefully you won't do that again…"

* * *

><p>The village was aglow with an infectious happiness and sense of victory. It was twilight as the people of Land's End prepared for a large celebration. Firewood was gathered, meats and fish put to roast over the fire as pies and cakes baked. And Kitsune said the 'mother load' of wines and alcohols was being brought out.<p>

By nightfall the celebration was in full swing and the humid air had cooled. There were dances and songs fireside and there was no shortage of good food and booze. There was much merriment and a humongous eating contest the villagers revered. Bowser entered, which made Kitsune and Wolfe join. The three of them ate a disgusting amount of cooked red meat. Kitsune and Wolfe tied for second, eating twenty three roasted ribs a piece as Bowser shoved down an appalling sixty-five. And then following that was the belching contest.

Guess who won that, it shouldn't be much of a surprise; Bowser had everyone in thunderous laughter when he burped the Darklandian nation anthem with flare. Then there was arm-wrestling and tug-o-war, which Bowser was the unchallenged victor.

He seemed more like the guest of honor than I did. Half an hour later found Bowser resting by a fire, basking in the praise and glory of his famed victory against the piranhas. As the canine continued to leave gifts-food, wine, wooden beads, trinkets and other valuables-I appraised him from a distance.

No matter what I did, or how much delicious food I ate, my thoughts circled back to this afternoon. I chewed my lip in thought; why...why did he kiss me? I could still remember every detail; the feel of cool claws against my leg, the warmth of his lips, the rumbling growl in his chest.

I blushed, looking away; he wasn't just showing off to be macho? Win a fight then grab the nearest girl and kiss her? There was a deep chortle, "I must look amazing tonight. You've been staring this whole time."

I blushed; Bowser had been completely aware of my intrusive stare, "I...was just wondering about something."

"Then 'wonder' about it over here," he grinned, "Don't make me come over there and getcha."

I walked over and gave extra care to avoid stepping on his massive gift pile. He offered a box of candies, "Want some? Lemon tangies make me sick to my stomach. Never got how you humans like this trash."

I barked out laughter and helped myself to the delicious treat. It tasted fresh; like it had just been made, "Because it's absolutely delicious that's why!"

I sat beside him, clearing off a few trinkets and gifts to make space. I nibbled on another lemon treat, pretending to savor the taste as I planned my course of action. How would I go about asking him about the breath-taking kiss? 'You kissed me, I demand an answer?!'

Hmm. No.

He arched an eyebrow and grinned, "Well...?"

"Uh..." I stared at my feet, "Earlier today you..." I swallowed, "you k-kissed me and I kinda..."

He smiled, "Kinda liked it?"

"Yes," then I realized what he said, "No! _No!_ I-I meant no!"

Bowser laughed, "Ooh my! Flower had some fun. You know," he leaned forward, smirking darkly, "if you want another all you need to do is ask..."

"Ah...?"

"Here_ kitty, kitty~_" he growled, smiling treacherously.

Stars, why was this turtle always so_ amorous_?! And he seemed to only turn it on even more in public. Several heads were turned in our direction, watching the spectacle. I scooted away only to have him move closer. He was grinning and when I moved away, he moved forward. Rinse and repeat until I was on the edge of my seat. He was laughing, leaned over with puckered lips and a silly grin, "Kissy! Kissy!"

I laughed, palms pressed against his plastron to hold him at bay, "Stars Bowser! You're so_ obnoxious_!"

"Give me a kiss," he purred, "and I'll stop..."

"Mister Bowser!"

"Hey! Mister Koopa!"

He paused, looking up, "Huh?"

I laughed, watching as children crowded around Bowser, asking to touch him. He flexed his bicep, letting the kids touch his 'guns'. They unknowingly fed his ego as the oohed and awed.

"Mr. Koopa we heard you beat up a piranha!" A young boy spewed excitedly.

"We heard it was as big as a tree!" A girl cried.

"As big as a mountain actually," Bowser replied, a grin tugging at his mouth.

"_Woooooow!"_ The children chorused with awe.

"I heard you body slammed it and then blew fire!"

"I heard he broke its neck!"

"I heard he made it cry to its' mommy!"

"Sit down children," Bowser chuckled, "Settle down and come join Uncle Bowser's story time circle."

_Uncle Bowser's storytime?_ Sounded like a terrible place for children to hear tales if you asked me. I laughed when the children scrambled around the fire, peering up at him starry-eyed.

"So there was a Koopa. He was tall, brave, handsome," the kids laughed when he ran a hand through his red mane 'dashingly', "and every girl was in love with him. Girls were like," He made his voice sound 'girly', "_'Ooh! I love him! He's so cute!'_"

The kids laughed, giggling with silly glee. Bowser smirked, relishing in their attention. He shot a sly smirk my direction. I froze; what's he planning, "And then there was one girl, who loved Bowser the most of all. She had red hair and big eyes. Everytime she saw Bowser she went _'Oh! I love Bowser sooo much! I wish he would kiss me!'_"

The kids laughed, "What was her name?"

"Her name was Maisy."

Oh _Good_. Thank the Stars he gave such a mysterious alias 'cause _no one_ would guess it was me! Some of the kids grinned, shooting impish looks my way; I'm going to choke out that turtle.

"So Bowser and Maisy went to the prairie to make-ou—(I glared)_ahem_ to play a game together and suddenly a piranha plant appeared."

A low 'Oooh' traveled through the pack of kids. "The piranha said," Bowser crossed his eyes and spoke in a stupid voice, "'_I'm going to attack Land's End because I'm an ugly, stinky jerk! And I'm jealous of that Koopa's sex appeal! Duuuuuh_!'"

The kids laughed as he continued, one of the boys raised his hand, "What's sex appeal?"

"It's a peel of a fruit right?" A girl asked.

"Sex fruit?"

"If it has a peel, it's a fruit!"

"Oh..."

I burst out laughing as Bowser grinned, "I've got loads of it and that's all you need to know." Bowser continued his tale, "So then Bowser said _'My friends live in Land's End. Mess with them and I'll punch you so hard, your belly button will disappear_!_'_"

"And then what?" A girl cried.

Bowser grinned, "And then Bowser punched him so hard his belly button disappeared."

Again the kids laughed, some even lifting their shirts, checking to make sure they still had belly buttons. This only made me laugh harder; they're so cute!

"And the day was saved and Maisy was like _'My hero! Let me give you a kiss_!'"

I halted; whenever guys intimated girl voices, why was it always in some stupid falsetto?!

"Did he kiss her?!"

"Kissing is yucky!"

"He said _'Maisy, we are friends and I like you. But we should respect the boundaries of our friendship_.'"

I glared at him incredulous as Bowser laughed, continuing the story, "But then Maisy said _'Shut up and kiss me you fool!'_ And then they kissed. The end."

"_Eeeeew_!" The kids laughed.

"Hey! Kissing is fun," Bowser looked up, "Just ask Maisy." He directed the open ended statement at me.

You know what!? Screw him! I turned on my heel and trounced away, ignoring his loud laughter. As I walked past the gathered crowds, away from the fire were Wolfe and Kitsune. Even when they tried to be 'discreet' they were way too obvious. I mean they were in a two-man huddle in the middle of the road. Also neither of them had a soft voice.

"Now's the chance to get that young lady alone," Kitsune coached, wagging her finger, "Take her to 'the place' and lead her there. Be calm, cool and most importantly: don't be an idiot. That's a point I can't stress enough, boy."

"I can manage that," he replied softly," I really like her...I wanna impress her."

"Then do as I say oh and for crap's sake," with each word, she enunciated her point by sticking her finger into his chest, "do not tell a damn joke."

"B-But my jokes are awesome!" He whined.

"No. They suck. My Stars they're terrible. Now then, take her to the 'spot', point out how pretty the stars are. Oh and one last thing."

"What is it mom?"

I could hear the grin in her voice, "No sex. You try anything with that girl and I'll kick your ass. Got me? She doesn't have childbearing hips anyways."

I blushed, placing my hands on my hips; what does that even mean?!

"_Moooooooom!_" I almost laughed at his mortification, "I'm not like that!"

"Good!" She gave an affectionate noogie, "Then go get her, tiger! I'm sure I just saw that bright red hair somewhere..."

I walked away, feigning interest at the nearby apple orchards. Wolfe appeared by my side within seconds. Gone was the scary war paint and serious warrior and present was the friendly smile and amicable young man, "Hey there."

"Hey Wolfe," I smiled up at him.

"Wanna go...somewhere? It's kinda loud here don't 'cha think?"

And almost as if to prove his point, two burly guys appeared, wrestling each other with savage glee. A small crowd cheered them on as they went.

"Erm...Let's go?" I thought I saw a sweat-drop appear on Wolfe.

I laughed, "Sure."

He smiled and reached for my hand. His hands were huge, warm with long calloused fingers.

"Gosh your hands are small," he said softly.

"Well yours are huge! You can probably knock people out!"

He laughed, swinging my arm as we walked. The cool blue, violet undertones of Sage's cobalt coat caught my eye. He waited nearby, feigning disinterest. Wolfe hopped on his back effortlessly. And with a big smile, Wolfe stretched his hand out.

I smiled, clasping his hand. Single-handedly Wolfe hoisted me up to ride behind him. He peered at me over his shoulder, "Ready to rock?"

"Yeah."

"Make sure you hold on tight."

Blushing, I chuckled as I wrapped my arms around his middle. He grinned and with a whoop, Sage shot off in a blur of speed. I laughed, adrenaline pounding as I held onto Wolfe.

"Yeeaaah! Woohoo!"

* * *

><p>"King."<p>

The Koopa king had been content to watch some of the macho arm-wrestling competitions going. These people were kooky but they were definitely his kind of kooky; wild, lively and willing to get roaringly drunk. This had been a relatively badass night and it still baffled him humans had been behind it all; this felt like a bash Koopas would throw: there was an abundance of mouth-watering red meat, good food, some pretty potent booze that made his eyes water...

You know, for humans they weren't half bad. All they had to do was start a few public fights, obscene make outs and they were good.

The distinct soft pitter-patter of approaching footfall made him swivel his head. Acute Koopa senses let him know it was the busty chief with a rack rivaling a Koopette. She smiled wickedly, incisors bared; maybe he liked these people because they were similar to his own; wild, bloodthirsty sons of bastards.

He watched a couple make out sloppily, even falling off a table to so do; yep, he could totally see the similarities. Kitsune eyed Bowser with a smirk, "We're about to have a drinking contest and we'd be damn foolish not to have a Koopa join. Its' been awhile since someone drunk me under a table. I'm hoping you can fix that."

Bowser chortled, "Lady please, don't embarrass yourself. I will drink you under houses and motels."

"Embarrass?" She laughed, "What's better than getting drunk and making absolute fools of ourselves? I want to wake up tomorrow and play the 'I shouldn't have done that last night' game."

Bowser laughed. The crazy alpha woman barked, "Someone get the Koopa a keg! Have you touched an ounce of our beer yet? The _special stuff?_"

He laughed, "No."

"No? Hey! I said someone get the Koopa a beer! Don't want him to think we're manner less savages."

The moment she said this, five men in a brawl broke a table from their wild fight as a crowd roared with murderous cheer. Kitsune either expertly ignored the debacle or somehow didn't hear it. The former obviously, "And keep refilling until we start singing Koopa drinking songs."

"Count me in."

Bowser's eyes could have dropped out of his head when Queen Meringue appeared.

"I'm never the voice of reason," Bowser gasped, "But I don't think you should..."

The queen shook her head, "Oh, nonsense. I'm just going to have a glass, nothing much."

"Back in the day I heard the queen could drink people under the table," Kitsune grinned.

Bowser smiled so large his face hurt, "...I'm not going to ask because I already know it's true."

"Someone get the queen a glass!" Kitsune roared, "And a special for King. Let's sing some Darklandian drinking songs!"

"_Psshaw!_ I like you people but not _that_ much," he smirked, "Drunken songs are a bond of camaraderie. It's a sloppy, puke-filled moment filled with dirty jokes and crappy balance. Two Koopa remember such a milestone and form a meaningful bond for life."

"Then let's build some camaraderie!" Kitsune grinned wickedly.

"I'll pass."

"Oh come on! Not a single song King?"

"Nope."

"You know you wanna sing a drinking song."

"It ain't gonna happen. Even if I was smashed outta my mind I wouldn't do it. Mark my words."

* * *

><p>"<em>Ohhhhhhhhh<em>! There once was a pretty ole Koopette I knew! A curvy gal with long red mane and eyes so crystal-blue! I tried to marry 'er but she always knew, with a rovin' eye and wanderin' claws she knew my heart weren't true!"

"Heeeeey!" The crowd cheered, raising their mugs and dancing to the fast tempo of the drums.

Grammy played one of the flutes, tapping her foot in tune with the folk melody. At one table sat Silver, Ryu and Zero. Silver hiccuped, sluggishly staring at the bottom of his cup, deciding if it was empty. The Moonstonian prince was incredibly drunk, laughing, crying and making a terrible fool of himself. During one part of the evening he had been dancing around with Canine girls and asked Kitsune to marry him.

To prevent further embarrassment, Zero had decided to 'babysit' Silver who had been nothing more than a pain in the ass. He looked to Zero, "Is this...em-pty?"

"_Yes_," Zero deadpanned, not even bothering to check, "For the _fifth_ time, yes you've drank it all and now you're drunk."

Ryu laughed softly; the Shinobi heir had been a bit more prudent—figuring Canine alcohol got your ass drunk _fast_—and drank only enough frothy brews to be relaxed. He drank half a mug and realized anymore would make him a complete buffoon. Ryu tapped his fingers in tune to the lively folk music, nodding his head.

"Where's Taurus?" He asked.

Zero shrugged, eyeing his beverage, "He believes himself above all of this."

When Silver tried to reach out and touch a Canine that happened to walk by, Zero slapped his hand way; it seemed like Silver _wanted _to get his ass kicked.

"A-And you don't?" Silver laughed, face flushed red and eyes too bright, "Y-You're a jerk too. Don't you think Ryu? Ryu. T-That's a nice name. D-Does it mean something?"

Ryu laughed , "It means 'dragon.'"

"It means what?"

"Nevermind," Ryu _tried _not to laugh at Silver because that would have been rude; keyword being _tried._

"B-But don't worry Ryu," Silver wrapped an arm around the Shinobi leader's shoulder, "I like you. Y-You're not stuck up a-and...a big...fat...jerk...Mmm, you smell nice. Like trees or something."

Ryu smirked, shrugging at Zero, "I suppose the saying is true, alcohol eliminates your inhibitions."

Zero was nonplussed, "I see this as an opportunity to observe a new culture and fortify alliances. This is not a time for silliness. Speaking of which..."

Zero motioned towards Luigi who danced on stage with no reservation as Bowser sang. Ryu broke out into laughter when Luigi started to do the worm. Tapping his foot in tune with the rhythm, Bowser continued his song, "So one day she came up to me and asked if I missed herrrrr..."

Bowser drew out the note, making the crowd peer up at him curiously, "I said 'What? I may have chased you but I wanted your _sisterrrrrrrrrrr_!"

As he belted out the last note, the crowd exploded with a cacophony of laughter, Kitsune guffawed wildly as she clinked mugs with the nearest person.

"But I wanted your sisterrrr!" The crowd chorused with mirth, laughing as they sang along.

More roars of approval raised as Bowser chugged the large glass in one single go, frothy thick foam leaking down the sides of his face. Luigi, who was borderline drunk started to dance the can-can and the crowd began to cheer, clapping in rhythm to his silly dance.

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

Bowser, who was either slightly tipsy or not wanting to be out done, joined him.

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

"Hey!"

* * *

><p>Wolfe took me to a place where all the cheering and merriment was muted. We stood near a quiet, calm lake. In its' surface the white moon peered like a giant unblinking eye.<p>

"I wanted to bring you to a quieter place so we could talk a bit easier," he smiled, "Hard to do with all the celebrating going on."

"Yeah," I chuckled, "Well at least we're away from-"

An amorous couple came by, wildly kissing and giggling. They were terribly sloppy, slurping disgustingly and smacking and tripping over each other. They were laughing wickedly in between kisses and...other amorous activity.

I tried not to look at them as Wolfe cleared his throat uncomfortably, "You wanna...uh...get the hell outta here?"

I laughed, "Please can we get out of here?!"

Wolfe grinned wickedly, "They're eating each other's faces! Ugh it's disgusting as hell."

He looked at Sage, "We're gonna be in the cave for a bit. Just relax alright?"

Sage chuffed softly, trotting away. We walked towards a cave, "It's not too dark but it's a cool place to go when you want to be alone."

The rocky walls were a deep eggplant-purple, rough and damp to the touch. A cool, pearly glow came from glowing stalactites overhead. The cave was just big enough to house a shallow pool, the reflective surface glowing as if lit with electricity. The cave walls had silly caricatures drawn; most of the drawings were of Chows and the same male character doodle doing different things. I laughed.

"Huh? Oh," Wolfe grinned largely, "Like my art? I've been drawing it since I was a cub."

I squinted at one of the pictures and laughed, "Is that supposed to be you?"

"I drew it when I was six. I wanted to look like my dad; tall, strong and tough."

I glanced at him, "Mission accomplished."

He was also cute.

Wolfe half-smiled, rubbing at the back of his head as his gaze dropped to the floor, "You know, when Ma first told me about this whole marriage thing, I was...kinda pissed. Felt betrayed even."

I looked up, "She wanted me to meet a princess from a distant kingdom and try my best to impress her."

He touched one of his old drawings, eyes dreamy and faraway, "I didn't want to pretend to be someone else 'cause most girls thought I was weird or too goofy." His voice softened, "I've met foreign princesses before and not a single one of them liked me...They were really snobby, the type who doesn't want to ruin their manicure and hair."

His golden eyes flickered onto me, "But you, you're..._different_. You're funny, sporty, heck, we spat loogies together and had fun!"

We both laughed, "What kind of princess does that?! And then you helped Bear today when he broke his ankle."

I grinned, "Your spitballs were better though."

He laughed, a deep, soft sound. Usually when he spoke, Wolfe had a rough growl to his voice but it seemed muted in comparison to the others in the village. He moved an inch closer. I had to crane my neck to see him. Geesh, was he always so tall? My head barely came to his torso. He might have been an entire foot taller.

Damn. Everyone from Land's End was tall and ridiculously built; gotta wonder what's in their water.

"Maybe, but my point is," his eyes were warm, gold like the sky at sunset, "you're...awesome."

"I think you're awesome too. You're one of my favorites that's for sure. You're free to speak, run, play, have fun in your village. We have so many rules in my kingdom it's maddening."

Wolfe nodded, "Yeah I noticed. Your dad sounds like a thesaurus when he talks. I have to think really hard when he speaks. It's like...I know what he's saying but it doesn't make sense!"

I laughed, "And that's just the tip of the iceberg!"

His expression softened, "You know, I usually don't...pay much attention to girls. You're the first one I really noticed."

I smiled, "I guess that makes two of us. Unlike most girls, I'd rather play sports then talk about boys and makeup."

Wolfe grinned before pulling back, "Wait, hold that look."

He went over and picked up a thin rock. He began to draw a cartoon of himself, which didn't look half bad. Then he drew another, this one a girl with curly hair and a smirk. I laughed at the cute drawing. Although I think the cave drawing's hips and bust were a_ little_ more exaggerated than my own...

The two cartoons were holding hands, a floating heart between them. He stepped back to admire his work.

"Good looking couple don't you think?" He smiled.

"I think so."

I studied his profile which held a mixture of fierce and soft features. Like all the Canines his golden eyes and sharp smile were feral but his essence was sweet. I remember what he looked like today against the piranha. He was fierce, a ruthless warrior but when he spoke to me, he was painstakingly gentle.

There was something admirable about a man who was a vicious warrior but then could be kind and good-natured outside of battle.

"Wolfe?"

"Hmm?"

"Bend down, I think you have something on your face."

He panicked, eyes a bit wide, "I do!? Y-You sure? I checked my reflection twice! Ugh damn!" he licked his hands, wiping at his face with zest.

I laughed, lightly tugging the collar of his shirt towards me. I pressed a soft kiss against the tribal tattoo on his cheek. His cheek was warm, tickling my lips with scratchy stubble near his jaw. He froze.

"Today was amazing," I whispered, "Thank you so much. You're a great guy Wolfesbane."

He blushed, smiling largely. He picked me up and spun me in a full revolution. A big, wet kiss smacked onto my cheek, "Aww! You're amazing too! I like you a lot! And so does Mom and Puppo. Sage too! And Sage hates everyone!"

"Can I touch your hair?" I laughed, "It's so long and far prettier than my hair has ever been."

He grinned, "Sure."

His ponytail came to the middle of his back and was soft to the touch. I tangled my fingers within the thick mass, "Everyone in your village has long hair. Well, at least the guys. Is there any significance behind it?"

Wolfe grinned, "All warriors grow their hair and the stronger the fighter, the more hair they have."

"Oh! Then you're a pretty good warrior!"

"I'm _alright_," he smirked smugly.

This made me ponder. Most of the warriors had long hair and most civilians had shorter hair. The girls who flirted with Bowser had shoulder-length tresses. I thought of Kitsune, her hair was near her ankles, "So then your mom?"

"Is the best warrior, thus she's chief! Only chiefs wear their hair that long."

"Huh and here I thought she was super girly with all that hair."

He laughed, "Mom? Girly?! Now that's funny. She might punch me out if I told her that."

I laughed, "I think she's really pretty in a dangerous kind of way: the long, wild hair, curves for days and then she has this...aura about her."

"Oh Stars," Wolfe choked, "She's my _mom_!"

I laughed. He grinned, "But I do think you're pretty."

I blushed, moving my unruly fringe out of my face. He laughed, "So is there a weird rule about not being able to kiss cute Desert chicks?" He smiled, lightly moving the bangs out of my face.

"Technically I'm not supposed to kiss until my wedding and ironically enough that same night I'm supposed to 'consummate the wedding'," I laughed, "It's backwards as hell."

"Heh," he rubbed the back of his head, "Have you heard you can...tell a lot about..."

"About what?" I was grinning.

"A-About..._Argh _I'm so nervous!" He laughed, "And believe me I'm never nervous. This is so weird. You know, like they said in that one movie with Flora and Brett...you can tell if a guy loves you with a kiss."

"So you want a real kiss?"

"W-Well Silver got one. I mean I could smell him on you."

I blinked, "You could?!"

"Heh," he rubbed the back of his head, "We Canines have really strong senses: sight, smell, hearing you name it. If a guy and a girl smell like each other it's because they kissed or..."

I laughed, "Really?! Your sense of smell is that strong? Doesn't that make it awkward? I'm sure if you walk around town...?"

"You learn to block it out after a while. Mated couples, duh they're mated so they should share a similar scent."

I grinned, "So do you smell like any girls?"

He blushed, eyes growing wide as he shook his head vigorously, "Me!? My Stars, Ma would cut my balls off if I did such a thing!"

I laughed, bet there was truth behind that statement. He raised his voice, putting his hand on his hip and shaking a reprimanding finger, "Wolfesbane! If there's one thing I hate more than idiots, it's a manwhore. And I will not raise one! You hear me boy?! You will not be a manwhore!"

His mimic was dead on, it sounded just like her. I laughed, "That was really good!"

"I've always been good at parroting others voices."

I took a seat, back resting against the cave wall. I smiled, patting the spot beside me and Wolfe all but eagerly scrambled to my side. He sat beside me, falling silent, "So you wouldn't have any problems with me ruling Sarasaland?"

"No. Why should I?"

"Lots of people think only men should rule."

"Highlander crap," he hummed, "Never understood some of your people's thinking. No offense."

"None taken."

I continued to study the mystical pale glow of the stalactites. For a few moments there was no sound but the echoing drips of errant water before Wolfe spoke in an unusually soft voice.

"I like you," he said tenderly, "I want to know more about you. Usually people can't get me to shut up but around you I don't know what to say. My hands are sweaty, heart's pounding...I haven't been this nervous since I ate the last cookie as a kid."

I laughed, leaning into him as our shoulder knocked. His golden eyes became hooded, voice lower, "So…What do you say to breaking that stupid old, crotchety kissing rule I won't tell if you don't."

I blushed, "Well...maybe this _once_..."

Wolfe: optimistic, fiery, out-spoken, wild and big-hearted. He was strong and bold, a fierce warrior when necessary but when the armor and war paint was discarded he was sweet, funny and gentle. Maybe he was rough around the edges but so was I. His golden eyes glowed like twin moons as his thumb swept across my cheek tenderly, pulling me towards his strong frame.

A flood of warmth transferred to my form as he titled his head down and pressed his lips against mine with unusually soft fervor. Wolfe, who was always so wild and primitive administered the softest, silkiest kisses. I tangled my hands in his soft hair, cooing. He purred as I glowed. There was some definite chemistry there. His fingers slipped to my intercostals and playfully tickled my sides as I bubbled with laughter. He laughed softly, smiling largely before leaning in again for a second melting kiss.

* * *

><p>"So those are tattoos on your cheek?"<p>

"Yep," he smiled, "Blue and red for warriors, green for farmers, yellow for educators, orange for the builders and only the chief has black and white tats. Oh and kids have white tattoos."

"Does it hurt?" I tried to touch his cheek.

Wolfe laughed, bending into the range of my reach, "Did it hurt? No. Sting yeah."

"So someday you'll have black and white huh?" I smiled.

He laughed quietly, "Someday I will. Just like someday you'll sit on the throne."

I took his hand in mine, beaming. We returned to the village where people were puddled on the floor, tables and even some sleeping on trees. Wolfe laughed, shaking his head, "Looks like another good night."

Then I saw something odd, Bowser and Luigi of all people were holding onto each other, singing merrily.

_What in the world?!_

"Like how the hell does he jump so_ high_?" Bowser pondered sluggishly, "It's...it's so _confusing_!...He jumps and then_ bam_! He's ontop of my head and I'm like 'where did that red plumber go'?"

"I don't_ know-a_," Luigi bemoaned, "Why cant-a I jump like that-a too?! I jump but-a no one (_hic!_) is impressed..."

"'Cause they _suck_ man," Bowser replied, "Everyone's jumps suck compared to Mario. I'm a big guy, I can do midair flips but compared to_ his_ jumps?! They suck. I hate that pipe midget so much..."

"Secretly-a," Luigi nodded his head, eyes squinted, "Me-a too. I hate him too-a."

"I got a plan," Bowser poked Luigi in the chest, "Let's take over the world together...and let's..._not_ invite Mario!"

"_Deal-a!"_

Oh Stars, what in the world has happened since I've been away?!

"And when we take over the world," Bowser continued, even raising a fist to the sky, "you can have...uh what's that pink girl's name? Blonde hair...pink dress? Lots of pink."

"Miss Peach?"

"Yeah her! You get Peach but I get Daisy. She's my queen over the new Bowser-Luigi empire."

Huh?

"No!" Luigi shouted, "I-a want Daisy!"

"Heh, have you seen them _bazongas_ on that girl!?" Bowser laughed, wiggling his eyebrows, "like _damn_."

"Who-a hasn't?" Luigi chimed in laughing too.

"How is she so small but so _racktastic_?"

They both guffawed drunkenly with loud glee and red cheeks. I stared, too stunned to say anything. I blushed, cheeks scalding hot as I slowly covered my torso. I found Wolfe peering at me with consideration, as if trying to find any validity to their stupid words. His crooked grin made me think he was doing it_ just_ to get a rise out of me. But it worked. I gasped, "W-Wolfe?!"

"What?" He laughed, "I'm just sayin' they _do_ have a point. Not to be a crude jerk, but your body _is_ kind of bangin'."

He laughed as I blushed, "L-Look again and I'll_ kill_ you!" I growled.

What the hell?! I'm going to punch all of them! Bowser turned his head my way and grinned, "Hey! _It's Flower!_ I can totally smell her! Koopa senses you know! We see, hear and smell well! She smells like candy!"

"I-a like rock candy," Luigi added.

Wolfe and I walked over. Though glaring, I was bothered by the openly dreamy stares Lulu and Bowser gave. It just looked _absolutely _ridiculous on Bowser's face.

"She's _sooooo_ pretty," Bowser purred, sighing wistfully, "Like Star damn. I can't stop staring at her."

"They've been drinking," I frowned.

Wolfe laughed, "Obviously."

"I'm so _bella_," Luigi sighed. Then he paused, "Wait. She is _bella_. _She Is_! Mama mia! My-a brain isn't working-a!"

Bowser laughed, ribbing Luigi a little too hard, "I know right?! I wanna lick her from head to toe. Licky, licky, licky like a Koopa lolly pop."

"Weegee liiikes," Lulu was singing terribly, "what he seeeeees!"

I blushed, cheeks dark as Luigi belted out the note in a silly falsetto. Wolfe laughed, doubled over by now.

"I'd-a put spaghetti on her cheek, then-a she'd be spaghetti flavored!" Lulu laughed.

"_L-Luigi?!_" I gasped; this isn't surprising coming from Bowser, but Luigi?!

"I have dreams of her _if ya know what I mean_!" Bowser laughed, elbowing Lulu chummily, "And I have this big scrap book. It's light blue and it's filled with all these hot, smoldering photos of—"

"Alright," Kitsune appeared, putting her hands on them both; she looked as if she had been laughing, "It's bedtime boys. That includes you too, kiddo."

Wolfe smiled in my direction, unusually bashful, "Take it easy Daisy."

"Night Wolfe."

Kitsune harrumphed, giving Wolfe a pointed look. He jumped into action, "Good night Princess," he borderline growled, taking my hand and brushing a kiss against my knuckles. Then he walked away, blushing and nervously rubbing the back of his head. Kitsune grinned, the approval glowing on her face.

She smirked, "How about we talk for a bit? Just us girls."

"Sure. But Bowser and Luigi?"

"Will be fine. The night watch will get them to their tent."

We walked around the quieting outskirts of the village. By now the farm animals were herded in for the day, Chows and warriors took nightwatch as the orange glow of fire kept darkness at bay.

"So what do you think of my boy?"

"Wolfe's a great guy," I smiled, "His smile glows like the sun."

Kitsune slid a sly glance my way, "You think he's attractive?"

I blushed; who didn't? He was tall, built, and had the most dazzling smile. Also something about his wild mannerisms was striking.

"Yes..." I said slowly, it felt weird admitting this to his mother.

"Good. You'd have to be mental not to see it," she grinned, "He's become handsome just like his old man. Wolfie used to be such a scrawny little runt."

"Wolfe sounds like he adores his father. He still wants to be as big and strong as his dad," I laughed, "How can that be? Wolfe has to be like six three easy."

"His dad was six eight."

Damn!

"Your whole village has to be on massive growth hormones! What happened to his dad if you don't mind me asking."

"Ah," Kitsune sighed wistfully, "The boy's father was the chief of Western territories. We met during the spring gathering and from the moment we met..."

I smiled, "It was true love?"

"Love? Oh no we hated each other," she laughed, "He thought he was the best hunter but in _actuality _I was. Everything we did butted heads and it was annoying. The sexual tension was way too strong to ignore."

I blinked.

"One day we got into another infamous argument," she smirked, "I smacked the hell out of him and we ended up wrestling and kicking, rollin' on the ground like fighting hogs."

"Okay."

"And, I'm sure you get where we went with that kind of behavior," she laughed.

I raised a deliberate eyebrow; that led to sex?! That rolling around fight?!

"For awhile we tried to work things out. The sex was awesome but really we were no good for each other. He had a terrible temper and mine was ten times worse. He's still chief and rules the Western tribe. He's a stubborn man but I always consider reconnecting with him."

"I smiled, "'Cause you love him."

"'Cause the sex was mind-blowing," she laughed.

I blushed, "W-What?!"

She boomed with laughter, "He gave me my little Wolfie though. Always thankful for that."

"That's sweet."

Kitsune laughed again, "You know when I first laid eyes on you, I thought you'd be a pansy. But you impressed me Girly."

I laughed, "Thanks I guess."

She smirked, "Granted your loogies were pathetic but you're not bad. I'm taken by you actually. Think you can see yourself living here?"

I looked around at the blackening wilderness and the guards standing watch. By now the mayhem had cleaned up, people were back in their tents snoring and others helped the incapacitated get home. The night watchmen stood at attention with their Chows faithfully beside them.

Sage appeared from the shadows and stopped at a distance. His golden eyes glowed from the touch of firelight and though he pretended to ignore us, his ears were slanted in our direction.

"It would be a fun adventure. I'd love it here," I smiled.

She patted a heavy hand on my shoulder, golden eyes warm, "You ever need anything you let me know ya hear? I used to be good friends with yer ma."

"Really?"

"Yeah," she spoke softly, "You look just like her."

"Did you know Dad?"

She laughed, "Only when he started courting Rose. He was calm and cool."

"Sounds the same—"

"But whenever Rose was around he was a wreck," she laughed, "he tried to be 'smooth' but he would always mess up. If your ma didn't pity his failures you probably wouldn't exist! Hell, he could barely keep his voice from breaking when he saw her."

Dad always made their courtship sound so...easy: they met, fell in love and had me. Apparently there were subchapters to this story.

"Let's get ya to bed shall we? Your grandma's been out like a lamp. She tried the strong booze, conked out but ultimately took it like a champ."

"...She did _WHAT?!_"

Kitsune laughed, "I'm kidding."

"Oh thank the Stars—"

"She tried the medium-strength mead and conked out."

"…_Oh Stars_ take me now."

Kitsune bellowed with laughter, pulling me in for a hug as I sighed, smiling tiredly. The Canine were bold, courageous, open-hearted, and honest, if a bit crude. But they accepted anyone of good moral and character regardless of race or class. The village was the essence of a team; working together with neighbors and friends to ensure survival and happiness. I could see myself here and I could envision myself married to a good-natured, funny guy like Wolfe.

My time here was great. I can't wait to see what Luigi and the Mushroom Kingdom will hold.

* * *

><p>Alice: Bowser kicked some ass! ^_^<p>

Ultrra: The Canine are AWESOME! I want to party with them and tispy Bowser. XD

Alice: XD LOL! Review! :3


	23. Kingdom Tour: Mushroom Kingdom

Alice: Hey! Welcome to the 23rd chapter! :3 The reviews have been pouring in. So as you guys and gals all know. I whipped this chapter up like it was going out of style! ;)

Ultrra: (Has a stop watch) And a good thing too. In four hours it would have gone out of style.

Alice: O_O Oh dear...

Ultrra: Mhm. X)

Alice: Good thing we got it out XD

Ultrra: Alotta stuff happened last time! I _love _the Canine Clan. And Kitsune is probably the most awesome of all. Someday I want to marry a woman like her…

Alice: Good luck if she doesn't kill you first X) lol!

Ultrra: But the worst thing was…(Sigh) No one chose Nuttsy…Poor Nuttsy. X)

Alice: You would have taken him? O_O

Ultrra: Nuttsy needs love too. That I'm convinced of. X)

Alice: XD Hmm, you know what? Someone pmed me and asked what game an OC was from. XD _That _I take as the ultimate compliment. If you can't tell the cannon characters from the OCs, I've written them well! ^_^

Ultrra: That or someone needs to play some more games O_O

Alice: (Elbows Ultrra)…

Ultrra: XD Don't be mad! You know what!? I want to _hate _Ryu _soooo_ badly.

Alice: LOL! Why!? XD

Ultrra: Partially because Daisy becomes goo over him, but dude's _such _a badass I can see why. Damn it I don't _want _to like the badass pretty boy. XD I can only begrudgingly respect him and his man-sexiness. XD

Alice: Man-sexiness!? XD Hey! This chapter was beta-ed by Halcyon Electric. :3

(XXX Days ago)

_Alice: Thanks for beta-ing for me Hal!_

_Hal: No problem. And remember I'm a Tiger. Grammar and typos will always be mauled. (Puts on aviators)_

_Alice: O_O Oh my!_

_Hal: (Turns to leave) And now the Tiger must prowl…elsewhere._

_Alice: Cool! Hey! Can I be Alice the Rabbit? :D_

_Hal:..._

_Alice: (Hopeful look) :3_

_Hal: Do you live, eat, sleep, breathe being a rabbit?_

_Alice: That's a little much don't you—_

_Hal: Then no. A Tiger is always a Tiger. Remember that. (Turns and Leaves)_

Alice: Well…And _that's _how this chapter was edited. X)

Ultrra: LOL! I would have told you no too! XD LOL!

Alice:….

Ultrra: Any warnings in this chapter?

Alice: Well…Bowser…He writes himself XD So…Be warned.

Ultrra: OMG lol.

Alice: Hope you all Read and Review! And Enjoy! :3 (Waves)

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: Halcyon Electric<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>The following morning, the thick air was sweltering and sticky before dawn. After the wild night he had, Luigi nursed one of the most inimical hangovers of his life. It felt like there was a miniature Bowser inside his skull, all but pounding the life out of his brain like a pink squishy drum. The awful imagery only seemed to make his headache that much worse. By the time the others were packed and ready to depart Land's End, Luigi had barely dragged himself from bed.<p>

He stepped outside and the sun razed his eyes painfully. A cool shadow cloaked the blazing sun and through squinting, Luigi determined it was the wild clan leader towering above. She grinned rakishly though not unkindly as she spoke, "Mornin' Party Animal. Brought you something that might make the world spin a little less."

Kitsune brandished the tonic. "Drink up kiddo."

She handed him a jar of what looked like melted-down honey. He peered at the viscous fluid suspiciously, but tipped his head back, draining it dry. The sour solution made his lips pucker and eyes water, yet the bitter tonic cleared up his throbbing headache with the miraculous properties of an elixir.

"We get plastered off our asses on a weekly basis," Kitsune grinned, her pointed canines looking especially sharp. "We had better find a cure to hangovers. You and the pale Moonstone kid were _gloriously _trashed. It was hilarious." Her grin grew slightly devious.

So, as Luigi chugged the last of the Star-awful tonic which was bitter, sour, and sickly sweet at the same time, he realized someone else was looming over him. He turned stiffly to figure out who else could make that big of a shadow, only to find this time it was Bowser.

The dulled headache was washed away as a deluge of fear rose. It was always hard to tell when Bowser was pissed because his default facial expression always seemed to be a malicious glare. Even when he grinned, it looked terrible.

The green plumber gulped, "Uh…?"

Despite quivering, Luigi noticed that, unlike usual, Bowser's face did not change at the display of terror. If anything, his glare became darker as he spoke.

"Greenstache," he began, his voice an irritated grumble, "let's lay down the fact that I hate, _hate _your brother. I kind of never liked you for bein' related to him. I guess you could call it a 'nemesis by association'."

"Um..."

"But last night changed things." His back stiffened and his tone escalated, causing a new layer of sweat to slick Luigi's already sopping arms and legs. "We had a drunken camaraderie. When I was up there singing, don't think I didn't see you dancing. It was a tipsy dance worthy of the heavens."

Instead of fear, Luigi's expression morphed into one of confusion.

_What?_

"In Darklandian culture," Bowser spoke reverently, "when two Koopas share a wild night of drunken debauchery and mayhem, a new brotherhood is formed. Like it or not, when we danced drunkenly, we became _skrats_." He folded his arms at that, assuming Luigi would understand the Darklandian term.

"W-What is-a that?"

Bowser rolled his eyes. "It's close to the lame human word for 'bros'. Though 'wingman' works too, I guess. You are now my wingman."

Luigi gaped; Bowser wanted _him, _Luigi Mario, to become his wingman? And something about the intensity of Bowser's stare made him think he wasn't joking. He was Luigi, Mario's brother. He hates him!

"B-But you hate-a Mario!" Luigi's voice stammered in confusion. He began to wring his hands.

The Koopa King shrugged and smirked slightly. "Still do, actually."

"Y-You hate me!"

"Hate? _Eh, _no. Strongly irritated by, yeah."

"So we-a can't be bros!"

Bowser's hair-thin patience was being tried. He snorted, a black puff of smoke wafting from his nostrils. "Greenstache, there are _forces _at work here that are bigger than both of us. It is a _sacred _wingman bond. Are you going to accept the offer or not?"

"I-I-If I refuse?" He squeaked. Luigi internally cursed. His voice was meant to sound more like a man and much less like a terrified toddler.

"If after a drunken night and a drunken Koopa bond of brotherhood has been offered, and is refuted, the opposed must drink himself into a stupor…"

"That doesn't-a sound-a that bad—"

Luigi swallowed hard as the much-taller Bowser craned his neck forward to stare directly into his eyes."…while having his balls cut off, set aflame, then fed to rabid chain chomps."

The green machine gulped audibly; something told him Bowser took this weird tradition to heart.

"There's not much I hold sacred," the king Koopa rumbled, "But this I do. I will use the hottest fire to burn off—"

"_I'll do it_!" Luigi squeaked.

In a sudden change of countenance, Bowser smirked, curling Luigi under his arm and nearly suffocating him in a half-hug, "Good man! Now that you are no longer a chump, I, King Bowser shall assume my role and give you a nickname that is only recognized by other Koopas. You are now known as..."

Luigi raised both eyebrows expectantly, as Bowser scratched his chin in thought. The Koopa then snapped his fingers comically and announced, "Greenstache."

The plumber's expression fell, "What? But I've _always _been-a Greenstache!"

"Before it was _just _a nickname but now, it's a _nickname_. A brotherly term of endearment. You were once a smelly fart but by accepting this bond, you are a fragrant cologne."

"Uh…?" Luigi was unsure.

Bowser stretched out his unoccupied arm and splayed it in front of the two of them, as if showing the green-clad plumber the wonders on the horizon, "You will be taken under my wing and shown the secrets to owning life. And you _will _own life _hard._"

At that rather inopportune moment, Wolfe sauntered by and called over his shoulder, "If you two are done _making out_, then we have to get out of here. Off to the Mushroom Kingdom!"

"Let's go _broham_," Bowser pulled Luigi into an almost bone-breaking bro-hug and winked.

Bowser had _winked._

Luigi was scared stupid.

Bowser, the gigantic Koopa who had been trying to megaton punch his lights out for as long as he could remember, was being _kind _to him. Even on the airplane the Koopa king was nice, no longer spouting off snide taunts and threats, but Bowser actually acted as benevolent as an evil king could, filled with 'brotherly' ribbing and too hard slaps on the back.

"Remember that time in Mario Kart when your loser-ish big bro won the Mushroom cup in 150 CC? When he accepted the trophy, I threw a rock and hit him upside the head like—"he mimed, reliving the glorious moment of throwing the offending rock, "—_PING!—_and he fell off the podium! Like a _loser!_ Even _Peach _laughed at him!"

Bowser guffawed with obnoxious chortles and affectionately slapped Luigi on the back too hard for the fifth time; Luigi probably had a purpling bruise now. So now that he had been adopted as Bowser's wingman, Luigi could only ponder one thing; _does that make me evil too?_

"Wanna know my secret to picking up babes?" Bowser wiggled his eyebrows, "I don't want to give you the secret to that _yet…_Okay _fine_, I'll tell you since you look so _eager_. So you need three things: A tusk horn, a vat of goomba lard and a speedo. _Trust _me, you _need _the speedo. To approach a girl you—"

_I miss the days when Bowser was trying to kill me. This is the _ultimate_ torture._

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><p>As we flew to the Mushroom Kingdom, I surreptitiously studied the love note. I reread each beautiful word again and again with girlish gusto, heart screaming in elated trills. I couldn't <em>believe <em>how badly I gushing over a secret love note. It was so…unDaisy-like.

But it was a _love _note!

Ever since it was posted on my door, I kept the note bedside and read it every morning when I woke. Someone here adores me and I'm determined to know who. Maybe it was Silver? He was so shy, but I could not deny how his eyes glowed when he saw me.

Wolfe? He was so blunt and outspoken; could he manage to craft such pretty words? Luigi? Shy, sweet Luigi? It was a possibility. It couldn't have been Zero or Taurus. What about Ryu? Surely the debonair clan leader was suave enough to write some verbal lurvin'. Regardless of the author, I would clutch the note to my chest after each reading in uncontainable glee.

Don't you _judge_ me.

That's when an impossible thought came to me.

What if it's Bowser?

The ecstasy faded slightly, and I held up the paper to read it again, as if I missed some weird calling card that could clue me in.

_Bowser _writing _poetry_?

I broke out laughing, snorting even. There's no _way _it was him. I mean come _on_, Bowser?! I'd already acknowledged his chevalier chivalry, but writing poetry? I find it hard to believe he's romantic. Unless I see him down on one knee with a handful of roses, I'm not buying it.

That did make for a good laugh though.

Grammy touched my arm, startling me from my girlish stupor. "_Pichi _could you do your grandmother a favor? I left my CD player in the bathroom. Be a good girl and get it, would you?"

I smiled, "Of course."

I rose from my seat and strolled to the posterior of the plane. Wolfe and Ryu beamed at me as they continued an amicable conversation. On the way there, I turned a corner and nearly bumped into Zero's shoulder. I grew tense as a slippery smile crossed his face, "…Princess."

I replaced my expression with a mask of apathy. "Zero."

And with that he stepped to the side. As I brushed past, he spoke in that deadpan tone of his, "Is there something going on?"

"What?" I huffed, "With what exactly?"

"King Bowser," he remained impassive, "He is in love with you."

I froze, trying to contain my surprise. Judging by Zero's utterly slap-able expression, I could tell it wasn't working. "_What?_"

"It's a fact," he stated.

I didn't even consider his words. I turned my neck ever so slightly towards him, just to show how little of a mouser's ass I gave. "Why does it even matter? When did you ever care about me?"

He was silent. I huffed, arms crossed and back stiff, "In fact why did you volunteer to be a suitor of mine? I don't know about these other guys, but what's in it for you?"

"Clarify yourself princess."

I snorted sarcastically. "This. Why become a suitor? Did you think I'd _magically_ forget our childhood? You've thought I was completely hideous since the day you laid eyes on me."

Zero hummed thoughtfully, "It's a matter of self-investment actually."

"You're going to have to explain that," I laughed darkly, "because you're crazy if you think I'd pick a bastard like you."

His slight grin grew sickeningly as he spoke. "I'd like to clear the air and say pretending to like you was all Father's idea. I find myself constantly questioning if you're a full blown lesbian or just an uncannily masculine girl. I'm rather fond of the prior."

_Ouch._

My blood boiled under my skin and it wasn't long before I was beet-red. "So then why try to even marry me, _seloh_, if I'm that damn unattractive!?"

He closed his eyes as his disgusting smile grew. I could have throttled him right there. "You're a means to an end princess. It's possible for me to rule over Sarasaland one day, and you just happen to be the instrument to achieve that."

I was just an _instrument_ to achieve reaching the crown to this prick. Wow. I didn't know whether to be happy or furious he had no compunction about being so brutally honest.

"I'm just _curious_," I spat, "Let's say one day I go crazy and consider marrying someone as awful as you. Why would I marry a bastard like you when I have several other suitors who like me? Why would I choose you?!"

"In the plainest terms," Zero deadpanned, arching an eyebrow, "contracting a marriage with me will lead to Sarasaland's most secure future."

I scoffed. "_Really_? I thought that's why the council wanted me to marry Prince Taurus."

Zero appeared pensive, his dark eyes narrowed, "I suppose he would be a good alternative. _But_ my intelligence has revealed an unsavory character. A man with too many skeletons in his closet is either sorely unlucky or a really clever butcher."

I cocked my head to the side a little. "Prince Silver?"

"Another good choice, third to Taurus. While the Moonstone kingdom is brimming with precious material and medicinal advancements, Silver himself is the flaw. He lacks backbone and the strength of conviction to rule."

My face began to scrunch deeper and deeper as he continued his rant. "Wolfesbane."

He snorted, "Everyone knows the people of Land's End are knuckle-dragging Neanderthals. Such savagery doesn't have a place in high society. Not to mention he himself is a hapless idiot."

"Why not Ryu?"

He arched an eyebrow condescendingly. "Hmm. He's always been a bit of a mysterious, hasn't he? Annoyingly so. I have very little material on him. Though I suppose that would make him a wildcard. Not wise to gamble Sarasaland's future."

"King Bowser?"

Zero laughed derisively, "Let's not be ridiculous princess. King Bowser is the _poorest _of all the choices. The catastrophes of a Koopa-human marriage would be epidemic. Nay, _apocalyptic_. Though we like to think of ourselves as progressive, it is a thinly veiled lie. The idea of existing in a post-racial society is nothing but an optimist's mirage. If you married a _Koopa, _even Sarasaland would disown you."

I fell quiet, a tingle of defeat softening my sharp tone. "Again why would I marry you? What do I gain?"

Zero's expression remained neutral, though his gaze seemed probing, "I'm a reasonable man. I would allow an open marriage. Do whatever you wish with whomever you wish," he replied, not batting an eyelash, "I would not care how many 'associations' you had so long as you were discreet and went unnoticed by the media. You and I would be husband and wife through contract solely."

I wrinkled my nose. "A marriage riddled with infidelity? That's disgusting."

Zero half-smirked. "And yet royals have been doing it for ages. Mistresses on the side...a tryst with a maid here, a vacation with a handmaiden there..."

I sneered, "You're out of your mind."

"Am I now? It's the most practical choice princess. I'm the _only _suitor who has Sarasaland's best interests at heart," he oozed, "I realize it's your duty to the throne to birth an heir. I suppose I could staunch my absolute disgust until you're with my child."

"The thought of touching you makes me ill," I growled, "I'm not doing..._anything _with you."

"Good to know we feel the same," he grinned, "in any case, you would not be miserable with matrimony to me; I would not be cruel or abusive. All I'd want is my heir and then I wouldn't require anything more of you, save discretion."

"For a man who is utterly repulsed and disgusted by me, you're sure pushing this marriage thing," I laughed dryly.

Zero had a pensive mien as he retorted. "Despite having the personal charm of a boar, I find you reasonably attractive. If you weren't trying so hard to be a preteen boy, I wouldn't be disgusted at the prospect of marriage or the _consummation_ of it."

If looks could kill, Zero would be dead several times over. I was disgusted by the temerity of his thoughts. In return I called him some words that should not be repeated.

He chuckled darkly. "Like it or not, you'll see I'm the best choice for Sarasaland's future. I'm the only suitor who proactively wishes to invest in our fair kingdom's success."

"You're worse than Taurus," I spat.

"You'll find out soon enough who the real monster is. Not every prince or _king _is as charming as they'd like you to think. I'm the only man being completely honest."

He seemed content to study me, trying to decipher the encryptions of my emotions. I purposely turned stoic, "You are dismissed councilor, take your leave."

Despite his imperious air, I was still his princess and when issued an order, he had to obey. If Zero was surprised by my cold directive, he didn't show it. He bowed and swiftly took his leave.

He went to his seat beside Silver and reclined comfortably. I entered the bathroom, shutting the door. My head spun, thoughts and fears coiling and snaring into thick tangles of stress and anxiety. Zero unapologetically admitted to using my back as the stepping stone to the throne. Wooing me had never been in his plan; it was the glory of kingship he sought and in his trail to sovereignty, I had been immaterial. I couldn't say I was surprised, but nevertheless the honest sting pissed me off.

And for his information, I could do _way_ worse than Bowser.

I could be stupid and marry him.

Dumb _seloh._

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><p>It wasn't too soon when the Mushroom Kingdom territory appeared in a welcoming rush of green landscape and bright flora. The skies had fully transitioned from the misty orange of Land's End into the piercing blue of the Toadstool Royal Airspace.<p>

We arrived at the palace, landing in Princess Peach's personal airstrip, just south of the castle. Even on the cusp of summer's arrival, the Mushroom Kingdom was lush and green. Peach's signature petal-pink dress drew my eye as the plane touched down and fluidly came to a stop. At her side were the legendary Mario and her chancellor, Toadsworth.

A slew of Toad servants had been gathered, each one wearing vests and spotted fungi caps in all shades of the rainbow. The airplane sighed as it came to a complete stop, and a Toad valet rushed to the door and opened it with a swift bow. He helped Grammy out before chivalrously offering a hand to me. I stepped out, smiling at my awaiting cousin and her court.

Peach had waited beside the airplane as we disembarked. She stepped forward and pulled me into a tight hug, "Daisy! Grammy! I'm so happy I get to see you both!"

"My beautiful little Peach," Grammy crooned as she hugged and stamped a coral-pink lip print on her cheek, "My dear you're as lovely as a sunbeam."

Mario stepped towards us and tipped his hat respectfully, "Princess. Empress." He smiled broadly. "_Benvenute! _Welcome!_"_

I beamed, pulling him into a quick one-armed hug, "Hey Mario!"

"Still jumping for miles and miles, eh Super Mario?" Grammy laughed and nudged him with an elbow.

"Princess Sarasaland it is good to see you again," Toadsworth hobbled forward and bowed, leaning on his cane all the while.

He then made a show of pulling down his glasses to peer at Grammy. "_Empress Meringue_, if I am not too bold may I say you're looking rather dapper."

"Oh, Toadsworth, always the silver-tongued devil!" Grammy tittered, placing a hand over her mouth coquettishly.

Toadsworth looked pleased, fixing his bow tie in a 'suave' manner, "Why if I were fifty years younger, _dare I say_, I'd ask you to join me on a stroll. With_out _a chaperone."

He wiggled his eyebrows playfully, and I gaped at the entire situation. Grammy sounded mockingly scandalized. "_Toadsworth_! You sly ol' shroom you!"

They both chuckled. I stared blankly; what in the _world _was that? I glanced over at Mario and Peach, both of whom glowed with amusement. Toadsworth cleared his throat, "Oh, _er-herm_, yes! Welcome back to our gracious kingdom! I'm sorry that His Majesty is unavailable. He has a …terribly constricting schedule."

"We understand," Grammy smiled as Peach rolled her eyes.

It was not much of a secret how Uncle tried to do as little work as possible, preferring to spend his time 'living' through dancing, playing golf and doing everything _but _sovereign work. Therefore his slacking-off led to the brunt of the monarchial burden falling on the shoulders of Peach and Toadsworth.

I shrugged, smiling softly, "I'm sad I won't get to see Unc. It'll be weird not having to see his craz—"

"_Heeeey_! Where's my sugar!? It's my two favorite people in the universe!"

With a huge grin, Uncle Apricotto dashed towards us, arms outstretched and already reaching for a hug. His robes were aflutter as the giant crown nearly slipped from his blonde head. I tried not to laugh; it was probably the least lord-ish thing to do, to run out and greet your family with whooping cheers.

But that was Crazy ol' Uncle Apricotto. He had to break hundreds of protocol daily in order to be himself. Rumor had it _he _was the reason Toadsworth had aged so quickly. Speaking of which, the elderly toadstool looked absolutely scandalized, "M-Milord! You're supposed to be meeting with the lords of Marrymore!"

Uncle Apricotto made a show of scoffing and flourished his hands in a devil-may-care manner. "Bah, they can wait! When am I going to see my mom and niece again soon?!"

"B-But milord!" Toadsworth squeaked exasperatedly.

"Relax Toadsworth!" Unc called out. Then he stumbled over an errant chunk of cement and almost slipped and fell. "Oopsies! I'm okay people! If you don't eat it, then the slip doesn't count!"

Laughter bubbled up infectiously as I tried to cover my mouth. A Toad with red spots shook his head, as if knowing the futility of it all; getting Uncle to act regally was like trying to get Bowser to wear lipstick, red heels and swing on a pole.

I may or may not have inadvertently scarred myself for life with that mental image. Uncle kissed Grammy before picking me up and spinning me through the air.

Count that as another broken royal decorum.

"Daaaaisy! Giveeeeee me some sugar!" He sang, slathering my cheek with ticklish kisses as I giggled uncontrollably. "How is my favorite girl?! You look more and more like your mom every time I see you! Thank the Stars you don't have your dad's busted ol' ugly mug!"

"Unc!" I laughed, "I'm doing good! How are you?"

"Great now!" He slapped an arm around Peach's shoulder. Peach gave an uneasy smile. "We've been looking forward to your arrival!" A moment later, his face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. "I know! Let's go play a round of golf! I'll take the entire day off!"

This made me laugh. See? Always trying to get out of work. Luigi popped out of the airplane, only to be swarmed by welcoming friends. Mario trapped his younger brother in an affectionate noogie as the Toads laughed.

"Welcome back Master Luigi!"

The environment fell silent as Bowser appeared in the doorway. The tension was as thick as cream as his narrowed eyes surveyed the crowd. The Koopa King grinned, amused by the false bravado he saw. And then it happened. He locked stares with Mario.

Bowser stopped grinning.

Mario's knuckles popped.

Bowser's eyes tightened.

My face blanched as I realized what was about to happen. I turned to fully face him, and shook my head stiffly; _don't start anything with him_. Bowser's eyes flicked onto to me briefly, and his expression softened a fraction. But it was only a matter of time before they fought.

"See something you-a like Bowser?" Mario crooned.

"_I'm gonna kick your ass!_"Bowser bellowed.

"Not before I stomp-a yours!"

As Mario stomped forward, Bowser leapt out of the plane, nostrils billowing with dark smoke. A couple of my suitors exited the plane with curious expressions, watching the showdown with interest. I even heard Wolfe begin to chant, "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

Peach rolled her eyes, and the two of us moved simultaneously, with her blocking Mario's path as I ran in front of Bowser. Though he snarled and brandished his fist, he did not shove me out of the way. He glowered at his foe.

"Let me get him once _real _good Flower!" he growled, mouth glowing with fire, "I'll bounce his head like a basketball."

"No fighting Bowser!" I hissed, placing my hands on my hips and returning his glare.

Bowser snarled, seemingly indecisive, before dropping his clenched fists and turning his head away from Mario, "If midget Mario so much as _sneezes _my way..."

With a sigh of relief, I peered at Mario. Peach smiled smugly at me. Good, she had subdued Mario too. Mario also had his head turned, glaring everywhere but at Bowser. It was pretty funny they stood in the same pose, head turned away, and a sneer on their face.

The other suitors held varying degrees of amusement as they watched the epic gridlock. I did not miss how the boys were smart enough to stand back, just in case the two titans did fight.

"Ten on Mario," Zero offered smoothly.

"You kiddin' me?! Bowser would _whoop his ass_!" Wolfe crowed.

"Twenty on-a big bro," Luigi hummed.

I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. _Gee they were a big help_. Bowser released a snarl before peering at the Toads with a wicked smile, "Well. Maybe I can't kick Mario's ass. But..."

He deliberately cracked a slow grin at the trembling Toads. "We're going to have some _fun_ today. Aren't we, gentlemen?"

The Toads whimpered, backing away from him. Even Toadsworth hobbled back. "Erm...W-W-We would be h-h-happy t-t-t-t—"

"Bowz, my Koopa!"

Crazy ol' Uncle Apricotto struck again. He appeared out of nowhere, startling several Toads and Bowser. Either Unc was not astute enough to notice the obvious tension, OR he just didn't care. Both options were equally possible. Uncle slapped the back of Bowser's shell hard enough to make an audible thud. Bowser's demonic smile deflated as he peered at Unc disbelievingly.

"Hey there, big guy! Welcome to the Mushroom Kingdom! Glad you're not pillaging my kingdom this time!" Unc laughed and nudged Bowser with an elbow as if he shared a good joke.

No one else laughed.

"You're _touching _me..." Bowser growled. I perked my eyebrows, amused. I would never have thought Bowser would be the kind of person to have personal space issues.

"Hey!" Uncle pointed to the Toads, "did you know I'm friends with him! With _King Bowser. _We're 'cool'. We're 'down'."

I _barely_ resisted slapping a hand to my forehead. Did Uncle really try to use hip vocabulary?! I sucked in a laugh as Peach hid her face into her hands. Mario hid what looked like laughter as Luigi grinned; they too were used to Unc's crazy antics.

"We've been friends since Daisy's par-tay!"

Unc needs to stop. He's going to hurt himself. I won't be able to breathe if he keeps this up. He's crazy as hell.

"Bowz my koopa, wanna hang—?"

"_No._"

Bowser looked pissed. Uncle could be choked out.

"My king," Toadsworth wisely interjected, "We have a tour to give in honor of Master Luigi. Let's not...ahem, _aggravate _King Bowser, eh?"

Uncle Apricotto shook his head sharply, as if dispelling a daydream. "Oh yes! Yes of course."

A couple of Toads removed him—forcibly—from Bowser's side. Stars love him, but that man is a complete and total spaz.

Toadsworth approached the irritated Koopa king apprehensively. When Bowser peered down at him with a hooded glower, Toadsworth whimpered, shrinking into himself.

"Erm...You'll h-have to f-forgive our dear king. He's a bit..."

He paused, searching for the right adjective, "a bit—"

"_Stupid_? _Insane? Spaztastic?_" Bowser supplied with a growl.

"Oblivious. Now come. Let us flee—I mean begin the tour." Though he hobbled away from Bowser, I noticed he didn't show his back. "We have plenty of carriages to take us through the kingdom! Onward ho!"

* * *

><p>While the suitors loaded up in the carriages, Peach assembled her courtiers. She smiled brightly and spread her arms. "I'm very proud of you all! You all did well in the face of Bowser's appearance and not one of you fainted. We trembled but we did not faint! I think we deserve to give ourselves a round of applause!"<p>

The princess began to delicately bring her silk gloves into a soft yet cheerful clap. The Toads followed suit, clapping, smiling and cheering.

"I'm opening the circle now," Peach sing-sang, "Anyone want to share their feelings? Sharing time has opened."

And the Toads loved sharing time.

"Princess, did you see me?" A Toad with blue spots spoke. "I barely trembled! Remember? Last time I saw Bowser I had convulsions!"

"I didn't even scream!"

"I stared him in the eye...for _two _whole seconds!" A Toad with red spots exclaimed. "I looked away in fear...but then I looked at him _again_!"

There was an impressed wave of 'oohs.' Peach beamed, nodding her head.

"I didn't wet myself this time!"

"I didn't have any involuntary bowel movements!"

"I put my cane down this time!" Toadsworth said with pride, head held high, and he tapped his cane on the ground lightly. "I told myself, 'Self! I will not run away and throw out my back again!' And I did not! By Jove, I stood my ground like a chevalier knight!"

"Yes," Peach cooed, "There was vast improvement all around and I am proud of each of you. We will celebrate with milk and cookies at a later date. Now then, let's pull it in for a hugsie." Peach spread her arms wide and beamed, "Who wants a hugsie?"

"_Hugsie_!" The Toads chirped happily.

"Backrubs always add to the warmth of hugs," Toadsworth added sagely, "And as citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom, it is our duty to give great hugs!"

"Yes Toadsworth!" The Toads cooed in chorus.

They all cooed, bringing in the circle as they received a heart-felt hug. Today was off to a great start: first a promise of cookies, praise from Peach and now hugsies.

Life was amazing for the Toads.

* * *

><p>Our first stop was the bustling Toad Town, the prized jewel in the Mushroom Kingdom's glorious crown. The quaint settlement was aglow with activity as Toads of all sizes and shapes swept through the charming town.<p>

If there was a real-life fairytale town, then it was here. _Hey, that could go on a post-card._ Everyone greeted one another warmly. Every house was quaint and homey, with perfectly manicured green lawns and beautiful floral bushes.

Each Toad was an honest, humble, hardworking citizen. There was no crime—save for Bowser's occasional kidnappings—so, there was no one on the streets, no hungry children, no stray animals; this place was Nirvana.

This was Toad Town: voted as the best place to live in the entire kingdom. It was considered to be the safest town in the kingdom as well, to the point that the citizens didn't bother to lock their doors at night, in case their neighbor needed to come over and borrow a cup of sugar.

"This is the fabled Toad Town!" Toadsworth boomed proudly, "Population three hundred and seven, soon to be three-oh-eight when Mrs. Mushroom gives birth! This is the heart of the Mushroom Kingdom: a town of happy citizens, clean streets and beautiful weather year round. Step this way, my good gents and ladies."

As we toured, Mario and Bowser were to be as far from each other as possible. Since this was the tour of Luigi's kingdom, he walked beside me, pointing out delicious restaurants and his favorite night clubs. The aroma of fresh bread wafted from the bakery in tantalizing coifs. My mouth watered as Wolfe brusquely stated, "Damn, that smells good!"

A baker Toad wheeled a food cart filled with freshly baked bread across our path. Luigi pulled my hand and we walked over, "They-a have some good-a bread! Best-a I've ever tasted!"

"Then let's eat," I smiled.

The baker was all smiles as our procession came through. "Top of the morning to ya! Princess Daisy welcome to Toad Town again! Not playing hooky again are ya?"

Toadsworth immediately shot a skeptical glare at me as the suitors wore varying amused grins. Bowser arched an eyebrow and grinned. I blushed, laughing nervously, "Uh…N-Not this time!"

"Right," he even winked playfully, "Once again, welcome back to Toad Town! The town where everyone's heart glows gold! Would you like some of our famous Toad Town butter bread? Begets perhaps?" He smiled, "For two hundred years it's been voted the best bread!"

Grammy hummed, "It does smell quite delicious."

"Best bread bar none!" He winked.

Suddenly, Peach's face tightened as she whirled to face Unc. "Father, you remembered to send the orator right? To let the citizenry know of our appearance, as well as King Bowser's visitation?"

"Right." Toadsworth chuckled, "Because it would be utter _mayhem_ if they didn't know of Lord Bowser's appearance."

Unc titled his head, "I was supposed to do _what_?"

Peach's eyes widened and Toadsworth stopped smiling. Wolfe doubled over and broke out laughing. Silver peered at Uncle as if he were mental; I don't blame him.

"Oh _bollocks_..." Toadsworth whispered with panic.

"How much for some of that bread?"

Bowser's shadow loomed over the Toad as the baker organized several types of baked goods on the counter in front of him. "My good sire! For a fair price of ten coins per loaf..."

The baker finally peered up and realized he was staring at a shelled torso. The Toad's eyes slowly traced their way up Bowser's frame until he met the blood-red eyes of the king. Bowser's wicked grin did little to quell the poor baker's rising fear. He even leaned forward and whispered, "_Boo_."

The baker shrieked shrilly, shoving himself away, arms wind-milling until he tripped over his stand. Bread went flying everywhere—one loaf conveniently flew into Bowser's awaiting hand—as the Toad continued to scream.

The distressed scream brought a hoard of Toads over in curious droves. They peered at us, then caught sight of—

"Buh..." A Toad trembled, "Buh...Buh! Buh-Buh-Buh-_Bowser_!"

Bowser arched an eyebrow at the gawking crowd. They were just gaping, watching him in dead silence. "Hmm..."

He raised his hand…

The Toads gasped, holding their breath, clutching their children...

Then Bowser lowered his hand.

Threat averted, they sighed in relief. Bowser smirked. He raised his hand and again, the townsfolk held their breaths...

Then he lowered it again. They sighed. He raised it again, received another gasp, and then dropped it. He repeated the cycle, making then gasp then sigh, then gasp then sigh like a game. Bowser raised his hand halfway...And half of the group was tricked into gasping. The tricked toads left the crowd; they knew the rules: only gasp when he raised his hand all the way; Bowser Says was an unforgiving game.

I peered at Bowser skeptically; _was he really turning this into a game_?! Uncle asked Peach if he could join in and play. Tired of the game, Bowser grinned darkly and clanked his teeth together with an audible snap. That pushed them over the proverbial edge. No. That was a kick to the rear over the proverbial edge. The assembled townsfolk were flung into a panic.

"Holy Staaaaaars! Run for your lives!"

"Fleeeeee!"

"Ruuuuuuuun!"

And then it was pandemonium. Toads were screaming, running around in droves. Some barricaded themselves in buildings, but most screamed and ran around like chickens with their heads off.

Wolfe laughed. "These little guys are tripping out!"

Silver moved aside otherwise a tiny Toad would have plowed into his leg, "Poor things…T-They're scared stupid."

"They _are _stupid," Taurus laughed.

One Toad tripped and fell near Ryu's boots. Ryu, being the chivalrous piece of sexy he was, bent down, helping the small Toad back to his feet. The Toad citizen nodded and gave a courteous thank you before resuming his blind running and screaming. Bowser continued to chomp on his free bread, taking in the chaos with glee.

"Bread! Get your bread!" The baker screamed frantically, waving his bread in the air, "Stock up now! Save your family! All yours for an inflated apocalyptic price of ten thousand coins!"

That made Bowser laugh. I hit his plastron with a dull thud. "Look what you did!"

"Tell me this isn't funny Flower! It's hilarious!"

Then after chewing another large bite, he generously offered the bitten end of the bread my way. He spoke with a full mouth, crumbs flying. "Wah sumf Fluwuh?"

I scrunched up my nose. "Er…Pass."

With an indifferent shrug, he continued to munch his looted bread.

Peach sighed tiredly, "We must do something."

Toadsworth bobbed his head, "Agreed princess."

She looked at Mario. "Would you be so kind as to lift me onto that crate of oranges?"

Mario tipped his hat respectfully and lifted her onto the crate with great ease. Peach cleared her throat daintily before releasing a powerfully girlish shriek. Her scream was so keening, it fluttered over the mayhem. The citizens slowed in their panic, one by one turning to look at her.

"I know that yell! It's the princess!"

"Princess Peach!"

The citizens gathered around the base of the box until the hushed whispers died away. All their fear vanished as they peered at her adoringly. _Wait. So did these people really forget about Bowser? They loved Peach that much!? These people are so damn screwy..._

"Greetings," she smiled, folding her hands properly, "It is with short notice I must inform you all of King Bowser's presence. As you all have noticed undoubtedly."

The Toads peered at one another. Then their gazes collectively turned towards Bowser. Bowser grinned and waved. That almost sent them spiraling into a panicked frenzy again. This time I stepped on his clawed toes and was rewarded with a growl of pain.

I could _feel _his baleful glare against the back of my head.

"Just to check that I haven't gone insane," a Toad with glasses said shakily, "so, you _know_ he's here your Daintiness?! And we're supposed to be _okay _with that?!"

"He's _King Bowser_!" A Toadette squealed, "He smashed my flower garden!"

"He threw a cow through my roof!"

"He was thrown through my garage and his...his posterior was stuck in my wall!"

"He drank all my milk!"

"He punched through my glass window!"

Peach gestured gracefully with a gloved hand, and the crowd's increasing murmurs went silent.

"Yes, I am completely aware he is present. And I am perfectly aware he has…" she paused thoughtfully, "wronged us all in some way," Peach peered at Bowser before turning to her citizens again, "And who would know that better than me?"

The citizens nodded thoughtfully.

"Please, I ask of you to set aside your judgments and fear. He is not here to kidnap or plunder our fair kingdom. He comes in peace."

Peach motioned towards Bowser as all eyes rested upon him. He returned their stares and crossed his arms. "Yeah Blondie—_Princess Peach_ is right."

"S-So we're safe?"

"Indeed." Peach nodded. "Even then we have both of the famous Mario Brothers present! So please go about your day! We will be only giving a tour of our fair city."

Reluctantly, the crowd dispersed, not as jovial and as chipper as before. Most toads gave Bowser a weary look or two. Some even pointedly walked past Mario and said things like, 'keep him in your sight!'

Peach smiled and winked at us. "Situation diffused, and not a hair out of place."

Mario leapt into action, eager to assist. He graciously helped Peach down the orange box, eyes aglow as he watched her step down with dainty elegance. I grinned. _Ooh, someone was paying Peachy at lot of attention! Bowchikabowow~!_

"Great!" Uncle smiled. For some odd reason, he spun around to speak to Bowser. "How about we play some b-ball? That's what you kids call basketball, right? Didn't think I was hip enough to know that, huh?"

He even feigned, pretending to dribble and play point guard against Bowser. The king Koopa gaped irritably, half stunned and half disturbed.

"I will take you, Bowz! I will take you _downtown!_"

I almost slapped my palm to my forehead for the second time that day. When Bowser's left eye began to twitch in a show of unraveling patience, the mushrooms leapt into action, pulling Unc away from him. Oddly enough, he just kept on smiling.

"You've dawdled long enough my king," Toadsworth harrumphed, "It's time to return to the palace. We shall see you later."

A couple of the Toads took Uncle by his elbows and wheeled him back to the castle. Uncle didn't understand he was being forcibly banished, and smiled happily, "See you later!"

I shook my head, grinning, "Bye Unc."

Grammy laughed, "That's my Apricotto…"

Peach sighed, "So. Let's begin the tour shall we?"

"The king's a crackpot," Wolfe smiled. "I like him!"

"He's a bit…quirky," Silver whispered.

Mario and Bowser moved forward at the same time and bumped shoulders. They looked at each other and growled, tensing up. Mario glowered as Bowser's ruthless smile grew cold, "After you, sire dipshit."

Mario's eyes narrowed then he suddenly smirked, "Oh no, I must insist-a. After you King Bowser."

Bowser huffed and smirked. "At least you _know _your place midget man. You—"

"_Ladies _first." Mario grinned.

Bowser was silent. Then grew so incensed he shook with anger and breathed a roll of fire, "Then you ought to go first _Maria_."

"I insist-a after you."

"I would kindly insist you kiss my royal scaly ass but even then that's a privilege you're not good enough to have!"

"Gentlemen." Peach stepped between them, a warning smile adorning her face. "Let's behave ourselves, shall we?"

Over my shoulder, I could hear the other suitors whispering amongst themselves.

"Do those bets still stand?" Wolfe asked Zero.

"Yes, why?"

"I want to change my bet," he grinned. "Fifty coins on Bowser."

Ryu rubbed his chin. "One hundred coins on Peach."

"What kind of a bet is that?" Taurus frowned.

Ryu grinned, "The best bet of all."

"I think I'll agree with R-Ryu. I wager ten on P-Princess Peach," Silver smiled.

Bowser glowered, eyes narrowed. "Then tell Pipesuck-o-Tron to watch the hell out. Or else his ass will be set aflame."

"Yeah? Tell-a that jumbo-sized-a Koopa to sleep with one eye-a open!"

"_Jumbo_?!" Bowser breathed, as if he was completely offended. "I'm going to choke you out!"

Mario laughed, "Got to-a catch-a me first, slowpoke."

Peach sighed, turning to Bowser. "King Bowser, would you like for me to tell everyone the _delightful _story about your sauna disaster at Nimbusland? Princess_ Daisy _would find it _hilarious,_ don't you think?"

Bowser gaped stupidly, sounding horribly betrayed. "You _wouldn't_."

"_Try me._"

Mario laughed, but then Peach turned to him, eyes sharp, "And you. Remember the time we went fishing? And Luigi's hook got caught in the _you-know-what_. Should I tell them the _what_?"

As Luigi laughed, Mario's trap snapped shut, his face flushing pink. Peach breathed impatiently, rubbing her temples. "Enough from the both of you. I will not tolerate such immaturity between the two of you. And you both have supplied me with a lifetime of hilarious blunders. Keep this up and our guests shall become privy to them."

Both of them fell silent. _Okay now I'm super curious; what was Bowser's sauna disaster?! _It sounded hilarious. Mario and Bowser glared at each other one last time before Mario moved to walk beside Peach. And as Mario marched past Bowser, they exchanged one last verbal blow.

"_Buttmunch_," Bowser growled under his breath.

"_Idiota_," Mario huffed back.

"Wow," Wolfe whispered to me, "Despite all that hair and pinkness she's scary!"

I laughed, "You should see her when she's mad."

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," Ryu laughed, "Now then, I think you all owe Prince Silver and I a few coins."

Wolfe grumbled, digging around for his coins as Zero simply handed over a bag. So, _finally_, we started the tour. Toadsworth gave a masterful summary and tour of Toad Town.

We visited the bakery once again and sampled delicious freshly-baked goods. Then, we went to the Grand Museum hall and learned of the Mushroom Kingdom's great historical triumphs and follies. And of course we had to see the famed Crystal Gardens.

"…And these are the luxurious, wondrous Crystal gardens." Toadsworth's voice carried a proud air as he spoke.

Though this wasn't exciting to me—I _did_ visit my cousin multiple times a year—the suitors ooh-ed and ah-ed. It was, as the name suggested, a garden sculpted entirely out of glass. There were glittering Toad statues frozen in various poses as they gleamed like diamond.

Some of the crystal structures were grazing fauna, elegant stags, and crystal swans. No, the big oafish animals were not to be included; _what the hell would a crystal piranha plant look like in the middle of a beautiful, green garden?_ It would be awkward and ungainly...

And as for the elegant garden's center piece? Why, it was the crystalline Princess Peach, who stared up at the sky longingly with big, sparkling opal eyes. I'd never say it to anyone who wasn't a dear friend, but it was quite obvious: Peach was vain as hell. Even now she had a rather impish grin as she studied her crystal form.

"It's marvelous isn't it?"

_Vain? Party of one. Vain?_

"Is all of this real crystal?" Wolfe asked, peering at a laughing Toad statue.

"Of course," Toadsworth half scoffed. "Now then, follow me and we shall see the Hall of Heroes! A place to honor the adventures and heroic legends!"

_Been in here millions of times too._ We entered the adjacent museum and there were glittering chrome statues of the Mushroom Kingdom's revered heroes. Many of them I didn't know, though I recognized Mario, Luigi, Toad and Yoshi's statues. Wolfe was reading a plaque on some 'Geno' character as Ryu peered at a 'Mallow.'

"He hails from Nimbusland, is eccentric and when licked is likened to the taste of...marshmallows?"

"Marshmallow?" Wolfe laughed.

One exhibit I noticed had a strange-looking tiny statue. I picked up a weird looking animal with a lolling tongue, "What is this?"

"It's a miniature Belome replica," Peach replied, "He was a villain we trampled. To attack he used to lick and…eat people."

I laughed; I don't think Peach could have said that in a dignified manner.

"He used to lick people and say what they taste like-a." Mario grinned.

"Interesting and really creepy," I turned to Wolfe and stuck the doll in his face. "Give Belome a kissy_!_"I altered my voice to a comical, unsexy manly tone.

"Ah! Help!" He laughed.

The doll's tongue touched his face. "_Argh! Tastes like mud! Patooie! Patooie!_"

We both froze and then I boomed with laughter. Wolfe looked offended. "Well, up yours too, Belome!"

"He said you tasted nasty!" I laughed.

"P-Princess Peach did s-say Belome licked his opponents…" Silver whispered.

"And tasted them? _Creeepy_."

Then I turned Belome on Silver. He squawked as the strange creature's tongue lapped at his cheek, "_Hmm. Tastes minty..."_

While Wolfe explained Belome to a curious Ryu, I looked at Bowser. "Did Belome lick you?"

He snorted and crossed his arms. "Is he still living now? No. There's your answer. No one licks _the King _and lives to tell about it."

He grinned, "But I'll happily make an exception for you. Go ahead and plant a wet one on Big Daddy."

I grimaced. "No thanks _Big Daddy_."

"Princess," Wolfe laughed, "Belome wants to meet you!"

"I'll pass!" I laughed.

The suitors had devious expressions. I didn't like it. "After shoving that weird thing in our faces, did you think we'll let you get away with it?"

I spun to get away, but a hand grabbed my shoulder. It was Bowser. "You traitor," I gasped.

Bowser laughed, "Sorry Flower."

The Belome doll was removed from my hand and Wolfe gleefully pressed the doll's snout against my cheek. I laughed as it tickled my face, Belome purred thoughtfully, "_Sweet yet tart...Tastes like raspberries._"

Bowser laughed, "I always thought Belome was a freak show but I guess we both agree what you tas—"

"Daisy? Princess Daisy!?"

Standing in the hall of heroes was none other than Toad. _The _Toad; the most famous of the toadstools who sometimes traveled with the Mario brothers in their adventures. He was our friend, and companion who wore his iconic blue vest as the red spots shone on his cap.

Toad blinked, before hurriedly discarding a mop he had been previously pushing. The small toadstool scampered over, smiling, "Hey! Luigi! Daisy! Welcome back!"

I beamed. "Toad, hi! What are you doing here?"

He snorted. "I got detention because I fell asleep in Toadsworth's _lame, _sucky diplomat class. I wish he'd realize how badly it su—"

There was a loud harrumph as the elderly Toad suddenly appeared, glaring his disapproval. Toad looked like a kicked puppy as he muttered, "_Mommy_…"

"_Master Toad_, you are here for your _disparaging _attitude towards our historical diplomatic class," Toadsworth glowered, "I hoped you would learn to appreciate culture by spending an afternoon in the hall. Perhaps additional days are required…"

Toad laughed nervously, "Uh o-of course sire…Say! Is that Toad kid running down the hall!?"

Toadsworth looked scandalized, turning to find the rule-breaker, "Who is running!? They will serve many a detention!"

Once Toad was sure he was safe, he turned back to us with a sly grin, "Works _every_ time. So what are you here for? Ditching class again, D?"

Wolfe laughed, "That's the second time someone said that."

Grammy raised both eyebrows, "Should I be worried you're not learning, _Pichi?"_

I blushed as Silver and Ryu laughed. _Crap. There goes my reputation_.

_Again._

"I'm here, _Toad,_ because I'm visiting Luigi's kingdom," I sighed.

Toad didn't quite understand, since I've been here a bajillion times before, but pretended to. "Oh okay. Interesting bunch of los—er _suitors _you got here," he laughed. "They all look nice and—"

Toad froze when he saw Bowser. Just as the king turned to look his way, Toad reanimated, "H-Ha! It's a good thing I know that when you stare a Koopa in the face..."

He stepped up until he was arms-length away, "He will turn away!"

Peach appeared worried, "Uh, Toad?"

Toad laughed, peering up at Bowser who arched a red eyebrow, "What a big, fat meanie! I hope Mario will kick his _butt _all the way back to the stinky, smelly keep! That awful, sucky keep is mold infestation city!"

"_Toad_..." Peach tried again, her voice taut.

"Mario I hope you kick his ugly shell around like a soccer ball!" Toad laughed, missing the unpropitious way Bowser's eyes narrowed.

I started to laugh as Peach whispered to her friend, "Um, Toad. Boos get shy when stared at..._Not _Koopas."

Toad blinked, gob smacked, "They don't?"

"No," she whispered back, distress on her face as Mario scratched his head. Toad paused; it looked like his blunder was finally sinking in.

"So when I talked all that smack...I...Oh. _Oh crap_..."

When he turned around, he nearly bumped into Bowser's snout. They couldn't have been inches apart as Toad gaped into the fire-red eyes of the evil dictator. "_What_ were you saying, you little fungal infection?" He glowered victoriously, a cold smile stretching across his face.

Toad grew pale before he shrieked, diving behind Mario as a shield, "_Aaaaah_! Save us! Slay the ugly, fat dragon!"

Bowser paused, "Fat? _Ugly?_! Why _you_…! You're about to earn yourself a pounding, you bratty little toe fungus! I am _intimidating-ly gorgeous _and a specimen of masculine beauty! Looking at me is enough to give most people erotic fantasies!"

Mario stared with disbelief as I continued to laugh. Peach's face remained stoic in slight shock as she blinked several times. But Bowser wasn't done.

As Toad frowned, continuing to hide behind Mario, the Koopa king continued his monologue. "I knew things were bad here, but not this bad. Clearly the people of the Mushroom Kingdom are blind as well as brazenly _stupid_!"

"Bowser. Enough," Mario replied coolly.

But did Bowser take orders? Especially if they were from Mario?

"Kiss my crack, toilet titan!"

Of course not.

"I hope you give him what for Mario!" Toad cheered, "He's a fat jerk!"

Bowser snarled, brandishing a fist, "Bratty-ass kid. I'm gonna…I'm gonna throw you in time-out so hard, your eyeballs will pop out!"

Toad whimpered, moving closer to Mario. Peach intervened, "That's enough! Both of you!"

Mario and Bowser were glaring at each other heatedly. I thought Peach was going to grab Mario as usual, but this time she signaled she wanted to speak with Bowser alone. I shrugged and headed off after the others.

* * *

><p>Toad wisely stayed beside Mario, casting glances at Bowser. When the two caught eyes again, Toad stuck out his tongue. Bowser sneered, ready to make good on his threat.<p>

_Bratty ass little…Brat._

While the others were looking around, someone had the audacity to tap him on the shoulder. Shoulder-tapping was peasantry; _no one _trapped a king on his shoulder. Bowser turned around with a sneer, smoke wafting from his teeth and saw Peach peering up at him. His anger went from an eight to a four as his chevalier thoughts kicked in like AC; had she been a dude, she would have been knocked the hell out.

"Whaddiya want, Blondie-Cakes?" He grunted, tension visibly uncoiling.

She ignored the snub like a champ. "Bowser, to be blunt I have realized you are in love with my cousin."

And with _that_ bomb dropped, he decided to give her his undivided attention. She preened, pink lips pulled into an unusually smug smile.

"Lies." To his credit, the only telltale anxiety was a bead of sweat rolling down the side of his face.

She arched a manicured brow, "Should I spell it out? With the all too obvious lingering stares, the way you look at her when she isn't watching and of course the way you _crudely _ogle her. If that isn't attraction then I'm afraid I've been had."

Still stunned, he remained quiet, eyes narrowed critically as Princess Pink-Freak continued. "Then there's the way your eyes soften when she looks at you, your tail wags for a split second before you hide it, and anytime she laughs, you ground your jaw to avoid smiling. _Must_ I _continue_?"

Peach's smile grew to alarmingly devious levels. _Well,_ Bowser thought, _at least she learned something from all those years of me kidnapping her._ _Damn, Blondie-Cakes was good_.

He thought he was subtle but Peach snipped him like it was personal. Maybe behind all that hair and a pretty face was a sharp, analytical mind. _So then...if she's so smart why was she so easy to kidnap? Better yet when did she get the balls to say this?!_ Peach had always seemed so passive and delicate.

_Like Flower's opposite._

Peach may know his feelings but Bowser was not going to give her the satisfaction of being caught off guard. He even smirked, "And? What's your point Blondie-Cakes? Anyone with eyes can see she's hotter than the Dry Dry Desert. Who wouldn't want a romp in the sack with _that_?"

Peach's face tightened, causing Bowser's eyes to widen slightly. "You don't fool me. You genuinely like her. Do you think I didn't notice how you tried to kiss her during the _Summani_? Or how you carried her after the Superstriker game? You stared at her like she was the only girl in the world."

Bowser shifted uneasily; he didn't like the idea of being transparent. The _last _thing he wanted were his rivals knowing about his sappy, gushy feelings for a girl. _That ugly plumber would rip me a new one if he knew I had a thing for Flower..._

Peach replied, "No, Mario doesn't know about this."

He peered at her questioning, squinting even, "Are you psychic? Does wearing all pink give you mystical power or something?"

"I'm quite efficient at reading others," she smiled. "Look. You need to cool it down a bit. We _are _her closest friends and kin. If you want to win her, you can't do so by fighting with her friends. Be _nice_."

Repulsed, Bowser drew away from her as if she had mumps, "Don't fight with Mario? Yeah okay_, not_! I've considered kicking his ass every twelve seconds I've been here."

Peach crossed her arms. "If you want to win my cousin, it's going to be easier if her friends are on your side. Think about it; who influences her more than us?"

Blondie-Cakes had a good point. Maybe if she put the idea in Daisy's ear how masculine and sexy he was, she'd finally take notice.

And try to take advantage of his studly bod.

A Koopa could only dream right?

"Why do you want to help me? I've been kidnapping you since you were a baby," Bowser frowned.

Peach examined him critically, as if trying to peer deeper into him.

"Staring that hard won't give you x-ray vision, toots." He even sealed it with a wink.

Peach looked amused, "If anyone needs stronger sight, I'm afraid it's you, since you're stuck in the purgatory of the _friend zone_ but can't find your way out of it."

Bowser stopped smiling. _Ouch. _He had been burned by Peach of all people. _Peach_. He hated the 'friend zone'. He had never been in the friend zone ever. He was always 'that sexy Koopa King' not 'the best friend who couldn't get any.'

_Damn it._

Peach patted his shoulder. "Play nice with the other children in the schoolyard and I'll tell the girl of your dreams nothing but good things, okay?"

He growled, "Fine. But the second Mario looks at me funny..."

"You will smile at him," Peach sounded like she wanted to laugh, "and when I see you smiling, I will talk to Marmar."

Both eyebrows rose, "Marmar? Stars that's gross..."

"And Bowwy isn't?"

Bowser froze. A mixture of anger and embarrassment roiled in his gut. _Sonnovagun, Flower told her about that lame nickname? That sexy little traitor_! His thrashing tail nearly dented the floor as he growled; he was going to make her pay in the worst way he knew how. He was going to embarrass the hell out of her. Or maybe lick her to death, it sounded delicious.

"Bowser, no one will know of your nickname, I think it's cute."

"Call me it and _die_," he growled. Then he thought about it again, "Okay, I won't kill you…But I will smack Mario through a wall. Then sit on him."

"So you promise to play nice?" She beamed.

He groaned, rolling his eyes. "Ugh. I'll do it. I won't...try to kill him."

Peach patted his shoulder. "Now come on. We have to go."

"Where are we headed now?" he grunted.

"To the Pipe house," Peach beamed.

Bowser froze; he was going to Mario's house?

* * *

><p>Next stop on the list was the infamous Pipehouse, the humble abode of the universe's two most famous brothers. It was a simple one-story house with homey red-tiles and a worn welcome mat. I couldn't quite place why, but walking up to its door just brought a broad smile to my face.<p>

We entered the pipehouse and it was quite homey. The decor was simple and comfortable: two well-used couches, a matching rug, an opened newspaper discarded on the wooden coffee table. This place screamed bachelor pad.

"Come on-a we're gonna have a huge-a lunch," Luigi smiled.

"I should really watch my sodium intake," Toadsworth hummed, curling his mustache thoughtfully, "but Master Luigi does make delicious meals…"

"His cooking is awesome sauce!" Toad exclaimed gleefully.

We entered the kitchen and immediately he set to work, chopping onions and dicing fresh produce with impressive zeal. Luigi moved around the kitchen like magic! He threw shortening into a pan and sautéed the ingredients. Within half an hour he had a dish baking in the oven and it smelt divine.

Lulu had been magnanimous enough to teach the suitors—those willing to learn—how to cook. Wolfe was put to work stirring the savory sauce and making sure it didn't burn. Ryu diced the ingredients with as much skill as a chef whereas Silver and Toad peeled and washed fresh vegetables.

Zero and Taurus felt little need to cook and though they didn't outright say it, I knew it was because they believed it was below their station. As Silver put a second dish into the oven, I called Luigi over.

"How did you become such a good cook?"

"_Mi mamma _taught me," Luigi smiled. "She-a cooked the best-a meals. Mario never liked cooking, only eating-a , so she taught me everything-a she knew. She taught me the recipes of _Nonna. _My-a grandmother."

I smiled at him, "I wish my mom had been around to teach me things."

Luigi froze, his face flooding with sympathy, "Daisy…"

Peach even stopped sipping her glass of cherry Italian soda. The kitchen grew a bit more silent as the boys peered at me compassionately. I wasn't going to let them ruin the mood.

"Oh stop it. It's not even a big deal. Just keep cooking so I can try your delicious food!" I exclaimed.

"Yes," Peach smiled, "It smells delicious. Maybe Daisy should _help._"

"Yeah," Mario grinned, peering at Luigi, "_Daisy _should help."

Mario coughed and Peach cleared her throat. It was obvious they were trying to communicate to Luigi; _they were egging him on_. Luigi flushed beet-red, "W-Would you like to uh…S-Stir the pasta?"

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Sure."

I walked over to the stove, took the spoon and began to stir the thick noodles. Mario 'sneezed' as Peach 'coughed.' Luigi slowly moved behind me and guided my hand, "S-Stir like this-a."

From the peripheral of my vision I could see Mario and Peach share a knowing grin. I continued to play oblivious to their matchmaking. Grammy tittered softly, shaking her head. Luigi's coaching was starting to draw the others' attention.

Peach quickly intervened, "Gentlemen, as this is the Mushroom Kingdom tour, Toadsworth would now share how he came to serve as my father's chancellor. If you will Toadsworth?"

"Well," the old Toad cleared his throat, "It started forty years ago when I was but a young, strapping lad! I was sharp and brave, and full of—"

Wolfe groaned, burying his face in his palms, "_Shoot me._"

Peach peered at Luigi and winked; that whole story was a distraction so we wouldn't be bothered.

"You're doing great-a," Luigi spoke softly.

"Lulu! Better watch those wandering hands eh?" I wiggled my eyebrows, grinning at him.

I laughed as he spluttered, face glowing red. Luigi quickly moved his hands from my waist to the platonic region of my shoulders.

* * *

><p>Bowser guffawed, rubbing his claws together as he surveyed the scene<em>. Can't believe that dumb plumber left me alone. That Red plumber is so...dumb<em>. He saw the toilet and sneered; never would he _soil _himself by using a toilet Mario's bare ass touched. Besides Mario was..._weird_. He might have cameras and..._stuff_ in here.

_I bet that little red freak does have cameras up in here. Wouldn't be surprised if he was into some reaaaaal freaky shit..._

Bowser glowered at the porcleain throne; nope, he wouldn't touch that thing. Even then his masculine weight would probably crush 'Marmar's' toilet; funny mental picture. Despite its owner being evil, Mario's bathroom looked rather normal; blue curtains with rubbery ducky patterns, matching blue rugs and a stack of supplied reading material.

There even was a happy plastic rubber ducky sitting on the porcelain tub. Bowser sneered; _what kind of grown men had an actual rubber ducky_?! His eyes narrowed in disgust; these sick bastards. He knew the resting place of the infamous, bastardly Mario would be..._unholy_. _Reeking _of evil.

He raised a massive meaty fist above the rubber ducky's head...

_Your reign of rubbery tyranny ends now, pond scum!_

Then a huge fist slammed upon the rubber ducky's head with a furious roar. It expanded grotesquely and made a gnarly sound akin to a whoopee cushion being sat on. Bowser laughed with glee; it sounded like a fart!

Well, it's time to get revenge on the red idiot. Bowser loaded up armfuls of toilet paper and stuffed it into the toilet bowl and since he was a_ generous _king, he also threw in extra goodies like towels, clothes from the hamper and then that damn squished rubber duck from hell was the cherry on the sundae.

Proud, he stepped back to admire his towering masterpiece of disaster. _If only I thought to bring a camera along..._

_Oh well..._

Beefy, massive claws wrapped the silver handle with reverence._ This I do, not just for myself, but for all of my fellow countrymen, my fellow Koopa who wish Mario would just fall off the surface of the world. _Feeling patriotic, the king even began to hum the Darklandian national anthem as he rapidly jiggled the handle.

This was the philosophical lighting of the fuse. He laughed, flushing repeatedly as he listened to the sick splutter of the full toilet. His vicious grin grew as the toilet gurgled ominously, pipes moaning and backing up.

_That's right, pipes! Back up! Back up! Backity, backity, back up!_

With one last flush, the sluggish sound of churning water alerted the king that his job here was done. But then he caught sight of the laundry basket_. I don't like the looks of things here. I bet these plumber perverts have Peach's panties hidden away here._

He growled, mane bristling at the thought of Mario; _what if that perv stole some of Flower's panties?! I know Greenstache is sweet on Flower and Mario probably influenced him for evil pervertry. Pervertry? That's some Star damn funny shit right there. Ah, yeah. That's a new awesome word I made up. Hmm. I'd better check and make sure he didn't take anything of hers. And if he did...I'll confiscate them for...shall we say, 'investigative purposes.'_

Bowser ripped open their hamper and dug through it manically, chucking clothes left and right with little care. At the bottom he found a neatly tied up bag. _Hmm? What's this? Heh, just as I thought. Randy pervs._

But before he left, as he walked past the mirror, he walked in reverse for a few steps and peered at his reflection. Bowser smoothed back his mane into its usual rugged, wild pattern. _Gotta look sharp for Flower, can't have her thinking I'm a barbarian, now can we?_

Bowser entered the quarters peasants referred to as the 'living room' and Mario, who happened to walk by, shot a suspicious glare in his direction. Blue eyes narrowed. "You look like-a you're up to something..."

A vicious smile unfurled, "I left a s_urprise_ in the bathroom."

Mario visibly turned green. "Mama Mia...I knew-a you were a monster but you are-a _nasty!"_

"No. I mean I clogged your toilet."

"I bet you did!" Mario was turning greener and greener.

Bowser drew back, quite offended. This plumber thought that he, King Bowser of the infamous Darklands, would use his facilities?! He wouldn't use Mario's porcelain throne even if Flower offered to lick his face as reparation!

...Yeah okay so that's a lie; he'd hop on that john so damn fast it'd probably break. Bowser sneered, "No! Your toilet is not even close to being good enough to touch my ass!"

The house rattled uneasily as Mario frowned. "What was-a that?!"

Bowser grinned, "I'd check the bathroom before you get one nasty situation on your hands there."

Mario barreled past Bowser and screamed. But it couldn't have been a girly shriek because he was the hero who had battled a savage, gigantic Koopa king his whole life.

"Mama Mia! What is-a all of this?!"

Bowser grinned. He headed into the peasant kitchen where the losers, Flower, Grammy, and Blondie-Cakes were eating. Grammy peered up, "King Bowser, come on! We saved a plate—"

"Flower!" Bowser boomed.

Daisy peered up dubiously, whether it was because of the lack of formality, it was unknown. "...King Bowser?"

"These guys," Bowser pointed at Mario, who just returned, "are pervs!"

The soft clattering of utensils stopped as the environment grew deathly silent. The albino even choked on his food for a second. Dog Boy, who gaped dumbly, had food dribbling out of the side of mouth; why was Flower stuck with such losers?

Daisy narrowed her eyes. "What are you talking about?!"

Luigi looked stunned as Mario suddenly appeared. He was cursing in Italian. "What is it now?!"

Bowser grinned, "You're not the goody-goody hero everyone thinks! You're a dirty ole pervert! And you'd been found out, midget."

Mario remained cool, eyes narrowing just the slightest bit, "What are you-a even talking about?!"

"Here's my proof." with an evil grin, Bowser held up a pair of old-fashioned floral bloomers, "What kinda guy would have these?! Huh? That's right! A perv!"

* * *

><p><em>What in the world is Bowwy doing!?<em>

If the boys were stunned before, it was twice as bad now. Ryu was polite enough to look away and Wolfe was the direct opposite, ogling. Silver blushed as Taurus looked disturbed. Peach gaped, dropping her fork inelegantly. I hope I was wrong, but Toadsworth looked _very _interested, even pulling down his glasses.

"Are...those yours?" Zero asked slowly peering at me with an arched eyebrow.

All heads snapped my way. I blushed flagrantly. "N-No way!"

Mario looked furious, gloves curled into fists, "Those are Mama Mario's...My-a _mother_…"

"Oh dear…" Toadsworth whispered.

Toad laughed nervously, moving as far from Bowser as possible. Mario looked furious, his level temperament slowly slipping away.

_Wow, good move Bowwy_.

Then there was silence. Until Bowser made a loud, obnoxious gagging noise as he threw the bloomers away as if they contained the plague. And then he threw them into the air, shot a rapid string of fireballs and incinerated them.

He stared at his hands as they trembled from great strain.

"I have removed a great evil from this world today..." He whispered.

I covered my mouth to hold back the laughter. Wolfe exploded into peels of laughter as Grammy chuckled. Peach remained silent, as if not quite sure what to say.

"Oh Stars!" Bowser roared, deeply distressed, "I...touched no held, Mario's mother's undies...I need to_ bleach_ my hands."

"That's-a it!" Mario snarled, eyes blazing as if in the possession of a fire flower, "I'm-a gonna kick-a your ass!"

"M-Mario," Peach seemed genuinely worried, "Let's not be irrational…"

While Bowser was still 'retching' something under the flooring groaned. I looked around. "What was that?!"

"It sounded like it came from under the house," Zero replied.

"We should have never trusted such poor accommodations," Taurus sighed.

Mario glared as Bowser laughed. "By the way, you might wanna take a look at your bathroom."

I stared, "What did you _do_?!"

"Maybe, just maybe I clogged their toilet?"

Peach and Toad exchanged anxious glances. I was so mad, so furious I could have shot lasers from my eyes. "You did _what?_!"

Suddenly, there was an audible groan underneath the house and then there was a gurgle of water bubbling from the sinks. The suitors rose from their seats hurriedly as Luigi shrieked.

"M-My lunch!" Luigi moaned in dismay.

"Retreat!" Wolfe boomed, grabbing the lasagna, "And save the ricotta!"

Silver and Ryu had enough sense and manner to help Grammy to her feet. Toadsworth gently prodded Peach to the exit as Ryu smoothly lifted Grammy into his arms, "My apologies but we should leave."

"Oh! And here I thought you were trying to sweep me off my feet, young man!" Grammy laughed.

I wasn't waiting around to find out what was going on. A backed up system was messy and dirty. But I was furious at Bowser, who was glowing with mirthful pride.

* * *

><p>"Oh come on Flower! You're still not mad are you?!"<p>

"..."

"I didn't mean to—okay I _did _mean to clog their toilet," he laughed, "You don't think it was the tiniest bit funny?"

"..."

"Oh _come oooooon_! Quit ignoring me! It's driving me crazy! The more you ignore, the more desperate I get for attention..."

"..."

"Flower. Flooooower. Flowerrrrr. Daisy. Daaaaaisy. Hottie. Long legs. Sakuro's daughter. Meringue's granddaughter. Peach's cousin. Firefly's owner. Junior's mother."

"..."

There was a poke to my shoulder. Then a second. I glowered as he prodded my arm. Even though I was staring straight ahead, I could see his face was inches away. His tail slowly rubbed against my leg.

I sucked my teeth, clenching my knuckles.

His tail coiled under the hem of my dress and slowly began to lift. The hem was knee-level and rising when I gasped._ Was that giant shelled jerk trying to l-lift my dress!?_ My cheeks flushed red with indignation as I slapped the offending appendage and glared at him incredulously. "Hey! W-What the heck?! I-If you try that again I'll _pound _you!"

"Knew I'd get you to talk," he smirked.

"You're incorrigible!"

"Why, thank you."

"That's a bad thing!" I was upset. I was _not_ going to laugh.

"So, are you really going to be mad over this?" He groaned.

"You flooded their house!" I growled, "they were courteous and let you into their home, cooked lunch, and that's how you repaid them?!"

"They weren't courteous, Mario was mugging me the whole time, and they only made lunch for you, I just _happened_ to be there."

"That doesn't change how rude you were!" I glared at him disbelievingly, "Flood their house..._really_?! And then the underwear thing?"

"I was trying to protect you from dirty plumber perverts."

He sounded honest. He _actually_ believed that. I rubbed my temple, "_If _you apologize to Luigi and Mario..."

His eyes glowed, "You won't be mad anymore?"

"I'll be less angry."

"Then I won't do it."

"Then I'll ignore you _again_." I snapped.

"Did I ever tell you about the first time I broke a headboard? It was during some really, really dastardly sex and—"

"Okay!" I laughed, "I won't be mad if you apologize!"

He smirked. "That's what I thought."

He groaned, languidly peering towards the Mario Brothers. They had finally finished draining the house, fixed the busted pipes and were completely filthy. Luigi rubbed his forehead, unknowingly smearing mud across his face. By the time they had finished it was grazing into late afternoon.

"I replaced a couple of pipes and turned off-a the water," Mario spoke.

Luigi laughed, "Good-a thing we're a plumbers, eh bro? This could-a been a nightmare."

Mario, despite the foul temperament, smirked. "I guess. But do you know-a what that Koopa put in the pipes-a?! He shoved in-a towels! _Towels!_"

Luigi's shoulders sank. "I wish my-a lunch wasn't ruined…I tried so hard-a to impress Daisy."

Surprisingly Bowser looked sheepish. "I better get this over with before I come to my damn senses and change my mind."

When he cast his eyes towards me, begging for mercy, I arched an eyebrow and made a shoo-ing motion. Bowser rolled his head about the axis of neck, bones shifting and popping.

He glared at the two plumbers and scratched at the back of his neck irritably. He growled, snorting a clot of smoke as he ambled over, "Hey. Luigi and Moron."

Unsurprisingly, Mario glared as Luigi blinked. Bowser sighed, unconsciously breathing a roll of dark smoke in tandem. "Look...sorry..."

He grimaced as if speaking the words were physically painful, "For...flooding your house."

The other conversations died away as silence congealed. There were raised eyebrows and dropped jaws all around;_ Bowser_ had apologized to _Mario._ Grammy smiled, nodding approvingly as a slow smile unfurled on Peach's pink lips.

Mario appeared surprised. He glanced at Luigi who smiled, "See? I told-a you, bro. He's a good guy now-a! He's-a one of us."

Mario sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose, "Just 'cause he hasn't-a kidnapped Miss-a Peach doesn't-a mean he's changed."

"Yeah! He's-a good now," Luigi nodded his head. "I told-a you how he helped those crazy Canine folk. Give him a chance, big-a bro."

Bowser gave Lulu a thumbs-up. "Sorry for flooding your house, Greenstache. It was to get at Moro—Mario."

Luigi nodded his head, "I figured. We're 'wingmen' now."

Mario looked at his brother skeptically, "You're-a what!?"

"Give him a chance," Luigi nodded, "If we're-a gonna be friends now-a, we should start a-new."

Peach approached, placing a placating hand on Mario's shoulder, "Let's start afresh Mario. What say you?"

And then something extraordinary happened. Bowser and Mario met stares. The red plumber stared discerningly, analyzing as Bowser glared, eyes narrowing. They were both tense, frozen under the sheer cold of the other's stare.

Then Mario's glare morphed into a small smile as he barely nodded his head. Wearily, Bowser drew back, "It's-a fine. So long as you don't-a try anything _else_-a dumb."

_WHAAAAAAAT?_

Was that acceptance? It must have been because seconds later a sharp grin split Bowser's face. "You probably should thank me. My renovations made your dump look better."

For now, that was probably as cordial as they were going to get. After years of a bitter rivalry they weren't going to 'kiss and make up,' they were going to take sarcastic jabs at worst and begrudging hold respect for each other at best. Peach peered at me with a smile. Before turning to the others, she spoke. "Lunch may have been ruined but I think we can still have a fine dinner. I've got an idea."

"What is it, milady?" Toadsworth beseeched, "How could we possibly salvage such disaster!?"

Peach grinned, "Just trust me."

* * *

><p>With the Pipehouse's unexpected flood, Peach adapted on the spot and, with the help of her loyal servants, she had her staff prepare dinner for the suitors and a secluded romantic spot for Luigi and I. So while sunset faded into dying oranges and reds, I prepared for my evening in Peach's chambers.<p>

I rummaged through a spare suitcase, peering at expensive dresses and beautiful evening gowns. I had known Luigi since babyhood, so was dressing up really necessary? Peach seemed to think so.

"Yes you need to dress your best." She didn't quite snarl her words. "You will spend a nice romantic evening with Luigi! And it will disenfranchise him if you do not dress your best."

"I don't want to wear any of those dresses!" I groaned. "They're uncomfortable and completely over the top."

"Then it's settled! I'm going to do you up myself," Peach declared with a smile, "Now sit on the stool."

"Peach I'm not—"

"_Sit."_

She was smiling beautifully and yet her eyes flashed dangerously. I shook my head, "You have issues, P."

"Only because you bring them to life. Now relax. This is so nice to see you again! It's just like the old days isn't it? With you, me, Mario and Luigi. It reminds me of our childhood…"

I sank into the seat as Peach hovered over me. She toyed with my hair, smiling at my reflection. "Green eye shadow would go lovely with your complexion. It reminds me of mocha. And how about charcoal eyeliner? Your eyes will shimmer like stars!"

"Peach," I sighed so deeply my shoulders sank, "I appreciate what you're doing but you don't have to—"

"Remember when Uncle Sakuro took us boating?" She chirruped sweetly, but her nails dug into my shoulders, "We were thirteen and saw the cheep-cheep. It was tropical and pretty."

I fell silent, dread filling me. She continued to gently brush through my hair.

"You fell off the boat," she was laughing, "how, I'll never know but when you surfaced your dress was completely see-through. The star print was really cute on your—"

"_Fine_!" I half-shrieked, "Just do whatever and don't tell anyone about that. _Ever_."

Peach: princess of the Mushroom Kingdom, queen of blackmail. She smirked, "Glad you see things my way."

"Evil woman."

"Ah!" She raised her index finger, "Princess Evil Woman."

I chuckled dryly. "Yeah 'cause that's much better."

So for the next half hour or so, I sat as Peach fixed my hair and makeup, laughing and sharing girlish tales about our childhood, boys, and her adventures with Mario. Peach leaned over my shoulder, blue eyes twinkling impishly. Her face was nearly next to mine. "So when were you going to tell me about Bowser?"

I blinked owlishly at the odd question. "What do you mean?"

"It's obvious," she was still smiling, "that there's something going on between you two. He's all but always staring at you."

"He is!?"

"He watches you." Peach smirked. "I think it's sweet."

"He watches me?" I frowned. "Should I beat his brains out? I have my ways to deal with pervs and weirdoes—"

"Not like that!" She tittered sweetly. "Yes he watches you, but it's more like...Hmm, how to say it? He admires you! There! He watches with admiration."

I squirmed. "Are you sure?"

"Positive. It's strange, it's his eyes. They are...softer, you know what I mean?"

I fell silent as Peach continued to brush my hair. What made her think Bowser liked me? Grammy said he loved me and now Peach was hinting at it. Even _Zero_ mentioned it. Such thoughts made me shift uneasily; they wouldn't make up things like that.

"Hold still," she sing-sang, "Adding mascara!"

For the remainder of our time together I let the beautician of blackmail work her magic. Peach flat-ironed my hair straight and spritzed some kind of fruity-smelling hair spray.

She went into her personalized walk-in closet that was ostentatious enough to double over as a spare bedroom. The shelves were white and trimmed with hand-painted dainty hearts and the carpet was her favorite shade of pastel pink. Peach moved towards the back with an eager smile and threw several dresses aside.

She pulled out a box and turned to face me. "I bought this with you in mind. It will look ravishing."

I peeled the box open, shoved through the purple tissue paper and pulled out a sleek ebony dress. It was simple, elegant and pretty, she found a dress I—the tomboy—_liked._

"And now my dear," Peach preened, flipping her hair back girlishly, "they eat out the palm of your hand."

* * *

><p>I stepped out of my cousin's bedchambers anxiously, peering around. The form-fitting black dress hugged all the right areas and ended above my knees. Peach had enough foresight to choose heels I could walk in. And before leaving, she adorned me with her favorite smell; Cocoabana.<p>

The clacking of my heels echoed through the corridors as I approached the dining hall. The soft murmur of conversation flowed from the room and into the hallways. I wrapped on the door thrice and Peach appeared as if she had been hovering nearby; which she probably had been.

Peach's entire face glowed, "Simply beautiful."

Surprisingly Uncle materialized besides Peach, "Oh Peachy dear! We're starting to run low on those dri—"

He paused, realizing I was present "_Whoa-ho_! You look marvelous!"

"Thank you Unc…"

"Oh my _Stars_! Oh. My. _Stars_. I can see your _figure_!" He whispered, sounding scandalized.

"_Uncle_!" I laughed as blood rushed to my face.

"My Stars when...when did you get _these_?! Where did these womanly curves come from?!" Uncle gasped. "One moment you're a smiling cute little girl and now here's a gorgeous young lady. When did this all happen?!" He gestured frantically to pretty much all of me.

"Unc!" I half-laughed-half-groaned.

Unc turned, peered in the direction of my suitors and then he shrieked. He rushed back to me. "You can't go out there! There are _boys_! And...They will see your_ body_!" He whispered loudly.

Yeah, Uncle wasn't being as discreet as he thought he was. If Bowser's around that corner bend then I'm sure he's hearing all of this. Peach groaned, "_Daddy_!"

"You need a jacket! There are beasts!" He hurriedly removed his fur jacket and placed it over my shoulders, "_Hormonal young_ beasts present!"

Though he was barely visible from where we stood, I saw Ryu arch a brow. Uncle fumbled as he tore off his outer jacket and threw his coat over me. "_Don't look at her!"_

If anything that _made _them look my direction with stronger intent.

"Daddy!" Peach huffed. "Enough. She looks just fine!"

I half choked and half laughed, "Uncle! Give it a rest!"

Grammy approached and smiled, "I came to see what the commotion was and—_Pichi! _You look wondrous!"

"Thank you Grammy."

Uncle was still pouting, lips pooched. "I don't see how Sakuro didn't want to kick their butts! I swear if they _drool…_"

Peach smiled. "Go ahead and walk in. Luigi is waiting for you and has been sweating buckets. Go easy on him, alright?"

While Uncle squabbled with Peach, I entered and unsurprisingly their undivided attention was focused on me. I'm sure Uncle's stunts more than attracted their attention. I smiled as Luigi rose to his feet.

"_Mama mia_," he whispered, removing his hat.

Mario smiled, nodding his head approvingly as the other suitors stared. As the other suitors smiled, Peach's words chimed; _there's something going on between you two. He's all but always staring at you._

I chanced a peek at Bowser and he was indeed staring. He blinked, realizing I was observing him. He half grinned and mouthed, 'Smoldering.'

'Thanks,' I mouthed back.

All good-natured charm fled the moment Luigi stood beside me. He took my hand, "_Ciao bella_. Ready to go on our-a date?"

"Yes Lulu."

And then he kissed my fingers. Peach and Mario glowed as the Toads shared secretive smiles. From the corner of my vision I could see Mario and Peach coaching him on what to do.

He looked flustered, "W-Would you-a like to go for an evening stroll? A-And a nice dinner by the…Er…Um…"

Mario coughed into his fist, "_Bythemoonlight._"

"By the moonlight?" Luigi finished.

I smiled, "Of course!"

He smiled and together we walked out. I did not miss the huge smiles on Mario and Peach's faces; they were trying to get us together and it was no secret. The Toads bowed, holding the doors open as we headed to Peach's personal garden.

"Welcome to the Princess's personal garden," Toad—_the _Toad beamed, "Enjoy your evening."

Though he bowed, I didn't miss his sly grin. "It's also a perfect place that's _niiiice_ and _quiiiet_. In case you wanna…Get to _know _each other. _Bowchika~bow~chika~bowow_~!"

Luigi blushed, I arched an eyebrow; _little stinker_.

* * *

><p>The Toads had served a delicious dinner under the stars and were courteous hosts; bubbling drinks were always topped off and the four-course meal was to die for. Though Luigi was bummed about his lunch being waterlogged, this definitely made up for it.<p>

The evening was uneventful and tranquil as I spoke the majority of the time as Lulu bobbed his head and smiled. It had been like this since we were children: me doing all the gabbing, him listening and there was always a mutual enjoyment of the other's company.

Luigi and I walked around the lit pathway for a romantic moon-lit stroll. I sighed, enjoying the tepid temperature the Mushroom Kingdom was famous for. Daytime in Sarasaland could be blistering hot then drop to icy, subzero temperatures at nightfall.

"Nice night eh?" Luigi spoke.

"Very nice," I smiled back.

"We've known each other-a for how long?"

I rolled my eyes and smiled, "Since we were babies! I knew you before I could walk," I laughed, "We've been the dearest of friends."

"Right..._Friends_. Daisy?"

"Hmm?"

His expression was contemplative, brows furrowed as he stared forward. "I don't want you to-a think of me as a friend anymore."

I stopped walking. "What?"

"I want you to see me. To _see_-a me," he spoke in a stronger voice, but it still trembled. "N-Not as the boy you played-a with as but as a...Real romantic-a interest."

No longer was he nervous and fumbling. Now he spoke boldly, eyes strong. With his new-found confidence and sure speech he reminded me of Mario.

"All these years you've looked through-a me," he whispered, grimacing, "I was happy to be you're-a friend."

I was confused and a little hurt at the words. "What are you saying? You don't want to be my friend?"

"I..." He swallowed, cheeks glowing. "I've always been in l-love with you."

My shock was nearly tangible, as if a bucket of ice water had been flung on me. **_Lulu_**_ had been in love w-with __**me**__?_ I had been blindsided. Peach, Mario, Toad, Toadette, all my friends had joking ribbed us for years about becoming a couple_. Had they always known of his feelings for me_?

The secretive smiles, the winks, the giggles and the mischievous prodding they'd given was my answer. My friends had known the whole time and I had been completely unaware like a dork. I mistook his nervous tremors and overt blushes as normal.

My cheeks grew warm with blush, "For how long have you...?"

He cleared his throat, looking everywhere but at me. "I always have-a..."

This was awkward. He had the _hots _for me, to put things tactfully, and I didn't have a single clue for years. Decades even. My memory came to me as clear as a bell, there had been all those times where I had uncaringly changed before him and used his toothbrush and even modeled new clothes for him because I saw him as a _brother_.

_Oh Stars, I had _changed _in front of him! _My knees felt weak, as if my bones had dissolved.

"Luigi!" I screeched, cheeks dark red, "I thought of you as a brother! I-I _undressed_ in front of you! Y-You saw..."

Though he blushed, Luigi grinned, "Yeah…But I wasn't-a complaining."

I groaned, burying my face in my hands, "I'm such an idiot…"

"Not at all. I want you-a to see me like your other suitors and not as a friend." he spoke softly, frowning, "I want to be seen-a as a serious suitor."

"Lul—" the pet name seemed to too intimate now, and too reminiscent of the past he wanted me to forget. "Luigi. You're one of two people who really knows me. The real me. No suitor can ever take that away from us."

"Who's the other person?"

"Huh?" I blinked, shocked.

"You said two people. Who's the other person?"

It was Bowser. That big, arrogant scaly turtle had managed to worm his way into a friendship that was surprisingly well-fortified. Our friendship was lighthearted yet intense, happy and serious; it was the best of all worlds.

"Bowser..." I said with a trill of awe.

Luigi appeared surprised before he grew determined. "Miss Peach said I have to do-a something drastic to get you to believe-a me…"

"What is drastic?" I asked.

He turned to me, blue eyes smoldering, "How about a kiss-a?"

"Luigi…" I laughed nervously. "That's…."

His eyes narrowed. "Do you think I won't-a kiss you?"

I laughed a little more confidently at the thought. "Luigi, no. That's uncharacteristic of you."

His eyes flickered like blue lightning. "So you don't think-a I will?"

I smiled, shaking my head. "No I don't think you will. That's not like you to—"

Then it happened. He grabbed my waist, pulled me flush against his torso and kissed me _hard_. My head spun as my best friend of so many years _kissed _me. He pulled away, cheeks flushed and eyes bright. "Damn that felt-a good."

I gaped, probably unattractively; _Luigi kissed me_. Luigi Mario, my shy, soft-spoken friend had aggressively kissed me. I couldn't formulate proper words. He had rocked me like a hurricane. My blood sloshed violently in my veins.

"I've wanted to do that for-a years," he said quietly, suddenly bashful once again.

I tried my best to shake off the shock. "B-But that can't be true! You knew me when I was a teenager! I was skinny and shapeless a-and my hair was poofy and out of control! I was _not_ cute!"

Luigi laughed softly. "We grew up-a together. I guess you were skinny but so was-a I 'til I got this belly! And your hair? I always liked it-a. I thought it was-a pretty. And you were always cute-a. Daisy…I've _always _loved you."

I was teased for being flat as a board, having long twiggy legs and don't even get me started on all the ridicule I received on my hair. But he had liked me, he was endeared by my perceived flaws and despite what everyone else thought he had always seen me as pretty.

It was like some sappy romantic movie. But I wasn't complaining.

I blinked, my vision blurring with annoying tears. When I spoke it sounded like I had a frog in my throat. "You...Always liked me? But you knew Peach. She was so much more pretty and girly. E-Every boy who met her forgot about me. She never had zits and her hair was always shiny and perfect. You should have liked her like every other boy."

_Hell, Bowser had liked her_. She was so pretty and charming _even _a _Koopa_ had drooled over her. I sniffled as Luigi hummed thoughtfully, "Miss-a Peach was...is a _bella donna. _And you're-a right, lots of boys did like her. Very much."

I sniffled, using my arm to wipe at my running nose as he continued. "But there was no doubt-a, you were always pretty. And I liked your laugh-a, it's cute. And you-a punch hard. Maybe I'm a masochist or something-a but I think that's attractive."

I let out an ugly sounding sob. It was even half of a snort. Luigi's smile faded as concern glowed. "Daisy? What's wrong? Did I...Hurt your feelings-a?"

"No," I sniffled, "you made me happy. I'm just an emotional wreck right now! But I'm really, really happy!"

I suddenly grabbed him and pulled him into a bone-breaking hug. I heard him wheeze, "Dai...sy?"

"Hold _meeeee!_"

He patted my back, coughing a bit. Bleary-eyed and runny-nosed, I sniffled, "Would you…Kiss me now? Even if I'm a wreck?"

Luigi laughed, "I wouldn't even-a think about it twice."

"Then do it."

With a deep-hearted laugh, he pulled me to him once again. And honestly he didn't need to be told twice. Under the silver sliver of glowing moonlight, I was going to give him a chance. No longer was he Luigi my 'friend' but he was Luigi the suitor, the one who had always loved the unruly, tomboy princess.

Despite the crazy day in the Mushroom Kingdom, I had a lot of fun. And seeing Luigi as a suitor didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. Can't say I won't be excited to spend a day with Ryu and his people. Next stop, we go to the Hidden Lotus Village!

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><p>Alice: Hope you enjoyed! :3 Please leave a review.<p>

Ultrra: Leave a review and you get to join Peach's hugsie circle. But if you _don't _leave a review, we're gonna send drunk Bowser to your house. XD

Alice: LOL! PLEASE review! X)


	24. Kingdom Tour: Hidden Lotus

Alice: Heeeeeey! Welcome to the 24th chapter! Everyone's really excited or interested since this is the chapter we learn about Ryu and the Hidden Lotus Village! :3 Everyone knows you're excited Ultrra! XD

Ultrra: PWAH! I don't like him. -_- I'm team BOWSAH ALL THE WAY!

Alice: Make that sound again. XD

Ultrra: _PWAH_! XD

Alice: XD LOL! One more time!

Ultrra: **PWAH!** XDD

Alice: LOL! There we go. XD As you all know, this is a looooong chapter. Bookmark it, take all the time you need, take breaks, eat snacks, this one is long!

Ultrra: Yeah, I am NOT envious of your Beta.

(XXX Days ago)

Hal: (receives document to edit)...24,000 words? **Nucking futs** Slice Atar…

(Present Day)

Ultrra: Slice Atar? That sounds kinda cool! X)

Alice: (Worried look)…

Ultrra: In the next coming days, if he tries to assassinate you or pays me to do so, don't be surprised.

Alice: You'd wanna assassinate me Ultrra!? O,O (Puppy eyes)

Ultrra: (rubs chin) If the price is right…

Alice: O_O

Ultrra: LOL Alice! I'm kidding!

Alice: =_= When it's your birthday. DON'T except anything! ^_^ To the rest of my nonviolent readers and reviewers, enjoy! (waves)

Ultrra: (Puppy look) But I…I want my birthday gifts… O_O

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: Halcyon Electric<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>It was bittersweet saying our farewells to the Mushroom Kingdom. Uncle Apricotto's melodramatic tears, bear-hugs, and gross sniffling only prolonged the departure. In the span of half an hour, Unc had went through two tissue boxes and slobbered all over Mario's iconic red shirt.<p>

I won't lie; it was funny when he attempted to give Bowser a goodbye hug. Uncle tapped his shoulder and Bowser couldn't have hid his growing sneer if he tried.

"Come on _B-Bowz,_" Uncle sniffled, holding out his arms for a hug. "We're like _family _now. Give your cool uncle some sugar."

Bowser twitched violently, "_Sugar_!?" He brandished his fist and glowered, "I'll _give_ you some _sugar—_"

The Toads reacted immediately, creating a barrier between their king and the furious Koopa king. Mario was beside King Toadstool within seconds.

"T-Think nice thoughts!" Toadsworth crooned worriedly. "_Nice _thoughts!"

"How about a huggie-poo?" Uncle reached towards the large Koopa again.

Bowser turned his head, scrunched his eyes, and flapped his hands, "_Why _do you bother me!? What have I done to incur such _dreadful _wrath!? I've _only _kidnapped your daughter a _handful_ of times! Gimmie a break!"

So as Mario and the Toads pulled away my sobbing Uncle, Peach pulled me into a hug and the scent of her sweet perfume filled my nose.

"Take care Pink."

"Take care Yellow. By the way…I want to know everything when you get back," she whispered conspiratorially, "and don't spare a single detail. I know you kissed Luigi last night."

My eyes widened as she laughed wickedly. However, Peach's laughter could _never_ be evil because her voice was sweet and airy. But it was pretty damn close.

"Don't get into too much trouble with the hunky Shinobi," Peach sing-sang, "but if you _do_, I want to be the first to know what you did!"

"P-Peach?!"

"Oh! And _don't_ go easy on Bowser," she whispered, "Give him tons of _trouble_." She, rather un-Peach-ly, nudged me with an elbow.

"_Peach_!" I bleated. The guy was a _Koopa! _He had really good hearing and probably _heard _that!

As she drew away, Peach laughed melodically. The Toads and Toadsworth gave Luigi the warmest farewell and nervously whimpered their good byes to Bowser. As we boarded the personal jet, the two pilots exited the aircraft holding maps, "Princess, we've searched the entire map and there's _no_ Hidden Lotus village!"

Grammy laughed, "Gee, I suppose it wouldn't be or it wouldn't be called _hidden _now would it gentlemen?"

Wolfe coughed suspiciously, "_Grandmaburn_!"

"It's not on any map," Ryu replied smoothly, "It's hidden near the Choco Mountains."

The co-pilot stared askance, "So...fly near the Choco Mountains? That's _it!_?"

His face contorted with irritation. "Kind of vague don't you think!? We have to report the princess's location to his Eminence."

"The Choco Mountains are the closest landmark," Ryu spoke, his tone as suave as ever. "I know it does little to assuage your distrust, but no outsider can get to the village by foot. I'll lead through the forest."

Wolfe turned to Silver, "What does 'assuage' mean? I thought the man was talking about...Well, honestly I didn't _know_ what the hell he was talking about."

Silver sweat-dropped, "D-Don't worry yourself over it Wolfe."

After much arguing and convincing, the pilots finally agreed to depart. With notification to Father, the plane took to the air. It was hours later the jet landed near the Choco Mountains—there was a Mario Kart track here—and we headed to a nearby forest. It was dark with a leafy canopy of towering trees and flowering blossoms.

"_This_ is hidden?" Zero spoke with disbelief, "What's so 'hidden' about it? You fly to the Choco Mountains, enter the forest and here we are."

"He's calling you out Ryu," Wolfe instigated, laughing a bit, "You gonna take that?"

Ryu seemed unperturbed, "It may not seem hidden, but this forest is enchanted. If you don't know how to dispel the illusion, you'll wander in circles."

"Illusion?" Grammy hummed as she took in the leafy scenery. "This is an illusion? Wow."

"Probably like-a the Forest Maze-a?" Luigi hummed, "Mario got-a stuck in that-a forest too!"

Ryu made an abrupt hand signal and the verdure of the forest suddenly shimmered and disappeared like a mirage. The thick foliage melted away until an opening appeared like a pathway.

Wolfe and Luigi 'oohed!' in the same mesmerized chord. We walked through the columns of towering trees, heading towards the glowing slivers of sunshine that promised an exit. Puppo sniffed the air before growling, fur standing on end. Taurus glared, "Why is that _thing _making noise?"

Before we reached the edge of the forest, two men suddenly dropped from the trees. Luigi and Silver shrieked in surprise as Wolfe huffed and crossed his arms, "Huh. You know, I _thought_ I smelt two other people..."

"Puppo k-knew they were there," Silver smiled.

Puppo yipped happily as Wolfe patted him, "Atta boy Pupster! Atta _booooy_!"

"You are trespassing. You do _not _belong here," one of the men growled.

"Leave or you will be done away with immediately," the second spoke with no inflection.

He brandished a knife that sparkled under the sun wickedly. Luigi and Silver trembled, backing away. Luigi laughed nervously as he took a hold of my hand. "Well you-a heard the nice-a man, it's time-a to go!"

On the other hand, Bowser took a slightly different approach. The King Koopa grinned viciously, cracking his knuckles. "Is that a _challenge,_ gentlemen?"

"At ease," Ryu said firmly. "We're stopping by."

The Shinobi relaxed at the sight of their leader and the simmering animosity cooled. They bowed as he gave orders. "Alert the senators and my family of our arrival."

"Hai Ryu-_dono_."

And with that, the Shinobi guards made a hand signal and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Isn't that_ cool_?!" Wolfe 'whispered' to Luigi, "They were waiting to _assassinate_ us!"

Luigi looked worried, "I don't think-a that's cool _at all_!"

"That's because it's_ no_t cool at all. Wolfe's just a moron," Bowser grunted.

"It's cool and you_ know_ it!" Wolfe laughed.

It wasn't much longer before the green border of the village came into view. Grammy cooed, camera in hand as Ryu moved the last tree branch and stepped aside. "Welcome to the Hidden Lotus Village."

The village was beautiful, embedded deep within a lush green forest filled with sparkling rivers and lakes that glinted like glittering diamonds under the morning sun. The settlement was quaint and held its own comely charm, dotted with bamboo buildings, a community well, and carved dirt pathways.

The people of the Hidden Lotus Village were ebon-haired, dark-eyed and fleshed with a smooth golden complexion. The citizens greeted Ryu respectfully, bowing at the waist. Ever mindful of their stares, the Hidden Lotus citizens gauged us with polite curiosity. A group of distinguished-looking men approached, each walking with an air of importance.

Surprisingly Ryu bowed deeper as he turned to us, "These are the senators of the Lotus Village, a selected council to help the clan head rule. We are a Shinobi clan of skilled warriors. This is Senator Fa."

A hunched, tiny elder bowed before turning around and _ruthlessly _breaking his fist through a wooden plank. Jaws dropped and Grammy blinked before taking a picture.

"_Star damn_!" Wolfe squeaked.

Where did that board come from?! Heck, how did he do that?! This senator has to be _jamming_ his way up into his eighties but he's smashing boards!

"Senator So."

Ryu motioned to an elder in a gray robe. Senator So bowed before shredding a board with his a ruthless chop.

"Senator La and Senator Ti." They bowed before exploding into spinning roundhouses and obliterated two wooden boards. Luigi gaped as Silver clapped politely.

"You now know where we stand," Senator Fa spoke sagaciously, bowing.

"Hell _yeah_ we do!" Wolfe baulked, "Step outta line and you'll get your ass _kicked_!"

Ryu stepped forward, gesturing to a tall, wizened man in a dark robe, "And this is my grandfather, Ryuunosuke. He is the most extolled clan leader. He has retired and is an inactive Shinobi."

In the sea of staid faces, his grandfather's smile was heartening, "In other words, I am old!"

I cracked a grin as Ryu continued the introductions seamlessly. "This is my Father Ryushen, a legendary Shinobi who is still great beyond the scope of his prime."

As the man stepped forward, Ryu bowed deeply. The father and son duo bore little resemblance physically, save the dark hair and almond complexion. Where Ryu was lean and nothing but hard angles, his father was stout, big, strong and robust.

Ryushen had deep wrinkles around his brow line, telling of a man who had thought much and frowned plenty in his life. The dedication of his profession manifested itself upon his flesh. An ugly pucker of a pink scar started by his chin and trailed under the collar of his yukata.

"Father, Grandfather this is Princess Daisy or as we'd say _Deiji-hime_ and this is her grandmother, Meringue-_kun_."

I walked before his paternal lineage and bowed properly. "_Ahula_, I am Princess Sarasaland. I am enchanted to meet you."

"And I am empress Meringue. It is great to be here." Grammy bowed her head, "I love the similar family names."

Ryushen nodded and growled in a rough baritone. "The pleasure is ours empress, princess."

I was startled when Ryu's grandfather glided forward and suddenly took my hand. "Ah! It's been awhile since I've seen a desert girl! Glowing skin like honey and hair scented like the kiss of sunlight and lilies!"

I smiled awkwardly at the friendly old man. Though he appeared shriveled from age, his eyes glowed with energy and warmth. "It's nice to meet you sir."

"Sir? Call me Grandpa! May I call you _Akage-Hime_? You have such pretty ruby hair."

I laughed, both shocked and elated by the man's abrupt yet kind mannerisms. "Sure!"

Ryu straightened up, "Where is—?"

"_Niiiiiisan_! Welcome hoooome!"

A blur darted past the line of rigid senators and firmly latched onto Ryu's torso. A boy with wild chocolate-brown hair and dark eyes peered up at him happily. "Welcome back _Niisan_! Didja kill any bad guys!? Didja chop anyone in half!? Didja poke anyone's eyes out!?"

Ryu affectionately mussed the boy's already unkempt hair and gave him a half-hug. "It's good to see you too, _Otouto_."

He turned to us. "I suppose I should introduce my little brother. This little terror is Tora."

"It means tiger!" The boy chirruped happily. "Like the tiger I am strong! _Grrr!_ And fast! And a master of—!"

"Settle down, son," Ryushen grunted, though he looked amused.

Tora zipped from Ryu's side and peered up at me curiously. "_Sofu _who's this _Gaijin_ with the red hair? Ooh! Look at her eyes! They're blue like yours, _Nissan,_ and so are the other lady's eyes! Oh! Look! There's a_dragon_! _Nissan_! _Nissan_ there's a real dragon with green scales and big teeth! _Sugoi_!"

Bowser smirked. "I like this kid. He knows a badass when he sees one."

The little boy turned and blinked up at Wolfe, whose already large smile grew broader. "_Oi_, that guy with the long hair has _weird_ yellow eyes."

Wolfe stopped smiling and appeared slightly offended. "Say what now…?"

Silver and Luigi hid their laughs as Wolfe's left eyebrow ticked with agitation; Puppo yipped with glee. Tora turned to me again. "What's your name, _Gaijin?"_

There was a terse moment where everyone fell silent; whatever Tora called me, I figured it could be misconstrued as offensive, but Grandpa Ryuunosuke lightly patted the child's head. "This is Princess Daisy and she comes from far away. Even though it's been quite some time since we've had outsiders within our village, let's not call her that word, eh?"

"Okay, sorry lady!" He chirruped, even offering a compensatory bow.

"No harm." I smiled, waving a hand. "Your name was Tora, right?"

"I'm Tora the great! And someday I'm going to be the greatest Shinobi!" The boy crowed, performing an actually impressive roundhouse, "I will smite evil! Curse curses and save—_Ow! Ow! Ow!_"

In the middle of his monologue, Ryu had pinched his brother's ear and wheeled him to his side. "That's enough. Before you save the world, learn to finish your _vegetables_. Be quiet and let the adults talk."

"Now then where was I? Oh yes, I must point out how the desert princess and the empress are both bursting with radiant beauty!" Grandpa Ryuunosuke waggled his eyebrows.

Grammy grinned. "Charming man, I see!"

The senators looked none too happy with his informal cordiality. Ryushen shook his head in resignation as Grandfather Ryuunosuke 'discreetly' motioned Ryu to draw closer. Ryu obeyed, "_Hai, Sofu_?"

Tora deepened his voice to mock Ryu, "_Hai, Sofu."_

Without looking, Ryu pinched his brother's nose. Though Tora squealed, Ryu steadfastly ignored his wails of anguish and listened to his grandfather, "In the words of the great philosopher Mu-shu Pork, 'when in spring, appreciate the lotus in full bloom.'"

"Mu-shu Pork?" Wolfe whispered, "What the hell?"

The boys peered at each other quizzically. Luigi frowned. "I'm-a sure I've had Mu-shu pork before…And it was-a _not_ a person."

"So what my philosophy means…" Grandpa Ryuunosuke drew out his speech to add suspense.

"_Father_..." Ryushen warned.

He ignored his son. "What it means is: she's a cute one Ryu! Get her while she's single! And the empress is quite a sight as well."

Grammy laughed lightly as Ryu visibly tensed. A couple of the senators peered at Ryuunosuke skeptically. Tora laughed happily. "_Girlfriend! Girlfriend_! Nissan's got a giiirlfriii—"

Without batting an eye, Ryu discreetly pinched his brother's shoulder. Tora whined, pouting all the while. This made me laugh as Ryu's father pointedly cleared his throat. "Now that the _games _are done, shall we begin our tour Ryu-_Sama_?"

Ryu nodded. "If that suits you, _Otousan_."

Ryushen grunted noncommittally before peering at me austerely. I froze, feeling the intensity of his scrutinizing stare, dissecting and probing for flaw. One moment I was being analyzed and then the next Ryushen turned and headed off. The senators fell into line, walking in a practiced rhythm.

"_Oooooh_, he's certainly a serious one, isn't he?" Grammy mused, tapping a manicured nail to her cheek.

"I think he _hates_ me," I whispered.

"Give him time," Ryu replied, "he needs to warm up to new faces."

"Well," Wolfe dropped a hand on my shoulder, "look at the positives!"

"And that is…?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Ryu's Grandpa thinks you're cute!" Wolfe broke out into laughter and nudged me with an elbow.

"Gee _thanks_," I snapped, shoving him away briskly.

"Hey, lady!"

I whirled to face the adorable voice. "Hey Tora!"

He padded to my side with a large smile, "Today is the love festival, y'know. Are you gonna go? Huh? Are ya?"

"Is it fun?" I smiled back.

"Yeah, it is totally fun! But it's kind of stupid," he huffed, "It's lovey-dovey and boys like to kiss girls. _Blech! _Gross right?"

Amused, I arched an eyebrow. "Kissing? _Lots_ of kissing?"

"Yeah," he leaned in to 'whisper'. "So be careful of _Nissan._ He might try to kiss and hug—"

Without so much of a warning, Ryu stuck his foot out just a bit further and tripped his little brother. But before Tora could face plant, Ryu caught him and set him back on his feet, "Be careful Tora."

Offended, Tora snapped back, "_Hey!_ You did that on purpose!"

"I did not."

"Yes you did! You tried to trip me!"

Ryu barely smirked, "No I didn't."

"I-I will tell Father if you do it again!"

As we traveled through the village, the citizens openly stared, children even pointed. Unsurprisingly, most of the attention was geared to the burly eight-foot Koopa. As the people gaped, Bowser peered at them curiously. A child with large eyes and a smile grinned, rushing up to him.

The toddler giggled then blurted, "_Konnichiwa Kame-sama_!"

Bowser looked amused. "Hey there, tyke."

"_Kame-sama_!" The child giggled, holding his arms out, as if wanting to be picked up.

Bowser's brows shot up in surprise. Grammy and I stifled giggles as Wolfe grinned. An anxious mother rushed forward and picked up her overly-friendly child. She muttered a quiet apology and took off, scolding her child for being rude to _'Kame-sama_.'

"What does that word mean?" Bowser grumbled, "Comma or something."

I laughed; Bowser just _sucked_ when it came to saying words in other languages. I mean he couldn't say _Summani_ or anything foreign to save his life.

"It means 'turtle', Lord Bowser," Ryu supplied.

"He's a _dragon_," Tora grunted matter-of-factly.

"Turtle, huh? I guess that works," Bowser shrugged then grunted. "Better than being called fathead or dumbass."

Tora laughed. "The big dragon said a _bad_ word!"

He continued to giggle until Ryu pinched his elbow. Wolfe seemed amused, "I guess the crowd isn't used to new faces? New _handsome _faces." He stroked his hair jokingly for emphasis

Puppo barked something that killed Wolfe's cockiness, "I _am_ handsome you furred jerk!"

"T-They do stare," Silver gulped nervously.

"My apologies," Ryu murmured humbly, "It's been," he paused, "_awhile_ since we've had outsiders step foot in the village."

While Silver shied away, Wolfe was beaming, waving to the locals with exuberant relish. Taurus ignored them all, save the occasional attractive woman who caught his eye as Zero absorbed everything with a reserved curiosity.

While I took in the beautiful landscape, I realized Tora was peering at me, studying my appearance with childish curiosity. "What's up little tiger?"

"Your hair is red." Tora pointed out with innocent honesty. "Can I call you _Akage-chan_? It means 'redhead'."

"You sure can, kiddo." I smiled.

"And you have eyes the same color as my big brother," Tora chirped happily, "Are you going to be his girlfriend? I think he needs one. All he does is train and be serious and train and be serious and train and be se—"

I laughed when Ryu quickly lifted Tora by the elbow and carried him several feet. Tora squirmed and fought against his brother's grip, "Hey! Let me go! I'm a clan heir! You can't treat me like this! Unhand me you ruffian! Big meanie! _Baka!_"

Ryu walked his wriggling brother over to his grandfather. His voice was as strained as I had ever heard it. "_Please _watch over him, _Sofu_."

Grandfather laughed. "Of course Ryu. Come along Tora, let's let big brother flirt with _Akage-Hime_ alone, eh?"

I noticed Ryu tense slightly, but he immediately returned to us and continued the tour. The first destination was an old stone shrine with a towering statue of a dancing girl. As Grammy snapped a photo, one of the senators took it upon himself to begin a narration. "This is the Shrine of the Divine Maiden, where young girls come to learn comeliness, poise, elegance..."

As Grammy cooed about the beauteous green grass and the towering maiden statues, I approached a nearby tree that had grown its way through the eroded stone. It stuck out from its neighbors as it was the only tree bent and twisted in an unnatural gnarl of birch.

It looked old, weathered and there were weird…notches. In the muddled background Zero asked a question, inquiring about the shrine's creation date in his little jackass tone but I was too busy studying the tree.

"Looking at the old birch tree?"

I jumped and backed right into something solid. More accurately, I bumped into _someone _solid. I reached behind my back and patted at a firm torso. The cool feel of sleek silk and the defined ripple of strong muscle met my curious fingers. Immediately my face burned with blush.

_Ooooh shi—_

"Is this how the Princess of Sarasaland greets men? By _rubbing their stomachs_? I never knew Sarasasland held such odd customs." The amused, smooth voice floated to my ears and my eyes shot open.

I spun around, eyes frantic. "Oh Stars! I'm s-so sorry! I-I-I didn't m-mean to!"

"It's alright," his grin faded slightly and he turned to the tree, "But why did you come over here?"

"Erm…" I coughed, peering at the tree, "I was trying to figure out why it was so dented. All the other trees are straight and this one is…crooked. See all these scratches? Where did they come from? Did a Blitty use this as a scratch post?"

Ryu peered pensively, arms crossed, before smiling softly. "As a child I used to practice my strikes on this tree. It was also here I learned the art of balance."

I arched a dubious eyebrow. "Practicing balance on a tree branch? Did you fall off?"

He seemed undisturbed, "Of course."

"Didn't it hurt?!" I exclaimed, barely able to comprehend the mental image of Ryu doing something clumsy.

"Very badly," he spoke with a slight chuckle in his voice. "That was my motivating factor to get better. And so I did."

"How's your balance? Mine is terrible." I realized our group was walking on to see other sites, though the inquisitive Tora peered back at us every now and then, vigilant of our separation from the group.

One moment Ryu stood by my side and the next he disappeared. I don't know how he did it, but Ryu dashed up the tree trunk, grabbed a branch and propelled himself to a higher branch with a graceful flip. He landed on his feet, arms crossed and posture perfectly straight.

"Wow," I blinked doe-ishly. "I wanted to see your balance, but _that _alone was impressive."

"Balance involves more strength than one would think."

Ryu jumped from the branch and landed at my side without making a sound. He seemed undisturbed by his effortless prowess and skill. I glared. "I hate you."

He laughed lightly, "Sorry. You inquired about the notches in the tree earlier, right?"

"Yeah I did _Super Shinobi_."

He ignored my immature insult. "My father told me, 'If your punches can split wood, you can defend yourself.'"

"Hmm," I rubbed my finger over a deep groove thoughtfully. "So…How do those punches look today, Mister Clan Leader?"

I was surprised at the mischievous glint in Ryu's blue eyes. "Do you _really _want to know?"

We traveled to an ostentatious wooden temple surrounded by lush green trees and bright foliage. Outside of the old temple stood stone animals, the tallest and greatest being the stone dragon. Upon entry we removed our shoes. Heh for a change, I'm glad Lady Angora proposed I receive a pedicure; my silver nail polish glowed against the wooden floor like liquid mercury.

The fresh, heady fragrances of pine and oak perfumed the air pleasantly. We continued, treading through the wooden dojo quietly. Ryu would point out each room's use and the skill-level of the corresponding students.

There were multiple rooms and as we walked past, one chamber was filled with school-age children. They moved as a unit, practicing punches, kicks and taking instructions. I smiled, beaming at the eager young faces. "Where are we? A school?"

"Close. This building is the village's dojo known as 'The Dragon's Lair'. Previous clan leaders have trained here since the village was founded."

The final and largest room had golden-gilded doors and tall, golden dragons with gaping jowls. A couple of lingering Shinobi who had been walking around idly jumped into action with Ryu's appearance. They rushed forward and bowed, awaiting their commands. Ryu spoke fluent Shinobian, tone cool and deep like sea water. The Shinobi bowed before setting to their task, stacking a chain of thick cement bricks until they were roughly torso-height.

"Think I can break these?" He asked with an air of amusement and…was that _arrogance?_

"Honestly?" I arched an eyebrow and folded my arms. "No...I mean you're strong and all but that is a tall stack of bricks!"

One moment Ryu was perfectly still and then the next he was a blur of lethal movement. I barely saw him move and his hands were a flash of motion as his fist barreled through the granite bricks with precision and phenomenal strength.

I jumped back, startled as the cement broke under his fist like a chain of stone vertebrae. A coif of soot curled in the air as I coughed, fanning away the lingering fumes. Ryu nonchalantly removed his fist and comfortably rested his arms over his torso. He had punched straight through ten cinder blocks _and then was perfectly calm about it_!

If I could punch through ten cinderblocks, the entire world would know about it! I gaped unintelligibly, staring at Ryu then down at the crumbling blocks.

"_Sheyt_..." I whispered, crouching to my knees for a better look.

I stuck my arm through the newly carved pathway, still admiring his skill, "Holy _sheyt_! You...You broke through ten blocks as if they were cardboard! You didn't hesitate or anything!"

Ryu half-smirked, nodding his head, like _I know I'm a sexy badass, what are you going to do about it?_

_Hehehe, what am **I** gonna do about it? I know EXACTLY what I'm gonna do about it. Firstly, I'd take you and that gorgeous, bod and...URGH! Clean thoughts! Cleeean thoughts are needed! _

"Wow," I laughed, "Remind me _never _to get on your bad side!"

"Noted." he chuckled.

I've always heard the saying, 'it's the quiet ones you have to watch out for' and I now understand it. Take Ryu for instance: calm, quiet, doesn't say much let alone speak unless necessary but he could open endless cases of ice-cold whoop-ass and you wouldn't see it coming.

"How do I learn to do a megaton punch like that!?" I grinned, rising to my feet.

"It doesn't seem like a proper thing princesses should learn, _Hime,_" he rubbed his chin, feigning deep thought.

"Oh come on!" I grabbed his arm, beaming at the sight of his amusement. "Teach me!"

"Very well then," he laughed.

"Wow? I convinced you just like _that?_"I laughed, "I must be powerful if I can sway the battle-hardened Ryu of the Hidden Lotus."

He laughed and gracefully lifted a brow. "Something about your eyes makes it hard to say no."

I ran a hand through my bangs, feeling my cheeks burn, "Uh...I know they're really, _really _big and childlike. I swear even to this day I can't even get into an R rated movie...Not saying I'm trying to watch _dirty _movies or anything like that…"

"They're flattering. I catch myself staring."

I stopped rambling when I realized Ryu was actively studying my facial features. Oh Stars, if I was red before I was neon now! He's _staring_ at me! He's staring at me with those pretty, midnight blue eyes! I glowed hotter than a Fire Flower, "W-Well...I? Uh...Heh…Uh...Thanks?"

He laughed, smoothly changing topics. "If you wish to throw a blow like a Lotus Shinobi, then I will teach you."

"Really?" I chirped.

"Really. Hold out your hand and make a fist."

As instructed I held my arm out, fist curled. Ryu made a few adjustments to my hand and arm positioning. I gulped inaudibly, trying to ignore his soft touch. This Shinobi has fists that shatter stone and yet his calloused fingers were pleasantly soft and warm against my skin. Ryu stepped away, studying my outstretched arm and once it was to his liking, he nodded approvingly.

"Alright, everything looks good. Go ahead and punch my hand with as much force as you can, _Deiji-Hime_."

I furrowed my brows, "But I might hurt you..."

I also didn't want to tell him how much of a huge klutz I was. I could very well see myself aiming for his hand and end up punching him right in the face. Ha ha, _Stars _that would be terrible! ...No really it would be. He'd probably never want to speak to me _again._

A smirk crawled across his face. "I highly doubt that. Now let me see your strike."

He leaned back, opening his stance as he held his palm out. "At your ready, _Deiji-Hime_."

After taking a deep breath, I threw a punch as hard as I could. Ryu nodded approvingly, "Good. Again only this time throw harder."

I threw a second punch with more force than the last.

"Not bad. You're pretty strong for a girl without training. You could be very strong."

"Thanks Ry—"

"But you can do better."

He smirked.

I arched an eyebrow; was that a _challenge_?

_Fine. Game on Ryu. _With a growl, I threw another punch, "_Hiyah!_"

"Faster."

A second strong left followed, "_Ha!_"

Ryu nodded his head before he went rummaging through a set of duffel bags. He returned with a board and held it up, "Final test, _Hime_. Break it."

I stared at the board, honing my concentration and seeing nothing but the wooden surface; I was going to break this damn thing. With a roar, my fist darted out, knuckles kissing the surface for a split second before the board snapped in halves.

I smiled, beaming up at Ryu who grinned. "Not bad; something tells me you've thrown a punch or two before. I had very few adjustments to make."

I laughed, rubbing the back of my head sheepishly. Bowser's scaly hide was three times tougher than any wooden board. I guess I've gotten so used to punching him for his wise cracking commentary that I can now effortlessly break boards.

_...Yeah, I'm still not sure if that's a good thing or not._

"Maybe once or twice."

Ryu half grinned, dark eyes warm, "It's probably best if we rejoin the others, undoubtedly they've realized I've kidnapped their fair princess."

I laughed, "Well, it's only a kidnapping if I didn't want to be taken."

Ryu's cerulean eyes glowed with warmth as he stretched a hand forth in a chivalrous offer. I clasped my fingers into his, entwining our digits together as we exited the warm dojo. The butterflies in my stomach were rioting, swirling and fluttering with tumultuous wonder and excitement.

It wasn't long before we rejoined the others near a river—Taurus peered at us with sharp suspicious intent as Bowser stared blankly. I realized Bowser's glare was dutifully captured on our interlocked fingers and with my other suitors beginning to take notice, I quickly dropped Ryu's hand. Like usual, Ryu seemed completely impassive.

"Now that Ryu-_dono_ has decided to _join_ us," A senator growled, "Let us continue around Serenity River."

"And where did _you _run off this whole time?" Grammy asked. She was grinning, nothing but trouble on her face.

"We went to his dojo and threw punches," I grinned, "I broke a board Grammy!"

Grammy raised an eyebrow, "So you…_only_ threw 'punches'?"

I flushed, "Yes! Stars, what are you implying!?"

"Hmm," she hummed thoughtfully, "You know, King Bowser was quite worried about you. The entire time he was looking for you."

I glanced in Bowser's direction, catching the profile of his brusque visage. With his gruff demeanor and hard glare, it was difficult to believe he _worried_ about anyone. And again, since I knew he had exceptional hearing, either he was emphatically ignoring our conversation or pretending not to hear.

"Why would he worry?" I asked myself out loud.

"That's a good question," Grammy hummed a response, "Why would he? Must be awfully special to have him concerned..."

The tour continued, taking us to a wooden pier overlooking the glittering river. Silverfish swam by the dozens, scales twinkling magically underwater. I skimmed my fingers over the cool waters and a quartet of curious fish nibbled at the tips of my slim fingers.

"It seems the fish are taken with you," Ryu hummed, "I might have more competition than I bargained for."

This made me laugh. "These fishes sure are friendly, Lord Ryu! This water is beautiful, when was the last time I saw such clear water? Del Fino Island maybe, but that's a vacation spot. This water is so pre—"

The tip of my stiletto caught between the wooden plank boards and snapped. I wobbled, careening backwards as Ryu's reaction was reflexive, a quick hand darting out to grab for me. But the momentum dragged us both off the pier and before we went crashing into the river, a flash of surprise crossed his face.

"_Argh_!" I screamed with unfeminine gusto.

There was a loud splash, a spray of icy water and I ended up on my ass soaked, cold and shivering. I gaped wordlessly; _Stars! Will there ever be a day I won't fall or stumble like an idiot!? _If there was a silver lining to this cloud, it existed because I managed to fall into shallow waters. So, everyone could see me in my klutzy misery. Actually, there was no silver lining here. Crap.

I peered at Ryu who was completely stunned, expression entirely unguarded. I had always planned to break through his equable composure but _not _like this. Ryu blinked, staring back through sopping-wet bangs that hung in his eyes. A slow smile broke across his face before he laughed deeply.

It was the first time I had heard, let alone seen, him laugh. He was stunning; it was like his eyes glowed and he seemed so much more youthful. I was determined to keep him smiling.

"Are you laughing at me, Ryu-_dono_?!" I snapped playfully.

"You look like a drowned rat," he laughed harder.

I crawled over, dress and hair dripping wet as he continued to laugh. I growled playfully, "That's it! I'm gonna kick your butt, Mister Tough Shinobi!"

I grabbed his arm and tried to forcibly pin him to the glossy riverbed but even as he half-heartedly wrestled, he was leagues stronger. Ryu laughed harder at my antics, grin growing as I tried to out-muscle him. "Not bad. You're pretty strong _Deiji_."

"Ready to admit your defeat?" I grinned wickedly, inches away from him.

"A Shinobi never forfeits," he smiled back archly, "You left yourself open."

"I left a wh—?"

"Tickle no-jutsu," he grinned wickedly.

With his pointer, he poked my middle and ran a finger up my ribs like xylophone keys. I wheezed, bubbling with laughter as Ryu rolled over, reversing our positions and I was on my back. There was a flood of gasps and even snarls as I laughed, still trying to out-muscle him, "If you let me go, I could beat you!"

"Remember, no one defeats the _mighty _clan leader," he grinned, "not even you _Deiji-hime_."

Then there was a scandalized, "_Ryu-dono!_"

Ryu froze, smile and mirth evaporating from his features like fog. Our heads snapped up and standing near the riverbanks was the entire group: suitors, Ryu's relatives and all. And currently their clan leader was straddling me, play-fighting in the middle of a river.

_If that's not undignified I don't know what is._

"_Kuso_…" he whispered.

Ryushen's glare deepened as Ryu's grandpa's eyes glowed with mirth. Tora looked confused but the worst were the senators. The stern-faced sovereigns glared upon us with something akin to hatred. Their eyes burned, lips peeled back into sneers, and brows creased. My suitors gaped to varying degrees but Bowser's face was stone cold save the intense glare.

The dragon of the Hidden Lotus rose to stand, generously helping me to my feet. Ryu drew out of the water as smoothly as a sieve from nectar. As for me? I waddled like a Cataquack, splashing and stumbling over the soaked hem of my gown.

Ryu seemed conscious of my inelegant water-flailing and gently guided me to the swallow riverbank. I was more than aware of how the wet dress plastered against my figure scandalously. So here I stood, wet, dripping and shivering as we bore the brunt of the disapproving stares. I blushed, realizing the majority of the attention was on me.

I crossed my arms over my torso since _that _was where the majority of the attention was. Ryushen's customary frown had deepened and his dark eyes flickered onto Ryu. The clan leader reacted immediately under his Father's penetrating stare. He spoke properly, as if his hair wasn't disheveled and hanging in his eyes foolishly, "I will see us both properly attired."

"That you will Ryu-_dono_," a senator all but spat.

_Wow all the ice in that statement could cause frostbite._

"Any words for such imprudent behavior, Master Ryuunosuke?" a second senator growled.

"Indeed," Ryu's grandpa spoke in a sagacious tone, "there is an ancient proverb worthy of such an occasion by the great Lo-Mein."

Senator Ti nodded, "Speak, Master."

Luigi whispered, "Lo-Mein? Mu-Shu Pork? Are-a these _really _people?"

Wolfe rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "If so, I find both of them delicious."

"It is the tale of the young man who fell into the lake with a young woman," Grandpa Ryuunosuke rubbed his chin with great thought, "The young lady was beautiful and spirited and the young master forgot himself."

The senators were stunned, "What…Kind of proverb is _that?_"

Master Ryuunosuke fingered his beard as his eyes became steely. "To be blunt Senator Fa, Ryu-_dono_ had a soaked, beautiful woman sitting atop of him. I'd be very, _very _concerned if he was not happy and giddy with glee."

Ryushen drew back, absolutely scandalized at such candor as Wolfe and Grammy trilled with laughter.

* * *

><p>"Sorry, I'm totally making things worse for you," I whispered, shoving my wet hair out of my face.<p>

I peered at Ryu who seemed tense. For a short trek we had traveled in terse silence. I don't think he even realized I had spoken to him. He was probably heated over the spectacle at the river, "Ryu?"

I placed my hand on his shoulder and surprisingly he jumped, pulling away. His reaction stung and I quickly removed my hand from his person, "Sorry…"

He was pissed. He's too gallant to say it but he's mad. Ryu relaxed, "My apologies, I just had…A lot on my mind…"

"You're mad aren't you?" I whispered.

"Frustrated honestly. And it's in the past, don't worry about it. The senators are…_difficult_ at times."

_At times? These guys have been murdering me with their eyes this whole day. Not to mention they've been lukewarm to Ryu._

"We've arrived. Welcome to Dragon Manor, home of the clan leaders past, present and future," Ryu spoke.

It was beautiful, neatly furnished with bamboo and the bold reds of mahogany and cherry wood. It was multiple stories built in the style Ryu called _Shoin-zukuri_, with a sloping roof and elegant sharp walls. Bonsai trees and a large glossy koi pond supplied a serene setting as brightly colored koi fish swam in lazy circles, unhurried and mellow.

Servants were at task, manicuring the beautiful home. They paused to bow briefly as we passed before resuming their duties. Though the servants avoided staring, the sopping clothing and dripping hair made a few maids double-take.

We entered the manor and I was greeted by a soft fragrance of jasmine and pine commingling into a welcoming blend. There were detailed, beautiful murals of colorful dragons crawling across the walls and walls filled with ornate sheathed swords. As we walked through the house, we traveled past many fierce stone statuses of men in various battle poses.

"Ancestors?" I asked, studying their expressions.

"Correct. They're the previous leaders," he walked to another statue, "Guess who this is."

I squinted at the features, "You?"

"Not quite…Go up a few generations."

I gaped, "That's Grandpa Ryuunosuke!? He looks…_Mean!_"

Ryu laughed, "Once upon a time he was a fierce warrior. Anyways, let's get going."

We traveled upstairs and entered a room furnished with a beautiful oak vanity and many colorful paper fans, it looked like a room furnished for a powerful woman, like a clan matriarch.

"Your suitcase should be awaiting you. I'll return once you've finished."

Sure enough, my luggage was bedside. Ryu turned and entered the room across the hall. Even before he was completely out of the room, Ryu was already removing the sopping scarf from his neck. And just as he disappeared from sight, he was already stripping out of his soaked shirt.

I blinked.

The soft rustling of discarded clothing felt deafening; my ears burned terribly from embarrassment. _He was undressing with the door open_?! I blushed to the roots of my hair; Stars! What was it with _boys_?! They could get naked _anywhere_ and not care!

I slapped my sliding-door closed and hurriedly changed into a plain lavender gown with white accents, begging my mind to get rid of the image it was desperately clinging to before I did something stupid. My hair was on its way to being an unruly, curly mass, so I dried it with a complimentary towel and studied my reflection. Despite the wild, curly hair I looked fine. When I pushed the rice door aside, Ryu was waiting, casually resting against the wall.

"Ready?"

He was outfitted in dangerously sleek, dark leather armor that hugged his strong form wondrously. He was reminiscent of a jaguar: dark, lean and compact with muscle. Even relaxed he looked dangerous.

_Stars he's delicious…If I had whipped cream…_

_..._

_Keep your thoughts clean!_

"Yeah…Let's go," I swallowed thickly.

"The others are waiting for us in the dojo. We should hurry," his expression lightened, "By the way I like your hair."

He liked the unruly curls? Startled at a compliment, I blushed, "Th-thank you. I like yo—I mean, uh I like your bod—_Ah_! I mean uh…You're really ho—_Oh Stars_…"

Ryu laughed softly, shaking his head, "Let's go _Deiji._"

I had made a fool of myself again. _Damn it. Damn! Damn! DAMN!_

As he turned away, I sighed. Oh _great_ now I was behind him. I could stare at him all I wanted and he wouldn't have a clue. I started a mini mantra as a tendril of sweat leaked down the side of my face: _don't stare at his butt, don't stare at his butt, don't stare at his butt, don't stare at his nice...perfect butt...Oh, there it is. Stars above does this man have a perfectly_ glorious_ ass._

_…_

_Damn it._

_Stars, I'm glad he can't read minds..._

* * *

><p>With one strong push, Ryu forced the large doors open with a resounding clatter. We entered the Dragon dojo and padded to the master room with the gilded golden dragons. Before entering, I placed a hand on Ryu's shoulder, "Hey…Wait a sec."<p>

He turned to look at me, "_Deiji-Hime_?"

"Again, sorry for dragging you in the lake," I whispered, "I get the idea I'm only making things harder for you."

Ryu's expression softened. He took my hand and squeezed it lightly, "Don't think anything of it; it's nothing I can't handle. I think it was worth it."

_He thought it was worth it? No, __**I **__thought it was worth it: I got to see the mad sexy Shinobi leader soaking wet and laughing. Delicious._

I smiled, "Okay…So, you're going to train? With the senators watching?"

"I'm going to perform a few katas to show my prowess," Ryu grinned, "But it's more like showing off than anything."

I realized I was staring again, but Stars did the armor _have_ to be that tight and that body so...

So…

_Perfect?!_

_He was yumtastic. Yummy like strawberry ice-cream._

Ryu opened the door and smiled, "After you, _Hime._"

"T-Thank you."

I entered and already everyone awaited us, resting on their knees on small bamboo mats, which were called _tatami _mats as I had learned. I kneeled beside Grammy, shooting a quick smile her way before facing center. Moments later Ryu strolled in, gait confident as he stood before us. He bowed deeply to his family and senators and surprisingly he turned and bowed to me.

"_Deiji-hime_, Meringue-_kun_, you have come to learn of my culture and people. The mastery of martial arts is as crucial as breathing within the Hidden Lotus. I will perform a few katas to highlight my prowess." Ryu bowed.

"Then please, do as you must." Grammy returned his bow as I curtsied.

"At your ready Ryu-_dono_," Senator Fa spoke.

A line of drummers sat against the wall, awaiting Ryu. A Shinobi walked over and handed him a thin strip of material. Ryu bowed, taking the strip of cloth and boldly tying it over his eyes. Luigi and Wolfe released impressed, "Ooohs!"

"H-He's gonna fight blind folded?" Silver whispered, eyes round with worry, "I hope he doesn't get hurt..."

"Don't worry Silv," Wolfe smiled, "He's a master Shinobi; he's probably done it hundreds of times! Let's hope he doesn't suck this time!"

Zero shook his head, "…What an idiot."

The room fell silent as the drummers raised their bachi sticks over their taiko drums, awaiting some type of signal to begin. With a smooth pivot, Ryu turned front and center.

"_Ikimashou_." Ryu spoke, voice completely devoid of sentiment.

Start? Begin? What?

The Lotus Dragon stood in the center of the floor waiting, muscles coiled to pounce. A fellow Shinobi rose to his feet and began to narrate loudly. The drummers began a slow tempo, setting the mood.

"_Twenty four years ago on a clear night...the moon glowed like an ethereal globe of fire. The heavens froze, the nightlife stilled and a child was born. He was the son of Ryushen, Grandson of Ryuunosuke. He had the will of fire and the strength of rock, the fluidity of water and the grace of air. He was named after the mighty reigning dragon, lord of all beasts. Thus the child was born Ryu, Lord of the dragons and the next clan leader_."

Bowser yawned obnoxiously as Wolfe shot him an amused grin.

"_Ryu dedicated his life to the marital arts, a mastery of strength, a homage to power. He would not be tempted by worldly joys and indecencies._"

Bowser snickered, "Was that a really coded way to say ol _Ry_ never got _any_?"

Wolfe and Luigi hid their laughter. Without looking away, I crushed my elbow into his knee. It must have hurt as Bowser emitted a low growl.

"_The Dragon of the Hidden Lotus is a master of five different martial arts and expertly wields twelve different weapons._"

A Shinobi tossed Ryu a bo-staff, which he caught fluidly. Ryu began to expertly brandish the weapon in menacing arcs. Each movement flowed into the next effortlessly with molten precision and lethal beauty. I was mesmerized by the graceful katas, each stroke infused with raw power and grace; it almost looked like a dance.

He even performed a mid-air flip and landed effortlessly. The drums matched his swift movements, creating the pulse behind his lethal dance. Ryu discarded the staff and was immediately tossed a bow. The drums grew frantic, pounding like the cadence of a wild heart. Interested, the senators leaned forward as Wolfe's grin grew larger.

"No way," Wolfe laughed, "He's gonna shoot someone blind-folded?! _No way!_"

"_The legend of his prowess spread to the four corners of the world: to the north, the south, the east and the west._"

Four Shinobi appeared, standing at the four corners of the room. Ryu waited, standing perfectly still. His fingers flexed, grip taut and ready.

"He was great in the north!" A Shinobi shouted, loudly smacking a reverberating drum.

Then the Lotus Dragon reacted. Ryu turned, drew the string of the bow taut and fired an arrow with little thought. There was a thud as the arrow buried in its mark. Luigi and Silver gaped as Tora grinned happily, bobbing his head. Taurus nodded with approval.

"_Hell yeah_!" Wolfe bellowed loudly, "Get some Ry!"

In response to Wolfe's boisterous cheering, a couple of senators shot scathing looks our way. I had a feeling we were supposed to be silent; not only were stillness and silence revered in this culture, but this was also a performance.

"He was great in the south!" A second Shinobi shouted.

Unsurprisingly the Shinobi was in the southern corner and loudly hit the drum. Ryu spun one-eighty, releasing a second swift arrow. Like the first it found its way home in the canvas of the drum.

"He was great in the east!"

The string was drawn and with an audible snap the arrow flew, burying into the eastern drum.

"He was great in the west!"

"How does he _do_ that?!" Wolfe cried, watching Ryu masterfully bury another arrow into its mark, "he can't see but how does he knows where to aim?!"

"He's talented," Zero acquiesced, "I'll give him that."

"Those warriors," Taurus whispered with intrigue, "when they speak, he hears them and knows where to aim. Quite impressive."

Appraisal glowed on the faces of the suitors, save Bowser who appeared to be growing more and more irritated with each feat performed. Grammy's eyes glowed at Ryu's skill as Tora's grin glowed brighter than the sun.

"_Even when the odds are against him, the Dragon of the Lotus village reigns supreme. A man who has ascended fallibility, carnal want and weakness is the undaunted warrior of ninjitsu._"

Ryu picked up the discarded bo-staff and stood at attention. Five Shinobi circled him, moving with silent steps. Grammy leaned forward, eyes twinkling with excitement. _Wow, this was like a Bruce Leelakitu movie!_

"_He could fight without sight, move as soundless as a phantom and render the powerful weak._"

The five Shinobi leapt into action, attacking all at once and for a horrifying second Ryu didn't make a move. The attackers were feet away, and then it was inches as they raised their weapons, drawing too close and when it seemed he had hesitated too long, Ryu dropped into a defensive stance.

"I see you." And with that he began his swift dance of death.

Ryu subdued them effortlessly, flourishing the staff in a frightening arc. He dodged and ducked, parrying and countering with elegance and accuracy. If this had been a real fight, these Shinobi he faced would have been dead. The beaten Shinobi moved away as Ryu continued to twirl the staff in skillful arcs and circles.

"_He is the Dragon of the Hidden Village._"

And then all movement ceased; all drum-pounding halted and the lethal dance froze, ending with Ryu slamming the staff against the floor. The entire room was silent, breath stilled as the rush of adrenaline hung in the air as thick as fog. Ryu pulled the blindfold up, peering at his subordinates. He bowed to them before turning to us with a bow.

"This is our leader, Ryu-_dono_."

One moment it was silent and then the next, Wolfe and I clapped loudly, cheering. This caused the senators to shoot dirty glares at us and even Ryushen cast a disapproving look our way. That was enough to make me stop clapping but did Wolfe catch on to such subtly?

"Ry! Hey Ryu!"

Of course not.

Wolfe ran over, slapping Ryu's shoulder in an amicable gesture. Wolfe's loud voice echoed, "You kicked _so_ much ass!"

"That guy's loud _Sofu," _Tora muttered to his grandfather.

Wolfe's voice echoed uncomfortably, particularly his profanity. Ryu had enough tact not to wince as the elder shot disapproving glances their way. The four senators rose in tandem, not making a single sound. The elder in the darkest robes spoke, "Masterful execution as always, Ryu-_dono_."

"Masterful but not perfect," a second senator agreed.

"Keep practicing and you'll get better."

"Your movements flowed, but they did not flow like water. Practice makes perfect."

Ryu bowed, saying nothing in his defense; I don't know what performance they watched but Ryu _was _near perfect. And with the critique given, the senators turned and walked out.

Ryushen gave his son a nod, "Good work Ryu-_Sama_. The senators and I have much to discuss. We shall join you later on."

"Very well Father."

Ryushen bowed to Grammy and followed after the senators. Though Ryu's expression didn't falter, there was obvious tension bunched in his shoulders as Wolfe snorted, "Aw don't worry about them Ry. They're just super old and crotchety. You were great! I don't know why they didn't say you weren't fluid or whatever."

Ryu remained silent, planting the bo staff against the floor, "..."

"W-Wolfe," Silver spoke softly, "Uh…Y-You're kinda being…Uh…Just a little bit—"

"Since you're _simple-minded_ Wolfesbane, allow me to explain," Zero spoke, arms crossed, "Those senators are the judge, jury and executioners around here. They have been studying Ryu's mettle as leader this entire day and you have been screwing up things for him."

Wolfe frowned as Puppo growled from his shoulder, "What? That's not true!"

"Silence and stillness is a way of this culture that even children are astute enough to observe," Zero nodded at Tora, who had been quiet, "and yet you haven't been keen enough to observe such boundaries."

"Wanna come over here and say th—"

"And every time you speak _Wolfe, _you offend. I have no idea _why_ but every time _you_ screw up, the elders see it as a shortcoming on Ryu's behalf. Guilt by association I suppose."

Wolfe furrowed his brows as Zero shrugged, "When we traveled to Land's End we practiced your culture, show a little respect and observe his even if that means you've got to stop up that big mouth every now and then."

Wolfe shot a scathing glare at Zero before sheepishly facing Ryu, "Sorry Ry."

Ryu half-shrugged, "It's fine."

Wolfe smiled, "For a change I'm going to listen to doofus head—_that's Zero_—and I will be the perfect guest!"

"That's just grand, Wolfe!" Grammy smiled.

Wolfe bowed, "Ryu-dojo."

I'm sure that was _not _the correct suffix. Ryu blinked, appearing surprised, "What...was that?"

"I don't know the suffix so I combined them all," Wolfe bowed again with a 'serious' expression, "Ryu-mango."

A rare smile grew across Ryu's face, "Lord Wolfesbane. San will work just fine. And_ please_ stop bowing…It looks ridiculous _and_ awkward…"

"Okay Ryu-San," And with that Wolfe rose to his full height, beaming, "So what's next? More bad-ass karate moves? More bushido? Why don't you teach me that one move you did?"

Luigi frowned, "Wolfe…I'm not an expert-a but karate and bushido are-a not the same th—"

Zero shook his head, "Don't bother trying to teach Wolfe anything. It's like trying to get a Yoshi to quit being a glutton."

Grandpa Ryuunosuke approached with Tora. "I've got a good idea where we can visit to next! Come, come everyone! I guarantee you'll like it!"

"Are we going to the—" But before Tora could finish, Grandpa Ryuunosuke covered his mouth, "Ready to follow me? I promise you won't regret it!"

* * *

><p>The next stop was at a wooden building, though simple it was elegant with its sleek architecture and cobblestone embellishments. Grandpa Ryuunosuke beamed, "Come in! I'll show you around."<p>

"It smells wonderful," Grammy hummed approvingly, "Just like—"

"_Tea!"_ Silver chirruped happily.

"You seem excited Silv!" I laughed.

"Of course! I _love _tea," Silver glowed, cheeks red, "It's amazing!"

"He _loves _tea-a," Luigi smiled, nudging me, "Jealous, Princess?"

I rolled my eyes, "Oh whatever, Lulu."

Upon entry Silver lit up like a child in a toy store. Though I wasn't much of a tea fanatic, the aroma lingering in the air was delicious and sweet. There was a collection of aromatic plants like thyme, basil and rosemary the teahouse grew for fresh herbal blends. The growing herbs and flowering buds clung to the windowsills lovingly, bathing in the glowing sunlight.

Grandpa Ryuunosuke invited us to take a seat at his best table. Ryu sat on his knees and we copied because when in the Hidden Lotus, you did as the Shinobi did. A teahouse worker delivered a plate of delicious pastries, setting them on the table with a bow.

Gramps glowed gleefully, "Enjoy! I had these personalized for you all!"

"Me too, _Sofu?_"Tora chirruped, big eyes hopeful.

"Of course, little tiger," he mussed his grandson's wild chocolate locks, "now enjoy."

Just like Gramps promised, each pastry was customized. All pastries were made to look like our faces, made of whipped cream, berries and other fresh fruits. I laughed, seeing my pastry's red hair and big blueberries for eyes.

"Cool!" Wolfe laughed, "It's me!"

"It can't be you," Zero took his tartlet and grinned, "It actually looks smart."

Wolfe shot a scathing glare at Zero, "And yours can't be you because it's _not_ ugly enough!"

Luigi coughed up a laugh, and surprisingly Ryu of all people coughed into his fist, hiding a _too_ obvious grin. Tora burst into exuberant, childish laughter as Wolfe gave him a thumbs-up.

"Settle down boys," Grammy admonished gently, taking a hold of her pastry, "Cute! White hair made from cream and blueberry eyes! I never looked better!"

Bowser's pastry had furrowed strawberry brows, banana horns and red cherries for eyes. It was so cute! Bowser grumbled, "That doesn't look like me at all."

"Oh that's so cute!" Grammy snapped a picture.

"He even made a cookie for the Pupster. Thanks Gramps, you're awesome!" Wolfe smiled largely.

"It is no problem, young Canine."

Ryu spoke to the entire table, "Our village is infamous for our delightful tea. I thought you all would enjoy sampling them."

"I've got no problem karate king," Wolfe grinned, "Food is food."

"You see that's just the thing," Taurus snapped, "Tea is _not_ food it's a beverage. Did you eat paint chips as a child? That would explain the lack of intelligence."

"No," then Wolfe beamed, smiling almost sweetly. "But your _mom_ liked it when I gave them to her."

Beautiful porcelain tea pots and delicate china were brandished as we sampled the various teas of the famous Dragon teahouse. Silver and Zero, who were avid tea consumers were impressed with the consistencies and bold flavors. Grandpa Ryuunosuke was pleased by the flood of praises his tea received.

Bowser, from what I can remember, hated tea because they 'tasted dull.' Amused, I watched as he mixed several teaspoons of sugar, vanilla, lavender, syrup, blueberries, jam and crème since he claimed the teas were 'too bland for his masculine pallet.' Did he add honey too? Yuck was he really going to drink that!?

Bowser's peculiar tea experimentation wasn't missed by the keen eyes of the Lotus dragon or his grandfather. Gramps raised an amused eyebrow, "King Bowser, do our teas not please you? I've never seen someone add so much crème!"

"I hate tea," Bowser growled, "I can only drink it if it's half sugar and milk."

"I'm offended!" Grandpa Ryuunosuke gasped animatedly, "That's it! We're going to find a tea that is worthy of a king! Bring out the other flavors! Bring out _all_ the flavors! We're not called the teahouse of endless flavor for nothing!"

Silver frowned at Bowser, "How can you _not_ like tea!? I-It's amazing! It is a staple of many cultures! Tea is an art! S-Sometimes tea is boiled for hours, at s-specific temperatures for the perfect ble—"

"_Why_ don't I like tea?" Bowser huffed, completely cutting off Silver with the tact of a Charging Chuck. "How about this: because I _don't _like it."

Silver gasped sounding terribly bothered, "You don't…_Like _tea!?"

Wolfe grinned, "Wow, look at that passion! You've managed to anger Silver! He never gets mad!"

"I don't know," Silver breathed with anger, "if I can _respect_ a man who doesn't like tea. Y-You disappoint me King Bowser."

Wolfe laughed at the impassioned speech as the search for Bowser's tea continued. We continued to sample myriads of aromatic beverages. My favorite was jasmine tea which held a sweet hint of flavor. Bowser took one sip of dragon tea—a favorite of many Hidden Lotus clan leaders—and roared happily with building-shaking approval.

"_Hell yeah. _Now _this_ is good," he growled, "It's like fire in a cup. And here I was thinking this teahouse was overrated."

"Ah, you savor the spicy notes of cinnamon and paprika!" Grandpa Ryuunosuke added with a hum, "Did you like the dragon tea, _Akage-hime_?"

"Yes, it's a bit spicy though," I smiled.

Lulu loved the Hidden Lotus spin on green tea. So while he helped himself to seconds, Wolfe plucked a cookie from the dessert tray and fed Puppo. Taurus cut a scathing glare at him. Wolfe shot him the same dirty look back, "Either I'm _really _sexy or you have a staring problem."

"It's rude to allow animals to eat at the table," Taurus sneered, watching as Puppo padded over to his cookie, "I've made an exception for you but the little blue mutt too?"

Zero laughed as Silver sent a disapproving frown.

"Ease the hell up," Wolfe huffed, "Puppo eats with us at home."

"Not all of us are ill-mannered savages," Taurus sneered, "_remove_ that stupid mongrel."

Something dark flickered in Wolfe's eyes, "What did you say?"

Half the table fell quiet as Wolfe's eyes smoldered with tangible ferocity, "_I'm_ the savage? You're calling _me_ savage when you're the one with a huge stain on your shirt?"

Taurus didn't bat an eye, "Blind as well as stupid, there is no stain, Canine Cro-Magnon."

Before anyone could intercede, Wolfe picked up a tea kettle and flung the boiling-hot liquid all over Taurus' expensive brand-name shirt. My jaw dropped as Bowser laughed. Grammy, Ryuunosuke, Silver and Luigi all gasped as Tora loudly crowded with an, 'oooooooh!'.

"Oh," Wolfe grinned roguishly, "It's there alright. Maybe you're the blind one Taur-ass."

Luigi and Zero hid muffled snickers as Grammy laughed outright. For a moment Taurus was frozen, the wheels in his mind turning and trying to figure out if that _really_ just happened. In two seconds he went from stupor to fury as his face burned red with ire. The Aqualandian heir sneered, eyes glinting like icicles as he picked up a cup of tea and flung the liquid in Wolfe's direction.

As if expecting the retaliation, Wolfe ducked as did Ryu—how he did I'll never know—and the tea splashed Zero's shoulder. Zero's expression remained eerily unaffected as he picked up the nearest pastry and threw it, hitting Luigi square on the cheek.

Stunned, Luigi picked up a chocolate muffin and aimed at Zero. By this time everyone saw it coming and ducked. Grammy laughed as the muffin soared overhead. The muffin flew through the air only to go splat...

On _Bowser's_ plastron.

We've screwed up now. Oh have we screwed _up_.

It was an instantaneous chain reaction; Bowser froze, everyone grew deathly quiet and Luigi swallowed thickly. The Koopa king's eyes narrowed, fists clenching as a dangerous amount of smoke billowed from his nose and jowls.

"Oh dear..." Grammy whispered.

Growling wrathfully, Bowser lifted the entire table overhead and rose to his feet.

"Wanna throw crap at _me!_? Then it's my turn!" He sneered, teeth bared.

_Oh sheyt_.

"_We're gonna die_!" Silver squeaked.

"Tora, run," Ryu said coolly.

The kid tore out of the shop as if he were on fire.

"_Food fiiiight_!" Wolfe yelled, laughing as he dove behind a table.

I got out of there before Bowser could strike. With a reverberating growl, Bowser flipped the table as food flew, splattering Silver, Zero and Luigi in sticky globs of pastry and sweet frosting. I peered over my shoulder to find my grandmother; I wasn't going to leave her in the middle of this shambolic warzone.

"Grammy?"

"Right on your tail _Pichi_, now _move it_!" She laughed.

I screamed happily, rushing behind a table as Grammy took sanctuary by my side. Grandpa Ryuunosuke was already hiding there and in a gesture of goodwill he raised his hands, "I bear you ladies no ill will. I may throw a papaya or two but I will not turn on you."

"That's all I ask," I chuckled.

Food, tea and desserts flew through the air in an edible crossfire. I picked up a pastry and aimed at an all too vulnerable Luigi; never show your back to a foe, Lulu! He gasped when the pastry landed in a sticky smear on his shirt.

I laughed, ducking away as Wolfe threw a teacake in my direction. It actually ripped through a rice paper door. Note to self: Wolfe is a powerful warrior, Ryu is a head Shinobi and Bowser was an eight-foot Koopa. I do _not_ want to get hit by them because it would _hurt. _Someone rushed by my side in an indistinguishable blur.

I grinned as Ryu took a knee, joining me to take cover. Armed with grapes I smiled at him, "Well, can't say I didn't see this coming!"

Bowser's furious snarls and roars echoed through the room and there was a loud bang as a table was tossed into the air. Then there was a second loud thud accompanied by a shrill scream. Someone—who looked a lot like Luigi—was flung into the air like a rag doll. The carnage from Bowser's warpath was real! He was pissed and was taking out anyone who was unfortunate enough to be in his way.

Ryu spoke with humor, "I'm afraid we've upset Lord Bowser."

"'Upset'? No, he's nowhere near upset, he's _furious_!" I laughed.

I was rewarded with rare laughter from the cool clan leader. Ryu peered at Grammy, "Empress, are you fairing well?"

"Splendid Lord Ryu, or I will be once I nail Zero with this croissant," Grammy was busy taking aim.

Ryu's gaze went to his grandfather. "_Sofu, ogenki desu ka_? Are you okay?"

"I am fine, grandson!" he laughed, ducking a stray croissant, "Now get someone good for grandfather."

I grinned, "You heard him, nail someone!"

Ryu idly tossed an orange before he threw with laser precision. Taurus was knocked off his feet and hit the floor with a loud thud. I laughed as Ryu quickly ducked behind the table. Taurus cursed loudly and that only made us laugh harder.

"What an arm!" I beamed.

"Atta boy!" Gramps laughed.

The table we were hiding behind was suddenly wrenched into the air. Bowser glared then did a double-take once he recognized us. In the face of his growing ire, Grammy and Ryuunosuke wisely retreated from the king's warpath. Bowser peered between the two of us and the color of his eyes seemed to glow brighter, like heating coals.

He growled menacingly, eyes narrowed, "Why are you two _always_ shacked up _together_?!"

"King Bowser," Ryu began, raising his pointer finger, "There's a—"

He growled, audibly snapping his teeth and lashing his tail, "_Don't_ try to reason with me, _human_. I'm about to kick you so hard, your ancestors will want to—"

A squishy, nameless fruit sailed through the air and plopped right on his head. I tried not to laugh as Ryu shrugged; he did try to warn him. For a moment Bowser's face was blank as a dribble of juice trickled down his face. But then his colossal ego roared to life.

The expression on Bowser's face shot several steps beyond murderous and was probably even scraping onto the verge of insanity; it was both really scary and quite funny. A thick vein pulsed on the side of Bowser's neck as he ground his jaw. Eyes blazing neon orange, his gaze honed in on the clan leader ominously.

Fed up with everything, Bowser effortlessly broke the table in halves and clambered closer. He grabbed my arm and flung me behind his shell, "_H-Hey!"_

"And now," Bowser growled, eyes slits as he stared Ryu down. His voice completely guttural, "I'm going to _pound_ you into nothing."

Oh Stars, he was going to kill Ryu! And violently judging by his expression.

"_Stars what is going on in here?!_"

Along with Ryushen, the four senators looked around the shop, taking in the overturned furniture and the splattered food with indignation. Tora popped up from behind them; ah, he must have ran and brought them here. Ryu rose to his feet.

He dusted a few crumbs of coffee cake from his armor but besides a few specks he was completely clean. Though Bowser halted his I'm-going-to-kill-Ryu plan, he was still glaring holes through the back of Ryu's head.

"My lords I can explain..."

"What explanation is needed _Ryu_?" One senator snapped; he must have been livid if he didn't add the honorific, "This is not acceptable behavior of the Hidden Lotus clan leader."

Ryu bowed to the waist, "My apologies."

"My Stars, it looks as if the coffee bread and tea pots held a war in here!" Senator Fa snarled.

I sucked in a laugh; I don't know why that was funny, but it had me holding in laughter. Senator So and Ti fixed Ryu with a stare so arctic the temperature should have dropped several degrees.

Ryushen spoke next, "This childish behavior is very unbecoming. You have made unnecessary work for the servants and you all shall stay in your rooms until this room is spotless. Ryu I want to speak to you _alone_."

_Oh, I know what that means. I've gotten that way too many times from my own father._

"W-We should take the fault too," Silver spoke.

"I agree," Luigi muttered softly.

Wolfe's guilt wafted like fumes. He stepped forward, "Hey…It wasn't his fault. I'm sorry. We started the fight not him. If there's anyone to blame it should be m—"

But Ryushen held up a hand to silence any further protest, "The clan leader should exercise better restraint. How is he to lead a village if he behaves so poorly? How can he lead if he cannot control ingenuous ambassadors?"

Wolfe remained silent, though it looked as if it pained him to do so. Ryu bowed, "Of course Father."

"I would like to speak with you after this," Ryushen spoke, eyes narrowed.

_Oooooooooooooh~._

"Of course," to his credit Ryu didn't flinch.

And with a gale of arctic words and not-so-veiled threats, they left with Tora in tow. Wolfe peered at Ryu, "Uh...sorry man. I didn't mean to get you in trouble."

"First the dojo spectacle and now this," Zero spoke, "I thought Ryu-_san_ was a friend, Wolfesbane. You've only made things harder for him."

"He _is _my friend _Zero_," he sneered.

Zero gave the slightest glare, "Then quit doing things that compromise him in the face of his superiors."

"Why do you want to help Ryu?" Silver asked, "W-We all know you don't like him or any of us. So w-why _do_ you want to help him?"

"I don't," Zero deadpanned, "It's blatantly obvious how the senators hold him accountable for everything that goes awry. I thought I'd just enlighten you so the oblivious Canine could quit screwing him over."

"He probably didn't mean any harm," Taurus smiled darkly, "The lowbrow have good intentions when mingling with cultured citizens but putting something _simple _into a rich society is like forcing a square peg into a circular hole."

"Taurus," I growled warningly, "Shut _up._"

Wolfe looked sheepish, "Sorry Ry..."

"It's fine Lord Wolfesbane," Ryu dusted a bagel off of his shoulder, "every point said by the senators and father was valid."

"Y-Yeah sorry Ryu-_san_," Silver whispered. His pale hair was littered with globs of mustard and other condiments.

"I suppose we should get cleaned up if we're to look presentable at tonight's festival," Ryu sighed, "Father has a thing or two he'd like to tell me."

"Remember," Wolfe spoke in a voice of wisdom, "anytime a person discreetly says, 'I want to talk to you' it usually means they wanna kick your ass. I know because my Ma says it to me _all _the time."

Ryu laughed, "You might be right. The senators were quite disenfranchised."

Grammy laughed, rising to her feet, "However, before we go, there's one more matter to attend."

Everyone turned to look at her, "And what's that Queen Meringue?"

Laughing, she held a jar of creamer in hand, "Tag! You're all it!"

And with that, she splashed us all. We were covered from head to toe in the thick, creamy liquid. While everyone was stunned, only Ryuunosuke laughed, "Ohoho! She got us good! I like this woman!"

* * *

><p>"If they weren't mad then! They're mad now!" I sighed.<p>

Grammy's spectacle had been the last straw of the Lotus senators' already frigid temperament. We had all been marched back to Dragon manor to our collective rooms to shower, clean up and wait until the festival began at sunset. Grounded at age 23. Thanks Grammy...

Grammy hummed, scrolling through her camera's menu. "Those old windbags need to _lighten up_. And besides, the looks on those boys' faces were completely worth it! Even your serious boyfriend looked stunned for a second."

Blushing hotly, I whipped around, "H-He is _not_ my boyfriend!"

Grammy arched an eyebrow so high it almost disappeared into her hairline, "Do you want him to be?"

"…"

"I'm going to take that as a—"

With a sigh, I headed to the door, "_Please_ don't 'take it' as anything. I'm going to step outside for a breath of fresh air."

"The senators said to stay here, being naughty are we?" Grammy smirked.

"I'll be gone for a _second._"

And with that I slid the door closed. I was surprised to find Luigi, Wolfe and Silver peering out the window. I crept beside them and there they had an eagle eye view of Ryu speaking with the senators and Ryushen. Ryu for a change didn't look as cool and equable as usual. Whatever was going on was stressing him out. They spoke in the graceful lilts of Shinobian and though it was a foreign language, I know an argument when I hear one.

"Wish I knew what they were saying," Wolfe hummed.

"I u-understand Shinobian," Silver spoke, "I-I learned multiple languages as a child. L-Like Sarasalandian, Aqualandian…"

Sarasalandian? So does that mean he's been secretly listening when I speak with Grammy? I'll have to keep tabs on that. Or start speaking to him in Sarasalandian. I peered at him, "Then translate Silv!"

We fell silent, listening to the soft voices. Silver frowned, "T-They question Ryu's capabilities as a leader. They think he is too young to lead properly. And they also think Wolfe is…Um…_Oh dear_...W-Well...T-They think Wolfe is...uh...a..um...gosh, well, a moron."

Luigi and I burst into peals of riotous laughter as Wolfe glared, face blazing red with adorable chagrin. Silver smiled apologetically, nervously twiddling his thumbs together at the show of Wolfe's obvious anger.

"Ha_ha_, that's _soooo _funny," he growled. Even Puppo barked with glee, "Traitor! _It's not even funny_!"

Silver bit his lip, "They a-also think you're terrible for Ryu, Princess."

I stopped laughing, "What? Why?!"

"They t-think you're loud, brash and unladylike. They don't like the idea of a _Gaijin_ o-or an outsider marrying into their prestigious clan. Y-Your ways are not their ways."

Wolfe hid a laugh, "Brash and loud? Well _that's_ true."

He and Luigi laughed until I elbowed the Canine heir in the gut. Wolfe doubled over, rubbing his smarting wound.

"Anything else?" I asked, frowning.

"R-Ryu's father is undecided about you. B-But Ryu thinks you'd make a good wife. The senators s-strictly disprove of your union with Ryu. But I just said that already didn't I?"

One moment Ryu was speaking, voice dark with anger and then the next he was bowing. And when he turned on his heels, he disappeared in a cloud of red smoke. Ryushen bowed before he turned and disappeared in a blizzard of leaves. _How did they disappear like that!?_

"I wonder-a where Ryu went to," Luigi hummed.

"He looked pissed. Well...As mad as he can be and Ry's pretty neutral," Wolfe mused.

I sighed, "Did any of you guys see where he went?"

"Seeing as he-a went _poof_, no."

"H-He probably went to clear his head," Silver replied.

I rolled my eyes, and headed towards the front exit but the boys shot disbelieving looks my way. Luigi shook his head, "Daisy you can't-a leave."

"Why?" I laughed dryly, "Is there a _curse _that'll stop me!? I'll be back soon."

"W-We're not supposed to leave, let alone be o-outside of our room!" Silver whispered, eyes shifting around.

"If you get caught you're toast," Wolfe frowned and Puppo nodded his head agreeably; even the Chow puppy knew not to screw around with the Shinobi.

"If Grammy asks where I went, tell her I went to find Ryu. If Bowser asks...Well say anything but _that_. For some odd reason he hates Ryu."

Wolfe grinned, "Bowser hates Ry? Better him than me!"

Luigi looked worried, "Whatever you-a do, don't-a get caught…"

And with that I turned and left.

* * *

><p>After the verbal spar with his senators and father, Ryu disappeared in a cloud of red smoke. He was a master-level warrior and I'm sure if he didn't want to be found then he wouldn't be. I was shocked when I spotted him; he was so still I nearly walked right past him.<p>

Ryu sat in a lush meadow meditating, legged folded, eyes closed and spine straight. I walked over, being as careful and silent as possible. But even before I was arms-length away he spoke, eyes still closed, "_Deiji-hime_, I hope this situation has not upset you."

His voice cutting through the silence startled me, but I continued to inch forward after a moment of stillness. I raptly studied his features; tan angular face, a hard jawline and strong cheekbones. When he peered at me, his eyes glowed under the sunlight like neon.

"Upset? No. But you seem to be. I understand things more than you think. It seems like across the grounds of different cultures, the elders are always the same: old, bitter, demanding, and stuck in their archaic ways."

Ryu smirked, "That's a kind way to put it."

I sighed, "I think they're too hard on you. You're smart, strong and well-mannered. What's wrong with them?! Most kingdoms have heirs that do nothing but party and spend wanton amounts of coins! Kings would kill each other if they could have you as their heir!"

"Are you spoiled?"

I laughed incredulously, "_Me_!? Spoiled? Ha! Do you know _who_ my father is?! He'd kick my ass! Okay not really but you get the point."

The faintest grin crossed his face, "Is that so?"

I paused, surveying the scene. Ryu hadn't been meditating in a meadow, though grassy and green like a prairie this was a cemetery. The burgundy leaves of dogwood trees and exotic cherry-pink petals made the cemetery oddly beautiful and provided a splash of color. Ryu sat before a sleek, glossy ebony headstone.

"Why do the senators hate you?" I whispered, "I picked up on it, Zero did, Silver, Luigi…Heck, everyone did._ Even_ Wolfe."

Ryu turned to peer at the headstone, "When my father still fought as a Shinobi, he competed against my uncle for the position of clan head. The decision was a tough choice and the senators deliberated for weeks and months. It was an even harsher decision knowing how Uncle and Father had been close; they trained together daily, ate meals together and even married sisters of the same line."

"The day of bestowment came and it was heavy with anticipation and nerve. In the end the senators chose Father to be the next leader. This crushed Uncle with great despair; he believed himself as Father's equal and saw no flaw in his katas and dedication. This led to the beginning of Uncle's descent into madness. This unleashed a wave of insecurity and bitter jealousy within his heart. Uncle claimed the senators had always favored my father. Their relationship as brothers, as friends suffocated under Uncle's blackened envy. Each night since Father's promotion, Uncle had become more reclusive, more biting and venomous."

I remained silent, absorbing his tale.

"Then one night it came to a head," Ryu whispered, "During a celebration of Father's new rank, Uncle confronted him. He was drunk with envy and fury as he spat, ridiculed and mocked. The senators were silent as the tirade carried on for too long. And finally Uncle went too far. He said Father was not fit to lead because he could barely manage his own life. He exposed a bitter secret and boldly demanded I was not my father's child, but a bastard. Uncle claimed my virtuous mother had…had born the son of her husband's brother."

I froze, horror flooding my bones, "Ryu..."

But Ryu continued as if I had never spoken. Though he stared at the sleek ebony headstones, his blue eyes were frosted with ice, "While Father felt his heart shatter, the uproar was incited, the senators demanded for the lives of Uncle and Mother. 'Death before dishonor' chimed loudly and angrily. Uncle had drowned too far in the depths of insanity to care and before they could execute him, Uncle took his own life with a blade, laughing the entire time."

He paused. "My mother begged Father for forgiveness but no matter how much his heart swelled, the senators raged, demanding her life."

Ryu closed his eyes, "By the dawn of the next day she was executed and Father had never been the same, a man who once laughed and smiled was suddenly cold and austere. I was a teenager and Tora was a few months old when this happened. But even then I couldn't understand why _Okaasan_ was executed or why_ Tousan_ peered at me with icy eyes."

"So you see, the senators despise me because they know. I am not worthy as clan leader because it is questionable if I am my father's son. A bastard son is not fit to rule or be a part of the prestigious Dragon lineage. They feel Tora should be the rightful leader. A Shinobi child with strange blue eyes is unexplained. But the senators believe the odd coloring marks a curse…Because I am bastard child."

Ryu sat with his eyes closed, brows furrowed as nothing but the faint ring of chimes clattered in the still air. I didn't know what to say, it was a lot to take in and it explained everything; Ryu was an exceptional warrior and yet the senators were never pleased. Nothing he did would change their minds because they saw him as unworthy.

"Ryu..."

His eyes were cold, unblinking as he stared at his mother's headstone.

"If you don't want to marry into such violence and bloodshed, I would not think ill of you," he spoke gently.

He rose to his feet, barely making a sound. The wind blew as his red scarf tickled my cheek.

"Mother was taken from me too," My voice finally caught his attention as his blue eyes rested upon me, "She was sick. My mom grew worse everyday and grew tired doing the most menial things and one day she…she just didn't wake up."

Ryu's hard visage faltered as I continued, "Maybe I can't relate to losing so much but I know how tough it is to lose a mother."

"_Gomensai_."

"It's fine." I turned away and peered at the sleek headstone, written in beautiful kanji.

"Does it ever upset you?" He asked in a soft whisper.

"Sometimes. But I'm closer to my grandmother and cousin because of it. I used to be jealous of Peach, even as children she was favored. But after mom died she became like an older sister to me."

"Hmm. I see. I can tell you two are close," his expression warmed slightly.

"The senator's hatred for something you can't help...Doesn't that anger you?"

As a man of subtly and control, so was his anger well-trained. If I wasn't watching so closely I would have missed it: the tense shoulders, the rigid posture and the intensity behind his eyes burned like flames.

"The senators demanded for your mother to be killed," I whispered, "Do you ever think about hurting them?"

Ryu spoke in a growl, "I was told through seeking revenge, one must be prepared to dig two graves."

I tilted my head, "I get who one of them is for but who is the second meant for? You get them and then what?"

Ryu's expression cooled as the unusual tension left his frame. He padded over to me, "I'll let you stew over it _Deiji-hime_...Come, it's getting cold. We should return and get ready for the festival."

"Alright but do you feel better?" I whispered.

He didn't smile but his gaze softened, "I do. _Arigato_. Thank you."

* * *

><p>We returned to the Dragon Manor where Ryu departed at a junction as a flock of maids flooded around me, "Princess! The festival is to start soon! We must beautify you and the empress!"<p>

Ryu laughed, "This is where we part, see you soon _Deiji-hime._"

With a wave he walked off and left me to the maids. They guided me back to the matron quarters where Grammy was looking through her camera, "There's my granddaughter."

The first maid bowed, "Empress, princess, are you ready to be decorated like a Hidden Lotus woman?"

"Sure!" Grammy beamed, "come on in ladies."

After taking a quick, warm bath—I _did_ fall into a river—the maids began the transformation. Three women wound my hair into an intricate bun, fastening the knot in place with beautiful hair sticks. Soft powder was artfully applied to my face, my lips were painted a cherry-red and my eyes were lined with black ink.

I was clothed in a glossy, ornamental kimono that was far too beautiful for someone as boyish as me. It was snow-white with a ruby-red sash. It seemed too soon when the maids smiled, stepping back, "You look beautiful."

"Thanks," I smiled.

My reflection barely looked like me; the young woman staring back seemed refined, delicate and elegant with sharp, pretty cat-like eyes and enchanting cherry lips. She didn't look anything like a graceless tomboy. Self-consciously, I smoothed the hem of the beautiful kimono.

"You look absolutely stunning," Grammy beamed.

She appeared, dressed in a carnation-pink kimono. I turned away, "Grammy, do you think I look ridiculous? I don't even look like myself. I look like a porcelain doll."

Grammy gave me a hug, "Of course you do! You're just a bit prettier and 'dolled' up, but I still see a desert girl with pretty eyes and lush hair. Now come on, we're supposed to go to the festival. Can't have fun if you're not smiling!"

"Thanks Grammy," I smiled.

The maids, who were dressed up as well, led us to a large green meadow where hundreds of stands were set up with games, food and prizes. The sky flushed fuchsia in the twilight horizon as the sun burned a beguiling garnet.

The crowds of bystanders were dressed in one of three colors: red, pink and white. I'd have to ask Ryu what the reason behind that was. As guests of honor we were led to the stage and there I found my other suitors waiting. Puppo spotted me first, yipping to grab Wolfe's attention. He turned my way, gaped and released a dragging whistle, "_Wow_, check you out."

My suitors approached, drinking in my appearance with ardent interest. I blushed, unused to the feel of so many eyes. Surprisingly Taurus spoke first, "Stars above you look absolutely marvelous."

"For once Taurus and I agree on something," Wolfe purred, "You took the wind out of my sails."

"You're beautiful," Silver smiled, "L-Like a doll."

_Yep. Doll._

"_Bella_," Luigi smiled.

"Thank you…" I smiled.

"The maids of the Hidden Lotus did well. No one would ever think you were a rough tomboy," Zero smirked.

My cheeks grew hotter when I noticed someone to my left. I turned, realizing Bowser hadn't said a single thing. His red eyes were busy taking in my new appearance. When I looked at him, a slow grin crossed his maw. He arched an eyebrow, "W-What do you think King Bowser…?"

"Yes," Grammy grinned, "What do you think of her radiant visage? Quite pretty, no?"

Why did it matter so much what he thought? As he continued to study me, my heart pounded against my rib cage as my temperature rose. Bowser chuckled, "Take what those other suitors said and magnify it by hundredfold. _That's _what I think."

One moment Bowser and I were holding each other's stare and the next a cloud of red smoke appeared on the stage. The citizens cheered boisterously at their leader's appearance. Once the red smoke disappeared, my eyes popped; Ryu looked _absolutely_ gorgeous.

He wore a sleeveless dark-red Shinobi outfit that all but revealed how lean and muscular he was. So I guess even he dressed to the color theme of the festival. Yep, that was my focus, not the muscles, _or _the tight body _or_ those gorgeous eyes.

I was studying him with _complete platonic_ interest. It didn't go unnoticed how the women and girls of his clan eyed his trim form with appreciation. The young girls giggled and whispered to one another as the women held secretive smiles.

"Greetings." Even without a microphone his smooth voice settled over the crowd, "and welcome to this year's festival of _Ai_. The time of the year we celebrate the bonds of friendship and observe the intoxicating presence of love. As you all know, we have several guests from varying kingdoms. Let us have them feel welcome."

He motioned towards us as the crowd clapped magnanimously. Near the front were Grandpa Ryuunosuke and Tora who smiled at us. Ryu spoke for a few minutes longer and with his last word the audience cheered before scattering every which way.

Grammy dragged me to the game booths and had her heart stolen by a macho-looking knife-throwing game.

"Ooh! This one looks _dangerous_," she grinned, eyes bright like stars, "Let's get into it, shall we _Pichi_?"

I wonder about her, I really do.

I sat back and watched as men threw five knives at a target and tried to hit the red bull's-eye. Then, in the midst of all the testosterone and muscles appeared Grammy with a heartwarming smile. You know, the kind of grandmotherly smile a _normal_ grandmother would wear when she served cookies. But no, _my _Grammy smiled like this when she was about to play with knives.

_Why does my Granna have to be such a badass?_

The reactions were hilarious, some people gaped, others gasped and some just looked downright confused. One man even rubbed his eyes as another shook his head and poured out his liquor, "I _knew_ I had to stop drinking sometime...But this just proves it."

"Are you..._lost_ ma'am?" One bystander asked her.

"Me? Oh no. I saw knives being thrown and wanted in!" She smiled.

"Do you...want me to move the target closer?" The game host asked slowly.

"Oh no that won't be necessary," Grammy smiled, "I haven't thrown one in a few years but it's just like riding a bike. It's all in the wrist!"

And with a quick flick of her slender wrist, the knife whizzed in the air and found purchase on the target. If their expressions were funny before, they were crazy now. And scarily enough, Grammy was really, _really_ good at this game. By her fourth knife she had a bull's-eye and the crowd went crazy.

I shook my head; she always had you questioning what kind of crazy stuff she did in her youth. A rise of cheer rose as Grammy continued to astound. The Shinobi flooded around, laughing and congratulating her. I was content to wander off, passing by a few noodle-eating competitions and women balancing dishes on their heads until a voice rang out.

"Fortunes! Fortunes! Come get your fortunes read! Ah, curious bystander are you? Step on up sire!"

Standing near the fortune booth was…_Bowser_!? Curious, I hovered nearby. The fortuneteller continued to chime happily, "Tell me my scaly friend, what part of your fortune would you like read?"

The fortuneteller looked _really _familiar; a fashionable, carnation-pink bob and glittering aquamarine eyes. She must have sensed my stare as she peered at me and offered an enticing wink, "Fortunes milady? Come one come all!"

Oh! It was the girl from my _Summani!_

I padded over as she smiled kindly, "Ho! It's the beauteous Princess Daisy! We meet again I see! 'Tis a small world no?"

"Hello," I beamed, "You're just everywhere aren't you? How did you get in to this village? The people seem so careful about letting outsiders in."

"I've been coming here for years," she winked, "Every festival I set up shop and read fortunes. You'd be surprised how many people love my fortunes; they're always accurate and true!" She huffed with an adorable pride.

I turned to Bowser, "She worked at my _Summani_ and served at the palace for a bit."

He grunted his acknowledgement. The Fortuneteller's pink bangs always seemed to fall across her face and cloak an eye; it only added to her alluring beauty.

"So what kind of fortune do you want read?" As she said this, she adroitly shuffled cards, "Luck? Prosperity? Death? Love maybe?"

I laughed and peered at Bowser, "What are you gonna choose?"

He smirked, "I know I want to hear _your_ love fortune."

For inexplicable reasons I blushed, maybe it was from his roguish grin or how he wanted to nose around in _my _un-glamorous love-life, "Then I want to hear _yours_!"

"Two love fortunes?" The fortuneteller looked amused, "that comes to a grand total of...no coins."

"Oh come on, we'll pay!" I smiled.

"Consider it a friend's discount," she winked, "So who's first? The king or the fair princess?"

"I vote the fair princess," Bowser guffawed.

"The Koopa king it is!" The pink-headed girl laughed.

I bust out laughing as Bowser shot a glare my way. The pink-haired fortuneteller moved her fingers over the glowing crystal ball. She chanted under her breath as her slender fingers wreathed and titillated, "_Ouuum_…_Ohuuuum_…_What is King Bowser's love fortune_...Oh! _Oh_! I can see it!"

"What?" I leaned forward, "what is it?"

Bowser glared, trying to peer into the smoggy crystal ball, "Ain't nothing even there!"

The pink-haired fortuneteller laughed, "_Oh my! _The glorious king is in _love_!"

"_What!_?" Bowser squawked, nearly toppling over backwards.

The sheer horror on Bowser's face was hilarious as his cheeks bled maroon. I keened with laughter; Oh my Stars! _He was in love!_

"Wha…?! This...! _T-That ain't true at all_! She doesn't know _anything_! Her stupid crystal ball is _stupid_! And her hair is _pink! _Who the hell has pink hair!?" He snarled defensively, face ripe with color.

"Did I say in love? I meant _madly_ in love," she continued to wiggle her fingers over the glowing crystal ball, "The king is passionate about this woman, dotes on her and _longs_ for her. He sees her as the mother of his children and his future queen. You have mighty big plans for her eh King Bowser?"

"No!_ I-I don't have any plans_!" He roared.

"Aw _Bowwy_!" I patted his shoulder and again he seemed to only glow brighter, "That's so sweet! Who is she?! You didn't tell me you were in love!"

The fortuneteller tinkled with joyous laughter as Bowser's face only burned redder. He gaped at me as I continued to laugh; Stars! How red was he going to become!? I should make this into a game!

"The king's love unknowingly rebuffs him but he is unyielding and will do as he must to win her! He seems possessive," she mused, "Persevere king and you will have your lady!"

"You get her Bowwy!" I laughed, nudging him.

He sneered at me, "..."

The fortuneteller's eyes glowed wickedly, "And as for your _sex life_—"

"_Thaaaat_'_s_ enough of that!" Bowser squawked. I barked with laughter, nearly in tears. He glared at me through hooded eyes, "Think it's funny do you!? Then let's hear about _your _love life!"

"Very well then," and once again the fortuneteller began her lulling chant until the crystal ball glowed, "Hmm. Interesting."

"Don't spare a _single_ detail," Bowser growled, "since you took _such_ liberty with me."

"Alright. Princess Sarasaland love is a new concept to you. I see the man you shall wed!"

I blushed, "I...I'm gonna get married!?"

"Of course!"

"Am I happy?"

"I'd think so—"

"Tell us who he is!" Bowser roared, slapping his fists against the table.

I blinked, surprised at the outburst as the fortuneteller withdrew a bit. Then a wide grin peeled her lips, "Ah. As a magical entity I have a contract and I cannot explicitly reveal too much of one's future."

"Who says?!" he snapped.

"The NWMA: The National White Mage Association. In order to use magic, we must comply with the contract," she beamed coyly, "but I can _describe_ her husband…?"

"Do it!" We both screamed. I peered at Bowser skeptically.

"_Ooh_," she cooed, staring into the crystal ball harder, "Your future husband is a _powerful_ monarch. He is tall, strong, brave and will be a wondrously loving husband, if not a bit suffocating."

"Have I met him yet?" I asked softly.

She grinned, "Yes you have."

I felt nervous, "Is he...One of my suitors?"

"I believe he is," she smirked wickedly, blue eyes sly.

I laughed, cheeks inflamed, "He sounds amazing!"

"To find your true happiness there are trials ahead," she hummed, "But you have an indomitably strong heart."

My head was spinning; I wonder how accurate her fortunes were? Bowser being in love? That seemed to be a theme that's been popping up with more frequency, but I've met my husband? I've already met him and he's a suitor?! Oh Stars, should I even listen to her fortune or is Bowser right? Is it just a scam or is she right...We left the fortune stand thinking things over.

Bowser was_ never_ silent; he always had something to say because he loved the sound of his own voice. I peered at Bowser whose brows were furrowed, "What do you think of the fortunes? Do you think she was right?"

"I don't know..." He said slowly, shrugging, "I mean think about it: _me_, passionately in love...? Me? _King Bowser_?! Sounds kinda weird, don't it?"

"Fortunetelling is for fun," I smiled, "who knows how true it is!"

"Yeah...who knows," he grumbled, "I just don't trust that pink-haired chick. Something about her rubs me the wrong way."

"What? She's nice!" I laughed.

"She's _weird_," he huffed.

As he walked past a fragrant _okonomiyaki_ stand, he swiped a free meal and began to munch on the Japanese pizza with savage Koopa zeal. Did I mention he's also talking and chewing at the same time? The pizza didn't stand a chance against the might of his reptilian appetite as he licked his claws clean seconds later.

His stomach gurgled loudly and he shot a crazy grin my way, "You know what that means!"

I sighed, though amused, "_Another _burp song Bowser?"

"What song should I burp to you this time milady?_ Magikoopa Had a Little lamb? Three Blind Mousers? The Ittsy Bittsy Wiggler_? Which one Flower?"

I held back laughter, "None of them, especially in public ever again."

Truthfully his disgusting belch-songs were hilarious and usually had me in tears, stomach in knots from laughing so hard by the end of his 'performances.' But I can't let him know that or his ego will go through the roof. It's both fascinating and disgusting how he can belch notes for so long. I _must_ have mental issues if I think this is funny.

Bowser grinned, "Don't you _even _pretend not to like my belch-ballads! I burped an ode to your beauty once and it _rocked_ you!"

My sides hurt from holding in laughter, "And _that's_ when you accidentally blew fire, remember?"

"I was in the zone that day," he chuckled proudly, "I was...Eh? What the hell was I talking about before this?"

I laughed, "The fortuneteller lady."

"Oh right! I mean, fortunetelling by itself is weird but then add in some strange chick with crazy-ass Easter egg-pink hair. And how _does_ she know all that crap about me anyways!? How in the hell did she even...know..."

He choked mid-sentence, realizing his mistake. He had just admitted the fortuneteller was _right_. Bowser's eyes snapped over to me as a dribble of sweat rolled down his cheek. I grinned ruthlessly.

_Checkmate_.

"Ha! So you _are_ in love!" I roared victoriously, turning on him and jamming a finger into his shelled chest. "Tell me! _Tell me who she is!_"

I continued to tug at his elbow and plead as Bowser gaped wordlessly, face burning redder each passing second.

"I'm _not_ telling you!" He growled, cheeks glowing darker.

"You're blushing_ so_ hard!" I laughed so gleefully my lungs were beginning to hurt, "You must _reeeeally_ like her! O Casanovakoopa! _O Koopeo_!"

He growled darkly, mane bristling, "W-Will you just _drop _it?!"

I wiped a tear from my eye and sucked in a breath. "Fine. But I will find out who she is. It's not my cousin?"

"No," he snapped, still embarrassed, "It's not her."

I rolled my eyes, "Fine. I'll quit for now _Lover-Koopa_."

He sneered as I reached to pat his face, "_Aw. _Is _Bowwy-Wowwy _upset? Huh? Is the widdle Kingie maddie-poo?"

"Unless you wanna put a kiss there, then don't reach for my face," he grumbled, playfully slapping my intrusive hand away.

Since Bowser was still pouting, I peered at different games as he trailed behind like a shadow. One game involved trying to catch Cheep-Cheeps with tiny, flimsy nets. I paid a couple of coins and tried my hand. After missing for my fourth consecutive time, I groaned.

"Dammit," I hissed, watching as a wiggling orange Cheep-Cheep swam away.

_The little jerk, all smug and aquatic…_

"The key is a steady grip," the owner beamed.

A long shadow stretched overhead, frightening the multicolored fishies away as blurbs of bubbles rose in their quick departure. I looked up and saw Bowser grinning, "So this is what you're up to eh?"

"I tried this game," I frowned at my broken net, "it didn't look too hard when I first tried it..."

"Sometimes you just need a little butter to go with the _stud-muffin._"

I snorted, laughing hard as he grinned.

"Now then my desert buttercup, move aside so _Big Daddy_ can handle things," Bowser gently nudged me in the shoulder as he scooted towards the game.

In his usual arrogant fashion, Bowser talked a big game, promising to win the 'biggest and best prize.' It was hilarious to watch a massive Koopa trying to hold the tiny fish nets in his huge claws. Every time a fish escaped he would grunt or curse violently and after several rounds my eyes were wet with tears. I got a good laugh off of him.

It was even funnier to watch Bowser try time after time as his nets kept ripping. I laughed, watching as Bowser grew more and more heated with each resulting failure.

"'Step aside so _Big Daddy_ can work, huh?'" I grinned, bumping his shoulder playfully.

"You better be quiet before I carry you off and kidnap you," he growled.

As Bowser grunted and cursed, swinging maniacally at the Cheep-Cheep, I caught a flash of red in my peripheral. Well, well if it wasn't the _hottie _clan leader himself.

Ryu was making rounds at the various booths, talking with the youth and respectfully bowing to his elders. He listened patiently as a baby chewed on his scarf while the parents taught him the secret to delicious miso soup.

Ryu must have caught sight of us as he started to head in our direction. Bowser was wildly swinging away, splashing water and trying to wrestle Cheep-Cheep into his net. Ryu watched everything with his usual air of stoic calm, arms crossed over his torso and posture perfectly straight. If he was amused with Bowser's terrific, showy fails then he was a master at hiding it.

"Ha! _Suck it_!" Bowser crowed with glee, doing the crude pelvis gesture in tandem.

Just when it looked as if he would win, his net ripped and the tiny fish wiggled free. Bowser's victorious smile morphed into disbelief then hilarious seething rage. A thick vein throbbed on his temple as he snarled furiously, throwing an adult temper tantrum.

"_ARGH_! DAMN IT!"

I laughed as Bowser snarled and stomped his foot, "Crap! Damn! Shit!"

"How about I give it a go?" Ryu's voice was velvety smooth.

He dropped a coin on the table and picked up a tiny fish net. He observed the Cheep-Cheeps' erratic movements diligently and on his first try, skillfully scooped up a wiggly Cheep-Cheep. I cooed happily, clapping in applause as Bowser crossed his arms and snorted out a ring of smoke.

"Wow. And he wins _magically_," Bowwy's sarcasm had me laughing, "That just shows how _rigged_ this game is. The frickin' clan leader guy gets a fish on his first try. I call BS."

"The mighty Clan leader has won," the stand owner grinned, "Choose your prize Ryu-dono."

Ryu motioned towards a beautiful flower comb. With the delicate prize in hand, Ryu approached.

"For you _hime,_" he spoke softly, midnight blue eyes darker, "May I?"

I flushed, nodding my consent as he leaned towards me. The pleasant scent of pine flooded my senses as he gently ran a hand through my hair and softly slipped the small comb into my tresses. While he may not have smiled, his midnight blue eyes softened.

"Perfect," his deep voice was silken, "You look _stunning_."

"..._Hee,_" I cooed stupidly.

A faint smile curled upon Ryu's succulent lips as he slowly drew closer, eyes blazing and suddenly alive. I froze, swallowing nervously; don't_ swoon. Don't swoon. Don't swoooooon._

"Ryu-_dono_," A Shinobi materialized out of nowhere in a clot of smoke, "You are needed elsewhere."

"Very well," Ryu may have replied to him, but he didn't take his eyes off of me, "I _will _see you later tonight, _hime_."

I smiled dreamily, "Okay...H-Have fun!"

His expression smoothed over with amusement. With a deep chuckle, he turned and followed after his subordinate. I continued to peer after him with a loopy smile. There probably should have been spinning hearts above my head as I sighed happily.

"Ugh Stars, somebody _shoot me."_

Huh?

"Well now that you two are _done _making googly eyes at each other, I don't feel like I'm going to _hurl_."

Flushing, I peered at Bowser; I completely forgot he was there. The Koopa King's arms were crossed, eyes narrowed, mane bristled and smoke wafting from a single nostril in irritation.

"W-We weren't making _googly_ eyes at each other!" I exclaimed.

"Right…" He growled.

I expected him to smirk and tease me but this time he looked upset. There was no humor, no slippery grin or playfulness. What was up with him?

"H-Honestly! We weren't making googly eyes!"

"You want a handkerchief to wipe that drool off your face!?" He sneered, fangs bared.

"I was _not _drooling over him! I—Hey! Stop trying to ignore me!"

"Trying? Oh I'm not trying, I _am _ignoring you!"

Every time I tried to look at him, he kept turning his back to me. So here we were in the middle of a fair turning and spinning; I bet to an outsider it looked really weird.

"Bowser this is ridiculous!"

"Go find that…_Ryu_ loser since you _love _him so much."

"Come on! I don't l-love him!"

"You blush _every time_ you look at that guy!" He jeered, ruby eyes hooded in shadows, "And tell me that and don't stutter!"

"I d-don't!"

"Yeah right," he rolled his eyes, "And I'm not the King of Koopas."

And with that statement he stomped off, shoving and even throwing unfortunate people out of his way. No matter how many times I bellowed after him, he continued ignoring me.

The last of his gleaming shell disappeared from sight as his tail thrashed and whipped about furiously. His lashing tail caught a poor man in the chest and sent him careening into a pond. Taurus had saw the spectacle and laughed delightedly at the man's misfortune.

_Ugh! What a jerk! Ignoring me like that…_

I stared after him with a frown; what's gotten into him? I've never seen him so riled up over something so trivial. I thought about going after him, but the delicious scent of sizzling foods wafted in the air. Now that I think about it, I am pretty hungry…

"Akage-Chan!" Tora ran over, peering up at me, "Hi!"

"Well hello there!" I bent to be at his level, "What's up Tora?"

Tora had several stuffed animals in arm and his face painted like a tiger. His nose was black and he had whiskers; he looked adorable. "Wanna get something to eat with me? Big brother said not to let you out of my sight!"

I laughed, "Did he now? Well let's go get a bite. What do you want?"

"I want noodles!" he began to jump around excitedly, "I saw those other guys there too!"

And by 'those other guys' he meant Luigi and Wolfesbane. We went to the spicy soba stand where Lulu and Wolfe happily slurped away at their food. At my appearance Luigi smiled, tipping his hat as Wolfe cheered, waving me over animatedly.

To avoid a fight, I allowed Wolfe to buy a small bowl of the soba noodles for me as Luigi bought a shaved ice treat. I bought Tora's bowl and he downed the food with relish and speed. I offered Luigi a bite from my chopsticks and though he blushed, he took a few nibbles. I grinned, "Not bad huh?"

"It's-a delicious," Luigi beamed.

Wolfe harrumphed loudly and with a laugh, I continued to shovel mouthfuls of spicy noodles. I nosily slurped the long noodles, trying to get the stray ends into my mouth. Wolfe's golden eyes glowed rakishly as he leaned in and latched onto a slippery noodle.

Just like the movie _The Koopette and the Tramp_, our lips met in a charming messy kiss. I blushed as Wolfe grinned largely, with Puppo yipping happily. I spat out the noodle in shock and Wolfe slurped up the rest.

"_Ewwww_!" Tora lamented, "Yellow-eyes kissed Akage-chan! _Blech_!"

"Now _those _were the best damn noodles I've had!" Wolfe laughed, cheeks glowing red. He peered at a distant ring, "Some sumo wrestlers are gonna fight soon, wanna see yours truly kick some ass?"

"Go get 'em Wolfie," I cheered as a stray noodle hung out of Tora's mouth. I didn't know what it was about Wolfe, but he just made me feel so at ease, like I could be myself, just like any great guy friend should.

As Wolfe jogged off, heading to the huge sumo wrestler pit, Prince Silver observed an artist's beautiful calligraphy and watercolor artwork. Zero was conversing with the locals, trying to get a feel for their day to day life as Taurus flirted with beautiful women with milk-white skin, dark-red lips and adorned with ornate silk kimonos. _Yeah and this guy thinks I'm gonna marry him. Ugh._

Tora grabbed the sleeve of my kimono and tugged animatedly, his sticky little fingers leaving a few oil stains, "Akage-chan look! The boy with weird yellow eyes is taking on a huge sumo wrestler!"

As Tora pointed out, Wolfe stood in a ring, eyeing a sumo wrestler who was taller and probably three-hundred pounds heavier. Standing at an impressive six-three, it was pretty hard to dwarf Wolfe but this sumo wrestler did it expertly.

The wrestler dropped into his stance, squatting with exaggerated strain and Wolfe copied, laughing as he did so. The referee counted them off and with a 'Go!' they were at each other's necks. They locked arms, wrestling and grappling as they tested each other.

Then the momentum shifted as the crowd watched, Wolfe began to force his opponent out of the ring with monstrous strength. Wolfe was laughing, a feral grin stretched across his face as he manhandled someone nearly three-times his size.

"Wow!" Tora whispered, "Yellow-Eyes is strong!"

The crowd grew deathly silent, jaws dropped in awe as Wolfe edged the sumo wrestler near the brink of the ring. His fur boots dug into the ground, shoulders squared and muscles straining as inch by inch he moved the wrestler closer and closer to defeat. A flicker of furious concentration flashed across his face; with sharp teeth bared and a roar of strain, Wolfe put the four-hundred plus wrestler on his ass and out of the ring.

As the crowd cheered, Wolfe threw his head back and howled in victory. He peered my way and grinned largely, pumping his fist with cheer. Puppo howled happily, stubby tail wagging as Tora cheered loudly. Wolfe returned with a cocky swagger, sliding into his seat with a sultry smirk, trying to be 'smooth.'

"Impressed Princess?" He even tried to use a 'sensual' voice and wiggled his eyebrows. Such a dork.

I laughed as Tora bobbed his head, "Yeah. You were great! I thought you'd get your butt kicked! You look so scrawny."

"Scrawny!?" He frowned, "You aren't even taller than my _shoe_!"

While Wolfe and Tora got into a rather childish argument, Grandpa Ryuunosuke appeared beside me, nearly scaring the crap out of me again; everyone around here had legendary sneaking skills.

"Hey," he smiled charmingly, "Wanna sample some of the best tea you'll ever have?"

"How can we say no to that?" Luigi smiled.

Ryu's grandfather invited us over with a smile. He had successfully wrangled up my suitors, including my ever elusive grandmother. Bowser was still ignoring me as Taurus flirted with an elegant geisha and when that didn't work out he turned to the girl sitting at our table. It turned out she was the pink-haired fortuneteller.

"I vacation at the Del Fino islands ten times a year," Taurus grinned suavely at the fortuneteller who seemed bored, "My family owns a beach side penthouse and a condominium—"

"Princess Daisy!" she smiled over a cup of steaming tea, "We meet again it seems."

"And this time I'm getting your name," I laughed.

She smiled, "I'm Lazinne."

"And I'm Daisy as you already know," I laughed. When I went to offer her a handshake she pulled me in for a hug. She patted the seat beside her, "Come! Sit! I want to know all about my new friend!"

Ryuunosuke worked as a vendor for the festival and served dishes of delicious pastries and a batch of freshly brewed tea. He spoiled Grammy, Lazinne and I by piling our plates with the most pastries. When we reached for wallets, he stopped us steadfastly, "What kind of man would take money from such beautiful ladies? This is on the house."

Luigi looked hopefully, "So we eat-a free too?"

Ryuunosuke laughed, "I'm afraid not. I said _beautiful ladies._"

Zero laughed, "With all that hair I'm sure Wolfe could pass for a girl."

Wolfe grinned sharply, "Would you like to meet my 'girly' fists? No? Then shut up."

So we sat at a table, stuffing our faces with delectable sweets and creamy tea. I learned all about Lazinne who was as wonderful as I thought she would be; she traveled all over the world doing odd jobs and had devoted her life to the art of white magic and becoming a White Mage. She was funny, charming and had a really silly laugh.

"So the next kingdom you're going to is the Darklands? I haven't been in the Darklands before," she hummed thoughtfully, "Maybe I should travel there one day…"

"Speaking of traveling, I remember when I was young and all the missions I took," Ryuunosuke hummed.

"What kind of missions were there?!" Wolfe asked excitedly. He was talented enough to talk and stuff his face at the same time. As he grinned, smears of frosting coated his cheeks. Puppo happily licked his face.

"I'm interested to know as well," Zero spoke, sipping his cooling tea.

"Transport missions, abductions, assassinations, espionage, anything honestly. A protective father once asked me to chaperon his daughter's date."

"That's so cool!" Wolfe grinned, "Did you kick some ass? I bet you did back in the day Gramps."

Though Ryuunosuke rubbed his chin with feigned thought, he smirked arrogantly, "I hate to brag young Canine, but I wasn't head Shinobi for nothing. I was a feared man. Men feared me and women wanted me with a lust so rare."

I broke into laughter as Grammy grinned.

"Such a lady-killer!" Luigi laughed.

"Have you killed before?" Silver asked, eyes wide.

Our table fell silent, even Bowser peered over with interest.

"Of course," the aging Shinobi replied, "It is the path of the Shinobi. But I can say I have used my talents for good."

He peered at me, "And if this old man is not being presumptuous, I believe you'd make a fine Kunoichi_, _Akage-hime."

I smiled, "Because I'm excessively violent?"

"You are fearless and brave. And every Shinobi needs a heart of gold."

Lazinne smiled, "Ah, the silver-tongued old man is right. You do possess a big heart princess and I need no fortunes to see that."

"Sorry to interrupt but I've heard delicious tea is served here."

I grinned as Ryu strolled over. Wolfe and Tora cheered happily as the Canine heir waved, "Ry! It's Star damn time you saw us."

"Well if it isn't the fearless leader!" Gramps grinned, "A free cup on the house."

Ryu took a seat to my right, our shoulders brushed when he sat down; I blushed and tried to look away discreetly. Then a cup of fragrant tea was in his hands as he hummed his approval.

Wolfe continued back up again, "So Kunoichi are girl Shinobi right?"

"Correct young Canine. Most Kunoichi missions involve acting, stealth, precision, procuring Intel and seduction of course. Although handsome Shinobi like my grandson have dabbled in such missions as well."

Again our table grew silent, all eyes on Ryu. The only sign of his growing discomfort was a short lapse of unrestrained movement.

"S-Seduction?" Silver blinked.

"Wow..." Luigi muttered.

Wolfe's eyes glowed sinfully as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. The wicked glee coiffed from him like smoke, "Someone send the kid away, I got some questions for Ry."

Tora frowned, "Hey! No secrets! Only babies keep secrets you big mea—!"

Grammy picked up Tora, "Come here little tiger. Want to hear a funny story?"

Wolfe grinned, "So…You _seduced a girl_ Ry?"

Ryu didn't look uncomfortable, but his posture was unusually stiff. The Dragon of the Hidden Lotus looked a bit uneasy, "..."

"Was she hot man?" Wolfe 'whispered' under his breath. His smile was wicked. The suitors remained quiet, eager to hear Ryu's answer. At least Zero and Taurus pretended not to be interested.

"Yes the clan matron was...attractive. She was a scorned middle-aged wife of a clan leader."

"An older woman huh? Did you have to..._You know_?" Wolfe spoke even softer.

Silver stopped sipping his tea, Zero arched an eyebrow and Ryuunosuke smiled.

"The mission..." Ryu cleared his throat, "the mission was to acquire knowledge of her husband's war tactics and military outpost. And I was to achieve the information as needed."

"That didn't answer-a his question," Luigi looked like he wanted to laugh.

"Thanks Weegeeman! Don't hide it Ry! So you _did_ some hot cougar eh?"

"No..." I thought I saw his face grow a bit red, "We did not have relations...I didn't think it was necessary. The interest of a...young man was more than enough to...Make her reveal what was necessary."

"'Reveal?'" Luigi snickered.

"Was that a pun Ry?" Wolfe laughed.

"No...It wasn't," Ryu suddenly peered at me and he hurriedly looked away, "I…I don't think this is _suitable_ conversation."

Ryu had _seduced_ a target? If I was a Shinobi, a Kunoichi, could I have done such a thing? I was boyish, clumsy and the opposite needed to enchant a man to the deepest depths of asinine lust. But when I thought of seduction and Ryu, the two went together as sweet as honey and milk.

If the handsome face, chiseled physique and the smoky blue eyes weren't enough, then his liquid, feline movements and smooth voice had to slay any sensible woman. Hell, Bowser had the alluring confidence, charm and the right _something_ that demanded feminine admiration and attention. Koopettes fell at his feet with minimal effort.

"We have several volumes of scrolls dedicated to teaching about the art of touch, love and sensuality," Gramps grinned, "Some written by the master himself, a handsome devil named Ryuunosuke. I remember when Ryu turned fifteen and that was the day I gave him his first 'love scroll.' He studied them for hours and hours with rapt interest and—"

"_Grandfather_," though deadpan, Ryu's pointed interruption made the suitors laugh collectively.

Lazinne studied me, her halo of pink fringe spilling over her left eye.

"What is it?" I hummed.

"You could do it easy," Lazinne's melodious voice rang.

"Huh?" I blinked.

She grinned, flicking her long fringe out of her eyes, "You could seduce if you so choose. You'd just need the right demeanor."

Me? _A seductres_s?! No. Now _Peach_ on the other hand would make a good seductress; with her waves of glossy long curls and pearly, pouty-pink lips. Not to mention the tall, statuesque body that drove men to her in flocks.

"Pretty and girly don't suit me, Lazinne."

"Pretty does. And you're right," she hummed, "but confidence and boldness does."

As Wolfe chattered with Silver and Bowser laughed with Luigi, I caught eyes with Ryu. Even with a subtle stare I couldn't ignore the weight of his eyes. Oh yeah, that clan matron was seduced willingly under those pretty eyes. The soft glow left Ryu's stare as he suddenly straightened up. A shadow loomed near me. I turned halfway to meet the stern visage of Ryushen.

"Would you like to join me? I was just thinking of taking a walk." Though polite words suffused his speech, Ryushen's gruff tone made it sound like I had little choice.

I rose to my feet, "Sure."

Ryu halfway rose from his seat but his grandfather stopped him. The old Shinobi waved, "Take care! Make sure to see the sakura trees!"

* * *

><p>I walked beside Ryushen as he glowered against the bright glare of sunlight. He was like my father in the sense that his presence was powerful, intimidating even. He didn't have to be a masterful orator to command respect, there was the proud way he walked and the power behind his stare. He was a man that spoke with action and begrudged petty, meaningless words.<p>

"I won't waste your time or mine. I'd like to know your intentions with my son."

I could feel the weight of his stare like a tangible pressure.

"I want to learn of his culture and see if we are compatible to wed," I answered as honestly as I could. Something told me Ryushen could see-through lies as easy as a Boo could slide through walls.

"We are a clan of elite warriors, Shinobi who dedicate our lives to training and a mastery of honor. Death before dishonor is a code we live and at times, perish by."

I nodded.

His eyes narrowed, "Are you prepared to make sacrifices? My son must marry a strong Kunoichi. Are you willing to spill blood to protect our way of life? Are you willing to protect those who can't defend themselves?"

"If I had to, then yes."

"My son is the best Shinobi of our village. He has surpassed my prowess in my prime and even that of his grandfather. But even Ryu is not impervious to pain. Will you tend him when he returns from battle covered in his own blood? Will you forsake him if he is disfigured? Will you turn away when you see his myriad of scars? My son will need a powerful clan matriarch, a woman who is soft enough to heal but hardened enough to kill thoughtlessly. Is she you?"

"One of my other suitors is a warrior. His name is Wolfesbane, do you remember him sir?"

Ryushen's stare hardened, "The Canine heir? Yes I do."

"I rode into battle with him and when we fought, I wanted to do all in my power to make sure his people came home safe. I feel the same way about your son."

Ryushen grunted, but nodded his head, "There may be a day where Ryu doesn't come back, or that if he does, he returns decrepit."

Surprised, I turned to study the older Shinobi. I never realized it before but he limped, leaning heavily on his cane as he walked.

"No form of medicine can heal me, what if this was Ryu's fate? Cut down in battle and left a burden on you."

"I don't think you're a burden," I whispered fiercely, "I think you're the epitome of what every Shinobi, every warrior should be. You're hurt, permanently wounded but you are proud and stand tall like a true warrior. The people here revere you like a legend. Maybe that wound has stopped you from fighting but it has not ended your great legacy."

Surprise crossed Ryushen's face before his expression lightened, "Hmm. That's how you see things, young lady?"

"Yes, that's what this _Gaijin_ sees."

He laughed gruffly, though a true smile broke forth, "You are not a _Gaijin_, child."

"It means outsider or something, right?"

"True but it implies a sort of distrust. You know, in the Shinobi way we usually marry our children to family friends. For a while I was thinking of the teahouse girl for Ryu, her parents think they would make a fine coupling."

I made a face and Ryushen laughed again, "My son is not complicated, what you see is what you get: a passionate young man who does what he thinks is best. He may be a ruthless warrior but outside of bloodshed he is kind and gentle."

I smiled, "I know..."

He arched an eyebrow, "And as my son is the clan leader, it's high-time he started a family of his own; he is a year older than you I believe. You'd have the task of providing him healthy, fat babies."

I froze; give Ryu children? I thought of the smoldering blue eyes, the arch of his smile and of course that lean, dangerously sculpted physique. _Have kids, with all of that gorgeousness!?_

Oh Stars here come the bad thoughts again. You better believe I blushed badly. The stalwart, battle-hardened Ryushen laughed again. He squeezed my shoulder a bit too rough, "You're a good girl. I had my doubts about you prior."

I huffed, arching an eyebrow, "Thanks...I think."

"I had my doubts about an outsider marrying my son. Would she observe our ways? Most heiresses are coddled and terribly pampered, spoilt little things."

"Trust me, my Father is against pampering. He was stern, and hard on me."

He grunted, "Then he sees something of worth in you. A parent pushes their child when they see their worth."

I thought of what Ryu revealed to me earlier, did his father see him as his son?

"Did you push Ryu?"

"I pushed him beyond his limits and now my son is the best Shinobi bar none," pride glowed upon his face even if he didn't smile.

I smiled; so all doubt and fear aside, he had raised Ryu like a son and not treated him as a burden. After that he didn't have much to say, preferring the sweet sound of peace and happiness floating about the festival. I got the vibe Ryushen was the kind of man who only spoke when needed. Just like Ryu.

We completed our circle and were approaching the Dragon tea tent. Ryu was already standing by for my arrival. He looked unsure but when I smiled and waved, his effortless cool returned. Ryushen jerked his head towards his son and though he didn't smile, he spoke with humor, "He looks like a lost puppy. See what he wants will you?"

I laughed, "I will. Take care."

I bowed before turning to join Ryu.

"Did it...Go well?" He sounded slightly uneasy.

"Nah, he hates me and would rather eat slugs than see us marry."

Ryu grinned, "Sarcasm, a favorite weapon of the Kunoichi."

* * *

><p>All participants of the fair were rounded up to watch a traditional play. We were herded to an outdoor theater which overlooked a sparkling lake. I sat next to my suitors as the play unfurled. It was a love story about a powerful Silver Dragon king—Ryuunen; he was strong, loyal, genius and a fair ruler to his people. One day when he went to the sacred lake for a drink of cool water, he met a beautiful water nymph. The nymph—Leiko—was a princess of an underwater kingdom.<p>

It was forbidden for land dwellers to even know of her kind, but she couldn't resist the charming dragon. The more time they spent together, the more the dragon and the water nymph grew to love each other. The play was beautifully written; there were moments that were hilarious—like when the Silver Dragon tried to peek on the bathing Water Nymph—intense moments, and the fight between the Silver Dragon and the water nymph's fiancée Shen, was heated!

_'Shen please!' _Leiko sobbed,_ 'Let us leave in peace. The dragon king must return to his people.'_

_'I won't leave without you Leiko,' _the silver dragon king growled_, 'I love you and I shall not return to my throne without you!'_

_'You love her? How absurd,' _Shen huffed_, 'Princess Leiko is my fiancée and the future queen of the Jei kingdom and she…'_

Bowser, Wolfe and Luigi leaned forward, eyes diligently watching every move.

"_SHE IS WITH MY CHILD!_"

"NO WAY!" Bowser gasped, slamming down both of his fists in shock, "Totally didn't see THAT comin'!"

There was a flood of chuckles at his outburst and even muffled 'shhs!' thrown out halfheartedly. Grandpa Ryuunosuke laughed at the King Koopa's exclamation.

"Bowser shush!" I hissed softly, elbowing him a bit in the gut.

"Seriously, did you see that coming?" he whispered back to me, "Heh, this stuff is actually kinda good…"

"I know, right!?" I smiled.

"By the way," Bowser grinned at me, incisors sharp, "You're _way_ hotter than the lead chick. Leiky? Or something."

I blushed, "You mean the nymph princess Leiko?"

No way was he correct about that one, the actress was made up and was far more beautiful than I could ever dream of being; she had smooth milk-white skin that glowed under the lights, perfect pink bow lips, sultry dark eyes and a lithe figure that had a few of my suitors staring at her a bit _too_ long.

I rolled my eyes, "Oh, let's just watch the show."

This was some really good stuff! Way better than Peach's soaps even! _Yeah, her soaps kinda sucked; every episode someone got slapped for no reason. _Just as an eminent face off began, I felt a light tap on my shoulder.

I glanced over and saw Ryu smirking at me. He motioned me to follow and I was surprised I could do so without my other suitors noticing. I followed him as we walked side by side on a winding stone trail. The sky glowed violet, night temperate as the stars shone like jewels. He asked if I enjoyed my stay.

I told him how much fun I had and how I admired the honesty of his citizens and the beauty and elegance of his culture. Although he didn't smile, his eyes crinkled contently. We stopped our walk when we approached a spot by the lake. I gasped at the sight of a large, beautiful pink sakura tree. It was right below the golden full moon.

I have never seen a tree with such extraordinary coloring. Its blossoms were rosy like the color of carnations and flowers. Hmm, my father was named after these beautiful petals. Was that why? Because they were elegant and beautiful? And I'm named after a flower, but what makes the daisy so special?

Ryu took my hand; his blue eyes were soft under the moon's touch and nearly violet in color. A light wind carried his scarf in the wind's breeze along with a few stray sakura petals. And then there was a flood of fragrant pink petals falling from the sky.

At this moment in time, it looked as if the sky was raining beautiful petals upon us. I laughed, taking in the wondrous sight. I thrust my palms forward and cupped the delightful, soft petals in hand. They smelt wonderfully fresh and aromatic.

"This is the tree of _Ai_," Ryu spoke softly, "It is rumored once upon a time, these pink leaves were green. Legend has taught us that the love goddess enchanted this tree and under her power the leaves became pink. Any couple who stands here under a full moon will be mesmerized with a spell."

I blushed under his tender gaze, "A-And what spell is that?"

"To fall in love," he whispered with a purr, "This is the same spot where my father proposed to my mother. I do not wish something too drastic yet but…I know someone special when I see them _Deiji-hime_."

I knew I was blushing and hurriedly looked away. But Ryu brought a finger to my chin and lightly tilted my head up. Our eyes met and I found myself falling, hopelessly sinking deeper into those beautiful violet pools.

"You could be my queen," he spoke softly, his deep voice a purr.

"Y-You want me as your queen?" I whispered.

Amused, he arched an eyebrow as I continued, "Because I-I'm clumsy a-and an outsider –and you're really…"

"You're beautiful," He paused and drew closer, voice deepening with each passing word, "graceful," he came closer, as my face glowed red, "like no other", he was so close all I could see were his pretty dark eyes, "and exceptional as you are, _Hime_."

I was momentarily stunned by the passion lacing Ryu's tender voice, but the smooth sound gently drew me back into the moment, "I could make you a powerful clan matriarch and I could teach the forbidden arts of my clan. You would not need anyone to protect you. I would be a kind and loving husband. Keep these thoughts with you."

_Yeah, and you'd get to have that friggin' buffybody to enjoy…_

At his words I blushed harder. His hand pressed lightly against my back, drawing me nigh. _Oh Stars this was it. Ryu was going to kiss me. _I never felt more nervous; my throat was parched and palms clammy. My heart raced frantically, cheeks aflame as our faces drew close.

One moment I'm peering into those dark eyes and the next our lips met softly. His lips melted like butter as he held me close. Even from lightly touching him, I could feel the strong, firm muscles under his shirt. His hands moved to my hair and with a slight tug he removed the delicate hairpins. My hair cascaded onto my shoulders in a puddle of red curls. Ryu kissed me deeper as a flood of warmth roiled in the pit of my stomach.

His hands carefully smoothed over my cheek, pulling me closer as our lips danced. I nearly lost my mind when he gently nibbled my lower lip. I sighed, nails raking against his sleek back.

"Oh Stars..." I breathed.

As my nails dug deeper into his back, I was surprised by his reaction. He picked me up and continued our passionate kiss. I didn't know what I was doing but the passion was overwhelming and heady.

"Ryu..."

He set me back onto my feet. His blue eyes were ablaze and for once his true emotions were legible. I only pulled away when I lost my breath, cheeks aflame and temperature boiling. For a change I was surprised, and secretly pleased to see Ryu wasn't perfectly composed for a change. Even under the tan of his golden skin he was pleasantly flushed.

"Wow. That was rather_ nice_..." he whispered softly.

"Is it hot out here or is it just_ you_?" I gleamed.

Then I thought about that, "That sounded _totally_ lame didn't it?"

Then we both laughed. I poked his stomach playfully; Stars was he made of rock or something? Surprisingly he laughed. Oh my! The hardass clan leader was ticklish. With a smirk he removed my hand. I tried to tickle him again but he shut me down.

"So Mister Serious Guy has emotions huh?"

He smirked, "Everyone does."

"Well you don't show them."

"It is a weakness for Shinobi to show emotion."

"Even around me?" I asked softly.

"Only the wife of the clan leader will know her husband's true emotions," he spoke softly, a calloused thumb touching my face.

His eyes were nearly violet, discerning and watchful. I blushed, averting my stare.

"Can you see yourself as my clan matriarch?" he asked softly.

_Uh duh!_

"I…I can," I whispered, smiling coyly.

He pulled me closer and our lips met again.

"Oh…? You like that do you?" He laughed.

"You better not be using any of that 'seduction' secret stuff!"

"And if I am?"

"Ryu!"

"…I'm joking. _Sort of_."

* * *

><p>Bowser snarled ruthlessly, fists crunching a fresh bouquet of purchased flora. He had seen the whole scene: the walk around the gaudy pink tree, heard every sappy word the ugly clan leader spoke but worst of all...<p>

He saw them kiss. Those pathetic Shinobi hands had touched _his girl_ and a nauseating flush of lustful pheromones flooded the air like a sweltering stench. As he watched them walk away, the last of his restraint unwound like frayed thread.

_She is mine_.

The savage, bloodthirsty element of being a Koopa was something he despised and struggled with. It surfaced, as subtle as a shadow slipping across the moon. The urge was alive and well, demanding he go and bleed out that pathetic Shinobi and stake his claim with his mate.

_Kill the Shinobi._

_Mark the girl._

_Mate the girl._

_Puncture her jugular._

His blood boiled, pulse pounding to the savage desire of his beastly instinct. His mouth watered at the thought of ripping the insolent Shinobi apart with his claws, flesh tearing and jowls filling with the clan leader's warm, salty blood.

And then he would find his little minx and mark her as his. With a bite, a puncture to the jugular was how Koopa marked their mates and she was _his_. Bowser cracked his neck and when his eyes reopened, his pupils were long and thin, completely reptilian. He was the Darklandian king and would not be denied what he wanted.

* * *

><p>Ryu and I walked back to Dragon manor with an easy air of happiness and sparking romance. Around each other we could ignore the strain of royal burden and be a bit of our true selves; Ryu was a bit of a show off, effortlessly pumping single-armed push-ups as I was a terrible klutz.<p>

We had competitions; he was impressed I could do one-handed cartwheels as he could do impressive handstand push-ups. He slyly tried to get me to try a handstand but I saw through his devilish ruse; I was in a kimono that wore like a dress and I wouldn't be doing any of _that_.

We came upon the stellar glory of the Dragon manor where reality and unyielding rules awaited. Soon I would have to be a well-behaved desert princess and Ryu would be the undaunted, emotionless clan leader.

"This is where the fun ends, Ryu," I breathed.

"I guess. Well it's better this way."

I peered at him sullenly. He grinned, "You were getting obliterated out there. Your back flip was terribly rusty."

I laughed, "Shut it Ryu-_dono_."

"You can call me Ryu-_sama_."

"Huh?"

He laughed, shaking his head, "I'll let you figure it out _Deiji_."

He leaned in for one last touch, one last kiss. It was over too soon and now we were walking back to reality. His posture was stalwart and powerful as I was yet again walking with the delicate steps of a princess.

Ryu bowed formally, biding a good night before he went to his quarters. The maids took me to my room; Grammy had retired in the next room over. I washed the makeup from my face, stripped out of the elegant kimono and changed into a simple night robe. I padded out of the bathroom, humming happily as I brushed my wild hair into some semblance of order.

"_Where have you been_?" A deep, masculine voice growled.

I gasped, hurriedly slapping my loose robe completely shut. Red eyes narrowed, "Where have you been?"

My heart leapt to my throat, "Bowser! Stars you scared me!"

He stood in the shadows, arms crossed and eyes burning, nearly aglow in the cloak of darkness. Had he been there the whole time? I couldn't have missed him...Bowser blew a flame, lighting a candle as he moved forward. His eyes were unusually sharp, "Enjoy your night with the jerkoff?"

I blinked, "What...?"

He stepped closer and sniffed the air. Sneering, Bowser snorted a clot of smoke, "Ugh, you _reek_ of that Shinobi. You're saturated with his awful scent. How long did you let him shove his tongue down your throat?"

Offended, I snapped, "I k-kissed him! We didn't do anything disgusting!"

"I think," Bowser's claw touched my face, "Anytime you let those idiots touch you it's disgusting. You're mine Flower. _Mine_."

His eyes burned like flames, intense and hot. Bowser loomed over me with those smoldering eyes and I felt like prey. The intensity of his anger, the glow of his eyes; he was scaring me. I stepped away, "Bowser..."

But he moved forward, eyes alive with electricity, "Do you have feelings for him?"

"That's_ none_ of your business!" I snapped indignantly.

The underlying simmering rage broke into a frothing boil as his expression contorted wildly, "You are my business and I will kill that human if he touches you again."

I froze, "Bowser..."

"I will rip out his throat, I will enjoy bathing in his warm, salty blood as I drain him of life," he growled, looming closer.

My Stars, what's wrong with him?! This was not Bowser. I stumbled backwards; he was purposefully backing me into a corner. His eyes were searing, wild as he shoved a wardrobe out of his way. Any furniture he knocked out of his path, sending it smashing rancorously against the wall.

"What?" He laughed darkly, "Didn't think I would notice? You've let _each_ of those losers kiss you."

I had been backed into a corner with nowhere to run as the brunt of Bowser's wild ire raged precariously. His eyes were different, orange and wild as if possessed by fire; even his voice was rougher, guttural. Where was all this coming from?! He was out of control, almost like the Koopa moon or the spectacle with the Ninji, only this time I was the reason for his vicious fury.

And when I was backed into a corner—literal or proverbial—I clawed and kicked my way out. The infectious heat of anger spread as I growled, "This is _my_ courtship! I can kiss whomever I want!"

His eyes narrowed, "Do it and I'll maim them. My claws will run red gloriously."

I went to move away but he slammed an arm above my head, caging me in. His face was inches away as I fell deathly quiet.

"I will kill those _feosauros_ if they touch you again," he growled, orange irises ablaze with wrath, "I will disembowel them, you hear me?!"

"Bowser..." A roil of anger, fear and trepidation stewed uneasily in the pit of my stomach.

"Makes me question how chaste the prude tomboy really is."

A surge of anger and embarrassment heated my face, "How dare you—"

"_You're mine_," he snarled, eyes blazing.

As he glared, teeth bared, his tail had wrapped around my thigh possessively, squeezing till the point of pain. I winced, trying to move away when there was nowhere to go.

"Bowser," I whispered, edging away as far as I could, "y-you're scaring m—"

"I'll be damned if my mate let's other males touch her like a tramp. So suddenly guys start showing interest and you become desperate? How long will it be? How long is it gonna take for that Shinobi to get between those pretty long legs?—"

I slapped him. My hand smarted, throbbing as he drew back, eyes wide. Tears lined my eyes as I panted; I had to get away. My best friend thought I was a tramp. The burn of his words hurt far worse than any kind of physical blow. **"**NO!" I screamed as loudly as I could, jabbing an accusing finger at him. "Y-You will never speak to me like that again!"

I rushed past him but Bowser reacted quickly, reaching out and grabbed my arm, "Flower! Wait...I—"

"No! Let me go!" I desperately jerked my elbow away to escape him, but he gently held firm.

"I-I didn't mean that!"

"Let go!" I felt betrayed, hot tears stinging my eyes, "Y-You think I'm a s-slu—"

"No! No, not at all..." he released a sigh, "I don't...I'm... Flower...Will you stop trying to run?"

It was futile, I knew that. I wasn't going to break away from his monstrous strength. But I was just so angry. I slumped, shoulders sagging as I stared at the floor.

"What?" I barely whispered.

"Look," Bowser sighed, "I just don't...Like the idea of you being with someone else. It drives me crazy. It is literally driving me crazy. I've just said a bunch of shit I don't even believe."

I glared, "You said I'm being easy!"

"Easy? You!? Hell no! If anything you're 'extra difficult!' Like 'master-level apply only'," he laughed, "I, King Bowser, have been a way bigger Koopa-whore than you have ever been. I admit to my past slutty ways."

I tried not to laugh; I was supposed to be angry. I turned away and moments later his large claws gripped my shoulders. He turned me to face him, red eyes soft.

"Come on now, baby. Look at me. I'm sorry," he growled softly. I was surprised when he affectionately nuzzled his nose against mine, purring loudly.

Surprisingly I blushed, peering into the intent red eyes of the king. I bit my lip, tears reforming in my eyes. "W-Why did you freak out like that? You know good and well my council wants me to marry soon. They think if I become too old no one will...w-want me."

"What?! Okay maybe when you're seventy! Even then that may not be true, how old is Grammy? I've seen plenty of men hitting on her—"

"They want me to produce an _heir_ Bowser," I hiccupped, my cheeks glowing.

He arched a red eyebrow, "So all of this is to secure an heir?"

I nodded. Bowser's mien was pensive, "Hmm..."

"This has been stressful enough, those Lotus Senators _hate_ me. I'm always being scrutinized for flaws, it's exhausting," I sighed, "You're the last person I need to fight with. When things are right with you, I can handle everything else."

His expression relaxed. The last strain of ire dissolved from my being. I sighed, "Bowser you didn't have to overreact."

"I hate seeing you go out with other guys," he sneered, pointedly looking away.

"You're always going to be special no matter what. I just can't believe you got so carried away."

"For some odd reason I cannot and will not explain, you destroy my badass sensibilities," he sighed.

I laughed soggily, shrugging, "Sorry."

"Sorry my scaly ass."

I laughed harder. What Peach told me suddenly bubbled into existence; as I laughed, Bowser was trying to hide his smile. He even consciously stopped his tail from wagging.

"You stopped smiling," I pointed out.

"...Huh?"

"You smiled and stopped, why?"

"_Think_ about how stupid that sounded. I did _not_ try to hold back a smile."

"You did!"

"That's just la—"

There was a knock beside my wall, "_Deiji-hime_? Is everything alright? We have come to check on you."

"Uh...Yes I'm fine."

"There was loud clamor...Is everything okay?"

I coughed, "I...uh…tripped over the rugs?"

Bowser cut an incredulous glare at me as I shrugged; I know, I'm a terrible liar. There was silence and then, "Very well then. Sleep well Princess Daisy…"

The feet padded away, disappearing into silence.

"I'm surprised that lame-ass lie worked."

I glared at Bowser, "Oh yeah? Well I wouldn't have said that "lame-ass lie" if you didn't throw furniture!"

He smirked, "I don't know how you express anger but nothing says 'I'm pissy' more than an overturned table."

I tried not to smile. Bowser mimicked my voice in an unflattering falsetto, he even placed his hand on his hips in girlish gusto, "_You stopped smiling teehee_!"

I gaped, "I do _not_ sound like that!"

He continued, "Like _omiStars_ I do not sound like that!"

Fine. Two can play that game. I began to stomp around, growling and sneering, "_Grrr_! I'm Bowser and I'm the stud-muffin king!" I flexed, making sure to kiss my bicep 'muscles'.

This caused him to bellow with laughter, "Not bad! Your voice needs to be a tad bit more masculine and sexy but the attitude is definitely there."

I rolled my eyes, "Well then your Studliness, you can go now. I need beauty sleep."

"You don't need a second of it." He winked, turning and stomping towards the exit. Just as he reached the doorframe, he halted.

I stared at the glinting spiked spines of his shell. Bowser barely turned his head, peering at me over his shoulder. When he spoke, his voice was soft, "Sleep well Flower. And again...Sorry for being an ass-shell."

I smiled, "You're forgiven Bowwy."

He sneered, "I'll let that slide just this _once_."

His expression softened as I smiled, "Goodnight Bowser. I'm glad we're not mad at each other anymore."

"Me too," he purred, "Sleep well _Purga_."

The foreign word filtered through my brain like mist;_ Purga_? What did that mean? And with that he closed the door softly. I could not believe myself. How the _hell_ could I just forgive him like that? If it had been anyone else, their ass would have been ground beef by now. What was it about him that was just so _damnably forgivable!?_

I huffed a deep breath, and as I got ready for bed, the fortuneteller's words floated back into my head_. Had I really met my future husband? Was he really just sitting right under my nose while I was oblivious like some brain-dead Cataquack?_

_And was Bowser really madly in love with someone?_ I scoffed aloud at the thought. Bowser didn't fall madly in love. It just wasn't him. The next stop will be in the Darklands, can't wait to see what Bowwy will have in store. As a wave of exhaustion washed over me, I climbed into bed and pulled the covers over my head. I immediately was sacked.

* * *

><p>It was far later that night as Bowser tossed and turned, grumbling in his sleep as he was far away in dreamland. A couple of times he gave his pillow haymakers, punching so hard the fluff of his pillow sprayed into the air in a flutter of pillow down.<p>

He turned over again as his errant tail slapped Wolfe in the face again. Wolfe growled, pulling the pillow over his head. Bowser turned over again and his tail slapped his other cheek.

Fed up, Wolfe popped up, half-awake, pissed off and hair wildly askew. He glared at Bowser through heavily-hooded, sleepy eyes. _This is total Goomba crap!_ I've been kicked and punched by this big turtle bastard. I'm in a separate bunk bed, how the hell is he hitting me!? Screw this, I'ma get some water and go to sleep…Hopefully.

As Wolfe left, he peered at Bowser who laughed wickedly in his sleep; what kind of dream was he having anyways?!

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><p><em>Flower was chained to a bed. She gasped, before struggling with girlish gusto,<em> "Mph! I-I can't move!"

"Because you're just right where I want you!" _A deep, creepy voice sang._

_Flower gasped,_ "W-Who is that?! Show yourself, fiend!"

_Slowly, slipping from the darkness was the evil, foul, but particularly hideous Ryu. He was short, had a potbelly and wore way too tight leather for his globule body. Ryu loomed over the princess like an ominous cloud, his bodily stench making Daisy's eyes water. When he smiled, he was missing several teeth._

"R-Ryu?! What do you want from me, you lout?" _The naïve, pretty princess whispered, trembling with fear._

"Hehe," _the perv licked his cracked lips, oily blue eyes glowing wickedly_, "isn't it obvious my pretty? You are mine! And you will bear my children!"

_Realizing his dastardly intention, the chaste maiden blushed, ripe with indignant womanly fury. She turned her head away, she couldn't bear the thought of him touching her_, "Y-You cur! I will not b-bear your children! For I love someone else!"

"Lies!" _Ryu snarled, revealing rows of yellow teeth,_ "You are mine! Mine! Now then shall we have some fun? I even brought some chocolates to set the mood my dearest!" _He wiggled his unibrow like a fuzzy caterpillar._

_Flower sobbed_, "Oh! Oh help! Help! Someone help me please!"

_As Ryu began to inch towards the helpless maiden, the door was ruthlessly kicked in, flew across the room and smacked Ryu. Being hit by the door was an_ improvement_ to his looks._

"Grr!? Who could that be?!" _Ryu spat, rubbing his smarting side._

"Leave her alone, doofus."

_The tall, handsome, muscular, heroic form was none other than..._

"K-King Bowser!" _Flower gasped with cheer, nearly orgasmic. Her cheeks glowed at the sight of her handsome, hunky crush._

_Stars, was King Bowser studly and sexy._ _Ryu almost wet himself. No really, he almost did. He gulped audibly_, "K-K-King Bowser?!"

"If anyone's giving Flower a baby," _he smirked devilishly_, "Then it'll be me."

_Flower blushed carnation-pink, charmed he would think of her so_, "B-Bowser...Oh my! Must you be so daring?! So bold?! So sensual?! He's so handsome and manly and rugged..."

"No!" _Ryu pouted_, _unibrow drawn in a 'U' with his anger,_ "Daisy will only love me! Me! So what if I'm not handsome, or smart or buff?! Who cares if I sniff my own armpits?! And who cares if I chew rocks and eat toe jam in my spare time?! I will fight you for her!"

_The handsome Koopa king rubbed his head tiredly_; _he didn't really want to hurt the poor man._ _Ryu had absolutely nothing going for him: he was completely stupid, ugly and his breath smelled like Petey Piranha's jock strap,_ "Look Ryu, I don't want to hurt you..."

_But Ryu charged, screaming like a demented sissy as he rushed the illustrious king with wimpy flailing fists. Before Ryu could throw a single punch, Bowser grabbed him out of the air and gave him an atomic wedgie._

_Wow, he wore a pink thong that said 'sassy'..._

_Hmm._

_Ryu-no baka shrieked in a falestto. Bowser brought the ugly, short guy to his face_, "Leave my girl alone. Got me?"

"Y-Yes!"

"What's my name? What's. My. **_Name_**!?" _Bowser growled._

"B-Bowser!"

_With a smirk, Bowser dropped the short loser on his ass and watched as he waddled away, crying. Ryu squeaked, running away like a pansy. Bowser turned and arched a dashing eyebrow, _"You know…Despite being a loser, he **_does _**have good taste."

_Flower blushed, turning her head away, _"Oh Stars Lord Bowser! M-Must you be so bold and manly!?"

_He strolled over to her cockily and_ _effortlessly ripped the rope binding Flower._ _She was breathless, cheeks red_, "K-King Bowser..."

_The suave king smirked. Daisy swooned, eyes fluttering; his masculine beauty overwhelmed her._

"Come on now Doll-face, you know to call me Bowser."

"How can I ever thank you," _Flower gasped breathlessly_, "I-I'm just a woman and you are a godly stud-muffin. How can I ever repay you my liege?"

"I've got an idea," _the king purred, his voice sending trills of glee to the princess._

_They slowly drew closer as Flower shivered with want, cheeks glowing brighter with each passing second. The suave king smirked, moving painstakingly closer; he enjoyed toying with the beautiful princess._

"K-Kiss me," _she breathed._

_And that was all he needed. The handsome king leaned forward with a lady-killing growl and kissed her sweetly._

_And then..._

_They began to make-out passionately, rolling, roving hands and slurp-city galore_.

"Oh Bowser!" _Flower purred,_ "_Oh Bowser_! Oh yes Bowser! Oh yes! Oh! Yes! Yes! Yes!"

* * *

><p>Wolfe yawned loudly, grumbling as he carried a swinging lantern back to the shared bedroom. He closed the rice door softly and blinked when he saw Bowser wildly making out with his pillow. Was he even throwing in some tongue?!<p>

"Aw, gross man," Wolfe groaned, squinting an eye shut, "Dude's tonguing down some chick in his dreams."

Bowser continued to passionately make out, rolling until he fell out the bed with a loud thud. Somehow that didn't wake him up.

"Mmm," Bowser purred sleepily, "Mmm…Naughty girl you..."

Wolfe blinked before laughing.

* * *

><p>Alice: Wowie-Zowie that was a long chapter! O_O<p>

Ultrra: Bowser's beast came out, that's for sure! O_O I thought Ryu was gonna die! And Bowser's love fortune and dream were AWESOME XD

Alice: LOL! Off to the Darklands next! ;) Leave a review and see ya next chapter!


	25. Kingdom Tour: Darklands

Alice: OMIGOSH! Long chapter ahead! I shortened this so no one should complain! (nods) Also of notice, of all the suitors Ryu's chapter was the most read. XD

Ultrra: Long Chapter, so short A/N note right?

Alice: Right! XD

Ultrra: 1) Daisy just _might_, just _maybe_ might like Ryu _juuuust _a little bit.

Alice: LOL! Only a liiiiittle bit.

Ultrra: Oooonly a liiiiiiittle bit. X) 2) Wolfe keeps it real! I can't see a kid Kitsune raising as being a punk XD lol 3) Ugh...I kinda..._like_ Ryu and I'm ashamed to admit it! X)

Alice: XD Yeeeeeeeah!

Ultrra: Who would win in a fight between Wolfe and Ryu?

Alice: Wow, that's a good question. O_O I'll leave that to the reviewers and see what they think! Also four things: 1) If you're ever wondering _'Alice, when the HECK are you going to update this STORY!_?' (points) See my profile. XD _PLEASE!_ Periodically I will update my status.

2) We have fanart from the awesome **CJZilla!** That is _ALSO_ on my profile. That's reason number two why you should attack my profile and 3) I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I worked my tush off on this chapter! O_O; I'm serious, I think I lost weight. XP Take breaks if you must but it's just a little bit longer than Ryu's chapter. 4) AAAAAAAAAAAAnd now, I'm gonna pass out. This chapter was ALOT of work! But it was FUN work. XD Enjoy the read!

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Ten Months Ago...<em>**

_This shitty scene was one he had grown far too accustomed; the sky burning red from fire with thick, padded billows of dark smoke, his castle torn asunder in smoking debris and his wounded troops littered about, groaning from their injuries and the lesser of them suffering from psychiatric issues._

"H-He jumped on my head! My head! Why though!? Whyyyyyyyy_!?_"_ A hammer bro sobbed into his fellow soldier's arms._

_With a heavy groan, Bowser gingerly pulled himself to his feet; his battered body screamed its protest as a white-hot bolt of pain blazed up his spine. His face smarted and he was sure he was developing one helluva a nasty shiner over his left eye—and he was. It was an injury he'd complain about ruining his handsome visage for weeks to come._

_The metallic taste of blood filled his mouth with an unpleasant bitterness and with an impatient snarl, Bowser growled roughly, spitting the foul taste from his mouth._

_"Sonnuvabitch_ that plumber can fight..."

_Speaking of plumbers, that midget was sooo dead when he got his hands of him. Bowser ground his smarting jaw painfully, glaring fiercely; once again Mario had forcibly spoon-fed him—the Koopa king—a huge douse of whoop-ass. He was left to agonizingly digest the awful taste of defeat. It was embarrassing, painful and cost millions that were...surprisingly replenish-able._

_Though his jaw was swollen, he growled thickly,_ "When I get my hands on that little bastard I'm gonna..."

"Mario!" _The sweet lilt of Peach's saccharine voice halted his violent reproach._

_Bowser's head whipped to the side, arms trembling with strain as Peach's slender silhouette appeared. The luminous sun ignited behind her champagne-blonde curls with an ethereal halo, her skin glowed with the pearlescent beauty of the moon and her hair shimmered and cascaded down her back like liquid gold._

_All she needed were wings of gossamer and she could make any angel acrid with envy. She strolled past Bowser, never sparing a glance his direction as she slipped to Mario's side. The king watched Peach weep over Mario, tears glittering like diamonds._

_A hot flare of jealousy twisted his chest as noxious as boiling acid. _He _was the one that got his ass kicked! She should be worried about him—_

"Stars Mario," _she sobbed_, "I hate to see you fight. I hate seeing every wound you take. I was worried so..."

_Peach carefully peeled off a pristine, expensive glove made of the finest silk and pressed it to Mario's busted lip without second thought. It was made of material worth more than an entire year of Mario's plumbing salary._

"But I have to help you-a!" _Mario sported a black-eye of his own and tattered clothing_, "If you're okay Princess then-a I'm okay..."

"Why?" _she whispered, big blue eyes glowing with warmth and_ something _Bowser couldn't place_.

"Because..." _He looked away and blushed._

"Because what?" _Peach whispered softly._

"I..." _Mario's cheeks glowed red as Bowser sneered wickedly; well, well, plumber McDickweed blushed around the pretty princess did he? If Bowser could get up and punch Mario again he would. No one lusts over his princess._

_Peach's face glowed in a flush of marvelous pinks before she took hold of Mario's collar and pulled him in for a kiss. This wasn't a chaste peck on the cheek as usual, this was a deeper caress; her lips met his. Bowser's jaw unhinged inelegantly as the plumber gaped, eyes wide as his blush burned a deeper red._

_When Peach removed her pink, dewy lips, both hero and fair maiden were red and panting. They locked eyes and stared at the other as if everything else around them didn't matter. Then a flood of pheromones ripe with their attraction sprayed into the air like a fine mist as they kissed again, with much more vigor and passion._

"I...I don't know what I'd do if I lost you," _Peach sobbed_.

"Peach... I love you. _Sei tutto per_ me. You are-a everything to me_._ I'm not going-a anywhere," _Mario's voice was feather-soft and bubbling of adoration._

_Bowser's expression morphed from stupor to a resolute, grim realization. They loved each other. No matter how much he kidnapped her or tried to please her, Peach would never look at him the same way she did Mario. Each moment she set eye upon the hero, she flushed pink with pleasure and her eyes twinkled like stars._

_She _loved_ him._

_And he loved her._

_The revelation of their mutual love wasn't unexpected but it crushed him nonetheless. For years he had been trying to a win a girl who belonged to someone else. For years she had looked straight through him and imagined Mario. And when Bowser burst with bold declarations of his love for her, Peach had smiled with a counterfeit, forced sympathetic smile of someone who pitied a fool. He had loved her!_

_Everyday he dreamed of having her as a wife; she would have been the perfect trophy bride with pretty features, delicate mannerisms and the need for his mantle of protection. If Bowser had to take over her kingdom to get her attention, then that's what he did damn it!_

_He poured himself into planning raids, spent tireless nights plotting schemes and picking out the cutest cages for her—some of his selections were so damn cute and frilly, his staff would have questioned his masculine badassness if they knew he was behind it all. He never took Peach's girlish no's and shrieks of terror as a resolute rejection. But now it was so painfully clear. He had been wasting his time with a girl who...would never love him._

_He would always remain bereft of Peach's prized affection. It felt as if an invisible hand had stealthily snaked into his chest cavity and squeezed his heart until it splattered. As Mario and Peach found a new, blossoming affection in the rubble of a torn castle, the king hung his head, grimacing as the cold hand continued its ruthless, painful clamp on his heart._

_Even when Kamek and Kammy came to assist him from the broken rubble, he was barely conscious of anything but the aching squelch of his heart. The following month was the Toadstool Tour Tennis Tourney hosted by the gracious Mushroom Kingdom._

_Bowser's lethargic slog had most of the maids and Koopalings concerned; usually after Mario rescued Peach he would pout and remained surly for a few days but then he was back to being his cocky, devil-may-care self. But this time he had schlepped on for a month like a zombie, eating with little relish, his normal passionate zeal for bedlam and crass sense of humor vanquished._

_Kammy had gently nudged His Cantankerousness into attending the tournament, hoping that his natural love of competition would force him out of his slump. But that did little good. He had been too depressed to even do his signature 'facials' against opponents; get right up on the net, rear back and then BOOM faaaaacial!_

_Bowser had quietly gotten his ass kicked soundly and now he was two games in the hole. Even though the sky was blue, sun shimmering like a diamond and the weather perfect, Bowser remained dejected. He hunkered down in the middle of a sidewalk, festering in his dark bubble of depression. He sighed, head rested against his palms as he stared at the ground forlornly._

_"One is the loneliest numberrrrrr..." he half sang, half blubbered off-key._

_Most Toads steered clear of him and didn't dare to come within ten feet of him, even if Bowser was moping in the middle_ of the _road; a depressed Bowser was still a dangerous Bowser in their eyes. The king sighed deeply again but then blinked, realizing a pair of tiny orange and yellow sneakers stopped before him._

"_Excuse me_, you're blocking the road."

_He peered up, and even sitting on the sidewalk, he was nearly taller than the frowning human girl. He peered at her closer; where Peach had creamy, milk-white skin, her complexion was tan like a mocha latte. Her umber complexion made her blue eyes radiant and her hair was wild, tresses a rich dark red, bordering mahogany. And she was cute._

_Real _cute.

_Curious, he sniffed her discreetly and was surprised her pheromones signaled her as unmated. Red actually had the nerves to glower at him. She tapped her foot impatiently,_ "Do I have a sign on my forehead that says 'Please stare at me like an idiot?!'"

_He blinked, taking in the way her eyes seem to illuminate brighter in her vexation._

"Are you going to move?!" _She gestured_, "You're clogging up the entire sidewalk!"

_She was downwind and a soft aroma of sweet Koopaberries flooded his nostrils. Something sparked in him; a dormant strong feeling, a latent flame he hadn't felt in a month burst into raging wildfire. He pointedly rose to his feet in slow, measured movements to glare down at the girl. A flicker of suspicion brightened her eyes as he spoke, _"Yeah? And who the hell's gonna make me move? _You_?"

_Most people would have cowered away but she squared up her shoulders and glared back. She even stood on her tiptoes to appear taller_, "Don't be a jerk! Maybe I _will_ make you move."

"Keep on talking and I'll kidnap you, Missy."

_He was dead serious about that too._

"Just _move_!" _She stamped her foot to emphasize her building vexation._

"I move when the hell I want, Toots."

_Then he reached forward and playfully flicked her cheek. Her skin was petal-soft, just like he thought; it was a bonus it pissed her off. She gasped before her wild temper won over; she bared her teeth and clenched her fists._

_She growled_, "Toots?! I'll _give_ you Toots!"

_The tiny human girl actually tried to swing on him, until the Green plumber idiot held her back—trying to cop a cheap feel. Bowser laughed hard and true for the first time in months. He was absolutely delighted by the girl's spunk; she actually tried to punch him! _Him!

_And he didn't miss how she threw a decent punch, not a wimpy, sissy strike but she threw like a guy; Red impressed him. Red's loud cursing and struggling attracted a surge of attention and being the nosy idiot he was, Mario was there in no time._

"Daisy! Calm-a down!"

"Just ignore-a him!" _Green loser pleaded._

"I will do it!" _She screeched, struggling manically_, "I'ma shove a pipe straight up his—!"

_Bowser was thrilled, the last person who tried to smash a fist in his face was the legendary plumbing blowhard and here this tiny, pretty human had the gall to do what men twice her size didn't have the balls to try._

_Bowser continued to relish her hot anger, blithely drinking in the way she bared her teeth and tried to kick him in the shin._

"Daisy calm-a down!" _The green plumber whispered in her ear in a fashion that seemed __**too**__ intimate. Bowser's head snapped in ten-hut as a blaring realization struck_; _he likes her. Huh. Green loserface likes her. Well tough piranha balls, she's my girl now._

_Green loserface held her back and his hands brushed a little too close to her boobies. It made Bowser want to punch his face in. It was in that moment, that limited interaction where Bowser decided she belonged to him now. His new flame, the passionate girl with the crazy hair and the blazing blue eyes._

"Daisy is it?" _He grinned, eyeing her one last time. His gaze started at her dainty feet, trailed up her legs and torso and finished at her scowling face_, "I'll be seeing you around, _Sweet cheeks_."

"Sweet cheeks?!" _She howled,_ "Come back and say that to my face you big idiot!"

_And with that he turned and left, cocky swagger back in his gait. He was in such good spirits that he was back to his old ways: generously shoving Toads out of his path and he even punted an annoying yipping rat-looking dog over a fence. He had a new interest, the fiery, lively little creature named after a flower oddly enough. He would definitely see her beautiful face again. He'd done enough moping and he had a match against some chump named Wario who he was going to beat the hell out of and give a facial._

_And he did. Bowser had reeled back with a savage roar and bludgeoned Wario so hard in the face that half of the crowd 'ooohed' and the other half burst into peels of laughter. King Bowser was back baby. That seemingly unpropitious meeting was the bursting spark that started the long, winding road to their humorous, ungainly friendship and the budding romance._

* * *

><p>Today was the day when the glorious, <em>sinfully handsome<em> Studmuffin of the Darklandians would give the friggin' _Friend Zone_ a taste of the double middle finger sandwich. _Enough was enough_! He was _too damn_ sexy and _too damn_ studly to become that dreadful **_platonic guy friend_**_._

_Eww sauce._

Bowser stared at his reflection in the mirror, face stern; _Bowser you sexy bastard, it's time to show Flower your kingdom. Today you're gonna woo her like she's never been wooed! You're gonna romance her! You're gonna sweep her off her feet!_

Then, suddenly a mental congregation of fanboys and fangirls appeared, "Yaaaaaay! Go King Bowser!"

"Ryu _suuuuuucks_!" Another mental fan booed with glee.

_She's gonna swoon!_

"Yeah!"

_And I'm gonna kiss her! Yeah! It's gonna be a big ole fat, wet kiss! A real, lady-slaying kiss! I'm going to dip her backwards suavely, gently whisper sensuous, sweet nothings in her ear until she glows pink, hold her stare and then put. It. On. Her. Like a boss._

The male mental cheerleaders high-fived and chest-bumped each other as the girls swooned and melted over his romantic zeal. _Now get out there and get your Desert babe you big, onerous, lady-killing, chiseled bastard. _His mental cheerleaders hopped around, waving pompoms, "Bowser! Bowser! He's our Koopa! If he can't do it..."

_Kill everyone who can!_

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"

Pumped up by his mental dialogue, Bowser roared and smashed his head against the mirror in a fierce bravado of hyper alpha-male energy. Only to have...

"Argh! _Shit_ that hurt!"

He groaned, rubbing his smarting forehead tenderly; the head-smash _seemed_ like a good idea at the time... There was a loud wrap of knuckles against the door in an annoying cadence, "King B, you okay in there? You're scaring the others with all that yelling. I _told_ you to lay off the teriyaki, man..."

"Uh...Yeah, I'm fine," he grunted, "Go the hell away please."

_Note to self, _never_ do that again. A face as utterly masculine and impossibly beautiful as mine should be treated like the finest porcelain, diamonds even. I mean, check out that friggin' jawline. Looks like it was carved out of rock. I feel kinda sorry for those six ugly losers...I guess Greenstache isn't _too_ busted, and neither is that Dog-boy. But Ryu? Pffffft. The ugly stick just wailed on that mysterious bastard like it had a vendetta..._

Bowser had his face inches away from the broken mirror, narcissistically tracing his thumb along his 'chiseled' jaw line. Dog-boy spoke again, "We're going to start taxing soon, return to your seat, okay?" And with the announcement given, the footfalls faded away.

Satisfied, Bowser moved away and smirked; _we're almost home. Back in my kingdom. I'm gonna impress Flower. I'm gonna have her fall madly in love and she's going to give me a kiss twice as awesome as that damn Shinobi™. UNGH!_

With one last assuring nod to himself, he returned to his seat. As he strolled past Flower, he quirked a mischievous smile as his tail playfully flicked against her leg. Her bored stare brightened with attention, before she hurriedly peered around the cabin. When Bowser took his seat, he rested his arms behind his head and smirked. From his peripherals he could see her peering at him.

_I'm gonna win you Flower, just you wait and see my little Desert Hottie._

* * *

><p>I recognized the bold burn of the Darklandian skyline, ensconced with its signature wine-red sunrise and dotted with tufts of burnt charcoal-black cumulus clouds. The Darklandian topography was a mixture of jagged mountains and smooth hilly plains that looked like a slick of spilt oil.<p>

The suitors whispered amongst each other, pointing out famous landmarks like the crown-adorned Statue of Tyranny, The Empirical State building, the Golden Gate Claw bridge and the glowing Koopawood sign in the hills. Of course the infamous Bowser's Keep trumped them all in grandeur and legend. The emerging Bowser's Keep on the scorching red horizon made the chatters vanish and faces were glued to the windows instantaneously.

"So that's the fabled Bowser's Keep, huh?" Zero mused, "The largest estate ever built, employing over five thousand workers. It's composition includes fifty bedrooms, twenty-five bathrooms, ten gourmet restaurants, eight personal gyms, three malls, five chain chomp kennels, a forty acre sporting stadium, three spas and two movie theaters."

Wolfe and Silver gaped inelegantly as Taurus blinked with obvious skepticism, "You _must_ be embellishing a bit Zero."

"You forgot the five saunas," the sheer arrogance in Bowser's smile was completely unhidden.

"Cool!" Wolfe yipped happily, "This is the place where _the _Super Mario fought! You think I can keep a souvenir? Like a rock or something!?"

Taurus stared at Wolfe blankly, "He listed off saunas, restaurants and movie theaters and yet you want...a _rock_?"

Wolfe kicked back, resting his arms behind his head and hefted thick leather boots on the tray top as he cut a sly look at Taurus, "Yeah 'cause I _reaaaally _wanna go in a sauna with _you_ and your tacky-ass cologne."

Taurus half-laughed, "Since you hail from a crude, ignorant backwater civilization, I'm surprised you recognized the smell of an expensive, exclusive fragrance."

"Hmm, didn't understand any of that too well. I don't speak the language of Stick-up-my-ass. Care to translate?" Wolfe smiled smugly.

Taurus's silver irises flicked dangerously like a branch of lightening. And just before he could make a go at Wolfe—who immediately sprang up, grinning way too wickedly and eagerly for the fight—I stepped in the middle of them, "Will you two settle down!? _Geesh!_ It's like you _always_ have to fight!"

"That _stupid_ Neanderthal started it..." Taurus growled.

"Princess, his cologne stinks—am I right or what?" Wolfe smirked. Puppo snickered.

I pointed at Taurus, "Don't let him antagonize you. I thought you were supposed to be better than him."

Taurus snorted indignantly and crossed his arms. Wolfe laughed at the retribution and I rounded on him quickly; my index finger was so close to his nose, his eyes crossed, "And _you. _I expected better from you Wolfesbane."

He deflated like a balloon, cheeks glowing pink with shame; even Puppo's ears dropped as he whimpered, "S-Sorry Daisy..."

"Just don't let it happen again," I sighed; Wolfe was pulling some _major _puppy eyes on me and it was working way too well. In my peripheral I thought I saw Bowser mimic cracking a whip. And I'm about to go over there and _mimic_ ripping him a new one.

"Ooh!" Silver pointed, "T-There's the m-moat of Lava!"

Unlike the others, Luigi didn't appear all that excited; could you blame the poor guy? He probably knew the castle inside and out after all his princess-rescuing.

"_Yay..._" Luigi deadpanned with dry sarcasm, "This-a _soooooo _neat..."

"Greenstache," Bowser suddenly crushed him into another painful half-hug, "Now that you're my _skrat _you will enjoy your stay at my palace! You know the saying 'My mansion is your mansion' or... something like that."

I peered at Grammy who was happily taking in the foreign soil, "Grammy, what are you thinking?"

"It's great to be back after so many years," she smiled, the corners of her eyes ceased blithely.

It wasn't long before we touched down and the familiar balmy air and arid scorch of sun blazed against our skin like fire. The pilots were frightened and jittery, opting to stay in the aircraft as we filed out. It was an unspoken fear, an unwritten rule amongst humans that entering the Darklandian borderline was as ominous and as superstitious as breaking a mirror.

"B-Be back soon Princess, Empress!" The co-pilot stammered nervously.

A heady mixture of nerves and excitement smoldered the jet's cabin as the suitors disembarked. Wolfe couldn't get out of the aircraft fast enough as the others calmly debarked; Stars he even jumped down, omitting the steps.

"So this is the Darklands..." Taurus spoke speculatively as he peered around, resting his hands in the pocket of his expensive suit.

"I'm s-sweating already," Silver disdained, "It's barely sunrise. Oh Stars I h-hope I don't faint..."

"This feels like home," Wolfe mused, "A little cooler but it's eighty degrees before sunrise."

Ryu opted to remain silent as Zero studied the land, "So this is the wealthiest kingdom in existence huh? I hope to be awed."

"I-I hope I don't pass out," Silver wiped sweat from his forehead.

"_Ah home_," Bowser growled with a satisfied, shark-like grin, "The best kingdom _period_. Look around losers and see how much more _badass_ my kingdom is!"

Luigi tried to sneak off the plane and pass Bowser unnoticed. He was nearly there but Bowser wrapped an arm around his shoulder and squeezed him so tight, his spine cracked loudly. Luigi's horror only went unnoticed by Bowser, who oddly seemed to like him?

Wait a minute, what was this! Was...Bowser being chummy with Luigi!? I'm going to need the record-scratch sound effect on _repeat. _Did I_ miss_ something!? Last time I checked Bowser abhorred the Mario brothers and yet here he was half-squeezing him to death in a hug.

Weird...

"This is now your second home my _skrat_; my children are now your niece and nephews," Bowser squeezed him tighter as more vertebrae popped in the plumber's spine and Luigi let out a strangled cry, "And they will call you Uncle Greenstache."

"L-Let me go..._Please?_" He wheezed.

"Let you go so I can..._squeeze harder_?" Bowser questioned with awe; wow, I certainly didn't get that? Did Bowser only hear what he wanted to hear?

Luigi panicked, shaking his head frantically, "_N-N-No_! I didn't say that at-a all! I said—!"

"_Very well then_!" Bowser boomed happily, "I admire your _flaming _spirit of _brohamhood_! Now pull it in _my _mustached _brother_."

And somehow Bowser took that as his cue to squeeze harder, smothering Luigi whose screams where muffled against Bowser's plastron. Wolfe laughed at Lulu's misfortune. There was a loud, booming chorus, "_Welcome back King Bowser!_"

Standing in the courtyard were a line of stationed Koopa sentinels who stood erect with a salute tattooed to their foreheads. Grammy smiled dreamily, taking in the palace's scenery, "It's been decades since I've last been here and the palace looks nearly identical..."

"Lord Bowser, we are most jubilant of your return."

Standing in the keep's personal airstrip were Bowser's two advisers and the Koopalings. As Kamek and Kammy bowed in tandem, the Koopalings destroyed all decorum as they charged him in one loud blob of clamor and excitement. They skipped, hopped, and even kartwheeled over to their father.

"King Daaaaaaaaaaaaaad!"

Save Ludwig and Roy, the Kooaplings clung to him like swamp leeches, "King Daddy! Like, welcome back!"

Junior beamed as his tail wagged happy, "King Dad! _King Dad_! You're baaaack! Can we play hide-and-go blow-stuff up?!"

"King Daddio!" Lemmy cried, "Look! I can roll my eyes in the back of my head like a zombie! They got stuck there once and...heh, I thought I was blind..._Wanna see me do it again!_?"

Iggy smiled, gently hugging his father, "K-King Dad we missed you...T-The twins have been c-crazy and s-sometimes they _watch_ _me when I sleep_..."

As Bowser wriggled, cursed and struggled under the constricting binds of his loving children, there was a thunderous tromp that made the plants and pebbles jump in the courtyard like bacon in a hot griddle of grease. The armored guards clinked and wobbled as Kammy and Kamek peered around unsurely.

There was a loud wail, "Kiiiiiing _Daaaaaaaaaad_!"

"Oh _Stars..._" Bowser muttered with a deep sigh, eyes peering to the heavens in a plead.

Morton wailed loudly, barreling blindly towards his father. Silver and Zero barely avoided being trampled as Morty tore through the courtyard, leapt, and latched onto his dad with a massive hug. Bowser grunted, nearly toppling over as he swayed precariously.

While blubbering with great zeal, Morton squeezed Bowser and the other Koopalings in a painful hug. He even lifted his father and siblings off the ground in his excitement.

"_King Daaaaaaaad_!" Morton blubbered, tears flying, "_I-I missed you terribly_! I am quite pleased you have returned!"

"Mor—_Glck! _Let your old man go," Bowser's voice sounded terribly strained.

Weeping openly, Morton dropped his father and siblings indecorously; the Koopalings toppled over like dominoes as Bowser staggered unduly. Though Morton was massive in girth and mass, he was as tender-hearted as they come; he sniffled and wiped his snout with the back of his hand. As he scrubbed tears away, Morton unwittingly found my stare, "M-Mother Daisy?"

There was silence and surprisingly Ludwig of all people spoke; unlike his other young siblings, he and Roy were content to watch the others smother their father from a safe distance. The young conductor's eyebrow rose, "...Princess Daisy?"

I waved affably, "Hey Luddy! Hey Morty!"

Just the smallest traces of a smile quirked on the young conductor's lips, "...Hello."

"_Ma-Mamacita_!?" Lemmy cried with incredulous mirth.

"Mama!" Junior yipped happily.

"Mama Daisy's in the _hizzoooooouse_!" Larry crowed.

The Koopalings mobbed around in a polychrome blurb of brightly colored shells and clamoring glee. My laughter only further fueled their bone-crushing hugs as their devious smiles were wrought with sharp incisors, "Mama Daisy!"

"Foxy Mamacita!"

"Dai! _Omistars_ I adore your dress! The bodice is like amaziiing~!"

"Mama Daisy!" Junior spoke, "Have you come back for good!? To finally stay with us and marry King Dad!?"

"..._Guh_?" I spoke quite eloquently as ever; somewhere, I heard Grammy laugh.

"Are you gonna marry King Dad and live with us!?" Junior chirruped hopefully. He nuzzled his head against my stomach, "I'm so happy!"

"Erm...?"

Unsure, I peered at Bowser who's jaw hung open ungainly. Grammy laughed, "Well King Bowser? Are you going to answer the cute little Prince?"

"Uh...?" Bowser scratched at the back of his head, eyes darting around the courtyard, "W-Well...Uh...?"

"Yeah!" Lemmy piped up, "And then...Mama Daisy and King Daddio can tell Junior where _babies_ come from!"

Luigi and Wolfe coughed back laughs as Bowser's left eye twitched. He slowly turned his head and shot a scathing look at Lemmy who expertly ignored the looming death-threat.

"_You see Junior_..." Larry bent down and spoke to Junior with a 'mature older brother voice', "when a Koopa and a human woman love each other, they decide to—"

Lemmy and Larry both performed unsightly pelvic thrusts that made me burst into a tide of laughter. Grammy covered her mouth, chuckling softly as Bowser's left eye twitched.

"They're gonna do summa THIS!"

"And summa THAT!"

"And SUMMA THIS!"

"_That's enough outta you two!_" Bowser grunted, grabbing the cusp of the twins' shells and hauling them into the air, "Let the Princess breathe you shelled ingrates."

The Koopalings backed away to provide some elbow room, though Junior made sure to stick close to my hip. I laughed when he took the initiative to hold my hand. Kammy and Kamek approached, bowing smoothly, "Salutations Lord Koopa."

Ooh they were formal; not even 'King Bowser.' Then they bowed to Grammy and I, "Princess and Empress Sarasaland we welcome you both to your kingdom."

Kamek froze in the middle of his bow, "E-Empress Meringue?"

Grammy blinked, "Kamek? _Kamek Koopa_? Is that really you!?"

"_Merri!_" Kamek quailed happily, losing all sense of decorum and formality; Kammy stared at him askance, "How have you been Empress Sarasaland?! Stars! It's been years! _Decades_ even!"

They surprised everyone by hugging each other. Bowser's jaw dropped as I blinked; they knew each other? Well I guess if she was a friend to King Serous, then she would be familiar with Kamek...

"I've been well old friend!" she smiled, "I remember when you still had a...what do kids call it? Ah yes! A soulpatch."

Bowser glared incredulously at his male advisor, "_You_ had a soulpatch?!"

Kamek smiled, "Hate to break it to you Master Bowser, but I was _quite _the Koopette killer back in my day..."

"And how many _eons_ ago was _that?_" Kammy puffed with hauteur, "During the S_tone Age?_"

"I don't mean to be rude..." Zero intercepted, "but...what _is_ the meaning of this?"

Grammy smiled, "Lord Salini, in my youth I used to be friends with the late King Serous. I used to visit the Darklands as an esteemed guest and had plenty of adventures. Kamek served as King Serous's advisor and we had been friends since then! Of course this was long before King Bowser was born."

"Intriguing..." Ryu muttered pensively.

Bowser rubbed his chin in thought, "...Huh. Never thought Queen Meringue knew Kamek..."

"It's a small world I suppose," Kammy sighed with a wan smile, "Then I suppose an introduction to our great kingdom is unneeded as both Sarasalandian Ladies are well acquainted."

"Well I haven't been here before!" Wolfe beamed, "Impress me!"

"King Bowser isn't trying to marry _you,_" Zero laughed.

"My kingdom will awe anyone," Bowser smirked, "And I can think of several places I can take the empress and princess..."

"Very well then your Awfulness," Kammy bowed, "As the Sarasalandian ladies are familiar with Lord Bowser, than I shall introduce His Manliness's sires."

"_'His Manliness'_!?" Wolfe laughed.

"I remember the Koopalings," Zero spoke with a surprisingly light tone, "They destroyed Emperor Pierre Lightheart's statue with marvelous gusto."

"_Right. _Ludwig was in rare form that day!" Larry laughed, "It's usually the 'terrible twins' who blow things up! But Luddy? Naw, he wrecked the hell out of that statue!"

Though Ludwig's face remained stolid, his slate-blue eyes tightened, "...Keep talking and I'll enlighten everyone about the gallon of milk you drank that was, in fact _not _milk."

Larry fell silent at the drop of a hat, gulping thickly. Kammy cleared her throat, "_Ahem!_ Now then, in descending age order I shall present the crown princes and princess of the Darklands. The eldest is Prince Ludwig the composer."

The attention turned onto the eldest Koopaling. As cool and recondite as ever, Ludwig bowed smoothly, wild blue mane bobbing with his slight movement, "Welcome Empress, Princess Sarasaland. I hope your stay is pleasant. Princess Sarasaland, may I say you look terrifically _divine_."

"Oh! Thanks!" I half-laughed.

Ludwig bowed deeply to Grammy but surprised me when he pressed a kiss to my gloved hand. The courteous act began to draw stares as he lingered a little _too_ long. Bowser's eyes narrowed in suspicion as Kammy did a double-take.

Zero blinked, "Ludwig? As in Ludwig Von Koopa? The composer of the 'Starred Nights', 'The Ballad of Blithe' and 'The Dance of Cherries, Whipped Cream and Sprinkles'?"

"I am he," he replied simply.

Taurus looked impressed, "Von Koopa? Why, your music is a thing of great beauty. I've seen each of your winter masterpieces performed live and my breath was stolen each time."

Lugwid nodded, "I'm glad you enjoyed."

Kammy bobbed her head, assenting, "The second eldest is Prince Roy Koopa."

"I'm da beef cake extrado'naire, tha Koopette-slayin', fast talkin' badshell-havin' sonnavagun," he grinned wickedly.

"This is Prince Morton who has a great ear for music."

Morton waved bashfully, red eyes glinting diffidently, "Greetings royal human males and tiny Empress woman, I am Morton Jr. thusly named after my grandfather. It is good to see you again Ms. Daisy."

"Oh Morty!" I rolled my eyes, shaking my head, "You know to call me 'Mama Daisy'."

At that, a couple of suitors peered at me curiously. Wolfe even 'whispered' to Ryu, "Why do they call her 'Mama?'"

"Next are the twins, Larry and Lemmy respectively. They are..._ahem _fine, respectable young shells..." Kammy's snout should have grown ten feet longer for that overt lie.

Bowser glowered, watching them closely for the slightest sign of foolishness. Surprisingly the twins bowed respectfully, Larry even stuck his hand out to Silver, "Hey there human boy, I'm Prince Larry and it's nice to meet you."

Silver smiled, "H-Hello I'm Prince Silver of t-the Moonstone Kingdom."

As he shook Larry's arm, it suddenly ripped out of its socket and squirted fake blood excessively. Silver gaped wordlessly as Larry began to scream, "Oh no! My arm! I've been _disarmed_!"

Lemmy ran over, "What a _disarming_ stranger!"

"I got to _hand_ it to ya bro."

"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" Larry said with a philosophical tone as the fake blood continued squirting away garishly.

"You're so _hand_some my twin!"

"Don't worry people! It's okay, he's un_armed_!"

I burst into peals of laughter as Wolfe, Lulu and Grammy split their sides. Bowser did _not _look amused. In fact he took the fake arm from Silver and slapped the back of the twin's heads in a single—and impressive—blow. He shook the fake arm at them in admonishment, "Try another stupid thing. I _dare_ you two."

Larry gaped with a really unflattering look and then...His eyes popped out of his head. The fake, rubber eyeballs bounced around crazily, bouncing to and fro around the airstrip court. I laughed, doubling over Wolfe screamed with laughter.

Lemmy turned to Wolfe and when he smiled, he had in a set of grotesque crooked buck-teeth, "Myfff namff is Lemmyfff."

Wolfe was partially laughing and crying as he hollered. By now even the serious armed Koopa troopas tried to hide their smirks.

"I'm _going_ to _kill_ them," Bowser growled through gritted teeth, "I swear I'm going to _end _them. I brought them into this world and I'm willing to take them out for _free_."

Kammy harrumphed, shooting a severe glance to the chuckling soldiers, "The Lord's only daughter, Princess Wendy O Koopa, fashionista extradonaire."

"_Borzorgno_ gentlemen," Wendy fanned herself with a lace fan, and dramatically snapped it open with flare. She closed her eyes and struck a pose. Bowser groaned and buried his face into his palm, "I am the ever glamorous and ever beautiful princess Wendy! I am the goddess of grace, countess of culture! The princess of pretty and the duchess of delight! With a swing of my hi—"

Bowser rolled his eyes and turned to Kammy. He made a 'let's hurry the hell up' signal and immediately Kammy cut Wendy off, "Next is Prince Iggy, the culinary genius."

All eyes turned on Iggy who blushed rose-red as he stammered a soft, "H-Hello. Uh...I...Uh...Hi...I'm Iggy...Yep...Hi...again."

"And last but not least," Kammy finished with a flourish, "The youngest and crown prince, Lord Bowser Junior."

Junior shoved his way past his siblings and strutted to the front boldly. He stood, chest puffed, arms stamped on his hips as he glared 'intimidating-ly' at us all. Grammy cooed at his darling visage, "Why he's such a cute little thing!"

"Aww," Wolfe grinned, "He's a mini Bowser!"

"Silence peasants!" Junior commanded, brandishing a tiny fist, "Be still! For Prince Bowser Junior is speaking! I...oh...uh? Where was I..? Oh yes..._Ahem! _I am the Crown prince of the amazing, totally hip Darklands! I am a Koopa! A warrior! An artist! And I am Toadette's future husband."

That last reference went over everyone's heads, save Luigi who was one of the few people present that knew who Toadette was. The green plumber arched an eyebrow, "Future husband-a?"

"I was taught a man always needs two things," Bowser Junior continued in the same super-hero voice, "shaving gel and a sturdy jockstrap!"

I burst out laughing along with Silver, Lulu and Wolfe. Ryu didn't try to hide his smile as Bowser groaned, burying his face into his hands for the second time, "Somebody _kill me_."

"Quite the family you have," the slightest grin curled onto Zero's lips.

"And we have one more guest who has been...Shall I say, observing things," Kamek hummed, "He is a monarch from his ever own kingdom and is like family to Lord Bowser."

"_He glows like the moon and fades like the darkest shadows_," A disembodied voice narrated from all around, "_he is the foulest fiend_._ He is me! The ghoulish, regal, sophisticated King Ichabod!_"

Materializing from thin air was none other than King Boo. He was smiling wickedly, sharp fangs bared in an awful smile and red eyes misty with mischief, "_Salutations fleshlings_."

Bowser grinned as half of the suitors freaked out, "Icky! Why didn't you tell me you were stopping by!? We could have gotten into some trouble tonight!"

"_I wanted to surprise you my friend, and I shall say I have accomplished my goal_." The boo glowed pleasantly, clapping his hands together with glee, "_Yes haha_!"

"I-I-It's a g-g-_ghost_...!" Silver squeaked, his naturally pale complexion leeched of color until he was nearly as white as a sheet.

Luigi looked like he was going to faint.

"A spirit..." Ryu whispered, eyes narrowed. Swifter than the blink of an eye, his hand fingered a holster on his back, "...Hmm, it doesn't _seem_ malignant..."

"_O fairest Princess Sarasaland_," the boo disappeared and suddenly materialized in front of me, "_It is always a pleasure to see your comely face; as a flower thirsts for sun so do I long to see your beauteous visage._"

"Uh..." I leaned away from the overly amorous boo, "H-Hi King Boo..."

"_You may call me Ichabod my dearest,_" the Boo purred with a voice dripping of amor. He pressed a kiss onto the back of my hand and it felt like ice seeped through the silk of my glove and pricked my skin unpleasantly; I shivered.

"_Give you the chills do I_?" The Boo spoke in a seductive voice, red eyes no longer glowing, but smoldering like dying coals, "_My little pretty chrysanthemum, I can treat you to suc—_"

Bowser cleared his throat with a pointed curtness, tapping his foot in an impatient cadence. King Boo took some kind of cue and with a wink, he disappeared and materialized beside Bowser who shot a rueful glare at the smirking boo.

"_What_?" The Boo sounded too innocent, "_I was simply admiring the...flowers_."

"Well then _don't_," Bowser huffed, "Go to some _other_ flowers."

"King Ichabod," Grammy smiled at him, "Weren't you once competing for my Granddaughter's heart?"

"_True...But alas_," the boo sighed dramatically covering his face with his arm and closing his eyes, "_I know another who loves her far deeper than I..._"

Then he opened an eye and peered at Bowser with a wicked smile. That made the other suitors peer at him too. I was confused, why were they all looking at Bowwy like that for? And why was Bowwy turning so red?

...Weird...

"_Which reminds me, I hope you do not mind that I have brought my bootiful little ghoul with me. She is currently spending currency in one of your malls of shopping_."

"Bow? Not at all."

Luigi slowly slipped behind the other suitors, stealthily hiding behind the taller forms of Wolfe and Ryu. Noticing the odd behavior, Ryu peered at Luigi curiously before facing forward. It was obvious why Luigi was trying to hide; King Boo and Luigi had a history similar to that of Mario and Bowser. Kammy nodded and spoke again in her official tone, "We shall take one of the royal airships for the tour."

Wolfe's golden eyes smoldered like the sky at sunrise, "A ship where Mario and King B fought!? _Epic._"

"Nonsense, we don't _reuse_ vehicles here," Kammy laughed incredibly, "The king only rides in an airship _once._"

"_Reuse the same vehicles!?_" Kamek crowed, "What do you think we are? _Poor_?!"

Bowser, Kammy, Kamek and the Darklandian soldiers laughed as if it were a really funny joke. I was stunned; they didn't reuse their vehicles!? They were that wealthy that they could afford to build new ships and scrap semi-new ships!?

"What's next!?" Bowser roared with glee, "Re-wearing the _same shell_!?"

Bowser slapped his knee with louder laughter as the Darklandians crowed with glee. The suitors seemed stunned as Wolfe blinked, "Wow...I guess King B's really loaded..."

"A-And he thinks we're all poor," Silver blinked.

"..." Taurus frowned wordlessly.

After wiping a tear from her eyes, Kammy turned to the nearest solider, "See to the Airship _Hellfire _up and running, will you?"

"Yes Lady Kammy!" And with a salute, the solider dashed off.

* * *

><p>"This ship i-is huge!" The Albino whispered with awe.<p>

The _Hellfire_ was quite impressive, spanning a monstrous three stories in height, it was daunting to think something so bulky and sturdy could take to the air. The mammoth airship creaked and groaned with great burden as the congregation sailed through the thick intertwining ribbons of resplendent orange and red sunlight. Flower stood beside Grammy and Greenstache, admiring the formless ooze of landscape below.

Her dark blue eyes held a dreamy, dewy glimmer that Bowser could hopelessly drown in for an eternity. Then she blinked, feeling his stare and locked eyes. Flower smiled at him beautifully. Sunrise rouged her dusky skin and ruby hair afire with sparkling tapers of magentas and reds.

The Koopa King felt his knees buckle and any determination and strength cave with the weight of her stare. His face burned ruby-red and he instantly turned away, missing her surprise.

_S-She looked at me...She LOOKED at ME. Stars she's so damn pretty...A-And my heart is all fluttery and I feel light-headed...like that one time I accidently snorted kerokero cola up my nose...Is she still looking at me? Maybe I can steal a peek at her—SHIT! S-SHE'S STILL LOOKING! Why does one glance from her make me act like a chump sandwich!? Like a chump sandwich with a side of FRIES!? Argh! Damn it!_

"_You are completely bumbling_," Ichabod laughed, suddenly materializing by Bowser's side, "_Though I am amused by your blundering, I shall be a true friend and help thee._"

The ghost king floated over to Kammy Koopa, "_My charming Koopette, would it be possible to educate our guests about the Darklands' five burrows? The king would be most gracious._"

Hag blinked before smiling, "Why certainly Lord Ichabod! I have _quite_ a lengthy lecture prepared for the occasion!"

"We're in for _anooooother_ lecture!" Lemmy crowed.

"Dis gonna be drier than a dry bones ass cheek," Roy groaned under his breath.

Dog-boy heard 'lecture' and 'lengthy' in the same sentence and he wanted _none of that_. But trust he did his damnedest to break the hell out of there, "Well...it's _obviously _that _special _time in the morning for me to...take my...stuff...I need to take...to uh...stay alive...yeah, I'll just be _going now_. I'll quietly step aside not to bother anyone and—"

But when he turned to leave, the sexy Desert babe and surprisingly, the creepy Sarasalandian guy of all people stopped him from leaving, "If _I _have to stay for this lecture then so do _you._"

"Awwww come _ooooooon_!" Dog-boy wailed with dismay as the Albino laughed.

Within no time flat Hag had gathered the suitors and began her lecture, "The Darklands are composed of five individual burrows: Fire, Ash, Cinder, Steel and Smoke. Fire is known for its opulence and business management, Ash for its historical preservation and historical artifacts, Cinder for its thriving tourism and Steel for its industrial prowess."

King Boo grabbed Bowser by the cusp of his shell and dragged him out of sight. The Sarasalandian Creep and that damn Shinobi™ peered at them with dubious interest, just catching the tail end of their strange behavior. Once they were out of eyesight, Bowser began to pace.

Ichabod smirked, "_I shalt take a wild guess and presume thou art nervous, my scaled friend_?"

"Me? Nervous?! _Ha_! When do I get nervous?" Bowser huffed, "I'm never nervous!"

"_I shalt take that as a yes,_" the Boo grinned slyly.

"I am an irresistible hunk!" Bowser barked, "I mean look at all of this sex I _drip_! Muscles, masculinity...A scarily handsome face and a panty-dropping voice. Women don't stand a chance! What woman could resist _alla_ this sexiness?!"

King Boo smirked ruthlessly, "_Princess Daisy that's who. She is shutting you down badly my friend. Oh sooooo badly._"

Bowser growled, clenched fists trembling, "I'm busting out of the friend zone! I don't care who I have to step on! But I'm getting the hell out! And into the let's date zone!"

"_Then leave that abominable ego at the door. If you want to win thy fair damsel, show a vulnerable side of thyself, and you must show these irritating things maidens call 'emotions.'_"

"Emotions?!" Repulsed, Bowser drew away, "_Ugh!_ Why the hell would I do that?!"

The boo rolled his eyes tiredly, "_For some ill-conceived reason, women enjoy seeing men in quivering, pathetic fleshy masses of sentimentality. Quite frankly I'd rather see a man who could rule with a brutal bloodthirsty alacrity! What speaks of passion more than a man inspiring to plunder a kingdom?! Everyone knows dictators pull the bootiful ghouls. Anyway, be honest and vulnerable and all that...utter malarkey women like._"

"But vulnerability is for _sissies_!" Bowser threw his hand up, "What does an eight foot Koopa King look like crying and pouring his heart out?!"

"_Dost thou want to be out of the purgatory of the 'Zone that is friendly'? Henceforth dost as I have said._"

Bowser swallowed thickly, "_Ugh_ Stars, this better work..."

Then Bowser paused, "Did you ever get those mints I wanted? And that stuff human males spray on themselves?"

"_The tacs that tic? And the cologne? Why, yes I had my underling boos ste—ahem_ 'acquire'_ the goods..._"

He clearly meant he had stolen that crap.

Bowser grabbed the cologne and generously doused himself, slapping his neck in a crazed frenzy before taking several handfuls of tiny mints and shoving handful after handful into his mouth until his jowls bulged with thousands of tiny mints. He crunched them laboriously, swallowing in one large gulp and nearly choked until his eyes teared-up.

King Boo blinked incredulously, watching his friend have a violent coughing fit. Once it passed, Bowser peered at him, "...How's the breath?"

"_...You nearly choked to death and yet you are worried about—hmm. Actually, you smell like an entire field of mint leaves. You are quite minty, my friend._"

"Good..." Bowser grumbled, "I'd do anything if it would make Flower want to...k-kiss me..."

"_Ah as the saying goes, _"_'If thou want to impress her, use a breath fresher'. 'If thou wantith some tongue, shove a mint down thy lung.' 'He who smells crass shall never obtain ass.' 'If thou smelt it then thou hath dealt it'. If thou denies it then thou hath supplied—_"

"OKAY!" Bowser roared, "I get it. _Geesh_!" Then he muttered, "Stars, I _soooooo_ need new friends..."

But evil friends were _so_ hard to find, look at the dunces he had to choose from: Petey Piranha was a smelly diaper-wearing loser, Cackletta? Eh pass. The X-Nauts? _Losers in terrible cosplay outfits_. And worst of all, that damn mechanical peeping pervert camera that had the hots for Peach, TEC! See!? Bad company _sooo _was hard to find.

Sigh.

King Boo was a _wee_ bit crazy and was mentally stuck in the fifteenth century but that was something he could overlook; the ghost was always down to _screw_ over Mario. Not to mention Ichabod threw the best parties...

"_—Art tho listening to a word I said, scaled rogue?_"

"Huh? Yeah? Oh yeah...Be kind and mannerly blah, blah, show chivalry, blah, blah, crap."

"_You did not hear a damn thing did you, King Scallywag?! Fine, away with you. But do not mess this up!_"

Bowser sighed, rubbing the back of his head, "So...vulnerability huh? Ugh. _Uck. Fine_. I can do that if..."

_If it means she'll kiss me with those soft pink lips..._

With a sigh, the terrible twosome returned to the main deck where Hag was still lecturing and pointing out Darklandian landmarks. Dog—boy, who was cushioned in between Flower and that damn Shinobi™—so he wouldn't run off—looked like he wanted to blow his brains out. He noticed Bowser's return and with a mocking bow, moved to the side.

The Koopalings had veered off, playing an installed arcade game as Ludwig stood beside Flower, pointing out noteworthy buildings. Flower whispered something to him that brought forth a giggle from her and a soft chuckle from the composer.

"What's o-on the agenda King Bowser?" That skinny, scrawny albino kid with the huge eyes asked.

"In my culture," Bowser grinned, "My ancestors used to battle for the throne in gladiatorial pits that were described as hell on earth; blood, bones, gore painted the coliseum floors in glorious battle."

An uneasy mist of silence shrouded the suitors as they shared timorous looks amongst each other. The scrawny Albino swallowed thickly as that damn Shinobi™ loser rubbed his jaw in thought.

"It was also common in ancient Darklandian society for two males to battle to the death for the right to mate a Koopette," Bowser peered at Flower, "Especially if she was a really _pretty_ female..."

Grammy raised an eyebrow, grinning at Bowser impishly as Flower's cheeks baked with blush. Bowser smirked, absorbing every second her cheeks glowed pink; every time Flower blushed, her complexion flushed prettily and her eyes twinkled.

_Damn pretty..._

Ludwig's expression flickered so quickly—something akin to a sneer—Bowser missed it. The other suitors encroached.

"So today gentlemen," Bowser grinned at them wickedly, and relished the weight of Flower's stare on him. And since Flower _was _watching him, he struck a heroic pose, gallantly puffing his chest out, resting his hands on his hips and flexing _the hell_ out of his biceps, "I have a few tests to run you _suitors_ through and we're going to duke it out and see who's worthy of winning the fair princess's hand. It'll be low key and just between us. That way you don't get embarrassed when I kick your asses."

Grammy cooed happily, clapping her hands together, "This will be absolutely thrilling!"

"A battle royal!? Against all of you guys!?" Dog-Boy chirruped, bouncing on his toes and throwing jabs, "This sounds _awesooooome_~!"

"I will do my best," that damn Shinobi™ _oh so coolly _replied without a single inflection in his voice. Bowser growled deep in the back of his throat with thick layers of contempt; the king even turned his head away with boiling disgust, choosing to glare at Ryu from the coroner of his eyes. Stars, was he_ sick_ of that mysterious bastard. He always thought he was _so cool _and mysterious...and _cool. _Bowser's ire only grew hotter as he noticed the way Flower stared _gushingly_ at that damn Shinobi™ leader, as if he were _good-looking_ or something! _Feh..._

* * *

><p><em>They want to fight over me like a prize? What the hell is up with that!? I want to compete in the games too! Urgh! I'm not some pathetic, helpless princess...<em>

Fuming, I peered at the horizon, catching a glimpse of a building at the skyline. The Firelands Coliseum loomed in a statuesque fortress. Its longitude reached farther than any palace, bulkier than any conglomerate and its latitude dipped into the heavens like a spire honoring deities. Its highest levels were dappled with cottony cumulus clouds.

There were so many Koopas! Dark swarms wreathed around the coliseum entrances like clots of smoke; wait, I thought he said this was going to be low key!? Bowser must have thought the same thing as he suddenly turned on King Boo.

"_Ichabod..._" Bowser growled, "I thought you arranged this to be just _us._"

King Boo looked slightly nervous, "_Perhaps I accidentally told one person...And then another...And then...uh...held a conference of presses and announced it to the Darklands?_"

Bowser growled, slapping a palm to his face, "Urgh! _You idiot_! I told you to keep this hush-hush! What the hell does 'hush-hush' mean to you!?"

"_Forgive me, friend but I could not help myself! The glorious tales of your quest for love must be spread to the four corners of the world_!" King Boo boomed dramatically.

"Damn, now I _have _to win fair-and-square. Or I look like a chump. And I _never _look like a chump," Bowser sighed a dark billow of smoke.

The airship's arrival brought forth a thunderous raise of cheer. Bowser had the golden key to everything in his kingdom and it was no surprise when we scored a pass to the front of the line. The crowd cheered at Bowser's appearance, with the most exuberant Koopas patting his shell. The Koopalings waved as Lemmy and Larry garishly blew kisses.

We stepped through the towering entrance and the flood of energy and activity in the coliseum rattled with the mottled roar of thousands of Koopas and the crowd moved in sluggish droves, crawling lethargically towards the balconies and seating.

There was a cacophony of noise and a myriad of scents, like the mouthwatering aroma of frying beef, the scent of leather and metals. The loud laughter of excited fanatics and the thunderous roar above our heads permeated the coliseum; the air was rich with excitement and festered with anticipation.

While the first floor was abuzz with activity, Bowser led us to the fifth floor which was both quieter and vacant. Iron statues wrought with violent images decorated the floor with gruesome conquests depicted. Koopas were engaged in brutal fights, biting and clawing with burning eyes and bared teeth. I avoided looking at the graphic, gory statues which actually _drew_ the attention of most of the suitors.

"Look at this one. His_ guts_ are _spilling out_!" Wolfe 'whispered' with glee.

"These look-a so real..." Luigi said thoughtfully.

"It's grotesque y-yet oddly beautiful," Silver hummed.

I picked up a noticeable trend with these sculptures; though the majority of the statues were bronzed, fewer were mounted in silver and the rarest were cast in gold. Grammy was studying a golden statue of a vicious Koopa roaring in fury. I stepped beside her and read the plaque, "1956 victor? So then these gold statues are the winners?"

"Right," Grammy chirruped, "Bronzes are created of all previous combatants, silvers were the runner-ups and the victors are honored with the ever glorious gold immortalization."

"So who is he?" I mused, "King Serous?"

"Yes, this is King Serous at his prime," Grammy gently touched the statue's shimmering torso with affection. She made a sly look, "You should look at some of the statues, closer to the northeastern entrance where we came from. I think I saw a notable gold statue there."

So I searched and found the statue Grammy spoke of. I peered up at the towering, life-sized Koopa. His image glinted with gallantry, immortalized in sparkling karats and I found myself admiring a familiar fierce glare and bulging biceps raised in the throes of victory. This Koopa looked absolutely hellish; jowls open in a silent roar, incisors bared and eyes furious slits.

"Admiring hunky heroes eh?"

Bowser appeared at my side with a grin that was insatiable and teeming with wicked satisfaction. I laughed, "And now you're a coliseum winner too!? Geesh! Is there _anything_ you haven't done yet?"

His grin curved slyly, "I've got a real blush-worthy answer for that. Anyways I was just looking for you and yet here you are admiring my sexiness. I _do _look ravishing in gold, don't I?"

I reeled with laughter, "Stars you're conceited! Alright then, what did you want Coliseum Champ?"

I saw the suitors were being ushered to a separate barrack. I was about to turn and follow them, but Bowser stopped me with a hand on my shoulder. He smirked, "They're going to a locker room to get ready for the games."

I glared, "And that reminds me...What the hell!? 'Winning my hand'!? Bowser, I am _not_ a trophy to be won! I'd rather compete myself than be some stupid little prize. I'm not a damsel in distress and I don't need anyone fighting my battles. _Argh_, what were you thinking?!"

"Maybe I just wanted to impress you...?"

I sighed angrily, "You know what? This _is _your day to lead me around your Kingdom. Fine. I'll suck it up but just know you're gonna be in the doghouse for this."

"Also there's one last small thing..."

I growled and he laughed, "I swear! It's not that bad!"

"_Way _in the doghouse," I gnarred through my teeth.

"There's a _teensy_ tradition involved, nothing too major. But it's something I'd like you to do for me."

"And it involves _what_?"

He smiled, "That you sit in this really pretty skybox and wear these special flowers behind your ears."

That didn't sound unreasonable, "Alright. Then give me the flower and have someone show me to the box."

He chuckled, "The servants will have to attend you. If I give it to you, then that'll mean something else entirely."

Curiosity pricked, I arched an eyebrow, "So what does the flower mean if you hand it to me?"

His smile softened as he touched my face. His voice grew deeper in timbre, "That I offer my undying adoration for you."

A swell of fluttering butterflies whiskered in the pit of my belly. His expression was soft as he gently glossed his thumb over the curve of my cheek. I barely noticed the subtle curve of his smile, "If I gave my undying adoration, would you accept?"

A vicious sear of heat razed my face all too obviously. Bowser's growing grin meant I had colored as bright as a carnation.

"I..."

He pulled away, eyes still gentle, "Seeya soon _Purga_."

And with a wink he turned and walked off. I was stumped, staring at Bowser's retreating shell with wide eyes and a hanging jaw. _What the hell just happened? _Argh, what was that?! What was that soft look and those lovey-dovey words for!? He confuses and flusters me so badly!

Grammy approached with a slew of maids in tow, "_Pichi_, these kind Koopettes were looking for you, ready to go?"

I peered sharply at where Bowser had been seconds earlier, "...Yeah, let's go..."

The flock of maids were slender Koopettes dressed in sheer gowns of all colors of the rainbow and they were breathtakingly beautiful. Their congregation had multiple heads turning and many interested eyes lingering. The most stunning of the Koopettes smiled and motioned us to follow.

We were led to a room that flowed into a white chamber elegantly draped with golden silk tapestries and filled with pearlescent statues of curvaceous Koopettes. It wasn't unnoticed how each Koopette statue wore the same flowing gown and a crown of flowers sat atop their heads.

The chamber's dazzling furnishings, floral aroma and towering golden-gilded vanity would have even the most wealthy queen bitter with biting envy. A white silk gown was set into my lap with the reverence of a holy grail. I held up the dress; it was fashioned in the same style the elegant Koopette statues adorned and glowed with the pearly brilliance of the moon.

The maids approached with serene smiles and glittering gowns. The most radiant of them spoke.

"The king has selected you as the honored, coveted maid of Amor," the Koopette spoke with a soft smile and a soothing, warm voice, "Each honorable lady before you has wore the gown of radiance and as the maid of Amor so shall you. It symbolizes beauty and the strike of white against the dark crowd will draw the interested eye of the male gaze."

"Okay..." I spoke unsurely; I was still pretty miffed about being made the 'damsel in distress', but blatantly disrespecting their culture would be rude.

I set aside my ego and breathed a sigh of surrender. I slipped out of my bulky, puffy dress and pulled on the gown of radiance with the maids' assistance. Gentle claws carefully worked at my back, lacing intricate straps with practiced ease. Outside the chambers I could hear soft bouts of laughter and fair conversation.

"...ou tarry near the Amor chambers too long my King!"

There was soft chuckle, "What? I'm just checking on my Maiden of Amor. Are you ladies taking the finest care?"

"You're just looking for an excuse to snoop around the Maiden Chambers you sly sneak!" The matron laughed, "You know she is receiving the utmost care."

"So I guess I can't take one little look?" He teased.

"You snoop shell! I knew you were trying to steal a peek at her! Now shoo. You have to get prepared yourself, Milord."

"Very well. I bet she'll look stunning."

"She will."

"Who do you think that was?" I asked Grammy.

She smiled, arching a playful eyebrow, "I'd wager it was that young Koopa. You know, the one who rules the kingdom, has eight beautiful Koopalings and can't keep his eyes off of you...?"

I blushed, huffing and crossing my arms, "Yeah? Well that same _Koopa_ is making me play the role of a pathetic damsel..."

The matron returned, moving as seamlessly as liquid. The others carefully unveiled two delicate, milk-white blossoms resting atop purple velvet. The pearly, milky petals shimmered with sparkles of moistened dew drops like diamond. The soft, creamy petals were likened to the sweet genteel of lilies.

"These are the rarest breed, created from the cross-pollination of Koopa lilies and Koopa roses," the Matron breathed, "It is called Amor; to symbolize purity and desire."

"It's absolutely beautiful," Grammy hummed.

My hair was brushed until it fell onto my shoulders in fiery curly tendrils. The maids delicately slipped the stunning Amors behind each of my ears.

"Last but not least is the final touch, burning red lipstick to make your suitors yearn for the touch of your succulent lips."

"Succulent?" I laughed, "_Wow_. You can make anything sound good!"

"And lastly," the Matron Koopette spoke, "with this flower you shall award your victor. It is a sign of your devotion and favor."

I twirled the flower between my pointer and thumb; unlike the two large blossoms behind my ears, this flower's petals were a bold, striking red and it felt like silk under my fingers.

"This looks like it's turning out to be a big to do after all," Grammy laughed softly.

I sighed, "I can't believe I'm doing this...Bowser owes me _big._"

With a smooth sweep of the Matron's hand, we followed. We traveled to a lavish skybox decorated in the same glamorous golden silk as the chamber. Grammy and I were seated comfortably upon sheer gold pillows. I frowned, touching the silk; though it was all beautiful, it was very over the top. I didn't like all this attention and I didn't like being prettied up as a pretty prize.

"Now this is luxury!" Grammy preened, "We have a perfect view and here we sit upon golden silk pillows like ancient queens!"

There was a loud cry from below, "Mama Daisy! Mama Daisy down here!"

Seated below were a long span of Koopalings. The twins and Junior waved animatedly as Roy ogled the beautiful Matrons. Morton and Iggy waved with a little less zeal but the same warmth was present as their exuberant siblings.

"You look great!" Wendy cheered, "Like, why couldn't I have gotten dressed up like that!?"

"_Helloooooo_!" I sang, waving at their balcony.

"Mamacita! Watch this!" Lemmy crowed.

"Are you watchin' Foxy Mama!?" Larry yelled.

The twins flapped their arms, making silly sounds with their armpits as they danced around with goofy faces. Junior reeled with laughter as Roy growled, fed up with his younger siblings antics.

"Whadda bunch o' jackass shells..." Roy shook his head.

A growing animation and liveliness rose from the balconies as an announcer stepped onto the dusty arena floor with a microphone in hand, "_Wellllllllcome to the legendary Flame Coliseum! The air is saturated with the history of legends! Of marvels! There have been triumphs and great defeats! There has been massive bloodshed in this arena's past! And now ten combatants will battle for the hand of the fair Amor! And this year's Amor is the Princess Sarasaland!_"

I was gob smacked when a stage light suddenly burned against my skin and there was a raise of cheers and a rouse of catcalls. I gaped stupidly, blushing as red as my hair as Grammy waved elegantly to the crowd. I heard the Koopalings cheer for me with meretricious zeal.

"Mama Daaaaaaaaaaaaaisy!"

"We love yoooooou~!"

"King Dad loves you mo—ugh! _Oww_!"

"Like, shut up dumbshell!"

"_And now we shall present the contestants! Ten brave competitors come to compete in three trials! THREE! And the victor awarded the most points will win an entire day alone with the Amor! The first is Prince Silver!_"

Looking anything but fierce, Silver's wiry form stepped through the looming archway in white leather armor, face deep red as he nervously twiddled his thumbs. I laughed at how shy and demure he appeared; he was so cute.

"_Our next contestant is Wolfe!_"

He stepped out, bouncing on his toes and shuffling as agile as a boxer. His glinting golden armor glowed under the sun as he leaned back and joined in the howl. He took his place beside Silver, standing confidently, arms akimbo and he even waved at me.

"_Next is Prince Taaaaurus!_"

Taurus stepped out grinning smugly, nodding every now and then at the crowd's fervor. His blue armor was suiting for a prince of a sea kingdom. He stepped beside Wolfe who was going above and beyond in ignoring him.

"_Give a large hand for Senaaaator 'Absolute' Zeroooooo._"

Zero walked in. Decked in orange armor, he quietly took his place beside Taurus who was watching the roiling crowd with acute fascination. Silver twiddled his thumbs as Wolfe continued to wave exuberantly.

"_Next is the bestowed honored Skrat. He is Greenstache!_"

The Koopa crowd donned fake mustaches and I burst into laughter. Lulu walked out wearing emerald-green armor and did the robot dance. The crowd's cheer grew loud as he smoothly glided into his spot beside Zero.

"_Next is the Dragon of the Hidden Village, Ryu!_"

Ryu appeared in a cloud of red smoke, outfitted in bold red armor. He didn't wave or cheer as he stepped into the fray, he simply walked to his place and crossed his arms; he wasn't here for games. Though he did look my way and nod. I smiled and waved back. Is there anything he doesn't look good in?

"_Our next contestant is the five-time champion of Glitzville! The Golden Gladiator!_"

I froze. Oh Stars pleeease don't tell me it's...

Grammy hummed thoughtfully, "You don't think it's...?"

"Stars _please_ don't be him..." I supplanted, "Please, _pleaaaase_ don't let it be..."

"_He's the champ! Raaaawk Haaawk!"_

I nearly screamed; walking down in brown armor was none other than my ex-idol. He swaggered confidently, flexing his muscles and raising cheer. He peered at me with a wicked grin and winked. _Oh Stars take me now._

"_Next is the baron of bad! The king of cad! The stud of strength! Make waaaay for Midbuuuuus!_"

Eh? What was that? A creature best described as a huge, flabby magenta warthog stomped out, snorting and grunting. He threw his arms up in cheer and roared loudly. I turned away; _Eww_. He peered at me and peeled his lips back in a really ugly grin.

"Midbus tends to think all humans are ugly losers. But the not-so-bad-looking princess is...not-so-bad-looking. Midbus will have her make him sandwiches! Sandwiches and give toe massages!"

"Where did they find this guy from?" Zero whispered.

Grammy and I both drew away, "_Eeewww_!"

"...Let's hope he doesn't win," Grammy whispered.

"Our _next competitor is a Koopa of taste and culture! Of great mind and composure! It's Prince Ludwig the Compooooser!_"

I was surprised to see Ludwig dressed in gray armor. He took a performer's bow and strolled to his spot. Though stern-faced, he peered at me and waved albeit shyly. Grammy and I both waved back. I'm so shocked, why is Ludwig of all people doing this?

"Whaaaaaaat?!" Larry roared, "Luddy's competing?!"

"Luddy!?" Wendy gaped inelegantly, she snatched binoculars from her brother's claws, "_Gimme that_! OMISTARS! It's LUDDY!"

"Dat scrawny punk is gonna get his shell kicked!" Roy laughed darkly, "I'd pay money ta see dis but I get it fuh _free_!"

"Why is Luddy competing?" Junior asked, "It's so cool! I wish I could join! I'd win Mama Daisy! And then her and King Dad could get married!"

"Most interesting..." Morton hummed.

The Koopas in the stands stampeded their feet in a sharp staccato, the rhythm pulsing through the air and adding to the electrifying environment. They even began to loudly chant a tuneless song. The Koopalings crowed with glee, cheering and hopping around, "King Dad!"

"King Daddy!"

"King Pops! Show 'em what 'chu got!"

"_Koopettes and Koopas, Koopalings of all ages...The final combatant is the hell raiser. No gimmicks and smoke mirrors are needed for this Koopa! He's the one, the only..."_

The Koopas were on their feet before the announcer could finish and the Koopalings were screaming wildly. The crowd was so loud I could barely hear the announcer cry out:

"_Kiiiiiiiiiiing Boooowsaaaaaah!_"

The resulting roar was deafening as Bowser stepped under the archway. His smirk was amused and completely self absorbed. He peered around and made a show of 'absorbing' the crowd's energy. He closed his eyes and breathed in the 'electricity.'

"_KING!_"

"_KING!_"

"_KING!_"

He sauntered out arrogantly, threw his head back and released a bloodcurdling roar. As he walked to his designated spot, we locked stares. The entire walk across the coliseum floor he held my stare with blazing intensity. Such an intense stare didn't go unnoticed. In fact many of the coliseum goers peered between us with keen interest and muttered speculation.

A rising buzz of whispers sliced through the coliseum and some of the suitors sharpened their stares. The Koopalings whispered amongst each other with slippery grins and wagging eyebrows. Grammy raised an eyebrow and grinned at me, "Oh my. I think he's clearly trying to tell you something_ Pichi_."

The all-consuming stare, the power behind his stride and the way he never broke eye contact told me he was serious about winning.

_I want you._

By the time he was across the floor and in proper place, I was nearly as red as Mario's shirt. _Geesh, sometimes I have to wonder what goes through Bowser's head. Does he even care that thousands of people saw that!? That stare-down stunt he pulled was_ _as subtle as a puking Cataquack...And if you've ever heard a Cataquack puke then you know it is in fact _NOT_ subtle at ALL._

Bowser stepped beside Ludwig and did a double-take, realizing he stood beside his eldest son. Though Ludwig glared, he pretended to ignore his father's presence. But Bowser wasn't having any of that. He grabbed the Koopaling's shoulder and spun him around, "Wha...? _Ludwig? _What the hell are you doing here?!"

Ludwig peered at him through narrowed slits, "Simple," he replied in a straight voice, "I'm here for the same reason you are."

Bowser growled, mane bristling, "_What? _Don't be stupid! You could get hurt. I don't even know what these games involve but you're wearing _armor _for a reason."

Ludwig snorted, "I believe I've considered the consequences of participating in these games already, _Lord Father._"

"Listen to the Big idiot, little idiot!" Midbus laughed.

Bowser grimaced, "Midbus? Stars what is _this clown_ doing here?"

"It is another chance for Midbus to embarrass Bowser, the biggest loser of the universe!" Midbus snorted with glee.

Rawk Hawk perked up, "What's this? The Rawk thought he heard someone mention that _lame_ King Bowser. The Hawkster is _not_ okay with that steroid-chomping chump!"

Wolfe glowed with amusement, "_Really? _Then maybe you should look to your left, Pheasantman."

Luigi and Silver laughed as Rawk Hawk snapped around, growling. He pointed at them all, eyes narrowed, "The Rawk would like to know the name of the chump who has offended him! I will RAWK you all! You'll ride the pain train—!"

Then he froze as his golden eyes landed on Bowser. He nearly jumped out of his over-puffed feathers, "I-It's K-K-K-ing Bowser! He's like, stalking me! I only wanted to get revenge on the Desert babe!"

Bowser, now in a terrible mood from his quarrel with Ludwig, caught eyes with Rawk Hawk. He blinked before an evil grin grew across his face.

"_Noooooo_! It's like, that violent, gigantic loser!" Rawk whined, cringing and shrinking away, "The prettiest ones are _always_ the first to die! And Rawk Hawk is by _far_ the most gorgeous specimen here! My beautiful face...And my hair didn't get this feathered and luscious without hours of care!"

"We've finally done it!" Zero said with faux awe, "We've found someone with a lower IQ than _Wolfe_."

Wolfe crossed his eyes and mocked Zero, "We've finally done it! B_lah, friggin' blah blah_."

"_These ten warriors will complete for a day with the Amor! The first event will be the chain chomp toss! Each contestant will take their turn and try to toss the chomp the farthest. The chomps come in three sizes: Puny, Basic and Massive. The most points are awarded to the farthest thrown Chomp, and the bigger it is, the better!_"

Silver stepped up to the shot-put pit and rubbed powder in his hands. Three chain chomps—small, medium and large respectively—were sitting in cages. Choosing the heaviest chomp was not ideal for Silver; he was tall and slender, bordering scrawny. His arms shook with strain as he barely lifted the tiny chain chomp off the ground.

The other competitors grinned with varying degrees of amusement as Wolfe cheered for him good-naturedly. Silver nearly tripped over his own feet when he tossed the Chomp. It landed at the fifteen yard mark, which I thought was a good try.

This process was repeated. Rawk stepped up after Zero and cleared his throat with great embellishment, "_AHEM_! I would like to dedicate this throw to the lovely Daisy!" Rawk blew a kiss my direction.

My lip curled in a sneer; I don't want _anything_ from that feathery jerk. The suitors shot incredulous glares as Grammy laughed with delirious glee. How could she think such stupidity was funny?! I glared at her.

"_What a tool_..." Wolfe huffed.

Rawk Hawk was not only making a total ass of himself but he was creating more and more enemies. He tried to pose 'valiantly' and 'suavely' ran a hand through his hair. His antics were actually starting to make foes; competitors who once ignored him were actually noticing him for all the_wrong_ reasons. Just to be macho, he tried to lift the medium-sized Chomp one handed, wobbled, and then nearly toppled over.

The Chomp snapped and barked angrily, almost having been dropped on its head. A flood of laughter rang out across the stadium. Wolfe fell over, clutching his stomach as he bellowed with laughter. Grammy was ever polite and pretended to hide her laughs as the Koopalings squealed with glee.

Rawk must have finally decided to take things seriously because after three spins and a roar of strain, he launched the chomp to an impressive 40-yard mark. I think Wolfe and Ryu were the two surprises for the event. No one thought humans would be a match for a measure of Koopa strength, however these two proved they were strong.

Ryu lifted the medium chain chomp—which I was informed weighed thirty pounds—and threw it an admirable forty yards. Then Wolfe who, was strong by anyone's merit took the medium chomp, spun around three times and flung it an impressive sixty yards. The judges nodded and wrote down scores.

"Not bad fa some puny humans," Roy bobbed his head with acknowledgement.

"Right. They suck _less_ than I thought..." Lemmy hummed.

Then Ludwig appeared; eyes stern, posture tense and ripe with determination. He clapped powder onto his digits and carefully picked up the medium Chomp. Bowser watched with critical eyes, stare unyielding and his eyes seemed to glow under the cast of the strong sun. I wonder how he felt about competing against one of his sons; if his expression was anything to go by, then I'd say he certainly was not happy.

Ludwig took a second deep breath and closed his eyes, slowly exhaling through his mouth as he disconnected from the loud clamor of the crowd. He concentrated, wading through the distracting tumult to find his center.

"Come on Luddy!" Junior cheered, "throw it super far! You can do it!"

"Get 'em big bro!" The twins cried, "Show 'em that conductor magic!"

"Do your best and we shall be proud!" Morton called.

"Aww...Tha little conducta ain't Koopa enough ta throw the biggest chomp?!" Roy sneered with dark glee.

Ludwig's blue eyes snapped open and he clutched the Chomp. His eyes blazed with the heat of battle and with three quick revolutions, he launched the throw. The Chomp soared through the air like a rocket and hit the field with a great thud, rolling to the edge of the field. I gaped; wow! He threw that to the_ 100 yard mark!_

The crowd cheered as Ludwig smirked, nodding before walking off. Roy fell silent as the Koopalings teased him. Bowser stepped up next, rubbing his claws with powder. The crowd roared as their king grabbed the biggest chomp and began to spin, slowly picking up momentum. With a loud roar he tossed the Chomp and sent in flying like a bullet bill. The Chomp landed with a great thud, plopping at the 70 yard mark.

"_The current leader! Kiiiiing Bowserrrrr!_"

The stadium rattled, thousands of feet stomping, thousands of Koopas roaring and thousands more singing; the sound was deafening. Grammy was on her feet cheering as the Koopalings danced around and high-fived one another. As Bowser passed Midbus, the large blubbery magenta warthog intentionally bumped into him. Bowser shot a glance over his shoulder.

"Nice throw _jackaaaaaaass_!" The warthog? Pig? Magenta creature snorted with repulsive laughter, "That SUCKED!_ S-U-K-D_!"

As Midbus snorted with obnoxious laughter, I was expected raging ire and a hotheaded response from Bowser but instead: Bowser simply smirked with a touch of faint amusement, "_Ah Midbus_. I knew I smelt unwashed Chomp ass nearby. Truly an original fragrance."

Luigi and Wolfe hid really obvious laughter as Midbus sneered, nostrils flaring, "Oh yeah?! You know what _you_ smell like?!"

"Like sex and summer nights?" Bowser smirked.

"_LIKE SEX AND SUMMER NIGHTS_!" He bellowed. Midbus paused, crossing his eyes in confusion ,"Uh...Wait I meant like hot...drunk...wiggler uh..._DOOKIE_! HA! Haha yeah! That's what you smell like!"

Bowser sighed tiredly, rolling his eyes with strained patience, "Damn. Got me good there."

"That's right!" Midbus snorted with a wicked grin, "Midbus got you! Midbus can't get got because Midbus is the gotter who got you so don't even think about getting Midbus, got it?!"

Bowser scrunched his brows together in a firm knot of confusion as the other suitors peered at one another skeptically.

"...What the _hell_ did we just hear?" Wolfe blinked, rubbing a finger in his ear.

"The language of stupidity," Taurus's voice was deadpan.

"I think we actually lost IQ the second he opened his moronic mouth," Zero sounded completely unimpressed.

And with that, Bowser patted the warthog on his shoulder derisively and simply turned to walk away. Midbus was smart enough to realize when he had been dismissed. He growled before stomping over to the Chomp cages, "Hey BOWSER get a load of this!"

Grunting with mounting strain, Midbus picked up the largest Chain Chomp and swung it around with great strength and with one last groan, he flung the Chomp nearly as far as Bowser. The derisive sneers and laughter from the watching suitors faltered immediately; though considerably idiotic, Midbus was _still_ a powerful competitor.

Ryu's eyes narrowed thoughtfully, "...Perhaps we have underestimated him too soon. I think he deserves our respect..."

The Koopa officials peered over the results before announcing, "Midbus' throw was 70 yards even!"

Midbus laughed, thrusting his pelvis in a crass victory celebration, "Suck it Bowser! S-U-K it! Suck it real _goooood _baby!"

Zero peered at Ryu with a perfect pokerface, "'Deserves our respect' huh?"

"_The second event will be the projectile contest. In this event each combatant will choose a weapon from our provided arsenal. The combatant must not only accurately hit the target, but they must destroy it to the best of their ability. Creativity, style and skill will be factored into the combatant's score. And of course, the more of the target destroyed, the higher the score!_"

The stadium had an impressive weapon arsenal to choose from with hundreds of shining weapons, chains, daggers, bob-ombs. The less skilled suitors like Silver and Rawk Hawk simply bowled a bomb-omb to the target and let it explode. Zero, strangely enough, shook hands with a Thwomp before it tromped over and body-slammed the target into exploding shrapnel. The Thwomp looked pleased, happily counting a new coin bag it suddenly acquired.

The announcer raised the mic, "_And now Greenstache approaches..._"

Luigi chose a fire flower, his green armor flashing white and lime as he peered at the target in the distance pensively. He released a soft sigh, before launching his fist and a large spiral of green fire barreled towards the target. The green fireball exploded against the target in a raze of heat and power. By the time the last emerald embers died away, half of the large target was destroyed.

Luigi nodded his head; it must have been time to celebrate as he broke out the robot dance. Bowser laughed approvingly and then good-naturedly smacked Luigi's back. That sent Lulu careening face-first into the ground.

"GREENSTACHE!"

"GREENSTACHE!"

King Boo hissed, cupping his hand over his mouth to augment his voice, "_The curtains with you knave! THE CURTAINS!_"

"King Ichabod!" Grammy chided with kind admonition, "Why are you being so unkind to Lord Luigi?"

"_Because,_" King Boo pouted, "_He is nothing but a ninny who sucked me into a cleaner that vacuums..._"

"_Next is Wolfe..._"

Wolfe picked up the ball and chain and with a couple of revolutions, it spun like a propeller, whizzing loudly. With a roar he launched the weapon, smashing the target into pieces. A third of his target remained.

The crowd cheered as Wolfe celebrated with a huge grin and a raised fist in victory. The Koopa judges nodded, muttering amongst themselves and jotting down scores. To continue the impressive efforts, Ryu picked up a wooden bow, took aim and buried his shot in the bull's-eye.

Attached to the arrow was a lit explosive tag and moments later there was a magnificent explosion, stone shattering in every direction. Smoke wafted away to reveal a third of the target left. A raise of cheer flooded the air as Ryu simply turned and walked away, not bothering to look back.

There's no way he couldn't have noticed Bowser's hostile stare; it had to feel like fire on his back. Taurus loaded the bullet bill, stuffing it in the cannon and using a flint stone to light the fuse. He plugged his ears and with a thunderous boom the bullet bill exploded, sailing through the air decimating the target.

Bowser picked up a sizeable Chomp that whined and yipped softly, shyly hiding behind his leg. He patted the chomp's sleek forehead tenderly, "Hey, no need to be nervous Ms. Chom-Chom. It's just the two of us. Relax okay girl? You're with Big Daddy."

The whimpering chomp licked at the comforting hand as he patted her head one last time, speaking softly, "Come on girl, just do this one thing for Daddy and I'll take you back to the kennels and you'll enjoy fresh Chomp treats."

The Chomp nodded and relaxed visibly. Bowser grabbed the chain, wiggling his thick claws to let his digits fall into the best grip by natural settlement. He took a deep breath, features smoothing over with stern concentration as he spun the chomp overhead, speed and power augmenting with each revolution. With one final snap he let her fly. The chomp sailed like a Bullet Bill, smashing through the target, chewing and gnawing viciously as she ripped through. There was nothing left. _Nothing._

Bowser threw his arms up in furious cheer. The pink warthog hybrid was up next, looking none-too-impressed with Bowser's stellar throw. Again he nudged into the king, "That was good. Oh wait it actually _WASN'T_!"

"_It is Midbus the Destroyer's turn..._"

All attention settled onto Midbus and he waddled over to a huge rock and spat on both hands, rubbing them together before hugging the boulder in a tight grip. He grunted, chubby legs wobbling with the weight of strain and with a loud roar, Midbus shot-put the rock with surprising accuracy and power. The target ripped into pieces as the crowd cheered. Again the judges nodded with glee, whispering scores amongst each other.

"Haha! How do you like that?!"

"Let's go Luddanator!" Larry screamed.

As Midbus, moved away, Ludwig was on deck, waiting with a face of nothing but sheer determination.

"Smash that target!" Wendy cheered.

Ludwig picked up a magical scepter, which oddly enough looked a lot like a conductor's rod. He waved the wand with soft, measured movement, as if conducting a ballad and something uncanny occurred.

_"Adagio...Moderato_," Ludwig began waving the wand faster as the vibrations grew larger and louder, "_Allegro...Presto_!"

A wave of fluctuating blue magic floated, shaped like gigantic glowing treble cliffs. The floating stream of treble cliffs kissed the stone target's surface and with each touch released a pitchy note. The crowd fell silent, awed as little by little, the quickening melody began to melt away half of the statue. With his time up, Ludwig finished his composition.

"Magically amplified vibrations," Ludwig spoke softly, "Music is truly more powerful than we give it credit for."

"_The next event, is the dreaded tug of waaaaaar. To expedite things, it will be performed in teams of two. The combatants will draw a number and partners hold matching number._"

They each drew numbers and immediately, "Which of you losers has a two?" Bowser grunted.

"I do."

It was Ryu.

First Bowser was surprised, then it rapidly deteriorated into murderous anger. There should have been an audible sizzling with the way Bowser's eyes blazed. He sneered, smoke billowing from his jowls. "Don't. Screw. Up."

That was the most encouraging thing he could say to his partner?

"I don't think King Bowser much likes him..." Grammy hummed.

"He likes Ryu alright," I laughed dryly, "As much as Wario likes bathing; not at all."

"_The judges have just revealed a two-way tie for first! Tied even are the King and Midbus the destroyer! Trailing in third is the Dragon and Prince Ludwig, and close behind is Wolfe. The tug-o-war is clearly going to determine today's winner!_"

Bowser growled as the other competitors budded off into their separate teams. Bowser and Ryu—boy that would be interesting, Midbus and Zero, Silver and Ludwig, Wolfe and Taurus, and finally Lulu and Rawk Hawk. The rules were simple, pull your opponent into the mud and do as you must to win. The order of the duels were randomized, meaning some of the competitors could go multiple times and some may have to go only once.

In the first round, Team Wolfe was chosen to take on team Weegee. Rawk Hawk was a professional wrestler, a champ at one time who had been Glitzville's undisputed victor. The match was longer than anyone would have thought, Rawk Hawk gave Wolfe a good run for his money but the unquestionable strength of the Canine kicked in.

Though I hated to see Luigi tumble into the mud, I received gratification the moment Rawk Hawk fell in. He shrieked, screaming girlishly as the ground slipped from under him and he plopped in with a disgusting _splat_! He surfaced, completely covered in mud and splashed around shrieking, "No...My hair! _Not my hair_!"

Bowser growled at Ryu, cutting him a dirty glare, "Let's get one thing straight, _Shinobi_: I don't _like_ you but _I_ want to _win_. If winning Flower means playing _nice _with you. Then I'll do _it._"

Either Ryu ignored Bowser's blatant hostility or didn't care; probably a little of both, "We will win with teamwork."

"I'll take anchor, since anchor _is_ the strongest," Bowser glared, hoping to get him with one last snub.

Ryu bobbed his head, remaining unaffected by his partner's blatant hostility, "That works. I'll take lead."

As I learned, the 'anchor' is the stronger of the two and was stationed in the back to well, act as an anchor for the team. Ludwig and Silver were going against Bowser and Ryu. The two teams approached the pit, glares of determination burning and faces hard like stone. Bowser and Ludwig's expressions were closed, eyes dark as they studied one another.

"_Oh! It will be a standoff of kin! Father against son! King versus Prince! Who will win?!_"

The Koopalings looked troubled, peering between their father and eldest brother.

"Who do we cheer for?" Iggy whispered.

"I know who I'm cheerin' fuh!" Roy laughed, he cupped his hands over his mouth to cheer, "Go King Pops! Put 'em in tha muddy drink!"

"Like, maybe we shouldn't cheer this round..." Wendy whispered, biting a coral pink claw in anxiety.

"Back out now and you won't get to taste mud," Bowser grunted.

"Not a chance," Ludwig turned his head away, "I will not keel over simply because _you_ are my opponent."

"I don't want to see a crown prince thrown in the mud like a fool," Bowser growled, "Just _quit_!"

"_No_." Ludwig didn't raise his voice to display his anger; it was all to evident in the burn of his eyes and the clenching of his jaw, "I will not bow to you _King Bowser_ simply _because_. See you in the ring."

Bowser trembled with mounting fury, eyes blazing orange as he watched Ludwig trot away, "_Stupid...Stubborn...Little brat_. What does he get from this?! Why does he _always_ have to fight me at everything _single_ turn?!"

Ryu stood behind Bowser, wisely remaining silent as the two ended their heated quarrel. Bowser growled before taking hold of the rope with a grim expression, eyes clouded from thought. As if unsure of what action to take, Ryu hesitated for a second before taking his place as lead and firmly gripping the rope between his digits. The Shinobi leader turned half of his torso as he peered back at his teammate, "...Lord Bowser—"

"I used to push that Koopaling on swings when he was little," Bowser murmured softly, "And everytime he got an owwie I used to laugh and bandage him...now we can't even do the simplest things together...He hates—" Bowser shook his head, eyes lighting in his fury as he growled, "Fine. He wants to challenge me? Then _fine_. He'll get his ass kicked like everyone else."

The officials counted off the beginning of the game and soon both sides were tugging. Steadily Silver and Ludwig drew closer to the edge of the mud pit. Silver dug in; sweat dotting his hairline as he tugged with all his might. While Ludwig's face was a mask of pure concentration and fury, Bowser barely looked as if he were breaking a sweat. Silver's boots were teetering on the edge of the mud pit and with the loss of another centimeter, he fell into the mud pool with a loud splash.

"_Oh! There goes Silver! And now the prince is left! This does not look good for the prince!_"

Now it was only Ludwig pulling against Ryu and Bowser. I was surprised when Bowser actually slackened his grip and let Ryu do all the pulling. Ludwig began to regain lost ground and began to drag Ryu toward the mud pit. Ryu was strong, but Ludwig was a Koopa imbued with the great beast strength of his creed.

He was beating Ryu!

"Wasting..._Strength..."_ Ryu growled out.

One-handed, Bowser grabbed onto the rope again and gave a vicious yank. The first tug made Ludwig stumble, falling to his knees and the next tug hauled Ludwig right into the mud pit.

"_The King and Dragon advance! For a second the Prince looked to be making headway!_"

Silver and Ludwig waddled out of mud pit, dripping with slabs of grime. Bowser padded over, standing on the dry, clean ground and offered Ludwig his hand. The prince froze. Ludwig's blue eyes flickered with obvious conflict before he pretended to miss the kind gesture. He pulled himself out, sloshing right past his father and right past the out-stretched hand. I cringed at the overt rejection; that was painful to watch. Bowser said nothing, heading back with a closed expression.

The Koopalings were silent until Ludwig walked in front of them. Junior yelled, "Good job Luddy!"

"You were great!" Iggy smiled.

"You almost got that damn human in!" Larry laughed.

Ludwig shied a quick smile at his siblings. He happened to peer in my direction. I smiled, waving and was surprised when he turned his head away, muddy cheeks glowing red. _Hmm, what's with him?_

As Bowser made his way back, Midbus guffawed, "_Hehe_, you dirtied up the scrawny little punk pretty good! How old is that little loser? Five?! Two...Negative three?!"

In a mood for little nonsense, Bowser glowered, eyes dark, "..."

"And here Midbus thought he would get to kick the little shrimp's ass! A Koopa who composes music?! _Ha! _Midbus bets his dad—that's_ you—_is embarrassed about having a sissy like him for a son!"

A deafening 'ooooh' reverberated through the crowd. The Koopalings squawked angrily as Wolfe, who had once been standing near Bowser, cleared away for self-preservation purposes.

"Oh _sheyt_..." I whispered.

Bowser growled wildly, eyes sparking orange as he charged at Midbus; there was no mistaking the intent to spill blood. It took several MagiKoopas to hold him back as their wands glowed, faces strained with effort.

"King Bowser settle down!" One Magikoopa clucked.

"Please settle down Sire! You _will_ be disqualified if you touch him!" Another cried.

"_Whoa ho! Emotions certainly are running high out here! This will make an interesting match in the finals._"

Ryu had enough self-preservation to wait until the hot rage of Bowser's ire cooled to reasonable levels. Though a bit more calm, Bowser clenched his fists until his knuckles bled white with strain as his tail thrashed angrily. He approached his fuming partner, "We have to face off against Wolfe and Taurus."

"Newsflash Shinobi, they're _humans,_" Bowser grunted, still glaring at Midbus, "They'll be easy to pull in."

Ryu crossed his arms, "You underestimate Wolfebane's strength. I've seen him haul a five hundred-pound wrestler out of a ring."

"He's strong for a _human_, I'll give him that, but that's as far as it goes," Bowser grunted dismissively.

Ryu spoke with a thread of resignation, "See farther than your nose, King; Midbus has not had a single match. He and his partner both have fresh arms. By the time we face off against him, it'll be our _third _match."

Bowser finally made a considering look, "You finally said something worthwhile and none of that mystical piranha shit. Let's kick their ass and use as little energy as possible."

"Good plan," Ryu nodded.

Across the field Wolfe and Taurus were pulled in for a huddle, shooting Ryu and Bowser looks every now and then. There was no heated verbal sparring or distain; shocking right? Bowser and Ryu get along as well as oil mixes into water but Wolfe and Taurus were fire and water, dangerous inverses that see no rhyme or reason in the other.

"You think you can pull that big monster into the mud?" Taurus spoke, "that would be the sight to see."

"Considering I've got a huge-ass Koopa to pull, and we're absolutely puny to Bowser, it's no good," Wolfe shook his head, "We're going in that mud pit one way or the other."

"The Shinobi is strong but even he has to grow weary," Taurus rubbed his chin, "Think we can at least pull him in?"

Surprisingly the twosome grinned at one another. Taurus spoke, "If we lose, I want to handicap them _badly_ for the next go. I want them to struggle next round against that warthog idiot."

"I'm down with that," Wolfe laughed darkly.

The twosome stepped up to the mud pit with game faces ready. The countdown reached zero and when the round begun, both teams pulled. Bowser laughed as he and Ryu slowly dragged Taurus and Wolfe closer to the soggy, unwelcoming stretch of mud.

A mixture of disgust and anger flickered on Taurus's face as he was dragged off the podium and flung into the mud. Wolfe growled, crouching lower as he fought back with a surprisingly large amount of strength. Bowser laughed, "Not bad Dogboy! You're pretty strong for a puny human! Kitty would be proud you're not a chump."

"Really?" Wolfe's expression lit up with hope.

"Yeah, but then she'd probably be pissed you went in the mud like a chump."

And with an arch grin, Bowser tugged the rope with a vicious yank and flung a yelping Wolfe head-first into the mud. He surfaced, shaking his head and spitting out mud, "DAMNIT! This mud tastes _nasty_! Ugh! AUGH!"

With bellowing laughter, Bowser helped pull Wolfe out of the mud, who kept slipping and tripping up over his own two feet.

"_This is all what it all comes down to Koopas and Koopettes! Two contestants are tied for first! Will King Bowser win? Or will Midbus the destroyer win the Amor of victory?_"

Midbus laughed, "Midbus will enjoy sending _Queen_ Bowser in the mud! Then Midbus will point at you and laugh! Then Midbus will do a crude gesture to you! And then Midbus will have that not-so-bad-looking human girl lick his toes and pop the pimples on Midbus's back!"

_I quit_. I'm going to chuck my shoe at him. I'm in the front row; I'm sure I can hit him from here. Or maybe I can just hop down to that arena floor and drive my foot up his ass. The four contestants encroached, eyes burning with the glow of competition. This was for all the marbles and for who I'd spend the rest of the day with. If Bowser screwed this _up, _I'd kill him.

I don't know how hard it would be to terminate an eight foot Koopa, but I'd try my hardest. Bowser and Ryu settled on one end as Midbus and Zero reached the other. They grabbed the rope and with the final countdown, they began the final round.

I nearly screamed as Bowser and Ryu began losing ground against Midbus and Zero. The ache of fatigue and strain must have burned their muscles and the two earlier matches must have overwrought their strength.

Bowser grit his teeth, a fury of concentration scourged his face as he locked his arms and dug his feet into the ground for better traction. Midbus dragged them closer to their end, inch by inch. The obnoxious warthog sneered with wicked glee as his flabby arms tugged, dragging Ryu and Bowser perilously towards the edge of their platform. Ryu's foot nearly touched the cliff of the pool. A smatter of sweat glinted on his forehead as the muscles in his arms grew taunt with stress.

Bowser peered right at Midbus, who was grinning wickedly. Then, a slow grin crawled across the king's maw, "I wanted to see your best Midbus and I gotta say...I stand unimpressed."

"_What_? You're about to loser, loser!" Midbus laughed.

"You've been weighed, measured and found wanting," Bowser laughed with dark zeal, "And now... I kick your ass. _Again_."

The smile wiped from his face as Bowser snarled furiously, yanking Ryu as if he was nothing but a life-sized ragdoll. The sudden violent jolt backwards surprised Ryu as he staggered, nearly toppling over. With another strong tug from the King, Ryu was cleared from the edge. Bowser growled, performing another solid tug as he jerked Zero and Midbus closer to the pit.

With labored effort, Bowser slowly dragged Midbus and Zero, yanking them along brusquely like misbehaved Chain Chomps. Zero cursed, staggering as Midbus gaped in disbelief. Grammy rose to her feet and cheered, "You show 'em King Bowser!"

"Get 'em King Dad!" Junior whooped.

"_The king! The king is dragging them! Holy Stars! What power! What sheer strength! Can he do it?! Or will he burn out?!_"

With each step back, Bowser slowly dragged Zero and Midbus forward with jarring tugs. Midbus growled, digging his feet into the floor and centering his gravity. He was sweating buckets, tugging against Bowser's offense; I don't know why but I bet Midbus stank _terribly_.

Midbus wheezed loudly, arms straining with fatigue as Zero pulled. Bowser and Ryu pressed their advantage, dragging them closer to the edge of their platform. Zero grimaced, staring into the unwelcoming, filthy slosh of mud.

With dual strain from Bowser and Ryu, Zero toppled into the mud pit like a domino. Midbus growled; fatigued arms baking and tired muscles protesting the strain. His clawed talons scraped against the edge of the stage with desperation.

"Shinobi," Bowser growled, "Wish the pink jackass goodnight."

Ryu actually barked out a laugh, "Goodnight Midbus."

"This isn't the last of Midbus you scaly jerk!" Midbus growled, knowing he was licked, "Midbus will see you—!"

Midbus lunged forward, screeching as he plopped into the mud with a resounding splat. Once the battle was won, Ryu wiped the sweat from his forehead. The victors peered at each other and Bowser, though glaring, barely nodded his head; it was the stiffest nod of acknowledgement I had ever seen.

"_The victors are the King and the Dragon! Which would make King Bowser the ultimate victor!_"

A shattering bellow of cheers rose as the Koopas stood, throwing their fists in the air. Bowser grinned, raising an arm in the air of victory. Grammy and I cheered wildly, laughing and jumping happily.

"You have to give him the rose of victory!" Grammy smiled, "Go on _Pichi_! I've got my camera ready!"

The Matron appeared with a smile, motioning my follow. We trailed down an exclusive set of steps that led to the coliseum floor. The thunderous rumbles and cheers shook the floor under my feet. I wasn't even competing and I felt nervous. I peered at the Matron who smiled, "And now, you grace them with your presence."

"What do I do after that?" I asked.

"The announcer will tell you," she smiled.

She gracefully motioned, and taking a deep breath, I stepped out before millions, holding the rose of victory clutched to my chest.

"_And here comes the Maiden of Amor!_"

There were cheers, whistles and catcalls as I marched over to the awaiting combatants. Bowser turned to face me completely, straightening up suddenly. I approached until I was encircled by the combatants; I felt so small around the tall group of guys.

They were all staring intensely;_ geesh_ as if they haven't seen a _girl_ in their life before. Their piercing stares made my cheeks glow as I smoothed my gown with discomfort. Wolfe's face glowed red as he tried to wipe the last of the mud off his face as Silver self-consciously slicked his muddy bangs from his face.

"_Repeat after me fair Maiden,_" the announcer smiled, "_'I now present to you, Victor, your Amor of Victory.'_"

I turned to Bowser, whose sharp smile grew, "I now present to you, Victor, your Amor of Victory."

The announcer grinned, "_And as is tradition, the princess shall reward her victor with a kiss._"

I froze; jaw dropping. I peered at Bowser who donned a crooked smirk. He shrugged helplessly in a way that was far _too_ innocent. He was filthy, sweaty and crusted with a taupe film of dust and grime. But those red eyes of his glowed like fire. I realized everyone was waiting for me. The roar of the crowd had settled into sparse mutters as even the combatants peered at me expectantly.

The displeasure all but glowed vibrantly in Wolfe's eyes as Silver frowned. Taurus stared hard, eyes burning as Zero remained perfectly blasé, brows furrowed. And Ryu? The Shinobi heir was _sweaty_..._filthy_...armor fitting that lean torso oh _so_ perfectly. _Dirty boys_ needed to be cleaned up...

_Ugh! Mental slappage! Mental slap!_

I peered at Bowser, swallowing thickly. He wasn't making a single move; he was waiting on _me_ to initiate the kiss. Like a knight, he took a knee and with a soft breath, I planted a kiss to his soaked temple. I was surprised when a crow of displeasure roiled in the crowd and there were even a sprinkle of boos. Stunned, I pulled back, blinking at the revolting mass.

"_Real kiss! Real kiss!_" The crowd began to chant until the cheer caught on like wildfire and spread through the entire coliseum.

Bowser froze as the audible chant saturated the air.

"_What's this? The crowd wants a real kiss_!"

I blushed maroon as some even began a crude chant of, "_Tongue! Tongue! Tongue!"_

I gaped at Bowser with a sluice of ice racing down my spine; he couldn't _possibly _expect me to...to kiss him like _that?!I haven't even...I...I can't do it! _Bowser laughed softly, "I think we better get this over with before they get worse."

My voice was a pathetic squeak, "You w-want me to T-Tongue k-k-k—!?"

He smiled, shaking his head, "I'm not tryin' to give these people a show. I'm not going to embarrass you."

Mollified, I breathed a sigh of relief, "Thanks..."

"So," an arch grin spread across his face, "Can I kiss you now?"

My perpetual blushing can't be healthy; all the blood rushing to my head was starting to make me dizzy as my heart fluttered. I was fairly new to the bliss of kissing; couldn't this be done without thousands of rabid bystanders!?

"Y-Yeah..." I whispered, averting my eyes from his crooked grin.

"Close your eyes..." he purred.

I swallowed audibly, snapping my eyes shut. A smooth claw grazed my cheek, softly turning my head. There was a soft rise of 'Oohs!' And a chorus of whistles from the crowd. Then soft warmth touched my lips and a flood of liquid heat blazed in the pit of my stomach. A raise of thunderous cheers broke forth, and following were roars of disappointment flooding in when the kiss ended all too soon. I blinked, eyes fluttering as Bowser peered at me with a small grin.

"Give it to her King Dad!"

"King dad you ladykiller, you!"

"It's like a fairytale! OmiStars!"

"King Dad kissed Mama Daisy!"

Bowser rose to his feet, offering his hand, "Now that I officially won some alone time, you ready to begin our tour without the other losers?"

My head was still spinning and the cuckoo birds were still chirping, "Yeah...sure..."

He smirked, "I had to beat the others just to get you alone. Completely worth it. We'll take Grammy too."

I was surprised when Bowser gently took my hand, entwining two of his gigantic fingers with mine. We met eyes and with a growing smirk, he gave my hand a gentle squeeze we walked out of the coliseum hand in hand. The crowd was on their feet cheering and screaming as we walked out of the arena. The fans were littering rose petals over the arena and onto our heads. I laughed as a shower of fragrant, beautiful petals littered the air.

"Uh Bowser?"

"What's up my little Amor?"

"You think you could...Shower first or something?"

He paused, "You tryin' to tell me I got serious BO?"

I laughed, "No! You're just dirty and all..."

"_Women..._" Bowser rolled his eyes, with amusement, "Never understand the masculine power of sweat and grime."

"I understand the power of a shower!"

We both laughed.

* * *

><p>One fifteen minute shower produced a freshly scented, clean Koopa king. We took a brand-new, sleek clown copter and the three of us were sailing in the blazing ruby skyline. Grammy was busy snapping photos as I stood beside Bowser, "So where to first?"<p>

He smirked, "I've been trying to decide if I should blow your mind now or later. And I've decided to do both."

I laughed, "Have you ever _not_ been sure of yourself?"

"Probably not," he grinned right back, "Unless you like _humble_ guys..."

The approaching horizon glowed flame-red with the fire of volcanic activity. Coifing billows of hot, blistering smoke flumed the air, spreading in the sky like split liquid. A chain of glowing volcanoes blazed red, peaks frothing and bubbling with magma and fire.

"We're going to a volcano?" I mused.

Bowser shot a mysterious grin my way, "It's a tiny surprise."

"The Darklandian Crown of the Kings," Grammy hummed knowingly.

Bowser laughed, "And I just can't get one past you, can I Grammy?"

"The _what_?" I asked.

"I would tell you but I don't want to ruin the king's surprise," Grammy smiled, "I won't say any more."

_Crown of the Kings?_ What did these volcanic chains have anything to do with crowns and kings? The clown copter landed outside of the most monumental of the dormant volcanoes. Bowser gallantly helped Grammy and I out the copter and spearheaded, guiding us to the dark entrance.

It was nearly pitch-black, save for the eerie rows of torches weakly illuminating the rocky pathway. The thick shroud of darkness and hollow silence was creepy, there wasn't even a single scratch of a bug crawling away or any other critter skittering.

I carefully took Grammy's arm within mine as we walked to the center of the volcano and it must have been where Bowser wanted us to be. He turned to face us and motioned, "Here we are," he spoke softly, "Ladies, this is the Crown of Kings."

The jagged volcanic walls were filled with rows of torches, spiraling and wrapping up the wall until the torches faded from sight. Most of the torches were doused, with only the closest torch alive with flicking flames.

Under each torch were words written in beautiful Darklandian cursive. The deep mahogany expanse of volcano reached far above, towering and dwarfing overhead until its cavernous walls disappeared completely from sight.

"What _is_ this place?" I asked with awe.

"This is the volcano better known as the Crown of Kings," Bowser spoke with a bit of reverence, "the torches you see around you were once lit during each king's lifecycle. Once they perished, their flames are doused forever."

The towering, rocky volcanic walls were covered in so many torches and yet only the last torch was lit; because it was _Bowser's_ flame, the most recent Darklandian king. It was creepy, morbid even but there was something truly phenomenal about the visualization of the innumerable predecessors.

I walked over to the last glowing flame. I studied the Darklandian cursive and swept a finger across the beautiful calligraphy. I felt Bowser step beside me, studying my expression. I barely heard him whisper, "What are you thinking?"

"How do you say your name in...your native tongue?" I asked, "Like the way it's written on this plaque."

For a moment surprise lay bare on Bowser's face until a slow grin crawled across his snout. Smirking, he growled coarsely in a deep, rumbling bass; though I couldn't apprehend a real name within his primal gnarr, I did pick up two-syllables, like _Bow-ser_?

"So this is your life flame?" I whispered, smiling up at him. Then I tried to growl his name in Darklandian which roused a riotous laughter from the king, "It sucked that badly huh?"

"_Not bad_!" He boomed with mirth, "Not bad at all for a first try. But yep, this is my life symbol. The fire came straight from the holy magma pits blessed by Magikoopa priests," Bowser rolled his eyes, shaking his head, "big to do over nothing if you ask me. But I just..._I dunno_, wanted to show you something I've never showed_ anyone_."

I smiled, "I'm touched Bowser. And I read about this. How your flame is a symbol of your life. And if its blown out before its rightful time it's a...curse right?"

He looked impressed, "More like a bad premonition. I didn't know you were interested in Darklandian culture."

"Well of course! I studied Darklandian culture when I first became a diplomat for Sarasaland," I smiled shyly, "I wanted to respect your culture...And I didn't want to offend."

"You? Offend _me_!? Well ain't that _cute_," he grinned, "You just keep on impressing me with everything you do Flower...You're really...something else..."

"We have a ton of books about Darklandian culture, but y'know they're all super outdated, published in the 1950's," I blushed, moving a stray lock behind my ear, "I think some of the culture is beautiful...Like the flame-blowing before a bride and groom kiss...And a flame is lit when a Koopaling is born."

His expression softened, "You like that huh? I could teach you more. Or at least give you reading material from this decade."

I laughed, "I would like that. I figured your torch would be somewhere majestic."

"Everyone's torches are in a volcano," he mused, "this place is specific for the Darklandian kings. The volcano is mostly dormant and it blazes every now and then and rekindles my torch."

"King Bowser," Grammy popped in between us, "I think you ought to tell _Pichi _the meaning _behind_ this act, don't you think...?"

"Huh? What do you mean Grammy?" I blinked at her as a bead of sweat rolled down Bowser's cheek.

She smirked, coyly resting her head against her palm, "When a Koopa reveals his life flame there's a..._significance _behind it."

When we both peered at Bowser, his face flamed dark red; it was obvious, even under the weak lighting, "Uh...W-Well, y-you see Flower...Uh...Usually w-when a Koopa takes a person...usually a person of the _opposite gender, _i-it symbolizes how...i-important they are...So yeah._ There._ I said it. Y-You're _pretty _important."

I smiled, "Bowser..."

Grammy grinned, "But most importantly coming here symbolizes Bowser surrendering his heart to you, _Pichi_."

I froze, eyebrows shooting to my hairline, "Bowser is this...true?"

I peered at Bowser and if possible, his face bled a deeper red. He rounded on Grammy and bellowed, flapping his arms wildly, "G-GRAMMY!? _W-WHAT THE HECK!? Y-YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL HER ALL OF THAT_!"

Grammy chuckled softly, "Now, now young shell, no need to be embarrassed..."

"_E-Embarrassed!? Who's embarrassed!?_" Bowser roared; yup, he totally was.

"That means a lot Bowser," I whispered, "You're...the only suitor who has been so honest..."

As Bowser continued to squawk at Grammy for 'betraying' him, I studied the lone flame. Someday would Bowser's torch be a doused, worn-away stump like the other kings of the past? I pushed away such a morbid thought, not wanting to ponder a day where he could be _gone... _The wall of torches towered so high I couldn't see all of the doused torches.

Bowser lightly touched my shoulder and motioned me to follow. I peered at the flickering flame one last time before going, "I've got another place I want to take you."

"Alright..."

The visit to the Crown of Kings had left me breathless and slightly overwhelmed. The looming presence, the greatness of so many past kings lingered like a wraith and seeing the doused flames put so many things into perspective: they were once alive and like them, there will come a time when the flame of your life will be snuffed.

The majestic volcanic chains faded from sight as a surprising green strip of land steadily crept closer. I peered at Bowser questioningly, "The Darklands has pretty green land?"

He rolled his eyes, "For your_ information,_ volcanic soot is very rich with minerals, nutrients and other junk that makes good soil. Apparently we have sucky-ass PR; _everyone_ and their mother seems to think the entire kingdom is a dead wasteland. Expand your horizons a bit Flower."

I laughed as Grammy flanked our side, "And where to now Lord Bowser?"

Bowser turned to Grammy with a soft smile, "There's something I want _you_ to see."

The copter landed at one of the strings of bright green islands. A lofty black obelisk was tall enough to pierce the sky and surrounding it were other slender, looming obelisks; this meadow was a beautiful cemetery with plenty of flora, trees and opulent statues of Koopas frozen in heroic poses.

Grammy peered at Bowser with disbelief, "Where are we...?"

He smirked, "This is a place I want you to visit because I know it'll mean something to you. It's more for you than your granddaughter, no offense Flower."

"None taken," I laughed.

As we traveled through the serene cemetery, Grammy's lucid eyes grew cloudy; did she know where we were? I was starting to worry about her. Bowser took one more right and came to a stop. Bowser rocked back on his heels, arms folded behind his back—if he could—playfully as he peered at Grammy with an arch grin, "And here's my surprise for you Grammy..."

He scooted aside and grinned. A life-sized stone Koopa statue was erected beside a monumental catacomb. The stone Koopa, though fierce, reminded me of Bowser; they shared similar features, the same stern, strong eyes and a defined jaw line.

"Ta-_da_," he chuckled softly, "What do you think?"

Grammy stepped forward, eyes round with surprise and marvel. She stared up at the Koopa statue wordlessly, unmoving for a long time. She finally stretched a tentative hand towards the stone face. Her hands visibly shook as her eyes glinted with glistening tears.

"Grammy...?" I whispered.

Both Bowser and I were terrifically surprised when Grammy read the grave fluently. _Whoa, Grammy knew Darklandian?!_ She turned to Bowser with a film of unbroken tears shining in her eyes.

Her voice trembled with overflowing emotion, "This is...this is Serous's grave...?"

Bowser nodded, a small smirk present, "You said you never had the chance to visit his grave. I thought I'd help out a kind empress."

It was completely unexpected when Grammy collapsed into tears, hugging Bowser tightly. The king froze, true surprise glowing on his face, "Uh...?"

"You do not know how much this means to me," Grammy wept openly, "Thank you King Bowser. I can finally see my friend after so many long years...I..._Oh Stars_...My heart is singing..."

She sank to her knees, peering up at the stone monument of King Serous, continuing to weep deeply; I had never seen her cry before. It wrenched my heart; watching someone I loved in such pain nearly made me produce tears of my own. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, "_Granna_..."

I went to comfort her but Bowser gently restrained me, his expression unusually compassionate, "Let her be Flower. I think she's really happy right now. She's just overcome with emotion."

I peered back; Grammy was hunched over the grave, whispering and gently stroking the flowers, "It's been awhile hasn't it dear friend? I'm afraid I've grown a little grayer and a bit more worn since we last spoke. Didn't I tell you I'd see you again? So much has happened. Where should I begin...?"

Bowser smiled with such rare tenderness that I did a double-take. I drank in the gentle glow of his eyes and the muted curve of his grin. I realized I was staring _too _long when his expression altered into confusion, "...What is it? You've been staring..."

It felt like thousands of tiny candles were lit in my cheeks, "Uh...I-It's nothing...Let's just give Grammy some time to herself."

We ambled away, allowing Grammy a moment to properly grieve her friend. The adjacent mausoleum was King Morton's and as we passed his fierce statue, I thanked the Stars Bowser looked more like his grandfather.

Even depicted as a stone statue, King Morton gave me the creeps, he looked cruel; burly physique etched with jagged scars, a malicious sneer and cold, unfeeling eyes that seemed to follow your movement.

I don't know how much time passed as we strolled through the cemetery, laughing and sharing one another's company but it didn't bother me; when I was with Bowser the fabric of time unraveled and desisted. The golden sun glowed against our backs in a brilliant aura of warmth. I peered at my friend, "Bowser..."

"Hmm?" he mumbled thoughtlessly.

Under the luminosity of midday's burn, his eyes blazed like fire. They really were a pretty shade of red; it was as if his eyes sparked with electricity. The sun made the scales on his arms glow like flecks of molten gold.

"You did something really great back there for Grammy," I whispered, "I...I've never seen her so...emotional. But in a good way y'know? I think she was holding that in for too long."

He growled contently, "Bet Gramps would have liked that too."

Bowser had revealed more of himself than all of my other suitors combined, and though he was speculated as evil and fiendish, he had one of the biggest, most valiant hearts I knew. His rage and fury was a suffocating, awful facet of his personality but then there were tender, glowing moments, moments like these that made me see past his darkness.

"Bowser..." I whispered, "bend down a bit, you have something on your cheek. Let me get it for you."

As he did so, I seized the opportunity and softly pressed my lips against his cheek. His scales were smooth and warm like sun-baked river stones. I pulled away and whispered breathlessly against the side of his mandible, "Thank you..."

He drew away, face dark-red and jaw hanging. He had a perfect cherry-red lip imprint glowing on his cheek. He stared at me wide-eyed, a hand holding the place where I had kissed him. Bowser whispered with awe, "Y-You _kissed _me..."

"Y-Yeah..." I whispered nervously.

"W-What was that for? N-Not that I'm complaining, _hell_, a Koopa _wants_ to know what he's gotta do to get _summa that_ on the regular."

I felt the burn of blush as I smiled, "You did something really nice for my Grandmother. S-So...yeah thank you."

His stupor turned into a huge glowing grin. He was still bright-red as he bellowed with laughter, rubbing the back of his head. He was laughing so hard sparks flew from his mouth, "_Ahahaha_! That's why?! _Shiiiiiiit_, you got me glowing like a Fire flower on drugs! That was _nothing_! I'm _happy_to help that cute lil ole lady!"

Then he purred in a gravelly voice, "And I'd do _anything_ for you. Just say the word Flower..."

He nuzzled my nose, purring amorously. His good mood was infectious as I returned his affectionate nuzzle. The reward of his broadening smile was worth it. Tough Koopa kings weren't supposed to purr like cute blitties.

I was stunned when he grabbed my hand and with a playful wink pressed a hard kiss against my knuckles. I flushed dark-red when I realized he had no intention of letting go anytime soon.

"_Oh-hooooo_, your skin taste like raspberries," he shot a wicked grin my way.

My face flamed red, "_B-Bowser!_ Stars! Do you _even _think about half the things you say!?"

Bowser laughed wickedly, eyes narrowed, "You think _that _was bad? _Well. _Do you _know _what I'd do to you and that yummy raspberry skin? Flower I could just lick you _aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall_ day—"

"Am I interrupting _something_...?"

Oh crap. Grammy alert! I repeat, _Grammy alert_!

Grammy stood under a halo of sunlight, blue eyes bright and hair aglow under the burn of daylight. Her mauve lips curved into a suspicious smile. She peered at Bowser and arched an amused eyebrow, patiently tapping her foot against the soil.

"Erm..._Crap..._" Bowser jerked away, trying to slowly withdraw as if _that _would make things any less awkward, "N-Not at all my queen. We weren't doin' jack diddly."

Too bad guilt was written all over his face. Grammy's eyes twinkled with wicked glee as she tittered quietly, "I certainly hope not. It's getting late don't you think? I'm sure my _Pichi_ is famished after so much excitement. Now let's get back to the palace _Mr. 'All day_.'"

Bowser's slack-jawed expression only made me laugh harder. As we headed for the clown copter, Grammy paused, turning to peer at Bowser with an arch grin, "By the way Lord Bowser...?"

"Yes...?" he still looked sheepish.

"That shade of lipstick on your cheek goes _quite_ well with your complexion," she smirked before turning away.

Bowser's eyes popped open as his face burned red with blush. Despite my own embarrassment, I burst out laughing. The sun had began its descent, flaring garnet-red in the early evening skyline. As Bowser helped load us into the clown copter, he caught sight of his reflection and did an obvious double-take.

"What?" I asked curiously.

He studied his reflection with a large grin, delicately fingering the red lipstick stamp on his cheek, "Nothing. Everything's _perfect._"

* * *

><p>Meanwhile in one of the Bowser Keep's built in mall shops, Lemmy Koopa hummed merrily, finishing up the final touches of a prank. A prank he had crafted <em>especially <em>for his dear sister. Wendy, aka 'the target' was completely unsuspecting, happily snooping around the shop, holding up different dresses to her figure.

Lemmy leaned against a door, whistling inconspicuously. When no one was watching, he swung into the deserted girl's dressing room and began setting up the prank for his sister to walk into; she always tried on clothes. Once the bucket of paint wobbled precariously atop the doorframe, Lemmy stepped back to admire his handy work.

_Red paint did always suit Wendy's complexion..._

Then there was a shrill shriek that made him nearly jump out of his shell, "_Eeeeeeeeek!_ A-A boy! _Shoo_! Get out of here now mortal!"

"Huh?"

He saw a glittering pink curtain rattling and as he approached, the valance slowly slipped open. A female boo with aqua eyeshadow and two large crimson bows on either sides of her head gaped back at him in mortification.

In the forefront of his mind, it struck him how pretty she was. The ghoul held up a shirt to modestly 'cover' herself as she shrieked girlishly. Her scream distorted with an eerie ghoulishness, traveling like sonar as her keening wail shattered the room's mirrors, windows and the lights flickered spookily. Lemmy staggered away, gaping at the unworldly spectacle.

"W-What in the world is wrong with you?! _Y-You mortal creep_!" She snapped, white cheeks glowing pink, "Don't you know it's quite _rude_ to waltz into a ladies' changing room?! _Hmph!_ Trying to peek on a pretty young Booette like myself?!"

Lemmy blinked, stunned, "But you don't have anything to hid—"

Before he could finish, she walloped him with a matching red fan, smacking a myriad of stars into his vision. She hovered inches away from his face, eyes glowing a demonic red. As she screamed, her voice mutated; as if she spoke with multiple voices, "**_Intrude on me again and I will possess your sooooooul!_**"

"Whoa!" He blinked, raising his hands in universal surrender, "My bad! I didn't know anyone was in here! I'm sorry Miss...?"

"I'm _Lady_ Bow you shameless simpleton! As if you're even _deserving _of my fair name, " she sniffed, "My father will hear of this and you will be sorry you scaly sack of flesh!"

With a haughty sniff she made sure to shove past him, floating away but when she reached the doorframe, she shot one last appraising glance at him through the corner of her eyes, "Such a shame...you were kinda _cute_."

Like a summer breeze, she floated through the wall, nose held to the air with feminine indignation. Cheek smarting terribly, Lemmy stared after the boo in awe. Larry appeared seconds later grinning, "Dude Wendy should be here in any sec! She's gonna scream and rage!"

"Uh huh..." Lemmy seemed dazed.

"Everything's good to go right?"

"Uh huh..."

Larry squinted an eye, "You're a doofus face with buckteeth and a soft shell."

"_Uh huh_..." Lemmy sighed dreamily.

Lemmy was still dazed, a hand still clutched to his cheek where the girl had hit him. Larry arched an eyebrow, "Dude! What's with that goofy look on your face!?"

"Dude..." Lemmy whispered, green eyes wide, "I...I think I might be _crushin_'."

* * *

><p>Ryu exited the palace walls and stepped outside. His scarf danced in the balmy wind as he ambled over to where Luigi, Wolfe, Silver, and Zero were standing around, talking amongst each other quietly. Luigi and Silver acknowledged him with a small smile.<p>

"Why the hell are we out here?" Wolfe grunted with an unusually jaded expression.

"For a change I agree with Wolfe," Zero huffed, "If the Princess isn't involved, I have no need to be near you idiots."

"Ouch..." Luigi whispered.

Zero laughed, "Oh _please_, let's not _pretend _we even like each other. If I was civil to you, it's merely to keep up appearances. We _are _competing for the same girl after all."

Wolfe smiled, "Well if that's the case..."

He stepped closer to Zero until he was a few inches away, looming over him with an ominous glower. Golden eyes narrowed as he spoke in a guttural whisper, "If it weren't for Daisy, I would have kicked your _ass _a long time ago. You and Taurus both. Keep trying me with your bullshit comments and you'll find yourself in trouble soon."

Puppo growled on his shoulder, fur spiking up like a hedgehog. The two of them stared at each other with burning glares and the tense atmosphere only made Silver grow more nervous. Luigi stepped back, in case something _did_ happen.

"P-Prince Taurus wished to speak to u-us of something urgent," Silver whispered, twiddling his thumbs.

"Therefore I asked 'why the hell are we out here,' I don't even like that guy," Wolfe huffed, arms crossed over his torso, "Hell, I've been considering kicking his ass for half the stuff he said to me."

Puppo barked something from Wolfe's shoulder that only made him shrug, "Yeah, who _can_ trust the smell of cheap cologne? I can't either, Pups."

"Taurus has no reason to speak with us if he doesn't get something out of it," Ryu spoke considering, blue eyes narrowed speculatively, "Our notice benefits him whether we know the ulterior motive or not."

"I second that." Zero added.

"Ah the party's all here."

Taurus approached with a languid, nonchalant grace; hands stuffed within pockets, collar upturned and a sharp grin dancing upon his lips. Under the scorching Darklandian sun, his slicked-back amber locks blazed in a lustrous silver corona as his expensive cream-colored, Goomba Armani three-piece suit did nothing but glorify the prince's long, lean physique.

Wolfe barely hid his lip-curling sneer as Taurus entered the circle. It didn't go noticed by the others how he knocked into Wolfe's shoulder. Wolfe growled audibly, eyes darkening as he stepped forward, ready to make a go at him, but Ryu's hand to the shoulder stopped the Canine heir.

"Hello gentlemen," Taurus cooed smoothly, looking at them through lowered lashes, "I summoned you here because I wanted to bring something to your attention. I've had my suspicions for awhile but now I find them well-founded."

"And those are _what_ exactly?" Zero asked.

"First and foremost," Taurus spoke in a perfectly casual voice, "One, I detest you _all_ and two, I only tell you this because it helps _me. _Now that we got that out of the way, King Bowser and Princess Sarasaland have been in violation of our treaty. The seven of us were to never have..._relations_ with the princess."

Surprise was bared, "_What_?"

Wolfe laughed darkly, "Get the hell outta here dude. I could smell if they got it on. Come again Overlord Dipshit."

Luigi hid a muffled laugh though Taurus didn't bat an eye, "When they separate from tonight's date, I want you to test that theory," Taurus smirked, "I bet you'd be surprised. I personally do not like the idea of receiving something I'm not promised."

"You have no proof," Zero replied.

"Have you _seen_ the way they stare at each other?" Taurus asked, a single eyebrow raised, "did any of you find it odd how his children knew her, they break protocol and forget titles far_ too_ often for it to be coincidental. Come on Ryu, you're supposed to be sharp, it didn't strike you as odd?"

"..." Ryu remained silent.

Luigi huffed, "She-a works as a diplomat every-a weekend to help the relation between-a Sarasaland and the Darklands."

"And yet there is an _extreme_ lack of protocol and regulation between them," Taurus replied, "They've been hiding a secretive relationship."

"If I didn't know any better," Ryu's eyes narrowed just the slightest, "I'd think you had something against the Princess. Just my speculation."

"Tough crowd I see," Taurus laughed softly, "Hard evidence is needed."

From one of his pockets Taurus produced a manila envelope and handed it to the Shinobi head. Ryu carefully opened the tab and produced a thick stack of photos. The suitors crowded in, taking a handful each. Taurus watched calmly as the photos were studied.

In one set of photos Bowser and Daisy were dressed up at a theater, in another they vacationed on a yacht and the last, but most incriminating was a photo of them on a beach and Princess Daisy wore a _teeny-weeny_ red bikini cradled in King Bowser's arms.

That photo for _some mysterious reason_ was studied the most. Even the most stolid, equable suitors performed a long double-take. Eyebrows rose, jaws dropped, necks craned closer and...

"_Mama Mia_..." Luigi whispered, face burning red.

"Damn that's a good body. I'd sop up milk with a biscuit and eat off of _that_," Wolfe whispered none-too-quietly under his breath.

Silver was too flustered to speak as Ryu narrowed his eyes.

Taurus smirked, "Just a heads up for you boys."

"This s-seems wrong," Silver whispered, a frown marring his soft features, "I can't see anything good c-coming with this..."

"What are you going to do with these? Leak them to the press? Sell them to the tabloids?" Zero asked.

"Emperor Sakuro will flip-a out," Luigi frowned.

"Not just that," Ryu whispered, "this could hurt Princess Daisy's modest reputation as well."

"No..." Taurus smiled mysteriously, "I just wanted to see what you all thought. Am I right? There's something between them? It has to make you wonder what she's _doing_ to 'convince' him to pass all their tariffs and new legislation. King Bowser is more stubborn than ten mules, and_suddenly_ he is passing new treaties without a _single _hitch? _Tch_."

A uniform silence settled over the five suitors. A princess was a chaste totem of virtuous purity and morale; there was a _reason_ they wore full-length dresses and gloves after all; they were supposed to be modest and maidenly, seen as upstanding ladies.

The tabloids always went crazy when they saw skin above Princess Peach's knees. Or when she wore her athletic tennis skirt and the same applied when Daisy was caught wearing athletic tennis shorts during the Mario Star tournaments.

Wolfe didn't or rather wouldn't know the difference between this culture and his; Land's End was hot and being completely covered was not only illogical but a dreadful recipe for heatstroke.

Most Canine girls wore halters and tube tops under a steady ninety-five degree forecast. But the other suitors understood the ramifications of these photos perfectly well. The photos they held were slanderous and could potentially be utilized as a weapon or blackmail.

"What do you guys think?" Taurus asked.

"There's no question in my mind that King Bowser is in love with her." Zero answered honestly.

"I didn't want you all in the dark," Taurus spoke as if he were bored, "I've been trying to figure out if we've really ever had a fair shot at Princess Sarasaland to begin with. We reall—"

A catchy cell phone jingle went off and Taurus blinked, "Ah, bet that's Rogueport. Excuse me gentlemen but I must take this one."

He pulled a sleek silver phone from his pocket and with a flick of his thumb flipped it open. In three long strides Taurus was nearly halfway across the courtyard and nearly out of hearing range, "Don Pinata! Hey, how are things going with the latest shipment? Good? Great. I just wanted to check on things—"

"I can't _stand_ that guy," Wolfe curled his lip in a sneer, baring a sharp incisor, "he's a pompous prick."

"Wow, that was a big word Wolfesbane," Zero arched an eyebrow, "we should give you a gold star."

"Wow Zero you're a jerkass! We should give you a gold star!" Wolfe spoke in the same fake, sugary-happy voice, "Kiss my ass dude."

Zero laughed as Silver frowned, "What was the point in him s-showing us this?"

"Besides making us question the princess's morale," Ryu hummed thoughtfully, "he's also showing us he's been keeping tabs on the princess, I wouldn't be surprised if this included us as well."

Luigi frowned, "What should-a we do?"

"We will travel to the Aqualands tomorrow," Zero spoke, "I don't think there's any appropriate actions we can take just yet."

"I'm keeping my eyes on him," Wolfe growled, squinting his eyes and pointing to them, "Puppo too and nothing gets past the golden eyes of the Canines!"

Ryu nodded his head and walked away, heading back to the palace. The other suitors muttered amongst each other quietly. As a Shinobi who had dedicated his life to honing both his mental and physical prowess, his intuition was all but screaming at him.

Something with Taurus in general didn't feel kosher. _Who the hell kept tabs this closely on a girl anyway?_ Then a flicker of an approaching aura stole his attention; the scent of prairie grass and the clomping of heavy boots fell beside him. _Hmm, it's Wolfesbane._

Intuition didn't fail as he heard, "Ry!"

Wolfe good-naturedly slapped a hand to his shoulder, "How about you show me to do that blind-folded arrow trick?"

"Please _don't_," Zero laughed, "can you _imagine_ the calamity of blinding Wolfe and letting him shoot? Stars we'd all be dead."

As Wolfe turned around to loudly give Zero a piece of his mind, the Shinobi head still couldn't shake the lingering, unsettling feeling that made him tense. There was just _something_ about the Aqualandian prince that felt nefarious...

* * *

><p>As deep blues and rich violets leaked into the night sky, I sat in my guestroom, behind my vanity as Wendy placed the final touches on my makeup. Her tongue lolled out as she carefully traced the rim of my lips with a rich red lipstick.<p>

Someone must have clued Bowser into my growing friendship with Parry and Auntie Lina as they had both been specially requested to make me up for my night with Bowser. They were in the palace, drooling over the King's luxurious accommodations. Parry had done my hair, Auntie Lina brought over a beautiful dress as Wendy worked on cosmetics.

"_Annnnnd_ there~!" Wendy pulled away with a smile, "Like, what do you two think?"

"Stunning. Stunn-_ing_!" Parry chirped happily, "Miss Daisy you truly are a vision of beauty."

I wore a crimson evening dress that gradually faded into a deep black at the hemline. Darklandian dresses were crafted to flatter the natural curves of a woman's body and this one did that nicely. I was meant to stun with matching cherry-lipstick, and smoky dark eyes Wendy had applied masterfully; I looked like a seductress.

I studied my appearance self-consciously; I looked like a _girl._ Wendy smiled, nodding her approval, "_OmiStars, y_ou look _amazing_! Tongues will wag and men will like drool. Enjoy your night with King Daddy!"

"_Joli!_ _vous êtes si jolie! _You are so pretty _mon chou_!" Auntie Lina glowed, clapping her hands together with mirthful glee.

Parry gasped, "Maybe we should send the princess with bodyguards! She is so beautiful and the great King may be..._tempted...!_"

Wendy and Auntie Lina gasped dramatically, though they were both smiling "Tempted!?"

I blushed, crossing my arms over my chest with a huff, "_Parry_! Don't be silly. He's _not_ going to _try _anything!"

"Oooh, but what if he _does_...?" Parry whispered with a conspiratorial grin, "What if he is quite taken by you?! And finds himself feeling amorous!? What if he drops to his knees and sweet talks you under the moonlight...?"

Parry lurched forward and wrapped his arms around me in a hug, "And what if he wishes to hold you in his arms and never lets you go!?"

"Parry!" I laughed.

I realized the three of them had cornered me in, wicked smiles across the half circle of meddling friends.

"And what if he wants _un bisous_? A kiss?" Auntie Lina joined in, tickling me.

I exploded into peals of laughter, cheeks glowing red, "H-Hey! Quit it! I _hate _being tickled!"

"And like, what if King Daddy wants to like, whisper sweet nothings in your ear?" Wendy growled with a wicked grin, her manicured claws tickling my sides.

"G-Guys stop!" I laughed, "I-I can't breathe!"

As I quailed with laughter, being tickle-attacked by my friends, there was a loud wrap on the door. Kammy cleared her throat, "Princess Daisy are you ready?"

"Uh...yeah...I'm done," I breathed.

"Splendid, His Greatness awaits your presence. I shall tell him to expect you shortly."

They piled off of me, grinning like mad.

"Have fun tonight, Sweetheart," Parry hugged me.

"I will."

"Like, have fun!" Wendy cooed.

"Ooh! King Bowser will be pleased! You are a vision!" Auntie Lina laughed, "_Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir?"*_

I squinted at Auntie Lina before turning and exiting; I don't know _what_ she said but I know it had something to do with Bowser and being naughty. I exited the elevator and peered at the stairwell. There Bowser waited, midnight-black shell polished and aglow like liquid obsidian. He wore sleek silver cufflinks; gone were the spikes; ooh! Someone dolled up for me!

Bowser turned around and our eyes met. He was usually so easy to read, quick to say what was on his mind but at this moment he was stone. Finally there was a crooked smirk and a shot of heat roiled in my stomach like magma. His eyes swept over my frame before we locked stares again.

He grinned, "_Gorgeous_. Shall we be on our way Princess Sarasaland?"

"But of course King Bowser."

And the second we were out of hearing range, the illusions of informality and political etiquette vanished like a boo touched by the raze of sunlight. Bowser grinned sharply, red eyes flickering in a quick once over, "Flower, holy Stars do you look amazing. Like damn."

I smiled, the warmth of blush heating my face, "Well you look nice too. Your shell has no spikes and no leather collars? Who _is_ this enchanting Koopa?"

He laughed richly, shooting a wild grin my way, "We're gonna have one helluva great night, _Purga_."

_Purga. _There goes that word again. Maybe I should ask Kamek or Kammy what it means...

* * *

><p>The clown copter pulled into descent, landing before a building with high profile clientele. Koopas and Koopettes alike were dressed in luxurious shells and glittering gowns, scrolling towards the building with a haughty air only wealth could provide.<p>

Most disembarked their rides, leaving the valet service to park their expensive vehicles. My stomach churned with nerves as I saw a fleet of paparazzi snapping pictures in annoying bolts of flashes and flooding around the restaurant's patrons. The clown car came to a smooth halt and with habitual ease Bowser hopped out and walked to my side.

He beat the valet to my door and popped it open, "Milady..."

I laughed and fluidly fell into a curtsy, "Thank you my Lord."

He helped me to the floor, aware of my expensive gown and far too knowledgeable of my misadventures in heels. He made sure I had my balance before acquiescing his light hold. He thoughtlessly tossed his keys to the nearby valet and told him, "Don't ruin the sick paintjob, Slick."

Bowser's appearance set the paparazzi into a vicious, blood-thirsty frenzy and within seconds they were crowding around, snapping thousands of bright lights and yelling obnoxious questions. It was so loud I couldn't understand anyone; it was a raucous cacophony of unintelligible screams and shouts.

Bowser held me close as we braved the wild swarm. It wasn't too soon when we approached the restaurant door. A Koopa valet in a sleek black shell bowed before pulling the glass door open, "Welcome King Bowser and Lady Sarasaland to the Le BowZer five star restaurant. Resurrected to celebrate King Bowser's jubilee."

I shot a glare at Bowser, "You have a restaurant named after you?!"

He laughed, raising his hands defensively, "Don't give me that look! I didn't _ask_ people to name something after me. And by the way there are twelve restaurants named after yours truly."

I rolled my eyes as he laughed softly. We entered the Le BowZer which was nothing but opulence and posh décor; beautiful crystal chandeliers sparkling in a kaleidoscope of rainbow colors, plush ebony velvet carpeting and a sophisticated cream-and-black color scheme sparked the final glimmer of elegance.

Being the _illustrious _king, Bowser always had a special table reserved for him and him alone. This came in handy as we were immediately seated. The restaurant manager and head chef came by the table to personally greet him and shake his hand. As they left, I chuckled, "Sometimes I forget you're a powerful, ruling king and not just my friend."

"Time and time again, I've told you how I'm a studmuffin," Bowser grinned, "you're just finally getting it now."

The waiter appeared, "May I take your order?"

"Hell ye—_ahem_, sure. I'd like twelve plates of the Firelandian seared steak and a bottle of your finest wine."

"Ah! The Dom Parakoopa Pérignon is exquisite sire! It's smooth, silky texture is absolutely divine. And for you my lady?"

"I'll take the succulent shrimp scampi please," I looked up from the menu and beamed, "And I'll have the sparkling green apple cider."

The waiter bowed before scuttling off. Bowser reclined comfortably, "So what do you think of the digs? Pretty snazzy huh?"

This place overflowed with elegance and was saturated with prestige and wealth. Dom Parakoopa Pérignon, though absolutely delicious, was a whopping _eighty grand_ per bottle and the prices on the menu made my eyes pop.

I've double-dated with Lulu, Mario and Peach at regular eateries enough to know reasonable pricing. I don't know how much Bowser was planning on shelling out tonight but it was _uncomfortable. _Though the restaurant was beautiful and spoke of flourishing extravagance ...

It was completely _un_-Bowserly.

"It's nice..." I answered slowly.

He bobbed his head, tapping his fingers against the table in a tuneless cadence. When he took me to see Ludwig's concert, that seemed completely out of his character but this...felt _unnatural_. Every now and then he would tug at the collar of his expensive shell I'd bet money he'd never worn more than _twice_.

And as far as I knew, he hated ritzy upscale events and the façade of perfectionism and wealth that came attached. Bowser was a straight forward Koopa; what you saw was what you get; he was blunt, selfish, vain and let you know exactly what he thought of you, political correctness be damned.

_This_ Bowser sitting before me was almost painfully too self-conscious. He was completely aware of my every move I made and seemed to adjust accordingly. A waiter stopped by with our beverages, gently rested them on our table before bowing and swiftly departing. I took a sip of my drink and cooed; green apple sparkling cider was the perfect combination of being sweet and tart. The price tag of ten grand per bottle made me burn with guilt.

Again Bowser's behavior struck me as odd; he only began to consume his drink once I started on my own beverage. And when he thought I was looking at him, he actually drank with his pinkie _raised._ _That _nearly made me choke.

The climax of the strange behavior came to a brilliant crash. Something I thought would never happened did; the awkward stretch of silence snuck up on our table and hit with all the force of a friggin' _typhoon._

_What the hell was going on here!?_ Bowser was a Koopa who_ never_ shut the hell up and yet here he was not saying a damn thing! His silence made me feel shy and I continued to sip my drink, looking anywhere but at him.

Every now and then Bowser traced the rim of his glass; it seemed like a nervous gesture, "You're...quiet tonight," he mused softly, "Is...Is everything to your liking?"

I blinked, meeting his diffident stare, "Huh? Oh yeah! Y-Yeah! Everything's fine! Ha...ha..."

No it wasn't and judging by his grimace he knew it wasn't either. He cleared his throat, opened his mouth to speak but then...

Awkwardly said _nothing_.

_Oh my Stars this was terrible_. What was going on?! He was nervous and acting completely weird which in turn was making _me_ feel self-conscious and timorous. Dinner was served and it looked absolutely delicious. I munched on my seafood and the second Bowser picked up a fork and a knife to eat _civilly_ I knew something was up. The Koopa inhaled food like a vacuum cleaner, why start with manners now?!

My irritated sigh grabbed his attention, "Bowser...What the hell?"

"Huh?" he blinked cluelessly, "What?"

"This," I gestured to his fork, "You're eating with a fork, taking me to a crazily expensive restaurant, you're...Well I honestly don't know what you're doing but it's completely out of character."

Whenever Bowser was called out on his actions, his response was to throw a raging, petulant tantrum. But instead he ground his jaw, like a Koopa who was actively trying to reign his anger.

"Well _maybe_ Flower I just want to impress you," he growled, "Maybe I don't want you to just see me as some kind of lowbrow idiot..."

"When have I _ever_ thought of you like that?" I asked with an honest raze of irritation.

"I want to show you that...I..." His face burned red, "your other suitors did things to prove themselves so why can't I?! I can be chivalrous and nice! A-And I can take you to nice places and t-treat you like a Darklandian queen!"

I froze, peering at him as he bored into me with an intent glare. So he wanted to prove his mettle as a gentlekoopa, as someone who could provide life's luxuries.

"Bowser," I reached over the table and touched his palm. I was surprised at how quickly he began stroking my hand, "I already know you're a great gu—_er,_ Koopa."

A slow, curving smile appeared on his face, "So you don't think I'm a barbaric tool?"

I laughed, "Not most of the time anyways. Bowser I _like_ who you are! I like your humor, it's raw, wild and funny! And...And I like your bold personality, there's just something about you that's dangerously charismatic! And I like the way you look."

_I like the way you look. _Wow. Where did that come from? That was NOT supposed to come out of my mouth. I didn't miss the obvious surprise dawn on his face as he stared with unhidden stupor. If the silence was awkward-town before, it was now renovated to awkward-city.

"Does that mean y-you...you find me attractive?" He asked quietly, with unusual vulnerability.

There was no teasing grin or a mischievous smile wrought with glittering fangs. He was honestly asking if I was attracted to _him_. In my head, I flipped the hell out. But on the outside?

My face burned hotter than the surface of the sun, and when I'm nervous I not only ramble, but laugh like a fool, "Do I think...? _Wahaha_! What do I think...? _Ha_...I never thought...Huh? I don't..._Oh Stars..._"

He played with his food despondently, using his large silver fork to swirl buttery mashed potatoes into thick unappetizing clumps, "It's alright...You don't have to lie to make _me_ feel better..."

Why, I think I actually, genuinely hurt his feelings.

...

_Ohhhhh shit cupcakes.._.

Who knew? Who knew the massive, beefcakey, spike-clad tyrant had delicate, sensitive feelings I could thoughtlessly trounce on? His eyes were obscure as he stabbed thoughtlessly—and maybe even a teensy bit angrily—at his appetizing steak.

I swallowed, "Bowser...You look fine."

"Yeah?" He sighed dejectedly, not bothering to look at me, "_How_?"

I had him by a hair-thin, fragile thread that was precariously close to snapping each passing second I lingered.

"Your..." I looked him over, "Your eyes. They're this shade of red that reminds me of fire. And they're really beautiful."

His head shot up so fast, "Huh...?"

My face burned, "_I-I-I-I_ s-said your eyes remind me...of f-fire!"

As I swirled my beverage nervously, Bowser scrutinized me intensely.

"Y-Yeah, like fire..." I whispered, cheeks hot.

"_And...?_" he pressed.

"And your...biceps? What? Do you lift cars for a workout? You're friggin' _jacked_."

"..." He hesitated, peering up at me with all the ferociousness of a bad puppy, "Do you...y'know, like '_jacked' _guys?"

_Mmmmhmm._ Freakin' Stars _yes._

"Yeah, they're _okay._ Also your smile is infectious, and I mean your true smile and not the 'I'm gonna kill you' one."

"_And...?_" I realized he was slowly starting to smile.

"And your face is...uh..._symmetric_?" Lame, I know but if it puffed up his ego then I did my job.

"Heh," he chuckled faintly, "My _sexy_ jaw line is so damn rugged it'd cut stone."

I laughed, "See? Now can we _please_ move past this awkwardness!? I like us like this, laughing and silly. I mean you're wearing a bowtie! And I'm wearing a really overdone dress I couldn't care for."

"Alright fine." Though he rolled his eyes with feigned effort, he was finally smirking. Bowser untied his fancy-smancy tie and let it hang loosely. He kicked back, resting both elbows on the back of his chair, "I think you look stunning even if you do hate dresses."

"Thanks," I smiled, "By the way Bowser?"

"Yeah?" he was starting to viciously rip into a steak.

"There's something I never thought of..."

"What is it?" In three massive chomps he devoured the steak and was hungrily eying the next.

I peered at him, "How old are you?"

He choked and immediately had a fit of coughs. He pounded his fist against his torso until his expectoration stopped. Bowser was glowing red as his expression contorted, "What made you...think of _that_?"

I grinned, shrugging a single shoulder, "I've always been curious..."

He scratched his scalp with a grimace, "It's...a difficult question to answer."

Amused, my brows rose to my hairline, "What's so difficult about age?"

He scratched more vigorously at his head, eyes nearly squinted closed, "Look...This is another one of those things that would weird you out."

"_Bowser_..." I sighed exasperatedly.

"Ask something less personal," he groaned.

I took that as; _I need to stall until I come up with a good answer_. While he massaged his temples in soothing circles, I peered at the odd shimmer of his scales. I always thought it was strange how smooth and elegant they were; Koopas were beastly, primal creatures, they weren't supposed to have pretty scales. The subtle milky sheen and pastel color were reminiscent of a conch's creamy shell.

"Your scales," I slowly reached over the table and smoothed my thumb over his arm. The golden scales had a pearly gloss that glowed softly under the chandelier lighting, "...anything weird about them?"

I didn't think about it as I softly rubbed his bicep, admiring the smooth texture. A slow smile curved on his lips, and being the egomaniac he was, Bowser flexed, "Nothing really except molting."

I blinked, "You _shed_?!"

"Koopas _molt_ but yeah," he smirked, "Our scales molt during the warmer seasons and bulk up heavier in winter."

"When you she—molt, can I keep a scale?"

He laughed, "You want one!? Sure I guess. I'm surprised it's not _weirding _you out."

I shrugged, "Bowser lots of anim—uh beasts—erm, I mean..._lots_ of creatures molt. Piranha plants molt their petals and even Fire flowers. Firefly molted his petals last month and now he shines like a star."

"My scales do always hold a shine better after a seasonal molt," Bowser mused, scratching his chin.

I cleared my throat, "_Soooo..._you gonna tell me your age now?"

As he slapped his face into his palm, I tittered with laughter, "Oh Stars...L-Look it's _weird_ to explain Flower..."

"Weirder than molting pretty scales?" I smiled puckishly.

"My scales are _not_ pretty. They _protect _my hide," he growled, "and yes it's '_weirder_'."

"Bowser, I'm pretty sure humans do things you'd consider weird too."

He squinted his eyes, "What is the point of wearing gloves? Now _that's _weird."

"Heat, protection...There's plenty of reasons," I smiled.

"You wear gloves for heat? If you were cold I could have warmed you—"

"Princesses wear gloves for _modesty_."

Bowser guffawed, "Are you kiddin' me!? Modesty!? What? Do human guys get _hot _seeing your pretty little fingers!? Would Greenstache and Wolfe get a little _'hot unda tha colla_' if you '_flashed' _them!?"

I glowered, "Your age. _Now._"

That killed his mirth ruthlessly. He sighed, "Look...Koopas and humans age differently..."

"Okay...? So how old are you?" I giggled immaturely, "Am I having dinner with a _grandpa Koopa_?"

"_No! I'm not a grandpa!_" He roared viciously, slamming his fists against the table. I swear his eyes glowed completely red.

"_Whooooa_!" I grinned, "I didn't think I touched so deep a nerve..."

"If I tell you," he was speaking through his teeth, "Will you just _accept_ things?!"

"Sure..."

"Koopas age differently than humans, like I said before," his voice grew soft, "We have a longer life longevity..."

I peered at him curiously, "Bowser how old _are_ you?"

"_And_," he harrumphed, cutting a sharp look at me, "if I was to compare my age in human years, it would...sound _better._ It wouldn't seem like..." He swallowed thickly, averting his gaze, "...like I'm some old coot tryin' to perv out on a young girl..."

_Old coot? Did he really refer to himself as an 'old coot!?'_

And then?

And then I laughed my _ass off_, that's what. I know it was a vulnerable moment for him but really? Did he have to say _old coot!_? He clearly did not look anything even near old. He was strong, tall and probably at the prime of his strength.

Tears rimmed my eyes as my lungs burned from the exertion of my obnoxious laughter. My amusement triggered Bowser's ire; he ground his jaw, face blazing red as he shook with the flame of fury and palpable embarrassment.

"_F-Fine!_ _Just k-keep on laughin'_!" He roared, turning more than a few heads in the establishment, "I'm not gonna tell you anything anymore!"

"Okay! _Okay_!" I breathed, trying to settle my hysterics, "I swear I won't laugh _again_..."

He glared, arms locked into a staid cross, "I'm not telling you _anything_ since you think it's so damn funny."

"Please?" I grinned.

"No..." He sounded far less upset.

So I entreated again, "_Pleeeeease_?"

His eyes flickered, "Well, maybe if you beg again...in Sarasalandian..."

"_Per favorre mi Golgo_?"

A grin stretched across his face, "Maybe I can forgive you just this _once..._"

I chuckled, "I'll never understand why you love hearing me speak Sarasalandian..."

"Truthfully?" a devilish grin curved on his lips, "Your voice takes on this airy, soft lilt. It's _really_ _sexy_."

My jaw dropped as he smirked puckishly. Before I could reply, he started up again, "So as I was saying. We age differently. Once physical maturation is achieved, we won't look older...Until extreme old age."

"So the Firelands elders—?"

Bowser laughed, "—Are ancient, moldy scale sacks. They've probably been around before your great, great grandfathers."

I tried to do a rough estimate; each generation give or take was twenty years. Grammy was born in the thirties, her father was born maybe at the turn of the century and his father at the end of the century. You're telling me these Koopas been around since the 19th century?!

I peered at Bowser, "Okay so I can't ask how old you are, but do you know what your age would be, or the human equivalent in years?"

Bowser paused, before a slow smile crawled across his face," In human years I'd be around your age."

I blinked, "Twenty three? Twenty four?"

"Twenty eight, give or take a year," He smirked, carefully judging my reaction.

He was older? Well I guess that makes sense. But now I really do want to know his true age. He said Koopas age slower and have a longer life span. Does one Koopa year equal several human years?

"So that didn't...bother you?" He asked unsurely.

"We're different species," I spoke with no infection, "Why would humans and Koopas age the same? One human year is nine for Blitties and seven for dogs..."

I smiled, "Bowser, nothing about you can run me off. Got it? I've accepted you for who you are."

He half grinned, "Well, if you really mean that..."

"I do," I patted his hand, "Now if you excuse me, I'll be back in a sec. I'm going to 'powder my nose' or whatever girls say when they gotta tinkle."

Bowser blinked before laughing and shaking his head.

* * *

><p>I looked in the mirror, palms covered in a froth of soapy bubbles as I hummed tunelessly. I froze the moment a Koopette entered the ladies' room. Our eyes locked. The bewitching coalescence of beauty and poise made me think of a queen or an empress.<p>

She was dressed in a beautiful fuchsia evening gown, provocatively sheer to give the illusion of being see-through. Her midnight-blue tresses were besprinkled with twinkling precious jewels. Her beautiful crystalline eyes glowed, slanted in a beguiling, feline quality. Where my charm was childish and innocent, her beauty was mature and dripping with sex.

She was one of those Koopettes blessed with striking beauty, the kind of elegance and winsomeness that knocked the wind out of your being. Even the most confident of women took a fatal blow to their confidence when she was near.

This was the divine ex-queen of the Darklands, she was tall, curvaceous in all the right places and positively sensual. When she and Bowser split, he _had _to wonder if he'd ever find a more beautiful, alluring creature.

"I was hoping I could speak to you for a moment," the voice of a siren.

I turned to face her. Any time a woman wanted to meet with another in a bathroom, my experience taught me violence or at least the exchange of rather nasty words was to ensue.

"What are you doing here?" I pondered aloud.

Clawdia chuckled smoothly, resting her hands on her voluptuous hips, "I am celebrating my dear sister's birthday. This happens to be her favorite restaurant."

"Which is coincidentally named after your ex-husband?" I asked innocently.

Oh? What was that? Did I _really _just go there!? _Hell yeah_ I did. Clawdia laughed without true humor, "It's quite hard to eschew King Bowser's affluence in the Darklands don't you think?"

I crossed my arms over my chest and spoke in my most astringent voice, "Well you have my attention. What do you want to speak about Clawdia?"

I got the vibe that Clawdia—though vainglorious and superficial—had a keen, calculative mind. Any woman who was able to inspire the darkest depths of Bowser's hatred had to be twice as malicious as he.

"You've been spending a lot of time with his highness," Clawdia titled her head as the gems in her cerulean tresses glinted in a sprinkle of rainbow brilliance, "I suppose you mean a great deal to him."

"Not to be blunt but what's your point?" I deadpanned.

"My point _is: _if your relationship progresses, then the blood feud between Bowser and I will become an issue pertaining to you as well."

I fell silent, unsure of how to reply. She arched an alluring eyebrow, "Surely you've thought of this? While Bowser may hail you as his new queen, I am still their _mother_."

I arched an eyebrow; _hailed as his new queen? Whoa, Koopette. Bowser does NOT see me as his new queen!_

"I can't and—_won't_—speculate on a relationship that isn't my own," I replied.

A quirk of rose-red lips, "Interesting…"

"However, the Koopalings claim they don't even know you," I frowned, "How can you boast being their mother when they haven't seen you in years? Junior's never seen your face. To his knowledge you don't exist."

Clawdia's eyes averted, "You don't seem to understand how_...difficult_ Bowser is to deal with. I'm afraid he brings out the worst in me."

"Actually I do," I laughed, "He's pigheaded, egocentric and insufferable."

Her head snapped in my direction, a skeptical eyebrow arched, "And yet you still stay on his arm and warm his sheets at night? _Hmph_. And here I thought you were _somewhat_ respectable."

_Was...Was she implying I'm a skank!?Excuse me, but she's the one here wearing a sheer dress that would make everyone think we could see through her dress! And I'M the skank!?_

I slammed my hand against the counter in a resounding _bang_, "I'm _not _sleeping with him, nor am I _that _kind of girl!" I growled in the back of my throat, "Bowser is flawed but his good qualities far outweigh his shortcomings. He's sweet, doting and one of the most generous men—Koopas I've ever met. His chivalry puts most human males to _shame_. He's generous and only hopes for my friendship."

Clawdia laughed dryly, "What type of fool do you take me for? You honestly expect me to believe that? The day I left, my ex-husband worked his way through an entire slew of royal women." She snorted with elegant derision, "_Harlots_ more like it. His…_exploits _are heralded around this kingdom like an achievement. It's quite disgusting really."

I chewed the inside of my cheek; who didn't know about that? After their vicious, public divorce, Bowser worked his way through the Darkland's A-list of affluent models and actresses with a legendary tenacity you either admired or abhorred.

I scoffed, "He hasn't slept with _me _because I'm _not _a skank. I've also heard you were unfaithful in your marriage."

Clawdia laughed, "Old news but yes I was a bit…_playful_. Not that it's any of your concern."

"I'm just saying sister, don't throw bricks if you live in a glass house."

She grinned, "Odd proverb but very fitting I suppose. And since you're _charitable_ enough to offer advice then so shall I. If you have a semi-decent brain—which I _suspect_ as true—you'd realize you're nothing but the next conquest princess, another notch in his belt, another good story he can tell his buddies about. It escapes me if he's bedded a human girl yet. Some enfeebled blonde in pink maybe."

_And now she was talking about my cousin, who was one of the most virtuous, ladylike women in the universe._

"Peach? _No_. You make _a lot_ of untrue claims. I'm not disregarding what you say but that doesn't apply to me. I honestly think he views us differently. He treats me with respect almost borderline worship to be honest…"

At my blunt speech, Clawdia was noticeably affronted as her entire form went rigid and I realized my mistake, "Uh…sorry, I didn't mean how that came out. I really meant…"

She laughed, "Perhaps you didn't mean how it sounded but the truth is still blaringly obvious. I was employed as a breeding mare and you are worthy of being his queen."

I bit my lip as she fell silent, eyes blank. I looked at her, "I don't know why I'm telling you this…but I don't think you're the evil ex-wife everyone seems to portray you as."

Clawdia blinked, surprise glowing on her pretty face, "Bowser is a great guy and maybe you weren't gifted with the opportunity to see him in that light in your marriage. I understand that, but the Bowser of today is..._amazing._"

"Perhaps. Maybe time has changed him into a better Koopa and I must admit, you're not quite as pathetic as I had hoped," a smirk smoothed across her face, "You've got a spine. It's always easier to hate an empty-headed, clingy woman. Unfortunately you seem to have your head screwed on straight."

I laughed, "Uh thanks?"

"I can see why he likes you," Clawdia's eyes scrolled over my frame studiously, without the steel edge of criticism, "Perhaps in some alternate universe where my ex wasn't chasing you down like a Chow in heat, we would have been friends."

I smirked and crossed my arms, "Well right back at you. Perhaps in some alternate universe where you cared for your children, we would have been friends."

She chuckled, "No, if I did I'd still be married to Bowser. I could try to kill him every night but as long as I was willing to love his children, he'd put up with a wrecked marriage."

"You took advantage of him," My eyes tightened.

"I suppose I did," she said airily, checking her reflection in the mirror, then her jewel-blue eyes shifted in my direction, "Just remember one thing Princess. In a fight, if the woman is worth her salt, she _always _wins in the end."

I blinked, "…I don't think I understand…?"

A slow, obscure smile curved on her maroon lips, "There's a reason why Bowser Junior is the heir to the throne and it's not just because he's the king's favorite child. Delve deeper into that issue and you will learn very fast how the woman always wins. My children are mine, yes but are they all _his._..? Hmph, who knows?"

She turned and slinked towards the exit with an alluring sashay of her hips. Then she halted in the middle of her stride, as if something came to mind suddenly, "By the way princess…from one girl to another; when a man offers a woman everything the world has; he wants far _more_ than your friendship. Marinade on that thought a bit."

The door shut behind her gently as the last wafts of her rose perfume disappeared. _What did that all mean? Offering the world? Is she suggesting that Bowser has ulterior motives? And what about Bowser Junior on the throne? Why not Ludwig? He's the oldest…_

* * *

><p>My plate had been scraped clean and Bowser happily picked his fangs with a toothpick the size of a fork. When we stepped out front, the valet had the clown copter awaiting us. The angry rankle of paparazzi had disappeared entirely and for now it was just us alone.<p>

Bowser opened my door, bowed and spoke with a silly voice, "In we go milady~!"

I laughed, "Stars! Is there a time when you're never a—_oh_!"

I stumbled over my non-existent heels and nearly face-planted. Bowser smoothly swept me into his arms, almost as if he anticipated my klutzy move. He bellowed with laughter as I peered up at him, cheeks dark red, "Heh,_whoops_..."

"Always gonna be a clumsy little fool huh?" He breathed softly.

I peered up at him with an annoying veil of bangs shading my left eye. Before I could flick my red fringe out of my face, Bowser spoke in a thick purr, "Leave it."

"Huh?"

"You...look _real _pretty like that," he whispered in a growl.

I swallowed thickly and probably nosily too. The friendly, chummy atmosphere had silkily warmed up into smoldering stares and boiling temperatures. He was staring intensely and his eyes kept flickering indecisively between my mouth and eyes.

"_Flower..._" He breathed. His thick claws gently grasped my shoulder, softly kneading my skin before lifting to my clavicle and continuing with an unhurriedly ease to my neck. I shivered under the feathery ghost of his touch, temperature blazing.

His eyes were halfway closed as he spoke in a deep whisper, "I'm going to kiss you...and _not_ in that friendly, platonic way either. It's going to be a _real_ kiss."

My face burned with heat, eyes doubling in size as I studied his fervid expression. It was tender yet his eyes were ablaze with the terrific meld of overlapping reds and oranges of fire; his passion made his irises seem like they glowed ethereally. Stars, he's _never_ looked at me like that...

The weight of such a burning stare made me nervous and happy and uncomfortable at the same time. Here I just tripped stupidly over my own two feet and yet he could still give such a look filled with heat and fire and...

And...

He placed a large hand on the small of my back and delicately swept me flush against his ribbed plastron. My head was still spinning, heart throbbing as he bent over and sweetly brushed his lips against mine.

A rush of warmth exploded from my core and blazed deliciously up my spine. His rumbling purrs of pleasure tickled as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss. He gently released his hold as I stepped back, face hot, eyes round and heart jack hammering.

"_Please_ tell me I wasn't the only one who felt that electricity..." Bowser whispered.

"You...You weren't the only one..." I whispered, biting my lip.

Instead of a sly, self-indulgent grin, his expression softened, "Well, since this _is_ a celebration of my culture," Bowser whispered, "Wanna...try a Koopa hug?"

I swallowed thickly; I wasn't _quite _sure if I could handle a second passionate kiss like that again, a hug sounded safe and far less troubling; I wasn't _supposed _to want to kiss my best friend _again. _And I wasn't _supposed _to want my best friend to stare at me with toe-curling warmth, "Sure? What do you do?"

He laughed, leaning down and touched his forehead against mine. He purred, gently nosing and nuzzling his snout against my nose. I laughed as a smile grew across his maw, "That's a Koopa hug? I think it's cute."

Then a flicker of mischief blazed in his eyes and the next thing I knew, he licked the side of my face, even grazing my hairline. He bellowed with laughter as I spluttered, blush burning hotly against my skin. I squawked loudly, "What the hell!? W-What was _that_ for?!"

"Koopa kiss," he smirked, "Now come on we got dessert waiting at home. I ordered chocolate cake from that one place you like."

I laughed at the vague statement, "'That one place you like' wow, I totally know _exactly_ what you're talking about."

"You know, it's that cutesy dessert shop that cute lil' Koopette owns. The one I've been trying to hook up with one of my knuckleheaded sons."

Realization hit me, "Koopie! You ordered a cake from Koopie's Sweeties?! That means it's going to be amazing! Then let's hurry up! I want some delicious cake!"

With a deep chuckle, Bowser gently picked me up and helped me into the car. When I tried to take my seat, Bowser held onto my palm and I shot a questioning glance his way. He grinned crookedly and kissed my hand. I laughed aloud when he blew a raspberry against my arm.

"Bowser you're so _stupid!_"I laughed, "Whatever you do...don't ever change."

His expression softened as he squeezed my hand, "I won't if you won't _Purga_."

"What does that word mean—?"

"_Well!_ In the clown copter I go!"

He hopped into the pilot's seat and fired up the engine. The roar of propellers blazed to life in a thunderous, animalistic growl and standing at the main entrance of the Le BowZer was Clawdia Koopa of all people. We took to the sky and even as we left, her stare was boring intently into the copter.

Her stunned expression told me she had seen the whole scene.

* * *

><p>"Bowser! No...I can't!"<p>

"Sweets for the sweet," he laughed, "Come _ooooon_, just one little nibble?"

One last tantalizing slice of chocolate cream cake remained, teasing with its moist double-tier cake and thick, buttery frosting glace. Bowser was on a mission to feed me the final slice. We ate dessert in his room, partially because it was late and we could be as loud as we liked but most importantly Bowser didn't want his '_precious_ _children_' to ruin our 'alone time.'

He edged the cake near my face as I laughed, shaking my head, "_Ugh_, Bowser I can't eat anymore!"

"Just one last bite?" he smirked.

I grinned, "How about I feed it to _you?"_

A wild grin stretched across his face, "Lemme think about that: a desert babe feeding me delicious cake...? I'm going to have to give that one a roaring hell yeah."

I took the cake and watched the way his eyes glowed happily. He even bent forward, licking his lips. Just when his face was inches from mine...I slapped the cake against his mouth, messily smearing frosting all over his mouth and the tips of my fingers.

"Eat..._that_!" I roared, half-way laughing.

I squealed with laughter, taking in his unguarded stupor before taking off and racing to get away. I didn't need a psychic or Lazinne's fortunetelling to know he would be coming after me. There was loud clamor and then he was chasing me.

I shrieked buoyantly, laughing largely as a gigantic hand missed me by inches. I raced from his room and slammed the door shut. I screamed, laughing wildly when Bowser barreled through the door like a gigantic linebacker. He looked around furiously until I fell into his sight. An insane grin crossed his face as he scrubbed the last of the chocolate off his face.

"Oh, when I get my hands on _you_, you _little troublemaker_..."

And the chase resumed.

"Here comes the _biiiig baaaaad Koopa_!" he roared menacingly.

I should have taken into account that I was attired in a beautiful full-length evening gown that cost thousands of coins, but that was the last thing I considered. No fancy dress was going to stop me from putting down tracks. I kicked off my heels and began to run bare-foot.

The dress was too tight and as I continued to sprint, the snug fabric of my beautiful evening gown ripped up my left ribs. I laughed, slamming another stone door shut as Bowser plowed through seconds later with resolute determination and a predatory glow in his eyes. He surprised me by spin-dashing, making up lost ground.

As I darted around a corner, his meaty hand caught my waist and halted my escape. I squealed, laughing as he cornered me in. We both panted, large grins on our faces as our hearts thumped wildly. We peered into each other's eyes.

"_Gotcha_," Bowser growled darkly; a wicked smile lifted half of his mouth higher in a dangerous lopsided grin.

I half-laughed; my hair had frizzed up and was probably wild, messy and everywhere in a crazy tangle of crimson curls. Bowser's eyes still blazed wildly from the thrill of chase as he panted.

He chuckled, "_Tsk_, look at this, you ripped your dress you tomboyish girl. Never did care about how you look, even if you're painfully stunning."

I peered at my side and indeed there was an awkward rip along the expanse of my left rib. My cheeks flushed and immediately I tried to cover it but Bowser gently nudged my fingers away. He ran a single claw along the breadth of exposed bronze skin, exciting a tingling sensation. We locked stares and I gulped thickly at the unexpectedly melting expression.

We locked eyes as a smoky concentration of hope, admiration and warmth swirled in his crimson eyes like fog. He spoke in a deep whisper, "Can I...kiss you?"

My cheeks flushed as I nodded my head, "Okay..."

"Tilt your head to the left, Baby doll," he whispered.

"L-Like this?" I replied back just as softly, blush burning hotter.

He nodded. Bowser drew forward slowly, almost as if unsure. He softly touched my face, gently running a large thumb over my cheek. It was with a painstaking sweetness that our lips touched. It felt like my heart stopped, a smoldering burn of liquid fire spread intravenously, flooding my entire body with wondrous honey and melting chocolate.

He kissed me, capturing my breath and stealing my senses. My mind blanked, and strangely I didn't want to stop. My eyes snapped open when he suddenly froze, "Bow...ser?"

I drew away, completely flustered, as I peered into the inky, purple irises of my best friend. Wait,_ purple?_ Bowser panted, brows furrowed with strain as beads of sweat glittered on his temple. It was strange, but he felt hot, like a burning furnace, exuding so much heat.

Those eerily dark, nearly violet eyes flickered with conflict. He suddenly let go and backed away, even stumbling over himself and knocking over a towering statue. He grimaced, as thousands of emotions flashed in his dark amethyst eyes wildly.

"Bow...ser?" I tried to reach for him.

But he staggered away from me, still clutching his jaw as if he had a smarting toothache. He hit a gong in the hallway and immediately a dry bone's servant appeared, "Your Evilness?"

"S-See t-the princess to her chambers," Bowser grunted with audible strain. He turned, hastily disappearing into his room, staggering through the broken door with resolution.

"Bowser..." I whispered, concern fluttering in my stomach; what was...was everything _okay_? He had been sweltering _hot._

The Dry bones padded to my side, "Come along princess Sarasaland, it is quite late."

I followed after the servant, peering after where Bowser had been seconds prior. My head was spinning as gobs of conflicting emotions and thoughts battled for dominion. I had just thoughtlessly kissed my best friend. And it had been...

_Fun._

I walked back to my room, the glow of the silver doors soft against the candle lights. I was busy trying to make sense of everything that had just happened as I paused, realizing Taurus was hovering by my silver doors. He held a paper in hand.

"Prince Taurus?" I whispered uncertainly; my lasers were set on stun and with the wrong move they'd be on _kill._

He froze, before smoothly turning around, "Oh...Princess Sarasaland..."

I squinted at him unsurely, "What...are you doing here?"

Taurus slipped closer and with each step he took closer, gooseflesh broke out on my arms and the warning sirens went off in my head; there was just something about him that made me feel uneasy. Maybe it was the easy, arrogant saunter or how there was something serpentine and cold about his silvery eyes. Maybe it was because of his overt narcissism, I mean I friggin' get it; you're cute, big _whoop_.

Taurus was an attractive guy with very little dispute. Ryu was just as attractive, almost as if the inverse to his fair features; where the Aqualandian prince was fair with glittering silver eyes, a smooth apricot complexion and wheat-golden hair, Ryu was tan, sun-kissed with wild ebony locks and the darkest, deepest blue eyes I'd seen. Only Ryu wasn't stuck on himself nor did he turn up his nose at everyone else.

Taurus stopped when he was several feet away and under the candlelight his irises seemed white, "I asked a servant to find your quarters, I hope that didn't seem invasive at all..."

"Depends on the reason you wanted to know where I stay," I replied.

He chuckled softly, running a hand through perfectly tussled locks, "Well...I hoped to have been gone before your return but, here. Look at it if you will..."

I took the slip of paper, using extra care to avoid touching his hand. I unfolded the slip and stared. Not only did I stare but I gaped and flashed a quick dubious look at Taurus who smiled crookedly.

_It was...a love poem...Just like the first one..._

My hands shook, trembling as I stared at the note with disbelief; i-it couldn't have been him...But...he's the only one...

"Y-You...?" I croaked weakly, "Y-You were the one who wrote the love notes...?"

"I don't express myself well under pressure," he laughed softly, "But I thought you would like it."

"I..." I swallowed thickly, "Thank you..."

His expression lightened as he laughed jovially, "What is this? Finally being kind to me are you? And here I thought I liked it better when I saw the rose's thorns. So this is what it's like to have the princess's favor. Your warm smile is absolutely breathtaking."

I smirked, "Don't get used to it. I'm _not _going to suddenly become your best friend but I guess I'll...try to be cordial."

"That's a pretty good start," Taurus took my hand, planted a soft kiss against my knuckles and for once I didn't pull away, "Sweet dream Princess."

"Uh Prince Taurus?"

He turned and looked at me over his shoulder. I smiled, "Please, call me...Daisy."

His expression lightened, "Alright then. Good night _Daisy_."

I entered my bedroom, staring vacuously at the love note. Why didn't this make me feel happy? I finally found out who had been writing my poems but...this didn't make me feel elated like I thought. I rummaged through my suitcase and picked up the first love letter and compared the two; the handwriting was completely different...As if written by two different people, but then again Taurus did seem like he was in a hurry...But...

I sighed deeply. This whole day was overwhelming and now on top of all the new feelings and misunderstandings between Bowser and I; this is the cherry on top of the WTF sundae._ Taurus had wrote the love notes. The conceited, arrogant prince. Maybe he wasn't...so bad..._

* * *

><p>There was obnoxious pounding against Kamelia Koopa's door at an <em>ungodly<em> hour. She nearly jumped out of her skin in panic. She squinted angrily, wondering who could be so rude as to disturb her so late. She felt around her dresser blindly and once found, she carefully put on her spectacles and read it was an alarming three-seventeen am.

With a slight growl, she grabbed her wand and spoke, "Who _is_ it?"

"Hag, it's me."

No one else's voice had the growling bass like the king. Kammy hopped out of bed and almost stumbled over the hem of her nightgown in her haste. With a flick of her wrist the doors to her bedchambers rolled open.

Bowser, who had been pacing, entered immediately.

"My lord what's the—?"

She saw the deep violet eyes and could easily scent the pheromones of her king's arousal.

"Kammy," he whispered, violet eyes probing, "I...I _need_ you...If...If you could..."

Kammy's heart nearly stopped its palpations; _w-what is he asking me to do!?_

She dropped her scepter as her glasses nearly slipped off her face. "_L-Lord Bowser_!?" She gasped, "I-I've raised you from _childhood_! I gave my word to serve my king as best as I can but a 'late night tryst'?! I simply cannot, and will not—"

Bowser's eyes _instantly_ flew open as he whispered, "_Wait_..._You_ thought I came here wanting some..._late night nookie!?_"

There was silence and then...

"_OH MY FRIGGIN' STARS KOOPETTE!_"

Bowser nearly choked in disgust as he backed away, arms flailing, and his face even tinged blue, "_O-OH MY STARS KAMELIA_! _W-WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK THAT!?_"

"W-What am I _supposed_ to think!?" she wheezed, face blooming with color, "Y-You...!"

A roil of putrid disgust nearly destroyed every ounce of raging desire he had. And _against_ his better judgment, he gave his advisor a skeptical once-over. Kammy—whose hair was held in a grandmotherly bonnet—was garbed in the most _matronly_, _unflattering_ nightgown with an ugly puke-green floral print.

Bowser scrunched his face in a mixture of disgust and curiosity. _And she thought I'd try to creep into her chambers at midnight and wanna smash that?!_

...

Bowser roared with thundering laughter, to the point tears pricked his eyes as he clutched his stomach. He looked at Kammy again and guffawed with renewed vigor. Kammy's cheeks grew red with shame as her king howled at the absurdity of such an idea.

Don't get him wrong, it wasn't because of age; there had been _several_ older women Bowser found attractive—Clawdia's mother was _smokin',_ Dog-boy's mom was pretty sexy in a wild cavewoman kind of way and in some twisted, demented part of his mind he thought Flower's mom had first-class tickets to the MILF train. _Props to Emp. Sakuro for gettin' summa that._

And though the nightgown and rollers didn't help, he could _totally_ get it on with Flower if she had rollers in her hair. Hell, he actually kind of found it kinky in an erotic kind of way.

But with Kammy? _Kamelia Koopa?!_

Bowser doubled-over, clutching his stomach as he bellowed with laughter. He even grew short of breath from such vigorous laughter. Offended, Kammy threw on a shapeless robe and snapped, "What do you expect?! You came in here reeking of pheromones, dark lusting eyes and you show up at my door at three in the morning!?"

With one last spirited laugh, Bowser wiped the tears from his eyes, "_Ah_, that laugh did make me feel better. Anyways..."

He sighed deeply, "I think I screwed up with Flower..."

Kammy's anger liquidly shifted into concern, "Have a seat and I'll conjure up some tea."

With a flick of her wand, two steaming saucers appeared on the table. Bowser stared into the fragrant vapors hollowly as he nearly crushed one of Kammy's chairs under his great weight.

"So what happened sire?"

He sighed, resting his head in his palm, "Long story short, I kissed Flower and I don't know _what _it is about her, but she drive my senses _haywire_. I _totally _wanted to...heh _you know..._"

"You know? 'You know' _what_?" Kammy furrowed her brow ridges.

Bowser arched an eyebrow pointedly and Kammy quickly caught on. She nearly spat up her tea, "_W-W-What?!_ Oh my blinking Stars King Bowser! _What have you done_?! I've raised you to be a gentleKoopa! You didn't...?"

He grinned wryly, "'Go all the way'? No. But I wanted to. The annoying Koopa instincts kicked in and nearly drove me _insane._"

He lifted his gums and sure enough his front two incisors had elongated with his gums starting to bruise from the strain; the darkened irises and elongated incisors were all antecedent signals of Koopa mating. Kammy looked nervous, "So just to be sure...you _didn't_...?"

"Mate? No," he chuckled dryly. He nudged at the tiny tea cup despondently, "She's nowhere near ready for that. It's just hard to have restraint around a pretty girl. A _really _pretty, innocent girl. A really pretty innocent girl with_ loooong_ legs. A really pretty, innocent girl with long legs that I'd _looooove_ to—"

Kammy raised her hand immediately, "_PLEASE_ Lord Bowser. _No more_! I get it! You're _quite _attracted to Miss Sarasaland!"

Then Bowser buried his face in his hands, "Do you think I screwed things up? I probably freaked her the hell out—"

"King Bowser, I cannot say how Princess Sarasaland feels as I am not her," Kammy hummed, "But...Sire to be frank, she has seen you during the Koopa Moon, and after the Ninji abduction; if circumstances like _those_don't drive her away screaming, then I'm sure she wouldn't...be frightened from this."

Bowser muttered softly, "Yeah...I hope so..."

"Take a deep breath of fresh air and you'll feel better," Kammy smiled, "A goodnight's sleep will make you feel better, you and her both."

Bowser bowed his head before turning and slowly slipping back to his quarters. When he slid into bed for the night, he did nothing but stare at the ceiling, hoping, praying he hadn't scared Flower off.

_Dear Stars..._

_Hey, uh it's Bowser. I don't pray. AT ALL. Actually I do, but it's only for bad things. Last time I prayed, it was for Mario...to have a Chain Chomp bite...his...ass...Which I heard did actually happen! GWHAHAHAHAHAHA that's friggin' FUNNY—But, uh, I know you Starry deities frown on that shi—stuff, I mean STUFF. And I bet you Stars don't like cursing either, which I DO. Allllll the time._

_..._

_AHEM!_

_If anyone's out there listening, could you make Flower like me? Not, platonic like, but love-like me? I think she's the best woman out there and she's pretty, funny, smart and sexy. Waaaay sexy. I mean yowza, she's HOT. You see the legs on that girl!? And those boobs!? That is one __**hot **__little tomboy. She needs her own soundtrack when she walks into a room. Heh, I have this one dvd of her playing a Superstriker game against some loser, do you know how much I rewind and watch her run in slow motion!? Yeeeeah, it's awesome! Boingy! Boingy! Boingy!_

_Anyways...think you could make her notice me? My kids like her—except Roy who...well he has his own issues—but this is the first girl I actually LIKE. She's changing me. ME! I haven't torched the staff anymore, thrown chairs at people's heads, kidnapped Peach and I've been...nice...well as nice as I can be. I'm not NOT gonna stop trying to pound Mario's face in._

_...Sooooo, how do you end this thing? Bowser out? Roger? That means you Starry people can stop listening to my wish/prayer thingie now. BOWSER. OUT._

With a huff, Bowser turned over and threw the blankets over his head. Miles and galaxies above their word, little did Bowser know the twinkling, glowing Stars in Star haven had not only heard his prayer, but had recorded it for entertainment purposes. Somewhere in the cosmos, Geno sighed and shook his head as his colleagues laughed; it seems some people never change.

* * *

><p>Alice: The * if anyone saw it was a Lady Marmalade reference. Of course if you recognized it, then you know what Auntie Lina was saying about Daisy and Bowser. ;)<p>

Ultrra: O_O That jerk Taurus stole credit for Bowser's poetry! He needs a rock bottom! Or at the very least a Bowser punch for that infraction XD And something tells me King Bowwy felt some _bowchikabowow~_ for Daisy. XD

Alice: Hehe, Leave a review! ^_^


	26. Kingdom Tour: Aqualands

Ultrra:..

Alice:...What?

Ultrra: So, are you gonna explain yourself? For the nearly six month plus hiatus?

Alice: It was NOT a hiatus! It was just life keeping me busy. Remember Ultrra, when life gives you lemons...

Ultrra:...Make lemonade?

Alice: No. (Expression grows evil) _You squeeze those lemons in life's EYES for even thinking it can pwn you like a chump_. **You. PWN. LIFE**.** HARD.**

Ultrra: O_O

Alice: ^_^

Ultrra:...Did you ever work out those issues in therapy?

Alice:...In what now?

Ultrra: Ah, that's a _no _then.

Alice: One of the reviews asked if 'perceptions' is one of the themes in this story. And yep, it totally is. X) It's a huge theme! There's multiple characters who see themselves incorrectly, with Daisy being one of them, though she's getting better, _slowly. _And of course there's plenty of other characters out there who are lying and have ulterior motives. X)

Ultrra: _Ooooh_, tri-ckay! X)

Alice: That reminds me. We've got some warnings for this chapter. ^_^; The language is stronger and there's scenes with a little bit of graphic violence...I hope it doesn't upset anyone too badly. But I hope the head's up is helpful! ^_^;

Ultrra: (reads list) So in this chapter, readers should be aware of: language, a long chapter, violence, a darker chapter than normal and...

Alice:...And what?

Ultrra: And there's a _severe_ lack of emus in the chapter...Sorry guys...Particularly to the huge emu community out there supporting this fic.

(A random emu nearby glares at Ultrra, gets up and storms out in a huff)

Alice: O_O Oh dear...he did _not _take that very well.

Ultrra: (shrugs) Well, not everything is for everyone...Also who all has played Mario RPG, Legend of the Stars? Show of hands? (raises hand)

Alice: (raises hand)...

Ultrra:...Anyone who hasn't played that game NEEDS TO. STAT.

Alice: Yeah! It's my favorite Mario game ever! ^_^

Ultrra: The Red Essence in the Mario RPG game if you're not familiar with it, makes a person invincible for a limited amount of time. And the character who uses it glows red. This might be important later on in this chapter. ;)

Alice: Well, I hope the rest of you non-emus out there enjoy this chapter! (waves) ^_^; I hope this chapter is worth the wait, it's certainly an important one!

* * *

><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Twenty five years ago...<em>**

_The carriage came to a rolling halt as one of the thoroughbred steeds whickered softly and clomped its hooves against the dirt road. The chauffeur leapt from his padded seat and opened the carriage door with a bow, _"_Here we are sire! Destination reached, Lord Sakuro._"

"_Punctual timing. Thank you, Toss._"

_Sakuro exited the carriage in one effortlessly fluid movement, making sure to straighten the wrinkles from his crisp white robes. Even seconds after stepping out of the ride, a pungent rural odor viciously assaulted his senses. It took great self-restraint to ignore the strong musk of fresh manure and unwashed animal hide._

_But as the new emperor of Sarasaland, he would do well to acquire a new ally of the MooMoo Farmlands. He peered around, gauging the scenery with practiced tepid interest. Save the terrific agrarian odor, the MooMoo farm village was quite serene, maybe even deserving to be classified as beautiful; long, hilly strips of lime-green pasture faded into the bright blue horizon, bundles of trees were pregnant with ripe, delicious fruit, and fat, content cattle grazed in mindless droves._

_A welcoming, lush hilly expanse choked with bundles of wildflowers was where the mayor's home lay nestled; it was nothing more than a humble one-story cottage adorned with cream-colored paint, cutesy red roof tiles and matching brick-red shutters. Sakuro walked to the door with long, elegant strides befitting a man of his station. He adeptly ignored how his white robes dragged against the dirt road and sullied. Sakuro rapped on the door, neatly folding his hands behind his back, waiting patiently._

_And he waited._

_For ten minutes._

_Then another ten minutes slipped by..._

_The young emperor found his patience being terrifically tried as the blistering sun and muggy heat rained balmy misery._

"Hello? Is anyone present_?_"_ An edge of impatience sharpened his tone, "_Sarasaland has an appointment all of twenty minutes ago_._"

_He peered around, looking for any lingering stable hands or perhaps anyone knowledgeable enough to point him in the right direction. The only company for miles were the grazing cows, who peered at him with curious beady eyes as they chomped their fresh pasture grass._

_They all watched him with large chocolate eyes, either curious about the stranger or wondering why the _stupid_ human was baking in the hot sun. Even they were smart enough to graze in the cool shade._

_"_Hello!?" _this time he had a slight growl in his voice._

_"_Ain't noone there_."_

_Sakuro perked up, peering around curiously, _"...I beg your pardon_?_"

_The disembodied voice continued, _"Hi. The mayor ain't home."

_A flicker of red danced in the corner of his eye. Sakuro turned with his usual careful poise, "_I figured as much, do you know when he'd re—?"

_He paused, finally receiving a true look at the approaching woman. She was slim, of average height and wore an unremarkable, plain slate-blue work dress. Her complexion was smooth, reminiscent of rich caramel and she had the prettiest eyes he'd seen. The emperor stole another long eyeful of her, admiring her hair and how the thick, unruly mass of curls were as red as blood and fell well past her hips in a messy ponytail._

_The young emperor stared, brows slightly lifted and mouth askew in a form of silent awe._ _The woman wiped her forehead and smiled, placing the broom against the side of the house; Sakuro noticed how her eyes brightened, "_Howdy there fella! I'm the mayor's daughter. And you are_...?"_

_"_Sakuro_," he breathed softly; he barely remembered his name._

_He mentally shook himself, regaining his confidence in a bold flood. Sakuro's cool tenor had a slight purr as he preened, "_The _Emperor_ Sakuro_."_

_What woman wasn't impressed with a powerful man? Surely she would be won easily. Alas, her smile never faltered or changed after his declaration, "_Of where?"

_A slip of an arrogant grin crossed his lips, "_Sarasaland._"_

"...Where?"

_"_Of Sarasaland. It's a desert kingdom_."_

_"_Never heard of it before, sorry fella."

_"...Oh."_

_"_Must be really small if I never heard of it_," the woman rubbed her chin with contemplation, "_Like, reaaaal small_..."_

_He took a blow to his pride; he would have appreciated if she hit him with that old broom instead, "_It's a day's journey from here. I'm the youngest emperor to have been coronated in Sarasaland's history. It may be a small kingdom now, but with enough dedication, I shall make it well known_."_

_The woman's initial friendly expression never changed, "_That's mighty fancy. I like your determination."

_Sakuro's cool voice darkened like succulent chocolate, "_May I inquire the name of my fair lady_?"_

_"_Rose. And you got some of tha prettiest hair I've seen Sakuro."

_She laughed, leaning forward and softly touched his hair. Again his pride took another agonizing blow while Rose only smiled sweetly, as if unknowingly dissecting his masculine pride with lethal acuity. Sakuro ground his jaw,_ "It's nice. _Not_ pretty. 'Pretty' is a terrible adjective to use in such context_." I'm a man and men do __**not**__ have 'pretty' hair._

_"_And wearin' them fancy white robes? Tsk, tsk! Ya just gonna get 'em all dirty,"_ She placed a hand on her cocked hip and squinted, giving him a slow, thorough once-over that made his face color the faintest pink,_ "Tsk_. _For a guy who runs a kingdom, you sure make little sense, Sakuro_."_

_That was the third time he found himself flustered within minutes and it usually took mounds of insurrection to offend the equable young emperor. The Sarasalandian councilors have spoken far more cutting words and had less of an effect than this woman,"..."_

"Well, if ya lookin' for Pa, you're out of luck my friend. He won't be home 'til a little past three,"_ she peered at the sky purposefully and puckered her lips in thought, gauging time like a sundial. Her lush strawberry-red lips caught the emperor's attention and made him stare far longer than was polite._

_He snapped out of his mini_ _trance when he felt the weight of Rose's stare upon his skin. She was smiling sweetly at him again and the young emperor flushed at being caught red-handed. Then he processed the information she had shared;_ he'd have to wait how long!?

"Three_?_" _Again an edge of incredulity entered his voice, "_We have a meeting at noon. Specifically at _noon_."

_The pretty farmgirl shrugged haplessly, an amused smile glittering in the sun, "_The pigs probably got loose in town ag'in and he's wranglin' them up. Sneaky, wiggly critters they are_."_

_Sakuro peered at her with a mixture of dubiety and raw irritation._ So he's missing our meeting because of deviant swine!? This is quite enough. This is completely unprofessional and inconsiderate. If the councilors weren't evaluating me I'd have left this backwater place!

_"_Want some lemonade, Emperor_?" Rose asked with a smile, _"I was just gonna have a cup myself after a hard day o' farmwork. Y'know, I never heard of an emperor, is that like a king?"

_He took a calculated, controlled exhalation to reign his irritation,_ "Yes and emperor is used interchangeably in my case. And I would appreciate a cool beverage."

"You sure use some hoity-toity words there Sakuro. Strange name too. What's a 'sakuro'?"

"_..._My mother said when I was born, my skin reminded her of the beautiful petals of a flower_."_

_"_Sarasaland folk name their sons after flowers? Weird. But in a good kind of weird_."_

_Again he wasn't sure if he should be offended_, "Thanks...?"

_She opened the door to the humble home and smiled, _"In ya go emperor_."_

_Rose performed a mocking bow and laughed deeply. Before passing by, Sakuro gauged her, eyeing her petulant behavior with disdain and a stiff upper lip; she had big pretty eyes, a fan of mahogany lashes and one of the prettiest smiles he could recall. Her blue dress was plain, leather gloves worn and dirty and her work boots were terrifically caked in mud—or manure—hopefully the former._

_But the dirty clothes didn't detract from the shapely figure or the smooth skin and her accent didn't detract from the honey-smooth quality of her voice. The smooth muscle hinted at a toned a figure and he could only wonder if she was built like that all over._

_And she was outspoken, lively and comedic. The ladies of the Sarasalandian court were indeed beautiful and comely, but they were so submissive and docile. He found her fascinating in a way no other woman had captured his interest before._

_"_You gonna keep starin' Sakuro? It's either in or out_?" She laughed._

_For one of the few times his face burned red as Rose laughed. She leaned forward, grinning like a Cheshire blitty and startled him into fumbling away from encroachment. His back hit the doorjamb with an audible thud as she pressed forward, peering at him with a borderline wicked smile._

_"_Y'know Sakuro..."_ her round, cherub-like eyes drank in his features with interest, "_For a stiff, regal king...You're kinda _cute."_

_She flicked his nose playfully and winked. This time he gawked inelegantly, forgetting all his kingly decorum and composition as his face flamed red yet again and for the second time Rose laughed heartily, eyes squinted and cheeks flushed red. Just then a big brawny man with a wild shock of red hair appeared, glaring at Sakuro; he looked like he was fitting to kick his ass._

_"_Rosie_," the redheaded mammoth growled darkly, "_who tha hell is this scrawny goon standin' on my porch_?"_

_Sakuro arched an eyebrow_; _g_oon? Scrawny?!

_"_There's pa now_!" Rose beamed._

_This was the mayor he'd have to meet with!? The big red haired man hugged Rose, nuzzling her with paternal warmth before turning to face him with a looming antagonistic aura of furor and death. Sakuro sighed; something tells him this was going to be a loooong day._

* * *

><p><em>It seems like yesterday, one day I'm walking down the aisle with Rose and now, it won't be too long before Daisy is wed...Can you believe it Rose? Stars help me, my little Chisana is going to be married soon...Seems like yesterday she was just a little girl...<em>

Sakuro was perched in the Emperor's personal library buried up to his elbows in books and encyclopedias. He leaned away from the table, kneading his thumb and forehead against the bridge of his nose to relieve a throbbing headache. The moment Daisy and his mother had departed from Sarasaland's borders he had been wrought with worry.

He had spent the following days trying to work himself to the bone to avoid wandering thoughts that always seemed to return to his daughter's welfare. He had accepted all kinds of meetings, even showed up for a surprise and visited a prominent elementary school. But no matter how he fought, the intrusive thoughts bubbled into existence: what if Daisy became ill? Or if she was hurt? Stars knows she could trip over thin air. Or what if one of those young _brats tried_something with her?

_I know exactly what I'd do. Killing those miscreants swiftly would be too easy. I'd introduce them to the ancient iron maiden within our museum walls..._

Angora LeCatte strolled into the emperor's library with a tray of piping hot sweet mint tea and his majesty's favorite breakfast muffins. Delivering the Emperor's breakfast was below her station as a noblewoman but sometimes, things needed to be done by one's own self to accomplish a goal or two.

Her blue, feline-like eyes swept over the span of the library before the emperor was found, oddly enough he had spent the last few days cubbyholed in the library researching who knows what, "Emperor, I have brought a treat."

There were a circle of books spread far across his personal oak wood table and at the head was a diligent Sakuro leafing through and industriously marking pages. She set the tray beside him, as silent as a shadow as he muttered a soft thank you.

Lady Angora preened, nodding her head. Angora wore her most comely dress that gave her hips and bust an hour-glass flare and her most deliciously _sinful_ maroon-red lipstick. She even donned her most attention-worthy pearl necklace.

She stood with perfect posture, ever elegant and when she spoke, Angora's voice was honeyed and feminine, "May I inquire as to what his Lordship is studying? The servants have been worried about you for some time. It's been two days and we've missed the sight of our king."

"I'm studying a self-indulgent interest," he didn't bother to look up, "However, thank you for the kind consideration Lady LeCatte."

He didn't even look at her _once. _If the responding pleasantry in Angora's voice was forced, she was an expert at hiding it,"...It is my pleasure, Milord."

And with a demure bow she turned and left. Though she did manage to discreetly read one of the textbook's covers. Thinking nothing of the oddity of the titles and the old, yellowing, chewed pages, she turned and left, licking her wounds.

_What in the world is so interesting that he couldn't even look up at me just ONCE? Twenty years ago I could turn heads simply by stepping into a room. I'm going to go and...watch soaps, engorge chocolate and wine like a glutton until I feel BETTER. Best make it fat-free chocolate of course. A lady must never lose her wondrous figure..._

* * *

><p>Even before the sun had risen, snoozing languidly behind its plush pillowing of dark clouds and nestled within blankets of crisp, cool predawn air, the Darklandian king had been wide awake. He had lain awake for countless hours, staring at his ceiling miles above his head, haunted by things that should have been said last night.<p>

_Flower, can't you see that I love you? You're the only girl for me._ And haunted those words that weren't uttered. _Enough of this stupid suitor business. I'm the guy you've been looking for this whole time. I'll do anything to make you happy. Anything._

He replayed every laugh, every smile, every soft gasp of pleasure like a scratched DVD; all too much of an expert on how perfect her soft lips had felt and how she had shivered when he pulled her flush against his plastron.

Bowser crushed his palms over his face with building frustration, angrily rubbing his aching eyes as a rough growl broke from his chest. Every touch, every word spoken and every heated petal-soft kiss from last night had been burned, branded into his memory with a painful amount of impeccability.

He glared at the alarm clock beside his bed and rose with gloomy reluctance. And just because he never liked alarm clocks in the first place—they were evil, unholy torture devices born from hell and destroyed his masculine beauty sleep—he smashed the holy _shit_ out of it _just because_.

Bowser peered at his reflection gravely. It was obvious he was tired and though he looked worse for wear, he was _still _ten times more attractive than Daisy's most attractive suitor, and twenty times more attractive than that damn Shinobi™. He went through his morning ritual with no real zeal and didn't even bother to greet his reflection with a self-indulgent _lookin_' _good king._

But when he stared at his reflection for the _thirtieth _time that morning, he started to feel a little better about himself. He curled a bicep, making the muscles in his arm bulge with impressive definition. _I'd like to see those scrawny bastards do _that. _Mario _wishes _he had some of those guns._

There was a knock on the door and by reflex, Bowser titled his head to the side, thoughtfully scenting the air. _No one _of sound mind would have the balls—or lack of self-preservation—to attempt waking him before seven am. The person on the other side of the door smelt like a mixture of acrylic paint and peanut butter. _Well that solves it. Only my youngest knucklehead would be clueless, or dumb enough to do such a thing._

"C'mon in Sprat Junior."

Junior popped in, dancing around to a soundless melody only he heard in his head; it was crap like _that _Bowser worried about. But Junior continued his idiotic, childish prancing, "Good morning King Dad! Good _moooornin_g~!"

As he pranced around and kartwheeled, Bowser arched an eyebrow; which reminds him, he'd have to get Junior's head _checked_ later. He couldn't—and wouldn't—deal with _another_ crazy kid; the twins were certified and probably would lead him to having premature gray mane.

"What do you want?" And though Bowser tried to sound intimidating and tough, his voice wasn't as steely as he thought. Junior owned a complete monopoly on being able to turn the most hardass, most cold-hearted stiffs into smiling, affectionate mushes of goop with the twinkle of his darling smile and warmth of his big, innocent eyes.

Speaking of innocent, fawn-like eyes, Junior's complete expression glowed as recollection returned to him, "Oh! That's right! I came here for a reason!"

Bowser smirked; _no friggin' shit, Sherlockshell, _"Alright, why are you here Junior?"

Junior took that as his cue, suddenly slapping a salute to his forehead, "_Sir!_ First Sergeant Bowser Junior reporting for duty _sir!"_

Bowser stamped his foot, placing his arms behind his back like a high-ranking commander and spoke gruffly, "At ease solider."

"Sir yes_ sir_!" Junior chirruped.

"Solider _report_!" Bowser suddenly bellowed, "What intelligence have you gathered on the 'targets'?"

Still playing the role of commander, Bowser began to pace around Junior, watching his soldier with discerning, patient eyes.

"Everything's a-go sir!" Junior gave a report, "The 'troublesome targets' have been trying to prank everyone in the palace. The target code named 'shades' has been hitting on 'babes.'"

"So the maids then," Bowser muttered to himself softly, "What about the uh...'emo' target? Has this target been causing trouble while the commander has been gone?"

"Negative! The target has been in his room composing...uh...whatever stuff he always composes. Over and Out."

Yes. He used his youngest Koopaling to tattle and spy on the others. But Junior was the best set of eyes _ever._

"Hmm," Bowser rubbed his chin, "Anything about the lil Koopette of the house?"

"Sir yes sir!"

Bowser growled, his mane standing on end, "She hasn't been talking to any_ boys_ has she?!"

"Negative, but she seems to think some loser named Kooper is cute, sire! Over and out."

"And where did you find this intel?"

"Her diary, sir!"

"Kooper was his name? Good. I'll find him and have his house blown the hell _up_. Anything else?"

"That is all, sire! Over and out."

"Solider," Bowser tried to hold in a laugh, "You only say 'over and out' over a comlink. Anyways, good job cadet, continue to be my eyes and ears when I'm not around. Watch everyone for your commander and the next time I see you, I'll want a full report, got it?"

"Yes sir!" Junior saluted again, "Uh...Permission to speak, sir?"

"What is it cadet?"

"Permission for launch?" Junior asked, still completely serious.

This time Bowser half laughed, confused, "..._What?_"

"Permission to launch, sire."

Launch? Launch _what _exactly? Bowser half shrugged, "Uh...yeah? Go for it...I _guess._"

And with one last salute Junior marched out of the room with an exaggerated march; he stomped so hard his knees rose to the middle of his torso. Bowser nearly burst into laughter when he heard Junior start a military cadence on his way out, "I dunno but I've been _toooold_! King Bowser's wrath be mighty _coooold!_"

Smirking, Bowser shook his head, lips betraying his stern, kingly countenance as his expression twisted into something far too similar to a smile;_ what a stupid, cute kid._

These were the fun years of parenting. He'd enjoy this kind of nutty stuff with his young Koopaling before Junior transformed into a girl-crazed, hormonal, zitty oil bag. And when that day came, when Junior was all grown up, Bowser would proudly hand his youngest brat the keys to Lady-slayer Inc. and help the little chip off the old block become the rightful heir to being the biggest, baddest, sexiest studmuffin of the Darklands.

Only _second_ to his good ole dad of course. Because the previous generation never outdoes its predecessors.

* * *

><p>"M-Mamacita don't <em>goooooooooo<em>!"

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"Remember," Wendy spoke in a knowledgeable tone, "the moisturizer comes first and like, _then _apply the bronzer for beautiful, glowing skin! A princess like, always needs wondrous skin!"

"You've lost that loooovin' _feeeling_!" Larry half sang half wailed with fake tears.

Lemmy harmonized in an awful bass, "Whoooa that lovin' feeeeeling!"

Then they both put their heads together to belt out, "You've lost that looooooovin' feeling now it's go—"

"Shut the hell _up_!" Bowser snapped with thinned patience and pinched brows, "You two brats are making noise _just _to make noise!"

I laughed, affectionately ruffling the twins' frock of wild, multi-colored mane as they clutched me closely for a breath-stealing hug. Our final departure was already in motion and the only thing left to do was say our farewells. It seemed the Koopalings wanted to send me off with gifts.

I gave each Koopaling a hug and they in turn gave a present: Wendy gave an exclusive bronzer, the twins gave me whoopee cushions, Morton a book profiling the best Super Striker charged players. Roy didn't have the same attachments to me as his siblings did; he was content to simply give a half-hearted wave.

As Iggy muttered a soft, shy farewell he handed over a pretty, handmade cake that was small enough to fit in my enclosed palms. It was decorated with white and teal frosting and looked like something I could find at an overpriced cupcake shop.

"Thanks Iggy! I'll scarf it down in a heartbeat!" I grinned widely before placing a chaste kiss against the side of his cheek. I laughed deeply as Iggy blazed five different shades of red, blushing so hard his face was nearly purple.

Ludwig stepped up afterwards, giving a CD with a new, unreleased song. I was surprised when Ludwig purposely cleared his throat and tapped his cheek, signaling he wanted a kiss like the rest of his younger brothers.

I planted a kiss onto the side of his cheek, and was rewarded the moment his face flamed red. He rubbed the back of his head with an unusually shy smile as I laughed softly.

Grammy was hard at work, busy trying to spoil the Koopalings rotten in her last remaining seconds by administering an endless supply of sugary candies, grandmotherly kisses and treats. Even Ludwig who was slow to trust and even more wary to become fond of someone, had been worked over enough by Grammy's nurturing charm. In the end the aloof composer gave her a meaningful departing hug.

Bowser and I had finished hugging the last of the Koopalings and when I turned to Bowser Junior, his face was screwed up, bravely trying to hold in his tears. Grammy cooed with motherly warmth, kindly pulling the upset Koopaling into a comforting hug. That sweet motion seemed to bring down the last of Junior's restraint as he burst into tears.

"What a lil' _cry baby_," Roy huffed under his breath.

"G-Grammy!" he sobbed, "I-I want you and M-Mama Daisy to _stay_!"

"Oh I know, Sugarshell. Goodbyes are _so_ hard! But be of good cheer! We'll be back soon, I promise!" Grammy spoke tenderly, holding Junior close and rubbing the back of his shell. I didn't miss how she discreetly snuck him several extra sugary lollipops with only the practiced, sneaky craft a grandmother could pull off _right_ under a watching parent's nose; Bowser was none the wiser, "I think you should see your Mama now, huh? Bet she'd like a good bye hug too, Sweetie."

Junior ran over to me bawling, sniffling and blubbering incoherent phrases. I tried to hide my smile as I held my arms out for a hug. Junior leapt into my arms, wailing even harder, pressing his head against my stomach as he latched onto me with despair.

"M-Mama Daisy! _Don't go_! _Please!_" he sobbed. "I-I'll be a good Koopaling if you stay! I'll even do my chores a-and eat broccoli! And I _hate b_roccoli because...broccoli is_ yucky!_"

Hmm. You know, BJ has a point: broccoli _is _pretty awful...

"Be a good Koopaling!?" Lemmy said with a faux offended voice, "Well I _never...!"_

"We should totally jack his lollipops for that!" Larry huffed.

And with one meaningful, stern look from their father, the twins quickly backtracked, "I-I mean, we should..._happily share _our candy with our brother! Our _dear, _precious, _beloved _little brother!"

"Our little _treasure_!" Lemmy chimed in.

Junior was pulling out a professional grade of puppy eyes; he had expertly deployed the trembling, pouting bottom lip and was blinking back tears. I laughed, slipping onto my knees until I was eye level with the sobbing Koopaling. Junior rubbed at his eyes with pudgy fists, trying his best not to cry.

When King Boo thought no one was paying him any attention, he suddenly materialized behind Luigi with a scary grin and sharp fangs bared. Bowser peered in his direction and rolled his eyes with great exasperation.

"_Ichabod_..." Bowser sighed and pinched the bridge of his snout with his thumb and pointer, "Will you put the _damn _bomb-omb out!? Stop trying to kill Greenstache."

What?

We turned around and sure enough King Boo was holding a dangerous, lit bomb-omb beside Luigi's head with a wild, savage grin. Luigi paled, becoming as white as a sheet as King Boo sighed dismally, "_I was not going to hurt the Green maintenance man. I was just going to...simply..."_

"Simply what!?" Wolfe gaped, half stunned and maybe even amused.

"_Just...blow him up...a little..._?"

_Just_ 'blow him up a little'!? Did I really just hear that!? Better yet, how do you just blow someone up a _little!?_ But with Bowser's unyielding, pointed glared, the ghost king growled, defeated.

"..._Oh feces!_" the Boo snapped, irritated. He thoughtlessly chucked the lit bomb-omb over his shoulder seconds before it blew up. I swore I heard a shriek of pain. King Boo neared Luigi again, "_Oh Green maintenance maaaan~ are you thirsty? I have a beverage I would like you to try..._"

In his ghostly hands materialized a fancy jeweled chalice. In the goblet was a disgusting, bubbling green brew that smoked like chemicals. I'm no expert, but that was _clearly_ poisonous, maybe even an extremely diluted acid. King Boo floated closer, continuing to offer Lulu the drink of death, his insane grin only growing larger as Luigi backed away.

Junior held back another sniffle as I sighed, "Junior, you know I'll be back, okay? No need for anymore tears, huh?" I took my thumb and gently swiped it across his wet cheek, collecting beads of tears under my nail.

"Y-You'll always be my Mama Daisy?" he whispered, sniffling.

I smiled, "I'll always be your Mama Daisy."

His eyebrows rose hopefully, "A-And you'll be K-King Dad's wife?"

_...Huh? _I stopped smiling altogether and in my peripheral I saw Bowser flinch. One of the twins snickered, catcalling loudly but the raucous cheer quickly choked off into a yelp of pain when I heard a loud _smack_. Junior continued to bore into my soul with an expectant smile and big, glittering eyes.

I could hear Grammy's laughter even before I saw her, "Yes little one, she'll always be your mommy."

That seemed to settle the little prince and I gave Junior a kiss, leaving a nude pink lip-print against his cheek; Junior was_ quite_ the lady's man, on his right cheek emblazoned a rich plum lipstick print from Grammy and now on his left cheek he had my glowing kiss. Junior hugged me one last time before sniffling.

"Mama Daisy, h-here's my gift to you."

Stunned, I peered at the tiny gift, "Oh. It's...it's a Flash tonic! Wow. You know, I've been meaning to ask your dad to get some of these for me..."

"Yeah! There you go!" he bobbed his head exuberantly, "Now you can breathe fire like a_ real_ Koopette! King Dad's queen has to blow fire! So get _reeeal _good at it Mama Daisy! Practice, practice, practice!"

I carefully closed my fingers over the flame-red glass bottle, thoughtlessly peering after Junior. He raced over to Bowser, exploding once more in a fit of tears. Bowser laughed, picking up Junior and holding him high overhead before holding him close to his torso, speaking to the whimpering Koopaling in a soft, deep purr.

While the other suitors boarded the plane, I lingered behind, trying to catch a glimpse of the heart-warming scene. Bowser was still consoling his youngest, laughing and speaking in hushed tones—probably to avoid embarrassing him in front of his older siblings—and when Wolfe started towards the plane, I could catch the faintest traces of their conversation.

"—lucky you, got yourself a kiss from a pretty—"

"And then _BOOM_!" Wolfe bellowed with laughter, in the middle of sharing a wild story with Ryu and Silver, "I fell into the mud with the piranha tumbling after me. He was trying to bite my head off!"

"Which _one_ I wonder...?" Zero whispered none too softly.

Either Wolfe ignored him or didn't hear his innuendo; the former obviously; Canine hearing could detect a pin drop in a crowded room, "Hell yeah I was scared. Who wouldn't be with a fat, ugly weed chasing after you and—"

"—be our mama?" Junior whispered, eyes shining with hope.

Bowser laughed softly, "Want me to win her, eh?"

"I want you and Mama Daisy to—"

To? To _what!?_

"_AAAAIIIIIE!_ And then I grabbed that huge, scaly plant like_ RAAAAWR_ baby!" Wolfe was really getting into his story, even mirroring the fierce expression he wore, "Teeth bared, muscles _bulging a_nd then _KA-POOM_—!"

"_Wolfe!_" I snapped; Stars! I was t_rying _to do some quality _eavesdropping_ here! How could I hear what Bowser and Junior were saying if he's shouting every other word!? _Geesh!_ A girl's trying to be _nosey _here and I can't do that if I can't hear them!

"_Yeeees_ darling?" Wolfe spun around, batting his eyes ridiculously. Silver laughed softly as Ryu shot an amused smirk my direction.

I half sighed and half laughed, "Oh Never mind! What a dork..."

When I turned to face Bowser, it was too late; he had said a few words to Kammy and Kamek and was heading towards the plane. Before I could turn away our eyes locked. The king's austere expression softened as he titled his head, suddenly smirking with muted amusement. The rising sun's luminous scorching tendrils smoldered, setting his mane ablaze like flames.

He continued to hold my stare, sauntering nearer with an unhurried amble. With each enclosing step that he drew closer, my nerves fluttered wildly like anxious butterflies. I chewed on the inside of my cheek charily; should I...talk to him about yesterday? Or should I pretend it didn't even happen...?

_Beautiful laaaady..._

I hadn't spoken a single word since he ran off yesterday and I hope it wouldn't make things awkward between us or...

_My heart siiiings..._

I continued watching, studying Bowser's mysterious mien as the sun blazed directly behind his shaggy head, inking his expression with thick veils of obscure shadows.

_We started out as friends but now it seems..._

I arched an eyebrow; uh who was that singing? Bowser must of thought the same thing as he peered around wildly. King Boo suddenly materialized between Bowser and I. He placed a ghostly mitt on each of our shoulders, slowly drawing us both closer, continuing to belt out notes in a rich, classically trained voice that sounded _nothing_ like his own. My jaw dropped as Bowser glared at him with a crazed expression, "_And then suddenly have changed_—"

"_If you don't_ _shut the hell __**up**_, Icky I _will _shove your disappearing, ghostly _ass _into a low budget vacuum," Bowser growled, dark smoke starting to seep from between his teeth.

"_You simply do not appreciate the fine arts. I was trying to set a mood after all,"_ King Boo grinned wickedly, peering between the two of us with an amused grin.

"And _what_ mood is that?" Bowser snapped, patience all but dissolved.

_"A mood for a romantic kiss at a blessed sunrise! Now then King Bowser, reach down, wrap your arms around the princess and kiss your beloved! I will possess your scaly hide and do it myself if you do not!"_

"Did somebody say something about _King Daddio kissing Mamacita_!?"

Eight Koopaling heads peered in our direction with obvious interest and several sets of sly smiles. Not only just that, but the sounds of the external environment around us completely fell silent in a sudden whorl. Even the other suitors—Ryu, Wolfe, Silver—who had been on their way to boarding the plane, had stopped to peer back at us with intense stares.

All the unexpected attention had blood rushing to my face, skin burning like a scalding iron. My nerves shot through the roof when I caught sight of even _Kamek _and _Kammy _smirking with a sort of _knowing_ superiority.

Immediately I turned, lifting the hem of my dress as I clumsily ascended the stairs to the plane. Ryu and Wolfe were still lingering nearby and helped me up the stairs graciously. Bowser snarled loudly as King Boo burst with loud, wicked glee. Why was I running to avoid Bowser?

Well...

Sometimes in life...we have that _real_ awkward moment with a friend and you hope not to run into them anytime soon? Well, that's _exactly _where I was with Bowser. We had had a great evening together and after sharing a confusing, wondrous kiss that made my head spin and heart pulse with jolts of electricity, he suddenly turned and ran off, shattering any kind of romantic confidence I felt.

The entire night I had replayed that image in my mind on rewind, hoping I could unearth something I missed; had I offended him? Why had he looked so...pained? So edgy? His eyes had bled an eerie, unusual dark shade, a curious fusion of liquid garnet and amethyst purple.

So what was my mature, adult way of trying to handle things?

By running the hell _away_ from it.

I could practically _feel _his stare burning into my back and even as I entered the plane, I knew he was no more than a few steps behind. Low and behold, Bowser entered seconds after I did, standing close enough that I could feel the warmth exuding from his large frame. I swallowed thickly, face heating as I tried to ignore how my temperature caught fire.

Zero was holding up the line with the flight attendants having to muscle and fight his luggage into the diminutive overhead compartment. Grammy peered between Bowser and I discreetly, raising a skeptical eyebrow at our level of unspoken awkward tension. She leaned in, cupping her palms over her mouth to whisper.

"Did something happen? You and King Bowser aren't speaking..." She tapped a gloved index finger against her cheek, "...Among other things."

"Uh it's nothing Grammy," I laughed nervously, "Everything's fine! Really!"

Grammy's skeptical look caused me to babble on ever longer, "Oh come on! Really! It's _fine_!"

"I don't believe you one bit, _Pichi_."

"Let's just go to our seats and—"

Grammy suddenly interrupted, pointing to something behind my shoulder, "Oh! _Pichi_, look! What's _that_?"

I turned my head—as well as Bowser, Ryu and Wolfe all whom must have heard her exclamation—to look at a...door? But the second I turned a blind eye to my grandmother, Grammy hip-bumped me into the person standing behind. I staggered, collapsing against the hard, cool plastron of...Bowser. He blinked in astonishment, catching me more from reflex than with true intent.

My face seared twelve different levels of red as I leveled a furious glare at Grammy, who suddenly became the poster child of feigned innocence. _She had set me up!_ And I can't _believe_ I fell for the oldest trick in the book! Grammy grinned like a Cheshire blitty and with wicked exuberance, waved mockingly before taking her seat; _son of a_...she did that _on purpose_. Now I_ have_ to face Bowser!

_Sheyt in a chef salad!_

It wasn't even moments later when Bowser lifted me to my feet with purposefully careful, gentle movements. His voice came out in a soft growl, almost similar to the tone he had spoken to Junior with, "Be careful there, Princess Sarasaland."

My cheeks heated as I turned to face him; I realized we were standing in the middle of the hallway completely visible to anyone nosey enough to stick their head and peer out our way. But the flight attendants were busy making final checks as the pilots spoke to the Darklandian mechanics. The suitors themselves were chatting amiably amongst each other.

"Uh..." I began as eloquently as ever.

"Do you think we...can talk somewhere quiet?" he nearly whispered.

I sounded just as hesitant, "Uh...yeah sure."

He cut a glare to the side, "I'd talk here but we're dealing with some _major_ eavesdropping _tools_ on our hands."

That led to a chain reaction as my suitors _not so subtly_ moved away. Wolfe _immediately_ spun around, facing forward and pretending really unconvincingly that he _hadn't _been listening as Zero smoothly opened a book that he hadn't cared about prior. I laughed softly, grinning widely in amusement, "Alright, point taken. To the back we go."

When I tried to let Bowser pass, he smirked, intentionally taking a step backwards to impede progress. I arched a brow at his lopsided smirk, "What? I clearly want you to go first. Since it is _you _who wants to talk."

One side of Bowser's mouth curled into a lopsided, sly grin, "Cute girls first."

And that devilish grin only spread, baring sharp incisors when my face glowed from his barefaced compliment. I hastily spun on my heel, marching towards the rear of the plane, trying to ignore the annoying smug grin I knew was on Bowser's mug.

We shuffled out of hearing range and the second Bowser was sure no one would hear him, he turned to face me with obvious hesitance, "Yeah...I...just want to say...s-sorry."

I blinked; that's definitely not what I expected to hear, "...Sorry?"

"Yeah," he scrubbed at the back of his head, making sure to deflect his eyes, "I...shouldn't have ran off like an _idiot_. Like a friggin' soggy idiot sandwich. I...I...don't want you thinking I didn't like that kiss..."

My face flushed as he continued, "I mean...I liked it. I-I liked it _alot_! Heh, _shit_...A Koopa liked it a bit _too _much. Kissing you is like...like...uh...licking a rainbow. Not...that I've ever tasted a rainbow before...a-and honestly there _was _this_one _time I thought about trying to lick the rainbow road...but that was a_long _time ago...uh...but yeah...the kiss was _that _awesome! It was _awesome._"

"_Bowser..._" It felt like a bunch of fireflies were having a crazy, rave party inside my blistering-hot cheeks.

"It got me all fired up and the Koopa hormones were stirring—you see, we Koopas have this...Uh..._thing_ that happens when w-we get...let's say '_excited_' a-and...last night, I had to leave you b-because the hormones made me _crazy._And when I say _crazy, _I mean _craaaaazy._ A-And you were wearing that dress. Oh _Stars _were you wearin' the _hell _outta that dress. Not like I was ogling you—okay, I kinda _was_—b-but you looked _real _pretty Flower...and I...I..."

The king's face suddenly flushed a deep, rich burgundy before burying his face into his palms and throwing his head back with exasperation, "Argh! _Singing sandwiches of...dookie!_" I choked back laughter as he continued in a rough growl, "I've gone and made a complete _ass_ of myself in front of you _again_..."

Bowser finished the dramatics by promptly about-facing, tail thrashing as he grumbled disparaging words and uttered creative curses under his breath in a self-effacing snarl. I hid yet _another _laugh with a strategic cough. Here stood the_evil, satanic_, legendary demon king who was feared by even the most heroic of men...and yet the _legendary demon _king was...hiding his face from a tiny princess like a scolded toddler.

The theatrics were overly dramatic and _completely_ unnecessary but there was something endearing within his uncustomary, extraordinarily shy mannerisms. Heh, dare I say, it was kind of _cute._ For someone who had a massive, bloated ego and solely spearheaded one of the most prosperous kingdoms bar none, Bowser's inane sense of self could be easily wrecked in the bat of a lash.

"Bowser," I reached for his hands and using my most patient, most gentle coo, I slowly peeled his massive fingers from his scowling features. He blinked down at me with surprise, "It's okay, alright? I think I know what you're trying to get at. I want to let you know I really enjoyed myself last night. And I _think_there was a compliment _somewhere_ in your speech. Let's just get back to our seats so we can depart already..."

I laughed softly, impatiently flicking an errant strand of curly, fire-red fringe from my eyes, "Are we okay again? No more silly awkwardness?"

A smile that wasn't quite as ruthless as usual crossed his face, "...Alright then Flower. I'm glad you had fun yesterday."

"I did," I playfully nudged his arm, "Now let's go."

I tried my best to push him forward, but he wasn't budging, intentionally. Bowser smirked, amusement dancing in his eyes as he continued to watch me attempt the impossible; moving his heavy, scaly backside.

Finally he gave in and played along. With an _oh so_ exasperated rolling of the eyes, he finally began to move forward, making it appear that I was strong enough to move him with my own might. It wasn't much longer when he fell into his seat beside Luigi. I was surprised when I caught a glimpse of what looked to be a warm, true smile from the king.

I was so taken off guard that I froze.

"Will you please take your seat, Princess?" A flight attendant spoke in a saccharine, practiced voice, "We will be departing in a few minutes."

"Uh...yeah, sure," I sat next to Grammy who pretended to read a novel.

"_So_..." Grammy licked her finger, turning a page in her book with extra exaggeration. She peered at me with a large grin. Her periwinkle eyes twinkled rakishly as her rosy lips curled into a sly grin, "Did you discuss _anything_ with King Bowser? You need to talk to that young shell and quit being awkward with him."

"And _you _need to stop meddling, Grammy!" I tried not to laugh when she cackled, squealing like a pig, "You know _exactly_ what you were doing!"

"I was just trying to...help move things along," she grinned, smiling all too innocently.

"You were just being _nosey_!" I laughed, pinching her side.

Grammy returned the pinch as I released a deep sigh. I rested my head against my grandmother's shoulder and it wasn't seconds later when soft fingers began to affectionately comb through my hair. Her soft, soothing humming and gentle touch were more than enough to lull me into a light slumber.

"Grammy?" I whispered drowsily, sleep bogging down my voice.

"What is it, _Pichi?"_

"...Do you think my husband's here? The right guy?"

"He is," she soothed, "Now hush up and rest."

* * *

><p>It was several hours into the flight when Bowser decided to stretch his legs. For the past hour or so, he had been trying to <em>graciously <em>teach Greenstache his own, personal studly secret to flexing but sometimes being related to Mario had its curse. Greenstache for the life of him didn't _want_ to flex. _Probably that stupid older, fatter Plumber's influence._

Just as the Darklandian studmuffin king considered _maybe_ walking past Flower and '_accidently'_ flexing his biceps in front of her, Empress Meringue approached and it wasn't long before he detected her soft footfalls and lingering aroma that smelt like a mixture of mint and lavender. He turned to her with a smirk and since they were alone, he spoke without the usual rough growl lacing his word, "Grammy, what can I trouble you for?"

He wouldn't let anyone know, but he had become quite fond of the lively, sprightly empress. She had no trouble embarrassing her cute granddaughter and he _tolerated_ the times when she turned that same mischief onto him. If he had to choose between his hatred for Mario or his fondness for Grammy, he wouldn't be able to decide. And he really, _really_ hated Mario.

"Bowser my dear," it struck him immediately that her usual affectionate smile was missing; she was one of the few people who _ever _showed him such true warmth, "I have something I must ask of you..."

His smile diminished at the empress' uncommon, staid visage; her white brows were pinched together, forming a crinkle at the bridge of her small nose and her plum lips were pulled into a taut, thin line. Though his expression remained pleasant, he watched her much closer, "Sure, what is it?"

"It may not make much sense what I ask of you right this second..." she sighed softly, rubbing a gloved, satin finger against her temple, "You might even think I'm paranoid. I would feel at ease if I knew you were watching over my granddaughter. And I know this is all so sudden...but please, promise me you'll...watch over my little _Pichi_. We're going to the Aqualands and...I..."

She paused, bowing her head, as if too ashamed to look him in the eye while airing her request. She fiddled with her pearl necklace nervously and Bowser was surprised when he caught a subtle, almost undetectable tang of fear scent the air. Queen Meringue steeled her nerves; closing her eyes and releasing a soft breath before speaking, her voice rattling, "Please...never let her out of your sight..."

The sight of the kind empress's fret fired up his protective instincts to a blazing full throttle. It even pissed him off that there was something that could manage to trouble the sweet, motherly empress of Sarasaland. Primal Koopa impulse kicked in with savage zeal as his mane barbed up in shaggy spikes, as his eyes narrowed with rigor and blazed hot with intensity. His voice dropped into a fierce, guttural growl, "Is something wrong, Empress? Is there something I _need _to know...?"

If she thought Flower was in any kind of real danger, he'd maim and bleed someone in a heartbeat, no questions asked. "No," Meringue shook her head, brows still crinkled with worry, "It's just...Oh, now I've gone and upset you. I just...I'd feel better if I knew _you_ were watching over my granddaughter. Would you do that? And help placate this old woman's fears?"

Bowser's severe visage softened; he was still unsure of what to make of the empress's sudden concern, but he knew he'd do anything to assuage her anxieties, "I dunno what's going on, but just know you didn't have to even ask. It'd be my pleasure Grammy."

He took the empress's tiny hand and squeezed with friendly reassurance. It wasn't too soon when Grammy's soft, plum lips rounded into a subtle smile. He had seen, been through too much adversity to return a kind smile but his eyes softened, glowing with warmth, "I promise to watch over Flower and when I make a promise, my word is as good as gold."

Meringue's bluest of blue eyes twinkled as she squeezed his large palm back, "_Oh Bowser_...if only she'd come to her senses and see what she's always had in you."

Astonished, Bowser blinked back wordlessly, completely unsure of how to respond to such frank sincerity. Meringue's eyes crinkled with mirth and with a quick hug, she turned and left. She peered at him with a parting smile, eyes bright, "See you later, _Diyo._"

Bowser stared, watching the Empress as she returned to her seat. Uh, what? Dibo? Digo? Diyo? What the hell did that mean? And what had Grammy so worried? The thought of something bothering the empress didn't sit well with him.

A kind, nice woman like her deserved to be happy and carefree during the autumn of her life. And if there was something out there that could worry Meringue, it _must _have been some _serious _badass _shit_. Grammy was usually more relaxed than a Wiggler junkie strung out on honey syrup.

And that's _preeeeeetty _strung _out._

"She really likes you, the Empress I mean."

Bowser wheeled around, facing that one human tool. The one with the slicked back golden hair that looked permanently ironed against his skull and had a fondness for expensive suits. Let it be known, the king hated _all _of Flower's suitors because they were just that, suitors—though he hated Dog-Boy and Greenstache half an inch less than all the rest—but he hadn't interacted enough with _this_ loser to hate him more than he did than that damn Shinobi™.

The Aqualandian heir was thoughtfully sipping some kind of beverage in a martini glass, peering at him with a cool, calculated curiosity. Taurus rested his free hand in the pocket of his freshly pressed suit, still taking Bowser in with a languid gaze that belied none of his true thoughts.

"Do all human royals spew random stupid things or are you just a special case?" Bowser grunted.

The blonde royal blinked, as if taken back before a smile curled upon his lips, "You speak exactly what's on your mind, decorum be damned huh? I like that."

He huffed, "Yeah _whatever_."

_Punk. _He didn't want to _speak _with these _creatures_ that tried to compete with him for Flower's affection. He barely tolerated Dog-boy and that was _it._ He brushed past Taurus roughly, having half a mind to shove his pompous ass into a wall, but word would probably get back to Flower.

Bowser shot him an irate glare in passing, however what the king missed was how Taurus' silver, serpentine eyes trailed him intently. Silver irises burned unblinkingly against the back of his shell.

"...Interesting indeed."

* * *

><p>It was half past ten when we finally arrived in the Aqualands. The sky was an uninteresting steely stretch of gray and silver splotches; the air was cold and biting like winter's breath.<p>

A thin, light mist only made the stinging cold that much more prevalent and that much more _annoying_. Those of us from warmer climates were paying for it dearly. A servant fetched Grammy and I fashionable fur coats as Wolfe fired off another loud sneeze, before vociferously complaining about the cold weather.

"_Wheeeew!_ Shit it's _cold_!"

See?

Taurus sighed deeply, closing his eyes for a brief second to relish the weather, to savor the taste of the land that he had been born and raised. Just as the dry, arid heat of the dessert felt like an intrinsic part of my DNA, built and fortified within my bones, the cool, damp environment must have spoke of home to Taurus.

He turned to us, smiling with a touch of actual warmth his features usually lacked, "Welcome to the Aqualands kingdom. The limousine is awaiting our departure."

Sure enough a long, cream-colored stretch limo sat near the airstrip. I was surprised when the chauffeur was a Koopa of all things and fleeting surprise flickered on Bowser's features for half a second before his expression reset in its usual stern countenance.

The Koopa chauffeur bowed to the prince before opening the doors for Grammy and I. Grammy slid in wordlessly, and I made a quick mental note that she hadn't even thanked the chauffeur; Grammy was usually so gracious. I slipped into the limo, playing with the plush, fresh dark leather upholstery before catching sight of a complimentary bottle of sparkling cider, its glass bottle sparkling enticingly.

"_Ooh!_ Cherry Cider!" I picked up the bottle, beaming at Grammy, "Do you see any glasses Grammy? I'll pour you some!"

I turned to Grammy, completely surprised at the lack of gaiety. In fact, she didn't even respond, too busy glaring blankly through the window, thoughts trapped somewhere far away. I stopped grinning and spoke curiously, even slipping into Sarasalandian for an honest gauge of her feelings, _"...Grammy? Are you okay_?"

Before I could touch her shoulder, she spoke abruptly, "I'm fine, _Pichi_. Just thinking is all."

When she looked my way, it struck me how forced and strained her smile was, "I'm just not fond of the rain, that's all."

"Grammy—?"

The adjacent door popped open as Taurus slid in, with the other suitors piling in afterwards, laughing. Why were they all soaked? One moment it had been a thin veil of mist and the next it was raining so hard, it sounded like buckets of water were being dumped everywhere.

Taurus was laughing, hair and clothes damp as he took his seat beside me. The others rushed in, laughing wildly and for some reason, Wolfe was _completely _drenched. A large grin cracked across my face; How did he manage _that!?_Leave it to Wolfe...

I half laughed, "What happened to _you_!?"

Silver continued to laugh until his face was red, "It started to rain, t-to pour really and W-Wolfe thought it would be funny to s-soak King Bowser. S-So Wolfe kicked a puddle to get t-the king wet..."

"Okay...? So how then explain how Wolfe became _soaked_?"

The suitors held a shared amused visage—all except Wolfe—as Bowser barely smirked, "I kicked _back."_

"Really?" Zero was smirking, "That's _not_ how I remember it."

"And by 'kick'," Luigi laughed, "Bowser means-a he picked Wolfe up-a and _piledrove_ him-a into a puddle!"

I gaped, laughing as Wolfe's face flushed cherry-red. Puppo was on his shoulder, agitatedly shaking the rainwater from his fur.

"Yeah okay, like _that's _even _funny_!" Wolfe snapped, bangs drenched and sticking to his face in a rather undignified manner. Zero smirked, "He looked like a ragdoll, flopping around..."

"He got his ass _kicked," _Taurus whispered none too softly.

I knew it must have really been hilarious because Ryu—perfectly composed and _stoic _Ryu—snorted loudly, covering his mouth to hold in undignified laughter and that seemed to make everyone else burst into peals of laughter.

Wolfe blushed, frowning before he smirked wickedly and with a large, vicious shake of his head and the spinning of his long, sopping-wet hair, water was flung onto everyone in the limo. There were screams and laughter as I shielded Grammy, who finally laughed.

Taurus laughed, leaning forward to speak with the chauffer, "Off to the palace and make it quick. I'm trapped with these heathens back here!"

"At once, Prince."

* * *

><p>The rain had stopped—apparently on and off again rain was the norm here—and the horizon was clear. I gaped silently at the sight of the beautiful kingdom; the entire territory floated on clear, crystal-blue water. The Aqualandian capital city was filled with shimmering chrome towers and buildings that shone like the surface of liquid mercury.<p>

The citizens were shuttled to and fro with ferries, boat rides as citizens zoomed in their personal vehicles with hand-operated motorboats. In fact to travel to Prince Taurus' palace we had to take his own personal yacht.

As Taurus shared some history about his kingdom's fishing enterprises, we were served chilled beverages, delivered by the servants, all who I noticed were Koopas. _Does the Aqualands have a class system? Maybe even a caste system? Are all Koopas here indentured servants? Or am I making something out of nothing...I wonder if Bowser has noticed this..._

"Here's a refill milady," A Koopa troopa handed me a new glass of sparkling cider, "I noticed yours was nearly empty."

"Oh! What good service! Thank you!"

I went out of my way to give a generous tip. The Koopa troopa blinked, bowing gratefully and rushed off to fulfill other obligations. Luigi swished the contents of his drinks around, brows furrowed, "Uh, Daisy...have-a you noticed anything...?"

"You mean besides Grammy's low spirit?"

"There's that-a too," Luigi muttered. We both turned towards the furnished, spacious cabin; it was odd that Grammy had chosen to stay inside, she always loved seeing new sights and snapping pictures to fill her photo albums. I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed her melancholic behavior.

"The servants too," Luigi spoke softly, "...they're-a all..."

Wolfe padded over to my side, smiling widely and completely oblivious of our conversation, "This is pretty cool, huh?"

Luigi fell silent as I spoke, "Yeah, it's certainly nice."

"I think it's kind of chilly," Wolfe hummed, peering further into the distance, "I think I'm starting to catch a cold...I've been sneezing like crazy."

Puppo leaned over from his perch on Wolfe's shoulder and yipped, whining and pleading. I smiled at the tiny Chow, rubbing the spot behind his ears, "Aww, what does he want?"

"He just wants to try the drink for himself, here, have fun Pupster." Wolfe offered his drink to the tiny guardian on his shoulder and Puppo happily dispensed the bubbly beverage. "Don't you think this kingdom looks like a place mermaids would live? Who knew Taurus of all people would live somewhere cool."

"I must agree with Wolfesbane, this is quite a sight," Ryu appeared on my left, his red scarf trailing in the wind heroically. As he turned to face us, the weak sun lit his eyes and made me think of sapphire, "They hail this kingdom as a live Atlantis."

"Beautiful city, beautiful hospitality, what more-a could we want?" Luigi smiled.

"For Ry to stop being _so_ damn formal _all _the time_! Lighten up dude_!" Wolfe laughed, shaking Ryu good-naturedly, "Call me Wolfe! _Seriously!_ I'll crack your skull if you don't!"

Ryu arched a brow, just barely tilting his head in amusement, "Very well then _Wolfe_. I will refer to you as _Wolfe _if that's what you wish, _Wolfe."_

"Eww!" Wolfe laughed, causing Ryu to laugh as well, "Why did that sound so _weird _just now!? You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you just made a funny."

"Maybe," Ryu smiled enigmatically.

Taurus strolled over, making sure to stand nearest to me. He stood so close I could catch the subtle notes of his cologne, "Would anyone mind if I proposed a toast?"

"Not at all," Zero had his glass raised.

"Here's to a good day," Taurus smirked, lifting his glass.

We all said affirmations before clinking our glasses together. Just as we started to savor our bubbly beverages, a light mist of rain began to trickle onto our heads. Ryu tilted his head skywards, "...Hmm. I think I've detected a pattern."

"What do you-a mean?" Luigi asked.

One moment the mist was light and wispy and then it began to downpour in heavy deluges. The rain was so thick, I could barely see several feet in front of me. I cursed loudly as the suitors screamed mixtures of exclamations and profanities, Wolfe and Luigi laughed as Bowser made a show of standing _oh so_toughly through the crazy, capricious weather, not reacting at all.

Someone wrapped their arm around my shoulder and ushered me over to shelter. The second my back hit the wall, I saw it was Taurus; golden hair messy and drenched and completely unkempt for a change. He was laughing, peering at me with a smile, "You alright?"

"Yeah, this weather is crazy!" I laughed, "And I thought the desert was unpredictable."

He smirked, "I suppose we're both like our respective kingdoms; one of us is completely unpredictable, cool and elegant and the other is strong, tough and hot. _Real _hot."

My eyes widened as he smiled larger, something behind his silver eyes heated like cauterized metal. This was the guy who wrote those love letters to me, admiring the hue of my hair and the sparkle of my eyes. He was someone I had_never_ given a second thought to; was I wrong for doing such a thing?

I studied him with further interest and that seemed to make his smile grow. The second he was about to speak, Bowser stepped out of the rain and under a protective ceiling. He peered at Taurus with a stern expression, unblinking. Taurus turned to look at me and with a grin, shrugged.

* * *

><p>The palace stood in a myriad of tall, slender silver obelisks that pierced the sky. Again it struck me that the servants tending the gardens were Koopas. During the entire march to the palace's entrance, Grammy's expression remained closed.<p>

A light, sweet voice rose into the air, "Oh! _Taaaaaurus_? Is that my son!? My one and only son!?"

A slender slip of a woman in a fluttering blue dress exited the large golden palace doors and rushed over towards us with long, elegant strides. Her dress reminded me of a sparkling mermaid tail, glittering and even crafted to look like fish scales. Taurus laughed as the tall, willowy woman raced over, "Yes Mother, I've returned. And you look as lovely as ever."

Wolfe leaned in towards Silver and 'whispered' conspiratorially, "That's his mom? Heh, y'know for an older woman, she kinda has it going _on_."

Ryu must have caught that, as he turned to face Wolfe, eyebrows nearly touching his hair line as Silver gaped. Zero made a considering look as he studied the Aqualandian Queen, then nodded to signal his approval.

"_W-Wolfe_!" Silver sounded scandalized as Luigi laughed.

Though crudely stated, Wolfe _had _a point; she was a lovely woman, probably stunning in her prime. She had long, flowing white-blonde hair that fell to the middle of her back, a sparkling diamond circlet shaped like water droplets rested on her forehead and she had Taurus' same striking, crystalline silver eyes. She pulled Taurus into a hug, cooing; Taurus had inherited all of her beautiful features from the sharp, angular bone structure to the very same cutting silver eyes.

"Oh! My Taurus is back!" She cooed, rubbing his back and nearly squealing with glee.

"Must you miss me so?" Taurus laughed, "I was gone no more than several days!"

"And I missed my son each day he was gone!" She laughed happily, "The servants have worked to prepare such a great feast for your return! All your favorite dishes will be ready by supper; grilled salmon, curried shrimp scampi, fresh tilapia. I even had your favorite spirits imported. Nothing is too grand for my son!"

She smiled, still mewling as Taurus, maybe a tad overwhelmed by her open affection, tolerated it with wry amusement.

"I appreciate it all Mother, your enthusiasm brightens my heart," Taurus pulled out of the affectionate hug his mother was less than willing to release him from. He turned towards the rest of us, took the Aqualandian queen's hand and gently walked her over to us, "Mother, this is Empress Meringue and her lovely granddaughter, Princess Daisy of Sarasaland."

His mother's eyes narrowed a touch, there was a moment when she analyzed us both searching and calculating, trying to seek any visible flaws. When Grammy gave her a pointed, stern glance, the Aqualandian queen smiled, though it didn't quite reach her eyes, "Welcome Empress, I am Queen Gemini of the glorious Aqualands."

"Charmed," Grammy's unenthused monotone made a couple of the suitors pass curious glances at her.

Queen Gemini turned to peer at me and stared. The sweetness and warmth left her eyes and all that was left were frosted grey irises. She turned up her nose and studied me with no real interest. Her unfriendly stare had me reacting defensively; I narrowed my gaze, squared up my shoulders and stared her right in the eye, unblinking; it was something I noticed Bowser did when he meant business.

"_This_ is the princess for _my _Taurus?" She half-laughed, resting her hand against her heart as if in fear, "_My _son is handsome, smart and wealthy. I honestly expected _better_. "

A slow, building wave of anger manifested inside of me; first it felt like I had a migraine coming on and then I was glaring at her so hard, it felt like there was a flame scorching behind my eye sockets. My mind raced, trying to find the most diplomatic way to tell her that I was going to shove my foot up her ass, "_Excuse me,_ I—"

Grammy's visage grew more severe, "_Jue irrespetuoso!_ How unspeakably _rude_. Is _this_ how guests—how royalty—is treated within the Aqualands!? This is _the_ heiress to the Sarasalandian throne. You'd do well to mind your manners,_Queen Aqualands_. From what I've seen of the guests here in the Aqualands, they clearly have more manners than _you_. Perhaps you ought to ask them to teach you some."

Her biting tone and stinging words had some of the suitors struggling to keep straight faces—Wolfe _oohed_ quietly—as Bowser openly smirked. The flesh surrounding the Aqualand queen's prominent cheek bones flushed bright red with anger, "How _dare_ you speak to me in such an assuming, arrogant _manner_! Who do you _think_ you—!"

"Mother! _Please_," Taurus stepped between his mother and Grammy, "your comment was rude. I think it would reveal your sincere character if you apologized to Princess Sarasaland...?"

His mother sniffed, glaring at Grammy one last time before peering at me from beneath her jet-black lashes. She took a deep breath, as if reigning her temper before speaking in a strained voice, "My...apologies Princess Sarasaland, I hope you'll forgive me. But I suppose through ignorance of my own, I had pictured you looking a bit..._different_."

I raised an eyebrow. Different? Probably blond and fair, since that was the only mold princesses were allowed to be.

"No hard feelings," I replied through my teeth, to which she barely smiled.

"See?" Taurus peered between us, "All better now? Let's not have any hard feelings between us ladies. Please forgive Mother, she's just..._overprotective._"

The queen nodded, expression still tight, "...My dearest apologies. I can be a bit of an overbearing mother hen at times..."

"Don't worry about it," I tried to force a smile to my face.

The queen smiled briefly, "_Ah. _I see I was sorely mistaken. The Desert royal ladies are quite magnanimous. Shall we continue the tour? We have the most wondrous gardens, lakes, ponds, rivers, I think you'll have your breathe swept away."

With a graceful pivot, the Aqualandian queen began to lead us through several lush green gardens. Shrubs and bushes were modeled after varying aquatic life and starfish. We found the courtyard, quickly encroaching upon a giant, glinting golden statute that stood at the center. The suitors stared in awe and chattered among each other.

"Who's he?" I asked as Wolfe squinted, raising a hand to shield his eyes from the sun.

"Probably an ancestor," Ryu murmured softly.

"He certainly must be important if he's a statue," Wolfe hummed, mindlessly patting Puppo's head.

"This is King Pisces," Taurus spoke with a reverent tone, "My grandfather and one of the greatest kings of the Aqualandian empire. Though cold and aloof, he would spend hours looking over treaties and customs to ensure he could procure the best life for his people."

"That statue," Silver spoke in his usual soft whisper, "Y-You look remarkably like him."

Queen Gemini beamed with pride as Taurus grinned, "So you think? Odd isn't it? I look little like my father yet everyone likens me to him, strange how that works isn't it?"

I turned to Grammy who was boring a hard stare into the statue's handsome, crystalline feature. Her hard, unblinking glare left me cautious, "...Grammy?"

"Huh? Yes Dearie?"

"The tour's moving on..." I motioned to the group which was already beginning to head to the looming silver turrets of the Aqualandian palace. Ryu and Wolfe must have noticed our disappearance as they both halted in their tracks, turning half way to peer back at us.

Grammy smiled thinly, no true mirth reaching her eyes. She patted my hand before following after the others and as she passed Bowser, she gave him an affectionate pat on the bicep. I blinked after her, surprised. I managed to even catch Bowser's confused stare. He looked at me and shrugged helplessly, unsure of what to think of Grammy's odd behavior.

* * *

><p>The Aqualandian castle was filled with hundreds of golden statues: dolphins, sharks, otters, seals. Delicate, detailed oiled paintings of mermaids and merfolk swam across the high, towering dome ceiling. Similar to the heavenly Mushroomtine chapel, painted by the ingenious MichelangelToad, the painted merfolk swam across the expansive palace ceiling in a magical underwater universe.<p>

We studied the created wonder with awe, trying to memorize every last image, every last mermaid, every last seahorse; anything to remember the beautiful sight. The Aqualandian guards wore armor fashioned of scales and helmets adorned with fins. The palace was filled with multiple decorative pools of water and aquariums of colorful fish swam in the ceilings, walls and even the floors below our feet.

The sentinels ahead were stationed in front of a large golden door; their armor reminded me of a dolphin. They bowed before rolling the massive doors open. The Queen stepped before us, gracefully gesturing towards the newest hall, "Please come in. We've prepared a delectable, though very light luncheon."

Taurus pulled out a chair for me, bowing as I curtsied and took a seat beside the elegant queen. The moment everyone settled into their spot around the long table, the Koopa servants flowed into the room, meticulously arranging our cutlery and beginning to serve the first course.

"I must say, it is quite nice to have visitors," Queen Gemini cooed, "These courts are far too large for just a few royals to live in. Taurus simply _refuses _to settle down and give me grandchildren," she peered at the suitors around the table with interest, "So, these are the young men competing against my Taurus hmm? You all look like nice young gents."

She turned to Luigi and squinted, studying him closely, "You know, you look _quite _familiar...Do I know you from somewhere?"

"I'm Luigi Mario—"

"Oh!" The Queen snapped her fingers, "You're Super Mario!"

Luigi frowned, "N-No..."

"The treasure hunter Wario?"

"No..."

I could visibly _see _Luigi's ego shrinking by the second. The other suitors must have realized it too as Wolfe smirked and Zero hid too obvious laughter, "Oh! I've got it... You're uh...the tall man who usually wears purple. I believe you have a team in the Super Strikers Charged league, correct?"

I laughed dryly, "Waluigi? _Pass."_

"..." Luigi frowned.

Ryu cleared his throat, trying to be of assistance, "Your Ladyship, he's actually the youngest brother of the Super Mario brothers duo. He's also famous in his own right."

"Oh!" The queen blinked, "You're Mario's _brother_! Have you seen how Mario jumps!? It's quite remarkable!"

"Yeah...He _is _my-a older brother," he muttered despondently.

"I didn't know I was in the midst of such celebrities," the Queen smirked, "Well then, what else have we here? Where else do all you young men hail from? Don't be shy, let's hear all about you!"

"_Mother,_" Taurus sighed with exasperation.

"You _shush_," that made Wolfe laugh as the Queen sniffed indignantly, tossing her curtain of champagne blonde hair over her slim shoulder, "I wish to learn more of our guests, is that _so _wrong? That's_ rhetorical_ by the way. Now then, introductions please!"

With a sigh, Taurus leaned in and whispered, "You'll have to excuse Mother, she's...well, she's a bit of a gossip."

I chuckled, "So I see."

"I'm from Moonstone K-Kingdom," Silver smiled.

"Isn't it cold there?" The queen asked, "My, your hair is even lighter than Taurus'...And you're so pale..."

"Uh...Thanks?" Silver asked unsurely.

"I'm from Land's End," Wolfe beamed, feeding half of his salad to Puppo.

The Queen crinkled her nose and pointed, "_Ugh._ That little furry blue _thing _on your shoulder is eating from your _plate. _Don't worry, I'll have pest control here in a moment's notice."

Zero laughed as Wolfe looked completely appalled, protectively cradling Puppo to his chest, "_Hey_! He's _not _a pest! He's my _Chow_ and one of my best buds! If anyone tried to exterminate him, I'll exterminate them _first!_"

"Your _only _'bud'," Zero smirked, "And I'm from Sarasaland just like the princess."

"I hail from the Hidden Lotus village," Ryu spoke softly.

"It's been quite awhile since we've had Sarasalandians within our border," Queen Gemini spoke, her smooth voice floated over the table. She thoughtlessly tapped her long, turquoise nails against her wine goblet; first blue lipstick and now turquoise nails? Well, I guess an aquatic kingdom _would_ be infatuated with the color blue, "I've always admired the beautiful sun-kissed skin. And your hair, it is simply marvelous."

"Thank you," I replied; if this was her way to make up for her rude behavior earlier, then I'd try to accept the apology.

"I feel quite _awful_ for the ghastly way I treated you earlier, Princess Sarasaland," The Queen tossed her hair yet again, silver eyes narrowed to slits; I'm sure I've seen Taurus make that exact same expression, "It was completely unacceptable and brutish. To offer my personal penitence, I'd like to present you a gift. I hope you will like it, Dear."

The Queen picked up a bell and shook it gingerly. A Koopette scuttled in from another room and handed the object to the queen before exiting with a hurried bow. Gemini rose to her feet and set the beautifully wrapped gift into my lap, "Here you are my Sweet, I hope you like it."

"Thank you..." I studied the white gift embellished with a bright red ribbon before tearing into it with gusto. I pulled the boxes apart and produced a stunning Aqualandian party dress. It was ebony, textured to shine like the scales of a fish.

"What do you think?" The queen watched with bright eyes, her expression perfectly masked, "Do you like it, Princess?"

"It's...very nice, maybe even _too_ nice. Thank you Queen Aqualand," I smiled at the Queen who smirked, nodding her head.

"I'm glad you like it," Queen Aqualand tapped a manicured nail against her cheek in thought, "Such a pretty girl...I wonder...would yours and Taurus' child inherit your pretty red curls? That would be quite nice..."

Taurus's eyes grew wide before he choked on his beverage. Wolfe cut a sly grin his way as Taurus's face flamed with unusual color, "Mother, _please."_

"_What?_" she seemed genuinely stumped, "This _is _the same girl you've been _fawning _over for the last ten years or so! _Tsk_, don't you look at me as if I am being silly."

A red flag raised in my head; wait, _ten years!?_ I've only met him at the _Summani._ This caught everyone's attention and I was surprised when Taurus actually blushed_ flagrantly. _He turned to me, "There's...a _reason_ behind that."

"I _knew_ you were a stalker!" Wolfe laughed.

"Will you shut up for a change?" Taurus snapped, gaze darkening.

"I have to agree w-with Wolfe on this one," Silver muttered quietly.

"Since you all won't drop it," Taurus took a breath, "The Princess and I...We actually met as children."

I stared at him, "..._Really_?"

He smirked, "Indeed. We met once at a playground. And several years later...we were _supposed_ to have met but failed to."

"So why didn't we meet?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"..." Taurus peered away. I noticed his mother stiffened, "If you'd like to hear the story, I could tell you..."

"Then let's hear it!" Wolfe barked, "Let's hear how you—"

"_Alone,_" Taurus shot a meaningful glare at Wolfe.

I was curious as to how Taurus and I had met; had we been childhood friends? Did our Fathers have business together? Better yet, why had we not met up again when we were supposed to? "Yeah sure...I'll follow you to where ever."

I rose from my seat, excusing myself. I took my gift and followed Taurus to a nearby, quiet hall. The Queen turned to her last guest, "I'm sorry, I didn't get to learn where you're from—"

Her eyes immediately flew open as they landed on Bowser. The Koopa King smirked, "_Hey_."

The Queen's jaw unhinged inelegantly, "O-Oh my _Stars_. You're...You're..._You're_—_!"_

"King Bowser?" he was still grinning, "In the scales _baby_."

Since she was still gaping at him, Bowser winked. Gemini stared blankly, and before anyone could say anything, her eyes rolled in the back of her head and she toppled over backwards, fainting.

"Star damn," Bowser chuckled, looking too pleased, "I still got it."

* * *

><p>We didn't have to travel far to avoid the prying ears of the other suitors. We stood in a quiet hallway accompanied solely by long rows of Aqualandian armor and the hanging large blue and golden tapestries emblazoned with a royal family crest. I wasn't one to waste time and immediately dove in, "Taurus...You said we had met before? Before the <em>Summani.<em>"

He grinned, "Indeed we have."

I arched a brow, "Yeah...When?"

"You're currently twenty three years old, right?"

"Yeah, how old are you?"

"I'm three years your senior," he smirked, "So when we first met, you were four and I was seven."

"Okay...?"

"Our Fathers were actually good friends," Taurus smirked, "We used to have several play dates together, but I see you were far too young to remember me."

I certainly couldn't remember him. The earliest memories of my childhood involved playing with the Mario brothers, Peach, and Zero mostly. Nowhere was there a page of Taurus in the book of my memory.

"So if our fathers were friends, then why did we stop playing together?" I asked.

"There's a story to be told," Taurus laughed quietly. His expression became slightly more sober, "Anyways, a little background about my Father. He held the epitome of pride for his kingdom. He was a fine ruler and gave generously to his people. Perhaps his generosity was great enough to have been his downfall. When I was but a child, Father and I had been traveling to a neighboring kingdom for business and a herd of bandits...hijacked our limousine."

My head shot up, and I turned to look at him, "I was barely nine at the time. The hostiles had thoughtlessly slit the driver's throat before me and thought _nothing_ of it...they had thoughtlessly shed blood before a child's eyes..."

"My _Stars_..." I whispered.

"The bandits took us to a temporary shelter and held us hostage; it was sweltering hot, we were thirsty...It was hell. They threatened Father, and promised if we didn't meet their demands, they'd inflict harm upon me."

"Do you even remember what they were demanding of your Father?" I asked.

"No, I do not...Certain parts of the story I think I even willingly blocked out," Taurus shook his head, jaw clenched, "Well, I surely learned that Father was noble to a flaw. The bandits threatened my health and yet no matter how much harm they promised upon me, he valiantly claimed 'do your worst! Royalty does not fraternize with low-lives.'"

Taurus took a rattling breath, "The bandits...They were malicious and had done just as they promised. They made me suffer untold horrors."

My heart dropped as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. Taurus closed his eyes, brows pinched above his nose, "They had abused and starved a child. And Father had..._allowed_ it, simply because he was 'above' dealing with them. They were cruel, had unflinchingly inflicted such agony and pain upon a _child._And there were days,_ days_ I would scream until my voice was hoarse but through it all, Father had not even spoke with them _once_."

Taurus' silver eyes had grown eerily withdrawn, as if he was no longer physically present, "It felt like an eternity before the Aqualandian special forces came. They killed the bandits and brought me back to Mother's teary sobs and warm arms. That day had changed us all; ever since Mother had been sorely overprotective and I admit, though it's been years, I...have _never_ been the same. Something...twisted and cold took root within my being and I've...never been...the same."

"So what happened to your Dad?" I didn't speak above a whisper.

He fell silent, fists clenched, "The bandits had wounded Father perilously. After being rescued he had died hours later, though he claimed he was happy to have gotten one last chance to have seen mother's fair face... _That,_ Princess Sarasaland is why we had stopped having our playdates. My Father had been murdered and our Fathers' friendship had been prematurely shortened."

I chanced a look his way, "Why...didn't you tell me this? Things could have been different between us, we didn't have to fight or hate each other..."

Taurus grinned, "Contrary to what you believe, I never hated you."

"Yeah _okaaay,_" I rolled my eyes with disbelief as he laughed, "And you were a complete _ass _at my _Summani."_

Taurus smirked, shrugging noncommittally, "My apologies. But would you have believed all of that if I spewed it?"

"I don't know," I said softly, "But I guess it does explain why my kingdom is so determined to have me...wed you..."

"Is that so?" Taurus purred with careful consideration.

"It may not mean much but...I'm sorry," I whispered, "For what happened to your Father..."

He shook his head, the light caused his hair to glow like molten gold, "We all have our struggles. But just know. Ever since those days with the bandits, I've learned to crave power and to take everything I want. No matter the cost, and no matter what extremes I must take to achieve it."

"And what do you want?" I asked, tilting my head, "Do you want our friendship back?"

He turned to face me completely, vitality and life back in his mercurial irises. He gently touched my chin and spoke in a purr, "Oh Princess Sarasaland, you haven't the faintest clue as to how determined I am to make you mine. Come hell or high water, I _will_ have you. I just...need to get things in order first. Though...I do have one place I wish to take you this evening."

"And where's that?"

He laughed, "I have a night club I'm quite fond of, would you like to go? I have things _planned _for this wonderful evening. Besides, you can put Mother's beautiful dress to use."

* * *

><p>The rest of the day we had toured the palace, learning about its foundation in the late thirteen hundreds and the rumors and folklore of how the Aqualandians were direct descendants of mermaids. It was about to be nightfall when I began to dress for my night out with Taurus.<p>

"_Ugh_! Is it _supposed_ to be this _tight_!?" I gasped, feeling the uncomfortable squeeze of material that was _far_ too tight against my middle.

Grammy furrowed her brow, sticking out her tongue in concentration, "Here, suck it in a little."

"Grammy! That's just it! I don't have _anything _to 'suck in'!" I groaned.

With much struggling, Grammy and I fought viciously, tugging and yanking the party dress far more than I'm sure the designer had in mind for their expensive, slinky black dress. It was a battle to pull the dress over my hips—which was _frickin' _ridiculous because I was nowhere near the sensuous realm of being curvaceous—and with one last sharp upward yank from Grammy's determined digits, I was able to finish dressing.

The dress stopped several inches above my knees, and the matching black pumps I had already tripped in twice made my legs look miles long. Grammy stepped back, both brows raised with unspoken approval, "Oh...You look nice! And here I thought that Prince Taurus fellow would have you looking like some sort of a tramp!"

"_Grammy_..!" I laughed.

"_Oh m_y! And what have we here?" Grammy's brows rose to her hairline as she placed her hands on her hips, "Who are _they_?"

"They?" I blinked cluelessly, "They _who_?"

"_Them._" She grinned, laughing quietly as she pointed to the middle of my torso, "Since when did my little _Pichi '_bloom'? Starting to get some nice _cupcakes_ I see..." Grammy's hands moved from the jeweled necklace and playfully patted my _chichis._

My mind flushed out all logic and sense, crashing violently like a relic computer as I gaped stupidly. Grammy burst into a mirthful peal of laughter as I gasped, nearly stumbling backwards. Thoroughly embarrassed, I covered my precious _cupcakes_ as I bellowed, "_Granna! _D-Did you _really _just say _that!?_ And d-did you just _feel me up!? _Can't you exercise s-some kind of tact!? _My Stars_!_"_

My face was still sizzling like open-flame kabobs and Grammy did nothing but continue to laugh like it was the _funniest _thing in the world! I snarled, angrily stamping my foot and nearly losing balance in the process.

"Oh calm down, _Pichi,_" Grammy smiled, "You look nice. _Too _nice for Prince Taurus."

Her smile softened, "Look...I want you to have fun tonight, but I also want you to stay safe, alright? Stay near King Bowser...?"

"Alright. I'm carrying the Flash Tonic Junior gave me, on my person just in case too," I muttered quietly, trying to read behind the lines and find sense of her ambiguous wording, "What will you do while we're at CLUB VICE?"

She smiled with a cutting ruthlessness that made me double-take, "Something, I've been dying to do for years."

* * *

><p>"If I h-had known we were going out, I would have dressed nicer," Silver muttered, fiddling with his shirt.<p>

"It's fine," Bowser huffed, "Compared to me, you all look like _crap_ anyways_._"

"..." Ryu and Zero both turned and arched a brow.

Puppo whined at Wolfe, squeaking and wiggling and baying his protests about being left behind. Wolfe sighed, "Aww_, c'mon_ Pupster! This is one of the few times I can't take you somewhere with me."

Puppo bayed loudly :_Puppo wanna go! Wanna go! Wanna go! Wanna gooooooooo!_:

"I know Bud," Wolfe sighed, "But I'll only be gone for a few hours okay? Daybreak tops."

:_If you no take Puppo! I'll pee! Puppo will pee right on meany human prince's foot! Sound good?_:

Wolfe laughed, before brushing a gentle hand through his Chow's blue fur, "Sorry pal, can't do it...even if it _is _tempting...You know what? Why don't you watch over Grammy for me, okay? She's been kinda sad this whole time and no one knows why."

:_Puppo will watch! Will watch over nice Peppermint Queen lady_.:

"Good boy!" Wolfe turned to Grammy, handing over the small Chow Puppy. Grammy collected Puppo into her arms, blinking up at Wolfe who spoke in a surprisingly tender voice, "You'll take good care of him for me, right Grammy?"

"Of course I will," she smiled, "Looks like Puppo and I are going to take a pleasant stroll around the castle, as long as you don't mind Prince Taurus."

Taurus waved it off, "Suit yourself Empress. Maybe you and Mother should take a stroll together?"

"It's alright," Grammy smiled, "I'll go with Puppo."

"Alright then. Please stop by and view the waterlilles. They're quite exceptional this time of the year."

Taurus placed a hand on my shoulder before smirking, "You look stunning Princess."

"Thanks," I smiled.

"To get to CLUB VICE, we must travel below the water's surface. Let's all head for the submarine."

Luigi and Silver's eyebrows shot up, "A submarine!?"

"An underwater club?" Zero rubbed his chin, "Not bad..."

"Come," Taurus motioned, "Let's go. Dinner, a show and a wondrous night awaits us."

* * *

><p>Taurus's personal submarine—yes, he had a <em>personal<em> submarine—had traveled underwater where a whole other world seemed to exist below the water's surface. An entire underwater metropolis thrived, where submarines and underwater shuttles zipped by like cars and buses. There were even bright, sparkling lights and glowing buildings. When Zero asked about the electricity, Taurus explained the science behind hydroelectricity and being able to harness water to generate a constant power source.

That and the utilization of phosphorescence, something that deep sea creatures like bloopers, giant cheep-cheeps and calamari were able to use to glow naturally. The subamarine—properly titled Water transport—traveled to a garage that swallowed it whole like a gigantic steel trap. We watched with no hidden amount of awe when the air-tight enclosure slowly drained of water completely.

The doors to the submarine opened, allowing our disembark. We stepped through another air-locked tunnel, one with an excellent view of the underwater city and the misty glow of the shimmering lights. Taurus herded our pack towards the sound of booming music. A large line of people were already wrapped around the corner and it was only eight pm. There were so many glittering sequin dresses, pinstripe shirts and mile-long legs in tight miniskirts and killer, towering stilletoes.

"...A-Are we underdressed?" Silver whispered to Ryu.

"It sure seems that way," Ryu laughed, "I'm not sure if armor is fashion forward."

"You _twerps _might be underdressed, however," Wolfe boomed. He playfully shoved past them, strutting with a confident amble, "A Canine is _always _dressed to party!"

"Really?" Zero smirked, "The only thing I got from your ensemble was being homeless."

"You can't bust my balls!" Wolfe laughed, arms akimbo "'Cause they're _steel!"_

Bowser and Luigi snorted loudly, with the former doubling over with laughter. Though smirking, Bowser shook his head, "Can we just go to the club before Dog-boy says something even more _dumb?"_

Zero nodded, "I second that."

Taurus smiled, offering his arm to me, "Ready, Princess?"

I wrapped my arm within his, smiling, "Yeah, let's go."

We cut through the line, passing through the heavy crowd. Heads turned, peering in a direction with marked interest. Whispers rose in hushed decibels, eyes trailing after our group with critical, discerning eyes. Taurus walked to the bouncer and offered nothing more than a smirk before the bouncer stepped side, "Welcome back, Tar."

"Thanks, Big," Taurus peered down at me with a grin, "Shall we?"

Somewhere behind us there was a loud squawk, "_Hey!_ Let us through _you jerk!"_

The bouncer narrowed his stare, "Are _you _on the list? You're kind of funny looking."

"Your _face _is funny looking!"

"You ain't comin' in."

Wolfe threw his hands in the air with an incredulous look, "Is this guy for real or _what!?_ You just _saw _that we're with Taurus. Don't be an idiot!"

"You get to go in, if you are actually with him," the bouncer stated.

The bouncer may have let us in, but he immediately blocked the other suitors from pursuing. I laughed, realizing Bowser towered several feet above the beefy bouncer. In fact, the guy eyed him warily, unsure and maybe even paranoid about facing a Koopa _that _big and _that _mean-looking. Bowser was glaring him down, eyes narrowed and an ominous frown darkening his visage.

Wolfe suddenly grinned, wrapping an amicable arm around Bowser's shoulder, "I'm sure you've met my friend...? How about I give an introduction? Big, mean, buff Koopa wearing bad-ass spikes, meet the bouncer who's about to get his ass _kicked_."

If Taurus was concerned, it certainly didn't show up in his expression. He barely peered over his shoulder at the suitors, "They're with me. Let them pass."

The bouncer stepped aside, ignoring the glares from Silver and Luigi with relative ease. Though he wisely took a step or two back when Bowser made a move to enter the club, passing by and making sure to send the bouncer a departing heated, prolonged glare.

Wolfe followed after Bowser with a large, cocky grin; just to piss off the bouncer I'm sure. And while he was bursting with laughter, Wolfe's grin sifted into something downright wicked as he flipped the guy off.

CLUB VICE was a clamoring, multi-tiered haven filled with wreathing, gyrating masses, bursting popular music and illuminated sensuously with the bright burn of rainbow fluorescent lighting. The club had different translucent floors, each lit with different, distinguishing colors and themes. One level was a five-star restaurant, it glowed with rich, sensuous cherry-red lighting and the floor above that was a frosty cool, neon blue glow. It was a lounge where patrons could kick back, chat and enjoy the expensive bottle service and mingle.

Our floor was the base, aglow with frosty white lighting. There were glittering neon lights, beautiful women dancing on glowing podiums in slinky dresses and the bar glowed white in a welcoming halo of cool lighting. The masses danced around the dark dance floor, swaying and grinding to the sounds of blaring popular music.

Taurus led us to the glowing bar, and as he went, associates and friends acknowledged him with friendly pats on the back or even a friendly quick exchange that lead to refined laughter. After speaking to one last friend, Taurus lightly tugged on my arm, stopping at the bar. He leaned over to whisper into the attractive barkeep's ear. Whatever he told her set her aglow. Smiling and flushed pink, the barkeep began preparing drinks in a whirlwind of motion and swinging blond hair.

"I kinda want to dance!" Wolfe yelled, he pushed and shoved until he was beside me, "Hey Daisy! Wanna dance!?"

He even began to bounce, swaying and snapping his fingers to the beat. The sight of his growing wicked grin and molten golden eyes only promised fun and mischief; I don't know how the Canine Clan boogied but something promised that Wolfe's antics would probably get us kicked _the hell_ out of here.

Heh. Sounds fun. I'm totally game.

"_Please_ don't embarrass yourself Wolfe, they don't do the kangaroo bop, or the drowning wallaby, " Zero chuckled.

Wolfe stopped dancing and turned to shoot Zero a dry look. Once Taurus received his blood-red beverage, he raised it into the air, "A free round from me. Drink well."

As he smoothly sipped his beverage, the club roared gleefully as patrons rushed around for their free beverage. As they passed, men shook his hand, patting his shoulder as women winked and blew kisses his direction. Taurus leaned forward and whispered into my ear, "And what's your poison beautiful?"

"I don't have any preference. How about something that isn't too strong?"

He grinned before signaling the barkeep over, "Could you make my lady a Dirty Redhead on the rocks."

"Right," she chirruped.

As the smooth melody of music played, the barkeep swayed her hips. After pouring three different concoctions into a glass, she pushed the drink forward. I lifted the beverage and I shouldn't be surprised that the 'Dirty Redhead' was a deep cherry color. I raised the glass to my lips and took a precursory sample.

It was yummy, sweet with a hint of cherry and the unmistakable burn of alcohol was present. Taurus shot a charming grin my way, "So what do you think of the Dirty Redhead, Princess?"

I arched an eyebrow, "Not bad! it tastes pretty good!"

Ryu was busy trying to discern his beverage, even trying to hold it up against the dim lighting of the club as Silver, Luigi and Wolfe spoke amongst each other. A patron who had been standing nearby, minding his business was suddenly flung across the club with a pitchy shriek. I blinked, realizing Bowser appeared by my side, standing e_xactly _where that nameless patron had stood prior.

I blinked, "Did you just _chuck _that guy across the club for no reason!?"

Bowser snorted, "He was standing too close. Besides, _I _wanna stand here."

_So he did just unapologetically throw someone across the room for no good reason..._

My mouth hung open but I immediately snapped my jaw closed; a princess wasn't supposed to gape stupidly. Bowser looked disgruntled, holding a shotglass that was far too tiny in his large digits. This made me laugh.

And since the club was raucous, lively and the music was blaring omni-directionally, just to speak with him, Bowser had to almost completely hunch over so I could speak into his ear, "What kind of drink do you have?" I beamed up at him.

"Some kind of shot," he sighed, glaring languidly, "This won't even be enough to get _Junior_ drunk."

I shot him an incredulous glare, "_Please _tell me you have never given him anything alcoholic!"

Bowser smirked, "Yeah, once I gave that lil twerp _juuust _enough to knock his ass out for the night. That'll teach him for _crying_ about the boogeykoopa."

Appalled I snapped, "_Bowser_!"

He boomed with laughter, grinning so large I saw the entire top and bottom row of his sharp fangs, "Geesh Flower! I'm _kidding!"_

I rolled my eyes, "Well...At least you don't have a Dirty Redhead."

His eyes flickered with interest, "A what now?"

I raised my voice over the music, "A Dirty Redhead."

Simultaneously a few guys peered in my direction with interest. Male eyes roved over my frame as I blushed. Bowser raised a hand to his ear, "Huh? A what?"

"_A Dirty Redhead_!" I shouted.

The men chuckled, smirking. Bowser grinned, "I _know_ you are."

I snapped my jaw shut, glaring as he chuckled.

"Gee _thanks_," I hissed, cheeks pinks, "Now those three _idiots_ over there think I'm talking about myself."

He arched an eyebrow, "What idiots?"

He bent over so I could talk in his ear, "Three guys, nine o'clock."

Bowser looked in the prescribed direction and found the unwelcome leering stares. His expression tightened, a sneer on his face before a rare stoicism smoothed over his features.

"I got this," he said all too eagerly.

A large hand latched onto my shoulder as I was snugly pulled against his plastron. Bowser smirked, lightly touching my face before markedly shooting a glare in their direction. He gnarred loudly, with the left side of his lip peeling back into a fierce snarl and baring a row of sharp incisors.

Stars, he could have melted all the snow off the Frappe mountains with that glare. Anyone with half a brain wanted nothing to do with a pissed, buff eight foot-tall Koopa. Startled, the men froze; their petrified faces were funny, you could almost hear them cry, '_Mommy_!' One by one, they turned away awkwardly, pretending to find interest in something else.

I laughed, burying my face against the cool surface of Bowser's plastron, "Stars you scared them _stupid_!"

"Serves 'em right, sometimes the studly alpha male has to let the betas know their damn places," he grinned, pulling me closer, "You're _my _dirty redhead and that's that."

Let it be known that I'm very glad for the dark lightning. It blanketed what would have been an all too obvious blush, "Hey! I-I'm _not_ dirty!"

"_Ah,_" he purred, wagging a finger with an amused grin, "but you didn't deny you're not mine."

His wild grin grew sinister as I made a pitchy squeak, "Erm...T-That's 'cause...w-well..."

"You know, I think I want a taste of the dirty redhead," he licked his lips suggestively; Stars was that really necessary?!

"T-The drink? O-Or..?"

He chuckled pleasantly, arching an eyebrow, "Oh I think you _know_ which one I want..."

He leaned forward, fangs gleaming in a wicked smile as he inched closer. My cheeks burned, heart racing as the bass of his flirtatious purr grew louder. He was inches away when Wolfe darted forward, muscling his way through the throng of people with frothy mugs in hand, "Hey! There you guys are. We were looking for ya princess!"

Bowser growled angrily, eyes nearly ginger in color. He grabbed Wolfe by the collar and shook him, "I have _plans_ here and you're ruining them! And when someone interrupts _my_ plans, they usually get their ass roasted or punched out!"

Wolfe blinked, "Huh? What are you talking about King B?"

"Don't call me that!"

Bowser huffed, lightly shoving Wolfe away. The Canine alpha brushed off Bowser's odd behavior with a shrug. He turned to me and grinned with one of his usual infectious smiles, "Hey there D! There's my favorite girl!"

I laughed, "Hey Wolfe!"

The other bachelors appeared, cocooning around us in an open half circle. Taurus materialized by my side, motioning to a barmaid. The slender blond cut into the middle of our circle, balancing a tray filled with bubbling, frothy brews. Zero accepted his beverage, wordlessly studying the barmaid's slender build with cool detachment. The suitors each grabbed a beverage for themselves.

"Did you bring the special for the king?" Taurus asked.

"Of course."

Bowser arched a brow, "What's the special?"

"It's a brand new drink introduced on tonight's menu," the barmaid smiled.

Wolfe frowned, "Hey! Why didn't we get _that_!?"

"Because you're _you_," Taurus half laughed.

Bowser rolled his eyes, plucking the special beverage off the tray and studying it's deep blue coloring.

"A toast gentlemen," Taurus had some kind of bright, apple-green martini in hand, "To a fine evening with you gents and a beautiful enchantress."

"Oorah!" Wolfe whooped.

Glasses clinked and the boys threw their heads back and drank. Bowser drained his entire mug in one shot; ah, I see the skills learned in college will always stay with some of us! I sipped my drink daintily, smiling at the line of stray, bubbly froth dribbling down Wolfe's cheek. Ryu studied his drink with a closer glance, "So this is your alcohol?"

"What do you think of it?" Wolfe smirked, "Ever had some cold ones before my Shinobi from another mother?"

"I-I always preferred wines m-myself," Silver admitted softly.

"Yes, we have a type of liquor created from rice. It is called _sake_ and its flavor is subtle and satisfying. So this is the 'beer' I've heard so much about? Never had it before," he looked at the glass thoughtfully.

I smirked, Of course he hasn't had a_ drop_ of beer. He could lose those _gorgeous _abs if he drank that stuff. The bundle of suitors stilled, and I immediately peered up, realizing the guys were staring at me with varying irritated expressions. Bowser and Taurus appeared the angriest, Wolfe nearly crushed the beverage in hand as Luigi and Silver were floored, gaping. Ryu remained perfectly nonchalant and though he lightly sipped his beverage, even under the dark club lighting he was clearly _smirking._

Why would they all...?

_Oh sheyt_.

I was horrified, cheeks bursting with color and blistering heat, "I-I-I...said that _aloud_...didn't I?"

"So tell us what you _really_ think," Zero deadpanned, a brow arched with what I could assume was dry amusement.

I laughed nervously, face burning under the condemning, choleric stares I received. Bowser's antagonistic stare had enough intensity and heat to burn holes through the thick stony hide of a Thwomp. I quickly polished off my drink to save face. Bowser angled his glare at Ryu before staring elsewhere as Silver pouted. Even Wolfe had a darker expression, golden eyes faded into an obscure honey color. Wow, they _reaaaally _didn't take too kindly to that...

Hehe..._whoops..._

"He's not all _that..._" Wolfe frowned, pouting in a rather immature voice. Emotion flickered in his eyes before a sly grin curled onto his lips, "So...You think _he's_ awesome? Ha! Well...I...I've got _sexy abs_ too! See?"

And of course, right in the _middle_ of a crowded club scene, he shamelessly peeled up his shirt over his torso to prove it. Half of the suitors gaped as Zero actually bust up laughing.

_BAM!_ I beheld the sculpted abs _galore_, worthy of the glory of a Greek statue. Oh _Stars_. The Canine warrior lifestyle of training and fighting had ripped him up. His stunt was beginning to attract attention and interestingly enough women were double-taking in his direction with heightened curiosity. Wolfe grinned largely, knowingly and even was a tad smug as I gaped like a fool.

"Act like you have some damn sense," Bowser shoved the Canine heir none too gently, though not unkindly, "The princess clearly does _not_ want to see your undeveloped, _prepubescent _body."

Silver laughed, politely trying to hold in his laughter as Wolfe frowned, "Hey! I am _not_ prepubescent!"

"My eyes are _enflamed _from your lack of sex appeal. Keep your shirt on kid, you're scrawny as hell," Bowser smirked, clearly enjoying Wolfe's flaring temper.

"You wanna step outside and handle this like men, _Bowsie-poo_!?" Though Wolfe spoke a threat, his humorous tone and wide smile weren't missed at all. Bowser cuffed him in the back of the head as Wolfe returned a playful nudge to his plastron. I can remember when once upon a time, Bowser and Wolfe seemed to bump heads with one another all the time.

"I have a better idea. Instead of lewdly stripping in public, how about we go to our VIP section," Taurus transitioned as smoothly as ice into Luma bourbon, "Entertainment and fine dining awaits. Shall we head there?"

"Sounds good!" Luigi bellowed, over the loud music, "I can-a barely hear-a myself think!"

Wolfe laughed, shouting loudly back, "You have to be able to think first, Weegeeman!"

"If that isn't the pot calling the kettle black!" Zero laughed.

Taurus smoothly slipped an arm around my shoulder. We met eyes—in which I received a sultry grin and a quirked brow—as he kindly ushered us on to our destination. In my peripherals I saw Bowser stiffen.

* * *

><p>None too happy, Bowser followed after Flower and her pathetic band <em>of love slaves<em>. He hid it well but Flower's little stunt back there had_ really_ pissed him off. She had always admired that damn Shinobi but he didn't realize Flower drooled over him _this _badly. Anytime that damn Shinobi peered at her, she melted into a boneless, quivering soup.

What was _so_ amazing about that guy _anyways_?! He might have been 'ripped' for a human but compared to his utterly masculine, Koopa physique, that damn Shinobi was _puny_. But really, since when had Flower been _so infatuated_ with this loser!? There was nothing even remotely impressive about him.

As they moved through the crowd to head to CLUB VICE's VIP lounge, the bright red tail of Ryu's scarf caught the king's eye. That damn Shinobi was right in front of him. How easy it would be to simply snap the frail buttons of his spinal column. The king's claws twitched, as if stimulated from the thought of snapping his spine. Red eyes narrowed predatorily, scrounging the Shinobi's unimpressive form for what Flower could _possibly_ see in him.

He was 'tall'—by human standard although Bowser found him ridiculously _puny_—supposedly attractive—again Bowser thought he looked frickin' _weird_. Dreamboy had inky, wild dark hair that seemed to make his blue eyes bluer. Flower seemed to like that he was quiet, but Bowser suspected it was because Ryu was probably a closet _pervert_.

As Bowser continued to bore holes into the back of the clan leader's head, the sloping planes of the Shinobi's broad shoulders blurred unexpectedly, like an unadjusted microscope going out of focus. Then everything else around him blurred into indistinguishable blotches as well. Bowser blinked, impatiently rubbing his eyes to get some kind of gunk out of his eyes.

The king squinted harder, finding it odd that his vision didn't improve. _Must have gotten something in my eyes. They don't sting or anything. Weird..._Club patrons distorted and twisted into ambiguous blobs as the bright colors of the neon lighting dripped and smeared like swirls of paint.

The world began to sway and rock as if the ground beneath his feet morphed into the deck of a wayward ship. Bowser was surprised when the ground tilted violently and the neon burn of the fluorescent lights blurred into soupy bright blotches of nothingness.

To regain his fleeting balance, Bowser stopped moving altogether and squinted against his impossibly blurry vision. The Koopa King failed to notice the ever growing distance between him and the suitors as the last tail of Ryu's red scarf disappeared in the crowd.

"Wha...?" he asked dizzily.

Bowser swayed precariously and as the world took a sudden lurch, he stumbled into a bystander. The human was sent to the floor, spilling his drink onto his expensive coat jacket. While the angry patron swore creatively, Bowser blinked, trying to see straight.

"Whoa, my bad," was that his voice? It sounded so distorted and far away, as if he was having an out of body experience.

"Stars, the _hell_ is wrong with you?" The human male snapped, "You _fucking_ Koopa are so rude."

While things may have been hazy, the insult registered as obvious and as jarring as a neon sign that read, 'Bowser is a sissy with a small schlong'. And he did _not_ have a small schlong. Bowser mustered up a half-decent glare and squared up his shoulders, "The _hell _did you just say to me you little punk!? You wanna step outside and handle this, _human_!?"

In the face of a bigger, stronger antagonist, the angry patron's tune changed capriciously and any remaining shreds of respect Bowser had for the sycophant vanished into thin air.

The blurry human even raised his hands in a placating gesture. Bowser's nose was assaulted as a sudden thick flood of salty, sweaty fear pheromones saturated the air, "N-No i-it's alright, Bud. Let's not do this. There's girls around, okay? Just be more careful huh? Y-You're a big guy and all..."

"_Tsk. Wuss_," And with one intentional, well-aimed shoulder-thrust into the irritating human's soft, fleshy side, Bowser pressed on after...

Wait, where did that damn Shinobi go?

And why was everything so damn blurry!?

_What the hell was going on!?_

"Whoooooa, you alright, Big fella?"

A hand steadied his weight with surprising strength. The fresh scent of tree bark and grass let him know it was that loudmouthed Dogboy. Wolfe stared up at him with worry, brows pinched together at the bridge of his nose, "You okay King B? You look like you're kinda shaky on your feet."

Under the low-lighting, Wolfe's golden eyes glowed like a feline's irises. Something about his yellow eyes made him think of the eyes of Koopa; his irises flickered in the light like those of a nocturnal predator.

"Did you know you're swaying on your feet?" Dogboy spoke again, frowning, "You okay? You certainly don't look too good...And you smell different...like a chemical."

"'M fine," Bowser's slurred speech most assuredly indicated the direct opposite was true. His tongue seemed heavier, as if it were made of lead and he felt inexplicably drowsy, "I think...I drank som'thin' weird. Ah...Feel funny..."

"You had a beer right?" Even Wolfe's features were starting to blur together, "Wait, didn't you have that new drink...? Ugh, yeah you reek some really gnarly chemical. I wonder...?"

"Find..." Bowser swayed, grimacing as he tried to fight against vertigo, "Fuhwer...I prumushd thuh quen...I...wud pruteck...Fuhwer..."

"Find _who_?" Wolfe sounded puzzled, "You need help Bowz, let's go—"

The fog in his head grew thicker and condensed like heavy cream. His head swam and Bowser was sure he was floating. It didn't feel like he had legs anymore, or that gravity worked, "No...Find...Duhsay."

"_Who?!"_

The fog continued to thicken, to coagulate and clot, dragging his mind into a deeper, darker abyss. He was barely conscious as a thickening rim of darkness blackened his vision, "Dushzy...Duh..._zee_."

Golden eyes squinted,"..._Who?_!"

Even half conscious, that was enough for Bowser to feel vestiges of anger, "I sed find Duhzee yuh _dumbazz_..."

Wolfe gripped his hair in frustration, "Argh! I_ can't_ understand you! Come on, let's get you to some place safe. Out of this noisy, sweaty club. It's weird."

Just then, several suits shoved past Wolfe, one even discreetly bludgeoned him in the back of the skull with a concealed weapon. A spray of white stars broke before the Canine's eyes. The world spun violently as Wolfe's vision grew dark. He grunted, toppling over like a set of dominoes. The Canine's sudden spill attracted nearby attention and that was enough for the suits to unnoticeably drag away the incoherent king. They clutched his arms and with the aid of seven men, guided him away from the scene.

* * *

><p>A couple of club goers had seen the Canine heir spill over with a frightening, boneless lifelessness. Onlookers crowded around in tightly condensed clots, peering around one another in hopes of seeing the felled person.<p>

The world whirled in a sluggish sluice of color and incomprehensible blather as Wolfe slowly became aware of the world. Like sand straining through an hour glass, so did his conscience slowly slip into the present. He finally realized someone was shaking him into semi-clear consciousness.

He blinked, head swimming, vision foggy and ears ringing loudly as the blurry images gradually became unambiguous. The back of his skull throbbed with such monstrous pain that it made the back of his eyes burn.

A handful of CLUB VICE bartenders were peering down at him, worry etched in their features. Wolfe felt something cold press tenderly against his forehead and blinked languidly at the unknown faces staring back.

"Thank the Stars you're okay," an older male bartender spoke gravely, white brows furrowed with concern, "How do you feel young man? Can you understand us? The medics are on their way."

"_Oh my Star_s," a young Bartender gasped a rattling sob; her trembling white palm pressed against her mouth as if to hold in a scream. Her voice shivered, distorted and was thick with emotion, "I-I thought you were _dead_. You fell and I-I was so scared!"

"Rest easy, we called the medics, they'll be here soon."

Wolfe blinked at them, wondering why the back of his head smarted; did his Ma wallop him a good one for forgetting to put the Chows in for the day? Couldn't be, and why were a bunch of blonde, pale people staring at him with worry?

_That's right, I'm in the Aqualands...and all Aqualandians are blonde..._

The female bartender pressed the icepack to his forehead tighter, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I wonder if that Koopa had anything to do with it. He was standing right behind this kid."

_Koopa?_

The word stirred up a sudden, painful explosion as recollection shot to the forefront of his mind. Wolfe jolted up so suddenly, he nearly headbutted the poor female bartender. She staggered backwards with a yelp as the other bartenders tried to coax Wolfe into relaxing. Wolfe remembered the suspicious group of suits, the only people in the club who hadn't been smiling, the odd scent of metal on them and then a burst of pain. And Bowser? Where was Bowser?

He staggered to his feet, ignoring the ominous spinning vision or how lightheaded he became. Wolfe grit his teeth, holding the back of his pounding head, "_Sucking shit_ that hurt...Wait! Where's Bowser!?"

When he pulled his hand away from the back of his shaggy head, a smear of blood glistened on his palms. He swore roughly, staggering, stumbling and shoving through the crowd as he tried to get to his feet, "_Bowser!"_

"Hey! Sit down! You're hurt!"

"Calm down! You might have a concussion!"

A group of Aqualandians tried to restrain Wolfe, but they were no match for his brute Canine strength; he had once wrestled and hogtied a ten foot piranha with nothing more than his bare hands and a coil of rope. Dragging along several measly humans was nothing. He grew impatient with their efforts to impede his progress and with one quick brusque tug, they were flung away.

A couple of the bystanders approached, "We called for help."

"Slow down! You have a concussion!"

"Concussion!?" Wolfe called back, still traveling in his mad rush, "This is _nothing_! Ma punched me once for backtalk, now that, _that _was what you would call a Star damn _concussion_! I woke up and thought I was a canary for_ three__days!_"

A comforting hand was placed on his shoulder, "Settle down. You should really relax, you're bleeding."

The barrage of curious questions faded to black as Wolfe searched furiously, head on a swivel. He knew something was _terribly _wrong and tried to push through the crowd, but the Aqualandians pillowed around, clogging his way. He may have been leagues stronger but they had sheer number on their side. Wolfe growled, backing away from the intrusive, yet helpful strangers. "Wait! Let me through! I gotta get to my friend..._Bowser_! Hey! Can you hear me dude!?"

"Settle down, security probably escorted him out, he looked plastered."

It quickly annoyed Wolfe with how they tried to speak to him calmly; he was in a rush, "Your friend is _that _Koopa, right?"

Another soothing droll, "Your friend's okay, he was just drunk. Just rest, you need medical aid."

* * *

><p>"Come with us King Bowser."<p>

If he had straight vision, the king would notice the men were dressed in perfectly starched, crisp dark suits and completely perfectly straight faced.

"...Wulf?" His tongue was heavy and he could barely see.

The frantic shout was muffled and far away, "_Bowser!_"

The Koopa king stumbled, head swimming viciously as he was led off. His feet moved with no true direction or purpose, he wasn't even coherent enough to realize a set of people were guiding him along. The blaring club music was distorted, colors and people blurring into fuzzy splotches. Vaguely he could hear Wolfe's voice, raised in a panicked shout but even that made little sense.

He was too indisposed to realize he had been lead outside, away from the glamour and elegance of CLUB VICE and into a dark, grizzly rundown back alley. The air stank of pungent garbage and refuse. The guiding hands released him, and as his only grip of equilibrium left, the world tilted again. Bowser's head spun as he lost his balance and fell over, lying flat on his back.

By then he barely knew his own name. A group of blurred figures hovered above, eying him with the same diligence a murder of crows would show their prey. Their faces and expressions were too blurred for recognition, "Is it sedated?"

One of the men moved over towards Bowser and shone a bright flashlight dead in the eye. The Koopa king's red eyes were clouded, swimming, and nowhere near predatory.

"Stars," one man crouched down, "Never been this close to a _lizard _before. Sure is one big, ugly sonnovabitch isn't he?"

"Of course he's big, he's the king of them. Don't you know anything about the animal kingdom? The alpha is always the biggest, strongest one."

"Well king _lizard_'s drugged pretty well. Had to use nearly half of the drug to put him out," a cigarette was dragged deeply, a wink of orange faint against the sleek shadow of night. "He won't give us much trouble."

"Stars, have you ever seen a bigger _lizard_? It's absolutely huge."

"The prince said he wanted to teach him a lesson. I can't think of better hospitality."

"What about that long-haired savage back there?"

"The Canine boy?"

"I hit him hard enough to disorient that mouthy Neanderthal."

A shroud of soft laughter blanketed the cool air, "Then let's show King Lizard here some good ole Aqualandian hospitality."

Under the streetlights, the blade of metal knives glittered in a flash of cool light. The blotchy, dark shadows circling above head drew closer, like death coming in for the kill.

"Let's find out how tough this lizard bastard _really_ is," the voice spoke lightly, as if speaking of something trivial like the weather, "Prince Taurus would appreciate if you stayed away from Princess Daisy. He sent us to_ personally_ send you his regards."

There was laughter as the group began to savagely beat him, kicking and punching any part of him they could. But it wasn't enough, one thug dropped to a knee, thrusting the thick blade of his weapon into the flesh of Bowser's arm. The drugged king grunted, muscles tensing as the knife cracked scaly hide and peeled away in broken chips.

"Stars, his hide is made of fuckin' rock."

The knife dug, twisted and plunged until a squelch of dark liquid stuck to the Hitman's gloves like sap. His labor came to fruition as tender pink muscle was unveiled.

* * *

><p>The VIP longue was absolutely breath-taking: luxurious, modern and beautiful… It was littered with classy black marble tables and hosted by droves of beautiful Aqualandian women. We were served bottles of wine, vodka and merlots that were worth hundreds of thousands of coins. Our dinner was the finest cuts of steak, fresh seafood, lobster, shrimp, scallions, fish; mmm, it was delicious.<p>

Taurus leaned forward, whispering against the shell of my ear in a seductive, dark purr. _You look stunning. _He must have seen my blush as he laughed warmly. With a curved smirk, he tilted his martini glass my way, offering a sip of his Aqualandian Cristal. I took three dainty sips and savored the sweet, smooth beverage. I was in a magnanimous mood as I even took him up of his offer when he asked me to dance.

By the time the suitors finished dinner, the beautiful servers cleared away our plates with expert proficiency. But in all this, where was Bowser? Or Wolfe for that matter? They just missed a fine meal and great bottle service.

"Anyone-a seen Wolfe or Bowser?" Luigi nearly mirrored my thoughts verbatim.

"What's odd," Ryu spoke over the rim of his wine glass, and under the dark lighting his eyes appeared black, "is that I'm sure Lord Koopa was right behind me. I thought he followed us."

"S-Should we go look for him?" Silver asked.

"They're probably still enjoying the club," Taurus smirked in my direction, "after all, CLUB VICE has been voted as one of the top clubs for ten years running now."

I nodded mutely; perhaps Bowser was out in the club scene, he did love extravagant parties and the flashy nightlife scene. But I thought he'd rather spend his time with me...

Truthfully I felt a bit...jealous.

"Some more sparkling turquoise elixir, princess?" Taurus offered, holding up the bottle.

"Oh, um...Yes please."

He topped off my drink and again we clanked glasses in a toast. After small talk and delicious dessert, an entertainer approached the stage, "Ladies and gentlemen, it gives us great pleasure to have you in our club. Tonight we would like to entertain you with a special presentation."

We clapped politely as the lights dimmed. Prince Taurus leaned towards me, whispering into my ear, "I know you shall especially like this presentation Princess."

I raised both eyebrows, peering at him with a small smile, "Really?"

"Oh yes," he smirked, silver eyes shining like alloy.

I turned forward to face the stage. The dark curtains slowly pulled away and a magician in a top hat was revealed. With a large flourish, he bowed to us and removed his hat. Ooh I wonder if this performance will be a magic show? I love magic and trying to figure out the magician's tricks!

With a snap of his fingers, a swirling blue cloud of dust covered the entirety of the stage. As the swirling smoke cleared away, the performer was now standing behind a large, silver box. The magician glided his hand over the box mysteriously, swaying to the soft music as he moved.

"He's gonna make it disappear!" Luigi whispered.

"No, h-he's gonna make a Goomba p-pop out!" Silver whispered back.

The magician covered the box with a long red velvet sheet and before the blink of an eye, the sheet was ripped away. In lieu of where the box once was, there stood a steel cage. The crowd cooed happily, clapping. There was a faint chirrup. Ryu turned to Luigi, eyes tight, "Did...you _hear_ that?"

Lulu was busy burying his face in the scrumptious dinner. When Luigi looked up, he had butter smeared on his cheek and had a lobster tail hanging out of his mouth, "..._Gufh_?"

Ryu arched an eyebrow, "...Nevermind."

"Ryu, did you also hear that sound? It was like a squeak..." I spoke.

"I did," he muttered.

"Where did it come from?"

Ryu's eyes hardened as he turned and looked at the stage, "I hope I'm _wrong_ but I think it came from the..."

I froze, was it from the cage? The magician turned the cage towards the audience and inside was a baby Koopa troopa. While the adjoining court crowd oohed, my mouth became dry from dread; what is...going on here?"

The poor Koopaling was tiny, he couldn't have been any bigger than Junior. He shivered, wide eyes looking around as he chirruped and squeaked his dismay. For a horrifying moment I saw Junior behind the cage, frightened and crying out for help. My stomach churned uneasily.

"_My Stars_..." Silver gasped, horror awash on his face, "T-There's a Koopaling infant in there!"

Luigi finally stopped eating and looked up. His jaw dropped when he saw the tiny Koopaling behind the bars. I was stunned; if a human child was kept in a cage for public amusement then it would be seen as inhumane and cruel. But the culture was different here. There was a skew caste system within the Aqualands were Koopas were subservient.

But...were the Aqualandian people willing to overlook the obvious cruelty because the victim was a _Koopaling_? I was shaking, rage broiling at the sight of the scared Koopaling. He was shivering and scared and yet no one was stopping this spectacle. The magician waved his hands and out of thin air materialized an object. I blanched; _it was a whip_. As the performer approached the cage, the Koopaling backed away.

As the toddler backpedaled, he toppled over his own footfalls recklessly. The crowd laughed at the pathetic display. The Koopaling squealed, stuck on the back of his shell and helpless as the magician approached. I froze; No. This was_not _going to happen. What I'm seeing was _not _real.

The bachelors looked unsettled. I turned to Ryu and grabbed his arm, "This...this has to stop! Ryu, stop him or _I'll_ do it!"

Ryu rose halfway from his seat but indecision froze his limbs. I couldn't hesitate. I couldn't sit here any longer and do nothing. I rose from my chair but Zero grabbed my arm, meaning to keep me in place.

I spun around, eyes hot with anger, "What are you _doing?_ We have to stop this!"

"Princess," Zero spoke, tone perfectly neutral, "we're in a foreign kingdom. If we try and stop this, we could very well offend the citizens, Prince Taurus or worse, the Aqualandian government. And we're here to mend relations. Is it_really_ wise to offend the Aqualands as we sit within their borders?"

I halted. Silver frowned, "H-He has a point princess..."

"Offending the prince, the people could very well lead to imprisonment," Zero spoke seriously, "Or _worse_, a termination of our alliance. Do you want that? Do you want our people to have no waters in our wells?"

"I can't just sit here..." I whispered, struggling with inner conflict.

I peered around at the other VIP patrons who laughed deeply; the people in the audience were laughing at this cruelty as if it were a comedic performance. I turned to look at Prince Taurus and was revolted. He was sitting in his chair perfectly content, arms crossed and a ruthless smirk upon his lips.

I peered at my suitors: Luigi and Prince Silver watched with obvious horror as Ryu had his arms crossed and eyes narrowed. Zero simply watched the entire spectacle with disinterest. I was fed up with everything I saw. I bent over and spoke to Prince Taurus.

Zero frowned, "_Princess..."_ He warned.

"No! I can't sit here and let this happen!" I turned to Taurus, "Stop this! You make this stop _now_!"

Although I was yelling, I could barely hear myself over the crowd's laughter. My building fury grew even stronger when Prince Taurus looked at me. His silver eyes were perfectly cool, as if he had planned this spectacle from the being.

"Hey _seloh_," I snarled, "I said to cut this _sheyt_ out!"

"Why?" Taurus purred elegantly, eyes bright with wicked amusement, "This is simply entertainment. No one is being hurt."

"No one's being _hurt_!?" I hissed furiously, "That's bull sh—"

"In _our_ kingdom," a sinister smirk crawled onto Taurus' cold, angular face, "This is nothing more than entertainment. Unlike Sarasaland or the Mushroom Kingdom, this treatment in perfectly legal. In our kingdom, this is how our caste system works."

"That Koopaling doesn't deserve that! No one does!" I growled, "Human, Koopa, _no one_! Not Bowser and he's the king of Koopas!"

"Bowser? Is _that_ what you called him?" That seemed to finally grate on Taurus' nerves and dulled his good humor. The prince sat up straight, posture rigid and silver eyes narrowed, "My, how _informal _you are with that beastly _lizard_."

"He is a Koopa, not a _lizard_!" I snarled, slamming my fist against the expensive table top.

"_Whatever_. A monster is still a monster. But you are so _painfully _informal with him. I'm rather curious as to why you know him so well.

"Let me make one thing clear," my voice was slowly rising in volume as my anger boiled, "Bowser is not the monster!" I snapped, jabbing a finger at him, "_You are_!"

I didn't realize the atmosphere around us was beginning to quiet as other club goers were beginning to take notice of commotion. Luigi was standing, clapping and nodding his head, "You're-a jerk!"

I was trembling with rage; how _dare_ this awful _seloh _call Bowser a _monster_ when he himself was the true evil being. Bowser would never hurt a kid, human or Koopa and when Bowser did fight a foe, he'd want someone that could fight _back_. He specifically targeted Mario because it was a fair fight that way.

And these Aqualandian citizens who could take such mirth in watching a living, breathing, creature being mistreated weren't too much better than their monarch. The door to VIP tore open with a thunderous bang.

A symphony of gasps rose as Wolfe burst into the room with one well-placed kick. He hunched over, hands clutching his knees as he raggedly drank in air. A mental red flag shot up as I realized spots of blood dotted his tattered clothing. An open cut on his left cheek slowly dribbled a tear of blood onto his blue tribal tattoo.

Wolfe's bedraggled appearance had most of the suitors rising to the feet and most of the VIP patrons fell silent, murmuring quietly to one another. Taurus couldn't hide the sneer on his face fast enough. Or perhaps he just didn't try.

"_Holy Stars_," Silver whispered, eyes wide, "W-What's going on?! A-Are you okay Wolfe!?"

"Foul play's afoot," Ryu whispered, his hand smoothed over a pouch I'm sure held a weapon, "What happened Wolfe? Better yet, where's King Bowser...?"

Luigi and Silver walked over to Wolfe's bent form, steadying him and helping him to his feet. When Wolfe peered up at Taurus, eyes burning and teeth bared in a furious sneer, my breath caught in my chest; I had_ never_ seen such unyielding fury on his face. Wolfe who was always so easy going and good natured, able to laugh at himself even was truly furious. His golden irises burned as if fire ignited beneath his eyelids.

"You _bastard_!" Wolfe roared animalistically. He jerked forward, unearthing a wild snarl as he charged unmistakably straight for Taurus. Wolfe staggered, cursing and growling and struggling as Silver and Luigi restrained him with difficulty. I'm positive the only reason Luigi and Silver were able to hold him back was because of his injuries. While they restrained Wolfe with great effort, Taurus watched the entire spectacle, unblinking and completely indifferent.

"Daisy..." Wolfe managed to snarl between his teeth. He was so furious he shrugged his shoulder out of Luigi's grip, "This _jerkass_ had an ambush set up. Taurus had some guys hired to beat the shit out of Bowser."

Luigi and Silver gasped as the entire floor fell silent. The club patrons fell silent as unguarded surprise even flashed across Ryu's face for a fleeting moment. I froze; all feeling and rational thought dissolving from my being.

_What?_

"Bowser...?" My voice came out in a frail whisper. No, no, no. He can't be hurt. He couldn't be hurt. He was _Bowser_. He was the strongest being I know. He wasn't hurt. He couldn't have been hurt. My hands began to shake as my heart punched against my chest at irregular, frantic intervals.

Wolfe exited the room and after several moments of gauche silence, he returned, grunting as he slowly dragged in a lumbering, half-conscious...

_No. No. No. This wasn't real. This wasn't really happening._

Bowser was barely conscious, completely unaware of his surroundings as his head lolled lifelessly and body sagged limply as Wolfe shouldered his massive frame. _No...Stars this can't be happening..._

His eyes were bruised, swollen. He was battered, bloodied with jagged, bleeding wounds that spilled down his form in dark rivulets and his shell was crusted with filth. My heart dropped, blood fluming in cold streams as I took in his injuries. At the gruesome sighting of Bowser, most of the VIP patrons began to slowly filter out. Most couldn't hide their shock as others turned their heads away from the brutal display.

"No..." I whispered, voice trembling, eyes growing damp, "Oh my Stars, _Bowser._.."

"_Kuso_," Ryu whispered.

There was so much blood...He looked as if he'd pass out, as he tilted unsteadily on his feet, slumped completely against Wolfe. His quivering, labored breathing was the only true way I knew he was alive. Something inside of me snapped, and a flood of emotion hit like a typhoon.

"_Bowser!"_

I darted forward, trying to push past all the unimportant nameless faces and bodies to get to my friend. Someone strong gripped my arm, holding me back and restraining my mad dash forward. I struggled and fought, cursing, "_Let me go_! I...I have to see if he's okay!"

_"Deiji," _a soft, soothing voice purred against the shell of my ear, "Calm down. You cannot help the king as you are. Panic will make things worse."

"But...he's hurt!" My voice broke, distorted from emotion and tears.

"I know it's difficult," Ryu's soft, placating tone didn't change, "But he'll need you to be strong. I know you can do it."

I tried to relax, taking several deep breaths to calm my frantic nerves. I calmed just enough to get Ryu to release his hold on my shoulders. I didn't know how long this tranquility would last because Bowser looked as if he would keel over in a moment's notice.

"These bastards had him drugged," Wolfe spat fiercely, "He barely even knew who he was. I found them using knives! They were trying to cut through his _skin_! I hope they can't eat right after how badly I kicked their teeth in!"

"Here, hold him steady Wolfe," Silver spoke in a surprisingly stern voice, "I'm going to give him a Mushroom. And when we leave here, I'll give an a Red Essence. It should temporarily restore his strength."

"Here, hold him Weegee," Wolfe growled, "I'm about to go over there and bash Taurus's head against a wall."

"I-I can't hold him!" Luigi nearly shrieked as Bowser's deadweight began to slowly fold him like an accordion, "_H-Help me_!"

Wolfe sighed with thinning patience, but quickly bolstered Bowser's massive weight as Silver forced a half-conscious Bowser to swallow a Mushroom. I walked over to Bowser, trying not to sob, trying to be strong as Ryu recommended, but second by second it felt like layers of my strength were being sloughed off.

I couldn't believe it. These assholes had _brutally_ attacked my best friend. I cringed, noticing the blood dripping down his arms, trickling down his plastron and legs, soaking the floor. I took a hold of his limp hand, hoping he could sense I was there. "...Taurus, you did this didn't you?"

I needed to hear it from the mouth of the source. We all turned to look at the prince and everything about his expression remained harshly unmoved. His features were stony, completely uncaring and I already had my answer.

"You _did _this to him..." My voice was a dodgy whisper.

Taurus' expression didn't falter, "I would _never_ harm another monarch."

Someone not too softly declared 'bullshit' and I'd have to agree. Well actually, Wolfe yelled it.

"You_ disgust_ me Taurus," I snarled, "You think you're better than Koopas? Well you're dead wrong! It's obvious they aren't the monsters here you are!"

"I've seen enough," Ryu spoke, anger lacing his cool voice, "this is cowardice at its finest. If you had a vendetta with King Bowser, there were other honorable ways to have settled it. I will relieve you of the Koopaling."

Bowser moaned weakly, eyes fluttering as Silver tried to manually feed him a mushroom. Though terribly wounded, Bowser still had some kind of will to remain stubborn to the bitter end, turning his head and weakly refusing help, "I know it's hard and I know it's painful," Silver whispered, "But it will make you feel so much better, King Bowser once you digest this..."

As Ryu approached the stage, one of the few remaining Aqualandian citizens blocked his path for a confrontation. The Shinobi heir didn't bat an eye, if anything I thought he was looking beyond the person. Ryu turned to us, "What will we do with the Koopaling?"

Luigi shrugged, "Dunno, he can't stay-a here. Maybe Bowser can help him when he's better."

"Hey!" The Aqualandian standing in front of Ryu was furious that he was being ignored, "Jackass, I'm _talking _to you!"

"Bring him to Sarasaland, maybe we could call Lord Bowser's advisors," Zero suggested.

"_Hey!"_

"Is that alright with you, Princess?" Ryu asked me.

I really didn't care, "Yeah..but maybe you should...pay attention to that guy standing before you..."

_"Hey!"_

Ryu turned half way to look at him, blue eyes completely uninterested, "...Yes?"

"You're no better than that _lizard _you foreigner. Take your ass back to where ever you came from."

"I don't care what you think. Step aside," Ryu intoned without emotion.

Indignant, the rude Aqualandian bellowed, "_You_ _step asid_—"

As Ryu glided past, ignoring the rude club goer, the Aqualandian reached out to grab Ryu's shoulder. And without breaking stride, Ryu twisted the mouthy jerk's arm with a satisfying crunch and promptly discarded him with a kick that launched him into the opposite wall with a loud bang. Luigi and Silver's jaws dropped as Zero laughed.

As the unsuspecting Aqualandian wreathed in pain, Ryu leapt onto the stage with a fluid, soundless grace. The magician wisely—and hurriedly—removed himself from Ryu's path and immediately the Shinobi leader began to examine the locked cage with the Koopaling peering up at him curiously. Ryu reached into his weapon's pouch, producing a pin and began to deftly pick the lock.

I turned to glare at Taurus, "From this moment on, consider my engagement to you broken. I want _nothing_ to do with a prince—no—a _man_ like you!"

"You will _regret_ those words Princess Sarasaland," he spoke softly, "this entire circus stunt even. I invite you into my kingdom, show hospitality and _this _is how you thank me? By insulting my fine citizenry and our magnificent culture?"

Silver scoffed. "Do not use your culture to justify cruelty."

"Or being a punk ass!" Wolfe snapped.

"And your pasta _sucked_!" Luigi shook his head, as if completely disgusted, "Never-a have I been so_ offended._"

"Then perhaps you ought to see your way out of here fast," Taurus smirked, eyes narrowing, "It is not wise to be in the midst of an enemy territory now is it? Consider the Sarasaland-Aqualand water treaty _nullified._"

_Shit._

Zero shook his head and released an impatient snarl; it was as he predicted. What have I just done? Sarasaland and the Aqualands were already on a very rocky, neutral relationship with each other, but now that I have insulted their prince, I have destroyed something very important.

The Aqualands was Sarasaland's main source of water for our wells. If this stunt just destroyed our neutrality then our trades with them were done. _What have I done? What have I done to my kingdom!?_

"This is unnecessary Prince Taurus," Silver spoke, voice stern, "You may have think you've won, but we're going to remember this. What you've done here has not only affected Sarasaland, but it has impacted the Aqualands negatively too. We of Moonstone will remember this."

"Your true character has been revealed today," Ryu stepped beside Wolfe and Bowser as he held the Koopaling tot in his arms. Ryu peered at me, his severe expression softening marginally, "I do agree with Taurus for once and think it_is_ time we departed from here, Princess. We should collect your grandmother and leave these borders as soon as possible."

Taurus took a slow, calculated step towards me and immediately my nearby suitors stepped between us, as if creating a tangible physical barrier. If such an action bothered Taurus, it was well hidden. He was smirking, silver eyes glinting in the darkness, "I consider myself a generous man. Perhaps Princess you would like to talk about this matter some place more private? Think about it. Do you _really_ want to leave here with a tarnished trade agreement?"

I grimaced; he was right. I couldn't leave as enemies. I couldn't let the Sarasalandian people suffer drought; it was the same as allowing them to die. I couldn't let it happen. I barely realized when Zero spoke, "I'm insulted, Taurus. You must take us as fools to allow that. As declared enemies we will not allow you to speak with our princess."

I turned to future high councilor, "Zero, you yourself said Sarasaland would be completely disenfranchised if we lost them as an ally. I can't...leave things how they are now."

"Perhaps," Zero replied, "but Taurus has proven he can't be trusted. This is no longer personal, we've always known Taurus hated the Koopa King, however this attack on King Bowser could now potentially sour _our_ personal relationship with the Darklands. There are now a multitude of political factors we must look into."

I looked at Bowser, "How is...he doing?"

"Okay all things withstanding," Silver frowned, "The sooner we go, the sooner we can better treat him."

I swallowed the lump in my throat, "Guys...You won't like this but I _have_ to reason with Taurus."

My suitors gave incredulous looks.

"That's the direct _opposite_ of what we said to do!" Wolfe balked incredulously, throwing his free arm into the air.

"Sarasaland needs water, _badly_. This has been the worst drought in fifty years," I spoke aloud and not to any particular person, "I...I _need _to do this for the sake of my people. If things don't work out, at least I can hold my head up tall, knowing I did my best to secure a relationship with the ally."

Zero titled his head, chocolate eyes narrowed, "...If that's how you feel, then be no more than five minutes."

"_Dude_!" Wolfe exclaimed, glaring dubiously," She _can't_ go with him! Look what he did to Bowser! Look what happened to _me! _You're _supposed_ to be smart and logical. And right now you're _not_ being smart and logical!"

"I _am_ being rational," Zero faced Wolfe, his expression perfectly unconcerned, "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few: if we leave now with our treaty broken, millions of Sarasalandian citizens will die from drought. It could even incite riots against the monarchy. Our choice is clear: Princess Sarasaland _needs _to bargain with him."

Wolfe was conflicted, grinding his teeth as indecision weighed heavily upon his shoulders.

"I know you all don't understand," I sighed, "but this is something I _must _do for my people. Zero...You especially should know how much we need water. And if we leave now, Taurus—_the Aqualands_—will nullify our agreement."

"We could help you too," Silver piped up suddenly, "Moonstone Kingdom has tons of snow and I'm sure we could ship hundreds of gallons to Sarasaland."

"Please don't go with him, Babe," Wolfe sounded desperate, eyes bright and vulnerable, "Let's just get the hell out of here."

It felt hard to turn a deaf ear to them all. The pleading stares and worry shone in their eyes glaringly. But this was something I _had_ to do. I had to put the crown before my own personal feelings. Someday I'd be queen and this was just the start of making decisions for the betterment of my people.

"Hey if I'm not back in eight minutes, feel free to come for me," I laughed, trying to lighten up the atmosphere.

"You've got_ five_ before I intervene," Ryu replied sternly, eyes cold.

Right. I've got five minutes before Ryu opens a Shinobi-flavored case of whoop ass. When I turned to follow the prince, I shot one weak smile at the suitors. And that last smile broke the last of Wolfe's wavering self-control. His stern expression contorted into worry, desperation even and immediately he darted forward, "Oh _hell no_. I'm not leaving her alone with that bastard."

He lurched forward only to be restrained by Ryu. Wolfe snarled, "Dude _let go_! He's going to hurt her! He's going to hurt the girl I lo—_like!_"

"She has to do this," Ryu replied stoically, "And this is just as difficult for me as it is for you."

Taurus motioned me to follow and even when we left the VIP lounge, I could still hear Wolfe's troubled shouts as Ryu and Zero tried to calm him. We barely walked out of the room and into a barren hallway before Taurus rounded on me. My breath caught in my chest as the prince loomed too near. He was grinning, pale eyes bright and scorching in a way that made my stomach churn uneasily.

"You haughty little girl," he whispered. Even though his words were cutting, he seemed fascinated, "Think you can insult me and get away with it? No strings attached?"

"I don't care!" I snarled back.

"You know why we're both here," his smooth voice contained a growl behind it, "My kingdom—no—it is _I_ who controls the export of water to your inferior, Star forsaken people. You've really managed to insult me princess. I ought to cut your kingdom off and enjoy the show when your useless subjects die of dehydration."

He suddenly grabbed my shoulder. When I went to move away, he crushed his fingernails deeper into my skin. Taurus licked his lips before he spoke in a whisper that could have been perceived as gentle, if one ignored the true scum he was, "Let us not pretend that you are naïve nor ignorant, princess. I know that behind those big eyes, you have a fairly capable brain. Or at least enough neuron power to understand how incredibly _ruined_ you have made your people."

I stared into his face, close enough to notice every small detail about him; the haughty features, the glowing entitlement in his eyes. I was close enough to feel his breath upon my face. Prince Taurus certainly was blessed with an angelical face, one that was sure to have charmed plenty of royal ladies; a straight nose, striking eyes, and a strong bone-structure. It was a mirage, all that angel, all that pretty was to craftily cover up the true devil lurking beneath the surface.

His granite-gray eyes cooled as his voice floated into an even softer whisper, "Imagine the horrors. You know very well that you can't care for your people without the Aqualands treaty. Without our trades your people will die by the dozens. Hundreds, thousands..."

I was hard-pressed to admit he was right. Even with the Aqualands supplying seventy-five percent of our water, we were still in a terrible drought. Without the Aqualands, what would we do? _We'd fall into ruin._

"And no matter how much Emperor Sakuro begged me for forgiveness," he was smiling now, "I would not listen, even if he came here personally and licked the soles of my feet."

I tried to pull away from him, "My father would _never_ lower himself to such a position. Not even in your dreams should you see him doing such a disgusting thing!"

Taurus laughed; it was a refined, charming sound, "_Oh no_, I wouldn't want _him_ to do the begging anyway. It would delight my heart to see the crown _princess_ of Sarasaland grovel _desperately_. It would be pleasing to see such a proud, stubborn creature beg."

I glared at him incredulously, "_What!?_"

"You want to keep our trade agreements, don't you? Don't you wish to have your people's basic needs taken care of?" his whispers were deceptively sweet, laced with a venomous poison, "Then the only way I shall forgive this atrocity is if you _beg_."

My face hardened, "_No_."

"Come now _Daisy_, must you always be so difficult?" he purred, eyes straying from my face and hovering upon my mouth, "Very well then. If you find yourself too proud to plead...Then perhaps you could…do _something_ else to convince me."

I sighed angrily; it _always_ did come back to money, "How many thousands of coins do you...?"

I snapped my mouth shut as the hand on my shoulder slowly descended towards my waist. I froze, halting as his fingers hovered over the bows at the back of my gown.

"Water is the source of all life. Without water there is no food, no drink. Think of the catastrophe a desert kingdom will face with dry wells." he was smirking as he whispered, "Now then princess, if you wish to save your people, then you shall beg for _a kiss_."

I shook with ill-suppressed rage, fists balled up, "How _dare_ you…"

I felt a soft tug at the back of my dress and gasped as the ribbons came undone. He moved a hand back to my shoulder as I stared at him, absolutely shocked that he would even show such open disrespect.

"If you wish to save your kingdom," he was laughing now, laughing as if threatening my virtue was all a big joke, "then I've got a couple of ideas of what you could do to...persuade me _otherwise_."

The bows had untangled and I felt the front of my dress become loose. With a snarl, I snatched my arm away from him and with all the force I could muster, I punched him in the face, remembering every technique Ryu had taught me.

"_Seloh_!" I snapped, cracking my fist against the side of a prominent cheekbone.

As he staggered from the recoil, his hand dragged across my front and ripped the fabric across my shoulder. The dress hung awkwardly now and in a mixture of embarrassment and fury, I spat at him, "You're disgusting! A dirty, filthy_seloh_!"

"Well then," He tried to play of the blow as nothing, but I could see the way his cheek was beginning to bruise and I know I had decked him _good._ Silver eyes blazing, he wiped his mouth, "consider our agreement terminated."

"_Good_, Sarasaland shouldn't deal with such trash anyways."

I stomped away angrily, not wanting to be in his presence a moment longer. I heard him call out to me, "But don't think this is over princess. One way or another, I _will_ have you and you _will_ beg for me. Just as your Grandmother begged for my grandfather."

I halted, "_What_?! What did you say about my _grandmother_?!"

"About fifty years ago, your Grandmother had slept with my grandfather," he grinned hellishly, eyes wild, hair mussed and teeth bared in a crazed smile.

"No..." I whispered darkly, "She'd _never_ do that!"

"Oh it's _true,_" he snarled, grinning madly. His busted lip shone red like a raspberry, "Fifty years ago the wells had run dry in Sarasaland and desperate, Queen Meringue—or was she a princess then? Anyway, your grandmother had come crawling into my grandfather's court _weeping_ and _begging_ for _mercy_."

My mouth opened soundlessly before snapping shut.

Taurus barked out a rough laugh, "To fill up the wells across the desert she slept with him. Meringue must have been a terrific _lay _if he refilled all the wells and then sent a bouquet of roses in addition!"

A cold wave of horror flooded my being; _no...that wasn't true...it couldn't have been true..._

* * *

><p>Meringue approached a towering golden statue, eyes cold and sharp as icicles. She held a steel pipe in hand—'borrowed' from one of the Aqualandian palace's interior decorations—in hand, staring up at the statue of King Pisces. It was a golden image of him as a young man, a perfect capture of him at the prime of his life when had been handsome and strong. He looked just as he did when he had taken her.<p>

He had been twenty eight and she a mere sixteen years.

A _child_.

Plum lips uncurled as white teeth were bared; this bastard wasn't good enough to have his grave defecated, but this would certainly make her feel better. In the end he had died a miserable old man, hunched over, brittle and decrepit from the ass-kicking time gave. He died as the kind of man who never slept well; his multiple enemies and capricious wealth plagued him the entirely of his miserable existence.

He had gone blind in one eye, inky and clouded with a cataract. As lascivious as ever, even at eighty-five he had married a beautiful girl _Daisy's_ age. It was disgusting. Amusingly enough while he laid on his deathbed, Meringue laughed hard and long when she heard his 22-year old '_wife'_ walked out of the marriage with_ half_ of his wealth. The young harlot didn't even have the tact or character to have waited until after he was dead and gone.

Meringue tightened her grip on the pipe, staring at the golden face of her tormentor. Puppo glanced up at the queen, whining softly.

"It's okay boy," she muttered to the tiny chow, "Stand back."

As Puppo backed away to give the queen her space, Meringue glared at the statue, testing her grip on the pipe. Maybe at sixteen she couldn't do this, but at seventy six she could do it with a bad back _and_ achy joints.

_This is for all those terrible things you did to me._

With a roar she crushed the base of the statue.

_And for all the vile, dirty things you whispered to an innocent, scared girl._

She swung, this time smashing his legs.

_And for giving me night terrors for years._

She broke clear through his left arm.

_And for stealing my maidenhood._

She bashed the statue's temple. Somewhere in her rage-filled haze, she heard security approaching, screaming at her to stop. Puppo barked a warning, growling at the approaching intruders.

She was destroying the memorial of their_ beloved_ late king.

_And this is for stealing my sanity._

"Queen! Stop!"

"You wretched old goat! _Stop!"_

She swung for the fences, smashing the pipe into the golden, handsome face. It shattered gloriously, breaking into thousands of glittering pieces and rained like sparkling fire. For a moment Meringue allowed stillness, as the golden sparkles rained around her like a glowing hailstorm of twinkling stars.

Her peace was short-lived as the pain she once ignored raged viciously. Ligaments screamed fatigue as her bones ached, lungs burning. She coughed violently as her breaths came out in short, wheezy rasps. Puppo stopped baying at the intruders and ran over to her, cooing softly, whimpering his concern.

She scrunched her trembling chalk-white fingers into fists, grimacing and fighting against the pain as she sank to her knees, strength dissolving.

_Not now._

"Look what you did!"

"Are you crazy?! You old hag!"

"We're holding you in contempt!" Meringue squeezed her eyes shut, grimacing as a blistering wave of pain made her head spin.

_I need strength...just...just a little longer Stars...Please..._

The Stars answered her plea. The incorrigible, merciless pain alleviated as her constricted airways expanded sweetly. She wiped the damp tears from her eyes before she turned to face her attackers. She ignored her trembling hands, still rattling from the strain of failing health.

"No," Queen Meringue's voice boomed as authoritatively as it did in her prime. She rose to her feet as if her joints were those of her granddaughter, "you're going to take me to my granddaughter. Now."

"You're lucky if we don't throw you in jail to _rot_!"

One guard darted forward but before he could grab her, Puppo grabbed the man's pant leg between his teeth and made the guard stagger. It delayed him just long enough for the empress to swing, a satisfying thud as she caught him in between the ribs. The guard cursed, crumbling to the ground at her feet. The Queen brandished the pipe overhead menacingly, teeth bared and eyes blazing like wildfire. Puppo snarled, standing beside her feet.

The other guardians halted, raising their hands in surrender, "No! Stop! We'll take you to your granddaughter! S-She's at CLUB VICE! It's not even t-ten minutes from here!"

"_Please!"_

Meringue narrowed her eyes, finally lowering the pipe. Icy tranquility replaced her raging anger as she regained her regal posture, "Thank you gentlemen. It's about time someone showcased some good manners. A lady was starting to worry."

"I would like a drink of water before we depart. Would one of you be a dear and fetch it for me?" she spoke crispy.

No one moved at first—stunned that she had issued an order to them after savagely kicking the _shit_ out of a man a third her age—but then one of the guards turned tail and went to fetch the empress her water. Meringue nodded her head and stood regally, awaiting them with posture worthy of a queen. Her sudden change of countenance frightened them worse than her ire; the Aqualandian guards learned _immediately_ that even in old age, Empress Sarasaland was_not_ a woman to be trifled with.

* * *

><p>Taurus continued to laugh, laughing at my grandmother, laughing at me, laughing at Sarasaland's ill-fate. A fate where the royal women have been forced into desperation. And he continued to laugh.<p>

I couldn't let this go. This was beyond politics; this was about my pride, my _family_. My hands trembled as I dug around until the tiny red Flash tonic was procured and clenched tightly within my shaking fingers. I kicked it back as the familiar blaze of heat stewed in the pit of my stomach and rose into my throat like smoke.

He was going to laugh at my family? At my grandmother?

_No. He wasn't._

I took a deep breath and violently expelled an exquisite arc of ginger flames onto his person. Taurus cried out, suddenly finding his clothes on fire. He wildly beat at the flames as I angrily growled, "That's what I _think _of you, _seloh_."

I took a second large gulp and shot another wave of flames onto his person. I didn't stick around to see if he ever put the flames out. I honestly didn't care if he burned to death. I all but ripped the doors open to the VIP longue. All of my suitor's head snapped up at the dramatic entrance.

There must have been something telling on my face because they all looked worried. By now the other patrons had cleared out and it was only us in here. Wolfe was at my side in two seconds flat.

"Where's Taurus?" Wolfe spat, "Stars above if he hurt you I'll—"

"I set him on fire," I stated blankly, no emotion attached, "Serves him right. He'll be too busy to cause us trouble."

Wolfe and Luigi gaped wordlessly, too stunned to retort.

"Daisy…?" Luigi asked softly.

"Let's just get the hell out of here," I snapped, angrily wiping at my eyes, "Let's just…get…as far away as possible. Where's Grammy?"

"We'll go get the empress," Silver nodded his head, "That way we can leave immediately."

"There'll be no need for that gentlemen, I'm already here."

Standing at the VIP lounge's entrance was Grammy's slender form. I was stunned; how did she find her way here? How did she even get here? Grammy's expression was eerily stern as she held Puppo in her arms. She began to encroach our position.

"Empress?" Even Zero was surprised, "How...How did you _get_ here? This is no place for the esteemed queen of Sarasaland to mingle."

"Your concern touches me, Lord Salini. I had a servant ferry me over," she replied simply.

Zero effortlessly switched over, speaking rapidly in Sarasalandian, filling Grammy in on everything, particularly that being in the Aqualands was no longer safe and that we had to get out of here _now._ She turned to look at Bowser and her stern glower faded, replaced with sympathy, "Oh Stars...Look at you..."

She rushed over to his side and gently coddled Bowser's swollen, battered face, standing on the tips of her toes to tenderly stroking his bruised cheek. Her eyes shone with emotion, "_Mi golgo, que happeno? Ti duele?_ Look at him, he is barely conscious..."

Grammy turned to look at me, blue eyes electric, voice serious "Daisy, we're leaving now."

"Grammy—!"

She raised her hand to silence me, "I will personally explain the entire thing to the council and to your father. We're leaving now, we're _not_ going to stay in a kingdom we're not welcome in, let alone safe."

"Let's go," Ryu pivoted on his heel, "I think we're going to have to backpedal fast. Follow me."

Zero pulled out a cell phone, "I'll alert the pilots to prepare for immediate departure. We go on your say, Shinobi."

* * *

><p>It was an understatement to say that our flight crew was shocked to see us so soon, and even more so when we ordered them to leave immediately. Once they saw Bowser and Wolfe's injuries, they didn't ask twice, knowing immediately we weren't safe and we were airborne within record time.<p>

The pilots had already radioed Father and the Sarasalandian council, updating them on the situation. Silver and the flight attendants had managed to get Bowser to shovel down a Mushroom and though Bowser was still weak and mostly incoherent, he had gained just enough strength to be fussy and stubborn; I knew he was going to be okay.

"Get that _junk_ away from me," Bowser growled with no true conviction, "I think I'm gonna hurl. No. I _totally_ am."

"Is he okay?" Ryu's deep voice came out in a soft whisper.

"He's ill because of a drug called rohypnol," Silver spoke, face unusually grim, "depending on the quantity of the drug, it can make someone physically ill. We _want_ him to induce vomiting, his system needs to be rid of that drug."

"_Oh man_..." Wolfe muttered, his skin turning slightly green, "Someone_ that _big puking sounds like it's gonna be messy and loud."

"Don't be crude, Wolfe," Zero sighed, "...And _of course_ it's going to be loud, he's a ten foot turtle."

"Here King Bowser," a helpful flight attendant approached, "Here's a trash bag, I don't think we'll get you to the—"

Bowser snatched the large trash bag from her hand and—if possible—his face turned a sickly shade of green. When he became ill, I did my best to ignore his sickness as Wolfe steadily grew sicker and greener, starting to look not too hot himself. Silver made sure he administered one last healing Mushroom tonic after Bowser's last sick spell.

"Come on King Bowser," Silver answered, "You should consume one more Mushroom."

"Eat a mushroom? _Another one?_" Bowser's raspy voice managed to sound irate, "You kidding me, Albino boy? I just puked up the Lavalava ocean."

Grammy patted Bowser's arm, "It'll make you feel better, Dear."

"I know you're strong," Silver spoke gently, "but I also know you're in insurmountable pain. You'll feel better. And a red essence should relieve your pain until dawn, if my estimations are correct."

Bowser narrowed his eyes speculatively; a red essence had the strength to make someone invincible for a short amount of time. If it could hold off his pain until we made it back...

"Make this quick," Bowser growled.

"Mushrooms do sound good," Wolfe licked his lips, "with _gravy_ and _soy sauce_, mayo, relish, ketchup, sugar and _all_ the toppings!"

Bowser's eyes grew wide as he suddenly groaned again, covering his mouth as he staggered in a blind rush to the back of the airplane all but charging to the bathroom to wretch.

"..._Oops_," Wolfe whispered.

While everyone shot Wolfe dirty looks, surprisingly Zero of all people laughed. Bowser returned, swearing in a guttural, rough Darklandian as he held his stomach.

"_Ugh..." _Bowser moaned.

He slumped into his seat, face sweaty and eyes fuzzy. A flight attendant handed over a cool wash cloth and I set to task, carefully wiping sweat from Bowser's forehead. Bowser blinked at me sluggishly, as if trying to figure out who I was. I took a knee, smiling at him weakly, "Hey, how are you feeling, Big guy?"

His red eyes lacked the glow of their usual fierce vitality and alertness, "...Flow...er?"

"Yeah, it's me Bo-King Bowser..."

I was surprised when his face turned red and with a glower, turned his head away, "...You _totally _saw me barfing just now..."

Luigi blinked, "Well..._technically _we _all_-a did. The airplane isn't big at all."

"I'll get the Red essence," Silver smiled, though fatigue added dark circles under his eyes.

"Uh...Flower...?" Bowser's voice was soft, "W-Would you...stay with me?"

Grammy managed to slip a sly smile my direction. I smiled, clutching his hand, "Sure..."

"I'll try my best _not_ to puke on you," he wheezed, closing his eyes and resting.

I laughed weakly, ruffling his messy mane, "That's a..._nice_ thought Bowwy."

Minutes and hours had faded blandly into late night and the hazard of the evening's events left us all deeply exhausted yet ironically enough, we were all too wired, too anxious to even attempt acquiring a few winks of sleep. Silver and a few of the flight attendants had bandaged and cleaned most of Wolfe's wounds and now they were working on cleaning and bandaging Bowser. Ryu had tucked the Koopaling in for the night, the only one of us who had been able to catch a wink of sleep.

Everyone was huddled near Bowser, making sure to stay out of Silver's way as we watched the proceedings. My mind went in and out like satellite radio, I focused on everything and nothing at once; I could hear the murmur of Silver's voice, detect Wolfe's soft breathing and occasionally, Ryu would thoughtlessly flip a kunai between his fingers.

And if I wasn't watching them, I was staring out the window. The sky was an endless, starless black abyss that didn't help lift my heavy mood. Silver kneeled beside Bowser, pulling the tab off a Red Essence, "This will help him immediately, please drink it all, King Bowser."

Bowser downed the tonic, tilting his head back to catch every last drop. Silver stepped back, waiting for the tonic to kick in. Wolfe turned to Silver, "How do we know when it will work—?"

Bowser's entire form jolted with a violent jerk, as a brilliant blaze of ruby-red red aura engulfed his massive form like flames. He startled everyone so badly, causing half of the suitors to jump away as I nearly toppled into Ryu.

One second he was crouched over, holding his stomach, and then the next he shot up like a rocket, nearly scratching Wolfe with his horns. A rich, garnet red aura of strength flashed around his frame. Bowser flexed and wiggled his fingers, testing their strength as he seemed shocked. Even more crazy, his irises were glowing, blazing like the flames of fire. For a moment we all stared at him, awed by the renewed vitality.

Bowser blinked, peering at us all questioningly. The glowing, blazing red of his irises were kind of daunting, "...What?"

"Holy crap!" Wolfe squawked, holding a hand over his heart, "My poor heart just can't _take_ anymore of _this!_"

"King Bowser, how do you feel?" Grammy asked, "Good as new, right?"

He smirked, peering at us all, "It's been awhile since I've had a Red Essence. Completely forgot how badass this stuff is. I'm fine now, Empress."

"I'm glad you feel better," Silver smiled, "But r-remember, it's only temporary."

There was a loud, angry chirrup followed by a couple of shushes from the flight attendants. Bowser titled his head, "...Did I just hear a _Koopaling_?"

"Yeah," Luigi nodded his head, "Ryu rescued him. Do you want—?"

Zero tapped his chin, "King Bowser might understand him. Ladies, bring the Koopaling over if you will."

As instructed, the maids brought over the baby Koopaling who was busy sucking his thumb, peering around with wide, curious eyes. Bowser smirked, "Hey there. Who's this?"

The baby Koopaling chirruped, trying to totter over to Bowser and nearly tumbled over his own feet. Bowser surprised us all when he laughed with gentle amusement and stooped to a knee to catch the Koopaling, "Whoa there little guy. What's goin' on?"

The baby Koopa troopa chirruped and yipped in babyish squeaks. Bowser responded back every so often in a growl or a purr. I don't know what they said but by the end of their conversation, the baby Troopa hovered near the huge Koopa king, holding onto his leg as if seeking protection.

Bowser cut a glare at the other suitors, "I wanna talk to Flower _alone_."

Wolfe opened his mouth to protest, but Zero raised a hand to silence him. They gave a lingering look or two but then slowly turned to leave. Once Bowser was sure that no one else could hear us, he spoke. No longer did he use the imposing growl the cruel 'King Bowser' spoke in, but the relaxed, smooth bass my friend did.

"Talk to me," he said softly, "What just happened? Why are you upset Flower?"

"That asshole—"

Bowser laughed, "_Whoa!_ You see this little guy?"

I blinked, completely forgetting about the baby Koopa Troopa who peered up at me with big brown eyes. He was tiny, not even bigger than Bowser's leg. Smirking, Bowser patted at the Koopaling's shell, "This is Kooples and he's barely walking. Let's keep the language clean hmm?" he chuckled.

I blushed, "Ah, I'm sorry Kooples."

The small Koopa chirruped back and I nearly cooed at how light and childish his clucks and purrs were. I smiled at the cute Koopa, "He doesn't speak...uh 'human' Humanese? Whatever it's called."

Bowser chuckled, "Kooples here is three years old. He's still learning words in his native Koopa language. In fact I'm sure he was just potty trained recently, or so he _claims_."

Kooples chirruped indignantly and Bowser laughed, "Okay, okay he's _officially _potty trained. _My bad_, Kooples."

I laughed, and took a knee to speak with Kooples. Bowser smirked, bending down to purr something. Whatever he said had Kooples launching into my arms. He was clucking happily in gibberish clicks and chirrups and I looked up to Bowser for translation.

Bowser chuckled, "The little tyke said he thinks you smell nice."

I laughed, "Well tell him I said thanks and that I think he's adorable."

Bowser looked down at Kooples with a playful smirk and purred in a gravely, rumbling bass. It was just amazing knowing that through his growls he was actually speaking a language. Kooples smiled, blushing as he chirruped happily.

As Kooples was nuzzling himself deeper into my arms, I looked up at Bowser, "Now then, tell me what happened Flower."

I rose to my feet, holding Kooples in my arms; carrying him was easier than I thought, "...Taurus basically terminated the alliance between Sarasaland and the Aqualands. They provide us with seventy-five percent of our water. But what he did was _nothing _compared what he did you—"

Bowser interrupted me smoothly, "Save it. That's another talk for another time. What he did to your water treaty is _way _more catastrophic, considering you all live in a _desert_."

"Exactly, so what are we supposed to do now?" speaking softer, I looked into Kooples round eyes, "What am I to do Kooples? I think I just failed my kingdom, little one..."

As Kooples chirruped softly back to me, babbling in a sort of Koopa baby gibberish, Bowser remained silent, momentarily lost in a sea of thoughts. I remained stone-faced, staring off into nothingness as millions of thoughts traveled through my head.

_What was Sarasaland supposed to do now?_

"Well now that the king is feeling better, would you like to explain what happened with Prince Taurus?"

I turned to look over at Zero. His face was completely straight, eyes unblinking. Bowser snarled, his gruff animalistic drawl present in his words, "Hey Dumbass, why don't you shut your trap before I—"

"It's alright Lord Bowser," I replied softly, "I think everyone present deserves to know the truth."

The other suitors—I quickly came to realize—had been pretending to have been busy doing other things. For the second they heard me speak, they immediately gathered with Ryu, Luigi, Wolfe and Prince Silver took the nearest seats as Zero and Bowser opted to stand. Grammy sat beside me, eyes shining with concern.

It was then I realized that they all had been curious to know what had happened in the Aqualands. Heck, even the flight attendants had peered in to hear the story. I gazed at the ceiling, "Prince Taurus made some terrible demands to make 'reparations' for our actions at dinner..."

I gave a complete account of everything that night and made sure not to leave out any details—though I never mentioned what he had said about Grammy—I recounted his threats to end our treaty, his lascivious demands and how he had been completely responsible for what had happened to Bowser.

As I regurgitated the less tasteful moments of my evening, each of the suitors' faces grew darker—particularly Bowser and Wolfe—murderous by the end of it. Grammy's face was chalk white, lips drawn into a taut line.

"How utterly _despicable_," Ryu spoke in a soft voice that was nothing less than lethal.

"I can't believe that asshole would behave in such a way," Wolfe growled, "You guys should have let me sock him once. Or kicked him. Stars knows I'm flexible enough to kick his teeth out."

"We've already recounted your tale to the Emperor and the council, Princess," a flight attendant spoke, "This is...absolutely _awful_..."

"We'll be landing soon," A second flight attendant spoke, skin ashen, "Please return to your seats and fasten your seat belts."

I took my seat beside Grammy, who was busy staring out the window. I remained silent; was this the proper time to even ask her about...about what Taurus had told me about? The...the thing between her and his grandfather?

But this did explain her odd behavior the entire day; who would want to return to a horrible kingdom where you had sacrificed apart of yourself so sacred, to keep your people alive? It was terrible and noble at the same time.

Her gaze out the window was melancholy and I didn't know what to say; should I offer condolences? Tonight didn't seem like the appropriate moment. I would ask at another time when we both weren't exhausted and up to her necks in political turmoil.

It wasn't much longer when we landed within Sarasalandian borders. I thought I'd be happy to return home, but arriving with a terminated alliance under my belt felt like a failure. There were a sea of dark vehicles awaiting our aircraft and a horde of imposing agents were flooded by flashing red and blue emergency lights, SWAT teams and police stood by.

We didn't bother to retrieve our personal items and simply departed the plane. Bowser was to my back as I trailed behind Ryu. The moment I stepped foot out of the airplane, everything came crashing down painfully; I had ruined an alliance between my kingdom and a key ally.

Everything that happened tonight flashed before my eyes in an overwhelming kaleidoscope of memories: the beautiful underwater city, the savage mistreatment Kooples had suffered, Bowser's bloody, bruised form, but Prince Taurus' horrid silver eyes were burned into my mind's eye.

Power-drunk and avaricious, I could still see the prince's granite eyes wide with demented mirth as he laughed. Even now I could still hear the sound of his deep laughter. He laughed because he knew I had ruined Sarasaland, by turning him down I had sentenced my people to drought and famine.

One way or another, I would have to crawl back to him, beginning for forgiveness. Sarasaland was already facing drought, but now that I cut off our provider of _seventy-five percent_ of our water; I have indirectly sentenced my people to death.

How could I even explain such a terrific failure to the council? Or even to Father? After all the effort and tireless hours, years even spent cultivating a relationship that I destroyed within seconds...

My head swam, colors mixing together in a jumbled blur and sounds blending into a uniform nothingness. Nothing mattered; everything around me became numb; the drastic cold of the desert night, the chatter of my friends.

Vertigo slammed into me like a freight train, crushing and denting ruthlessly. The world suddenly tilted violently and I stumbled, brief surprise flashed across Ryu's features as I staggered, falling to hands and knees.

Acrid bile rose up my throat as I wretched. My stomach clenched violently as my throat burned, eyes blurring from tears. Vaguely I could hear my suitors approach, concerns tossed about as I emptied the contents of my nauseous stomach in a completely uncultured act. Hands were upon my shoulder, dragging hair out of my sweaty face.

The moment I stopped emptying the contents of my stomach, I was picked up from the asphalt. I couldn't think straight, and felt as if I was having an out of body experience. I could hear everyone asking if I was all right, I could see Grammy's concerned face and the golden sparkle of Wolfe's eyes, but it all made no sense.

I was insanely cold and uncomfortably hot. I was lifted into someone's arms and it seemed as if the world was becoming clearer. The painful pounding of a headache seemed to ease up, and when I blinked, my vision had stopped spinning. We were in a vehicle, in a dark limousine; how much time had passed? Grammy was above me as I lay in her lap.

"We're approaching the palace, all teams stand by," the official, authoritative voice sounded familiar.

"T-Toadux?" I croaked weakly.

All heads snapped in my direction, "Princess, how are you feeling?"

"_Pichi_," Grammy sounded so tired, "Are you alright, Dear?"

"Yeah...I think so..."

I sat up, seeing the worried faces of Luigi, Ryu and Bowser peering back at me. The others must have rode in a second limousine.

Luigi's brows creased together, "Princess Daisy, you-a scared us all!"

"How are you feeling?" Ryu asked.

"I'm...okay now...I think," I spoke softly.

"Stars, you scared the hell out of me," Bowser was frowning, with Kooples sitting by his side, "You looked like a zombie back there..."

"Yeah, I'm okay," I whispered, "I'm just..._tired_."

The remainder of the ride was silent; I don't think anything said could have lightened the dismal mood. It wasn't too soon when the Grand Sarasaland palace appeared. With the security lights shining on the Sarasaland palace, the white halls of the castle seemed to glow mysteriously against the black backdrop of night.

We cleared security as the limo pulled to a stop before our front gates. The chauffeur pulled the doors open and as Ryu and Bowser exited, I nudged Grammy, who had been snoozing.

"Huh? What is it Dearie?"

"Grammy, we're here, let's go."

"Oh…Okay. Just...let me rest...a little more," her eyes fluttered shut.

I became worried. I shook her a bit harder, "Grammy? _Granna?!"_

But no matter how hard I shook her, she never roused to clear consciousness. My spiking anxiety had Bowser and Ryu backtracking, "_Granna! Granna!? _What's _wrong _you with you!?"

Bowser lumbered over, concern clear on his usually gruff features, "Is Queen Meringue okay?"

"I don't know," I whispered, fear bubbling up in my chest, "She's so cold…And she's not responding to me anymore."

Ryu dropped to a knee and touched her head, "…She is dreadfully cold, shivering even. I'm going to retrieve a medic."

As Ryu dashed off, my entire body shook, "Why didn't she _say_ anything?" I whispered.

"Because she-a was taking care of you. The entire time you weren't feeling-a well, she was watching over-a you," Luigi replied softly.

I grew angry, "Stars she can be so _stupid_! She's older and has so many things to watch out for…"

"If she's cold, then give her to me," Bowser gently picked up Grammy, who looked so small in his arms, "Poor lady…she's shivering."

I cursed vehemently in Sarasalandian, even going as far as kicking the carpeted floor; I was _not _going to have my grandmother grow sick over me. I was not going to have her die over a fight stemming from that _seloh _Taurus.

Bowser breathed fire and within minutes, Grammy had stopped shivering and Luigi retrieved a Maple Syrup from Silver. Grammy became conscious but remained very tired. Even before we could enter the palace, Father, alongside of a few key members of the Grand Sarasaland Elder council, burst into the court. Father's practiced stoic mask broke as he saw Bowser and Wolfe's bandages, Grammy's fatigue and our obvious wear and tear.

"My Stars..." he whispered.

"Sir? What do we do?" Toadux asked.

"What action should we take?" Protectorate Salini asked, as Zero fell to his side.

The world around us stilled into hushed whispers as all eyes fell upon Emperor Sarasaland, seeking his council and leadership. Father's composure was steel; when Sarasaland needed their judicious, dauntless king, like a phoenix rising from ashes, so did he always rise to the occasion.

He began to command everything with effortless calm, "Lady Angora, take the empress to the family physician. High Protectorate Salini, gather the councilmen and schedule an emergency meeting at Dawn. Alabaster would you see to the suitors being accommodated with our finest guests suites? Commander Toadux I want the Sarasaland border and palace reinforced with an entire platoon. You all have your orders. See them done."

There was a surplus of bows, and salutes before everyone scattered in hundreds of different ways, heading to fulfill their directives. Father turned to me, face still perfectly straight, "And as for you, _Chisana_. I will want to hear everything."

* * *

><p>It was several hours past midnight as I sat in Father's bedchambers. A cup of fragrant cinnamon tea was wedged within my trembling digits and all my favorite pastries lay on the coffee table untouched.<p>

Though Father knew things had gone terribly wrong within the Aqualands, he was behaving as if everything was perfectly fine, as if Sarasaland wasn't in peril and that our citizens wouldn't face the inevitable drought. He finished dog-earing a page in a novel before swiftly rising to his feet and taking a seat across from me.

I fired off a round of questions before he could even completely relax, "How is Kooples? Where is he?"

"The Koopaling is being watched by a reputable nursemaid. Tomorrow morning I will have a social worker contact the Darklandian Koopaling services."

"And what about Grammy? Or the destroyed treaty? Or—?"

"Take your time and enjoy the tea, _Chisana,_" Father took a long draw of tea, closing his eyes in pleasure, "_Mmm. _Delicious."

Slightly irritated, I raised my voice, "Father how can you be so calm at a time like thi—!?"

"I have been updated on your grandmother's status and I want to let you know she is fine," Father helped himself to scones, "She suffered from exhaustion and is now resting."

"And the Aqualands," I shook my head, "We have too—"

Father smiled softly, "Have I told you how much I missed you? Just these few days went by and I missed you so. Truth be told I was worried about you the whole time and haven't had a half decent night's sleep since."

"I was fine, Dad..." I whispered, smiling.

"Did you...enjoy your trip?" he asked, studying me carefully, blue eyes flickering around my form.

"Yeah it was fun," I laughed weakly, peering into the contents of my sweet drink, "I rode a huge Chow, ate at an elegant, serene snow restaurant, went to a beautiful love festival and had a romantic dinner under the stars...It was all so amazing...Well, before _this _moment happened...Look...Dad...I..."

I stared at the elegant china, trying to arrange my thoughts as Father lightly sipped at his tea.

"Not touching the crème cakes hmm? You seem deeply troubled. Rest assured _Chisana,_ Sarasaland will take care of the predicament involving the Aqualands."

I frowned, "Dad...This isn't just going to _go_ away...You and I both know this..."

He stopped all movement, looking up at me expectantly, "While you were touring the other kingdoms...Nothing happened with that...that _Koopa_?"

As eloquent as ever, I replied with, "Huh?"

Father's eyes narrowed and his voice darkened ominously, "Daisy…Pardon my frank speech, but did that heathen…try any _atrocious _behavior with you?"

My face flushed blood-red, "_F-Father!_ No! Just…_No!_ Why a-are you suspicious of Bo—um—King Bowser anyways!?_"_

"I just..._know_ some things about his unsavory character. Now then, you tell your father the truth. I will not be angry. But by the Stars, if I find out anything I will have him castr—"

"Dad," I stared down into my lap, "No matter how much you pretend, to ignore the looming problem...I…Things went terribly in the Aqualands Kingdom. Our t-treaty is now null and void. Father...Our citizens are in _trouble,_" I half gasped, half sobbed as I peered up at him.

My vision blurred and I could feel the hot sting of tears clouding my vision. Father's stern expression melted away as I continued, only this time in fluent Sarasalandian, "_It's because of me Prince Taurus terminated our treaty but I tried my hardest to make it work! But…I…I couldn't. Father I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. He wanted me to h-have...s-s-s-sex with him. I didn't and now we're no longer allies."_

The waterworks came out full force and soon I was sobbing, apologizing rapidly in Sarasalandian. As I continued to cry and mumble my words, Father placed a soothing hand on my shoulder and titled my chin up.

I was floored by Father's sympathetic visage and warm eyes, "_Chisana, _everything will be fine. Remember what I told you at your _Summani? _I will not let you fall. I am proud of the grace and strength you have shown, however not all of life's detours are under our control. "

"But..."

"This is business for your Father to handle now," his soft whisper tickled my cheek.

I don't know what was the last thread that frayed and tore my tattered composure, whether it was because of a suppressed, building guilt that had been compiling in my being like cancer or if it was due to the unexpected show of compassion and love; I sobbed harder as Father pulled me into a strong hug, protectively nestling my head under his chin.

The second the tears had began, I couldn't shut them off, sobbing wildly as I buried my face into Father's soft, long ebon locks. He held me close, strong arms locked around my trembling form, a hand gently kneading my back as the soft fragrance of his cologne filled my nose.

* * *

><p>It was a quarter past one and Father had ordered me to get a few hours of rest. We both knew tomorrow would be a <em>long <em>day and in less than twenty four hours the world would learn of tonight and worse yet the media would probably make the incident at CLUB VICE into a world-wide spectacle.

Though I returned to my room, I remained wide awake with anxiety and stress, mind reeling from yesterday's—or was it today's—events. I kept most of the lighting in my room dim since Firefly was sleeping. At least one of us could get a good night's sleep.

There was a wrap on my door and I glanced up, wondering who it could be at such a late hour. I pulled open the door and there stood Bowser. The Red Essence still had him blazing bright like a living fireball; how did he even manage to sneak in here like that!? A gigantic, _glowing _Koopa King should _not _be able to sneak into my room.

His lips quirked as if he wanted to smile, "Somehow I figured you'd still be awake."

"May I ask how in the _world _you were able to sneak through the halls and to my room _undetected!_?" I was curious, _real _curious.

"_Pfft_ Flower," he rolled his eyes, "I've had _years _of practice."

"The practice of sneaking around? You don't seem like the type to have stealth and—"

Bowser smirked, buffing his claws against his plastron, "A studly, ladykiller like myself has been sneaking into Koopette's bedroom windows of course for some late-night _lovin_'. Been doin' it since I was a teen."

It's even worse than I imagine. I glared at him incredulously as he laughed, "_Wow_. Chalk that up as another tacky behavior."

"Speaking of _tacky," _Bowser's grin become nothing but trouble, "what's up with _those _pajamas?"

I glared, cheeks flushing angrily as he laughed softly; how _dare_ he make fun of my fluffy, innocent Yoshi-print jammies, "_H-Hey_! There's nothing wrong with my jammies!"

"_Jammies!? _Oh my _Stars_," he laughed, "you really _do _call them that stupid word!"

"For _your_ information..."

I stopped when I really looked at him. Underneath the glowing red energy of the Red Essence, he was a wreck; stained bloody bandages, bruises and lacerations. It didn't help he was filthy, his once gleaming shell lacquered with mud and soot. What, he didn't take a shower in his suite!?

"Bowser..." I whispered, "You..._my Stars,_ you look like you've been to hell and back."

He smirked, a jagged red laceration stretching on his lip, "I don't suppose that means I can come in...?"

"No! Come on in!" I all but shoved him in, "You should take a shower. At the least that way I can clean your cuts better. Didn't you see the physician?!"

"I _saw_ him alright. He was puny, old, had white hair and—"

I glared, "Did you take any medicine?!"

"Yeah, the _quacktors_—by that I meant doctors—mixed Starmans into a mushroom potion. I feel stiff. And I think they finally got all that shit out of my system. That roo-froo drug."

"You need to—"

"I'm_ fine_," he grunted, "The only thing I'm mildly pissed about, was that humans were able to do this to me. Ain't no way in hell I'm gonna see a medic for something humans did."

"You _need_ medical attention. And this trespass...this is worthy of declaring war over."

Again Bowser snorted indignantly, "What the hell would I look like coming to my council and telling them a pack of sissy humans did this? They'd laugh their asses off. I'd rather give up the shell off my back before I tell anyone about this."

I sighed angrily, "Your ego is going to get you killed one day. At the very least let me clean some of those cuts."

"I said I don't need help," then he made a considering look before turning to me and grinned, "But if you wanna play doctor...I don't think I'll mind."

"Then you can start by taking a shower."

I marched him over to my bathroom and collected several large towels before stuffing them into his arms. They probably were barely big enough to dry his head but if he used all of them then he should be able to get decently dry.

"Aww, look how _tiny_ these towels are. And look at this shower? Can I even _fit _all this masculine studmuffiness in there!?" he smirked peering around, "This is all so cute. Everything in here is so tiny it looks like a doll house."

I ignored his teasing and entered my bathroom. I squeezed past him, went to the shower, turning the water on and stared at him pointedly;_ get in and hurry the hell up._ A crooked grin crawled across his face, "Coming in also? I _love_having things to play with when I bathe. You know, like rubber duckies, hot Desert babes with long legs..."

I didn't even bat an eyelash or alter my expression, "...I think you _know _the answer to that."

"Great! Go ahead and whip out your most revealing bikini and hop on in," as he was removing his spiked gauntlets, he was laughing, "Or better yet we can both get naked and—"

I snarled as a burning blush flared over my face and with a huge shove, I slammed the door in his face. All the while Bowser laughed his ass off. So while Bowser occupied my shower—there would be an occasional thud or bump followed by a loud curse—I paced around the room.

A few minutes later Bowser stepped out of the bathroom, steam rising in hot puffs as his usually wild mane slicked against his skull with moisture. He surprised me with a startlingly animalistic trait. He shook himself vigorously, the way a dog would try to rid its fur of water. When Bowser tromped over to my bed, I was suddenly flooded with the intoxicating scent of fresh apples and peaches.

"Mmm," I sighed, "You smell _soooo_ good."

He looked indignant, "I probably smell _uber girly_ thanks to you. It was either green apple paradise or floral festival and the king of Koopas will _never_ smell like some _Star damn_ patch of flowers."

I grinned, "Don't take it so personally, green apple is a great scent!"

I leaned in and sighed, "_Mmm_, my favorite scent."

I sighed happily and hovered near his freshly scrubbed plastron. Bowser elevated an eyebrow and grinned, "Hmm, I'm definitely starting to see the perks of this. I thought my manly aura would be enough to draw you in but I guess I just need to smell like a stupid fruit."

I motioned for him to sit beside me and after a few verbal jabs about, 'trying to tell the 'Darklandian studmuffin' what to do,' he compiled. My bed frame groaned under the burden of his weight and we both peered around before looking at each other, "...You better not break my bed."

He smirked wickedly, "Breaking bedframes huh? Ohoho, _Flower_. I've got several ways to—_ugh!_"

I dabbed alcohol onto one of his lacerations and peered at him innocently. He gave an irritated growl but didn't say anymore. I continued to apply alcohol on all the open wounds and though his muscles tightened and his jaw would clench, he didn't bat an eye at the pain. I carefully smoothed astringent mushroom balm over his lacerations before bandaging them.

I sighed, wiping my bangs out of my face; one last area to get, his face. Even with him sitting, Bowser was still too tall. I teetered on the tips of my toes, awkwardly leaning and reaching around but I could barely reach his thick neck. He watched, quietly amused at the spectacle I made of myself. "I...can't reach your face. Duck down and make this easy."

"I wanted to see how long you'd continue to fail for," he huffed, sounding suspiciously like a laugh, "you've been doing this for awhile now."

Apparently he knew a whole lot sooner that I wasn't getting anywhere near his face. He half smirked, ruby red eyes flickering with interest, "You can reach my face easy enough..._If_ you sit on my lap."

I blushed, quickly backing away and nearly falling over myself, "_I a-am NOT sitting on your lap_!"

He sighed dramatically, even going as far as throwing his arm over his head in 'dismay', "Stars my face hurts _sooooo_ badly...I _wish_ I could be taken care of. I mean I was ONLY jumped by a group off pissed-off, racist humans who wanted to kill me. I _wish_ I had a great, caring, loving _friend_ who would want to take care of me. If _only_ there was a way to—"

"Oh Stars," I groaned, rolling my eyes, "Fine! _Fine._ I'll do it. But it means _nothing_!"

His theatrics ended in a hurry as a large grin blossomed across his face. He was smiling so largely I could see all his teeth, "Of course. Now then, if you will...?"

Just to rub it in, he patted a spot on his knee, wiggling his eyebrows. I glared, biting the inside of my cheek as he grinned in his usual smug fashion.

_Stars help me._

I stepped over him carefully, all too aware of how his red irises were trailing watching my every move diligently. I hesitated, contemplating the consequences—and his bragging—before gently easing on his knee. He purred loudly, a thick rumbling poured from his chest and immediately my cheeks flushed.

"You know," he grinned slyly, voice thick with a purring bass, "It's been _awhile _since I've had a girl this pretty in my lap."

Blushing, I scowled, "Do you want to be bandaged or _what_?!"

He laughed, "Don't stop on my behalf, _Purga_."

I realized I was sitting on a nasty-looking welt, "Am I hurting you? That looks painful."

"No," he smirked, "You're as light as a feather."

I dunked the cloth into mushroom tonic, making sure it was thoroughly soaked before swabbing Bowser's face with gentle, soft strokes. He closed his eyes, leaning in towards my touch.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered as I lightly touched a swollen, puffy wound.

"For what?"

"For this," guilt made it hard to swallow, "I'm so sorry this happened to you...Taurus is such a scumbag. He tortured you because of me..."

His eyes snapped open, darkened with anger, "Flower _don't_. He hated me long before he ever set eyes on you," Bowser spoke in a rough voice, eyes tight, "don't apologize for something that had nothing to do with you. Which reminds me, I owe that stupid human a visit after this is all said and do—"

He trailed off, eyes widening as I touched his face. My fingers swept along his cheek and strong jawline. It always amazed me how his scales were warm. I wonder if Koopas were really warm-blooded, just like us humans. Bowser pulled away, surprise on his face, "What ...was _that_?"

"I feel so bad. I know I shouldn't but look at you," my voice was starting to break, "while we were in VIP, this happened to you. S-Shouldn't I have sensed my dear friend's danger? Shouldn't I have felt it? A gut instinct or something? Anything?"

Bowser's expression softened, "Flower..."

"I should have felt you needed me..." I whispered, fingering a purpling bruise, "I feel so..."

There was an awful cut running up the length of his left bicep. Then a thought came to mind; thinking of what my mother used to do when I was a child. She would kiss my booboos better.

I didn't think, I just moved, pressing a soft kiss against the red, inflamed scales. The scales I kissed were pleasantly warm and smooth. This time Bowser made a noise in the back of his throat. I froze, realizing what I had just _done. _I had demonstratively kissed _Bowser._ I had _intentionally_ kissed my _friend,_ flirting with our already frail, confusing barrier of friendship.

My face burned hotter than Bowser's fire as I pulled away, gaping at him wide-eyed. Though he didn't pull away, his voice was unsure, "What...was that for?"

"Humans have a...kind of silly idea," I whispered, "t-that kissing wounds makes them feel better."

His expression changed, opening, "Oh yeah?"

"Y-Yeah..."

He grinned lopsidedly as he pointed to another jagged laceration on his elbow. I laughed, leaning forward to press a soft kiss against his skin. This time a deep rumble of approval reverberated from his chest.

He wriggled his red brows and pointed to a wound on his chin. As I leaned in, a claw carefully brushed against my cheek and slipped under my chin. Bowser tilted his head and gently pulled my face towards his. A soft kiss pressed against my temple, followed by another to my cheek and the last found its way home as our lips met. Emotion erupted like a geyser as all the bottled up feelings corked open.

The fear, anxiety and stress washed away as Bowser held me. Reason and sense returned in a sudden sharp surge as I pulled away, cheeks enflamed. Flustered, I brushed the bangs out of my face as I studied his smug grin, "W-What...was _that_ for?"

He half grinned, "Did you _like_ it? That's the important question."

"W-What?!" I squawked, turning away and hiding my face, "_Who asks questions like that anyways!?"_

He laughed, shaking his head, "_Stars. _You're more dense than a Thwomp's _ass_. It's kinda _cute. _But frustrating as hell."

I peeled back my fingers, just enough to glare at him, "What was _that _you were saying!?"

He smirked, "I had a cut on my lip you missed."

I averted my stare, "Oh..."

Still reeling, I finished cleaning and disinfecting every area on his face. I wiped the cut above his eyebrow, removing the dried layer of blood. Once finished I pulled away to admire my handiwork, if it wasn't for the bruises and lacerations, he would look as good as new.

He opened his eyes and for a second I studied him, "You know, this may sound weird but you wear battle wounds well."

"Well you're right about one thing, it's definitely _weird_," he grinned, "explain yourself crazy woman."

I chuckled, "I mean...some people, after they are beaten up look terrible. But you, I don't know how to explain it, but wounds don't make you look weak. On you, it looks good. It's dashing or _something._"

It was definitely _or something._ Because Bowser could never be dashing. And I never thought of him as dashing. _Ever._

...I think.

"Ah, I get it," he stretched out his frame, running a hand through his mane, "I look _utterly _masculine and badass is what it sounds like you're saying. Normally I wouldn't let anyone do this...But if you want to fulfill a girlish fantasy then go ahead and touch my wounds."

I made a noise between a laugh and a choke, "_Fulfill a fantasy_?! Stars you're so full of yourself."

He studied his claws with feigned interest, "I also think, since I was oh so critically injured, a suave,_ handsome_ Koopa should get some cuddlin' out of this."

I raised a very prevalent eyebrow, "Some cuddlin'?' What is '_cuddlin'_?"

He pulled me directly into his lap, flush against his plastron. When I peered up, his face was inches away.

"What we're about to _do_," he purred, lightly stroking my cheek, "is some good ole fashion _cuddlin_' Flower."

"..._Chisana_?"

_Oh nooooooooooooo!_

We both froze, as Bowser's seductive smile went _kaputz_. Not kaputz. It went _kaBOOM_. _Oh my bleeding, exploding Stars_. _Father was coming. Father was coming and I was sitting in Bowser's lap._

I hopped off of Bowser like he was on fire. I think I accidentally kicked him in the chest during the dismount. He grunted, casting a dark glare my way as Father approached the doorway. His long shadow slowly slipped into the doorframe, forecasting his soon to be appearance, _"...Chisana_? Are you awake?"

I whipped around, eyes wide with terror as I hissed, "_Go hide_!"

He made a crazy look, nearly crossing his eyes and threw his hands up, "Yeah?! _Where?_! Where can I hide _all of this studliness_?!"

"Just_ go_! I don't _care_ where you hide _all of that studliness_!" I hissed desperately, peering at the doorframe with mounting desperation as Father was beginning to grow more curious.

Bowser stood up, shaking his fist and I was surprised he was...blushing? Why was he worked up, "Ugh_! Damn it_! I'm _not_ about to hide like a _friggin'_ _loser. _This is _not_ how I planned this _moment_!_"_

"Just _go_!" I hissed.

My head snapped around on a dime as Father entered the room with a soft smile. I turned to peer for Bowser but...

He _vanished_. Wow, he managed to hide that humungous scaly hide of his in no time flat;_ I'm really impressed! _Father sat onto the bed beside me and gently touched my cheek. He paused, squinting, "...Is your bed bent in a little?"

A bead of sweat rolled down my cheek, "Uh...n-no?"

"Hmm odd. Anyways, how are you feeling?"

"Uh..."

My eyes darted away from Father and quickly scanned around the room. I had _no_ friggin' idea where Bowser was and if Father knew I had a boy—let alone the tyrannical Darklandian _king_—hidden in my room, he'd go _kongshit_.

"I feel...okay..."

But Father remained unconvinced, "_Chisana_, I know you feel responsible for this whole thing but do not burden yourself with unnecessary sentiment. The irresponsible actions of one puerile ruler should not hurt you."

"Okay..." I spoke softly.

"Despite all that has transpired," his expression warmed marginally, "I'm relieved you came home to me safe."

"Father..."

His stare hardened, "Let it be known I was _never _keen on the idea of letting you _frolic_ around with seven..._young men_. The Council thought it best but...They're young men. Quite frankly I don't _trust _them..."

I shifted uncomfortably; I had to keep in mind that Bowser could hear _everything _Father was saying. And this topic was dicey at best. Heaven forbid Bowser learns what Father's _real _thoughts and feelings are about my suitors; he could probably blackmail me...

"I especially lack trust with _him_. King Bowser," Father glowered.

_Ohhhhh_ _sheyt_. I half laughed and half gaped in absolute horror. I covered my mouth to keep from laughing, "Dad! Don't talk about him like that!"

Father glanced past me, shaking his head, "I can't why explain but there's just..._something_ about King Bowser rubs me the wrong way. He is arrogant, impetuous and seems inane."

Somewhere in the room I heard a very soft, pissed-off growl; yeah that was Bowser and again I managed to choke back my laughter. Father must have caught the tail end of Bowser's growl and peered around with a curious eyebrow.

"Did you hear something...?"

"Umm," I coughed suddenly, "t-there's nothing wrong with King Bowser. He's not as bad as you think!"

"Then describe some of his good qualities, if you _can,_" Father stated.

"Well he's..._you know...l_ike _that. _And also...very _yeah..._and most importantly he's...uh...he's...umm...?"

Father peered at me, a brow arched as he listened, "He's..."

"..._Tall._" I finished lamely. Suddenly, Bowser stuck half of his torso out of the closet to give me a pointed dirty look. Had I not been trying my best to ignore him, I would have laughed. When I looked in Bowser's direction again, he was perfectly camouflaged.

"..._Tall_?" Father asked skeptically, a single brow arched," Aren't most of your suitors tall? At least those young _mongrels_ got _that_ right."

I half-laughed, "_Dad?_! Don't be so harsh!"

"What?" He sniffed indignantly, turning his head away with a touch of hauteur, "I just don't _like_ them."

"The only reason you don't like them," I grinned, "is because I'm going to marry one of them."

"...And your point is?"

"My point is, you, the _great, highly esteemed Emperor Sakuro, _is being absolutely childish," I laughed, "You called them mongrels! Who even uses that word anymore!?"

"Think what you may," he didn't huff, but it was certainly close.

"The equable Sakuro...being petty and frivolous?! Father you got along with the ruler of the BeanBean kingdom who far—_er_ thought his flatulence was funny."

"He isn't trying to marry my daughter."

"_Daaaaad_!" I rolled my eyes, sighing with a smile.

"I can give you a fine list of why _none_ of those men are good enough for you. Firstly, Wolfesbane is uncouth and untamed, Lord Salini is too serious and calculative," he stuck out his third finger as he continued his list of 'why-I-hate-those-young-punks', "Prince Silver is introverted but that's not too bad. Luigi—well actually I have no objections with him. He's a fine young man who I think you should wed."

"Dad! Could you _not_...meddle in my love life!?" I sighed.

"What? What is wrong with Luigi? He is a fine, upstanding young man of good character who loves you even if you're 'unladylike.' And I know his parents are good, hardworking people as well."

I squinted, "Wait a minute...You knew Luigi liked me_ too_?!

I was surprised when Father scoffed, "Apparently you were the _only_ person unaware of his affections for you. And even now you are painfully unaware of _another_ young man—suitor's _obvious_ affections."

I leaned forward curiously, "Who!?"

Dad laughed, "_Chisana_, I think Luigi would be the best match for you. I know his family and they are good people. You would make a smart matching with him. Your outspoken, headstrong ways are sweetly complimented with his docile, mild mannerisms."

"Dad..."

"He is kind and patient and slow to anger and would make a great husband and a father..."

I persisted, "_Dad_..."

"And romantically he will not try to rush you and will always remain mindful your boundaries. Quite frankly he is the only young man who will not try to have premarital relations with you."

"_Dad!_" I blushed.

"Have any of those boys tried anything?!" He glared, "Especially that Koopa King? I am not ignorant of his lascivious past."

I groaned, burying my face in my hands as I blushed red; Bowser was in the closet hearing _every word_ of this. I can't imagine what he was thinking.

"No _Dad_! King Bowser has been good! Can we _please_ end this topic?!"

"Very well then, I shall let you rest. Don't worry about anything_,_" Father soothed, "I will update you about the current situation at a reasonable hour tomorrow morning."

"Okay."

Father pressed a soft kiss to my temporal before swiftly rising to his feet. Warmth sparkled in his eyes, "Sleep well _Chisana_."

"Night Dad," I whispered.

He smiled before turning and shutting the door behind himself. When I turned back around, Bowser was suddenly standing beside me, arms locked and a coil of smoke wafting from his mouth. I was so startled by his sudden appearance I jumped, nearly spilling out of bed, "Bowser! Geesh! Don't scare me like_that_!"

Bowser was busy glaring at the place Father had been prior, "I _knew_ it. I knew that guy hated me. It's too damn obvious in the way he _looks_ at me. After all the people I've double-crossed, swindled, laughed at and gone out of my way to piss off, how does the one guy—I've _intentionally _been semi-nice to—have the _nerve_ to hate my guts?!_ What the hell_?! Where is the justice in all of this?!"

I stared at him askance; I'm not seeing how that helped his case. Bowser's kidnapped my cousin for the entire duration of her life, he's brazenly flipped off cameras on live television, spouted some of the most vulgar—albeit _funny_—catch phrases, plundered galaxies but after all of that, Bowser's mad 'cause my dad is _mildly suspicious_ of him.

_Take a seat Bowwy._

I sighed, "He doesn't _hate _you..."

"He does."

"He does not!"

"He does."

"Does not!"

"Does—" he suddenly grimaced, clenching his side and growled an angry, guttural slew of Darklandian profanities. The bright red glow of the Red Essence was beginning to fizzle out. Without the invincible serum, he would be back into a world of pain. I darted out of bed and to his side but he was a prideful, obstinate creature and immediately turned away from my touch, "I'm _fine_, Flower."

"Hey, don't hurt yourself anymore," I joked, "I still need you around."

He smirked, though it was considerably forced, "Yeah...?"

"Yes, I think you need rest. It's late and you need all the strength you can get. It's time for bed and tomorrow is going to be one _helluva _day."

Bowser laughed tiredly, "Alright then. Scoot over so Big Daddy can slide on in—"

"To _your _bed," I gave a pointed look as a sly grin curled on his lips.

"Flower," Bowser laughed, "You'd forsake the comfort of your own bed and spend the night in mine!? I feel so hon—"

"You have _five_ seconds before I punch you in the side!" I growled.

Bowser laughed, holding his aching side as he did so, "That's _striiiiiike_ three. And the Koopa King goes to the dugout with his tail between his legs. But let it be known folks, he swung for the fences and tried for a homer."

I gave him an incredulous look, "Getting in my bed is a homerun?!"

He smirked wickedly, "Try a _grand slam_, Babydoll."

I blinked and he rolled his eyes, going as far as groaning and smacking his palm against his forehead. He laughed so hard until he clutched at his side,"..So ...friggin'..._dense_..."

"Did I just miss something?"

"No, besides missing _everything_, no. You sleep well Flower..."

"Hey Bowser?"

He turned to look at me. I smiled, "Dad's wrong, you are a good Koopa."

He smirked, standing up a little straighter, "That's all I needed to hear. Sleep well _Daisy."_

I froze, surprised when he said my name of all things. It seemed way more intimate than my nickname. He shot one last wink my way before turning and walking out.

"...Night," I whispered.

My door was closed gently as I went to crawl into bed. I turned out the lights and peered up at my ceiling, replaying tonight's events. I took a deep sigh and closed my eyes, trying to force myself to sleep. I was going to need all the sleep I could get because tomorrow was going to be _crazy._

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><p>Alice: Thanks for reading again! Leave a review! I hope it was worth the loooong wait!<p>

Ultrra: OMG! Was Empress Meringue not THE most badass thing EVER!? XD She hit a guard in the RIBS with a STEEL PIPE. XD She is now my favorite OC EVER. EVER!

Alice: Yeah! No one messes with Grammy! O_O X)

Ultrra: Lol! You guys leave a review!


	27. Kingdom Tour: Sarasaland

Alice: Hey everyone! Thanks for all the adds, reviews, and the gentle nudges to update! We just hit one of my landmark goals! 100 favs! The only bad news is that Ultrra is sick with the flu and has been the biggest baby about it.

Ultrra: I'mb not sik. I feel just fineb. (sniffles) -_-

Alice: Riiiiiiight. He's just _fineb. _X) You know, anytime someone adds/reviews/follows/favorites the story, this is what I do: I'm like 'hey yeah!' And then I'm like 'hmm, who is this person?' And check out their profile! ^_^

Ultrra: That sounds creepy XD (laughs then ends in coughs)

Alice: And _you _sound like you're dying.

Ultrra: I'mb fineb.

Alice: Just admit you're sick!

Ultrra: I'mb not. I just have a cough.

Alice: And a fever

Ultrra: And a small sneeze.

Alice: -_- I'm going to cut this short since someone is in denial. Has anyone played super smash brothers? Yes?

Ultrra: And if you haveb, Alice and I will take friends codes. XD Well, we will when the 2014 one comes out.

Alice: In SSBB if you've played the space emissary game, there's an enemy called a Towtow. It's the ram that sleeps but if you wake it up it goes on the rampage. XDD I'm borrowing THAT sheep, ram enemy for this chapter. XD

Ultrra: I thought it was a goat...

Alice: It's a ram...Oh! And the only warning for this chapter is language, though it's not worse than usual.

Ultrra: (blows nose loudly)

Alice: XD LOL! You sound like a snowstorm! Anyways, enjoy the chapter! ^_^

Ultrra: (chugs down cough syrup like a shot)

Alice: XS Gross...

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo **

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><p>I hadn't received more than three hours of sleep when a maid summoned me early the next morning. I arrived at a courtroom where Father and the Grand Sarasalandian council waited.<p>

The courtroom was unwelcoming and cold; the room was dark, save for a few lamps and glutted with a crushing somber ambience. Father had the suitors and I relay our narratives at CLUB VICE as a royal scribe carefully recorded each word.

One by one we took turns, sitting before the panel of esteemed Desert elders, and under the room's solitary light, the elders' faces were solemn and their eyes were blackened out in shadows. Each royal filled in the blanks with their own perspectives, noticing and omitting varying events.

The accounts remained indisputably true at certain junctures: We had traveled to CLUB VICE where Taurus bought us all a round of drinks, then he led us to the VIP lounge where Bowser and Wolfe had inexplicably disappeared from the main party.

Afterwards Wolfe had burst into the VIP in a fit of rage, dragging a half-conscious Koopa king. I left the room with Taurus only to return five minutes later with a torn dress and shortly afterwards Grammy entered the VIP lounge and we all left.

Though the Elder council suspected foul play, Wolfe's narrative was the only account to support the claim. The Elders were wise, knowing an accusation without any concrete proof was not only political suicide but was breeding grounds for war.

The Elders shrewdly chose not to disturb Bowser, permitting him a well-deserved rest. And although Bowser wasn't present, notes from our family's physicians supported the theory of underhanded Aqualandian activity.

Large traces of rohypnol were found in his bloodstream, enough in fact to have knocked out several adult men. The Elder council wouldn't even dream of disturbing Grammy, especially since the family physician had ordered for her to remain undisturbed.

Was it odd that I felt as if I was on trial? When I sat before the Elder council and Father, they remained stone-faced, unsympathetic and the dim, cold courtroom seemed more suiting for a criminal instead of a tired, sleep-deprived princess.

I felt enormously uncomfortable with informing them of Grammy's unspeakable past. It didn't seem as if it was even my proper place to do so, and I decided to omit that from my narrative. What really took half an hour tops felt like days had passed and by the time all accounts were given, the suitors looked exhausted.

Father thanked each of us for our cooperation and advised us to rest. Breakfast would be served today at ten am so we could all nab a few hours of sleep. The Sarasalandian council and Father would remain in deliberation, piecing together and using our narratives to create one, unbiased story to figure out what their next move would be.

I didn't think twice; with the thick fog of exhaustion clouding my head and emotions, I barely managed to bid my suitors a goodnight before returning to my room.

When I reached the doors to my bedchamber, there were two handwritten notes taped to my door. The first note had a white lotus blossom taped to it and immediately I knew who had written the note.

_Deji-Hime,_

_I know this is hard, but your valor and poise is admirable. Keep your head up and never give up. It may seem unlikely but this all will pass. If you need someone to speak with, or just want someone who will listen, I'm here. On a lighter note, I hope you enjoy the blossom. They grow in abundance at home during the summer rain season. Whenever I feel homesick, I carry one or two of them with me. I hope this one can make you feel better._

~龍Ryu

I smiled, twirling the elegant flower within my digits. Its perfumed, sweet petals smelt heavenly. I picked up the second note and laughed. Though this memo wasn't written in the same, elegant handwriting as the first. If anything, it was messy and the letters were lopsided and scrawled in a hurry.

_D,_

_I saw that sneaky Shinobi leave a note by your door and thought I would check it out. Y'know, just to make sure he didn't attach a bomb or write a dirty note or something...Also, I would be DAMNED if he left you a note and I didn't! You looked so tired and worried and I hope this could make you feel a little better. Here's hoping I'll get to see that cute smile soon! (:D)_

_-Wolfe_

I released a tired laugh, neatly folding the notes up and setting them on my nightstand. The moment I touched my bed, I drifted off into a deep, dreamless sleep. I think we were all tired and hoping to put this long, ugly day to rest.

* * *

><p>Someone once told me that there was no rest for the wicked, and with the sudden media explosion, I think there was a lot of truth to the old saying. Even before dawn of the next day, the tabloids and media were abuzz in a wild, speculative flare.<p>

The crazed speculation that flooded through the media were not only inane, but completely untrue: Wolfe and Taurus were involved in an underground fight club, Taurus and I had got into a fight because I was pregnant with his child, and my favorite one yet, Taurus and I were secret lovers. There wasn't a single television program, news report, or headline that wasn't talking about CLUB VICE.

The disaster at CLUB VICE had already spread like wild fire and it was the juicy topic for today—and probably until something more scandalous came along. It would probably be well-talked about even a month or two from now. CLUB VICE's president had issued several statements in the face of the bloodthirsty press, reassuring that they'd do their best to investigate the matter.

The high Protectorate Salini issued a statement to the public, promising that the incident at CLUB VICE was nothing more than a misunderstanding that was quickly and efficiently being sorted out. No rash judgments or actions should be taken and Emperor Sakuro would hold a press conference announcing Sarasaland's intentions once the appropriate choice of action was decided.

The sun had barely risen and already Father had received millions of intrusive calls from loquacious reporters. A dangerously enormous congregation of meddlesome, bloodthirsty paparazzi clogged our front gates, cameras glittering from snapped photos as they aggressively demanded an interview with Father, me, the suitors or anyone involved in the CLUB VICE fiasco.

Some of them even tried to climb the gate—that is until they met Toadux who was waiting on the other side, smiling darkly and flashing an all too obvious taser that reeked of pain and several amps of electricity.

Some of the more bold—_stupid_—paparazzi had tried to worm their way through security and tried to skulk around the palace grounds to dig around for anything they could find. The most disturbing behavior I heard involved a few of the paparazzi rifling through our trash.

Who the _hell _does _that_!?

Father was holed up all morning—finally taking the _important_ calls—from the worried Moonstonian representatives, answering messenger hawks that flew in from the Hidden Lotus Village, and sighing through a frantic, teary phone call from uncle.

_"Ahhhhhhh! Sakuroooooooooo! My Stars Sakky!" _it was obvious King Apricotto was sobbing, wailing_, "What happened!? I heard Daisy was killed! Or pregnant! Or both?! You're supposed to protect her! My Stars, this _totally_ credible website said Daisy was a princess by day and a stripper at night?! It's the same website that said Mario was really the legendary bigfoot! Where did we go wroooooong!?"_

Then there was sounds of a struggle—as if someone was forcibly prying the overemotional King away from the phone line—and a calmer, more professional Toadsworth took over.

_"AHEM! Apologies on behalf of our King, but I cannot help but mirror his worry. I've heard nothing but idle rumor—poor speculation if you can even call it that—and the media seems to enjoy feasting upon travesties. Both your Niece and I are starving for the truth of the matter."_

I heard when Lady Kitsune called, she had been so loud, so furious that her roars and swears could be heard through Father's sealed office doors. She had threatened to violently choke out the Aqualandian monarchy for harming Wolfe and was also creative enough to attach a threat about shoving her foot into unpropitious places.

_"Emperor is it true!? Some punkass tried to jump my Wolfe!? Well ain't that something!? I swear to the Stars I'm gonna find 'em. And when I do...I'm gonna find those watery bastards and shove my foot up their—No I will NOT calm down!"_

Father had managed to soothe and calm her into not making any rash actions and promised her that Wolfe was perfectly safe within the Sarasalandian borders. And understandably, the Darklands had been _pissed_.

I had learned quickly that the Darklandian legislation worked like so: at the pinnacle was the king, the most powerful entity and just below Bowser in the chain of command were the councilors. As the Darklands contained five separate burrows, there were five different councils. The Coallands, Firelands, Steellands, Smokelands and Ashlands burrows respectively had their own council who answered to Bowser.

Well, four of the five Darklandian councils were concerned about their king's welfare, simply wanting him withdrawn from Sarasaland as soon as possible. They held the Aqualands solely accountable, but this was not the case for my _favorite_ burrow, the Firelands of course.

The Firelands let it be known loud and clear that they were outraged, holding Sarasaland equally responsible for a threat on their king's life as they did the Aqualands. I had the sinking feeling that the Firelands were simply looking to drive a nail into the coffin and if I had to take a guess, they were trying to find _any_ reason to break the Sarasalandian-Darklandian alliance.

Even in the face of the Firelands' threatening posturing, Father had adroitly assured all foreign diplomats with an enviable, infectious poise that their heirs were perfectly safe within the Sarasalandian borders.

He was terribly apologetic for any inconveniences the whole event had created and gently reiterated avoiding any rash judgments. Father would hold a live press conference as soon as Sarasaland came to a finalized conclusion.

While Father wrestled against the press, media and fellow royals, that very same morning I had received several phone calls from Peach. Moved by familial concern, she checked in to see how I was fairing.

_"My Stars Daisy, what happened? Are you okay!? I was so worried about you, I heard there was a fight...and Bowser was hurt badly. Father, Mario and I are going to come for a visit soon, you hear? We should arrive first thing tomorrow morning. And we're going to have a nice relaxing girls' day out together, alright?"_

The next phone call was from Mario; I'm positive Peach made him call to make sure both Luigi and I were okay, _"Daisy, it's-a me. Peach called and let-a you know we're going to stop by for a visit soon-a, right? Brava! Those paparazzi are landsharks eh? I remember when they-a made a rumor about me and Peach eloping! The king-a didn't talk to me for a week-a after that! Mama Mia...I'll see you tomorrow-a. Ciao."_

I was surprised, yet touched when so many Darklandians called my cell and left messages. Wendy called, with Junior and the other Koopalings in the background spewing funny phrases.

_"Dai, it's like Wendy. Are you okay? We've heard all about the thing at CLUB VICE!"_

_"Hiya Mama Daisy! Can you hear me? Hiya!"_

_"Like, that's Brat Junior. He's been like _bugging_ me to call you. Please Mushroomskype me or like something. We're all really worried."_

_"Mama, Miss Kammy told me King Dad wasn't feeling well. When I don't feel well I always eat soup. Make sure he gets some soup, 'kay?"_

_"Yo, yo, yo Mamacita! It's Lemmy!"_

_"And it's-a me Mario! Heh, I'm just kidding, it's-a Larry!"_

_"Yo, we heard about what happened yesterday. We were just curious but, do we gotta go to the Aqualands and...beat some _ass_!?"_

_"And they won't like us when we're beating their ass."_

_"We'll be two steppin' on their asses."_

_"How many more times can we say ass in a sentence!?"_

_"Like, will you losers shut up!?"_

_"HUH!? Did you hear that Lemmy!?"_

_"I certainly couldn't Larry! Not over Wendy's loud makeup!"_

_"...Stars. I'm about to like, hang-up now. I hope to hear from ya soon Dai. And I mean it. My like, Mushroomskype screen name is LaFashionistafabulosa. Talk to you later."_

Koopie, Parry and Auntie Lina called and left reassuring messages on my voicemail as well. I knew things were bad when Parry offered a free trip to his salon and Koopie promised a cake 'on the house.'

I listened to my last message and at first I wasn't sure who it was from; the message held no words, but was someone playing my favorite lullaby on the piano. The song was executed, played with a beautiful precision that, if possible made me adore my favorite song even more.

Then I smiled, realizing it was the blue-maned, stoic conductor. After he played the five-minute ballad, I barely heard his soft, deep murmur.

"..._Feel better, Princess Daisy."_

* * *

><p><em>"Silver, how have you enjoyed your trip, beloved?"<em>

The elegant, fair face of Queen Titania peered back at Silver from the video phone screen. As snowflakes fluttered lazily behind the windows of her cozy office, Titania tilted her head in such a way that her pale hair appeared to have melted into the fresh backdrop of white snow.

Silver answered back in the soft lifts of his native language, "_It has been wonderful, Mother. Princess Daisy is just as kind and as wonderful as we have believed her to be."_

_"And her father? Is he as brilliant as I have heard?"_

_"Quite possibly even more so. Emperor Sakuro is judicious and very courteous. He is both stern and gentle within the same token."_

"_That's wonderful,"_ Titania's eyes crinkled at the corners, "_And I'm glad to see you're okay. Silver_...?"

He peered up, smiling softly, "_Yes?"_

Titania wordlessly opened her mouth, rethinking her next words, "_Silver...the council and I have been in long deliberation over this...And we think it's best..."_

_"If?"_

Her expression became somber, "_If you left Sarasaland. A servant will arrive tomorrow near dawn."_

Silver froze, almost not trusting what he had heard, "_What!?"_

"_Don't fight your mother on this,"_ The Moonstonian queen never raised her voice, even when angry; but she certainly had a tone that spoke of her authority, "_Tensions are high and it's unsafe to be there any longer. We do not distrust Sarasaland but this is for the best."_

Flummoxed, Silver remained silent, feeling as if someone had thrown wool over his eyes. How could he leave here? As a prince who rarely left his castle grounds and had very little contact with the world outside of his palace walls, this whole experience had felt like a wondrous leap of freedom.

He had made friends—and the wealthy, uncaring political acquaintances didn't count—true friends with Wolfe and Luigi whom he planned to still keep contact with outside of Princess Daisy's courtship.

Then there was the wonderful, funny, outgoing princess who he could see himself courting. Someone who, the thought of being bonded to in an arranged marriage didn't sound all that bad.

Women of the Moonstonian court were polite and docile, delicate much like snowflakes; pretty and fragile. Whereas Princess Sarasaland, a girl of the desert was strong, fiery and outspoken in a manner that was alien to a Moonstonian woman. Silver blinked, realizing his mother was still carrying on a list as to why he had to leave.

_"Mother..."_

"_What if the Aqualands attacks again?"_ she frowned.

"_Mother!"_

"_This is a final decision and I will not hear otherwise_," Titania deadpanned, blue eyes two shades darker and her mouth drawn into an unyielding, tight line.

Silver remained silent, staring back at her with a face void of emotion. If she and the council had come to the decision already, then it might as well have been written in stone. Silver closed his eyes and took a deep breath; he was upset, but rarely did giving into his anger ever yield desirable results.

Titania's expression lightened marginally, "_Just...Just let things cool off, okay? This is not the end of your courtship. Things just need to settle there first, alright_?"

Silver barely whispered back, _"Okay. If...that's what you wish..."_

Queen Titania eyed him silently, taking in her son's closed expression, "_I love you little Snowflake and though I want your happiness, your safety comes first. I will see you soon."_

_"Alright. See you soon Mother."_

"_Enjoy your last day there_," she smiled, "_Bye, beloved_."

"_Bye Mother..."_

Silver quietly released the receiver. He took a deep breath before wistfully peering out the window.

* * *

><p>Wolfe thoughtlessly wrapped his knuckles against the desk beside the phone, frowning. He scratched impatiently at an uncomfortable bandage that disappeared beneath his shirt.<p>

He sighed impatiently as Puppo paced in front of him. The Chow pup barked, grabbing Wolfe's attention, "Huh? Oh yeah, I dialed the correct number."

Puppo barked again, causing Wolfe to roll his eyes, "_Yes _Puppo, the phone_ is_ ringing. I'm not an idiot you know."

Then Puppo barked something else, "_Hey_! You talkin' smack Pups!? You better be able to back that up! I'm gonna—" Wolfe paused, realizing his mom had picked up, "Hey, Ma?"

_"—we can mess around for a little while_," a sensuous, low feminine voice purred with silk, "_Sage is giving ya dirty looks? Well then I'll tell Sage to chase some damn squirrel—and he'll actually do it—and we can be alone. Didya bring those chocolates I wanted? Mmm, yeahaha melt it down baby and we can get a little crazy—"_

"_Oh Stars Ma_!" Wolfe nearly shrieked, his voice reaching a new octave he didn't think possible, "I can _hear_ you!"

The voice on the other side of the phone paused until an excited, genuine, "_Hey Wolfie! How are ya kiddo!?"_

"Well, I _was _good until I heard _that_," Wolfe muttered under his breath, "I feel like I gotta dunk my brain in bleach to forget that."

_"What was that boy?"_

"I said I'm _swell_ Ma!" Wolfe boomed with fake mirth.

"_Good. So I finished talking to King Pretty-hair and it looks like shit went down yesterday."_

"Yeah," Wolfe frowned, studying his bandaged left hand. Thank the Stars he was ambidextrous, but he was a lefty and beneath the thick cotton bandages, his left knuckles were busted and discolored with bruises.

As a Canine warrior he had been taught the proper way to punch without abusing his knuckles but yesterday he had been _so _pissed that all training had flew out the door.

_"Sakuro filled me in; you told him what happened and I've watched the channel five news; boring-ass show if you ask me. And why do Highlanders wear stupid looking suits!? Tch. Well, I want to hear the story from you."_

Wolfe laughed, knowing good and well that the Northern Canine territories had no electricity. In fact only the Western territories of Land's End had electricity, which was a thirty minute trek from their home.

Even then the facilities available were very humble; there was an outdated 1940's black and white television and an antique phone few barely knew how to use—you spun the phone's numbers or something _weird_—and the Canines didn't even bother with the intricacies of the internet.

Wolfe rehashed his side of the story, not realizing how tired he was of having to do so. His mother remained silent through it all, though every now and then he'd hear Sage growl something to her.

"_Hmm..."_ Kitsune sucked her teeth, "_I always knew there was something off with those Fish bastards. Well kid, I've got news for ya and you probably ain't gonna like it. Not one bit."_

"What is it, Mom? Don't tell me I can't be friends with Daisy anymore."

_"Not that bad. The United Canine Nation voted unanimously to get you back here. You're going to be leaving first thing tomorrow morning, and Sarasaland will hold no ill will."_

Wolfe felt a chill slip down his spine. He gripped the desk's edge tightly with his good hand, trying to reign in his mounting anger. Confused at his ward's anger, Puppo gently tilted his head to the left as Wolfe growled, "Why? _Why _are we going to punish Sarasaland for something the Aqualands did?"

_"I don't make the rules Kid, I just enforce and obey. The safest bet is to get you out of there and I'm sure the other princes will be doing the same thing. First thing tomorrow morning Sage is going to pick you up."_

"If you're worried about me being safe Ma, you should know I kicked all those Aqualandians' asses—"

"_I know you can handle yourself,"_ Kitsune interrupted tersely, "I_ did teach you to fight after all. You whipped much ass already but there's politics at play here. You're coming home and we'll see what happens between Sarasaland and the Aqualands."_

"Alright," Wolfe acquiesced quietly.

"_Hey, don't you give me that puppy pout crap. I know the _exact _face you're making right now."_

Wolfe laughed, "Well what? I'm just not happy about it Mom."

_"Well neither am I. Let's just hope things work out well for Sarasaland, Girly was one of the few Highlanders who didn't rub me the wrong way. Anyways, Sage will pick up you around six am tomorrow morning. Be ready."_

Wolfe nodded solemnly, "Yeah..."

_"...So is it true?"_

"Huh?" Wolfe peered up, "What do you mean?"

"_I heard you kicked in a steel door like a Star damn badass_," He could hear the grin in Kitsune's voice, "_is this true!?"_

Wolfe burst out laughing.

_"That's my boy!"_

* * *

><p>Around ten am I joined my suitors in the dinning commons and ate breakfast with a looming cloud of misery. Even Wolfe, who usually was nothing but sunshine and smiles picked at his food with dulled apathy.<p>

He had removed the bandages from his head though a large cotton cloth bandage remained taped against the side of his cheek, covering his blue tribal tattoo. Every morning Wolfe and Puppo fought over the contents of his plate in a humorous bout of tug-o-war but neither party made a single peep today.

Silver barely touched his tea as Ryu ate silently and Zero read the newspaper with a furrowed brow. I ate more for necessity than true hunger, tastelessly shoveling down one of my breakfast favorites the cooks had prepared to make me feel better.

Luigi peered around the somber table, face scrunched up pensively as he tapped his finger against the table. He suddenly smiled as an idea popped to mind. Lulu brandished his fork, looking around at us all, "You know, this-a food is good! Does anyone-a like the Moonstonian waffles?"

A couple of suitors peered up at him as Luigi shook a plate of waffles enticingly, "_Whoooooo_ wants some-a waffles? Weegee has some wafffffles~! Does anyyyyone like-a waffles? Hmm?"

The banquet hall remained completely silent; Zero promptly ignored him and went back to reading the paper, Wolfe half-shrugged apathetically as Ryu shook his head.

"...Yeah...I like-a the Moonstonian waffles too..." Luigi murmured despondently. I patted Lulu's shoulder reassuringly and he gave a forced smile before returning his attention back to his delicious breakfast.

Then everything was quiet again, save the quiet clinks of cutlery against porcelain plates. Ryu quietly sipped tea, Silver chewed his breakfast, eyes solemn as Zero continued glaring at the newspaper.

I continued to push my food around the plate, trying to congeal the eggs and hash browns into the shape of a continent. I was surprised when Wolfe uttered a soft, low, "Sorry."

All heads turned in his direction and I asked inquisitively, "What are you apologizing for?"

His large, mahogany fists clenched against the marble table top, "...You don't think I haven't seen the frenzy on the news?" Wolfe spoke in a solemn, soft whisper, "The whole thing's on every news station and every headline out there is about my fight with Taurus..."

Zero peered at him skeptically, "Are _you_ taking fault for any of this? I knew you were simple, but not to this extent."

"Wolfe..." Ryu's voice was soft.

"Come on, you don't need to make me feel better," Wolfe glared at his untouched breakfast, "Every headline out there..."

"It's not your f-fault," Silver replied, "I-I don't know why you're apologizing..."

"Although," Zero mused quietly, "No one knows how King Pisces' statue was wrecked oddly enough. I still wonder myself with what happened there..."

Puppo's ears piped up and twitched. Wolfe must have noticed something off as he peered at the tiny Chow sitting on his shoulder, "...What? You look kinda nervous, Pups."

Ryu laughed softly, cerulean eyes warm, "The speculations revolving around the broken statue are hilarious. Some think the ghost of the old Aqualandian queen obliterated it. Makes sense considering how the king was unfaithful to her."

"Alright Princess," Luigi gave a playful stern glance my way, "Did you-a break that statue?"

"What? No!" I shook my head, "That was not me. This is one thing I did _not_ do."

Zero actually laughed, "I've seen Daisy play baseball, and my Stars she's the only one with a swing savage enough to break that thing. Once she threw a football at a maid so hard and knocked her out. The poor woman woke up and though she was a damn tweety bird."

"_What_?" Silver covered his mouth, trying not to laugh.

"It was awful but _damn_ was it funny," Zero smirked, "She was chirping and flapping her arms like wings and everything."

I blushed so hard I could feel heat slipping all the way down my neck as Wolfe, Silver, Luigi and Ryu laughed with a little of their usual mirth. Wolfe's buoyant mood took a sudden sour turn as his features dimmed, "Yeah, well...No matter what you guys say, I feel like I made a bunch of extra work for the Emperor. Everyone knows Sarasaland needs help to fill their wells and the last thing you want is a fight with the Aqualands."

Zero raised both brows, smirking, "Why Wolfe. We're _so _introspective today..."

"And an odd day at that," Ryu grinned, "We all know you're not the right person to be issuing apologies."

I peered at Wolfe and smiled with true warmth, "Don't worry about it, I'm actually kinda worried about your Kingdoms. I wonder if they'll still want to associate with Sarasaland..."

In one single, synchronized movement the suitors froze, gazing at me with collective looks of astonishment. Silver held the steaming cup of tea in hand as he peered at me pensively, "My m-mother and the Moonstonian council w-wish to view your father's press conference before judgments are made. Even now they are sympathetic towards the Sarasalandian p-plight."

"As are the elders of the Hidden Lotus," Ryu chimed in.

"But you're still leaving first thing tomorrow morning, right?" Zero asked listlessly.

"Yeah..." Silver whispered.

"Me too," Wolfe frowned.

Zero shrugged, "Don't look so upset about it. Strategically it's the best move to take. It helps your kingdoms to remain neutral and proactively protect its heirs."

"King Bowser will probably leave as soon as he's better too," Ryu muttered thoughtfully, "It seems I have to get going as well. The Hidden Lotus wishes to remain neutral and it seems withdrawal is the immediate action to take."

I peered at my plate sightlessly; so everyone was leaving? I guess it made sense; who would want to become caught up between the strife of two feuding kingdoms? It was also the safest action to take as well.

Luigi must have sensed my indecision as he reached out and held my hand under the table. I looked up and met his shy, soft smile. His face flushed red, "Princess, I'm-a going to stay here with you..." _We're family._

I smiled, gripping his hand tighter, "Thanks Lulu."

"Ma just about blew up when she heard what happened," Wolfe groaned, rubbing a hand against his forehead wearily, "She's ready to nuke the Aqualands...Huh, looks like your Dad has a lot of responsibility to take care of, eh?"

I nodded in agreement, Wolfe was right; that was a lot of pressure on Father's shoulders. Undecided, impartial kingdoms would look to him, critical of every word and action he made as they made decisions that could either save or break their alliances with Sarasaland or the Aqualands.

The doors to the banquet hall rolled open as Father appeared, stepping through the glowing streams of sun rays as if materializing from their lustrous light, "Good morning gentlemen, _Chisana_, I hope breakfast has been to your liking."

Father strolled in, immaculate white monarch robes trailing behind him in the likeness of mist trailing the sun, and after a night of less than several hours of sleep, he managed to look perfectly kempt; I'm sure a great deal of coffee consumption helped him stave off fatigue.

Wolfe took one look at Father and rose to his feet so fast he nearly knocked his chair over. The Canine heir barreled across the room until he was in front of Father. Father blinked, astonished when Wolfe gripped his shoulders so tightly that his knuckles began to bleed white.

Maids gasped and a few of the servants lingered unsurely; there was an unspoken rule that the emperor of Sarasaland—or any monarch for that matter—was not to be touched. Zero rose out of his seat, eyes sharp and looking more than ready to chew Wolfe out.

"Emperor Sakuro! I'm so _sorry_ for everything that happened!" Wolfe spoke so fast and with so much anxiety that Zero froze, "I didn't think everything would blow up like this! I-I thought I did the right thing and only wanted to help King Bowser and your daughter! Oh man, I've really screwed this up—"

Father pressed a reassuring hand onto Wolfe's shoulder. Wolfe shut up mid-thought, and finally peered up at Father, golden eyes shining and wide with conflicting emotions, "Lord Wolfesbane, I find an apology from you completely unnecessary. If there is to be an admission of guilt then I'm afraid it's coming from the wrong party."

Wolfe's brows shot up, eyes growing round, "But—!"

Father smiled softly, raising a hand to silence him, "We shall not speak another word of this. I believe your actions were completely justified and that your bravery played a pivotal role in saving King Bowser's life. Don't you all agree?"

Father gave a pointed look around the table as the other suitors quickly picked up the invitation and smiled, or nodded their agreement.

"You did a great thing Wolfe," I smiled, "Don't let any of this media stupidity change that."

"Um...I s-second what the princess said," Silver peered up at Wolfe with a small smile, "I-I felt brave enough to help King Bowser yesterday b-because I was inspired by you."

Zero sighed with false exasperation, "For the umpteenth time. It's _not _your fault."

Father's words had a medicating effect and seemed to relax Wolfe. Wolfe's customary sunny, large smile spread across his face; even his shoulders seemed less stiff than before.

The Canine heir beamed, "Aww thanks guys! Y'know, you're really good with words, sir. You should be a motivational speaker or something..."

"Or he should be a _king_, or maybe an emperor," Zero spoke blankly, "Where being a good orator would be paramount."

Father gently guided Wolfe back to the table and motioned for him to take his seat. Father even had the mind to gently shoo off the servants who had been carefully watching, "I've had years of practice. However we have more important things to discuss. Such as how no one in this room shall sulk any further. Today I want you all to relax. As I assume today is your last day here, and if that's the case, you all will enjoy your final day in the palace."

"Yeah!" Wolfe pumped a fist into the air, "We're gonna have fun! So...what are we doin' today?"

A servant stepped into the room with an uncomfortable look on his face. Father motioned him to speak, "Servante, it seems you have an announcement to make...?"

"Sire," the old servant cleared this throat agitatedly, "Master Kooples wishes to join the others for breakfast, if that is alright with you...?"

"Of course," Father nodded.

"Milord, Master Kooples would also like to announce," the stiff servant looked terribly uncomfortable, "_Ahem_...that he successfully went..._potty_."

Kooples corroborated the announcement with a cheerful chirrup. Luigi and I bust up laughing at Servante's awkward announcement.

"Well _alright_ Little Man!" Wolfe cheered, as Puppo barked happily.

"The little one must be hungry," Father spoke gently, "Please bring the Koopaling to the table if you will. Also, he may require a highchair, bring one will you?"

"At once, Sire."

Kooples sucked on his thumb, bubby bright eyes eagerly taking in everything as Servante walked him over to the table. The tiny Koopaling took in all the strange new faces of the grown-ups watching him. A booster seat was pulled up to the table and with Wolfe's help, the little tyke was gently hoisted into his chair.

Kooples happily babbled, slapping his tiny palms against the chair as he awaited his meal. He happened to peer in my direction as I met his curious stare with a smile and a wave.

The maids brought in brightly-colored baby utensils along with a tiny bowl of porridge that had chunks of bananas cut into a funny smiling face. Wolfe and Luigi were busy babytalking Kooples, trying to feed the Koopaling.

"He's quite well-behaved," Father muttered softly.

"Have you eaten breakfast yet, Father?" I asked him.

"No not yet, I'm having a late breakfast delivered to my room after this," Father hummed.

Luigi peered at dad, "So what's on-a the itinerary, Emperor?"

"Originally Lord Salini was to take Princess Sarasaland on a romantic outing," Father replied, "Of course this was all planned to happen before the incident in the Aqualands."

"That's r-right," Silver thoughtfully munched on a bagel, "Lord Zero is the last s-suitor a-and we are to tour his kingdom."

"That's odd, considering Princess Daisy and Lord Zero live in the same Kingdom, let alone work in the same palace," Ryu mused. He joined Wolfe, shaking a baby rattle in front of Kooples, who babbled loudly at the new sound.

Zero shook his head, "Following me around all day would be boring. Besides, Princess Sarasaland knows where I work, has been to my family villa...I couldn't ask for her to accompany me anywhere, not with everything that's going on. The Palace is the safest place for her."

I peered at Zero quizzically; was he showing _concern_ for me? I stared at him sharply for a few seconds before turning back to my own plate.

There was another happy baby squeak and I looked up, realizing Kooples had his chubby arms out, reaching in my direction. Father passed an amused glance my way, "And I see you're a baby charmer _Chisana_."

"He wants you!" Wolfe laughed softly, "Here, let me get the lil' guy down. Easy does it Kooples."

The second Wolfe pulled him out of the highchair, Kooples tottered over towards me, peering up with large, bright eyes. Kooples studied me quietly, thumb popped in his mouth. He hovered nearby before deciding he trusted me and with no invitation or decorum, began to try to scale his way up my lap.

He grabbed onto my legs and dress, trying to climb with as much elegance as a drunken rhino. Ryu, Silver and Luigi laughed as Wolfe leaned over to Luigi and whispered jokingly "Lucky lil' _jerk_, I've been tryin' to end up in her lap for a while now!"

I laughed, carefully scooping up Kooples and gently depositing him into my lap. I began to bounce my knee as he continued to suck his thumb, peering around the large banquet hall, eyes aglow with infantile wonder.

"I see you're g-good with children," Silver's eyes were bright, and a soft smile upon his lips.

"_Me_?" I laughed, handing Kooples a grape he had been reaching for, "I'm not sure about that. Though I guess I am used to Koopalings."

That was the truth; after being around Bowser's children for so long, was it odd I felt closer, more endeared to Koopalings than to human children?

I had spent many afternoons playing with Junior, and was rewarded the tender privileges of reading him bedtime stories, playing games I hadn't since girlhood and even pulling out a wiggly baby incisor.

With the older Koopalings I enjoyed lending an open ear to their problems, helping them face crushes and keep secrets they didn't want their dear ole dad to know about.

"It's not surprising," Ryu spoke, "King Bowser introduced her to his Koopalings and she seems very close to his children."

Silver nodded his agreement; note to self, the suitors have noticed and hallmarked my relationship with the Koopalings. I wonder if they were fascinated with my possible maternal instincts or if they were worried about me being too close to another man—Koopa's—children?

"How about we follow around Princess Daisy for the day?" Zero suggested smoothly, "It would still qualify as a 'tour' of Sarasaland and the Princess and I usually cross paths multiple times during the day. So in a really obscure way it could be identical as following me around."

I ignored Kooples' Koopaling babbles as he tried to reach for my aquamarine jeweled brooch, "Follow me for the day? Like...see what I do in a normal day?"

"Technically today is supposed to be our last tour in Sarasaland," Ryu smirked, "I would like to see what Princess Daisy does for a day. What do you think _hime_?"

"Uh...W-Well, if you want to. I have no problem with it," I peered at my lap, trying to ignore the power of his stare.

Kooples was still busy trying to reach for my brooch but then he grew impatient and began patting my torso like bongo drums, squabbling to get my attention. I immediately handed him a toy rattle to shake the hell out of. And he did so with exuberant glee.

"I vote to follow Daisy for the day!" Wolfe cheered, "It'll be awesome! You got to see what a day in our lives was like, so let's see what life in the palace is like for you!"

Zero checked the watch on his wrist, "It's already eleven, and it looks like we won't even have a full day of activities. Just a few."

I peered at Father for permission, "What do you think, Father?"

"I see no reason why it wouldn't be acceptable," Father mused, "I'll have the servants inform Lady Angora. She'll be thrilled to have five more students accompany her."

"That won't be necessary. I'm already here, Your Eminence," Lady Angora swept into the room quietly, pearl-white dress billowing around her ankles.

She fell into a graceful curtsy before turning to face me. Something amused danced within her feline, sharp eyes, "So I have heard we're going to have extra company today, Princess Sarasaland."

I nodded, "That's true."

Angora peered at my suitors, quirking an elegant eyebrow as her raspberry-red lips curled into a sly grin, "The poor things. They have no idea how badly we shall tire them out. If you thought being a prince was exhausting, then how can you even fathom what being a princess entails?"

* * *

><p>Contrary to all the excuses the doctors had made for him, Bowser remembered last night's events, everything with a wicked amount of clarity. Though the human faces in his memory were blurred and vague, features distorted demonically, he could remember—still <em>feel<em>—the unholy pain the faceless demons had afflicted as they pried his scales apart, pulling him apart the way they would pull apart a crustacean dinner.

They had drugged him so much that they hadn't even allowed him to scream as pain flourished and his body felt as if it was scalding with fire. The Aqualandian demons warned him to stay away from Flower in between bouts of hellish laughter as they carved through his scales with thick, glinting blades.

Worse yet, Bowser could recall the worry glittering in Flower's eyes; she had seen him when he was weak, she had seen that he wasn't the indestructible king she thought he was. All of her suitors had too, especially that pretty boy Shinobi. If humans could do that to him, then how could he protect her?

The thought of Flower imagining him as pathetic had the Koopa King shooting up in bed, fury blazing through his body and flooding his veins with fire.

His fists shook with ill-contained fury as a mixture of fatigue and ire made his head spin and vision blur; he abhorred being weak, and if there was anything worse than being bested by a foe, it was being bested by a cowardly foe.

Those pathetic Aqualandian humans had to drug him; where was the honor, the bravery in that? At least when he was defeated by the plumber blowhard, it was a fair square off.

Though the Darklandian King hated Mario with all his heart and he would never admit it, but along with that same abhorrence, he also held a great respect. But never could he respect the Aqualandians.

They weren't going to beat him. _This_ was not going to beat him. This was _not _going to make him lose face in front of Flower, in front of the suitors, and _especially_ not in front of Emperor Sakuro, who hadn't liked him the day he waltzed into Flower's life.

He was going to show them all that he was powerful, that he was the daunting, inhumane king they thought him as. These wounds were nothing; his own tyrannical, bloodthirsty father had beat him far worse than this. There were innumerable times after his father's 'training' that he couldn't even walk the next day.

A noxious blend of dark determination and ire fueled the wounded king into slowly crawling towards the edge of the bed; he was going to stand, doctor orders be _damned_.

Bowser counted to three in his head before gripping one of the bedposts for balance and slowly attempted to rise from bed. He gingerly lay his first foot on the floor and immediately knew things were going south. He growled in a mixture of irritation and self-deprecation as his healing muscles violently screamed their protest.

The King grimaced, pushing through the pain and set his second foot on the floor, legs strained and pain lancing through him like a bolt of lightning. Bowser gnashed his fangs together, eyes nearly squinted shut in anguish as his head swam and the world swayed precariously; _this. Will NOT. Beat ME._

With a final push and one last searing, vicious riptide of pain that jolted from his feet and raced through his spine, Bowser was finally on his feet and standing upright.

Beads of sweat dotted the side of his face and yet he felt victorious. Bowser released a shaky, weak laugh, "And those bozos in white coats said I wouldn't be able to stand for a week. Huh. What do _they_ know?"

The sound of a ringtone chimed through the air and Bowser realized it was the room's video phone. He recognized the phone number and with a painful stretch, he dragged himself over to the computer screen, more than thrilled to sit down and rest his aching muscles. He pressed _'accept call'_ on the screen and moments later the faces of his two advisors appeared.

Despite the throbbing pain, Bowser smirked, "Hey there old timers, what's up?"

"_My Stars, we heard about CLUB VICE and called you immediately_!" Kamek looked worried, "_And...uh why is it so dark in your room?"_

"I slept in late," and just to add a touch of credibility to his story, Bowser even threw in an over-the-top yawn, "Do you crones know what time it is?"

"_Eleven fifteen on the dot, Sire_," Kammy replied, "_Your split lip looks bad_..."

Bowser laughed, playing it off, "Makes me look dashing, don't you think? You guys think Flower could kiss me there?"

"_Sire, what happened?"_ Kammy's voice was distorted and extra nasally over the video phone, "_We heard of the occurrence at CLUB VICE and we're quite concerned, as you can imagine."_

"_She's right, we spoke to Emperor Sakuro and he assures us that Sarasaland is doing everything in her power to resolve the matter. It's best to speak with you personally,"_ Kamek replied.

"_We'd like to hear the story from you_," Kammy was studying Bowser like a specimen under a microscope, "_Well...?"_

For one of the few times in his life, Bowser didn't like the idea of someone seeing him. Kamek and Kammy would notice his injuries and ultimately he would have to admit to being jumped. Not as if they didn't know that already.

He purposely sat in the dark, unlit room just for that reason. Bowser shifted his weight gingerly, as if to seem casual and relaxed instead of cautious, "I honestly can't remember much. I think I was drunk off my ass the other night."

He was positive Kammy was squinting at him from beneath her spectacles, trying to appraise the truth in his statement. And his lie was so bad, that even Kamek peered at him skeptically as Kammy fired back, "..._Human liquor left you inebriated Sire...?"_

Kamek laughed disbelievingly, "_Bowser! What do you take us for? Fools!? You can down gallons of Koopa liquor and you won't feel a thing! Heh, Kammy, remember that time when he gorged himself on two kegs at the same time—?"_

While Kamek's funny anecdote faded into the background, Bowser was busy thinking of ways to avoid telling his advisors the truth. It would be difficult because though Kamek and Kammy were as different as night and day, each brandishing different strengths and weakness, they both complimented each other perfectly.

One advisor's weakness seemed to be the other's boasting strength. Kamek was personable and jolly; he could make anyone, even the most embittered political rivals like and even trust his grandfatherly warmth.

He was a people's person and undoubtedly well-received by many. Kammy on the other hand seemed like the recondite moon to his bursting sun. Bowser had jokingly referred to her as a bitter, serious shrew, but it was said more in esteem than reprimand.

Kamek may have won his respect through being well-liked but every shred of authority Kammy had was earned and she didn't enjoy 'playing nice.'

Pleasantries were a waste of time and she was calculative, critical and completely methodical. Kamek 'felt' people out, but emotions didn't do a damn thing for Kamelia Koopa.

"..._and then he woke up sleeping next to an emu_!" Kamek quailed with laughter, "_An emu! Do you remember that night, Bowser!? Oh Stars the poor thing was so scared and confused...it had excreted waste everywhere_..."

"_So_," Kammy didn't quite purr her words, but she definitely had an unusual honeyed quality in her voice, "_is that the story you're going to go with, Sire? That you were 'drunk' and can recall absolutely nothing?"_

So while Kamek believed that his ward was indeed drunk last night, because Kamek believed Bowser had no reason to lie to him of all people, Kammy was suspicious because mathematically, shit was _not_ adding up. And it was her job to tie up loose ends.

"Yeah," Bowser didn't sound as convinced as before.

Kammy gave him a pointed look, one that revealed her mounting impatience, "_Drunk? You? Come now Sire, you've horrendously gorged yourself upon gallons of Shellvodka and weren't even close to being tipsy_."

"Hag, I remember bits and pieces of the night," Bowser omitted, "I remember kicking back a drink, hitting on Flower and then being dragged out on someone's back. Probably Dogboy since he seems like the only non-sissy in the group."

Kammy pressed her lips together tightly.

"_Lord. Bowser_," Kammy began in a low, somber tone, "_You are insulting our intelligence, Kamek and I are very well aware that you have been assaulted. We simply wanted to hear from you what had happened. We can help you and you need to understand the gravity of the situation. The entire Darklandian council is trying to decide if they should destroy the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaty. We NEED the truth sire_."

Bowser gnashed his teeth in frustration, growling deep in his throat as pride ate him up like acid. Kamek became sober as Kammy continued to stare at him blankly, something like disappointment resonating all too clearly on her features.

"Aw _shit_," he growled roughly, "Look...I give. What I say isn't to be repeated to anyone else."

Kamek blinked, "_Of course, Bowser. Now spill."_

Bowser rubbed at his scalp, eyes squinted in irritation, "Shut up and let me talk. I..._kinda_ remember...stuff."

"_Stuff? What stuff_?" Kammy piped up, as Kamek fell silent.

"I remember everything," Bowser growled, his temper beginning to simmer, "And what I tell you, you can't say to anyone else."

_"That's the second time you said that, but yes, sure,"_ Kamek nodded.

And after swallowing gallons of ego, Bowser spilled, telling them everything; he remembered drinking something that made his limbs turn to rubber, and being dragged outside.

He remembered the threatening humans, how they warned him to stay away from Flower and he could recall every excruciating second when they jumped him. He could still feel the blades cutting through his scales and he could still heard their vicious laughter, drunk and merry from his pain.

Kammy and Kamek were stunned into silence as Bowser trembled, a blistering wave of fury and fatigue causing him to feel nauseous. Kammy seemed to come to her senses first, "_It's worse than we thought..."_

"_Stars..."_ Kamek whispered, "You _look worse than that one time when you were fourteen and tried to shave_!"

Bowser glared at him, "I was _fourteen_! Cut me some damn slack, Old man Mcgee! And besides...Koopas don't grow facial hair..."

"_I know!"_ Kamek squeaked, "_And that's what made it so bad!"_

Bowser actually snorted, trying to keep a laugh at bay.

"_Kamek! Focus!"_ Kammy snapped, "_Our King has just been assaulted on foreign soil and yet you can only focus on a silly coming of age anecdote! My Stars, the Darklandian council has been absolutely livid! The council will demand reparation and will happily try to disembowel the Sarasalandian-Darklandian treaty! This could be grounds for war on either Sarasaland or the Aqualandians_."

Bowser snapped to attention as a cold chill slithered down his spine, "What...?"

Kammy appeared worried as she nervously adjusted her opaque spectacles, "_Sire...This entire spectacle isn't going to simply blow over. The entire Darklandian council is going to meet over this. Representatives of all the five burrows—Smoke, Ash, Fire, Steel and Coal—are inquiring about your safety and vehemently demanding you flee the Sarasalandian borders."_

Bowser snorted with little decorum; the last thing the Elders of the Firelands gave a _flying fat fig_—he was trying to watch his swearing for Junior's sake—about was his safety.

If he suddenly combusted into flames out of the blue, they'd probably throw parades and have feasts to celebrate his untimely, fiery demise. And then rage a gory battle as they fought one another to usurp his throne.

Kamek finally spoke, "_Uh...Bowser, the haggardly old shrew has a good point. What are we supposed to say to the councilors? They're all going to wish to speak to you. And they all want you to leave the borders now."_

Bowser closed his eyes, thinking deeply as he crossed his arms, "...Here's the plan. Everyone's seen how jacked up I am. Let's use that to our advantage. Report back to the council and let them all _think_ I'm not stable enough to be transported back yet, make up some goombashit about me hurting and stuff."

Kamek nodded, "_Alright. We can do that."_

"_The councilors of all five burrows are trying to coordinate a date for a meeting. When should we tell them to schedule it for?"_ Kammy asked.

"I'm not sure Hag, but they can't hold it without me there, and even then I've got to '_recover_'. Tell them to give me a week. A week minimum to recover..."

Kammy nodded, "...Very well then."

The king's eyes narrowed as he ran all the scenarios of what could go wrong in his head. He had to think of something quick; the Firelands would be jubilantly trying to dismember the treaty and even the other councilors, those without an ulterior agenda—would demand for him to break off the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaty.

And without the treaty, he couldn't see Flower. In fact destroying their treaty would brew bad blood between their two kingdoms and though it would remain unsaid, they might as well consider themselves as enemies. And even if Flower remained his friend, Sarasaland would demand for her to cut all contact with him.

"_Also your children are worried,"_ Kamek replied, "_What shall we tell them_?"

Bowser sighed; he didn't want his Koopalings to worry, but if he told them all that he was perfectly fine and out of peril, chances were one of them could blab—Junior, Wendy or one of his Koopalings who couldn't keep their pieholes shut—and then word would get out to the wrong Koopa. For the plan to work, everyone had to think he wasn't doing well.

Agitated at the thought of lying to his Koopalings, Bowser growled irritably as he ran a hand through his mane. Stars, he would have to let his Koopalings think him terribly hurt. They'd be scared and anxious, thinking him fatally wounded while all along he'd be peachy keen. _It's official, I'm the biggest slimeball in the world._

"They can't...I can't...lie...to my kids...But I have to..." Bowser frowned, fumbling with his words and thoughts.

Kamek and Kammy understood their king's plight, "_Don't worry sire, we will find a way to let your children know that you are fine."_

"_Recover and get better, Bowser,"_ Kamek spoke in a soft, fatherly tone, "_We'll do everything on our end to keep the heat off of you."_

"For now," Bowser acquiesced quietly.

_"Yes, for now_," Kammy agreed.

And with that, all three of the Darklandian governing officials fell silent. Bowser crossed his arms, glaring off into space; wondering what kind of political moves he'd have to make to keep the Darklands from not only shredding their alliance with Sarasaland, but also not going after them as well.

Whatever the Aqualands had coming, he'd make sure they paid for their actions. He only hoped Flower wouldn't be dragged into the mud for something that wasn't her fault.

* * *

><p>A servant rapped on the door in an overly cheery cadence before the Emperor gave his consent. The door flew open as Alabaster appeared, bowing before returning with a cart filled of fragrant brunch food, "Goooood crazy mid-morning, Emperor Sakuro! Brunch has landed!"<p>

The Toadstool strolled in with a jaunty bounce to his step, humming a tune, "Oh and look what we have here Sire, some nice, piping hot tea, along with Mrs. freshly baked bread and Miss beget," Alabaster playfully shook the tea kettle, pouring the aromatic beverage into its proper saucer, "And look who else has come to see you! It's Miss. Jelly Roll!"

"Many thanks Alabaster," the Emperor spoke quietly, taking a small bite of beget and savored the core of the gooey, warm vanilla filling.

Then a glass pitcher animated by Alabaster's fingers merrily jiggled and bounced its way across the table, "Hello there Mister Emperor Sire!" Alabaster deepened his voice to create a silly, new friendly voice, "I'm Mister Orange Juice. Would you like a cup of my wonderful juice? I'm delicious, healthy and freshly squeezed!"

"Of course," The emperor gestured to the table, "Please join me and Miss Jelly roll if you will."

The orange pitcher jiggled happily at the invitation, "Of course Sire!"

And with that a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice was poured and set beside the Emperor's cutlery. Once the silverware was given one last final polish, Sakuro motioned for Alabaster to help himself to brunch.

With an all too obvious gasp of delight and starry eyes, Alabaster hurriedly filled his plate, piling on cream begets until they grew into an unstable leaning tower. He filled a cup to the brim and began to eat.

Sakuro watched with cool amusement as Alabaster savagely wolfed down begets and drained half a glass of OJ within several seconds. The emperor finally showed the first signs of interest in his meal, raising the glass of orange to his lips, "Alabaster?"

"Whuf?" Alabaster was too busy stuffing his face and trying to jam food down his throat.

Too busy in fact to notice the way his king was watching him critically, "I have a favor to ask of you."

"Uhuh..."

The Emperor took a small sip, still watching Alabaster stuff himself silly, "I would like you to deliver brunch to one of our prestigious guests. He's a powerful monarch and it is best that Sarasaland show our reputable hospitality."

Alabaster finally swallowed, greedily eyeing more pastries, "Which floor is he on, Sire? _My Stars_ did Mrs. Pan cook the hecker doodles out of this food or what?! Or what obviously! Haha, kidding! _Mmhmm!_ I just don't know how you don't get fat off of this food!"

"Fencing, archery, and judo," the emperor answered offhandedly, "By the way our guest is residing on the fifth floor."

Alabaster finally stopped shoveling food into his face and choked down his meal in one large, unflattering swallow. He peered into space with a pensive mien before something mentally clicked into place, "Uh...Sir..._King Bowser_ resides on that floor. I repeat. _King. Bowser_."

The Emperor's unusually sly, growing smirk made Alabaster explode, "Oh, ohohohoho _noooo_! Nope! Uh uh! I _ain't doing it!_ You've got the _wrooong_ Toad Sire! I want to live a long life!"

"Don't you think the theatrics are a little overdone?"

"Theatrics!?" The Toad gasped, "Sire, you haven't _seen_ anything yet! I'm going to act crazy if it gets me out of doing this! I've done tons of odd—and, to be _honest_— weird jobs around the palace. You remember that time I gave the King of Cheeseland a belly rub? And don't forget when I had to serve the Piranha King. He drooled over everything! But this? Serving King Bowser brunch!? I draw the line here!"

Alabaster even pretended to hold a large invisible pencil and drew an invisible line, "_See that_!? Did you catch that motion I just did!? That was me drawing the _friggin'_ line, Sire!"

The Emperor chuckled, watching the babbling servant with a secretive grin that only served to egg Alabaster on, "Oh and don't _even_ give me that look! 'Cause no matter what you say or do, I will _never_—I repeat—will _never _be two inches _near _King, big, fat, bad-tempered Bowser and that's _final!_"

* * *

><p>Unsurprisingly, Alabaster found himself standing outside of King Bowser's guestroom not more than ten minutes later.<p>

"Oh big...fat..._doodle bugs_!" Alabaster swore violently under his breath, then he raised a fist towards the heavens and shook it in a show of rage, "I want a raise after _this_!"

Alabaster nearly chewed his tongue off in fear as he heard the Koopa king's deep, resonant voice through the door, speaking to something or someone. Alabaster clenched his eyes tight, biting on his finger nails as his imagination not only ran away from him, but fled to an entirely different planet.

_Why do I have to feed this guy?! He's mean and big and fat and flipped off cameras on live television! Who does that kind of stuff!? Someone who's gonna END ME, that's who! Aww, Stars why!? I want to liiiiiiiive! And have children! And marry Princess Peach! But how can I when I'm DEAD!?_

_...Besides, I don't think she's into dead guys. I mean if she is then, hey, better for me, but that's still kinda weird._

Alabaster let out a tiny whimper that was loud enough to rouse the demon King's attention, "Hold on, I think I heard _something_."

_Oh doodly doodle bugs!_

Alabaster nearly wet himself and began to assume the fetal position as the gigantic, booming footsteps drew nearer with an ominous assurance. The door creaked open with overdue strain and suddenly the looming, hulking form of King Bowser was revealed.

Long, dark shadows crisscrossed against his frame, blacking out his eyes and making him appear as sinister as an undertaker. Alabaster started humming koopakumbaya in a frantic, shaking hum; he was dead. Royally, _DEAD_.

"I h-hope I don't wet myself," Alabaster squeaked, "I-It's bad enough that I'm a-about to croak. But p-please Stars, it's just that much more _worse_ to shame myself when I croak!"

Bowser peered at the whimpering mass near his feet with a skeptical glare, barely arching a brow; was this a _normal_ thing for Toad's to do everytime they saw him?

Curl into tiny balls and shake like malnourished Chihuahuas? The King snorted, turning his head away from him in a manner close to disgust, "What in the world are you _doing_?"

"G-G-G-G-Good morning King Bowser! O-Oh Handsome King. W-W-Who is the most masculine K-Koopa to have ever walked the globe," Alabaster laughed, completely scared out of his mind.

"That's all common knowledge," Bowser grunted, "Why are you bothering me?"

"I-I-I-I've brought you brunch—B-B-But I don't mean _me_—I am _not_ your brunch!" Alabaster instantly squeaked, shaking his head frantically, "Besides...I'd probably taste bad...l-like Cataquack...puke...y-yeah. I'd taste that badly!"

Bowser stared at the trembling Toad for a moment before rolling his eyes with agitation. Why were these pansy Toads so afraid of him?

In his history of terrorizing and pillaging, the only time he _may_ have accidentally injured a Toadstool was when he slipped, fell backwards and sat ass-first onto a Toad. Even then that only happened because the idiotic Shroomhead hadn't been smart enough to flee.

"Whatever, Shrimp. Serve brunch then," and with that, Bowser turned and stomped into his guestroom suite, leaving the door ajar, "Crones give me a second, some puny _weirdo_ is getting food. I was kinda hoping it was Flower...in a bikini or something."

After gathering his wits, Alabaster rose from the floor and shakily pushed the food cart into the room. The cart was filled with several trays of food and three gallons of orange juice.

And for a moment Alabaster's fear was forgotten as he eyed the towering stack of food, "Are you _really_ going to eat all of that? That just seems...unhealthy. And gluttonous. It's like you're trying to get fat."

"What's unhealthy is how you run your mouth so damn much," Bowser snorted.

"You know...I know this good psychiatrist you can talk to about your obvious eating problem," Alabaster tried to sound helpful, "And it's completely confidential. They won't put your business in the streets and they won't make you feel bad at all."

Undeterred, Bowser continued to shovel food into his face viciously and then opened the gallon of orange juice like a soda can, chugging it all down in one go. Alabaster looked dually disgusted and impressed, "...Would you like a hose for that? That way you can chug it down frat-boy style—"

With one well-placed, irritated growl and a ferocious set of bared fangs, Alabaster shrieked, rocketing out of there and screaming the entire way he rushed down the hall. Once the little ass sniff was gone, Bowser released an amused, wicked grin before shoving his food away completely, having no true appetite in light of all the recent events.

Beside his brunch lay a translucent bottle of Starman tonic with an attached handwritten note. Bowser picked up the tiny note, scanning it quickly: _Drink one tablespoon for instant eight hour relief, warning tonic goes down strong. Drink slowly._

The king popped the tab, ignoring the prescription and sucked down half the bottle in one loud squelch. Bowser winced; the Starman tonic was strong like liquor, burning all the way down, and even making his eyes water. He impatiently swiped an arm across his eyes and blinked, realizing a new servant was bowed before him.

"Yeah?" he barely grunted the syllable.

"King Bowser, Her Eminence would like to see you."

A burst of excitement and even fear colored his voice, "...As in Princess _Daisy_?"

The servant shook her head negative, "Not quite. It is Queen Meringue who would like to see you, Sir."

* * *

><p>I stood outside the only set of pearl-white marble double doors in our palace. Only the beloved empress was doted upon with elegant furnishings and a hallway filled with dewy, freshly picked violets. I inhaled the heady aroma of sweet petals before gently knocking on Grammy's chamber doors, "Grammy, may I come in?"<p>

I halted, slightly surprised to hear a second voice on the other side of the door. I could hear soft laughter and a deep voice...Was that _Bowser_? Just as I leaned my ear against the furnished oak door, it rolled open and I toppled over.

That was until my cheek squished against a cool, smooth surface. It was Bowser's plastron. A deep, rumbling chuckle reverberated through the golden plastron as I peered up _idiotically,_ meeting the laughing red eyes of the Darklandian king.

_Argh, crappity crap! Why do I always look so stupid in front of him!?_

"Falling head over heels after a sinfully handsome king, huh?" Bowser's smile grew sharper and more wicked at my flourishing embarrassment.

_Damn! Damn! Damn!_

"Apparently my coordination buckles around you," I sighed.

"_Knees_ buckling, you mean?" Bowser purred silkily.

I stepped away from him with as much dignity as I could muster—which wasn't much by the way—as Bowser peered at me, an amused, lopsided grin curled on his face, "So _princess_. Now that you've tried to throw yourself at me, why not come in, instead of eavesdropping? We've been expecting you. And I can finally get you alone."

"Does your ego ever shrink!?" I rolled my eyes, "I guess I should have just come—"

My breath hitched, eyes widening as I studied him closer. Bowser mistook my astonishment for something else as he grinned wildly. He even leaned forward, speaking in a velvety purr, "What is it _Purga_? Am I making you _nervous_, Cutie pie?"

"Your..." I grimaced.

For a long moment I stared, drinking in every wound, all the angry red wounds etched into his scales and the ugly discolored bruises splattered over his limbs and even his face.

His flirtatious grin disintegrated as he quickly realized I was ardently examining his wounds. Something vulnerable flashed across his face and before I could reply, Bowser glared, growling and turning away hastily.

I froze, blinking unsurely at the sharp spines of his shell. Did I just do something to upset him? I scrambled mentally, trying to think of anything consoling to say, but everything that came to mind ended up sounding insensitive in my mental filter.

"Bowser...You don't have to turn away, you don't look bad at all."

He barely turned his head to glare at me from the corner of his eye, "Your look says otherwise."

"It's not that bad..."

"Kooples is here," I couldn't decide if Bowser blatantly cut me off or if he was just stating a fact. And almost as if to support his statement, I heard a happy squeak from Kooples.

"Ah, is that the sound my granddaughter?" Grammy sounded excited, "_Viente Pichi_! Come in!"

Bowser stepped aside to allow entry. Grammy lay comfortably within her four poster bed, propped up with silky pillows. No matter how many times I stepped into her room, I was always awed by the beauty of her bedspread; it was a shimmering sea of luxurious amethyst silk.

As Kooples played on the floor, stacking up toy blocks, Grammy's expression was bored, mauve lips pulled in a pout. It was odd to see Grammy, who was always lightly made up with lipstick or blush plain-faced for a change. If anything, she looked better without any embellishment; younger, brighter-eyed and fresh-faced.

The second Grammy saw the two of us enter together, her eyes brightened like stars. She sat up, happily waving us in, "Come in! Come on in _Pichi_! The maids brought extra tea and cookies! Come sit next to your _Granna_."

She patted a spot beside her leg excitedly as Kooples chirruped a happy greeting. I rubbed the top of his head affectionately before carefully slipping into the cool amethyst silk.

I gently reached for Grammy's hand; her thin fingers were warm and her grip strong; a great contrast from last night when she had felt so cold and brittle. But today she appeared much better; cheeks flushed with natural color and health.

"Grammy..." I whispered thickly, "You're okay...You look _so_ much better..."

"Sorry I worried you, baby," she whispered, "I know it's been so rough with everything going on...But I'm okay, see? I'm good as new."

She smiled brightly and before I could think, I reacted, clutching her into a fierce hug. Grammy held me, rubbing my back soothingly and promising that she was okay.

I pulled away, rubbing stubborn stray tears of relief and joy from my eyes. Grammy peered over at Bowser, who had hung back to give us a personal moment.

He lingered in the corner of the room, arms crossed and expression closed. Grammy waved him over exuberantly and for a split second I saw a glimmer of joy flicker across his face.

Bowser stomped over until he was nearly on top of my position. Kooples chirruped a greeting to the king before returning to his toy blocks.

"_Granna_, how do you feel?" I whispered, gently kneading my thumb across her wrist.

"I'm much better _Pichi_, you look so nervous," she laughed, pulling me closer, "Why the long face? A pretty girl like you shouldn't look so troubled!"

"Grammy, I was worried about you. You seemed so weak and your skin felt like ice...I thought..." I choked up on my last words, willing myself not to burst into an overemotional sob, "Oh Stars, I am _not _a crybaby!"

But Grammy shushed me, pulling my head against her chest and wrapping her arms around my shoulders, "Oh now _Pichi_," she cooed softly, "I'm not going anywhere. I just got really into smashing that _seloh's_ statue."

Bowser and I peered up at her in one synchronized, liquid move. Disbelief glowed on the Koopa king's face, "_What?"_

I pulled away, peering up at her amused expression, "You smashed King Pisces' statue!? Grammy, no one knows that! Not Sarasaland, or the Aqualandians! Not even Dad!"

"..._You_ smashed someone's statue Grammy!?" Bowser boomed with laughter, guffawing as hard as he could before his injuries began to hurt, "Just when I thought I had you figured out, you do something even more amazing. Ah Stars, I better stop before I pop a lung..."

My heart dropped as I came to a realization; she broke the statue because of what King Pisces did to her...And once the Aqualands learns that she was responsible...that's going to be one more strike they're going to hold against us.

Which was completely unfair considering they've started all of this strife. Taurus deserved the knuckle sandwich I gave him and King Pisces certainly deserved a desecrated statue. I hope Grammy smashed the hell out of his statue.

"Grammy..." I spoke softly, eyes hard, "I know why you broke King Pisces' statue. Taurus...told me the entire story..."

Grammy's expression grew tense before she finally emitted a sigh, one deep enough to make her shoulders sag. She carefully rested a contemplative fist under her chin, eyes suddenly dim. The sudden shift in mood made Bowser fall silent as Grammy spoke, "Well, I suppose I ought to come clean, don't you think?"

"Grammy," Bowser raised his hands in a placating gesture, "you don't have to tell us anything you don't want to."

"No, no, I think it's time now," she spoke softly, peering at the ceiling, "Though I honestly hoped _Pichi _you would never find out about this element of my past. I've wanted none of my kin to know, honestly."

Bowser's brows met together in a firm knot, "...You want me to go? I can take Kooples too. 'Cause this probably isn't...this sounds personal..."

"You might as well stay, young shell. It's not going to be much of a secret for much longer, I'm afraid," Grammy peered at me, her expression blank, "What did that _seloh_ tell you, _Pichi_?"

I tried to swallow the lump in my throat but it only made my voice thick and groggy, "That you had...slept with his grandfather against your will. Since Sarasaland had been in a serious drought...it was really bad, and now that I think about it, even the councilors remember it."

Grammy nodded, eyes glazed over with recollection, "Yes...Everything prince _seloh _said was true. I had very little option; we had suffered a terrible famine and as Sarasaland's empress, I had to do as I must to save my people. I did the only thing I could. My Stars, it was completely deplorable."

"Grammy," I whispered, "Why didn't you tell me? Or anyone about this?"

Bowser's expression grew severe, jowls smoking as he clenched his rattling fists, "Flower, cover Kooples' ears."

I wasn't sure what he was thinking, but I quickly reached down, picked up the Koopaling and covered his ears. Kooples started to laugh; he must have thought we were playing a game.

"Son of a bitch," Bowser whispered fiercely, eyes thin as a blade, "So it's really true..."

"I'm afraid so," Grammy murmured, eyes distant, "It was a shame, a burden I bore for my kingdom, and ever since, the Grand council has held me in high esteem. I never had to fight with them to pass legislation and bills that normally they wouldn't care for."

As Bowser massaged his temples, eyes closed and brows furrowed with agitation, I chewed everything over. The council knew of this. They _knew_ what had happened to Grammy and yet, they had wanted me to marry prince Taurus!? Where was the sense in all of _this_!?

"Does Dad know about this?" I asked, "About what happened with you...?"

Grammy's closed expression answered my query better than any words could have, "Only the council. Sakuro would have never set you up with the Aqualandian _seloh_ if he knew..."

I smiled; I knew it, Father would never have even considered Taurus if he knew the history with the Aqualands. Bowser laughed bitterly, slapping a palm to his temple in sheer disbelief.

When he spoke, there was no real humor, "You've got to be kidding me. And yet here your Desert councilmen are trying so desperately to set your princess up with this bastard's grandson! This sh—uh stuff _kills _me."

Grammy peered down at her hands, eyes cloudy, "I didn't want the same thing to happen to you _Pichi_. I've always wished for you to follow your heart. Maybe I couldn't have the freedom I wanted when I was your age, but I'm determined to see you have it. You will marry the man you wish to, and you won't have to be a sacrifice as I was."

"Grammy..." I muttered softly.

Grammy shook her head, eyes closed as if envisioning something, "Learn from your grandmother, Dear. If there's one thing I'd take back, an event I could make vanish in my life, it would be that night with King Pisces. There are certain things, elements of yourself that are not worth selling, even to save your kingdom. Don't make my same mistake and marry for your kingdom, do it for _you_. That's a level of heartbreak I couldn't deal with."

I remained quiet and melancholic, pensively chewing over Grammy's counsel. Now that I knew what I did, everything made so much sense; especially her unexplained hostility toward Taurus...I wonder why Grammy didn't tell me earlier, did she think I would judge her?

Did she think knowledge of her past would make me recoil and loathe her? If anything this only proved how lionhearted and brave Grammy was. I was startled when Bowser's deep baritone flooded the room, "Queen Meringue, do you remember the promise you had me make? The one on the plane?"

Grammy remained silent, keenly studying his profile before speaking, "Yes...Of course I do son."

"Then I want to continue keeping that promise," he spoke so gravelly I barely understood. He turned to face me, "I promised your grandmother that I'd protect you and..."

"King Bowser..." Grammy whispered with no small trill of awe.

I didn't understand everything that was going on, but I understood the gravity of his words; he seemed serious, "What do you mean, Bowser?"

Bowser clenched his fists tight enough to pop his knuckles, "Just...Just let me finish my thoughts, okay? Grammy, I'm absolutely pi—_livid_—you had to go through that. And I can't even imagine what it's like to be forced to...ugh, I'm getting nauseous just thinking about it...but maybe I understand 'cause I too was forced to marry some spoiled, selfish Koopette."

I opened my mouth to speak, but Grammy shushed me, placing her hand upon mine. She shot a smile my way, one that warmed her eyes like a summer sky and made them crease.

Bowser's voice crept into a whisper, "Flower...I-I want to protect you i-if you'll let me. You know in the same kind of way that red plumber protects Peach? Yeah. Only I'd be _twice_ the man as he is. So what do you...think?"

Grammy's grin was so large and Bowser's expression was so sincere, I was speechless. Besides Father's obligatory paternal protection, never had anyone pledge this, their devotion or the security he was promising.

I knew I must have been flame red as Bowser's intense, serious mien dissolved. His mischievous, lopsided smirk I was growing to appreciate resurfaced.

I smiled, moving errant strands of hair from my eyes, "Alright then Bowser, I accept. And thank you. I don't say this often, but choosing you for my best friend was one of the best decisions I've ever made."

Bowser's expression grew soft, and I grabbed his hand, "Thank you Bowser. This means a lot to me."

"You're very welcome, milady" and with that, Bowser lifted my hand and with nothing but a sly grin, pressed a kiss against my knuckles. I flushed a deep red as Grammy laughed happily, startling Kooples.

"Ooh! _Que un biento golgo, saa_?" Grammy asked teasingly, partially laughing. I was grateful she was diplomatic enough to have used Sarasalandian for what she said.

"_Saa_," I agreed, light-headed and trying to sort out the unusual buttery, honey-sweet sensation warming my chest.

"Are you two lovely ladies talking about a certain hunky king?" Bowser grinned, "I do recognize the word for 'Koopa' after all."

Grammy frowned at me playfully, "Oh no _Pichi_, he's on to us."

I laughed, before sending Bowser a sharp smile, "So, what were you and Grammy talking about before I came in here?"

"About—" Bowser halted when Grammy lightly slapped her palm against his plastron to keep him quiet, "—nothing obviously Flower. Quit bugging."

I laughed, "As my big bad protector, I thought you'd be on my side here!"

Bowser smiled almost unnoticeably, causing the laceration on his lip to stretch. His tail wagged, thumping against the floor.

He rubbed the back of his head and I was surprised when he turned to face me bashfully, "Protector huh? Kinda like the ring to that."

Grammy shot a sly grin at Bowser, "Me too."

I smiled at him, "Thanks Bowser. I don't want to make light of what you're doing. So thanks."

I took his hand within mine, carefully wrapping my hand around a few of his sharp claws. I peered up at him, smiling the warmest I have in a long while.

Bowser seemed stunned, blinking back at me wordlessly. I realized his face was slowly beginning to turn red. He instantly turned his face away, "Uh...it's n-no p-problem Flower."

Grammy's sudden bought of giggles made me shoot an inquisitive glance her way. Whatever she was laughing about only made Bowser's face glow a darker shade of red.

Grammy sent one last amused grin Bowser's way before decidedly clearing her throat, "Ah yes. So moving on...?"

Something suddenly came to mind, "Oh! I'm going to spend the rest of the afternoon with my suitors," I turned to smile up at the king, "Today's their last day here and we're going to have one last mini hurrah. And I know you're not stro—uh, you need to rest for the entire day. Doctor's orders right?"

Bowser snorted as I continued, "But...do you think by sunset you'd be up to...go on a stroll around the palace?"

It was obvious how Bowser suddenly straightened up and how his eyes lit up, "I'd be 'up' to do anything with you. Consider me there."

"The maids stopped by and said there's been a lot of lurking paparazzi showing up all over the palace, in the rose gardens, swarming the front gate. _Yi puedestir_, can you believe them!?" Grammy murmured, "You're going to have to choose an unknown location."

I tried to think of a remote location that the snooping paparazzi wouldn't have any interest in. We had horse stables but many of our thoroughbreds were of a powerful, champion lineage that could garner attention, the white sand gardens—yeah _that's _out, our most high profile guests; kings, sultans, princes, are entertained there—my mother's personal rose garden could be a good choice since it remained anonymous and lastly there was the relatively unknown pasture.

The pasture it was.

"I know where we can go," I laughed, "But you're going to think it's strange."

"Now I'm curious," Bowser smirked, "Where are we going for our friendly, isolated stroll?"

I smiled, "Our very own pasture. We have a large flock of Towtows there."

"Towtows? Like the sheep-ram hybrids?" Bowser blinked, "What in the world is a palace doing holding those things for?"

"Ever since the palace was built in the mid sixteenth century, Towtows have always grazed in the pastures. It eventually continued to be a timeless tradition to keep a flock," I laughed, "And people swear they have therapeutic merit; many of the servants tend to them on their breaks, even the highly esteemed Grand Elder councilmen come and feed them after long meetings. Towtow wool can be made into one of the softest fabrics and the milk is a delicacy used in many of our desserts. We'll go there and no one will be none the wiser. Now come on, let's get you back to bed."

He grinned wickedly, "Join me—?"

"_Alone_." I tried not to grin as I helped Bowser limp down the hall. Kooples toddled beside him, holding onto his leg for balance.

"Fine," Bowser pretended to throw his head back haughtily, "Kooples and I are just awesome by ourselves, aren't we Kooples?"

A happy, exuberant squeak came from the tottering Koopaling.

"That's right Koopaling, we're gonna kick back and have us a manly nap. No girls allowed. _Especially_ the cute ones with red hair."

I laughed, "Well while you two are doing some _hardcore _malebonding, I've got to entertain the suitors."

"By doing what?" Bowser tried to keep a straight face but no matter how macho he pretended to be, I knew he was in pain.

"After I drop you off, we're going to class!"

"Well can't say I'm jealous. Have fun in _class_," Bowser snorted, "Education _sucked _big dangly balls when I was in school and I bet it still does now."

"I'm just glad for a change I'm not being tutored alone," I laughed, "I can totally goof off now. Maybe even catch a nap here and there."

"And with Dogboy there," Bowser half laughed, "you're guaranteed not to have the lowest score!"

"Here's not going to be _that_ bad..."

* * *

><p>Wolfe frowned, "...Was I supposed to have understood <em>any<em> of this?"

I laughed softly.

The headmistress continued the lecture in a dab droll that only encouraged her students to sneak in a snooze, "It was in the year 1652 when Nimbusland had been discovered and founded by the first King, Fluffington Cloudimus. As one of the few voyagers brave enough to walk on the clouds and see he could stand on the clouds—"

I was in the process of typing in a few more notes when Wolfe leaned in towards Zero and loudly whispered, "Did she say 1672? Or 1789?"

Zero peered at him and barely smirked, "_Neither_."

"Okay," Wolfe bobbed his head, scribbling in something completely wrong, "1350 it is!"

"Stars almighty," Zero laughed quietly, "how did you even come up with that!? Nimbusland wasn't even founded yet."

As a true glimpse into the life and times of Princess Sarasaland, my day always began with tutoring in foreign relations, and foreign histories. My tutoring sessions were always held in the lecture hall where Father usually gave his speeches to the public.

We were given an hour lecture on foreign affairs—combining the customs, history and cultures of the Dry Dry desert people, Nimbusland, Yo'ster Isle and the Bean Bean Kingdom—then we were to be given a written exam to test a summation of our previous and learned knowledge.

Lady Angora sat in the corner of the room, sitting with her spine perfectly straight and her face blank. Luigi, Silver and Ryu appeared to be diligent students, carefully typing their notes into their laptops as Wolfe claimed to be 'old school' preferring to shorthand his notes into a notebook. It seemed meticulous, but really Wolfe only wanted a notebook so he could doodle silly pictures during the lecture. And that's exactly what he did.

Zero remained bored, constantly checking his watch for when the lecture would end. Finally the headmistress finished her lecture with a cheery snap that even made Lady Angora jump, "And now that we've finished this rousing lecture! It is time for the written exam! I will now hand out the pencils and tests, please try to finish as promptly as possible."

As I circled and bubbled in my answers, I peered across the room at my suitors; Wolfe looked the most conflicted, scratching his head with his pencil eraser as Silver nervously chewed on the edge of his writing utensil. Both Ryu and Zero seemed composed, jotting in their answers with no stress.

The headmistress paced before the blackboard, impatiently tapping her pointer against her hand in a steady intonation. She peered at the clock and once the hand struck twelve thirty precisely, she spoke, peering at us all from beneath her spectacles, "Please submit your answers."

She collected all our papers, and while humming a merrily upbeat tune, dipped her quill into red ink, slashing across the papers with a malevolent gusto; why did educators always seem to enjoy tearing the hell out of their students' papers!? We did our best not to flinch with each cutting, violent slash she made.

With one last slash across an exam, she stood up, smiling happily, "I have finally tallied up the results of today's test," she spoke crisply, fixing her spectacles, "And now I shall announce the results. _Ahem_. Lord Wolfesbane. You are accredited a 100."

Wolfe burst with victorious laughter, pumping a fist happily into the air as Puppo howled happily, "HELL YEAH! Woo! Killed it! And here I thought it was kind of tou—"

"...out of _500_," The headmistress peered at him with a sly smirk.

Zero and Luigi laughed as Ryu grinned at Wolfe's slack-jawed, wide-eyed stupor. I chuckled; well, I don't think even I did that badly.

"...Damn it," Wolfe whimpered, pride—and his confidence—shattered.

"Lord Salini," the headmistress appeared pleased, "You have received a perfect 500. Congratulations! However, seeing as you drabble in foreign affairs, it is not surprising you have a stellar mastery of the material."

Zero nodded, none too excited in receiving a perfect score because it had been expected; Zero Salini may have been lacking in polite etiquette but there was no questioning his knowledge of foreign affairs.

He had toiled stubbornly during his undergraduate, making sure he mastered the perplexing intricacies of legislation, learned multiple languages and customs to improve foreign diplomacy, and took hours of high social decorum until it was an art.

The headmistress moved on to the next paper, "Lord Ryu, was accredited a decent score of 400. And oh my! Prince Silver is rewarded an astounding 490! I suppose being a prince and being exposed to worldly knowledge would benefit you!"

"Not bad Silv!" Wolfe reached over and amicably clapped Silver's back with a resounding thud. Silver yelped, nearly toppling out of his seat from the strength of Wolfe's friendly gesture, "All brains and no brawn eh?"

Silver arched a brow at the good-natured slight as Ryu chuckled softly, "Knowing Wolfe's good temperament, I'm sure he meant that in a genial way, Silver."

"Master Luigi, you performed quite well!" The headmistress smiled warmly, "You received a score of 430! Is this your first time learning of foreign affairs?"

"Yeah, it-a was fun," he smiled.

"Perhaps plumbing isn't your only calling in life. And last but not least, Princess Daisy received a 380," she gave me a slightly stern look, "I _will _expect an improved score, your mark barely makes the seventieth percentile. You will study harder. Class dismissed."

Lady Angora stayed behind, speaking with the headmistress as we ambled down the hall. Next in my schedule was physical education and today was going to be tennis. The suitors trailed behind as I lead the way to our personal gym.

Wolfe snorted as Puppo hopped onto his shoulder, "Well _that _was boring. I was trying to sleep the whole time but she kept yammering on about something called 'foreign policy'."

"You were _supposed_ to be learning," Ryu spoke with a touch of humor, "How are you supposed to make a great Canine leader one day if you can't learn history Wolfe?"

"How is learning about the past important now?" Wolfe frowned, scratching Puppo behind his ears.

"Through looking at others' pasts, you can learn from their previous mistakes," Ryu hummed, "Or at least try to."

"But does history have to be so _boring_?" Wolfe whined, "It's just about a bunch of dead people. Who are...dead."

As I laughed, Zero shook his head with exasperation clearly written on his face. Silver laughed, "Well, t-things would be less lively without you Wolfe!"

"Hell yeah!" Wolfe laughed, slapping one arm around Silver and the other around me. He pulled us in until our faces were nearly touching, "Soooo, what's next on the itinerary D? More useless history?"

I smirked, "Physical education actually."

"_'Physical education_? What's _that_?" Wolfe boomed with laughter, "Ya mean like sex ed?! Birds and the bees business? Didn't you learn that a while ago?"

Zero turned to Ryu, "I don't understand how he got _that_ from physical education."

"I don't understand how he doesn't view history as important," Ryu grinned.

I laughed, "No Wolfe! Physical education as in sports you big dork!"

"_Ahem."_

Both Wolfe and I jumped as Lady Angora stood behind us; she was so quiet! She may very well have materialized from the shadows. She glared at Wolfe, eyes cut so thin they didn't look open, "A _word,_ with her ladyship, if you will."

Something tells me she wasn't all too thrilled to be hearing Wolfe and I joking around about sex ed—or possibly sex—in general. In the conservative, traditional land of Sarasaland, society would be appalled to even hear their princess utter the word sex. Hell, I wasn't even supposed to show my knees in public.

Wolfe laughed, before casting a sly look behind himself, "Hey Zero, she's calling you."

Luigi and Silver laughed as Zero smirked, "I'm glad you're good-natured Wolfe, because there's nothing worse than an ill-tempered idiot."

If Angora heard Zero's insult, she deftly ignored it, "This is our servant Alabaster," she motioned towards the young servant who bowed, "he will lead you gentlemen to the locker rooms to be suited up. Today's sport is tennis I believe."

"Come and step this way gentlemen," Alabaster bowed, stepping aside as he motioned them towards a nearby door, "We will get you suited up in no time flat."

The second they all walked past, Alabaster snorted and muttered under his breath, "_Really?_ _These_ are the losers trying to marry our princess...Heh, Sarasaland really has fallen on some hard times..."

Wolfe peered back at him, "Didya say something lil' dude?"

"I said have fun!" Alabaster cheered falsely, waving as Wolfe waved back.

The moment the suitors disappeared, Alabaster rolled his eyes and then uttered something his under his breath, "_Loserfaces..."_

* * *

><p>I had barely stepped into the locker room when Lady Angora rounded upon me. She didn't express her disapproval orally but it was all but blazing in her eyes, "Turn around, please."<p>

"Of course," I rolled my eyes, before giving her my back.

She hastily shooed away the approaching maids who had been lingering nearby, opting to do the chore herself. Lady Angora immediately began to unlace my dress, pulling and plucking with temperamental yanks. The room was silent for an uncomfortable stretch and I'm sure Lady Angora was gathering the words to lecture me.

"_Princess Sarasaland_," Lady Angora didn't sound anywhere near happy, in fact it even sounded as if she was speaking through her teeth, "What was that _crude_ talk I heard!? In what_ universe _do you live in to think it is anywhere near acceptable for the crown princess to speak so filthily!? Have any of those young men said anything else so unspeakably vulgar to you!?"

I peered at her skeptically, half way laughing, "No, Lady Angora, besides Wolf—_Wolfesbane_ wasn't saying anything bad...he was asking if our next class was sex ed—"

"Sex!?" she squealed, unusually flustered. She took a deep, calming breath before her voice returned to its normal, refined lilt, "Princess Sarasaland. Ladies do _not _speak of...of _intercourse,_ let alone intercourse with _men_ in general. If your father knew of this atrocity...! However as he is severely burden with meetings and the like, I will overlook this obscene subject just this once. There, your dress has been undone. Disrobe please."

I pulled the dress overhead as Lady Angora riffled through my sports outfits, maroon lips pursed in a displeased pout as her eyes darted over the clothing like a metronome, "Yes. This will do just fine."

She placed a white top and a matching short, feminine skirt in my hands. I arched a brow, peering at the terribly feminine ensemble, hoping this was some kind of a bad prank but Angora's unmoved stare said otherwise, "Does something _displease_ her ladyship?"

"Uh...what is this?" I held the skirt away from me as if it could suddenly combust into flames at a moment's notice. _What a froo-froo, sissy outfit. I might as well wear a sign saying 'Yay! I suck!' with this!_

"Obviously it's a skirt and top."

No duh. "I'm going to get shorts right? Because one, this is a short skirt, two, any type of wind will blow it up and three, I'm not trying to give out any free shows."

"Today isn't supposed to be windy," Angora huffed, "Here, then wear these bloomers. They will match your skirt."

I ignored the outfit for a second and turned to look back at her. Lady Angora was busy searching through the locker's closet, "Lady Angora...?"

"Yes?"

"What..." I looked down at the outfit in hand "do you think about our treaty with the Aqualands?"

She gauged my expression, studying my body language in reflective silence. For a fraction of a second, her expression hardened, "I am ashamed."

"For what—?"

"That we ever considered trying to marry you to irredeemable filth," when I peered at her, her wintry expression lightened fractionally. Angora even smiled for half a second, "Now enough of that. The Grand Council and the emperor shall handle everything. _Your _duties involve entertaining the suitors as mine require looking after your well-being. And on that note, I'd like you to go out there and beat those whelps in tennis."

I smiled, "Okay, thanks Lady Angora. For, you know...uh...stuff."

"Yes," again her red lips quirked into a smirk, "For _'stuff_.'"

I finished lacing up my athletic shoes, gave her one last meaningful smile before heading towards the tennis courts but Lady Angora intercepted me immediately. Her expression was oddly blank, "Princess Sarasaland."

"...Uh yes?"

Face still emotionless, Lady Angora wordlessly spun me around and before I could protest, she pulled my skirt out of the back of my bloomers. In my haste to get dressed, I had managed to embarrassingly tuck my skirt into my underwear like a _loser crackpot_.

As Angora continued to stare at me blankly, my face seared three different shades of red as I realized I could have left the locker room like _that_.

She sighed deeply, "...What _am_ I going to do with you...?"

"Uh...Not let me dress myself anymore?" Now that I thought about it, her question was probably rhetorical.

She came very close to smiling, "Exactly. Now go."

When I left the locker room, I could swear I heard the stolid, staid Angora LeCatte laughing her ass off.

* * *

><p>"Don't be afraid to get in there!" Plum cheered, pigtails bobbing with the nod of her head, "Topslice that ball!"<p>

Luigi smashed the ball across court and I reeled the tennis racket back, grinning wickedly as I savored the half second the ball lingered in the air. With a furious roar, I pounded all my frustration into the ball.

Luigi made a diving save, but it wasn't soon enough as I received another point. As I wiped sweat from my forehead I was rewarded with soft applause as the suitors cheered.

Lady Angora frowned dismally, eying my dirt-caked skin and wild hair with apparent disdain. Plum popped the whistle into her mouth and blew, "Nice try Luigi! Change partners!"

Per Lady Angora's orders, since I had to change into this frilly, cute ensemble to impress my suitors, the princes were ordered to dress as 'proper gentlemen.'

And apparently to dress as a _gentleman_ during tennis involved wearing lame khaki shorts and boring pastel collared shirts. I had all but fell out laughing the moment I saw Wolfe.

He looked ridiculous; terribly stuffy, a servant had tried to tame his long jet mane with loads of gel and I'm sure the discomfort of his look was due in large part to wearing a shirt that was a couple of sizes too small for his tall, robust form.

Something about the classy, posh look suited Silver and Zero, both who were bred into the trenches of urbane society. Lulu looked cute in his matching green shirt and plaid shorts and Ryu...hmm...it was odd seeing him in non Shinobi clothes, though he made the khakis and shirt seem casual and not awkward like Wolfe.

Though I suppose Mister Clan hottie would look nice in anything; he had the long lean torso and lithe muscles that were a designer's dream. Yeah, I'm sure he could look good in anything.

_Or nothing, said the little devil on my shoulder._

...

I nearly stumbled over my feet; where did that thought come from!? Now was not the time to think of a well-toned, undressed Shinobi heir—_Stars I'm doing it again_—I would focus on tennis. _Tennis._

Luigi, Silver and Zero had already known how to play but Wolfe quickly blazed through the basics. Ryu for the _life _of him couldn't even return a single shot!

Either he hit the ball straight into the net or his lobs flew out of bounds. Wolfe didn't care about the direction he hit the ball—as long as it landed on the opponent's court—his goal was just to pound the hell out of the ball and hope you can't return his rocket-fueled shots.

Plum tweeted the whistle again and this time Silver and I played an easy, uncompetitive round—well okay I did, after I scored enough points to be winning—simply enjoying the other's ability to return the ball to the correct court.

There was no true challenge against the Shinobi leader; Ryu spent half of the session laughing at his own mistakes as he hit ball after ball into his own net.

With the next switch Wolfe popped into the opposing court, grinning wildly as he motioned me to 'bring it.' The flames of our competitive nature blazed riotously as we lunged, scraped knees and bruised knuckles, refusing to give up points to the other. Wolfe's golden eyes glowed wildly, teeth bared in a wicked smile as he slammed another powerful shot across court.

I made a mental catalogue of the powerful tennis roster at the Mario Tennis tourneys; Wario, DK, Bowser, Petey Piranha by ascending order of strength. Hands down Wolfe would have been the fastest of them all, though I'm positive he wasn't as strong as DK.

We had one last aggressive rally before a sharp whistle pierced the air and Plum's sleek pigtails bounced as she appeared, "Alright! That's it for the day! Wow, what a great round of tennis you two! Excellent overhand by the way, Princess. Glad to see you've mastered it! You're going to be a monster in the next Mario Tennis Tournament!"

"Thanks Plum!" I beamed.

"Thank you Ms. Plum for accommodating our new set of guests. Sarasaland appreciates your excellence, but I'm afraid the time as slipped away. It's become one thirty and we must see to our constricting itinerary," Lady Angora rose to her feet with a soundless grace, her pearl dress sweeping around her ankles, "Gentlemen, Princess Sarasaland, please adjourn to your showers and we shall commerce in thirty at the great golden hall."

I smiled, curtsying demurely to both Lady Angora and Plum before turning to the lady's locker rooms. I realized someone was trailing me and burst into laughter when I saw it was Wolfe. He grinned largely, sharp incisors displayed in a mischievous beam, "Hey, hey there D!"

"Hi Wolfe!"

"Ready for some extreme shower power?" He laughed warmly, "You know, you gave me a workout in that court. For a second I thought you were trying to kick my butt."

"I _did_ kick your butt," I smirked.

"You _tried_," he grinned right back.

"Just so you know, the guy's locker room is the _other_ way," I hiked my thumb over my shoulder and grinned.

"_AAAAnd_?" he smirked wickedly, "I'm going where the cute girl goes and those other unhandsome saps just have to deal with it."

"Father will have you strung up by a tree if he sees you," I laughed, leaning in to whisper to him. No, I was dead serious, Father _would _have that arranged.

Wolfe, playing along, bent in to 'whisper' back, "Heh, I'm so sneaky and smooth no one will know I'm here. Watch!"

"Wolfe?" I heard Ryu's voice from across the courtyard and guffawed, "You are a_ little_ lost?"

I laughed harder; Wolfe couldn't be incognito if his life depended on it. The suitors had clearly noticed his disappearance and were all pointedly peering in our direction. Ryu looked amused, a single brow arched as Silver and Luigi beamed. Zero shook his head.

Before turning away, I noticed something, oh shall we say, _interesting_. Plum, who usually left right after tennis practice was still lingering around. While Luigi was peering in our direction and chatting with Silver, Plum was discreetly studying _him_.

Her mahogany eyes were carefully tracing his form, as a subtle smile played on her pink lips and the moment Luigi turned her way, she quickly went back to packing her things. But the moment Lulu looked away, Plum smiled, peering at him one last time through her eyelashes.

I quirked an eyebrow. _Oh what is this here?_ I know that look. Something tells me Plum has a thing for somebody...And that somebody wears lots of green...

Mrs. Brooms, an older maid who had worked in the palace since Grammy's reign, stood outside of the ladies' locker room.

She was dutifully hanging laundry and waved kindly as I walked past. She paused the moment she scoped out Wolfe trying to accompany me into the girl's locker room.

Mrs. Brooms was well into her sixties and was still very set in the older traditional ways; women were docile, demure ladies and men were valiant gentlemen.

And even with Wolfe's obvious posturing and joking, for someone like Mrs. Brooms, a suitor should not try and follow the_ unwed_ princess into a locker room. Mrs. Brooms gasped with lurid outrage before stomping over, face flushed red with sheer indignation.

_Heh. Oh boy. This oughta be good._

Wolfe blinked as the short, rotund Mrs. Brooms was suddenly in his face—or trying to be since she was so tiny—spewing an angry torrent of reprimands in rapid Sarasalandian, wagging her finger in his face before gripping the back of his shirt and dragging him the opposite direction.

Wolfe half-laughed, "_Oh come on_, lady! There's no need to be upset! I wasn't _really_ going in there!"

And in fluent Sarasalandian Mrs. Brooms was heatedly spouting, "_Why I'd never! What is it with you kids today!? Always trying to get cheap thrills! The shame of your young...lusty generation! In my day a boy needed a chaperon before he could even SPEAK to a young lady! Oh the shame of it all!"_

As Mrs. Brooms dragged a laughing, good-natured Wolfe away, Silver turned to face the other suitors, "W-Well, so far hasn't been too hard, huh?"

"Yeah, whatever-a they have us do next-a can't be that bad," Luigi agreed amicably.

"It can't be worse than this," Zero grimaced, motioning to his matching orange plaid shorts and shirt, "This can make anyone look like a jackass. I look like a giant orange traffic cone."

Ryu laughed softly, "As long as we have or pride intact by day's end, we can't complain right?"

"And..."

With a flick of delicate, long aristocratic fingers and the lifting of a thin baton, Madame Baila gracefully raised her wand, "Necks up! Spines straight! Stomachs tucked and legs on the bar! Let me see some beautiful swan necks and pointed ballerina toes! Ballerinos for my gentlemen!"

"'Pride intact' my _ass_," Wolfe spewed with a fair amount of venom.

This time I had to bite my lip to hold back my mounting laughter. Where were the cameras when needed?! In our castle's personal studio where Father practiced judo, and some of the castle staff took ridiculous dance lessons—apparently there's a dance called the bunny hop and yes, it's as dumb as it sounds—I practiced dance.

Yes, it was hard to believe with my lack of coordination but I practiced dance. Dance was supposed to imbue a young lady with grace and poise, limbs slender and sure.

Dance _only_ made everyone realize how graceless I was.

Lady Angora believed a princess should move as fluid as water and elegantly as if her limbs were made of silk; and there wasn't any force on our planet that she believed to move more liquidly than a dancer. And therefore, I practiced dance.

I was outfitted in a snug black leotard with cream-white tights. I had been mortified the moment the suitors stepped in and I was wearing form-hugging clothing but that moment died in a blazing glory of _awesome_ when they stepped into the studio dressed in ridiculous tights.

I had bust up laughing, to the point of tears until Madame Baila entered and began our torture—_dance lesson_. Well, at least today I wasn't alone for her to solely dissect and disembowel. And even better yet, I was not the worst dancer, I'd even wager I was the best.

We were lined up at the studio's bars, standing in front of a long wall of mirrors that reflected our images in endless surfaces. We were stretching our quads, practicing elegant posture and learning how to control our breathing.

Silver seemed to move with a smooth poise, maybe a gift from his training as a graceful Moonstonian prince. Wolfe took in a deep breath, shaking with strain as a bead of sweat rolled down his cheek; the entire time he looked uncomfortable as his legs shook from fatigue.

Ryu fluidly shifted into the perfect, straight-spine posture, arm elevated above his head perfectly. Somehow he managed to make all the motions look lethal and powerful.

Lady Angora was present, with Puppo sitting beside her. And though she was above laughing at everyone's misfortune, she watched the suitors with obvious mirth, eyes twinkling with unhidden amusement.

"I'd like my life to end now _please_." One of the suitors murmured; I'd bet coins it was Wolfe.

"_SILENCE!"_ Madame Bailia snapped waspishly, spinning around so suddenly that everyone jumped, "The only sound I wish to hear are the sound of _breaking hearts_!"

I stifled a giggle but immediately masked my expression when Madame Baila slowly crept past. Her critical, narrowed eyes swept over my frame with laser like intensity.

With her dark hair, deathly pale skin and really long, pointy nose, I used to mistake her for a witch as a kid. Madame Baila eyed me one last time and released a wordless huff; for a change she seemed satisfied before continuing her death march.

"..._Satanic force_," Wolfe muttered under his breath.

Quiet snickers rose into the air and from the corner of my vision Ryu grinned but within a hot second Madame Baila spun around. Everyone fell dead silent as she critically eyed the boys for any flaws in their posture.

She was like a hawk, seeking and circling for any signs of fatigue and weakness. She turned around and walked past me yet again, "Not bad. Not good. Which is good for you. Keep that spine straight, milady."

She walked past Silver, squinted, and then made a few minor adjustments to his posture, "Good! Keep that stomach tucked in. I won't have any vagabonds in my studio."

"Whew, feel the burn!" Wolfe laughed nervously.

Madame Baila slithered towards Ryu and after staring at him with enough intensity to melt steel, she cracked a really creepy, thin smile, "Ah, _finally_ something worth my time. Take a look students, this is what you should look like! See his perfect posture? It is effortless. It is almost lethal. Compared to him you all look like sordid, graceless _wrecks_! You Mister Shinobi are _not_ a graceless wreck."

"_Teacher's pet_," Wolfe muttered under his breath.

Ryu turned to look at Wolfe and grinned before shaking his index finger in a playful, admonishing gesture. Wolfe tried to punch him, but Ryu ducked and that lead to a playful, brotherly exchange of punches and kicks but when Madame Baila suddenly spun back around, they were both back in proper stretching position as if nothing had ever happened.

"_Master Luigi_!" Madame Baila immediately rounded on Luigi, hands on her hips and eyes cut into thin slits, "Terrible posture! Suck in your stomach sire! It is bulging beyond your waistline!"

Luigi looked extremely vulnerable, eyes large and glittering, "B-But I am-a 'sucking it in'!"

She slapped the baton against her palm impatiently, "Try _harder_! My goodness you look like...like a gluttonous potbellied..._plumber _or some sort!"

"But I _am_ a plumber-a!" Luigi wailed.

Muffled laughter sprinkled the air but ceased immediately the moment Madame Baila violently slapped her baton against the wall. She instantly turned her glare upon Wolfe, "And as for _you _Lord Wolfesbane...I've never seen such appalling posture! Straighten _up_!"

"Elegant neck..." Wolfe muttered to himself in reminder, "Elegant swan neck..."

"And you have the neck of a drunken_ piranha_!"

She walked to the front of the studio—using her baton to painfully poke and prod a few of the suitors into better alignment—and with three snaps, we ended the stretching and stood at attention. The madam paced in front of us agitatedly, "For the most part your postures were..."

Wolfe smiled hopefully.

"Awful! Especially _you_!" she turned a sharp glare on Wolfe.

Wolfe pouted.

"But there _might _be hope for you hopeless hens," she paced around us in a slow, predatory circle, "I will give you one last chance to redeem yourselves. Ballerina and ballerinos, we will walk."

"Walk?" Zero arched a brow, "What do you mean, Madame Baila?"

"I mean we will walk!" She preened, throwing her arms out dramatically, "Let your elegance shine! Heads up, necks tall, spines straight! Show those swan necks! Princess, show them the meaning of elegance—Stars help us _all_."

With a snap of her fingers, nearby maids brought three books and placed them at my feet. This was the classic good posture training; walking with proper pose and balancing the books on one's head. Madame Baila fluttered across the room and motioned for me to begin.

I stacked the three heavy books on my head and sighed. _I can walk. Walking is easy_. Walking is something I do every day. Walking isn't that bad—

"Head up! Shoulders high!" Madame Baila barked ruthlessly.

There was nothing graceful about my walk as I wobbled and stumbled along, yet I managed to walk across the studio floor and back without dropping the books on my head.

Madame Baila looked none too impressed with my ungainly, elephantine movements as amusement shone in varying degrees amongst my suitors.

"As elegant as a drunken, one-eyed, piranha!" Madame Baila snapped, and from my peripherals I caught Wolfe laughing; I'm going to take my drunken, one-eyed piranha walk and kick his _ass_, "however the books didn't fall this time," she huffed, clearly unimpressed, "at least it's improvement."

Wolfe snickered, "_That_ was your improved walk?! It looked like a Cataquak on drugs!"

I heard muffled laughter and with inflamed cheeks, I spun around and brandished my fist, "I'll _show_ you a Star drunk Cataquak you—!"

"_A-hem_." Madame Baila arched an eyebrow, "Ladylike pose _please._"

I spoke in a fake, honeyed voice, "Oh Wolfe! Your humor slays _me_!"

_Translation: I will put you in a headlock once she's gone._

Madame Baila nodded before turning to Silver, "Now then, some me your most graceful walk and do not drop a single book or you will do pirouettes!"

"N-Not pirouettes!" Silver muttered under his breath, "W-Well here goes."

Silver stacked the books atop his head and began to amble, slowly making his way down the hall. He looked nervous as hell, with a bead of sweat rolling down the side of his face but he was doing well!

Madame Baila gruffly nodded her approval; hmm, Silver was already better than I was, and I've been doing this for years.

"Lord Salini! Next!"

Zero shrugged, stacking a set of books on his head before strolling down the hall, completely nonchalant. As he practiced walking with elegant posture, Wolfe began to mutter under his breath, "_Drop, drop, drop_!"

Like Silver he didn't drop a single book but Zero never seemed worried at all. Was the trick to mastering book balancing not caring at all?

"Wonderful Lord Salini! The pose of a councilman!"

Zero smirked as she turned to Wolfe, "And now, your turn! Up!"

"Alright!" Wolfe boomed, "Stand back and watch my _gliiiiide_."

Zero leaned towards Luigi, "Twenty coins says he'll drop all three books before his third step."

Luigi laughed, "_Thirty coins_ that he'll-a drop all his books and fall on his-a rear."

Wolfe thrust his shoulders and chest out proudly as he stacked the books on his head. His turn—to put it as nicely as I could—was a catastrophe, each step he took was a loud, thundering stomp and with his third step, the books on his head tilted precariously.

Wolfe yelped as the books began to unbalance, wobbling and he instantly lost all practiced decorum as they fell to the floor in loud thuds. He even dove on his stomach to catch the last book. Zero and Luigi discreetly exchanged coins from their bet as Madame Baila walked over, glaring down at Wolfe.

He peered up and grinned, "I didn't drop all the books!"

"They need to stay on your head!" Madame Bailar hissed, "That was wretched. You walk as if you _kill_ things for a living! What? Do you drag a club around with you as well!?"

Wolfe blinked, before beaming happily, "Hey! How did you even know that!?"

Madame Baila rolled her eyes before looking at Ryu, "You. Up. Walk well and restore my faith."

Ryu's walk was smooth, confident and his steps were so quiet we could barely hear them at all. I guess a good Shinobi would possess the ability to remain quiet.

The lines of his body were in perfect alignment and balancing the books seemed effortless. Madame cooed happily as he walked fluidly, the delicate balance of strength and grace coexisting in his steps. The books on his head didn't even tilt or move.

When Ryu finished his walk, he removed one of the books from his head and placed it on top of mine. When I laughed, Ryu shot a playful grin my way.

Madam Baila floated over, "That is what your walk should look like! Powerful, quiet, yet coordinated and easy. He moved as sinuously as a feline! As liquidly as an assassin."

"Well I guess this makes up for you sucking something awful in tennis," Wolfe laughed.

"Wolfe what are you talking about," Zero interjected, "It takes a _great_ deal of talent to hit the ball into the _net_ as accurately as Ryu does."

Wolfe and Silver laughed heartily and I was surprised when just the slightest flush of color rose to Ryu's face. His fist twitched and before he could rely, Lady Angora stepped towards us, "I hope this lesson wasn't too tiring."

"Lady, it was awful," Wolfe bemoaned.

"Well, this is the final lesson for today," Lady Angora smirked, "I can imagine you're all very eager to relax. I was just informed dinner was completed. Let's pay a visit to the locker rooms one last time and then you shall retired to the dining hall."

"Hey Weegee."

"Yes-a Wolfe?"

"Straighten your shoulders a little, you're slouching."

I halted, turning to look at the suitors. I laughed quietly when Wolfe adjusted Luigi's posture, making him stand perfectly straight; what is this? Are they really using what they learned in ballet today!? I thought Wolfe was being facetious, but his focused, grave expression said otherwise.

_Oh my Stars, they are NOT really doing this._

"Mama mia, I can't have-a that," Luigi sounded exasperated, "I don't want to walk like a drunk piranha."

Silver blinked, "Y-You what? I never noticed h-how bad my posture was until this c-class."

Ryu, perfectly serious—maybe even a little _too _serious—advised, "If you picture having a swan neck, it _really_ helps."

And with that said, the last of my control disappeared as I dissolved into peals of laughter. Then suitors peered at me curiously before shrugging, "...What's her deal?"

* * *

><p>Across thousands of miles of terrain, where the golden sand finally transformed into fertile, green land was where the Aqualands border began. The day was overcast, clouds heavy and pregnant with rain and yet hordes of citizens gathered. Taurus' administration had strategically chosen the popular Undine plaza to give his speech.<p>

It was a place where citizens of middle class could come and shake his hand, see him in person, and be fooled into thinking he was different from all the other richies. That unlike the others, he was a richie that was grounded and down to earth. A real man of the people.

And the second a white limousine arrived, emblazoned with the royal family's seal, the crowd went into a frenzy. Out stepped the handsome prince and the beautiful queen, velvet capes long enough that they brushed the floor.

Prince Aqualand shook hands with the commoners and engaged each man by looking him the eye, picked up a few babies and coquettishly flirted with the younger women nearby.

After receiving a riveting applause, the prince graciously helped his mother up the stairs before trekking his way up to the elevated podium. He gave one last round of waves and flashed several dazzling smiles before beginning.

"My fellow Aqualandians" he spoke in a warm, velvety voice, wearing a more traditional Aqualandian armor encased with shimmering blue scales and a cape patterned like the Aqualandian familial animal, the killer whale, "I believe that honesty is the best policy. And we're proud of the sense of integrity we've established with our citizenry. As an open door monarchy, we will inform you of everything that occurs. Tensions are high, and our ally Sarasaland, feels disenfranchised."

A low buzz of disapproval rose in the air.

"Alas, it is the Aqualandian way to always seek compromise. We have extended our hand out to them, a prospect for peace. Within three day's time, I shall meet with their emperor and demand for a peaceful solution. The eyes of the world are upon us and we will not falter. We've poured too much sweat, blood and tears into this treaty. We've poured too much heart, soul and bone..."

For the duration of the speech, the Aqualandian parliament stood behind their crown prince, sagely nodding their heads in cue of his riveting words and clapping with superficial contentment at his highlights. And to Taurus' right stood the willowy queen Aqualand.

Adorned in an expensive dress that shone like a coterie of pearls, Gemini was a true vision of beauty. Her silver eyes were star stuck, aglow with dreamy clouds of pride; when she saw her son speak, perhaps in his stead she imagined his fair, kind father orating, a man who was just as charismatic and eloquent as her child.

"So sons and daughters of the sea," Taurus' voice percolated over the enraptured crowd with a matured, smooth quality that had been masterfully honed, "we will give the Desert people a chance for peace. We shall open our arms and meet them in the middle and by the time negotiations are over, we will see what their true character is. Shall they allow petulant pride to besmirch our pact, or will they rise up and become the people we know they are capable. We shall see. Thank you for your time and consideration. May the seas of Aqualandia always be calm and the waters blue."

Taurus stepped away from the microphone only to be rewarded with a hearty applause from the large roiling crowd. The first person he sought out was the most important, as he gave the crowd one last wave before encircling his arm within his mother's.

Gemini turned her son's head and planted a generous, affectionate kiss on his cheek, making the crowd coo and cameras glitter in a wild burst of flashes.

Taurus laughed deeply, uttering words to his mother that were lost beneath the excited crowd's clamor. With one last hug, Taurus approached the members of Aqualandian parliament, shaking hands with each man.

Most congratulated him on a masterful speech, and those who were image conscious grappled him in a hug as fondly as they would their grandson. Taurus politely inquired about their families and laughed at a few witty jokes before he shuttled his mother back into her limo.

She peered up at him as he bent down to smile at her, "I'll see you in time for supper?"

"You will, Mother."

"Promise?"

His expression lightened, "I promise."

"Good, you need to eat," she gently reached towards his face to cup his cheek, "You're starting to get so thin. I worry about you."

Taurus' expression cooled, as he gently took his mother's hand within his, "I'm fine. I'll be back in time for dinner, alright? You know my word is as good as pearls."

"Alright. Love you."

Once he was sure his mother was comfortable, he offered one last amiable wave as the queen's limo headed for palace Aqualandian. Once the sleek limo disappeared from sight, Taurus headed to his own chauffeur.

"Good speech there, Kid."

Taurus spun around, true surprise and mirth crossing his staid features, "Uncle!? Holy—! When did _you_ get back!?"

A loud, rousing laughter boomed from the general, "Just got back with the troops. Now pull it in boy."

When his uncle made a grab for him, Taurus smirked, quickly sidestepping the hug. His uncle broke into a rare burst of laughter as he roughly pulled his nephew into a jarring embrace, one hard enough to cause a few of the vertebrae to pop in the prince's spine. He fondly ruffled Taurus' hair until it was a bedraggled blond nest.

Leo was Taurus' father's elder brother who had made a name for himself as a decorated war general. He was a severe man who rarely smiled and showed his devotion towards his family through actions more than flowery words.

After the sudden death of his younger brother, Leo was the rightful heir to the throne, but the pretentious attitudes and spurious words of the political arena rubbed him the wrong way.

Leo was a simple, straight forward man who though blunt, was honest. He ran the Aqualands until his nephew—the second in line for the throne—came of age and all but happily ceded the throne.

It had been a move he had never second guessed; Taurus masterfully understood and breathed the right etiquette and knew which grandiloquent words to employ.

"Is your mom gone?"

Taurus smirked, "Yes, Uncle. Go ahead."

"Good," Leo grunted, "I don't want her _nagging_ me to death. Remember. What Gem doesn't know won't hurt her."

The general fished out a metal case from his overcoat and popped it open, pulling out a cylindrical cigar. Taurus smirked, watching the unorthodox way his Uncle simply chopped the cap with a pocket knife, before whipping out a lighter.

Uncle Leo took a deep inhale, closing his eyes and luxuriating in the flavor before exhaling, "Stars that's _good. _I just got back into the borders and heard some shit about those Desert people. What is that about?"

"It's nothing Uncle," Taurus smiled, "though I was hoping you'd know when the Sarasalandian emperor will arrive?"

His Uncle's silver eyes narrowed broodingly, "Border patrol says he'll be here in three days, early noon."

"Good," Taurus barely smiled, "the sooner he comes the sooner things can finally began."

The Prince was already halfway into his limousine before his uncle stopped him, "Taurus, I caught your speech on the radio. Stars almighty you sound just like...Well I know I don't tell you this nearly enough but I'm really proud, Kid."

Taurus slowed down to peer at Leo, mouth lax from surprise. His uncle had never been the optimistic fool his father was. Uncle Leo was brusque, told you exactly what he thought and was callous from battle.

Taurus knew him as a man of few words who rarely smiled and the fact Leo was doing so now spoke volumes, "I'm glad you're doing all in your power to promote peace. Contradiction is one helluva thing isn't it? A general wanting peace? But real war is about defending your family, protecting your country and not simply destroying someone else's land. Look Kid, your father would have been proud. Gem looked like she wanted to cry up there. We're all proud of you, Son."

Something flickered across Taurus' face, something the retired veteran mistook as sentimentality, when in truth in had been raw fury. Taurus' gray eyes were stony and dark until he forced a smile, "Then in that case, if I remind you of father then I am definitely doing the right thing. Will I see you at dinner? Mother would be thrilled."

His uncle didn't smile, but his expression softened, "You will. Have the servants break out the Goomba scotch. I could use a little of that in my life."

"Will do." With one last firm clasp of his uncle's arm, Taurus nodded before liquidly slipping into the fresh leather upholstery of his limousine.

As the limo drove away, engine purring in a soft, dull hum, the tinted windows shielded Taurus from the outside world as the prince seethed. Prince Aqualandian's mounting fury shot an explosive fire through his veins as his hands clenched the upholstery so tight his knuckles bled white with strain.

_I remind him of Father? No, Uncle doesn't mean that at all. I am nothing like that pathetic fuckwit. He wasn't fit to rule, but I am. And anyone who questions my rule shall pay dearly. An example is to be made of those Desert peasants. Beginning and ending with that pompous emperor and his little ill-mannered Desert bitch._

Taurus ground his jaw irritably; that comparison to his father just about ruined his high and it wouldn't do to sulk at dinner. He needed something to work his frustrations out on. An idea came to mind, an idea that had ample hips and long legs to die for. Taurus pressed a single button on his cell phone and waited. It was answered in one click.

"_Come stai_, _Bella,"_ his purr took on a low, masculine growl, "Guess who's back in town? _Sì_. Oh? You like it when I speak Aqualandian? _Sei la ragazza più carina che nonsco_. How about you meet me in my quarters in twenty? Perfect. I'll even get that champagne you like. The one that makes you do the craziest things. Haha stunning. See you soon, _ciao bella_. "

With a careless flick, Taurus hung up, just the faintest smirk playing upon his lips. He peered at the cloudy sky anticipating the moment he'd get to meet with Emperor Sakuro. And he wouldn't just knock him down a few pegs, he'd make that prick emperor and his bratty daughter regret ever crossing him.

* * *

><p>"I can't wait to take a hot-a bath," Luigi moaned, "My muscles I didn't know-a I had are aching-a!"<p>

It was late afternoon and it was nearly time for me to retrieve Bowser for our promised stroll. He had missed the entire day's fun, and something about finally seeing him made my pulse race. I guess I didn't realize I would miss him so much; I wonder what I'll do when he returns to the Darklands, what about when the other suitors return home tomorrow?

"_Whew!"_ Wolfe wiped his forehead, "Being you is tiring, Daisy."

I barked out a laugh, smiling wickedly, "Why, you boys sound a little tired. _Aww_ what's wrong, can't handle being a _princess_ for a day?"

Ryu laughed, "It's just as I thought, I may have been a Shinobi my whole life, but ballet is the real deadly art. And your instructor is one of the deadliest, most battle-hardened assassins I've _met_."

"See! And you boys thought it was easy," I smirked locking both Ryu and Silver into one-armed hugs. I turned to Luigi and playfully poked him in the stomach. Lulu must have been ticklish as he emitted a wave of laughter.

"I never t-thought it'd be easy..." Silver admitted quietly, "B-But I agree with Ryu. Your dance instructor is uh...w-well, kind of...evil."

"Hell, I won't lie! I thought your life would be _suuuuper _easy!" Wolfe laughed, "Aren't most princess' fed a steady diet of manicures and shopping spree galore?! Actually all this hard work you do makes me like you more."

The usual fierce, vibrant gleam in Wolfe's golden eyes warmed as his wild smile mellowed. The rich color of his eyes made me think of a honeycomb; whenever Wolfe softened up, there was something terribly disarming and charismatic about him. As a Canine it was bred in his bones to be brave, feral and wild, but when it came to me, he was sweet and showed his own brand of rough chivalry.

"Wolfe," Zero appeared and against the golden burn of late afternoon, his form was entirely a dark silhouette, "Would you mind joining me? It'd only be a moment."

Wolfe remained at ease, though something behind his eyes sharpened, "Yeah sure man, what is it?"

Zero made a motion for Wolfe to follow and with nothing else said, he turned and walked down the hall, long dark coat trailing behind his steps like a shadow; whatever Zero had to say, he didn't want me, or anyone else present. Wolfe stared after him before facing me with a smile, "Be right back Sugarplum."

I beamed as Silver half-laughed, "_Sugarplum_!?"

"Yup, that's my nickname for my princess," Wolfe nuzzled his nose against mine before pulling away and jogging after Zero, "So don't steal it! Besides Ry calls her 'Dogo' or something."

Ryu arched a brow subtly, "...You mean _Deiji_?"

"Yeah that. Later!" And with an enthusiastic wave, Wolfe turned to follow Zero.

* * *

><p>Wolfe walked down the silent hallway with only the sound of his clomping boots echoing through the deserted halls. Zero's recognizable scent was a fusion of leather, papers and books and the longer Wolfe traveled the hall way, the stronger the councilor's scent grew.<p>

It wasn't much longer when Wolfe found Zero peering over the Sarasalandian skyline, arms crossed and expression blank as he stared over the glowing horizon of the nearby capital city. The golden blaze of the sun set the entire sky afire in a scintillating topaz brilliance that made the skyscrapers and buildings seem as if they were made of solid gold.

Wolfe placed a hand on his hip and tapped his foot in a show of impatience, "Alright Zero. What is it you wanted to see me for? If you've invited me out here just to insult me again, I'm going to punch you in the face."

Zero poured himself a glass of tea-colored liquor into an expensive crystal glass, "Would you like a glass? Aged Luma bourbon goes down smooth."

"Nah, pass," Wolfe scrunched up his face, "Besides you might have poisoned it or something."

"Come now Wolfe, where's the fun in that? I've _expressly _planned to kill you with my bare hands," though straight-faced, there was an amused twinkle in Zero's eyes that refuted any validity in his statement.

"...Yeah see, that's creepy when you do that. You need to work on your people skills...I almost couldn't tell you were joking."

"Jokes side, there's something I've been curious about," Zero finally gave his full attention to Wolfe, coffee eyes bright under the strong dessert sun, "Yesterday night, you saved King Bowser. Why?"

"Why?" Wolfe frowned in confusion, "Why _what_?"

"Why did you help him?" Zero replied simply.

"Wouldn't any reasonable person have helped him?" Wolfe asked, "Or did what they could have to help?"

"Maybe," Zero shifted his drink," but not to the lengths you went through."

"Would _you_ have helped him?" Wolfe asked softly, "Be me for a sec, if some group of jackasses knocked you out—or _tried_ to—and then you see them beating the crap out of Bowser, you wouldn't have tried to help him?"

Zero mediated on his words long enough for a stale gap of silence to pass, "I certainly wouldn't have ran in there and risked my neck for him. Or if I did get involved, it would have been to pay them back and not to help King Bowser."

Wolfe shrugged, not knowing what to say.

"So, it really didn't cross your mind that you were helping a rival?" Zero asked, no inflection in his voice, and yet he was studying Wolfe carefully, "Someone you know who is _very_ close to Princess Sarasaland? It might have actually behooved you to have let him die."

Wolfe froze, shock and even horror contorting his features before they settled into an incredulous glare, "_What!?_ How could you even _say_ that!? Are you agreeing with what Taurus did!?"

"No. Not one bit. Taurus has made a political move so irrefutably stupid that he's not only managed to piss off Sarasaland, but also the Darklands, the Mushroom Kingdom, Moonstone, and of course as you know, Land's End."

"Did you just say 'political move'!? As in you only care about political crap?" Wolfe frowned, "What about Taurus being a deplorable son of a bitch and trying to have Bowser killed for no reason? And not to mention his guards, people, whatever they were attacked me too."

"I won't pretend that it wasn't a low down thing to do," Zero shrugged, "But we both know King Bowser is neither a victim nor is he completely innocent. If anything that may have been some sort of karma for all of the wicked deeds he has done. And truthfully I think you were nothing more than collateral damage; Taurus wasn't after you, but it was certainly a bonus that he got a free shot in on you."

Wolfe glared, staring at Zero with the hopes of understanding him. Was it even worth trying to figure the laconic Desert councilor out?

Maybe his mom had been right when she had characterized her son as blindly optimistic; an intrinsic part of Wolfe believed that everyone had some shred of good in them and that no one was irredeemable.

_Except_ Taurus.

And he had originally believed the same thing about Bowser. When Wolfe first saw the Koopa King in person, the proud warrior in his blood pined for the chance to test his strength against the biggest, baddest dude out there. Also, a major chunk of him wanted to soundly kick the king's ass for giving poor Princess Peach such a hard time.

He _really_ didn't like guys who were mean to girls. But over these past few days, Wolfe had not only come to change his mind, but he genuinely liked Bowser.

There were far too many likeable similarities the king shared with the members of the Canine clan, and Bowser wasn't really as mean as he pretended to be.

As he had misjudged Bowser, had he mistakenly misjudging Zero too? But it was so difficult to understand Zero because everything he said was so confusing and when Zero did finally make sense, his words were so blunt and jarring that it usually pissed off anyone with a reasonable moral compass.

Deciding that he was indeed wasting his time having an internal debate, Wolfe turned away, glaring at the setting sky, "You know why I helped him?" the Canine heir spoke softly, "Because I can relate to him."

Amused, Zero arched an eyebrow, "How so? By having scales? Breathing fire? Being the king of the most powerful nation?"

"Not all that unimportant stuff," Wolfe's expression lost the hard edge, "Lots of people look down on Koopas for being different. I can relate 'cause Canines get that a lot too. There's tons of idiots who say we're inferior, and savages and stupid stuff like that. And I don't know if Bowser was singled out for being or Koopa, or because Taurus just didn't like him...or..."

"Or because he was trying to get back at the Princess?" Zero added.

"Or maybe for all three reasons, but either way...I don't think I could have lived with myself if I didn't help him," Wolfe muttered quietly.

Zero studied his profile as he silently sipped at the iced beverage, "I hate to admit it, but think I've underestimated you. Originally I thought you were terrifically simple but you're a good guy. You're even noble enough to help someone who's a strong love rival, risking personal injury as well."

Wolfe visibly relaxed, even flashing a true smile as he faced Zero. His eyes were nearly the same color as the topaz sky and just as bright. And since the ambience was friendly, Zero fired off a last question, "You think he would have done the same for you? King Bowser?"

Wolfe gazed past Zero's shoulder pensively, "You know what? I know he would have. Though knowing him, Bowser probably would have never let me hear the end of it."

Zero nodded his head before kicking back a longer draw of Luma burbon, relishing the smooth taste and the slight burn in the back of his throat.

"_So_..." Wolfe grinned slyly, "did you see the way that tennis trainer girl was eyeing Weegee?"

"You'd have to be blind not to have seen it. Except Luigi because he was too busy drooling over the princess."

"She's pretty cute," Wolfe spoke offhandedly, "Weegee should totally go for her, seeing as Princess Daisy is totally in love with me."

"The tennis girl is _alright_. She's a little too thin, not enough curves to be a knockout. And _please_ stop with all the lies, Wolfe. The princess would have to be brain-dead to be remotely attracted to you. She can be airheaded, but she certainly doesn't suffer from brain damage."

"I'm confused, but are we getting along here?" Wolfe tried not to sound like he was going to laugh.

Zero snorted, dusting off his dark trench coat, "_Stars_ no. I still think you're a moron. Just a noble one."

Wolfe smirked, figuring that was going to be the best and only compliment he would receive from the jerkass; maybe he had misjudged Zero after all.

Then what Zero said next made Wolfe totally reconsider, "But it's always the noble idiots who die first, because they're too noble and too stupid for their own good."

Wolfe peered at him and frowned.

Zero smirked, before smoothly offering again, "Luma bourbon?"

"Yeah, fine. Pour me a glass. I can't stand to be around you sober."

Zero laughed with actual humor, quickly pouring a glass and handing it to the Canine heir. Wolfe took a sip then scrunched his face, recoiling as he nearly spat the drink back up, "_Ugh!_ This tastes like water! How are you supposed to get drunk offa this!? You highlanders need to work on this! This is _insulting!_"

"I forget, you Canines make alcohol that's the most concentrated thing I've ever tasted. One sip probably burns your brain cells to hell—actually that would explain exactly why you are they way you are."

Wolfe smirked, "You're just mad I can drink you under a table."

They both turned to look at the sunset and Wolfe laughed, "You sure we're not friends now? We just had a manly heart to heart and everything."

Zero didn't bother to look in his direction, "Wolfe?"

"_Yeeeees?"_

"Would you kindly shut the hell up? Thanks."

* * *

><p>The afternoon was slowly melding into the sensual rich reds and oranges that bespoke of sunset's rubicund accession. Father was still busy meeting with the Grand Elder Council as the last vestiges of supper silverware were collected and cleared away.<p>

I stepped out of my bedchambers dressed in the plainest of robes and a headscarf to cover my hair; even at sundown it was a blistering 110 degrees and I had no plans of roasting.

I thought about visiting Grammy once more, but her maid had kindly shooed me away, reassuring that the empress was finally receiving a well-deserved rest. I began to head towards the guestroom suites and wrapped on the door.

The door slowly creaked open and Bowser appeared, smirking, "Ready to go—_hey_! Who is _this_? Where's my Flower?"

Bowser laughed, trying to lift the plain headscarf from my hair as I lightly swatted his intrusive hand away, "Don't you know it's 110 degrees outside!? I don't know about you but I don't want to be roasted to a crisp. You know, it might just be me but you're looking better and better each time I see you. Those starman potions must be working."

He smirked, "It won't be long 'til I'm back to being a sex symbol again."

I rolled my eyes, "You sure you don't want anything to cover your head? It's gonna be hot. Also the Towtows drool and slobber all over my clothes, so I'm not wearing anything fancy."

"I bet they _do_ drool all over you," Bowser chuckled as half of his mouth lifted into a grin, "You make one hell of a cute shepherd girl. I dig the look."

My cheeks seared as I spun away to avoid his sly smile, "W-We should get going. We're gonna take it easy considering your injuries..."

"Very well," his voice was imbued with a satiny purr, "Lead the way then _shepherd girl_."

I blinked, realizing Bowser was slowly leaning in closer. When he was nothing but inches away, a loud, pitchy squeak made him freeze. Kooples tottered over, appearing beside the king's leg. The Koopaling chirruped and cooed something to Bowser before peering at me with big, curious baby eyes.

Bowser answered back in a low rumbling purr before gently nudging him forward. Kooples sucked his thumb, checking back with Bowser one last time before ambling over and tugging at my robes.

"Well hello there Kooples. Did you enjoy your nap?" I cooed, quickly picking the Koopaling up. Kooples chirruped and yipped happily. He eventually settled, deciding to comfortably rest his head against my sternum. He seemed to relax even further as I swayed from side to side like a lazy pendulum.

Bowser smirked coolly, "It seems like you're really good with...Koopalings."

I laughed, "I dunno what to tell you Bowser, but Koopalings seem to like me more. Our babies seem so fragile and you have to cradle them a certain way or they fuss. Koopalings seem more...resilient."

"—ou like some of your own?"

I could barely hear what he had said since he had spoken so softly, "Huh? What did you say?"

He must have laughed at an inside joke, "Nothing Flower. Ready to go?"

"Yeah sure, just let me find a maid to watch over Kooples."

I deposited Kooples with an older maid who all but glowed with maternal instincts. She had been elated to watch the adorable Koopaling and told us to take as long as we wished.

It was a lengthy procession but I eventually brought Bowser to the relatively undisclosed castle pasture. Grammy was definitely right, no one would think to check for us here.

The pasture was quiet, save for the occasional bleat or baa and the rustling amongst the tall grass. Here the Towtows grazed; they were cute ram-like creatures who were curious and relatively friendly so long as they weren't abruptly awoken and if they were, they went into a terrifying murderous rampage.

The second I walked into the heard, I was greeted with a barrage of happy bleats, inquisitive baas, wandering tongues and wet noses checking my palm for any hidden treats. I reached for my leather satchel and dug out a handful of dried apple bits. The Towtows knew what that meant and they gathered around, gently nibbling from my palms.

"Hello ladies," I chirped, allowing the ewes to affectionately nudge, nibble and nip my fingers, "How are we and the little ones today? Oh don't fight! No fighting, there's plenty for all!"

More and more Towtows were herding around, nosing around for a treat and my palms definitely weren't big enough for all of them to eat from. I grinned as an idea came to mind. I took Bowser's hand and unfurled it. He shot an inquisitive glance my way as I smiled.

He watched as I dumped a small pile of dried fruit into his hand and lowered it for the Towtows to consume. At first they seemed wary, unsure of eating from the palms of a stranger but a baby Towtow who lacked the reservation of the others dove in, gobbling and slobbering all over Bowser's hand.

The king made a face and once the other Towtows saw that they were safe, they crowded around, munching happily from Bowser's outstretched palms.

"There, that isn't too bad, eh Bowser?" I smirked.

"Besides the drool, no. It kind of tickles," he spoke softly.

"I didn't know you were ticklish," I grinned.

He looked up with a grin, "You know where I'm the most ticklish at?"

"Where?"

"My neck," his grin grew slyer, "Plant a couple of kisses there and I melt like butter. Come on over and melt me—Stars these damn things are drooling everywhere."

The baby Towtows hopped around, clamoring and prancing about in wiggly, inept excitement. They were always happy to see guests, especially someone new they hadn't seen before. Their stubby tails wagged as they bleated loudly, sniffing and nosing around near Bowser. A few of the Towtow babies padded closer and I quickly reached into my satchel and fed them treats, "And I see the little ones are good."

Standing a ways off and being standoffish as usual was the alpha of the Towtows, a prideful male I had named Noozles. _What!?_ Yeah, I know it's a silly name but I had been three when I gave him that name!

Noozles was the biggest of the Towtows, towering an impressive eight-ish feet in height with an ego and a temper that could rival both the circumference and intensity of the sun.

Noozles stood in the open pasture, burly form proud and tall as his impressive, spiraling pearly horns glimmered under the desert sunlight. With his head held to the sky, Noozles peered down his nose at everything and everyone with a bored, pretentious gaze.

I had shepherded Noozles and his flock since childhood and that was the only way to gain the alpha's trust. Noozles pretended to ignore me, all the while watching from the corner of his vision. He was just too proud to completely turn his head and look my way.

Towtow alphas were very territorial and reacted violently when they felt their flock or terrain threatened, but I had been around the flock long enough to become familiar. I approached Noozles, reaching into my satchel to offer him a handful of treats, "Hey there Big guy. Want some treats? C'mon, I know you do."

Noozles had too much pride to hungrily wolf down treats from my palm in an undignified manner. He pretended to hover impassively nearby and just when I turned to leave, he bent his large head down and devoured the treat with relish. I laughed, giving his shaggy wool one good pat, "Noozles, must we _always_ put on a stern front. We both know you love treats just like everyone else."

He snorted before turning away and resuming his post as guardian of his flock. When I walked back to Bowser, Noozles glared in his direction.

Noozles halted, posture becoming rigid. He carefully watched Bowser from the corner of his eye, raising his nose to discreetly scent the wind.

The babes wobbled on unsteady hind legs near their mothers who were mindlessly munching on dinner. I smiled, strolling through the pasture at a pace slow enough to accommodate Bowser's careful limp. As prideful as ever, Bowser kept a straight face, pretending that he wasn't in pain. But his obvious limp said otherwise.

"So what do you think of our pastures?" I held out my arms, gesturing towards the wide span of fertile meadow. The Towtows ate, slept, snored and played amongst the thick golden meadow.

Bowser peered around, brows furrowed with thought, "It's alright. I didn't think Sarasaland would have their princess working as a humble shepherd though. Still don't get the thought behind that one."

"Father always hated the idea of raising a spoiled heir. So, to make sure I grew up well-rounded, he had me try my hand at everything in the palace: the chefs taught me the basics of cooking, I helped the stable hands clean the steed stables, I learned how to garden with the groundskeepers, play sports, you name it!"

"Ah, I see," Bowser arched a brow, smirking with amusement, "So you could run the entire palace if need be."

"Hmm, you know, I didn't even think of it that way," I smiled up at him, "Did your Father have you do anything like that?"

"No. It was beneath me," Before I could correct him, Bowser continued, "Morton thought chores were for commoners. He only had me doing things that were regal; learning war strategy, combat, anything that could make me ruthless. Things a warrior king would need to know."

I tried to be discreet when I peered over at him. I gratuitously studied the impressive, sculpted muscles in his arms and the spiked bands only seemed to draw attention to the corded glory of his biceps. Was his entire form that muscular?

Then a flicker of him on the cruiser came to mind; Stars yes he _was_. Even as a child I had always had a thing for muscles; I even remember being no older than seven when I boldly declared to Lady Angora how I wanted to marry a big, strong pirate because pirates were big and had tons of muscles.

Lady Angora of course had been horrified.

Grammy on the other hand had laughed her ass off.

"...Oh," I whispered, not knowing what to add, "Warrior king huh? That would certainly explain all those pretty muscles. You look like a statue sculptors made in ancient times..."

We both froze, startled by the words that had accidentally popped out of my mouth. I hastily cursed, slapping a hand to my treacherous mouth; _sheyt!_ Was my brain and mouth linked together in some kind of messed up telepathy!?

Bowser slowly turned to face me with an incomprehensible expression that set my temperature ablaze. I could feel the blood rushing to my face as I stammered, "Uh...w-what I meant by that w-was...um..."

He still seemed astonished, and I was surprised when just the faintest pink glow lit his cheeks. He peered at me almost diffidently, "Flower? Are you...saying you l-like how I—?"

Bowser blinked when he felt a tiny nudge against his leg. He peered down at a newborn male Towtow named Fiddlesticks, who's tiny, spiraling horns hadn't grown in yet. The Towtow bleated before moving back, pawing the earth with a tiny hoof to prepare for a second charge. I laughed; _was Fiddle challenging Bowser in a show of dominance!? Was he fighting to protect me?_

I burst into laughter, "Bowser! I think Fiddlesticks is trying to tell you to get off his turf!"

Bowser smirked, eyes narrowed to slits, "The lil _punk_ thinks he can kick _my_ ass, huh? I know a challenge when I see one. What are we about to throw down for? Are we fighting over a shepherd girl? Well then game _on_."

The king grinned wickedly, dropping into a three-point stance and nearly mirroring the way Fiddlesticks lowered his head. As Fiddlesticks blinked, peering in Bowser's direction warily, the Koopa king chuckled before releasing one low, reverberating growl that frightened the poor thing.

Fiddlesticks blinked large dark eyes, before bleating in fear. He fell over carelessly, bleating and calling out as he hurriedly scampered behind my leg.

I laughed, patting Fiddlestick's head and digging into my satchel for a treat, "Shame on you Bowser! How dare you mess with Fiddlesticks like that! He's only trying to protect me from you!"

Bowser's loud chortle filled the air. He grinned largely, rising to his full height, "Little bugger punk got what he deserved if he's trying to keep me from you. No force on earth can keep me from yo—"

And before Bowser could finish, there was a loud, shrill gnarr and something plowed into him, knocking him off his feet and onto his ass. _Noozles _had plowed into him like a freight train.

I cursed viciously; rushing over to the felled king, "Bowser! O-Oh my Stars! Are you _okay_!?"

Something flickered in the corner of my vision. Noozles was half-way across the pasture, prancing away with a loping, prideful scamper in his gait. Noozles peered at Bowser from the corner of his eyes with a conceited, smug stare that screamed; yeah, I did just put you flat on your ass.

I covered my mouth, trying to stifle my laughter. Bowser shot up, shaking his head clear and glared, catching the tail end of Noozle's triumphant trot.

The King's visage twisted in fury as he growled wildly, snorting smoke and tendrils of fire from his nostrils, "_That horny little bastard!"_

Bowser rose to his feet unsteadily, growling and beginning to stomp towards Noozles with clear, foreboding intent. I quickly rushed in front of him, placing my palms onto his shell to prevent his march, "Bowser! Whoa! Calm down! He didn't mean anything by it!"

"'Didn't mean anything' my _ass_," Bowser growled, fists raised and eyes blazing, "He knew _exactly_ what the hell he was doing! Starting shit all willy nilly! This...ram...goat..._whatever_ he is, if it wants to lock horns with the king then he'd gonna get _the king_!" He growled.

Then I thought of something, "Bowser...?"

"Oh no, no no, don't try to talk me out of this Flower. He knows _exactly_ what he did. Look, he's _still _prancing around."

"Bowwy!"

"_What_?" he growled thickly, still fuming.

Then I thought of something, half laughing as I said it,"...Did you just call Noozles a horny bastard!?"

"..." His fury dissipated as he blinked, peering down at me wordlessly.

"..."

In one similar breath, we both burst into laughter. Bowser continued laughing before he suddenly quit, turning once again to chase down Noozles. I was still laughing as I raced after him, grabbing his arm to halt him, "Come on, just chill. Please?"

Then I thought of something, and with a sly smirk, "_Por favorre mi golgo_?"

Bowser couldn't hide his grin if he tried, "Had to bust out the friggin' big guns on me huh? I give. I give hundreds of times over with you and that voice."

I grinned cheekily, "Maybe I just know what works on you."

The king chuckled, "Fine...so where were we? Right. Walking. Wanna take a little walk? I still don't trust that Noodles guy."

"_Noozles_."

"Yeah, him."

We began to stroll around the pasture, petting and feeding the Towtows who had been friendly enough to encroach us. Even Bowser began to feed the occasional baby, watching as they chewed apple bits from his large palms.

"You know," I spoke softly, "In Sarasalandian culture, couples take strolls together."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

I looked away, "I mean that, when two people are romantically involved, they take strolls together and it's known that they're dating."

"Really?" Bowser smirked slyly, "So if someone saw us right now...?"

I laughed, "Yes, they'd think we were seeing each other. You can usually judge their relationship by their closeness. Married couples walk close enough that they're usually touching in some way or another."

"That's interesting," the king smirked.

After that shared information, it wasn't lost on me when Bowser began to discreetly shift closer. He was so close I could feel the warmth of form. I finally broke into laughter as the king shot an amused grin my way, "What?"

"Do you think you're slick!? Like I wouldn't notice that?" I laughed, lightly shoving his arm, "You totally moved closer."

"Does it bother you?" he asked, smiling with less intensity.

I didn't even think twice, "No, it doesn't."

Bowser's expression softened genially and he must have been content since he didn't feel the need to speak another word. Sunset blazed across the desert sky in flaming braids of topaz and ruby. The blistering heat had long dissolved and the desert was starting to slither into unbearable glacial cold; even during summer, Sarasaland's desert was treacherous and terribly capricious, scalding hot during the day and deathly cold at night.

Behind us lay the Towtows' pasture. I sat on the wooden fence, peering up at the sky as Bowser stood by my side, arms crossed and expression thoughtful.

I was more than aware of how every now and then his arm would brush against mine, and yet he never shied away; Bowser seemed perfectly comfortable. The air adopted an unsavory chill and I tried not to make it too obvious when I leaned against him; he was always warm.

As he studied the sky with his standard fierce glower, I wondered what he thought about. Is he meditating on something profound, like life's trials or are his thoughts shallow like a stream, contemplating when he'd eat his next meal or the next movie he'd see.

"You worried _Purga_?" The soft, deep voice of my best friend was shrouded in velvet.

"A little," I whispered. The cool wind shoved wild, unruly curls into my face. With an impatient sweep of my hand, I pushed the whipping red tendrils from my eyes and retied the headdress over my head, "I wish this whole thing would just blow over. You know, in the beginning I wished something would come along and interrupt my courtship so I wouldn't have to get married. Wish granted, in a twisted, bitter kind of way."

I sighed deeply, peering up at the blood-red sky. Another annoying gust of wind sprayed curly fringe into my eyes. I blew a raspberry, impatiently shoving my hair back from my face.

While I was fighting a losing battle against the fierce wind, Bowser was carefully studying my profile. I ignored it, until I noticed he was _continuing_ to stare. A large flush crept up my face as he proactively studied my features with calm, thoughtful eyes. _What gives!? Just how long has he been looking at me like that for!?_

Fed up with being embarrassed, I snapped around, "_W-What_?" I breathed unsteadily, "You've been_ looking _at me for a whole minute now!"

I expected Bowser to become defensive, or at least deny the action, but he didn't. His vigilant expression never wavered, "Does that make you nervous?" He asked quietly in a low, quiet voice.

_Huh?_

Whoa! _Whoa!_ I was so startled I turned and looked at him. The usual sly blaze of mischief his eyes held had softened. His expression was both soft yet serious. I froze, lips parted as I drank in the new, ruminative aura.

Bowser was carefully watching, observing me with an unusual intelligence and care I didn't think him capable of having. He was no longer irrational or hot tempered but composed, and I found that I had to take him seriously.

"Me nervous? Around _you_?" I tried to ignore the way my voice cracked.

But instead of rolling his eyes as he normally would when I lied terribly, Bowser continued to meticulously study my face, trying to decipher what I was really thinking, what I was truly trying to hide. In two seconds flat my face burned so red, "Bowser! W-What the hell!?"

"What?" he barely smirked, "I thought I didn't make you nervous...?"

"_Wha_—? Y-You don't it's just..." I floundered terribly.

"You sure?" he spoke in a smooth, cool drawl, amusement coloring his voice, "Your heart rate accelerated, eyes dilated, all signs that you're indeed _nervous_."

His last word died away softly into a sparse whisper, and I was suddenly aware of how close Bowser was drawing to me and how intensely he continued to watch me; it only seemed to make my heart race crazier.

"Uh...You're just..." I choked up, mind reeling in dizzying circles, "What are you _d-doing_?"

He carefully moved a lock of hair from my face. As he did so, he smoothed a claw across my cheekbone, "You had hair in your eyes, it wasn't uncomfortable was it?"

I stared; what does fixing my hair have to do with him touching my face!? Bowser smirked knowingly, red eyes alive like fire; _what was going on here_!? Bowser suddenly didn't seem like the lovable moron I could trick and laugh at.

There was something intelligent about this new Bowser and I suddenly didn't see him as my ill-tempered, seemingly dull-witted friend. Was I finally dealing with the ruling entity of the Darklandians? The king who spearheaded the most successful kingdom.

I swallowed nervously; who _was_ this Koopa? The one with the silky, deep voice and the hypnotic, intelligent eyes. _This_ Bowser seemed as different as day is to night. Like the hot, wild sun that rules the day so was Bowser hot-tempered and blazing with vitality.

He was hilarious, crass and raw as hell, whereas this _new _Koopa was cool and tranquil as the nightshade. This Koopa didn't have an overinflated ego and thought before he spoke. I couldn't read him but he sure could read me.

And it _freaked_ me out.

I was going to refer to him as Pensive Bowser. And Pensive Bowser was effortlessly cutting through my calm and surety. One moment Bowser's expression was meditative and the next it liquidly shifted into amusement. He suddenly grinned, peering down at me, "_Yes_?"

"Huh? I didn't...say anything..."

"You were staring for a while, so I figure you must want to know something. That or you just realized how majestic I look during sunset."

I laughed; was Pensive Bowser gone? Was I in the clear now? The relaxed, carefree air made me think so. Thank the Stars..."I was wondering what you were thinking about before..."

_Before you went Pensive Bowser on me._

"Things," he shrugged noncommittally, "Like how the Koopalings are doing and I hope the twins haven't drawn mustaches and monocles on all the ancestor portraits again. I'm also wondering how many more days I have before I've got to leave Sarasaland. A shitstorm is waiting back at home."

"I guess I should have known," I replied softly, "I knew you'd leave eventually but..."

"Flower, let it be known I don't want to go," Bowser sighed deep enough to exhale smoke, "But any monarchy that's anywhere near intelligent is going to order their king to leave your borders. Not only is the safest action, but it's also the most neutral."

"Yeah, I know," I whispered.

Bowser grinned, "Okay. Your turn. What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Didn't realize this was a game," I mused quietly, "Fine. What do you think? Do you think this will all smooth over?"

Bowser peered at the sunset, eyes nearly the same color as the sky. The rich garnet red sky reflected so deeply within his eyes, I could barely make the distinction between the glowing sky and his irises, "It can go lots of ways, Flower, nothing's black and white in the political world. In the best case scenario everything can be smoothed out, a new treaty made or..."

"Or?" I nearly choked on the word.

He tried to sound nonchalant, "Or they break off the treaty for good and Sarasalandian finds a new water source."

I shook my head," How are we going to acquire that much water in so little time? The Grand council already said they've started taping into the reserve wells. Rain season this year was nonexistent and going to another kingdom leaves us wide open for price inflation. So how are we going to stock up without completely emptying the treasuries?"

Bowser chuckled sonorously, "Flower, when I said you'd protect you, I didn't just mean from physical harm. I meant from anything; that extends to your kingdom, protecting your people's well-being, etcetera."

Hope fluttered in my chest. I turned to face him, surprise and awe glowing on my features, "Bowser...Are you—? Wait, no. I can't let you do all that. Your offer is kind. Too kind. And I really appreciate it but I can't—"

He waved me off, "I'm _not _going to hear otherwise and I'm definitely not going to take a no for an answer," Bowser grinned wildly, "You're just going to accept I'm helping you and that's that."

Bowser...I, how am I supposed to repay your kindness?" I whispered, "I'm really touched you're...I-I..."

"You seem stunned," he purred, "maybe even awed...?"

"'Cause I am! Thank you Bowser...and really I mean that," I could feel a treacherous scald of blush building on my face.

"Just keep it in the back of your mind, the King of the studs always has a plan B. Let's say I know a few people and I might have a few contacts that can get Sarasaland water. How much water do you need anyways? You ought to shoot some figures my way so Big Daddy can make it happen."

I did the math in my head; the five main districts each had five, ten-gallon wells. So one district alone needed fifty gallons of water, so all five would need a whopping two hundred and fifty gallons.

"Two fifty."

"Done," Bowser smirked, snapping his claws. He peered back at me through a conceited half-lidded stare, "And free of charge."

"That's not going to happen. What about the Firelands? They're not going to give us all that water!"

"I'll think of something," Bowser growled, "It's going to be a struggle, but Sarasaland _will_ get their water. Firelands be damned."

"Also we're a decent Kingdom ran by decent people and we'll pay—"

Bowser pressed the tip of his index claw against my lip. I halted, lips parted to speak before shutting altogether. "We _are _allies after all, huh? So why not let me help. _Really_ help. This is one of the few times Sarasaland really needs our assistance."

"...Alright," I whispered. Bowser grinned largely when my lips moved against his finger; purring even, "Thank you Bowser."

I was surprised when I received a melting gaze and a sonorous purr, "You're welcome _Purga_."

He half grinned, eyes glinting wickedly. He pressed his index claw to his mouth then pressed the same finger against my lips. I was confused, before realizing he had indirectly kissed me. He laughed deeply when I glowed three different shades of red. Flustered, I grumbled under my breath, glaring at the Towtows.

I peered at him with wonder and there must have been something about my expression as he suddenly turned to face me completely, glowing eyes sharp and endless.

"What is it?" He whispered.

"I'm awed by how...great of a friend you are. Really," I shook my head, smiling at him, "I mean it. And yet you want nothing in return."

I blushed warmly; Bowser may have been egoistic and arrogant at times, but there were moments like this that made my heart pound. This facet of his personality was wonderful, he was so generous, so chivalrous… even his eyes reflected the warmth I felt. It was touching.

"Friend and protector," he whispered deeper, "And maybe I was a _little_ dishonest. There _might_ be something I want..."

He softly tugged the headscarf from my head, gently untangling it from my hair as the cool night air raised a shiver. He touched my face and I leaned in towards his warm palm.

"Alright my little shepherd girl, you're getting cold and I'm gonna walk you back in. The Towtow bastards are eavesdropping. Especially Mister Horny back there."

I turned around and sure enough Noozles was eying Bowser from the corner of his vision, sniffing the wind. I broke into squabbles of laughter, "You lay off Noozles, he's just trying to protect me."

"He can get in line. I'm your one and only..." he suddenly grinned, "_protector _that is."

Bowser started to hobble towards the palace grounds trying to walk upright and as stalwartly as any soldier. I shook my head; what did he get out of pretending to be macho? I could see the bruises and those that were hidden were tightly secured with fresh bandages.

I rushed to his side, "Slow down. Let's not rush back."

"You don't have to slow down for—"

"Because I want to spend as much time with you as I can," I smiled.

Bowser halted, carefully studying my expression before grinning largely and his tail wagged so wildly I burst out laughing, "As you wish _shepherd girl_."

We walked—Bowser finally didn't have to hobble too badly at our new, relaxed pace—so close to one another that our arms brushed with every other movement. And though I didn't say anything, I could hear Bowser's soft, content purr and I'm glad I wasn't the only one happy.

* * *

><p>It was four am and quite frankly the councilmen were exhausted. They were well-dressed in their official robes and polished silver headdresses but the blood-shot eyes were evidence of their lack of rest.<p>

The Emperor sat stationed above all others, poised behind an imposing wall of furnished marble. A nameless maid finished delivering each councilor a cup of steaming tea and with a customary bow, she left the room as silent as a shadow.

The emperor began, his resonant voice smooth like butter, even at an unholy hour, "Good morning gentlemen. We are still gathered here because we have entered a state of crisis. As you all are aware of, Prince Aqualand has terminated our alliance and subsequently terminated our supply of water. It will be months, weeks before Sarasaland finds herself in a drought."

"Is there any way to redeem the alliance?" One councilor spoke up, "You shall meet with him in three days' time and we've toiled hard for many years, decades even to secure a neutral alliance with the Aqualands."

Sakuro gave a stern disapproving glance, "Then unfortunately it was a vain toil. Our allegiance is no longer neutral. They have disrespected our princess and terminated our alliance. They are lucky if we do not go to war over such a debauchery."

"Zero told me of what had happened last night," Salini spoke in a reflective voice, "He tried to take advantage of our princess. It is because of _him_ that the Darkalands are holding us accountable. If there is any backlash for this, then it should be from _us_. Taurus is arrogant, thinking this will stand."

"Right," another councilor nodded his head, "but since they hold all the cards, we are at their mercy."

Another councilor spoke, "I vote we end all contact with these vile creatures. They should be thanking their lucky Stars we haven't gone after their prince for his crimes committed against our princess."

Salini frowned, "No. We must set aside ego and do what is best for the people. We must do whatever it takes to keep this alliance so that our wells never run dry and our people will never thirst."

"Lord Salini, this man has assaulted the _princess. _There _is _no reasoning with him!_"_

"And there will be no reasoning with dehydrated citizens who will hold riots when they revolt!"

The verbal pingpong match began to pick up pace as the Emperor coolly reclined, listening to the debate amongst the councilors. It didn't seem as if they were going to end anytime soon.

Sakuro closed his eyes, discreetly massaging his temples; they had been discussing this _same_ issue all day and it didn't seem as if they could resolve anything.

The media was boring down on them; digging anywhere they could to find gems of information. The stalkerrazzai had been questioning local radio stations, interviewing part-time maids and servants who had finished their shifts for the day at the palace. This whole catastrophe was one gigantic nightmare.

"That's preposterous Salini. These people want _us _to apologize when our princess was assaulted!? _Us!?" _A nameless councilor laughed disbelievingly, "What madness."

"But you can't deny that Lord Salini has a point," the verbal spar continued as another councilor interjected, "Our people need water and already we've begun to use the reserve wells. The people will riot if we lose much more."

"Stars this is complicated."

"So what should we do?"

All eyes turned to look at the emperor. Sakuro sighed, wearily rubbing at the bridge of his nose, "It is unwise to engage those who have counted themselves as enemies. However, we cannot simply ignore the painful truth: they have a good we need. We are in a state of lack and we must proceed with caution. Prince Taurus has shown himself as impetuous and immature, we must factor such things into account."

"Well said Emperor," Salini narrowed his eyes, "But what course of action shall be taken? Time is dwindling and so is our water."

"I vote—"

The door to the courtroom was thrown open. In rushed Alabaster in a flurry of desert robes, waving his arms around in panic, "EMPEROR! EMPEROR! _The sky is falling_!"

He ran around the front of the podium, waving his arms and running in circles as he squawked. Half of the councilors stared at him incredulously as the others glared at his lack of decorum.

"You. Servant boy. This is not a bazaar," Salini snapped at the young servant, "This is a royal courthouse, you will use the proper decorum or shall you find yourself held in contempt."

"EMP—!" Alabaster fell flat on his face.

The guards began to ominously encroach Alabaster, ready to detain him. Sakuro raised a hand and immediately the guards halted, "Lord Salini it must be important if Alabaster has stormed into here. He knows how important our court proceedings are."

"Yes!" Alabaster exclaimed, "It's _very_ important!"

The Emperor's glacial stare warmed a fraction, "Please calm yourself, you're making everyone nervous. And once you're ready, please deliver your message Alabaster."

"Emperor!" Alabaster hopped up and down, hoping to get his liege's attention, "I have an urgent notice from Prince Jackas—_erm_—Prince _Taurus _of the Aqualands! As you know, he requests a meeting with you in three days' time. _Three_. But there's more!"

"He's making another demand upon us?" Salini scoffed skeptically, "The arrogance of this child knows no bounds."

"Emperor," Alabaster's eyes shone with worry, as he rushed the Emperor's podium, "He demands a meeting with you and _only _you or he's going to declare war against Sarasaland!"

The one word that no one wanted to hear had been finally uttered. The entire day it had been carefully skirted around and stepped over but now that war had been unleashed, the cool temperament and faked calm was terrifically destroyed.

A contagious wave of fear pulsed through the council as they muttered amongst one another with rising trepidation until the hushed whispering rose in decibel. The courtroom was nearly deafening and the moment Sakuro raised his hand, all sound hushed.

Sakuro peered at Alabaster, his expression closed, "Is this message accurate?"

"Yes sir," Alabaster peered up at him, eyes shining with emotion, "What will we do?"

Again, all heads looked to the emperor. Sakuro remained silent, impassive before he spoke, "Our choice is simple. Within three days' time, I shall meet with the prince."

* * *

><p>Alice: Thanks for reading! How about you leave a review! :)<p> 


	28. Nails: Negotiations

Alice: (Terrible Mario accent) Hey Pisanos!

Ultrra: (Not-so-bad Mario accent) It's-a the Super Tomboy and-a The Super Beast-a Show!

Alice: Yeeeeeah! Let's get hooked on the brothers!

(Both Alice and Ultrra jam out to the hip, totally cool '80's Super Mario Bros. Theme Song rap)

Alice: That's right pisanos, it's time for another update. ^_^ But first!

Ultrra: (Sings) Review mail tiiiiime~

Alice: Wow Ultrra, that wasn't half bad! O_O

Ultrra: Thank you very much

Alice: So before I start, firstly (Hands Ultrra an airhorn) Take this.

Ultrra: Alice...in most of our interactions you usually confuse me. But this is new. So uh, what the hell is this for? XD

Alice: Anytime you think I'm going to give away a future spoiler, air horn me. XD

Ultrra: Alright, if you insist. X)

Alice: Okay, yes! The Ninji _will _play a huuuuuuge role in the future. They're not forgotten. You're correct to assume that they're lurking around somewhere. I'm glad my work inspires you! ^_^ It goes both ways, your reviews, favorites, adds, everything inspires me! ^_^

Ultrra: Just know I'm going to abuse the HELL out of this air horn. C'mon, I wanna _use it!_ XD

Alice: Hmm, interesting. You're thinking Taurus will_—_?

Ultrra: ^_^ (blows air horn) _ERRRRRRT!_

Alice: XD Okay...uh...next review...Yep, when the new smash bros comes out in...winter? I'm just going to be like 'you want pain, here's my friend code...thing...' XD Prince Prick!? XDDDDDD Omg XDDDDDDD Omg, I've gone into my ugly laugh now. I try to update fast, well, as fast as I can but I think more reviewers like long chapters versus quicker reviews...? Right? O_O

Ultrra: You know, I too would like Bowser to storm into a council meeting and just...well, for a lack of terms, just smack the paint off folks XDD I understand that it's probably the last thing a king should do, but it seems very Bowserly. Then he can limp out XD

Alice: XD When Wolfe did the ballerino walk, he's a trained hunter, so he _can_ be quiet when he concentrates and wishes to. But his normal personality is loud and bold. :) I hope I've made this clear in this chapter. Bowser didn't contact the Koopalings 'cause the Firelands are monitoring his moves closely. If he tells his kids 'I'm cool, don't worry about me' it could get back to the Firelands who would a) make him leave or b) just give him unnecessary grief. Though Bowser's going to_—_

Ultrra: (blows airhorn) _ERRRRTT!_

Alice: Dang it. XD Oh no sister, O_O I _totally _had to learn to write well. :) I have several old fics on here and if you skim through them you can see where I'm improved. Or at least I hope you can see improvement. XP

Ultrra: Really? I see no improvement. X)

Alice: You can shut 'cha mouth. XP Hey! It has been awhile! ^_^ (waves) I'm glad you like rereading the story. I actually reread books 'cause there's tons of things I always miss when I read it a first time. :) Hmm, I'm not sure about a sequel O_O But we'll see ;D Though if you asked, you could probably get me to. XDD No for real, I would...I'm also very bribable. Like _very..._

Ultrra: XD Lol I can't remember what century King Boo is from but he's AMAZING. XD You can be sure you're not bored with him around.

Alice: No, this story doesn't end here. ^_^ I think (looks at notes) we're halfway through? Hey! (waves unawkwardly) Finals are a great time to find a good story! Just read it on your study break! :) (thinks) Ah Daisy and her romantic prowess...thing. X) Yeah, sorry but not sorry ;). If she_—_

Ultrra: (Airhorns) _ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTT!_ X)

Alice: (Sigh) Okay. It's time to begin the sto_—_

_ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRT!_

Alice: What was THAT for? O_O That wasn't even a spoiler.

Ultrra: Yeah I know. I just had to get that out of my system XD. Also Alice writes everything. The crazy, perky author-girl whose blood is like 50% sugar and 50% coffee concentrate writes 99.9% of this story. Me? I just look it over and either say, 'hey, not bad' or 'what in the world is this' all credit goes to her. X)

Alice: Aww, stank you very much Ultrra. ^_^

Ultrra: Yes. stank me very much. You guys read, review and enjoy! (blows air horn) _ERRRRRRTTTT!_

* * *

><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

* * *

><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>The awakening sky was a slice of both night and the blossoming new day, oozing with rich blues, breaths of indigo and purples and the occasional dawning oranges winked in the atmosphere.<p>

Alabaster had walked into my room with a tray of freshly baked honey tarts and fragrant, warm milk tea. It couldn't have been later than four AM.

Hair askew in a nest of crazed curls, I grumbled incoherent grunts, groggily shoveling food into my face as Alabaster happily prepped Firefly's baby Fireflower formula. He tested the bottle and handed it to my pet who eagerly sucked down his breakfast with noisy, happy slurps.

Eyes half-closed from sleep and irritated from being awoken too soon, I turned and shot a lethargic glare at Firefly, "Fire, _stop _drinkin' so fast...You're gonna get sick."

Firefly pouted, hissing and flapping his leaves angrily but he eventually slowed down, consuming his breakfast at a reasonable rate. Alabaster collected my finished plates and smirked, "Can't blame him for being so mad. You _do_ look like a swamp monster."

I arched an eyebrow, "Oh? _You_ want to make fun of _me _huh? Alabaster, don't go down that road with me. Don't do it."

Alabaster threw his arms out in a playful, challenging gesture, "Oh I'm goin' alright, Sister. Wha'cha gonna do about it?"

"Don't do it. I'll own you in Mom jokes. Besides, you should be extra nice to me today," I smirked.

"And why's that?" he huffed, "I'm not paid to be nice to you."

"Actually I think you _are_," I laughed, "Besides, if you're nice to me, I just _might_ tell you that Peach is arriving at the palace today."

Alabaster halted, nearly stumbling and falling on his face. His jaw dropped with little dignity as his eyes gleamed like stars, "_Puh-Puh-Princess_?" he squeaked, "Princess _Peach_!? S-She's coming here!? _Today_!?"

I laughed at Alabaster's unabashed fawning as he gazed into the distance with a loopy, dreamy smile. I'm sure there should have been sparkles and bright red hearts floating above his head as he blushed brightly.

Alabaster giggled gleefully, slapping his hands to his cheeks and blushing the brightest shade of red I've seen, "_Princess Peach_!? Princess Peach! Ahahaha! She's so preeeeetty~! And her _smile_! It's like a sea of pearls! A-And she's so delicate! Like a pearl...uh...pearl statuette! _Teeheehee_! Did you know she smells like strawberries!? Like _strawberries_!"

"Well," I smirked, "She'll be here by six am, arriving with Unc."

Alabaster was nearly floating, "I think...I-I'll drop by and say hi. I wish my room would be close to hers..."

I knew good and well that Peach would be arriving with _Mario_, her unofficial boyfriend who she had wrapped around her pretty, dainty fingers, but I didn't want to violently pop Alabaster's love bubble.

Heh. Not yet anyways.

Alabaster picked up my remaining silverware and waltzed out of my door, singing and spinning, "La la la la~! Princess Peach my lady, would you like a dance with me? I'll take you on a ride baby! La la la~!"

With disdain, I rolled my eyes, hopping inelegantly out of bed and heading to my closet. If I was to say good bye to the suitors I'd have to be dressed and presentable soon. I quickly skimmed through my dresses, choosing the plainest of my yellow gowns and heading to the washroom for a quick shower.

When I stepped out, combing the last tangles from my drenched scarlet locks, Lady Angora was in my closet, thumbing through my wardrobe with her usual unimpressed expression; scrunched, twisted red lips and an upturned nose. Her thin, white fingers hovered between two gowns as she finally turned to look at me, "Good Morning Princess."

I fell into a curtsy, "Lady Angora."

She quickly swept her eyes over my form, studying my dress and if it complimented my shape. She nodded to herself in quiet approval, "Nice choice. Very fashion forward and slimming. Your waist looks enviously thin."

"Thank you."

I _think_. She'd never know I was stuffing my face like a pig earlier.

"Your suitors are in the guest suites, please gather them around, I hear your cousin's carriage is nearly here."

I smiled largely, "Peach is almost here!?"

"Yes, and so is the _erm_, 'jovial' Mushroom King," Angora's face remained straight and if she was struggling to do so, she had mastered hiding it well.

She said _jovial_, but she wanted to say _foolish_. Idiotic even. Heh, I _got_ you, Angora.I nodded, "Alright, I'll go and get the suitors, I can't wait to see Peach!"

"Hold."

Lady Angora approached. She stared at me, analyzing my facial features before revealing a creamy pink tube of lipstick. She carefully applied the cosmetic to my lips, brows pinched with concentration and once the task was completed, she pulled away.

The lightest trace of a smile warmed her face, "There. Perfect. Now you may leave. Go and see the suitors and your beauteous cousin."

I curtsied one last time before leaving my bedchambers. I power-walked through the halls, excitement fueling my strides; I'm so _stoked_!

Peach will be here! I'll have someone, a dear friend, sister really I can talk to about all my problems and worries. Someone who will listen to my problems and not judge for weakness or inadequacy, but will serve as a source of strength. She'll offer some older sisterly advice and then probably recommend relaxing with a manicure, facial or some form feminine pampering.

And yet at the same time with gaining Peach, Uncle Apricotto and Mario's company, I would lose the suitors who would be returning to the safety of their kingdoms. In light of the quarrel between Sarasaland and the Aqualands, it seemed as if their kingdoms were neither condemning nor boasting support for Sarasaland. Simple neutrality.

Let's hope things remained neutral. Father had to meet with the Aqualands within two days' time and the kingdoms—ally and neutral alike—were going to be carefully watching Sarasaland with microscopic acuity.

* * *

><p>It wasn't too out of the way to find the suitor's floor. Maids had graciously informed me of Ryu's whereabouts. Apparently the Shinobi Lord was an insane early riser and had been outside meditating in the predawn air; he had actually startled several of the on duty guards when they had walked passed him in the front lawn, mediating in the lotus position.<p>

Ryu had greeted them all politely before closing his eyes and returning to his restoring trance. Zero was in a meeting with the Great Sarasaland Elder Council and Luigi was downstairs happily gorging himself on the castle's bakery.

Fresh pastries were ready to go by four AM every morning, early enough for the Emperor to eat before his first set of meetings each day.

Silver I had passed on his way to the Sandstone library. His face had colored like a rose as he uttered a soft greeting. He murmured about wanting to learn of Sarasaland's famous tea ceremony. I loaned him a relevant book with little problem and told him to return it when he finished.

"Take the book with you, I know it's going to be a long journey back to the Moonstone Kingdom," I smiled, "Just mail it back when you've finished, 'kay?"

Silver appeared distressed and shook his head so fast, his hair and eyes blurred, "I-I possibly couldn't! I don't w-want to impose on Sarasaland..."

"You wouldn't. What's the harm with bringing the book back at a later date? Take it."

His big, bright blue eyes were nearly puppy-like, "Y-You sure?"

"Yes Silv. Friends let friends borrow their stuff. Just be ready to go downstairs soon, it'll be time to leave."

His expression warmed. Silver's faint smile made his eyes seem so much brighter and bluer, "Alright then...I'll...borrow it and bring it back. I promise."

"There ya go, Silv!" As Silver walked away, I slapped his back with amicable companionship.

And nearly sent him crashing to the floor.

Heh _oops_.

"Sorry Silv!" I laughed worriedly.

"I-It's okay!" His face was as red as Mario's cap as he hurried towards the library.

Well, I hope I didn't make_ that_ awkward. Silver disappeared into the library as I continued to retrieve my last suitor. I approached Wolfe's room and his off-key, loud singing filtered into the corridor. The door was cracked open just enough to peer inside.

Wolfe rested comfortably on one knee, scrubbing a sudsy, agitated-looking Puppo in a miniature broggy tub. I laughed, wrapping my knuckles against the doorframe before he replied with a melodic, silly, "Enteeer~!"

I shoved the door open, smiling widely, "Heya Wolfe!"

"Well hey there Bea-u-ti-ful!" he shot a grin from over his shoulder, "Don't mind us, Pup's just getting a well-deserved bath before we head off on the road."

Puppo growled a low, rumbling sound of discontent.

"And he looks absolutely miserable!" I laughed.

"That's because I haven't used the Canine super awesome, super special tonic," Wolfe wagged his eyebrows before procuring a thumb-sized metallic vial. He shook it with little care before carelessly dumping the entire vial all over Puppo's soaked pelt.

As Puppo grew more antsy, squirming and whimpering, Wolfe began to gently massage the creamy concoction into his guardian's blue pelt.

I watched with growing fascination as the apprehensive Chow began to slowly unwind. Puppo's stiff, tense muscles melted like butter. After just a few minutes Puppo's eyes were half-lidded and heavy with relaxation.

"Oh how _cute_!" I cooed, stepping closer, "He looks so chill!"

"The concoction's a family secret and it will work to soothe even the most irate Chows, Broggys, Blitties, horses, anything!" Wolfe continued to scrub Puppo's hide in soothing circles.

His fingernails gently combed and scratched Puppo's skin under his blue coat, "It's our top selling product and it sells faster than hotcakes!"

"He certainly looks like he's enjoying himself," I hummed.

Wolfe peered up with a large, vibrant grin; whenever he smiled it seemed as if his eyes glowed, "Wanna join? He won't fuss anymore. He's basically putty."

"Sure!"

I ignored my expensive chiffon dress touching the wet flooring as Wolfe scooted over. I pulled my gloves off, ignoring my fresh silver manicure and quickly dove into the task.

I cupped a palm full of warm sudsy water and gently streamlined it over Puppo's hide. A second handful of water removed dirt and grime easily and shiny, soft, wet fur followed. Wolfe leaned back on his haunches, smiling with an easy, lazy air as he watched.

"Not afraid to mess up those pretty hands, huh?" Wolfe asked softly. He picked up a towel and mindlessly dried his soapy hands.

"Dirt doesn't bother me. In fact, I feel like dirt brings character."

Wolfe arched a dubious brow, "Character? Uh, what does _dirt_ and _character_ have to do with anything?"

"I think having dirt on your clothes means you've accomplished something for the day, or at least tried to," I grinned, "I'm notorious for returning home dirty. As a child I nearly drove Lady Angora insane. She used to scrub my skin raw, until I glowed pink."

As I continued to scrub and clean Puppo's dark blue pelt, I realized Wolfe was carefully observing me. His expression was soft, relaxed and yet his golden eyes were sharp, alert of every minute move I made.

Despite being carefree and high-spirited, Wolfe was a whole lot sharper and perceptive than others accredited him. Canines had eerily sharp senses and though Wolfe usually downplayed them, every now and then he would say things that clued others into his true insightfulness.

Like yesterday when Wolfe had relayed his story to the elders, he had immediately smelt an odd chemical on Bowser and put two and two together.

In fact, large traces of the chemical Wolfe had smelt were present in Bowser's bloodstream. And here I was, being watched by those intense amber eyes that seemed to glow under the room's light like twin moons.

"So is this what your family business is?" I asked, trying to ignore the weight of his stare, "You have pet care products?"

"Yeah," he smiled softly, "Heh. There's actually a kinda funny story behind it. Originally Ma went on a business trip to Nimbusland to see to some puffy prince's sick broggy."

I arched a brow, "Lady Kitsune's a veterinarian?"

"Eh, not really, but we've raised, bred and taken care of enough Chows to know how to care for them. So Ma got the fluffy prince's broggy healthy and bathed him with our now top-selling shampoo. The King and Queen of Nimbusland were so impressed with how shiny their pooch's fur was. Ma gave 'em the bottle to keep and it spread like a wild craze! People were chasing her down, demanding for the amazing shampoo and suddenly a secret formula my ancestors had been using to spoil their Chows was a worldwide phenomenon!"

Wolfe's smile was electric as he continued in an excited voice, "Things just got crazy when Princess Peach—your pink cousin—endorsed it for her pet blitty, Sprinkles. Then even King Bowser used it for his chomp kennels. It's _amazing_! We've become an empire almost overnight! _Literally!_ We hardly know what to do with all the coins streaming in! We give most of it away to veterinaries and stray broggy and blitty shelters. Homeless, uncared for animals...kinda sad huh?"

So Wolfe had a soft spot for strays? I knew it! He was like a tall, gigantic kid who never grew up. His heart was worn proudly on his sleeve and his true emotions always overflowed in his eyes like a flooded riverbank. It was a good thing.

I smiled, "I like that, your people are still so humble and down to earth."

"Heh yeah, what would we look like being all uppity and snooty?" Wolfe laughed gently, emitting a soft, smooth sound. Yet again I noticed that when Wolfe spoke to me, the rough, scratchy growl left his voice.

"Every Saturday the entire town basically gets drunk; doctors, police and judges included. Of course the judges, nurses and docs have to show more decorum you know. Because of the station of their prestigious jobs."

I smirked, "Oh _really_?"

"Yeah, the doctors only get publicly drunk after eight p.m." Wolfe and I laughed together at that one.

Wolfe went back to carefully scrubbing Puppo's fur. I took a handful of suds and glanced at Wolfe from the corner of my vision.

When his attention was fully engrossed on Puppo, I smoothed the suds against his cheek. He blinked before a raging, wild grin cut across his face like a blade.

The Canine warrior took a handful of water and splashed me across the shoulder. I screeched happily, fumbling and grabbing the nearest bottle. I squirted a goopy glob of purple doggy shampoo into his hair.

Wolfe barked with rancorous laughter and lunged for me, slipping and sliding against the oily surface of the floor. I scored a direct hit to the face this time, quickly shoving a handful of dog shampoo against his nose.

Wolfe cried out, half laughing and growling as I skid across the floor, soaking the hem of my dress with a concoction of shampoo and water, "Stars, you're kicking my _ass_!" his eyes narrowed, "Okay, here comes the Big Bad Wolfe!"

The Canine heir lunged forward and in three surprisingly quick, coordinated strides, Wolfe was on me like a shadow. I shrieked as two large hands gripped my hips and in a dizzying whirl, I was lifted in the air. The expanse of Wolfe's smile could light the darkest alcove as his golden eyes glowed with a wicked sense of victory.

"You're pretty fast, but not faster than a Canine warrior," he laughed softly, "Know what I'm gonna do to you...?"

With the soft coaxing of calloused fingers, I was brought to face level where I was introduced to that wonderfully vibrant smile and a set of white, sharp teeth. Wolfe playfully nuzzled his cheek against mine before planting a surprisingly soft kiss against the side of my face.

"One last one for the road," he muttered softly.

The soft, ticklish lips that once danced upon my cheek leisurely trailed over my mouth. Wolfe adjusted his grip to bolter my entire weight with a single arm. _A single arm_. Impressed, I could feel a blush rising to my face and pulled away long enough to see him shoot a self-satisfied grin my way.

"Can Mister Hotshot Shinobi do _that_?" Wolfe purred in a low register, grinning wickedly, "Can Ryu _'the dragon'_ do—_ACK_!"

Wolfe must have taken a misstep as he suddenly slipped, tilting backwards precariously before falling over completely. His lady-killer persona evaporated like mist as he squealed, tumbling gracelessly into the pet bathtub.

Puppo quickly leapt out of the tub as his ward plummeted with a loud splash, completely drenched. Wolfe took the brunt of the fall, sopping wet as the entire hemline of my dress was soaked through.

Wide-eyed, we shared an incredulous stare before I burst into laughter. I grinned at him wickedly, "And Mister Shinobi certainly can't do _that_!"

Mortified, miffed or maybe even a healthy mixture of both, Wolfe's face flushed several amusing different shades of red. He remained slack-jawed and wordless, as if his brain couldn't believe _that_ had just happened to him.

I laughed at his cute expression before I leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss against his cheek. His eyes doubled in size as I smiled, "You don't need to worry about him. You've got your own magnetic charm that slays."

None of my suitors should have to try to one up each other. No one was going to out electrify Wolfe's glowing, energetic persona.

No suitor would be sweeter than Luigi, no one more caring than Silver, or even as mysterious as Ryu. And no one would certainly be more cunning than Zero or more charismatic than Bowser.

Wolfe was naturally fun and happy and sweet in a rough, off-colored way, and I liked him as is. None of the suitors should try to be like the other guy. Wolfe must have liked what he heard as he grinned sheepishly, the flagrant blush fading several notches, "Heh. Hey Daisy?"

I peered up at him with a grin, "Yeah?"

"Don't forget me, okay?" His tone took on a somber register, "I'll write you, and even call ya if you'd like. We don't have the internet in Land's End so I can't send those...mail _things_. I'll do my best to keep in touch."

"Wolfe, you're too awesome to forget. I'm an awesome penpal and will write you back."

He smiled softer, more sincere, "Alright then. I'll hold you to it. Well I gotta change now that I'm soaked. I can't even imagine your pop's face if I showed up looking like this."

I took that as a subtle cue to get the hell out. I had to change as well; it wouldn't do for the Princess of Sarasaland to appear in court with a ruined dress. Lady Angora would probably violently end me if I tried such a thing.

We walked to the doorframe and Wolfe seemed to be lingering, deliberating over something. He laughed and ran a hand through his long hair, "You know what I was thinking?"

I tilted my head curiously, "What?"

He smirked secretively and tilted his head. His eyes shone a darker shade of gold, "You'd look _really_ good with Canine tattoos on your cheeks."

I blinked, "You think so? I do think they look really cool! Can I have blue and red ones like you?"

Wolfe stopped smiling and stared at me as if I were mental. Then he actually started to laugh boisterously, "_Wha__—_!? Geesh! How did you miss _that_!?"

Still grinning widely, he clutched my shoulders and playfully shook me, "_Daisy_! I was _blatantly_ hitting on you."

I blinked again, "You _were?"_

Someone behind me cleared their throat with well-timed precision, "As much as I _enjoy_ Wolfe's humorous lack of success when it comes to wooing and the princess' questionable romantic acuity, isn't it time we got going?"

The new voice belonged to an amused Ryu, who was leaned against our doorframe. Wolfe glared playfully at Ryu, "Whatever Ry. Just give me a second. I'm not going to say goodbye being all wet and crusty."

Our congregation must have been popular as Zero stopped by, smirking, "That's how you usually look though Wolfe; _wet_ and _crusty_. Emphasis on crusty."

"_Bye_ Ryu. _Bye_ Zero," Wolfe said with intentional curtness and with that he slammed the door on their faces.

Zero held a contemplative gaze, "Hmm, if I knew it was going to be that easy to get rid of Wolfe all long, I would have said those words a _long_ time ago. Princess Sarasaland, do I _even_ want to know why you and Wolfe are soaked?"

"You can ask but I'm not going to tell you," I grinned.

He ignored me, "Once your attire is proper, we can ship the foreign princes out."

Ryu arched a brow, "Happy to see the competition go?"

"_Very_," Zero smirked.

While Zero and Ryu were exchanging congenial banter, I pivoted on my heel and sauntered away, quickly heading for my wardrobe.

* * *

><p>Wolfe walked down the hall, duff bag slung over one shoulder and Puppo perched comfortably on the other. He whistled as he strolled through the luxurious guest suite hallways, drinking in the lavish decor that spoke of royalty and opulence.<p>

"These digs sure are nice," he muttered to himself, "Fancy-smancy chandeliers, brand new carpets and who are all these people in these portraits?"

All the oil painting portraits were carefully arranged in immaculate straight lines. Each frame held the three quarter's view of haughty looking men and women dressed weirdly; they wore really puffy clothes, powdery wigs and poofy pants and dresses. Were these Daisy's ancestors?

One of the black and white photos held a really cute adolescent girl with long ebony hair and a warm smile. Her smile was even contagious enough that it made Wolfe beam while he viewed her image.

_I wonder what she looks like now...If she's even still alive. The entire Sarasaland royal lineage__—__except the cute dark haired girl__—__looked so serious and angry, as if they had a really long, crusty old pole jammed up their ass cr__—_

"Hey Dogboy."

Simultaneously Wolfe and Puppo perked up, "Huh did you hear that Pups?"

Puppo's ears perked :_New voice. Sounded like Big Mean Turtle voice:_

Wolfe scratched his chin, "Hmm you know, it does sound like King B...Well, I gotta get going so_—_"

This time there was an edge of impatience in the mysterious voice, "Dogboy!"

"That voice does sound a lot like King B," Wolfe mused aloud as he scratched his chin, "Y'know...I wonder if_—_"

"Hey _Idiotface_! I'm _talking_ to you here!"

Moments later an irritated, lumbering Koopa king tromped out of his personal suite, glaring down at the Canine heir with no small amount of annoyance.

Wolfe blinked before jovially raising a hand in greeting and jubilantly calling out, "_Heya King B_! You're looking gre_—_hmm, well actually you _don't _look great. Though your bruises are almost unnoticeable. At least you don't look like you got slapped in the face by a bag of bricks anymore. More like slapped _twice_ in the face by a bag of bricks..."

Bowser sighed with rising impatience, pinching the bridge of his snout with his pointer claw and thumb. He could _feel_ the violent urge to punch Wolfe through a wall increasing exponentially, "Dogboy?"

Wolfe beamed, "Yes?"

"Shut the hell up."

Wolfe pouted with exaggerated zest, "Well that's just plain _rude_..."

"Look, try something new for once in your life and shut up," Bowser growled, "What I'm about to say is something I rarely if _ever_ do."

Wolfe snapped his fingers in an exaggerated sort of victorious 'ah-ha' moment and grinned, "_Bathe_!"

"_One more time_," Bowser lowered his head, glaring ominously as he brandished his fist threateningly, "Just say _one _more frickin' funny thing Assmunch, and I squeeze all the pink gooey jelly out of your _head_."

Still unphased, Wolfe laughed lightheartedly, "Okay _fiiiine_. Say what you have to say. I'm listening."

Bowser huffed, before clearing his throat purposefully, "Good. Now that you've stopped having diarrhea of the mouth, I can finally. _Talk._ So, uh, look. I've never got to th_—_uh to t-tha...to thank...you...for..."

The King took a deep breath, and looked away before barely whispering, "...saving my ass..."

Wolfe's impish grin diminished into a true, warmer smile. The Canine heir placed an amicable palm onto the King Koopa's armored shoulder, making sure to avoid the sharp spines, "Hey. It's no biggie King B. You're a great_—_uh, more like not so bad_—_hmm well, you are kind of bad. But not _bad_, bad, you know?"

Bowser kept a blank, hostile stare, "No. I_ don't_ know."

"Well, anyways, you're welcome," with that, Wolfe shoved Bowser's armored shoulder playfully_—_realizing belatedly that _he_ moved back instead of Bowser, "Next time you ought to come to Land's End and we'll have a riot! I've got to jet...so really, stop by sometime and we can hang! Now let's pull it in for a good bye hug_—_"

As Wolfe approached, arms open and inviting, Bowser growled so fiercely that Wolfe instantly pulled away, laughing his ass off, "Alright. No hug then. Take care King B!"

Wolfe waved one last time as he turned and headed down the hall with a happy bounce in his step. The King watched him walk off with half a smirk on his face. He shook his head, muttering with no true venom, "What a toolbox."

With that out of the way, Bowser turned and closed the door to his suite. Hell no was he going to say bye to those losers. They were trying to steal his Flower. They could all kiss his glorious spiked ass.

He received a happy, welcoming babyish Koopaling chirrup, "Up and at 'em already, huh Tyke?"

Kooples babbled happily, squeaking and beginning to play with his brightly colored building blocks. Bowser watched him for a few moments more, "Which reminds me, I'm gonna call room service so we can get some friggin' chow. Two studly, masculine hunks being famished is a crime, ain't that right, Littleshell?"

Kooples squeaked in agreement.

"That's _right_, we're _too_ damn masculine to handle."

Bowser walked gingerly to avoid aggravating any healing wounds. The phone rang in an annoying cadence, causing Kooples to peer up at him.

The king was in such a good mood that he absently picked up the phone, not thinking twice to check the caller I.D as he answered, "It's the King."

_"Ah King Bowser, it's so good to hear your voice."_

And just like _that_ his good mood was obliterated. Bowser silently swore; the Koopa on the other end of the line was not only a Firelands' elder but the head friggin' honcho of them all. Clawdus Koopa.

_Clawdia's father._

Yep. Sometime's the phrase 'oh shit' just didn't cover it.

Clawdua Koopa, who by the way, didn't like Bowser since the day he divorced his beauteous daughter. They butted heads on every type of political issue and on good days they disagreed, whereas on terrible days they were growling and snarling, mere steps away from having a throw down.

It was ironic considering that the twosome were very similar in personality: both Koopas were powerful, both were filthy rich and neither Koopa had a long temper nor the ability to accept any form of insubordination. And most importantly both Koopas were dually feared and respected amongst peers and subordinates alike.

Bowser's voice instantly fell into a cool, emotionless tone, "Governor, what can I trouble you for?"

_"Good morning King Bowser. We of the Firelands wanted to let you know that we wish for our king's swift recovery_," his voice was so genial and smooth that had Bowser not known his true character, he would have believed the sincerity behind the governor's saccharine words, "_As your most loyal subjects, we of the Firelands Council were...confused on a few details and we certainly hoped you would be able to clarify a few things for us."_

"Have you spoken to my advisors?" Bowser grunted.

"_Oh yes of course, Sire_," the other Koopa purred urbanely, "_Advisor Kamek and the other one have remained stubbornly stagnant, refusing to inform their loyal governing council."_

_The other one_. They wouldn't even acknowledge Kammy by name since she was female. Bowser took an inaudible breath, reaching into the deepest recesses of his being to swiftly supplement the haughty, formal diction that was heralded as law within royal court, "If my advisors saw fit to withhold knowledge until my return, in which I would issue a conference to address any and all concerns, then I will not move against their judgment."

_"That is good and well Sire, however the Firelands is very aware that you are being housed within Sarasaland. We do not believe that Sarasaland is responsible nor reliable enough to protect our reigning king. In fact, we question remaining allied to such an unreliable kingdom."_

Bowser was slowly beginning to crush the phone in his large hands as the plastic receiver slowly crumbled with each passing second. By now he was speaking through bared fangs, "I _said _a conference will be held at a later date. What's not clear about that!?"

Clawdia's father continued as if he had never spoken, "_In fact, we think it best for you to evacuate the kingdom immediately and trash the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaty. We would like this action concluded within twenty four hours otherwise__—__"_

"Since when does a governor tell a king what to do?" Bowser growled audibly, "By the way, do you still own that chain of oil refineries in Firestone City?"

_"Of course my king, they are prosperous and business is__—__"_

"_—_then if you were _smart_," Bowser's voice dropped into a frightening snarl, his words starting to harshly mesh into guttural growls, "you and the rest of the Firelands council would drop this issue _now_. Otherwise I'll see your refinery closed so fast your shell will still be spinning. Am I in anyway _unclear_ Clawdus?"

There was a momentary pause on the other side of the line. Bowser smirked, picturing the elder Koopa fuming at being threatened and told off so flagrantly.

It wasn't very often that the highest ranking Firelands councilkoopa got his ass handed to him. But if there was one Koopa who could do it, it was the King of the Darklands who held that power.

"_Of course not Lord Bowser_," Clawdus' voice lost all good humor.

"Good," Bowser hoped Clawdus could hear the grin in his voice, "Don't bother Advisors Kamek _and _Kamelia about the issue anymore. Don't let me hear word that you've brought up the topic again. I've spoken."

"_Yes Lord Bowser_," Clawdus's voice sounded eerily robotic, "_Have a good day, Sire._"

"I will."

"_Enjoy your time in Sarasaland, My King_," Clawdus' monotone suddenly gained a wicked snarl, "_your time with your little pet human princess grows short."_

And before the King could respond, dial tone filled the air. The Firelands just was not going to give this up. They were going to do their damnedest to see the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaty tarnished. Obliterated.

Despite the increased profitable revenues from opening new shops in Sarasaland and the brand new positive public relations the treaty brought the Darklands, the Firelands only wanted to destroy their treaty for reasons Bowser was sure involved Daisy.

It was through the Sarasaland-Darklandian treaty that the Mushroom kingdom set aside its previous reservations. Not even a month after Daisy's_ Summani_, the Mushroom Kingdom viewed the once errant Darklandian king as something close to 'rehabilitated' and began to slowly open trades between their two kingdoms.

Land's End, after the king had direct contact with Chieftain Kitsune_—_and after he soundly kicked the _shit_ out of that fat piranha_—_wasted very little time in talking shop and had plans to establish a few of their pet shops and veterinaries within Darklandian territories.

But no, the Firelands councilors couldn't see all this obvious favor because they viewed his fascination with the Desert princess as disgusting. They saw Daisy as nothing more than a _feosaura._

Just thinking of that awful word infused Bowser with a blistering wave of fury. He slammed the phone, snapping off the receiver in the process. Kooples squealed as the edges of the king's vision blackened, his pulse quickening erratically, throbbing in tempo to his rising ire.

Incisors bared ruthlessly, Bowser clenched his trembling fists, squeezing them together so tightly that his claws were beginning to painfully cut into his scales. Then, within the swirling dark mass of festering hatred and wrath, he heard a voice.

_Calm down. They want you to lose your head. They're playing this foolish game well and you will need to as well. To be upset means you're not thinking straight. If you want to protect the princess then you need your wits. Calm. Down. Regain your edge_.

The voice of reason in his head interestingly enough wasn't his own but belonged to his grandfather; the voice was resonant, smooth and calming. Serous Koopa was one of the few_—_if not _the only__—_Darklandian kings renowned for his famed patience and level head.

The sonorous voice's advise had its desired effect, and with a calming breath, Bowser slowly regained his composure. Though his hands still shook from the rush of anger blazing through his veins, he was back in control.

Fatigue replaced anger as Bowser slipped back onto his bed, massaging his eyes tiredly; it felt like his eyes were scorching beneath his eyelids. _Maybe I'll take a nap...it might do me a little good..._

He peered across the room at Kooples, who was watching him with big, curious eyes. The Koopaling chirruped softly.

"Don't worry, some really mean Koopas were being..."

He didn't want to use the word _asshole _in front of a Koopaling. But when Kooples chirruped back a reply, Bowser laughed, "Yeah, _doodoo_ heads. Exactly Kooples, good word choice."

With very little convincing, the king closed his eyes, trying not to think, to imagine a world where his kingdom was trying to wreck Flower's. He tried not to think of a world where the Darklandian soldiers, emblazoned in fierce ebon armor, descended upon Sarasaland like a poisonous mist.

* * *

><p>By dawn's first light, the Desert sky was entangled within glittering threads of pink, amber and ruby stratosphere. The new day's morning breath was already beginning to become arid and warm, hinting at the blistering forecast to come. A large, magnificent white carriage had passed through inspections and was en route to parking curbside.<p>

Father and I stood outside the palace as the doorman bowed, pulling the carriage's door open. Luigi waited happily at our side, bouncing on the tips of his toes. How cute, he must have been so happy to see big bro!

Out stepped the legendary Super Mario, adjusting his trademark red cap. Mario smiled warmly, turning to the doorman and gently waving him away. The doorman appeared at a loss, before bowing to the renowned hero and relinquishing his station.

Mario fell into his new role easily as he held the door open and bowed. Uncle Apricotto stepped out first, raising a hand to shield himself from the hot sun and moments later Peach's red, heeled stiletto appeared, followed by a sleek, shapely calf chased by lacy petticoats at the edge of the doorstep.

Heads turned, eyebrows of interest were quirked and Mario's expression visibly brightened. This time he took off his cap completely, pouring into an even deeper bow.

Mario chivalrously extended a hand to gently help Peach step down. In one dainty hand, Peach lifted her dress and a slew of lace petticoats, slowly taking each step with as much poise as possible.

It may have been a drawn out process but Princess Peach was gracefully on her feet and I don't think it was missed by either Father or myself how Mario shot one last admiring glance her way before closing the door. In fact, Father even peered in my direction, arching an intrigued eyebrow as I grinned largely.

"It seems _someone_ has a roving eye," Father kept a perfectly straight face as I laughed.

"It seems as if a certain _someone_ has caught a certain hero's eye," I beamed.

Uncle Apricotto drank in the spires of our castle with a silent awe, taking in the myriad of sun dials our ancestors had built and the golden blaze of the desert landscape. Funny enough, Uncle was so absorbed with his sight taking that his eyes grazed right passed us.

Father shook his head as I laughed and it wasn't even seconds when Unc realized we were in fact standing here. He blinked rapidly, finally seeing us. A large grin cut across his face, "_HEY THERE_!"

In his usual inglorious way, Unc raced up stairs and barreled passed several fleets of guards to bulrush us. Father arched a brow with a slight touch of humor and turned towards Toadux, "Who let _him_ in here?"

Toadux barked out laughter as Unc enclosed our position in a whirlwind of fluttering robes and glittering gems, "_Daaaaaisy_!" Uncle Apricotto sing sang happily, arms stretched out and a crazy large grin on his face, "It's so goooood to see you Pumpkin Pie!"

Peach was 'Peachie Pie' and I was fondly dubbed 'Pumpkin Pie'. Unc showed his love overtly with lovey-dovey nicknames and armfuls of hugs, wet kisses and gifts.

"Hi Unc!" I chirruped happily.

He performed his usual greeting, picking me up in a wayward, awkward tangle of limbs and at the same time was acutely aware that I was in a dress and spun me in several quick revolutions before setting me down.

My head always swam afterwards and this time was no different as the axis of my world titled unsteadily. I laughed, staggering and stumbling as Uncle continued to gush.

"Oh you're so _beautiful_ Pumpkin Pie!" Uncle cooed happily, pinching my left cheek, "Just like your mom! I'm starting to think the Stars cloned her! At least you don't look like your dad." He leaned in and 'whispered', "Thank the Stars for small miracles!"

"Unc it's good to see you too!" I laughed.

"Ah so swell!" Then he turned to Father and opened his arms yet again, "And there's my big, serious brother. Come on, pull it in, Sak."

It was barely noticeable when Father arched a brow; to the unsuspecting eye, Uncle's hug would look like a warm, heart-lifting gesture but truthfully it was nothing but well-disguised attack.

The moment Father moved to avoid him, Unc's friendly, bright grin turned wicked as his eyes narrowed, "_C'mere_ big bro. Gimme a _hug._"

Father cut his eyes at Uncle, lips pursed, "I think not."

Uncle's crazy grin only grew more devious, "_Give_ your little brother some _sugar_."

"No."

"I _said_ come here and give me a hug damn it."

Father barely smirked, eyes thinner than fog, "_No_."

Uncle growled, before yelling in a squeaking, breaking voice, "I'm getting you back if it's the last thing I do!"

So for an odd, un-kingly moment, Father ducked and dodged as Uncle Apricotto pursued, lunging and trying to grab his robes to forcibly shove him into a hug.

Peach sighed thickly, pinching the bridge of her nose in building vexation as Mario, Luigi and Toadux watched the brotherly spectacle with no small thread of amusement.

Thank goodness they were doing this _outside_ of the throne room and away from the prying eyes of the council and courtiers. Emperor Sarasaland was to be prestigious and methodical; being chased by his exuberant, spacey brother would certainly damage his image.

After several more wild dives and lunges, Uncle Apricotto was winded, panting and his temple soaked with sweat. Unc hunched over, bejeweled hands clutching his knees as he gasped for air, "Stars, t-twenty years ago I could do this_ all_ day. What h-happened!? Am I getting _old_!?"

"Sire, are you...alright? Is the situation handled or should I call back up?" Toadux sounded as if he'd burst out laughing at the drop of a hat.

Uncle Apricotto took one last, wild dive and narrowly missed grabbing Father's robe. Unc toppled over in a graceless heap, landing flat on his stomach with a resounding _thud_.

Mario quickly pulled his hat over his face so Peach wouldn't see him laughing as Luigi stuck his fist in his mouth, hoping to stifle his laughter.

Things got worse as Uncle began to throw a tantrum, wailing and kicking his legs as he slammed his fists against the floor in a petulant outburst, "_Daaaamn it_! First I'm getting old and now _this!_?"

Father snorted, turning his head away from his wailing, dismayed brother, "It's handled. Hmph. You prank a guy _once _and he's after you. For twenty five _years_."

"_You're giving me a damn hug, Sakky_!" A slightly winded, red-faced Uncle Apricotto bellowed angrily, rising to his feet unsteadily, "And that's_ final_!"

"Father!"

Hands stamped on her hips and her petal pink lips twitched at the corners, Peach hissed, "Father, will you _pleas_e not do this in _public_!?"

"But I _need_ to prank him!" King Toadstool whined, "he got me _good_!"

Father laughed with surprisingly dark jubilance; from what I've heard, Father did get Unc pretty good. Even if it happened twenty-five years ago, the original palace staff _still_ remembered the day when King_—_prince back then_—_Apricotto had three tons of maple syrup, ketchup and the girliest smelling perfume dumped on him.

To this day the staff would burst into fits of laughter as they remembered how it took a month before Unc stopped smelling womanly and with a hint of ketchup.

Father promised me he had only indulged in such 'childish games' because otherwise Uncle wouldn't stop pranking him. Peach gave one last long, pointed look at Unc before he sighed, defeated. Unc turned to Father, glaring angrily.

"This blood feud will _never_ be settled! _Never!_" Uncle Apricotto bellowed, jabbing an angry, vengeful finger at Father, "but one day, one _day_..."

As Uncle Apricotto backed away, he stopped at the castle door and pointed 'menacingly', walking backwards into the palace so he wouldn't break eye contact with his older brother. Amused, Father smirked as Peach looked thoroughly embarrassed, "My apologies Uncle. Father is...well, _you know_."

"Do not apologize for your father's oddities_—_and quite possible_—_mental defects. Now then," a soft smile came to Father's lips, "I believe a certain beautiful young lady owes her Uncle a hug...?"

Peach blushed at the unexpected compliment and quickly hugged Father. When the emperor peered in the Italian hero's direction, Mario crisply removed his hat in a respectful fashion and eased into a fluid bow. Father returned his gesture with a nod before facing his niece yet again.

I turned to Peach and in one move, we both darted forward, leaping into each other's arms, laughing as Mario and Luigi initiated some sort of brotherly secret handshake.

A flood of Peach's strawberry perfume and the aromatic warmth of her golden hair settled over me as pleasantly as the warmth of a Sarasalandian summer.

After holding her in a tight embrace for several moments, she pulled away, smiling tenderly, "We're going to have a nice relaxing spa day. Just the two of us. It'll be us, the beauticians and the Chocolands cocoa clay mud mask."

"Then we can have a big ole family dinner!" Uncle Apricotto suddenly rejoined the group hug, startling everyone out of their wits.

Unc nuzzled both of our faces with silly affectionate gusto as Father shook his head. And in true Unc Apri fashion, he had totally forgotten about pranking his older brother and had moved onto the newest, most interesting topic on hand.

Mario stared at Unc blankly, "Weren't you-a inside the castle already?"

Unc titled his head like a confused puppy, "Was I? Oh yeah I _was_ but I got bored and came to see what you guys were up to!"

"But before supper," Father stepped beside us, placing a hand on each of our shoulders, "We shall be courteous guests and see the princes off. Come, let's step inside. The others are already waiting."

"We'll have to see Grammy," Peach murmured, "I have to see for myself that she's doing well."

Uncle Apricotto's face fell, "My dear, sweet _mother_! The woman who gave me _life! _By the blinking, bloody, flaming Stars, I need to see if she's okay! I'm going right _now_. I'm going to march right up those stairs and see her_—_"

Unc pivoted on his heel, ready to make good on his promise but Father was quicker. His hand leapt out and firmly held the scruff of Unc's pelt robe.

"She is fine," Father murmured comfortingly, quickly releasing Unc the moment he seemed rational, "She is resting comfortably. After we send off the royals, you can go and see her. She'd be delighted to see her granddaughter and even an errant son. Now come. Let's sojourn to the throne room."

"Sojourn," Uncle Apricotto mocked, wiggling his brows, "Whenever Sakky's around, you're gonna get those stuffy puffy ten thousand coin words!"

Mario and Luigi laughed but the second Father directed a pointed stare their way, both brothers quickly hid their laughs with coughs or the classic throat clear tactic.

I myself employed this tactic. The moment we entered the throne room, the soft mist of idle chatter evaporated, spines were tediously straightened and the heads of servants bowed.

I spied Alabaster in the corner of my vision, grinning dumbly at the sight of Peach's tall, elegant figure. He sighed happily, dreamily clapping his hands together as the heavens opened and sang upon him. Then he did an obvious double-take at the sight of Mario stepping beside her.

Bitter envy flamed Alabaster's tan skin a boiling burgundy as hellfire blazed in his eyes. Amused, I arched an eyebrow; I'd have to talk to him and make sure he didn't do anything stupid, like challenge Mario to a duel and get his ass soundly kicked.

Protectorate Salini approached, bowing deeply, "King Apricotto, Princess Toadstool, Sarasaland is delighted to have your company, though we wish it was for a more jubilant occasion."

Peach curtsied as Uncle Apricotto nodded, "Thanks. It's always good to be in Sarasaland. It's a little hot for my tastes though. It's good to see you!"

Uncle Apricotto fondly slapped Salini's shoulder with uncouth amicability. The High Protectorate blinked slowly, unsure how to even respond to such an abrupt gesture. He must have decided it was best to simply say nothing and go as he slowly turned, retaking his place at the head of the councilors.

The line of suitors approached, each bowing correspondingly to the presence of both Mushroom monarchs. I was surprised when Zero broke out from the ranks and stepped forward. He bowed to Uncle and faced Peach.

For a change his eyes were bright and very aware, "Princess Toadstool, you look as lovely as ever."

Peach curtsied, smiling coyly, "Thanks you, Sire."

My jaw nearly hit the floor when Zero, who _never_ bothered with any type of courtly , chivalrous etiquette, took her hand and pressed a kiss against her delicate palm. Mario said nothing but arched a brow that vanished under the lid of his cap.

A couple of the suitors appeared bewildered; Wolfe arched a mischievous brow as Silver blinked rapidly. The gears and wheels in my head clicked and whirled as I realized with a sudden start that Zero _liked_ her. And almost as if prove my conjecture, Zero's rare warmth cooled when he gave Mario a curt, disinterested nod.

He gave one last smile_—_yes _smile__—_at Peach before stepping back into line with the other suitors. As the other suitors were busy chatting and welcoming Mario, I stared at Zero with incredulous wonder.

He smirked, "Is something the matter Princess Sarasaland?"

"You like Peach?" I spoke more so to myself than to him.

"If your brain worked every now and then," he snorted, "you would have realized this years ago."

I turned forward, a surprised grin dawning across my face. So the serious, sarcastic councilor liked my soft, pretty cousin? Realistically, he had to know that they would make an awful pair.

Peach had the biggest, purest heart, often giving obscene amounts of coins to orphanages and pet shelters, whereas Zero could be effortlessly callous and cold.

I was beginning to think that in life, we humans chased the things that seemed 'forbidden' the things and people that normally went against everything we stood for.

I half laughed and half scoffed, "You _realize_ she's happily in a relationship, or whatever it is she has going on with Mario right? _Mario._ The legendary hero?"

Wolfe was excitedly shaking Mario's hand with far too much enthusiasm_—_to the point that Mario's wrist was starting to discolor into an ugly bluish-purple_—_Ryu and Silver eventually pried him off the mustached hero.

"Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo~!" Wolfe sang, "_It's-a Mario time_!"

"...That's quite enough Wolfe," Ryu tried to speak to him quietly, "You're _scaring _him now."

Zero's muted smirk remained as he continued to carefully observe Peach, Mario and the suitors, "_Of course_ I'm aware of it. Don't be ridiculous."

"So then you know that you've got_, _heh, _zero chance_ with her, right?" I struggled to keep a straight face.

"You're right," Zero hummed, then his smile took on a slight sinister twist. He peered at me from the corner of his eyes, "Just like King Bowser has _zero chance_ with you. At least in _my_ situation we're the same race, species."

I froze, confused, "What? What does _that_ have to do with anything?"

"Just an observation," he was still grinning.

I frowned, puckering my lips; what did Bowser have anything to do with his attraction to Peach? I certainly didn't need Zero to inform me that Bowser and I were a different race.

Species? Not too sure about that one. But even then, he and I were friends and had an established relationship, and as far as I know, I don't think Peach knows Zero exists.

Wolfe shot past the once ceremonious rank of foreign princes and towards Mario again, "Hey! It's Super Mario! I'm his biggest fan!"

Ryu and Silver peered at him with varying levels of amusement and confusion. The councilors arched brows.

"It takes some of us awhile to catch on I see," Zero muttered none too softly under his breath.

Silver smiled lightly, "W-Wolfe...we were just in the M-Mushroom kingdom just a few days ago..."

"Yeah but this is different! He's here!" Wolfe gushed happily, "I want to see the man jump!"

Ryu stepped forward to probably explain an obvious oversight Wolfe was neglecting, but Zero stopped him, "Don't. Don't do it. It'll just be a waste of breath."

Before Wolfe could bulrush Mario, and demand to see some heroic feats of strength, or, jumps in this case, I stepped towards the line of foreign princes.

"I think it might be time," I spoke softly.

Wolfe's excited aura darkened as smiles disappeared and brows furrowed. We knew this day was coming, though sooner than we all had expected. Already their rides homebound awaited them.

Guards had informed Father that moments ago an elegant Moonstonian Carriage arrived curbside, and Sage's unmistakable form stood outside of the palace walls. Father materialized before the suitors and spoke.

"Let it be known that Sarasaland has thoroughly enjoyed your company," Father's sonorous voice echoed throughout the throne room, "though we wish we could send you off on better terms, this departure is better thought of as a 'see you later' than a firm farewell. Let us not fear this departure but merely expect a happy reunion." Father finished with a formal bow, a gesture all the suitors returned.

Father cleared his throat pointedly and peered at me from over his shoulder, "Princess Sarasaland, if you will?"

"Of course Father." That was my cue to give a brief farewell to each of the suitors. I stepped before their half circle, smiling at each prince with true mirth.

"Well," I smiled sadly, "Looks like I have to let you guys go, huh?"

Silver, Ryu and Wolfe remained silent, varying degrees of reluctance on their faces. Wolfe, who had never been afraid to communicate what he felt, looked the most torn, "Yeah, still not too happy about this piranha shi_—_uh _crap_. Yeah, I _meant_ crap."

Father arched an eyebrow at the obvious self-editing as Uncle laughed. None of the three suitors made a move to say good bye first.

Amused, Zero raised an eyebrow, "My, has the Princess of Sarasaland bewitched you all so much so that you hesitate to leave her side?"

A soft rumble of laughter came from the nearby councilors. Wolfe smirked slyly and when he 'coughed' he nudged Silver forward with a wayward elbow.

Silver blinked, casting a suspicious glance back at Wolfe who was busy pretending to study his nails. Then the Moonstonian prince let out a defeated sigh, smiling sadly before approaching me, "I-I guess this is good b-bye for now Princess Daisy..."

And since my guards, his sentinels and an entire brigade of Sarasalandian councilors and court ladies were watching, I barely whispered loud enough for him to hear me, "Oh Silver...no need for sad goodbyes."

"Daisy," he breathed just as softly, "I'll r-really miss y-you..."

"You have my cell, right?"

Of course he did, since I gave it to him. I only asked just to see his reaction, and I wasn't disappointed. I grinned at the obvious rouge his face suddenly took on, "Uh y-y-y-yeah I d-d-do. I p-promise I'll keep in t-touch."

He quickly leaned in as I wrapped my arms around his torso. I clenched him tightly, feeling the beat of his heart seep through the material of his clothing as I breathed in the subtle spice of his cologne. After holding him for a few seconds, we pulled away, smiling.

The true, sweet warmth was effortlessly replaced with staid court formalities; we were in Sarasalandian court with a myriad of eyes closely watching our every move.

Not to mention my Father was standing a few steps behind me, keenly watching every single action with cool, discerning eyes.

Silver turned to Father and bowed respectfully, "T-Thank you for sharing y-your beautiful kingdom E-Emperor Sakuro."

Father returned the bow, "You are most welcome, Prince Moonstone. Sarasaland wishes to see you in the future."

Then Silver turned to me and bowed to the waist, "I p-promise to write you, Princess Sarasaland."

And since I was being carefully monitored by the severe stares of the councilors, I dropped into a feminine curtsy, speaking with my airiest, sweetest voice, "I'm charmed. And if you desire, I'll write you too Prince Moonstone, if that is what his majesty wishes."

Silver nodded, face perfectly neutral as was proper of a chivalrous prince; too much anticipation and eagerness pointed to immaturity and a covetousness prince, "I look forward to it."

For a glimmer of a second, a real smile flickered across Silver's features; his blue eyes warmed like a summer sky and within the next blink, I saw his cape fluttering around his ankles as he turned to leave.

Silver went over to the suitors, shaking hands and exchanging a few last words, though when it came time to bid Wolfe farewell, the Canine heir beamed widely before crushing Silver into a painful-looking hug.

Silver peered back one last time, smiling sadly before stepping out the door.

_Bye Silver..._

Moonstonian servants slipped in wordlessly, bowing before quickly, and silently hefting the prince's luggage out the doors. The next person I _felt_ more than saw.

One moment he had been standing beside Wolfe and in a soundless blur of movement he was standing behind me. Only one person could move _that _quickly and silently.

And smell that _gooood_.

I smiled, turning to face Ryu, whose expression was perfectly straight. We both exchanged a stiff, formal bow, "It was great to have your company Lord Ryu. I hope I will see you soon."

"As do I Princess Sarasaland."

He took my hand and pressed a chaste kiss against my palm, an act that was fairly modest within the court's eyes. As he pulled away, I realized he had discreetly slipped a piece of paper into my hand.

I peered at the paper then back at him, stunned. For a split second we locked stares and Ryu pulled off such a subtle wink that I thought I had imagined things. Heat rose to my cheeks as I tried to discreetly hide the note that felt as if it were burning within my hands.

Peach cleared her throat audibly; everyone _else_ may have missed that exchange but _she_ had to let me _know_ she hadn't. As Ryu walked towards the door, a servant was grunting with strain, trying to pick up the Shinobi leader's heavy bundle of knapsacks.

And with thoughtless ease, Ryu swooped in, picking up the heavy load with one arm before turning and walking out the door. A couple of brows were raised at Ryu's thoughtless show of strength and Wolfe openly laughed.

In the corner of my vision, Peach quirked an almost unnoticeable eyebrow and very slyly sent a hooded, suggestive look my way. I flushed three different shades of red before looking away.

A horse's shrill whinny rose in the air. I approached the door to see Ryu atop a muscular ebony stallion. He gave one last salute and a dazzling smile before beginning his trek home.

_Bye Ryu..._

Wolfe stepped beside me, nothing but smiles as he motioned me to follow him out the door. Peach smiled, nodding her head in approval. I stepped out to the court where Sage was waiting. The arid air was going to be sweltering hot in a matter of hours, I could feel it.

Sage's ears flickered in my direction before he peered at me. As I approached, his thick tail wagged. I smiled, "_Sage!_ Hey there! How are you boy!? Huh? Are we doing well?"

I rubbed the large Chow behind his pointed, vulpine ears. Sage growled contently, affectionately nudging the side of my shoulder with his snout.

I continued to stroke his cobalt pelt as Wolfe approached, "So it looks like I've got to hit the road. I just wanted to be out of your castle so everyone wouldn't watch us. It's soooo _creepy_."

I laughed softly, "Sorry, that's how court life is, everything and everyone watching the emperor's daughter."

"Well now that I have you alone," Wolfe's voice dropped several octaves. When I peered up, his eyes seemed darker, a shade bordering honey, "You take care, alright Daisy?"

His hand went to my shoulder and squeezed affectionately. I clasped his large, warm hand within mine, "I will. You take care too, you and Puppo _and_ Sage!"

Puppo yipped happily, leaning in and licking my cheek with a slobbery wet kiss. I laughed, wiping my damp cheek with the sleeve of my dress.

I froze as a pair of soft lips adeptly replaced Puppo's kiss. Wolfe pulled away, golden eyes bright and a brilliant smile crossed his visage, "See ya around D."

I was always puzzled by his kisses; how did someone with such a wild, rough demeanor have such soft lips? I knew my face was redder than my hair when I spoke, "I'll see you later Wolfe. You and that amazing smile."

He laughed, hopping onto Sage's back in one quick, practiced motion. One moment Wolfe peered down at me from atop his mount, smile warm and melting eyes bright and then the next he was ready to go.

Wolfe left out a sharp, piercing whistle and Sage was racing down the steps and tearing across the Desert sand, devouring the terrain in galloping strides. As the last of Wolfe's figure disappeared from sight, he let out a final howl that rang through the air.

_Bye Wolfe..._

A part of my being sank; I had really grown close to them over these past few days. I would miss Silver's quiet demeanor, the weight of Ryu's pretty blue eyes and nothing would replace the infectious buoyancy of Wolfe's laughter. I have high hopes that they will return and that this dilemma with the Aqualands wouldn't hinder any of our newly blooming friendships.

I felt a presence linger by my side. Father's white robes were unmistakable and bright as a warm wind toyed playfully with the material of his clothing, "Let's come inside _Chisana_. Your Uncle and cousin have both left to check on your grandmother."

"Okay," I replied softly.

I stared at the glowing horizon, ignoring the irritating burn of staring against a rising sun. Once I was sure the last traces of my suitors where gone, I followed Father inside the palace. It wasn't long before Protectorate Salini approached Father, whisking him away to talk of business.

The servants resumed their tasks, mopping floors, dusting furniture and polishing windows. Alabaster was scowling, viciously scrubbing the tiles of a hallway floor.

I approached him and made sure to speak in a soft voice, "Hey...Is everything okay? You seem a _little_ upset."

"_Upset!_?" His voice broke, "Did you see _that!?_ That...That mustached...jerk..._face_! He had his hands all over _my_ princess!"

"Holding someone's hand counts as having their hands 'all over someone?'" I was smirking, trying to rile him up even further.

"I'm going to find him," Alabaster hissed, scrubbing the floor with too much attention; if I didn't know any better, I'd think he was imaging scrubbing the skin clear off of Mario's face, "and kick his butt!"

"That's going to be hard to do," I was still trying not to laugh, "considering Mario's punches can knock King Bowser out."

"Yeah well that's not too impress_—_"

"Knock out _Bowser_." I reiterated my point, grinning, "The mean, nasty, gigantic Koopa King with bulky muscles and stunning red eyes."

Alabaster's head jumped up, as he stopped his chore, "Wait, what!? _What _did you say about _King Bowser_!?"

_Stunning red eyes._ I flushed, realizing my mistake; I just said he had stunning eyes. I said that aloud. Alabaster blinked up at me skeptically as I quickly tried to play it off, "Uh nothing. I s-said that his blows could knock out K-King Bowser."

"Peh. Mario _must_ inject himself with 'shroom steroids or something. "'Roids' as they're called on the _streets_," Alabaster hissed under his breath, "I mean let's be real here. Why do you think he's so short!? You only get that way if you take_—_"

"Alabaster," Now I was laughing, "You're a _Toad._ You're even shorter than he is."

I stopped on the dime when a shadow slipped over my shoulder. Zero appeared, suddenly standing over Alabaster with a dark look on his face. Alabaster gasped, quickly bowing in repentance, "M-My Lord Zero, I'm sorry if I've ups_—_"

"One hundred coins are yours," Zero even brandished the bag to drive his point home, "if you set Mario's room up _next_ to King Bowser. An extra one hundred if you're quick about it."

My jaw dropped; what in the world!? Bowser and Mario would _kill_ each other! Why would Zero want_—_oh. _Ohhhh._ There's no way we're going to have two titans duking it out in my castle. I was going to stop this before things got_—_

"_Done_!" Alabaster's features morphed into a wicked, hellacious grin. Then he bowed, still grinning brutally, "_Milord_."

Zero smirked, "Ah. I absolutely _love_ how _diligent_ the servants of this palace are."

"Alabaster don't you do it!" I growled, "Don't you_—!"_

But he shot out of there faster than a Bullet Bill on a starman drug trip. Alabaster quickly raced up the stairs cackling_—_probably to find Mario and lead him to his demise. Zero tossed one last grin at me before whistling, calmly heading to his study, as if he hadn't just planned a heinous plot.

Oh Stars. What the _hell _was going on here? I just hope Mario and Bowser don't end up fighting again. They've supposedly 'patched things up.' I'm going to go and find Peach.

A servant stopped me, "Princess...Want in on the betting pool?"

"Sure, what is it involving this time?" Hell, I had coins to spare, why not?

The old maid grinned, "Two to one odds that Princess Peach talks Bowser out of a fight. Five to one odds Mario beats Bowser in a fight..."

"Huh, and what else?"

"Ten to one coin odds that Mario wins _and _punches Bowser through a wall. Twenty to one odds that however Bowser is defeated, it's _hilarious_ and going on Koopatube."

I've seen the impressive Mario versus Bowser archive on Koopatube and I've _yet _to not laugh at each clip. From Bowser falling into lava and burning his ass, to him being blown sky high out of a cannon and cursing as he disappeared in the distance.

If you had a sucky day, _watch_ Bowser on Koopatube. It'll have you laughing your ass off just like _that. _I tapped my chin in thought, "Hmm...Put five down on the ten to one odds."

"Got it Princess."

_Sorry Bowwy. I don't think you'll lose...Well, okay I do, but as long as you don't know about the bet, no one gets their feelings hurt, right? _

* * *

><p>Alabaster bowed low enough to hide the obvious scorn on his face, "<em>Sire<em>, welcome to the Sarasaland palace, we hope that your stay is marvelous. This is your suite, Sire _Mario_. Please let me know if there is any way to assist you."

Mario peered at the large double doors with a touch of wonder. As he admired the well furnished decor, he missed the poisonous glare Alabaster aimed at him.

The moment Mario turned to look at the diminutive servant, Alabaster's expression was professionally blank yet again, "Thank you very much-a! Here."

Mario graciously shook the Toad's hand and as he did so, discreetly slipped a generous tip within Alabaster's tiny fingers. Alabaster bowed before turning to walk off, "Please let me know if I can further assist you, Sire."

As Mario slid the keycard into the door, Alabaster walked away merrily. Once he was sure Mario couldn't see him, he shot one last wicked grin at the red hero before leaving the hall.

"_Hehehe_...I hope you have a _killer _stay," Alabaster muttered under his breath, "Our suites are to _die _for."

The locks clicked and Mario opened his door to admire the beauteous furnishings, "Mama mia, these are some-a pricey digs. This is nicer-a than a hotel!"

He took a few seconds longer to admire the beautiful scenery before stepping in and pulling the door closed behind him. Just as his door shut, the neighboring door popped open as King Bowser stepped out, stretching his sore, healing frame, "Kooples is out like a lamp. Think I'll take a minute t_—_?"

A new scent grabbed the king's attention the way the length of Flower's legs did. He sniffed loudly, peering around with an inquisitive, puzzled expression, "_Ugh. _Something smells like cheap-ass hair gel, five coin cologne and leather...If I didn't _know_ any better, that smells just like..."

Bowser paused thoughtfully, before dismissing the all too familiar scent, "_Nah_. Can't be."

He stretched out one last time before lumbering down the hallway, thudding with each heavy step he took. A young servant bowed, "King Bowser. His majesty, Emperor Sakuro would like to cordially extend an invitation to dinner."

"Dinner? Where will it be held?"

The maid offered an invitation written in beautiful cursive, "In the dinning commons Sire, tonight at seven p.m. I shall attend the Koopaling in your quarters then."

"One last question, will Princess Sarasaland be there?"

"Of course Sire, her, the king of the Mushroom kingdom and Princess Peach shall all be present."

He didn't hear any words after the _Princess of Sarasaland_ was mentioned. Bowser smirked, "Count me in. I'll be there. Before you go, could you spot me a favor."

The maid blinked, before fixing her face into a professional, serene visage, "Of course, Lord Bowser."

"Could you watch Kooples for me for a sec? I've got to make an important phone call."

"Of course, Sire."

The attentive servant quickly swept into his room not even moments later. Bowser stepped out and aimlessly wandered the length of the hall until he made it to an open balcony. The king reached into the front of his shell and pulled out a sleek, sexy, expensive cell. Only three of these had been ever manufactured and he had _one. _

He quickly dialed a number and by three rings, it was promptly answered, "_H-Hello!? King Dad? King Dad! I-Is it you!?"_

Bowser turned away, in case anyone walking by saw him smile, "Hey Brat. Yeah, it's your old Koopa."

"_K-King Dad_!" Junior sounded as if he were about to cry, "_I-I thought you were sick! M-Miss Kammy said you were too sick to talk to us! M-Mama Daisy said she'd watch over you."_

"Did she now?" Bowser smirked, "You know Scamp, I'd be _totally_ okay with her giving me a physical..."

"_A what? A Fizzy what?"_

Bowser laughed, "Nevermind Scamp. Look, get your brothers and Sister...But it's important that you...guys listen to me, okay. No one, and I mean _no one_ can know how I'm doing or they'll make me leave Mama Daisy."

_"No! Stay with Mama! Stay with Mama Daisy and marry her!"_

"That's the plan, Kiddo. Now go get your siblings. Daddy's got a lot of explaining to do."

* * *

><p>"And from the top..."<p>

With sunset's glimmer, bright sunbeams dappled the pagoda in sparkling tendrils at music practice. The sharp, sour, off key notes of harps, lyres, and other wind instruments twanged inharmoniously in the air.

Lady Angora twitched as another unflattering note was savagely botched by her many young students. One final, awful note tried the last thread of Angora's waning impatience. Enough was _enough_.

With an inaudible growl, Angora impatiently cut the baton across the air, almost like a physical jab, "That's _quite_ enough. We've been practicing for an hour and a half yet no more progress has been made. Councilor Sandstone will be visiting in a week's time and I've promised him a breathtaking performance from several beautiful court ladies. And yet this is sounding nowhere even close to _mediocre_."

Emitting a sigh deep enough to drop her shoulders, Lady Angora harrumphed, "Fine. This will do for today but come tomorrow I expect to hear a significant improvement from each of you. This is enough."

And it was. Angora quietly shook her head, cerise lips tightly pressed together in silent disapproval as she pondered the astounding incompetence of the new generation.

As the young ladies of the court packed their instruments, laughing and giggling with bursting gaiety, they had already forgotten their responsibilities and were blathering about boys, parties, and the most fashion forward accessories.

By half of their collective age, Angora had been gifted enough to masterfully play three different string instruments and yet these girls struggled pitifully with _one_. This also didn't include her masteries of the piano, flute and though she would never speak of it. The harmonica.

Everyone had their own guilty pleasure, and playing the inelegant, crude, slapstick harmonica was hers. And she would rather be seen in last year's outdated fashion before she _ever_ admitted that to anyone.

The young court ladies, daughter of Sarasalandian elites, nobles and counts were nothing but spoiled, pampered things that had no true interest in bettering themselves. They simply planned on living off of their parents' wealth and dreamed of marrying wealthy, handsome men.

Youth was a temporary stunning elixir, as was beauty. Beauty, though a powerful potion very few women could utilize, was a commodity that would fade faster than vapor.

Angora of all people was quite familiar with the stunning combination of youth and beauty; once prized as one of the most beautiful women in Sarasaland, wealthy men of all kingdoms and countries fought each other, _begging_ her father for her hand in marriage.

She had had so much attention, so many rare, exquisite gifts brought on her behest and so many open stares of admiration from men and baleful glares of envy from women.

And now in the wink of an eye, two decades had flown by and her once heavily sought after hand was only a distant memory. This wasn't to say that Lady Angora couldn't have her pick of men, it just wasn't as ridiculous as it used to be in her youth.

She was still beautiful; hair more ebony than the darkest raven's wing, lips tempting and wickedly apple-red and skin pale like the moon but she no longer had the power of youth of her side. And yet here these girls were, squandering their youth, their beauty, their talents.

_All hope is not lost. At least Princess Sarasaland will one day rule. A true beckon of strength and character, one who won't aimlessly flaunt her beauty to achieve what she wants..._

Lady Angora was so preoccupied in the veil of her own thoughts that she didn't notice the approaching newcomer, though he was a behemoth in both statue and musculature, "Excuse me..."

The deep, masculine baritone had all the court ladies piquing up with interest as they spun around, bright-eyed and brows raised. Then in one similar motion they all froze; for standing in the arch of the doorway, and nearly engulfing the entire doorframe was King Bowser.

The Sarasalandian ladies gawped stupidly; Angora was the only one who had the presence of mind not to gape like a breathless cheep-cheep.

The young court ladies peered amongst each other with curious fervor. Was this _really_ King Bowser? The awful demon king that nearly plundered the galaxy and stole the holy Star Rod from the _Stars_ themselves!?

Maids and servants in the palace had passed on rumors that the awful king had been badly beaten, near death even and the Koopa staring back at them was tall, strong, and worse than anything they could imagine. Nothing about him seemed sickly or remotely weak.

Seeing King Bowser through the television and through the print of newspaper was far different than seeing him in person.

He was absolutely massive; his tall frame teemed with muscle, there were monstrously large_—_and sharp_—_spikes on his shell and he was covered in icky, thick golden scales like a reptile. And his red eyes were demonic and wild and like nothing they'd ever seen before.

His presence stirred up a swirl of uneasy emotions amongst the court ladies; most of them nervous, others disgusted and a tiny sprinkle of them felt curious about the new creature.

"_That thing spoke_," One younger court lady replied in Sarasalandian.

"_Stars, it's ugly,"_ a second girl hissed, fuchsia lips pulled into a sneer.

Bowser flicked a quick look in their direction before he turned to Angora expectantly. He recognized her scent of lilacs and some kind of cosmetic cream, a scent that belonged to Flower's mentor.

In the back of his mind, he mentally added her amongst the hottie elite ranks of Kitsune and Rose and into the 'attractive older woman' or the MILF category.

"I'm supposed to meet with the Emperor for dinner. Where's_—_can you...tell me where to go?"

He was met with silence, even Angora, who was usually composed and assured stared at the Koopa King with unabashed wonder, but not for the same reasons as her younger counterparts. She realized King Bowser, who was fabled for his profane and blunt words was proactively _trying_ to speak politely.

_My, how very interesting_._ Is the sudden change of heart brought from his fondness of Princess Sarasaland? _The edges of her cerise lips curled into a subtle smile. Before Angora could speak, the young court women began to blather loudly in Sarasalandian.

"_Take a left at the corridor then take a right, can't miss it you big idiot_."

A chorus of cruel, saccharine giggles rose amongst the girls. For a split second, Bowser's expression became blank and a second court lady must have been encouraged by the laughter and spoke up next, "_What's wrong? Can't understand us, eh Brute?"_

_"What an ugly, big monster."_

_"He has scales! Ugh! My Stars how horrible! He's like a reptile!"_

"_What the hell is Princess Daisy thinking making him a suitor for marriage!?"_

"_Not even she deserves something ugly like that."_

Bowser's expression quickly stonewalled. The court ladies kept chattering and laughing in Sarasalandian and it didn't take a genius to know they were insulting him.

The King shot them one burning, lingering glare that quieted their laughter and made the hair on the back of their necks raise before he turned and began to leave, stomping away loudly.

"Wait."

Bowser shot an impatient glare over his shoulder and caught the slim figure of Angora in his sight. Her expression lightened fractionally, "Travel the length of the corridor and take a left, followed by a right and you shall come to the dinning commons. Have safe travels, Milord."

Bowser peered at her and Angora thought it could have been a trick of the light, but his expression appeared less severe. Maybe he recognized the muted kindness in her words? The King nodded stiffly before turning and stomping down the hall.

"Lady Angora, you didn't have to help him," A young, blond court lady spat, "_He's _the reason Prince Taurus hates our kingdom and refuses to give us water."

"She's right. Aqualandians hate Koopas, and now because of him, Prince Taurus hates _us_. You should let him get lost. Hmph. Let him suffer."

Angora's expression darkened, and she purposefully turned to face them all with an ominous delay, "Witless child. You'd be _wise_ to speak to him with respect. All of you. He is the king of the most powerful nation. And even though we're allies, we are teetering on a thin, _thin_ line between friend and foe and yet here you are insulting him. Perhaps if you weren't busy filling your heads with empty ideas you'd have room to think for a change."

"Lady LeCatte, he's not even an ally!"

"He's a _Koopa!_ The other kingdoms laugh at us because we align ourselves with those beasts."

"With those ugly lizards."

"_Enough_," though Angora barely whispered the command, her tone held enough gravity that the others immediately fell silent. The court ladies bowed submissively in one single movement, "Yes Lady Angora. Please forgive us."

"The apology would be best ushered to the king, but do not forget your manners," and with an impatient flick of her hand, Angora turned her head so she didn't have to look upon them, "See yourselves out. I want you all here before dawn tomorrow for practice."

"But practice doesn't begin until noon!" One court lady whined.

"Stars, I _hate_ waking up early!"

Angora's eyes were thinner than a blade, "Then perhaps you ought to consider it your punishment for such reviling behavior. Now go. And may you pray to the Stars if any of you show up half a second late. Dismissed."

The court ladies bowed, scattering quietly as they collected their things and left the room. A couple of the braver girls peered back at Angora once or twice before leaving.

Angora shook her head; and to think, one day they're going to be involved with Sarasaland's diplomatic affairs. _Such thoughts give me a headache. I'm going to drink. Drink booze and then play the harmonica like a commoner._

With that out of the way, Angora swiftly spun on her heel and marched to her quarters.

* * *

><p>Bowser stepped into the furnished dinning commons where the two royal families had been waiting. The king glanced around, taking in the over-abused color palette of starburst golds, vibrant oranges and a calming, placating cream to wrangle the bright, overpowering colors together.<p>

The orange and yellow color scheme was ridiculous, it was everywhere; in the carpets, drapery, wall paper and even the decorative blossoms, fragrant and sweet_—_nauseating and sickly sweet if you asked the king_—_were yellow and orange.

At his arrival, Peach and Flower, who had been having an animated conversation, halted, rose from their seats and curtsied. Bowser smirked coolly, allowing his eyes to rove over the Desert princess' put on delicate demeanor.

Apricotto beamed widely, his entire set of teeth revealed as Sakuro watched coolly. It wasn't very long when Apricotto rushed over, beaming widely, "Bowz my Koopa! Ya came just in time!"

"Erm...Father...?" Peach shook her head in a not-so-subtle warning, "Why don't we leave King Bowser to himself, yes?"

The Darklandian King cut a devious glare at the approaching, empty-headed man. As Apricotto tried to wrap an amicable arm around Bowser's back, he let out a tiny yelp as he pricked his arm on one of the king's large spines. Bowser couldn't hide his grin if he tried.

"AHHH! MY ARM!" The Mushroom King bellowed childishly, tears welling up in his enlarged eyes.

Peach sighed, rubbing her temples as Flower tried not to laugh, "Unc, you got to watch out, Bo_—_uh_—__King Bowser_ has dangerous spines."

Dinner hadn't started yet and Peach's patience already looked as if it was running dangerously thin, "Father _please _be more cognizant of your actions."

"I am Peachie Pie! But Stars did that _hurt_," Apricotto whined, bottom lip puckered like a kicked Chow puppy. Daisy took her Uncle's arm and kindly led him to his seat beside her father, quietly making sure he wasn't too hurt.

For just a second, Bowser thought he caught Sakuro smirking deviously at his brother's whimpering, but it must have been a trick of the light because moments later the emperor's mien was perfectly composed.

Sakuro made a motion towards the seats, "Now that all guests are accounted and present. Let us all dine."

While everyone moved to their seats, Bowser honed in on the empty chair beside Princess Sarasaland. That empty, open spot beside the pretty princess beckoned to him and without a second thought, he bound for that spot. Bowser thoughtlessly rushed passed Peach and claimed the free seat.

Of course the king's overeager actions drew _everyone's_ attention like bees to honey_—_and a particularly cutting, severe glance radiated from Sakuro.

Bowser realized his screw up a second too late as his cheeks glowed a mortifying red. Apricotto grinned knowingly, eyebrows raised as he was keen on studying his brother's expression and Peach appeared softly amused.

"Uh...? My bad," the king grumbled.

With all eyes on him, Bowser could feel his embarrassment skyrocketing, increasing with all the heat and discomfort of a fever. He purposefully cleared his throat and took a step to the left so Peach could take her rightful spot beside Daisy. Peach smiled before quickly schooling her features into her usual, serene visage.

Sakuro stared at Bowser scrupulously; eyes narrowed and critical before Apricotto nudged him, coaxing his older brother into a seat. Everyone took their seats in a single fluid motion and that was the signal for the servants to begin their service.

It wasn't too soon when the once empty, expensive porcelain was filled with Sarasaland's signature wild pheasant, baked geese, spiced wild rice, stewed onion, garlic steak, and roasted honey apples for a light, sweet dessert.

The tantalizing scents saturated the air like a fine perfume and the sight of fat dripping off the plump pheasant made an animalistic hunger twist violently in the King's stomach.

Bowser watched with mounting impatience as the servants made a frickin' _ceremony_ of setting the damn plates, dishes and arranging their meals in a pretty, pleasing arrangement. Peach cooed happily as a servant created a heart with her sliced honey apples.

A chef was diligently making a fireflower design on each of their plates with a sauce they were supposed to eat. _What the hell was this!?_ What kind of etiquette was _this!?_ You put food down in front of someone and then _bounced_. What was this other piranha shit about!?

As plates were filled, and dishes were passed around, Bowser had had just about enough of waiting. In his kingdom he was served first and ate first. Slow servants could rightfully have their asses _torched_ for delivering his meal too slow. Slowing down a Koopa from eating was as _evil _as slapping a newborn blitty.

Bowser elbowed a servant out of the way and began to inhale his food with bloodthirsty Koopa zeal, managing to impressively shovel two apples, and three fat pheasant drumsticks into his mouth in a single gluttonous motion.

"GWHAHAHA!" Bowser ripped into more tender pheasant meat, his eyes rolled into the back of his head from gluttonous pleasure, "_Ohhhh Stars_, it's like having _sex_ _in your_ _mouth_!"

Bowser laughed happily as the taste, scent and spice of food, _real_ food filled his mouth and gave his taste buds a crazy, rockin' _mouthgasm_. The table fell silent as Bowser realized he was suddenly the center of attention.

_Again_.

Peach and Apricotto were gaping_—_though Apricotto looked more amused than anything_—_as Sakuro stared intensely, eyes narrowed and critical of his terrible manners.

Only Flower remained unperturbed, happily chewing some of the stewed onion. Bowser swallowed everything in one loud, disgusting gulp and just when he didn't think things could get worse, he fought back against the evil, massive-ass belch that was trying to violently make itself present.

Bowser cursed none too quietly_—_warranting _another_ dirty look from Sakuro_—_as he wrapped a fist against his chest, trying anything to keep from ripping a _wet and nasty_ at the table. Flower peered up across the table, locking eyes. She looked as if she wanted to die laughing.

_Screw her. Screw her and her cute face and those big pretty eyes and that cute mouth. Screw her. Especially those long legs. I'd take alllll night looooong to screw..._

The weight of Flower's stare only abolished whatever remaining threads of composure Bowser had as he flushed dark red. Daisy smirked at him mischievously and that only served to fluster the king that much _more_.

_I'd kiss that cute smirk off her face..._

Sakuro caught their friendly eye-tag and narrowed his eyes, mouth clenching into a firmer unpleasant line; that stare alone could drop the temperature several degrees.

_Oh friggin' Stars, don't burp, don't burp, pleeease don't let this damn burp come up. I'm crushing my lungs trying to keep this thing down_.

"King Bowser...is anything okay?" Peach asked, truly concerned with his odd_—__weird__—_behavior.

"Uh yeah, just fine," he murmured, then threw in an extra, delayed, "thanks."

Peach smiled warmly before returning to her meal. Once Bowser was sure he beat the gas monster down, he bashfully picked up a _Star damn too small_ fork and began to jab at his food, hoping he wouldn't starve because teeny, sissy-wissy human utensils did not work for masculine, strong Koopa hands.

Someone coughed and Bowser peered up, realizing it was Daisy who was still smiling and holding in her laughter. Everything must have been okay again because the others picked up their utensils and began to eat quietly.

Apricotto happily complimented the food, staff and tried to squeeze embarrassing tales out of the staff about his older brother. The servants either didn't know anything or were too smart to say anything unflattering of their emperor.

Bowser didn't contribute much to the conversation, simply content to stuff his face and avoid saying anything that Sakuro could use against him. He was content to watch Flower as she laughed and smiled truly. Her smile and true mirth softened his hard stare as he watched her.

The Darklandian King was so caught up observing Daisy that he didn't realize that both Peach _and_ the Emperor were all _too _aware of his eyes being glued to their Dessert Princess.

Sakuro's lip twitched as he quickly peered at his plate and began to cut his steak with a_ little_ more zeal than necessary. He cleared his throat loudly, "King Bowser, is everything to your liking?"

Bowser nearly jumped before looking at the Emperor, "Huh? Oh yeah...yeah...everything's fine. The pheasant is good, real good."

"It must have been," Sakuro peered up at him and smirked with no small raze of mischief, "With the way you were shoveling it down I thought there was a time limit on your meal."

Bowser squinted, "..._Whuh_?"

Apricotto and Daisy laughed as Bowser realized quickly that he had just been _publically_ _burned _by the staid Emperor Sakuro. As the table laughed, Sakuro contently took a long draw from his wine glass.

_Why, that crotchety-ass Emperor_. This he would _not_ let go, or his name wasn't King 'lady-slaying' Bowser. Bowser curled his fist, and hid it under the table so it wouldn't _accidentally_ _fly across_ the room and knock the emperor out.

_It's okay Bowser...just calm down...don't go across the room and punch him through any walls...Just think nice, nasty thoughts. Flower in a bikini. Boom. Feeling better already..._

Bowser chuckled with unusual urbane refinement, eyes narrowed, "Oh ho ho! That was _quite _funny, _Emperor_. But you know, if I had hair as long as _yours_, I'd eat slowly too. It must take forever to condition, lather and blow dry your _manly_ hair into straight, silky smooth perfection."

And then there was silence. All heads shot up at the table, eating utensils halted in midair as the Emperor stopped drinking from his wine goblet. Then Apricotto burst out into laughter as Daisy snorted, covering her mouth to hold back her laughter.

Sakuro frowned so deeply that Bowser thought he'd permanently etch lines into his face. Apricotto continued to wail happily, tears dotting the corner of his eyes as Peach tried to hide her laughter behind dainty palms.

"Don't dish it if ya can't take it bro!" Apricotto added before dissolving into another heap of foolish laughter.

As Flower giggled, Bowser took the opportunity to grin, rewarded yet again with her dazzling smile and the sound of her laughter. Sakuro cleared his throat, eyes cut extraordinarily thin.

"It seems you have something on your mind?" Sakuro turned, peering at the King with a scrutiny that could frost grass, "Princess Sarasaland is indeed beautiful but you _stare_ as if you've _never _seen her before in your life."

Peach's mirthful giggles were airy and sweet and it was more than enough to bring another light flush of color to the king's cheeks, "Oh, uh...w-well..."

Flower blinked, peering up at him, mouth popped open in surprise as Bowser continued to stammer ungainly, "I-It's just been _awhile_ since I've last seen her..."

_And yeah she is effing gorgeous. I couldn't stop looking at her if I tried._

Bowser peered around the table and when he met the bright, big blue eyes of Princess Sarasaland, she smiled, an attractive flush of ruby glowing on her cheeks. The King smirked, forgetting yet again that her father was at the head of the table, watching him closely.

"Heh, Sakuro," The Crazy Shroom King spoke lightly, "Remember when our girls were little and I wanted to lock Peachie Pie away so she wouldn't have to date any boys?"

Bowser was highly amused when the prim and proper Princess Peach rolled her eyes with no small amount of disdain, "Dad, don't you think that's over the top? Just a _little_?"

The Crazy Shroom king smirked, "Not at all dear! You just don't know how boys act! Someday we_—_your stuffy old Uncle and I_—_will find you a nice Prince to marry."

At this, the Darklandian king didn't miss the subtle glance both Flower and Peach shared. Flower raised her brows with a sly grin as Peach blushed; Bowser would bet _coins_ it had something to do with that tacky red plumber.

"But until then," Apricotto continued on cluelessly, "no dating until you're thirty."

Sakuro chuckled softly, "For a time, I was thinking of sending _Chisana_ to live in the monastery and become a nun."

Peach grinned as Flower shot a funny, exasperated look at her father.

"Thank the Stars you _didn't,_" Bowser laughed, "Thank the Stars that you..."

Bowser slowly let the sentence die away awkwardly as all eyes were suddenly upon him. Jaws were dropped, eyebrows raised and some people_—_like Apricotto_—_looked as if they wanted to laugh their asses off.

Heck, The Mushroom King was peering between Bowser and his brother, his head on a wild swivel just so he wouldn't miss either of their reactions. Bowser's face grew pale, "Uh...Crap... I-I meant...uh..."

The table fell silent as Sakuro, eyes narrowing, growled fiercely through his teeth, "..._Excuse_ me?"

Bowser, whose jaw hung inelegantly, grew ashen before flushing all too obliviously with a luminous ruby blush. Apricotto bust up laughing raucously, nearly turning the soup in his mouth into an unwanted projectile, "Haha! Just want a chance at my pretty niece _eh!?_ The Koopa's _right_! What a _shame _it would have been! She's just as lovely as her mother!"

Daisy gaped wordlessly, cheeks blazing carnation pink as Peach's visage was stuck between surprise and lucid amusement. With twinkling eyes, Peach shot a rather quick_—_sly_—_glance in Bowser's direction before sipping her soup with a soundless decor.

Sakuro peered up with a frosty glare that had Bowser realizing _exactly _what his statement implied. He was _glad_ Flower wasn't a nun because that meant she _could_ have _sex_. And obviously he wanted to have _sex _with _her_.

_SHIT._

_Oh shitty shitty bang bang._

As Apricotto and Peach laughed in loud spurts of riotous peals, Sakuro was still glaring daggers from the head of the table. The Emperor's jaw was tightly clenched as his fingers were impatiently crushing, cracking hair-thin fissures into his glass goblet.

The Emperor was always a man that effortlessly held a blank face, and for one of the few times, Bowser had _really _managed to piss him off. For a split second, Bowser wondered if he'd be thrown out of Sarasaland.

The others weren't unaware of the sweltering death aura Sakuro was exuding in suffocating black waves as Apricotto, while laughing jubilantly, slipped an easy arm around his older brother's shoulder, "Aw _Lighten up_ Sakky! He was _joking._ It was a joke."

"It's_ not_ one that I find much humor in at all."

Peach cleared her throat, "King Bowser if you don't mind, why don't you tell us about your children?"

Bowser realized with a start that Peach had not only set the conversation back into non-inflammatory territory but she also started a topic that couldn't go wrong. All parties at the table loved children. Even Sakuro's conceited ass.

His children were a topic that he never struggled to speak about, "As you all know, I've got eight Koopalings. Ludwig, where do I even start with that kid? He's absolutely brilliant. He could play the piano before he could walk. Even as a baby he hummed songs and learned how to write lullabies for his little siblings."

Sakuro nodded, "Ludwig's music is some of the most beautiful, complicated symphonies I've had the pleasure of hearing. It's absolutely breathtaking and he's so young and talented."

Peach smiled, "His performance at the _Summani_ was stunning!"

"Then there's Roy. He's tough and abrasive and he can come off as selfish," Bowser frowned, peering into the reflection of his glass chalice, "He reminds me of myself...of how I..."

All heads popped up, peering at the Darklandian king with far more interest. Bowser's eyes thinned to red slits, "...used to be."

Sakuro arched a brow and peered at him keenly from the other side of the table, "Hmm. Aren't you the same now? Kidnapping, fighting, stealing, the list of your misdeeds are quite lengthy."

Flower's brows furrowed, lips twisting at their edges as both she and Princess Peach_—_surprisingly_—_disagreed. Flower even appeared slightly upset at her father's characterization, "Father, King Bowser is...he's a really good Koopa now. He doesn't do any of the bad things he used to. I wouldn't be friends with someone who was."

"I agree," Peach's soft, sweet voice was melodic.

Bowser chuckled with no true humor, "No Emp. I'm not nearly like I used to be. When..." he halted, mentally deciding if he even wanted to share such vulnerable material with the monarchs of Sarasaland and the Mushroom kingdom.

He peered up and saw Flower's consenting smile. That seemed to give him the final nudge he needed, "As a Koopaling I used to be...angry and..." he halted, taking an inaudible breath in through his nostrils, making sure to focus his stare everywhere but at the watchful eyes in the room, "I...ever since my grandfather passed, I had been angry and bitter. Violence seemed like the only outlet I had. In fact fighting and blood, it was all encouraged."

Bowser closed his eyes as swirls of his chaotic Koopalinghood flashed across his memory. All the blood he had shed as he trained under a grueling tyrant.

Friends he had lost and a mother he barely knew because Morton thought companionship would make him 'soft.' The pain of having to endure torture under a father who saw mercy, kindness as weakness. Morton had valued cruelty, ruthlessness in his heir and did his best to sire it.

There were many nights still painfully fresh and raw in his memory, nights he had cried himself to sleep as a Koopaling. He had been curled up on his side pathetically with snot running down his face, wounds throbbing from his father's 'training'. During the day, under his father's cold, unforgiving eyes, there was no room for the crown prince to cry.

There was very thin leeway for sentiment and if those emotions didn't involve fury, contempt and/or arrogance, it was not tolerated. Shedding tears was held to the highest degree of contempt and was absolutely disgusting in King Morton's book. Tears always led to more brutal beatings.

"Grandmother was friends with King Bowser's grandfather," Flower's voice dragged Bowser from his abyss. It struck him how dark and somber her usually bright eyes were, "Grammy told us how King Morton actually banished her from the Darklands because he hated humans. He burned houses and schools...I can't even imagine being his child..."

"Wow..." Peach's voice sounded truly sympathetic.

When Bowser peered up, with vestiges of his blossoming anger crinkling his brow, he was surprised at all the empathy received. The Mushroom monarchs looked cheerless, blue eyes dim and dark with concern. Even Sakuro's stern, severe visage had softened several steps.

"King Morton's cruelty was legendary," surprisingly it was King Apricotto who had been so insightful. His voice was barely loud enough to float across the table, "I read about the horrors he put his own troops through to make them tough. A good number of them _died _from his insane training methods. I can't even imagine what life with him was like."

Bowser unconsciously scratched at an old, puckered scar on his elbow. A gift given from his father when he had thought his young son to have been becoming, 'too soft'.

"I..." The unusual rattle in Sakuro's deep voice made Bowser peer at him, "never had the chance to ever interact with King Morton. He never had any interest with Sarasaland and tended to ignore smaller kingdoms. Or those ran by Humans. I knew he was ruthless when it came to politics but I never expected him to carry out such ruthlessness upon his own child."

Was Sakuro, _stick-up-his-ass_ Sakuro showing his own brand of empathy? This was too much. Bowser shifted uncomfortably, clearing his throat with purpose, "Yeah well...As much as I _enjoy_ talking about this..."

Flower smiled at him, blue eyes shimmering and sparkling like sapphire, "What about your other Koopalings?"

Bowser certainly didn't look a gift horse in the mouth. "Morton. Named after his grandfather ironically is _nothing_ like him," Bowser chuckled, smirking at the thought of his son, "He's so mellow, and gentle. But Stars is that Koopaling strong. And big. He's a teen and he's nearly as big and as strong as I am. He'll be stronger than his old man in no time flat."

Flower laughed, "Morton's so cute! He really is a 'gentle giant.' He speaks so properly and he loves playing with children, and he absolutely hates violence."

"How intriguing..." Peach hummed.

"The twins, Stars they drive me up the wall. Lemmy and Larry are each other's shadows. One follows or the other leads. And they switch."

"You know," Peach spoke, tapping a gloved finger against her cheek in thought, "How can you tell the twins apart? They look so alike!"

"Lemmy has greenish eyes and Larry's eyes seem bluish," Flower piped up.

"Fl_—__Princess Daisy_ is right," Bowser shot a smirk at Flower, "Also each Koopaling has small differences. Lemmy's left cheek has a permanent dimple and Larry still has a scar on the side of his neck where he frickin' shot a bullet bill in his _own _face."

"You'd never know it but Lemmy, the twin with the green eyes, is actually is brilliant. He has a stellar IQ and is nearly as smart as Ludwig."

"Lemmy?" Flower asked skeptically, laughing as she did so, "_Lemmy _Koopa!?"

"Yes actually," Bowser smirked, "In fact, most of their pranks have some kind of scientific method behind it. They once made stink bombs to flush out a meeting and Lemmy understood that sulfur bonds release a noxious, gassy smell or something. Lemmy actually knows he's light years smarter than his twin, but pretends to be _stupid_ so Larry won't feel bad. Larry on the other hand is far more charismatic and good with people. Larry is good with words and usually does the explaining as Lemmy is usually the brain behind their pranks. _Stars help us all_."

"Wendy, she's my little Koopette. Stars she's going to be absolutely gorgeous when she's grown," Bowser sighed wistfully, "She's going to be a heartbreaker just like her mom. I'm overprotective but it's because she's my little sweetshell."

"'Sweetshell'?" Peach asked, arching an interested eyebrow.

"Darklandian term of endearment," Flower piped in, smiling brightly, "It's like our 'sweetheart.'"

"_Oooh_," Peach cooed, bobbing her head, "I see! 'Sweetshell' huh? I like it! It's so cute!"

Bowser continued, "She loves fashion, glitter, gems, sparkles, and beautiful things, and the second some stupid punk kid breaks her heart, I'll break his _neck_."

Sakuro actually smirked, "It seems we are both very protective of our little jewels."

With that, Sakuro smirked, arching a rakish brow as he looked in his daughter's direction. Bowser was gifted with yet another opportunity to see Flower blush.

The king smirked, "Can't blame you really, your little jewel dazzles and stuns. But then again Emperor, you can't really blame all the..."He grinned deviously, "_interested buyers_ out there who want your gem. Who _wouldn't _want something that special?"

Peach's eyes glittered with mirth, Apricotto beamed widely, peering at his brother as Sakuro's eyes narrowed a touch, "_Huh_."

Bowser stared at Flower just long enough for her face to flume a remarkable shade of ruby, "So anyways, there's Iggy who's quiet, shy and he's a really good cook. He watches all these cooking shows and learns how to cook, just like _that_. He's not much of a fighter but I'll make a little beast out of him yet."

"Then there's Junior," the King didn't realize he was smiling, "He's my little clone; he's got the world's largest personality and a smile brighter than twelve suns combined. He loves painting and art and thinks he some kind assassin."

The emperor chuckled, "I must second you on Bowser Junior's wondrous artistic abilities. When he was here in Sarasaland, he drew a picture for me. Do you know what he drew?"

Bowser groaned with fake disdain, "Hopefully something _appropriate_."

"I think so," the Emperor hummed quietly, "It was of his 'family.' He drew his brothers, sister, Father, Mother...Grandparents..."

Bowser grunted, "_Mother?_ He doesn't even _know _Clawdia."

Sakuro cleared his throat, "Not to be facetious King Bowser, but his mother _isn't _the woman you're imagining. Anyway, I'm quite fond of Bowser Junior. His personality can light a cave."

"Yeah," Bowser smirked, "Everything I do, he wants to do."

"It's so cute," Flower laughed, "Junior really idolizes King Bowser. Sometimes he even dresses like him."

Sakuro arched a brow at his daughter, "My, _Chisana_. You certainly hold a _great_ deal of knowledge about Darklandian culture _and _of King Bowser's children."

Flower flushed all the way to the roots of her hair, "W-Well...I-I'm just _really_ close to them Father."

"You have to be," Sakuro smoothly drank from his chalice, eyes locked on his daughter, "if they refer to you as '_Mama'_."

_Two-hit combo!_ Daisy's complexion only seemed to flush redder and redder each passing second, "Y-Yeah, well...uh..."

"Daisy is a delegate that visits the Darklands, of course she would be knowledgeable of Darklandian culture. She works closely with their father so it's not surprising that she's close to them." Peach winked at her Uncle before turning to Bowser, "And Since Bowser Junior emulates you it's all the more imperative that you be a good role model, don't you think?" Peach asked, smiling sweetly.

"Yeah sure," Bowser grunted with no true conviction.

"It's obvious that your children are your passion," Sakuro spoke. When he peered at the king, he no longer held a hostile expression, "Perhaps a man_—_or in your case_—_a _Koopa_ has many facets to his personality. I respect a Koopa who cares deeply for his children."

Bowser smirked, nodding, "Same goes for you, Emperor."

Emperor Sakuro nodded kindly as Flower smiled; it was obvious she was happy to see the two of them finally starting to get along. They may not have been holding hands singing Koopa kumbaya yet, but this was definite progress.

Almost as if he were thinking along the same line of thought, the emperor gestured, "I've had a delicacy prepared for you King Bowser, and we of Sarasaland hope you shall enjoy it."

Realizing that this was some sort of lowkey peace offering, he accepted quickly, "Sure, what are we having now?"

With a motion from the Emperor, the servants reentered the dinning commons, carrying several silver trays to the table. A small, fist-sized ball of something sat on a decorative porcelain plate.

Bowser quickly picked up the cutesy roll, studied it with a subtle sniff before biting into it gingerly. It was some kind of roll_—_ crafted to look like a red and white spotted mushroom of all things.

It was wrapped in fresh, cooked briny seaweed and a vivid combination of salty and savory flavor danced on his tonsils delightfully.

The cold protein wrapped within the seaweed was one he couldn't place, but it was well-seasoned and delicious, "Hmm. This isn't that bad, what is this?"

"I'm glad you're enjoying our treat," Sakuro answered crisply, helping himself to a second roll, "We've had the sushi exported, fresh from Seaside town. It lies directly next to Sea, renowned for its fresh, flavorful squid and seafood. It was quite costly as shipping fresh fish seems pricey, though it was worth the hassle."

Bowser's face grew pale as his brows shot to his hairline. His jaw dropped as he quickly dropped half of the eaten sushi roll from his claws, left eye twitching erratically, "_Sushi?_ Did you just say sushi? Sushi as in _fish_? As in uncooked _dead _fish?"

Apricotto blinked, "Yeah, that's what it is. Why, is something wrong?"

"Uh no," Bowser laughed nervously as perspiration began to pour down his face, "There's nothing wrong at _all_."

"Are you sure?" Flower asked skeptically, brows furrowed with worry, "You're sweating. Like buckets of sweat."

"What? D-Don't worry about me," Bowser continued to laugh edgily, as his left eye began to develop a noticeable tick, "It's not like Sushi makes me_ violently_ ill or anything. Or that the thought of eating _nasty, gooey, disgusting_, _dead_, _smelly_ fish makes me want to _hurl_. It's nothing like that at _all._"

"_Oh dear_..." Peach whispered, pressing her hand against her mouth, concern dawning on her features.

Sakuro arched a brow as Daisy appeared really worried, "King Bowser? Is everything...?"

Bowser suddenly shot up, making all the glassware on the table jump and even the seats at the table hopped, "You know what? Hold that thought. I uh, gotta...Go. _Now_."

And with that he charged out of the dinning commons, knocking aside servants, bowling over maids to make a mad charge out of the dining room. The monarchs stared after him in wordless awe.

"I hope he's not _too_ ill..." Peach whispered.

Apricotto spun around to face them all with a large grin, "Is anyone thinking what _I'm_ thinking!?"

"I certainly hope _not_," Sakuro intoned blankly, "cause then there'd be _another_ insane person."

Daisy was concerned, halfway out of her seat, "That King Bowser is_—_"

"We've _got_ to invite that Koopa to more dinners!" Apricotto boomed happily, "He makes everything so much _fun!_"

* * *

><p>It had been hours since the servants cleaned the last traces of tonight's dinner. I honestly can't say if tonight's supper had been a success or a failure. Father had been viciously keen on 'roasting' Bowser, Uncle<em>—<em>well, was _himself__—_and Peach once again fell into her usual, effortless role of playing peacemaker and making sure no one was strangled at the dinner table.

Just to make sure we didn't have any bitter feelings between us, I decided to bring Bowser a late evening snack. I made my way to his guest suite, careful to balance the tea pot and saucers. I wrapped on his door, "Bowser, it's me, can I come in?"

A low rumbling chuckle replied, "Do you even have to ask? It's unlocked _Purga_."

I pulled the handles open and walked in. Bowser was relaxed on his bed, grinning at me. He smirked, motioning my approach. I gently placed the tray on the bed, pouring him a cup of piping hot tea before gently sitting down, "It's honey meringue tea. The kind_—_"

"_—s_erved at our tea party," Bowser grinned, "I remember it."

"How is your stomach feeling?"

"_Fine."_ Bowser glared at the tea cup. Though he looked pissed, I noticed the underlying blush in his face.

"Where's Kooples?" I peered around the room, "I wanted to read him a bedtime story."

"Lil' guy's being watched by the nannies, but I'm pretty sure he's asleep anyways. Apparently your staff has a hard time letting him go. That Koopa charm _slays _the ladies."

"Oh alright. So uh, I'm not sure what to say, but uh, sorry for Dad...I don't know why he gets so...defensive around you?"

"When one alpha male scents another alpha encroaching on his territory," Bowser spoke with a straight face, "shit's gonna go _down_."

I half laughed, "Are you _serious_? Is _that _what you think!?"

Bowser smirked, "You wouldn't understand the _delicacies_ of _masculine etiquette_. One guy is always going to try and establish himself as the alpha."

...Excuse me, but did he just say 'masculine etiquette'?

Isn't that an oxymoron!?

Well that's _not_ weird at all. Apparently tonight there was tension from two, overly beefed up egos and yet I thought maybe they just didn't get along because they were direct opposites of each other. I definitely didn't think it was because of _masculine etiquette_.

Bowser picked up the tea kettle and peered at me, "Want some tea? Make a plight now before I kill it..."

I raised a placating hand, "Nah, I'm good. Kill it."

With a shrug he opened his mouth and poured the tea down his throat, swallowing it all in three massive_—_and disgusting_—_gulps. I laughed, shaking my head, "What an idiot..."

I released a sigh, peering around the guest room suite which was lavished with golden-gilded mirrors, luxurious, plush furniture and modern decor.

With a second deep sigh, I peered at the ceiling, studying the intricate patterns above; the suitors had left and it feels as if everything had slowed down. Yet the only ones here with me, with Sarasalandian in her greatest hour of need are my closest friends.

_Peach...Mario...Luigi..._

_And Bowser?_

He was injured and I'm sure if he was recovered then he would have left with the other suitors. Bowser may have been my friend, but the constrictions of kingship would have forced him into choosing what was best for his kingdom, even if that meant leaving me. No hard feelings, kingdoms and citizens come first.

_And yet..._

Even now he had promised to aid Sarasaland in a great time of need. Offering to provide water for a Desert kingdom was no small token.

I smiled at the thought of my friend's overt generosity; Bowser did have obligations to his kingdom, but time and time again he always managed to demonstrate how vital our friendship was.

_Speaking of the devil..._

I surreptitiously snuck a glance down at Bowser; what did he think of all this? He clearly wouldn't be happy with the Aqualands. Taurus had shown himself as volatile and hostile, irresponsibly injuring several royals who had nothing to do with the strife involving Sarasaland.

You know, I've been so busy that as of late we really haven't had much time to talk like we used to. We would talk about subjects both significant and immaterial.

Like what did he think of the other suitors? What would the Darklands' role in all of this be? And did he miss the Koopalings? But...What did he think of...me?

Bowser may have been a king, but he was an _unmarried_ king and most monarchies were quite traditionalistic when it came to marriage; things just seemed to look better when a king was married, had a queen and children.

It was an unwritten rule how kingdoms held married rulers in higher esteem than those who were single and unattached. So surely the Darklands will want their king to remarry and find a bride...

My cheeks flushed hotly as I quickly glanced away; _is_ there anyone Bowser wants to marry? He swears up and down he doesn't have a thing for Peachy anymore, but Lazinne's fortune telling is proof that there _is_ someone he's had his eye on.

Was she a Koopette? Everytime we've gone through his kingdom, hundreds of beautiful, young Koopettes have openly stated their admiration and interest in him.

Bowser finding a queen would not be difficult. In fact I'm positive that for Bowser finding a young, beautiful queen would be as easy as clicking his heels.

I peered down at him from the corner of my vision; surely he's thought of his Koopalings needing a mother...And with how_—_well_—__amorous_ he was, I'd be surprised that he hasn't considered marriage as well.

As I continued to peer at the relaxed king, the right side of his mouth curled into a lopsided smirk, "And now, you're going to tell me what you are thinking. Been starin' for some time now."

My jaw dropped; _what the hell!?_ How did he KNOW I was staring at him!? I was so stunned, I couldn't form a coherent reply. While grinning, Bowser cut his eyes in direction, smug as sin. Damn it why do I do this to myself!? _SHEYT._

"Uh...erm..." I could feel my body betraying me as I flushed several different shades of red. It must have been too obvious as Bowser' sly grin grew larger.

"I'm _waaaaiting_..." he growled with a grin.

"D-Do you really want to know...?" I coughed, I fake coughed again to stall for time, "To...?"

"Quit stalling Flower and tell me."

_Damn!_

"Are..." I swallowed thickly, purposefully looking away from him, "Uh...I was just thinking that all my suitors a-are human and y-you're a K-Koopa...and..."

"Uh huh..." He actually sat up, eyes bright and grin large enough to stretch across his face, "_Continue_..."

"So I guess I w-w-was wondering i-if..." I swallowed thickly, purposefully looking away from him, "d-do you find...you know, Human girls a-attractive...? Cause clearly y-you openly state how much you love 'curvy Koopettes' and I w-was wondering...If you find...humans attractive..."

My voice died away in a hushed whisper as the increasing stretch of silence only spread my anxieties to higher peaks. Though I wasn't looking at him directly, I noticed the moment Bowser's easy, relaxed posture tensed.

He turned to peer at me and I could _feel_ the intensity of his stare; though curious, I wasn't brave enough to meet his gaze. And though I didn't look at him, my words suddenly inspired something _different_ about him. It was something in the air, a shift of energy.

"And what..." Bowser's voice dropped several octaves until he was purring, voice smooth and silky and dripping with something utterly masculine, "would make you _think_ I wouldn't appreciate the smooth legs, shinning hair and the soft skin of the female human species?"

There was a satiny, smoldering ambiance behind his statement that made me flush red. I hurriedly thrust my hands through my hair, hoping to shield my face from his intense, rich red stare, which was now all but honed in on me, "I...I was just curious is all. I know, totally weird question, I know."

Again I could feel him proactively studying my expression, trying to discern my body language and understand the unspoken question in my statement.

I swallowed thickly, feeling _stupid _for even asking such an inquiry. My query had just opened _hundreds _of different floodgates and most, if not all of them implied I was trying to see if he would be interested in my species. Or a particular _person_ within my species.

"Why do you ask?" his voice was surprisingly soft, and fell into a deeper timber than before. He rose from the bed and moved closer. Closer until he was standing directly in front of me.

I wasn't bold enough to look him in the eye but I did see his plastron's yellow and the coiled muscles in his upper arm, "You think I don't...I _wouldn't_ like human girls?"

"I was just curious okay?" I spat, blushing furiously, and wringing my hands together, "Y-You know, I just thought that...y-you're _single_ and a king and y-you have _Koopalings._.."

I finally peered up and his expression was incomprehensible. I halted, only realizing that I was digging myself into an even bigger hole, and that the longer I rambled on, the more intense Bowser's expression became. This would be easier if I simply shut the hell up.

And that's what I planned to do. Face blistering red, I continued to garble and stumble over my words stupidly, "Y-You know what? L-Let's just forget that I even ask_—_"

My breath hitched unsteadily when a smooth, cool claw gently swept under my chin. My head was titled upward until I was peering eye to eye with the king. I stared into his irises, faintly admiring the vivid rubicund clash of liquid rubies and garnets. My mouth had gone dry as his expression grew softer, melting, "In case you're too frickin' dense. I'm _very_ attracted."

I froze, mouth dropping as the wheels turned in my head; to Human girls? Or to...? Bowser pulled back to gauge my mien, his expression brimming with amusement. Then he released a sigh, rolling his eyes with great disdain and shaking his head. He smirked, "Flower?"

"Y-Yeah?" I uttered, peering at him deeply.

"_This_ is what you get for being so damn dense."

His eyes narrowed as a slow, predatory smile spread across his snout. He stuck his smallest claw into his mouth and...

...Gave me a gnarly _wet willy_. I felt the nasty, wet squelch of saliva press against my inner ear as I screamed bloody murder. Bowser roared with laughter and immediately I pounced on him, red-faced, fuming and spitting sordid Sarasalandian curses that had him rolling.

"I'll teach _you_ to stick your nasty, spit in_ my_ ear!" I growled, pounding my fists against his hard plastron.

"Okay, okay!" he bellowed with laughter. I frowned at the effortless ease he displayed, lifting me from his person and onto a spot beside him.

I sighed, rubbing my thumb against the thin bridge of my nose, "These past few days have been one hell of a ride. Apparently, you find Human girls a-attractive."

He grinned wickedly, "I _do."_

"And...Well...It kind of sucks that the guy who wrote me all those...nice love notes turned out just to be some fraud..."

I released another soft, quiet sigh when Bowser snapped around urgently. His entire form grew tense and his eyes sharpened with hot anger, "_What_ did you just say?"

I peered at him with a lopsided smile, "Yeah...during my courtship, believe it or not, Taurus wrote love notes and...spoke about how my hair glowed like fire and how my eyes sparkled like diamonds..." I shook my head to forcibly clear the thoughts away, "Oh nevermind...it's silly..."

A stretch of silence passed where Bowser stared at me, mouth agape, eyes hot like fire. I stopped smiling, "...What?"

"_Flower_," Bowser growled so gutturally, I turned to face him, "Taurus did _not_ write those letters to you. I can't believe that _stupid, tacky-ass _human had the _nerve_ to steal undue credit..."

I arched an eyebrows and placed my hands on my hips, "...Then who wrote them?"

Bowser's jaw snapped shut as his eyes doubled in size. He realized he had suddenly placed himself unwittingly in a hot seat, "Uh..."

"Well, if you know it wasn't Taurus," Still grinning wickedly, I crossed my arms, eyes narrowed as I leaned towards him, "then you know who wrote them _right_?"

"L-Look, i-it's not important," he spat out, suddenly nervous, "J-Just know Taurus didn't write them alright!? As if that slick-haired bastard could write _such _high level poetry."

"Then tell me who wrote it," I took several steps closer, eyes burning intently on his person.

"W-Whomever he is, h-he wouldn't want you to know, okay!?" Bowser swallowed loud enough for me to hear.

I approached again, "Bowser, I _want_ to know..."

A curious tendril of sweat dribbled down the side of his face, "I ain't telling you a thing!"

My eyes sparkled with wicked glee, "Bowser, you are _going_ to tell me who wrote those love letters."

Something curious began to happen, Bowser, who was always aggressive and brazen began to back away. With each step I took forward, he mirrored, moving away.

Ah, so we were playing a game of blitty and mouser huh? A sly grin curved across my face, "You're _going_ to tell me who wrote those letters..."

"Over my dead body."

"That can be arranged," I grinned, crackling my knuckles.

I leapt out towards him and he released a startled growl. I laughed as he darted behind a table and I quickly pursued. No _wonder _why Bowser loved to chase me, this was so much _fun_! I could finally turn the tables on him. I was close enough to touch him, "Ooh, is the bad big king scared of a tiny princess?"

And with that I reached over the table and tickled his bicep. His face flushed dark red, mouth agog as I burst with laughter. We continued our chase, he was limping as fast as he could and I pursued _just _fast enough to tail him.

And each time I touched him, I made sure to tickle or prod him. In my most recent success, I smoothed my hand down the length of his arm, enticing a deep purr from the flustered king.

"W-Will you cut that _out_!?" he growled with no true conviction. He was completely red-faced, and yet again he was nearly blistering hot to the touch, as if his skin was wired to an oven.

But did I care? No. I was too busy laughing my ass off, "Come on Bowwy! _Spill_!"

He was so flustered so completely frazzled that he didn't realize when I had backed him into a corner and when he realized he had been trapped, it was too late. His eyes darted around wildly as I blocked his path, grinning wildly.

"Now then, why won't you tell me!?" I tapped my foot impatiently, smirking at his flushed face.

"W-Why do you want to know _so badly_!?" he growled. He clenched his fists, "It's friggin' _annoying._"

I stared at him as if he were insane, "Because it's a _love _note! Who _doesn't_ want to know!? Now you're going to tell me who wrote it Bowwy, or else..."

His red eyes watched my every move carefully, "Or else _what_...?"

I marched closer to him until I was barely a foot away. I placed my hand on his bicep and began to gently rub my hand across the length of his muscular arm. His face slowly grew more and more red and his temperature spiked, skin _smoldering_ as I grinned, "Still not gonna tell huh?"

I normally wouldn't intrude on his personal space_—_okay yeah I_ would_ because he does it to me all the time_—_but his completely irrational overreactions and flushed face emboldened my resolve. I grinned, enjoying the odd pull of power I had over the king who was normally so bold and shameless in his actions.

I began to tickle him, laughing as his face burned red.

"Flower _q-quit_!" He growled through his teeth, face growing more and more red with each passing second.

I was too busy laughing, "Nuh uh! Not until you tell me what I want to knoooow~!"

I continued my relentless tickle attack, fingers scribbling across any unprotected scaly skin they could find. For a moment I thought Bowser had given up; he was squeezed as tightly as he could into the corner and his head was lowered, blocking my view of his face and eyes.

He literally stopped fighting against me, shutting down altogether. I was considering relenting because of his odd lack of reaction until he suddenly bolted forward with a deep rumbling growl. I shrieked as he snatched me, lifting me clear off the floor in one clean motion and reversed our positions.

I found myself with my back against the wall, pinned between him and the wall. I peered at him wide-eyed as the king glowered at me furiously, his face mere inches away.

Though Bowser was snarling, his face was still flushed and his eyes seared a darker, richer mahogany. His breathing was labored, soft pants tickling my cheek as his electric eyes blazed hot.

"If you don't _quit_," he growled in a deep, rough voice, "I'm _going_ to return the favor. Tenfold. You _annoying, sassy, succulent_..."

His eyes became hooded as his voice dropped into a rumbling timber, "...naughty little Desert vixen."

There was something about the intensity in his stare that had me double taking. I could feel the strong pounding of his heart in tandem with my own as his heart raced.

I swallowed thickly peering up at him unsurely; there was something wild, and animalistic behind his stare. I blinked, laughing nervously as I was still being pinned under those intense maroon eyes, "Whoa! C-Calm down Bowwy! I was just kidding!"

"Kidding my scaly _ass_."

I laughed, "I _was_! I'll quit now, okay? I didn't know it bothered you that much!"

But he didn't let go and for a few long moments he studied me, claws lightly teasing my shoulders and toying with the locks of my hair as he continued to stare intently; I couldn't tell if he was pissed, thinking or confused. I blinked, peering at his odd expression, "Bowser...? _Bowwy_? You're still holding me."

Holding was an understatement. He was practically crushing me into the wall with very little room between us. My torso was completely mashed against his hard plastron which was beginning to uncomfortably dig into my flesh.

Again he emitted a blistering hot aura, which I didn't know if it resonated from his body temperature or if it was some side effect of his flame breathing.

Bowser blinked, snapping out of his odd trance, "Huh? Oh..."

His eyes became coherent and focused as he carefully let me go, making sure my feet touched the floor before completely relinquishing his hold. I peered at him skeptically as he rubbed the back of his head, "Sorry, crazy Koopa reaction, thing."

I titled my head curiously, "It's a 'Koopa reaction' to go into a trance?"

"Sorta...?" he made sure not to catch my gaze, "It's just that c-certain scents tend to drive you _wild_. It floods your nostrils and suddenly becomes the only thing you can think of. A-And your scent smells good. _Really good._"

I blinked, "What do I smell like?"

"It's hard to explain. It's like your scent has layers to it. The most noticeable are koopa berries. You smell like ripe, juicy Koopa berries," I don't think it was intentional when Bowser licked his maw afterwards, "Then there's, floral notes behind that. Then there's a...humany scent..."

I arched a brow, "'Humany scent'? What do humans smell like?"

He shrugged, "Dunno how to explain it. Koopas have a certain base smell, just like humans have a certain scent to them. All creatures have a certain scent to them; Goombas, piranhas...whatever."

"How cool," I was truly intrigued by this, "Does my scent ever change...?"

"_Uh_..." Bowser's face flushed red as he suddenly coughed into his fist, pointedly clearing his throat, "l-let's talk about something else, eh?"

"Alright," I decided to give him an out on that one. Though I was curious to ask more on the topic. It sounded interesting, human senses were nowhere near as sensitive as those of the Koopa diaspora, "You know, Dad's going to the Aqualands two days from now."

Bowser blinked, "Huh, oh yeah."

I sat on the bed and it wasn't even seconds later that Bowser joined me. Just inches away, I could still feel the blistering envelope of heat surrounding him like a flame.

"He told me he's going fully armed with an entire squadron of guards, so he's going to be safe," I chuckled, "Those Aqualandians will be_ sorry_ if they try anything with him. That and he's an expert in judo. He hides it well, but he's no joke."

"Ah," Bowser arched an impish brow and grinned, "So daddy taught you some moves huh? I've seen your roundhouse and it's pretty serious."

"Thanks," I laughed, "Yeah, dad taught me a few basics in self defense. Enough to disarm a foe."

"Your dad's a smart human," Bowser nodded absently, "He seems like a person who plans everything out step by step."

"He's leaving really early, so I'll spend all day with him tomorrow," I smiled back at Bowser, "Who knows, maybe Taurus will stop being an idiot and come to some kind of agreement. Or he'll just leave Sarasaland alone altogether. Both work just fine for me. I wouldn't like to see his face in this lifetime _again_."

Bowser frowned, peering away, " Flower I've dealt with power-hungry pricks before and I know for a _fact_ Taurus, being the supreme asswipe that he is, is _not_ going to give up. This wi_—_"

I frowned, staring at the bed, "You think something awful is going to happen to him? To Dad? And that Taurus is going to make this really bad for Sarasaland...?"

Unexpectedly, Bowser had a sudden change of heart, "You know what? Maybe...Just _maybe_ I'm wrong. Things will work out. So stop worrying."

"You think things will be okay?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah! Hell, who am I to rain on your parade? Everything's going to work out just fine."

And with that he nudged me lightly in the side. I smiled, returning the gesture. Bowser smirked mischievously, nudging me an eighth harder this time and it started up another playful bout between us.

Neither of us willing to back down, we continued our immature game. I laughed, trying to force him off the bed. The clock in the suite chimed, signaling it was far later than I had expected.

I peered at the clock, "Well, I think I better go. Maids will come into my room and will expect me there."

Bowser smirked, "Alright. Why don't you give a studly king a goodnight hug."

I rolled my eyes, stepping towards him and gingerly wrapped my arms around his middle. He was still warm, not as hot and roasting as before, but pleasantly warm. I froze when I felt a kiss pressed against the top of my hair.

"Sweet dreams _Purga_," he rumbled, purring.

I pulled away, meeting the bright red eyes of my friend. His gaze was soft, observing. I blinked, realizing he had spoken and that I was staring back at him blankly like an _idiot_, "Oh...uh...goodnight Bowser."

He walked me to the door and waited for me to leave his sight before closing the door. These kisses certainly were coming more often. Ugh, these past few days have been one helluva emotional rollercoaster ride. You know what will make me feel better? Tomorrow I'll call the Koopalings and talk to them.

I peered back at Bowser's suite. The intense wine-red _stare _and the blistering heat that radiated off his form; I wonder what that meant for Koopas. _Anger?_ Or...

I shook my head and continued on my way; I had somewhere to be and would be in trouble if I wasn't in my bedchambers soon.

* * *

><p>Ass-kissing, though difficult to define, was something everyone knew when they saw it. The self-effacing groveling and overdone flattery universally transcended the well-fortified barriers of race, gender and class.<p>

But as the reigning king of the most affluent kingdom, Bowser had easily become particularly adept at recognizing kiss-assery in its many forms.

Sarasaland may not have been as exuberant and as overt as the Darklands was when it came to kissing-ass—sometimes councilors with shameless loads of kiss ass, sent shitloads of coins and even a beautiful young Koopette or two to tempt the king—but Sarasaland was not to be outdone.

Bowser saw through their ruse with no difficulty whatsoever; Sarasaland was unapologetically trying to keep and win his favor so that upon his return to the Darklands, he would prevent blame from being placed upon Sarasaland for his received injuries.

These past two days brought in new servants—and it was_ always_ a young, stunning woman—who would dote upon him; the fleet of flawless maids changed the linens daily so they remained fresh and lightly scented, fluffed his pillows, buttered him up with palatable desserts, expensive chocolates, aged chilled wines and treated him to the most relaxing massages.

Today wasn't any different as a soft wrapping of knuckles tapped against the door. Bowser grunted his ascent and the maid unlocked the door with swift, silent fingers.

Yet again, the maid was another young, beautiful—let's be real here, she was _banging_—youth and gifted with the telltale Desert features of shimmering dark hair, glowing bronze skin and beguiling, inky eyes.

Her ebony hair fell to her hips in a thick inky veil and the moment they locked stares, she demurely averted her eyes, thick lashes fluttering like wings.

That was another trait Bowser quickly picked up, the women of Sarasaland were a complete contrast from his own; they were demure, quiet, and they moved, as if naturally imbued with such grace.

Darklandian Koopettes were forward, vocal about their thoughts, strong and had a ferocious, fierce beauty about them. Yet where did Flower come in? In a kingdom where silence and patience seemed prized in a woman, she was the direct opposite, willful and proud.

The servant babe fell into a graceful courtesy before sweeping into the room so silently, the King had to strain his sensitive hearing to catch her dainty footfalls.

A soft breath of lavender hit his nostrils as she moved closer, gently changing his bloodied bandages with a touch softer than a dove's breast. She carefully set aside the soiled bandages and smoothed the last, clean cloth over the king's injured arm.

The maid hottie gently placed another chilled bottle of wine at his feet, a bowl of white-chocolate covered strawberries and a large bowl of spicy meat stew. The servant curtsied once more, muttering something in Sarasalandian before quietly turning to leave.

Bowser veraciously dove into the meal, shoveling piping hot spoonfuls of soup until his spoon clattered against the bowel's empty bottom. He drained the wine that was so cold it numbed his fangs and devoured the strawberries until they were gone.

After one loud, satisfied belch later, Bowser reclined in bed; if Sarasaland _really _wanted his forgiveness, they should stop screwing around and offer their princess' hand in marriage.

Bowser grinned wickedly at the thought; _if they did that, I'd more than just forgive them. I'd build them anything they wanted, give any rare gift, slay any enemy they wanted to see dead. ANYTHING._

The door to his room opened. Bowser froze the second _Sakuro_ stepped into the room, with all the warmth and presence of an arctic gale.

The emperor arrived, steps so smooth and quiet he might as well have been gliding. At Sakuro's sudden unexpected approach, Bowser subconsciously sat up straighter, eyes narrowed and guard up.

Sakuro spoke in a smooth, flawless tenor, "Am I to come in...?"

Bowser paused, surprised and a little concerned that he hadn't even bothered to smell the approaching newcomer or even to listen to the pattern of his footfalls. The Emperor of Sarasaland walked as if he had all the time in the universe and was in a rush for no one.

_Should_ he have an audience with the emperor? There was something about the staid, quiet emperor that set the king and his senses on edge.

And Bowser had no idea why. With Mario, it was because the puny dynamo had shown himself as a true threat. Plumber Dickweed was the only force on the planet, in the galaxy maybe that could soundly kick his kingly ass.

But with Sakuro? There was nothing remotely physically threatening about the emperor, in fact Sakuro was old enough to be his dad—he was Flower's.

Emperor Sakuro had delicate aristocratic features more suiting on a doll and his appearance may have been even _girly_ with all that ebony hair.

Someone that refined should _not_ be able to set him on edge. And yet he did. Because there was something cold and smooth and unyielding behind the emperor's blue eyes.

"Uh...yeah," Bowser cursed in his head; _don't stumble and stutter over your words like a moron. You're the most powerful king and one insignificant human should not make you feel nervous._

And yet he _did._

Maybe it was because Bowser always knew deep down in his gut that the stoic Emperor was _watching_ him. As if Sakuro was diligently analyzing and dissecting his behavior, actions, for any show of flaw.

There was just something about the emperor of Sarasaland that was a blaring paradox; he was chivalrous, mannerly and yet there was something about him that screamed you did _not_ want to mess around and end up on his bad side.

Maybe it was his cutting way with words, or how whenever looked upon you, you felt the tangible weight of his stare and it felt as if he were slowly dissecting you, trying to _slowly _unlock your deepest secrets...

With no more than a foot between them, the emperor stopped on the dime, as if some invisible barrier prevented him from advancing an inch closer. Sakuro peered at Bowser for a second or two before speaking, "Good morning, King Bowser. How are you fairing?"

Bowser suddenly sat up as straight as he possibly could, expression as hard as slate, "Morning, Emperor," he growled in his deepest timber, "I'm doing well."

Sakuro nodded, glacial blues studying him with that annoying level of intensity again, "That is pleasing to hear. The court of Sarasaland wishes for your rapid recovery. We are elated that your injuries are healing well. We have suggested that the royal physician attend you personally."

Bowser nodded mutely; did anyone ever notice how _weird_ he spoke? It was always Sarasaland _this _or we of Sarasaland _that_; it was never an 'I want to see you better' or 'I think you're an asswad.'

It was as if Sakuro spoke for multiple people in one breath. As if Emperor Sarasaland couldn't give a personal opinion of his own. Which was odd, considering how Bowser spoke his mind twenty four seven no matter how crude, blunt or crass his words were.

"Thanks," Bowser grumbled.

Then they were both silent; neither man—nor Koopa—male, guy, _whatever _liked the other. At _all_. While Sakuro was pretending to politely study the room's abstract statue sculptures—that in Bowser's opinion looked like two _really _perverted piranha plants humping each other—Bowser glared in the clear opposite direction.

It may have not been blatantly obvious to Flower—well she was just clueless about most things pertaining to men, especially when it came to how they felt about her—but they both couldn't _stand_ each other.

Where the female gender communicated verbally, with strong eye contact and even touch, men were about territory and postures. Observantly reading the slightest twitch of a muscle or sensing a hostile glower.

One good, solid dirty glare could communicate much more efficiently than words ever could. Sakuro had done that very well in fact, during their first meeting at Daisy's _Summani._

A puny human staring him down not only earned his respect, but also challenged his strength. They may have been different species, races, but the language of testosterone was _universal_. They both knew what the other man wanted and what his endgame was. Flower was the girl and they both loved her very deeply.

Finally Sakuro turned to peer at him, and if Bowser wasn't so on his guard, he would have missed the subtle sweep of the emperor's eyes across his frame, analyzing yet again for weakness; that was a classical masculine technique straight from the man manual, article no. 302, the 'I'm sizing you up to see how much of a punk bitch you are.'

And King Bowser was no one's bitch.

..._Unless_ Princess Daisy donned a skintight black leather catsuit, crazy kick-ass six-inch man-eating heels and cracked a whip with a wild, crazy grin...

Then and _only_ then would he be someone's bitch. For a split second, Sakuro's stern visage evaporated like smoke as Bowser suddenly imagined himself chained up to a wall, held hostage in handcuffs as Daisy—while laughing seductively—cracked a whip and whispered foul things to him with devil-red _lips..._

"Did you hear me, King Bowser?"

"_HUH_?" Bowser coughed, quickly clearing his throat, "Oh, uh..."

No. Hell no. Imagination Daisy had been _owning _him.

"We of Sarasaland greatly admire a woman's virtue and would defend, let alone kill to protect her and her honor. In our custom there is nothing more sacred and admirable than a virtuous woman."

Bowser cracked an eyebrow before saying, "So Taurus is on some Star damn thin ice then for all the crap he's pulled eh?"

Sakuro didn't blink, "_Very_ thin. Anyways, I came in here to inform you of my departure. I'm going to see Prince Taurus, unaccompanied."

_Alone?_ Bowser titled his head and narrowed his eyes until shadows dimmed his glittering irises, "Alone? You shi—_kiddin'_ me? That's got to be the dumbest idea ever. A blind Magikoopa with a bag over his head could even see that trap coming."

"My hands are tied," Sakuro hummed, ignoring the other king's blunt speech, "The entire world is watching to see what Sarasaland will do. How will Sarasaland be remembered? Will we do all within our reasonable power to stop strife, or will our monarchs safeguard our lives and cower behind the walls of our kingdom? One king's life is not worth the turmoil of his people. A true king must do what's best."

The ominous statement hung in the air like a lingering, unpleasant odor. Bowser peered at the emperor warily as the cogs in his mind spun furiously; was this guy willingly going to walk into an obvious ambush!?

There was nothing even _remotely_ trustworthy about Taurus, so again he had to wonder; was Sakuro really going to walk into the Aqualands kingdom with nothing more than a prayer?

"Either you're incredibly crazy or brave," Bowser spoke with no lack of awe. Then he laughed, barely smirking, "Shit, to be frank, I kind of respect that. Walking straight into enemy territory and telling em' 'do your worst.'"

Sakuro, who had been wistfully staring out the window with a far off gaze, finally met stares with Bowser and for once there was no strife or jaded suspicion. Maybe there was even a faintest spark of understanding.

"If I do not return, I'm hoping Sarasaland will be guaranteed an instant military backing from the Darklands...?" Sakuro arched an eyebrow, purposefully letting the morbid statement trail off.

Something cold and anxious roiled uncomfortably within the king's gut, like a serpent squirming around in his stomach, "You don't even have to ask. You realize...Princess Daisy has no clue that you're doing this. She's happily oblivious. She thinks you're going _with guards. _She wouldn't be okay with this if she knew you were going alone."

Sakuro's eyes narrowed, "She knows good and well that I'm going to the Aqualands."

Bowser laughed with no humor, "She doesn't know that you're blatantly walking into a trap _unguarded._ And planning _not _to return._"_

"And truthfully, I hope it shall _stay_ that way, King Bowser."

Sakuro nodded, and with nothing more to say on the matter, he inclined his head before turning and leaving as quietly as a stared at the doorframe where Sakuro had passed through, awed, confused and maybe even a little disheartened.

That was ominous as hell; that was a man planning his own death, let alone having a hand in digging his own grave. What in the hell was the Emperor's plan here!?

Sakuro seemed hinged on things going_ very_ wrong, and if they did, he already had a plan b in motion: the Darklands would mobilize in a united front with Sarasaland and take to arms. And Sakuro knew that anyone the Darklands went against was _wrecked_.

Boldly marching into inhospitable territory was...Kind of a stud move. Bowser reclined in bed, wondering if there was some kind of back up, or secret service he could send to the Emperor's aid.

He may have not exactly gotten on with the man, but the idea of Sakuro being mercilessly tortured, or ending up dead for defending something as righteous as his daughter's honor didn't sit well within the tattered, remaining threads of conscience he had left. Besides, Sakuro _had_ to be there to give Flower away at their wedding.

"Shit," Bowser sighed, halfway growling the profanity, "If that stuck-up Emperor dies, Flower's going to be miserable and I'm gonna be pissed. And then, people will die by the dozens because the Darklands will mobilize for combat."

Bowser released a sigh, crossing his arms and resting his eyes. All this spurned from Taurus' greed. Maybe Flower won't have to be married to be a queen. If Sakuro doesn't come back, she's going to be ruling Sarasaland pretty soon...

Eyes cut into thin lines, Bowser peered at his smashed phone, the wheels in his head spinning.

* * *

><p>The emperor's carriage was ready to depart; it was nearly dawn and the desert was a blistering eighty degrees. A half circle of worried, sweating councilors stood around the Emperor's prepped carriage, wrinkled faces etched with worry and brow lines kissed with perspiration.<p>

Salini and Zero stood nearest to the emperor, concern all but too clear upon their faces. Sakuro peered at Zero and spoke lightly, "You look so troubled young man, worrying will give you premature gray hair. Don't want to end up like your father do you?"

"As long as I've known him, father's always had gray hair," Zero mumbled unenthusiastically.

The High protectorate laughed dryly, "He's right. I've always been _old_. Must have been at least forty when Zero was born..." Then the high protectorate's face quickly grew ashen, "Sakuro. I _must _reiterate again how awful this idea is. Sarasaland needs her emperor. The empress needs you, Princess Daisy needs you, she is still too inexperienced to rule. Don't do this to her. Don't do this to us."

In a rare show of emotion, Salini's face grew ashen, wrinkles clustering towards his furrowed brows. He placed a firm hand on the emperor's shoulder and squeezed, "Sakuro quit being foolish now...I've buried your father and I do _not_ plan to see another Desert king buried in my lifetime. I've planned to have you do my eulogy. Don't ruin that for me."

"They're going to make you suffer," Zero whispered, chestnut brown eyes alive with emotion, "You'll wish you've never been born. The Aqualands is famed for its vicious water boarding. They'll make your end awful."

Sakuro's face grew smooth and cold and emotionless, "I certainly hope they do. Because if I survive, I'd come after them with a tenacity rarely seen and make them wish they'd never been conceived."

The emperor turned to face his younger brother, who looked far too serious and somber. Sakuro smirked with no real humor, "Is this the lengths I had to take to get you to look so serious?"

"Sakuro," Apricotto even spoke in a deep timbre, "If...If you don't come back...I swear...I-I'm going to kill those Aqualandian royals...A-And I'd see each one of them _gone_."

"Don't be ridiculous," Sakuro frowned, "You hate violence, you can't stand the sight, let alone smell of blood. You fainted when you accidentally broke your nose as a child because you were bleeding."

"I won't let my brother go off and get killed!" Apricotto hissed, blue eyes blazing, "I'm n-not gonna see Mom cry, o-or see Daisy become an orphan! Don't expect me to sit back and be okay with this!"

Sakuro placed a calming hand on his brother's shoulder, "She won't be an orphan with you, Mother and Peach watching her, the way the Stars watch over the earth. I need you to be their rock."

"Me? I-I'm no good for _that,_" Apricotto frowned, "_You_ are the rock! You're serious and smart, smarter than I'll _ever_ be. You come ba—"

"_Apricotto_," Sakuro deadpanned, "I _need_ you to be their rock. Can. You. Do that? One last thing for me? One last thing for your older brother."

Apricotto's anger dissolved as he grimaced, "'One last thing'? _One last thing_!? Stars, did you mean to say that!?"

"Can you do it?" Sakuro whispered, staring dead into the blue rings of his brother's eyes.

Apricotto peered at him like a kicked puppy; eyes enlarged and mouth trembling, as if words or wails wanted to explode from beneath his lips. He took a deep sigh of acquittal, looking more miserable than before, "Okay...I can do it. I will."

Sakuro allowed the briefest of smiles to flicker across his face. Apricotto pulled him into a harsh, terse hug and squeezed him hard enough that the emperor felt his lower vertebrae pop.

With one last embrace, Sakuro pulled away and purposefully ignored Apricotto. Those big, blue eyes would destroy the last of his resolve, which had been gradually dwindling each passing second. Sakuro released a trembling breath and turned to Toss, "Ready?"

Toss was frowning, eyes dark and clouded with emotion but he managed to nod. He opened the door and bowed as Sakuro quickly slid into his seat.

The door closed and it wasn't seconds later when the carriage began to rock with movement. The emperor peered at the Sarasalandian palace retreating into the horizon, wondering if this would be the last time he saw it.

_Mother..._

_Chisana..._

Sakuro closed his eyes, bowing his head as he waited for the upsetting waves of nausea to pass. He took a sip of iced water to soothe his parched throat, only to realize his stomach was so bloated with nerves and guts that he nearly up heaved right then and there.

* * *

><p>The arrival into the freezing, showery Aqualands territory was a sharp contrast from the comforting dry arid heat Sakuro had been used to. The sky above was a dour, brewing stew of ugly gray clouds pregnant of rain and cold misery. Sakuro watched the scenery pass by lethargically, mind too cluttered with scattered thoughts to truly take in everything around him.<p>

He jolted when the carriage came to an abrupt halt and the emperor realized with no small touch of dread that the Aqualandian palace stood before him, reaching and stretching until the tops of the castle vanished within opaque clouds of mist and fog.

Sakuro stepped out of the carriage, hands trembling so badly that he carefully hid them within his long sleeves. He nodded to Toss who had neatly fallen into a bow.

It had been seconds since their arrival and already the Aqualandian guards approached, long strides devouring the distance. Their ebon armor gleamed like obsidian and their weapons, though not poised for a strike, were in sight and obvious.

Toss turned to peer at his king nervously and when he spoke, it was barely a whisper, "Sire. I _must _insist that you don't do _this_. Walking into their castle completely unguarded is _suicidal_!"

Sakuro peered ahead, expression deadlocked in stone, " If they've planned to have me killed, then there was nothing stopping them the moment we crossed their borders. They are aware that we come unaided. The prince wishes to hear me out."

The Toad servant grew silent, but his eyes were pleading, "_Please_ don't do this Emperor. I've been driving your carriage for over twenty something years. You gave me my first job, and you personally gave me a raise when you heard how the bank was going to foreclose my house...I can't leave you here. I. Just. _Can't._"

Sakuro coolly gauged their approaching company; the Aqualandian guards were just about on top of their position, close enough that their silver eyes were visible from beneath their fin-shaped helmets. The Emperor's eyes briefly flickered across their sharp lances and blades before smoothly turning to Toss.

"Keep the promise you've made me," Sakuro's face was carefully void of any emotion, "that if I don't return within an hour, you vacate the kingdom immediately."

Toss's expression crumpled, contorting with anguish, "_Sire_..."

"Leave the carriage behind. There's no sense in dragging any deadweight. Starblaster is a quick steed, he'll get you to the Sarasalandian border within half an hour."

The loud clinking of armor stopped directly behind them; the Aqualandians must have been a breadth away. Toss quickly staggered away, face growing ashen as the line of stern-faced guards loomed nearer, "Emperor, the prince will see you now. Please accompany us to the throne room."

"Yes of course, please lead the way gentlemen," Sakuro locked gazes with Toss, sending him one last meaningful stare before turning and following the armed procession into a green lush garden.

The garden was beautiful and diligently well-manicured; flowers bloomed in fresh, fragrant bright bursts, bushes and various deciduous trees were artfully shaped like majestic sea creatures. Upon their short march to the palace, their congregation passed by a shattered golden statue.

Glittering golden chunks were scattered along the stone tiles indecorously and disconcertingly enough, half of a shattered golden head lay gruesomely on the floor like the remains of a decapitated casualty.

Sakuro mentally brushed over a few facts, remembering that the wrecked statue was a point of contention with the Aqualands; it had been wrecked during Daisy's kingdom tour and though there had been no witnesses to the event, the Aqualands was more than happy to pile the blame upon Sarasaland.

However, seeing the beheaded statue in ruin did nothing to quell the emperor's growing anxieties, if anything the desecrated sculpture was left to candidly let him know of how very unaccommodating the Aqualands was going to be.

The guards unrolled the large, creaking double doors and stepped aside to allow entry. A sentinel turned to glower at him, "His majesty awaits you in the room dead ahead."

Sakuro nodded before stepping in and there was a loud, thunderous rattle as the large doors behind him rolled shut. This was it, the moment of truth: he was officially sealed in, alone within a sea of discontented foes. A cold, clammy dread coiled within the pit of the emperor's stomach and clenched his innards mercilessly.

Another vicious wave of nauseous nearly made Sakuro double over. He was miles away from his kingdom, too far to flee to his mount and his exposed back was wide open for any discontented Aqualandian spear or blade.

Sakuro took several deep breaths before straightening up, wiping the sweat from his hairline and setting his face in its famed neutrality.

Now was certainly not the time for weakness. The oily, calculating eyes of the Aqualandians were upon him, watching and analyzing for the slightest sign of weakness: flushed skin, quaking hands, sweat upon the brow.

Yet they were sorely pressed for luck because they would not know how parched his throat was or how wildly his heart raced or how ill he felt; Emperor Sakuro's visage was perfectly composed. And with all his famed regality and poise, he sauntered to the throne room.

The emperor wordlessly glided passed the elegant lines of ebony armor and stepped into the throne room where he found Prince Taurus resting upon his father's large throne, posture relaxed and loose. The prince's silver eyes narrowed as the thinnest slip of a smirk crossed his visage.

It was custom to have a monarch's arrival announced, but most importantly it was _unspeakably_ rude, borderline hostile to have a guest appear unannounced and that's exactly what Taurus had arranged.

Neither man was unaware of the intentional belligerence and Sakuro was positive the Aqualandian prince wanted him to feel uneasy. A pregnant pause lingered in the throne room as neither man spoke.

Emperor Sakuro stood before the throne with a perfectly straight face, posture tall, strong and unrelenting; while it was protocol to be announced so too was it customary for a visitor to bow while visiting a court.

And Sakuro didn't.

This time Taurus couldn't hide his amused smirk; _what an arrogant man. Not bad considering how pathetic Sarasaland is_. The Aqualandian prince finally grew tired of their stare down and decided to get to business. Taurus lazily flicked his palm, sending his guards out the room and once they were alone, he spoke.

"I see no point in useless etiquette and pleasantries," Taurus began in a relaxed, smooth drawl, smiling as he spoke, "We both are busy men and have other things to see to. To be frank, I have demands to be met."

"And if they are reasonable, Sarasaland shall accommodate a cooperative Aqualands," Sakuro replied perfunctorily, "In a show of Sarasaland's fortitude and goodwill, I have made an appearance at your behest."

"Your court, your daughter have offended my people, have besmirched my sensibilities," Taurus leaned forward slowly, interlacing his digits together, "Atonement for Sarasalands' actions are the only medicating choice of action. What do you offer to mollify this discord?"

"There's little doubt in my mind you'd like reparations," Sakuro spoke coolly, "However you forget yourself prince. Sarasaland has not come to the Aqualandian court to apologize nor rationalize our princess' behavior. We have come to graciously accept an apology and reopen trade."

Unbridled surprise flashed across the prince's handsome features before Taurus began to laugh deeply, truly amused, "_What?_ 'Accept my apology' did you say? My word that's _hilarious_. Emperor Sakuro, you've been heralded as brilliant, and yet your behavior sorely contradicts such acclamation. _You _think _I _will apologize? Absurd."

Sakuro didn't bat an eye, "I come here willing to overlook your grave trespasses against Sarasaland and her princess. You would be wise to set your ego aside for the sake of peace."

"And perhaps _Emperor_, for the _sake of peace_ you will apologize and then we shall speak of a trade agreement again," Taurus was still grinning, finding the entire stint amusing.

Sakuro subtly raised a brow, "An apology issued from Sarasaland will reinstate our agreement?"

"An apology_ I_ deem as _proper _will reinstate our water agreement at a _third_ of what it once was prior to this mishap. And if Sarasaland continues to behave," Taurus shrugged noncommittally, grinning "then I will return the treaty as it was."

If Taurus hadn't been watching the emperor closely, he would have missed how Sakuro's eyes narrowed fractionally, "I'm afraid this is where we must disagree. Sarasaland finds the contingences of your plan both flawed and insulting."

Yet again Taurus balked with loud, ringing laughter, smiling wide enough that his entire front row of teeth were showing, "How so Emperor? Please clarify exactly what it is that you—I mean—_Sarasaland_ finds insulting. The only thing I find insulting is how unspeakably rude your little princess is."

"The Aqualands are at complete liability and yet fault is childishly passed onto the shoulders of the crown princess for your reprehensible behavior." Sakuro recited everything with a nearly mechanized, stoic countenance. This was business, and Taurus' immature jabs at his daughter wouldn't get in the way of what Sakuro had been brought here for.

Taurus rested his spine against the throne, silver eyes sharp and cut into thin slits as he grinned, "Truth be told Emperor, I like that you speak the bold-faced truth. Too many royals are nothing but simpering sycophants filled with hot air and hauteur and originally I thought of you similar to them but beneath all those spun words is honesty."

The prince paused, either for effect or because he was truly considering his words. Sakuro didn't care what his modus operandi was, he was only listening for words relevant to their business as everything else—the hauteur and court circus tricks—went in one ear and passed through the other.

"I consider myself a fair man," Taurus indulgently studied his fingernails, "I shall propose a new, agreeable bargain because I like you. If you give me your princess, I will forget this entire thing. As if it had _never_ happened. The trade agreement will be fully reinstated as it once was, and we shall no longer hold embittered resentment. We both win: Sarasaland will have a wed princess and all the water her wells need as the Aqualands will save face. How's that?"

Sakuro barely arched a dubious brow, "Sarasaland finds herself perplexed. You wish to take our princess as a bride?"

"As a _gift_," Taurus was smiling.

An abrupt hot flash of anger pulsed within the emperor's blood, one that he had to quickly quell with well-honed patience. This man was demanding to have his precious _Chisana_ offered up to him like a trinket, like a prize.

Sakuro took an unnoticeable deep breath, slowly exhaling through his nostrils to slow the heated, agitated blood racing through his calmly acknowledged the prince's arrogance and entitlement and forcibly pressed his own emotions aside.

_Sarasaland before self. Kingdom before self-interest. Business before emotion. Stay centered._

After exhaling a calming deep breath through his nose, Sakuro was back under control and neutral. When the Emperor spoke, none of his underlying ire surfaced on his face, "Princess Sarasaland is the pearlescent gem in Sarasaland's illustrious crown. She is not to be bartered like common trade."

"What was that garbage you said when you first walked in here?" Taurus' silver eyes glittered like quicksilver, "Some hot air about Sarasaland being accommodating? Just so you remember _we _hold all the cards and _we're_ upset with_ your_ kingdom. I've stated my terms. Do you want a war over this emperor?" Taurus grinned, "Because I will see your pathetic people crushed and then I will _take_ your daughter as my _slave_."

The emperor remained silent. He finally released a sigh, one which Taurus took as a show of weakness. Prince Aqualands grinned with malicious amusement, "What's the_ matter_ Emperor? Finally seeing all the trouble that worthless girl has caused?"

"I was told the ruler of the Aqualands was an impudent child," Sakuro spoke noncommittally as if commenting on something as trivial as the climate, " but they failed to mention how selfish and absolutely foolish you are. You have my deepest sympathies child."

Taurus abruptly stopped smiling, eyes narrowed and thin.

"Once upon a time your father and I were great friends. He must be rolling over in his grave to have his heir ruining his legacy. In the future I must remind myself not to think of you when I think of King Aries, it would be awful to soil his memory with the thought of your misdeeds."

A hot prickle of ire shot up Taurus' spine so quickly that he jerked to his feet unsteadily, rising so fast that for a second his vision spun.

Teeth clenched in a twisted snarl, Taurus' eyes flashed, irises scorching white with rage as Sakuro continued serenely, "You are nothing more than a _boy_ pretending to be a man, a child sitting upon a pricey throne and yet knowing nothing of its regulation nor of its true power."

"You _insolent_," Taurus' voice rattled unsteadily, face turning pink with anger, "_Insignificant_, _Desert pea_—"

"The expense of war is costly, paid with precious blood and lives that can never be repaid," Sakuro didn't blink, "Understanding this balance is paramount to being a great ruler. And you sorely lack this ability."

"You _will _respect me," Taurus growled. His digits clenched the arms of the throne so tightly that the tips of his fingers became red.

"You could give Sarasaland all the water it needed and I would not think any better of you," with a pointed motion, the emperor turned his back on Taurus and the Aqualandian throne, "this has been a futile attempt to change the unalterable. I will take my leave of you."

Taurus rose to his feet, eyes blazing and face as red as a sparky, "I'm not through with you yet _Sakuro_," he was so furious, so unhinged that when he spoke, spittle flew from his mouth, "You won't go anywhere until I send you on your way."

The emperor continued to make headway for the exit, tuning out the raging prince's needling words as he walked with all the poise and regality worthy of his station.

In a last, desperate attempt to shatter Sakuro's superiority, Taurus shot out, "It's ironic how you admonish me for being a disgrace and yet your _little redheaded_ _harlot_ is the true disgrace."

The emperor slowed his amble, finally coming to a complete stop. For a moment Sakuro paused, as if deliberating over his choice of action.

The decision didn't take much thought as Sakuro turned to face the prince, expression perfectly blank. The weight of the emperor's attention meant that Taurus had another opportunity to slander Sarasaland, but most importantly to insult their princess.

Taurus' wild grin softened fractionally, with the power back in his possession, he could afford to relax. He even sank comfortably into his father's throne, reclining airily, "You don't know about that, do you? The shame of it all. I suppose you are ignorant of your daughter's wayward activities."

"As mentioned previously, Princess Sarasaland is the pearlescent gem in Sarasaland's crown. Her virtue, modesty and wondrous jollity is a shining, glittering star that many others wish to emulate. Is this Aqualandian etiquette? Do you make a habit of wasting time with slandering?"

"Oh how _fun_," Taurus purred, "_I _get to be the one to break the news to you. Only fitting I suppose since everyone in Sarasaland is terribly disillusioned. You all seem to think upsetting me is your wisest course of action."

"You've made a myriad of mistakes today, with your most recent in thinking that Sarasaland still concerns herself with the Aqualands opinions."

"Good. Then I won't feel too bad telling you of how your daughter has been shamelessly _fucking _that _lizard_ king," Taurus laughed, speaking as airily as if he were talking about something as mundane as the weather, " She's just as big of a whore as her grandmother was back in her youth."

Sakuro reacted subtly, eyes tightening and lips pulling into a thin, dissatisfied line. Taurus would have missed it if he hadn't been watching very carefully, "Oh why that look emperor? Didn't you know?"

Taurus chuckled urbanely, "Since Sarasaland doesn't, what was it you said, 'concern herself with the Aqualands opinions' then I won't feel too bad airing out a secret held between our kingdoms. My grandfather fu—_pardon me_—_slept _with your mother, Empress Meringue. Sixtyish something odd years ago, she willingly hopped into bed with my grandfather for something as stupid as well water. Looks like it runs in the family eh? I suppose Meringue taught her granddaughter those same loose morals. Funny how things come to a complete circle."

"Lying about such things is beneath even you," Sakuro spoke through his teeth.

"I do not lie, Sakuro," Taurus was still grinning, "Ask your _mother_ if you don't believe me."

That last thread of indecency seemed to finally fray the Emperor's extensive patience. Sakuro cut Taurus a glare so ruthless, that the Aqualandian prince broke into laughter, "Oh finally. So he _does_ have emotions after all! You know what is so sad about all of this? I could have married your daughter and have made her a decent, upstanding lady. But she followed her grandmother's road and became a worthless whore fit to service the lowest trash like _lizards_. _At least_ Meringue had enough self-respect to stick with human men."

Taurus stopped his buoyant laughter, sneering with iniquitous joviality, "_Now_ I'm done with you. Take you, and your pathetic, whorish daughter and leave my sights. Consider us hostile, Emperor. _Get the hell out._"

Sakuro stared at Taurus wordlessly, blue eyes blazing and shoulders tense, "You know, once Sarasaland wished for peace and a restored treaty, but I, Emperor Sakuro wish you _would_ be so foolish as to bring bloodshed into my kingdom."

The emperor approached the throne until he stood inches from Taurus. Taurus must have felt that there was genuine peril with Sakuro's advance as he quickly rose to his feet for a confrontation. Sakuro openly scoffed, "Take a seat, you are no more a threat to me than an unhatched Yoshi egg is to a Koopa."

"Still impetuous Saku—?"

Taurus halted when Sakuro was but a breadth way. They were so close that Taurus could clearly see several different hues of blue within the emperor's irises.

"Just to set things straight," Sakuro spoke in a low growl, "I've run a kingdom longer than you've been alive _child_. My kingdom has been threatened by men twice as dangerous and twice as powerful and Sarasaland has triumphed. You are but a simple, insignificant smear hardly worthy of sharing the same air. In case you are slow or hard of hearing, Sarasaland will prosper long after you are gone. But hear me prince, insult my precious daughter and my mother _one last time_ and that will be your last breath you draw. I have ways to make useless, empty-headed little princes disappear and never return."

The court was dead silent as both men glared one another down with blistering, baleful hatred. Taurus sneered, refusing to blink, refusing to break eye contact with a man who just openly and boldly threatened him in his own court. Bolstering that speech with a cutting glare, the emperor turned on his heel and left.

As Sakuro strolled away, back unprotected and completely open, Taurus glared furiously. His silver eyes flickered to a lone figure that stood high above a balcony that loomed over the throne room.

The figure had remained hidden for the duration of the talk. Taurus motioned to the guard with the quiver of arrows on his back with a curt nod, and with a quick responding nod of his own, the archer slowly slipped after the emperor.

* * *

><p>As Sakuro stepped outside of the palace, blood rushed through his ears as his adrenaline raced through his body like a livewire. The negotiation had gone horribly wrong and Taurus had revealed himself to not only be of squalid character but perhaps even a sociopath.<p>

A man who threw around war like a taskmaster would a whip, sharp and jarring, to selfishly achieve his goals was no one who should have the complete power of a throne backing his madness. Armies, generals and war heroes were at his every will and whim.

The crunch of a brittle twig made Sakuro freeze and his blazing adrenaline tripled. The sound came from behind, as if someone were trailing him. _Hunting him._

So this was it, wasn't it? In his ire Taurus had sent someone to assassinate him. As a child learning history, Sakuro had always wondered if the slain leaders of the past knew their death was coming.

Did they willingly carry on, knowing their end was imminent? Or were they completely clueless of the venomous plots brewing and conspiring against them?

Sakuro wondered how history would portray him; would he be the overly optimistic king that blindly and stupidly trusted a bold-faced, deceptive Aqualandian Prince? Or would he be shown as brave, courageously facing his death head on for the sake of his people?

Sakuro closed his eyes, an ominous requiem lingering over him like a cloud of death. Drawing strength to himself, he slowly turned to face his would be murderer. If he was to die, then he would do it bravely facing his foe. He wouldn't die as a coward.

_Chisana_, _I hope King Bowser holds true to his word to protect you. Don't worry my child, you won't be alone. Your Uncle, Grandmother and cousin will take care of you. I only wish I had more time..._

Face set in stone, Sakuro turned to meet his destiny head on. His mind raced for a few witty words to throw out before he was slain. Instead of glittering blades and spears, Sakuro nearly jumped out of his skin when a loud, friendly, rambunctious, "_Heya Emperor_! There you are! I knew you'd be around here somewhere!"

The emperor nearly had a heart attack; first the fear of looming, stealthy assassins and now startling booming voices. If someone didn't off him soon, just the sheer stress of _everything _was going to kill him. Sakuro discreetly placed a hand over his heart, trying to calm its irregular, panicked thumping.

It was a pleasant surprise that his pursuers were friendly-looking Canines—if you could consider the wild honey eyes and feral smiles as friendly.

The first was a tall woman with a long, wild mass of ebony hair and a curvaceous build. If she didn't have such a crazy, bloodthirsty grin marring her features she could be attractive.

"Lady Kitsune...?" Sakuro was still breathless from the thought of an imminent death, "What are you...?"

"Long time no see _Sa-ku_-_ro_," Kitsune grinned good-naturedly and jabbed him in the shoulder. The blow was hard enough to make Sakuro stagger.

Sakuro frowned, realizing he would soon have a bruise there. Kitsune either didn't care, or didn't notice, probably the former, "It's good to see you! I came here to hash somethings out with Aqualands," she smirked, "they did assault an heir to Land's End, but most importantly they assaulted _my_ pup. As if I'd let that slide."

"I'm afraid I came for the same reasons," the male Canine was _tall_. Tall, as in if he stood beside the monstrous King Bowser, he would _not_ look diminutive.

The newcomer eyed the emperor before smiling kindly, lacking the bloodthirsty element most Canine smiles held, "Ah, you must be the emperor of Sarasaland huh? Nice to meet you, I'm Lobos. The Clan Alpha of the Western Land's End territories."

After studying the newcomer's features, too many similarities suddenly jumped out at the Emperor, "...You _must_ be Lord Wolfebane's father, he looks just like you."

Lobos smiled broadly; they even had the same aluminous, infectious smile. He and Wolfe shared the same powerful build, towering height and the same comely facial features. The only defining difference was that Lobos was gigantic and _able _to grow a beard, "Yes, Wolfe's my pup, and this—"

Lobos smirked mischievously as his golden eyes glittered. He reached for Kitsune, "—beautiful, vivacious woman is my wife."

Kitsune snorted, dodging the overfriendly arm, "_Please._ We ain't hitched. Ignore this idiotic lug. Apparently after all these years he's _still_ trying to get some."

_Get some_? Get some _what_? Sakuro wasn't quite sure he wanted that question answered. Lobos batted his eyelashes as he held a hand over his wounded heart, "_Must _you be so cold to me, woman? I live to hear the sound of your melodious voice and to taste the sweetness of your smile."

Kitsune rolled her eyes, and pinched the bridge of her nose, "_Idiot_. I'm sure this is the last place you want to be, Sakuro. Say, I have an idea. How about we hitch a ride in your carriage together? We'll head the same direction until we gotta break ways, sound good?"

Still unusually insipid, Sakuro numbly nodded; he was smart enough to realize offered protection when he heard it. He walked with Kitsune and Lobos, barely realizing when both Canines flanked him on either side like personal bodyguards.

Sakuro swallowed, ignoring his parched throat, "How...? How did you find me?"

"Your scent _duh_," Kitsune smirked, "You're the only Highlander I know who smells like sandalwood and books. Still the biggest _nerd_, I see."

"No I mean...how did you know when I would...?"

"Oh I get what you mean," Kitsune grinned, "A_ certain_ Koopa King thought it would be best if we met in the Aqualands together. You know, as disgruntled parents or something. My kid was attacked within these lands and your girl was assaulted by the crown prince."

So King Bowser had sent the Canines after him—to save his _ass _more like it. Bowser had been wily enough to find an appropriate party to infiltrate the Aqualand borders without raising an alarm—sending a band of his own Darklandian soldiers would have been too suspicious—and the Canines wishing to smooth things out was reasonable enough.

The Canines were well-known to be impetuous, so a spontaneous, sudden appearance wouldn't be unwarranted nor unusual for them.

And that's what this sounded like; they suddenly wanted to meet about their heir being attacked and the Aqualands allowed it; the Canines held no ill will and their motives checked out.

_Well played, King Koopa. Even after all the trouble I've put him through, he still helps me...Was I wrong about him? Perhaps I think far too low of him..._

Every so often, a lingering band of Aqualandian guards would appear. They watched the royals leave with hostile, blank stares that seemed soulless and cold.

Sakuro was positive that he wouldn't have left here alive without the two Canine alphas. Kitsune and Lobos watched the guards they passed with varying expressions.

Kistune's demeanor was hostile and fearless; her golden eyes remained narrowed as Lobos remained perfectly cool, almost genial as he nodded to the guards.

Lobos was positive none of the silly Fishhead guards would be dumb enough to get into a fight with a lumbering, muscular Canine warrior who had a massive spiked club strapped to his back.

The sight of the shimmering, ominous spears and brandished swords made the emperor's stomach twist; was he supposed to have been skewered by one of their blades?

Sakuro knew the only reason he was still breathing was that by some miraculous event or through King Bowser's planning, Kitsune and Lobos found him and were all but safely escorting him back to his carriage.

Sakuro never thought he'd be so happy to see his carriage, his driver again. A wave of relief soaked through his entire being as he realized that this would be a trip he would return from.

Toss' head popped up and at the sight of his approaching emperor, he glowed with elation. Two large Chows idled beside the carriage, peering up at the approach of their masters. Toss was so happy at his emperor's return that he lost his professionalism and darted over, "_Emperor Sakuro_! You're—!"

"Toss, will you open the doors? We'll be having a little more company than expected," Sakuro motioned to the two Canines alphas beside him.

"O-Of course Sire!" With a bow, Toss darted away and opened the door for the royals. The second Sakuro slipped into the carriage, exhaustion hit him like a freight train. He sank bonelessly into the fresh upholstery and breathed a deep, rattling breath of relief.

Kitsune and Lobos entered seconds later and it wasn't too soon when the carriage began to bounce, rocking over the gravel road. Sakuro closed his eyes, hoping to nab a few hours of rest, but wasn't granted that liberty just yet.

The collar of his robe was roughly grabbed and he was shoved against the velvet walls roughly. When his eyes snapped open, he had a face full of snarling, pissed-off Kitsune borrowing down on him.

Lobos frowned, "My Stars, I've been hitting on you _all _day and _he_ gets the rough-kinky treatment? _Tch_!"

"You stupid, idiotic Highlander," Kitsune growled, focusing all her furious energies on Sakuro, "What the _hell_ where you thinking walking into that obvious-ass ambush!? _Huh!?_ You've got _ten_ seconds to explain shit to me before I whip your hoity toity ass in your own fancy carriage. I barely managed to get here in time, you're lucky Nuttsy is one helluva fast runner! Do you know what they would have done to you!?"

"Kitsune," despite the too real threat of getting his ass handed to him on a platter by a _very_ capable woman, Sakuro spoke calmly, tiredly.

"They might have tortured you, beat you stupid, or even beheaded you in a public square!"

"Kitsune."

"I should beat you 'til your brain starts working again," she snarled, golden eyes narrowing further. The longer she thought about it, the more she grew angrier and the tighter her grip squeezed "Smacking you up a bit _would_ make me feel better..."

"Kitsune..."

"Those stupid Fishfaces would have cut your head off and mailed it to your daughter. Do you think Meringue's heart could take that!? _You_ may be okay with gambling your life away, but I ain't. I promised Rosie I'd watch over you. You and Girly. And I'd be _damned_ if I let you get killed."

"Kitsune..."

"_What!?"_ she finally snapped, "What? Sakuro? _What!?_ What have you got to say for your frickin' stupidity!?"

"Thank you," he smiled softly.

Kitsune stared at him wordlessly, brows furrowing in confusion. Her mouth worked silently as her mind tried to come up with a suiting answer. Finally she glared at him, half confused and half furious, "You're _thanking _me for manhandling your ass?"

Lobos laughed, "No Kitty. He's happy that you've got his back. And that you have the interest of his daughter and mother in mind. He knows good and well that he had openly walked into an ambush. No need to beat him over the head about it. The poor man looks as pale as a boo. Can't blame him really."

Finally Kitsune eased off. She let go of his collar and slowly slipped back into her proper seat. Though her anger had cooled, she still didn't look anywhere near happy.

Kitsune nodded curtly, "You're welcome Emperor," then she shot a glare at Lobos, "And don't call me _that_."

"_Oh?"_ Lobos wagged his eyebrows playfully, "you _used_ to like when I called you that."

"I don't anymore, Idiot. Quit being so damn desperate, Sakuro has to think you're the saddest man in existence," she huffed.

"Then make me the happiest man in existence and say you'll be mine?" Lobos purred, slowly slinking in Kitsune's direction.

"Get over yourself."

"Over? How about you get _under_ me?"

"How about you get under my _fist_."

As the two Canines continued to quarrel, flirt, or whatever they were doing, Sakuro released a deep sigh, slumping against the comfortable seating. He closed his eyes and cherished the idea that he would return home, he could see his mother again, and he could see his beloved, precious daughter.

"..._You watch your damn hands_! You try_ anything_ funny and I'll give you a swirly."

"Oh come on Kitty, don't pretend as if you don't _like_ what these hands can do to you."

Sakuro released a sigh; he was so relieved that the weird Canine flirt tactics weren't even annoying. He closed his eyes, completely exhausted.

* * *

><p>As the Emperor's carriage and the two accompanying Chows raced towards the setting red and orange crisscrossed horizon, Taurus stood at his balcony. Arms crossed and eyes narrowed, he stood beside an archer. Both men watched the Emperor flee their borders.<p>

The archer turned to look at his prince, "We could always have the guards go after them. Apprehending them would be no trouble at all."

"No, the time has passed," Taurus replied, eyes steely, "We had our window of opportunity and missed it. I certainly wasn't expecting those Canine savages to show up for a 'meeting.'"

"No one did," the archer growled, "And by the way Sir, the colonel has informed me that the Canine 'meeting' was complete Bloopershit. They didn't come here to even discuss anything. It was a ruse."

"Ah, so the Canines came to save the emperor," Taurus purred thoughtfully, "Intriguing. Too bad, it certainly would have been quite a wondrous surprise to have mailed the emperor's head to Princess Sarasaland as a nice gift."

The archer grinned, "Or to have decorated our outside wall as a souvenir."

Taurus laughed, "The emperor _does _have nice, long hair doesn't he? His skull would have been such a pretty addition."

Both Aqualandians laughed as they watched the last of the carriage disappear into the blazing, fuchsia skyline.

"So now what Sir?" As the archer turned to face his prince, his silver quiver glowed under the dying sunlight, "We simply _let_ them go?"

Taurus smirked, "This is just the beginning. Now we finally have the means to really get them. Come, let's have some tea. Mother's expecting our company."

The archer bowed as Taurus shot one last glare at the disappearing carriage before he turned on his heel and reentered the palace.

* * *

><p>Darkness had bled into the fresh hours of midnight when the first sighting's of Emperor Sakuro's carriage near the Sarasalandian border were learned. The guards at the isolated outposts cried out, rushing with a mixture of dread, relief and fear as they raced to see their emperor.<p>

Meanwhile miles and several golden seas of sands away, the Sarasalandian palace pulsed with anxiety, fear and the air smelt pungently of dried sweat and stale air. Not a single councilman had retired home for the evening.

All of the council had gathered in a remote common study, staring blankly at walls or pacing agitatedly. Maids had been hard at work through the long hours of night, keeping the councilors fed and happy with a steady diet of lavender tea and fresh, sweet bread pastries.

Zero had been pretending to brush up on the history of Sarasalandian economic policies, but the entire night he did little more than stare at the pages, unseeing the words. His father, the High Protectorate Salini had been pacing a path into the floor, features closed in a stern fold of frown lines and furrowed brows.

A servant approached the agitated High Protectorate. Knowing good and well that his patience was exceptionally short today, the servant met him with a formal bow before swiftly announcing the return of the emperor's carriage. The High Protectorate nearly stumbled, before summoning his son and the other councilors into action.

Salini leaned forward, cloaks of shadows filtrating his somber visage, "Have you informed the guards?"

"Of course Sir, they're already approaching the front gates."

"And King Apricotto is informed?"

"Yes Sir, just as you instructed. The Queen is resting well and Princess Sarasaland is soundly asleep as well."

Salini's breath grew shallow, "Is the King..._well?_"

The servant smiled, "The border patrol reports that the Emperor is alive."

"Good," Salini released a breath of reprieve, of relief that didn't show up in his stern features, "Have the physician at the door. Get a move on lad."

It wasn't even moments later when the councilors rushed through the palace and flew outside in a flurry of fluttering robes, sweat and wheezing breath. Already a small procession of guards had gathered, awaiting the approaching carriage.

The High Protectorate shoved and pushed his way to the front of the group, noting that both King Apricotto and Lady Angora were present.

Angora, who had always been pragmatic and level-headed was openly weeping as she waited curbside with unusually vulnerable, wet eyes. She hurriedly dabbed a handkerchief at a glistening trail of mascara leaking down her pale cheek.

King Apricotto appeared the most out of sorts, it was unnerving that the usually juvenile, mischievous king looked so somber. Zero squeezed into a spot beside his father, peering at the horizon where the emperor's carriage was clearly in sight.

The carriage was flanked by a fleet of Sarasalandian border patrol and the moment the carriage pulled to a halt in front of the palace, Toadux spearhead an armed brigade and approached the carriage. Stonefaced, Toadux's jaw clenched as he mentally prepared himself for whatever horror lay within the emperor's carriage.

He opened the door and for a terrifying moment everyone held their breaths, praying, hoping that the Emperor was _truly _okay. Alive and well were _not_ synonymous. Sakuro stepped out, looking whole, unscathed and most importantly alive.

Lady Angora emitted a relieved sob, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears as Apricotto and the royal physician approached the Emperor.

Apricotto pulled his older brother into a hug, laughing and smiling once again. The physician saw no blood, saw no life endangering injuries as Sakuro confirmed that not a single hand had been placed on his person.

The physician blinked, peering at the king's shoulder and saw a purpling bruise, "Milord, what is _this_?"

It was the spot where Kitsune had amiably punched the _shit_ out of him. But he wouldn't let them know that. Sakuro kept a perfectly straight face, " Perhaps I bumped into column earlier today. Memory escapes me."

"His majesty is known for his grace and poise...How odd..." the physician hummed.

"Hey, can the Emperor go ahead and rest or _what!_?" Apricotto bellowed, "The man looks tired! He has to be when dealing with the stupid Fishies!"

"Very well," The physician nodded, "Despite fatigue, His Majesty has a clean bill of health. You may go ahead and rest for the evening."

Sakuro nodded tiredly, "Thank you."

Apricotto wasted no time, quickly leading his brother into the palace. Sarasaland let out a collective sigh of relief; the Emperor was fine, withstanding the dark circles under his eyes and his unkempt robes and tousled locks. The High Protectorate sighed deeply, "Sire...I cannot begin to express how _good_ it is to see you..."

"Likewise Councilor..." Sakuro smiled very weakly, "I'm sure everyone wants to know every last detail about the meeting, but I find my strength depleted. Perhaps we can talk about this tomorrow?"

"Absolutely Sire," Salini smiled tiredly himself, "Rest well."

Sakuro and Apricotto checked on their resting mother, who was sound asleep and according to the yawning, bleary-eyed medic on duty, she was doing just fine.

Sakuro kissed his mother's curly, white head of hair before turning towards his daughter's room. Apricotto smiled warmly, even though it was obvious that he too was exhausted, "Go on up and see Daisy. I know you really want to."

"I shall," Sakuro's expression became sincere, "Apricotto so many thanks are in order. Thanks for coming...Thanks for watching over Mother and my dear _Chisana_. Thanks for not letting Daisy know the truth about all of this. I didn't want her to worry. She has enough going on as is. Thanks for-"

Apricotto waved away the gratitude, "We're brothers, this is nothing! Honestly I'd rather do stuff like this then look over boring treaties and paper work! _Blech!_ Besides it give me a reason to take a miniature vacation. See your daughter and rest, Sak. I'll catch you tomorrow. I'm really glad to have you back Bro."

"I'm glad to be with my family again," Sakuro smiled warmly.

"Don't pull this stupid crap again, right? No more?"

Sakuro laughed weakly, "No more. I promise."

"Good," Apricotto's smile wasn't as brilliant as it usually was, but it was pretty close, "'cause _I'm_ the wildcard in _this_ family. It's my job!"

Sakuro laughed for the first time the entire day with true mirth, "Stars know that's the truth..."

The Mushroom king delivered an amicable clap to his brother's back before dragging himself to a very welcoming and much needed bed. Sakuro quietly peeled the door to his daughter's room open and smiled softly.

The soft glow of light seeping from the sleeping Fireflower lit his daughter's features with a beautiful, soft orange radiance. Daisy slept curled on her side, thick mahogany curls splashed over her pillow like scattered rose petals. She looked so peaceful and relaxed.

_She looks just like Rose._

Sakuro took a knee beside her bed and lightly touched her hair, taking in her smooth, relaxed features as she breathed softly. Her peaceful energy must have transferred to him as he felt himself finally giving into the temptation of relaxation.

All day he had been ridden with worry, fear and turbulent anger and yet only a few seconds at his daughter's bedside could cure his ailments. His family had always been the elixir to his problems.

The emperor closed his eyes, resting the side of his cheek against his daughter's sweet scented comforter, thinking that he'd rest his eyes for_ just_ a moment.

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><p>The following morning I woke up, rubbing sleep from my eyes. Firefly was awake, sucking and slurping at a bottle of plantfood baby formula beside him. I sat up, stretching and cracking several vertebrae in the process. I blinked, realizing something warm was resting on my bed.<p>

Huh? It was Father.

Father slept quietly, head pillowed atop his arms as his torso lay on the bed. When did he get back from his meeting? Father was always up at the crack of dawn.

Wow, he must have been really tired; he went to sleep still wearing his crown and monarch robes. I scooted towards him and softly shook his shoulder, "...Dad? Dad? _Padree_?"

His eyes opened with a drowsy reluctance and with a blink, Father peered up at me blearily, "..._Chisana_?"

"Good morning Dad, how are you?" I beamed, smoothing his tussled dark locks, "When did you get back?"

He sat up, appearing semi-sleepy, "Yesterday night. The meeting ran a_ little_ longer than I expected. I...must have fallen asleep here. The councilors will be expecting me soon, I need to check on your grandmother, your Uncle, cousin, Mario and Luigi will be expecting—"

"Yet again, Sakuro 'All work and no play' has returned."

Uncle Apricotto was at my door grinning like a blitty in cream. He ambled over smiling far too largely, "Sak, chill out. I've talked to the council and they're not going to expect you to say or do anything until at _least_ three pm."

Father squinted, "What do you mean...?"

"They understand, Bro," Unc smirked, "You had one heck of a night and _maybe _I convinced them that everyone had a long night and that we all needed our eight hours of sleep. No one's expecting you present until later today. Kick back and relax for a few hours, it's still ten am."

Father emitted a surprisingly human sounding groan, "My back _is _unspeakably sore and I need a shower..."

"That's what you get for sleeping like that!" Unc laughed, "I checked on you earlier, but you looked so peaceful sleeping on your little girl's bed. Oh by the way, I took a picture 'cause Mom thought it was the cutest thing ever."

Father frowned, "_What_ did you just say?"

"Now up and at 'em," Uncle intentionally ignored him, "Hey, I've got an idea! Let's have a light lunch together! What do you say?"

Father shot a protesting glare at Unc. But Unc must have expected it, "No kings, no Mario brothers, just our fam. I'll have Peachie Pie join us, 'kay? How about we make this for twelve? That's still two more hours of sleep you can get."

"Very well," Father slowly stood up and frowned, holding his aching back, "I'll—"

A loud, thunderous roar rattled the ceilings and made a few layers of plaster fall from the ceiling, "**_MARIO!? WHA_**—**_!? WHAT THE FLAMING, FARTING HELL ARE _****YOU****_ DOING HERE!? YOU KNOW WHAT!? SEEING YOUR FAT FACE JUST PISSED ME OFF. I'M GOING TO GLUE YOUR HEAD TO YOUR ASS PLUM SCUMB!"_**

Father and Uncle shared an inquisitive look. I sweat dropped, "Uh oh, I uh...get the_ impression_ that Bowser and Mario have bumped into each other."

Alabaster suddenly stuck his head into my room with a wicked, crazy grin, "_Oh no_ Emperor! King Bowser and Mario look as if they're going to fight! This is _horrible. _I certainly hope Mario isn't _killed._ Whatever should we _do_?"

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><p>Ultrra: XD That Toad is a mess!<p>

Alice: Lol yeah is he. X)

Ultrra: Hey! I saw Nuttsy this chapter! :) I knew someone would ride him eventually and it's even better that Kitsune, the big bosslady did!

Alice: Nuttsy has his quirks but he's still an awesome Chow. X) Also this chapter we 'saw' Grammy. Does anyone know where we 'saw' her ;)

Ultrra: Hmm...

Alice: Why don't you guys leave a review? Thanks for reading another chapter (bows) Seeya in the next and can't to hear what you guys and gals think! ^_^


	29. Claws: New understandings

Alice: Hey everyone! Thanks for the kind reviews, favorites, reads, pms, everything! I know I take _awhile_ to update, but believe me, it's only to ensure quality! ^_^

Ultrra: (mutters) So you say...

Alice:...What was that?

Ultrra: Lol I said, 'take all day' if you need to. XP

Alice: Lol good. Anyways, one of the most recent reviews touched me. I'm glad my story can make someone's day, even if it's just a simple laugh, or a way to relax from a bad day. :) I just want to let _you_ know anonymous reviewer that bullying is something only insecure jerks do and sorry for my language but it's a total punkass move.

Ultrra: (smirks) Whoa! Alicestar!

Alice: Also, things _will _get better. You'll look back many years from now and realize how _stupid _they were. Also _everyone_ at some point is teased/picked on. I remember in middle school, some _idiot _tried to make fun of my name.

Ultrra: (blinks) Alice? You can make fun of the name _Alice!? _Lol wtf?

Alice: Yeah, see, it's always over something _stupid_. Anyways let me tell you a mini story, in my freshman year of highschool, this guy who I've never spoken a word to, just up and dumps a drink all over my shirt.

Ultrra: (squints) Yeah I remember that. He was lucky I wasn't there or I would have kicked his ass.

Alice: ^_^ Now, I'm not saying you should do this and it's _completely not kosher at all._ And in fact, I advise you _not _to do what I did. XDD But after he did that, I calmly stood up and smacked the hell out of him. Like, street fighter shoryuken style. XD Like Falcon punch style.

Ultrra: XDDD LOL! (spits out drink) LMAO! XD

Alice: I got into _sooooooooo_ much trouble school wise. XDDDD But, he never messed with me AGAIN. Lol, _no one _did. But when I explained everything to my parents, my dad was like 'hell yeah' and my mom was like 'sweetie, I see why you did that, but don't do that again PLEASE'. Anyways, just letting you know, that you're not alone and things will get better. Hope this update makes your day and everyone else's a tad sweeter. :)

Ultrra: The only warnings for this chapter are language and immature, silly humor up ahead. You know, the stuff you guys are used to. X)

Alice: Bowser, Apricotto and Alabaster write themselves lol! And I hope you all enjoy! :)

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

* * *

><p>Bowser's furious curses were ornery and articulated so <em>violently<em> that we could hear him from several floors down. We didn't waste another second when Father, Unc, Peach and I raced up the stairwell.

I was impressed that Father and Uncle, who were middle-aged, were able to keep up as we dashed frantically up several spiraling sets of staircases.

"_Oh Stars_, I'm _never _running this much in my life _again_!" Unc panted heavily, gasping and sweating.

This trek was chaos: petticoats were flashing, royal robes and dresses were flying everywhere, Unc was wheezing, and Peach's long tresses have gotten caught in my mouth several times.

"_Thank you_ for tasting my hair," Peach was smiling, but the narrow eyes and her nice-nasty tone intended sarcasm, "These beach waves will take _days_ to perfect again..."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah 'cause that's what I do Peach. I _willingly_ try to eat your hair."

It wouldn't be long before we reached the guest suite floor. When we were one floor below, there was a sudden violent thud that shook the floor and made us hold onto nearby furniture for dear life.

"_Wowzers_!" Uncle exclaimed, standing in a door arch, "What was _that_!?"

Father frowned, peering at the ceiling as if he had the ability to see through walls, "That didn't sound good and we certainly must put an end to whatever is occurring, the empress is trying to rest."

We peddled upstairs and into the hallway where Mario was rubbing the back of his head sheepishly and Bowser was yelling crude, incomprehensible curses, flailing his arms like a lunatic.

Something had Bowser so flustered and so upset that he was beginning to spew tendrils of embers from his mouth. Zero and Luigi stood a ways from the quarreling twosome, neither wishing to become involved. At our approach, Luigi and Zero faced us. Salini's bored, stolid expression lightened fractionally when he saw Peach, "Princess Peach, you look as fair as ever."

Surprised, Peach blinked, "Oh! Why thank you!"

"What happened here?" Father asked.

"I heard a loud thud-a!" Luigi exclaimed, "Then I stepped out of my room-a and found...uh..._this-a_."

"_What the hell was that for_!?" Bowser roared furiously.

"My mistake..." Mario whispered.

"Your _mistake_!?" Bowser repeated incredulously, "Yeah you're absolutely right, _Potbelly plumber_. It _is_ your bad! And now I'm going to—"

Father quickly interceded, smoothly stepping between the two legends and creating a physical barrier. While Bowser fumed, glaring down at Mario heatedly, Peach tapped my shoulder and pointed at a spot just behind Bowser.

There was a huge, crumbling crater in one of the walls. Peach covered her mouth as my jaw dropped; was Bowser_ punched _through the wall!? That would explain why he was covered in a thin, crumbling film of plaster and why he was so furious.

Father peered between Mario and Bowser, then stared at the gigantic hole in the wall and asked with all the patience in the world, "What is going on here?"

"Well..." Mario began quietly, "I..."

"_You!_" Alabaster cried, angrily jabbing his finger at Mario. I was confused, where did _he_ come from? Did he run up the stairs behind us? He was just in my room a few minutes ago.

A crowd of servants stood nearby, gaping at the spectacle as Alabaster shoved his way to the front, "Isn't it so _obvious _what happened here!?"

Uncle Apricotto blinked owlishly, "Uh, actually it really _isn't_."

"I've got this," Zero spoke inflectionlessly, as if he were delivering a report, "I was in the hall when the whole event happened. Bowser and Mario left their respective rooms at the same time and bumped into each other. The moment they saw each other, King Bowser encroached Mario, yelling and carrying on and since King Bowser got too close, Mario reacted, sending him through the wall."

Father peered at Mario, "Is this true?"

Mario nodded, "Yes..."

"And then..." Alabaster suddenly spun around, eyes blazing as he pointed incriminatingly at Mario, "Mario, became a power hungry _jerk_."

Mario and Bowser both looked dually surprised and both spoke at the same time," ..._What_?"

Bowser shrugged noncommittally, "Yeah, but Mario's _always_ been a jerk. Why is this time any different?"

"_What!?_ _Mama Mia!"_ Mario looked exasperated, "You're the one-a kidnapping princesses and ruining our-a parties and _I'm_ the jerk!?"

"And an ugly one _too_," Bowser grinned sinisterly.

They exchanged heated glares once more but Father kept them both apart as Alabaster continued.

"The '_perfect hero_," Alabaster even made air quotes, " tried to 'get the jump' on the poor, unsuspecting King Bowser! So when King Bowser was least expecting it..._POW!_" Alabaster made half of the people jump with the unexpected sound effect, "A flying fist of fury and then the King slammed through the wall and made a crater!"

Unc rubbed his chin, "Well, that _is_ a pretty big hole..."

"Well isn't this enough?" Alabaster whispered dramatically, trying to set a mood, "It's obvious that the king is trying to turn a new leaf but people like _him._" He pointed accusingly at Mario again, "Like the power hungry jerk _Mario _just keep on draggin' him back to the dark side!"

Mario scratched the back of his head, appearing confused, "Where is all of this-a hostility coming from?"

"I'm beginning to wonder this myself," Father muttered to himself, though he cast a knowing glance towards Peach.

Alabaster nodded, "It's true! But this situation is easy to fix, we simply move the lovely, gorgeous Princess Peach closer to the protection of a _real_ man, a real Toadsto—"

I released a deep sigh and pinched the bridge of my nose. _Okaaaaay_. I for one see _right _through Alabaster's lame agenda: try and spin some dim-witted story against Mario, and then somehow, he hoped to earn a chance to be closer to Peach. _Or something_. Honestly I was confused by this whole thing.

I crossed my arms, glaring at Alabaster, "You know _what_? I think you _might_ be stretching the truth a _little."_

Zero actually laughed, "Your agenda is as transparent as a boo. And that's Star damn transparent."

Father turned to Bowser, and something told me that he too knew Alabaster was being just a _tad _bit dishonest, "Would you like to tell your side of the story, Lord Bowser?"

Bowser peered at me for a flicker of second, so quickly I nearly missed it. He crossed his arms stubbornly and looked away, "I don't have _anything_ to say. I saw Mari-_ho_ and that's that."

Father must have thought further interrogation on Bowser's end was pointless and turned to Mario, who still hadn't stopped looking guilty, "Mario, I'm sure you wouldn't be against providing your account for us?"

"Well...honestly...the councilor's story was-a correct," Zero's eyes narrowed just the slightest when he spoke, "I was startled-a by Bowser's sudden appearance. One moment-a he was in my face, yelling and screaming..."

Uncle Apri nodded his head agreeably, "Yeah, we could hear him all the way downstairs!"

Mario chuckled nervously, "And when he got _this _close. Close enough-a that I could see the scales on-a his face. I reacted-a and sent him through a wall..."

Bowser grunted, glaring away from everything and everyone. We all gaped; wow, for once Bowser wasn't the party responsible for a fight? Father was too refined to drop his jaw, but he was certainly surprised. Zero snorted scathingly as Peach blinked before stepping in, "Well, it was an accident, right, MarMar?"

"What a _cute _pet name," Zero snarled under his breath with all the acidity of piranha snot.

Bowser covered his mouth, snorting back a laugh, "'_Marmar_!?' _Oh Stars_ that's so _lame."_

"Yes." Mario shot the king Koopa a stern look before beseeching to Father again, "I forgot-a Bowser was here. He suddenly appeared-a, yelling and screaming and then I accidentally…uh…"

Bowser's eyes sharpened to thin slits as Alabaster jumped in, "Accidentally punched him through a wall!? Do you know how hard the custodians work around here!? And yet you just up and did _this!?"_

Father turned to Bowser, "Do you agree with Mario's account, Lord Bowser?"

"Yeah," Bowser grunted none too happily, "For once _I _didn't throw the first blow."

Alabaster laughed with dark jubilance, "Oh how the _mighty_ have fallen! Emperor what shall we do with Mario? Scalping? Throw him in boiling oil? I say throw him into jail to _rot."_

While everyone stared at Alabaster as if he grew a second head, Bowser shrugged noncommittally; hey, if Mario went to jail for the rest of his life over something stupid, who was _he_ to care?

"Sorry Emperor," Mario removed his hat and bowed apologetically, "I know how much-a stress you're under already. I won't be anymore-a trouble..."

"_Damn right_ you won't," Bowser snorted.

"The king's right!" Alabaster bobbed his head agreeably and pointed with each word to punctuate his point, "Ya damn right you won't!"

Alabaster's antics had Unc laughing and Bowser smirking for a split second. However, vulgar language always rubbed Father the wrong way, and this time wasn't any different. He shot Alabaster a disapproving glare; wow, where have I seen _that _look before?

My whole life, _that's_ where.

"Alabaster..." Father frowned.

"Okay, sorry Emperor. No more. But seriously, I have an idea about that tor—er _punishing_ Mario thing. Let's just stick a nail up his—_mmph!_" and with the straightest, most professional visage intact, Father slapped his hand over Alabaster's mouth and continued to speak as if this was perfectly normal behavior.

Father turned to Mario, "I believe I've come to understand what happened here. All dramatics and..." Father peered at Alabaster with a stern look that made the young servant recoil slightly, "_embellishing _aside, it's no problem to have the wall fixed and you certainly are the last person to add to my problems. So long as this does not happen again, this can easily be pardoned."

"Thanks…" Mario murmured softly.

As Unc Apricotto and Peach were trying to soothe a moderately irritate Bowser, and Father was tied up with scolding Alabaster, an older servant materialized at my side.

She bowed before leaning forward, eyes twinkling with mischief as she cupped a hand over her mouth to muffle her words, "_Psst!_ Princess! Pertaining to the betting pool, I've got your standings."

"Yeah?" I whispered back, watching the exchange between Bowser and my family. Uncle, for some odd reason was trying to give him a bear hug and Bowser was violently rejecting him. Peach yet again was mediating both parties, making sure Bowser didn't end up killing her dad.

"You didn't win the Koopatube pool, but you did bet on the king being punched through a wall," the older maid nodded, "I'll bring your winnings later, Miss."

And then, what was the _worst_ thing that could happen?

_That's right_. From all the way across the hall, Bowser _suddenly _looked up from his conversation and peered at me with a look that was dually dubious and aggravated.

His patience was suddenly very thin as he grabbed Unc and hoisted him out of the way before stomping over towards me. His loud, clambering approach quickly drew everyone's attention and set us at center stage.

Bowser stopped his loud tromping when he wasn't more than a foot away, gnashing his fangs together as smoke began to rise from his nostrils, "I'm sorry. But _what_ did I just _hear_!?"

Sometimes life hands you lemons. And then there's days like _these_ where life chucks seventy mile per hour fastball lemons at you and_ laughs_.

Yes, _fastball lemons_.

I was stuck between trying not to laugh and trying not to scream; how could I possibly cover my own ass!? Bowser's amazing Koopa hearing has backfired _terribly. _

I was torn because part of me wanted to apologize and explain that the bet was for nothing but fun. In fact, it's been a long-standing, silly tradition that the maids here in the palace always have some kind of a fun bet going on: what color shoes will Councilman Wing wear on Tuesday?

How many drumsticks will Councilman Gordo stuff in his mouth before lunch break is over? What shampoo will Emperor Sakuro use for his illustrious raven locks to make his _sheen _so _enviable_?

See? The bets were silly and lighthearted! One bet counted how many times I would trip, slip and stumble at a Mushroom kingdom luncheon—the maids bet twenty but I _only_ tripped _twelve times _that day.

I wanted to tell Bowwy that this wasn't something that should blow apart his ego. _But_ the other part of me wanted to shrug and tell him straight up that it was a damn good bet.

"Uh...Sorry?" My voice rose at the end in an unattractive squeak and that seemed to only make him more furious. His teeth made an audible clink when he ground them together and his face flushed a red so brilliant that cherries would be envious.

"_My Stars_," Unc whispered _too loudly, _"He looks like he's _hemorrhaging_!"

Bowser snorted a thick clot of smoke from his nostrils before bellowing, "_Oh? _I see how it is! So you bet that Plumber _Toilet Scum_ would kick my ass _huh!_? Well just so you _know, _he pulled a friggin' cheapshot and hit me when I wasn't expecting it! _So there_! It doesn't even _count!_ I hope you enjoy your...your..._blood money!"_

With Bowser glowering, looming above me like a temperamental volcano, I knew that nothing I said would make him settle down, "Uh…?"

"Oh what!? Now you can't _talk!_?" he snapped, " You sure did a lot of talking when you placed that _bet!"_

"Bowser, just let me expla—"

"And since _when _did _Mario _become your _hero!?"_ With each passing second, more and more clouds of smoke began to pour from his nose and mouth and his face was nearly neon red. Maybe Unc was right; this could _not _be healthy.

"Oh dear..." Luigi muttered, nervously biting at his gloved fingers.

"He's not going to calm down," Arms crossed, Zero stated the obvious.

"Bowser, will you _chill_? It's not that serious!" I sighed, "Look...It was just a fun thing..."

Bowser appeared incredulous, "Him punching_ me_ through a wall is _fun_!?"

I threw my hands up at that point, because no matter what I said, he was _not _going to listen, "Bowser, wha—that was _totally_ out of context!"

Teeth bared, Bowser's face slowly flushed a deep red; whether from anger or from humiliation, or maybe even a happy blend of both, he snarled, "_Oh_? So you think he can kick _my_ ass? Well then I'll show you what I think of _that!_ I'm going to kick his ass through _two_ walls. And then sit on him. Because it'll make me _happy._ And then you can see how much of a _fun thing _it is!_"_

Peach stepped forward, "Now, now King Bowser...let's be rational about this...we can have a nice, delicious cup of tea and talk things over, yes?"

But Bowser was _so_ beyond rational. With a guttural, reverberating growl, his gaze narrowed upon Mario with predatory intent. Bowser snarled deeply, popping and loosening his knuckles in preparation for a fist fight. Bowser quickly made a beeline for his biggest adversary, eyes bright and swirling with rage.

I raised my hand, trying to reach for him, "Bowser!"

"You might want to stand back," Zero replied, "I don't think he's listening at all. In fact we _both _know he isn't."

And in the face of all the building turmoil, Alabaster shrugged nonchalantly, "Hey, let's be real here, it was a good bet! The truth smarts sometimes."

"_Alabaster_!" I hissed through my teeth, "You are _not _helping!"

But Bowser wasn't having any of that. His pride had been assaulted and he had plans on making Mario pay for his bruised ego. Mario motioned for Father and Unc to take a few steps back and stand behind him; a few fists were going to be thrown and the two kings shouldn't be anywhere near a brawl.

Bowser approached Mario with all the fury and ill intent of a typhoon. The king snarled loudly, sending a gigantic, furious fist with Mario's name all over it.

But the famed hero dodged with a practiced ease; Mario certainly was fast but Bowser's punches seemed to be _completely_ off their mark. With one more wild swing from the king, Mario ducked the errant blow and with an effortlessness that had been honed from years of fighting, he returned a powerful punch of his own.

Unlike Bowser's wild, uninhibited attacks, Mario's punch was perfectly accurate and sent the gigantic king flying. Bowser grunted, sailing with far more velocity than someone his size ought to.

The gigantic king rocketed across the hallway and there was a thunderous crash as Bowser flew through the wall backwards, completely smashing through wall plaster and creating a second Bowser-shaped crater. Zero turned to a few maids and I realized they were covertly exchanging coins; bets were still going on I see.

"Well, so much for not disturbing Mom," Unc whispered.

Dust and plaster coifed in the air like smog and inspired a round of shallow coughs. Bowser's low, guttural cursing was easily heard as he grunted and kicked, his flailing legs the only visible part of him from the hallway.

He looked absolutely ridiculous; Bowser was lodged through the wall with his thick legs sticking out in a very cartoonish fashion. Uncle slapped a hand to his mouth, trying his best not to laugh as Father hovered nearby, making sure not to get too close, "King Bowser are you...well?"

"Oh, I'm just _fine_!" Bowser snarled heatedly and since his head was on the other side of the wall, his voice was slightly muffled, "Nothing compares to having your ass stuck in a wall!"

Unc looked like he was going to pass out from holding in his laughter. Father motioned for all nearby servants to help pull Bowser out of the wall. Most servants looked confused, unsure of where to put their hands and I couldn't blame them, they could grab his legs, tail and his spiny shell was definitely suspect.

"_Oh _Lemme guess! Did anyone make a bet on _that_!?" Bowser snarled, still pissed from being punched through the same wall a second time.

"_Yes_," Zero muttered, smirking, "And profiting off it too."

Unc Apricotto rubbed his chin in thought, "You know, I totally _should_ have..."

"_Dad_!" Peach frowned.

When I saw one of the servants reaching to anchor their hold on Bowser's swinging, lashing tail, I quickly darted forward, "Wait! Father, make sure none of the servants touch his tail!"

Father arched a brow, "Why is that?"

"Uh, it's a Koopa...culture thing, it's taboo..." I did _not _want to explain the specifics and how it would be perceived as a come-on. Bowser would probably fry the servants on site if they touched his tail, "Touching his tail will upset him."

"_Once I unglue my ass from this wall! Mario you're dead! You hear me!? DEAD!"_

"Well, anymore than he already is," I laughed dryly.

"Avoid touching his tail and please, excavate the king quickly and gently," Father ordered.

The servants grabbed onto him and with much ado and cursing from Bowser, the Koopa king was finally plucked out of the wall and hit the ground with a loud, shuddering thud.

I hovered over Bowser, still mindful that he was recovering from previous injuries, "King Bowser are you okay?"

"Yeah, _fine_," he grunted, doing his best to avoid looking at me.

I shot a mild glare at Mario, "You got him, okay? You think you could refrain from knocking him through anymore walls? He's _hurt. _See the bruises? He's still recovering. Try it again and I'll knock _you _through a few walls!"

My speech caused a few people to double take and Mario peered at me skeptically, "But this time-a he came at _me._ And words-a do _not _work on Bowser._"_

Bowser dusted himself off, tossing one last burning, furious glare at Mario. Though Bowser tried to conceal his agitation, it was obvious he was pissed; his tail thrashed violently, his face was still a deep red and every now and then his clenched fists twitched, as if they had a mind of their own.

"Are we okay now?" Father asked, "Nothing else?"

Mario appeared cool and nonchalant though his posture was incredibly stiff and Bowser was stiff fuming. Peach stepped between the two, knowing that neither man would fight with her in their pathway, "Uncle, perhaps we ought to relocate them. Having them room near each other is completely asinine. Who even _planned_ this?"

Alabaster, who was conveniently near the back of the crowd smirked wickedly before his face blanked. Zero's grin wasn't obvious, but I certainly didn't miss it.

Father stepped beside Peach and peered at the two men, "No. We're both gentlemen here, aren't we? You two will keep your current room assignments."

I arched a dubious brow, "Uh...Dad, I'm with Peach, that's _not_ a good idea."

But Father remained stagnant on the issue. He shook his head against the idea of relocating them, "I will not hear otherwise. If you two cannot coexist together, then neither of you can stay here."

Mario appeared taken back as Bowser's jaw dropped, "_What!?"_

"Learn to place your differences aside. The very _last_ thing I have tolerance for is strife, there's enough of that with the Aqualands," Father coolly eyed Bowser, "Will that be too difficult for you, King Bowser?"

Bowser fumed, the onslaught of anger beginning to shade his irises the telltale infuriated orange. After a silent stare down between him and Father, Bowser smoothed his features into a blank, cold expression; it was clear that he was still very put off by the whole thing, "_Of course not_ Emperor."

"And the same goes for you, Mario," Father turned the same critical stare onto the famed red hero, "Can you handle staying beside one of your biggest foes without causing strife? I will not tolerate peril towards such an important ally for Sarasaland."

Though Mario nodded agreeably, his eyes were steely, "Of course, Sire."

"Good," Uncle Apricotto nodded, "now that, that's settled..."

Unc approached Mario, amicably pulling him in for a one armed hug. As Mario arched a brow at the odd behavior, King Apricotto laughed loudly, "May I say that was one nice _shot!_ That punch was _fire_! You were like _POW! And _Bowz went _KER-SPLAT_! He looked like he was trying to catch the first flight out for the day!"

Bowser's eyes instantly cut into dangerous slits as Alabaster tried not to laugh. Peach turned on Uncle, her face flushing pink in embarrassment, "_Father!_ Could we _please _try not to antagonize King Bowser!? Things are spotty between him and Mario enough as it is!"

Unc blinked unthinkingly, "Oh! So...Are you saying I should totally drop the rocket ship analogies I was going to use? I shouldn't say how his big, scaly butt was blasted into outer space?"

Alabaster laughed as Father gave Unc a look, "_Apricotto..."_

Peach looked exasperated, "_Yes_!"

"_Sire_," A maid coughed intentionally, bringing Father's attention to her.

Father smoothly turned to face her, "Miss Mills, how may I help you?"

The maid curtsied before continuing, "Emperor, a guest is awaiting your audience at the throne. She has cleared all levels of security and is present."

"Who is she affiliated with?"

"I'm not quite sure Sire, the Parakoopa claims to work for an adoption agency."

Bowser stopped glaring at Mario and turned his head in the direction of their conversation. The mention of his own citizenry snagged his attention, "Parakoopa? This far out? Emperor, you don't mind if I tag along...?"

Father peered at Bowser one last time before nodding, " I have no qualms with it," then he turned to the servant, "Then let's see to it as soon as possible. Lead the way, if you will."

"Oh! I'm coming too!" Unc bellowed excitedly, "I'm coming too!"

"Sire!" Alabaster called out, "Before you go, what will you have us do about these two very large and _very_ obvious holes in the wall?"

Father peered at the Bowser-shaped holes in contemplation, "See to it that a construction team goes to task on this, will you? King Bowser, King Apricotto and I have business to take care of. Now then Miss Mills, will you lead the way?"

* * *

><p>Indeed, fluttering around the throne room was an excitable Parakoopette who was oohing and awing and fawning all over the beautiful decorations and the golden statues of the past emperors. The second Sakuro's footfall approached, she spun around, beaming brightly, "Good morning Human Emperor!"<p>

Her voice was chirpy, overly cheery as she gave a curtsy midair. Sakuro blinked before peering up at the fluttering, hovering Parakoopette who was still beaming largely, "Good morning, Miss. I hear we have business to discuss."

"Oh we certainly do! Here, let's get closer to talk, shall we?"

With a quick, sure flap of feathery white wings, the Parakoopette landed smoothly. She revealed a clipboard in hand as she smiled up at the two human kings, "Oh my, I didn't realize you were so _tall_. From the air you looked so much smaller!"

"Hey, it's a ParaKoopa!" Apricotto chimed, more than happy to state the obvious.

Sakuro shot him a dry look, "I see that your vision works, _little _Brother."

"Yeah? Well your _face_ doesn't work," Apricotto stuck his tongue out.

Despite her friendly demeanor, the Parakoopette seemed professional. She wore a causal navy blue business suit, had neatly cropped shoulder-length russet hair and big black glasses, "My name is ParaKaren and I'm with the adoption agency F.A.R.T."

Apricotto's cheeks puffed up as he snorted loudly, "The _what _agency?"

"F.A.R.T." Either ParaKaren was too dense to notice the mockery, or it didn't bother her, "Standing for: **F**atherless and motherless **A**ngels a**R**e **T**reasured. It's an acronym." She revealed her F.A.R.T. badge—which had Apricotto in stitches—"I was summoned to the palace based on a situation three oh five one."

"A _what_ situation?" Apricotto sounded lost and Sakuro resisted the unkingly urge to roll his eyes; that's what_ usually_ happened when Apricotto heard a bunch of numbers all at once.

ParaKaren's wide smile never faltered, "Why, I'd be more than happy to explain it to ya! It means there's an unaccounted Koopaling on your premises and I am to take the little angel back to our adoption facilities where he will received the best education, meals and aerobics as he waits for new potential parents for adoption. It'll be so _swell!_"

"I see," Sakuro nodded, "you've come for Kooples."

"_Kooples_!" ParaKaren chirruped, clapping her hands together happily, "What a charming name! A nice Coallandian name! Could I see the little angelshell myself? I can start my report and see how the little guy is doing."

"He's currently with the Empress," Sakuro replied, "Shall I have a servant lead you to Kooples, Ms. ParaKaren?"

"Please sire, ParaKaren is just fine!" She cooed merrily, nearly singing her words, "Oh Humans are so _nice_! I've never had the pleasure of working so closely before! Though your kind are certainly a tad _hairier _than I thought…Oh well! Better begin the paperwork then!"

As ParaKaren began to scribble furiously, quill tearing furiously at the thick stack of documents in hand, a new voice with loads of bass entered the conversation, "You're here for Kooples, Koopette?"

"Indeed sire! And may I say _ooh_, what a _voice_! You sound almost like a Koopa! My name is—" ParaKaren finally peered up from her clipboard and froze the moment she realized whom she was looking upon. King Koopa, _King Bowser_, was peering down at her with his famous self-indulgent smirk.

ParaKaren blinked rapidly, pulling down her glasses to peer at him with her naked eyes. Her jaw should have been touching the earth's molten core since it was hanging so low, "_Oh my Stars_ i-i-i-it's _the K-K-K-K-King_! Holy...STARS! _It's KING BOWSER_!"

Both human kings thought it was odd when Bowser, still smirking with hellish glee, suddenly plugged his ears. They quickly found out seconds later why he had done such a thing.

Sakuro and Apricotto both flinched when the Parakoopette squealed shrilly, covering her flushed cheeks with her palms. Her eyes were glittering and twice as large as before, "O-O-Oh my Stars! H-He's here! I-I can't believe it! He's even _cuter_ in real LIFE~!"

Apricotto frowned, "Why don't _my _subjects do that when they see me? I'm totally hip too!"

Sakuro turned to Bowser, and though he was amused, he hid it well behind a straight face, "Is this a common occurrence? You certainly seem prepared."

Bowser shrugged, and the sly grin had yet to leave his face, "Yeah this happens _sometimes."_

"S-Sire!" ParaKaren fluttered in front of him, eyes still filled with stars and cheeks rosy and flushed, "m-may I say that television does _not _do you JUSTICE! You and those big…_juicy_...muscles…"

Confused, Apricotto scratched at his chin , "Bowz is _cute?"_

Bowser smirked; honestly he could do this all day, being worshiped and adored by Koopettes never got old, but as a _gracious_ and _dedicated _ruler, he had to set aside his ego. For the _greater good_ of his people. Kooples was more important. _But_ once matters were settled, she could go _straight_ back to drooling over him, "And what burrow is my Koopette from?"

ParaKaren gawped stupidly, failing to even process his question. Bowser, who was still very amused and very much into having his ego stroked, cleared his throat to grab her attention.

That snapped ParaKaren out of her trance and her face flushed a bright red, "O-Oh! I beg your pardon! I'm f-from the Ashlands Burrow Sire! A-And our F.A.R.T. establishment—"

Bowser frowned, "What? _The Fart establishment_? What the hell is _that_?"

Apricotto burst out laughing as the star-struck Koopette kindly shook her head, "Ah…I-It's F.A.R.T. Sire. **F**atherless and mothers **A**ngels a**_R_**e **T**reasured. It's an acronym."

Bowser grinned largely and coughed suspiciously into his fist; he didn't fool _anyone_, Sakuro and Apricotto both knew he was laughing, "Okay then. So what's up Ladyshell?"

"I'm here for a Kooples Koopa," ParaKaren spoke, peering at the clipboard for a second. Though she finally managed to equip her professionalism, her face was still flushed and her dreamy smile too obvious.

Bowser's words slid into a deep, incomprehensible growl. Sakuro and Apricotto were confused; why was he growling? Was he upset with the Koopette, but that couldn't be because moments later the smiling ParaKaren clucked back a reply, gesturing largely with her high-pitched clucks. The inarticulate exchange of growls and clucks continued between them, leaving the human kings out of the loop.

"What are they _doing_?" Apricotto scratched his head.

"I assume they're speaking in their native language," Sakuro hummed.

Finally the Darklandian conversation of grunts, snarls and coos between Bowser and the social worker ended when ParaKaren gawped. Her wings fluttered even more erratically than usual as she squinted at him, "S-Sire let me get this _straight. _You're willing to watch over the Koopaling!?"

"Sure," Bowser smirked, "I've become attached to the little shell and want to personally find him a good family who I know will take care of him. I want to _personally_ be involved in Kooples' adoption."

"Sire…you…you…" The Koopette's eyes grew large and shone with stars as she clasped her hands together in girlish glee, "You are _wonderful. _How is it possible to be so _masculine_ and tough and yet so kind and…and _gentle_!?"

"Heh," Bowser smirked, and peered towards the heavens valiantly. It wasn't lost on Sakuro when the king suddenly struck a heroic pose: arms akimbo, chest out and eyes looking _beyond,_ "I know I can make it look _effortless. _Being a _force _of sheer masculinity but at the same time..."

"This is one of the most ridiculous things I've seen in _awhile_," Sakuro muttered.

"But then," Bowser's expression grew soft, gentle, and ParaKaren was eating up every moment of his performance, "I also care for Koopalings...Sometimes it's...it's so _hard._ Being a terrible, bastardly force of masculine _nature _while protecting and watching out for the helpless young..."

"M-My king," ParaKaren whispered, "You are _amazing..."_

Apricotto leaned towards his older brother and whispered, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think she _liked _him."

Sakuro pinched the bridge of his nose, "Apricotto?"

"Yes big bro?"

"_Be silent_."

Completely clueless, Apricotto bobbed his head agreeably, "Well, only because you asked so nicely."

Exasperated, Sakuro closed his eyes; sarcasm definitely was not his younger brother's strong suite. Or anything that involved critical thinking in general.

"Well Sire," ParaKaren was still glowing with an obvious blush, "The day you decide to look at potential parental candidates for sweet Kooples, let me know and I can personally walk you through the process!"

"Will do. And I can assure you, he's the perfect model of health and he's perfectly safe with me."

"O-Oh course. Thank you for your time _My king_~!" she lowered her glasses and shot her sovereign a flirtatious wink before turning and bowing to Sakuro, "And of course thank you for taking time to hear me out, Human king."

Sakuro nodded, "It is my pleasure Miss ParaKaren."

"And remember," ParaKaren beamed down at them, already beginning to float towards the exit, "We move with the warmth and maturity of maternal bliss and the strength and confidence of paternal warmth. F.A.R.T.'s true essence will _blow you away_!"

The second she flew out of earshot, Bowser turned to peer at Apricotto before they both burst into riotous gut-busting laughter, with Sakuro shaking his head at the immaturity and absurdity of it all.

"F.A.R.T.'s essence will _blow you away_!?" Apricotto's voice rose into a squeak as he laughed, his face turning red from exertion. Bowser bellowed with loud laughter, slapping Apricotto's back in a genial gesture that actually sent him sprawling to the floor.

Someone pointedly cleared their throat. All three kings turned to Seldor Salini, who was standing a few paces away. If he had overheard their silly conversation, his stoic expression certainly didn't give anything away. Seldor bowed to both royals before turning to his own monarch, "Emperor, as requested, I have gathered the council. We await your account within the Aqualands."

Apricotto's smile dimmed and Bowser's smooth, relaxed visage calcified; well that definitely killed the mood. Sakuro peered at both his brother and Bowser before nodding to Salini and if the emperor had been calm moments earlier, it was completely drained now. Sakuro's harsh countenance could have been carved from stone, "If you two will excuse me, I must take my leave. Very well then, lead the way Seldor."

* * *

><p>With the Aqualandian treaties falling apart around us, Peach had decided we both needed some well-deserved pampering. It wasn't long when my face was covered in some goopy, pale green mud mask. Peach claimed it would tighten my skin and fight off wrinkles.<p>

But that's just it.

_I'm twenty three._

I've been royally _screwed_ in the way of the gene pool if at the tender age of twenty three I had a face full of wrinkles. Besides, Grammy was well into her seventies and had very few wrinkles and most people usually guessed her to be at least a decade younger than what she is.

So here we were, getting a spoiling 'girls' day in' together. With Father's approval one of the castle's free courtrooms was transformed into a miniature day spa. We got fairly naked, donned on white robes and I took in all the beautification neutrally.

I watched with no real interest as a few aestheticians quietly filed and shaped my nails, then finished both fingernails and toenails with a bright eye-popping blue polish.

Peach relished all the pampering, peering at all the potential colors to polish her nails. She hummed thoughtfully to herself, observing the rainbow of colors, "Hmm, what color should I get? I like this color, kiss me red. Ooh, and what about this purple? Purple sunset bliss? How _lovely!_ What to choose..."

"Number one hundred eight, tickle me pink," I muttered under my breath; it was the same shade of pink Peachy _always _choose. It was half a step darker than her natural blush.

"Alright!" Peach chirruped happily, decisively, "I'd like one hundred eight please, tickle me pink! Isn't that name so _cute! _ Tickle me pink! How _clever_!"

The massage wasn't half bad actually. Knots were worked out and though I was a little sore by the end of it, I did feel better. I learned Peach was a secretive masochist on the sly, enjoying each and every rough second of her massage. She actually had me laughing with some of the things she said during the massage:

"Make it hurt please! Thank you!"

"_Oh yeah_! When you put your foot in my ribs, that felt _good_."

"Can you _really _get rough there? Thank you!"

We finished our pampering session by marinating in a warm, borderline hot milk bath treatment that promised to detoxify and purify our skin. Once completely submerged, the beauticians bowed before quietly picking up after themselves and shutting the door on the way out.

Peach sighed happily, cheeks and face flushed from the sauna's warm, fragrant vapors, "Feels good huh?"

"Mhm, it does," I purred, "This wasn't too bad. Well, _this _part of it anyways."

"The entire girl's day in was awesome, you just don't want to admit you liked being a _girl _today," Peach grinned.

That was exactly it. I just didn't want to admit I enjoyed being a _girl. _That was sarcasm by the way.

Peach leaned over the side of the tub and grabbed a couple of strawberries. She popped one of them into her mouth, cooing happily at the sweet fruit's delicious taste. She peered at me with a smile that promised mischief.

_Uh oh._

"_So..."_ Peach cooed, trying to be perfectly nonchalant, "You've got a lot of things to tell me...And I mean _a lot_."

I knew where this was going, it was impossible to miss. It was as obvious as Wario's body odor; you ain't missing it, "Yeah? Like what?"

"Well, you just finished traveling the world with several cute princes," Peach beamed, "And I want to know what happened? Tell me about all of them!"

"What do you want to know?" I reached over and helped myself to the pail of iced strawberries.

With the big blue eyes and the soft smile, Peach managed to look completely innocent, "Did you _kiss _any of them?"

"_Wh-What_!?" I nearly choked, "Peach you just don't...start off asking _that_!"

My face flushed an unbelievable shade of red and Peach's laughter didn't make me feel any better, "You did! _Oh my Stars_! _Who_ did you kiss!? I remember a couple of the princes and for the most part they were cute! Real cute!"

"Uh..." I turned away and tried to hide my face, "Look, could we _not _talk about this!?"

Peach swam over; I'm positive she was trying to cage me in. She had the ability to smile innocently, as if she wasn't a devil in angel's skin. I felt her fingers grip my shoulders as she spun me to face her, "Talk. _Now_. I_ know_ you kissed Luigi."

I frowned, "How do you know _that_?"

"Oh, well..." Peach suddenly gained an interest in her petal-pink manicure, "maybe I saw you?"

"You were _spying_ on us!?"

Again, Peach appeared far too innocent, "What? _Of course not_. It was _simply_ becoming too stuffy in the castle and I _had_ to get some fresh air. And of course, my_ favorite_ place to travel at night _is_ my personal garden."

Did I buy that? No. I glowered, seeing through her_ really_ thin, weak cover up story, "Well then you know I...kissed Luigi then."

"Okay," she smiled, "Who else?"

"Who's saying I kissed anyone else? Maybe we just..." I laughed at the incredulity of what I was about to say, " all held hands and that was that."

"_Daisy_," Peach laughed, "I _saw _how they all _looked _at you. They all did _not _want to leave. You made a huge impression with them. Now come on and tell your beautiful cousin what happened, _please_?"

I sighed, rubbing my temples and trying not to blush blood-red; I already knew Peach was not going to drop this. I'd have to tell her eventually and maybe Peach could help me sort of my feelings a little more.

I peered at her with resignation, "I..._might_ have kissed them all. Except Zero. And Taurus. _Stars_ I'm glad I didn't kiss that _seloh_."

Peach's jaw dropped, her blue eyes wide with both surprise and amusement, "You did _not_...!"

"I did, okay!?" I snapped, cheeks flushing, "They're all really nice and I...It's going to be so hard to choose my husband. They're all really nice and funny and..."

Peach arched a brow, smiling with a touch of mischief, "And _cute_?"

I thought of the various comely features of my suitors, from the big blue eyes of Silver, to Wolfe's infectious smile, Luigi's soft eyes, and quite frankly Ryu's lean, chiseled form could turn a nun from her walk of virtue. I was surprised when Bowser's rare, soft smile and melting gaze popped into my head.

Hell, I especially liked his sly smile, the one that was lopsided and slick where his eyes narrowed and blazed with mischief. There was something so devilish and _charming_...

I jolted, nearly startling Peach in the process. I gaped dumbly; _Oh my Stars, where did _THAT_ come from? Was I just fantasizing about my best friend's looks!? About his smile!?_

"...Daisy?" Peach asked, "Everything okay?"

"Huh? Y-Yeah, yeah just fine. And yeah, they're all pretty cute," I muttered.

"So tell me about each of them," Peach rested her head into her palm, leaning against the edge of the sauna, "Don't leave me in the dark."

"Well, Silver's the Moonstonian prince. He's the guy with the hair so fair it looks white and—"

"Oh!" Peach snapped her fingers, "He was wearing the cape, right?"

"Yeah."

"He's pretty cute," Peach cosigned happily, "Go on..."

"He's sweet and kind and when I talk he really listens," I paused, thinking about his gentle mannerisms and sweet sincerity, "He's so shy and in the beginning I thought it would be a turn off, but I actually like that about him. He doesn't care that I'm loud and he thinks my jokes are funny."

"He must _really _like you because your jokes are _awful,_" Peach laughed.

She laughed harder when I sent a handful of warm water after her. Try to talk bad about me and my jokes will she!?

"What about the prince with the stunning gold eyes?" Peach's sweet smile curved slyly, "You know, the big strong guy who pulled you away to get you _alone_."

"You mean Wolfe?"

"If that's him," yet again Peach feigned nonchalance, studying her shimmering manicure once more, "He's a _tall_ slice of pie, _isn't he_?"

I coughed, hiding another obvious blush, "Wolfe is a really great person; Peach he's _hilarious_, sweet in an off-colored kind of way and _yes_ Peach. He's a nice, tall, strong guy. Our personalities seem like a dead match, though I'm not sure how he could handle the severe, haughty court life."

And yes. _Damn _was he a nice tall, slice of hunk pie.

Peach fanned away my concern as if it were petty, "You needn't worry about something insignificant like that. What truly matters is if he's a great guy and if he will love you for who you are. Sarasalandian court _will _learn to accept the man _you_ choose."

Was she right? I've always had it ingrained in my mind that my suitor and future husband would have to be someone who could seamlessly fit into the traditionalistic Sarasalandian court. Was I limiting myself here? Wolfe certainly wasn't brought up with a silver spoon in his mouth, but he was funnier and sweeter than ninety percent of the arrogant princes I've met.

Then Peach chuckled again, "Speaking of tall slices of deliciousness, what about Mister blue eyes?"

"Who?"

Peach arched a wheat-colored brow, "Why, Ryu of course."

This time I flushed so dark red that Peach squealed with laughter, "_Oh my Stars_! You _like_ him! Look at you! You're glowing! Literally!"

"H-He's well...in case your eyes don't work Peach, but," I tried to hold in my laughter, "if you look at him in the wrong lighting, his gorgeousness could blind you."

Again I was rewarded by Peach's soft, refined laughter, "He _is _quite good-looking, yes?"

"Mmm, understatement of the year," I laughed, "I wouldn't be surprised if he was banned from kingdoms for being too hot."

"So what do you like about him?" Peach popped another strawberry into her mouth, taking delicate, small nibbles.

I sighed, "He's strong, brave, smart...Handsome. _Real _frickin' handsome."

Peach made a thoughtful look, "Mhm. So what all do you have in common with him? Personality wise."

"Uh well..." I paused, "Besides a strict father? He's serious..."

"Unlike you," Peach chimed in.

"He doesn't speak much..."

"Unlike you, _again_."

"Uh...and he's smart?"

Peach arched a dubious brow, "My, that little in common huh?"

I paused, peering at the ceiling pensively; she had a point. Ryu and I were complete polar opposites; I was opinionated and loud, he spoke only when needed, I was impulsive and he seemed to move with calculated decisiveness. At times I could trip over thin air and Ryu had a honed catlike grace that seemed effortless.

At the core though, we seemed as if we could mesh; he held a deep reverence for his elders and ancestors as I did. He could relate to the lonely void, the eternally unhealed wound left from his mother's premature death. And he certainly understood how heavy the mantle of leadership was; both of us were expected to morph into what our elders wished us to be.

And yes. As an added bonus he was _delicious as hell_.

"You know," I began softly, "I think we're very different but at the core, we share similar values. The important ones. Get what I'm saying? We respect our elders, respect and live our cultures and we take our roles as leader seriously."

Peach nodded before she grinned suddenly, "Oh! What about Bowser?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, "He's my best friend."

Peach performed a completely overdramatic double take, smiling widely, "_Best friends_!? And when have you been _best friends_ with him!?"

My cousin's wide grin and enraptured gaze made me feel anxious, "Well we've always been best friends, what's the big deal?"

I didn't fail to notice how she slowly drew closer, "So what do you _think _about him?"

"Uh, what do you mean? I always have lots of fun with him, he's hilarious, strong, and you won't believe me, but he's kind of sweet," I smiled at the thought of Bowser's rare, soft side, "I think he just doesn't like showing it. What would people think if they knew the evil demon king was kind and a really good father?"

Peach's grin was almost sly, "Right, I can see that. Bowser's probably _only_ sweet around _you, _am I right? Like he treats you different from everyone else...? The gifts, the expensive nights out on the town, the trips to the orchestra, the visits to his child's school, the way he stares when you're _not looking_..."

I couldn't explain why, but my temperature suddenly flushed. Maybe it had to do with Peach's teasing grin, as if she knew _something. _I turned away from her slightly, "...A-And just _what_ are you trying to get at here!?"

Her soft giggle was lighter and airier than a cumulus cloud, "_Oh nothing_...So now you've got to tell me another thing. _Who _was the best kisser?"

I whipped around wildly, splashing water everywhere as I did so, "Wha—!? _Peach!"_

"Come _ooon_!" She crooned, "Give! Give!"

"Fine," I smirked, crossing my arms, "But if _I _answer, _you_ have to tell me about you and _Marmar."_

Peach's face flushed pink but she huffed with girlish indignation, "Fine. Now _spill."_

With an irritated sigh, I glared away from her big, curious eyes, "It's...kind of a tie."

"A tie!?" Peach gasped, excitedly, eyes lighting up, "Between who and whom!?"

"Ryu and...uh...Stars, I can't _believe_ I'm going to say this..." I squeezed my eyes shut, "It's between Ryu and..."

"_And._..?" Peach parroted, hanging onto my every word.

Well I might as well say it, knowing the moment the words fall from my lips, I'd never live it down. I released a deep sigh before nearly whispering, _"...Bowser_."

Peach covered her mouth, laughing so hard she was shaking, "_Bowser!?_ Oh my S—Did you just say _Bowser!_? I've got to know what makes him a good kisser? Doesn't he have fangs? You'd think he'd be a really _awful _kisser. And isn't he cold-blooded!? He's scaly and rough and doesn't he _smell bad_!?"

I laughed at the last one, "Peach no! He's been kidnapping you for years!"

"He's _never _kissed me though!" she was still excited, "Now spill please!"

"Actually, Bowser's really warm. I'll have to ask him if Koopas are warm-blooded. But every time he holds my hand—"

"He holds your _hand_?" Peach beamed, arching a brow, "Hmm, how..._interesting."_

"Yes. And he doesn't smell bad, his scent is more like...smoke? It's like an earthy smell. It's not bad or anything, I just don't know how to explain it. Also, I dunno how to describe his kisses, it's like..." I paused thoughtfully.

"Yes..." Peach nodded encouragingly, her eyes wide and bright and glittering, "_Go on_..."

Heat slowly began to build in my cheeks; it felt like my cheeks were made of fireflowers, "It's like he..._you know_...takes his time. He...responds to me. It's like he's aware of what I'm comfortable with and doesn't go beyond that. Oh, I know! Remember when we went to the royal girls' prep school as teenagers?"

Peach nodded, "Of course I do."

"Good. Then remember when some of the girls shared how 'touchy' and aggressive their boyfriends were when they made out?" My mouth moved to the side, unimpressed.

"Yeah," Peach nodded, her expression tightening, "It was like when they kissed, they were...were _racing_ or something. They were touching all over each other and in public no less! It was absolutely disgusting!"

"Yeah, exactly," I scrunched up my nose at the memory. I remember being in preparatory school with Peach and seeing a few of our fellow classmates making out with their boyfriends, "It seemed like when they kissed they tried to eat each other's faces off or something! It was one of the most terrible things I've seen. And I've seen Wario in a speedo!"

Peach laughed, covering her mouth coquettishly," Daisy! Don't be mean! He didn't look...that bad!"

"Don't you lie Peach!" I laughed.

We both laughed deeply, though Peach's laughter always remained soft and feminine, tinkling and wispy. My laughter softened, "Well, kissing Bowser was _nothing _like that. It wasn't disgusting or cheap...Actually I really like his kisses."

Peach's expression was dove-soft, "Really?"

"Yeah...He's patient and...really gentle..." I could still feel the blush warming my cheeks as I smiled. I thoughtlessly drew circles on the water's surface, "When you look into his eyes...you can't help but feel like you're caught in them. His eyes are intense and soft at the same time..."

Stars, where did these crazy warm feelings come from? My stomach felt as if it was filled with fluttering winged wigglers and my face was slowly becoming ripe and rosy with blush.

"I don't know how to explain it," I whispered, "But his kisses are so soft and slow and..."

"Melting?" Peach was smiling now with none of the playful rakish she had before.

"Yeah!" I laughed, "I feel like _such _a girl, but there's _something _about the way he looks at me. I feel all warm and gooey and _stupid._"

Peach laughed, resting her back comfortably against the wall of the sauna, "Yeah, that's how I feel when I kiss Mario. He speaks to me in Italian and it's so wonderful. Ooh, how I _melt_! I can just listen to him _all _day, whispering words in that pretty language..."

I raised both eyebrows and smirked, "Well, _well._ It sounds like Machi was pulling out the big gun moves on you! Are you two official yet?"

Peach sighed wistfully, eyes downcast as she drew ripples in the water with her index finger, "No. He's told me once or twice that he doesn't think he's cut out for the court life and all the pressures with it."

I rested my elbows against the cusp of the sauna, pondering her words. I can see where Mario's coming from; most people envied royalty because they saw the benefits: servants, wealth, and fame but there were many disadvantages that were inherited with the crown.

You had enemies, people who hated you without ever speaking a single word to you. Your privacy and freedom were pretty much nonexistent and when you traveled, you had to be armed with a legion of guards. Everything you said, did, and wore was heavily scrutinized and worst of all, most royals had arranged marriages.

Mario had been a friend to both Peach and I long enough to see the clear, obvious drawbacks of being a royal. I couldn't blame him for wanting to avoid so much trouble; he was a simple man who lived a simple, modest life and truly had all the things he wanted.

But I've seen the way Mario _looks _at Peach, the way he always has. He may not appreciate the glamour and glitz associated with royalty, but I'd bet every coin in the Sarasaland treasury that he'd rather give up his simplistic life than his opportunity with the beautiful, courteous Princess Peach.

"Just give him sometime P," I lightly knocked her shoulder, "He'll come around."

She peered up at me, big blue eyes round and bright, "You think so?"

"Yeah I know so. If not," I shrugged, "I'll kick his ass."

Peach laughed softly, "Thanks Yellow."

"No problem Pink."

As Peach sighed, closing her eyes and enjoying the soothing warm waters, I mentally chewed the fat. I thought of all my suitors, quietly weighing their pros and cons and usually where I focused most of my romantic energy on Ryu, I caught my thoughts drifting towards the charismatic entity that was my best friend.

_Was that...weird?_

* * *

><p>"…which concludes the summary of last evening's negotiations," Sakuro's voice was completely inflectionless. Hot spotlights glared down upon him from directly overhead and made beads of sweat collect at his brow. But he was Emperor Sarasaland, and even under the hottest lights and the most intense pressure, he was to appear perfectly cool, collected. He looked up from his notes and peered over the crowd of murmuring councilors.<p>

The emperor stood behind an elevated podium peering down at his council as he continued, "Sarasaland wished to placate an unreasonable Aqualand and Prince Taurus thought himself above common decency. It is with a heavy heart that I report we've come to an embittered impasse."

The Great Sarasalandian council murmured amongst each other in low, hushed undertones. Sakuro remained standing at the podium, allowing his council to digest the account. He took in the disbelieving furrowed brows and the tense, angry lines in their posture. Every now and then a stream of the councilors' murmurs would raise above their monotonous prattle.

"I cannot believe the audacity of that young man…"

"We've certainly been had. We once considered having our princess in a union with him."

"He thinks because their kingdom supplies our water that he can yank us which every way."

Within the distinguished crowd, Seldor Salini, the head of the councilmen was stationed front and center, quietly speaking with his subordinates. And to his right was his heir, Zero Salini who remained silent, thoughtfully processing everything.

Sakuro signaled for the entire court's attention and slowly the soft murmurs died away. Once all eyes were upon him, the Emperor's visage was perfectly straight. Seldor nodded, giving the floor to the emperor to speak.

"I have one last inquiry I would like to make before we adjourn," Sakuro's stance tightened minutely as he squared his shoulders, "Prince Taurus mentioned_ something_ I have to inquire about. Prince Aqualands mentioned a few ghastly things about our beloved Empress. And I had to double check something myself."

"He mentioned that fifty, sixty odd years ago that the empress," Sakuro smoothly moved his hand beneath the oak podium to hide his shaking digits, " had been forced against her will to sleep with king Aqualands, Prince Taurus' grandfather," Sakuro's voice was a low snarl, "Is _this _true?"

The council fell deathly quiet in one sudden sweep. The stupor on most of the councilmen's faces was sorely unhidden, though Seldor Salini's countenance remained closed and grim.

One councilor rose to his feet, "Emperor you must—"

"And even though you all _knew _of this deplorable atrocity," When Sakuro peered up at his council, thick shadows bled into his eyes and blackened his expression with maleficent darkness, "the councilors as one entity _still _suggested that Prince Taurus remain as one of our cherished princess' suitors? Am I _right_?"

The courtroom was dead silent, completely saturated with ominous tension. Faces were pale, throats were dry and beads of sweat clustered at foreheads and armpits.

When Sakuro resumed speaking, his voice was speciously soft, "Knowing what I know now… I tend to think that Prince Taurus is a little less asinine. Who could fault his arrogance? I _too _would lack_ severe_ respect for Sarasaland if I were in his predicament."

The sheer incredulity of the situation made Sakuro laugh, "Could you imagine _that_? Let us place ourselves in Taurus' place. Imagine that my sordid grandfather forced the empress into bedding him and yet half a century later, the same kingdom is _offering _ an opportunity to marry their princess? My Stars, I bet this whole time Taurus has been _laughing _at us. Laughing at _me."_

The council room remained silent as Sakuro's mood changed mercurially again as he shot a glare at them all, eyes impassioned and bitterly cold at the very same time. Seldor rose to his feet, "Emperor please…there's a story—"

Sakuro turned his head way, focusing his glare someplace else. The emperor raised a silencing hand, "Court adjourned. We shall reconvene tomorrow at seven am."

The emperor didn't bother waiting for any responses. Sakuro simply pivoted on his heel and left the courtroom, uncaring of all the eyes upon him and uncaring of what his council thought. Seldor remained standing, watching with grim acceptance as the emperor disappeared from sight.

Zero, his son who was always so collected and composed, looked completely floored. He watched the last trances of the emperor's robe disappear from sight before turning to stare at his father.

"...Is this _true_?" Zero asked quietly, maybe even with a touch of disbelief in his voice.

"Not now, Zero," Seldor whispered.

But the young councilor wouldn't be hushed. His eyes were bright with anger, and in an unusual show of emotion, Zero spoke through his teeth, "The queen was forced to sleep with Taurus' grandfather and yet the council..._still _suggested that we make Taurus a potential suitor!? What the hell were you all thinking?"

"_Zero,"_ His father growled, "I said _not now_."

The soured frost in Salini's voice left no leeway for argument. Zero glared at his father, waging a silent battle of wills. Seldor stepped closer to his son until he was close enough to dip forward and whisper in his son's ear, "This is _not_ the place to have this discussion. We are in front of the great council and we will not give them a show. Reign in your anger. You are my protégé and are to act accordingly. We will discuss this but not here. Not now."

Salini pulled away, just long enough to give his son one last hard stare before moving away completely. Zero fumed silently, clenching his jaw; father was right. This was not the time nor the place to investigate the matter. They were the highest ranking of the council, the elite amongst the elite. And the elite did not cry, or pout, or give into petty emotion.

Zero ignored the lingering, curious stares of the other councilors. He turned on his heel and marched out the court room, heading for the quickest source of fresh air and tranquility.

* * *

><p>Sakuro made a furious beeline for his mother's bedchambers, carving a thin trail through maids and servants who quickly stepped out of his warpath. His long strides devoured the distance and he would be arriving at his destination in no time at all.<p>

With each step he took, his blood boiled, pulsing through his veins like a shot of fire. Sakuro didn't bother to knock when he shoved the door open with resounding force.

There he found Daisy and Peach visiting with their grandmother, laughing and giggling without a care in the world. Daisy spun to face her dad, smiling with a luminosity that was painfully similar to her mother, "Hey Dad! How—?"

"_Dad_?" the emperor didn't quite snap. His eyes thinned as his posture grew tense, "Since when have I allowed such disrespectful informality? I am your _father._ You will do well to remember, _child."_

Daisy, Peach and Meringue looked taken back; though Meringue was more surprised and Daisy appeared hurt. Daisy quickly turned her head away with a light frown, her cheeks reddening in a mixture of humiliation and anger, "Yes _Father."_

_Chisana's_ insolent tone didn't sit well with him at _all._ Sakuro frowned, stepping forward to reprimand his haughty daughter but Meringue raised a hand to halt his approach, "_Pichi, Preciosa_ can you both give me a second alone with my son_? _Something is obviously bothering him. Even he isn't this anal normally."

Peach quickly realized that there was something deeper at play here and set to task immediately. She clutched her cousin's arm and gently coaxed her along, "Come on. Let's go have some tea now. Doesn't it sound delicious, Daisy?"

"Okay…" Daisy replied weakly.

She trounced passed her _father_, nose held up high as she left the room. Sakuro peered after his daughter for a second before spinning on his heel to bore down on Meringue, who was watching him with the most infuriatingly calm stare, "And _you_. You're the _reason _Daisy's beginning to become so insolent. You've always spoiled her, encouraging her to be so mouthy—"

Grammy arched a well-shaped brow, "_Encouraging _my granddaughter, the future empress of Sarasaland to have an opinion is _wrong_? Or are you just _very _bent out of shape over something?"

"Furthermore," Sakuro continued as if she hadn't spoken, "Now that I think about it, perhaps it's from her spending all that time with the Darklandian king. Stars knows how impetuous and hot tempered he is. It's probably finally boiling over on her—"

Meringue's voice was laced with the perfect measure of coolness as her eyes narrowed a fraction "Sakuro. _Stop_."

Sakuro closed his mouth.

"Now tell me what's really bothering you. Don't you think I know my own child? Something is _really _bothering you. And it has to be something important because you don't let insignificant things bother you. Now what is it?"

Sakuro spoke monotonously, "I had to find out from Prince Taurus of all people that my _mother _was taken advantage of. I didn't hear it from you, or from the council, but from _him_. One of the most deplorable people I've had the displeasure of meeting. And _he _informed me."

Meringue stared at him, opting to remain silent as she stewed on his words. Finally she released a sigh, her stern visage folding, "I can't answer why the council didn't tell you. But I can certainly tell you why I didn't."

"Then _why_? What would compel you to keep such a thing from me?" Sakuro fell silent, before replying in earnest, "Because you think I cannot sympathize? Does Apricotto know?"

"He doesn't. Neither of you did before this. And I know you're perfectly capable of being kind," Meringue sighed tiredly, "It's just…I don't want my sons, let alone my granddaughters knowing about something so horrid that happened to me."

Sakuro's eyes tightened, and something in his gut told him that, "Daisy knows doesn't she…?"

"Mhm," Meringue hummed softly, "Apparently the _seloh _prince—"

"Don't use such language, Mother—"

Meringue arched a brow,"—told Daisy about it. Apparently he enjoys being a _sheyt _stirrer."

"_Mother_."

Meringue laughed, "Okay, okay I'll stop now. Even if he is an _idioto_."

Sakuro clenched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and pointer finger, slowly counting backwards to avoid the rising headache. When Meringue spoke again, he tried not to appear agitated, she was his mother and it would be terribly disrespectful.

"Sakuro, I realize you're stressed; about your kingship, about this debacle with the Aqualands, but this is not how you should handle things."

Sakuro barely titled his head, eyes narrowing slightly, "What do you mean, Mother?"

Meringue peered at him again with cool, sharp ultramarine eyes, "You came in here like a tornado; you were waspish and snapped at _Pichi_ for something completely insignificant. And then you had the nerve to try to lecture me."

When the emperor tried to speak, Meringue gave him a pointed look that shut his mouth, "And don't think I didn't notice you failing to knock before entering. I've taught you better than that. You were just one large _seloh_ unnecessarily. We get it, Sakuro. You're stressed. But don't make the same mistake my mother made."

"And what mistake was that?"

"My mother was just that. A mother. A disciplinarian. She wanted me to fit into a very narrow mold of what was expected of me and abhorred that I refused. I was her _daughter _Sakuro. When I…" Meringue closed her eyes before speaking, "_visited _King Pisces to make good on our pact, I was terribly broken up afterwards. My mother had known _exactly_ what I had been through. She saw me crying and not once did she comfort me. Not _once._ King Serous and Kamek Koopa were the only people who had been there for me. I had been such a wreck."

Sakuro made a face, "You think I _wouldn'_t comfort _Chisana _if such a thing happened to her? Stars know I would— "

"No, I'm not saying that at all. I'm saying that while you have the _chance_ to have a good relationship with your daughter. Have it. She's terribly hurt after you snapping at her like that. In case you forgot, you're not the _only_ person Prince Seloh wasn't all that kind to."

Sakuro's eyes grew a shade darker; _Chisana_ had told him how he had tried to blackmail her into having intercourse. That arrogant, irresponsible _punk _had tried to force his precious little girl into doing something so _vile..._

Sakuro's jaw clenched and his hands curled into tightly wound fists, "Let's be straight. I _never _forgot what he's done to _Chisana_. I cannot even express in words how upset I am. If I was not the emperor of Sarasaland, I would have—I'd have had unspeakable things done to him."

"Then go and talk to her. She's been through a lot too. She feels as if she has the weight of the world upon her shoulders," Meringue smiled warmly, "She _needs _you."

Sakuro's expression darkened with loathing and a somber realization, "…"

Grammy smirked, "What is it Sakky?"

"I..." Sakuro couldn't face his mother's warm, open expression any longer and turned away. His shoulders became square and tense, "…I've been a fool haven't I?"

When he spoke, his words were barely above a whisper, " I…didn't mean to come off so angry and demanding…I didn't mean to snap at her...but with everything that's been going on…" Sakuro rubbed at his eyes tiredly, "I've been stressed and furious..."

"Mhm…" Meringue nodded.

Sakuro rubbed agitatedly at this forehead, "Stars..._Chisana_'s probably scared and feels overwhelmed and here I was being so cruel…"

Meringue smiled, motioning him closer, "It's okay, son. Go and see her. Talk to her and _listen_. It will make things better. Okay, pull it in. Even emperors need hugs from their mothers."

Sakuro smiled gently as he leaned in and embraced his mother as the feel of her warm, thin hands enveloped him. There was no scent quite like his mother's; the subtle aroma of lavender and powder blended seamlessly into calming solace.

He'd make things right again with _Chisana_, and with King Bowser, who he had been nothing but frosty towards, he'd finally give him a chance. A real chance to feel out his character and see who he was.

* * *

><p>Bowser relaxed in bed, arms tucked comfortably behind his head as he glared at the ceiling. He was still silently fuming over the entire unexpected run in with Mario, who had yet <em>again<em> effortlessly kicked his ass—and this time through a wall. _Twice_.

The king released a low, self-depreciative growl the more he replayed everything in his head; _leave it to Plumber Mcdickweed to knock my ass out with a single blow. And worse yet Flower saw the whole thing._

The thought of Flower witnessing his humiliating defeat nearly made the king nauseous with disgust. _She saw the whole damn thing. She saw Maria send me flying. She probably thinks I'm...I'm..._

_WEAK._

Just even thinking the word shot a sweltering flourish of hot fury into the king's system like molten lava. Bowser snarled ruthlessly, pounding his fist into the poor comforter. And then to add a cherry atop the shit sundae, Sakuro had issued a very forthright ultimatum; get along or get out.

The emperor made it very clear that he didn't give a damn that they had been trying to pillage, kill and wreck each other for the last two decades. If they were guests in his palace, they were to abide by his house rules. Both legendary titans were expected to live side by side with his worst enemy and not create any ripples.

Bowser chuckled dryly and shook his head; the emperor's agenda was pretty transparent; this was all a test. Sakuro knew that Mario was magnanimous enough to get along with his worst foe, but he was assessing, really seeing if King Bowser could do it.

As Bowser continued to meditate over the entire unsavory position he was stuck in, his personal cell rang. Only a special few people had his number, which meant whomever was calling, it was someone he cared for. He picked up the sleek phone and drawled, "Yeah…?"

"_Ruffians_," A refined, aristocratic voice snarled, "_Uncivilized, typhoid-_ridden _scallywags, the lot of them_! _Tell me, tell me my scaly associate how are we to extract our sweet, dark revenge? I say we throw them all into bland paintings for three millennia! That'll teach those aqueous cretins_!"

Bowser sighed, instantly feeling a headache coming on. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his snout, "Ichabod…"

"_We shall make them pay! Oh how we shall humiliate and feast upon their shame! We shall bathe in their stupidity and drink their horror!"_

"Ichabod," Bowser tried not to laugh, "How in the _hell _did you even figure out how to use a cell phone?"

Then there was a pause, "_What is the meaning behind that inquiry, knave? Dare you think of me as daft? As a simpleton!?"_

"That didn't answer my question," Bowser smirked.

"_I am quite capable of figuring out your haywire technological gizmos on my own, you lout."_

"No you're not. Hell, you must have had someone help you," Bowser laughed, " Wario's _ass _could figure out a phone before you could."

_"…Perhaps I had your beautiful adviser input the numbers on the calling box."_

"Calling box? You mean the telephone?" Then Bowser froze, face scrunching up in confusion, ""Beautiful adviser?' _Who!?_ You're not speaking about _Kammy_ are you_?_ Kamelia? Ole Haggy? Wrinkles Mctwinkles? The Hag Bag? _That _Adviser?"

"_I do not know of whom you speak, for the Kamelia Koopa I doeth see is fair and bootiful."_

Bowser rolled his eyes; he always knew King Boo was insane, but apparently he was terribly blind as well. That or he had a strange definition of what he considered attractive; probably the latter honestly. Then something came to mind, "Wait, you're still at the keep? I thought you returned home."

_"I had returned to my own wretched manor, but then I caught word of the Aqueous kingdom's treacherous assault upon thee. Cowardly, yellow-bellied swine! Festering puss globules they are!"_

This time Bowser did laugh, "Puss globules…? What the hell…"

_"Anyways. I returned immediately to your palace to comfort thou evil spawn."_

Good, at least someone was watching the kids.

"I think my advisors are up to something," Bowser hummed aloud, "I'm not sure what it is yet but they're determined to get me out of Sarasaland in a hurry. Think you could keep an eye out for me?"

_"I most certainly can, my scaly friend. It's a good thing I keep Lord Stinkerton's eye present. Spying will be a breeze."_

Bowser squinted in confusion, "..._Who_?"

_"Lord Stinkerton. A knave duke who lived in the seventeenth century. I defeated him in a duel and ever since I have kept his eyeball as a keepsake. I have used his eye to spy and he's quite adroit at it. Though, as the duke was an absolute _lech_, the eye has a tendency to...wander. Can you image if I cut off his hand too? It would be trying to grope anything in a skirt_—_"_

Bowser slapped a hand to his forehead, trying his best to hold back his laughter, "_No_! No. Ichabod...I didn't mean _literally_ keep an eye out. I just meant to watch over them, got it?"

"_Oh...Yes, of course I can do that_."

"Good," Bowser growled contently.

Then there was a mischievous chuckle before, "_Sooo. How is operation 'Getting into the flower garden' going?"_

"Into the wha—? _Oh_. Uh," Bowser scratched the back of his scalp and shrugged, "Dunno. It's hard to say, between her dad who hates me…"

_"I bet you'd love to..." _there was a rather lecherous, mischievous laugh on the other side of the line, _"'pollinate' that flower, wouldn't you? Pluck those pretty petals all day long...?"_

As a Koopa who told dirty jokes all the time, the double meaning was not lost on him, "S-Shut the hell up!"

_"Deflower Daisy huh?" _ King Boo was laughing his translucent ass off, and Bowser knew he was smirking, _"Oh my, that does have a nice ring to it doesn't it? Deflower Daisy...?"_

Bowser's face flushed dark red and he savagely shouted into the receiver, "_YOU SHUT THE HELL UP! Or...Or I'll stick my fist SO far down your throat it'll quench your thirst for WEEKS."_

King Boo laughed the threat off and he still sounded amused, "_Alright but I certainly hope you brought the big ammunition that I spoke of...?"_

Bowser smirked, "I did. You said to give it to her on my last day here, right?"

_"Yes. It will make her remember and long for thee."_

"That's what I want," Bowser spoke softer, "For Flower to think of me, even when I'm gone..."

_"Oh trust me then, your gift will make her think of you long after your absence."_

"That's good to know. I want her to—"

There was a soft knock on the door, "Icky, I've got to go. Keep watch over the Koopalings, and especially watch over the councilors, got it?"

_"Aye aye sire! I will sneak and probe and watch like none other!"_

Bowser hung up, walking to his suite door and yanking it open. If it was Mario, he'd punch him right in the kisser. But the new face was just another maid. She bowed before speaking, "King Bowser, your presence is requested by Her eminence, Empress Meringue."

Grammy wanted to see him, huh? "Sure, lead the way."

Bowser followed the maid through the halls, though it was unnecessary. He could easily find the empress's bedchambers and track her scent with little difficulty.

Grammy was the only person in the palace who smelt like mint and rain. They took an elevator down a few flights and the second they stepped out, the Empress' subtle minty scent was saturating the air. That and another scent that smelt like tangerines was strong as well. She must have had Kooples with her.

Bowser wrapped his knuckles against the door with carefully applied force; Kooples might be asleep.

"Come in!" A feminine, cheery voice called out.

"Alright."

Bowser softly shut the door to the empress' room behind himself as a heady swirl of violets and lilacs floated into his nostrils. He tried to walk softly, aware that despite her good cheer and mirth, Empress Meringue was still recovering and she was indeed very tired.

Grammy sat in bed, well-dressed and sprinkled with light makeup but lacking her usual expensive jewelry. Bowser almost laughed at the empress's lack of enthusiasm; she looked none too thrilled with being bedridden and though she looked several light years better, she still wasn't one hundred percent healthy.

_Everyone can see how tired she is, yet she fights and claims that she's okay. She's certainly a stubborn little thing. Heh, I wonder who Flower gets that from._

Kooples, like most Koopalings already had a strong sense of smell and recognized his king's scent. The Koopaling infant stopped playing with his rainbow colored toys and happily chirruped an excited greeting that Bowser returned with a rumbling, gentle purr.

He rubbed Kooples' smooth scalp before turning to the empress and giving a deep bow; though it wasn't Koopa culture, it was something he had seen Flower do countless times before.

Grammy's smile lit up her entire face, "Ah, learning Sarasalandian culture like a pro! You'll be speaking the Desert language soon. We'll make an honorary Sarasalandian of you yet!"

Though Bowser's expression remained relatively closed, his wagging tail and warm crimson eyes gave away his true mirth, "My queen, what can I do for you?"

And like always, when he spoke with someone he really liked, his voice lost its intimidating growl. He spoke smoother, in a honeyed purr than a gnarr. The queen certainly didn't fail to notice this, "King Bowser! Come! Come closer to me, I'm not going to yell at you from across the room."

Bowser took several loud, clambering steps forward until he was a foot away from the petite queen. And since he towered above her, he bent down to accommodate her, "How are you feeling, Grammy? Not causing too much trouble, huh? You've got to get better before you can wreck havoc."

"Oh I'm _fine,_" Grammy waved away his question, "Once I can convince Sakuro to quit worrying, I'll be up and about again, meddling in my granddaughters' affairs. That _and_," Grammy peered at him from the corner of her eyes, "playing matchmaker of course."

Bowser felt his face flush a treacherous red and cleared his throat pointedly, hoping to relieve some of the sudden awkward focus on himself; _frickin' hell_. How did Grammy always have the ability to do that? To make him blush like a virgin Goomba schoolgirl?

"But _first_," Meringue donned a rare, serious expression, "I want to thank you for protecting Sakuro yesterday."

The king froze, "Wait, how do _you_ know about that? As far as I know, you were resting in here the entire day."

"Oh I was, young shell. It's just that the maids have a tendency to gossip. They're actually a very efficient communication channel," Meringue smiled, "But back to my point. You've protected my granddaughter once already and now you have protected my son. It seems I am indebted to you."

When Meringue bust out a deep bow, Bowser flailed his arms wildly, "No! No...T-That's alright! Really you don't need to do that at all. It actually makes me feel _weird_. You're the _last_ person I want bowing to me. You're already so nice and sweet and that's payment enough. Really."

"Really? Nothing at _all_? No amount of coins? No amount of wealth?" Meringue quirked an eyebrow, grinning impishly, "And you aren't interested in a _certain_ pretty Desert princess?"

Again Bowser coughed into his fist, strategically trying to hide an obvious blush, "T-That didn't even _cross my mind."_

That thought has crossed, tap-danced and even jumped across his mind. Grammy was still grinning wickedly; hell, he knew he wasn't deceiving her at _all_.

"Well King Bowser, if you refuse payment for your kind acts, then maybe I can give you something without monetary value."

When the Empress slowly rose to her feet, Bowser couldn't help but notice how she was even smaller than Flower. The crown of her curly white head barely reached the middle of his ribbed plastron. In one arm alone he had the strength to crush bones and break stone, and yet the tiniest human he knew was the least afraid of him.

For one moment they were peering at each other, Grammy smiling as Bowser watched her anxiously, trying to figure out what thoughts moved behind her glittering eyes.

When she motioned him to take a seat on her bed, he froze. Grammy laughed, still smiling warmly as she placed her hands on his shoulders and helped ease him into sitting. Bowser slowly lowered his weight onto the purple comforter, trying not to crush the bed under his massive weight.

Even sitting he was still bigger, taller than she was, but they were close to face-level as they could be. Bowser was surprised when Grammy gently swept long, thin gloved fingers across the temple of his forehead.

The satin material made her fingers cool and smooth to the touch and her digits were pillow-soft. Grammy smiled down at him sweetly, blue eyes twinkling and warm. Bowser watched her hands move with meticulous curiosity and anxiety.

"What are you doing...?" he asked softly.

The soft, affectionate fingers glided once more through his mane before moving to his face. Her small, warm palms gently cupped his face, resting on either side of his cheek. Meringue carefully studied his expression, "...You're not used to this, are you?"

Her voice remained soft and kind though it held a somber note beneath the saccharine layers, "Has anyone been kind to you like this? Just held you because you were dear?"

The king's muscles locked up like rigor mortis. He didn't have to answer because it was as clear as day on his face. He was confused and angry and bitter and for a vulnerable second it all flashed across his face. Grammy's expression softened, saddening and she held his face just a bit tighter, "_Oh Bowser_…"

"Queen Meringue," frowning, Bowser closed his eyes, "Grammy...I..."

"Not even your father?" Grammy spoke softly, "He never held his son affectionately? No hug? Nothing?"

"No." Bowser's voice managed to be soft and gravelly in the same token.

He showed her the underside of his elbow where a jagged, old scar had healed in a pucker of ugly flesh, "_This _is what he gave his son."

"I knew Morton was a monster. An awful, bloodthirsty monster," Grammy's voice was a whisper, eyes bright and lucid, " It doesn't matter anymore. He's evil and gone."

"I'm the same," Bowser barely whispered, "I'm exactly the same..."

"No, you're not," she smiled confidently.

"Grammy," he tried to turn away from her big, honest eyes. Never had a person tried to see something good in him. Not since Kamek. Not since Kammy. Not since Flower. There weren't many people who even tried.

But here the elderly empress was, looking him dead in the eye and declaring him as worthwhile and good, "I'm just like him. My claws have been stained with so much blood. If...If you knew what I've done you would hate me..."

The empress paused, thoughtfully studying his sullen features before speaking again, "Do you know what I see, when I look at you?" She spoke lightly, still smiling.

She pulled back, as if to get a better complete image of him, "I see a young Koopa who is tough. Strong. Made to be ruthless because it was the only way for him to survive."

When Bowser tried to interrupt her, she kindly waved him off. Under normal circumstances, he would have been pissed if someone tried to shut him up. But Grammy's kind, maternal warmth and her infectious mirth made him not mind in the least. In fact, she actually made him want to listen.

Her eyes were kind, her soft, tiny fingers tenderly stroked his face with a motherly kindness he had never known. Was this what it was like to be cared for? To be cared for by a mother? By a grandmother?

"Beyond the big muscles, the mean scowl and all these rough scales," she even playfully pinched his arm, "is someone who can choose to do good. And you _have_ done good. You protected my cherished granddaughter several times and you are one of the parties involved in keeping my Sakuro safe and alive. There _is _good in you and I'm telling you that."

Her voice fell to a whisper and she was grinning, "_And..._If you want my granddaughter, you will continue to do good. And you can. I have seen kindness in you. I have seen good in you. It won't be easy, you'll even come up short sometimes, but you'll get the hang of it eventually."

Then she sealed her encouragement by pressing a kiss dead smack in the middle of his forehead. The waves of affection were lulling and King Bowser was completely relaxed, his closed in pleasure as he purred gently. Grammy pulled away, smiling brightly, "There you go, _Diyo_."

Bowser squinted, "What does that word mean?"

She smirked impishly, eyes twinkling. She saucily cocked a hip and rested a hand on her hip, "Well. Consider this._ Pichi_ is my _diya_. So what do _you_ think it means?"

His brain raced around for a second before he came to the answer. His brows nearly shot up to his hairline as Grammy winked playfully at him.

_She was calling him…?_

"Okay, so I kind of lied," Grammy laughed, "I said I wasn't going to award you with anything, however I do want to give you this as a show of my gratitude."

Grammy hummed, walking over to and opening an armoire. She came back, revealing a perfectly circular cake with caramel-brown frosting. She must have hid the pastry in an obscure place so he wouldn't have been able to detect it because the scent alone had him nearly salivating.

"It's an almond cake," Grammy smiled, "I made one just for you, dear."

The king's dark red brows were furrowed in disbelief, "…Just for _me_?"

She nodded, "Mhm. It's all yours. Of course Apri, and Sak will want one too. Sakuro always hated sweets, but he'll only eat _mom's_ desserts."

The cake brought to life a very foggy, dim memory. Bowser could remember a long, _long_ time ago when his grandfather was alive that he used to have cakes to celebrate his birthdays.

His birthdays used to include hugs and kisses from the entire castle staff, table-loads of gifts and shiny, brand new expensive toys and the complimentary huge, spine-crushing hug from Granddad.

Each year as a Koopaling Bowser had a running tradition that he _always_ blew out all his birthday candles. It was something he and his beloved grandfather Serous took to heart. It was competitive even.

Serous, the solemn, level-headed Darklandian king set aside _all_ prestigious, majestic ego when it came to birthday cakes. It was a sight to see as he spat, huffed and puffed to asinine levels to make sure he blew out every last candle. And so did Prince Bowser.

When was the last time he had cake? Or had such light-hearted birthday fun? Not under Morton, that's for sure. Morton thought the entire tradition was stupid and he hadn't had a birthday cake since.

But now Grammy was offering a sweet, caramel-colored cake that resurrected warm, funny memories of his grandfather and his Koopalinghood.

"When..." Bowser cleared his throat, trying to hide how moved he was by such a simple gesture, "did you make this?"

Grammy laughed, winking, "It's a secret! Of course I'm not going to tell you! Now eat up, _Diyo_."

The corners of Bowser's mouth twitched, as if he were trying to reign in his growing smile, "Thanks Grammy."

And before she could react, Bowser lunged forward greedily. In a blur of nothing but teeth, mouth and a large, slurping pink tongue, the cake within the Empress' hands disappeared after two monstrous chomps and three disgusting gulps.

Grammy gaped at her newly empty hands before peering back at the king, who was contently patting his stomach. The empress blinked several times before laughing loudly, running a hand through his spiky mane affectionately, "Oh _my_! We have quite the appetite, don't we? You love sweets, just like your Granddad, huh?"

"Yeah," Bowser purred contently.

"Oh that reminds me," Grammy hummed, her eyes beginning to twinkle, "One time, your grandfather and I went fishing. Imagine to my surprise when he didn't use a fishing rod. He thought he could do it by his own claws, well..."

As Meringue fell into spinning another tale about her youth, Bowser remained perfectly content. Was this what it was like to be treated like someone's grandchild? To be nurtured and spoiled and doted upon with gifts? It was kind of...nice.

And just when he thought there wouldn't be any other perks to marrying Flower, there was the gift of being Meringue's well-loved grandson. Someone he could talk to about life's troubles and woes and someone who wasn't afraid to hold or hug him when needed.

As Grammy softly combed her finger through his shaggy red mane, his eyes were nearly completely shut from pleasure. Life as Flower's husband and as Meringue's grandson huh? This he could definitely get used to.

The moment of bliss ended abruptly when there was a soft knock on the door. Bowser's relaxed, half-lidded gaze shot open as the muffled voice on the other side of the door spoke, "...Mother?"

Even without the voice, the emperor's woody, earthy scent grabbed his attention. Grammy peered towards the door, "Sakuro! Come on in dear, King Bowser is awaiting you, just as I promised."

"Just as you promised?" Bowser arched a brow.

"Don't worry dear, Sakuro has a good reason for finding you."

The door opened and even with sensitive Koopa hearing, Sakuro's steps were hard to hear. Did the man take years of ballet or something? Bowser promptly rose from the bed, thinking how improper it would be for him to be seen sitting on the empress' bed. The Emperor appeared, nodding to his mother before surprising the _hell _out of him.

"King Bowser." Sakuro didn't just bow. He bowed _low. _It was definitely something a man of his station should not be doing because as the ruling entity he had only equals and subordinates.

"Uh..." Bowser scratched at the back of his head unsurely.

"King Bowser Sarasaland is _very _appreciative of the aid you provided her emperor, and we of the Sarasalandian court are not only thankful but we are also indebted to you," Sakuro finally straightened up, looking him dead in the eye, "I was hoping you would join me for a drink."

"That's not really necessary," Bowser shook his head, "Just think nothing of it...we're allies right?"

Sakuro arched a brow, "I was hoping you would join me for an _alcoholic _drink?"

Bowser froze; well when _booze_ was involved that changed _everything. _King Bowser chuckled, "...Yeah okay. I guess I can do that."

Grammy laughed as Sakuro actually smirked, "Excellent, I was just heading out to the veranda, if you would like to accompany me? Or should I return for you at another time...?"

Bowser's red eyes flicked onto Grammy who gently shooed him away, "Yes...Let's go now..."

"Superb," Sakuro's expression didn't change but his entire presence seemed lighter, more relaxed, "Then follow me, if you will."

The emperor swept through the hall with Bowser's lumbering, thunderous footfall on his heels. Most people would be terrified to have their back exposed to King Bowser. But with each loud, rattling step Bowser took, Sakuro could almost pinpoint exactly where he was.

They traversed a few more long, amply decorated golden and orange halls before stepping outside. Compared to the generous air-conditioned palace, the desert air felt like a dry, hot pant of breath and would have been unbearable if not for the shade.

The wooden balcony underfoot was warm with a perfect picturesque view of the distant golden sands. Sakuro motioned for Bower to take his seat before sliding into his own.

It wasn't unnoticed how the staff had provided a chair big and durable enough to hold his weight and already the table was set and awaiting them with cutlery and decorative tableware. Bowser smirked; _ah, so this definitely wasn't impromptu. The emperor had planned to ask me out here. Huh well, can't say these Desert people aren't trying…_

A servant brought a frosted glass pitcher filled with amber liquid. Sakuro quietly muttered his thanks before peering at the human-sized goblets and then studying the bulky Koopa king.

Sakuro stared a few seconds longer at Bowser before quietly acquiescing, "Hmm, we're going to need a rather _large_ mug for you, aren't we?"

The servant tried to hide his amusement as the king laughed in a deep, rumbling laugh, "Or I'll just drink straight from the bottle. It'll be just like college."

Sakuro shot him a disapproving look but said nothing edgewise. One of the servants managed to dig up a suitably large goblet for the Darklandian king to use.

"Ah that's right," Sakuro mused to himself, "Sarasaland has quarterly meetings with King Doomba of the Goombalands, and he's quite a large fellow as well. The palace always keeps several spare larger mugs for him. I hope these are up to par for you."

"This works," Bowser rumbled softly.

Sakuro took his drink 'on the rocks' and after carefully eyeing his large goblet, Bowser finally took a sip; the liquor was nowhere near strong enough to give him anything remotely close to a buzz, but the taste was rich and buttery, "This isn't half bad."_ For human booze._

"Desert mead," Sakuro hummed softly, "A Sarasalandian specialty which our ancestors have been refining it for centuries."

Bowser smirked, "Whipped out the good stuff, huh?"

"Today seems like that day, King Bowser, wouldn't you agree?"

"Sure..."

When the servant went to refill Bowser's mug, the emperor waved him off, "Take a break, I'll handle this."

The servant seemed unsure but graciously uttered thanks, bowed and then quietly left. Bowser arched a brow; Sakuro was certainly going to extreme lengths to talk to him alone, wasn't he?

Sakuro mindlessly refilled Bowser's large mug, "That isn't going to compromise you, will it?"

"Wha? _This_?" Bowser laughed, "Koopa alcohol has to be involved before I get into trouble. And it's alright, Emperor, I can pour my own glass, you don't need to do it."

"Ah interesting. Never knew there was such a thing," the emperor hummed, refilling his own glass.

A long, winding stretch of silence grew between them. There was no tension in the air but Bowser had always hated silence of any kind. It was _awkward._

To occupy his time, Bowser tapped his claws against the table, counted the bubbles in his drink, but the silence was still annoying him. Silence in Koopa culture was never a good thing, the only time silence permeated was when someone was sick, or when someone was dead. Until then, Koopas were always loud and boisterous.

When Koopas were happy, they shouted, when Koopas were pissed, they shouted, and when Koopas were sad they shouted and cried and carried on. And when Koopas were in love, they loudly declared their passion in a bursting explosive display of amor and then they _very loudly _acted on that love _all night long_.

So in every part of Koopa society, where sound and clamor was necessary, sitting here with the laconic emperor was driving him _mad. _Whereas Sakuro seemed to relish silence; eyes far away and lost within his own vast mindscape as he quietly sipped at his beverage.

_Okaaay this is weiiiiird. The man invites me to have a drink and hasn't said one damn word. Stars this is awkward…_

Bowser released a mental hurrah when he heard Sakuro's tenor, "So King Bowser. By now you've known how acquisitions in the Aqualands has erred terribly wrong."

Bowser watched the emperor with a perfectly cool expression, "Care to spill how badly things went?"

The Darklandian king arched a brow when Sakuro finished another glass. And that makes four. _Slow down Emp, no one wants to see your hoity toity ass trashed._

Yet again Sakuro filled both of their glasses—didn't he just say he would refill his own glass—and this time he took another measured drawl, as if knowing he was inching closer and closer to his invisible limit, "Nothing was accomplished. Basically Prince Taurus seized the opportunity as a platform to insult Sarasaland in any form possible. Including her royal ladies."

Bowser's relaxed visage tightened, "What did he _say_? Did that assclown say anything about Fl—Princess Sarasaland? The empress? I've been looking for a reason to—"

Sakuro's stern visage was slowly disintegrating, "Did you know about the stint between his grandfather and my mother? Prince Taurus relished throwing that in my face. I had absolutely no clue about it..."

Bowser frowned at the unusual disruption, "Only because the queen told me herself. She figured Princess Sarasaland and I would have found out in a matter of time anyways."

"You know, if it wasn't for you, I would be dead," Sakuro mused aloud, "That or horrendously tortured."

And then killed once Taurus extracted enough intel or simply became bored with seeing him writhe. Under normal circumstances Sakuro was like a well-fortified wall made of star-titanium.

Nobody got through that shit. But slowly the liquor was crumbling that impenetrable armor and wearing him away. The emperor's cheeks took on a rosy hue, "I could see it in their eyes King Bowser."

"Whose?"

"The Aqualandian guards. It was as if they were waiting to kill me. They were just one drop, one click away from jumping on me," Sakuro spoke softer, eyes narrowed.

Bowser smirked dryly, "Well, I dunno what's worse, that you could _see_ them coming, how you could see the venom and hatred in their eyes or that I was completely clueless and didn't see it coming."

Sakuro looked pensive, "It just shows that whether or not the Aqualands decides to show their true face, whatever it is, it's absolutely wicked."

The emperor peered at Bowser curiously, pausing before he spoke, "I'm confused."

"About what?"

"Why did you save my life?" Sakuro barely titled his head, "I have not been kind to you in the slightest. Maybe even cold."

"_Maybe_?" Bowser arched a brow, smirking.

Sakuro looked _quite _uncomfortable before admitting,"..._Very well_. I've been aloof. But that doesn't answer my question."

Bowser peered at the emperor, dually finding himself befuddled and amused; was the stiff, uppity, snooty snoot emperor drunk? Maybe closer to tipsy because Sakuro's eyes still had a bright clarity to them. He had drank just enough to be relaxed.

"Honestly?" Bowser shrugged noncommittally, "'Cause it was the right thing to do. That and I can't stand the thought of F—Princess Daisy being sad. And the empress too. They needed you to come back alive. Also Taurus got me good with that cowardly goombashit he pulled. I _really _didn't want to see that asshole best someone else again."

"I see..." The emperor's voice was soft, "I hope this doesn't feel like an interrogation, I'm just trying to—"

"—get to know one of the suitors who wants to marry your daughter," Bowser's smirk was sharp and self indulgent, "Don't worry, I get it."

Sakuro arched an eyebrow, "Then you wouldn't mind answering an inquiry that's been bothering me for some time…?"

"Shoot."

"_Do _you care for my daughter?"

_Oh shit._

"Uh…" For the first time during their informal kickback, Bowser lost his cool.

The emperor's eyes went from being soft to calcified stone within seconds. Sakuro moved his drink aside and slowly leaned in towards the king, "I'll have you know King Bowser that I am _very_ aquatinted with your past. You dated and slept with an innumerable amount of Koopa ladies."

Stars here it comes; the past he can't seem to ever escape. Could he get a get out of free jail pass here something? No, fuc—_sleeping_ _with_ an innumerable horde of Koopette models and actresses wasn't an honorable thing to do and no, it wasn't responsible or setting a good precedence for his children, but if _you _had survived a divorce with the manipulative Clawdia and her bloodthirsty father; you _too _would have to find a good outlet.

And yes, sleeping with hot, airheaded Koopettes who made centerfold of playKoopa had the added benefit of greatly pissing Clawdia off.

"Remember what I said at last night's dinner?" Bowser smirked, "I'm a changed Koopa. That's who I was in the past. Besides Emperor, I think you and I both know that I'm not the worst person you have to worry about courting your daughter."

Sakuro grunted, whether in affirmation or acceptance was unknown, "But you never answered my question. Do you _care _for her? If you are indeed her friend, then you know _just_ how painfully naive she is of something…_things._"

_Oh you know, things involving sex especially._

It was one of the hardest things for him to do, but Bowser managed to peer at Sakuro dead in the eye with a straight-face, "Then let me say Emp that straight up I do care for your daughter. I'd bleed to protect her and outside of my children, she's one of the few people I'd willingly die protecting. Her and the empress both."

Sakuro stared hard as if trying to measure the truth behind such powerful words. Once Sakuro came to a conclusion, he nodded curtly, "So I can trust that you won't...try to take advantage of her? This entire debacle with the Aqualands has been hard on her. She's been smiling and laughing but she's been hiding it all."

Bowser didn't even have to wonder this one. His stern visage even softened several notches, "Emperor, your daughter is safe with me. And when I give my promise, my word is gold: I'm not going to fight with Mario, hell, I'll probably scream and try to egg him on a bit, but I won't fight. And Princess Sarasaland is safe with me. She's—" Bowser choked on his words, face flushing slightly as he realized he had said too much, "obviously beautiful but I respect her."

Sakuro nodded as Bowser sat back and relaxed. For once the silence between them was comfortable and resting in the desert heat under the cool shade was very relaxing.

Sakuro turned to look at Bowser, "So just to be clear, you're not—"

"_Yes!"_ Bowser snapped, face flushing strawberry-red as a few embers fluttered from his maw, "_No_ sex, _no _fondling, no _nothing_. _I've got it_."

Sakuro didn't quite smirk, but the smugness was definitely there, "_Good_."

They had sat outside on the veranda for a few hours, until morning flowed into noon and with it came a scorching increase of temperature. Sakuro rose to his feet and Bowser followed, taking that as his cue.

"I rather enjoyed myself..." Sakuro stated.

Bowser laughed, smirking rakishly, "Don't sound _too _surprised, Emperor."

Sakuro didn't quite smile, but his eyes were bright with amusement, "Alright. Fair enough. But before you go, I have one last question."

Bowser, still good-humored and grinning, nodded, "Have at it."

"Do you think all governments are corrupt?"

Bowser blinked twice before laughing hard and long, "Yep. That's common knowledge."

Sakuro frowned, not at his lackadaisical attitude over something so severe, but at the thought of it, "You truly believe that?"

"Oh yeah," the Koopa king was still grinning, "What you should ask is how _much _corruption there is."

"I'm not corrupt..." Sakuro defended immediately, trying to disprove Bowser's statement. But then he felt childish for saying such a thing.

"No, you're not," Bowser nodded his head, "I was actually surprised by such a thing. Usually it's the kings who are the most corrupt. Honestly Emperor, you, among a select handful of sovereigns are honest, upstanding people. You try to do what's best and turn away bribes and try to fix inequality."

"But you still believe the Sarasalandian monarchy is corrupt?"

"All are," Bowser shrugged, "It's not you, but somehow, somewhere, someone's abusing their power. If it's not the king, then it's the council. You know why I like Kitsune of Land's End?"

Sakuro's mouth twisted to the side, "I do _not._ But I will play along and ask why?"

"Because she doesn't pretend to be anything she isn't," he smirked, "She openly takes bribes and free stuff from her people, she doesn't think she's better than anyone of her citizens and she even drinks and gets wasted with them. She's their leader but she's still one of them. Her ruling style is very un...well, unhuman like. As the Darklandian King, I can talk to _any _of my citizens, and they all know I legitimately care for them. I don't get that vibe with most human rulers."

Sakuro studied Bowser before turning back to the castle, "Thank you for your time, King Bowser."

"You're welcome," and with a smirk, Bowser gave a deep Sarasalandian bow before turning and stomping towards the door. Sakuro managed to hide his stupor but quickly followed after him.

Had he misjudged Bowser? Behind all that temper and attitude was a—the emperor couldn't believe he was going to think this but—relatively good Koopa. Maybe not good, but a Koopa who definitely had principles and morals.

_Huh. Interesting, I definitely misjudged him._

* * *

><p>There was a soft wrap at the emperor's door. Dinner had just been served at Castle Sarasaland and the emperor was holed up in his study, buried up to his elbows in executive orders, tariffs, and proclamations. The emperor finally peered up from a treaty he had been diligently rereading, "Come in."<p>

The door opened, spilling in light from the adjacent hallway as an elderly councilor swept in, folding into a deep bow, "Emperor."

"Councilor Ztarlight," Sakuro nodded in acknowledgement, "All is well I presume?"

The councilor smiled warmly, "Indeed and good evening, Emperor."

Sakuro made a smooth gesture towards a nearby chair, "Help yourself to a seat, will you?"

Iscariot Ztarlight had been an elite Sarasalandian councilman since the dawn of Empress Meringue's reign. Despite all his decades of service to the Desert crown, there was very little _good_ about Ztarlight.

And quite frankly, the man had always rubbed Sakuro the wrong way. As king, Sakuro had never held the unreasonable expectation for his councilors to be perfect, but he definitely held his ruling class to a higher standard than the average Desert citizen.

Those who were privy to the mantle of leadership and power should exercise honor and discipline and kindness when it came to governing people. Though it was a councilor's post to bring justice, so too was it their duty to uphold mercy.

And Councilman Ztarlight was certainly _not_ that example of shining integrity and honor. With Ztarlight, there seemed to always be an abundance of skeletons overflowing from his closet. One thing Sakuro abhorred more than anything else was hypocrisy and the man was probably the biggest, most two-faced individual he knew.

The best example of this was how Councilman Ztarlight was hardnosed, contemptuous, unforgiving and _very _vocal about his condemnation against women—whores he called them—who gave birth out of wedlock.

As turnabout was fair play, Sakuro could only laugh with sour amusement when he heard of the patronizing Ztarlight himself having had _several_ illicit affairs and siring several children outside of his marriage.

And if that weren't bad enough, Ztarlight's son—a disgusting, lecherous womanizing fool who had absolutely nothing of worth to his name except for his family's vast fortunes—had expressed interest in _Chisana_'s hand for marriage.

Sakuro would rather swim in the foul underground sewage system than marry his daughter off to the likes of _that. _It was no surprise really when Ztarlight had been furious at the dismissal and from then on had been completely against any new trades, tariffs, agreements—anything really—that Sakuro proposed to his governing council.

Months later it came to light how Ztarlight's lecherous son had been harassing several of the palace's maids. One maid had ran to the emperor in tears, spilling all the awful things the councilman's son had said and done to some of the poor maids.

Ever since then, Ztarlight had been treading lightly, staying inconspicuously under the radar and going above and beyond to remain in the Emperor's favor. By being a _sycophant_.

Sakuro intentionally made a show of setting his documents aside and motioned his subordinate to have a seat; keep friends close and foes within arm reach, "How may I help you, Councilman?"

"Emperor!" And let the unnecessary flattery begin, "I just wanted to say that your speech was quite touching. We of the council should have never withheld our beloved Empress' fate from you. Of course _I_ was of the mind to tell you, but the Sarasalandian council moves as one. To defect from the council is like the hand wanting to be separate from the body."

Sakuro nodded mutely, letting the majority of the sycophancy go in one ear and out the other, "State your business, please."

"Emperor," Ztarlight folded his hands together, and though he was smiling, the warmth didn't reach his eyes, "it has come to the..._notice_ of a few councilmen that you had spent time...with King Bowser this afternoon."

"And what of it?"

"_Sire_," Ztarlight sighed with the same exasperation an older sibling would have towards their younger sibling, "While the Sarasalandian council _appreciates _your respect for cultural diversity, we've been thinking that it's time to focus on other things."

Sakuro's face remained carefully blank, though he acknowledged the statement with an arched brow, "'_Other things'?"_

"Sire, I understand the benefits of having a camaraderie with the Darklands. Sarasaland has been _flourishing _under the new treaty, let's not deny that. But this entire business about having King Bowser as a _suitor _for our princess is the real problem," Ztarlight laughed incredulously, "It's _ridiculous_! There are numerous issues with even considering a courtship with a _Koopa_."

Sakuro carefully interlocked his fingers, coolly watching his subordinate; to be honest, this wasn't all that big of a surprise. One part of his council seemed to be heavily steeped in tradition and the 'old way'. It was keeping the 'old way' alive that kept women out of the esteemed council.

It crossed Sakuro's mind several times that Lady Angora, who did much unofficial diplomatic work for Sarasaland would have been a fine councilor. Also the councilors who wished to uphold the 'old ways' were the same people some twenty odd years ago who believed that he was far too immature and too young to rule.

_He showed those old bats. _

Ztarlight was definitely a part of the council that wished to keep the 'old way' alive and flourishing and that also included the subtle, well hidden distrust—_hatred_—of the Koopa species.

"I think it's time we started being realistic about certain things," Ztarlight was careful to keep his tone light.

"Such as?"

Ztarlight chuckled darkly, "Considering the Canine boy was bad _enough_, but a courtship with a _Koopa_? Let alone the demon king of them all. It's _cute _how Princess Sarasaland got to _choose _her suitors but she's clearly made poor choices. My Stars, what will our allies think? King Koopa is for the lack of a better term a monster. He has endangered your niece, Princess Peach. But even beyond that, a union between a Koopa a human is _unholy._"

Sakuro studied Ztarlight for a moment before nodding, "Acknowledged Councilor. Anything else?"

Ztarlight froze, "..._What?_ Si—Emperor? Did you _hear _me? This is a serious _problem_!"

"I did," Sakuro was back to looking at dense, fine-print papers, "A few of the councilors are against King Bowser's inclusion in our princess' courtship. Understood."

Ztarlight gaped wordlessly, staring at the emperor in sheer disbelief before he pulled himself together. The councilman laughed incredulously, "Sir. This—This is _serious. _ This, the situation with King Bowser cannot stand. Sarasaland is inadvertently sending the message that we are supportive of a union between Koopas and humans. Such a thing cannot function in our society. You are royalty. You, the princess and the empress are under scrutiny enough. This will not stand amongst kings and sovereignty. We will lose allies and alliances over this travesty."

Sakuro finally paused, "Sarasaland has always wished to promote equality. I never knew promoting new relationships between two kingdoms would be looked down upon so severely."

"Sire, promoting new relationships is fine. In fact, encouraging new_ Human_ relationships are _great_," then something dark materialized within Ztarlight's eyes, "The problem is involving those Koopas. And King Bowser is the evil wretch that leads them all. We cannot allow him to soil Sarasaland's name. To soil our fair princess."

Sakuro made a show of slowly moving his eyes up the council's form until they locked gazes. Ztarlight halted; fire burned, but the emperor's stare was nothing but frost and ice and everything about his glare blazed, "If it was not for the aid of King Bowser, I would be either dead, or tortured. And honestly, I believe that King Bowser—though boorish and at times profane—is a good Koopa. Perhaps even good enough to be considered for our fair princess' hand in marriage. You councilor, with your long lists of fallacies are the _last _man worthy to judge King Bowser."

That insult did just as Sakuro wanted and Ztarlight's face was slowly turning red, "This is outr—"

Sakuro raised his hand to cut him off, "_And_ I will hear nothing else. I would prefer if you utilized all this aggression and energy and invested it into a more suitable area. There are tariffs to be read, press conferences to be had and announcements to be made."

Ztarlight's expression remained balefully cold; it was clear he wanted to say more, but he chose to remain silent on the matter, "...Very well then Emperor. Thank you for taking time out of your pressing schedule. It is getting late and I must get back to my villa now."

"Indeed, have a good evening, Councilman."

"And you as well, Sire."

The councilman bowed before turning and exiting the study. Sakuro paused, peering at the door Ztarlight had passed through just seconds ago. He hoped this would be the _last _of such foolishness. But only an idiot would believe that this would be the last time someone broached the topic of King Bowser marrying his daughter.

Sakuro paused, suddenly thinking back to Bowser's words earlier in the day. _All governments were crooked to varying degrees_. It was always easy to point out someone else's flaws, but it was always hard to turn that critical eye upon one's self. Was Sarasaland crooked too? He knew of a handful of councilors like Ztarlight who were wayward but were they enough to make Sarasaland corrupt?

Sakuro rubbed at his eyes tiredly; this was all terribly exhausting. As much as his vision blurred and his mind began to wander, he steeled his resolve to finish work even if it meant retiring at an ungodly hour—

The door suddenly burst open with a loud thud and only one person was that _stupid _to kick in Emperor Sarasaland's door like a _cad._

"_Sakky_!" Apricotto cried out happily, barging into his personal study, "I _knew_ I'd find you here, holed up like a standoffish gnome!"

The emperor was so tired, he couldn't employ his usual razor-sharp wit, "...I'm _not _a gnome..."

"Well!" his blond brother clapped his hands together happily, "Get out. Wrap it up, turn it off, unplug it, leave it. You're done for the day."

"I haven't even put a reasonable dent in these—"

"Don't care!" Apricotto sang happily, "Either you put your stuff away now or I do it for you. And do you _really _want that?"

The last time Apricotto filed some important papers for him, they'd gone missing and those that he did find had childish doodles drawn in the margins. It was _political suicide_ to let Apricotto touch _anything _important; Toadsworth had learned this many years ago. In the political arena, Apricotto was a face: he could smile and laugh and give speeches and charm most people but he was most definitely _not _a brain.

"Alright," Sakuro acquiescenced, "I'm cleaning up and calling it a day."

"Great!" Apricotto beamed, "I've already asked some of the staff to make us some good ole starbeer floats! Think about it, when was the last time you had a starbeer float?"

Sakuro closed his eyes, "I can't honestly remember..."

"And that needs to be fixed, now. Now up!" Apricotto wrapped an arm around his brother, leading him out the study and heading towards the palace's kitchen, "Do you remember the princess of the Piranha lands? I think it's your lucky day 'cause I can _totally _set you up with her!"

* * *

><p>The sky was just beginning to purple with the picturesque transition from sunset to dusk. I had just stepped out of a steaming shower, slapped on a baby blue silk robe Peach had gotten me for a birthday present. It must have been expensive as it was sinfully comfortable and the blue silk was long enough to billow around my ankles.<p>

My hair was damp and drying as I combed through the tangles and curls. Firefly was wide awake and happy, swinging from side to side and humming a tune.

I fed him a treat before slipping into a spot in front of my vanity, concentrating on attacking a particularly vicious tangle. I paused, thinking I heard a loud scratching sound but quickly dismissed it.

Then I really jumped when a booming, laughing voice called, _"_ _O Juliette, __Juliette!__Wherefore art thou Juliette~?__"_

"Wha...?" Firefly and I exchanged a glance before I peered in the direction of the new voice. It sounded slightly muffled but it was definitely coming from my balcony. I thought I recognized the voice; it sounded a _lot_ like Bowser but the only way up was...

Let me double check on this, because if someone _thought_ they were going to sneak their way into _my _bedchambers, then they were _wrong_. I'd hand them their ass on a platter and then make them _eat it_.

Okay, kinda disgusting, but it gets my point across.

I quickly marched through my room and to my balcony where the cold air nipped at my drying skin. I was growing more and more furious at the thought of someone trying to come into my room, my sanctuary. I cracked my knuckles and wiggled my fingers; needed my hands relaxed if I was going to be punching someone out soon.

Glaring, I peered over the banister of my balcony and my jaw _dropped_.

There was definitely someone scaling the side of the castle wall, but it wasn't an intruder or a creep. It was Bowser. Yes. _Bowser_, injured King Bowser was using his sharp claws to climb up the side of my wall with a crazy, wild grin.

_What the hell is he thinking!?_

"_Bowser!?"_ I gawped. I hastily slapped a palm over my mouth and hissed through my teeth, security was circling the palace, "What are you _doing!?"_

Bowser must have been showing off because he actually lifted one hand from the side of the castle and waved, "Hey Flower! Just the person I was looking for!" He laughed, "I'll be up in a minute Honey pie!"

My head was on a swivel, "_H-Honey pie!?_ You gigantic _tool! _Someone will _see _you!"

"I'll be up in a flash," he inched up the wall, still beaming madly, "Your handsome king has come to see you."

I rubbed my eyes to make sure this was real; yep and it was. Bowser really was climbing his way up here and was spouting terrible Shyguyspearian quotes. The cool chill of the wind was unusually unpleasant and I realized my robe was falling open.

_Sheyt!_

My cheeks heated as I quickly sealed it shut and peered down at Bowser. With one last stretch of his arm, he gripped the top of the banister and grunted, pulling himself over the ledge. Slightly winded, Bowser rested his hands on his hips, still grinning like an idiot.

"What the hell were you thinking!?" I growled, "You're still hurt and you could have fallen off!"

"I had it under control," he smirked, "Besides, it's just like a fairytale. A deviously handsome king coming to see a princess...climbing the treacherous towers..."

"Get in the room before someone sees you. Hurry!"

And with no more goading, we stepped back into my warm bedchambers. Bowser peered around, smirking, "_Mmm_. It smells just like you in here."

He made his way to Firefly and pet him, inciting a happy purr from my affectionate pet, "And I see Fire's doing well."

I moved to sit in my vanity and crossed my legs, "So you couldn't have, oh, I don't know walked through the door like a normal person?"

Bowser tapped his nose, "Your security guard is just around the corner. I can smell that guy...And he needs a _shower_."

I laughed, "Leave Larry alone."

"See!" Bowser guffawed, "You even know _who _I'm talking about."

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, "Now leave him alone. His girlfriend of eight years recently dumped him and he's been having a hard time. He ran into Father's study one day and sobbed his eyes out. Father gave him the week off and this is his first week back."

Bowser circled my room, taking in my trophies, peering at all the pictures on my wall and finally finished his miniature tour by making his way to my bed and laying on it, resting his arms behind his head, "Hmm."

"What?" I asked.

Still smirking, his eyes slipped closed, "There's something peaceful about being in here. Can't exactly put my finger on it. Maybe it's because this is your safe space. Definitely has good vibes in here."

I took a seat beside him, just taking in the friendly ambiance between us. I thought about running my hands through his mane but decided against it, it seemed too forward and too affectionate. He chuckled, before looking over, "Hey, wanna play a game?"

"Sure! But what?"

"Well we can't do anything that'll make _too_ much noise," I'm not sure if he just made a really inside joke, but I noticed the mischievous stretch of his wolfish grin, "I know. I'll raze you with questions and you answer. If it's something you hate, give it a one. Something you love, give it a ten. Easy, right?"

That sounded easy enough. I shrugged, "Sure. Okay. But I ask you first! Oh wait! Before we start, I've always wanted to do something. Are you too hurt to tell me how hard I punch?"

"Hell no," he laughed, "You _really _want to test how strong your punches are?"

"Yeah!"

He shook his head, still smirking, "You really _are _a tomboy. Well whatever toots your horn, Hun."

I laughed as Bowser smirked, opening the palm of his left hand. He sat up from the bed and motioned me forward in a macho, 'bring it' fashion. I took a step back, bounced on toes before sending a furious blow into his large palm, "_Hiya!_" He watched, perfectly amused.

I raised my eyebrows, "Well? Where was that on the pain scale? One is sad and ten is like you're gonna go and cry to your mother."

He smirked, "Two."

"What?!" I frowned, "_A two_!? Aww _c'mon_!"

"You should be happy," he was still grinning, "with most humans I don't feel a thing. Anytime I can _feel _something, I know a human is fairly strong. You, Dogboy and that crazy Canine queen are pretty strong humans."

I smirked, "Mario's punches?"

He stopped smiling and glowered, "Seven. He probably injects steroids into his ass to get that strong."

I burst with laughter, "How much do you like Luigi?"

"Hmm," Bowser rubbed his chin, peering upward with thought, "If a five means I won't kill you, then Greenstache is a seven."

A five means he won't kill you, not that he doesn't _like _you, but it means he won't _kill you. _I see Bowser's likability scale is kind of screwed up. Someone I like less than a five isn't someone I'm going to automatically _destroy. _

"Wolfe?"

"Eight surprisingly. That scrawny bastard has wormed his way into my good side."

I laughed disbelievingly, "Bowser. Wolfe is _not _scrawny. He's muscular and tall."

Bowser smirked, "He looks kind of skinny to me."

"Because you're absolutely _huge_!" I laughed, "How much do you like Ryu?"

His expression darkened as he growled roughly, "_Zero_."

"What?!" I laughed "Why?!"

"Ask your next _question_," he growled with no humor.

I laughed, deciding to switch gears since I could sense it was truly irritating, "How bad does Wario smell?"

The ploy worked and Bowser immediately laughed, "Nine point four."

"How cute do you think Junior is?"

"Ten."

"Aww!"

"Next."

"But Bowwy—!"

"NEXT."

I laughed softly; that's right, the _oh so _glorious King Bowwy doesn't like showing his mushy gushy feelings, "How much do you hate Mario?"

"_Ugggggh_. _Ten._ Twelve after this morning," he growled.

"How often do your Koopa hormones flare up?"

Bowser blinked, appearing startled, "Oh. Uh, they just...Well, it just depends. I only react around certain people. Certain events trigger...things..."

I smirked, "How about around me? And by the way, I need a _number_."

For some reason, Bowser appeared slightly embarrassed; I must have got him _good!_ Bowser scratched the back of his head with his usual nervous gesture, "Uh? A-Around you? It's like a n-nine. A nine point four."

I smirked, realizing I could ride this train for awhile, "And how _nice _do I smell to you?"

His eyes narrowed, "Just wait until it's my turn. Just you wait you long-legged—"

"Just answer~!" I laughed.

He coughed, doing a terrible job at hiding his blush and I even thought I saw his tail wagging. I covered my mouth, hiding my laughter.

"T-Ten..." he whispered as I laughed loudly. His glare, though embarrassed, was intense enough to cut stone, "Hahaha, Laugh it up all you want!"

"How much control did you have during the Koopa Moon? You know when you—"

"Zero," Bowser's frown darkened his entire expression, "A whopping zero."

"How much did you like being married?"

Bowser shrugged, "A three. And only because of the sex."

He laughed when I turned my head away, "You're so crude sometimes. How much do you like being king?"

"The parts involving meeting and interacting with my citizens, it's a nine. The part where I deal with stiff-ass councilors and paperwork, a one."

"How much do you like Grammy?" I smiled.

Bowser chuckled, "Ten. Maybe an eleven. She's funny, nice, spunky and so...Grammyish."

I laughed and the next question I thought of, I knew would make things a little more _interesting. _I couldn't help the stutter that impeded my speech, "H-How much do you like...my...uh..."

He raised a brow, interest already peaked, "Yes...?"

"M-My uh..." I cleared my throat, trying to ignore my breaking voice.

Bowser was full-blown grinning now, "_Yeeeees..._?"

I took a deep sigh, and looked away from him when my face turned red, " m-my legs...?"

"_Ten."_ He didn't hesitate as he grinned slyly, stare brightening with predatory intent.

"How..." I halted.

Bowser smirked, "You know the rules, gotta say the question, Flower."

I hesitated, but definitely not for the reasons that he was thinking of. Bowser thought I was going to ask an embarrassing question, but this question might dig up old feelings that he's been trying to avoid. I released a sigh before speaking, "How...How pretty do you think Clawdia is?"

As forecasted, his good humor faded and his eyes narrowed into slits. Bowser remained quiet for a moment, studying my expression before growling, "Nine point eight."

_Wheeeeeeeew, he thinks she's pretty hot_. _And she is but it...kind of hurt to hear that. _My heart sank, and a bitter raze of envy spiked my blood; I really couldn't—didn't want to think of anymore questions after that.

Though divorced, and despite how much he _hated _her, he couldn't deny that he thought Clawdia was all kinds of levels of beautiful. I shrugged limply, "Umm...that's all I can think of."

He smirked, "My turn?"

I nodded, walking over to Firefly and picking him up. I sat on the bed and placed him on my lap, "Alright, your move."

Bowser cracked his knuckles and laughed, "How cute is Fireflower?"

"Ten," I smiled, tickling my cute pet who giggled happily and wiggled.

He grinned slyly, "How friggin' _jacked_ am I?"

With half a laugh, I rolled my eyes, "...Stars help me...Ten."

"Yeahaha _baby!_" He burst into jubilant laughter, flexing one powerful bicep with self indulgent relish. I shook my head, laughing as he pondered his next question.

"How much," he suddenly sneered and looked away from me, "do you like _that _Shinobi?"

"Hmm, like how?"

He still looked displeased, as if just mentioning Ryu left a foul aftertaste in his mouth, "Just answer."

"Eight point nine."

He glared, growling as he wound his left hand into a tight fist. As he did so, his knuckles popped audibly, "How much would you like seeing me punch him the hell _out_?!"

"Bowser!"

"Answer!"

I gave a lucrative glare, "Zero!"

He laughed softly and ran his hand through his mane, and when he spoke, he had a growl in his words, "How _attractive _am I?"

I blushed, jaw dropping unintelligibly as Bowser boomed with laughter, "_Pass!_"

He laughed, grinning with malicious glee, "Gotta say!"

I looked away, face neon-hot, "I-I am _not_ answering _that_!"

He rolled his eyes, still grinning, "_Fine_. But one pass is all you get, you long-legged cheater."

How attractive was he? Did this selfish, overgrown turtle _really_ just ask me that!? However, before I could even stop myself, the number _nine_ materialized in my thoughts. It embarrassed the hell out of me; a nine was a pretty frickin' cute guy in my opinion and I thought he was an nine!?

Ryu was an effortless ten...Silver and Luigi were an eight, Wolfe was an eight point five and Taurus may have been a self absorbed jackass, but he was a level nine self absorbed jackass. But since he's psychotic and unfeeling, his horrid personality gives him a grand total score of zero. Maybe even a negative score.

Bowser smirked, watching me closely as the last of my blush faded, "How attractive is Peach?"

I didn't even think, "Ten."

"That pink-headed chick?"

"Lazinne?" I thought of the mysterious White Mage, from her sparkling blue eyes all the way to her irregular, sleek rose bob, "She's beautiful, nine point eight."

"How much do you like my kisses?" He grinned smugly.

"..."

Bowser boomed with laughter again; hmph, he was certainly getting a good laugh off of me, "Come_ oooon_, you've got to answer!"

I felt my face flush and when I tried to hide my face, Firefly tried to lick my cheek, "I'm not saying!"

"Oh no you don't!" He was grinning rakishly, eyes narrow and teeth sharp, "I had to answer your stupid hormone question and I let you slide on the other one. This you've got to say!"

My face was hotter than an oven as I quietly mumbled, "N-Nine...point nine?"

I was _not _going to inflate his massive ego and give him a _ten. _His smirk was completely absorbed, "Oh _my_. The innocent tomboy likes my kisses that much, huh? What makes them so _good_?"

"Bowser!" I snapped, cheeks dark pink, "J-Just ask your next question!"

He chuckled, "Fine. How much of a dumbass is your Uncle?"

"_Bowser!"_ I gasped, scandalized and yet all too amused at the same time, "He's my _uncle_! I'm not going to say anything bad about him! I love him every much!"

"_Answer_~" he laughed, half singing his words.

"A...A nine," and with that we both laughed stupidly.

His expression softened, "How much...do you want children?"

I hummed, thinking it over. I thought of all the times I picked up, spun, played with and fed Junior and each time made me appreciate motherhood a little more, "Nine."

"How worried are you about this Aqualands situation?" he asked, voice soft.

My brows furrowed as I peered at Firefly, "Ten."

"How much...do you trust that I'll protect you?" he asked, his expression was intentionally blank.

"Ten," I smiled.

He smirked, "How...happy do I make you?"

I didn't think about it and my smile only grew larger. I peered up at him from beneath my lashes, "Ten."

He smirked and I noticed his tail was wagging, "I don't need to ask anymore after that."

I smiled; underneath all the fire and ego, there was something admirably great about Bowser. He really was my best friend and outside of Peach I don't think there was anyone who knew me better.

He understood and tolerated my odd humor, he could read my body language and knew when something was amiss and most importantly he had my best intentions at heart, even if it meant going against the tide. Hell, our entire friendship went against what was conventional.

As Bowser studied my wall filled with pictures of my family and friends, I carefully set Firefly back upon his bed. I smoothed out my robe and discreetly checked in my vanity to make sure my hair wasn't crazy and out of order.

"Hey Bowser?" My voice came out far softer and far more feminine than I intended. In fact it attracted Bowser's immediate attention, "You...wanna...sit next to me? So we could talk for a bit?"

He blinked several times before laughing, "What? Did you_ really_ ask if I want to? Hell yeah I do!"

He carefully took a seat beside me, making sure to slowly transfer his weight into the bed, "What are you thinking Dollface?"

I released a sigh, peering at my wall. My heart was thudding, pounding wildly against my chest. I kept thinking about my earlier conversation with Peach. I could see Ryu, Wolfe, Silver and Luigi and imagine how I had a future with them and I never really thought of it before, but Bowser was amazing.

I closed my eyes before I spoke, trying to relax, "Do you have plans...on remarrying?"

After a stretch of silence, I peered at Bowser. His expression was surprisingly thoughtful, "The council's gonna want me to remarry," he peered at me with a lopsided smirk, "There's some kind of stupid royal rule about married monarchs being more respectable and shit."

"Do you want to remarry, for _you?" _I asked softly.

Bowser made a sound between a hum and a sigh, "Yeah I do. I know, it's probably a large surprise to you," then he peered at me with a smirk, "Surprised?"

"Honestly, not really. You have lots of Koopalings to look after, and I can't see you desiring anything but a substantial relationship."

"Yeah," he spoke softly, "That sounds right. You know, after the divorce with Clawd I..."

He paused and I could sense that there was something about his past he was avoiding like the plague. I smirked, "This is a judgement-free zone, so go right ahead and say what's on your mind."

"Well truthfully, after the divorce I had a _lot _of meaningless relationships. If you could even call them that," he laughed dryly, peering down at his knees, "It was only about sex. But really good, _dastardly _sex. Like the _reaaaal_ naughty stuff. If you're not breaking furniture and swinging off chandeliers, then it ain't right, " Bowser laughed exuberantly.

_Oh my Stars._

I gaped at him incredulously, wondering if the mental filter in his brain didn't _work._ When he looked in my direction, I quickly glanced away, hoping my face wasn't too red; _geesh, this Koopa could be so blunt._

"But, it didn't take long for me to realize how..." his voice softened, eyes dimming, "how lonely that was. Maybe I'd be content for a little while, but then the next morning my bed was cold again and it seemed too large, too big for just one person. And Junior always complained about wanting a mom, and I _certainly _was _not _introducing any of those shallow Koopettes to him. They only wanted me because I was rich and powerful and I wanted them because..._Well_..."

He cleared his throat, trailing off intentionally as I arched a dubious brow. My mouth twisted to the side, "Because they were _hot_?"

"Yeah, shallow as hell, I know," he smirked, "Ever since though, I decided the next woman has to be something much more serious. Someone with enough decorum to reign as queen, someone who can watch and guide my Koopalings and someone who sees me as more than a meal ticket to wealth and fame."

I peered at Bowser speculatively; at first glance it was hard to see past his striking appearance: the looming height, his dense musculature, the blazing red eyes and sharp spikes certainly didn't help. However what lay beyond his overwhelming appearance was a large, warm open heart that had seen much pain and endured many trials.

Bowser deserved to be happy and he deserved to have a wife worthy of the Darklandian throne and his Koopalings deserved a loving mother who would rear them as if they were her own flesh and blood.

"You deserve someone good," I really meant that, "A woman who will take care of your Koopalings and be your better half. You deserve to be happy with all that you've gone through."

His thoughtful expression warmed and his eyes darkened into a deeper, richer red, "And you too _Purga_. You deserve someone who will protect you, keep you smiling that amazing smile and you definitely need..."

His eyes were half-lidded when his voice dropped into a lower, thicker bass, "...Someone who will treat you like the princess that you are."

My pulse picked up, heart pounding loudly in my chest as I peered up at him. Bowser turned to face me, eyes warm and hot in the same setting. I didn't know if I was really hot, or if it was that strange, heat wave that always seemed to roll off of him like steam.

Bowser didn't say anything but when he took my hand within his, his scales were warm, borderline hot. As his thumb rubbed against the back of my hand, I studied our intermingled digits, noticing how my small fingers were brown and rich against his inner golden palm. His voice was smooth and deep and held a note of humor, "Perfect match, don't you think? We look _just_ alike."

I laughed softly; my fingers were nothing even remotely close to similar: his hands were nearly three times bigger and completely engulfed my hand. My fingers were wrapped in flesh, his were enclosed in thick golden scales. He gently held my hand, barely applying any pressure at all and in the next breath he pressed a gentle, tingly kiss on the back of my palm.

My face pinked, pulse dancing to the rhythm of my budding emotions. I was surprised when I saw the faintest touches of flush on his face too, "_Bowser_..."

"Flower...Daisy..." he was growling in a deep, rich voice. His tone was sincere, rough and velveteen all at the same time, "You deserve the best and I...I can be that for—"

A loud knock on the door made us fly apart and I almost tumbled off the bed. Bowser's reflexes were fast as he grabbed my ankle and immediately pulled me up right. Bowser's expression became murderous at the interruption, "_Chisana, _are you decent? Can I have a moment of your time?"

"Umm...?" My face was still dark red, and Bowser looked several steps beyond furious and he was clearly bristling. Even though I spoke to father, I was watching him, "G-Give me a moment Father?"

"Of course," Father's voice was soft on the other side of the door.

When I turned around, I saw Bowser glowering, glaring dead end at the wall; it was unspoken but we both knew that whatever moment we had was ruined. I shrugged, "Hey, what can you do?"

"I wanted to..." he shook his head, "Oh screw it. Never mind...I better get out of here before I have to explain to your dad why I'm here and that won't be pretty."

"Yeah, okay," I spoke softly.

"...Yeah," he growled.

Silence settled over us. I bit my lower lip as Bowser sighed deeply; what was he going to say? I wish I could hit rewind and hear what he was going to say! Bowser suddenly smirked, "Well before I go, how about we go for a little spin?"

"Spin?" I blinked.

Bowser picked me up and in a blur of rushing wind, hazy colors and streaming hair, I was spun three times and set back on my feet before I knew it. I laughed, nearly tripping over my own feet from being dizzy, " That was awesome!"

"Glad you enjoyed," he gave a _look _that made time seem as if it had crawled to a halt and my stomach did flips, "Have a goodnight _Purga._"

I swallowed thickly, "G-Goodnight and be careful Bowser, and _don't_ fall off that wall..."

"Don't worry, baby," he purred, "Us turtles are _always_ good with our hands."

I arched a dubious brow; _really?_ 'cause I've _never_ heard that before.

Bowser smirked and before he turned to head to the balcony, he performed an obvious double take. My smile dimmed when his jaw dropped comically, completely unrefined and eyes bulging.

I blinked in stupor, "..._What?_ Why are you staring at me that way?"

He was still _staring _with that dumb look on his face and suddenly he cut into motion. I nearly shrieked when he scrambled forward and clenched the front of my robe tightly.

Bowser's gigantic mitts were clinching the front of my silk robe together and I was partially confused, embarrassed and even irritated, "Bowser!? W-What the _hell_ are you _doing!?_ Just because we're f-friends and really close doesn't mean y-you can—"

"Star damn are you aware of _anything!?_" he snarled, face bright red as he spoke through his teeth, "Your...The e-entire front part of your robe was untying and falling _open_."

I gawped, peering down at my unusually revealed clavicle and where he was holding my robe shut. A hot, wild rush of color surged into my cheeks as I peered up at him dumbly; Oh _sheyt._

His eyes fluttered from my torso and quickly flitted back up to meet my stare. His temperature had sky-rocketed again, blazing hot and I could feel the heat from his hands through my robe; I can only imagine that my face was just as rose-red as his.

He was the epitome of embarrassment, eyes wide and a huge, bright smear of blush flushing his features a deep maroon. This whole thing might have been funny if the entire front of my robe wasn't about to spill open.

"..._Chisana_?" Father asked unsurely.

_Damn it! And on top of it all, there was Dad!_

I slowly secured my fingers over his, firmly clasping the edges of my robe shut. When I spoke, my voice was no louder than a whisper, "Oh...uh t-thanks...Bowser. For...Uh...?"

_For not exposing my chichis? Yes. Thank you!_

Bowser's hot, large claws slowly slipped away from my person and though his face was still red, it wasn't the brilliant ruby red it had been seconds ago, "N-No problem Flower..." He cleared his throat, avoiding eye contact.

"Thanks," I whispered, face still flushed.

"I'm glad I didn't see anything...uh...not that I didn't _want_ to...hell, I do! Stars I would have _loved_ to see—_w-wait_! I-I didn't mean it like _tha_t!" Bowser's face suddenly flushed bright red again, "I- I'm glad I helped you but I'm kind of kicking myself. Shoulda just let it fall open and have enjoyed the vie—I...oh _crap. _I'm just digging myself into a hole, aren't I?"

I turned away so he wouldn't see my amusement, "Quit while you're ahead, or not too far behind. Good night Bowser."

"Night Flower."

Bowser shot one last wink my way before heading to the balcony and scrambling down the side of the castle. The moment I couldn't hear his claws scraping against mortar, I let Father in. Father had been pacing in the hallway and quickly stepped into my room. He rounded on me so quickly I was nearly bowled over, "_Whoa_!"

"_Chisana, _earlier today I know I overacted, I didn't mean to snap at you. I was stressed and—"

"Whoa Dad!" I laughed, raising my hands in a placating gesture, "Calm down! Okay, so what were you saying?"

Father sighed, "I've been thinking things over and I wanted to let you know that I'm sorry for how I behaved earlier today. Can you forgive me? I was stressed and I just learned about what transpired between your grandmother and the Aqualandian King."

My good humor vanished, "Oh...So that's what it was...I almost cried when I heard it from Taurus. I was so mad...I'm glad I set him on fire."

Father blinked twice, "You did _what?"_

I flushed, realizing how bad that sounded, "I-I set him on fire...? Look, it really isn't as bad as it sounds..."

"I can't find it anywhere in my being to care about him," Father replied with a straight face, "I'm not sure whether I approve or not, but I...have a feeling you did Sarasaland proud."

I laughed, "By setting him on _fire!? _ Dad, since when were you so evil!?"

Father smirked but motioned for me to sit on the bed and he followed suit, "_Chisana, _do you mind if we talk for awhile? I know things haven't been easy on you, and I know I've been...hard on you, but it's only because I see potential in you, you know this, don't you?"

"Yeah," I whispered, "And sure, let's talk Dad."

Father's expression lightened and while he poured out his feelings, talking about Taurus, the council, about Grammy, Mom, I listened.

* * *

><p>"<em>Oh my Stars..."<em> Bowser groaned. He quietly climbed back into the guest suite hallway, careful to make as little noise as possible. He slowly made his way back to his room, head still spinning and heart racing.

He was this close, _this _frickin' close to _smoozing_ Princess Sarasaland and pouring his heart out to her. She _asked _if he wanted to remarry and he was so close to telling her something along the lines of, 'Hell yeah, I'd marry you in a hot minute and then I'd give you a ton of gorgeous, red-headed babies.'

And when he was about to climb over the balcony and leave, after twirling her around, her robe began to slowly slip open. Stars it was like a dream come true. The king had always wanted to sneak a peek and he certainly didn't think he'd get his wish.

First the long, honey stretch of her neck was revealed, then the tantalizing expanse of her clavicle followed. And as her silk blue robe inched painstakingly lower, unwinding with sinful ease, the second he began to see the round, beginning _luscious _swells of her cleavage...

_He nearly lost his shit. _

His brain came to a complete crash, and the crazy, Koopa mating instincts all but roared to life _violently_. His temperature shot to scalding hot, and his blood was roaring, telling him to piledrive her on that bed and lick and kiss her senseless. Show her why he was _really _called _'the king'_.

Bowser buried his face into his palms. _Oh Stars, what the hell was I thinking closing her robe!? It was the gentlekoopa thing to do but DAMN IT! Damn it all! I was soooo close to seeing her wonderful, perky friends. Oh Stars, they really are a gift to mankind. To Koopa kind. I'd worship that...worship alllll of that..._

_I'd let Mario kick me in the 'nads if I got to see them. Hell, I'd cartwheel around the Firelands' townsquare _naked_ if I could touch those soft, round beauties..._

Bowser suddenly froze the moment he heard someone muttering; he could hear Greenstache snoring in the other room, so it must have been that lame red turd.

The king slowed his footfall and stood outside of Mario's doorframe, eavesdropping on his foe; this would be a good distraction to take his mind off of Flower. Off of Flower and her _assets._

_Her very nice assets. _

_Her very nice, perky assets that I'd like to..._

_Calm down King. Calm down and think unsexy thoughts. Kamek. Kamek in a speedo. Wrinkly, old Kamek in a banana hammock that left _nothing _to the imagination._

Bowser covered his mouth to prevent himself from puking; and his control was back just like _that._

* * *

><p>The Super Mario paced the confines of his guest suite nervously, brows drawn together in a tight knot above his nose. His well-loved, well-worn brown work boots seemed terribly out of place amongst the expensive silken draperies and luxurious accommodations that cost thousands of coins. The suite was far too nice and he couldn't even <em>dream<em> of affording half of the furniture in this room on his humble plumber salary.

He released a deep, weary sigh and looked into his towering crystal vanity. Three reflections of himself stared back; each one peering out at him from a different angle.

While he stared at his reflection, he suddenly took a step forward and spoke in a rehearsed voice, "Heya Princess! Fine day-a eh? No...Hi Miss Peach! You look-a lovely today! No...still not-a good enough..."

Mario rubbed his chin pensively and switched tactics. His voice fell into a smooth, lower, suave purr, "_Ciao Bella_. How are-a you?"

The overly smooth, Casanova talk was so completely _un-Mario_ that he laughed long and hard at himself; he sounded absolutely ridiculous trying to be something that he was not, "Was that too much _Italiano_ smooth?"

He then tried a voice much closer to his usual timber, "Hello-a Peach. How are you, _Molto bella_? That's a little better...but still it's-a not right..."

Mario scratched at his head, tired and wary of rehearsing lame, cliché lines to impress his childhood sweetheart. As Mario rubbed his trademark white gloves over his eyes, a low, rumbling chuckle made him jump.

The infamous plumber pivoted quickly, senses on alert and caught sight of his biggest nemesis. King Bowser leaned against his door arch casually, arms crossed and a knowing, smug smirk on his face.

"Well, well, well," Bowser studied his claws, "It seems Plumber McLoserface is having _girl troubles_."

Mario frowned, turning away from him, "Didn't we agree to keep-a three hundred paces from each other-a? How did you-a get in here anyways!?"

"Hard to do when your door is _next_ to mine, Plumb scum," Bowser chuckled lowly in the back of his throat, "And secondly, you left the door unlocked. Anyone could have heard your pathetic blubbering."

The gargantuan Koopa pushed off the doorframe and approached slowly, with a ruthless grin painted across his features. The demon king's hellish grin and sudden advance set Mario's mental alarms into overdrive.

Mario's entire frame tensed, automatically shifting into a defensive stance and the hero's sudden movement didn't go unnoticed. Bowser's eyes sharpened as he chuckled darkly, "At ease there Toilet clog. I'm not gonna start anything with you. We're _pals _now right?"

"No," Mario didn't quite growl, "We've just-a called a truce."

In his past dealings with Bowser, in the rare moments when they called a temporary ceasefire and banded together to topple an even bigger foe, Mario was always surprised at how, for a lack of a better word, _loyal _Bowser was.

When Bowser gave his word about something, he saw it through to the dirty, ugly end. Even if it meant shoving aside his lifelong hatred for his biggest foe.

Mario didn't know how Bowser managed to do so; many years ago when they first worked together to defeat Smithy, Mario had been on full alert. The Italian hero was sure that Bowser would renege on his word and attack at an inopportune moment.

After all, their bitter blood feud extended beyond the bounds of rivalry and sank into the dark depths of hatred. There were several times when Mario thought during their journey to collect the seven stars, that Bowser would off him in his sleep, or wait for the moment his back was turned to strike.

But it never happened.

If anything, Bowser had showed his daunting mettle as a warrior and a companion. He was a ferociously fierce warrior, able to shred foes with the strength of his bare hands and teeth. There had been several instances when Bowser saved his ass and had defended him with such awe-inspiring brutality.

Bowser's sheer determination and ability to keep his word was a trait Mario secretly admired about him. When Bowser said he'd do something, _he would_; it sounded shady as hell, but a promise from Bowser was one of the few forces in the universe that Mario trusted in completely.

And here they were squared off again, but the rules of this game were slightly altered. Bowser and Mario were still foes, but the battlefield was now the palace and the players involved had sovereignty and princesses.

This fight was different from all the other contests in their extensive past; they weren't to battle in blows and punches and showcase their might. In fact fighting would be a direct disqualification and they would be forced to leave.

However, just because they couldn't throw punches didn't mean they couldn't compete. The King Koopa may have given his word not to fight, but that didn't stop Bowser from trying to play mind games.

Even now Bowser was employing an intimidation tactic, pacing slow, calculated circles around Mario; too similar to a predator circling its prey. Bowser finally stopped directly in front of him, "Never thought I'd see the day that the _Super Mario_ would be afraid."

Bowser chuckled roughly in the back of his throat and though he was smiling, his eyes were thinner than blades, "What's wrong _Maria_? Scared of a _girl_ in a _pretty pink dress_? It's funny how you can face off against the grand frickin' demon king, charge headstrong through fire and hell and yet one _skirt _renders you into a sad mass of goo. How _pathetic_."

A prick of indignation rose in the pit of Mario's stomach but he quickly clamped down; losing his cool never helped him. Instead he pretended to be nonchalant, "Yeah and what-a of it? What's wrong-a with that? I care for and-a respect her. Not like you'd know-a what that's like."

Bowser's sly grin didn't falter, though his blood-red eyes sharpened, "At least _I'm_ not here blubbering pathetic lines to myself over a _girl_. What's next? Gonna write her _poetry_ or some shit like that?"

The Koopa King burst into dark, patronizing laughter, "Can you imagine? _Writing a girl poetry_? How much of a puss move is _that!?"_

Mario frowned, halfway turning away from Bowser's sordid grin, "Maybe...but I know-a Peach is special. I've always...loved her. From the first time-a we played together as babies...And now..."

Bowser stared at him with a hard, discerning glare; was Mario frickin' _stupid_? Or was he really _this_ trusting? Here he was spewing his inner most feelings, his guts to his biggest foe. And Bowser certainly was not above manipulating and using all of this against him.

"What is _this_?" Bowser smirked dryly, "You tryin' to play me or somethin'? You think just because I promised Flow—that hot Desert broad that I won't pound your pathetic plumber ass that I won't _still_ do everything in my power to screw you over?"

Mario peered at the smirking Koopa king carefully, with a thoughtful frown creasing his brow. It was beginning to unnerve and maybe even intimidate—Bowser that his biggest foe was trying to discern him.

"You know," Mario spoke softly, "I don't think you-a would."

Bowser's grin festered into something dark and unholy, "_Try me_."

Mario's stern expression didn't hold the edge it once had, "Peach and Luigi said that you've-a changed. That you're not evil-a anymore. But all I know-a is that my admiration for Peach has always been greater than my distrust of you-a."

_That _wiped the smug grin clear off Bowser's smug face. In fact for a rare moment Bowser's candid stupor was open and clear on his face but it quickly reformed into irritation, "That's a load of Goomba shit in a chef salad. You don't "distrust" me. You hate _every single_ fiber of my being."

Mario shook his head, "I don't."

"You _do_," The upper hand Bowser thought he had coming in was beginning to fade like fog, "I've wrecked your stupid little parties, broke your bones, cursed you, kidnapped your pretty little _girlfriend _for decades and you're telling me you don't hate me!?"

"No," Mario's tone and face were perfectly straight, "I don't-a."

Most people—the relatively decent ones at least—had ticks that gave them away when they lied: a slight glance to the left, a slight twitch in their cheek, something. Though the good liars, those who were used to deceiving others, mastered the art of lying with a perfectly straight face.

But even then it wasn't infallible because when Humans, Koopas, Goombas, anything with breath and reason lied, their pulse and heart beat sped up. It was a clever secret that was well-known amongst the Koopas, and something they kept relatively unknown from the other races. It also kept them _very_ honest; there was no point in lying because _everyone _knew when you were.

Bowser zeroed in on Mario's pathetic human heartbeat. The king closed his eyes, trying to block out all other surrounding noise. Since Koopa hearing was so sensitive it was actually difficult to focus on one sound.

He could hear the loud footfall of the servants outside the room, softer and in the distance, someone a floor below squeezed, and even more distant than that, outside a gust of wind was stirring sand.

The king shoved all distractions aside until in the midst of all the noisy cacophony and ruckus, he picked up the steady, beating heart of the man standing a few paces in front of him. There was no rocketing pulse or even a change.

Bowser was floored; _he was telling the truth._

A feeling, a sensation Bowser couldn't describe left him feeling pissed, baffled and a little relieved. He was so confused, and very irritated. How could Mario not hate him?

"How?" Bowser stared blankly and his voice was dead of any emotion, "How can you not hate me!? I've destroyed your life, and I've openly _lusted_ after the woman you love, beat the holy shit out of your brother and I've lost count of all the times I've destroyed Toad Town. By the way, I've intentionally clogged toilets with the nastiest things I could find and then laughed my ass off at you. You _have_ to hate me."

Mario's neutral expression was beginning to really piss the king off; everyone had always held Mario as this perfect, forgiving hero and Bowser had always thought it had been a load of steaming piranha crap. But the hero's true lack of hatred was smacking him in the face. After all the things Bowser had done to him, Mario didn't hate him.

Was Mario _really this_ nice?

Did people this good really exist? Bowser had always thought that heroes were the worst two-faced liars; at least with a bad guy you _knew_ what you were getting, but with people who pretended to be good, they were the most dangerous.

And no one was completely good, in fact most people who pretended to be good were the worst of the evil; all councils and governments were crooked, courts who proudly toted their impartiality weren't and officers and authority often abused their power.

Bowser may have been entrenched in the thickest, blackest depths of evil but _at least_ he was completely honest about his iniquity. He was the epitome of a villain; he admitted to being selfish, greedy and in all honesty, he'd made it well known that he'd destroy all other kingdoms if it ensured the survival of his own. He was dark, evil enough even to want to kill all of the suitors just to claim the girl he wanted.

King Bowser had never pretended to be good and anyone who thought of him as redeemable was a fool. But while most people were busy judging and scorning him, as he was a rather big, easy target, they didn't see beneath the underneath.

The _real_ monsters hid themselves behind all their prestige and wealth and shiny badges. The wickedest of the wicked usually wore the finest clothing, owned the largest homes and held the most affluence.

People like Taurus who were well-dressed, well-spoken and attractive were able to fly under the radar. They were able to pretend to be good, able to hide the blood on their hands until they finally revealed their real malicious agenda.

And maybe in the sea of evil, Mario really was a beckon of truth and goodness.

_All the things Bowser wasn't. _

Bowser's rising ire was slowly beginning to crumble his carefully crafted confident veneer, "You hate me, _Mario_. No one, and I mean _no one_ is that forgiving. Or that heroic. And that good. Or whatever the hell you are. You rescue Peach because at the end of the day you want to _tap that_. You _expect _to. Everyone has ulterior motives, even heroes. Even _you_."

The king laughed mirthlessly, "Everyone hates me because I'm open about it. Yeah, I've looted, destroyed and kidnapped. But hey, at least I'm _honest_. So don't try and pretend you're this goody-goody nerd because deep down, you're not as good as you pretend to be."

Throughout the whole speech, Mario's open, ungrudging expression never changed. It only served to wind up Bowser even more. Instead of being angry, a perplexing wave of serenity soothed the hero's features as he listened, _really_ listened to his lifelong nemesis.

"I don't hate-a you," Mario spoke softly, "And I think you-a see that."

"_Why!?"_ Bowser bellowed furiously, dark clots of smoke rising from his jowls, "Why don't you hate me then!? _Everyone does_!"

"Peach doesn't," Mario spoke softly, blue eyes still diligent and watching him carefully, "Luigi doesn't. King Apricotto doesn't-a."

Bowser laughed coldly, raking a claw through his mane with building agitation, "Oh I get it. This benevolent act is so you can win the pink broad. I _get it_. A pure, pretty princess isn't going to give you the time of day unless you're the annoying, selfless hero type, huh?"

Confused, Mario titled his head as Bowser smiled with dark jollity, "So that's the trick huh? That's the trick to landing an innocent, pretty princess? She's not gonna want anyone else who has a little grit and grime to them. Someone who isn't wholesome and one hundred percent knight in shining armor material."

Mario remained puzzled, brows furrowed; _what is he going on about? Nothing he's saying is making a lick of sense. _Bowser was usually direct, painfully blunt even. If he liked you, you knew. If he didn't like you, you knew. You certainly never had to wonder what he ever thought because it seemed as if his mouth and brain were hardwired together.

While Mario stewed on his foe's unusual rambling, a prattle that seemed to be going in aimless circles, something suddenly _clicked_. Mario's eyes were wide with surprise, "...You're talking-a about yourself..."

Bowser suddenly froze, eyes wide with consternation and horror as he realized far too late that he had said to much. With a self-deprecating snarl, Bowser's shoulders squared up as his eyes flared a malevolent orange, "_Oh yeah_!?" Well...Well who the hell is jealous of _you_? _Huh!?_ You've got the Star damn world on your side! Everyone is happy, cheering you on to score the girl of your dreams. You don't have to worry about millions and billions of haters, people trying to keep you two worlds apart...And you know without a shadow of a doubt that one day you'll get to marry her."

The king's voice fell to a murmur, "And you know that someday...you'll...you'll get to make love to her and have a child with her...That you'll get the chance to live a life with the only woman you've ever truly loved..."

By the last word, the king's eyes were so dim and his voice so soft that it fell into a whisper. Mario peered at his ostentatious foe, eyes bright with sympathy and something else Bowser couldn't quite place.

"Bowser..." Mario breathed.

Bowser closed his eyes and suddenly curling, reddish brown locks materialized in his mind. The glittering, large doll-like eyes and the honey brown complexion blazed brightly in his mind's eye.

"Who is she?" Mario's voice was as soft as lanolin, "Is it...Daisy?"

The honeyed thoughts of flowers and tasty Koopa berries shattered jarringly and the King jerked so abruptly he startled Mario. Mario stumbled back a few feet. Bowser glared at him fiercely, eyes orange and burning and furious.

"Peach told me. She said she-a sees the way-a you look at her..." Mario's voice was careful, soft, "and she's right, you do treat her differently-a. It's her, huh? It's-a her you like."

Beneath the king's quivering rage was a painful load of vulnerability. A sudden rush of empathy for Bowser made Mario take a cautious step forward. With placating hands stretched outwards, Mario spoke, "Bowser...It's okay...I promise I'll try-a to help you...I'll try to help...We don't have to fight-a anymore...there's more important things to life..."

Bowser's expression contorted from surprise into a scary black rage. The hatred and anger on Bowser's face was terrifying and one so intense that even the Super Mario was stunned.

Mario froze just long enough for Bowser to make his escape. He snarled loudly before turning and barreling to his own quarters. He shoved aside a few of the maids who had gathered, pushing anything and anyone out of his way.

He was so furious, so disgusted as a fierce wave of bile threatened to rise from his stomach. He barely made it into his own guest suite as the last of his restraint collapsed like the remains of a drybones. Bowser slammed the door shut as searing fury made his temperature flush hellishly and he was so damn mad that his vision blurred at the edges.

Teeth gnashed together, he forcefully swallowed the pathetic feeling of shame and weakness; he nearly wept his tattered heart to his biggest lifelong foe and revealed that he was jealous. Fucking jealous of his public relationship with Peach.

Mario and Peach's relationship was something he wanted for Daisy and himself. He wanted the same support, the same openness, something he knew they'd never have. In what world can a Koopa and a Human love?

And to add insult to injury, Mario felt sympathetic for him. _Mario_ felt sorry for _him._ It was all so disgusting and pathetic. The idea of Mario's sympathy, the shinning blue eyes and the outstretched, comforting hands to heal and soothe.

Bowser growled furiously, teeth bared as he trembled, cradling his pounding head. He was so enraged he was beginning to become light-headed and he thought he could possibly back out.

The tempo of his own pulse throbbed like the tune of war drums and whenever Bowser's threshold of fury crossed into dark territories, he could swear he heard his father's sinister, mocking laughter.

And right now the dead King Morton was laughing, jeering with jubilant iniquity. It was if, when the darkest, wildest furies of his were unshackled, Morton Senior was free to taunt him. Bowser tried to ignore the delighted sneer of his father's voice; maybe it was the Star tonic medicine making him loopy, or maybe he was just dead tired.

Bowser hadn't had any real sleep in Sarasaland or maybe he really was just an angry, psychotic bundle of irreparable issues that reared up at the worst moments.

The swimming, thick-headedness that was clogging up his thoughts, made him feel light-headed and disconnected. The king was sweating, shaking and completely unhinged but with his few moments of rational clarity, he found the sturdiest wall to rest his back against and closed his eyes. He tried to rest his eyes and ignore the mocking, booming laughter of his father's bloodthirsty voice.

* * *

><p><em>The semisweet, dark void of numb oblivion faded as the blonde child slowly came to with a painful clarity. His eyes swam and unrolled from the back of his skull as his entire body ached, discolored with bruises and crusted with dried blood. <em>

_The stale, humid air was rank with sweat and tension. The blond boy lay lifelessly on his side with his face against the dirt, swollen cheek throbbing as he turned his head to avoid inhaling dirt. _

_"Home..." the boy muttered, trembling and tearing up, "I just want to go home..."_

_The child was filthy, exhausted and bleeding from his cracked lips and a broken nose. He froze, body trembling as the encroachment of leather boots padded closer. _

_Silver eyes were bloodshot and wide, trembling as two sets of feet stood near him. _They_ only came when they would hurt him. He never saw his captor's faces, but he could discern the difference between their voices. They didn't call each other by name, but for identification, the boy numbered them. One, Two and Three. He didn't like them enough to give them names when they hurt him._

_"_He's just a kid. How long will we be doing this for?"_ One wasn't a particularly good man, but he certainly wasn't callous like the others. After torturing and starving the young Prince for a day, One's initial jubilance had morphed into something close to sympathy. _

_"_Let the little rich snot suffer_," that was Three, "_He has more coins then our whole village combined. He'd grow up and think he was better than us all. We've finally got a richie and we can make them pay."

_Three was easily the worst of the kidnappers by a long shot. While One and Two constantly reminded him that this was business, Three was a sadist who enjoyed what he did. _

_Three thoughtlessly crushed, hit, punched a boy who wasn't more than nine years old and usually laughed as he did so. One felt bad when the child cried, Two was nonchalant and Three enjoyed it._

_The young Prince groaned when a handful of his hair was roughly grabbed and his head was snatched back painfully. He was brought to look at Three's masked face, "_Guess what little princess. If Daddy doesn't agree with our demands, we get to have more fun."

_Two stepped into the tent, "_No dice. The king refuses to negotiate with terrorists."

_The prince's eyes grew wide, wild and bright with fear as his heart raced crazily. He had to get away, he had to leave before they started to hurt him again. Every time his dad said no, he was hurt. _

_The prince began to sob, saltine tears stinging the cuts on his face; he wanted his mom. Whenever he was afraid and cried, she always held and kissed him until he felt better. He wanted to be home, where it was always cool and crisp and where all the servants played with him. He wanted to be anywhere but here._

_He'd do his homework and wouldn't complain anymore if it meant being away from here, away from those mean men, he'd eat disgusting vegetables if it meant he'd be able to see his mom's pretty face._

_But he knew it was too late when he heard Three's awful, joyful laughter, "_You know what that means, princess. Guess that means you're mine. We'll use the hot poker this time."

_Two remained pensively silent as One protested, _"Come on, he doesn't deserve that. Look at him, he looks like hell."

"The child has to survive," _Two quipped nonchalantly_, "Keep that in mind_." _

"But he does deserve all this," _Three growled happily, "_His Daddy has to hear him scream and maybe that'll change his mind and the Fish king will finally negotiate with us peasants. This just shows his kid means shit to him. Now heat the poker."

* * *

><p>"Awake Sire?"<p>

Taurus tiredly blinked to clear consciousness; it was the middle of the night and he had been just beginning to doze off. It was late, cold and his mother had been terribly worried about him. She had been sending maids to check on him and coax him into retiring for the evening.

Prince Aqualand sat stiffly in his throne and rubbed his sore eyes; it's not like being in bed would have helped anyways, most nights he couldn't sleep.

Fears, nightmares fed on his mind and attacked when he was the most vulnerable. Nightmares he'd been having since he was a child haunted him for decades.

Taurus glared jadedly at the maid, "I am. I've been waiting for the contact to arrive. He was supposed to have been here several hours ago. It's Two a.m. He should have been here by twelve."

"Queen Gemini is simply worried, Sire."

"I know. Once business is taken care of, I'll retire for the evening," Taurus nodded, "Thank you."

The maid bowed before turning and sweeping away. Taurus couldn't honestly blame his mother for being worried, he looked a wreck; golden hair tousled and dark bruised bags under his eyes. He had always been pale, but the lack of sleep made him appear sallow and sickly.

But even then, he was Prince Aqualand and he was dressed to kill in his finest designer suit. With a glass of his most expensive liquor in hand, he sipped, calmly waiting; he might not feel well, but no one would say he didn't look like a million coins.

Two sentinels in shark armor approached the throne and bowed, "Sire, your guest as arrived."

"Good, send him on in."

The two sentinels bowed before retrieving the guest. Taurus drained the last of his strong beverage before relenting his undivided attention.

The two Aqualand sentinels walked on either side of the foreign councilman. His white robes sorely stuck out amongst the dark colors of Palace Aqualandia.

Taurus smirked; all the waiting, the reoccurring night terrors and mother-worrying had been worth this moment and with his smoothest drawl, "It's so good to see you. Welcome, Councilman Ztarlight."

* * *

><p>Alice: Hope you all enjoyed! ^_^ See you next chapter, and hey, why not leave a review? I'll stalk-er, I mean <em>visit<em> your bios. :)

Ultrra: (stares)...Well, in no way was _that_ creepy!

Alice: Lol! See you next chapter! Also when you leave a review, give three characters from TTATB. They should probably be your favorites but I won't say why but you'll see! ;)


	30. Skin: So long, King Bowser

(XXX months ago)

Ultrra: (rushes over to Alice's house) ALICE! SMASH BRO FOUR IS OUT! We need to stop doing what we're doing right now and PLAY! Stop being productive right now! O_O

Alice: O_O What!? This better not be a lie!

Ultrra: Really? When have I lied to you!?

Alice: (unimpressed) When you told me in Hyrule Heroes there was a cut scene of Link shirtless...?

Ultrra:...Okay, you got me there XD. But it DID get you to play though XDDD

Alice: Whatever liar mcliarson. Let's get started!

Ultrra: (kool aid dude voice) _Oh yeeeeeah._

Alice: Do you think Daisy is FINALLY a playable character!?

Ultrra: (worried look)Uh...

Alice: Rosalina is a new character. So she has to be here!

Ultra: Uhhhhh...

Alice: I mean, after excluding her in the awesome Mario 3D land game, this is retribution, Right!?

Ultrra: OMG Alice, just keep setting yourself up for the heartbreak XD

Alice: She's the girl character who can get down with the boys. Nintendo got it right this time. I can feel it X)

Ultrra: SMH Alice XD

(Alice manages to unlock every last character in SSB4)

Alice: (angry flaming rage eyes and raises a fist to the heavens) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! **_FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-_**

(Present day)

Alice:..

Ultrra: (smirks)'Over it' my ass XP

Alice: XD I swear, I am. You know what? Let's just do this session. XD Anyways, holy review count, Batman! Have we actually broke the 500 review barrier!?

Ultrra: (checks) ...Yep.

Alice: (bows) Thank you readers, reviews, and lurkers alike. And Pmers. You know...the people who write...pms XD And now time for a quick story time.

(The lights dim and a center spotlight falls on Alice)

Ultrra:...(Looks around confused)…WTF?

Alice: (Is holding a mic) Hello? Can everyone in the house hear me? Thank you, you're all beautiful by the way.

Ultrra: This is an author's note, not a cruise hosting party. XD

Alice: Once again. Thank you for all the support. TTATB had very humble beginnings and we (and by _we_ Ultrra, I mean ME, Alice XD) used to write and think 'My goodness, Who's going to read a story about this odd couple!? I'm ruined. I'm screwed. I'm scruined XDDD Anyways, to honor the broken 500 review mark, here's a short story included before the real story. It's lightheaded, and not serious at all, but please do enjoy! J I'll put the usual TATB header in front of the actual story so it's not confusing.

Ultrra: Well, it certainly did have humble beginnings. Before we begin, anything you want to get off your chest?

Alice: Hmm yes. There is something I've got to address. One of the reviews rubbed me the wrong way. I'll preface by saying how I'll happily accept criticism as long as it's delivered in a constructive way. Openly calling out my beta for typos, etc isn't constructive _at all_. Other reviewers/readers have been polite enough to message me and/or helpfully point out missed things. There's good ways to off help, especially since I appreciate and respect my busy student/beta. And in that instance, it wasn't a good look.

Ultrra: Lol that's true.

Alice: In fact, if anything, I've actually taken _way_ longer to publish this chapter because I have been going over this chapter over and over and over again to check for typos. It should have been out weeks ago but hey, I had to look over typos. -_- So really, let's make sure we use constructive criticism? I appreciate and love everything Bi0's done for me. Again, I sense no real malicious intent behind the review but, let's not cross that bridge again? Good? J

Ultrra: Then do your thing and handle those typos, girl. X)

Alice: On that note, I grew tired and stopped checking for typos. I hope it's not obvious when I did...

Ultrra: Lolktz

Alex: I'mp keeding guyz. I editd thus to purfuction

Ultrrina: Lolp!

Aloicke: Enjoi the storyyy!

Ultron: LALM! XD

* * *

><p>"Enter."<p>

A Goomba and a ParaKoopa wearing white lab coats and goofy, high-tech goggles appeared. They bowed before speaking, "Good afternoon my king! Ah! We see you are diligently at work!"

Bowser held a gameKoopa KS in hand and arched an eyebrow; were these bastards being _facetious_ with him!? Him? King mother_friggin'_ Koopa?!

His face was on banners, coins, currency, and so again he wondered: were these nerds being facetious with him 'cause let it be known he had no qualms opening a kerokero cola of whoop-ass on these nerds.

"Explain yourselves," he growled, jamming the buttons repeatedly as he navigated Super Bowser through all the perilous traps of the evil Dario's lair, "I'm trying—! Come _on_! _Ungh! Ugh!_ ARGH damn it! Done in again! World eight is friggin' ridiculous. I hate that evil custodian."

"Playing Super Bowser World, my liege?" The ParaKoopa asked.

"Tryin' to save princess Luuma?" The Goomba with the huge spectacles smiled, "She's super cute huh?"

The nerdy ParaKoopa was having a nerdgasm at the thought of the fictional princess, "B-Boy. I'd sure _love _to do some_ calculus_ with her _all night long_."

"Kooperton!" The Goomba nerd frowned disapprovingly, "Pump the breaks man! Some guys really do only have one thing on their mind!"

"What? The ParaKoopa shrugged, "I know she's a special kind of girl and we'd start slow. First we'd start the night off easy and slow with differential calc and then, and only when she's ready would we _heat the night up_ with integral calc!"

The Goomba nerd wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, "_Hehe_, there's_ nothing_ that gets a girl hotter than integral calc!"

Bowser rolled his eyes at the horrid nerd babbling and gave world eight another shot. Note: in this game King Bowser was the hero and fought against the evil, villainous Dario—it wasn't Mario so he couldn't sue for copyright or defamation of character—who was evil and mad because his life sucked: he was tired of being a lame janitor and had a short man's complex.

King Bowser fought against Dario and his evil army of bratty delinquent Toads. And the damsel in distress? The beautiful, sassy Princess Luuma.

Princess Luuma had unconventionally short rose-red hair, she wore aqua blue dresses with lily insignias and had an oddly uncanny resemblance to a _certain_ princess... Not to mention Luuma was a Darklandian word that translated closely to 'Petal' or 'Flower'

_Hmm._

Oh. And she was_ completely_ in love with King Bowser.

_Boom_. Recipe for a top selling game.

Just. Like that. But really, who the hell didn't like stomping those bratty-ass Toads? They cheated in school, farted in fans, and graffitied lewd images on walls.

And every time you beat a boss Toad, as a minigame you got to spank 'em! Super Bowser put them over his knee and if you pressed the right sequence of buttons, those bratty Toads got a sore ass!

Not to mention when you beat the game, there was an unlockable cut scene of Princess Luuma and Super Bowser making-out amorously and sloppily. None of that _sissy_, platonic _kiss-on-the-cheek_ Goomba crap here. The hero got the girl. _The. END._

"Have you beat world eight yet?" The ParaKoopa asked.

And almost on cue Super Bowser lost his last life, falling painfully into lava. The game over screen popped up with Dario laughing and crudely mooning the gamers.

Bowser growled irritably, cutting the power off once more, "I _was _going to until you idiots got me _ganked_!" The king snarled, discarding his custom-made handheld, "What is it!?"

"Sire, we completed the device you acquire," the Goomba nerd looked smug.

"Already?" Bowser grinned wickedly, "Maybe keeping you techheads nerd sandwiches around does pay off."

"It's currently located in our laboratory. Follow us if you will, Your Wretchedness."

Bowser trailed after his scientists who were bubbly and giddy, cooing over a device that would wow him. They took the elevators to the basement and strolled into the Bowser's Keep's very own state of the art laboratory.

Despite being the epitome of masculinity and badassness, Lord Bowser understood that science and technology went hand in hand with advancing a successful monarchy.

His personal laboratory had the latest equipment, and brand new—Star damn expensive—machinery, microscopes, centrifuges, Star laser technology, fume hoods, anything else that was a scientist's wetdream.

They walked passed busy Goombas and ParaKoopas who wore white lab coats and sleek, opaque goggles. The scientists were hard at work, performing experiments on live piranha plants and chain chomp test subjects.

It wasn't long before the two scientists stopped near an empty cubicle. Bowser tromped around them, peering down at a tiny, gizmo that blinked and flashed with dancing lights. To him, the device looked like a smiling face; two red flashing eyes and a yellow smile that lit up every few seconds.

"The mol-E-culer is finished!" the ParaKoopa chirruped happily, "And this is how it works. Apply it to your body on a stable, solid surface, preferably one's torso and delicately—"

"Screw delicate."

Bowser grabbed the mol-E-culer and without a second thought, slapped it onto his person. A blinding explosion of rainbow light broke forth in a prism of colors and hues. The two scientists quailed loudly, covering their sensitive eyes as Bowser cackled with insane laughter.

"_Whoahahayeaaah!"_

* * *

><p>"This had better be <em>good<em>," I muttered to myself, "Bowwy raised a huge stink over this."

I walked into the throne room and approached at Bowser's request. He sat on the throne, idly tossing something in hand as he waited. Bowser sighed dismally, "Man, I _could_ be making out with Princess Luuma right now..."

_Hmm. By making weird statements like that, I assume he mustn't know I was here yet_. I cleared my throat loudly. Bowser stopped juggling the ornament in his hand and perked up, "Hey! Flower!"

"Hey yourself," I approached until I was standing a few meters away, "So what is this 'super kickass' invention you wanted to showoff?"

It must have been good with the way Bowser leapt from the throne and clambered over in a rush. Aww cute! He seemed really excited; tail thumping and eyes glowing deep crimson.

"I don't wanna tell you what it does quite yet," he preened, "just sit back and be awed."

"Okay," I grinned, "I'm sitting back and waiting to be awed."

"The scientists said just to snap it on like so, press the dial like this and..."

His image suddenly blurred and scattered, breaking apart into thousands of spheres. Spinning green and golden molecules rearranged and morphed into a tan blob.

His form shrank a few feet and compacted as the wreathing molecules slowed until they dissolved altogether. A completely new person stood in Bowser's stead. I blinked, gaping up at the new person in awe.

"_Oh Stars_..." I breathed softly.

He was tall, nearing six and a half feet, skin rich with a tan and as this was Bowser, he was titanic and muscular.

But there was no mistaking the feral smile, the wild hair in unruly crimson tufts and his signature blood-red eyes; it was clearly Bowser as a human. It worked for him, he was quite handsome in a dangerous sort of way.

Even as a human, he still had a glorious mane, thick flame colored hair that shone in several different vibrant hues of copper, gold and mahogany.

It fell passed his shoulders, longer than my own even as it fell in unruly, jagged locks that were so bright and reminded me of fire.

His hair was wild and thick and everywhere and I was tempted to grasp a lock of fire within my digits to learn if his hair was as soft as it appeared to be.

I continued to drink in his new appearance, comparing and contrasting the differences between his two forms. There were millions of differences and yet the similarities I saw were eerily uncanny.

Subdued amusement shone in his eyes, absorbing my reaction to his new form. Heh, you know the type of boy fathers wouldn't want near their daughters? That was him. He looked like that guy; wild, handsome, rugged and something innately dangerous lurked about him.

He was cute. Handsome was more along the right vein. Attractive though balanced with enough hard, serrated masculine features to avoid being 'pretty'. And yet he definitely held the correct arrangement of features that clearly resonated with splendor. I realized the handsome stranger was still studying me, an amused smirk curled on lips that seemed soft.

I blushed, moving the fringe from my eyes.

"Hey there," he even seemed to maintain the deadly sharp smile he had as the Koopa king, "So what do you think? Not a bad-looking fleshbag eh?"

I snapped out of my trance; the familiar yet different crimson eyes were oddly hypnotic, "Wow," I blinked, "there's no denying you're you. You look...Well you look just as wild and strong but as a human."

He laughed, his voice was essentially the same deep timbre but it sounded smoother? Less beast-like.

"Is this a creation of Professor E. Gadd?" I asked.

Finally Bowser's conceited visage crinkled with irritation, "What? No. _Screw _that guy. I had this manufactured in my castle laboratory," with a smirk he patted at the contraption fondly.

I blinked, "Your castle has a lab?! A laboratory?!"

"Yep. And a personal spa and a restaurant."

"Holy shi—"

Smirking, he held up the device, which could be worn as a button. It was a golden sphere, with blinking lights arranged in what looked like a face,"This thing is called a mol-E-culer splitter; you can essentially rearrange your form painlessly. Use it for more than forty-eight hours straight though and it'll hurt like shit."

He laughed, swaying a bit on his feet, "Whoa! This feels weird! This fleshbag form is puny, I feel vulnerable as hell without my shell! And my balance is crap without my tail...maybe that's why you're so clumsy Flower, 'cause you're missing your tail."

I blinked, realizing something. As he swayed and rocked, trying to find his balance, I studied his form: he was sculptured and powerful, reminiscent of a Greek statue. He was muscular, strong torso and really defined abs. Wait...where was his shirt? Or his...?

_Oh. My. Stars._

I ripped my eyes away from his anatomy before I could look any lower. I gasped, a blush burning so hot against my skin I thought I'd pass out.

I quickly spun away, shielding my eyes, "B-Bowser...y-y-you're..."

"Completely gorgeous?" He was laughing, "You've been staring and blushing like a schoolgirl this whole time!"

Then he appeared in front of me, I screamed, turning my back to him, "N-N-No! That's...n-not the problem!"

"Ah so you are smitten," he purred, "you're blushing so hard you oughta start glowing. I get it. I'm delicious, Koopa or human."

"T-T-Thats because..."

"Just admit it: I am a sexy Koopa and therefore I make a sexy human."

Fed up with his vanity, I snapped around to glare at him. Even though my cheeks glowed red-hot, I kept my glare strictly on his face, "Bowser! Save for your collar and bracers, y-you are _completely naked_!"

He grinned, sharp incisors bared. He wasn't even remotely embarrassed and if anything seemed completely comfortable within his own skin. His flawless...dewy...skin...skin I would like to touch...

Would he let me touch his hair? I froze, realizing I was ogling him far too long and abruptly slapped my hands over my eyes. I didn't miss him quirking a mischievous eyebrow, "Like what you see_ Purga_?"

"I..._T-That's not important!_"

"So you _do_ like what you see!" He roared with bursting mirth.

I turned my back to him, trying to ignore the scalding heat in my face. He guffawed loudly as I growled, "W-Will you just p-put something on you shameless Ko—man!?"

"Having sinful thoughts?" He purred.

"Bowser!"

"If you wanna take a picture and hang it on your wall, go ahead. Or we could turn it into a full-blow nude photo shoot. You can choose my poses and I can lay on the ground like a Greek sexgod—"

"_K-Kammy_!" I shrieked, voice shrill, "_Kamek_!"

The two MagiKoopa appeared in a splatter of geometric shapes, "Lady Daisy what is the matt—?"

Momentarily surprised, they peered at the unknown human.

"Who is that?" Kamek questioned, "He looks really familiar..."

"Come on now Geezer, you should be able to recognize my brilliance in any form."

"Lord Bowser?!" Kamek sounded surprised and interested, "Oh! Test running the Mol-E-culer already eh?"

"My Stars Lord Bowser!" Kammy shrieked, "Cover up in the presence of a lady_! Shame on you_! The princess is as red as a tomato!"

"More like as purple as a plum," Kamek grinned as Bowser laughed.

"K-Kamek!?" I cried out, "Don't encourage him!"

Bowser's roaring laughter boomed, "I don't think she minded the view too much. But Stars I lost a bit of my ego, I mean look. You see this thing Geezer? Can humans even mate with this tiny thing?"

My eyes doubled their size. Oh my Stars he's talking about...

"It's quite pitiful in comparison to your erm...usual '_glory_'," Kamek spoke casually as if he were only speaking of the weather. My cheeks bled with heat; Bowser was so _shameless_.

"Right? It's so _small_ and _weird_ lookin—"

"_Ahem_!" Kammy snapped, "Enough of this. Lord Bowser, I am clothing you properly."

There was a sparkle of light, and an accompanying _ping_!

"Alright, he is decent now princess."

I turned around and Bowser was clothed. Unsurprisingly he wore the same spiked collar and leather bands. The king was dressed in a long, dark overcoat that billowed behind his legs with matching dark jeans and a tee shirt. Causal, dangerous and somehow refined and regal, the look was so him.

Bowser growled, his voice lacking the animalistic edge, "I don't get shoes. These are so dumb. How can humans walk without feeling the ground under their feet?"

I laughed as he glared at his black sneakers, "Why do they cover your feet? What's the point of them? It feels frickin' weird."

"My apologies Lord Bowser," Kammy fiddled with her spectacles, "I tried to find the most comfortable footwear for your royal feet and the humans on Mushroompedia claim these as the most comfortable footwear."

"Hmm...feels weird. Constricting even."

Bowser met my stare and grinned. He took a step forward and wobbled, nearly falling over until I darted at his side and steadied him. This felt so strange, I could actually bolster his weight.

Bowser laughed, "Once I get used to moving without a tail. We're gonna hit the town as an innocuous human couple. If we're going undercover, then you must too princess."

I shrugged, "Alright."

It wasn't more than half an hour later when I returned. Bowser had passed the time by working on his balance. By the time I returned he was walking like a model down the runaway. I guess the saying is true: you can't keep an arrogant Koopa-turned-man down.

I showed up dressed in a blue long-sleeve shirt, old jeans with ripped knees and blue sneaks; gone was the overdone princess Sarasaland.

Bowser eyed my form appraisingly, "Looks good. _Real_ good. I'm gonna have to make a note to get more of those human pants for you."

"Oh jeans?"

"Yeah gems, gents, whatever they are. Your legs are long as hell." Then a mutter under his breath, "Stars almighty I'd _climb _those shapely _things_ like a Kong in a tree..."

"Jeans. And w-what did you say?"

I must have heard him wrong. He placed a hand on my shoulder, and beamed, "I said let's go. You ready for a night out? You look stunning as always."

I laughed, "Thanks. I don't think I need to tell you you're...uh..."

"I'm _what_?" He grinned wickedly.

I blushed, "Y-You're...You..."

"Yes?" He crooned, red eyes bright with anticipation. He had a crazy, large grin and was nearly standing on top of me, "_Yeeeees_?"

"You're...pretty cute..." My cheeks flamed.

Bowser chuckled thickly and ran his hand through his hair in a conceited manner, "I see. If I was human you'd be _all_ over me. Probably trying to have your way with me at every turn and demanding I give you gorgeous children. And as a _gentleman_ I would oblige for _your_ sake."

I sneered, "I hope you enjoyed that 'cause I'm _never_ complimenting you _again_."

He roared with laughter, "Fine! I'll tone it down. Now let's bounce."

He sniffed audibly and frowned, "Whoa, I don't like this."

"Like what?"

"I can't smell you," he frowned, "no hormones, pheromones, fear, _nothing_."

"Koopa senses _are_ superior," I smirked.

He continued to sniff loudly then swung his head back before catapulting forward as he buried his head into my neck and whiffed. He even emitted a moan of pleasure. Blushing, I lightly shoved him away, "Bowser?! _W-What the hell?!_"

Kamek burst out laughing but one painful scepter-bop from Kammy quieted him.

"_Oh Stars_," his eyes rolled with pleasure, "there's that scent I lo—I mean yeah. You're right. Human senses are so muted."

"That's another thing," I snapped, cheeks red, "Humans and Koopas have different social norms. Don't bury your face in the neck of every girl you see!"

"Right."

"Good to kno—"

He grinned wickedly, "I'll only use _your_ neck as my personal cushion."

"Wait what?"

"Time's money," he laughed, "Let's go, Cutie pie."

We headed to the clown car which was strange since only Bowser the Koopa piloted it. It was odd walking beside him; he had the same arrogant strut but he was housed in a soft, fleshy human package.

"You look uneasy," he mused, "What's goin' through your head?"

"Look at you!" I laughed, "You're a...human! It's weird! It feels like some strange guy is holding me."

A really buff, handsome guy but a stranger nonetheless.

"Heh this is weird," he laughed, "I mean you're still small but we fit...if that makes sense. You're like...the right size for me."

I arched an eyebrow, "Since I've been human longer, you're the right size for me."

He grinned, "I can handle that."

So we went out and did 'human things'. His definition of 'human things' was a bit...odd.

We ate at a small mom 'n' pop restaurant themed around the sixties: the waitresses glided by on skates and served burgers, hand stirred shakes, and homemade toppings.

Bowser ordered the largest burger and devoured, attacking with animalistic fervor.

I guess he still loved meat. Patrons watched him eat with contrasting expressions. Either they were amused or terribly disgusted. I ate a baby burger, eating at a pace to actually enjoy and digest my food. The waitress placed a tall ice cream shake between us and inserted two long straws.

"Enjoy!" She chirruped.

This seemed to please Bowwy, "Okay! Pick up your straw and let's drink together! I've seen human couples do this in tons of movies and it's my turn!"

I laughed, discarding the paper cover, "You're really excited over that?"

We shared a strawberry shake, slurping together. He practically glowed with glee. He even halted a couple on their way out, "Hey you! Take a picture."

The stranger smiled, "Sure!"

Then Bowser dug through his jacket and tossed over his very large, Koopa-sized cell. The man's eyes doubled and he nearly fell over from the large weight of the cellphone, "Wholly damn this phone is huge, Bro!"

The picture was taken, a straw in our mouths as we drank together. Bowser studied the picture with an unusually soft look, "Perfect."

The waitress brought our bill, smiling, "Here you go. You two are such a gorgeous couple."

I blushed, "We're not t-toget—"

Bowser took the bill and smirked, "Thanks. Good-lookin' pair eh?"

"Very," she laughed.

When she skated away, I glared at Bowwy, "What were you thinking?!"

"Hey, I can't help what people think," his red eyes glinted puckishly, "And who can blame 'em? Two sexy people together? They probably wonder how cute our kids will be."

I gasped, "Bowser!"

"What?" He purred, "Don't think we'd have cute lil' redheaded babies?"

"Bowser!" I blushed as he guffawed.

"Right," Bowser feigned thoughtfulness, "Your dad has black hair, so one of the kids _might_ have dark hair."

I elbowed him in the sternum. I completely forgot he didn't have a shell, and probably wasn't used to such abuse.

He wasn't.

His eyes grew wide as he doubled over, clutching at his side as he wheezed, "W-What the hell was that for?!"

"I'm sorry!" I cried, "I forgot you're not a Koopa anymore!"

"Urgh," he groaned, casting a dirty look my way, "Shit. No _wonder_ human males take you seriously. You can kick their asses in a single blow. You got a blackbelt in ass-kicking or something?! Argh, damn that hurt!"

My cheeks blazed red, "I-I'm sorry! I just...I just knocked the air out of you. I forgot you didn't have a shell..."

With labored effort, he played it off. It must have really hurt though as his face was still a bright red. He grinned, "Well for the rest of the night, you're going to take my advances and do nothing but blush. I deserve it after that karate chop from hell."

"Wha?"

"When I call you sexy," he laughed, "You will take it. Got it?"

I blushed, "...Fine."

"Now come on then Gorgeous," he grinned larger at my blush, "Let's do the next human couple thing."

Seeing a movie? That counts as a human thing?!

Koopas think strange things about us. We decided on a silly comedy, making sure to load up on sweets and buttery popcorn before we took our seats. He tipped the confession stand worker when he complimented how we were a 'good-looking couple.' But remember this was Bowser, when he tipped people it was ridiculous.

"Buy yourself something extra nice with it."

The concession worker gaped at the tip, peering at Bowser incredulously. We entered the theater and Bowser nudged me in the side, "If we go to the back row no one will see us make out," he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows.

"And that's why we're sitting in the middle row," I grunted.

"Oh? Don't care who sees huh? _Ohoho_ you naughty girl you!"

"Oh Stars take me now."

We took our seats and as the show began, I realized something. Bowser yawned, leaning over and pulling out the clichéd, tired move as he stretched his arm around the back of my chair. I stared at him as he grinned smugly.

"You're as discreet as a wiggler on drugs," I laughed.

He laughed, "Yeah? Well you're as pretty as a flower."

"What is—?"

He stuck the strawberry slushie straw into my mouth, grinning.

Apparently the mol-E-culer didn't curb his insane appetite. He bought ten different treats at the concession stand and ate like a wild hog, stuffing buttered popcorn in his mouth with a frenzied zest.

The movie was hilarious and with each joke, he laughed rancorously, spraying the row ahead of him with a mouthful of popcorn. The movie-goers—who were getting showered with slobbery popcorn were pissed.

Some annoyed patrons turned around to shoot meaningful glares his way, but the second they saw just how _massive_ he was, the dirty looks stopped. I shook my head; we probably would have been reported but even as a human, Bowser still manages to instill fear into others.

"_What is 3.14?_" The actor onscreen wondered out loud.

A second actor suddenly popped up with a crazy grin on his face, _"It's pie!"_

A pie was suddenly thrown into the face of the main character and Bowser exploded with laughter, slamming his fists against his seat as he sprayed more popcorn.

And since Bowser was Bowser, when he spoke, he was nearly yelling; did anyone ever teach him about social graces!? "Stars this guy is stupid! Did you see that Flower?! It was like boom! Pie in your face!"

I laughed, "It was funny but not that funny!"

He was still half-shouting, half-laughing, "Then why are you laughing!?"

I had tears now, "Because you're laughing and yelling! Keep it down loudmouth!"

He guffawed harder, squeezing me against his torso in half a hug, "This is some funny-ass stuff!"

The patrons who had once been politely ignoring Bowser's loud tirade laughed at his silly antics and his laughter was infectious. A few of them hushed him nicely, but of course every party has a pooper right?

"Hey! Keep it down! We're trying to watch a movie!"

"_Shh _Flower, don't be so noisy. Act like you've been somewhere for Stars sake," and with that Bowser went back to shoveling more treats in his mouth, chewing as fast as a rabbit.

I stared at him incredulously; he was telling me to be quiet!? Oh the irony, "Hey Mcidiot face, he was talking to _you_."

"No he wasn't. As a person who clearly values his life, he wouldn't be so stupid to—"

"To the guy on steroids, be quiet would you!? Sheesh!"

I smirked as Bowser's eyes narrowed. There should have been a billow of smoke from his nostrils. Affronted, Bowser stood up in the middle of the movie and loudly declared, "Why don't you shut the hell up and I won't come down there, kick your ass and top it all off with throwing you in a dumpster!?"

"Bowser! Sit down!" I hissed, tugging at his jacket.

By now the movie audience watched the spectacle, as the mouthy patron declared, "Get bent pal!"

The next thing I knew Bowser was trying to climb over seats to kick the guy's ass. A couple of nearby movie goers helped me hold him back. Bowser looked completely murderous, trying his best to get at the antagonist.

"Calm down, bro. Let's just watch the movie, alright?"

"He had a point, you were pretty loud, man."

"And you were spitting all over the place…"

I held Bowser back, "He's not even worth it."

The same antagonist spoke once more, "Listen to your girlfriend, Steroids. Then heel and sit after since she has you on a leash."

"Flower?" He snarled.

I handed him the slushie, "Violence is not the key. But if you throw this, you had better hit him."

Bowser grinned wickedly, "Your wish is my command milady."

The next thing I knew, a jumbo strawberry slushy had been hurled and hit the obnoxious movie-goer clean on the head with an explosion of syrupy liquid.

The guy toppled over with a squeal and Bowser turned to the movie-goers behind him. Some viewers pretended to ignore the spectacle, others gave him disapproving stares, and others gaped.

One guy was laughing, "That was a damn good shot pal!"

"Sorry to disturb your movie," Bowser spoke, standing as if he were giving a speech to his citizens and not a random crowd, "But that guy was askin' for it. And who am I to deny something someone asks for?"

"Bowser, _sit down_," I hissed.

A woman shot a reproachful look Bowser's way, "You could have handled that better. Do it again, and I'm calling the staff."

Her date next to her poked her in the side, "Honey, be quiet. That guy is _massive_."

Pleased, Bowser sat down and the theater resumed their laughter. The guy who had been hit with the slushy glared every now and then at Bowser but did nothing.

Who would be so dumb as to tick him off? He may not have been a Koopa but he was easily six and a half feet tall and jacked.

While Bowser was occupied munching on popcorn, I rubbed up against a muscular arm and smirked.

_Really jacked._

* * *

><p>Then we went to the theater's arcade, which unsurprisingly he choose to play the violent games. You know, the games where you shot people and gallons of blood spattered the screen? Or the fighting games where you upper-cutted people's heads off?<p>

Yep, Bowser loved those. He mashed buttons like crazy, tongue-lolling out of his mouth as he concentrated all his effort into winning. Was it weird he always played as the most skanky, scantily-clad girl character?

"She kinda looks like you, Flower."

Offended, I arched an indelicate brow as I studied my "clone". I looked like her? The skanky, buxom redhead whose every other word was a sexual innuendo!? I look like _her_!?

"_Did I give it to ya good enough_?" She purred, sensuously posing after a victory. Her boobs even jiggled as she laughed. I arched a dubious eyebrow at Bowser.

And I look like her? _Yeeeaaah._

We headed passed the loud tinkles and explosions of videogames and the air table caught his eye.

"Wanna lose in some air hockey?" He asked, "I've never played it.

"Please," I laughed, "I played air hockey and owned so many people. Be prepared to join that list."

Bowser had to be the only person I knew who was cocky about something he's never tried. And he paid for such trespass accordingly. He got his ass kicked!

With each score, he growled, cursed violently or smashed his fist against the console. He was terrible! It was like he couldn't defend against anything right up the middle!

I was laughing and by the time we finished the score was 16-0.

Who loses 16 zip?!

"Do your motor skills not work or something?!" I laughed, "Did you never play against any of your maids or servants?"

"Of course I did," he growled, "and they always took their losses like saps."

I froze, "Wait...you played against people who just _let_ you win?!"

He looked puzzled, "Who the hell would challenge _me_ and be dumb enough to try to kick my ass?!"

I laughed, "Well no wonder why you _suck so bad_! Everyone just lets you win!"

Why is this not surprising?! To over inflate their king's monstrous ego, everyone lets him remain the unchallenged victor. And now that he had a taste of the ass-kicking I gave him, he couldn't handle it!

This whole situation had me laughing like a hyena. As Bowser ground his jaw angrily, I decided to rub it in.

"Aww _Bowwy_," I laughed, "don't be so hard on yourself! Everyone loses their first go."

He sneered as I reached up and tickled his chin, "Aww, don't be a widdle sore loser Bowwy-Wowwy poo. I know it hurts to get your assy-wassy kicked."

He suddenly grinned, "You're absolutely right."

I grinned, "Glad you can see it my way."

"I should reward the victor with her spoils," he grinned, "a nice wet kiss."

"Uh that's okay I'll pass!"

"I wonder what a human kiss feels like!"

He leaned forward, puckering his lips in a rather exaggerated, repulsive manner, "Kissy! Kissy!"

I laughed, holding him at bay, "Bowser! Stars! Koopa or human you're still crazy!"

Laughing, he pulled me into a hug. There were no leathery scales, just cloth and human flesh, "As long as I'm your kind of crazy."

"It's okay," I patted his shoulder, "You can let go now."

He smirked, intentionally not releasing me.

"Go ahead and let go...just...let the hell go."

He was laughing.

"Bowser! Let go you beefcake!" I was laughing now, wiggling and fighting to get out of his grasp.

"Ooh, keep on doin' that, I like you rubbing against me."

"Bowser!"

He laughed, finally letting go, "Let's blow this place. I've got one last humany place to take you, Sugarloaf."

_Humany place._ This whole day I've learned what Bowser's definition of being human meant. His perspective was a little weird, and maybe even dated, but I still had fun with him.

I smiled, "Well then, let's go! "

* * *

><p>A night time stroll around the park, huh? It seems Bowser's interpretation of human culture were influenced by clichéd 1940's movies.<p>

Though I won't lie, this was nice. The twilight air was cool and refreshing and the stars were just starting to make their cameos in the night sky.

Bowser leaned over and asked in a silly, overdone gentlemanly voice, "Enjoying yourself, O fair princess?"

I laughed and answered back in a stereotypical, dainty voice, "Indeed I am, my most gracious King!"

We both laughed, settling into a comfortable lull of silence. Bowser chuckled," Stars I miss my tail," he suddenly sighed, "I was expecting it to wag and then..._nothing_."

I grinned, "Aww I'm sorry!"

As he continued to prescribe the new changes experienced with morphing into a human, we walked past an older couple who were resting on a nearby bench. They seemed kind and watched us with a fond twinkle in their eyes.

Bowser must have noticed them too as he turned and gave a friendly nod their way.

When the elderly couple thought we were out of hearing range, they curled together and spoke a little louder than they wished, "They make a gorgeous couple don't they?" one older woman whispered to her husband.

"A good-looking pair for sure."

A...couple?

Right. When a guy and a girl were together they were always viewed as romantic interests. And since we were both humans, we were seen as a couple. Bowser must have noticed my irritated expression, "What's that look for?"

"They think we're a couple," I grumbled, "Apparently everyone does... "

"Great!" Bowser was grinning, " Then let's show 'em how a real couple kisses."

"Public affection is shameful in human culture. I'm not gonna let some guy—"

"Hey!" He crossed his arms and arched an eyebrow, "I'm not just '_some guy_!'"

"—K-kiss me in public."

His expression darkened with carnal intention, "Then in _private_?"

This was odd, everywhere we went, we were grouped together as a couple. Bowser didn't seem the least bit bothered by it, if anything he seemed happy. And he never went out of his way to correct the error when I was referred as his girlfriend.

We approached a lake and I stared at my reflection. The starry sky glowed in the lake with thousands of glinting diamonds. Moments later the tall, robust form of Bowser appeared by my side.

Even as a human he still had the same dangerous half-grin. It was so strange, seeing the same features; the unruly spiky mane, spiked chokers and intense red eyes in a face that was so foreign.

"We match..." I spoke softly, staring at our reflections.

His grin grew bigger, "We make an amazingly sexy couple don't you think?"

I laughed softly, "Yeah."

We...did look good together. Hell, honestly human Bowser would probably look good with any girl. Tall, handsome, built again who wouldn't he look well with?

"So to seal off an amazing night," he spoke in a soft voice and as a Koopa he would have been purring, "why not seal it with...a kiss?"

I realized he was already leaning in for a kiss. His eyes were nearly completely closed and I could feel a ghost of warm breath against my face. Alarm and panic flared like fireworks as I blushed, turning away so his lips could hit the side of my cheek instead.

But he halted long before then, completely alert and shocked. He slowly moved back, disbelief and a twinge of anger glowing on his features, "You...turned away...I thought you'd..."

He paused. With no more words, he turned away suddenly. One moment his eyes were closed, a deep scowl saturating his features and then the next he was glaring balefully across the serene lake.

"Did I do something wrong?" he whispered.

"No..." guilt was filling up inside of me like a well," We've had fun and...You look amazing. Y-You're a really handsome guy."

"Why do I feel a but coming on?"

"_But_," I laughed, "It feels weird being with you. Maybe not weird but it doesn't feel right in this form."

Bowser looked confused, "I thought you'd...enjoy being normal."

"Normal?"

"Yeah," he averted his gaze, cheeks glowing faintly pink, "It's normal for you to be with another human. And no one would bat an eye. Hell, people were congratulating us on being such a cute couple. People were openly congratulating and nudging me for 'scoring' a babe like you."

I halted; he wanted me to experience a night, an opportunity at normality; without the derision and scorn a human-Koopa couple would receive. It was nice for a change not receiving one million stares for being together and keeping a low profile was a cake walk. But...it didn't feel right.

I missed the thunderous footfall, the clanking of his spiked bracers and the subtle scent of smoke that lingered on his person. I missed the majestic pearlescent horns and the glory of his looming height and fierce spiked shell. I missed the Koopa.

"When we were out tonight," Bowser stared at the lake, eyes narrowed in thought, "It was awesome. Everyone thought you and I were together. And look."

His hand grasped mine; rough, strong hands that belonged to a hard-working man who toiled in his profession, "Like you said we match. You're just the right size for me in this form; I can hug without worry of crushing you, I look right when I'm beside you, I can't explain it but it feels right."

He walked over, large warm fingers touching my face. He spoke softly, red eyes glowing with warmth, "And by the tips of your pretty little toes you can reach me with a kiss. I really am just the right size for you."

As he continued to gauge my expression with an unusual softness, an admiration even, I blushed, "T-There has to be some things you don't like about this form."

"Hell there's a lot!" He laughed, "No swishing tail, dulled senses like sight and smell; I can barely see at night! No wonder why you humans freak out in darkness. Can't see jackshit unless it's right in front of your fleshy nose. No shell—I feel super vulnerable, I'm puny, this body lacks height and strength, I have no claws but worst of all I can't blow fire and roar like a stud!"

I grinned, "Why am I not surprised you'd miss fire-blowing?"

"And these clothes?!" He glared at his jacket, "Ugh so restricting! I just wanna rip 'em off. Shells are far more comfy."

I laughed, "Please don't!"

He smirked, "Don't think I haven't noticed how you stare."

"...Huh?"

He looked smug," You've been eying me up and down like a carnivore at a butcher."

My cheeks flamed, "Y-You look different, why wouldn't I stare?!"

"You stare because you think I'm mad sexy," his laughter bloomed, "if you want to drag me to bed and have your way with this bod then I only ask you won't manhandle me too badly. I've been told princesses repress a lot of kinky fantasies..."

"I stare," I snarled, cheeks hot, "Because I'm not used to you looking like this! It's weird."

"Weird?" The confident grin faltered, "You don't like me better...like this?"

"Normal for me is being around a large, strong Koopa," I grinned.

A red brow was arched, "So you...?"

I grinned, "While extremely fine, I prefer you as a Koopa."

"There's only one way to prove that," he spoke softly, fingering the mol-E-culer absently, "You wouldn't kiss a stranger but would you kiss a familiar, handsome Koopa?"

I blushed, "Can't it be a hug?"

"Nope," he smirked, "it has to be a kiss."

"I...would..." His grin stretched as I looked down, toeing my sneaks in the grass, "rather k-kiss Koopa-Bowser than human-Bowser," I spluttered.

He grinned and touched my face. I felt a faint brush of lips as my heart leapt in my chest. There was a bright flash of light and a pair of lips touched mine.

The familiar rough texture had ease slipping into my bones and relaxation unwinding my anxieties. This time when he pulled away, gone was the handsome beefcake and looming overhead was Bowser; horns, scales, dangerous smile and all.

I laughed, noticing he still wore the human clothes which had ripped and tattered once he returned to normal height and musculature.

"Perfect," I smiled.

"Prefer the beast over prince charming huh?" He smiled, "You really are kinda kooky."

I smiled, "Maybe."

We walked back to the clown car. I realized he was trying to 'discreetly' take my hand. I laughed and slipped my hand into his. I peered at him with a sly smile that made him blush.

"Guess that wasn't as smooth as I'd like," he whispered.

I laughed, "Maybe but it got me to take your hand."

His ego returned as a slick grin appeared, "CasaKoopa strikes again!"

"Hey Flower."

"Yeah?"

"Did you see when I nailed that guy with the slushy?"

I laughed, "You got him good!"

"The drink flew like a laser and exploded all over him!" Bowser laughed, "And then he was like 'Oh!' What a sissy."

We both laughed.

**Alice: Hope you guys enjoyed the treat! Next up is the actual chapter! (waves) ^_^**

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><p><strong><em>Beta by: BI0<em>**

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><p><em>Daisy is the tomboyish, clumsy yet fiery princess of Sarasaland and King Bowser is absolutely smitten. As a result chaos, turmoil and humor ensues. Why? Because things are never easy for the desert blossom.<em>

**oOoOoOo Tomboy and The Beast oOoOoOo**

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><p>The thin air in palace Aqualandia was a few degrees warmer than freezing. Councilor Ztarlight shivered where he stood; teeth clenched together tightly as he clasped his numb fingers together beneath his thick cloak.<p>

The desert air at night was mercilessly cold, but this foreign Aqualandian air held so much moisture, it felt so much colder and yet as Taurus sat, perched on his throne, he seemed unfazed. Ztarlight eyed the prince with no small amount of disdain as Taurus comfortably drained his wine, unaffected by the cold.

"Cold are we, Councilman?" Taurus eyed him with faint amusement. Under the soft moonlight his silver eyes seemed to glow.

"Any _reasonable_ human being should be," Ztarlight grunted, "It's absolutely miserable, and we're in doors."

"You're just being melodramatic," Taurus laughed lowly, "My ancestors have endured this weather for centuries, the moisture, the cold, it doesn't bother most Aqualandians, save for the very young and the elderly. Just as your people are nicely acclimated to the sweltering heat."

"Yes but this cold is inhuman."

Taurus arched a brow, "Perhaps I can have a few guards bring in a heater."

"That's not necessary. Let's just get to business. The sooner we finish, the sooner I can return to hot, warm, desert air."

"Very well then," Taurus purred, "Councilor Ztarlight, I'm glad you've been able to make your appointment, though you could have taken more care to be less tardy."

"Forgive me Prince Taurus, but taking extra precautions were absolutely necessary to ensure our..._privacy_. The emperor is very careful in regards to monitoring the comings and goings of his palace staff. Coming here was no simple task."

"Very well then," Taurus took a meticulous sip of his wine, "Thirsty?"

Ztarlight waved off the offer, "I am fine, Prince."

"Now that the pleasantries are done, let's get to business, shall we?" Taurus purred, silver eyes tightening, "You'll have to forgive me for being so blunt, but after these past few days, I've found myself losing patience for this entire debacle. I am tired of the paparazzi hounding my family, following my mother and harassing her. I do not like discord, in fact I despise it with a passion. My asking price shall be high."

"Then that makes two of us who hate strife," Ztarlight nodded, "candidly state your terms but be aware that _your _kingdom has ultimately disenfranchised us. _We_ are lacking water needed to sustain our people; that's worth far more than your emotional distress."

"To be frank," Taurus leaned forward, eyes glittering like quicksilver, "I'd like to see the emperor _dead._"

Ztarlight laughed largely, incredibly, "_That's_ not happening."

"And why not? Think of yourself for a moment. With the emperor gone, your little pathetic Desert princess will be forced to rule. She's young, inexperienced, and unwed," Taurus continued, smiling, "She'll become the largest liability you've had the pleasure of saving. She'll be the puppet queen that your council can control absolutely."

Ztarlight snorted, "As tempting as the idea is to control the little wild child, that is not within the best interest for Sarasaland."

"'Not in the best interest for _Sarasaland_'?" Taurus laughed mockingly, "A little hypocritical isn't it? Meeting with a foe of your kingdom and yet you claim to act in _'Sarasaland's best interest_.'"

"Fine then. It is not in _my_ best interest," Ztarlight smiled thinly, "Now are we going to talk business or are we going to discuss the finer points of human morality? Emperor Sakuro must live and I will hear nothing else."

"And yet I want him _dead_."

"The Emperor lives, as I have no quarrel with him whatsoever. To lose the king would be insane; he is an exceptional ruler, he is intelligent, he reads people well, the soldiers respect him, the citizens respect him, even the council respects him. The king is a wondrous leader...until matters involve his child."

Taurus paused, eyes narrowed," So then you have a quarrel with the princess, yes?"

"The emperor isn't to be discussed," Ztarlight waved the idea away, "though the princess on the other hand, I am willing to be a bit more..._lenient_."

The Aqualandian prince laughed deeply, "My word, she's certainly pissed off a lot of men, hasn't she?" Then he paused, swirling his wine goblet as he mused aloud, "Princess Sarasaland..."

"I want her to remain alive," Ztarlight interjected quickly, even a little solemnly, "I may not like the boorish young thing, but I will not see a young Desert girl dead."

"Oh I wasn't planning on having her killed," Taurus hummed lightheartedly. As he spoke, he traced his fingers over the outer rim of his wineglass, "Well then let's return to my original bargain price. The very same one I offered your emperor in fact. I want your Princess as a gift."

"_Bah_, Sakuro isn't going to stand for that. Either you make his daughter a respectable bride or it won't do," Ztarlight laughed, "Sakuro would _gladly_ pick up arms and start a war if he believed you were whoring his daughter. Even at the expense of Sarasaland he would fight for his child."

"Marry the wild child, hmm? The jewel of the Desert," Taurus leaned back in his plush throne, meditating on the thought. What would that be like?

He suddenly saw a riptide of wild, curly red hair and a hot blaze of defiant hauteur glowing in dark blue eyes. Such a spirited little mare, the little thing even had the audacity to spew fire and set him aflame.

No. She _breathed_ fire. Like a dragon, like a Koopa. What kind of a woman breathes fire? What would she be like as his wife? What would she be like in bed?

The thought had Taurus laughing; again he saw a flicker of her rebellious dark blue eyes and wondered what they looked like when they were filled with the haze of lust. He would have all the time in the universe to break her fiery will. She would learn to obey his word, his will.

She would become his wife and submit. She would learn to enjoy all the pleasures he would bring her. She would fight in the beginning yes, but he would enjoy smoothing out her wild streak. He would have the privilege, the pleasure to take all night doing so.

The Aqualandian prince grinned wickedly, "The prospect of owning your princess has piqued my interest. But, if what you say about the emperor is true, then I cannot simply kidnap the girl. That will start a war. What will you have me do then?"

"You'll think of something," Ztarlight grinned, teeth bright against the darkness of the room, "Force Sarasaland to have to marry off the princess. The last thing we want, we need is a war. Our water reserves run dangerously low and the citizenry have been alerted to ration their water use. Through marrying our princess, you can save our people. Remember that."

"Don't you need an heir to run your kingdom someday?" Taurus smirked, "Surely the emperor isn't _that _young."

"Sakuro will be fine," Ztarlight assured, "Once you take the princess as your bride, the emperor will remarry a high ranking councilwoman. She will be young and will sire his future heir to the throne. Sakuro isn't quite as young as he once was, but he is still young enough, handsome enough that most women will not see his years as a burden."

Taurus hummed thoughtfully, "Very well then. I will start planning accordingly. Though I will require very specific information about Sarasaland palace, its infrastructure and any valuable resources concerning your guards."

Ztarlight nodded, "And you will have it very soon."

Taurus grinned, "Superb." He rose to his feet and made his way down from the elevated throne in several long, elegant strides. The young prince approached until he was a foot away from the elderly councilman.

With an amused smirk, Taurus eyed the old man. He certainly wasn't much to look at; Ztarlight was old and shriveled and hunched over from age but who knew what a gem this treacherous little old man would be.

Taurus extended his arm and shook Ztarlight's hand in a firm grip, smiling largely, "It was a pleasure doing business with you. We will remain in contact, correct?"

"Absolutely, Your Highness. If I may, I will take my leave of you now."

"See you soon," Taurus laughed softly, "And enjoy the rest of your evening."

Ztarlight nodded before turning on his heel and heading for the exit. It wasn't even seconds later when Aqualandian guards appeared. Their glossy armor glinted under the dim candlelight as they guided Ztarlight through the palace.

Taurus returned to the throne, making sure to grab the half-empty wine bottle and began heading towards the master bedroom.

He entered his quarters, disrobed quietly and then lay in bed. He was tired, eyes strained and burning from fatigue but even as he tried to close his eyes and rest, peace alluded him. The only thing that wait for him within sleep's confinement were vivid nightmares. Might as well polish off the last of the alcohol until sleep came to him sweetly.

Taurus continued consuming the light, delicious wine until his head swam pleasantly and his vision blurred. He was finally nearing that blissful, happy incoherence as warmth flushed his body and his thoughts danced merrily in his head.

His eyelids were finally growing heavy and as he drifted off into sleep, he dreamt of Sarasaland being in ruin and Princess Daisy on her knees pleading, crying as she begged him for mercy.

The sheets shifted and two pale, slender arms wrapped around the Prince's lean torso. Taurus smiled as he felt soft, warm feminine lips press against his cheekbone and sensuously drag across his collarbone. Soon enough, everything would come into fruition and Sarasaland would never see it coming.

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><p>The desert morning was cool, the dawn air still sweet and fresh as I finished another lap around the palace's perimeter. Sunrise bore a rosy pink skyline and provided enough natural light for my jog.<p>

As I ran, I waved to several guards stationed near their posts. Most of the palace patrol returned my friendly wave while others simply watched.

Though my usual morning jog route had been strategically dissected and rerouted to be closer to both guards and the palace, it felt good to workout.

Jogging, exercising was familiar. To once again have my pulse jump in rhythm with my steps, to have my footfall stamp the earth in a monotonous cadence, and to finally focus on something that completely stole my attention away from the Aqualandian fiasco felt amazing.

I rounded one last corner before the palace came into view. I jogged up the stairs where Lady Angora waited patiently. The sight of my messy hair and sweaty face made her cerise lips twist into a displeased pucker.

Lady Angora swept closer and cringed as she plucked an errant, sweaty curl from my glistening forehead. She scrunched her nose, "Stars princess, it's not even sun up and already you've managed to become so..._sweaty."_

"It feels good," I panted, smiling as my adrenaline blazed through my veins, "You ought to join me next time."

"How kind of you, but I'm afraid I'll have to pass." With a wave of her slim hand, a young maid approached with a frosted water bottle and a clean towel. I smiled and thanked her before accepting both items.

Angora motioned for my follow and I quickly fell into step behind her, greedily gulping down the cool drink, "Now that your jog is out of the way, I hope I will have your complete attention. The Emperor will be quite busy today and I'm afraid he won't join you for dinner. I have a few things we ought to look over today. Firstly..."

While Lady Angora disliked most of my recreational activities, since a good number of them involved athletics that were unfit for a princess, she had pulled some strings so I could have a morning jog.

This was no small thing; she had to have meticulously rearranged the palace security's schedules and perhaps even had several men change shifts to compensate the early hours of my jog.

As I followed the sweeping, rose folds of Angora's chiffon gown, I realized that not only was a show of gratitude in order, but after she'd done so much, it would have been unspeakably rude not to have said something.

She was still firing off today's itinerary, "—hoping to have some time with Princess Toadstool so we could go over some etiquette lessons today. And perhaps if I'm pleased with your progress, I might allow an hour of tennis added into your schedule. Though I'd have to contact your young instructor, Miss Plum. She's quite a sweet young lady, isn't she? I'll—"

"Lady Angora?"

"Hm? Yes?" Though her face remained perfectly composed, her words had a slight edge to them, "What is it princess? I _was_ speaking."

"I know it took a lot of effort for you to make this happen, so really, thanks." And just to show how sincere I was, I performed a very formal Sarasalandian bow.

Lady Angora's gait came to a complete stop as she spun to face me. I nearly laughed the moment her brows rose so high they vanished against her dark hairline.

For a moment she seemed surprised. A slow smile unfurled upon her burgundy lips, "You're certainly welcome, Princess. Now come along, we have much to attend to."

As I was toweling sweat from my face, a pair of tiny, feminine hands suddenly cupped my eyes, "Guess _whoooo~?"_

Not that I didn't recognize her voice, but her exclusive strawberry perfume was a dead giveaway as well. I smirked, "Hi Peach."

Then like always, she tried to change the pitch of her voice into a masculine range, but she really just sounded like a drunk Wario imitation, "Uh...Peach? No...It's-a me. Lumario."

I pulled away, shooting a grin her way, "Lumario? Wha—? What is _that_!? Like the combination of Mario and Luigi?"

Peach was already laughing, "Well, it _was_ the first thing I could think of so..."

"Stars, that was _awful_. It was so bad Peach."

We both burst into silly chortles as I snorted loudly. Peach laughed louder, "You sound like a pig!"

"I do _not_!"

I rolled my eyes and shoved her shoulder only to have Peach return the blow. I smirked and raised an eyebrow in challenge; oh? Did my sweet, pacifistic cousin want to get into it?

I practiced Desert judo and started most of my days practicing Sand katas. But this was only going to be play fighting so I wouldn't _really_ do anything to hurt her.

Besides I've only given her a black eye, what once?

_Twice?_

More than twice? Okay, this time will be different. I will _not_ use a roundhouse. Just as I planned on putting Peach in a headlock, Lady Angora pointedly cleared her throat and we both stopped.

She peered at the both of us with unimpressed, lowered eyelids, "_Honestly ladies_. Princess Sarasaland is sweaty and Princess Toadstool is clad in a nightgown. Both of you make yourselves decent this_ instant_! There are foreign sovereigns present and it will not do to see the both of you like this. Now shoo."

Peach laughed, "Well, it's better than when Daisy was a young girl. Remember? She used to kick off her skirts so she could run around and play tag."

Face flushed red, I growled, "Firstly I was six! _Six!_ And secondly you promised you wouldn't tell anyone about that!"

Peach's smile was nowhere near sweet; this was the side of Peach most people didn't see. She was ladylike and gracious in the public eye, but amongst her closest friends and kin, she was peppery and mischievous. That, and she never ran out of blackmail stories. _Damn._

Lady Angora cleared her throat in a way that sounded suspicious, as if she was really holding back a laugh, "Well then ladies, you are both quite indecent and I will not have you two parading around in scandalous attire. Now upstairs and quickly."

"And choose your nicest gown we're going to have a tea party!" Peach exclaimed happily, clapping her hands together.

I toweled my sweaty, frizzy hair, "With who?"

"Oh, with King Bowser, Mario dear and Luigi," Peach peered up dreamily, "I hope that's okay. I've asked the servants to set it up in that nice, pretty garden near the palace and I've had them send out invitations."

"Huh? Oh, you mean in the white sand gardens?" I asked.

"Yes!" Peach chirruped, "Oh it's so pretty and magical! Especially when the lights glow at night, it becomes like a wonderland..."

"Ladies," Lady Angora spun to face us. Our laughter died away the moment we took in her unusually sober expression. Something was wrong; even though Lady Angora was composed and at times severe, rarely did she openly show it in her expressions, "Princess Sarasaland, in light of recent events, I have a...lesson I think we ought to look over. Of course Princess Toadstool you are very much welcomed to attend."

Peach and I exchanged a quick quizzical glance before I faced Angora again, "Yes...sure."

"I'll attend as well," Peach murmured softly, "Expanding one's horizon is always a gift."

"Very well then. After you both dress, accompany me to the kitchens."

And with that she turned and flounced away. Peach and I exchanged another glance before heading upstairs. Peach tapped her chin in thought, "I wonder where that came from..."

"Yeah...me too...It's like she did a complete one eighty."

"Come on," Peach smiled, "Let's get the lesson done and then I can show you your beautiful outfit. It'll be perfect for our tea party. I have a new dress myself."

"I'm not a life-sized doll," I muttered under my breath.

Peach grinned, tapping her finger against my nose, "But you're _my _life-sized doll. Now, let's go!"

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><p>After a quick shower and throwing on my signature yellow dress, Peach and I ventured towards the kitchens. We hadn't even hit the stairwell and there was Angora, standing a few feet from my door.<p>

"I thought you wanted to meet in the kitchen?" I asked.

Angora's expression was frigid, "We're on a tight schedule here. I have to meet with a few of the court ladies. Let's go," and with a pivot of her heel, Lady Angora began to lead us to the palace kitchens. Peach peered at me curiously but I shrugged back.

The walk to the kitchen was portentous and the air broiled with an unspoken tension. With one last turn and a step through revolving doors, Angora reached a warm stove and motioned for us to flank her.

A bubbling pot simmered on the stove top and I spied an arrangement of various produce nearby on a wooden cutting board. As Lady Angora took inventory, I peered around the kitchen.

It was a little unnerving. I've never been in the kitchen with so little noise and movement; it was usually full and bustling with chefs and maids and perfumed with the delicious scents of a cooking meal, but I'm sure she purposefully had the area cleared for our lesson.

Peach carefully studied the ingredients and cookware before smiling. The new light in her eyes came from understanding, "We're making tea, aren't we?"

"Correct Miss Toadstool, we are indeed making tea," Lady Angora's voice was gravelly, "What I am going to teach you is a royal Sarasalandian female heirloom. It is a recipe that has been within your royal line since its very genesis."

"What's the name of the tea?" Peach asked.

Lady Angora's expression was far more dour than usual, lips thin and pressed into a tight line as she began to rapidly slice some of the leafy plants, "While I am happy that you two are enjoying each other's company and have managed to find a sliver of happiness in dark times, beware that Sarasaland is still in peril."

"Lady Angora...what _is_ this about?" I asked, trying to understand the motivation behind this.

"This tea is called unamor. Which as you should know roughly translates to "loveless"." Angora finished chopping the unknown greens before moving onto a bundle of angiosperms and made quick work of them. She cut off their bright buds and collected a viscous, milky white fluid from their shoots.

"It is no secret that once upon a time, your female ancestors could not choose who they wed. In fact, a good number of your ancestors were wed to awful, abusive monsters. They were married to cruel, heartless men who only saw them good for producing children. This tea is simple enough; one teaspoon of these plants for every six ounces of water and then steep for five minutes."

After she finished dicing the last of the plants, she dumped the contents into a cup and began to steep the tea. The air plumed with a sour, unpleasant odor that was reminiscent of curdled milk. Peach and I coughed, covering our noses and trying our best not to gag.

But even with the awful, pungent scent souring the air, Lady Angora was still furiously concentrating all her efforts and energies on the tea.

She was glaring, watching the tea slowly infuse, "This tea for a long, long time was the only way a woman could defend herself from such cruelty. It was the only way your ancestors could prevent fertility. In turn, once a king thought of his bride as infertile, he discarded her, moved on and remarried."

Angora sighed deeply, suddenly looking tired. As if sharing such knowledge drained her strength, "Hear me ladies. Take this lesson as a warning. Have your fun, be light-hearted and merry with one another, but never forget that war is lingering. And with war comes a multitude of terrible, horrendous things. I certainly hope there is never a day you two will use this tea, but everything is changing. Kingdoms who we once thought of as allies are now our worst enemies and kingdoms we once never knew are now allies. Things are not the same as they once were."

She was clearly speaking of the Aqualands. Perhaps they were never our closest compatriots but never would we have expected them to turn into vicious enemies. And the Darklands prior to all of this had never cared about Sarasaland and now they had a direct hand in establishing new irrigation systems, opening new shops and businesses within both kingdom borders.

If Taurus' kingdom could suddenly flip and become our enemies, could the same happen with the Darklands? Could Bowser suddenly lose all interest with Sarasaland, sever our friendship and wish to take us to war?

No, it couldn't happen; though he was thought of as cruel and evil, he wasn't. Perhaps he had been once upon a time, but he had reformed in many ways. With the most obvious involving the new ceasefire between the Darklands and the Mushroom kingdom.

Once the tea finished steeping and cooled to an acceptable level, Lady Angora silently poured the two of us a warm, steaming cup full of unamor that smelt like a foot. I stared into the unappetizing brown brew that was runny and clumpy and reminded me far too much of mud.

"Many of your ancestors had to drink this, many of them were little more than slaves, prisoners," Angora whispered, "Learn from their struggles. I realize this drink is sordid in taste but if they could drink entire kettles, I think you can finish one measly cup."

Peach and I both took a sip and I nearly spat the drink back up. Peach had far more decorum and managed to swallow it down, though her face became awfully pale. I pinched my nose, titled my head back and forced down the drink in unappetizing gulps.

Angora smiled wanly, "Think of this tea as a last resort. If all fails, there is one way you can save yourself. It's not much at all, but it's better than nothing."

When people thought of royalty, they thought of the good. They saw the glittering crowns, the large castles, the multitude of servants and power; they automatically thought of the opulence and wealth. What most people without noble blood didn't know was that there was an unspoken darkness, a bloodied history behind the crown.

Our history was filled with betrayal, bloodlust, war, famine, lust, death; as were the histories of so many other royal families.

Our ancestors killed thousands of innocents to either protect or enhance their empire; they have deceived, lied, betrayed and even taken women all for the sake of the crown. It was no secret how royal women were bartered like mares at bazaars, used to acquire peace treaties and even accumulate more wealth.

Finding true love was rare for royals, even I was arranged in a political marriage where my councilors carefully weighed the pro and cons of my suitors. The only reason I hadn't been _sold _to an awful, selfish royal was because Father protected me.

I knew plenty of royal women—girls more like it—who were barely in their early teens and had been forced to marry corpulent, balding men who were twice their age and slovenly. Their fathers had greedily exchanged their daughters like common commerce; trading them in exchange for coin and land.

Love amongst royals was rare. I knew Father found true love because he had fought against tradition. He had terminated his arranged marriage and instead choose to marry Mother; he had to go through hell and high water to do so, but he made it happen.

Lady Angora watched us both before fixing herself a cup of the pungent tea and drank it, wincing at its dreadful taste, "Stars I forget how terrible this tea is."

I blinked, "You've drank this tea before?"

"Of course. Every now and then I've got to see if I'm making the recipe correctly."

My inquiry came out before I could stop it, "Did you _need _to use this tea?"

"Fortunately no," Angora smiled dryly, "I've been one of the lucky ones. Emperor Sakuro may come off as cold and hardhearted but he takes very good care of his people. Especially his court ladies."

"Uncle may seem apathetic but he is only that way because he has to be," Peach spoke with a soft smile, "Everyone who works with him, for him knows this."

"Ladies, do not let this lesson upset your mood," Angora spoke, "This is simply to remind you of what is going on around you. You two are now of proper age to know how to make this tea, you two are old enough to protect yourselves with this. But do not let this lesson dampen your day. Unlike your ancestors you _can_ have fun. So please, make merry at your tea party."

I frowned, "You don't think that Bowser...?"

I was surprised when Lady Angora arched a playful eyebrow and grinned, "That you will need this tea for _him_? _Hardly. _Though he struggles to keep his hands off of _you_, I'm sure you can convince him to marry you before engaging in those type of activities. He's surprisingly respectable. This tea is not designed for a man like him."

I replayed Angora's words in my head until it all clicked into place. Angora smirked as my face burned a deep, dark red. My jaw dropped as Peach's tinkling laughter flooded the room, "_T-That was not what I meant_!"

Peach continued to laugh as I shot a dark glare her way. Lady Angora's amused smile made her eyes seem brighter, "It was all said in jest, Princess."

The three of us finished the last of the acrid tea in silence. The air seemed lighter, far more contented than what it was just a few moments ago. Angora was right, I was going to go out today and enjoy the tea party.

I'd be amongst my closest friends and would share a fun day under the pretty blue sky. I'll still complain about Peach using me as her life-sized mannequin, but I was determined to enjoy today.

* * *

><p>The prestigious Darklandian Royal Preparatory Academy hosted a brief summer program for kindergartners that would provide stimulation and a vigorous academic challenge.<p>

Their students were the wealthiest and the brightest of the Darklandian kingdom, the sons and daughters of councilors, judges, doctors, and kings.

Today's classroom assignment was to illustrate their families. The instructor continued to circle around the class, happily watching her students hard at work.

This was the elevated standard received from the brightest and wealthiest of the Darklands; hardworking, focused students. She expected nothing less from the Darkland's elite.

She went to take a long draw from her mug and found it empty. If she was going to deal with hyper Koopaling kindergartners, she was going to _need _coffee.

She peered at her students once more before heading out of the classroom; the breakroom was nearby and she wouldn't be o gone for longer than a minute.

Junior hummed happily, carefully drawing strokes and squiggles for his mama's red, curly hair. As Junior worked hard on coloring within the lines, his nearest neighbor happened to glance at his picture then did a double take.

"_Hey_," the nosey Koopaling butted in. His bushy brows furrowed together as he jabbed a chubby claw at Junior's paper, "Your drawing is wrong."

Junior frowned, "Nuh uh, there's nothing wrong with my drawing. It's _my_ drawing. Worry about your own work."

And to make matters worse, the nosey Koopaling named Coal turned around and loudly declared to his classmates, "Hey! Junior has a _human girl _in his picture!"

Immediately a cluster of Koopaling kinders dropped what they were doing and huddled tightly around Junior's desk to look at his picture. Some of the kinders pushed and shoved to land themselves better, closer positions.

"Wow! A human!" A Koopette with a large pink bow squealed happily, "Is she pretty?"

"Do you _really _know a human, Junior?" A Koopaling boy with a red hat called out, "I hear humans have skin! Is her skin soft? Mushy? Dry?"

"I wanna meet one!" Another eager classmate chirped.

"My daddy says they smell weird!"

"My mommy says they're oily!"

"Who is that lady in your picture, Junior? Why did you draw her?"

As the curious kinders hovered closer to get the best view possible, Junior took the opportunity to proudly declare, "She's my mama! She's pretty and nice and she smells like strawberries."

As the kindergarteners whispered excitedly about Junior's human mama, Coal shook his head, "_Nuh-uh_! That's not right! You can't have a human girl as a mom. That's not possible! Koopas and Koopettes can only make Koopalings."

"Shut up! She's my mama no matter what you say!" Junior defended angrily.

"No she's not!"

"She _is_!"

"She's _not_!"

"She is _too_!"

Seeing that Junior wouldn't deny the human girl, Coal tried a new tactic. He laughed and spoke loudly so everyone would look at him, "Well humans are ugly and your mom is ugly too!"

A few of the students laughed as Junior's face grew red with anger, "Oh _yeah_? Well you're ugly! Your face looks like your butt!"

A louder, more childish array of giggles dispersed through the class. The bushy-browed Koopaling fumed, grinding his teeth as Junior made sure to smirk in the same way his dad did when he said something clever.

"Oh _yeah?_" Coal huffed angrily, quickly growing short of breath, "Well...Well...y-your mom is a stupid, stinky _feosaura_! _So there!_"

A collective low murmur of 'oohs' floated around the circle of students. Some kindergarteners looked sad but most were worried; they knew they weren't supposed to say the 'f' word because it was a bad word.

Coal grinned widely at the mixture of surprise and hurt on Junior's face. In fact, he really liked the attention he was getting. Everyone was finally watching him, making him the star and not Junior.

He never really liked Junior anyways because he was a prince and thought he was _so_ cool. The attention from everyone bloated Coal's ego like a balloon.

And since he was suddenly emboldened by the spotlight, Coal snatched Junior's drawing and purposefully took his claw and slashed across the human girl's face until the paper ripped. The entire class gasped, stunned at the hurtful action.

_"My picture_!" Junior cried, devastated.

"Coal said a naughty word," a Koopaling girl whispered.

"We're not supposed to say that word," Another Koopaling boy murmured.

"You ruined his picture! That's not nice!"

"It _is_ weird Junior drew a human in his picture…"

"My daddy says humans are all stupid."

Junior bit his lip to avoid crying like a big baby. He blinked back tears and sniffled as he stared at his ruined picture. He had tried so hard to color within the lines and make it look super nice for his mama.

The longer he poured over his ruined picture, the more sad and the more upset he became. His sadness quickly twisted into a rising anger. He clenched his fists and with little thought, turned around, reeled back and threw a punch his father would have been proud of.

Junior's fist crunched painfully against Coal's snout as a glorious red explosion flew from his nostrils. Coal screamed, toppling over backwards as he cradled his newly busted snout.

The students watched as he bawled like a baby, sniffing back a disgusting mixture of snot and blood. But Junior's hurt was not sated quite yet; he had to pay for both ruining his picture and for saying those mean things about his mama. The crown prince straddled him, incisors bared as he continued hammering away at Coal's face.

Junior's sudden bloodlust stirred the class. They screamed and chanted, happily egging the fight on as they cheered and taunted Coal.

"Stop! _You're hurting me_!" Coal wailed.

"_Yeah?_" Junior snarled, "_That's_ what you _get_ for calling my mama a mean name!"

Coal tried to push Junior off and they rolled into a knot of frantic, tangled limbs. The kindergarten instructor returned, holding a mug of fresh coffee in hand. She had left the classroom for just a split second and was sure her students were hard at work—

_"Fight! Fight! Fight!"_

"_What!?"_ She cried. She rushed around the crowd of Koopalings and gaped at the fists and kicks being exchanged between two of her students.

"_Oh my Stars!_ Stop it! Stop it boys at once!" She quickly rushed towards the fighting Koopalings, pulling them both apart. Smoke rose from her nostrils as her eyes narrowed, "_Bowser Junior_ and _Coalton the third_! Both of your fathers will hear of this _at once_!"

"_No!"_ Junior hung limply within his teacher's arms as he cried, "_Please_ don't call King Dad! He has to stay with Mama in the desert until he marries her! If he has to get me from school, then he'll hafta leave Mama!"

"Your Mama is a stupid _feosaura_ _bitch_!" Coal growled through bloody teeth, "I hope the Aqua prince marries her!"

And just when the fight seemed over, both boys were at each other's throats, clawing, kicking, punching and cursing.

* * *

><p>Clawdus Koopa exited a private meeting chamber with three of his subordinate Firelands elders tailing him. The summer morning was already unfolding into a gloriously beautiful day with sweet balmy winds and clear skies.<p>

The king's stone castle was pleasantly warm from the kiss of sunlight and natural insulation from the surrounding stone walls. Servants pried open doors and windows, letting fresh air circumvent the palace. But even amidst the picturesque weather and pleasant castle atmosphere, the Firelands councilors silently fumed.

They were all frustrated to varying degrees, having accomplished absolutely nothing without the Darklandian king's approval. Without the king's stamp of approval on documents, treaties and even scheduled meetings, busy itineraries and business transactions came to a staggering halt.

Any and everything pertaining to government business was iced until the king's return. And don't think the Firelands' councilors didn't exhaust all other possible avenues. Trying to pressure the king's advisors with innumerous bribes and threats was ineffective; the two sycophantic lapdogs remained stubbornly unmoved.

Then they tried to go through King Boo, a long time ally and a dear friend of the King since Koopalinghood. Now _that _was a mistake. The ghost king only spoke in nonsensical riddles and led them on irritating wild goose chases. And it was obvious that King Boo had _enjoyed_ doing it.

So here they stood, peering over one of the castle's many courtyards, trying to think of something, anything to resume business. These few days of inaction were beginning to hurt their purses.

"What are we to do about this?" One of the lower ranking officials growled irritably, incisors bared, "Every new operation my coal mines implement must be documented and the paperwork must be approved by the king himself. Yet he's not here to do it and he absolutely refuses to return to the palace."

A second Firelands' elder threw up his arms in resignation, "Our hands are tied. We've tried everything; we've tried to speak with his two advisors, we've tried to make him leave Sarasaland and yet he refuses. He wishes to stay as long as he can for _obvious_ reasons."

_For the Desert princess_. A rather plain, unexceptional human if they'd ever seen one. Clawdus clicked his tongue at the thought of his former son-in-law preferring that dull girl over his beauteous daughter. But Bowser's Star awful taste in women was neither here nor there.

This was business. Clawdus remained silent, musing over their words and the situation at hand. Their businesses and investments were beginning to suffer and soon to follow would be a loss of revenue.

Clawdus' gaze narrowed against the bright white sun, "Our opportunity will present itself. And when it does, we must seize it ruthlessly."

The governor peered at the blazing skyline, stroking his chin in deliberation; they'd have to force the king to leave, kicking and screaming it seemed.

Bowser may have been an intolerable, self-important ass, but when it came to running a kingdom, even Governor Clawdus was hard-pressed to admit he was damn good at it. His personal blend of acuity and ruthlessness was enough to ward off even the most driven councilor.

And unfortunately appointing his two advisor lapdogs to run the kingdom in his absence was another damn good move on his part; they were proficient at the task and loyal to a fault. So really, since Kamek and Kamelia were efficiently handling kingdom business, there was no need for the king to rush back.

But then again...Bowser was not only a king but a father as well. Perhaps they could exploit that to their benefit but how? Clawdus mused longer on the thought. He wouldn't intentionally endanger the children, they _were_ still his grandchildren.

Though he clearly had his favorites and had no problem letting them know so; as the heir to the throne, Junior was obviously the apple of his eye. When Junior's birthday arrived, he received big gifts from his grandfather and a rare smile or two.

Next was a tie between Wendy and Ludwig, both of whom looked very much like their mother. Wendy was Clawdia's spitting image and Ludwig had Clawdia's pretty blue eyes and calm, placid mannerisms. _Everyone_ knew Ludwig was more Clawdia's kid than Bowser's.

The rest of the grandchildren were immaterial; Junior was the most doted upon followed by Wendy and Ludwig. The other grandchildren weren't notable. They were either pathetic, or not nearly close enough in line to rule.

The other three councilors began a quiet conversation between themselves, discussing ideas. The governor's cell rang and he quickly took a few steps away from his subordinates to take the call privately.

"It's the governor."

_"Hello Governor Blackthorne, how are you this morning?"_

"Very good. May I ask who's calling?"

_"This is Principal Firea Shellhorn of the Darklandian Royal Predatory Academy. Sorry to take up your precious time but there's been an incident involving your grandson."_

Clawdus snorted dismally, "_Roy?_ Little pigheaded punk. That child is absolutely infur—"

"_It's concerning Bowser Junior, Sire. Roy has long since graduated from the Academy," _then the principal silently muttered, _"Thank the Stars that one is gone—_Ahem_. I realize the king is out of town for kingdom related business, but we will need to see another one of the prince's legal guardians and besides the two advisors, you are the only blood relative listed in his emergency contacts."_

Clawdus suddenly grinned wickedly, "I'm afraid I cannot help. I will have to let the king know he is needed back within the Darklands _immediately_. Though I am Bowser Junior's grandfather, his father would be utterly uncomfortable if I stepped in. I will have the king back within the kingdom soon."

_"Really Sire, it is no problem. We can schedule the parent conference for a later week to accommodate the king's hectic schedule—"_

"That's not necessary. Set a date soon, and the king will be present. Besides, what is more important than our _Koopalings_?" Clawdus was nearly laughing by this point, "The King prides himself on being a very good, involved father. He'd be _happy_ to drop all business and see to his child."

_"...Very well then. Thank you Governor. I will arrange the meeting for tomorrow evening."_

"Thank you," and with that both parties hung up. Having heard Clawdus' end of the conversation, the Firelands councilors were instantly upon him, "Governor...does this mean what I think it does...?"

"Indeed," Clawdus growled victoriously, smiling, "It means the King will be home as soon as tomorrow. Well, I think we ought to inform the king's lapdogs, don't you?"

* * *

><p>Kammy Koopa was poised in her office, tackling the King's administrative paperwork with a fierce tenacity. Kamek had been happy to oversee the king's tasks involving the castle subordinates, which was just fine with Kamelia. She preferred working with cold facts and crunching numbers anyways. People just added unnecessary complications.<p>

She took her time, digesting a rather drab, condensed acquisition from the governor of the Coallands borough. Though wordy and packed with useless, confusing drivel; Kammy smirked. This was nothing but piranha crap wrapped in fancy words. She'd let the king know once he returned back home.

With a thoughtless flick of her wand, a quill materialized from thin air and began to scribe a note for King Bowser. As Kammy began to shuffle through more dense paperwork, there was a knock on her double doors. Without looking up, she called out, "Let yourself in."

The doors creaked open and the figure who darkened her doors made her pause. Governor Clawdus stood, grinning with his usual smug countenance, "Good morning, Miss Kamelia."

Kammy's expression didn't falter in the least, "Good morning Governor. You've stopped by to speak business I presume? Let's keep things brief. I've got much work to look over with His Eminence away."

"Of course," Clawdus took a step further into the office. He allowed his eyes to travel over the bland office decor. Plain cream walls, no personal items such as pictures. The only records kept were of her achievements like diplomas; Kamelia Koopa had never been feminine, always business first.

Kammy peered at him, intentionally keeping her stare unnerving, intense, "Yes, Governor?"

"Kamelia Koopa, you're a smart Koopette," Clawdus began lightly, "So I'm going to give you a choice here."

"Governor," Kamelia's voice quickly lost its artificial civility, "We've already played this game before and I grow tired of it. No matter how you and the councilors scheme, the King isn't going to bend to your whim."

"The first option," Clawdus continued as if he hadn't been interrupted, "Is for you to inform His Highness that he will be returning home by tomorrow."

Kammy allowed the lightest of smirks to appear on her lips, "And the second? I hope it's _far_ more exciting."

Clawdus took several steps closer until Kammy had to crane her neck to meet his stare. Clawdus spoke in a softer voice, "The second option, my dear Koopette, would be that I tell King Bowser that his heir to the throne is a royal screw up. That his son has ruined his so-called _playtime_ with his tacky Desert princess. I'd also happily inform the king that his son is a delinquent and is failing school."

Kammy's expression hardened, "Are these the lows you must travel? Bashing a kindergartener to further your selfish agenda?"

Clawdus laughed, "Don't believe me? Call the boy's school. See for yourself that he has a meeting with the principal tomorrow for appalling behavior."

"That I _will_." Kammy had the school's number on speed dial—thanks to Roy's frequent delinquent behavior when he had attended the academy. There were four rings before it was answered, "Yes, Hello Principal Shellhorn, how are you today? That's good to hear. This is Kamelia Koopa, King Bowser's advisor. I am well too. I would like to validate an issue pertaining to Bowser Junior?"

Kammy remained silent, listening to the other party speak. Though her face didn't give anything away, her free hand curled tightly into a ball, "Is that so?"

There was more silence as Kammy continued to listen to the principal, "Very well then. Thank you for taking time out of your schedule and explaining that. Thank you. Have a good day."

Kammy hung up the phone and finally peered back at Clawdus, whose expression was still insufferably smug. She spoke in the coolest of voices, "I will inform the king myself. You may leave my office now."

Clawdus laughed, heading towards the exit, "Have a good day, _Kamelia._ And it's nice to finally have the King back, isn't _it_?"

The governor closed the door behind himself with a merry disposition. Kammy frowned; so, the Firelands' plotting wouldn't be the obstacle that finally brought the king back, it would be his son.

Still, that would _not_ make Bowser happy, but receiving the message in a taunting, awful jeer from Clawdus Koopa would push him over the edge.

Push him over the edge was an _understatement; _Bowser's terrible ire would erupt and he would marvelously blow everyone halfway to hell. Though it wouldn't be easy to deal with an irate king, Kammy knew it was the best for them all. If someone ought to break the news to the irascible king, it ought to be her.

Kammy sighed in a mixture of irritation and fatigue, rubbing at her aching eyes behind her spectacles, "I'm definitely not paid enough for _this_..."

She pressed the intercom's shiny speech button and ordered, "Find Kamek and send him to my office. _Now_."

It wasn't long when Kamek floated in. Even before he stepped into her line of sight, Kammy could hear him singing like a merry fool.

She scowled, growling in the back of her throat; this was _not_ the time to be happy like a mindless idiot. Their king was going to flip his lid when he found out he had to leave Sarasaland.

Kamek occupied the seat in front of her cherry wood desk, spinning around childishly, "Hi Kam-Kam! What can I do for you?"

"Don't call me that stupid name," Kammy hissed, "It's bad enough His Highness calls me _Kammy. _Anyways, I just found out some terrible news."

Kamek began to laugh, "So you've _finally_ found out this whole time, you're really a _man_, huh? I've _told_ you that for years! The signs were quite obviou—"

Kammy didn't waste a second when she brought her wand down against Kamek's cranium in a painful wallop. Kamek clutched his smarting head, "_OWW!_ _Oh Stars! You evil, crazy old hag bag_!"

"That's what you get," Kammy sneered with dark glee, "Now are you going to listen to why I called you here?"

"_Oooh_...You probably destroyed half of my brain with that shot!" Kamek whimpered, rubbing his smarting skull.

"It's been _long _gone before then," Kammy smirked, "Now listen. I was just informed there was an incidence at Prince Bowser Junior's school. As I am not the child's parent, I cannot learn what has really occurred, but it is serious. Serious enough that a meeting with the principal is inevitable and that...Lord Bowser must return to the Darklands."

Kamek suddenly fell silent, "...How _soon_ must he return here?"

Kammy nervously twisted her wand within her fingers, "By _tomorrow._"

"And let me guess," Kamek spoke in an unusually calm voice, "_We _have to inform him of this, don't we?"

"...Yes."

Everything that happened next was as fast as a blur. Kamek shot up out of his seat and tried to escape on his broom, but Kammy knew he'd try such a stunt.

She sprang into the air with incredible reflex and grabbed Kamek off his broom, knocking them both to the floor. They both wrestled and fought, rolling and grunting.

"_Let me go_!" Kamek whined, still frantically crawling towards the exit, "I want to live another hundred years!"

Kammy hissed with strain, holding him in a half nelson, "No! We...are going to do this! Buck up you cowardly old _croak_!"

"He's going to kill us this time! _For real_!" Kamek wailed.

"_Koopa up, Kamek_!"

Kamek released a rather feminine squeal, "_Not if it keeps me alive!"_

As both Koopas continued to struggle, Kamek was nearly at the doorframe as Kammy managed to lock him in a death grip. They both paused when they heard loud, boisterous laughter.

They both peered up, realizing Roy Koopa was standing near the door, laughing his ass off. Kammy's face flushed deep red as she realized just how compromising their positions were.

"_Daaaaamn_!" Roy crowed loudly, bellowing with laughter, "Tha old folks are straight doin' tha _nasty_ right on the _floor_!"

* * *

><p>Bowser paced the length of his room unhappily. He didn't want to talk to anyone and all he wanted to do was wallow in his own guest suite the whole damn day. He had a Sarasalandian maid deliver Kooples to Grammy, who had been more than happy to watch over the cute Koopaling.<p>

Just knowing Mario was _only _one door down made him want to renege on his promise to the emperor and beat the crap out of that red midget.

Each time Bowser reminisced about last night, a violent, sweltering blend of self-loathing and fury rose within him like bile. One moment they were the toughest of foes, and then the next, Mario was a sympathizer. All those years of earning respect through spilt blood, bruises and broken bones was now all for nothing.

Mario knew far too much about his inner most feelings and if he wanted, the plumber plebeian could exploit him effortlessly. Mario could run over to Flower and tell her exactly how he felt, he could spread such precious information to the Darklands' worst political enemies and the world could have a long, good laugh at his expense.

Stars how was he supposed to face Mario now? Should he pretend it never happened? Or should he flat out threaten Mario's life and tell him that if he told anyone about yesterday night he would torch his balls off.

Bowser actually laughed at that one, before quickly remembering his predicament and grew sullen once more. He continued engraving tracks into the carpet, following the same pattern he had already walked.

There was a knock at the door. Bowser growled thickly, mane rising on end, "If you're a short, fat idiot plumber then your ass better think twice. Leave now and I'll let you live."

"Uh..." the young voice behind the door sounded more confused than scared, "And if I'm not him...?"

Bowser snorted a cloud of dark smoke before stomping over and nearly pulling the door off its hinges. Staring back at him was that puny Toadstool servant. The one with the really squeaky voice and drooled stupidly over Peach. The king arched a brow, "The hell do you want short stack? Can't you _see_ that I'm in deep contemplation here? I'm _actively _contemplating shit."

"Firstly, I'd l-like to say that uh...y-you look great today!" The Toad blubbered, smiling nervously as sweat lined his brow, "And uh...next t-this is an invitation from the beauteous Princess Peach...and she wants me back alive so no killing me, _please_?"

Bowser snatched the invitation, quickly glossing over the words. It was pink, pretty and written in Princess Toadstool's very own beautiful cursive.

The invite spoke of a tea party at three p.m. And it slyly mentioned how Flower would be there and dressed nicely. Bowser smirked; Peach was _good,_ she knew _exactly_ what bait to use to catch a studly Koopa king. With a genial chuckle, Bowser replied, "Tell them I'll be there."

"Oh and one last thing," the Toad looked irritated, "That blowhard Mario is going to be there too. Think you can, like, chop him in the throat or something?"

Bowser hid his amusement behind a relatively straight face; _chop Mario in the throat huh_? A little amateurish and too damn obvious but he liked how this puny kid thought. The King raised an eyebrow, "Weren't you there when I promised the emperor I wouldn't fight with him anymore?"

The Toad sighed, looking disappointed, "Well..._Yeah_..."

"Well, I'll see what I can do," The King peered at the ceiling, rubbing his chin with deep thought, "Circumstances aren't all that forgiving and the Emp is clearly watching what I do. Maybe I can manage to 'accidentally' trip him or something. I mean, who the hell am I to refute a child's dream," Bowser called himself patting the Toadstool's head kindly, but in actuality he was slapping the boy's head so hard he might as well have been dribbling a basketball.

The painful petting had Alabaster balking loudly, wildly flapping his arms like a chicken, "_Gah!_ H-Hey! _Stop_! You're gonna give me a _mild concussion_! If there are such things!"

Bowser, still in a rare good mood, grinned down at the Toadstool. Though his smile was once again supposed to be genial, the large, sharp incisors only made his smile appear cruel, "And now, you can get the hell out."

"W-What?"

"I was planning on punting you like a football, but I'm suddenly in a charitable mood," The King's 'kind' smile only grew sharper, "Now scram."

"Well, I don't need to hear much more than that. _Peace!"_ And with that, the little servant jetted out of there, tripping and stumbling several times along the way.

Bowser chuckled, lightly closing the door behind himself. Once he was sure all possible prying eyes and ears were gone, he grinned widely at the invitation in hand, wondering just how much time he could squeeze into making Flower blush. Maybe play some footsie under the table, or "accidentally" keep touching her hand.

As he continued pondering the many delightful ways to fluster the Desert princess, his cell phone glowed as it suddenly came to life, singing a tune. Bowser picked up the phone, smirking, "Kammy, what's u—"

_"H-Heya Bowser!"_ Kamek jumped in nervously.

Bowser smirked, "Old goat! How's the keep doin'?"

_"W-Wonderful Sire! Oh great king! Oh handsome...king of all that is manly and buff_," Kamek laughed nervously.

"My ears are burning," Bowser purred playfully, "Now really. I'll accept kiss-assery, but what's going on? You guys didn't just call to tell me how masculine I am...but maybe it's something I _should_ implement..."

"_Bowser..."_ Kammy finally spoke up and her tone sounded serious, "_I have some awful news to report_."

Bowser perked up; for one thing, Kammy never called him by name, it was always His Nastiness this or Lord Bowser that, "...Yeah, Hag?"

"_Bowser...you've got to come home..."_ Kammy replied softly, "_By tomorrow."_

Bowser actually laughed, "You're kidding right?"

"..."

The King stopped grinning, "...You're _not_ kidding."

_"No Sire. You've got to leave tomorrow at dawn. We've already arranged for you—"_

Bowser froze, his jaw dropping before his temper conflagrated violently, "**WHAT!?"**

"_Bowser! Now...let's be calm,_" Kamek tried, but Bowser wasn't having it.

"_Kamelia Koopa_," Bowser growled from behind gritted incisors; he didn't know if his eyes were closed, or if he was just too heated to see straight but everything in his line of vision seemed blurry and dark, "I'm going to _need_ you to tell me _why_ I've got to leave and make sure you use as few words as possible. My patience is really _thin_. Talk. Now."

"_Sire_," again Kammy released a shaky breath, "_It was brought to my attention that Bowser Junior had an altercation at his school today and you're needed to attend the parent-teacher conference_."

"_Don't kill us!"_ Kamek added as an afterthought, "_We like breathing_!"

Bowser fell silent; truthfully that wasn't what he had expected to hear at all. He figured the Firelands council had done some sort of nefarious, underhanded bullshit tactic to cause his retreat; he certainly didn't expect something as menial as a parent-teacher conference.

"_Apologies Sire, but it looks like it's time to go_," Kammy's quiet voice was far more sympathetic than fearful, "_I'll have our finest brigade sent to pick you up at dawn."_

"So this is it huh?" Bowser's voice was even softer than her own, "I had planned on staying here another week or two but..."

Kammy's voice was softer than a dove's breast, "_Just enjoy your final day in Sarasaland. Your Koopalings will be thrilled to see you. Thrilled to see you're in far better health than you lead on_."

Bowser laughed quietly, "Yeah, I did stretch the truth a little bit, eh? Well, if today's my last day here...I better say a proper goodbye to Flower."

"_Please do, Sire. And enjoy your final day. Once again, sorry for such an abrupt exodus. We certainly did our best to 'buy' some more time_."

"Alright. See you soon. Oh, Kammy?"

_"Yes, Lord Bowser?"_

"Do you know what Junior did at school?"

_"Not a clue Sire. All I know is that it was delinquent behavior. The school insists on keeping the matter between the children's parents."_

"Alright. See you soon."

_"Bye, My King."_

_"Bye Bowser..."_

* * *

><p>Bowser tromped towards the Emperor's study, still fuming over the shocking revelation that he was to depart Sarasaland so soon. But it was legit; he had to leave to take care of his son, his youngest son whom he learned had done something really serious. And whatever it was, it involved another student, so it had to have been some kind of a fight.<p>

He had been shocked honestly; Junior was mischievous and pulled pranks every now and then and graffitied misspelled words, but fighting, aiming to really, truly harm someone wasn't in his nature.

If Junior felt the urge to fight someone, something serious must have went down. And this scuffle was even more surprising because to the King's knowledge, Junior was a very well-liked student amongst his peers.

The Koopalings his age admired and liked him for being bubbly, friendly and silly whereas the older students left him alone because, one, he was the _rich _heir to the Darklandian throne and two, they all knew _Roy_ was his brother. And messing with Junior meant you would soon be visited by a pissed-off Roy and his massive fists.

Bowser took another left around the end of a long hallway as the towering door to the Emperor's study loomed before him. As he reached the door, a councilman in white robes stepped in his pathway.

Though old and grayed with age, the Councilman's dark eyes were strident, alert. He nodded curtly, "Councilman Salini. High protectorate of Sarasaland."

Bowser mimicked his curt nod and clipped tone, "King Bowser. Head and ruling lord of the Darklands empire."

Then there was a lull of silence; neither person made a move to step out of the other's path and for a moment they stared each other down. The head councilman continued to observe Bowser with a rather disinterested, pompous stare. An unimpressed stare that alleged he had seen bigger and badder and found Bowser wanting.

The King arched an eyebrow, wondering what the old Kroger was trying to prove by intentionally blocking his path. Was this some sort of showdown? Was this councilman trying to prove he wasn't afraid of the big, bad King Bowser?

After another drawn-out deadlock, the councilman finally blinked, "I couldn't help but notice you're headed towards our Emperor's study. State your business, King."

A prickle of ire made his claws flex and slowly wind into tightly clenched fists. Bowser kept an emotionless, uncompromising visage, "_Who_ are you again? Last I checked, Kings were only to speak with those they were on par with."

Salini's eyes thinned, "I am His Majesty's right hand. As you are aware, Sarasaland is embroiled in terrible political strife. We are simply being cautious as to who can access our Emperor. And by the way…" Salini took a meaningful step towards Bowser, "_the High protectorate_ holds _more_ than enough power to screen who does and does not see the emperor, regardless of whether the visitor _is_ a ruling lord of an empire or not."

Bowser grinned ruthlessly; it was a match of political wits and cunning was it? Did he _know_ who he was dealing with here? If it were appropriate to do so, Bowser would have laughed his ass off.

What, did the High Protectorate think he didn't have a set of his own haughty, self-important councilman as well? _Well_, Councilman Salini may have earned a _fleck _of his respect by trying to stand up to him, but that's just where this stupid little game all ended.

The Firelands' councilKoopas made this look like a joke. They were ten times meaner, ten stops more cutthroat, more selfish and their threats held actual gravity behind them.

One way or another, the Firelands' Council would find a way to screw you over and most of the time, no one saw it coming. The merciless combination of affluence and cruelty the Firelands councilKoopas employed would put him to _shame_.

Bowser didn't like _anything_ about them, but they sure as hell had his respect. But _this?_ This little, _so called_ confrontation was fricking _laughable_.

This was child's play. After Bowser dealt with him, he ought to send Councilman Salini to be schooled by his Firelands councilors. Let him learn what _real _cutthroat politics looked like.

"Look, _Councilman_," Bowser spoke in a smooth, cold voice that belayed his rising giddiness; he was about to _get _this bastard, "In light of what's been going on with the Aqualands, I can understand why you safeguard your Emperor so carefully."

"_But_," Bowser paused just to add to the performance, "_here's_ what's going to happen now. You're _going_ to let me see the Emperor. You're _going_ to step aside and you're _going_ to get out of my way."

"If you think you can ramrod your way into—"

"Let's play this the _fun_ way. But just remember, you _asked _ for this," Bowser cracked a grin, "You get the hell out of my way or else."

Salini's eyes thinned, "Your arrogant, self important hauteur won't work—"

"You Desert people sent your Emperor off to his own demise, to go into the Aqualands_ completely unarmed_. Let's not be stupid; _I_ saved him. If it wasn't for _me_ contacting Lady Kitsune of Land's End, your Emperor would be _dead_ and Sarasaland would be _boned_."

Though Salini's expression remained staid, he had no words to exchange. Bowser continued, "Our trades have helped your kingdom flourish. And soon, the Darklands is going to ship _free _water to Sarasaland. So _Councilman_, not _only_ will you get the hell out of my way..."

Bowser began to smile, wide and recklessly enough to have the Councilman question his sanity, "You're obligated to get the hell out of my way and _like it_. Of course, you could be a fool and pretend to have a standoff with me. But continue to do this, continue to play this game and I'll cut those benefits, those treaties so damn fast your head will be spinning. As much as I like having an ally in Sarasaland, I like being respected even more."

Of course he was only bluffing. He wouldn't break any helpful treaties and screw over Flower like that. But the Councilman didn't have to know that.

In fact, as Salini peered at him through a narrowed glare, Bowser was sure he was trying to weigh the validity of his bluff.

"You wouldn't," Salini spoke in a deadpan droll, "Princess Sarasaland is much too valuable to you. Doing such a thing would alienate you from her affections."

Bowser shrugged, "Again. I like Princess Sarasaland, but I value my kingdom's generosity being respected. We're not going to provide for a people, a kingdom whose leaders aren't even considerate enough to _move aside _when someone's trying to pass through. If our roles were reversed, you wouldn't have even had to have asked me."

Salini stared at the King intensely, glowering. He didn't say a word, but after a long while, he took a slight step to the side. Bowser nodded his head, eyes hard, "_Good_. Glad we got _that_ settled. Next time, let's not have this weird political pissing contest. I _always_ _out piss_ my opponents."

And with one last sharp, victorious sneer shot at the old councilor, Bowser headed for the emperor's study. And the second Salini couldn't see his face, Bowser began to silently laugh; _I out piss my opponents!? Stars that's gold. I need to write that down somewhere!_

* * *

><p>The emperor's study was one of the few quiet places the Sarasalandian monarch could tackle mounds of monotonous paperwork. Sakuro had barred himself in the room—away from his crazy little brother who had been hounding him all day.<p>

"So which of Pumpkin Pie's suitors do you like best?"

But Apricotto was far more tenacious than he had estimated. Sakuro peered up from the towering stacks of documents with an irritated glare, "I thought I told you, you'd only get to stay in here if you remained quiet."

"I'll be quiet," Apricotto hummed.

Sakuro returned to his paper work, brow furrowed as he concentrated. Over the past twenty four hours, it seemed like every force in the galaxy was out to get him. Out to get Sarasaland.

He certainly didn't expect tranquility but the media was still roaring and raring to go. The rising discord between Sarasaland and the Aqualands was thriving in the news. Every broadcast station had experts weighing in on the situation and everyone expressing their opinions on a matter they knew so little about.

It hadn't been long before the "sympathetic" phone calls began to pour in. Kingdoms and dukedoms Sarasaland held a neutral relationship with at best shared their _concern_ and_ generously_ offered to help. It never took long to figure out what their real agenda was.

Most kingdoms pretended to lend a helping hand by offering new contracts but with a keen eye, all those presented treaties always benefited the _other _party. Then there were the kingdoms that offered to solve Sarasaland's woes by offering to wed his little _Chisana_.

_"Your princess is twenty-three years old," _the corpulent, wheezy king of the Bacon Kingdom had inserted. He spoke as if he came offering helpful advice but really all he came equipped with was an annoying sense of entitlement, _"By now she should have been married and have a few little ones running around. I hope you don't think I'm too bold when I say your girl is as pretty as a ray of sunshine. If things don't work out with those suitors...I'd be happy to wed_—_I mean take care of your daughter." _

Though Sakuro had visibly cringed at the thought of _Chisana _being anywhere near the gluttonous, gassy ruler of the Bacon Kingdom, Sakuro had kindly refuted his offer in such a way the Bacon King's feelings were spared.

And now that there was a momentarily lapse from outside intrusions, Sakuro decided to get some real work done. Though it was difficult, considering Apricotto occupied his office.

"...You know, the King of the Pork kingdom wasn't so bad," Apricotto thought out loud, "He did offer a lifetime supply of pork if he married Pumpkin Pie..."

Sakuro peered up at Apricotto as if he had grown a second head, "The man is not only married but is a lecherous hound. Speaking of engagements, what of your daughter? What will you do about my niece?"

"What do you mean?"

"What will you do about her eligibility?" Sakuro absently twisted a quill between his fingers, "She is several years older than _Chisana _and as you're aware, she's very beautiful. Suitors must be banging down your door for her hand."

Apricotto sighed, rubbing his chin, "I'm afraid so. As Peachie Pie _is_ my daughter. She has inherited all of her pretty from her too sexy daddy."

Sakuro's eyes narrowed, "_Oh please_..."

"Though," Apricotto hummed, "I'm not so sure what to do myself. I mean, Peach hasn't given me a _single_ indication with who she's interested in at _all! _Isn't there _one _guy out there she likes!?"

Sakuro didn't blink, "Apricotto?"

"Yes?"

"Your sheer stupidity _amazes _me."

"Well, okay then _who_?" Apri huffed, "Since you're being so damn snarky about it."

"A specific plumber who has been rescuing your daughter since she was an infant," Sakuro stated in an unimpressed monotone, "_That's _who."

Apricotto blinked, as if suddenly overcome with awareness, "_No..."_

"Yes. Him," Sakuro smirked, "Does it make sense now? It's quite obvious from the way he stares at her, the way he tries to hold her hand. The way he carries her all the way to her castle."

"How have I been so _blind!?" _Apricotto squeaked, smacking his hand against his forehead, "Does...my Peachie Pie feel the exact same way?"

"I would say so," Sakuro went back to his paperwork, "Talk to him. If you contracted a marriage between the two of them, I don't think either of those children would fight you."

Apricotto remained silent, thinking the idea over before he softly said, "I'll do that...I'll have a talk with the hero of the Mushroom kingdom and set it up."

"Good," Sakuro smirked.

There was a loud, resounding knock—punch—on the door. Sakuro and Apricotto exchanged a questioning gaze before peering back at the door, "Step in, it's open."

They felt the loud, booming steps before they saw King Bowser enter. If Sakuro was surprised by his appearance, it didn't show on his face. Apricotto jumped up happily, "_Bowz my Koopa_! Hey! Well fancy meeting you here!"

Bowser shot Apricotto an annoyed glance, "Yeah. _Sure."_

"So, you gonna take me up on some street ball? That's what kids call basketball, when you play on _the streets_," Apricotto informed as he pretended to shoot a basketball, "_Going for the jay_!"

Sakuro cleared his throat, "King Bowser, what can I do for you?"

Bowser's agitated expression wiped until his features were completely neutral. Neutral for King Bowser being a hard stare. Sakuro was pretty sure the king even squared his shoulders and stood straighter, as if posturing.

"Emperor Sakuro," his voice deepened into a low growl, "I wanted to inform you that I'm going to be departing tomorrow."

"_WHAT!?"_ Apricotto cried, "_Why_!? We've still got so many fun things to do! I've already made reservations to go sandcycling together!"

"I'm a little surprised myself," Sakuro replied.

"Something came up back at home," Bowser informed loosely. He smirked, "Bet you're happy to hear I'll be out of your hair soon enough, huh?"

"Who told you _that_!?" Apricotto cried, "I'm absolutely _crushed_!"

Sakuro rose to his feet and Bowser's subtle reaction wasn't missed; his entire posture tensed and his eyes narrowed a fraction.

The emperor approached until he was a few feet away, peering up at Bowser, "To be quite honest, I'm not all that pleased. Sarasaland appreciates all you've done to aid her. We won't forget it. Stay safe in your travels, King Bowser."

Sakuro gave a bow and was a little surprised when he saw Bowser slowly fold into his own, "...Don't think much of it. We're allies right?"

"Right," Sakuro nodded, "Take care."

Bowser's dark red eyes flickered over his person quickly before he turned and stomped out of the room. Sakuro watched until the last of his tall, muscular figure disappeared from sight. In the next minute, Apricotto was beside his brother, grinning, "What is _with _you guys and all of these _manly stare downs_?"

Sakuro arched a brow, "_He _starts them."

Apricotto pretended to study his nails, "Only because _you_ force him."

"I might need my hearing checked because I thought you said I _force _him."

"You do," Apricotto added noncommittally, "He's only reacting to your aura of death and..._pomposity_."

Sakuro returned to his desk chuckling quietly, " "Aura of death" you say? That's hilarious, considering that I have this so called _aura of death_ when he's the actual threat here. He has me beat by several feet and hundreds of pounds easily."

"I dunno Sak," Apricotto replied, "I mean sure, he can easily kick your puny, pale ass."

Offended, Sakuro glared up at him immediately. Apricotto laughed, holding his hands up in surrender, "Hear me out though. Physically he has all the power in the universe, but really, who has the power in _your _relationship? Bowz is really, really interested in your daughter. He likes her so much he's stopped invading my kingdom, something he's done for _decades. _He's actually being _nice. King Bowser _is being _nice. _If _you_ say she can't marry him, then she _won't. _End of story. And he's _very_ aware of that."

Sakuro pondered that, "_How interesting_...I've never considered that before."

"Of course you haven't," Apricotto laughed, "You have all the brains and smartness in the world and yet there's times when you miss the obvious."

Apricotto headed to the door. Sakuro arched a brow, "And where are you going?"

"To talk to the hero of the Mushroom Kingdom of course," Apricotto grinned, "We've got..._business _to discuss."

He shot his older brother a wink before letting the door shut behind himself.

* * *

><p>"Does it fit or what?"<p>

"Or _what_," I grumbled.

"Quit complaining, I bet you look very cute. Also, did you put on the bra?"

"_I'm not wearing that stupid thing!" _I spat, "What's wrong with what I wear now!?"

"_Sports bras_ are fine for when you're actually _playing _sports. But outside of that, you're going to wear normal, _girly underthings_."

Peach's arm suddenly popped through the sliver of the open door, holding out a modest, lace bra, "Now shut up please and put this on. Thank you!"

I rolled my eyes, snatching the garment from her hands, "Honestly you're such a pain..."

"It's what I live for," And with that, Peach's hand disappeared from sight, closing the door.

I was in my bathroom trying on an outfit Peach picked out for the tea party. It didn't escape me how frilly of an outfit she chose; she was clearly dolling me up for today's outing.

I frowned, thoughtlessly plucking at the lacy hem of my white skirt, wondering how I could go the entire day and not dirty up the pristine outfit. There was a playful wrap on the door, "Open up Daisy, I'm coming in~!"

I pulled the door open otherwise Peach would _force_ her way in. She eyed my outfit from head to toe before beaming happily, "Oh do you look so cute and girly!"

My outfit was very feminine, consisting of a white lacy camisole and a matching skirt. Before I knew what was going on, Peach held the side of my face, tilting my head at the perfect angle to draw on brick-red lipstick.

After dabbing the corners of my lips free of errant cosmetics, she stepped back, admiring her work, "Hmm, you need a little more blush...We'll fix that up for you..."

As Peach hovered over me, making minute adjustments to my makeup, I frowned up at her, "Peach, you and I both know I can't wear skirts."

"You most certainly can," Peach was concentrating so hard on reapplying makeup that she began to stick her tongue out, "Now smack your lips together and smooth out your lipstick. No! Not like that! You look like a Sarasaland camel!"

I tried not to laugh, "Hey, I'm just doing what you said!"

Peach snapped the makeup compact shut with a resounding finality as she moved back to drink in my full image. She smiled contently, happily clasping her hands together, "Don't you look darling! We are going to blow those boys away!"

She stood behind me in the mirror, happily admiring her fine handiwork. Ever the icon of beauty and style, Princess Peach was ready to brave the scorching desert heat with effortless poise.

Peach adorned a sleeveless, lighter version of her dress, her signature golden curls pinned up in an elegant high ponytail. She raised her eyebrows playfully, "Ready to share brunch with the gentlemen?"

"I guess," I mumbled, "But really, do I have to wear a skirt? We know things go wrong for me."

She rolled her eyes with little patience, "You're just being silly. If you can wear floor-length dresses then why are skirts any different?"

"Well for one thing," I began scratching at my thigh, "dresses are much longer and heavier."

"Yes, they are," She didn't waste a second to slap my hand away, "Now cut that out. It's nowhere near appropriate behavior. _Scratching at yourself like a brogg_."

I laughed loudly, "Hey! At least I didn't pull a Wario and publically scratch my as-"

Peach made such a disapproving, maternal glare that I halted midsentence. Still grinning, I raised my hands in surrender; do not upset the pink primadonna, "Right, no swearing. Got it."

"Well _little miss ruffian_, let's be on our way," Peach huffed, lightly pushing me towards the door, "Though MarMar and Bowser have made a truce not to fight, I'm still uneasy about leaving them alone together."

She had a point; leaving MarMar and Bowwy alone was like submerging a shark in bloody water. Spoilers: it's a _terrible_ idea.

It wasn't long before we arrived at the White sand gardens. Mario and Bowser were already present, both legends glaring in opposite directions.

Luigi seemed as if he was stuck uncomfortably in the middle. Mario sat at the lunch table, appearing bored with his face resting in palm. Bowser leaned against the table, arms crossed with his back facing Mario as he scowled into the desert horizon.

Peach raised her hand in one smooth, fluid motion and chirruped, " _Yoohoo~!_ Hello gentlemen! We're here!"

Bowser and Mario's heads snapped in our direction with one simultaneous motion. They all rose to their feet in a show of chivalry and maybe even excitement.

Luigi smiled, waving, "Hello ladies!"

"Hi Luigi!" I chirruped, happily waving back.

Mario smiled, eyes brightening as his attention honed in on Peach. I certainly didn't miss the quick, flattering once over he gave her or the slight deepening of his voice, "_Ciao Bella_."

Peach smiled sweetly, demurely lowering her eyes and peering at Mario through her darkened lashes, "Hi _Mario._.."

I peered at Bowser whose stare seemed to all but burn onto my person. His eyes started from the ground and slowly, meticulously traveled the length of my form until we locked stares. He grinned lopsidedly and mouthed, "_Ravishing."_

My face flushed red as I smiled. _Well, I guess this outfit isn't too bad then_.

A servant approached Peach, quietly addressing a concern about the meal's teacakes. With her attention focused elsewhere, Bowser seized an opportunity and shoved Mario back into his seat.

Peach turned around, just missing the action, "Oh Mario honey, you _could_ have stood to greet us like Bowser! It _is_ the proper way to greet royal ladies after all."

Bowser laughed darkly as Mario looked cross, "Now wait-a minute—!"

"_Afternoon ladies_," Bowser smirked ruthlessly, more than happy to cut his foe off. And just to piss Mario off even further, Bowser offered a gallant bow that had Peach smiling happily.

Another servant approached Luigi, softly uttering something along the lines of Unc wanting to speak to him. Surprised, Luigi blinked before quietly excusing himself from the table.

Peach stepped forward, gesturing towards the table, "Now then, since pleasantries have been exchanged, how about we—_oh!"_

A sudden strong, vicious gust of crazy wind howled and sent hair aflutter and dresses trailing. Peach's dress danced and spun around her ankles, Mario's hat toppled off his head as Bowser, with crossed arms, squinted against the raze of sand and wind.

"_Oh no!_ I worked so hard on these _curls_!" Peach lamented softly, guarding her face from whipping sands.

"I just hope this isn't a sandstorm, that would ruin things," I murmured, squinting against flying sand.

A second harsh blast of hot wind made a couple of the servants retreat for the safety of the palace as Peach mewled discontentedly, shielding her eyes.

"_Sheyt!"_ I snapped. Too much of my legs were exposed and with a loud gasp, I quickly held down my skirt, as Bowser _suddenly_ peered my way.

Mother Nature scoffed and must have been like: _Princess Daisy? In a skirt and trying to be modest? Oh nooo, we can't have none of that! Because she's gonna show the boys her goodies today!_

A crazier, harder wind struck with the full force of a gale, sending prearranged napkins and banners sailing into the sky. Servants quailed with dismay, scattering in multiple directions to retrieve the fluttering ornaments, cutlery and decorations.

"Chocopo!" Peach whispered urgently against the wind.

Which was our designated, discreet girl code word to say my undies were showing. I shrieked girlishly, cheeks blooming with color. I could totally see my colorful boyshorts and flushed red-hot.

"_Sheyt!"_ I cried half angrily and half dismayed, "Why Stars! _Why_!?"

I clamped down the still-fluttering hem of my skirt and petticoat as Peach quickly came to my aid, holding down the back of my skirt, tinkling with soft laughter. I growled at Peach, who had the audacity to giggle traitorously.

"You're covered now," Peach grinned.

The winds died down to soft, gentle wisps as the servants began to slowly detach themselves from the safety of the palace. I shot a nervous glance towards the boys, hoping I hadn't awarded them any damn free shows. Mario was a few yards away, chasing after his beloved red cap.

Bowser was pointedly looking away, avoiding my stare. What really gave him away was the telltale dark red blush on his face. My face must have become as hot as an oven. _Sheyt! Sheyt! Sheyt! Sheyt!_

Oh great, oh friggin' great. This was now probably going to become something he'd hang over my head and tease me about for years. I was mortified and hurriedly turned away. Mario returned, nestling his cap onto his head as he shielded his eyes from the harsh sun.

Peach must have seen the blushes from both Bowser and I because she began laughing her ass off _again_. I stomped over to Peach and prodded my index finger into her chest.

She quirked an eyebrow, removing my prying hand from her person, "Daisy! Will you keep your hands to yourself? Didn't know you were so _frisky_..."

"You know exactly what I'm doing! I'm clearly not trying to cop a feel!"

"Really?" Peach was laughing again, "You could have fooled me. With all that cho-chi poking, or whatever the Sarasalandian word is."

"_Chi-chi_. You mean _chi-chi_ poking and really? Now you're just being stupid!"

I realized the boys were watching our sisterly banter. Mario was in my peripherals and I could see his amused grin, but I didn't care, "Stop laughing Peach, it's not funny!"

"If you occasionally acted like a lady, it wouldn't happen," Peach arched an eyebrow in challenge, as if daring me to refute her statement.

"How? How the hell should I 'act like a lady?!'" I crossed my arms and tapped my foot impatiently.

She grinned, "Simple. Try being more aware of things."

"Such as...?"

"Oh, like the huge breeze about to come," she said with humor. She leaned forward and whispered only loud enough for my ears, "and now Mario and Bowser both are watching us. Of course Mario is used to your upskirt episodes, having been around since his infantile years. Though Bowser seems _quite_ flustered to say the least. Quit giving the Koopa free shows, will you?"

"You pink..._jerk_! You think this is funny don't you!?" I snarled, " And what breeze are you talking about!? What huge—_ARGH!_"

This time the entire back of my skirt fluttered, lifting flirtatiously as horror stole my expression. I shrieked before hurriedly tugging my skirt down, totally mortified with blush scalding my entire face. Peach smirked, helpfully holding down my errant hemline so I didn't pull another Marilyn MonKoopa.

Peach and Mario were too busy laughing as Bowser's jaw dropped, his face growing redder and redder. Then, because the king was so preoccupied with my fluttering hemline, he took a huge misstep and ended up tripping over a chair, flipping over the table with a terrifically loud thud.

Bowser splashed out magnificently, pulling off the elegant lace table cloth, knocking over a few flower vases and finished with landing flat on his back with all the helplessness of an ordinary turtle. He squirmed and kicked and fought and tried with his best efforts to right himself, but luck was not on his side.

"Damn it! Not this helpless shit again!" Bowser cried angrily.

Mario _lived_ for that. He burst into peals of laughter, clutching his stomach as Peach and several nearby servants hurried to help the fallen king up. I was still too embarrassed to think coherently enough and offer to help Bowser back onto his feet.

_"Oh Stars_!" Mario croaked, choking on his words, "He fell flat on his back-a! _Ahaha!_"

"Mario, it wasn't _that_ funny..." Peach whispered, sensitive to Bowser's smashed pride.

"Mark my words Duke Dipshit!" Bowser snarled, eyes narrowed and teeth bared. He tried to rock back and forth in an effort to build up enough momentum to swing onto his feet, but it just wasn't happening, "When I can stand. I'm going to _kill you._"

"King Bowser, we'll help you," A servant approached cautiously, all too aware of his rising temper, "We'll have you back on your feet in no time."

Bowser wiggled and kicked and flailed his arms and yet was no closer to standing. Mario continued his riotous laughter, doubling over and teary eyed; this only served to piss Bowser off even further," Star damn! We'll see how much you'll laugh when my fist meets your ugly, chewed-up face!"

It was a laborious effort that took twelve servants and several failed attempts—where one servant was almost squashed under Bowser's massive weight—before they managed to swing Bowser back onto his feet.

The King stood shakily, completely red-faced as he scared off any hovering servants with a thick, reverberating growl and a smoldering jaw.

He shot a deadly glare at Mario who continued to cackle to the point of tears. And every time Mario finished laughing, he stopped, peered at Bower, then began again with renewed laughter.

"Hey Bowser," Mario laughed, "Who's-a this?"

Mario pretended to take a vicious spill and flopped on his back with all the decor and elegance of Petey Piranha. Immediately the hero burst into new peals of laughter. Peach turned her head away but I realized she was laughing too.

That broke the last of Bowser's thinning patience as he growled savagely, smoke rising from his nostrils and he began to stomp towards Mario furiously. Bowser raised his fists, ready to put them to good use.

Peach and I exchanged a quick glance before intercepting, she rushed over to Mario as I stepped in front of Bowser. Peach had the easier task here as Mario was pretty subdued, just laughing his ass off. Bowser was trying to get passed me to punch out Mario.

"He thinks he can laugh at _me_ without getting a fist in his face!? No one laughs at _me_!"

"I'm sure I laugh at you _all _the time," I teased, grinning smugly.

But Bowser was too into ending Mario. He was snarling, "Let me club that laughing idiot! I'll rip his ugly mustache off and then shove it up his ass crack!"

I held my arms out," Come on, let's settle down Bowser. You're both even now."

"Even _how_!? He laughed at me! _Me!?_ No one laughs at me and keeps all their teeth!"

"You pushed him earlier and he got you back with this. You're even now, okay? Besides, you promised my dad you wouldn't fight, right?"

Bowser sighed, rolling his eyes, "...Yeah I did. Doesn't mean I'm happy about it though."

I patted his shoulder, "Good Bowwy..."

Bowser looked to be slowly calming down, until we both realized Mario was _still _ laughing his ass off, not making things much better.

Bowser's temper flared madly, eyes wild and bright as he snarled loudly, "..._Stupid, fat, sexless, sonnva_—!"

He stepped forward to make a go at Mario, but I held strong; oh no, Bowser wasn't crossing this line of scrimmage, "Come on Bowser, let's sit down—"

My skirt began to dance within the playful wind current again. The hem was nearly thigh-level when I gasped, quickly slapping it down, cheeks pink.

Bowser blinked before laughing lightly, "...Alright. I'm gonna let that tacky plumber slide just this _once _because apparently, Mr. Wind is loving your cute lil dress."

Bowser's growing grin left me embarrassed as hell. My usual combination of a strawberry-pink blush and floundering embarrassment put him in good humor. Bowser was in such a genial mood he completely forgot about their scuffle and pulled out my chair with bow. I sat as Mario, still grinning—pulled out Peach's seat for her.

The guys promptly followed suit, quietly settling into their chairs. I blinked when Bowser took his seat, sitting close enough that his arm brushed against mine and I could feel the warmth radiating from his large form.

"By the way, you look really nice," he spoke so softly and in such a deep register I nearly missed his words.

I smiled, catching the tail end of his crooked grin, "Thanks. You...look nice too."

Bowser smirked, eyes closed in a moment of silent contentment. He was about to reply but halted when Mario cleared his throat.

Though Mario kept a perfectly straight face, I noticed the mischievous twinkle in his eyes, "Liked what you-a saw back there, Bowser? You were certainly-a falling all over-a yourself."

My head snapped up when Bowser growled. He suddenly leapt up and punched his index claw at Mario's grinning face, "Suck a pipe and shut the hell up Plumber pervert! You shouldn't have been looking _anyways_."

"Yeah _okaaaaaay_," Mario rolled his eyes, still grinning with amusement, "just remember-a _you're _the one blushing redder than my shirt-a. Who's the real perv!"

"And he was gawking the entire time at Daisy too," Peach pointed out helpfully, smiling with a cheeky grin.

"_Peach_!" I snapped, cheeks glowing with blush.

"Yeah King Bowser, or should-a I say, King Perv," Mario trilled with rising laughter.

No one saw it coming when Bowser tapped into some hidden reserves and pounced with surprising cat-like reflexes. He suicide dove over the table and tried to strangle Mario. Again I grabbed onto Bowser, hoping to talk sense into him as Peach held back Mario, but really it wasn't necessary.

Mario hadn't even made a single move; he wasn't looking for a fight, just aiming to stir up the pot a smidgen. As Bowser continued to struggle, curse and reach for Mario's throat, the plumber was grinning hugely, laughing.

"Come on now Machi," I called out, "Let's not antagonize Bowser anymore, huh?"

Mario rolled his eyes, "Alright...No more from-a me."

"Oh my, such high emotions! Let's keep this fun and safe!" Peach laughed nervously, "Key words being fun and safe!"

"Come on Bowser, you heard Peach," I spoke to him softer; he seemed to respond better, "Settle down alright, everyone knows Mario was just joking. Settle down for me?"

"Fine...But one more. Let me hear _one more_ wisecrack from that ass crack..._One more time_," Bowser growled out through clenched fangs.

The Koopa king still looked pissed, though he finally took his seat beside me, angrily eyeing up his foe. Wow, that glare could melt the shell off a bullet Bill. Peach pointedly cleared her throat, and arched a mischievous brow my way.

What was that look for...? I blinked, realizing I still held—well hugged—Bowser and instantly let go of him. I tried to downplay the entire thing but my cheeks flushed a treacherous shade of carnation.

Peach and Mario covertly exchanged a knowing glance; it happened so quickly I nearly missed it. Usually when conversations died away and awkward silence began to creep forth, Peach—or Mario—were the kind of personalities to happily prevent such an occurrence.

But here they both were, carefully watching us. Their staring was _really_ obvious and Bowser would have noticed too, if he wasn't still fuming.

Peach's stare was cat-like and sharp, scrupulously lingering between Bowser and I as Mario watched the king with an atypically high level of interest.

_What the hell are they doing?_

This was beginning to become really, really awkward. Peach must have realized how long she had been staring and suddenly became lucid once more. She peered at us with a smile and clapped her hands together, "So! I think it's high time we get the tea party started, don't you?"

"Yeah...sure..." I murmured.

"Maybe if I stuff my face, I won't feel the need to punch Mario in the face," Bowser snarled.

Mario either didn't hear him, or ignored him; I'd say the latter. Peach motioned the staff onward with a wave of her hand. The servants approached quietly, soft smiles on their faces and platters of delectable food in hand. They moved quickly, setting the table with three different flavored teas, buttery, airy biscuits and cream scones.

Bowser seemed to have forgotten his previous irritation and happily piled cream scones onto his plate with lightning-fast claws and helped himself to an entire tea kettle. Mario and Peach watched him with mild interest, helping themselves to a modest portion of the refreshments as well.

Mario bit deeply into a finger sandwich, happily humming, "This is good-a!"

"That it is!" Peach nibbled daintily at the tiny sandwich, "And it's nice and small too. Friendly for the waistline as well."

I was hungry and wasn't trying to impress anyone here. I'd known Mario my entire existence, Peach was my cousin and Bowser was my best friend; manners be damned. I'm going to stuff my face and no one can stop me.

Though I devoured the tiny sandwiches with unladylike gusto and licked my fingers clean, Bowser was definitely the center of attention.

He unabashedly angled the spout of the tea kettle into his mouth, leaned back and drained the tea in one long continuous chug. Errant tea dribbled down his chin and onto his plastron but he was on a mission and downed the entire pot in a single go.

Peach and Mario gaped incredulously—jaws hanging and eyes enlarged—before they slowly went back to their meals, pretending to ignore his atrocious table manners.

If they were annoyed by Bowser's loud slurping, sucking and chewing, they both hid it well. Though Peach's smile was just the tiniest bit strained.

Bowser finished his meal with a satisfied sigh, happily leaning back in his seat and resting his hands beneath his head. Peach cleared her throat delicately, "So King Bowser, how have things been going for you?"

"What do you mean?" He grunted, though I noticed his tone wasn't unkind.

Peach leaned forward, interlocking her fingers into a tight knot, "I mean, how are you fairing with what happened in the Aqualands? We all know what...transpired. What Prince Taurus had done to you, Bowser."

Bowser suddenly went rigid, muscles locking up as his jaw clenched with restrained ire. He was about to fire back a snarky remark, but Peach raised a hand to silence him, "I just wanted to let you know that what he did was unspeakably reprehensible. So deplorable in fact, the Mushroom Kingdom has ceased all trades with the Aqualands."

This was the first time I had heard this. I peered at Peach with a raised eyebrow, "Really? Well, not that I'm surprised or anything, because it makes sense."

"That includes a few other kingdoms as well," Peach continued, her expression was unusually frigid, "After hearing about what Taurus did to Bowser, Nimbusland and the Moonstone Kingdom quietly broke or reduced their commerce."

"And what he did to you Daisy," Peach shook her head, lips pulled into a tight pucker, "He's such a slimeball. How dare he ask something so awful of you. It just proves not all royals are gents. If I see him, I'm going to slap him across the face!"

I laughed, "I would pay to see you wallop him a good one."

Mario's relaxed posture tensed, "Daisy, you're like a sister to me-a."

Bowser gave a glare brimming with disgust, "Ugh. _Terrible mental images_."

But the renowned hero continued, "I normally don't like starting fights, but what-a he did to you...what he said to you was awful. I'll happily make an exception and fight-a him for you. I'll defend your honor."

Though I was touched Mario wanted to beat the snot out of Taurus—and I was truly _considering _his offer—anything Mario did would undoubtedly be tied into Sarasaland's reputation and the already ugly situation would only escalate.

"Thanks, but no thanks Machi. We've got to handle this one in the political arena. Though punching his face in _does _sound kind of nice..."

"Wait in line, Plumb puke," Bowser snorted. He began to slowly wind his hand into a tightly clenched fist, "Because I've got first dibs on the Aquatic asshole. If there's going to be someone here who will beat up Taurus in Fl—_Daisy's_ honor then it will be me."

The sheer honesty and ardor behind his words surprised all of us at the table. I was stunned, still drinking in Bowser's impassioned expression and how his eyes seemed to glow.

Then just as fast as it had arrived, all that fire and zeal cooled as he turned to face me with a softer, muted expression, "Of course...only if _you_ want me to..."

It happened again; Peach and Mario shared another quick, discreet glance and then they were back to watching our interactions closely. I could see Peach's large smile and all the rapt attention from Bowser had me flustered.

I could already feel my face growing warmer with each passing second, "Oh? Well...Uh, yeah, sure. I'm fine with it. With you. I-I mean, with _you _beating Taurus' face in! Heh..."

"Well just so you know Flo—uh Daisy—I mean, whoever you are," Bowser began to laugh at his own mix-up.

"Okay, _Bowser_," though smiling, Peach rolled her eyes, "Did you think we were born yesterday!? We all_ know _you call her by that adorable nickname. Don't stop on our behalf. Mario and I keep secretly quite nicely, don't we dear?"

"Of course," Mario agreed quietly, once again he was closely observing Bowser, "But we already knew-a about the nickname thing."

Bowser's face flushed red before he growled, "..._Nosey little Mushroom freaks._ Not that it's any of your damn business what I call her. And not that I care what you guys think anyways..._Prats_..."

"Bowser, contrary to what you believe, Mario and I, we mean to align ourselves as your allies," Peach replied, valiantly ignoring all of Bowser's insults, "There's no need to be guarded around us."

"No need to be guarded around them she says!" Bowser laughed incredulously, "Did you hear that Flower? This guy has been bombarding and blowing up my castles for decades and yet Blondie-Cakes tells me not to be guarded! Ain't that some shit!?"

Mario threw up his hands, "You-a start it! It's not like I do it for fun! And don't call her-a that. Her name is _Peach_."

Bowser leaned forward, craning his neck so he could stare Mario dead in the eye. While grinning rakishly, Bowser chimed, "Blondie-Cakes. Blondie-Cakes. _Blondie-Cakes. Do _something about it _MarMar_."

Peach placed a consoling hand on Mario's shoulder, "Let it go, Hon. It's not that big of a deal."

Mario nodded, and though he continued to glare at Bowser, he quietly chomped at his meal. Peach suddenly looked up, arching a playful eyebrow, "Besides, it's not like _Bowser_ can make fun of anyone. _Especially _after the fiasco at the Nimbusland hot springs."

Bowser's head snapped up so fast, he ought to have received whiplash. Whatever the story was behind the Nimbusland hot springs, it must have been good because Mario suddenly exploded into laughter and Peach, sweet, innocent Peach, was shooting a sly grin in Bowser's direction.

Bowser's face colored brighter than a tomato and whatever ego he had, was thoroughly trashed. His eyes were wide and darting around nervously, "_H-Hey!_ I thought we promised we would _never _speak of that incident ever _again_! Oaths and vows of silence were taken that day and you need to respect those!"

Mario was still howling and Peach looked pointedly in my direction, "Daisy, would _you _like to hear Bowser's _hilarious _hot springs story?"

I peered at Mario, who was clutching his stomach from laughing so hard, "Well yeah. It has to be funn—"

Bowser rose from the table, flapping his arms wildly, "_NO! NO! NO! NO! SHE DOESN'T_! Peach! Have I told you how _beautiful _you look today?"

Bowser was kissing ass? Oh Stars, this story had to be _hilarious_. Whatever happened, Bowser did not want me knowing about it. And anytime he didn't want me to know something, hilarity usually followed.

"Alright then," Peach purred, "If you want me to keep it a secret, then no more. No more slights, no more insults. Can we do that, _King Bowser_?"

Bowser didn't look happy, "...I can do that. But only if you _swear _you won't tell that story."

"I won't if you won't," Peach winked coquettishly, sipping her steaming tea.

The King grumbled something under his breath but slipped into his seat. The last of Mario's laughter died away as he wiped his eyes free of tears. Bowser stuffed several teacake pastries into his mouth, chewing laboriously as if it were made of jerky.

Peach smiled, "We should enjoy these moments together. Who knows how long we'll have together. After all, the Mushroom Kingdom's busiest season is summer!"

Bowser suddenly looked up, slightly surprised even, "Uh...that reminds me. I've got something I want to tell you, Flower..."

I shrugged, "Sure what is it?"

Mario and Peach suddenly leaned forward, looking very excited to devour whatever morsel of information Bowser was about to share. The King glared at them, "I'd like to tell you _alone_."

I grinned the second Peach's face dropped, "You don't mind if we step out for a sec?"

_Of course she minded_; Peach _loved_ gossip, especially if that gossip involved me and my relationship with men. Peach did a terrible job at hiding her dismay, "No, of course not..."

I was surprised when Bowser boldly clutched my hand and began to lead me away from our picnic site. I didn't miss the way Peach's eyes lit up at his forward gesture or how Mario arched a brow.

_Well, that'll give Peachy something to talk about while I'm gone..._

* * *

><p>"Flower, now that we don't have that <em>plumber plebeian<em> and the...well, whatever Peach is, watching us, there's something I've got to tell you."

The sun was beginning to set in the desert as the sky was aglow with an explosion of crimson, magenta and orange ribbons melding into one beautiful rubicund horizon. Bowser had more than happily led us away from the prying ears and eyes of my dear cousin and Mario, who had been oddly invested in our interactions.

I peered at Bowser, "So, now that we're alone, what did you want to tell me."

"It's kind of sudden, but," he sighed deeply, "I've got to do what I've got to do. Flower, I've already spoken with your old man about it and tomorrow I've got to go..."

My brows furrowed into a firm knot, "I don't understand? Go where?"

"I've got to leave you, Hon," he spoke softly, turning to wholly face me. He was carefully watching my expression, "Something's come up back at home and I've got to take care of it."

Well, I can't say I didn't know this was coming. He had to leave eventually but I didn't expect it to be so soon. He had a kingdom to oversee, councilors and advisors to lead and most importantly, children to care for. So yes, I should have seen this coming.

But that didn't stop me from feeling so damn sad. I quickly turned my back to him so he wouldn't see just how glassy my eyes became and how badly my face contorted and puckered up as I battled against a torrent of emotions.

"Well, if you've got to go, then go," that came out far angrier than I wanted and they definitely weren't the best parting words to shoot off at a dear friend. But with everything going on involving the Aqualands, and all the kingdoms judging and watching Sarasaland for the slightest signs of weakness, him leaving felt like an abandonment.

What if he returned to the Darklands and the Firelands council had somehow managed to break up our alliance? What if he left and couldn't come back, not because he didn't want to but because politically he couldn't.

The longer I thought about it, the more upset I became. It was very possible his kingdom could forbid him from seeing me anymore, they could decide Sarasaland wasn't worth the hassle and simply dissolve our new treaty.

"Thanks for stopping by," I didn't quite snap but my words were clipped. I know Bowser wasn't the true source of my anger, but he was the only person, the only thing near me I could unleash on, "I'm glad you participated in my courtship and really—"

A large, warm hand gently clasped my shoulder and with very little pressure he spun me around to face him. I was glaring at anything but him, blinking rapidly and trying to fight back the hot tears that kept blurring my vision.

"Flower," his voice was velveteen, deep and soft, "Look at me."

"No," I huffed petulantly.

"Flower...Come on doll face. Look at me."

I released a deep, shaky sigh and finally peered up at him. His expression was gentle, understanding, "You know I'd give anything in the world to stay longer with you, right?"

"Yes..."

"Good," he didn't smile but his eyes crinkled happily, "Whoa, and what's this?"

I was startled when a large claw swiped under my lower eyelashes. Bowser grinned so largely I could see all his sharp incisors, "Are you crying? Are you about to cry for _me_?"

"I'm not crying!"

"Yeah you are!" He was still smiling, "Your eyes are all shiny and sparkly and wet! Well, shit. My ego just quadrupled!"

"We're standing out in a desert—where there's sand—and we're looking into the sun like morons, of course my eyes are going to water!" I barked, and already I could feel my face starting to grow warm.

Bowser laughed loudly, "You're just too damn proud to admit it, aren't you? All this stubborn pride and strength, you sure you weren't a Koopa in your past life or something? Well then my stubborn little _Purga_ I'll tell you something too. I'm going to miss you too."

I finally peered up at Bowser once more, all bravado and ego set aside. He stared back, expression calm and eyes glowing beneath the radiant red sunset. His soft stare renewed my courage as I slowly unglued my tongue from the roof of my mouth and whispered, "I'll miss you too Bowser...I really will."

"But when I leave, you've got to promise me one thing," he laughed.

"Anything..."

He grinned lopsidedly, "You've got to learn to become a little more girl-ish. Girly? Yeah, something like that."

I stopped smiling immediately, "What do you mean? No really, explain yourself you jumbo-sized turtle."

He laughed, "_Whooooa_, easy Tigress! I'm just saying, as a princess, you're gonna be expected to wear dresses and skirty...things. You flashed two guys and one of them is a Plumber pervert. And yes, I know you see _him_ as a brother, why though is frickin' beyond me."

I blushed red-hot in an unhealthy blend of embarrassment and rising anger. I was good and well about to light into him when he placed a placating hand on my shoulder, "I'm only telling you this because I care and I don't want other guys looking at you...in...less than..._friendly ways_. Otherwise I'm going to kick them in their ass. Got it?"

"It's not like I'm doing it on purpose!" I snapped

Bowser laughed largely,"Could of fooled me."

I punched his arm as he continued to laugh, "You saw a big, hunky Koopa and thought," Bowser was laughing himself stupid and only continued to escalate with the antics. He began to talk in a girlish falsetto," 'Oh _teehee_! I'm gonna win that Koopa king hottie! Teehee_ whoopies_ there goes my _skirty_~!'"

"Why are your impersonations of me so sucky!?" I was trying not to smile. I was not smiling because he was making fun of me and it wasn't funny at all.

Not in the least bit.

"I mean I'm not gonna lie," Bowser continued roaring with laughter, "it certainly got my attention. But really though Flower. Don't let that kind of thing happen ever." Then he grinned smugly, obviously looking to start trouble, "But you can do that when I'm around."

I huffed, crossing my arms, "I'm not doing that ever. _Especially_ if you're around."

Bowser laughed softly, "I've got one last question for you, _Purga_."

I sighed, peering at him through annoyed, lowered eyelids, "Well Bowser, you've made fun of me already, how much worse can you get? Sure, _go ahead_."

Bowser's sly, devil-may-care expression softened into curiosity, "What's that thing under your skirt?"

_Excuse me? Excuse the hell out of me!? _

My face burned red, as I hurriedly fixed my skirt, "You ornery, n-no good turtle perv! D-Did you really just say 'That thing under your skirt!?' You shouldn't even be thinking about anything under my damn—"

"The white, lacy thing," He even tilted his head, trying to angle his head better to peer up my skirt.

I flushed red; _oh this nonsense has to end now_. He seemed genuinely surprised when I grabbed the sides of his face and gently tilted his head until he was looking at my face once more.

Something about his behavior didn't strike me as malicious or lecherous. Just inquisitive. I'm guessing the Koopettes in the Darklands didn't use petticoats if he had _no_ clue what they were.

Besides, it seemed like something a lady-slaying man would be knowledgeable of. I've overheard several young noble men talking amongst themselves, wondering how to best go about removing certain intimate clothing from a young woman's figure and petticoats were one of the mentioned items on their list.

I cleared my throat, making sure to use a neutral voice, "I think you mean my petticoat. It's worn under a skirt or dress for modesty. Lady Angora would be horrified if I didn't wear one."

"It's...pretty," he said so softly I nearly missed it.

Huh, who knew the evil King liked delicate, lacy underthings? Let me add that to the list of things the hellish, evil Koopa King loves: chains, male testosterone badassery, glorious fights, explosions, spikes, and the newest additions yet, _pretty petticoats_.

Of course in the proper universe of decor and manners a lady would be horrified if her slip was seen. I subconsciously smoothed my skirt again, making sure it was in proper alignment.

He smirked, "Judging by your reaction it's something I should not see, eh?"

"Exactly."

"Huh..."

A roll of silence passed; with Bowser staring off into the sky pensively as I tried to understand where the hell this conversation came from, how did it even happen? One moment we were talking about this being his last day here, and then the next we were talking about pretty petticoats. My petticoats.

Our friendship is one helluva weird, strange ride, that's for sure. I cleared my throat, attracting his attention, "So this is the last time I'll see you in awhile, huh?"

"It looks that way," he muttered softly.

"Bowser...I..."

In the back of my mind, I realized Peach and Mario had left us alone. Intentionally? If Peach had anything to do with it then yes. We'd been out here alone for nearly half an hour and no one—no guards, no famed heroes had been sent to find us—Peach definitely had a hand in this one.

Bowser peered at me in thought, before stepping closer, "I've been...meaning to give this to you for awhile now. But I can't think of a better time than now. We're probably not going to be alone anytime soon again."

I gazed up at the blazing red sky in thought; he was absolutely right. It would be a long while before we would be alone together like this.

We would either be in the public's eye where we would be forced to keep up appearances—he would have to be the cruel, ruthless tyrant king of the Darklands and I would have to be a proper, powerless princess—or we would be forced apart with kingdom obligations.

"Alright, well what is it?" I smiled.

I realized Bowser had been hiding something behind his back; where had he kept it this whole time? Somewhere in his shell?

Bowser laughed softly, "Stars, I just got nervous. Well, I better give this to you before I lose my nerve like a chump. Here Flower...I hope you like it..."

Bowser unveiled a large, plain black box. He took both of my hands and slowly unfurled them until my palms were open, sitting supine. Even as he held my hands, I could feel the slight tremor running through his arms; was he really that nervous?

He brushed his large thumb across my palm before placing the box within my hands. I gasped, gaping at the box, astounded, then quickly flashed my gaze back up at Bowser, who was smirking.

The black box hailed from an expensive, exclusive jewelry company only the wealthiest clientele could afford; actors, politicians, crime lords, royalty and a-list stars.

I ran my fingers over the textured leather; whatever lay in this box was no small token. In glittering, golden cursive lettering, _Garnet Star's _stood out boldly against the box's black leather.

"Bowser..." I breathed, shaking my head furiously, "Oh no, no. I-I can't accept this! This is too much! I..."

Bowser laughed jubilantly, "What? Oh come on Flower! You haven't even opened the box yet. You gotta see what's inside."

"You shouldn't have...Look, I don't know much about jewelry and clothes," I slowly turned the box within my fingers, "But I know this is expensive and top of the line. Peach loves this company. Wendy loves this company. Marilyn MonKoopa in her prime bought jewels from here! It's _that_ amazing! Bowser, I don't like jewelry enough for you to be shelling out coins like this!"

Bowser smirked and with an exaggerated sigh, he rolled his eyes, "Do we have to open this together or something? Quit being a drama princess and open it already. Didn't I say I was nervous about this? Open it."

"Fine, only because you're being such a Koopaling about it," I laughed.

I peered up at him one last time before slowly unclasping the _Garnet's Star_ box and pulling the lid back. Bowser grinned widely as I gasped loudly.

Sitting upon fresh, dark velvet were two large, beautiful daisy earrings and a matching glittering necklace. They were nearly identical to my favorite set of earrings I wore daily. They were one of my most prized and cherished gifts my mother had purchased.

It was one of the few physical possessions, one of the last physical attachments I had left of my mother. I didn't like jewelry at all, but I loved my daisy earrings because everywhere I went, I could bring a little piece of my beloved mother with me.

And here Bowser had bought a nearly identical set, plus a beautiful matching necklace. The only real distinguishing difference was instead of aquiline gemstones, the new jewelry was set with beautiful, rich rubies. My hands trembled, rattling badly as I touched the glistening gems with awe.

"I had it custom made for you," Bowser purred his words in a rumbling bass. He was studying my expression closely, "You always wear those earrings and I kind of had to snoop and ask around about what your earrings are made of and who gave them to you..."

I peered up at him, eyes shimmering with unshed tears. I couldn't speak louder than a whisper because my voice was too shaky, too overloaded with emotion, "So you know they're from my mom...? That these earrings are the only thing left I have of her?"

"Yeah," he replied softly.

I blinked rapidly, but no matter how much I attempted to sniff back the tears, they fell on their own. Bowser stopped smiling, "_Oh crap_. You don't like the gift?" He rubbed the back of his head, suddenly looking very deflated, "I-I thought you'd like them just a little bit..."

"No," I shook my head, wiping at my stupid tears, "I really, really like them. I love them Bowser. This is probably the most thoughtful gift anyone has given me. Could you do me a favor?"

He looked confused, but nodded, "Anything Flower."

I lifted my hair and turned my back to him, "Could you put the necklace on for me?"

"Absolutely."

It took awhile for him to fasten the necklace around my neck since his claws were so huge and the golden clasp was tiny. I laughed as he cursed and grumbled under his breath but he gave a triumphant roar when he successfully latched the necklace onto my neck.

I peered down at my new gift, gently running my fingers over the cool surface of the fiery gemstone. The pearl petals of the necklace glowed in a wonderful soft contrast to the brilliant intensity of the ruby. I looked up at Bowser, smiling, "Thank you. I'm going to wear this everyday and think of my wonderful, amazing friend."

I took his large, heavy hand and lightly grazed my lips against the rough scales. With reddened cheeks, I peered up at him, smiling, "Thank you _mi golgo_."

Bowser's eyes grew softer, darker and melting as he purred loudly. He moved forward, grasping my arm and pulling me towards his warm, shelled torso. He spoke in a soft whisper, "I'm very glad you like it. If I leave, you oughta send me off the right way, huh?"

"What's better than a free show?" I scoffed with a blush.

He laughed softly, "I can think of something _else_..."

A wave of excitement pulsed through my body as I leaned in. We drew closer, his eyes were beginning to slip shut as I nervously licked my rouged lips.

A howling wind kissed the back of my thighs, making my skirt and petticoat flutter and tickle his inner thigh. I squeaked, quickly grabbing the back of my skirt, pulling it into its rightful place; I think we both blushed for different reasons.

"Uh, sorry," I laughed breathily, "it has a mind of its own it seems."

"Naïve little tomboy," he whispered, "If I'm not gonna see you for awhile, you better take care of yourself. I can't be here in person anymore to do it. And it may not be safe to visit for awhile."

I fell silent as he continued, quirking a rather sly smile, "Last thing I need to worry about is my little unladylike tomboy giving guys free shows. Not every guy is worthy to see those cute lil' Yoshi boyshorts, you know."

My jaw dropped; _what!?_

He barked with laughter the moment my face glowed ruby-red, nearly the same color as my new necklace and immediately my fists were flying, bouncing off his hard scales. As I reached for him, nails outstretched like claws, he gently restrained my flailing attacks.

"_Sucio Seloh! Y-You leggo of me y-y-you—!"_ I snarled, face red and teeth gnashed, "I'm going to punch you _so_ hard—!"

Bowser sighed, "Soft shell moment, but I _really_ don't want this to be the last time I see you in months. You might...I dunno...maybe...forget about me."

The sincere gleam in his eyes cooled my whirl of anger and embarrassment, "What? Bowser...No. That's never going to happen."

"You promise?" he asked beseechingly, eyes unusually expressive and bright.

I laughed, "You're _the_ King Bowser, if anything I'm the one who should ask you not to forget me. You have thousands of fans, a jam-packed schedule and..."

_And tons of overeager, zealous groupies._ My lip curled in disgust at the thought. What if one of them caught his eye and he...no longer had a place for me? Surely he's thought of a mother for Junior and someone for Wendy especially.

A twinge of something bitter twisted my stomach at the thought of Bowser's affections being poured onto some...pretty Koopette.

He laughed, "Forget about _you_? _Please_. How can I forget such a funny, amazing woman? I close my eyes and still see that scorching red hair, big pretty eyes and I can't get the scent of you out of my head. Yeah, like I'm _really_ gonna forget some leggy Desert hottie like that. I might need Kamek to see if I've been bewitched or something."

I blushed, toeing my heels in the grass, "If you don't forget me, then...I won't forget you..."

"Couldn't forget about you if I tried, Flower," he growled.

Under the darkening blanket of the horizon, Bowser's eyes were intense, smoldering and roiling like magma. For the life of me I could never comprehend what I did or said to have him look at me the way he does. It's like he gives off a physical aura of being afire.

I swallowed, peering up at him as we locked stares, unblinking and that only seemed to draw me in further. He bent over, purring thickly as he pulled me against his shelled-torso and softly touched his lips against mine.

Another gale of spry wind shot by, and I was both surprised and amazed when Bowser carefully held my skirt down, so even as it fluttered and danced with the rhythm of the mischievous wind, it was never immodest.

His show of thoughtfulness left me feeling touched, and even slightly frazzled, "Thank you Bowser..."

He didn't quite smile, but his gaze was softer as he leaned in again for a second kiss, purring loudly.

* * *

><p>"Oh my Stars! Did you see <em>that!?"<em> Peach cooed, pink binoculars raised to her eyes.

She adjusted the scope's range, making sure not to miss a single moment of the romantic scene playing out, "Bowser held down her skirt! He did it because it made her feel comfortable! _Oh_! Isn't that so _sweet!?_ And isn't that ruby necklace absolutely divine!? My, he has some good taste, shopping from _Garnet's Star_ of all places."

The Mushroom Kingdom's hottest and most adored couple had been, for the lack of better words, _spying_ on Daisy and Bowser's alone time. Peach was an expert at reading lips and had given a detailed play by play of everything that had been said.

As Peach continued to gush and coo, Mario reclined languidly, resting his head against his palm. He was completely bored with the entire thing. It had been entertaining to spy on them _the first half hour_.

But now the sun had nearly disappeared and the once sweltering desert was starting to become bone-chillingly cold. Mario stifled another yawn, hoping Peach would finally call it a day and they could go back in doors.

"_Ooh!_ _Well, well, well_! Who really knew Bowser was a closet romantic!" Peach nearly grinned wildly, even leaning forward as she tried to zoom in on the action, "Kissing slowly under the stars hmm? I _knew_ that tough, badboy act was nothing but a facade!"

Mario yawned again, peering up at Peach wearily, "_Cara_, don't you think it's-a time we went in-a for the day? Your dad is probably worried about-a us. Well just _you_ actually. He-a hates me for some reason..."

"Okay, it looks like they're finally heading back in," Peach continued trailing the petal-pink binoculars after the couple, "Oh look! They're holding hands! How precious is _this_!?"

Holding hands? Though Bowser had inadvertently spilled how much he loved Daisy, Mario still couldn't help but think of his younger brother. Luigi was sweet, shy, sensitive and if this thing between Bowser and Daisy was real, it would break his heart.

Luigi had admired and pined after one girl for most of his life. And for a long while, Luigi hadn't really had real competition for her; Mario had assumed that sometime Daisy would eventually realize what had always been in front of her; a kind, empathetic friend who would make a stellar boyfriend.

But now that there were suitors, other men in the picture, Luigi's once promised future with the Desert princess didn't seem all that foretold. Somewhere along the way she had been swept off her feet by foreign princes, men who already had everything they wanted.

How could someone as humble and demure as his brother have a shot against handsome, rich princes? So while Mario tried to think of how he could help his brother win Daisy, Bowser's sudden whirlwind affection came straight out of left field. And judging by what he had seen at today's tea party, it was a reciprocated affection.

When the hell did they start liking each other? Ever since the _Summani_, Peach had been suspicious something was 'going on' between them, but Mario thought nothing of it.

And even when they visited the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario ignored the few times he caught Bowser staring a little too long after Daisy. But this? What he was seeing before his own eyes was full-blown attraction. This would wreck his little brother.

Mario's expression darkened, "Peach...if Bowser and-a Daisy are together then what about-a Luigi?"

Peach smiled sadly, "_Oh Luigi_...The poor dear's been in love with Daisy for years..."

"He's my baby brother," Mario whispered. He watched Bowser and Daisy. The odd couple was curled up together, watching the last of the dying light fade away, "He's going to be absolutely-a crushed if he knew how-a much they like each other."

"This is tough, Marmar," Peach's voice was barely above a whisper, "Love is never an easy thing. It's Daisy's choice to choose her suitor, we both knew there was a chance she wouldn't choose Luigi."

Mario's expression scrunched up, "Maybe. But no one thought she'd-a choose _Bowser_!"

Peach laughed softly, "That's true. And honestly, no one thought he'd fall so hard for her."

That was the truth. It wasn't unnoticed how Bowser suddenly stopped terrorizing the Mushroom Kingdom, how he began to proactively reach out to other kingdoms and cement previously broken relationships. And though Bowser would always remain as sarcastic, snarky, and ill-tempered, he was kinder.

It wasn't obvious to outsiders looking in, but to those who truly knew Bowser, his reformation was very apparent. And they would be stupid not to capitalize on it.

This was as nice as Bowser was going to be and they'd be damned if they let this opportunity get away from them. This weird relationship was one of the best things to happen to a multitude of people: to Bowser, to Daisy, the Mushroom King and to Sarasaland.

And with Bowser being in a hospitable, generous mood, it meant a greater prosperity for all. His flourishing kingdom had a hand in every other kingdom's economics. There was no real concrete proof, but ever since Bowser started seeing Daisy, global trades had been much more successful, economies began to thrive and the job market expanded.

"They're...good for each other," Peach spoke softly.

Mario didn't say anything against it, but that didn't make things any easier. Bowser's welfare was important, but his little brother's happiness trumped everything else. Luigi was a good man who asked for very little, and he deserved the one thing, the one person he really wanted.

"...Yeah," Mario replied, brows furrowed, "I guess..."

* * *

><p>Luigi entered the dining room as instructed by the servants. There he found the tall, spry king of the Mushroom kingdom thoughtfully peering out of a window.<p>

The sky was already coloring with the whimsical plums and ceruleans of dusk, and Luigi had a feeling he had missed the tea party. Apricotto pivoted on his heel, grinning widely, "Ah, Luigi! The man in green! Glad you could join me."

"Thanks for-a having me," he replied softly, "How can I help-a you, Sire?"

King Apricotto strolled over until he was a few feet away. He fondly patted Luigi's shoulder and began to lead him over to the long dining table, "We should have had this talk a long time ago, shouldn't we?"

"Uh...? Sure?" Luigi shrugged, slightly confused.

"Take a seat, Son."

Both men sat at the long table. Luigi peered around the quiet dining room as Apricotto stared at him with a large, unsettling grin. Luigi looked at the clock, ticking precious seconds away and then peered back at Apricotto who was still grinning at him unblinkingly.

Luigi stared at the table, noticing the mirror-like polish and the fresh floral vases set to create a warm, ambient environment. And Apricotto was _still _grinning at him, _staring_.

Tired of the odd stretch of silence and Apricotto's weird, unabashed staring, he finally asked, "Uh, Your majesty. Is-a there _something_ you want to-a talk about—?"

Apricotto scared the hell out of Luigi when he suddenly leapt forward and fondly clapped his arm on Luigi's shoulder, "_Luigi_!

"_GAH!"_

"I should have done this a long, long time ago!" Apricotto boomed, "But it was just recently brought to my attention that you're fond of a princess we both know and love."

Luigi's befuddlement quickly dissolved as his face flushed red. Luigi nervously twiddled his thumbs and gulped heavily, "W-Well...Y-Yes..."

Apricotto boomed with jubilant laughter so loud Luigi jumped once more, "Oh! No need to be so shy, Son! I can see why you're so madly in love with her. She's beautiful, spunky and smart! She'll make a great queen someday. I should know. I know her very well. Her whole life even! She's perfect, eh?"

Luigi smiled softly, nodding his head in agreement.

"So really, Son," Apricotto stood up and began to pace a calculated circle around Luigi, "Are you tired of playing games?"

"Uh...?" Luigi raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Well, I am too. Except for Mushroomopoly because really, that game gets really intense and brings out the evils in people. But anyways," Apricotto waved off the confusing statement, "Let's not fool around anymore and get to the heart of the matter."

Apricotto stopped pacing and once more clapped a firm hand on Luigi's shoulder, "I'm going to make this as _humanly clear_ as possible. I know you're in love with our beloved princess. And I want to arrange a marriage for you."

Luigi's eyes grew starry and bright, "R-Really? B-But she has-a so many suitors!"

"What? _Pfft!_ Nonsense. Those guys _suck_ in comparison to you!" Apricotto chirruped happily, "I've seen them all and I think they're all ugly compared to you. They make you look like a green...handsome..._beast_."

A little confused, Luigi still managed to smile at the odd compliment, "...Thanks?"

"So what do you say Luigi?" Apricotto grinned, "What do you say to marrying the girl you've loved since childhood?"

"Yes! Of course!" Luigi's face flushed a deep red.

"It took all your life, but it's finally happening! I'm arranging you to marry..._giiiiive me a drumroll, Son!_"

Luigi happily pounded his hands against the tabletop in a fast cadence as Apricotto cried out in an overdone, announcer voice, "You're being arranged to..._Marry Princess Peach_!"

Luigi's face drooped drastically and he immediately killed the dramatic drum line_,"...Huh!?"_

"_You win a braaaaand new bride_!" Apricotto tried again, "_Priiiiiiincess Peeeeeach_!"

Luigi blinked slowly, "But...I love _Daisy_..."

Apricotto stopped smiling, "...What?"

"I-I've always liked Daisy..."

"No, that can't be correct," Apricotto rubbed his chin, peering skyward in thought, "Sak said a "certain famous plumber" is deeply in love with his beauteous niece. And that's _you_."

Luigi wasn't the type of personality to blatantly call someone an idiot to their face, but his expression certainly gave away exactly what he was thinking.

A light bulb moment happened for the blonde king, "_Ohhhh_...Sakuro meant the _other _plumber..."

"Yes, _Mario_..."

"Oh..." Apricotto stated softly, "Uh, _oops_..."

Luigi sighed, slowly introducing his face into his palm as Apricotto continued to think aloud, "Well...this _is_ kind of awkward now..."

Apricotto frowned, spinning around angrily, "Now wait just a darn minute! If that's true then that means _Mario _likes her! And I don't like him!"

Luigi's jaw dropped, "_W-What_!? You don't like-a Mario!? Who doesn't like Mario!? He's saved your-a daughter like, a million times!"

"_Because," _Apricotto rolled his eyes, crossing his arms, "That guy is such a goody-goody. Always running around and...and..._saving my daughter. Tch!_ What? Am I supposed to be _impressed_!?"

"_Yes_!" Luigi cried.

"He's also always liked my Peachie Pie. Don't _think_ I haven't seen the way he gives her all those lovey-dovey stares," Apricotto looked genuinely annoyed, "Well. If Mario wants to win daughter, then he's going to have to prove himself."

This time, Luigi threw his hands up, "_Mama Mia_..."

Eyes narrowed, Apricotto rubbed his chin in thought, "If he's really serious...then I'll think of some way he can prove himself to me, and to my Peachie Pie...Whatever it is though, it'll have to be epic and..._manly_."

Luigi sighed; this conversation had not only been downright ridiculous, it was wasting his time, "So, I can go now?"

"Huh? Oh yes, yes go ahead. Leave me to my thoughts."

With that, Luigi left the dining hall. He hoped the planned picnic he had missed for _this _hadn't been too awesome. But really, he knew he had missed a ton of good stuff; anytime Mario and Bowser were near each other, legendary _fails_ happen.

And he probably had missed a ton.

_Damn it._

* * *

><p>There was a light wrap of knuckles against my door, "Princess, are you up and dressed?"<p>

"Yep, I am. Thanks."

"Please come downstairs in thirty minutes, King Bowser will ship off."

"Alright, thank you."

Dawn definitely came too soon. I was up and dressed in record time, and had been killing time through doing really meaningless tasks; organizing an already tidy room, fretting over my appearance, and offering to feed Firefly even though I had done so already.

The only activity I really had enjoyed was reading and sorting through my new mail; there were several letters from my suitors. Silver, Ryu and Wolfe all happily sent correspondences.

They each inquired about my days, a few of the bolder letters—sent from Wolfe—wondered if I had missed him and if I daydreamed about his 'smoking hot bod.'

Silver informed me of his days spent at the Moonstonian palace; it was currently twenty degrees, and he thought the weather was just starting to get warm.

Warm for me was ninety degrees, warm for him was probably an appalling thirty. And despite all the strife between Sarasaland and the Aqualands, the Moonstone kingdom was more than pleased to have Silver and I continued seeing each other.

Wolfe's letters were unsurprisingly silly and humorous. Life carried on in Land's End, he had watched over the Chow puppy nursery where the puppies had happily tore through several of his favorite socks.

He lamented about being stuck on night watch where he caught several couples not so quietly making out behind bushes, and he more than happily ruined their fun by dousing them with water balloons.

As the clan head, Ryu was always busy. He was either involved with overseeing festivals, tea ceremonies and of course, keeping his mischievous grandfather out of trouble.

I laughed when Ryu had warned me how I wasn't the only royal desert girl who had caught a Shinobi's attention. Since our departure from the Hidden Lotus, Grandpa Ryunosuke had been asking about Grammy's eligibility and if she was seeing someone.

I wrote them all back and the last two letters I came across were a surprise. The first was from Lazinne, who wanted to have a 'girl's day' together.

The Hidden Lotus was going to have a moon festival and once she finished reading fortunes, she would journey over to Sarasaland. A day with Lazinne sounded fun; she was witty, spunky and very friendly. I bet Peach would like her when she stopped by.

The last letter was from Clawdia Koopa of all people. I triple checked to make sure I hadn't misread; yes, this was definitely from the stately ex-queen of the Darklands. The letter was handwritten and smelt faintly of a heady blend of spice and vanilla.

_Princess Sarasaland,_

_My dearest condolences about the dreadful feud between your kingdom and the Aqualands. I know things must be very stressful right now. So why not take a load off? I was planning to have a light luncheon and tea sometime next week at my family's Blackthorne estate. _

_It would be marvelous if you could attend. Why not catch up and chat? I'd also like the chance to speak a little business as well and perhaps offer Sarasaland some aid. Please RSVP if you plan to attend, that way I can pencil in our date and make plans accordingly._

_Lady Clawdia Blackthorne_

I lowered the letter, floored. _Clawdia_ wanted to meet with _me_ of all people? Quite honestly, I was very curious. The little I knew of her left me as impartial; she had been cool and civil though I received the distinct vibe that if she wanted, she could be effortlessly callous.

It was obvious as to why Bowser hated her and most of the Koopalings—save Ludwig, who had a genuine relationship with his mother—were fairly lukewarm about her.

I combed through the letter once more, admiring the beautiful cursive penmanship; I've never been to the Darklands without having to see Bowser, and I wonder what kind of business Clawdia wished to speak of.

Though safety had bubbled up in the back of my mind as a concern, I quickly dismissed it; Clawdia Blackthorne was an intelligent, calculating Koopette and she knew good and well doing anything to sabotage my safety, my well-being would get her shit _wrecked_.

Bowser already had an open, blatant hatred for her and screwing with me would be the last thing she would do. I won't lie, the offered business proposal had peaked my interest. You know what, I am going to take her up on her luncheon. I'll send my correspondence later this evening.

It wasn't too soon when there was another knock on my door, "Princess, it's time."

* * *

><p>The throne room was abuzz with servants, councilmen and soldiers. Even at the ungodly hour of dawn, almost everyone appeared alert and awake.<p>

Father stood near the front of the procession, waiting with his usual enviable calm and poise. If he didn't blink every now and then, he could pass as a statue.

Two stern, high-ranking soldiers with thick, black armor were encamped on both sides of Father. A fritz of static rose and the solider to the right touched his ear piece. He murmured back a quiet response before crisply turning to Father, "Emperor, the Darklandian elites have arrived."

Father nodded, "Let them in, please."

"At once, Sire. Contacting the Commander."

Toadux, who stood nearest to the front door, touched his ear piece to receive the missive. He peered at Father, gave a swift nod and quickly unbolted the doors.

A column of Sarasalandian soldiers entered first and trailing them were a troupe of straight-faced, hardnosed Hammerbros. Muttered conversations died away as the Darklandian brigade marched slowly through court.

Everyone knew who they were; their glinting all-black uniform was the iconic color of the Darklands' Riders. They were the King's most elite forces and their legendary training was both revered and terrifying.

As recruits they didn't sleep or eat for days and their training altered between subzero terrains and the scalding hot heat; their training stripped them of all sanity and restructured how they thought.

They went through so much physical agony, so much pain it taught them to be dauntless, they learned how to surpass their physical limits and improve their mental capabilities. The black armor of the Riders was an earned badge of honor.

The Riders walked in perfect synchronization and rarely did they blink. A hushed whisper fell across the mixed crowd of servants, workers and councilmen as they approached.

The moment the elites faced Bowser, they took a knee. Father stepped forward, "Most impressive. The fabled Riders have appeared in my court. Anyhow, King Bowser, it seems we must bid you farewell."

Bowser nodded, face perfectly straight, "Yes."

"Once more, Sarasaland is grateful for all your aid, for all your support," Father bowed and set off a chain reaction. First the maids and servants inclined their heads, then the councilors followed suit, and the pattern continued until anyone with a drop of Desert blood bowed.

Bowser smirked, taking in the awing image, "Heh, I could get used to that. Well Emperor, thanks for being a hospitable host." With that, Bowser stuck out his massive hand.

"The pleasure is ours. Sarasaland enjoys serving her friends and kin. Do not be a stranger, King."

"I won't Emperor."

Father returned the handshake, gripping Bowser's hand tightly. Several seconds passed and I realized neither man was letting go. They were both staring unblinkingly at each other.

I arched a brow; _why the hell does that always happen with them!? Geesh._ Uncle Apricotto cleared his throat and Father slowly released his grip. Father quickly fell back, allowing Bowser access to the councilors.

One by one the councilors muttered a few words and bowed. When High Protectorate Salini stepped forward, Bowser grinned wickedly and gave him a firm handshake. Though I heard a few of Councilman Salini's bones pop, he managed to keep a straight face.

Zero was the last of the councilors and I was surprised when he offered Bowser a handshake; Zero had always been very vocal about his dislike of touching, let alone shaking other people's hands, "King Bowser, we all know you played a large hand in protecting our emperor. Thanks."

Bowser smirked and gave him the same painful, bone-crunching handshake as he had his father. I was surprised when Zero stepped back into line laughing, "Stars that _hurt."_

Uncle Apricotto stepped forward, earning a wary glance from Bowser. Unc sniffled, holding out his arms for a hug. Bowser stiffened, mane bristling as he growled in the back of his throat.

"Just, just one quickie for the road," Unc whined, eyes shiny with unshed tears.

A quickie? Smirks arose, brows arched and snickers were hushed. Grammy looked as if she wanted to laugh, "Apro, dear. I don't think you ought to ask him _that. _Sorry to disappoint you, but you may not be to the king's taste."

This time soft laughter wafted through the throne room. But one solid, cool glance from Father had everyone quieting in a hurry.

"_A quickie_!?" Bowser snarled, eyes cut into slits, "_W-What_ did you just ask me!? Someone get him away from me."

Mario wisely stepped forward and ushered Unc back in line to stand beside Father, who allowed the faintest of amusement to grace his features. Peach stepped forward, beaming up at Bowser. She surprised us all when she motioned him forward with a playful flick of her index finger.

Bowser bent over long enough for Peach to whisper something to him and whatever was said made him bounce back, face lightly flushed. Peach giggled, patting his armored shoulder before slipping back to her place.

The King looked upon Mario and openly sneered, "_Mario."_

I noticed a good number of the Riders, who had been previously stoic, forwent protocol and glared at the red plumber brutally. Mario must have valued his life, because all he did was give a nod, "King Bowser."

Bowser snuffed loudly but said nothing else. When Luigi stepped forward to offer a handshake, Bowser surprised everyone by grabbing him and squeezing the green plumber in a fierce hug.

Luigi shrieked as his spine popped loudly and when Bowser set him back on his feet, Lulu's knees looked as if they'd give out on him within seconds. Kooples squeaked happily and tottered over to Grammy, who picked him up and spun him, "And I'm going to miss you too, young shell!"

Bowser stomped his way over to Grammy. She smiled warmly up at him and after gently placing Kooples down, held her arms out for a hug, "Don't be a stranger, King Bowser. You are well-received here."

"I won't, Queen Meringue," and with that he bent over, gently holding Grammy in a hug. Grammy smirked rakishly, quickly planting a kiss on the side of his face.

Bowser stumbled back, gaping at her stupidly. I heard a few of the Riders laugh quietly, but they immediately fell silent the moment their king shot a dirty glare their way.

Kooples tottered over to me, tugging at my dress and holding his arms up. I laughed, settling the Koopaling against my hip. He giggled when I tickled his arm, "Aww Kooples sweetie! I'm going to miss you, yes I am! You come and visit Auntie Daisy anytime, huh? I'll spoil you rotten!"

A long, cool shadow descended overhead and I knew what that meant. I peered up at Bowser, his expression warm. I stared into his rich, dark red eyes; again, he could always have a straight face, but his eyes really gave away what he thought. He spoke loud enough so only he and I could hear. Gone was his usual intimidating growl and his voice was honey-smooth,"I'm going to miss you Flower."

"I'll miss you too Bowser," I whispered, "I...I really will. And I'll wear your necklace every day. I'll think of you every time I do."

Kooples began to squirm and I quickly set him down. He tottered over to the once stern-faced Riders who were actually peering at him with warm, wide smiles.

One of the Fire bros even dropped to a knee, beckoning Kooples to approach. Once Kooples was close enough, the nearest Rider picked up the tyke, growling softly to the Koopaling in their language.

Bowser gently clutched my hand as I tried not to become an overemotional wreck. I smiled at him sadly, "Good bye Bowwy...Stay in touch, huh?"

His voice was liquefied velvet, "You know I will, Dollface."

The moment I spun away, heading back to my spot beside Grammy, I was lightly tugged back. Bowser was still holding my hand, not quite yet ready to let me leave. As I spun to face him, surprised, a low buzz rose amongst the servants.

Brows furrowed amid the councilors as Father's eyes narrowed critically. Peach and Grammy smiled, exchanging a quick glance at each other.

The scandalized murmurs only grew louder as Bowser gently coaxed me back to him. We stood inches apart, the center of attention once more. Bowser gently rubbed his thumb across my knuckles, staring down at me intently, "Flower, I'm going to kiss you."

"_B-Bowser_!" I whispered, voice rising in a panicked squeak. I peered around the entranced audience and I easily noticed Father's particularly unyielding stare, "You _can't. _I-It's improper for an unwed Desert princess t-to—"

"Yeah I know," he sighed, "Guess I'll have to settle for his then."

He raised my palm and pressed a kiss against the back of my hand. As my cheeks flushed pink, he smirked, shooting a playful wink my way.

Father cleared his throat pointedly. His eyes were cut so thin they didn't look open. Bowser clenched my hands tightly one last time before he finally relinquished his hold.

I noticed all of the Riders were smirking; guess they appreciated the little show their king had just put on. Bowser gave one last meaningful glance back at me before he spun on his heel.

The moment he did, all of his soldiers about-faced in one single, smooth motion. Bowser tromped towards the door and with a snap of his claws, the legion of Riders marched after him.

As Bowser stepped through the door, the last of his menacing figure was swallowed by the bright glow of daylight. The servants slowly scattered, resuming their jobs, though I noticed Alabaster hung around, grinning at where Bowser had been seconds prior.

One quick, sharp look from Father had him leaping back into his work. The councilors slowly returned to their duties, heading back to their offices to look over administrative work. Unc wrapped an arm around Father and led him off somewhere.

"Miss him?"

I peered at Zero. He was looking at the door Bowser had stepped out of. I followed his gaze, silently hoping this wouldn't be the last time Bowser stepped through my palace doors.

Zero ignored my lack of a response and answered back in a genial tone, "By the way, nice necklace. Wonder where you got _that_ from."

I touched my new jewelry, "From somewhere."

"Yes from _somewhere,_" he replied sarcastically, still smirking, "Though _Darklandian rubies_ are very rare, and quite expensive to purchase. Yes, I do wonder who gave you _that_."

And with nothing more to say, oddly enough Zero went over to Alabaster and began to talk. I didn't miss the way they both threw Mario dirty glances every now and then. Well, it was more so Alabaster, Zero simply stared at him neutrally.

A hand lightly squeezed my shoulder. The soft aroma of lavender let me know it was Grammy, "Oh don't be so sad _Pichi, _he'll be back."

"...Yeah," I muttered.

Grammy took my face within her hands and stretched my cheeks until my lips were pulled into a forced smile, "There we go! Turn that frown upside down!"

I tried to force my features into a deep frown but it was next to possible. Grammy mashed my face together until my lips puckered together in an unattractive pout. She began to laugh, "This is what you kids call duck face, isn't it? It's absolutely horrid, that's what it is!"

I laughed, and with my cheeks still mashed together I told her,"Grawwmy, leh go."

Peach approached us, joining in our group huddle. Grammy smiled, finally releasing my face, "Now come on, no need for sad faces. I've got an idea! Let's go to my room and have a light luncheon. It's about time I caught up on my gossip after all."

I smiled sadly; I could easily see through my grandmother's thin ploy. She still ought to be in bed recovering, but she felt the need to cheer me up. And really, it was pretty hard to be blue in the company of both Peach and Grammy.

Peach laughed, "Then you'll _love_ to hear what happened at our tea party yesterday."

Grammy's blue eyes glittered like sapphire, "_Ooh_! Do tell!"

We all began walking towards Grammy's suite. I was content to passively listen to Peach and Grammy hash out the details of our fun, yet silly tea party. All the while, I really, truly hoped this wouldn't be the last time I could see Bowser.

* * *

><p>Bowser and his crop of high-ranked soldiers gathered a ways out from the desert palace. The airship <em>Draconian <em>had all engines and turbines fired up and raring to go. As the ostentatious airship growled and rumbled, the King stared at the looming Grand Palace longingly. His stay in the desert had been one hell of an emotional rollercoaster ride, but it was all worth it. All the time he spent with Daisy, the fun he had with Grammy and even the last few days when the Emperor had been somewhat warm, Bowser had enjoyed that time too.

Even with Peach's _absurdly badass_ levels of blackmail and Apricotto's quirky, idiotic personality, Bowser really liked their family dynamic. And most people annoyed him.

But not them, especially Flower. She was different. They could fight, spit, curse and after fuming for a few hours they could work out their differences. Bowser _never _apologized and yet when he did something selfish, when he was with Daisy, he found a way to do it.

Stars he was becoming soft...If the ruthless Morton Senior were still alive, he would have soundly kicked his son's ass and then have him strung up in a dungeon by his knuckles.

Bowser sighed; tiredly running his claws over his eyes. He had to get out of here before he grew sad and mushy and despite trusting the Riders with his life, _no one_ should see King Bowser moping and pining over a foreign princess. He took a final deep breath and when he turned to face his subordinates, his face was stone, "Okay, we all accounted for and ready to go?"

A Fire bro named Koopter cleared his throat. "No Sir..."

The King blinked, "Wait _what?_ What do you mean we're not all accounted for? Who the hell is missing? No, scratch that, give me a sec, I'll know."

Eyes narrowed, Bowser scanned the faces of his elites until he discovered the missing soldier, "Where the hell is Lefty?"

"Uh, he said something caught his eye Sir," the same Fire bro answered uneasily.

"Something caught his eye?" Bowser parroted incredulously, brows furrowed in a knot, "_Something caught his eye_? Are you _shitting_ me?"

"No Sir," Koopter replied. Then he cleared his throat uneasily, "I...shit you...not..."

"How many Koopas are in this Stardamn squadron?"

"Fifteen, Sire."

"So _fifteen_ elite guards thought it was _perfectly acceptable_ for your fellow Koopa to go off in the middle of a _foreign kingdom_? A foreign kingdom that's bordering on _war!?"_ Bowser's voice grew guttural and deeper with each passing word.

The Riders shuffled, but didn't say a word in edgewise. They were smart for doing so.

Bowser mentally chewed the fat; going back to Sarasaland to find one of his men would not only make him look bad, but it would also seem suspicious. He managed to leave on Sakuro's slightly good side—if there was such a thing—he had no plans to ruin that.

The King crossed his arms, eyes narrowed, "Well, does Lefty know to meet us here?"

"Yes Sir..."

"Good," Bowser growled, "Because we're going to wait _right here_ for his return. And every minute I have to wait, your entire brigade has to run miles around the palace."

A collective groan arose from the soldiers but Bowser laughed; serves these chumps right for pulling a stunt like this. Though Bowser was surprised; Lefty was one of the few Hammer bros who had their shit together. It wasn't like him to just run off in foreign territory like an idiot.

"Sir?"

"_What?_" Bowser growled irritably.

"While we wait...would you like to play go cheep-cheep?" The hammer bro offered, shuffling a deck of cards.

Bowser glared at them all incredulously, "_You _think_ I_ would want to play a dumb game like that!? Junior plays that game and he's _six_!"

"Uh..." The Hammer bro elite gulped, eyes doubling in size, "sorry, Sir."

"...Aw what the hell. Deal me in. If Lefty's holding me up, then it better be over something frickin' _important_."

* * *

><p><em>"Woohoohoo<em>! Alright! An _apple_! Can't remember the last time I had one of these babies!"

Lefty turned a corner and a bright burst of light made everything in his vision glow white. He shielded his eyes, squinting against the intense sun before he could finally see. He snuck into one of the palace's side entrances the moment he found out there were apples—Sarasaland's apples were _the best_—and he wouldn't be gone for long.

The golden sand seemed to magically melt away into a pretty, green, lush garden. Where there once sat an endless golden sea of sand, now lay bushes, trees and thriving shrubbery. There were fragrant multicolored blossoms and trees that bore brightly colored fruit.

And some of those succulent, red apples were looking _mighty_ fine, glistening with a touch of morning dew. The Hammerbro had the mind to pluck himself several apples and see if they were as sweet as they appeared before a sudden movement to his right snagged his attention.

He cursed and quickly crouched down; if he was caught, the sand humans wouldn't be happy and then he'd answer to King Bowser. And _no one _wanted to answer to King Bowser.

In the center of the green pasture sat a willowy, slender woman. Her skin was pale, reminiscent of the glowing splendor of the moon. Her dark, ebony tresses contrasted against her cool skin and seemed to make the blues of her irises bright and the red of her lips hot.

Lefty blinked, gawping at her stupidly as she was none the aware, quietly absorbing a novel. He would have thought she were a statue if she didn't turn a page in her novel every now and then.

What a view; the human woman with the shimmering ebony hair, moon-white skin and those tempting red lips; she was certainly one of the nicest sights he'd seen in awhile and he'd be _damned_ if he let this opportunity pass.

They were the only two people in this pretty green garden and that meant there were no prying eyes or any extra set of ears.

There was no one around to judge either of them. There was no one around to enforce their roles: he didn't have to pretend to be a callous, hardass elite, one of King Bowser's top armed guards and she didn't have to be a stuck-up court lady.

It didn't even pass in his mind that she might alert nearby guards; he was too focused, too honed in onto her to think straight.

Lefty hurriedly wiped away any invisible specks of dirt from his shell, did a breath check and with the biggest, wildest grin, turned on his most cocky swagger and strutted over.

Humans must have had terribly dulled senses because she didn't even bother to look up at his approach and he had been loud intentionally.

The clunky shell and hefty boots always fooled people; if he had wanted, he could have snuck up on her with all the expertise of an assassin. Lefty leaned against the bench smoothly and chirruped a happy, "Heidi ho there Human lady!"

The human woman peered down her nose at him. Her eyes were cut so thin, he could barely tell they were open, "_Hello."_

Either he ignored the obvious frost in her voice, or didn't care for it; it was a little of both. "I certainly haven't seen _you_ here before," he began conversationally.

"That's because you don't live here," she was already back to reading her novel, eyes darting across the pages in laser-like scans, "You realize the rest of your troupe have left without you?"

"Fear not, Human lady, they're waiting for me. You know I'm one of King Bowser's top guards?" He smirked, studying his claws with feigned nonchalance, "Don't get too excited now."

Angora peered up, looking very annoyed for a split second, "_Why_ are you here? Isn't this a breach of protocol?"

"Why am I here? Well," Lefty smirked, "Years ago, my mother and father felt a little _frisky_ and ended up having—"

The human woman looked vexed, raising a hand to immediately shut him the hell up, "How dreadfully _wanton_…I_ meant_ how did you end up in this garden? This is one of the palace's most private, personal gardens royalty and elites can access. I go here because it's quiet," Then she huffed and uttered under her breath, "Well, apparently not _anymore_. State your purpose."

Lefty grinned, "I'm here to talk to you, obviously. Boy, you humans certainly need to try harder to keep up."

"And _Koopas clearly_ need to read between the lines," she huffed, "If you leave now, I won't alert the guar—"

"Well, guess I'll start the introductions then. I'm Lefty. One of King Bowser's elite guards and you are…?"

"Anonymous."

"What? _Aww,_" The Hammerbro smirked, "C'mon human lady what's your _real _name? You got a human name?"

The court woman finally peered up from her book. Amused, she arched a well-shaped brow and smirked deviously; Stars that devilish look nearly made his temperature quadruple, "'_Human name_?' What pray tell consists of a _human name_?"

"Like Lilly. Angela? Marie? You look like you could be a Marie."

But the enigmatic lady intentionally ignored his question, "Hmm. So you're one of the Koopas who is constantly being tromped on by Mario. That _is _quite impressive. Day in and day out knowing you're going to get trampled and yet you still show up to your post. What _utter_ dedication."

Lefty arched a brow ridge; oh she was feisty was she? And she had jokes. He leaned closer to her, making sure not to break into her personal space. Not yet anyways, "Oh _yeah_? Well once, I smacked him on the head. And if you know Mario, you know that's no small feat!"

"How_ cultured_ you are."

"Hey! You don't see me insulting you and your humany ways!" Then Lefty snapped his fingers at the illumination of a new idea, " Ah ha! I've got an idea! Look, how about you and me—"

"You _and I_, " she cut in perfunctorily, smiling with a sharp ruthlessness.

"Yeah whatever, how about _you and I_ take a fun night out on the town," the Hammerbro smiled so largely, and so wickedly Angora realized his teeth were sharp, "It'll be _wild_! We'll gorge on some kick ass food, and boogie the night away! You haven't danced 'til you danced with a Koopa~! So what say you lady?"

Angora chuckled dryly, quietly slipping her book closed. She finally peered at the Hammerbro, Koopa; which one was he? Or was he both? Her cerise lips smoothed into a thin smile, "How old are you? Does your mother know you're behaving this way? Shamelessly flirting with women like a boor?"

"Wha—?_ Pssh_! I'm legal if that's what you mean," he grinned. Then he leaned into her personal boundary and when he spoke, she didn't miss the heated intensity behind his stare, "_Way_ legal if ya know what I mean."

Angora laughed wryly, "I am unfamiliar with the dynamic behind Koopa aging but I'm positive I am old enough to be your mother. Unlike _most _elitist men, I'm _not_ into dating children."

"How old is Princess Daisy?"

Angora peered at him speculatively, "You are familiar with our princess?"

"Yeah" he nodded, smirking, "We played soccer together and every time she visits the palace, I'm the guard stationed at the entrance of the kingdom. We always chat. She's a pretty nice gal. But my point was I'm closer to her age."

"Like I said," Angora closed her book—this time to purposely end their discussion—"You're _far_ too young if you are near the princess' age."

"How old is she? Twenty five, that's my age in human years," the Hammerbro eyed her speculatively, still smirking, "My actual age is probably closer to what you want, but I've been told our _actual_ ages worry you humans."

"Still young," she huffed, "Look Mister...?"

" Leviticus Kornelius Koopa. Though you can call me Lefty," the Koopa was still grinning as widely as a fool, even in the face of her overt dismissal.

And was he inching closer? Each time she peered at him, it seemed he was always half a step closer than he was seconds ago. And perhaps she was imagining things, but she was beginning to contract an unladylike heap of sweat on her skin. Sitting near Leviticus was like sitting next to an open flame.

"Yes, well Leviticus—"

"Lefty, please," he smirked, "I'm only Leviticus when I'm in trouble, or when my grandmother's around."

"Well then Mister…_Lefty_," she felt ignoble just speaking his name, "I'm not sure how things work out in your culture, but in ours humans generally marry those of a similar age range."

Lefty bobbed his head agreeably, "The same applies to Koopas."

"Though truthfully, it's difficult for someone my age to...marry" she frowned, and it made her smooth, regal features become marble-like and austere, "Men my age tend to _appreciate _younger women more."

Once she realized what she had said, Angora froze. Did she _really_ just divulge that to a stranger? A person—Koopa she had only been speaking to for less than ten minutes? She hadn't even shared information like that with friends she had known since childhood.

She was surprised when the sly Hammerbro's genial expression darkened, "I knew human males were _stupid,_ but dumb enough not to marry you? Hell, you're as pretty as a flower! I've always thought Princess Daisy was a cute human girl, and Princess Peach is a knockout but no other human girl I've seen _compares_ to you. There's something majestic and beautiful about you. Stars, I had the wind knocked out of my shell when I saw you sitting here."

Angora froze, the strength of his sincerity made her halt. For once unhidden surprise glowed upon her features. Stars, when was the last time someone had spoken with such conviction like that? Lefty spoke with no sly grin brimming of hidden agenda; he spoke as if he had simply stated a fact.

Angora cleared her throat, trying to ignore both the Koopa's intense gaze and the unusual flush of her own face; when was the last time a man had blatantly hit on her like this?

And _no. _The boorish, crude catcalls from a man idling at a street corner did not count. The upstanding, chivalrous men of wealthy Sarasaland society sort of _hinted _at their attraction. Koopas apparently had no shame with such a thing.

If they liked you, they _liked _you. They pursued tenaciously and with an intensity a woman couldn't ignore. Despite how hush-hush rumor was kept within the Sarasalandian court, court women were _very _aware of King Bowser's courting style.

They watched everything with scrupulous eyes; they noticed the gifts, the brief articles that highlighted their nights out, and _how _he even _looked _at Princess Sarasaland. It was obvious the king was relentless with his pursuit of Princess Sarasaland.

It may have not been expressed openly, but many Sarsalandian court women were viciously jealous of his foolhardy adoration and at times, Angora may have caught thin tendrils of the green-eyed monster herself. King Bowser stared at Princess Sarasaland as if she were the only woman in the room.

And now, Angora had her own source of Koopa attention. She peered into the intense, unyielding stare of the Hammerbro who was carefully watching her. Gauging her.

Was this what it was like to be pursued by a Koopa? Was this what Princess Sarasaland experienced? To be stared at as if you were the only thing on their mind; there were no games, if you were liked, they _wanted _you. _Badly. _

Even if it meant crossing the forbidden lines drawn by their society. They both knew neither Human nor Koopa society would like to see them together, but that wasn't enough to deter Lefty.

_This can't be real. This has to be a game. A Koopa pursuing a human is unheard of. Strange. There must be some reward for him at the end of this._

What if this was some sort of cruel joke? What if this Koopa, Hammerbro, whatever he was, was egged on or dared by friends, whom he would return to after he achieved some shallow, stupid objective. What if he was told to flirt with the lonely human woman and see how 'far' he could get.

Bonus points if he got her to bed.

_Was _this a game? Where he would return to his friends, laughing at the hapless, old shrew who was desperate for any kind of male attention? Angora frowned, her red nails curling, twisting into her book cover, "What is your endgame?"

The Hammerbro arched a brow ridge, "'Endgame_?_' What do you mean human lady?"

"What do you get out of this?" she snapped, patience thin and tried, "Is this some kind of jest? What is your reward? Do you have a set of Koopa friends who dared you to speak to me? Is this fulfilling some sort of male bravado? I will have you know that I am _not _to be toyed with."

Lefty openly showed his surprise; brow still arched in silent requisition before his wit caught up to him. A mixture of irritation and maybe even clarity appeared on his features; that's right he was found out. The jig is up.

"_Ah_," he hummed, speaking softly for the first time, "you think I'm toying with you?"

Angora hastily turned her head away, eyes cut thin, "…"

"Well lady, I dunno how human culture works, but when a Koopa declares he likes ya," Lefty laughed softly, "It means they're dead-ass serious. I really think you're pretty, and I _really_ would like to take you out."

The sincerity in his words reverberated somewhere deep within her. She was confused; _real_ confused. There was no sarcastic cruelty, there were no sly words reeking of deception and lies.

He was _serious_.

Angora peered at him, her face no longer an austere mask of condemnation. Surprise seemed to only make her eyes bluer and her features more youthful.

Then the Koopa smirked, tapping the spot on the bench beside her, "Can I...?"

Angora nodded absently, "Yes...sure. Help yourself."

The Hammerbro slid into the spot beside her, making sure to keep a respectable distance between them. He turned to look at her without the wicked grin but instead a softer, more refined smile, "So now that you know I'm for real…Do I at least get to know the sophisticated lady's name?"

She paused, half stunned and even more surprised when there was an odd flutter of nerves and happy butterflies in her stomach. The last time she felt like that was when she had been engaged to…

"Angora," she breathed.

She thought he had missed her breathless whisper, but the widening of that sharp, wild grin made her think otherwise, "Angora huh? Angora. _I like it_!"

Then he chuckled softly, "Well, Miss Angora. Color me not surprised; a sophisticated lady ought to have a sophisticated name. I'm guessing a flower like you doesn't give out her phone number, huh?"

"No. That's preposterous."

"Then do you Mushroomskype? Have a Koopatube account? A MushroomGoogle email? Help me out a little here," he was laughing, "I'm desperate if you can't tell!"

"I…" She couldn't _believe_ she was _actually _considering this. She was twice his age; he was young, nearly the princess' age. She wouldn't be any better than those elitist men who only married women half their age.

"I…"

She was Angora LeCatte, a distinguished and proper noblewoman. One of the most powerful women of the Sarasalandian royal court and her father was a second cousin of the Vanilla Dome dukedom. Her blood was bluer than a night sky.

To even entertain speaking to a Koopa would cause tongues to wag furiously; she was heralded as the standard of a proper Desert woman, a pinnacle young Desert girls ought to strive towards. She was beautiful, refined, feminine, sophisticated, quiet and yet…

She was lonely. She tended to the princess, herded the court women to discuss frivolous matters and then retired to her—though luxurious—lonely, bedchambers.

This was preposterous; to even entertain the romantic undertones in this odd relationship would be social and political suicide. Her elderly aunt who was comfortably taken care of would probably keel over when she heard of her niece speaking with a Koopa.

Lady Angora peered at the Hammerbro closer; once she coupled with him, it would be nearly impossible to disassociate. No one would accept their friendship, and they certainly would not accept their courtship. Friends, colleagues she'd known for life would turn their backs on her. They'd try and shame her into feeling guilty.

They'd _try. _

A subtle, smooth curl of Angora's red lips pulled into a discreet smile, "_Perhaps _I have an email account."

As Lady Angora pretended to nonchalantly study her shimmering red nails, Lefty's grin was wide, sharp, and completely sinister, "_Ohhhh! _Miss Angora has some fire about her. I _like _that. And _perhaps _I'm interested in that email account. So…have you ever done Koopa folk dancing?"

"I've never heard of such a thing."

"Oh. That's the _first _thing we're gonna do, Miss Angora."

* * *

><p>In the distance, Lefty spotted the Riders waiting at their designated meeting point. He had a heavy bag of apples in hand and wore a huge grin. He raised his hand and happily declared, "Hey guys!"<p>

Instead of warm, friendly faces he received blank stares from his comrades. Lefty crossed his arms, tapping his foot, "Oh really? Don't give me those looks. I brought you guys apples too.

"Really?" A deep, friendly voice asked. It came from directly behind, "I certainly hope they're to die for."

Lefty froze, quickly realizing _just_ whose shadow loomed over him and whose voice he had heard. He slowly turned to face the King who was glaring down at him.

_His ass was grass._

Lefty kindly offered the bag of apples, which were quickly snatched up. Without breaking eye contact, Bowser ordered, "Refire the warship's engines. We push out after I'm done speaking with _Leviticus_."

A few of the Riders shot passing sympathetic glances at Lefty before turning and heading towards the airship. Once the extra ears left, Lefty bowed his head. Now that it was just the two of them, he didn't have to be a tough guy anymore, "Sorry King Bowser. I know I've royally screwed up."

"And you did."

"Y-Yeah but I promise I won't do it ever, ever again. I'll happily accept all discipline, all punishments, everything."

"Damn straight you will."

"P-Please don't kick me off the squad!" Lefty hadn't thought of that. When he saw Angora, all he could think of at the time was the fine structure of her face, those deep burgundy lips and how she smelt like a tantalizing mixture of spice and plumerias.

But now that he thought about it, trespassing into a foreign kingdom's territory was definitely serious enough of an offense to be dishonorably discharged. All the sweat, blood and tears he had put into joining the Riders could suddenly vanish.

Bowser continued to glare at his subordinate, eyes thin and scalding with anger, "A discharge would be the easy way out. I'd much prefer to make you _suffer. _These next three weeks of your life are going to suck ass. You're going to work until you puke your guts up."

Lefty smiled, "T-Thanks Sir...I promise, no more stupidity from me."

Bowser jerked his head to the ship, "Now get your ass on that ship."

Lefty fired a hasty salute before following after his fellow soldiers.

"Lefty."

The Hammerbro stopped in the middle of his jog and spun to face the king, "...Sir?"

"You're not usually this big of an idiot. What was the hold up?"

"_Uh..."_ Bowser knew he stumbled upon some _really_ good shit when Lefty's face suddenly burned red. The Hammerbro cleared his throat uneasily and spoke in a whisper, "I-It was a girl...Sir."

It took everything in the King's power not to burst out laughing. Though it was hard, he managed to keep his face straight; he had worked hard to build up all the tension between them and a smile would ruin all of that, "What girl?"

Lefty peered up, confused,"...Sir?"

"I said, _what _girl. What's her name?"

Lefty looked even more uncomfortable; Stars, this was almost as good as the punishment, "Her name is...A-Angora."

This time Bowser couldn't keep a straight face. His jaw dropped and he was laughing, "Hold the hell up. You went after the head hoity-toity court woman!? The one with the dark hair? Let me give it to you, at least you swing for the fences."

Lefty couldn't meet his King's eyes, "...Yes Sir."

Bowser raised both brows expectantly, "So...? How did things go? Did you make me proud or shame all Koopa kind with weak-ass lines?"

Realizing he was no longer in too much trouble, Lefty smirked, "A Rider always gets the job done. I have her personal email."

Bowser laughed thickly, "_Good_. For an older woman, if you ignore the snooty expression she always has, she's kind of banging."

Lefty laughed and Bowser swore he saw his soldier's cheeks become rosy, "Yes Sir, she is."

Ah yes, when one of his men scored, it was as if they all had. After punishments and the glasses of kick ass were doled out, they'd have to have a beer night at the palace.

Still in good humor, Bowser spoke gruffly, "Get your ass to the ship. And make sure you don't go onboard smiling like an ass. I've just chewed you out, remember."

Lefty grinned so largely his face hurt, "Of course, Sir."

Bowser clapped an amicable, large claw against the back of Lefty's head and caused him to stagger. They both headed up to the airship, with Lefty looking very chastised and miserable and the King appearing furious. Lefty slumped passed his peers, shoulders dragging and his head hanging.

And just to put on a good show, the King punched the nearest object and soundly dented a star titanium heating vent. He glared down at the nearest mechanic, "Fix that."

When the last of the king's figure disappeared, a few Riders peered over at Lefty sympathetically,"...Poor guy."

"Yeah, looks like the king chewed his ass out _good._"

While the other Riders went about the airship, maintaining their posts and performing their duties, as part of his punishment, Lefty was stuck with the task of mopping the entire deck.

He pushed the mop, making sure to wipe every inch of dirty flooring. When he was sure no-one was watching him, he reached into his shell and pulled out a tiny scrap of paper. He smirked, once again happily soaking up his success and rereading the email: _LadyLecatte ._

Lefty garishly kissed the scrap of paper before safely tucking it away into his shell and began to happily mop the deck, humming all the while.

* * *

><p>Alice: Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Seeya next time! And reviewer Arice Star. Awesome name by the way! ;)<p>

Ultrra: Oh? And by the way, I'm totally not the same Ultrrashaddow that one review is looking for (nervous laughter) nope. Not at all. I'm actually Ultrra...sunny. Yes. Ultrrasunny. I'm his better, smarter twin…

Alice: Waaay to play it cool Ultrra. X) Anyways, why not drop in a review! That way I can read/stalk/admire your profiles! And by that I mean I just want to see what kind of stories you've favored ^_^

Ultrra: Alice...What did I tell you about that!? XD It's weird to say that! Oh by the way I've got a final question. Which one would you rather see. Drunk Bowser or Drunk Daisy? X) And no, he was tipsy in chapter 22. I mean full blown drunk. XDD

Alice:...Is there a point to this question? To this weird question? XD

Ultrra: Alice my dear, there always is a point. X)

Alice: (shrugs)...Well, why don't you leave a review, please? :)


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